Critical Role & Sagas of Sundry - Vox Machina Ep. 99 - Masquerade

Episode Date: January 10, 2022

Tary returns to deal with the distinction of his family, and echoes of the past follow Vox Machina to Whitestone.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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For our 99th episode, which is crazy. What the good. That's absolutely bad shit. Damn. Which makes next week the 100th, which is crazy. Even more crazy, and it will be more crazy. Oh, man, oh man. Oh, no, that's right.

That's right, yeah. Intelligence. Anyway, guys, welcome. We have an awesome guest tonight. John Heater will be joining us. At the point. Who is it? Who is it?

the point in the narrative in which his character will arrive. But before then, let's go and get through our announcements for the evening. First and foremost, we have a new merch item, I believe. Yes, we did! Laura, if you want to go to introduce it and possibly... Oh, well, I know some of you have been, you know, wanted to hear more about Scanlan and we thought it would be great to release a concerti of his, so... Wait, turn around, because it's even better on the back!

Hey! Yeah! And if you notice, um... He's got a few canceled appearances there at the end. Because he died. Because he's a traitor as bitch. Yeah, he's dead. So yeah, and it's pretty cool.

And that's in the store right now. Go check it out. How about it got right now? Into the meat man. If we can't have Scalyn, at least we got the shirt. That's right. That's right. Good memories.

Sometimes, yeah. Maybe we'll see Scalin in concert sometime. And we'll be like, It's not going to happen. We used to hang out before you were famous. Yeah, before he was famous. We used to know that guy. Under your leg.

Under your lip. Oh, right off. Still there. I got my side. You got it. You got it. You got it. Now it's continue.

So, anyway, other things. The campaign guide, the title of right campaign guide, info is up on the Green Rohnen website. If you're looking for, they have dates and release, price points, and where you can find it and when. So if you go to the Green Ronen website, do a Google search for Green Ronan, They have a second there for the front page that has all the updates, or you can look at Green Ronan Pub on Twitter. They have the updates there as well. I also retweeted it on my Twitter, so you can find it there.

But that should answer your questions. Because we've gotten a bunch today. Also, tomorrow and Saturday, up in Seattle, the actual folks at Dungeons and Dragons are doing the stream of annihilation in which they're having a bunch of people from the community coming out there to play games together, mix it up, be crazy, and unveil their new kind of story setting, which I'm really excited for you guys to find

out about. But as part of that, Marisha Talieson Lehm and myself will be going up there and playing some games. I'll be running a game on Saturday morning with the Guts Girls Glory group. And this can be a lot of fun. So you should come watch. Find out of information at the Fish Holden Nets & Dragons Twitter. And we look forward to seeing you guys over the next couple days up there as well. I'll be in Las Vegas this weekend for... Gambling? No. For a Gears of War event. So if you guys play Gears of War competitively, come out and fight and then see the... I like Gears...

Go out and fight Laura. Are you going to play competitive Gears of War? No, I'm going to cheer people on, though. Real good. I wish it was... Cool. Awesome. Also, next weekend, not this, but the weekend after that, I'll be at Acon, June 8th to the 11th in Fort Worth, Texas.

Oh my college there. Yeah. Travis went to college there. Also, one wants you guys know that there is a charity bank event happening at the event, which is going to be like a two, three hour dinner meal provided, hang out. I'll be part of that. You can come actually talk to me in person. So one of the few guaranteed ways that I'll have an opportunity to interface with people. So you don't have to wait in line for it necessarily. And it's an add-on to your con ticket. And if you're there, all the, I mean the proceeds of that ticket all go to the Texas Scottish Scottish Rite Hospital. So it's a cool event. Happy to support awesome charity and hopefully get to see some of you guys there.

Uh, Wednesday Club. Tell us what you got coming up? We're talking about the Young Avengers this next week. We just finished Wonder Woman. It was a great time. We wore tiaras and capes and talked. Did you really? Matt wore the cape and I wore the tiara. It was really good. The Young Avengers? We're going to be talking about the Young Avengers. Kid Hulk. Kid Iron Man. You're actually, you were Hulkling. Okay. And Iron Lad, but doing all right.

But we're going to be talking about the teenage superheroes of the Marvel U, specifically the ones who take the Avengers name and They're really kind of fun, and the modern take on them is really going to be influencing a lot of the stuff that ends up on TV. It's going to be a lot of fun. They're some of my favorite books. They're badass. Awesome. Thank you, T. Check out Wednesday Club. And of course, we have Talks Machina live on Tuesday next week about this episode you see tonight at 7 p.m. Pacific Time here on Twitch and Alpha. Hosted by our Fantastic Brian Wayne Foster. Burn, burn, first you.

Check. Check it out then. I've got one. What did you got? I didn't put it on the list. No, you didn't. but it's a present for Liam O'Brien. Yay! I did get to give him his birthday present last week,

and now I do get to. Yay. Twin birthday present. Remembered it was your birthday. Oh my goodness. I read it all pretty, open it up. Okay, we did a thank you in advance and afterwards as well. Earpening it.

Erpening her! We'll edit this part out right. There's a. Yeah. I just meant the unwraim. It's a ring box. Please be a turn. It's just a pile of blue poop.

Oh. What is it? Wow. Oh my god. Did you see it? It's not big enough. It's a, oh man, it's beautiful. What is it?

It's a ring and it's got raven feathers on and a little black gem and on the inside it says, do not go far for me. Oh, wow, Twinsies. Boom. Thank you. You're welcome. I don't know if it'll be.

I'll fit you, but you know, happy birthday, and all that. No, not my dear. Is it a genuine gold-style ring? Did it fit? A fit? I guessed it. Nice.

It is beautiful. I love it so much. Perfect. Love it. That's a great birthday present. All right. That's really awesome. Happy birthday.

Both of you guys after the fact. Yay. Thank you. All right then. Anyone else? Anyone else? Let's go ahead and dive into tonight's episode of Critical Role. Hello and welcome back.

Damn. So, where we last left off, Vox Machina had discovered that one of their companions, the most reason in addition to their team, Terry and Darrington, had gone missing, seemingly taken by a bounty hunter who had masqueraded as a pastry chef and was retrieving him to be returned to Wildmount within the city of Deering. Diastock to the rest of the Darrington family. Upon heading them off the pass and retrieving Tery and you all made your way to Dostock and spoke with the rest of the Tarian Darrington family and discovered it seems that they have gone into serious debt. There's been a long running agreement between the Darrington's and a criminal syndicate known as the Myriad that seems to be very prominent in Wildmount. And as the years have gone by, that debt has compounded and compounded to the point where they were threatening to take everything from the Darrington family and toss them out of the street. Your father, Howard, told you that his plan

to prevent this from happening was to marry you off to a very rich and powerful family up in the capital of the kingdom, and you decided to look for other options. You went and spoke with a gentleman named Korshad, who was within a secret bar beneath the grumpy lily, where a bunch of Seams Myriad and other lowlifes go to drink, be merry, and go about their business in a safer environment. You seem to talk with them about a possibility of making some sort of arrangement, and an accord was made where if you went and cleansed a nearby platinum mine of Herethus that had seemingly been overrun with some sort of awoken entity that had prevented them from mining the platinum and are losing a lot of money, If you were to destroy this creature or cleanse the mines of the threats to it, they would forgive some of the debt. They would still take the lands from the Darrington family, but they would leave the estate.

They would leave whatever remains on that land and would not mess with them any further, thus ending the contract and still leaving a comfortable lifestyle for the family. You agreed to this. Made your way to the Hertha's Platinum mines, delved deep into the open sinkhole that seemed to consume a portion of its construct, and discovered what had awoken within. a strange, once-seeded celestial that had been awoken too early and too young. As such, its weird angelic, baby-like form had withered and twisted. And in battling the Celestial, which manipulated the terrain around you, you managed to defeat it and destroy it before it

could escape, gathered some of its remaining kind of glittery ashes, if you will, and proceeded to fly up to the sinkhole as the rest of the Ankhag swarm that seemed to parade. through the tunnels within, began to swarm up the sides and spit acid at you as you escaped out the top into the moonlit sky. Looking down below, you could see the swarm, now crawl it up and out of the ma' of this mine, and that's where we left off. So as you've all just emerged out of the central portion of the mine, taking a deep breath as you're now suddenly out of the immediate danger, you can look down and see the dozens of large insectoid-like onkegs now clamoring up to the top and the edge. Some of them

seemingly shooting jets of acid far, too far away to make any impact, but they are intent definitely on trying to either shoe you off of their territory or hit at some sort of lucky impact as their point is. What do you guys want to do? I, Terry and Derrington, I would like to call to the rest of the gang and say, wait, Before we fly away, hold. Hold. Superman. Oh, okay.

That was some sort of power move. No. How are we positioned again? So you have the broomwriters. You have Percival on your broom. You're flying with your wings. Everyone else is on the carpet. And everyone else is on the carpet.

Okay. I would like to just sort of shout to my friends, Oye, can we, but just before we go, could we maybe just swoop down one more time? Just a quick flyby. I have an idea, I feel like we need just an insurance policy when we go talk to the Myriad fellow.

I was wondering if Kiki here could maybe throw a spell down before we leave. Is that something? You just go down by yourself, bro. I do still have some spells left. It depends on what you wanna do though and what I have prepared. Well, here's a question.

Can you make it look like the mouth of the cave isn't there anymore, has caved in, or is covered in dirt or rocks or something? I can. I have a few options for that. Why do you want that? As I said, I feel like when we talk to the Myriad Fellow, oh wait, let me fly over to you.

I feel like when we talk to the Myriad Fellow, we have lost our bargaining position at this point, because we did what he asked. But if we hide the mouth of the cave from him, then we have information that he needs. Like where did it go? How do you get in? That kind of thing.

I was also hoping maybe dear Pike could leave some sort of a trap. Again, as just an insurance policy. A glyph situation? Yes, some sort of a thing that would explain. when someone comes by. But I know it's crawling with characters down there, so I don't, should we wait? I don't know. I could do such a thing.

I can do like a hallucinatory terrain, which I could do right now, because I do have it learned. It covers a 150-foot cube, which I don't know. How wide is the hole? Is it a 153 cube? That would cover pretty much the sinkhole itself. Do keep in mind, the agreement was to cleanse the mind, not just of the creature, but

the infestation. Oh, shit, ass. The whole infestation? Oh, we have to kill all the fuckers? Or at least enough to the point where the infestation is no longer an issue. Terry, can you tinker up some raid real quick? I cannot. Can we like get higher enough?

Wait, we have to kill more of these fuckers? Maybe we just get high enough that they can't get to us with the acid and then we just fly our things down at them. Roughly speaking, how many of those did we see when we came up? You saw probably close to 100. There were a few that you destroyed on the way up. destroyed on the way up or something they got wrecked, but you probably have somewhere in the neighborhood of, I'd say, anywhere from 60 to 70 that are now visibly coming up the wall. You can see the moonlight kind of, you can see the walls moving.

Well, we can if we gather them in one place. Are they attracted to anything? Like, shiny things? Hats, we need bait. Or movement? Us. You're not sure. Attracted to us? They seem to have been, they seem to have been drawn by the noise. The sounds and the movement of the combat you had at the bottom of the cavern and it took them long enough for the battle you had to get down there and now they're skittering back up the wall as you guys with your torchlight making your way up towards the face.

Can I just start shooting there and keep coming? Let's just shoot it. T, do you have anything that lets you teleport is all? No. Not really. I can become invisible and fly down there. Do you have any good terrain? What about a demand? Never mind. What about what? I don't say dimension door, but that's... Wrong.

Oh, yeah. I mean, if we can... So, okay, they're attracted to movement and sound. Percy, you have a very loud banging thing. I do. If we can get them all clumped together, I can throw down a few fireballs in flaming spheres and probably take a lot of them out, but I need them clumped together.

Why do you fireballs... What do we have that's dead in the bag of holding right now? of holding right now. All parts. Let's just start throwing them down some things to eat, and I'm going to start making some noise. Are they still on the walls? You see a lot of them are still making their way towards the mouth of the cavern, and there's probably about 25 or so that are gathered around the outside. Some of them are spreading

a little bit out trying to get towards where you are on the edges of the hole. If you wanted to move towards the top, we might draw them towards the edge. Let's fly above it, and I'll take a few shots, and we'll just start dropping things down. One other idea. What if I go in as bait, make a lot of noise, and as they swarm, I throw whisper and throw it into his shoulder blades, and then I'm on piggyback. Okay. I like that song.

No, what, why they're already at the top? The broom pretends. We might not need it. Would the fireball where they are encompass them all? A couple fireballs? Not all of them, but I can get a lot of them. I can also throw some fireballs. Yeah.

We can fireball together. Percy and I just fly up and we start firing down. I'm gonna start making noise. I'm just boom booming. Yeah. Yeah. I point to a spot for Percy to see if I can get them to gather there, and I start writing a fireball to watch. Okay, so the two of you fly over to that side and you start making bad news, just explosion clatter as your gargantuan firearm just

p pshund shots at them as I go. And you take one or two of them down through repeated shots as their armor cracks and breaks you hear, we'll throw some meat down there too. Okay. Is the noise centered on your gun though and not down below? Yeah, but I'm flying right above. Yeah, but they'll gather in the spot to get to it. As they fly above, and you can start to see them shooting these jets of acid in the arc as it gets to spray through,

and you kind of mark a little bit to stay just out of that range as you continue to do so. But the noise you are making is you're watching them slowly kind of cluster up beneath where you guys are. Great. Okay. Let me know when that gets like it looks like a good cluster. You got a pretty good cluster. Probably about, let's say, a 20-foot radius. They're closing all the space there. Yeah.

