Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - Vox Machina Ep. 94 - Jugs and Rods

Episode Date: January 10, 2022

Vox Machina raise a toast to a bit of well earned quiet. All that's left is for Vex to become mistress of the Grey Hunt...   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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We're going to go ahead and hop in this episode soon. Ashley Johnson is on our way. She will be joining us shortly, but she's in traffic coming from Santa Monica. No, thank you. But she has returned, I believe, like, return, return, return. For a while? Or for like a while, so that's good. You can't be sure.

I know. I know. What? What would you say that? What are you doing that? It's true. I'm just saying. Take you back.

That'd be really bad, by the way. That'd be really bad. Like, welcome back, and then Pike just explodes in the game. That'd be pretty bad. Spontaneous combustion. Anyway, before we get into that, let's go ahead and get to our announcements for the episode. First and foremost, guys, we have until April 18th. We have less than a week left before the Critical Role survey is closed.

So if you hadn't had a chance yet to help us out to let us know where are you from, what you like about the show, what kind of things you'd like to see in the future about the show. What your turn-ons are. Don't send those. Don't send those. Presumably. Oh. That too.

We're saying a fan, aren't we know. Yeah. At deacon sundry.com slash CR survey. So we got a few more days. If you haven't yet, take a moment, fill it out, and we appreciate it. Thank you guys. Let's see.

Talison, Wednesday Club. What you got coming up? Oh, Wednesday Club. We're finally, because I forgot that I was leaving town for some reason that I don't remember at all. I don't remember why I had to leave town for a reason. Sounds for a reason. Die, die.

Yeah, we did our funny book show last week. So this week we're going to do our Comics 101. It's going to be a lot of fun. We're going to talk about the basics of how to read comics if you are brand new to it or if you have questions. It'll be fun. It'll be fun. It'll be fun. Thought bubbles, talk bubbles, all the fun stuff.

It'll be great. You should bring a copy of Understanding Comics. Oh, yes. Understanding Comics is going to be talked about. It's a really great book. Which, by the way, I should get Scott McLeod on there. Yeah, Scott McLeod, understanding comics. Let me know.

Not on Wednesday, but at some point in the future, I should give him. Anyway, we'll talk later. This is signal boost, apparently. All right, so, also, Satine Phoenix's first run on GM Tips went up today on YouTube. If you have a chance, check it out. Happily have passed the torch under her.

She's a dear friend for many years, an awesome girl with a lot of awesome nerd cred, and she's bringing her own flavor spin and her majestic presence to the new run of DM Tips. So go ahead, check it out. She has a lot of awesome things to say. And thank you against a team for doing that and being awesome. Risha, center boost.

Guess who was on this week, you guys? I know, I know. It was our, Did you say Don Pardo? No. No. All great guesses. Foster Wayne Bryan.

Foster Wayne Bryan or Foster and George, Brian, as I think he was originally tagged. But Foster Wayne Brian are very own from Toxmachina. on. It's a very funny episode. A lot of us make cameos. He makes a cameo. You make a cameo. I do. I know. You make a came. A lot of people make a came. I didn't. I wasn't, I wasn't. Actually, you don't. I was about to say I watched the episode. Matt Heem is a cameo. Yeah, he does. So several funny ones. Not you. Not him. But he does.

Thank you, Sam, for your cameo in the episode you don't remember. You're out. You're out. We also took some of your seamen, so it's cool. Oh, cool. There you go. Wow. Wow. Uh. On that note, I am

flying out tomorrow to be in Seattle for Sakharakan. I'll be there this weekend. We have awesome panels. Take out the... Thank you. Travis is so excited. I'm so excited. You should come. I just, I love Seattle. It is awesome, I do.

I love that city. So excited to be up there. I have panel, signings, and a much fun stuff. Check out their scheduling. Make sure you can come and say hi to me. I'd like that a lot. So I'll see you guys up there tomorrow. Camero.

Okay. And of course we have talks about Machina coming up every Tuesday, 7 p.m. Pacific here on Twitch and Alpha. We talk about whatever this episode is. And I think that's all we have is announcements-wise, right guys? Yeah, it's in. That's it. Was it? Yeah, nice. Oh, I'm still talking about the com we're doing.

Momokon. That's right, in Atlanta. At the end of May, May 25th or the 28th. So me and Marisha and Talism will be there for that, too, in Atlanta. I have an announcement. Oh, yeah. I met Sir Burles this weekend. So jelly.

Oh, one shriek, yeah. There was a woo. There it was. That's all, that's my whole announcement. From the back, in the flesh. And you didn't cry, did you? I did not cry.

Some people that I were with did cry. I'm not hanging. I were with. She's still stroking out from it. And I may have held onto her waist like this. Can you see my hand? I was like holding. I didn't grab her boot, but I grabbed her real.

You did creeper? You did, no, I like a real strong huck. You didn't do it. Like a real, like a real, like a real. Can't run away. I didn't cover hand. I did cover hand. I put a hand on the waist.

Cover hand, man. There's photographic evidence. That's pretty badass. Well done. Everything's good. She was like, oh my God, I love critical roll. And I was like, I know, right? That's it.

That's my whole announcement. No, it didn't have to. She strictly plays Shadow Run. Yeah. I always took her for a decker. Anyway, let's go ahead and dive in to tonight's episode of Critical Role. And welcome back. So, as we last left off, Vox Machina had found themselves finishing up dangling loose threads

after they had completed the destruction of the Chroma Conclave and essentially brought what seems to be for the time being peace to Tal'Dore. You helped Kielas complete her Aramente in which she was crowned the voice of the tempest. And you all had one wandering thread of Hodas, the Rakshasa, of which you have now killed twice and kept returning to the nine hells to recoup and threaten to come and slay you and everything you love in the near future. So to cut that off at the head, you guys traveled to the second layer of hell, this Iron City of Dis to hunt down this Rakhasa. After Signing a contract of the devil. Getting the proper information in this regard of where it was

within the bastion of flesh in the subterranean prison known as Mentiri, you slaughtered a pit-fiend Urukash, and in response to that as part of the contract, you were given passage into this prison with your equipment. And you began a madcap rush through the prison giving the directions that you were presented as part of this deal you had made, you turn into a flock of bats,

rushed down with a new friend, a dwarvish bloodhunter, a warebear, particularly of the Order of the Lichen, named Tova, who you had discovered in Udugash's layer. And you all, as bats, flew through, averted a number of blockades, managed to just get the attention of a few devils that couldn't catch up to you in time.

And basically, the entire prison began to converge on you as you reached the central area where this Rakhashashawah was. Roshoshosh. A couple of scuffles in transition to that area. You were attacked by a large construct made of black chains from this lower area of the hell and averting its actual battle presence.

You systematically went through the doorways to discover the one that housed HOTIS, of which he was quickly destroyed while still in his larval reforming form by Grog. You all battled through the swath of chains that were binding and pulling you back as you all reached out to join hands in time for Keelith to pull out her tuned fork to the primaterial plane and cast plane shift and you all vanished into a familiar flash of whitish-green light and that is where we left off. So picking up where we left off, you all instantaneously feel the surge of magical energy just burst through your body and all the chains that had tightened around and were threatening to crush your limbs and tear your body into a mass of just crushed flesh and blood. Release it once, and you had that familiar sense of just floating and darkness once more.

And you see that single beat of light ahead that grows larger, and larger and larger, and that light becomes omnipresent almost in its size, a familiar grid of divine fire and light. The divine gate, ancient and placed, by the gods to seal both them, the betrayer gods, and any entities post-divergence away. You transition once more through this lattice, impacting with the searing warmth,

just barely cresting the exterior of your form, leaving no damage to your soul, spirit, or physical body, but just enough to shake you as you pass through one of these small porous holes in the gate itself. Glancing over your shoulder, you can see small little sparks that you can see represent your friends. who are traveling as well through this planar tunnel. As the lattice of the Divine Gate shifts and darkens behind you,

you see a secondary, small blue doorway come rocketing towards you all, and suddenly your feet hit the ground. And as your eyes focus and look around, you are in the late afternoon, standing on the dirt ground, familiar scent of a crisp end-of-day white stone afternoon evening. You guys are not at the Sun Tree. You are by the southern portion of it, not far from the farm hand who commissioned your portrait, Jameson. But the city is there before you. The streets aren't cluttered with people, but...

I don't know who that is. Not you. Well, the Scanlon portrait. Sorry. We're still getting over it. So as you guys all arrive, you touched down, a familiar resent. The smiles comes over you, knowing that you've managed to successfully return to a comfortable home. The sky's broken with clouds, but you can still see some of the dark blue behind it starting to turn purples and oranges as the sun, though out of sight, is hitting dusk. A few people look over and glance and you hear whispers as people begin to recognize your arrival with a flashy spark of light and that slight Terminator-like slow rise from a crowd's position as you all pull out of the other side of the portal. Yes. That's cool. And we're all naked. Yeah, yeah.

That is John Connor. Have you seen this? Oh, no, no, no, no. No, you're all so close. All right. Uh, . We were not gonna get here. I felt like we were gonna show up somewhere else.

I don't know why. This is a sight better than the nine elves. Can we have done that any closer to the razor's edge? I'm just saying. Oh. Keele. Clutch. I think all things considered that went rather well. Tarian? Are you all right? Are you all right?

Yes, I'm fine. You're, it's very reasonable not to be all right after that. I think I'm going to need a moment to sit down and have a drink. I'll drink it out and I hail. Oh! The tree comes up, I pull out a bottle of something. It's good.

And immediately goes from like fierce bear to, I'm hurting, help me, mommy. Guard laid down the bear is just ripping against you. I've got it at level three. I'm gonna do it at a level three. Okay. The armor clings and scrapes against you, the bits of fur which are matted with its own blood, kind of slowly heal as you touch the soft cress of your fingers

across the bear of fur. Oh my god. Did you fail like a petting? Three ones. Trip ones. Trip ones. You finish healing trinket somewhat. I think I wasn't even supposed to get three.

I'm always supposed to get two because it's level three. Just don't get two watts. Did you not have a third level spell? No, I do have a third level. So it's a third level. Oh, yeah, yeah, okay, okay. Yeah, you're fine. So you finish healing, the wounds close somewhat,

and Trigate literally goes, hmm. I'm sorry. I feel a little shaken up from that. I'm sorry. But you have some resting, you know. Likes the side of your cheek and it's like, hmm. There's one like, like, 13 year old kid off the side

that's kind of just watching this whole thing go down and just goes, Is that your bear? It is. Why? Do you want to pet him? No. Yes, you do. Drink it, go show us some love. Slow, slow. Slow, slow. Happy love. I mean, ooh. Don't run, don't run. He attacks with his teeth if you run. Uh huh. Yeah, de freeze. Nose up. Let him see your nose hair.

You see this scronny boy is like frozen in place and is partially trying to puff his chest, but also you can see him finding the instinct to just run. If you hum to him, it soothes him. Mm-hmm. This little, this kind of young boy starts humming, and it's off key, but Trinney kind of walks up. No, there, there's. He watched that moment the eyes just go open wide and white before at the side of the boy's face.

It's good that you humming. It's good, it's good humming. And then Trinit turns around and kind of just shoulder checks him and knocks him onto his ass and walks back to you. Good nose action. 30 seconds back until Doreen, we're tour tormenting people. No, no, no, you know.

It's us. It was sweet. This trip has changed us. Immiginations. I'm not complaining. I very much approve. It's nice not to hear screams of torment at all times. Guys, we have fuck all to do right now.

We have nothing to do. What do you want to do? Well, we've got a robot to reconstruct. Oh, Terry. Yes. I'm going, I will help with that. I've got a very, very large. I'm fine. You know, we adventurers lose people in battle all the time, right? And we have a...

It's nothing, right? It's totally normal. This happens all the time, right? It's actually quite painful and the hurt never goes away. I passed the last of the green tier whiskey. Donnie. Doddy. Doddy. Doddy. Dottie.

DT. Dooty. No, thank you. I'm not, I don't know. He's, I don't feel it would be right to celebrate right now. This is not celebration. How long did you have, uh, tea? Have you ever lost him before?

No. Have you lost anyone close to you before? No, I haven't. Well then you should know that that's not celebration. This is acknowledgement. That's right. All right. This is coming to terms.

I'll take a- with a little bit of help. To Doty. My best friend. Your oldest friend. My only friend. Not anymore. To Doty.

Your oldest friend, not your only friend. When you're ready, we'll fix one up and... It won't be the same. I mean, I know it sounds silly, but... I created him, and he's just mechanical, but I feel like he understood me better than anyone else. No, it's not crazy. Well, he listened, probably better than anyone else.

But I could tell by his eyes that he sort of got it. He understood. Maybe I was just projecting, I don't know. Even if you were. I suppose I could build another. It just won't feel the same. I... How else were you chronicled Doty's adventures,

if not with a new chronicler? You're right. Doty will live on in your stories. And we'll fill in everything that's been missed? Yes, you're right. You're right. Yes, I should, with some resources and some time and a little help, maybe I can build a new,

Doty. Only when you're ready, dear. We definitely have resources, time, and help. And also, we don't need to have a party or anything, but three cheers to you. You just survived Hell and Back. Yes, I did, didn't I? Was that on your list?

Hell was not, but a revenge plot was. Nice. This was revenge, so I think we can tick that off. How does you feel being such an accomplished adventurer now? Well, I've been giving that a lot of thought, actually. In fact, if you will humor me, can I read you all something? Yes, personally, pass the bottle.

Now, if I drag the last of all the bottles out, it's time. If we're honoring Doty, I'd love to read to you the last thing that he wrote, well, transcribed before we went into the Hells. I'm really excited to hear it. That'd be beautiful. Oh, God. That's sort of a memorial to him.

This was the last page before. Doty take this down. He always writes everything. So as I, Terry and Darington, embark on a mission into the very depths of hell, I do so with no fear or hesitation. Though this undertaking is fraught with peril, I have a secret weapon that no inferno monster or hellhound can defeat. I am flanked by the ferocious band of mercenaries known as Vox Magna. In the days since meeting this rag-tag company, our relationship has blossomed.

At first I was viewed as a suspicious outsider, then as a gallant, entrusted colleague, and now having proven my medal, accepted as a lifelong brother and full-fledged teammate. No matter what we face in the abyss, my comrades would risk their lives for me, kill for me, and I'm 100% sure each would gladly give his or her life to save mine. Loyalty like that, you can't put a price on it.

But if I had to, I'd say their friendship is worth about 210,000 gold. which even to me is a relatively large amount of money. Their faith emboldens made. Their faith emboldens made. This is out of character. But it's more than that. I've started to wonder,

if I have so easily won the confidence of these battle-hardened titans, perhaps I am even more venerable, more impressive than I ever knew. Perhaps after this mission, I should return home. newly confident to confront my father once and for all. Maybe the time has come to complete my journey here and show my family that I am indeed worthy

to carry the Darrington name. But first revenge. Soon we will venture to where nightmares are born, and it's going to be fun, fun, fun. That's all for now, Doty. As always, correct my grammatical errors before you rest, and go fetch my sleep mask and nightshirt. And then we went to hell.

That was beautiful. That was... Eloquent, very eloquent. He was a special robot. He was there for me in all of my darkest times and lightest times. And now that he's not there anymore, I just... I should feel very lonely. But I don't because I am surrounded by people who truly respect me for who I am.

I am. And I know that in that last night before we went to the Hells, I wrote that I was ready, finally, to go back and confront my father. But now, in the absence of Doty, I've decided to put that aside and stay with you all. Yes, I feel my place is here with you, my rightful place. I won't have access to as much money, but everything else about me will stay the same. And I know I know that you are all happy that I've made this decision to stay, to stay with you as a now poor adventurer. So maybe this is worth celebrating, I don't know. Should we go have a drink in a pub or something? Yes, we should. Yes, we should. I have a question. What is a sleep mask?

I don't like seeing lights at night. It sort of wakes me out of my dream state. Should you go over your whole head? Just my eyes and nose, you know, just on top of the nose. Just the smallest of questions though. Yes. The amount that you just wrote down with Dotya, would we be seeing that before you cut off ties? I don't think we should venture up there right now. Right. Yeah.

We have adventuring to do, don't we? Things to help rebuild and... We didn't we need to be here a while. We may be taking a bit of a break. A funny moment in time when you met us, Terrian. Yes. We had a bit of a list. We've had a couple lists.

And we've checked an awful lot off of them. And we're real tired. We're thinking of taking it easy for a bit. Wouldn't it be fun though to just like set up shop here and hang out? Tinker, design. You could repair things for small change on the side? Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's how you can make some money, maybe tinker for a living?

Sure, would I charge, I mean, I haven't tinkered for money before. Do you get, what, two, three thousand gold per little? Here, yes. For a year? The tinkering, it. Yeah, they're about. I don't actually, to be fair, I don't actually know what tinkering pays. Is there anything that pays much, much more than that?

Being a hero in adventuring or being born in a... All right. born into a lot of money. A lot of money. But you know what? I'm ready to set aside money for now. Right. And just live my life and be my own man.

Because if I do, when I do eventually go back home, I don't want to seem like I'm trying to prove something to him. I just want to be my own man. Yeah. Right? And have him accept me for that, like you all have. Well. I know there's a lot of money and like being a manhole.

A man whore? Yeah. sell your body, you know? Put that hair to good use. That is true, Terry. You are a pretty boy. It's true. My hair.

You don't actually have to listen to a man who needed an eye mask explained to him, but... Who will brush my hair at night? Well, that's a conundrum. You can make a new dirty to, maybe a smaller dirty just to brush hair? Yes, I will. Will you help me? Yes, of course. You know, if you're wanting to,

Become a more independent and solitary man, then maybe you learn how to brush your own hair. As always, wise words, Keyless. Thank you. Thank you. Health has done something to you. Also, we feel very badly about Doty, obviously, and I hope that you can build a replacement.

But in all the years that you were with them, I mean, did you have a sweetheart or an acquaintance even? I, nothing to speak of. I mean, if you can push yourself to go to the nine hells, you can go out to a tavern with us and meet people. Let's get a little a little funsy action there. Are you talking about intercourse?

Well, at the very least, we're talking about advanced flirting. It's very good. And Bax over here is a great wingman. All right. Get it? To you. I could try that out. Sure. Yeah. That's a great idea. Yes. Try that out.

Thank you. I mean, I mean, this is forward. Do you, do you go rogue or ranger or taco or a hot dog or? I do not understand what you are saying. I suppose there's liquor we could find out. This is all.

Vogue Ranger. We're going to find out, right? Let's just roll a dice and see what they fall. All right. Slang, buddy. You've got to learn some slang. All right, yes, let's go. But the money situation, though, like, really, like, you are paying.

It's okay. No, but, you know, you always said, you know, you pay your debts and all that, but, like, so you have some, so I just wanted to make sure that that's actually happening. Maybe we could get to that tomorrow. It's not really bad for you. I feel bad about everything.

And I'm really happy for you. for being your own man and all of that. I just want to make sure that. I could probably figure out how much I currently have. It's just Doty used to keep track of that for me. Oh, did you? I can keep track of it for you, gladly. Can I incite him to see if this is bullshit or like legitimate tears? Oh.

I'm out of luck too. That's so exciting. Hold on. Roll against it. Oh, that's terrible. This is worse. No, there's no. Doubtful.

What did you get? Five! Then are we rolling. Wait, what did you add? Persuasion if you're honest, deception if you're not. Don't tell me which one it is. Okay. But then tell the number.

Oh, five. Five and five. What does that mean? Five and five. He meets the DC, so tell him. I have 34,000 gold pieces. I thought you had a lot of money. She said out of accent, appalled. Where's my money, Jerry? So Vax.

So Vax. You get the essence. I don't know. Here's how it works. In character, in character, Vex, you get this sense that he... Wait, wait, wait. Vex or Vax? Because you're the one who read this. As all this is happening, everyone's...