Probably get about 10 in one blast. Thank you. Yeah, let's throw down just a big old fireball. All righty. Bump, bum, bum, bum. Twenty-four radius. You shake my nerve, and you ground on my brain. But I'm a big, and say,

You broke my way. Oh, what a thrill. Goodness, gracious, three balls of fire. And with that, for the sake of brevity on this standpoint, you will wait until they begin to gather into one space. And with a singular fireball, Kielith, you watch as you send four of them screeching down, falling into the pit from the blast,

while six of them appear to be heavily wounded or burned to a cinder and kind of run off, screaming before collapsing and then smoldering maybe 20 feet from the pit. More swoop up to gather into that space. Now that explosion has drawn their attention as well. And you see a few kind of stop for a second, smelling the ruin of their companions. and you see a moment there to shoot another fireball

as soon as they're gathered. Yeah. This one finishes off any of the stragglers there and heavily damages a handful of others. You watch now, over the period of time of you both shooting, you taking arrows and what's available. Over the next five to six minutes or so, you guys cut down the numbers to about half what they were.

And there's now just broken wreckage of on kegs, just tore open from the explosion. Their chitinous armor kind of just fractured and open with the smoldering innards just kind of burning and sizzling, from the impact of the fire, they start to slow their as more and more than begin to die, and you watch as they all begin to burrow back into the earth, kind of scattering deeper into the ground. Vax, do you still have any of that?

You had to think about it. Five years, still thinking about it. Five years, 100 episodes later. Do you still have any of that poison? Actually, like a poison in, anybody have any, anybody have any poison? I do. We have poison. Yep, yep, you want some?

Well, I was thinking if we still have- You got it, I pull out the jug and I go, Poison! Splashes around inside. It's pretty good, Crog. Did you want to drink it? Well, um, I, no. No.

It's a really hard hole if you do. Another time, I'll rain check you, bud. Do we still have any more or like bore parts? Yeah, we know we got an or like a calf and a foot and just a, it looks like a skull, covered in like post-disorce. Yeah, like, like, raid. Like, if we dip maybe some food in poison

and throw it down there, everyone that's left will come and eventually eat it. Everyone, doesn't this one calf? There's like 40 or 50 of them left, right? There's about 40 to 50. And they're burrowed now? Some of them are getting to burrow, and it looks like some of some have kind of gotten wind

of the wreckage. I wonder if we can send fire into the caves where they're buried. You've created tsunamis as well. Do you think you could flush them out? I do still have my six level spell. I could attempt to get to a few of their tunnels and collapse their tunnels.

Can you fill the whole tunnel with water and drown them? Yeah. I could. I could. Too big. Too big. To fill the whole tunnel with water and drown them? That's a lot.

I have a- We can't create chemicals, can we? I just didn't bring. You're mine. I'm. I'm. No, not really. I can create water, but I don't think it would be enough to flush them out. I just made this poison for like no fucking reason.

I'll do shots. I'm just kidding. You go first? I mean, you kind of volunteered it very quickly, so. You can't just make a material. Are we just like above the hole? You're above the hole holding the jugging on? I take initiative. I take the orke leg. Don't get it in the poison. All right. Toss it.

And I take the lab. The last is the last orc piece to the bag. Caglouche. Is that reminence of dork still? No. No, no. The ox is way gone. That poor bastards.

We burned through that ages ago. Two little orc parts, now poisoned at the bottom of the tunnel. They're very soft. Yeah. Very like long-cooked lamb. They're just like dripping off the bone. You're like, put it off there. I want to do it.

Are they in the bag of colding? Are they in the bag of holding? No. No, they were not. They're definitely soft. I feel like a commune with nature, and then, because I know I already... You build a commune with nature? Commune with nature.

Yeah. And... Oh, glass houses, how's that? Yeah, right? I just like the image of a spell that. I just look at a spell that creates a hippie commune somewhere in your fantasy world. That's pretty cool. If we were back at White Stone, I would feel okay saying that I had...

I don't think I'd be carrying the shit with me. I thought that was conjure fe. True enough. Yeah. So anyway, what you're doing? Can I, can I, because I already got like a map of their tunnels. Can I then do? Do move Earth to, like, have a book. But they can collapse.

You get the sense that as burrowing creatures, collapse in the tunnels might slow them down, but they'll probably still dig their way out. Wait. What are the chances that I have materials for making explosives on me? I mean, enough to maybe like. No, but just the materials.

Not the time to make them, but just the materials. Because one of the materials of making TNT is diatinaceous Earth. And if it's a micronized diatious Earth, that means that it's actually an insecticide. Allison Daffrey, what are you talking about? Specifically for hard shell insects. I have an idea. I have an idea.

I wouldn't have enough though if you could make more. You wouldn't have anywhere near enough to do what you're trying to do. Not nearly enough. Take one out. I'm gonna, I'm gonna. Wait, wait. Sorry, yes. Pike.

I would like to cast earthquake. Okay. Maybe I can wiggle it all closed. Okay. Shake them out. Tunnels. Okay, so you cast earthquake. What's the cast on time on that?

It's just one action. Okay. So you look there and focus for a second. Close your eyes, and you guys watch as the edges of the sinkhole kind of getting a shift, the single tower that was partially collapsed, collapses into full bits of rock and rubble, and some of it spills further into the tunnel. As the tunnel begins to cave in, basically you fill in the rest of the sinkhole and the mine now drops about 25, 30 feet, as the rest of the earth comes and fills it in. Eventually, the rumbling slows and comes to a calm. You see now there's a dip where the space in the forest was. It's like a big bowl, and some of the trees kind of fall into it. Get buried in the earth and stone as it collapses in the word.

It's still. I love that. I love that everybody was up here bickering and Pike just went. I had some hoot. Yeah, get it done. A few moments passed when you watch as some of the on cakes being to like pop back. like the collapsed tunnels have forced them to kind of begin burrow their way to the surface

to orient themselves. You watch this about five, ten, 20 or so of these begin to emerge, and as they emerge, they kind of look around the space, and you watch them kind of looking at each other and sniffing the area. I'm gonna firestorm them. Oh, shit.

You got firestorm! Yes! Just letting pipe off the high oi-hoish. Oh, by the way, I can create a Holocaust. Is that what? Piking in this world and a holocaust, in a hall... All right, so as everyone's kind of marveling over your earthquake, a little pike goes, and also, and you watch as about 30 or so of these creatures have now emerged, and they're all kind

of communicating with each other and their tenders are going by and they're beginning to look around, and this streak, the zigzag of burning flame just... Tears across the base of this bowl and just incinerate. about 20 of them. You'll now see them immediately smoldering, turning to ash, these blackened kind of clusters of heavily charred husk, and the others that got to the surface just scattered into the forest. You get the sense that the ruin you've left,

the collapsing of the tunnels, and the rather large portion of their populace that you've left destroyed, there's probably not much of an infestation left here in the mines. Yeah, you're too bad, best case. Did we also destroy the mine? Well, I mean, it's still there. It's just been filled in. There was no stipulation about that in the agreement. Well, technically isn't the point of a mind to like dig out?

Now they can dig extra. No, it's fresh. Now it's like day one again. Maybe they're gone. It's like brand new. It's like brand new mine. There's none left. They're all gone. I mean that you saw come to the surface scatter.

Okay. I think we did a good job. We could have. Smushed those and gotten so drunk. How do you feel, Terry? That's pretty awesome. Yeah, I think mission accomplished. Let's go.

Let's go. Let's get the fuck out of here. So, you guys, make your way back towards Dia Stock. Sorry. Make way back towards Dia Stock. You still have access to your windwalks that has this non-concentration that lasts a while. So quickly enough with your equipment in place, you guys can traverse rapidly back to the city of which you began this journey. began this journey. You make your way back to the Grumpy Lily. Introduce yourself to the

two denizens within with the phrase, if you recall. Uh, chicken a business. We want to talk to the many. The many, the many, yes. The same elderly gentleman's like, hey, okay, shuffles over and opens the same doorway that leads you through the stairs into the central hallway where there's that one gruff guy in the stool, recognizes you, kind of nudges you, and it opens the door. And you step in to the tavern. It's not as busy as it was last time. It's probably about maybe two-thirds of the clientele there,

but the music is still going, there's people chatting, having drinks, and at a different table you see Korshah just sitting alone. Hands still crossed, cup half full, still resting beneath him. And as soon as you enter, his eyes are trained on you. Whether it was expectant or just sheer luck, or his eyes are always trained on whoever through the door. As soon as you enter the establishment, you watch as his smile kind of cracks the sides of his mouth and the edges of his little crow's feet curl up a bit. Any kind of emotions for you over? Do you think he has friends? He's always alone. Yeah, I'm going to start

eyeballing the room while cis goes and talks. He has lots of friends. They just talk together. Is Camilla still playing music? The musicians are not currently. What time is it now? You're never going to see her again. At this point, it's first. It's very hard. early morning, I'll say for the purposes of the hour that you got there, best that I can recall, it's like 1.30 in the morning. It's pretty late. Excuse me. May we sit and talk? But of course, have a seat. Thank you. We have done our share of the bargain, and we're here to cash in our chit, as it will, as it will. As it will. His head kind of looks at you, aren't you?

You did not leave, but a number of hours ago, am I too expected she have completed this task already? Yeah, we're really, really good. And you should know that if you've apparently been watching us. And kind of motions are fit. You're up towards one of the second rows, and you watch as one of the guards there, the ones that you've noticed before, kept your eyes on,

have the hidden crossbows, kind of knocks on the edge of a door. It opens up slightly, he whispers to somebody, A few moments later, another guard walks escorting what looks to be a young, mousy woman of red-brown skin. Her eyes, as soon as you get a glance, are snow-blind. And you watch as the guard that's with her is actually holding her arm and guiding her as she walks.

She has big black curls that trail down to her middle back. And as she's led to the table, Korshad kind of gives a little whistle, and a drink is brought at her place. And she sits down. Looks a little kind of confused in her. nervous, but sits down and kind of leans into Khorchad. And he turns to her and says, this is Dualla. Greetings adventurers. Spring has sprung here in Los Angeles. And that means it's a brief period where it's only 75 degrees instead of 95 degrees. I'll take it.

And that means I've been outside a lot more. Walking around, occasionally galloping after a toddler hopped up on juice boxes, traveling a bit. You know the vibe. And after doing some spring cleaning, my wardrobe, I gotta say, looking a little bit sad. I want clothes that can keep up with me and my son, but updating my wardrobe every spring sounds pretty expensive. So that's why I wound up signing up for Fabletics as a VIP. It let me overhaul my springtime outfits without obliterating my bank account. New VIPs unlock major savings on that first purchase, so trying new fits feels way more doable. When I signed up as a new VIP with Fabletics, I got 70 to 80% off everything. It made it easy to grab a few new pieces without overthinking it.

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It's so comfy I could just live in it 24-7. It's perfect for walking my dog on like a chilly night. But when I'm out and about, I've really been loving the ribbed Johnny Collar Polo. It makes me look like I should be taking a high-powered meeting by the pool at the White Lotus, but hopefully with less murder involved. I don't know. It's insanely comfortable.

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day returns. Quince.com slash critical role. She will confirm your words. and guava. She kind of glances her face over past your group, and as she does, she reaches into a pouch and brings out what looks to be a few stone runes, and she kind of clatters them across the table. And as soon as she puts her fingers out in front and spreads them like that, the runes all magnetically shift to match the placement of her fingers below. Her snow-blind eyes now go pure white. And there's just a moment where you watch as her head begins to drift back. Do I recognize this one? Do I recognize this bar?

You do not. Okay. At least not this form of casting. After a minute or so, her eyes come back to their snow-blind appearance. Her fingers curl back in, and with a very small voice, she goes, The mine is cleansed, though the mine is also collapsed. Korshah, it's kind of looking at her and goes, But you say it is cleansed, yes.

of everything. She gives a nod. It is free. It looks back to you all with a very sly, kind of begrudging brow, when I still kind of partially closed. Very well. You will send men to confirm the depths of this, and operations will begin. If at any point it is discovered that this was some sort of charade or the means of our were not met fully, we would be happy to make sure the rest of the Darrington estate falls back squarely under our grasp. However, for the time being, and if what you say is true, he reaches under the table and sits through a small sack that he had kind of held between his feet and ankles, pulls out a heavy piece of parchment.

The deed to the Darrington Estates Signed over. Two one Terry and Errington. Might I make a few more requests? When last we spoke, we spoke in vague terms. There was some cash talked about, and also a place for my family to make a little bit of money or food. There's a farmhouse nearby our main estate.

It's nothing special, a few acres of land. I would love to keep that as well so that we could have a source of food for the winters. Make persuasion check, Mr. Do-Eyeed. Youngin. Yeah. Blink, bling, bling. Uh, 22. 22. You are young.

Not yet spoiled by the strange truths of the world around you. I admire your optimism in the future. face of the unknown. It may be your salvation or it may be your end. Only time will tell. I'll give you this farmland. We are most grateful. But if at any point your family comes back to me requesting any more inches in our agreement, I will happily take it back. Understood. I wasn't quite finished yet though.

He leans back in his chair, his arms now being removed from his mouth and going into an expectant cross. What we saw down there in the platinum mines was the 230,000 gold that we owe you times 10, times 20. What we've just done for you is given you access to as much money as you could ever want. And I feel that's valuable. My family will require a bit of spending money to get ourselves back on our feet. We are accustomed to a lifestyle, and we'd like to maintain it for a little while, at least. I'd say 50,000 gold should be about enough

to last us for a year or two. He nods, things forward. And you better start saving. What if I sweetened the deal? We have among us an amazing sorceress who could open that mine up for you with a flick of her wrist. of her wrist save you hours and hours of work, possibly back-breaking work that could cost the lives of many of your men. That would be a very kind gesture towards the state you left

the mine in. So that's a maybe? Let's call it the last thread of my patience, young Derrington. So that's a hard yes. Dwarah, you may return to your quarters. Thank you very much. She gets up and kind of looks past you all with a nod, and then her guardian escorts her back at the chamber as Korshatt has just trained on you. What I have given you is far more than many in my position would.

I will work hard to make sure that this softness I have displayed does not hinder my reputation. And the more you press, The more you may be the end of that softness, my friend. I recommend you stick to the deal we've made. Be happy that I've shown any mercy and be on your way. I'll make do, and we will have to adjust our living standards, that's all. Indeed.

Perhaps your father might raise a finger or two and earn some money for himself. We'll see. Thank you. Good day. Good evening. Almost dead. He almost said. He takes his drink and kind of sips it and gives this kind of motion with his hand as his eyes finally avert from Terry and the rest of your group. And he kind of looks away in a contemplative expression. As he does so, you watch as the guards all begin to shift out of the crowd. And you watch as many of the various tavern folk that were laughing and drinking are all quiet now looking upon the rest of the people.

now looking upon the rest of you. That's the Moriarty shit right here. Yeah. All right. You get the sense that pretty much everybody in this establishment, patron or not, are all keeping an eye on this, all part of Korshad's guard, in some way, shape, or form,

and you've been given leave. You're totally right, he has so many friends. I told you. Let's do this. Everyone dies. Probably. Just doesn't sit with any of us. Everybody, let's light it up.

You watch us, as Wence comes up to you, as it's happening goes, ha. I, hey, oh, look, you see no very nice folk. She'll probably, we'll leave. Okay, good. Drink for the road. And he gives you a little shot to you, Vax. He goes,

But why do we have to go? I'm just kidding. I just really like it here. I know, it's great atmosphere. That was the end of box-mocking story. Yeah. All right, you make your way out, back up through the Rambi Lili, back onto the streets of the deep,

Deep dark morning hours in Dia Stock. What do you wish to do? Wow, that was weird, yes. It was weird. Do we need to tell you firmly what we did? Absolutely. Break the knees to dad, yeah. In the morning?

I guess maybe in the morning, they're probably all asleep now. It's definitely 2 AM. She just get further with the bartender. We're also a little Jimmy Jack. But I haven't actually had the drink yet. I was afraid it might be poisoned. Yeah, maybe not.

The steal of the drink. Oh, God. Possible. Make a cut. No, I'm kidding. I haven't swallowed it, I'm just going to, hmm, hmm. It numbs a bit of the surface skin, seems like a strong alcohol. All right, congratulations us.

Maybe later. Oh. Should give you a new more expensive shot? We are a little bit up and stuff. We should probably heal up. We'll go to my house and... Your house. Your house.

It is now your house. Your house. Who's house? Whose house? T's house. Well done. I mean it's in your name. Yeah. You're a homeowner.

I could get a second mortgage. You could kick your dad out. You could evict your family. Oh, God. You could refinance. I could refinance. I hear mortgage rates are really low right now. I get the tax.

So make it right back to the Darington estate? Yes. Okay. The guest quarters are cramped for the volume of travelers you have with you, but as you approach and knock on the door, there's a slight pause before your... Birdhole. Yes, thank you. The Brasken Dragon-Borne companion comes up with his nightcap on, kind of in front of his face, and he's got his little lantern.

He's like, oh, I assume you must to stay here. I'll arrange for... Come in, come in. He kind of rubs his eyes as he leads you inside. It's quiet and still in the house. It's dark. No light aside from the small lantern that Burthold has. And he leads you on the bottom floor to the guest quarters, which are two separate rooms, each with a singular bed.

And you watch as he begins to just grab cushions from various chairs and display sofas that are covered in dust that haven't been sat in for a decade at least. And it's like trying to arrange them in the haphazard kind of floor. betting scenario. I want to see where he's going with this. He gets to a point where he gives up and goes,

ah, there. Good night. It just walks away. Well, we slept in blanket forts before. It's been a while. Not the first, not the last. I get the big cushion. Oh, it's got a bar in the middle.

Display furniture sucks. You still do have your room, too, if you want to use it. My room? Your room. Oh, yeah, of course. I'm going there. Oh, really? you're gonna leave us down here, you fucking, Highborn piece of shit. All right, I'll stay back down here with the pillow fort thing.

Fine. But after they go asleep, I go upstairs and go back to me. Okay then. Make a stealth check. Jesus. Four. Half you open an eye in the middle of the night. You hear the creaking of the wood flooring. Just going to the bathroom.

My trader. By the way, do you have any beast changing left in you? I do, yeah. Could you go Minxie for me? Kinky. It's going to get weird. No, well, I mean, yes, why? I want a pillow.

Fine. Unless Brian blessed me. Okay. I could have just used drinking. Trinkin Farts are a issue. Yeah. They really are. They really are.

Again, like a circle, like a dog, on one of the cushions. You know, like, turn a right three times. Roll, roll, roll, drop. Can't find the-fight, keeps going. It's how Roggnoem sleep. They do a little circle around the cushion. I just turned into Macklemore. All right.

So, you make it to your room. Left as it was. Most of the furniture is covered in sheets, but untouched as to where you left it last time you were here. There is a firm layer of dust across. most of it. And as you step in the room with each step, you can see the footfall is leaving a small trail on the floor. You have the large shelf of books to line the right wall. You can see the footsteps to and from the bookshelf where it seems that your mother has taken here and there, little elements of your collection. You see the covered outline of your workbench, which inhabits the far side of the chamber, and the familiar smell of old oil and leathers. Immediately causes a flood of memories to hit you of growing up in this space.

you do see kind of poking out from one of these sheets some of the leftover pieces when you constructed your first Doty. And you see the kind of the armored hand kind of partially open with some of the gears and the ruins only partially put into the hand and it was kind of discarded and left at the side. And it kind of also reminds you of those years.

And you have this kind of very nostalgic wave hit you as you pulled the sheet off your bed and kind of dust it out and fluff your pillow. And for the first time in a long time, have a night's sleep in your own chambers. I'll cuddle with the doty arm. It's very cold. But sleep does take you.

You guys finish your evening's rest. You awake after the stress of the previous battle of the day, you all tend to sleep in for the most part, plus the late hour of which you eventually, getting to rest. You all eventually come to later in the morning, closer to noon. But as you wake up, you wake up to the smell of food being cooked. You make your way out into the central foyer area of the estate, and you can see Bert Holtz is just running around the kitchen, desperately trying to put together whatever meal is viable and eventually shouts out,

breakfast is served. What's you got, Bernie? It's, didn't have time. Didn't know you were having breakfast, staying the night, and the market wasn't open. Potatoes. Potatoes. Some bread might be a bit stale. I made some stew. Breakfast stew. It's just stew, but you're having it for breakfast. Some mushrooms. That's it. I am sorry. That's not good.

Irish breakfast. That's not like shit. A lot of carbs. It's all right. Is this how we're supposed to eat in the House of Darrington, Terry? You just used up all of their food and they don't have like any left. I'm just all covered. I'm sorry, I'll talk to the help about this. Can't you like pop a crystal off of that helmet at yours and make a banquet?

No, I could burn us all alive though with one of them. Not the same thing. Did we ever discover whether or not the magic jug does coffee? Only one way to find out. Only one way to find out. No, don't. Be my guest. Americano.

Coffee fee. Nope. No. How about tea? Tea? T? Nope. Really?

Wait, it can make alcohol and poison, but it can't make an English breakfast? English breakfast ale! Oatmeal. Bake beans and sausages? No, no. Yeah, breakfast ale. That works.

Breakfast beer. As you guys complete your breakfast, you notice, eventually, Mary Ann's voice begins to echo through the stairway, she comes down and goes, My word, Bertolt, what are you cooking this? She comes down. You can see her hair's kind of curled in front of her face and pulled back and tied up into this tight bun in the back,

and she's just wearing this long, deep blue robe over her just casual silk blouse attire and pants. She kind of glances down, holding onto the railing. Um, good morning. Good morning, sister. Hi. I, these are my friends, Voxmachina. Hello.

Right. Grog, Pike, Vex, Pax, Percy, Keelit. Pleasure. Um. Brother, I wasn't where we had company staying. I travel with a group now. I've heard it. I bring news and I know it's early, but could you,

could we have a little family meeting over breakfast? She gives you such a stink eye. Yes. I'll go speak to father. And mama. And mama. She heads up a stairs. She seems nice.

She's not. Does she though? I like her a lot. About five minutes past. I'm extremely excited about all of this. We can hear the sound of multiple footfalls as the rest of the Derrington family makes their way down. First, you have Marianne.

Same attire, but she's a little more put together, you can see now she's left the robe behind to have more of her classic formal presenting to company outfit. Behind her you have Maria, your mother, who is in this practically the same outfit she was in yesterday. She really doesn't seem to care at this point. It's more about being comfortable. And a few... Sweat pants. Sweat pants. A few feet behind to his own entrance, there you see with his thick mutton chops and a tied over like deep red kind of burgundy coat, Howard

Derrington. As they all enter, Maria immediately runs forward and goes, I didn't realize breakfast was going to be made. She goes over and starts to take the little plate and starts filling it with rolls and potatoes. She goes up and kind of rubs your head a little bit and kiss him in the forehead and goes, it's nice to have company. It's nice to be home. Did you want some stew? She should come.

We'd like her. And Howard at this point is just sitting back next to Mary Ann. Goes, Oh, did you want some as well? I'm fine for now. Your sister tells me that we are to have a family meeting. Yes, and with your permission, I would like to invite my friends

to stay for it as well as it does concern them. Hey. Hi. Charmed. Very well. I bring you news, and I bring you a proposal. And as a businessman, I hope you'll listen to both. He seems keen at the choice of words.

Yes, my son. First, the news. It's good news. First, I will not be well not be more. marrying this Lydia person. There's no need, and also, I think we all know I would not be happy in such a marriage, and we should all be free to pursue whomever we love. That's beside the point. It's not necessary because I have made a deal with the myriad, a deal that will spare us from any danger and clear us from all death. Me, well, they really, carried out a task for the myriad that has absolved us of the debt that you ran up. And we are free and clear.

He looks to Maria and Marianne, and he softens up. I am, if what you say is true, this is indeed a great day. I owe each and every one of you a great debt. We. owe you a great debt. Let's not get ahead of ourselves, but thank you. Yes, they don't, forgive me for speaking on your behalf. I don't think that they want to collect on a debt. They just did this because we're friends. The forgiveness of debt comes with some strings attached.

We will lose most of our property and assets. But we will maintain the homestead here. and all of its possessions and artwork and belongings we get to keep. We also get the nearby farmhouse and all of the land. And we get a new lease on life and a new beginning. I think it's an opportunity for our family. And that leads me to my proposal.

Father, as much as I have respected you for keeping us safe and providing for us, You have not given us the one thing a family needs, which is love, real love. You have made sure that we are safe because you care about our blood, because it is your blood, and you care about the fact that we bear your name, but you haven't given us the opportunity to be a real family. And I believe we can be if we start out new and fresh together. Here's my proposal. I will come back and live with you in Wildmount,

and I will lead this family to a new chapter. Our business model will change a bit. I propose that we do not engage in real estate anymore. But in another venture, forgive me, but you have sullied our name. Marianne at this point says, No, brother, you have, and you watch as Howard puts his hand out in front, puts his hand out in front and just dad hands are immediately,

and pushes her back, not stopping his gaze from you. His jaw clenches tight as he kind of clears his throat and his hands go back behind his body. The Darrington name is one of ill repute. We are scoundrels and we are land barons and we are awful people. And now we are penniless awful people, but I feel that we can fix it.

What I propose is this. Our home will be vacated by us. We are going to move to the farmhouse, where we will all live as a family. We will tend to the farm, and we will raise crops together. Our home will be turned into the Darrington Fund for charitable giving, where people who are down on their luck can come and live and get back on their feet.

Now, such a fund will need donors, and you have many contacts in the business world. You and possibly sister could run this foundation and spread goodness all over Wild Mount instead of badness and evil. There's a flash of movement. How quicker than you've seen your father move, he has grabbed a chair behind him and thrown it across the room, smashing it against the nearby wall. I take a step forward and just unsheatheathe a dagger an inch and say, we're gonna keep this civil today, aren't we? You have no right to talk to me.

You stand here in shame the work that I've done and given my life to secure and give to you and your sister and to uphold the mistakes that my father made the best of my ability and fix them. And you ought to in here after a year of adventuring. And just expect me to accept you throwing everything I've worked for into the sewer. The war is over and both sides lost.

Kingdoms were reduced to cinders and armies scattered like bones in the dust. Now the survivors claw to what's left of a broken world praying the darkness chooses someone else tonight. But in the shadow dark, the darkness always wins. This is old school adventuring and it's most cruel. Your torch ticks down in real time. and when that flame dies, something else rises to finish the job. This is a brutal rules-light nightmare with a story that emerges organically based on the decisions that the characters make.

This is what it felt like to play RPGs in the 80s, and man, it is so good to be back. Join the Glass Cannon podcast as we plunge into the Shadow Dark every Thursday night at 8 p.m. Eastern on YouTube.com slash the Glass Cannon with the podcast version dropping the next day. See what everybody's talking about and join us in the tour. Welcome to Mick Unplugged, the number one podcast for self-improvement and modern leadership. I'm Mick Hunt, your host, and I'm here to challenge your why and fuel your because. This is where leaders, entrepreneurs, and go-getters come to level up. Each week, I bring you unfiltered conversations, game-changing strategies, and the kind of motivation that transforms lives and legacies.

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and self-improvement. Let's get started. I didn't do that, Father, you did. It's gone. Everything is gone. You don't even own your own house anymore. It wouldn't be that way if you would have just married that girl. That's not going to happen. In my year of travel, I didn't just dilly-dally around the world having fun. I was learning about the world and about life and about family.