You get the sense that maybe he's not currently worth as much as he leads on. I was also curious if the tears felt like crocodile tears or... Oh. Yeah. Just at that last moment? Yeah, were you really like... I just didn't want to tell her how much. much money I have. Right.

But before, I'm genuinely sad about Dony. But in this moment, a little bullshitty. In this moment, a little bullshity, I think. I didn't read any of that. We don't need to, we can talk about this tomorrow. Let's just go get him drunk. He'll probably tell you if he's drunk. I'm sorry, you're right in front of me.

Let's go have a drink. Are we still in the middle of farmland? You guys are in the street, so you're slowly walking through the streets of Whitestone. If you're looking for a pub in particular, the one you usually go to is the tipsy court. the topsy quorum. It does what you're going to get a drink. That's my favorite. I always forget the name. Old faithful. It's the best bars where you always forget the name, isn't it?

On the way, because I'm kind of the more northern side, northeastern side of White Stone, you do see there's a crowd of people what looks to be a caravan is being packed up. There are a number of carts and horses, and there's, things are being loaded up for what looks to be some sort of a a fairly large travel pack of people. You do hear the laughter of children coming from the right of you, and then pushing through the crowd.

You see Odessa, Ilya, and Grend, Tal'Dore, children go running past as they're being chased by two Asimar boys, blue skin, running past them and they're kind of giving a joking chase tickle, and all this, so when the kids turns around with a stick, and he stops and puts his hands up, and they all look over look over and see you guys, and then immediately get kind of sheepish and put their hands to their side. You see, you know, Kior kind of nods and he nods, and the kids go running off again, not really paying attention to you guys.

We'll go get them. They both kind of continue off after the kids just as Saldah, Tal'Dorei, walks up from between some of the pale guard that are currently helping load things under these carts, and she sees you all and comes forth. Oh my goodness, it's so great to see you all, safe and sound. Interesting. And the last few times you've seen her, she's looked a little frazzle, but still with what remains of her formal attire, which she had on her after the attack on tell her. Right now, she's read very simply. She's put, she, you wouldn't be able to tell her from most of the regular casual farm folk, you know, and you would have no instinct of the noble lifestyle that she comes from, and it suits her well.

She smiles and kind of greets and gives respectful bow. So we're heading back to Eman. They'll be happy to have you. It's been a while. And now that things have calmed down and from what we've heard that you've all saved the city, I guess, I'm going to bring the children back to their home. We're going to be taking the partchwood way

to the Silver Cut Roadway, and we have guardians, we have people we've hired or have agreed to come along and keep us safe. The children have kind of taken a shine to the boys, as if you hadn't noticed. If it's all right, we're thinking of bringing them with us. We have the alabasterly. I see him. Once it's up and running again, of course, and I know the headmaster there. We can provide a good education for the boys, which upon talking with them, I think they're both in dire need of. Yes. Do you need any help with that?

Feel a bit of responsibility for them? Really, it's fine. We, you guys have done enough anyway, and to be honest, I believe your sister needs your help here more than we could on the journey there. The kids holding up okay? Yeah, we've done, as best as we could, to shield them from the brunt of the past few months.

But things are cheerier here. Definitely, and I think they've taken that upon themselves as well. Just be prepared. The imam you left isn't necessarily the Amman you'll be returning to. It's getting better, but... Dayline. I can assure you that my memory of the place, at least the moments before we left, couldn't be any more dire I thought we could return to. Any semblance of calm at our home is welcome. I'm just gonna glance over.

I think Odessa has a crush on Hunan. I don't wanna break her heart by keeping them too far away, so that's... Cool mom. Anyway, I think we're preparing to sit out for a thing in the morning. I just want to say thank you for everything. Sorry we couldn't do more.

Greetings, Adventurer. Spring has seen sprung here in Los Angeles and that means it's a brief period where it's only 75 degrees instead of 95 degrees. I'll take it. And that means I've been outside a lot more. Walking around, occasionally galloping after a toddler hopped up on juice boxes, traveling a bit. You know the vibe. And after doing some spring cleaning, my wardrobe, I got to say, looking a little bit sad. I want clothes that can keep up with me and my son, but updating my wardrobe every spring sounds pretty expensive. So that's why I wound up signing up for Fabletics as a VIP. It let me overhaul my springtime outfits without obliterating my bank account. New VIPs unlock major savings on that first purchase, so trying new fits feels way more doable.

When I signed up as a new VIP with Fabletics, I got 70 to 80% off everything. It made it easy to grab a few new pieces without overthinking it. And the quality really surprised me. Everything feels premium and soft and breathable, but you're not paying those premium prices. What I like most though is how versatile everything is. You've got stuff you can work out in, but also wear out. There's matching sets, lightweight hoodies, joggers, teas, you name it. The kind of stuff you can throw on in the morning and not worry about later. When I'm at home, my favorite thing to pull on is the oversized hoodie.

It's so comfy I could just live in it 24-7. It's perfect for walking my dog on like a chilly night. But what I'm out and about, I've really been loving the ribbed Johnny Collar Polo. It makes me look like I should be taking a high-powered meeting by the pool at the White Lotus, but hopefully with less murder involved. I don't know. It's insanely comfortable. I highly recommend it.

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for 70 to 80% off everything as a new VIP. And now, on to the show. Greetings adventurers. Lately, I've been getting a bit more intentional about what I wear from day to day, because instead of just falling out of whatever laundry baskets nearby, I've been leaning into pieces that feel easy and comfortable, but still put together because it just makes getting dressed simpler when I have a plan. Quince has been my go-to to help with that,

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and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash critical role. You've done plenty. I do hope to see you if you decide to still be a part of the council satellite or not. Gray School is still there. Well, I mean the children shouldn't be too far, then.

Anyway, I should go catch up to them. It's good to see you all. She kind of glances over at you, the curious look. Good day. Good day. He's new, but he's proving himself quite well. He's fine. I just lost my best friend.

Oh, God. He's fine. I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. I understand the difficulty of life. and the difficulty of loss, believe you me. Does it get better? It does.

With people like this around you. People like them around me, it does. Thank you, kind stranger. You as well. Kind stranger. She continues walking on, catch up with kids. She seems neat. She's pretty neat, yeah.

Yes, neat. Neat, would be the word. She does all right. It's the most awkward post-conversation conversation. Well, it might have ever had. Yeah, it's pretty awkward. There's a pub over there. Let's go get him late.

Do I see a soldier of any kind? Oh yeah, there's a number of pale guard that have been assigned to this caravan that are helping put things on to the various carts. I'm just tapping one. When you're done, please let the palace know that we have returned. Oh, yes, of course, sir. It'll be done. We've returned for good for you. for a while, so no immediate threat anymore.

We went to help. I will do this immediately. We'll be in the pub! Right. And Lee finishes putting one of the key last bags up and starts making its way towards Castle White Stone. You guys continue your foot journey over to the tavern.

I get on my broom and continue the journey. Get a little too much of Percy's Hoot. What's the matter? As you guys start making your way towards the tavern, you hear a series of heavy metallic footfalls behind you with accelerated pace. Quickening, quickening. On the glance of your shoulder and rushing from the caravan,

apparently in the process of helping it being set up and part of the party that brought, or is spearheading the organization of this caravan, you see a small, Nomish Cleric in plate armor. Right here. Hello. Come on it. This is in character, by the way.

How is traffic? Terrible. With the camera man. Hello, everybody. So, having come along, as you've been helping out with the reconstruction effort in Iman and was notified that some of the remaining royals of the the family of the sovereign were going to make their way towards Iman.

The least you could do was be a part of that. So you ushered a number of the travel carts that were intended for as part of this caravan, since White Stone had to maintain most of their hardware within the city, marine functional. And you just arrived in the city a few days ago, and as you've been helping these people prepare and organize the whole endeavor, you just watch Oxmach,

your family walk by and start making their way towards one of the taverns, this is the sun setting, and you rush up to catch up to them. Hey, hey, you're just gonna walk back? Oh, hey! We're gonna find you. Look, look who it is! Hi, hello!

Hello, Pyke. Hello. Hello. We're so sorry. We know you really wanted to go to the hells with us, but we couldn't wait, so we had to go. It was so sorry. It was awful.

You would not have liked it. The question is awful, and, you know, I just think I was a little nervous about going there because I don't know how that would affect me. Really? Just self-lessly speaking, I feel like maybe it wouldn't have been good. Like what? You would have gone dog pike or something? Like you got evil, evil?

Maybe I feel like it would have affected me in certain ways, or, you know, I just don't know. That's not a risk we wouldn't take. No, it's probably safe that I did it. That's true. You would have been really hot in your drama. It made my cheeks really red. We may have eaten some souls. I didn't look a little bit of a glow.

Really? Really? You ate a soul? Well, what did it taste like? Parsi signed a contract with the devil. Well, I may have signed a contract with the devil. Oh. What do you mean?

Well, we were in hell. It just, it's what you do. Yeah. That's bad. It's bad. You go to a casino and Marquette, you gamble. I'm never going to. You go to hell.

You go to hell. You sign a contract. You sign a contract with the devil. I'm never going to do anything with it. What is it? It's honestly it was mostly just to take care of our little problem. And in return, if I have the option of a... Selling a soul. Selling my soul for the power that I don't really need, because I have everything I need, right? Did we even tell her why we were to help? She knows why we were to help.

Oh, hey! And I think word on the street is that you completed that mission. We did. Yes. We did. The wood on the street. We went kittens' mushy. Jesus, Jesus, Christ. I just heard on the street from that guy. He just told me.

Man, there's no trouble. It's crazy. We're about to go get some alcohol. Do you want to enjoy it? I'm perfect timing. Perfect timing. If you guys don't mind, just pick up the rest of the carts and all of it.

I haven't seen them in so long. All the carts. She's being common to end. Yeah. Yes. All right, we'll continue. You've done your work for the day. Important.

State. So much, so much stuff to do and discuss. It should be important. Yeah. You have the sense in the guard that he probably wasn't introduced to you before, doesn't know who you are, and figure to know him. Probably wouldn't be very helpful putting things into a cart very high up. So what slight hint of, like, racism you might have gotten from the undertone of his statement?

You're like, whatever, it's fine. Whatever. He was just a little bit rude to me, so I actually don't really really really. I actually don't really mind. It's fine, don't be mad. Horned him out, he doesn't need his ears anymore. He's just sitting his way. He just wasn't very appreciative

and I was working very hard. You probably were. I see sweat. I didn't, you know how strong I am. You're so strong. When I make up, what I lack in height, I make up for and strength. That's right.

You could beat me in an arm wrestling match. Show us the guns. Those are pikes. They're huge. They're huge. Let's go drink. Yeah. I'm so sorry.

Terry lost his best friend. The big creepy robot that drew us. Oh, no, Terry. Yeah, it's rough. It's rough. But these fellows have told me that they're going to take my mind off it with some flirting tonight. Yeah. Oh, some flirting.

Yes, yes. Ooh. Flirting can take your mind off. lots of things. That's true true. Do you have someone in mind that you're gonna flirt with? I don't know. Yes, what's his or her name?

I assume you're going to introduce me to someone? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You find somebody good. Recase the lendscape. Super, super, good. Wait, do we know people other than ourselves? We do. We know lots of people.

We know Gilmore. Anyone. He flirt's really good. Oh yeah, we know Gilmore. Anyone you point out to me, I don't know. out to me, I'm pretty sure I can woo. Holy shit. Okay.

Let's put your best foot forward. What should we be looking for? Someone attractive. Yes. Right. Someone who can have an intellectual conversation. Let's just talk aesthetics, because once you get into it, then you get to know the person.

What's your type? This person, what does this person look like? Is this person how? Tall. Tall. Fair skin. Okay. It's basically grog so far.

About it. Do you want grog? Oh, heavens, no. What do you mean? No. That is a lot of . I mean, you're perfectly attractive to some people, I'm sure, but you're just not my type, I suppose. Too muslety, too bold?

No accounting for taste. Too much body odor. Which one? All of those things. Got it. All right. I do have a lot of those. Someone more like Keyleth would be along. Someone lies than.

than scopeded. I should be so lucky to have a mate as capable as capable of me. That was really uncomfortable. That was an interesting word, yeah, that's just the whole thing. You're knocking this flirting thing right out of the park. Don't worry, I can hold my own. Best to just like throw them to the wolves.

Let's just get after it. And maybe just don't go right to mate, you know, like you're my mate right from the gick-ups. That might fix somebody out. Or I want to mate with you. That's probably bad as well. Just don't use the word mate. Not even in like a buddy sex.

Or like, yeah, you're my mate. You're my mate. That's okay. I'm feeling confident. I feel like, remember, I'm a Derrington. I can walk into any establishment and find a young lass who has heard of me and take her home for the night. Well, there it is. That's what we're right.

I felt pretty good on that one. That's good. Hard cut. Can we do that? Is that much? The dragons, man. Rejection, rejection, rejection. Rejection.

The best montage ever. Roll for montage. As you guys make your way into the tipsy quorum, the warm interior, comfortable to you guys, you recall most of it, as most of your time spent on there, has been in various states of intoxication. There's a beautiful hearth on the north end of the complex, say complex, because it's a series of rooms. There's the main tavern area, most of the drinking happens. There's a small eating area that's kind of separate to that, so they keep the localized tavern central area on its own.

There's a kitchen, an open kitchen, so all like the smoke and the food smell comes just barreling through. It's pretty sparse, namely, because a lot of the people are in the process of helping with the tavern, or they just haven't quite hit that point in the evening. Dusk is when people start finishing their work for the day, and they usually come in in the next couple of hours or so. But you do see a couple of the Pell Guard are currently taking a break.

There's a handful of farm hands that are just in there, finishing a small breakfast and having some drinks. There's the bartender and a few bar handlers, barmaid, just waiting for customers to come in. And as you enter, immediately, she's like, goes from leaning to the back wall. Oh, ha! Sorry. She just kind of comes up and sort of shows you guys to any table you like. What does she look like? She looks...

Late 40s, probably had a few kids. She's not unattractive. She's not, you know, going to be blowing anyone's mind, per se, but she's, you know, she's a working woman, she's confident, it seems, and she knows her, she knows her job, she's, yeah. She's a lady. Do you have food and drink in this establishment?

She's a female. We got both. Do you have turkey legs? Halfway there already. Turkey legs? Turkey legs. We got the best turkey legs in white stuff. Oh, remember.

The gauntlet has been thrown down. I need two turkey legs for each one of these beautiful people here. Okay, actually. We really do, and that sounds really good. Coming right up, and she can goopsy on the nose and turns around and walks way back towards the kitchen area. She just boop you on the nose? She booed me on the fucking nose.

Man, though, I want to be at Renfair right now. I know. I'll just put one grog zero for Terry, because that's happening later. You and her. I'm just saying, you gotta start claiming them now, because once Grog starts putting a vibe out, vibe out if they just come running. I have an idea. All right. What if we have a contest?

Oh no. Great. Whoever takes her home or just, I don't like having a woman be a part of a contest. No, no, no, let's follow this thread. I'm not trying to... Tell us more, Holyholy. I'm not trying to do... Moral compass. Moral compass. I'm not in there. Spend the evening with. Spend the evening with.

I will. Spend the evening. It's still the same thing. It's still the same thing. It's true. No, no, just to you could be talking. Maybe I've become terrible. Well, that win the affections of.

Get a kiss from. Of that young lady. Who she likes better. Maybe we need just all new stipulations. Like, she ever chugs a pint the quickest. No, no, no, I like this. Who she likes better and pickles the judge, that's easy to do. And then if she rejects both of them, we all win.

Let's make this interesting. That seems hyper subjective based on someone's internal model. someone's internal monologue that we can definitely not hear. Hold on. I picked Terry's interest over there. No, no, I like this. I like this. If she prefers me, if she prefers me, I'll have that magical cup of yours.

My magic, what? Your magical cup that makes liquids. Terrytown, be careful. Oh, the jug. Yeah. Oh, dear. Oh, whoa. Whoa, shick out real. And if she prefers you over me,

You can pay your debt to us. You can have my rod. How about? Can I be in this contest? How about? Yes. The jug for that fancy fishing lure of a helmet you got. Why would you want to hide your beautiful head?

I don't. It's just shiny. This is... He likes buckets. My rod can become anything you understand. So can mine, baby. You broke your dragon killer, debt eraser, it takes all shapes, boom. The helmet is worth more than you will ever see in your life. I don't think that's a fair wager against your... The jug for the wrong.

The jug for the rock. for the rod. Jugs and rods. Yep. There's the absolute title right there. All right, big boy. You swing first. All right. I'm waiting on my turkey legs.

Just watch. Watch and then. So in the meantime, you guys come up at the bartender. A few drinks are brought by. The woman comes up again and lays out tankards and glass. Whatever's available. It's not a very fine establishment. It's whatever's functional. Some of them are more like, you know, clay-based mug,

some are metal. What's up? Oh, I said it's perfect for us. Yeah, it works out great for you guys. It's a motley of various containers. But all the drinks are scattered across the table. All right, your turkey lake should be ready in the next. Oh, whenever they're ready, I guess.

Oh, you are too kind. And a beauty to boot. By the way, do you happen to have, we've just come back from a very intense battle, do you happen to have a needle in three, Why, whatever for? My darling, it's because I'm so ripped. She can't stop the smile.

Like a grin who grows on the face, she goes, I feel like us at the table should actually get to rate the come on. Like the females should get to rate these. I'll see what I can do. Hey. Yeah. Beware, this is a no-wink, so. Don't get too close.

You're jumping in. I'm not getting in on this. She steps off. I just want him. around and heads back to the kitchen. 50 Gold says she hates all of them. I technically can't bet because I do actually know everyone. Oh, here.

Right. I have a little more inside knowledge than one should. Is she going to hate all of them? God, I hope so. About 15 minutes go by, you guys having conversation and catching Pike up with what you guys have been doing in the city of Diss and all the chaos. and all the chaos in the middle of telling an incredible story about how you ran into Tova, right?

Just to get to that point, all of a sudden, plates in the table, and you can see these beautiful turkey legs, fresh out of the oven. They're still kind of sizzling on the outside. She goes, careful now they're hot. Do you know the drink? Anyone else? Yep, yeah, I'd need another drink, don't you? You don't even need to ask that again the whole night, just pick it happen. Excuse me, madam, if I may. Hi. Hi. My name's Terry, Terrient Darington. Hi, Terriane. It's lovely to meet you. I'm ashamed of something and I wanted to tell you about it. My friend over there, the big one, pointed you out to me and said, look at that beautiful girl across the room. And I'm ashamed that he had that moment of seeing you before I did. for knowing that he got to experience that beauty for a moment longer than I, why it's almost enough to make me cry.

I've read many books, but your hair could fill a novel with its beauty. Your eyes are sonnets, your nose and mouth epic poems. and almost any feature of you could be enough to live a life on, but I'm afraid it's your neck that got me. The subtle curve, the way it meets your chest just so, it's like a wave crashing on a beach at the same time ferocious and peaceful. I want to go to that beach. I want to swim in that tide. I want to dip my toes in that water and experience it for myself. This is legit the twins over here. Yeah.

There's... There's definitely a long pause. Wow. And you're going to reach everyone grabs your mug and slides it away. So I think we're cutting him off. Oh, I think that's a good idea. Good idea. Would you like to take a load off? Join us for a bit. I'm sure your legs are super tired. About 30 minutes or so before the rest of this place fills up with folks far less interest in the news. So unfortunately, I've got to be ready for the rush. Your words are sweet and flowered, but I think I may be a little old for you, Sonny.

Just slides the drink back. She got some experience. Man, I can just picture this part. in my bag of holding that that rod is gonna go into. I don't think that's a clear win. That's not clear. You might as well just pack it up right now. No, right now it's even keel, I feel.

I mean, we decided if she likes better, that's opening. I mean, if you're pursuing like a flowery lady who's never met a real man in a life, that maybe all this flower. That was a chapter from a book I read. I just recited it back to her. I assumed it would work because it was a romantic novel. That's all.

Grog was basically an asshole and he still did better than you. Basically. Don't women like that sort of a thing? What, assholes? No, no flowery language and stuff. I'll give you a lay-up, all right. You go up and just repeat after me. You just say, I want to be on you.

So that same one or a different one? Yeah, yeah. You just got to be blunt, right? You went the real flowery, like, exotic way. Now just baseline it, right? You got to get like the dial tone delivery. As you guys are having this conversation, she comes up again and begins filling drinks. Oh, there was one more thing I want to tell you.

She immediately sets the glass down and goes, I'm sorry. I was taken before. Just write out. I want to be on you. No. I want to be on you so bad. No.

Make a persuasion. I get persuasion check. What's being that way? So much better. 26. Okay, so she laughs. She goes, she goes, Oh.

Honey, I give you points for boldness. Points? Just points. She grabs the bottle, finishes, pouring the drinks and just turns around and leaves. You're some kind of a genius. How did you do that? Does you in the wrong?

Yes. I just reeled this all back a bit. Oh, I forgot we were trying to get you laid. Oh, it's a competition. Right. Sorry. Sorry. Wow. You're gonna lose your job. She just went for the bad boy thing.

Huh. Women are fascinating. Oh, no. That's fucked up. Oh, done. That's not a good lesson to learn. I'm gonna try and seal this up right now. I get up and leave the table and I go over to the barman.

Oh, boy. Okay, she's in the process of filling two plates. She's being over her hair. It's kind of frazzled at this point. More people are coming in now as the hour starting to hit where people are still going to fill the tab on the floor for food. Do you want to hand with that? That'd be great, thank you.

I appreciate that. She hands a few. She gives you two plates, picks up two of her own. This way, and she kind of leads you over to one of the far-end tables in the other room and she puts the plates down. Here you go, honey, here you go, honey. Takes the plates from you. You look so busy.

You give me a favor. If I'll give you like a lot of money, Will you tell the guy over there that we had a sweet shag? If you could hear the pop in her head of trying to contemplate what you just asked, it was audible over the music of the tavern. You look like really busy, and I don't want to a fate. Make a persuasion check with the disadvantage. That's a two.

T.PK. Nope. Three. Casanova. Casanova. How did you get a three from a two-year-old? Two plus one. Oh, you put, oh, okay, there we go.

It's like two crew. Yeah, nice. Okay. Maybe the only thing he knows. She goes, how much money is it? No. No. And she walks back.

Did she say no? She said no. Oh, yeah. All right, I'll walk back to the group. It's me and her later tonight. Wow. Yeah. Make a deception.

That is it. Yeah. Can I roll against that? 20. Anybody who wants to make an insight check, go for it. Don't you fucking betraying it. Natural 20. Yeah, definitely higher than 20.

I can't roll it. All of you pull back and groan, except for Terry, and that looks kind of broken and crushed momentarily. Terry, Grog is teaching you the opposite of what to do. what to do. What do you mean? Girls don't like the bad boy? If you want to discover what girls actually like, ask girls. Maybe talk to them.

They've got three. Don't talk at them. All right. Maybe individually. Welles of knowledge. Keyleth. Oh, no. Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Your hair is like angels coming down from the sky. Nope, already lost it. No, no. No, no. No. Yes. Don't talk to the hair. Why don't you know, for starters,

ask them a question about themselves? All right. Good idea, good idea. You know, instead of maybe just talking about yourself. You don't necessarily want to tell them things. You want to talk to them and learn about them. How much money do you have? Oops.

Whoa. No, that's a question for me, darling. Oh. Maybe just less like a money to do you. Terry's stat question and maybe find a question about her personality or about her past or something that interests her. All right, all right. Yeah. Try again. All right. Hi, I'm Terry in Darrington.

Hi, Terry. Pleasure to meet you. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you. So, what do you like to do at night? Do you have a servant who brushes your hair or do you just brush your own? No. Do you have you killed? No. It's some problems that could have gone well. You're getting close. Just try for once to think about someone other than yourself. At which point she goes back to the table to bring your third round. Try it, try it now. As she goes and returns all the mugs at the table, finishing with yours and she kind of slides it forward to you.

Gives you a wink. Later tonight, player. I'm sorry we got off on the wrong foot earlier. It's okay. I was taken by your obvious beauty, but there's so much more to you than that, I'm sure. If I could... You got it.

If I could... One thing about herself. Tell me about yourself. Would you like... How do you feel about... What do you do during the day when the pub's not open? She's trying to take in her back for a moment goes, looks at everyone else at the table, like,

who are you people kind of look? Yeah, Matt. What does she do during the day when the pubs don't open? Come on, Matt. I'm a writer and a reader. What are your hobbies? Well, my hobbies involve raising two children after Darren left about 10 years back and working hard to make some money and hopefully one day get out of this shithole tavern and maybe start a business doing some sort of a

I don't know. Textile work, which by the way brought your thread and needle. And she throws down what looks like a half done, kind of shoddy knitting job. Do you need to hunt down down? This is something that needs to children are lucky to have a mother as hard working as you. They're lucky to have a mother this day and age. Oh, that's so true. She grabs one of your drinks. Oh, shit.

Well, I'm glad to hear that you have a family because it would be a shame for someone like you to be alone. Honey, you have no hard time asking questions? I get the sense that you're new to this whole thing. Yes, I am. I don't know what I'm doing, and I'm floundering a bit. Ah, hi, it's not hard to read from you. Let me tell you.

First thing, helps a lot. Ask what their name is. What's your name? Shana. Shana Ruah. What's your name? Tarynne Darrington. First thing you told me. Didn't even ask first.

What is that mother's name? Oh! Yes! Bring it all back. Bring it all back. There you go. Now it's nice to meet you. It's lovely to meet you. I can end the evening right now, having learned a lot from you already.

Great. I appreciate it. I come back for the next round. She leaves the table. Shana? She's awesome. She is awesome. I like her a lot. I think the lesson went well tonight. I'm feeling very positive. Good job. Yeah. Wow. Wow. I feel in very, I'm speechless.

I'm speechless. Well, a draw then? I feel that this is a very reasonable draw. Wow, I'm looking up. All right. We'll continue then. Well, this will very well. Fine, fine cheese, a draw. Just cause.

I defeated a Goliath. How many more things on that list, time? So many. As you simmer, Viraghi, pull up your tankard and take a sip, and it is the most watered-down ale you've ever had in your life. Don't show anything and drink it all. Rest my head on Keel's shoulder and say, I almost wish we were back in the city of Diss right now. Woof. Woof.

What for? I had enough of that. How come? Did you like it there? No, it was terrible. It was terrible. Everything looked the same. It was dark, it was gray.

It was full of fucking nightmares. There were really terrible people there. It was terrible. People were being tortured. We saw it happen. You would have, oh, we saw a torture shame, but you would have loved it. I thought of you.

That's true. No, I almost did, and then I felt like really weird about it. And we did, you know, I take it back, we did meet one really cool person. We met a bear? Bear. Yeah. A bear there. A bear bear there.

A wear bear there. Did they make friends with Trinket? Trinket was. I think he'd have a bit of a crush. Trinket. Yeah. Did you have a crotch on tour. I don't see Trin.

Moved by the Trin is sitting by the doorway, which has been great, because I was going to have a patron walks in and goes like, hey, huh! And slowly has to step a wide circle around the bear that's just sitting right by the entrance. Just, you know, Warbird bear. Ah! Over. What is it that you miss about the city of this?

Oh, I was being facetious. I just meant that before. It was a little tense, Terry, but better toward the end. It was. It was. It got better. It's good. Yeah, look at you asking questions. I'm trying. Surviving hell, talking to women. Sorry, yeah.

Oh, sorry. Talking, yes. I know I haven't really picked up a woman in a bar before. Was that on your list? No. Oh. No. Well, like, you have, like. You've picked up a woman before, but just not in a bar?

Uh. No. I mean. You guys have noticed at this point, by the way, that Shana has kind of sit down to the nearby table and is kind of listening in to this conversation as you progress? I've never hit on a woman like that before or any, any for that matter. As I told you, I led a sheltered life, and I've really only had one romantic experience. Was it with Doty? Oh God. Doty was a machine.

made of metal. I would never. We're not judging. No, it's not judging. It would have been my first question too. I'm not gonna lie. Really? Sorry. There's a joke. It's a terrible joke. We've never met anybody like Doty before. It's true. I was a bit awkward with girls before I started out. Really? Oh, yes.

You? Debenair. I had a lot of sisters and... Royal. Well, we end up sheltered, don't we? He's got really good technique. He always brings bottle of liquor. I learned very quickly. This is an excellent teacher. Hmm, no, no.

But no, adventuring and going out of the world, you learn a lot. You become, you meet people, you get out, it's good for you. Look at all these people. I was very sheltered. We're all three of us sheltered on this side? This is all sheltered, sheltered children at this side of the bar. Yeah, this side of the bar.

A little bit. Yay, sheltered kids. Yay, sheltered kids. Awkward. As you're having this conversation, Terry, and you feel a hand kind of hit your shoulder. And kind of turn you back a little bit, and it's Sean actually kind of leans forward and goes,

listen, honey, if you're looking to go ahead and find yourself an evening, wait to hear about 30 minutes, I'll introduce you to someone. And she releases your shoulder and goes back to work. Oh, shit. This is also why you always make friends with women. They have friends. There's just net mix of them.

It's brilliant. That is some of the best advice I've ever heard leave your mouth. This is great. This is so great. So I mean like the one time before, right? The one romantic had before. Did it go well? No, it did not.

It didn't. Oh my God. No, wait. What did you say? What did he say? Did your father find her about it? My father did find her? Oh my God.

Oh. What happened to her? More liquor. More liquor. Wait, what? Wait, what? Wait, my know. Did you follow the most? Oh, no, we're sitting down, we're sitting down for parental issues. We all scootch up chairs. What happened?

Yes, welcome to Voxmachna. This is the part of the initiation process. Terry, we all went through this. Tell us everything. You guys are friends, right? Yes. Yes. Yes. My father, as I told you, has threatened to give the entire legacy of his, of his, of his,

estate to my sister because he doesn't feel that I am ready to take the reins. I'm not strong enough and I'm not vicious enough, but it's more than that. He caught me with a teacher, a tutor, once. He gave me all the best tutors. Apparently. And I learned a lot, but there was one who taught me some extra things. What was her name? His name. His name. It's embarrassing.

No? Oh no, I think I know. Please, go on. Lawrence. Oh, good name. Larry. Larry and Terry. Oh, okay.

That's adorable. It was adorable. It was adorable. He and I. He and I hit it off. We would talk about literature and philosophy and all sorts of things until the wee hours. And my father walked in on us once.

I don't know what happened to him, but I'm afraid he's dead. What? Or banished or something bad. I don't know. I never, I never saw him again. That's awful. How much older was he than you?

Just a few years, 10 years older than me. How are you? How old were you? This was a few years ago, so I would just, maybe 20. Oh, well, alright. And you confronted your father? Did you try to find out what happened to Lawrence?

Oh, I wasn't a little boy. Oh, no, no. You know, you didn't leave with that. We just joking. No. No. Well, Terry, why didn't you tell us that? Why didn't you tell us that?

Maybe we've been taking the wrong approach this whole time. Well, I'm a dashing adventurer, and I'm supposed to attract all the lasses of the kingdom, right? Yeah. They throw themselves at me because of my daring do and bravery and my hair. They don't. Have you experienced that once? No, but I feel that in all the books I've read, they never tell of the adventurers who go to bed with older men. to bed with older men.

Terry. You know why. Those adventurers are busy actually having a good time. It's the ones that have just full of shit. Has anything you've gone through with us, been like the books you've read? No. It's much grosser in real life.

And more terrifying and so badly planned. So badly planned. I mean, every book you read, tactical geniuses and strategy for days. We just go in with nothing, nothing at all, no backup plan, no exit strategies. And why do you think that would be any different than our dating strategy? It's terrible. Yeah. Everything you read about romance, you know, that's horseshit.

Well, we should find Lawrence. We should see if we can find him. He's probably dead. Do you have any piece of him? Do you have any piece of, like a reminder of him? Any items? No, no. Nothing? Can you describe him? Would it work? I mean.

He was tall. He was fair-skinned. He was strong. Since we're friends now, you're learning about us. What does your father do that you suspect he killed this poor man? Real estate. Like. He's a land baron.

Never trust a man who sells property. Ah. Real estate. He buys and sells properties and mostly buys and holds, leases them back to the kingdom who sold it to them for a huge markup and charges taxes on people who use the properties, exorbitant taxes, and he shakes down people

who use his properties, and it's all very shady and murky, but it all involves real estate. You don't want to be that? Do you like your father? He's a great man. He's made a lot of money, and he is respected and feared by many. We just killed a dragon that made a lot of money. Do you like your father?

I hate him more than anything, but... Why do you feel like you need to impress him? Because, I don't know, he's my dad. I got you, boo. Daddy issues. I kind of want to rough him up with it. Rough me up? No. You're not you, you're fine, you're fine.

You've already for you to the ringer, darling. You're fine. Shit, Terry, you don't have to go back to him if you don't want to. You can stay with us. You can do whatever you like. And be poor. Well, we can only be healthy.

There's more to respect and honor than just money. A lot more. In fact, generally money tends to be more. to make you miserable shittier. No, no, you know what, I don't fully agree with that. I don't fully agree with that either. Although I spent quite a bit of time before I met this group of people, dirt poor, beggar poor,

and it wasn't the best time of my life, but I don't remember my point. It was actually pretty awful. I think we're going to bring up how you shat on money when we first met you and talked about how it was pointless and didn't bring you happiness if you were all of all. It's true.

I did say it was pointless and didn't bring us happiness. You did give it away. And because it comes with an enormous amount of responsibility and complications. And while it's nice to have, because I'm using it to do some good in the world now, and because without it, she becomes slightly more questionably evil than she currently is, bless. It's not the secret to happiness.

It doesn't actually help if you're not already happy. happy, it can augment existing happiness. It just doesn't create it from scratch. It's not... I feel like we're suddenly talking about your problems. Or baking bread, I'm not sure. I felt my metaphor for the round. I think. I'm going to drink more. Yeah. Terry, did you want to get laid tonight?

No, thank you. No? I think Grog's offering. Yeah, I do too. I mean, I'll pay for it. Like a house of ill repute? Yeah, like, have you ever been to the lady's A lady's favorite, to be fair, but.

A brothel? Yeah. Me. Yep. Terry and Darrington and... Yeah. A house of flesh. Yeah, you go in, throw some spaghetti on the wall, see what sticks, and have a great time.

It does not actual spaghetti. You don't have to... It might be. It's been a while. To be fair. What do you think? Mayonaze at the very little bit. Oh!

Oh, that's funny twice, too. That's funny twice. Give it. Bye, wow. Cheers. Yay. What do you think? No longer, if we had said like, you're going to fire a dragon and the crack in, you'd be like, no, not me.

But this is a chance for you to go to the big time. Maybe take some pressure off and just practice talking normally to be. people who are going to be very gentle with you about the whole process. Yeah. Walking? Yeah, yeah, you can tell you. You can talk you, you're going to. Pike, are you encouraging me to go to a brothel right now?

Listen, I do think that going to, as you put it, a house of flesh is a part of being an adventurer. You know? It's just like, it's kind of like a, like a, like a, a, like a, a, like a, a, a, riot of passage and it's just something you do. Have you been to a brothel? Well, where do you think I go when you guys leave all this? D. I miss you so much.

Then why did we don't get, like, Where does she goes? Mimoses and go shopping when we had our girls' day. Why did we go say again? I said, why did we get mimoses and just go shopping on our girls' day? Because sometimes that's like we got robbed. That's fun too. That's fun too.

That's fun too. Don't go shopping next time, I never do. Facts and facts. As you guys are having this conversation, you notice that Sean is in the process of conversing with a figure at the bar who sat down not too long ago. You only see from the back, but you see a set of armor that is pale guard specific. They have a brief conversation and the figure turns around and begins to approach the table after glancing over the shoulder a few times towards where you guys are sitting. As you guys are talking from behind Terry and a large figure kind of looms from behind and smiles, as you guys recognize with the brunette hair pulled into a tight bun behind, the kind of healing scar in the face.

You see Trisha, one of the pale guard. Yeah! She beat me in arm wrestling. Trish the dish! Trish the dish! As she walks up and leans and sort of and kind of leans in and kind of touches edge of your shoulder, Patsy and goes, hey, so, uh, about a long day.

Been told you had a long day. Oh, shit. Yes, I have. Would you buy a drink? Just say yes. Say yes. Yes, please. What do you have?

Your finest, oldest wine, I guess. Gotcha, gotcha, all right. She's gotcha. Walks back over the bar. That was hot. That was hot. Damn. Oh, oh, I'm good. You see how she did that? Yeah. Yeah, that's learned from Trish.

Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel like I just learned something. Don't quote fairy tales anymore. All right. I mean, unless you want to. You know what? That's a thing, though. If you like, if that's the way you think that like you're gonna pick up a girl, then maybe that's the, or a guy, then maybe that's the way that you will. And you'll just find somebody that likes that. And you might get a lot of rejection until that point, but eventually you'll find the person that it registers with. Two glasses, slam down on the table in front.

Oh, yeah, you'll just have a great time. She pours a really thick amber-like liquid into each of these. Slams the drink down, pulls her bun out, and her hair kind of curled up and crimped from being put up, kind of falls around the shoulder. Do not peeve. Do not peeve. Nope. You're doing great. What's your name?

Shana, we're taking the bottle. They call me Trish. What's your name? T.D. Oh, oh. Well, T.D. Let's go never walk in the moonlight. And she takes you by the arm and lifts you out of your chair onto your feet. Oh, she lifted me up. I looked out of your chair onto your feet and goes...

I don't... Good to see you guys. Still working out? Yeah. I mean, probably couldn't take you. I know you couldn't. See you next to Winter's Crest. Right? All right, have a good night.

Okay. You're coming with me. She kind of smacks down the ass as she pushes you out the room. Tell my story. You guys watch as Trish, who's a good seven or eight inches taller than Terry and is kind of just guiding him with one hand in the middle of his center of his back, just pushing him out of the tavern. And you see them both disappear into the now dark. She's going to take advantage of that boy. Yeah.

Dude, I had to think for Trish once upon a time. I know you did. I know. Are you okay? Once upon a time? Yeah. Do you still? Was it a little painful? You could go rescue him.

You could. You know what? He's not gonna be into it. No, I am not CB in that action, all right? No. C. B. Yeah, canary block it. Could we get it inside of if Tarian seemed excited or just terribly scared?

Sure. 21. That's better than what I ruled. Terry. Very scared. Not happy, not happy at all? Oh, I mean, interested, but scared. I think he needs this. I think it'll be all right. I agree with Percy. He seemed interesting. I hope he likes it.

This is so uncomfortable to talk about. I don't want to think about. What have we done? I mean, she's an answer. Do you have your award? Why are you asking Percy? I'm just saying. I just want to cry on it. Why are you asking Percy? I'm just going to double check. It'll be Fine. Pussy. Just gonna double check real quick.

I haven't started anything yet. I'm just gonna take a peek. I'm gonna give that a big fat no. What if I owe you a favor? The voice of the Tempest is overruling you on this one. I'm appealing beyond the voice of the Tempest. By the... To the heart of the storm.

I'm pleading for the heart of the storm. Far beyond the voice of the Tempest. There's nothing to be heard here. The voice is very loud, well, the voice is very loud right now. Sorry the voice cannot hear. You, blah, blah, blah. The voice is gonna have to take a message.

You could always try following them. The voice used to be fun. Yeah, Percy, why don't you go like, walk down the hallway? Because I didn't want to disturb them. It's outside the room. They know that we're watching and would disturb them. Okay. I'm just got a glass.