I was learning from these fine people what it means to really be a family and care about each other. I learned from Grog and Vax what it means to be a man and to be a father. I learned from Pike what it means to be a caring mother. I learned from Kiela what a real sister is like, one who loves you and cares for you. I learned from Vex what a best friend is like. These are things that you never gave us growing up. I even learned from Percival the type of man I would want to marry one day. And we never got that at home.

And from this day forth, I'm going to create a home, my home, that I own, that values and respects, the opinions of each family member, that cares for one another, where we stick up for each other and help each other through hard times, and not just rule by decree. If you don't want to be a part of this, that's fine.

You can leave my house. But I want you to stay. I need your counsel, and I need your help. And we need you as a father. I need you and sister to run this, foundation for me to repair our name and our reputation. It could be great. It could be the best thing that's ever happened to us. And there's more. I have an idea to create something else. A team of adventurers based here in Wildmount, the Darrington Brigade, led by me, Terry

and Darrington. We will fight for justice and win back. against evildoers and spread the Darrington name around the continent. I know I'm getting ahead of myself, but I feel like if we embarked on this new adventure together, it could save our name and repair our relationship. And I just, as a businessman, I'm asking you to consider it because your other options are, well, they're not great.

Make persuasion check. Speech. Speech. Speech. Speech. I'm gonna use luck. Your name, no one would know that you were forced out of your home.

Everyone knows, everyone thinks that this was your choice, that you're being charitable. I'm gonna see if the fates can help me. Oh, you're gonna use it now? You're gonna use it now? Oh my God. Cash it in, cash it in.

That's it. 25. 25. Yeah. Fuck. Singling. That's a moment to do it. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. You see as Maria, your mother, is now kind of moved to the side of Howard and is kind of holding his arms. Honey, there was no other path. This is a gift. And he kind of pulls his arm from her a little bit and gets to walk towards you. You watch his Mary Ann, who's been put on this very kind of shocked face, go kind of pale white. And for a moment, the facade. of the adult gives away to the child. Father, as he walks up to you, you watch as he brings his hand up

and just falls into his own hand and falls to his knees in the ground. And he's just shaking, he's quaking. You see as his fist is clenched there, and he slams it into the ground once, twice, a third time, each one just the resounding knock of him hitting bone and skin against wood. And he just does it again and again and again, all all the anger and fury being focused into this. As he finished, it stops you can see the blood

pouring from the side of the knuckles there, and his hand shaking. He stops and looks at it. And for the first time, not even the other evening, in which there was a sort of feigned softness to him that you have read through before and seen for the first time you see your father is a broken man. He looks up at you.

I lost everything. He looks back at Maria. Mary Ann to you, and dampness gathering down the side of his wrinkled cheeks, gathering across the stubble on his chin and vanishing amongst the cluster of thin, bristly facial hair. He looks about at this point. Now his focus anger subsided in this emotional moment, realizing that there are strangers at the table, and he kind of, please give us, his hand still like, Clustered there. Looks over to Berthold. Birdholt kind of ushers you all out front, you staying behind Terry and about ten minutes or so as you all are awkwardly kind of waiting outside in the quiet.

The cloudy day that it originally brought you into Diastok is breaking in places. You see hints of blue sky peeking through and a little bit of sunlight, occasionally finding its way across the cobble roads of the cityscape. You hear the occasional tweet of birds as they kind of jump from tree to tree. And in this silence, you really get to take in the surrounding beauty of this town, even as oppressive and gloomy as your arrival may have been and the tenseness of the work that you had to do in this space, you kind of allow yourself to realize that this is a nice town. You hear the door open once more from the front of the estate, and there you see Mary Ann, her just wet on the cheeks, she's wiping up. My father would like to speak to you if that's all right.

Yeah. She steps back in, and Howard comes back. He is more composed than he was before. He's back to his presentory self. When my son left, I was under the impression that his fanciful ideas would either break him and send him back to me to finally listen to what I had to teach if luck was with us, if not his fool's errand was bound to get him killed. It is by some miracle that he found you.

I don't know what's in store from my children, my wife, myself. There is a lot to discuss. decide, us as a family. And I'm still processing all of it. I'm sorry you got pulled into all of this, but I'm glad that you gave him your friendship. And I'm sorry you had to see this.

It's kind of hiding his bad hand under the good one. I'm sure in time I'll come to appreciate this. Out of desperation and obsession, I became my father. It's the only thing I promised I would never do. And I'm sorry. Looks back over his shoulder to Terry, who's a few people behind him. And he walks back into the house and just, well, kind of stops a little bit

and looks back over his shoulder towards you. Second, chances are a gift. I pray you don't squander it. You're not the first man to panic the loss of his shackles. I hope you eventually enjoy the freedom that you've just been given from your legacy. Legacy. Nick continues walking into the house.

May I have your hand, please? He stops as he's kind of point. I'm sorry, I want. May I have your hand, not in marriage? I voted that strangely. Just your hand that's hurt. He's still clutching and hiding it, and he gives you a look of understanding what you're asking.

He goes, I appreciate the offer, but this needs to hear. This needs to heal on its own. Understood. This pain shouldn't be fleeting when he walks away inside. I have a question. Is there any more stew? I don't know. My stomach is like making noise of them so hungry.

I feel like we could find better stew. Yeah, let's go. No offense. No offense. What's anything. So. Oh, yes. My place is here.

My place is here. I'm coming back to Whitestone with you. I have to. I have to retrieve Doty and my personal belongings. We just finished your room. Well, I'll come visit. I was thinking, for my Darrington Brigade, I'll need lots of recruits, and maybe I could get some down

in Whitestone. You know, fine fighters and young trainees. I even have an idea for my first adventuring partner. I think if I sold my old armor, I could afford that drow for a year. And she lives close by. This is a lot. I don't think that's a half bad idea.

And we're all very proud of you. Very impressive. I understand legacy and responsibility, and I think it's very admirable for you to recognize your place. I've always known that I've always known that I was not fit to travel with you all. And I know that you all love me,

but you don't really like me that much. Oh, I can be a kind of a dick sometimes. I like it, I liked it. That's why you get in. A year ago, it was definitely true. What about the bakery? No. No, I love for so much.

Oh, the bakery. Yeah. I'm really bad at baking too. No, but you're so good at selling stuff. You're so bad. Yeah, I am. I feel like some people come in just to like see you and you're definitely the face guy.

You can. You're the good salesman. Sure, sure, that makes sense. You can sell anyone on a shitty cake that you baked. I'll come down and visit a lot. What's a lot? You know, once every year. That's terrible.

Around Winterscrest. Well, I mean, it's a long way and I can't trees stride whatever you call it. I can come get you. Listen, let's not do this now. I'm coming back with you. I have to go get my robot, all right? Well, don't expect us to be okay with this.

That's not going to happen. I mean, to be fair, Terry does have a point. I also have a responsibility. You're leaving too? Well, technically. I'm the chief of my people. Oh my god, are we all breaking up? No, I'm going to.

No, no. We're not doing this now. What's happening? What is happening? We need eggs and coffee. I didn't think this was gonna happen. No, there's no more discussion until there's food and caffeine. This is madness.

We're just hungry. We're just hungry. This is hunger talking. We're just hungry. We're just having a lack of coffee. Everybody needs to calm down. We need brunch. All right, we get brunch back at like,

Wattstone, right? get out of here. Let's go to White Stone. Yeah, we can get into sleep. Yeah, let's show him like what it is. He's going to be leaving. Yeah, I mean, for real, we've got to get back pretty soon. Yeah, let's go then. All right. You don't say one word. No, you shut up. I need to go say goodbye to Mama. That's it. That's it. Then I can go. She can come into White Stone anytime.

Any other way. She literally has no money to travel there. We can make it happen. It's not. All right. Well, say go you're goodbye. All right, all right. I'll go find. I'll go find. I'll go find. I'll go Fine, mom. Okay. She's inside right now, and you can, as you walk inside, she's just kind of sitting at the table where everyone had breakfast and she's just eating what was on her plate. Just alone. Turns around. Mama, I'm sorry to spring all this on you and I must go back to White Stone with my friends

to tie up some loose ends, but I'll be back soon, days, maybe a week. Be back, please. In the meantime, though, can you think about something for me? Of course. What do you need? The charity. Papa and sister can run it. They have a smarter business acumen than I do. But the brigade.

I was wondering if you wanted to do it with me. You have a taste for adventure. You could help sort of be our manager, kind of like, tend to us when we're in. tend to us when we're injured. Terry and I'm far too old for adventure. I don't think that's true. It's like an organizer?

Yeah, yeah. Yes, yes. Remember in escape from Brave Mountain? Yes. Yes. Remember the kindly old wizard who stayed back. Drya, yes, yes. And tended to the injured and fed them

when they were sick with them. that mystical plague that they got. Right, right. Yes. You could be that old place. Could be Dariah. Yes, yes. No, no, I.

Think about it. Read the book again, and when I come back, we'll talk. All right. But if you're going out and you're coming back and to help back a better outfit. Oh, okay. Do you have a color in mind? Royal blue.

On it. I give her a big hug. She gives a big hug, and as she hugs you, her mouth gets near your ear, and she goes, She listened. Mama, this is going to be fun. And she kind of like sniffles a bit and pushes your way. Go, go, hurry back. Be safe. Maybe.

All right, let's go. Do we assume the fold of clouds? Oh, no, this is probably a tree stride. Yeah. Situation. Oh, so cool. Let's do that. Would have been a very long cloud stride.

Is that even a possible? to cloud stride. It's possible. It's just going to be a long journey. Tree stride. Transport via plants. That's what? That one. Tree stride is a very different spell. Sorry, so I can do tree stride. The sixth level, tells support.

It has a much. I know what you mean, that's, that's not mean. Transfer via plants. It's very funny. It is. Tree stride just rolls off the tongue easier. I know it does. That's why it's lower.

Plant walk. Tree trip. Sure. Tree tri-trib. Tree Uber. Treecicle. Trouber. Treebler.

Leaf. Trift. Sorry. Faulted people. Bought and a port. All right, so you find the nearest large tree and with a quick snap of your fingers a flash of druidic energy you watch as the tree forms splits open or within the doorway on the other side, the main thoroughfare of Whitestone. You step through and find yourself back in your home city. On the way out, I give Sun Tree a little like, like kind of a little, our secret handshake.

Judah's strike? Yeah, you just killed the tree. Du-to-do-to-baw. Du-Bah. Quivering palm to Sun-Tree. Sun-Tree is still doing it the first time. Three years ago. So slow.

All right, so you knock on the Sun Tree a little bit. Continue walking. First thing you can catch your attention. The main square of White Stone, largely around the Sun Tree, is fairly empty, except for like a few cards, mostly for traversing in the There's a small garden that's kind of in the early stages of being set around. As you walk into the main area, you notice that there's a lot of carts that are circled in the north end of it, like a small caravan of sorts.

You see a series of wagons or some horses that are tied off at a couple hitching posts off to the side, and you see what appear to be tents and tables with various wares for sale, fruits, vegetables, some exotic cloths and tapestries and clothing available. Is this a festival? Sir Traffing Salesman? My god, it's a shopping episode. I'm so excited.

It just appeared out of nowhere. You need to have something in royal blue. We're going to buy so many imaginary things, Travis. What's happening, though? Really? No, really? What is happening? Oh, really? What's happening? You don't recognize any of these people necessarily.

I'm finding a guard. There's no reason. There's no calendar element to it. And as you kind of walk up one of the nearest pale guard, Hell Guard, just kind of doing a walkthrough. What? So what's this all about? Oh, Percival.

Now that the trade routes are open, we're having more caravans to and from Imman. It's a farmer's market! Essentially. We're just keeping the peace. It's been several years why you should be even vaguely surprised by this reaction is. It's baffling to me.

It's baffling that you are so comfortable with it still. Excellent. Excellent. Carry on, carry on, keep shopping. Of course, of course. That's a farmer's market. Hi! I'm gonna walks off. They have been briefed, I don't know.

Do you guys want to walk around them? There's a farmer's market. Yes! I need some fresh halibate right now! Are they selling or are they just setting up? At this time, they're selling. And then you see some of the populace that come out. You can see, you can see.

delicious fruits, some swamp roots, and there's something like herbal setups that have things that are from Stillben and things that are not indigenous to the White Stone area. Are there heirloom tomatoes? Make an investigation check. Oh, Jesus. See, I'm used luck, no, man. No, no, I'm kidding. Best luck use ever. I don't, I think they're all heirloom tomatoes.

There's no such thing. You find some nice tomatoes. Oh. They're real tasty-looking tomatoes. Somebody's heirloombs, they're mine. We're also in Tanger. They grow one. You find there's one kind of oddity shop that has small

bobbles and little jewelry-like trinkets that they have for sale. Oh, yes. There's a lot of dried meats. There's no fresh fish, because a lot of the fishing that's done locally doesn't travel very well on caravan. Is there flowers? Is there a flower shop? There is no flower shop on the caravan. There is a flower shop in Whitestone.

Right. but it's not like, you don't need to travel to bring flowers, and so they don't think very well. I assume the castle's going to be doing a round of this anyway, but I want to see the trinkets. Okay. You walk up and you see a number of delightful things. I want to go with oddities with my...

You see a small rack of various vials, glass vials with various colored liquids inside that are kind of, some of them seem to be swirling as the individual, the guy who's selling it, which as you walk up, you see this gentleman, it's kind of in his early 40s, this long, almost handlebar must that curls past the edges of his jaw, his hair is combed over to one side and slicked down.

And as you approach, he's like, huh, hi, yes, I've heard of you, your Vox-Mochina. Well, if I was a team looking for, the things I have to sell, it would be you. He's dead drunk. Probably. Now.

And he immediately goes into a spiel, when you watch some of the other carts nearby, I begin to kind of roll their eyes a little bit. So, Vox Machia, first off, how I'm doing with a pleasure. Quite impressively, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Theobold Cans, by the way, that's my name. Keep it in mind.