I'm gonna go listen in. You better be careful. They stepped out of the tavern. Oh, shit. They went out into the street. You were the one who told me that I could not scry on Scanlan to respect his privacy. So.

I'll give a shit about Skadlin. Oh. Oh, you're gonna hear it's okay. He's not here. He's my best friend. He's stupid, but I mean, he's fine, he's fine, he's fine. We don't want him to die outright. No, of course not.

I don't want to watch a Terry ball. You don't have to watch. I just want to watch. It's just me. It's just me. You're very strongly peer-pressuring me right now. now, Percy, and I don't know how I feel about this. I'm gonna watch that?

I'm a bit drunk. No. Keep him from doing that? Mm-hmm. Can you even scry? I don't know. I've never tried. They left the tent.

Do you want to try? Yes. All right, Percy. Try to scry. I give them the scrying eye. Does it require tune-in-ment? See if you can do it. Scrying is not required to amend, though.

It gives the ability to use the scribe spell once per day. What? You can do. Okay. I'm gonna try and use it. Just for the sake of this, I'm going to have you go roll D20, I do intelligence modifier. If you create someone to be so pissed. Nope.

Can I use a resolve for this or no? Resolve is for a saving throw, I recall, right? No, this doesn't work, does it? That's seven. A seven? You take a moment and glance into it and your mind, instead of thinking of the magical orientation, of the ritual, your brain immediately goes to the mechanical structure of what this would do.

How would you recreate a scrying spell in a mechanical fashion, and then you eventually get to point you're like, I don't understand this. I don't understand how this works, never mind. Really? You're sure? You have to just think real hard about butt-naked Terry. Real hard. One more time. Just bring the difficulty up. I don't care. I'm going to try. The DC is definitely higher. Go and roll it again. Where his armor used to be.

Lushes hair. Luscious flowing. There we go. So 24. And I'm thinking about Scanlan. Oh, you sneaky fuck. Piece of shit. Okay.

Do you want to say this out loud or I'm fine either way? You know what guys? If I could have you all, except for Talieson, go ahead and step off the... No! What? Really? Let's go! Let's go, let's go! Is there a nice room?

The audience gets to see this. All right, don't do you copy. That's amazing. I get to stay. Yes, you do, actually. He does get to stay. I don't talk anymore. I get to stay in here.

I love it. All right, guys, close the door. Close the door. They're putting headphones on. This is the second time in a week I've gotten to the dissipation. Oh, wow. The Ruperks whisper. So, as you concentrate, Percival, as you focus, your vision clarifies and you see the moonlight over the top of the trees of the

partchwood forest around White Stone. The clouds break, your vision transitions, and all of a sudden you're thrust forward at a magnificent speed beyond the forest, and now you're not too far but south of the partchwood. The trees disperse, and you're now looking a cluster of buildings, maybe a few hundred small structures ranging from homesteads to hovels. And then Then you smash cut once more, and there you see a campfire. You see a campfire set up maybe about 25 feet between two buildings in this kind of open fire pit area. It's a central bonfire type social gathering place. And there you see a number of wooden logs set up like stools or seats. And in the moonlight and a few nearby torches, you see about six or so simple

farm folk that are all sitting around this bonfire, except it's not six. It's four farm folk, and you see sitting amongst them Kaley and Scanlan. And they're both just together playing music for these people that are all sitting and staring into the fire at the end of their workday. It's a very simple, very serene scene, strangely. They're just sitting with simple folk in the simple town. You recognize it now. This is the Tirst Fields. You've been through here once before when you were first leaving White Stone and heading south to find your quarry all. that time ago. Yeah, this is definitely a more rural area and they don't seem to be any danger. They don't seem to be at any caper. But they're both in the center of doing what they do best, which is entertain. They look reasonable. You've seen them perform before, and there is a performance face.

They're both wide smiles. Everyone else seems to be enthralled by the music or enthralled by the flames and the music combination. A couple of People saunter up and kind of pop down on the ground, kind of sitting next to you to join in, and they're kind of drawing a small crowd at the end of the day. I take down as many details in my head as I can. Okay. All right. All right, bring you back in. Guys, come back in. Or should we just take our break here?

It is 830. We'll go ahead and take our break, actually. Thanks, guys. All right, we'll take our break. We'll fast. We have our giveaway. We're taking a break. We have the Bbingo. Bingo. A complete system and tabletop tray from Wormwood. This one has a bunch of stuff. This has...

It's just mass. It's just, yeah. We have... Dicebox, dice tray. This is actually a pretty legit giveaway. So, go ahead and make sure you come to the Twitch chat room and be active. They'll have a password up there. Do we have a code yet for the chat room? Pike. P-I-K-E. Pike is the code in the chat room. Go ahead and just enter that in the Twitch chat, and we'll pick a winner as soon as we come back from our break. See you guys here in just a moment. Hello everyone and welcome back. So, as you guys are having your drinks in the bar, Percival finishes focusing briefly on the Scrying Orb and disengages.

Oh, that's a bit much. That's a bit much. That's right. Nothing that interesting. Oh, that doesn't feel good. Nothing that interesting or something appellingly interesting? Oh, believe me, I tell you if it was appalling. It was not appalling. not appalling, it was, okay, it was fine. Is Terry okay? What are you doing that? He's fine, he's having a good, that doesn't feel good.

How do you do that? Oh. Can I do an inside check on him? Why? Why? Sure, go for it. Just to see if he actually saw anything or not. Sure, go for it.

He's telling us the truth. What do I? 26. Okay. Oh, shit. All right, and that would be, okay. Sorry, 27. If you saw anything or not.

Yeah. Four. All right, so yeah, he seems like he definitely saw something. Good check, good challenge. What? What? It worked, though. Did he? You actually got it to work for you. I'm kind of impressed with that.

I don't think I'm ever doing that again, but yes, that doesn't feel good. Did he cross the threshold? Is that what you saw? I didn't see that. What did you see? I'm going to be a gentleman and not throw up from the speed at which one goes in that direction. Well, Percival, you threw gentleman out the window about 30 seconds. That's fair. He's doing very well. It's doing very well. I'm very proud.

So question, do we like crash here for the night, or do we make it back to the castle? We should probably go to the castle. Yeah. You gotta say hi to your sister. I do. Well, we've sent word. They'll be awake, I imagine. Is Gilmore still in town? It's last you've heard, and you can ask around. Gilmore is not. Gilmore is back in Imon currently trying to

scavenge the pieces of his shop. Why do we do in old school and just crash here for the night? That way Terry can take his time and then in the morning we, oh, I got so much birds. And then in the morning we can head back out. Head back out where? To the castle. Those are real hiccups, aren't there?

These fucking peanuts are amazing. I'm not sure what I'm eating, but a hook of peanuts. Might be nails. We have both, so that's, either way, could work. I mean, I can sleep anywhere, but why aren't we going to sleep in the nice beds in the castle? We have lovely beds. We got away on Terry. Yeah, he's not going to where we went to go.

He wouldn't he, he would know. You're going to leave. Big boy. Is he? You're right, he's not. We'll leave a message here. It does feel a little shitty. I feel like he's a little shoozy.

just so romantic, he'll probably stay the night and have breakfast or something. Yeah, look, you may go back to your fluffy bed, but my man's in the deed, and I'm sticking around to slap hands up. Is Shana around at all? Yeah, she's in the process of running around. Can I run up in Snager for a second?

Sure, she kind of sets down a couple drinks. So, we did her good deed for the night? I feel like it happened. It definitely happened. Question, though, how long does your friend usually stay with her cohort? Does it, I don't time it, if that's what your question is. I don't know. She's a friend.

She's like, hang out, she like spend the night with them, or is it like, um, in and out? Right here. Do you see her again around, quick me? A few times, I guess it depends on. I don't know. On the guy. She's a hardworking girl. Let her have her fun.

I agree with that sentiment. Thank you. for your generosity and your connections. Silver tongue, Tom. Also, I'm sorry for my friends and for me. At that point, she smiles very widely, and you see that kind of, you can see the mother poke through for a minute, you know, from the barmaid,

and she kind of nods, says, look, it's all right. Trust me, I deal with far worse from most of these riff-raff, with these riffraff and she kind of points to most to the other tables. It's fine. Thank you. And she gets back to work. I don't know, I think he might be with her a long time.

You know, he might be learning a few things. It could take all night. I'm hoping he's learning a lot of things. I mean, did it look like he was? It, it, I would. The war is over and both sides lost. Kingdoms were reduced to. cinders, an army scattered like bones in the dust. Now the survivors claw to what's left

of a broken world, praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight. But in the shadow dark, the darkness always wins. This is old school adventuring at its most cruel. Your torch ticks down in real time, and when that flame dies, something else rises to finish the job. This is a brutal rules light nightmare with a story that emerges organically based on the decisions that the characters make. This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s and man, it is so good to be back. Join the Glass Cannon podcast as we plunge into the Shadow Dark every Thursday night at 8 p.m. Eastern on YouTube.com slash the Glass Cannon with the podcast version dropping the next day. See what everybody's talking about and join us in the dark. You know that feeling when you hear one interesting thing,

and suddenly you want to know more. Well, that's the idea behind my podcast, something you should know. Every episode starts with a question you've probably never thought to ask, like why people do or don't like you, why certain habits stick, or what everyday advice is actually wrong. I'm Mike Carruthers, and I talk with scientists, authors, and experts, and I keep it practical, surprising, and fun to listen to. If you've got a curious brain, come try one episode of something you should know.

On the podcast app you're listening to right now. It was not there very long. I was not there very long. Let's just go back to the castle. It's just a few blocks away from the tavern. We can always come back in the morning to send someone to get him. It's fine. It's a small white stone.

We're not in a western. We've traveled a lot. You have four mugs in, Keel. Guys, it's just, you know. You're usually pukewarm so much? Or get an arrested bus? Really far in the keymate, actually. That is so many glasses if she's far in.

All right. Well, because I am not as tired as you guys. I mean, I've been working so hard, but I'm going to stay. Yeah, me too. Gonna wait for Terry. Keep an eye out on our 34,000 golden hair. We don't know. We don't know that.

Sorry, it's not looking for it. Gross. Welcome back, actually. Hey, he's my best friend, I love all. Hey. That's fair. You probably have some... Yeah, like posies. All right, so you guys finding your respective places to stay for the night?

Yeah. Yeah. Back to the castle, yeah. All right. So the four of you head back to the castle, the two of you stay in the tavern. The two of you stay in the tavern. Tyrion continues with this evening. All right, so the four of you make it back,

is there anything particular you want to do? At this point, the evening you've been drinking quite a way, so it's closer to probably midnight at this point in time? I'm a little soberer than I'd like to let on. Okay. Not sober, but I kind of don't quite want to say surprise for tomorrow, but I may have something exciting to show you tomorrow. Oh, really?

Yes. So I'm going to need you to be extra intimidate. because tomorrow I'm going to be very intimidating right back at you. I like this plan. I figured you would. And I want to have to say hello to my sister. Yes. Do I need to come with you? No.

Are we alone? I mean, you guys could fall behind in the two with them if you want to. Yeah. I didn't look in on Terry. You didn't? No. Did you not see anything? anything. What did you do? I saw Scanlan. You seemed bothered after you looked. Is everything

alright? He's fine. What was he doing? I haven't done anything yet. What was he doing? Enjoying himself. God knows. He has things that belong to me. Like what? He has the stone. I sort of gave that to him. Did we? I did. I do. I did. I do. I. I did. I do. He did. He has the earring. Yes. Kind of want them back. You don't think there's any chance

that ever come back, do you? I think that if he did come back, I would be very worried about who he was. Feeling betrayed. And I can't help but thinking of all of our adventures over the last few weeks, that he would have been he would have been oddly useful for so many of them. He would have been such a...

You know, it's funny, is that he left feeling like we didn't appreciate his worth, and these last few weeks have really made me understand how much I did. I think he hit on a lot of really good points when he left us. I don't forgive him for them just yet, but I'm trying

not to hate him for it. I'm not. I've been that villain, and the best of them. Point out all of your flaws while they're busy exploiting their own. I am, I will admit, very angry. I don't want him to interfere with his happiness. I don't want to interfere with his life, certainly not his daughter,

but I will admit I am... Very angry, and perhaps the only thing that's keeping me from doing anything about that anger is your opinion of it. I don't mean to put this on you, this is not on you, but... Not at all, dear. I'm thinking of collecting what's mine. But I pull out Fendris, and I show him again what I've carved on the front of it. Seneath, do you remember when I told you about this? Yes.

It's important. And I struggle with it a lot, you know. They tend to hold grudges. So do I. But if we're trying, that's important. Just think on it. Nothing, Raj, dear, all right? I'll think on it.

I'll think on it. Thank you. I'll be in the room. I'll be right there. I'm going to confer with my sister and about. formalizing a few things tomorrow. Okay. For Percy leaves, I say, you know, didn't think you're gonna be able to use a scrying eye

for someone who hates magic so much. Might be something more to you. Maybe. I saw that from what's her face earlier. Okay, bye, go have fun. I'm gonna jump us back two minutes, and during all that, I'm not as sober as Percival, and we're arm and arm-walking, and man, I am so fucking happy right now. I am so fucking happy. We have nothing to do. We had nothing to do.

I just can't believe Percy got, like, actually used the scrying eye. I just didn't anticipate. I'm actually getting able to make it work. I thought I was one of the only ones in the group who can make it work, and how he can make it work. Well, he's a clever boy, that one. Listen to me, I don't have any kind of timetable on it. I take it by the cheeks and I go, br-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-. I am so drunk right now. I can't wait to go home with you.

I can't wait. I don't know when we're gonna do it. You're home, your home. Man, what are it? I don't know what you're referring to in this moment. moment. I mean, Zephyra. This feels like a lot of meta-conversations. Zepra?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I want to get to know your father. Yeah. He's nice. Yeah. He's so much nicer than my father ever was for us. You're so domestic right now. It's so cute.

Tiddly-de-l-l-dee. Um. Um, um, you know, I, I, I, there's been no time to talk about this. to talk about this. I mean, we get to. Hey, do you think they're gonna stop allowing you to drink in the street as soon as we get like guards and law and order back in this town?

I hope not. You're like you being able to drink in the street in White Stone. It's nice. Yeah. It's a mountain town, of course, we're gonna be wait, wait, wait. What are we gonna say? Focus in with me because I have something important

to tell you, but I know that we're both very intoxicated. No, I'm listening. Okay, listen. I'm, I'm listening. Yes, but. Katie, listen to me. The Raven Queen is not done with me or with us.

Uh-huh. Yeah, you know when she picked me up again. When you- She picked you up again. When you brought me back, when Vex brought me back, when Grog brought me back, yeah, then. Okay, yeah, uh-huh. She went, foof. We, okay, I thought I was crazy, but apparently your sister saw you. her face, because we all saw her face. Yeah? And then she went away, but she didn't go away, and she was still there.

Mm-hmm. I, she's not done. I'm so fucking drunk. Yeah, me too. I'm trying to concentrate on what you're saying so hard. But I don't want to think about it. I just, that's later. That's coming, I guess. That's later. Uh-huh. But I want to, I want to... Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

What? No. feathery, like white mask face wearing deity, it's going to take you from me or us, okay? Okay? Because

we'll just go god hunting, and it'll be great. Because apparently your sister said we have to kill Orcas, so. Yeah, that's a pretty big matzabole that one. I'm still digesting that, so I think the only way I can really like interface with it is just by making jest of it.

I'm gonna change the subject though one more time and then we gotta go to bed soon because I am fucked up. I'm in the short term more confused and worried about my sister. Okay, yeah, yeah. Because there's no question that I'm going to follow you where you go right now, but I don't know

what she wants to do. Oh. And I love her so much. Oh. I'm sorry. She's my best friend. I know. I love her so much too.

She's the coolest. She's so cool. And she's so pretty. So I don't know how that conversation's going to go, but it's going to happen. I'm so sorry. As you guys both look ahead to talk about and look at vexation, she's going to talk about,

Vex, she's gone, and Percy's gone, and you realize at this point that you completely missed the diversions of your party. Stubby! Oh! I don't know. Let's go to bed. Okay. They're okay, right? Those two? They got it all figured out.

Sorry, I just... I don't... some... it's been bad, you know? We've turned around a lot and not... people have not been there, and they're supposed to be there, and they're not... Come here, come here, come here. You guys make your way to your room in White's done. It's so distrauss. At the door, at the door. We press four heads together and I go,

I'm gonna pretend like I'm not drunk. Okay. I don't know if I can. Okay. Okay. I love you so much. I love you so much. Okay. All righty.

Percival, the castle is dark. It's quiet. The few lights that are up in, you know, the sconces, on the secondary floors, make your way towards your sister's chambers. You come to the door and her personal guard is there. And we're in the pale guard armor. And as soon as you begin to approach the steps,

kind of gets into a defensive position, and then recognizes you and steps back and leads you in. As you come inside, you see Cassandra is currently in her regular day-to-day clothing, one of her many outfits she uses for formal meetings and such. Her hair is a little frazzled and down in front of her face. And she has a stack of flaskled.

sheets that are stacked up next to her at the small kind of desk table that she has in front of one of her large red velvet sitting chairs. However, she's not looking at that right now as she is currently enthralled with what looks to be a small stack of cakes and a little tea saucer. She's holding up and she's sipping. Looks there's just layers to that trouble, isn't there? Just layers of paperwork. Turns back and looks out you see a little bit of the cake kind of curled in the edge of her mouth and she's like, Percival! Take some of the sip of the tea and sets it down. You've returned.

For a while this time. How your travel's been? Terrible, but all over. That sounds part of the course, I assume. I'm back to help. It's my turn. Good. As the sophist of native ingenuity, you have much responsibility in this time of recovery, of recovery, and I'm growing a bit weary of burden.

I will happily take some layers of both that paperwork and that cake off your hands. And I grab a slice. She takes an hand it over to you as you take it. I do ask tomorrow that we handle this little interesting tidbit, and I hand her the documents that I put together earlier with the titling that needs to be dealt with. She gives me this.

Grand Puba, that's... We'll certainly discuss that. I expect somebody will come up with something delightful for that one. We can take our time with that one. I'm not going to lie. I had been so long, I'd forgotten that we had not had any purvey of the Greyhunt. Quite a while. A long while.

While. So Vexahlia. It seemed appropriate. Even before things became what they are, yes. And before we can officiate that, she has to undergo the hunt itself. Yes. I don't know how that works. I...

Keep a yinin might. He does. If I recall. Keep yemen should know. I'm a bit out of my depth at this point. I've done... And you see she kind of sighs deeply and looks over to her guard and kind of, for the first time in her a while you see Cassandra break from the Stoic leader to Cassandra, your sister. And she kind of leans forward and takes her hand and goes, I'm so very tired. I have missed you. And

I need your help. We're going to make this right. We're going to... The machine will run again. All of this will work again. I know. There are good people. Many good people are here. And you've all sought of that. I've sought to it. There's more cake in it for you. I could use more, Kay. I just kind of wipes a little tear from her face, good. I'm glad you're safe. How goes the training of the company of Shot? Uh, I mean, as functional as it can be, we're having to ration ammunition,

as we have to rely on you for that, and you've been gone. Well, we're going to fix that as well. And perhaps you should help most of that training, The majority of it has been at the hip in making things up as they go. And the guards, the captain of the guards, has been taken care of everything. Yes, yes.

We lost a few in the last altercations, but we have a good longstanding number of individuals who have stepped up and what was his name? The one that you brought in, Jared. Jared, is he still around? He's been very useful. he's taking care of most of the low-end training, but, ooh, that cake, it just...

We're all the big halfway. I would like to confer with him very quickly before I go to sleep, but other than that, we are back, and I look forward to making this move forward tomorrow morning. Good, yes. Bring, she takes the sheet, Lady Vexalia, to breakfast in the morning, and we shall discuss her position,

responsibilities and the necessity of the hunt. I will. Thank you. Of course. And she leans back in her chair and kind of, I think it's time for Beck. And she gets up and she goes and closes off the fireplace in the corner and throws a little bit of water onto it and puts up the candles in the room. I'm going to run by Jared's on the way back to my quarters.

You went to Jarrett's. It can only be Jared. Jared doesn't stay in the castle. Jared currently stays down in the barracks within the city of Whitestone property, because he's responsible for trading the recruits and helping build it. All right, then real quick, I'm just going

to write a little post. I'm just going to write a little letter, which I will tell you about. Well, should I tell you what it is now because the person who said it. Do we all need to leave? No, well, yes. I'm going to throw a little cash,

and I'm going to write a little letter. I'm going to ask Jared to very, very quietly. Jared, so sorry. Jared. Jared, I know. Dear Jared, get me some drugs. To very quietly on the sly hire someone to keep very, very distant tabs on Scanlon Short Hall.

Okay. I want to know if anything unusual happens. Not to interfere, just watch. I want to spendly dead. I want his family dead. I want to house back to the ground. How much money do you attach to the letter? Five gold people.

Five gold people. 16 copper. Where was my, I'm trying to find my number. I was going to shoot about 400 gold out it just to get it done. Seems reasonable. That can probably get it done. For a while. Yeah, until he needs more.

Okay. He's a smart man. He's done different forms of business. He can let you know if you need to restock the coffers, if you will. Okay. So the letter's written up, assuredly delivered, and the evening comes to a close. With cake. For you guys.

At the tavern, here at the tipsy quorum, we have Pike and Grog catching up on crazy business amongst the rest of the jovial atmosphere of the tavern, as people have been drinking heavily into the evening, like a city that is still recovering from five years of, perpetual torment does. She's so pretty with like a feather and a hay. I know! She's not the coolest way! She's really good with money! Oh no, and if she gives to the arbrowbrow, I know, and then she got the broom. But her hair?

Oh, no, and no, it's fine. She's the past. It's not fair, don't you? I know. Good shit. Do you know what I do every night? What? I sometimes,

I sometimes put in my earring and I have conversations with Scanlan. And I know he can't hear her. Who talks back? Nobody. Oh, it's awful! I just tell him how the day was and what I did. I just say no, I don't, obviously he's not going to talk bad. I've got he's got full shemp.

I've never tried that before. If you try it, sometimes I'll just see, you know, I know he can't hear. Right. Sometimes I go into like the house of lady favors. Yeah. And I'm like, one for me and one for me. Ha! Ha! Ha! Oh!

Oh. Oh. Oh. Well. Uh. How do you think Terry's doing? What do you think Terry's doing? I don't know.

I don't know. I felt bad. Once we had the story and I was like, maybe the story of this life, I was like, maybe he shouldn't go with her. Oh, really? I don't know. Because maybe we should have found him somebody else.

Like, like, we didn't find him. She just came along. Yeah, I mean, the hope was on. Wished him away. Yep. You just got to kind of react at that point. Yeah. Let the river take you where it will.

Yeah. Well, I'm tired now. I said earlier I wasn't tired, but I do get tired. Yeah, I think it too. I mean, it's probably because you've been crying so much. I think it just takes so much out of your body to cry. Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, the water's gonna come from somewhere, right? I know, it's like, where does it all come from? There's so much of it. I don't know. Oh. Oh. Oh. Come.

This grog passes out at the table next to you. You look up, and at this point, you notice most of the tavern is now empty, and you have no idea what hour it is, but it seems pretty late and pretty empty. And pretty empty. You glance over. and as the tavern is still open, it doesn't really close per se, but the night shift you see, Shana's kind of finishing, she's throwing a shawl over, she's getting ready to leave, and she looks over and sees you and takes off her shawl

and throws it around Grog. Thanks. Take care of him. I will. He's fine. He's dumb. He's not as dumb as he seems. It's good. He seems pretty dumb.

I know. It's just, but his heart is so, it's just like as big as he is. I can tell, about the company he keeps. You guys wouldn't stick around if he wasn't. She's in flowers. But I expect you to leave that chawl back here. It's gonna be here in the morning.

I will. It'll be good as new, right here on the table folded for you. All right, I guess find a stool and curl up. I'm going to bed. Night, Shauna. It was so nice to me. Thank you so much for everything. You too. What's your name?

My name's Pike. Pike. Pleasure to meet you. She reaches out and takes your hand. It's very nice to meet. That's my pinwheel. She talks in the sleep. It'll be fine, don't worry. She leaves, close the door behind her.

And you can choose to eventually pass out with Frog any one as well. Well. What do you want to do? I know you can't hear, but I'm sitting in a tavern right now with Groh Grog, he just went to sleep. Um, we had, I had a pretty good day.

I had to do a lot of labor, just like lifting stuff into a cart. And then, I, and then like, you know, Vox Makka, lo and behold, come home and I see him and now we're here. But we miss you. I'm very tired. I'm very tired. Oh. Saddest thing.

And with that, the net comes to the close. The next morning, the sun rises. Those who are staying in the castle, you rise to the familiar smell of early breakfast meats, eggs, other classic, meals being prepared for the various guard of the castle and those who belong to the Chamber of White Stone as it currently stands. As you all begin to convene down there, the two of you come to consciousness as two giant glasses of water are slammed on the table from a morning shot. Arriving, drags the shaw out from under Grog's head, which is now damp with just a multitude of drool that is just steeped into it.

And she kind of like squeezes it out. sets it on the side of the bar. Somebody left that there. I wasn't up yet to fix it. It's fine, it's fine. It's fine. She starts getting ready and a couple of other bar hands start setting up the tavern.

You hear a foot falls come rushing down and you watch as Trish, Trish comes rushing down, putting her armor on real fast, like, She's kidding, shit, shit, I'm like, shit, shit, and just rushes out the door. She's still. She stayed the whole night. Yeah.

Keep. That's a good sign, right? Yeah. Sorry. Turkey. Chicken pot pie. No. About five minutes more, you see the slow footfalls of Terry and Darington make his way down the stairs into the empty tavern.

Early morning, it's maybe, maybe. 8 a.m. at this point. You can just hear the birds going on the outside, the blearing sun's just beginning to crest over the mountains. We got like the alcohol sweats. Yeah, you know, you guys are pretty hung over at this point. Our lips are sticking out of our teeth. We're like, oh. I'm just so thirsty. Oh, you there. Hello. You're still here. We just waited just in case.

Yep. I have a headache. Oof, rough night, huh? How do you... It was rough? It was rough. How do you feel? I feel good, different, better. You feel different. I feel, wow, that Trish is, whew, she's a lot of woman.

Uh, how'd you guys do? Oh, enough about us. Great meal, great company, great night. Yeah, it was something else. I mean, there's periods that I don't really remember, but she was aggressive when she needed to be and gentle when she needed to be and you know I've read a lot about that and a lot A lot of things I've read were true. I mean, the female form is mysterious and strange. And there are curves and... So many curves. Smells.

Yeah. Terry, you didn't just give each other massages all night, did you? Oh, no. Oh, good. Details, details. Do we need mimosa? Moses. I have experienced the pleasures of the flesh.

I have now known a woman, and it was outrageous. I didn't really know what I was doing, but she guided me sometimes by force. But she was also gentle sometimes. And I get it now. I see the appeal. I understand. Women are soft and tender. And they are not for me. I mean, there's so many holes.

and you don't know which one is the right one. You know, it just depends on the day, I guess. Yeah. That's true. It can be confusing. I just... Especially in the dark, right? She was so strong and I was so scared. And I really think...

Buh! The Constitution Savior, The Constitution Savior, Doug, Gras? You're okay, you're okay. That's a PIR. You know what? I, at least you, you, this is, it's what adventurers do. You know, and you did it and you... No, I see, I see that.

I see how people are finding it. I feel like, we need to commemorate this. Like, you're not the same. same man you were when we saw you last night. Look at that face. No, I'm not. You've seen things. They're so, I mean, they're so intricate and soft.

And I just feel like I think I know what I like now. And that was a worthy endeavor. And thank you, Pike, for encouraging it. And Grog for setting me up. Without a shadow of a doubt, now you know. No, I know. I know for sure. One hundred percent. I am not gonna do that ever again

with anyone like her or any one similar. Should we like go get tattoos or get you like a new haircut or something to commemorate this? No, my body's a temple and I wouldn't sally it like that. It's a temple. Well, all right. Well, let's get back.

Did you get to, Did you need to sleep at all, or do you need to sleep? When she was finished with me, she let me curl into a ball. Did you claim sexual? Yes, there was a valley between her pecks, her breasts, I guess, and there was a nice little resting place right there there that I laid my head for the night.

And she draped her arms over me. They were like big sweaty blankets. And I needed to get up to pee in the middle of the night, but I couldn't. So I just held it. Mercy, mercy. It's like being attacked by a bear. Have you seen the departed?

Let's go get cleaned up. No. And it's tough. The chapter of the story we all that did it. No. It's too weird. I've actually been privy to this exact conversation with a few guys. I'm not the same way in high school.

Nope. Not for me. Oh my God, that's amazing. Yeah. Okay. My face is like it's on fire. As you guys are eating breakfast and Cassandra makes her way down and joins you all and

against the meal, her personal bodyguard, who's looking kind of exhausted and frustrated and tapping the toe. Eventually, you watch as a nude guard comes in and kind of, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. And they switch out. And the new personal bodyguard of Cassandra is Trisha, who stops and sets up and apologizes to Cassandra, and then turns and gets a new guard and sees a little rest of eating

breakfast stare at her and goes, good morning. Yeah. Good morning. So as you guys now, about 20 minutes later, after this whole conversation, you guys have cleaned up the major way and you gather, she just says nothing else and it's just now like, like, oh boy.

Oh, you were just. You're being so quiet. Oh. After you guys have had a meal and you guys have made your way and had this bit of interaction where she's like, Shhh, Shh. Cassandra comes over and sits kind of facing you of exhaliating this. Cassandra.

Shh. All right. Lady Vaxavia, I've, me and personal had a conversation last night, and it's coming to my attention that you've been granted a title. Oh, yes. Here with a Whitestone, a title that has been unfulfilled for quite some time. And I, for one, as myself being the figurehead of the city as I wish to welcome you as a member of our chamber. Thank you. As the grandmistress of the Greyhound.

Do you understand the responsibilities? I have no idea the responsibilities. In fact, I have no idea what being a lady really means except for saying I'm a lady every once in a while. To be perfectly honest, it means very little. Oh. I can say they're from experience. It just means people look at you and expect you to have the answer.

And you... Have all the answers. And you kind of leans in and goes, and you really are just making it out best he can, but you do your best. But as the Grandmistress of the Greyhunt, upon completion of the Greyhunt, you are responsible for overseeing local diplomacy and rooting out mundane and supernatural dangers

throughout the surrounding Parchwood. All right. To protect the citizens of Whitestone. So I'm like a god. Oh no. More of a, what would be the word I would think to use? Vanquisher. Destroyer of worlds.

Ooh, yeah. Decimator of beasts. You will. You surrogate. You will be eventually training and be granted a cadre of cadre of people beneath you as part of the Greyhunt, who you will train and oversee as they ensure that the surrounding parts should is safe in the local area around Whitestone. As you may or may not know, there is a very long history of dangers within the forest. This entire valley was the result of

a cataclysmic conflict during the calamity, specifically between the dawn. Pellor and a very dark entity. And as such, there are still scars of the land that give birth to the multitude of creatures that we need someone to ensure do not wander far and begin to destroy and threaten our people. The holder creatures are like just big wolf type creatures. Odds and ends. It's less of a garden, more of a champion.

Yes. All right. Your lesser guard keeps watch patrols, and when something arises, you find it, learn about it, and if it's necessary, destroy it. Yeah, that's no problem. I'm really tough and strong and stuff, so yeah, that sounds fine. You can do that. Your skills, actually, fits quite well for this, which I understand why Percival, I bequeathed this.

I'm more than the last one, I will say. When was the last one? That would have been right before the unpleasantness. Yes, about three years before the Briarwood's arrival. I, at the time was much younger and didn't know much, but Reggae, who was the individual who currently held the position, was not as respected as I think you will easily become. It was under the Anders house, which is why the Anders house is now fulfed.

Yes. So excited. However, while I'm still learning this as I go through our family's history and the structure of governance here in White Stone, there is, how do I, a ritual, a... That would be a ceremony that you must undertake. Oh. Just you.

Just me? Just you. What about Trinket? Trinkets, I imagine, is your companion, could be a portion of it. However, as the one to be titled, this journey is just for you. Just for you. Even Keeleth got friends. No?

Can we watch? Yay, vex. Yay! The nature of this is a hunt, and I do not believe that your skill sets would aid her in the speed and tracking that is required for this particular endeavor. I think you will be fine.

Obviously, I mean I'm going to kick serious, but, but what if I don't? What happens then? Do I lose my title? Do I just suck forever? What? If you do not succeed, then you will have to wait until the Don Father presents the next opportunity for the hunt. Right. I don't know when that would be.

So has the opportunity presented itself now? Well, it's as soon as you wish to go and find your way to the Sun Tree and meditate for the sign. I don't know the specifics of this. This is just from what the... And she starts like pulling over this cluster of books she had at the side and she starts rummaging through and pulls over. It's unfortunately very vague. And it's apparently Keep a union might know more. He's the resident priest of Pevel, and this is a ritual of his, but yes.

Wonderful. Well, I'm not intimidated by this at all. You'll like the sundry, he's very nice. Great. Yeah. Yeah, man, come on. Right up your alley. Bracking, hunting. Yeah, it's fine.

The things you have done, this is. Slead is nothing. Exactly. Right? You're not going to send me out there to die, Percy. Hopefully not. Is that a possibility? You got this.

Thanks, Terry. Look at you. You're so strong and knowledgeable now. Don't look at me. We'll go down, learn a little bit more, and begin when you're ready. All right. Sure, yeah. Great.

Well, I shovel a bunch of eggs in my mouth, and I get up and I'm going to go find Kieper Yanin. I follow. All right. Easy enough you find the central, the same kind of open almost for it. It's the kind of half-domed, kind of speaking, presentational. Like an amphitheater? Like an amphitheater. Thank you. So I was looking for. Words. The amphitheater setup, which Kuiper Yenine usually keeps for all his various sermons. It's early and where nobody has gathered. It is not any of the chosen weekly holy days of Pellor.

So as you arrive, he's, he looks like he's in the process of going through and sweeping and just doing his morning ritual of upkeep. And you walk up and you can see his beard's grown a bit longer now, and his gray has spread a bit since last time you had a true one conversation. It's been a very tense situation. You can see occasionally the accelerated age that recent events has a imparted upon individuals of the city. But as he sweeps and kind of notices you arrive. Oh, yes. Hi. Vexalria.

Vexalria. Yes. Thank you. Lady Vexoria, grand mistress of the Greyhunt, apparently, which I'm here to talk to you about. Oh. Excuse me. Anyone who often puts the broom back in this little closet

and he's clutter out, and he's like, he's like, he's like, ah, just to. Pursing's back up, closes the closet. Kind of hobbles back in your direction. You are the Grandmistress of the Greyhound. Apparently. She needs to be appropriately consecrated, obviously.

I thought that happened last one. I thought that happened last one. He looks lost. Jesus. Anyway, there's been some time. some time. Well, and he starts looking around and pulling up small scrolls and reading him through. He goes and rummages through and finds one that he pulls out. Yes, yes, here it is. So for the grand purveyor of the Greyhunt, mistress, in this case,

is to go into a state of deep meditation at the base of the sun tree and ask for a vision from the great dawn father himself. There will be imparted upon her at the moment of the gray hunt for quarry. You are then to find the quarry, wherever it may be within the partwood. Okay. And decide the fate of said quarry. Okay. That's all I have. That's it, huh? This is real. Yeah, this explains so much.

Yep. It's very clear. What they decide to do with the thing, what you want to do? We've had previous individuals come from the grey hunt, bearing trophies of their hunt, bearing various recovered examples of what they felled in the darkness. So I'm supposed to bring back some sort of trophy then. That would be good. A sign of your victory, yes.

Right. Right. Whatever that victory may be. I've read a bit. I know a bit about what's to come. All right. Well, thank you, Keeper. Of course. If I might be evade of any kind, let me know. Though I don't know how much aid I can be in this endeavor.

But let me know. Good luck. As you walk away, he said, Donfather smile upon you. And you. And you. The Don father's pale, all right? Do fine. Great. So what do you say? So I'm gonna go and sit in front of a tree.

I'm gonna think real hard. I'm gonna top to a god and then I'm gonna go kill something. She's so cool. Maybe. She's the coolest. Potentially. So cool. Looking good, Terry.

If you feed it though, she's just temper that a little bit. Unbearable. We can just temper that a little bit. When are you gonna do this? You know you're gonna do this amazing? Think real hard. Well, fuck it. No.

Hey, I buried like a secret clubhouse kind of under white stone at the roots of the sun tree. And sometimes I go there and I talk to him. I realize that sounds very uncool. No, no, no. Pretty awesome. You're so cool. But I totally didn't put the treehouse in the top of the tree.

I totally put it underneath the city. underneath the city, but there's a tree house. I like a clubhouse. Technically, it's supposed to be the base of the tree, right? You can go there and be alone, and it's so quiet and peaceful and dark. What if Palo can't see underground? What if he needs to see me like in the sun?

What if one of the gods cannot see you underground? I don't know how God's work. I think you can see you underground. I don't know. Yep, nope. Although sometimes I do climb into the tree and I just like hug onto one of the branches, It's solid, I'm gonna just walk towards the tree.

Yes. I'm just gonna follow in before we send you off into this. All right. And you walk up and, I mean, the city's starting to slowly spring to life as the morning hours climb forward. People are arriving and putting the last touches in the caravan. The Pail Guard is finished and they've assigned the division between those who were to stay and those who escort the caravan to him on.

As are you with the rest of the party? the party? Yeah. All right. As you're walking, one of the Pell Guard sees you, walks at the place. Lady Pike, are you to join us on the caravan? That was today. I think we're leaving. We just, I mean, I just don't know.

Oh. What exactly were we doing? I'm sorry, I have. I was, I've had a night. You escorted the caravan from Amman to Whitestone, and now we're returning to Amman from Whitestone with the caravan. I just wanted to know if you wish to come or stay, we're leaving right now.

Oh, no. No! I'm a no. All right, great, go. I'm saying, I've just been waiting for them anyway. I'm going to stay. She's going to stay. Behind this tiny, plated, no-mish form,

there's this gargantuan galile. with rage in his eyes. And he goes, all right, no, that's fine. We're gonna go. And he just turns and leaves and runs towards the caravan. Bye, be safe. I need to learn for pike and frog kind of say no. So, Lady of Exaldea, you found yourself at the base of the sun tree.

As you look out at the morning, at this, at this point, the clouds that kind of gathered yesterday have all subsiding of the most beautiful clear blue sky ahead of you. The morning sun's coming down. The tree is beautiful as you're watching it slowly blossom now as the months have passed. You start seeing green, the boughs, the occasional pot that might eventually flower as the season allows it. But it's serene. And as occasionally a breeze blows through, you hear the various branches hit and some of the leaves kind of shake, and it's a beautiful sight. What do you want to do? Did you want to say something, Percy? I just wanted to let you know that when I sort of sprung this title on you, I chose the Greyhunt specifically.

The third house is easy. It's just land in title. It doesn't mean anything. As a child, the Greyhunt was fascinating because it was a title that one earned. I felt that you should have something like this that no one could do otherwise other than claim that you earned it. that you earned it. This is not something that can be given. It would be fine. I have complete faith. I give them a big hug and a kiss. I love you, dear. I love you too. Good luck. All right, get the fuck away from me. I've got to meditate. Back and up.