Theobold Cans. Cans. Like the festival. Yeah, just go with it. The Theobold Festival, it's very, very popular. I have here quite a very popular. Quite a few interesting things that may help you on your journeys. Here, pulls up one of the vials and kind of swirls it for a second.

It has this kind of orangeish, yellowish color to it, and as it flows around inside, it has a thick movement to it, like a syrup. He goes, this liquid upon being imbibed, will temporary allow you to see, read, and speak any language. Oh, shit. You like? That's very impressive. Isn't it though? So I'll put that one aside as a possible, yes. Is that for real that one?

Oh yes, I should identify that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll identify that. Okay, as you've got a glance over and take a moment to concentrate. Yes, it is a potion of tongues. Okay, great. Thank you. Reminding me that I do that.

Now these, you might be interested in. He pulls up what appears to be a set of goggles with these thick, like, crystal lenses the front. He goes. Now, these, these fit over your eyes and upon activation they have the chance of dazzling somebody and calling them a friend for some time. Sounds familiar. All right. In the maybe pile. This, this is, and at this point, He's in the middle of this conversation. You can't help you specifically vex.

You glance over your shoulder as you see the crowd kind of parting off to the side and there's a large figure, like kind of be-lining in your direction. I nudge my brother next to me and I show him, I head nudge him, so he is. You glance over and you see as the crowd's being parted, you see it like a seven foot tall,

not quite grog level, but comparable imposing figure, just coming right towards you. You see a darker kind of olive skin appears to be a set of half-plate armor, no sleeves, just plate on the chest and elements on the legs. You see short hair, it's kind of buzz on the sides with like a curl of dark in the front, that kind of Superman-esque curls in the front. You see a big, broad smile, a tusked smile. You see orcish blood in this figure as it approaches with a big sword across the back. Take an instinctive step forward just to half step in the We don't have to shop anymore.

As the figure rushes up, apparently drawn by the sound of the phrase Vox Machina. John, if you want to go there. No one can see you. We know it's there, though. Yeah. Yes. There's an enchantment on it. It's actually this big. Oh, got it. Yep, welcome to it.

Oh God, it doesn't. It's much bigger than Hardwick. That's far. Oh, my God. So, as you have been in the process of specifically keeping an eye out for a group of individuals, for a group of individuals, specifically looking out for the name or any mention of Vox Machina.

You've spent a number of hours to know luck and kind of frustrated, but made some friends and talking around, and then suddenly you hear someone shout the name from a distance, and you glance over and see a cluster of individuals that match the descriptions you were given. So you immediately beeline up to them, and you watch as two.

Similar-looking half-elves kind of spin and give you the evil eye. Get off, man. Hey, friend. Hi. look like you're headed this way. Did you? Can we help you? Need something. Yes. I'm looking for some help. Oh, wow, yeah? All right, all right.

What kind of help? With you so far. I'm with a group of these guys and we, well, we have a bit of problem back in our Homeland. Which is where? I have a problem with memory. Do you remember your name? It's the phrase day drinking. I was already come up today.

Well, my name is Lionel Gayhart, but most people call me Chod. Chod. Chod? Well, that was my born name, but I call myself Lionel Gayhart. That's a better name. It is a much better name. On the end is hard. It's hard. Gay hard.

Gay heart. Heart. Yeah. People call them Joad. Gay hard. Got it. Lionel. Right.

Right. But, so yeah, we've been having some problems, and we need some help. What kind of problems? Like opening a peanut butter jar or like how big is a trouble you go? Or like, like, dragon kind of issue. kind of issue. Yeah. Oh, well, more like creepy guys

in a big group issue. I'm with this, a guy, you guys, you've heard of, he's pretty big in our parts. You've heard of the Meat Man? Are you fucking shit, mate? You?

You guys know him? Yeah, we know him. Oh, I thought he was just big in our parts, but. Where are you from? Is this what's happening right now? Are we all paying attention at this point? Because I was kind of.

It's hard to miss this guy show up. I'm trying to ignore it. Now I'm failing. I want to throw something again at Sam. I'm like. Is Short Holt around right now? Is this a prank? Is that what this is?

Is this a joke? I don't know jokes. Inside check. Inside check. Yeah. That's fine. That is, no, it's not fine. That's better.

14. He seems pretty lost on the name Shorthold, but seems to be up front with his intent. So wait, he does know jokes or he does know the Meat Man. I know the Meat Man. But you don't know jokes? I don't know jokes. How do you know the Meat Man? Do you know Parchment Boulder Shears?

Oh. Never mind. The Meat Man is, he's my boss. What? What? What? Wait, wait, wait, what does he look like? Short guy?

No, well, he's shorter than me, but you know. How much shorter than he? Where on yourself does he come? Like is he this size? She's a gnome. No, no, he's bigger than that. Excuse me? What?

It's the meat man. You guys seem familiar with him. You know what he looks like. Is this a me man we know? No, not know. Is he pulling a Dread Pirate Robert? Wait. It's not the meat man that we know.

We don't know, maybe it is. Where are you from? Does he wear a parade? I'm from an area where it's, well, we're from the desert, it's like a desert area. But we've traveled across, it's very, very far away. It was a long journey. Market?

Did you cross the ocean to get here? Yes, we crossed the ocean. We were on those wooden things that had like. The ships. Yes, ships, that's it. Okay. On Correlle. Bigger than Marquette?

On Karel. We're getting closer. Oh my God, oh my God. Okay, wait. Is your boss with you right now? Did he come with you or did he send you? Yeah, I know. I'm with him. Well, he said he was around here somewhere.

Shut the fuck up. He's here right now. Why? Is that bad or good? No, real good thing. It's a real good thing. Yeah. Yeah. Will you bring us to him? Well, yeah. I need your help. So we need your help.

Yeah. I'm kind of as messenger. I was supposed to find some. Hang on. This is your first time being a messenger, is you? I don't mean any offense here, but I was in the middle of a transaction. We are totally loitering now.

Sir? Yeah. We'll take the tongue potion. How much? How much? Come on, give it, give it to me. Just come on. Seven, seven thousand gold pieces.

What? Whoa. I don't have that much. You don't have that much. They don't have my face. What was the third one though? The one you were about to say, we were gonna hear you say it, but we did it. Before you were so strangely interrupted.

That would be... This is very important, but... You didn't have it, did you? I mean, yeah, this kind of... There's a ring. A ring? What does you do? It allows you to move freely.

Is it under a thousand gold? No! Then, good-bye! We're moving. We're moving. Okay, out of his storefront. Wait, Chod. Chod. Chod. Chod. Chod. Chod? Chod. Chod? Chod. Chod. What are you saying?

But please, please call me Lionel. Chaud. Oh, you're lying. Yes, of course. Lionel's much better. I probably should have told you me really. It's Lionel. Chaud has been a special and a disappointment. Can we call you Lion for short? That's fierce. Yeah. Okay. Cool. I'm Keyless. I might get confused if you call me lion though. I'm just warning you. I get the feeling you're going to get confusing if we call you Lionel. It's Percival. It's a pleasure. Yeah. Hello. Hello. Terry and Darrington. You're a fancy lad.

That's Vex. Vex. Yes. This is going to be difficult. Oh wow. Just say Vex. What's your name? Vex? And your name's Vex too? Yes. It is. It is. You can call her little elf girl and you can call me a little elf boy. Just ask a question, boy. Yeah. Could we meet your boss? We're okay with that now. All right. All right.

Wait. Hold on, Park got a question. Well, just, what do you, what, why is he your boss? What do you do? What kind of work are you in? Oh, you know, we do various things. I round up, he likes to, you know, he likes to make sure everybody's, you know, in line back in our area. Sometimes he makes me make sure people pay up.

Wait a minute, so he's like a bad guy. No, he's a good guy. Are you a bouncer? Is he playing music and you're his bouncer? Do you rough up people who try to cause trouble? Well, you know, in the nicest way possible sometimes. Sure, sure. That's what I do. Do you know someone named Kaylee?

Kaylee? Yeah. No. But do you know a girl that looks kind of like the meat man? I don't talk to many girls. Oh, yeah, your girl, I'm sorry. Well, I'm talking to you. That's awesome. Hey, that's great.

That's great. That might be a first amount. Rift is a known. Oh my god. But I forgot. So I'm supposed, I wasn't supposed to call him Meat Man. He's more, but in these areas, he's known as Ais Aidan. Ace Aidan.

Ace Aidan. I think that's what he said. Ace Aiden. But he's actually the Meat Man. Yeah, and that's out of the bag. So we get to meet the meat man today. Yeah, we need your help. We want to meet.

But I'm just checking you guys out first because he said I'm a real good judge of character. What do you think? That's the first thing we read off. What do you judge on us? Oh, you guys seem really nice. Yeah, you seem really great too. You should probably take us to him then.

So nice. Yeah, it's nice to have to go do something with people where I don't have to hurt him. Oh. Yeah. We kind of feel the same way sometimes. That's great. So he didn't send you here to hurt us.

No, no, no. Yeah, well, we need to enlist your help. Hang on a second. Were you like earmuffs? He knows what earmuffs are. That's good. I'm not surprising you think so far. Anyway, why would Scanlan send a messenger? He has the gate stones.

And why him? Scanlan's smarter than not, right? Why? Scanin's trying to play us and he accidentally sent someone that... Chode? Dianol. Who's the guy? Ace Aiden. Ace Aiden?

I don't think it's Scalind. It's got to be Scanlan. Look, a lot of people could go by the alter ego, meat man. What other Gudeau would name themselves meat man? That's a good point. And I'm also just going to put out there that we all know that we're going to go do this, because we're desperate for anything to put off the inevitable goodbyes that we were heading towards. So let's distract ourselves for a little bit.

And fucking Scanlan. We'll see. Look, he's still doing it. He does follow direction. direction. If I were to trick us, that's how I would trick us. Lionel. They're done with their conversations.

Oh, I was having such a nice story in my head. What is it? What do you guys want? You are very likable. You have problems talking to people, to women even. I know, I'm really good at talking myself sometimes. That's where I get most practice. It shows. Yeah. It's quite a bit of practice.

Well, let's meet this chat. Yeah, let's go meet him. All right, so. You watch as you're led by this lumbering oaf of a half-ork who has a spring in his step and a perpetual smile. And everyone around just can't help but watch him as he goes. He exudes this natural force of personality in spite of himself. And people are just enthralled or spooked or just trying to figure out what the heck this individual is. that's now talking and walking with a very confused-looking voxmachina. He leads you along to the southern side of Whitestone,

talking about his tales of growing up around Ancurel and Marquette and any other tales he wishes to express along the way. But eventually leads you to one of the ends in the south side of the city. The interior is empty. There is nobody in there. in there. It is just devoid of any people working there. You recall because you were told to pay everybody to leave. Yeah. Yeah. But he was here, so yeah. I don't know, you guys like make yourself comfortable. This is the craziest 48 hours, I swear to all the gods.

No, it's cool. Ace Aidan has the best mutton. He keeps it normally, I don't think I think I made the mutton leaves, so you can check the drawers. I'll go search for mutton. In drawers? Yeah. I'm not going to eat any mutton from drawers. He gave me free rate, I'm searching this fucking place. You start pulling through the drawers.

There is a piece of mutton in there. You get the sense that it wasn't stored there, more than maybe it was half eaten and left there for later. That's all he remembered. That's weird. 25 perception, I don't know, I'm just looking around. Yeah, I'm looking for weirdness and Okay, the investigation check you guys. I don't know.

No. Oh my goodness. Should I be investigating too or? Yeah, you pay. It's on you. Sure. So what did you get? Not good. No.

24. Up and out. 11. Okay. You find the partially eat mutton. Vax. It's, you find the tavern has many drinks on tap. It has a number of cups. It looks to be remnants of people that were possibly eating or finishing a meal that quickly left.

Yeah. And the coffers for the tavern are gone. No traces of poo anywhere. No traces of poo, no. Scandlan! Scadlin! Are you here? You hear footsteps coming down a stairway on the far end of the tavern. Who's Scanlan? He's this really creepy weirdo they always talk about.

No, I don't think there's a little creepy weirdo they always talk about. There's a Scanlan here now. He watched as an imposing figure makes his way down the stairs. As he turns around the corner, the light comes in, you see a human man, very, very tan skin. His body is thick with muscles, and it's just imposing by just his via stance. His shoulders are forward a little bit, his fists clenched to the side. You see a dark leather vest that is affixed to the torso and a hood attached to it that hides elements of his appearance. But you do see long, stringy black hair that kind of cascades

out the front. And as it turns around, you see a very craggy, pock-marked face adorned by a thick black mustache. A deep scar sits in his face under one eye. And you see as one hand is kind of rested on this curved jeweled dagger that sheathed on one side. Turns around, walks over to one of the far tables, pulls the chair out. spins it around, sits in it and rests on it. Where come, France? You're a Vox-Markiner, yes? Mm.

He was asking. Sit down, please. If you don't mind, you're a guest of mine right now. Roll a perception, I wanna see if it's an illusion, if it actually is Scanlan. Make an investigation check. I told you, I don't know that's Scandlin. Good job.

He flicks your gold coin. 25. 25. Whispers. Incoming whisper. The Scanlan short hauled t-shirts are available on the store right now. Travis is wearing one. You can see it maybe on your screen.

He's doing a little jig. Boop-a-boop-boop-boop-boop. Buy your shirts today. The hottest penguin I ever saw. My name is A.S. Adon. Told you. I'm but a humble merchant from Ankorel. Montcarel. And I'm seeking to make some contacts here in this,

rumored emerging metropolis of White Stone. Yes? Yes. Yes. Now, I have information that may be of use to you, like compatriots have told me. Should my gatherers and whisperers be correct? In trade, I would like to get some information from this one. Possibly? What is it that you want to know? Rumors tell me of these fabled riflemen of Whitestone. Yes.