As you all separate and scatter off into your own business for the day in Whitestone. Vixali, you find a comfortable place at the base of the tree you sit, cross your legs, look up, look up and close your eyes and concentrate. I feel itchy, but I'm okay. I'm gonna stay still. What thoughts in your mind? What do you wish to do? What do you, what is your approach to this meditation?

Um, okay. He said I'm supposed to meditate on the tree or on Pelo. I'm gonna try thinking about the tree first a lot. Like I'm gonna think about the leaves swaying and think about, finding a quarry and like, you know, hunting things. And then I'm gonna start thinking about what it feels like to walk through the woods, bear forward,

and hear the leaves crunching underneath my feet and hear twigs breaking as I hunt creatures and track them. Okay. As you focus on this and you can hear the breeze and you kind of extend what best I can describe your current consciousness or imagination to the breadth of the parchedwood that consumes the valleys of the Alabaster Sierra's

surrounding Whitestone. You focus and you remember the journeys you had in the trees when you first arrived, the wandering hunt, that phantom individual, wandering the trees in the distance that you didn't quite mark and you're curious about that moment and you start thinking about the people that lived you their whole life and think of the toil

and then your kind of eyes open, and the sun, which was just beginning to come over the hills and to the sky is now far past the horizon. You're unsure how much time has passed, but you've had no vision, you've had no words, no sign, and you're now starting to hit into the afternoon. You've probably been here for a number of hours at this point, and you're starting to feel the sweat

kind of drip beneath the armor, the discomfort's settling in a little bit, and you're, you're, beginning to feel that conscious uh the world of sonic the hedgehog has been thrust into a

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wherever you get your podcasts. When the Chaotic are on the case. Look, there are a lot of celebrity interview podcasts out there, but there's only one Happy, Sad, Confused. I'm Josh Horowitz, and yeah, I'm the host of the show, so I'm a little biased, but truly Happy, Sad, Confused is the place for nerdy and intimate conversations

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I'm going to sink down and I'm going to take my armor off and try to feel the bark beneath my back. Okay, so you turn around, armor off, just wearing your under tunic, and you press your back against the actual tree itself, laying your head against it, and you close your eyes again and begin to concentrate. At this point in the day the sun is crust,

the surface is still hitting you from the side of the tree, so you're not as warm as you were before. And you focus, and you concentrate again on the expanse of this landscape. The strange difference between the warm midday, the cold mornings and evenings, and the freezing nights that bring mists and low clans, and low clouds that shroud white stone in this somewhat middle to northern area of Tal'Dore

itself into the kind of mystic, dark mythology that has encapsulated it since it was first founded. After a while of concentrating and letting your mind wander, your eyes open again, and now you're hitting sunset. It's growing colder. The breeze is picked up a bit. You can see some clouds making their way. slowly from the wind of the southwest, cresting over the mountains on the western side. El Vastro Ceres, no vision, no words, and you can start seeing now people are walking through the street and kind of just watching you strangely as they pass. You hear horse hooves hitting as they pass by with carts and people kind of stop and stare and awkwardly whisper to each other and keep walking. Sucks. Is it anybody around that I know?

Currently no. Good. That's a really stupid right now. I'm gonna try going underneath the tree, where Kielith said, the little tree house was. Okay. So you find your way to the small tunnel that you guys first carved when you arrived in Whitestone from one of the, what was previously an abandoned tavern

that has been reclaimed. And as you enter, you can see now the covered windows have been reopened, and the place, while not a fully functional tavern yet, is in the process of being renovated to start up business again soon. So as you enter the front door, you see about five different carpenters or various workers that are in the process of renovating the interior that all turn.

Can I help you? Oh, yeah. Actually, don't mind me. I just have a tree house to get to and I walk through and go under. Make a persuasion. I don't know, man. It's all right, it's all right. It's all right. It's all right, I don't know.

15. 15, okay, the guy kind of looks to you and goes. I wink at him, keep walking. I mean, I have no idea what that means, but. But you like it. You like it. And I keep going. I'm going to go ahead and send Joseph just to keep an eye. And this one guy turns around.

He looks a little touch. He turns around and just goes, okay, I'll follow her. Joseph, if you could wait at the door, that would be really helpful. I can do that. Thank you. Yeah. I'll wait by the door. Right? Sure, whatever, man. Go for it. It's fine. Let me just go back to fixing up the inside. They're fixing windowsills and Joe, who seems to go a really sweet guy probably in his middle 830s, very shaved head that's just starting to come in a little bit, a square jaw, but it's kind of slingblade style hung off the one side a little. But he seems like he's a fair worker and intent on the job that is set before him.

So as you... Good work, Joseph. Thank you. And he follows you in as you enter the tunnel. He begins to walk in the tunnel with you. At the door. Right, this isn't a door. Ha ha ha ha, all right.

Keep walking. All right. As I go up, I want to put my hands on the roots and I'm gonna say hey Sun Tree I know I can't hear you but I really need your help right now and I hope you can hear me I don't know how to do this exactly but I need to talk to Pelo there's a lot of people that are kind of looking at me like I know what I'm doing but I have no freaking clue so If you could help guide me, great.

I sit down and I just keep my hands on the roots. As you concentrate and keep your hands on the roots, time passes what seems like 10, 20, 30, 60 minutes of silence, occasionally broken by a voice down the whole way going, you okay? Yes. All right. You come back to focusing on the pastest,

get in hand. And at times, you catch yourself, you swear you feel the roots get warmer. And then you conscious of it, and then you kind of feel long, and no, it's probably about the same. You may have psyched yourself out, you're not sure. When you close your eyes again, you focus. And as the boredom instinctively sets in, you have a hard time standing still. You're an individual that likes being bombarded with sensory. elements. You're a person who needs to know what's going on around. You always have been. That sense of self-preservation, paranoia, whatever you want to call it, is being conflicted heavily with the idea of being still, quiet, and focused for a protracted period of time. And you're battling that antsiness. You are far too conscious of your physical body and the discomfort your feeling.

I want you to go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw. you can feel the pain and begin to rise from sitting for so long. Your pelvic bone from just being in that position for a long period of time is beginning to just grow more and more sore. And you begin to kind of shift in place, and as you do, it doesn't help. So you shift again, that doesn't help. In every single position you try and shift, it just seems to just throb and pain from just being stationary for so long in a position that you're not used to. and it's distracting to you. And then eventually a voice comes through down the hallway, he goes, all right, we're done and we're leaving. You good?

Great, Joseph. You know what? What? Thanks. Through everything, have a good night. You too. Okay. You okay there?

Yep, I'm great. You can go. You can go. It's scary. It's not. But don't come down here. Thank you. All right, we'll have a good night, Miss.

Okay. The footsteps just go quieter and quieter, and then as the hatch that led to the basement that you guys carved the tunnel from closes. Is Trinket here with me? Trinit is in your necklace. Pop that fucker out. Very tight space. There's now a big bear, and you're like, Sorry about that.

Are you okay? Are you comfy? Are you all right? Is this too big? Kind of backs up into the tunnel partway and is now, Borderline, we need to poo in the tree. Oh, Trinket's like fitting in there, but snugly, and his, boom. Cat trying to squeeze into the shoebox. How much can you stay still? I'm gonna cast speak with animals.

Okay, okay. Oh, bother. Trinket. I can, I can be still. What? Can you come over here? Oh, I guess. I'm gonna cross forward back into the space. to the space, kind of like ducking his head

under the various tree roots, like, mm. I'm gonna just lay down, dear. I'm just gonna lean on you. I just need you right now. And he kind of, as I'm comfortable the moment it is, he kind of curls up around you and forms this kind of crescent, soft bear barrier, a barrier, if you will. Oh, sorry.

Beautiful. You did that. And you lean back into Trinket, and the warmth is comforting, because it is getting colder here, especially beneath the earth in a space that, aside from the natural earth insulation, the cold of the night of white stone, does get pretty biting.

And so the warmth is welcome. And you think back and you have really no idea what sense of time it is. You really don't. You know how long we've been in here. Could have been minutes, hours. It's hard to tell. It's days down here, Trinket.

We're in prison forever. This fucking title. I thought I wanted it. I thought I did. I did. Trinio goes, really? I know. I don't want to stay here forever.

Well, it's not going to be forever eventually. We'll get sick of it, dear. Okay. And we'll leave. And Trinin kind of falls asleep. I lean back on him and just look up at the roots and say, Oh, hello. You have something to tell me, and I want to hear it.

And I'm getting... I'm tired of being down here, but I swear I'm fine. I'm gonna keep concentrating because I'm committed to you and I'm committed to this hunt, and I'm committed to this title and this city and your tree and your leaves and your trunk and these roots and the dirt around me and all of that. And I'm gonna keep thinking. Okay.

So thinking about this, you're thinking back in the trinket. The warmth is comforting. Make another vision taken, throw. All right. Come on, girl. Get it. Oh, I thought that was a 20, but it's not. Not quite.

15. 15, okay. That's what I do. If you lean back in the shrink it, and you watch this dark in space where there's no light, and so you're relying on your elvish dark vision, your half-elves dark vision, to kind of still take in the space. There's no color, but you can understand the shapes in there,

the shapes of the roots, and what seems like days go by, and your wine wanders to Percival, your mind wanders to, your recent venture in the hells, to Pikes return, to wondering what the hell's scams up to, to what this even means? Was this worth it? Like, what are you gonna do? Stay here?

The whole point of you and your brother was to go and wander and not be behooving to anything, to be free. But then what is freedom at that point? Is it taking responsibility? Your mind just cyclically continues to fold in itself, all these questions and these answers, and then questions to those answers.

And before you begin to realize, is you begin to fall asleep. And you begin, you swear for a moment, you're going to see the roots of the sun tree begin to grow and curl in your direction. And you try and move, but you find yourself unable to, paralyzed against the back of Trinket. And you glance over your shoulder and just look over in.

Trinket isn't, Trinket, Trinket is more roots that are curling around you. There is a clasp of various growing, subterranean plant life that is just beginning to impose in your space. your vision begins to dull to blackness. You watch as the roots reach out and grab around the sides of your head and your neck

and pull you and lift you up, and you start having flashes, memories of the interior of the tree and the Faywild, of the way those roots looked, ever reaching, hungry, trying to grasp whatever life and emotion they can find. And that fear begins to seek up into your throat, but you withstand it.

Your understanding of the importance of this and knowing that this can't be real. You shrug off this vision in spite of the roots bringing darkness to your vision. Everything goes cold and still, and the darkness opens up once more, like your eyes, the lids just fold to reveal a beautiful moonlight dappled,

pristine, glass-like pond in the middle of a deep forest, a very thickly wooded forest with a very, very small series of gaps in the canopy that allow these beams of white moonlight to hit the surface to refract. Still, calm, cold, quiet. A very faint mist has gathered across the surface of this water. Just observe. Timeless. You don't feel yourself breathing, and you feel like I should be breathing in my dead. If I should breathe, that's what it means to live. But you don't sense that experience. And by the time that thought crosses you to the point where you can feel the panic beginning

to brim up in the back of your mind, the water breaks and you watch as a shape emerges from the surface of the water, ripples begin to cascade out from the outside of the shape as it steps one, two, three times bipedal in movement. This large humanoid shape begins to step forth from the water. You see this almost 10-foot-tall humanoid mass begin to step out from the water.

you can see from the glistening liquid that is just coasting off of its back and body, unkept by any fur or flesh, there is a hide, a rhino-like thick gray-scaled almost hide that seems to cover the entirety of its form. But what you see is its back, this massive, muscled shoulder shelf and two tree trunk-like arms that just swing and dangled from the sides as it begins to step further and further out of this pond. And at first you see this creature, but you still sense it belonging. And then you sense that this is a reason for this emergence. And at that point you watch as the creature, which is now maybe up to its waist, pushing onto knee, depth in the water as it reaches the edge, the surface. You don't see its face. You just see over its shoulder and it's massive back, no head emerging over top.

emerging over top, it stops and turns back. And as the shoulder turns, you can see the head, which is actually protruding forward out of the torso. The slumped, plated, armored head with a jaw that hinges underneath, closed, with a series of teeth in the bottom. And what you see for just a glimmer are its yellow eyes glowing, all six of them in rows of two across the top

as it glances back in your direction. And it just leaps. out of the water and begins darting through trees and vanishing in the distance. And you realize the hunt is on. Oh my God. Your vision comes back to you. There's no vines. And Trinket is just sleeping behind you. And you're there in the cold darkness beneath the Suntree. What do you do? Awesome. Sun Tree. You're the best pet or that is some fucked up shit. Okay.

Uh, Drink it. Wake up. We have to go hunt a thing. That looks really scary. I'm gonna die. How about you? Um, hopefully not. Good call, let's go. Okay. Oh, fuck. Get it girl.

So what are you doing? Do I just fucking go straight forward? Get a girl. What are you doing? What are you doing? Get a girl. I don't know. I don't know how to go find like the lake that he came out of.

You are. You're the best. You're a ranger. Millet. Do I remember what it? It's really fast. It was going through the trees. Do I remember a specific look? Do I remember hearing about a lake in the woods? You remember seeing it as it left, you took a very quick glimpse at its shape, at its feet, as its giant clawed fingers. It's humanoid-like hands. You don't know of a scent per se. Go ahead and roll an investigation check. Okay, I definitely put...

Look back over the memory of what you have and to pick out details. My armor back on. Mm-hmm. So you're putting on your armor as you're rushing out of the area. What am I rolling? Investigation. I'm rolling really great tonight. You're a rolling dog shit tonight.

Which is great, 11. 11, okay. Best you can tell, given the circumstances, the brief vision you had, the angle of the moon beams are coming from the right and left, meaning they're, like, from your perspective, they're coming at this angle upon the water. And as you step out into the night,

you can see the moon is in a certain place, in the sky where you envision, if that is in... But turn that way, it'll be coming at me this way. Depending on if it's a northern direction or not. So you're trying to think of where the lake was. There are a couple of ponds that you've seen in the forest. You're not fully aware. Percival might be the person to ask about this. Okay, I'm gonna run to Percy.

Do I need to... Ooh, am I allowed to ask him? I'm gonna run to Percy. Okay, Percival. You've kind of been hoping that everything worked out. Okay, you haven't heard anything from Vexali since the morning. since the morning. She's been gone for a good 13 hours at this point, and it's close to midnight. Whoa. At least I got some sleep.

I'm a little bit. I'm in my study working on things. And you're in the process of going through books and session, all of a sudden there's a rush of footsteps and Vick Sahlia comes bursting into your room. I have a vision. Excellent! Excellent! Yeah! It looks really, really scary, though.

So thank you. I'm so sorry and excited. Okay, I have a question. Yes. I saw a lake, a glade. Do you know of any? She describes the pond. It's a smallish pond.

I just have a map in my study, and I just pull it out and just hand it. I must have a map. You do, you do. You do. Do you know of anything that's big and tall, like around 10 feet, has six eyes going straight down in a row, like in pairs, and then it's like really thick,

hide skin, like, legs like trunks. Drog when I'm drunk. Well. Do I know anything? This is not your specialty. You haven't dealt with the Greyhunt personally, and this is not ringing a bell.

Is it usually different creatures? It's different every time. Okay. Hey, do you remember when we were coming here and we were camping out in the woods outside? And there was a woman, I think, that walked by with a pack of, was it, Yes.

Did they have anything to do with this? I don't know. Great. Just wondering. Just thought of it. Okay. I might see you later. And I go. As you dart out, Trinket lumbering after you,

you look at the map and based on the conversation you had as well, there are two different locations that have ponds roughly the size of the size of the map. roughly the size that your vision revealed to you. Both of them have a slight break in the canopy. So that's the key that you remember from this, and being a tracker specifically, you know that they're, most of the forest, the part of it itself, is a very dense canopy,

and it rarely has breaks enough to allow that much moonlight to pass through. I need you go ahead and make an intelligence check. Okay. Well, good, all right? Stop rolling like shit, all right. All right. Oh, God, I thought that was at a one.

Investigation, 24. Yeah. Yeah. There's an intelligence check, so you should add your intelligence modifier. Aw. A-hm. An intelligence check would be 19. That's still very good.

Ascertain between the two locations and the map, the one that would contain both the right amount of canopy that would be open. The size of the pond and the location of the moon would be far, far west of White Stones, slightly north, beginning to just get near to where the Alabaster Sierra Mountain Range hits the bottom of the valley. So you know that's probably your best bet to get there.

I hop on Trinkets back and we take off. You leap on to the back of your bear. And goes into a full sprint out of the city. From a few folks that are in the middle of the, you know, kind of drunkenly wandering through the city or in the process of making their way home, they all step aside as Vexalia, Lady Vexallia of the Greyhunt. On top of Trinket, the bear,

comes tearing through Whitestone to the west, bearing towards the gap in the exterior wall of the city, and charging into the depth of the Parchwood forest. Following the map and keeping tabs on direction, about 40 minutes or so of travel you eventually come upon where you think this pond should be, this pond. Go ahead and roll a tracking. This would be survival with advantage.

Oh yeah, because this is my favorite terrain. Yes. Same thing, both times. Double 14. So 22. 22. You make your way in new. When you find the pond and you recognize it exactly.

The moment you get there, this is exactly the pawn in your vision. This is very much. And you glance over and start finding your way around the edge, and eventually you find the thick, heavy foot folds right beneath the water. Because he left straight out of the water, so there were no tracks directly out of, but you look just beneath the surface.

I remember him jumping into the trees. Yes, and you look up and you can see a few branches are broken. Then you begin to trace the direction of where it went. I cast past another trace on myself. Okay. And I'm going to stealth after it. All right, go ahead and roll a self-check. Yes.

Keep thinking. I'm gonna put him in the locket for the time. Okay, chriggins goes into the necklace. Go ahead and roll stealth with your pass-out-trace bonus. Oh, right. Ah-ha. 33. 33? Okay.

Very quietly, you dart up into the trees and begin leaping from broken branch to broken branch. Eventually it leads you into a small opening between a series. The trees are extremely thick, but there are certain areas where they begin to separate a bit. And you can see heavy impacts, where it leapt down and found some soft ground and begins running.

You can see the tracks, and you take a moment and study these tracks, and you can see exactly how these thick, three-toed feet of the creature dig into the dirt, and you take a very, very close watch on that. I need you to go ahead and make another Wisdom's arrival check to see where those footfalls will take you. So again, a 24.

24, okay. Oh, wait, 22. 22. Okay. So you begin darting through, and you notice there are points where it leaps into the trees and vanishes, the trail stops, but you can follow the brief bits of foot. This creature is heavy. You can see it doesn't leap up into the boughs and hang on a branch.

It leaps up onto an actual tree trunk and then leaps off the trunk, off the trunk and where it does, the bark splinters and breaks. Whatever this is, it's extremely dense. It's extremely heavy. And to have the power and strength to lift its form on that thickness means it has some power behind it. Continuing to keep tabs, you're darting through the dark woods. Out of the right of view, you hear a sudden noise and you are surprised as a series of birds come just fluttering past you. Apparently startled for something nearby and you watch as a forest elk kind of darts past, and is a sign of, you know, naturally, in this environment, of relatively recent movement. And you get the sense that you might be gaining

on this creature, whatever it's charging. Oh my God, oh my God. So as you're leaping and running and making the best possible path you can, eventually the trail begins to grow a little cold and you find a small glade. A small pyrn. Yeah, I know. About three, I'll say, about about about about about about, about, about a small glade. About 30 feet across, the trees just kind of open and there's the space and it's pristine, untouched,

and the trail ends entirely. Yeah, what does that mean? Sealing. Yeah, can I look up? I mean. Make reception trinket. You're making me chew my nails. It's a great, it's an open grade, you said?

It's a clearing in the forest where the canopy opens a little bit and there's just thick brush. You can see some of the roots in the nearby trees kind of pop up in places, but it's, as opposed to previously where the trees are pretty clustered together and you're kind of finding your way through the slight gaps, this area is open by about 30 feet. Oh, well, okay.

And it's okay, I get advantage because that's my favorite terrain. Thank, crappers. That's caught. I can say that's a four, though. It's cocked. It's caught. Go again. Go again with your.

The rules if you can balance and die on top of it. That's worse. Oh my gosh. That's worse. One of two. Oh, no. But my perception is 13, so that's 15 for perception. That's great.

That's great, because you're badass. Wow. Wow. Really? Really, you dicks? Why are you betraying me in this moment that I need you the most? There are 40 kids at one moment. So, as you reach this clearing, you glance about, and it appears to be empty.

There's nothing here. There's no sign. You can attempt to find tracks if you'd like. But I'd have to like come down on the ground. You're currently up in the tree, yeah, so. I'm still stealth, though. You are. I'm gonna align down the tree.

Okay. You find your way stepping onto the somewhat soft floor of the forest. Oh, that's actually really good. I'm gonna take a minute. And I'm gonna, I don't know what kind of creature it is, though. I don't know if I can use my prime evil awareness.

Well, you can certainly try. I'm gonna try my prime evil awareness. Okay, and what are you concentrating on? Maybe. Durduckin. I've got aberrations. He's not a celestial, probably. He didn't seem like an elemental.

So I've got fiends. Those are guys that come from. That's where we just were. Yeah, the hells. I've got aberrations. Possible. Faye. I'm gonna go aberrations.

Do I have to choose one? Yeah. Amorations or what, like a beholder? Grody thing. Yeah, things that generally come from some touch of the far realm. I'm gonna focus on that. Okay. As you sit there in focus, you're using just a level one?

Yeah, so it's within a mile of me. You quietly focus and concentrate. Oh, up to six within my favorite terrain. Sure, all right. You sense no nearby aberrations. Okay, can I take another second and think about fiends? Fiends, no, no, Faye. Okay, you concentrate on Faye?

Nothing. Gosh, darn it. Is there nothing in my primal awareness? Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. What are you doing, Vexelli? Come on, La. I'm gonna see if I can find any tracks. Okay, make a survival check with advantage.

Oh, La. Oh, wow. Did it, did it. Oh, but that's cocked. It's cocked, but it's a 20, It's cocked, it's cocked, it's cocked, it's cocked, it's cocked. Kyle's a guy. Okay, that's still good, that's still good.

Okay, 24. 24, okay, and also if you could roll stealth again, since you are actively doing something. Yeah, that... I roll twice, because... Do I roll twice? No, you just roll. 32.

Oh, it's just 32, huh? Okay. You step out into the shadow, using the edges of it, and you do see the very, very faint trail, trail, not of feet on the ground, but of claw marks. Just very carefully placed, almost like it was like monkey walked along the sides of this glade. And the tracks and the claw marks stop in this small cluster of bushes where inside you can just barely see the faintest hidden glow of six tiny yellow dots.

Is it looking at me? It's hard to tell the direction. Take out an arrow. I are a bramble shot at the eyes. And I'm a sharpshooter. You are. Okay, sharpshooters. Minus 5 to hit. Plus 10 to damage, go for it. Oh, but I mean I don't take, I mean I get no.

She doesn't have to do that. She can't. Just ignore cover. Three quarter. Oh, I see, I see. So yeah, you can do that. Okay. Sniper, starring Willie Zane. Oh.

You can hide out towards, right? Oh shit, the tiny trees have come out. Oh, I could if I didn't put my hunter's mark on it, but I'm gonna hunter's mark him before I do that. Okay. Hunter's mark. Hunter's mark. Hunter's mark.

Oh, breaking out the foliage. The general circle here. It's a circle of trees. I did not have the actual mini-frey. This is working for, but I'll give you the idea. This size. Oh my god, look at that. Where is he? Oh, he's huge. Maybe this was a mistake. I should have talked to him.

No, man. You got it. I should have. No. I'm trying to bramble shot him so that I can, you know. You got this. You got this. Okay, we'll put that there. All he speaks is fucking wood up. All right. So. And wait, before I did that, I get my broom ready. And then I'm going to do what I do.

Okay, you get your broom ever so carefully ready. I'm going to be slowly. You hunter's mind. Hunters mark him. Like that guy when he's unloading the shotgun in Jurassic Park. Yeah, clever. Yeah, clever. Oh, no, is that what this is going to be?

All righty. Hunter's marked, and you're taking a ramble shot. Yes, and I got 29. 29, that hits. And what's the saving throw on that? Oh, DC-17. That is a 20. Sorry.

He is not restrained, but he does take an additional 48 of damage. Yep. Whoa. Which is rat her. Okay. Raher. Raher.

10, 15. Yep, yep. 21 bramble shot damage. Nice. Dorns, thorns. Yes, yes. 10, 11, 12. 12.

13, 14. This was this a sweet. Was this? surprise attack? Yes. So isn't that an automatic crit as an assassin? Yeah, because you're an assassin. It is. So with all the dice involved there, that's 21 times 2, that's 42. Plus your actual arrow, which is what do you roll for the arrow? The, plus the what? What's the actual just arrow damage?

Arrow damage was two. Lightning damage was two. Okay, so that's eight plus whatever your modifier is. One for Hunter's Mark. And then I get a sneakie attack on him too. Yep, so it's... And then four for that. Nice. That is 56 points of damage in one head. Plus the eight, plus ten additional for the eight and the two for the bracers. Right, right. Whoa.

Never mind, that's 66 points of damage. Six fucking hunter. As you pull back and carefully aim, the air just disappears and you watch as the, there's a flash of green energy, the arrow impacting on this creature. And the vines, Khorangu hero. and the bushes just explode as this entity steps out, just tearing the binds off of its body, throwing them to the ground as they kind of shrivel and shake and then turn to dust and dissipate into the underbrush.

As the creature steps out and looks directly at you, its six glowing eyes in a three-by-three pattern like that, staring right at you, the arcing of the energy kind of finishing throughout its body, it stands, upright for a moment almost. Its hunched form goes almost more humanoid, and it looks at you with an intelligence you didn't expect. Oh shit.

And it takes a step and another step and seems to almost give you a nod of respect. Roll initiative. Oh! Oh! Oh, I get it's a dragon. Only ten. Wait, do I get to roll twice because I'm in my favorite terrain?

All right, you call in this favorite terrain thing a lot. Let me see what it actually helps. There are specifics to what your favorite terrain is ate. Do I auto kill it because of favorite terrain? Do I win Natives and Dragons? Do I win? Do I win Dungeons and Dragons? The Conjunctions and Dragons is my favorite terrain.

It all makes sense now. Sweetest. I should really be rolling better in Taverns. Ooh. Tavern's favorite terrain is kind of genius. That actually is genius. That is really genius. You can have urban settings as your favorite terrain.

Settings has your favorite terrain. Yeah, you can't have urban settings. Nope, it just means that your intelligence and wisdom checks related to the terrain are... Uble yet. Your purchasees doubleed. So technically not even advantage, but it's still, it's fine. Oh, okay. But yeah, no, you're not going to benefit for that.

So would you roll for... It's 10 for initiative. Total initiative of 10? I know, okay, Matthew. There's only two people. That is just under average. So, the, it is now the creature's turn. Great!

That's not a good thing. All right, five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five, thirty-five. It comes rushing up to you, swings one of its fists towards you, and it's gonna, its finger, it comes back as a fist and the claws open right as it comes in your direction. The first attack, don't die. That is a twenty-four to hit. That hits me. All righty, you suffer from the first claw strike. Oh no. 17 points of slashing damage. Okay.

As soon as that claw straight comes by, it brings its second claw upward in an uppercut arc. That is going to be a natural 20. Damn it. Whoa. Oh. Damn it. That is 28 points of slashing damage.

Oh. Jesus. And then it's going to attempt to bite you. Watch now it's jaw. This like snubbed crocodile like jaw kind of unhinges and opens up. with these natural, kind of spiked teeth on each top and bottom side's gonna go and reach out towards you.

And that is a 15. That doesn't hit me. So it goes to bite towards you, and after the first two strikes hit you, you duck out of the way and you hear him snatch together over top, making a horrible clenching noise, but you are not in the jaws when they close. And as you look up, as you duck down,

it kind of pulls back and like in a, what have you got type expression? What are you doing? Okay, I'm gonna pop Trinket out. Okay. Where? Behind him. Trinket, watch this tiny arc of black energy. Arp over, and you swear you see to the eyes,

even though there is no visible Irish, just kind of follow the immediate motion as the rest they focused on you. And then Trinket appears behind it. I'm gonna disengage. Okay, is your bonus? And bamf up into the sky on my broom. Alrighty. How high up you going, full movement? What is that, 30?

That is 30, yes. Yeah, but I want to just get up to a tree that's far away from him. Okay. I don't want to like hang out on the broom. I just want to be like high enough that he can't jump up to me right away. You know what I mean?

Yep, so you were right up there. Okay. And then I want to get, like, brace myself at a tree. So if I fell off the broom, I wouldn't fall onto the ground. I would like land. So full movement would be about 20 feet up and 10 feet back? Yeah, sure. Okay, so you would be about there and you'd be a little bit lower. We'll save for the purposes of this, since that direction does matter.

It's the best. All right, so you're back over here. Got it. Yeah. Right up against this tree. All right, so that's your bonus action, that's your movement. What else you doing? Yes.

I am, he can jump really far, I know. Up, go up. Okay, I'm going to, I'm gonna shoot him. Okay. Twice. Whoa. Borellis.

But through my blazing bowstring. Okay. Okay. Okay. How did I call? You just got parellicized. Waitress. Waitress.

Okay, 25 for the first. That hits. Awesome. Okay. This is five plus eight is 13. All right. Plus four for Hunter's Mark. Plus three for sneak attack. Plus four lightning damage.

24 damage. Plus two for the bracers, so 26 damage. On the first, oh wait, plus the Blazing Boastring, which is another seven. Nice! That's fire damage. Your hardest mark is in there all right. And my hunter's spark is in there. And then I'm gonna try to do it again.

Herda-da-da-da-dur-da-dur-dur. That's fucking cacked. You fucking cacted. Uh, 28. 28 does hit? Oh my god. Oh my god, okay. 16, 17, 18.

You got there is some cact diced. 18 for the arrow. Plus three lightning damage. Plus six for the hunters, Mark. And I don't get another sneak attack. No, just once per round. Blazing. And the blazing bowstring is another seven.

Five damage. Nice, three. Six to seven total damage. That's not fucking bad. That's not a fucking bad. I'm sure the thing is on the verge of death. All righty. No.

No, I'm sure it's not. It's a big. All right. All I'm going to do is go, yeah, all I'm going to do is go, you know, you seem like a nice guy. I hate to kill you. We're saying such comments.

I don't speak English. He doesn't get entirely fighting. The creatures are, like it kind of glances over, Trinquet behind, just kind of looks up at you and the tree and kind of seems to in a creepily humanoid way, kind of wipe the edge of its jaw, and then leap off this tree. Trinke gets a swipe at him. Yes, it does.

And then leap in your direction from the sky. I'm gonna react to arms out, jaw open. So go ahead and make the attack for Trinket. He's a sater. I think he likes me, y'all. What is it, a bite attack or a claw attack? Does it matter? Whichever one you want.

A bite attack, then. All righty. That is, what is it this one? Yeah. 12 plus 9. 21. That hits. Going to roll damage for Trinket. Where's my six?

Where's my six? That yellow one. Back. Thank you. How's my heart. Nine. Nine. Nine points damage from Trinket.

Nice. It leaps in the air, arms out, jaw open towards you. It's going to go ahead and make a bite attack towards you. Okay. That is a 23 to hit. That hits me, motherfucker. All righty. You suffer 19 points of piercing damage. Okay. And I need you to make an athletics or acrobatics check. Oh shit. Great. That is 34. 34. The jaw attempts to pull you from the... the broom, the strength of its grasp on you is extremely heavy. You sense it, this is a

grapple wren technique it has. However, you manage to just squeeze out of its teeth and elbow it as you push it off with your foot, releasing your grasp. You're not grappled by the creature. However, on its way down, it's going to swing out with its claws as you push it off. It's a natural one. Two natural ones in a row. Are you fucking kidding? He falls that ground and he hurts himself. He definitely plummets. He falls on the dick. He falls on his feet.

We'll say for the purposes of this, sure. As he lands into the tree, the tree and he gets up and slams down. And as he impacts, as he hits the ground and slams, you can see the dirt is displaced from impact. This creature is extremely heavy and dense. Now seeing it right in front of your face to the point where it's tumbling impact pushed a tree over.

in the middle of the forest. Fuck. That's the end of its turn. You're up. Okay. Two ones in a row. I believe that. You give her?

No, dies down. No, this is my go-to die. It's the fan-given die. I use this for everything. I know, I know, I'm gonna, I'm gonna do something. It's all random. It's all, this is all fucking concentration, so I can't do shit. This is crazy.

So I'm just gonna go up higher. Okay. Higher. I'm gonna hope. that I'm going out of his range. You're going full up? Yeah. All right, we'll say, going 30 feet up.

Where you were, you were up in this direction there. Okay, and I'm gonna shoot him. I'm gonna shoot him. Go for it. I'm gonna shoot him twice. I'm gonna get higher, I'm gonna shoot him. I'm gonna shoot him. 19 does it, yes.

Yes! Yes! Okay, that's six. Plus I'm 14, 15, 16, 16 plus two lightning damage, plus my one for Hunter's mark. But I do get a sneak attack because Trink is next to him, right? Well, I run Trinket up to him. How about that?

I run Trinkin' up to him, but. So what's six for the sneak attack? Sixth of the sneak attack, all I got it. Is he prone? Nope. Okay. I'm gonna for my bonus action have Trinket attack him with a bite of.

attack before I send off my second era. Go for it. A little bit. You need you to roll concentration check, by the way, for your Hendress mark, because you took damage. Oh. Each of those hits, you gotta remember that. So just roll a constitution saving throne. 12. 12? It would have been, that's fine with the first one. Roll again. That's not 12. What's that one? That's lower. That's four. Four, yeah. So hunter's mark, actually that last Hunter's mark would not have... That's okay, it was just one anyway. Yeah, but that would be more. So, we gotta remember that. Okay.

Okay. I don't do that very often. I know. It's okay. Trinkets attack was 24. 24 hits. Okay. So that's 12 for him.

Okay. And then I'm going to do my second attack. All righty. And that is a 20 something. That hits, yeah. Okay, okay, okay. I hope he can't get up this height. 10, 11, 12.

plus four lightning damage. And no sneak attack. Nope. So as the arrows, they're sitting through the hide, the height is very thick, but you're seeing the impact hitting in this, you can see the dark trails of blood just slowly dripping from each of these wounds so the arrows plugged the hole.

But they're all sticking in, they're all staying in need. Just seeing out this pin cushion of a chest now as each arrow stays protruding from the front of this creature. It's like thick gray hide, the yellow eye still glaring at you. You can see as it looks around, there's a little It's glancing in the vicinity for what it can do. Any of your turn? I say, so I mean, what are you doing out here?

Do you like work for Pelo? Is this like a thing you do all the time? Ask her name. What's your sign? As you're saying this, you watch the creatures. The trinkets like kind of hassling it from the back. It kind of like pushes off. Looks over, grabs the tree that just fell.

Oh, Jesus. and throws it in your direction, which it makes a strength check to do so. Oh shit. That is a 21 to hit. Oh, no. Son of a gurn. I hit. Okay.

You want to fire. I know. I'm going to die. I'm going to fall and die if I get knocked off this fec and broom. Okay. You take my sister in the woods. 17 points of bludgeoning damage as the tree strikes you. I'm gonna wait a long. Nightmare on Elham Street. Oh.

I need you to go ahead. I should have had a feast or something before. I should have talked to you and had you inspire me. Oh man, I should have would have got a... Yeah. I should have thought of these things. I was real excited about going and hunting things. So the tree impacts you, it's threatening to knock you off the broom.

Even though it'll remain attached to you. I need you to go ahead. Oh man, this would be an interesting DC. Because it, hmm. Make a string check to hold yourself on the broom. Strength check? Yeah, this is to see from the impact you can still hold onto the broom

or be knocked from it. Natural 20. Or strength saving throughout is what it would be. Do it right now. It's not a 20, that's a 10. That's a 10. You are thrown from the broom from the impact and immediately tumble.

To the tree, to the tree that fell? To another tree. To another tree, because it hit me and it like, and kind of change the trajectory. Okay, so you hit a series of branches in the way down. Trigigick gets you. Trin sees it happen. He runs over and he saves me and everything's fine.

And I'm still in cradish. So as you plummet, the broom as you're not on it goes limp and you just tumble as it's currently dangling from the chain that's attached to you. Can I think to grab it as I'm falling? Unfortunately no. Character development. You land prone on the ground and suffer.

15 points of bludgeoning damage. Oh, okay. You got a potion? She can, like, heal herself on a good day. She better now. It takes a step forward. Trinke does get an attack of opportunity. It gets to attack again, even though it threw something? No, it just moves up to you.

It's now looming over you, threatening. That was its full action with throwing the truth. He needs to do a Yeager shot right now. Trig got a natural 20. Yes! Nice! Good. The Mall of Trike. Oh my God, and you know what, I just remembered he rolled, it doesn't matter. He gets a crit on 19s before and he got a 19th. Whatever. Now you know. Triple the dice. Okay, so that's a bite attack.

Triple the dice? No, he's fucking weird. Damn. Oh, I was real excited. It's really quite stressful. 16. 16, nice. But doubled? Yeah, that's double. Yeah, that's double. He's a biting. Look, it's awesome. He's a bear. He's a bear. So as he lashes out and gets a big chunk, you see like, he goes,

and steps up and is now looming over you. Thanks, buddy. Now in the darkness, as you look up from the impact, your eyes open, and all you see is this outline, the moonlight hitting the back of this creature, kind of just giving the shape, the white line of its giant shoulders and muscular chest, and the six glowing eye staring down,

and it looms. Your turn. I say, why are we doing this? Why are we even fighting? Is this a thing? Should we talk about this? Are you trying to talk to it? Yeah.

It turns over. No, dude, would that use my whole turn to try to talk to him? As I, like, disengage, can I try to stand up? If you're making quips, that's fine, but if you're, like, trying to actually, like, converse with and get through to a creature, that'll be your action. Oh, fuck balls. Are you Peter Parkering? No. That's a bad idea.

What do you do in Vicksal? Okay, I can't, I roll out of the way of him, right? Because he's, like, looming over me. He's looming over. You're prone? on the ground next door. Can I disengage out of this? So you disengage as a bonus action, and you can move three squares away. Great, cool.

You get up, there you go. How the fuck, um, what the fuck am I gonna do? Poghosh and Maroon, you got this. You have your action still. What are you doing? I mean, I used a bonus action to disengage, so I can't take a healing potion. Correct. Got your act?

Is it the broom still, or is the broom? The broom is attached, it's like dragging behind me. He's dragging behind her by the ankle. Action plus movement, you can like double movement. You can like double movement. away. Or you can... You can use your action to heal.

Away from this motherfucker. Yeah, but then he'll just attack me again. How high can you go? I'm gonna shoot him. Oh, shit. I'm gonna commit. Okay. I'm gonna shoot him twice as I'm like staring at him.

Okay. Say this is not the kind of hot that I'm used to. And try to shoot him. Can you, anything to knock him prone or anything? I mean, I guess I don't have any kind of concentration up anymore because I got fucking destroyed. fucking destroyed. Correct. You have destroyed dragons, tree men.

These are all bonus though. It really, I can't do shit. I kind of suck. Fenthris, can't Fenthris do something? Venthris can do. Rambles is out, which I already did. 17. 17 just barely hits.

Oh. Misses or hits? Just really hits. Killit. Okay. Okay. Durd-da-durdis. Okay, 10.