While paltry mechanical imitations have occasionally come across the markets on our side of the world, I hear that you were the designer of these instruments of death. Oh no. I am. Well, in the intent of the intent of the of expanding my influence and keeping the peace where I do business, I would like to make a trade.

This important information for you to grant me access to your designs. What is this information? You don't even need to tell me what it is, but that would be worth quite a lot and what you knew would have to be worth quite a lot. I'm selling a secret recipe, man. Let's say that information has come to my attention, regarding a hidden location, compatriot of mine whom you've already met, recently returned from an expedition I sent him on,

where he stumbled upon a pyramid. A pyramid. A pyramid. Yes. Is this peak you're interested? Oh, no. This means a pyramid? Wait. This is the information I have to offer.

Wait, he said Marquette though. Yeah. Another one. Did you go inside of it? No. No. Did you see anybody around it? Did you see anything about it?

Yeah. I would request you hold that information until we make a deal. Sorry, Ace. No, no, you could go ahead and tell us. Yeah, no. He's my boss. Does it count if it's a girl that he's talking to? He's talking to? I mean, it's not quite the same, right? Silence. My deal is with you, Voxmokina.

What is this worth? How? You should listen to him. I guess it depends on what he thinks it's worth to us. What makes you think that we want this information so much? I've had a compatriot of yours stumble through my city seeking information about apparently Something beneath your city. The whispers come to me. I saw a connection.

From what I hear, you've put quite a bit of energy into this darkened orb. Well, this leaves me with a bit of a conundrum. Traditionally, when people come either asking to see my designs or if we come across people who have been attempting to replicate them, We just simply have them executed on site, traditionally. I would not recommend that.

Well, if I were going to do it, it would have already been done now, wouldn't have it? Let's not pretend. I don't know. What about that? Remember, enchantment. Mm-hmm. Thank you, John. I think that was a threat.

That was a threat. That was a very good, that was a very good threat. Really? Was it? It was definitely a strong sex. It's talking to hear about this compatriot. How do we know you're not selling us a song? Who is this compatriot of ours?

What? He said someone came through. He's talking about this guy? No. No. No. It's flying all you guys. I do not meet this individual,

but apparently they belong on the council of your country. What? What? A little bit more, please. Blondevere. traverses through arcane means. What do you say? The first part?

Man a woman. Gilmore? No, he's not on the castle. Alara. Blonde of hair. Alora. Well. What is happening?

She went to go find information about it. That's not strange. What is the meat man? What is the meat man? Mean to you. Man. Kind of leans back and you see, takes the dagger out and just kind of spins it a little bit

on the fingertip. The meat man is before you. I don't know where you heard this title, but. I told you guys, it's AIS. Ayes, yes. There will be a conversation later. Oh no. But that is a business alias of mine

that I've had for a short time. You don't need to get upset with him for it. We just... We had a friend. Yeah. Also, like we thought it might have been him. So we could like talk about it. Sorry.

There is no with a meat man. No. I mean, it's kind of a sticking point for us. You're coming to us with one piece of information that we may be interested in, but you're accidentally tipping your hand towards something else that we want to know about. We know a meat man and he is not you. Do you know the meat man?

Do you know the muffin man? This meeting is only happening because we were hoping to meet our meat man. Yeah. If you were referring to the small one, he has been dealt with. The title is now mine. Delt with.

Roll back a step or two. Yeah. Dealt with how? Doubt with in the way that anyone who does sloppy business imprisonment no longer of consequence. Imprescent. He was next in line.

I'm sorry, I just. You think that the title of Meat Man is so important that you had to kill, like, or an attack a gnome that also went by Meat Man? You do have a man who is fight over ground. The Meat Man I take the title from was not killed by me. It was a great man, small, but resolute, confident, handsome as they come.

Mm-hmm. And he taught me everything I know. It is a shame that he has been lost in chains beneath the city, but I am keeping up. Such a shame that he's been lost. Hmm. So you've taken on the title of yourself? I have. In his memory. And what city is he in chains beneath? Beneath Honorel on its deepest prisons.

Did he tell you to take on his name? No. It was bequeathed by the others left behind in his absence. So you didn't meet the meetback. respect me. And as such, the meedman is I. The name was simply meted out. He's totally dread pirate Robert seeing this shit. The designs to the guns are out of the question. That doesn't mean that there aren't things on the table.

If not the designs, perhaps a few rifles and some ammunition. Something I could take back to my workers. Here's a question. Why did Alora come to you for information? Oh, she didn't come to me. Me, but whispers came to me that she was seeking this information. Right. So you have ears in all the right places. Everywhere, my dear. You have two years.

You said workers? Are you a foreman of some sort? You could say that. I run a business in various goods. Some legal. And I make sure the clients get them in a very forthright manner. We are sadly very protective of our copyrights. And my designs are not for reproduction. Attempts of reproducing them tend to end poorly. Many have tried, most have failed. If you wanted, perhaps, if you've designed,

that could have been a conversation, but so far I'm not impressed by you. Well, we have nothing more to be discussed then. Come, Chod. Sean. Okay, see you guys later. No, but before you go, no, no. Prison, what was this other meat man's offense? Do you know?

I don't know. You don't know anything. No, I don't know a lot of stuff. He doesn't tell me. Do you like working for that guy? Yeah, he's great. He gives me money and food and mutton. What if we gave you money and food and mutton?

We have mutton. How much money does he give you? We could get mutton. Terrell. No, I like working for him. What? He keeps me safe. What about this guy?

What about this guy? I mean, you gotta start somewhere. Oh, yeah. I feel like I could do better than... You were roughly I should do earmuffs right now, yeah. Yeah, I'm pretty sure I can do better than this guy. I mean, he's really imposing and strong.

He could be perfect. Also, guys, not to split hairs here, but his boss is literally right there listening to us. So maybe we shouldn't be talking about recruiting his employee. I really am actually quite... Your shiny friend has a point. I'm quite surprised. I'm quite surprised by the brazeness. What on earth made you think that we would sell these designs to you?

Well. You obviously are paying attention. As you would hopefully know, the intent of negotiation is to aim high. That's fair. Then bring your expectations. So, perhaps not plans. Perhaps- But a few rifles, a pistol or two and some ammunition would be enough to outfit my team.

A whole team with one pistol. One pistol can do quite a bit. One pistol can go far. The problem is that once he has the design, it's easy to replicate it. I'll reverse engineer it. I don't think you'd be able to reverse engineer it. They are all already out there.

But I have my artisans in my disposal. Wait, why did you think you would want this information? If you don't want it. I'm happy to leave. Make some business here, some gold, and then be on my way. But I was informed that you, Voxmachina, so widely respected, so widely respected, So strong, so rich, so involved in yourselves, in your worldwide endeavors that perhaps a little more

world saving might be up your alley, but maybe I thought you wrong. How is giving you one of my weapons world saving? Because the information I give you in return may help save the world. You talk like you sound, you sound like you know about the stakes involved. Just what I've been whispered. We've met a lot of doomsiers. You're sure you can stand up to them. I'd go tired of this conversation. If this is a declination?

Well, at the very least is a conversation of whether or not you're ever going to do business in this city again and what that business is going to look like. Do not worry. You will not see this face in your precious white stone again. Can I do like a... Can I do an insight check to see if I can gleam any... and he more than what he knows about his world ending thing?

Okay, let's head check. Natural, 20. Oh, good. Whispers. Hear moffs, hear moff. Everybody here, maps. I mean, Terry, Grog is about as smart as a golden retriever, and he does great.

I know, but this guy seems like he would... Sometimes you just lose a spelling bee to Grog. That's really dumb. Well, Grog, you know, up until a few weeks ago, Grog couldn't really spell either. We could hold a spelling bee. That's true. He can hold a B. Is he still walking away? He's going over to the half work, and she goes, come on, we're leaving. I look at the, I look at Vex and Vax and then when I say, we know him. Give it a moment. There's something familiar about him. I go and I follow him.

Okay, he walks out. He knows more than he's letting on. Come. All right, I'm coming. You guys should really reconsider, that's a word he just told me. I mean, he sounds scary and all, but it's really awesome stuff he has to share if you guys just shared back.

Okay, see it. Pass without a train. I just follow him right out of the room. Okay, both of them walk out into the daylight and you follow. Yes. Seems around. Yes.

I'll run up and I hug him. Okay. Full body? Just a big hug. And I go down. Okay. Immediately he stickily backs up and you watch as Vex's arms passed through the legs and thighs and grab on something smaller on the inside. Motherfucker!

Stop! Stop, stop, stop, stop. Not here, not here. Let's go somewhere else. Now, let's go. What? What? What is this happened?

Motherfucker! Motherfucker! Let's go and take a break. You're going to get you! Motherfuck! Well done, Sam. Well done, you. All right, we're going to take a quick break.

We're right back here in a minute to pick this up. We're going to go ahead and have a Twitch giveaway in the chat room for this awesome worm. Awesome, wormwood complete system. This includes a dice tray, a dice box, A couple fun things. It's Zebelwood, which is nice. But to win this, you have to go into the Twitch chat. The code for this is Bardbarian. B-A-R-D, B-A-R-I-A-N. Barbarian, but with Bard-B-Barian. Cool. So, we'll see you guys back here in a few minutes. You son. Oh my God! Hello guys, and welcome back to the night's episode of Critical Role.

You're a bitch! So, picking up where we left off, Lionel, you just watched as this half elf girl just forcefully merged with part of your boss, and your boss starts freaking out, as everyone else kind of you all spook in mid-daylight as you hear this familiar voice come through saying, what'd you say again?

They were all there? I thought she just fell out. We were not there. Oh, it was just you. You guys are still inside the tavern. Is Lionel there, though? Yeah, he left with him. I was following with him. Okay. Lionel, please, go back inside.

What'd you do? What'd you do? Go back inside the tavern. Where's Ace? Where's Ace? I'm still he. Please, go back inside the tavern. Okay. Wait for me there. They were nice people anyways. All right. So Vex, you're now there staring at the Denny Trejo-like visage of the Meat Man. I'll grab her by the hand and pull her into,

is there a back alley or a side place or a shadow anywhere? There's maybe about 15 feet off a little alley you could duck into you. Come with me. Of course. So when we're safely off the street, I take off the hat of disguise and reveal myself. Hi. I thought you were going to reveal yourself to everyone. Which you do notice, Scanlan, definitely Tanner's skin, that scar you saw under the eye, still there on Scanlan.

And the clothing and the outfit design is much more Marquisian than you recall. Definitely more Gilmore than Scan. Have you been there the whole time? Not the whole time. full time, but for much of it. I didn't know if I could talk to you all. I hold his hand and just listen. There's a lot to talk about, but not here. I have to, I have appearances to keep up. I have people depending on me who work for me. Are you really the meat man there?

I am many things. Darling. Well, I am. Okay. Yes, I am. But it's not what you would think. I'm not a bad guy. This is not the place to talk about this.

Listen to me. Vex, there will be a time to discuss this, but right now I'm casting Modify Memory on you. Don't you do it. Don't you do it. I push him against the wall. Make a- Can I break it before he does it?

Make a wisdom saving throw. Actually, no. For this time, I have to ask you guys, both roll initiative, actually. That's what's going to come down to. Come on, come on. Dice. Dice is not good.

Yes! Actual dice roll in the game. 24. Six. Okay. Okay. So, he begins, after saying this, begin casting the spell. No, I grab his hands and cover his mouth.

Okay. I'll say go make a concentration check. So make a constitution saving throw. I'm going to have you Let's see, for this, just roll a D20. Constitution saving throw. Yes. Roll D20 and add your Dex modifier to it. Dex modifier or Dex Saving throw?

Dex modifier. Oh. No. No. No. Oh. So, that's right. So as you go to push them into the wall,

you go and slam, but you accidentally hit between where his foot in the edge of the stone is, and it causes you to stumble forward and slam him. You fall over, you in the process, she hits you in the side of the- Do we accidentally kiss? Is that what's gonna happen here? Almost, but instead, you both accidentally

end up elbowing the shit at of each other. She falls over, you tumble over her and become this like tangled pile of soreness. The spell is lost. Damn it! However, you guys in the tavern, hear a against the wall on the outside. I was starting.

You can't tell them. You can't talk to fucking too. Holy shit! I hear that I start walking out. Holy shit! Shut up, shut up, shut up. Shish! I run into the alley.

I bust through right behind back. You did it. You guys all rush around to the alley. I walk. Now I run. I knew you were familiar. Shut up, shut up, shut up. If you need to do something, change back, do it.

How long does the hat take? I mean, it takes an action to do the. Okay, hat on. Yeah. Appearances are important. I make my way through. What's going on? No one talks about Scanlan being as handsome as much as Scanlan does.

That was your first giveaway, mister. We're in an alley though off to the side, right? Yeah, you're in like a dark alley right on the, on the... I'm giving a big fucking hug. Hard to do, but yes. I watch it. So Lionel, everyone just charges out of the tavern, you hear a big commotion and voices on the side. What's going on, you guys? What's happening?

Can I... I think they're attacking him. At this point, you watch the other one is now grabbing him, like merging. It looks like they're attacking. So I... Oh, I can't. I want to protect him. Okay. As he should...

So, what are you going to do to protect him? You go ahead and just say, like... Are you going to scare him off? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want to... Kill him? Yeah, yeah. No. No, no, no, no.

I like you. I want to, yeah, I want to scare him away and like. Do you have any ability that does that? I think I know where to do this. Or you can just try and intimidate us and say something really scary or just make some noise. Yeah, yeah. I want to do the, I'm going to do the frantic flail. Aha! Okay, all right. So as you're hugging him, you guys watch as the half-or turns the corner,

spooks, and then suddenly you watch as, like, something that's the armor kind of glows briefly. And he starts flapping his wings, his arms, going, going, hunk, ha, huck! Right at you, I need you to make a wisdom saving throw. What? It'll be explained later. Does it have anything to do with charm or sleep by any chance? No.

No, okay. All right. Oh, that's fine. 20. Okay, so it doesn't spook you off. It's just a little weird. It's a giant man. It doesn't work every time. It's talking and waving and clapping his arms at you.

It doesn't seem to be affected by. It just kind of gives you a strange look. Yeah. It's okay, stand down, Lionel. I can defend myself. Because you know I'm good for, that normally works not everybody else. You are my best man. And I appreciate your concern.

But these people pose no threat to us. That is a really good accent. Yeah, you're so good at that. What are they talking about accent? They are beguiled by our foreign ways, and they are scared of what they do not understand. True. That's true. I'm going to start walking back to the inn,

and I'm going to start pouring a lot of drinks and starting the table. I do have information to share with you. We want to hear all of that information. You still gotta give us the designs. No? No. I mean.

Why did you want the designs? Percival's guns are really cool, cool and I've always wanted to have some of my own and I used all of my ammunition over the year and now I just have this pistol and I produce the pistol. But it has no bullets. I don't know how to make any more bullets. I need more bullets. Are you a mafia Don Scalman? Are you a bad guy? I'll take off the hat. Okay.

Lionel, you watch as your boss for the past five months. Ships of this tiny little man. Lionel, we'll talk about this later. I have many forms and I am, did you just piss your pants? I know! I'm going to stand in the corner now. I have many forms and I master magic that you will never understand. No. But know this.

The money I pay you is real. So you still work for me. That's true. Okay, I'm good. All right. Just hang tight. I mean, sit. You can stay. Stay here. Okay. Mop yourself up or something. You're a good man. I'm sorry I do these things to you.

You're so tiny though. I'm strong of heart. You haven't been that strong, but anyways. I pull chod, chard, chard. Chard. Chard? Lionel. Lionel. I pull a lionel aside.

And I kind of grab him by the face a little and I say, we need you to be coherent and honest during this, and I cast enhanceability and give him Owl's wisdom. Okay. I'll take that. All right. I'm not going to fight back. It increases your wisdom. You get advantage on wisdom.

Yeah, but now I can't erase this fucking memory. Yeah! You just been going crazy with that modified memory. Hey, man. It's my bag of tricks, all right. So are we going to do this in an alleyway, or are we going to go get a drink and you tell us? and you tell us where the fuck you... It's an empty fucking bar.

Yes. Okay. Let's go back inside the tavern, but just know this. He doesn't drink, all right? Sure. Whatever. Come on. All right. We want to hear what you've been doing for a year. Come on. All right. Thank you for remembering.

You're my guy. You guys make great back into the tavern. Yes. You now have the delightful experience of role-playing two characters, Sam. No problem. That's got to suck. Welcome to Mike. I can kill Terry.

I have to go check on Doty. Mmm, look at the time. Goodbye. Oh, yes. Look, this is that guy we were telling you about for so long. The skeevy asshole that you always talk about. Well, the guy who dig the... Yes, the skeeby asshole.

That would be the one. Mm-hmm. It's pretty handsome. Scamling? You would say that. You would say that, wouldn't do. I think I'll go with you, Terry. Pike. It's fine.

Yeah, I'll go too. What? I want to listen. I mean, I'm curious. Talk to us, man. All right. Don't let them leave. You all can stay. It's been a while.

Yes. Yes. Yes, just stay. It's fine. Is it, though, Scanlan? Is it? done if I had just decided to open fire on you. I would have done what... I would have stopped you, darling.

I knew it was him right away. I would have done what Scanlan would always do. Would have stopped me after three rounds at the very least. I would have won and killed you. I mean, I'm super powerful and awesome. Yes. But really, this was not a good plan. Scanlan, there are some hurt feelings in this room.

And it might be time to address those. I know. I know. But for now, let's just catch up. What have you guys been up to for the last year? Oh no, no, no. After you, dear. After you. I'm chief of my people.

Oh, you did your Aramente. I did! Wow! I wish you were there. I mentioned you and everything in my speech. You did? Yeah. That sounds nice. Yeah.

Anybody else? Anybody else ascend to New Heights? No? Yes. Yes? Yes. Your turn? None of your business at the moment.

Tell us your business. Where have you been? I went traveling a bit. I did what gnomes do. I went into the forest with Kaylee. Oh, is that what gnomes do? They go into the forest? Forest.

I'm so sorry. Forest Gnomes do. And we talked and we sang songs and we just camped, not in the mansion, just in a tent. And we had some good times and bad times together, and eventually we found our way to Encarell. And some stuff happened, yada, yada, and I'm here now, you know? I mean... I try to pass my hand through Lionel's stomach to see if he's actually Kaylee. Is he? You feel like tons of abs.

And it bounces off and hits you in the face. Your own hand. I was with you on that one. Serious. Serious abs. It was good, those. Where's Kayling now? All the way up.

She's with me, eh? No, did we leave her back there? Kately's in Ankarel, when essentially you... She's, she is, it's complicated, but right now she is the meat man. Oh. She is back in Ankarel taking on the business while I'm off here. How are you two doing? Pretty good. We're a good team. Yeah.

Does she like you now? Like is a strong word. Really not. Love is a stronger. That's what people use like. Yes. Like is really already halfway there. That's that Al's wisdom, man, right there.

What just happened? You have advantage on wisdom. You have advantage on wisdom. Oh, I swear, it's new to me. It's new to me. I get to have like five Mongo-only pawnvarts. We're fine, she and I. We're a team, and she's taught me some stuff.

and I've taught her some stuff, and we operate together. And what kind of operation? Operate. We went to Enkarel to just get a little simple revenge, and it turned into something more than that. And I didn't mean to, but I guess I became one of the three largest crime bosses in Unkarel. In a year?

Eight months, really. We traveled around close to here. We were only 20 miles away for most of the first couple months. And then took us time to get there. But yeah, I've been, don't worry though, I'm not a bad guy. I just sell things, trinkets, furniture. Art pieces, antiquities, that sorts of thing. Nothing dangerous.

All fake. And to whom do you sell these things too? Rat bastards. People who deserve it, people with money to burn, and people who have done wrong in their lives. And I take some back. And why now? Why have you come back?

Not that I'm not overjoyed to see you, but I'm curious. I had information, and you had to know it. It's important. We found another one. Lionel did. The Ziggurat. Did you go inside? The orb, the whole thing. Another? You didn't tell me there's more. No, no, no. Well, I mean, there's the one you found, and then there's one here.

Yes. Will you tell them what you saw? Well, me and my buddies, we went inside this. Can I clarify? These are all hired men of mine. They're not his buddies. I paid them all. Could be both.

I mean, maybe they're friends now, but okay. Well, no, they're dead now. That's fair. I don't care. I guess if they weren't buddies, then I shouldn't feel bad anymore. The bad feelings will go away. We went inside the mountain, inside this mountain, following some people that, that,

do I call you Ace or? That's fine. Okay. Ace here told us to follow some people. I had learned of someone new coming into town and stealing some magical artifacts and leaving some dead bodies and it wasn't my organization, and it wasn't any of the other other.

the two leading crime organizations I found out through my whispers. So it was someone new, and I wanted to find out who it was. So I sent Lionel, the best man, and his buddies, to investigate. There's a comma there. Go on. Yeah, and he knew he could trust us because we're awesome. We were going to go get some information. So we followed them into this big tunnel that goes into the mountain. We had to go through a little. It took a long time and we had to fight like a lot of cool stuff along the way, but nothing important to this. I mean, all the details are good. When you tell a story, lots of details.

Lots of details? Yeah, yeah, it paints a picture. Well, I've never been good at stories. You're doing great. But when we got to the middle, we found a big giant pyramid. Wow. Or a Ziggy Star, what? Ziggy Star dress.

Is that what you called? Ziggarot. Wow. Pyramid's good. Pyramid. We're with you, yeah. We found a pyramid, and we saw all these guys hanging around it. And right at the top of the pyramid was this big, black ball.

Oh, fuck. It looked like a pearl, but it was giant. Wow. It was at the top of the pyramid, and these guys were wearing these really cool, like scary hoods and robes. And they were throwing stuff on the black orb. And it was like breaking and absorbing the stuff. And then this one guy.

What were they throwing in? Oh, it was anything. It was some of them through treasure, some of them threw some live, some like real animals. What? Live. And a person.

I was getting to that. I'm sorry, sorry. I don't want to catch you off. Keep going. Keep going. And then one of the guys actually jumped in and absorbed him. Did it look like that? You know that feeling when you hear one interesting thing,

and suddenly you want to know more? Well, that's the idea behind my podcast, something you should know. Every episode starts with a question you've probably never thought to ask, like why people do or don't like you, why certain habits stick, or what everyday advice is actually wrong. I'm Mike Carruthers, and I talk with scientists, authors and experts, and I keep it practical, surprising, and fun to listen to. If you've got a curious

brain, come try one episode of something you should know on the podcast app you're listening to right now. Look, there are a lot of celebrity interview podcasts out there, but there's only one happy, sad, confused. I'm Josh Horowitz, and yeah, I'm the host of the show, so I'm a little biased, but truly happy, sad, confused is the place for nerdy and intimate conversations with all your favorite actors and filmmakers. from Andrew Garfield and Scarlett Johansson to Christopher Nolan, casting what ifs, backstage stories, and much more. Listen to HappySag Confused on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Like he was in pain. No, it just was... And he was gone. And so, I mean, I had to get out of there. By then, my buddies... They were dead and take away. So I was the only lone survivor, and that's why he... can count on me the most because he knew I would survive.

Yeah. Is that why you sent them? Because you knew only I would survive? I assumed that yes. Okay. See, I'm the best. So that's what I saw. Was it how many, was it a lot of guys?

There was a whole bunch of these guys in robes. And dark hoods, executioner style. Matching robes? Yes, matching robes. And if I got a really creepy. feeling when I saw it. Roughly how many? Besides being in the middle of a mountain room.

Roughly how many? Oh, I don't know. I mean, it was dark. More than us? More than you. Two dozen? When you were there, it would have been about 12 or 13 of them there. It's a lot of matching robes.

It's a lot of matching rooms. And they all looked the same. Nobody looked a little more important than the others. I couldn't see their faces. They were all covered in these robes. How long ago was this? This was like a couple of months ago. I mean, you know, I lost track of time when we were on the shone.

a good time when we were on the ship. A couple weeks. Okay. Yeah. I was asleep for most of the ship ride. I was pretty sick. Yeah, I get sick too. I understand.

It was hard to tell. His face is always green, so we couldn't really tell. Right. You guys were good. You guys gave me all the leftover stew that you had. Yeah. Stu. What?

It's fine. Okay. Okay, so. So wait, and you saw Laura there? That's bullshit. Is that bullshit? No, it's all told bullshit. Okay.

Oh. No, I'm sorry. I lied to you. Red hair. Oh, you suddenly lied to us. Wow, I feel so shocked. I didn't know, listen, I wanted to tell you this information, but I didn't know how to do so.

I still don't know what's going to happen. You all might draw your knives and kill me right now. I just wanted to get this information. No, they won't kill you. I promise. Thank you. No, you tried to get me to give you my gun designs? Just some ammo.

For what? For my gun that I have. You have a gun? Yeah. He stole it from you. Remember? Of course. You gave it to him.

No, I didn't give it to him. What's your best case? Do you want it back? No, please don't do it back. No, it's mine. What's your best case scenario here? What did you hope would happen? You'd come and tell us these things and then what happens then?

You would go invest in this. With you? No. You would go investigate and I would go back to my job. So you're just here to be an errand boy. That's all you want to help us out. Yes. You traveled to a separate hemisphere to be a messenger.

It's only a couple weeks. Can I insert check him? Two? 23. Ooh. 37. Oh, he's back. Hard to read. I've thought about you all a lot during this year,

and I owe you all an apology for leaving you, and I don't know what I'll ever do to make it up to you. We deserved it? No, you didn't. No, we didn't. There was a night. There was a night early on, a few weeks after I left you. It was just me and Kaylee by a campfire, and she was asking me about myself and my life. And she has this thing. I don't know if it's a spell or a special ability, but she can always tell when I'm lying. She's the only one. And I was trying to spin some sort of bullshit to her about my past, and she called me on it and said, you know, the truth. Let me hear it. And I told her everything. I told her about all the lives I had ruined and about the women and about all the other Kayle's out there that I know of,

and the ones that I can only assume exist, and everything. And she spat at me, and she gave me this scar with her knife, and she left, and I thought that was it, I had ruined it. But before dawn, she came back, and she unrolled,

her bedding and she went to sleep and woke up the next morning and said, what's for breakfast, Dad? And I realized that I've been wrong that you don't you don't leave your shit behind and keep going. You take it with you and the ones you surround yourself with better get used to the smell. And she stayed with me despite all my flaws. And when I left you all, it was the first time that I had realized that you were all really flawed people, really flawed people. And I left, and I did not come back, and I was wrong, because family sticks around even if you kind of hate the other person. And I didn't. I betrayed you, and I've lived with that shame for you.

for a year. Well, I have a purpose. I have a job. People depend on me. Strong people like this guy. That's you. Me? Yeah. And smart people and Kaylee. And I'm a pretty big shot. Yeah, that's a big anymore. Well, I, it's a metaphor. Well, you always were. That doesn't sound too bad to me. Did you not feel like you had a purpose when you were with Voxmachina? I'm not judging you in the moment, in the moment. I knew I was part of something, but I always thought I was... I've been a storyteller, but I didn't think I was part of the story.