11, 12. 12 plus 1, lightning. Lightning damage. Trinket ran up, as I was saying that. Plus two sneak attack. Okay. Shinket's gonna run up and take a swipe while I'm doing this. Go for it. Oh wait, no. I use my bonus action disengaged. Trinket can't do that. Correct, yes. You only get your two attacks. Great. Okay. 29. 29 hits. This is a bad. This is bad. This bad. This bad guys. Super bad. It's good. 14, 15. 16. Oh, no, that doesn't count. 16. Plus two lightning damage. Is 18? 18 points of damage. All right, you watch all these arrows, soo-soo-shing into its body, its abdomen, its knee, and one of the knees kind of buckles a little bit. It's like, you can see now, it's visibly hurt. Like, it's bleeding from a lot of places.

And as it stands back up, its knee shakes from the impact. And as its knee locks into place, the arrow that you just shot snaps from the hide clicking together. I'm just then just put my arms down and stare at him. And you stare at as it just looms towards you. And as it gets stepping up to you now, At your standing position, it's a good four feet taller than you. Tringya gets another attack of opportunity as it moves towards you. And I've been focusing on your... How do you want to do this? Double credit. Sixteen. Sixteen just misses. Trigget swipes in, it hits the back, but just skids off the hide, leaving these scratch marks, but no real damage.

As it just kind of looms forward, it's going to go ahead and take its multi-attack on you. It just kind of looks at you and goes, you hear its knuckles crack. You stick. As it brings its fists in a giant angry punches and swings the first claw towards you. That is a four plus nine. Thirteen. Misses you. To cock. That is an eight plus nine.

That is 17. Doesn't hit! Oh, God. The bite attack. That is a 27. That definitely. Okay. Dodge, dodge, dodge.

You're all right. I can't watch. I can't watch you. I don't have uncanny dodge yet. That's level five, seven or something. 14 points of piercing damage. I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive. Wait, is that true?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I need you to make another athletics or acrobatics check, as its jaw is now clamping on you to grapple you. Oh, okay, okay. 18, 14, yeah. Oh, this guy cannot roll for shit when it comes. It's okay. Neither can I. There you go.

So the jaws clamp on you and you just muscle and squeeze out. You can feel the teeth kind of tear against your flesh between the bits of your leather armor. As you pull away, the armor kind of snaps open and it hinges and you now have your bloodied shoulder exposed in the moonlight right now in the canopy as it's there. You're heaving. It's kind of heaving. Staring you down. What are you going to do? It's your turn. I'm going to have Trinket run up. And I'm gonna fucking A, have to disengage and run the fuck away, because that's all I can do.

I'm gonna disengage and run in like, as far towards that tree circle as I can. So, disengaged, you can go around. Okay. If I'm 30, that's where you can get right there. Yeah, so I'm a trinkin in front of me, and then I'm gonna take two more shots at it. Okay, go for it.

Zip, sit, do or die. Finish it. Finish it. Or die. Dice. I know. I'm going to die if I don't do this. Okay, that hits.

That hits. That's 28. Okay. Okay. One. 12. 13. 14.

14. 15. 16. Two for lightning damage. And then six for the sneak attack. All right. Nice. Nice.

How do you want to do this? Yes. The creature is a good. The creature is wounded, it's breathing heavy, it's standing there, and as you rush past, it kind of turns around and stands tall again, kind of looking back at you as you have the arrow in your sights and you release the arrow is, what do you want to do? I don't want to be fatal. Oh, okay. So what are you doing with the arrow then? You hit him with the feather end? Just the feather head.

I'm going to get him like in the shoulder like up here. Okay, so the arrow, as you release it, it hits right below kind of where a clavicle would be, and it sinks in deep. It goes in probably a good five, six, deeper than any other arrow that you've hit it with is done. And it sinks, and you can just see that stops at the feathers of the chest, and it gives that a and falls back to its one knee that it was on, falls under its second knee, and its arms kind of lean forward, barely keeping itself up like a gorilla. It's just... Shrinket is standing right in front of him, eyeing him down. And I say, you're a noble,

You're a creature. Sent here for a reason. Yes? There's very little response. It's just kind of saying, I'm looking at you. You can see the eyes are focused on you, even through just this glimmers of yellow, even though some of them are lulling and blinking.

Its muscles are tensing and relaxing, as it's just taking all of its strength to stay partially standing at this moment, but it's listening. You can leave. You can go back to where you came I protect this forest now. This is mine. Make just a straight charisma rule. Just adding your charisma modifier.

I'm scared of all my dice right now. Use me out. Oh, good. I know, right? Straight charisma. Seven. I know, right? I don't add. It's not a saving throw. It's just a check.

It's just a check, yeah. I'm a throw up. It stands up. up, and almost falls again onto its knee, grasps, and just kind of puts his arm over where the last arrow went in. It is. Turns around and leaps back into the forest. It can leap? No, it leaves. I take the final arrow before it gets away. Okay, go ahead and fire.

18. That hits, go to the language. I'm going to throw up. Sorry, this is so late, guys. 15, 16, 17, plus two lightning damage. As it leaps in the air, you just barely see the shadow disappearing into the canopy. You take your final arrow and let loose. How do you want to do this? Just right between the shoulder blades.

It hits. You think it hit. You don't hear anything. Quiet. And then the heaviest, boulder-like impact of its body, under the forest grounds, skidding into the mud, hitting another tree. That tree falls on top, and you have to kind of dodge out of the side to make sure that nothing else falls in the area. Then stillness and calm, quiet hits. And the cold finally comes in as the blood is pumping and the adrenaline is hitting you. You felt so warm and you're sweating. At that point, as you're breathing in heavily, you feel the biting cold of the air hitting your lungs.

And at that point, the adrenaline gets to subside and you notice your breath is showing up. and it is a very cold, low mist night now emerging within the forest. I walk up and I scratch trinket on the head. Mm-hmm. You did real good that, but. We're not dead. Mm-hmm.

And I cast care wounds on myself. All right. And then I walk over and try to find a fucking trophy on this guy. Okay, you walk over and you find, indeed, the creature is laid out. It is dead. It is cold. The arrows sticking out of the back,

The final blow seems to have hit a very core nerve center of its back. So carve whatever trophy you wish of its body. I'm just going to cut his, like, hand off. Okay, so you're taking, you eventually pull out a dull dagger and just, you're going to cut his hand off. It takes you a little while, but you do manage to get it. The hand alone probably weighs almost as much as you do. Jeez.

This is big as an ostrich. This was maybe the wrong sort of trophy you grab it, okay. Trinket walks over and takes up and his jaw at. Wow. You're really strong. Did you know that? You're gonna. And I guess I'm gonna, you don't have to carry it just yet, because I want to set fire to the body and burn it.

Okay. I'll use some of the branches from the trees he fucking knocked over to set a fire around. Okay, you do notice that because this area is very thickly wooded, setting a fire in the middle, the parched wood forest, probably not a good idea. Well, I'm gonna do it in the opening right there. Look at that.

I guess I can't because... You try and tug the creature, and even with the trinkets help, This thing weighs like two tons. I feel like, as a hunter, I would know how to like set a fire to something without setting fucking fire to trees. I'm good at camp fire. Make a wisdom survival check. No advantage on this one. You would have disadvantage, so it's negating it.

This is survival. This is survival? 18. 18. It takes you the better part of the evening, but you managed to set a very localized flame around this. Making sure you get you. We have very, very damp moss and bits of wet mud caked around to make sure that the flame doesn't spread. Eventually, the body does begin to burn. And by the time you finish and you feel

successful, you notice the faint glimmer of morning sun beginning to crest over the mountain. I bet everyone thinks we're dead. Hey, Pelo. Pelo. I don't know if I'm saying your name wrong. Thanks for that. And I'll be here next time you send something. My way. It's a bruised, beaten, you and Trinket find your way back to White Stone. You stumble up just as everyone's kind of come into conscience, the worrying has kept you up, and you've been... I've known that the necklace hasn't gone.

No. And eventually, as you guys are getting breakfast and discussing if anyone had seen you, you watch as Vixalia stumbles in, bloodied, bruised, filthy, and Trinket stumbles in. stumbles in beneath and just kind of chucks this giant gray, severed hand of a creature pf under the ground. And she's great with money and, oh look, she's back. Oh, you look awesome. I mean, you look like shit, but you look awesome.

Who has the mimosa? We all gear. You look great, that thing looks so heavy. It's so heavy, I couldn't pick it up. What did that belong to? It was this big, like, weird rhino-y thing with like six eyes. And I tried to talk to him, but he just didn't want to listen.

And I swear he almost fucking killed me. And did you have his own to him? I mean, yeah. Big rhinole thing with six eyes? I said, bye, it's for you, bye. Sure, you've read around. My rolling. This would be a general intelligence check.

Just a general intelligence set? I read around. 23. 23. As soon as she says that, And you're like, this is a gray render. You killed a gray render. Wait, I asked you, I asked you before I left.

Do you know of anything that's gray with like six eyes and you didn't know? Now you know. Seeing the hand kind of triggered it. There's a surprising number of things with six eyes. And that's, that's, that's, that's interesting. Wait, he was really, really tough to go, guys. I mean, if I would have been there together,

like, no problem, like, insta death. What you know of Greywriters is they are asexual creatures that reproduce only one asexually per generation. They are territorial and very protective of their young, and generally sometimes bind themselves as a protector of a certain territory. And given certain circumstances, can

either an individual or a space to protect as well. But that can depend on circumstances. Otherwise, they can be a dangerous force of nature. Wait, does that mean it was a good guy? Did I kill a good thing? That means it was natural. It didn't have a good or bad aspect to it. Does that mean it's got like a baby somewhere in the woods?

And I just didn't know about it. Maybe. That means that you were sent and that you did what you thought was right. This thing could have been a terrible danger. Don't second guess yourself. You're alive. You're doing good. Yeah.

Plus it's kind of cool that you killed something called a gray renter to become the lady. A gray hunts. Totally. Hey, that makes sense. Yes, that is a thing. And you did it by yourself. Yeah, I'm a throw up. No, I'm okay.

No, I'm going to throw up. No. I'm good. I'm just gonna drink my own myself. Just to keep going. Okay. I need to sleep. It's been a while.

I'm gonna go lay down. I love you guys. I love you. I'm so glad you're here, Mike. Me too. Good night. You did it. I'm all going to take my sister to bed.

I'm very proud of you. We've all learned things from single moms today. Oh my. How to bring you the old back. Oh my God. Can I have that? I feel really good. Can you?

Do they do something with this trophy? Or is that? I mean, it is the property of the, whoever succeeds at the Greyhunt. It is their trophy to mount, utilize, or discard as they please. I just want to like go over and fold all the fingers back, except the middle one. Okay.

Can Grohlift it okay, I guess? He's probably the only one. Yeah, even if you're a 26 strength, you're like, A message from beyond. As you're kind of walking downstairs, Cassandra, who's awakened, kind of in her night where groggy steps down the street and sees, down the stairs and sees you, how's it gone? It went great, no problems at all.

totally took care of the problem in the woods, and you are safe, and so is all of Whitestone. So it's a success? Yes, great, grand success. Buy a mile, just totally a success. Little woozy, but she did the thing. Even amongst your messy self, she kind of leans in and just gives you a soft tub and holds you for a second

and pulls away, and she's shorter than you. You're, for half-health, your average size, but she's pretty short for a human, especially for the amount of personality she wields, but she looks up at you and says. The amount of personality she wields it, so you just did. Like emanating from her, like huge tracts of land. That's not immense.

She's. You guys, I swear on. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. We are children. But she looks up at you and he says, Congratulations. Welcome to the chamber.

Oh, thank you. Our mistress of the Graham's. Glad to be here. I'm just gonna patchy. Anyway, I'm gonna get some breakfast. And she looks down and notices the kind of somewhat congealed blood that's now spat at her cross parts. Sorry, ma.

I'm going to put on another dress. Anyway, welcome. Thank you. I'm glad. She walks back up to her chamber to change outfit as you guys continued on to see Vexite asleep. Yeah, let's get you into bed. Yeah?

You get some sleep. It's so funny. I had this vision when he said Greyhunt, I was going to charge in and be so amazing and maybe wear like a top hat as I was doing it, you know, just be really badass. A top hat? Yeah, you know, something like very hunty sort of thing. I can picture it. And then it just, it just fell a fucking part.

I mean like, no, I mean I killed it, don't worry, but but then as I was just, I was just, doing it, I was like, maybe I shouldn't be kidding it. Like, I don't know what I'm supposed to do. And then I tried to talk to it and it just didn't sound like it was listening to me. And then it like went away. And it might have been like going away because I asked her to go away. I'm opening the door to her room. I'm leading her in.

I mean, how many more times I'm gonna have to fucking do that? Hopefully not a lot, right? Maybe not ever again. That's what it sounded like. Right. Could be years. Could be years. Come on, let's get you, let's get your undone.

I start undoing the braid. You start doing her braid, helping her. As you do, she's like falling asleep while standing, and like the fenthrus just drops to the ground. Like, look, like. So nice. Set it. Come on, in bed, in bed, in bed.

Don't fall asleep yet, though. I'm listening. Are you? Yeah. You look like mother right now. You do. Keep going. I'm not sleeping.

I'm just closing my eyes. Fuck, I love you. I love you. Um, so you did it. You did the thing. Yeah. Yeah. You've carved out a little spot for yourself here.

Oh, well. For now. Yeah, I guess so. This is the second half of that conversation. We've nothing left to do in the short term. Right. You love Percival and Percival loves you.

So much, like he's just so in love. No, duh, no duh. Obviously. And I love Keeleith, and Kiki loves me. Just so much. I don't know. So much. I don't want to set time on it, but

You're leaving? You are going to stay here for a while. Yes. And you're welcome to come with me, but I don't think you want to go. No. You know, I'd hoped we'd have the gate stone for this moment, but... Wait, are you fucking leaving now? No, no, no, no.

I sit up. No, no, don't jump ahead of yourself. No, I just meant we have work to do. Yeah. I'm going to go to Zepra. And you're going to be nobility. Nability? No, that's funny.

How stupid is that, huh? Just a little bit, but you wear it really well. Thanks. You know. You're classy, I get some dresses made, it's no big deal. Yeah. It'll be so classy. I'm gonna go, you're gonna stay here. But now we have some homework to do. About what? About... Gods. Uh, yeah.

Yeah. And Keeleth can get us anywhere. Yeah. When we need. She's super, super badass. We, yeah. But you and I need to, well, we need to enjoy ourselves. You need to enjoy yourself.

But we also need to meet up and do a little research. Because you made the offer. I know, I know. So am I. Oh, please, not that music. That music gives me nightmares from my childhood. Could we get something a little bit lighter? Some lighter music here.

Are you a fan of true? crime TV shows. And what about Unsolved Mysteries? The show that jumped started all of our love of true crime. I'm Ellen Marsh. And I'm Joey Taranto. And we host I Think Not, a true crime comedy podcast covering some of the wildest stories from your favorite true crime can't be TV shows all the way to Unsolved Mysteries.

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It's ticklish business anywhere you look at it. Come on, we'll stick together. Love movies? Love classic movies? So do we. Ticklish Business is the podcast where classic film is discussed in modern times. Hosted by me, film hearing is Kristen Lopez and my co-host, author Emily Edwards, we dive into the golden age of cinema with fun, heart, and serious expertise. As published film historians and lifelong classic movie buffs, we bring insider insights, deep research, and lively debates with a variety of special guests, ranging from celebrities like Holly Madison to TCM luminaries Dave Carver and Eddie Muller,

and even family members of Old Hollywood Legends. Subscribe now to ticklish business on your favorite podcast app, and let's talk about Old Hollywood today. This is so stupid! Why are we making plans? for it. I mean, I'm so excited about it. We're making plans for it because she is not done. I know. You don't know. No, I do. She spoke to me, Vex. Vex, Zalia. Okay. And we're all, all of them, all of them are tied up in this and we need to have some idea of what we're doing because whatever just happened,

is just a test run in her eyes. I, oh, you mean like hell? I know, no, like all of it, right? Like the dragons, everything I know what you're talking about. Yeah. I know. The thing is, like, what are we gonna do? We don't know when she's gonna cash in on this?

No, no, it could be a decade from now. Exactly, so what are you gonna do? Live a decade going, The Raven Queen's expecting something. Oh, you're gonna live a decade going, well, here's my fuck all life. I'm enjoying it. Both of those things.

Okay. I want to enjoy myself. But just in case it's sooner, rather than later, you and I need to do a little bit of homework, which you were very good at in school. I'm awesome at homework and killing giant gray things. I can't remember its name anymore. Rendez.

I'm going to Zeffra. When? Why do you keep saying it? Eventually. Okay. Because it hurts, because I love you. Because you are... Stop, stop, stop, stop. Stop laughing for a minute. I'm my best friend.

You are my 20 and only you know what that means. It's all right if you go dear. You'll still be here. I'll still be there. I'll still be there. It's gonna suck. Giant dick. I don't know how to do anything without you. Yeah, well, you'll learn.

You'll learn. You'll learn. You're learning already. Are you like gonna get married? I think you should. I feel like you're gonna, I feel like you're gonna do it. I feel like it's gonna happen. I just want to be there for the wedding. Don't like go off in secret and do it all right.

I would be very pissed. I love you, let me sleep. Do you need to yak before you go? No, I'm gonna yack in my sleep. I'm gonna lay on my side. That sounds bad. Good night. Good night. Good night.

As she lays over and almost immediately passes out in the bed. You kind of give a long gaze as you step out of the room, Vax, and you turn, at the corner of your eye you see, a very faint movement. You glance over at the edge of the wall next to the door you lean to Fenthrus against the stone, you watch as elements of the vines and the curves and the designs of Fenthrus seem to almost grow

and curl even further. The bows seems to have established a more prominent visual presentation. So Vox Machina completes the final legs of their recent journeys. They come for the first time in a long time to a period of local, and nationwide peace, with much to pick up,

much to clean, much to rebuild, and much to discover for themselves the relationships and what means to each individual. You guys have a few weeks to contemplate what it is you do together and individually over the next year. When you return in about two weeks to critical role proper, it's going to be a little over a year later

from this moment. Really? Yeah, we're going to be returning to to you guys. We'll talk about this and we'll get an idea of what you guys want to do. However, next week we're still having an episode, but we have the pleasure of Liam O'Brien here running the next one shot following his last one at Warner Brothers in which both me and Marisha will actually be able to play in. Oh my gosh.

So that's gonna be fine. Yeah, yeah. Is Conan coming? Is Conan O'Brien? Yeah, he seems to be able to, I'm pretty sure. He's not doing much. We'll get him and Colbert a guest. No, I'm not going to be stupid. Oh my gosh. Yeah, so we have... Welcome back, Ashley.

Now you have to wait a year to play again. One year later. Yeah, one year later. So we'll talk and converse individually and as a group what you guys want to accomplish over the next year without the constant threat of perpetual death. And we'll see where that takes us in two weeks for the story of Ox Machina into the final arc of your story.

And return next week for the awesome one shot. I'm super excited. I don't, I really, I've never been able to play with most of you guys at all. This is so exciting. Which is pretty rad. I think Ceteen ran a game like half a decade ago that we played in together. Like playing as yourself. That's what's me. Yeah. What I don't know? Matt sucks. I'm going to. I'm going to be so bad. Terrible. He was terrible. He was terrible. I'm okay in the DN's chair, but I'm the worst. What does favorite terrain get me? Hey, I'm not gonna lie, I'm a bit of a rules lawyer.

So memorize your fucking players handbooks, you and your I apologize in advance. Oh yeah, I probably should have announced the winner earlier if I were really bad. I got caught up in the story. Ninja Joel 75, congratulations. I'm sure you already know this and you probably have known for a couple hours. But anyway, congratulations, you won the awesome package. How do this?

How do this? How do it? All right, well, we'll see you guys next week for Liam's awesome game, and we'll see you the week after that for the continuation of Oxmokin's story a year later. Until then, rest well, and is it Thursday yet? I'm good night, guys.