And for the last year I've been the story, and it's felt good. But I'm back, and I've given you the information, and you can tell me, what you'd like me to do next. You know, there is a point that we are all family, but we are also all friends. And there is that old saying of, be careful of the friends that drag you down. Maybe we were dragging you down.

I'm going to put some pistol shot in a small bag. What's Kaylee's mother's name? What is it? I toss it to him, dick, and I leave. For the record, Sybil. I think I actually hear something. Did you hear that? It sounds like small little violins that I hear.

Mm. Do you hear that? I don't hear anything. For God I had to talk to Percy about something. Bye. Good to see you. You know, you've broken a lot of heart skin, then. Mm-hmm.

I think you're still a heartbreaker. And I leave with them. I think they'll come around. I doubt it. No, I think she's right. I think more than anything they've just missed you, darling. Can I tell you a secret?

Mm-hmm. All this last year, I've known we would see you again. Darling said that you're never coming back. I knew. It's good to see you. It's good to see you all. I don't really know what to do now. I have, I really don't know what to do now.

And that's a new feeling for me. So I have information. We should travel back to Enkarelle so I can show you. Of course. And maybe then you all can decide what to do, whether to part ways as friends or enemies. But I can help you. I know people there.

I can get you safe passage. Fine accommodations, the best food. even some realistic looking antiques. Grog? I'll leave. You need to talk to them. Pike didn't get to say a word to you when you left. Grog was...

Should I go now or? I should give them some time. Maybe a little bit of breathing room and then. Yeah. Little steps. Lionel. Thanks for sitting through all this. I really appreciate it.

I was just telling stories in my head again. Oh, really? The good ones or the bad ones? The bad ones. They just pop in there. I'm sorry. I know you've had a bit of a rough life. Hey, maybe...

You want me to talk about my best? No, no, no, you don't have to. I mean, we're already weird right now, so I'm... Oh, what? Can we go to sleep now? Okay. So... It's 8 a.m.

Everyone's emotionally tired. Right. So we're going to see an oil. Yeah. He's back. It's a cup. It's midday at this point, so you guys all kind of go to your separate rooms and more like take time to yourselves independently

converse amongst individually. Pike, grog, do you want to drink? Yeah. Okay. I was just about to ask you the same thing. Oh, yeah. Drug, I want to go find that orb. What?

The orb and arc are we all talking over our headpieces? I think that's what we're doing. I'm sure Scanlan still has his. He can probably hear us knocking right now. Scanlan, can you hear me now. He's a dick. He can hear us. I know the range of these things. Yeah, I take off my opus too.

I kind of want to go. We're taking off our hair pieces? Yeah. Scanlan are not. That's why I like Lionel. He's funny. We all agreed on that at least. Are we supposed to be angry or sad or happy? I don't know what all these feelings are all at once.

You can have them all at once. Can I? Yes, they're not exclusive. Percy, where would someone like him stay and watch, dude? Where are you guys right now, by the way? We just went to, like, the closest pub. Is Lionel with them? Lyle's left behind with you unless he gave him instruction.

otherwise, he's your bodyguard. We're in the pub next door to the tattoo flower. Would you like to go with them or stay with me in my sad room? I'll go with them. Okay. I'm solely okay for that. You can sit down, do they have a bathroom there? They have an outhouse.

And right he's about to have this conversation. Lionel just moses up at the table. The barmaid's like, um... He learned a lot about his employer today. I have no problem with him being there. See, he needs a stiff drink. Can I get you some wine, ale? Beer, what would you like?

Fruit juice, maybe. Do you have chocolate milk? We do have hot cocoa. I'll see what I can do. Hot cocoa was doable. We've done hot cocoa before. Insecurity blankets. The orange blanket.

A wrap. Grog. Uh-huh. What do you think? Lionel. Mm. Real strong, are you? I'm really strong. Oh, yes. Hmm. I don't know a lot of things, but I think I know that.

Ace, does he depend on you? He does. Yeah. How long you known him? Probably about, well, I'm not really good with years, but, or days or months. But probably like a lot of days. Maybe a, maybe a year. Hmm. Hmm. How strong do you think you are? Well, the other day I tried to high-five. I'll reach across the table and just punch him in the face. All right, roll for an attack.

I love the malice radiating this way, and the absolute lack of recognition. It just stops here. It's also the camera line. So proud of you for. So what is your armor class? 18. 18. 18. So yeah.

Go ahead and roll. What was yours? Roll a . Oh, he's off the charts. Oh, yeah. For this year I'd say, yeah, D4, why not? Because here's a pretty beefy. D4, I'd your strength modifier.

Nine. Ow. Ten, sorry, ten. He comes across and just cold cocks you in the chin. You take 10 points of damage from a single punch. You feel a looseness to one of your back teeth, and the white hits you, and your vision clears for a second. You look over, and you see.

the beefy kind of gray-skinned Goliath, his fist still extended as he pulls it back, staring right at you. Whoa, that hurt. Yeah. How was? This bar, there's a lot more where that came from. Oh, you can eat, yeah. Yeah. Show me. That was awesome.

Rage. Oh no. Oh no. Total rage. Nino. We're not here. Yes, we are. Yeah, we are.

I asked. Are we at a bar at a table? We are on the bar at a table. They all left. We were behind. This is the problem when everybody's thoughts are in different heads. Do you all went to a bar together? Do you guys want to be in the same bar or not?

That's my question right now. We don't have to either. Okay, so you're not there. All right, so this is happening between you guys. All right, so Grog goes into a rage. Are we in a bar at a table? Yeah. You guys are in a tab right now.

There's a few people, and as soon as that punch happened, if people are like, oh, in the background, and as soon as you like stand up and go into a rage, people are getting to back out of the way, out of the way and tables were being pushed to the side. I'm going to go out to pay for this. I think it's awesome. I want to fight back, but not, it's play for me now.

So then I want you guys both to roll initiative. Grog, don't kill him. Grog don't kill him. What's my initiative? What is that? It's a sign? That's a nut. That's a 10?

Yep. 10. 14. All right, so as you get up, you're going to be great. You're like, all right. And it's like this guy, you're used to being the biggest guy in the room. He's a little bigger than you. Yeah.

I, Terry and Darrington, rolled a 14. You're not here. I'm with you, guys. No, he's actually, yeah, he... I thought you said I'm... Oh, Terry. I'm Terry and Dethergerton. Swift cups.

I stand up and I say, I've seen this before. He will attack brutally. Drink this. And I show a swift step draft in his mouth. Oh. Oh. You can run 80 feet now every turn. All righty, so you can move pretty fast if you want to.

And Keyleth is just watching intently and more importantly watching Grog making sure he doesn't actually beat him to death. No, we'll stop this before. We'll stop out if it's bad. I take a seat on a bar stool and just start drinking. Okay. Well. Yeah, we're sitting next to you. So as you're preparing, Grog, this guy who's looking,

a little larger than you are. And as soon as he stands up, he's quicker than you thought. Grogh, what do you do? Are we either table at a bar? You are, yeah. At a table or at the bar? Oh, you're at a table within the bar. Magnificent, I flip up the table on my hands and I'll just smash it over his head.

Okay, go ahead and roll for an attack. That's coming out of my coffee. 25. 25, okay. That hits. So go ahead and roll another D4. Some quick but not tackling. Oh, 12. 12 points of bludging damage to you as he smashes the table over your head.

Lionel, the wood just splinters and breaks around you to hear the crack of the broken wood, and you can feel the splinters kind of shred across edge of your shoulders, causing the kind of the burst of warmth and blood to begin to kind of flow to the top of your shoulders, and you're like, oh, this is exhilarating. Yeah, yeah. All right, that's your turn? All right, Lionel, you're up. Finally, you're up.

Okay. To fight. You can do anything you like. Whatever you want to. I definitely want to fight back, because this is fun. Cool. Here to help. It's a bonus action to rage if you want.

Yeah, but I like the, what? It's a bonus action to rage if you want to. Oh yeah, yeah, no, I saw his rage and I, no, I'm gonna rage because I want to mimic like, Hey, I can rage too. Why this? So do I run out? No, you're now raging.

You're now like your muscles swell, veins bulge out and with this big grin in his mouth. Like when Grog's raging, Grog's like angry rage, he's happy rage. So you can't either attack or these things. Oh, check it out. You see my vane, or d-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-. What do you want to do the turn?

You can punch him. Yeah, yeah. No, I want to go and do, so I run up to him and I go to do the really cool thing I heard in a cool story where I twist up my fist, and I go, whee. I've always wanted to try this, and this looks like a better time than ever. Go for it. So roll for an attack, and it's plus three.

You'll say plus 10. We'll say plus 10 for this, yeah. Okay, oh, yeah. 17. What's your AC? Plus anything? 17. All right, go ahead and roll a D4 and add your strength modifier, which I think is a plus five.

Oh, pyramids. And I'm looking for one. So D4 and add five. And then you add that five for your strength, so you got three plus your strength. Eight. So eight points of bludgeoning damage, you take four, Grog. Yeah.

First damage. Is that what, what? Plus three damage? Oh, plus three damage on top of that. Yeah. So, so five, so eight. So, so 11, sorry, you take five. Oh.

He takes half of bludging damage. But you did great. You got more tag, so you're both like taking lesser damage with each hit. Again? Yeah, you attack. You get two attacks, but you're raging, so you get a third attack.

No, Grog has an ability. He has a different, he is not a, he is not a frenzy bar, But he does get two attacks. He does get two attacks, so he can attack again. Okay. And this time, I run around him, because I'm super quick and I'm like using this new speed I've never experienced,

and I jump on his back from around, and I try to choke him. Grapples. Okay, so go ahead and roll an athletics check. That'll be rolling and that adds. Where's the athletic? That plus ten. That plus ten. Oh!

You go ahead and roll in athletics or acrobatics check to resist it. Oh, shit, this is huge. No, that's not great. That is 14. Oh, no. You leap up behind him, and you put your arm up under his jaws like concrete, but you still find the one soft part and jam your bulging forearm up into that space,

and you feel the windpipe close and clench in. And your really, really fast feet are now really fast dangling about two inches off the ground as you're up on his back right now. So that's the end of your turn. You're currently grappled grog. What are you going to do? And I'm just going to put it in reverse straight towards the wall.

Boop-bo-bo-bo-p-bo-p-bo-p-p-o-o-o-o. Okay, go ahead and roll. Do you want to, are you just going to stay hold on as you're doing it? Yeah, yeah. Okay. This is like the first piggyback he's ever had. Yeah. It's kind of fun for a second before you hit the wood.

Yeah. Wham! I will say go ahead and roll a strength-saving throw to see if you can maintain the hold after the slams. Okay. Okay. 18. 18.

Okay. I'd say that that's enough. That's enough. for the strength of the hold. So he keeps holding on after the slamming in the back. Anything else you're going to do with your turn? My action, I'll take my elbow raised up and drive it into his ribs. Okay, roll from attack.

Yep. That's a 28. Yeah, okay, so 1.4. No, you, that's just me to hit. I asked to roll damage. 10. So 10 damage, halved to five, and you have an ability as a reaction, if you remember.

Oh, yeah. Reaction, reaction. It's in your totem abilities. You can use his reaction. Right here. Oh, off a duck's back. Yep. Off a duck's back?

As you pull back and go to slam. The duck is my animal totem, you guys. I can explain that later. So as you go to slam them with your elbow, you hit, but you feel like your elbow slips off his body and doesn't quite do the damage you hope to do it. So you take two points of damage. Two points.

Sweet. Just covered in duck butter. The saxophone player from lost boys are covered. Creast up! Creast up! You said, you did it. Can I throw my head back in the headbutt. Go for it, Wolfram Attack.

Yeah, two and three. All right, so go to roll 1D4 plus string. 11. 11. So you take five points of bludgeoning damage, so you only do that reaction once per round. Does he have to... I took five points.

No, you have to use no. in action try and break free the ground. So you took five, yeah. So now it's back to your turn. He slammed you into the wall, he's elbowed you twice in the stomach. You've resisted some of it, and you're still holding him there. Okay. Okay.

So if you wanted to, because of one of the feats you have, you could turn that into a pin if you wanted to. One of the feats I have. You could like, it's on the bottom. Yeah, I want, yeah. Now this is starting to turn in wrestling match, I got like that. Yeah. Straight out.

Or you could just slam, or you just keep wailing on them. yelling on him. What do you want to take him out? No, right at the apple. Well, you're just having fun. He's not going to the apple. He's going down in the Whole Foods parking lot. Let's see. So I'm still hanging on him.

Yeah, you're holding under right now by the throat. He slammed you against the wall. He's elbowed you in the stomach twice. I want to, again, having fun, super speed. I'm going to, while holding onto him, I crawl up his back and jump over and try to land and try to do the move where I do that and throw him. Throw him. Oh yeah! Yeah.

Okay. All right, all right. Against one of the pillars in the bar, away from the innocent people. Okay, so. A pile of gold for these poor innkeepers. So make an athletics check. Okay. Athletics is 10.

And you have advantage on this because you're raging, so you roll twice. You can take the higher two. Oh, just the best. Yeah, roll again, best of two. Better. 12. So 22, right? Athletics.

Oh, yeah, so 22? 22. Okay, 22. Grog, I'm going to take it as your grapple. Go ahead and roll an athletic check with disadvantage. You got it. Just one roll because it's... Just one roll?

Because you're raging, you're also good advantage on it, technically. 24. You reach off, you leap over, and you grab them, and you go to pull, and it's like, ugh! It's like pulling a pillar! It's not budging! You can try again if you want to, or do something else. Oh, because he has a second.

Yeah. Second attack, yeah. Yeah. A ride. So I'm trying to think where if I'm, I try to jump over, so now I'm just kind of like, actually I did the flip, but I didn't pull him, so now I'm just hanging on in front of him. Yep.

I'm still holding on, but now I'm just like, I'm in front of him. Yeah. He's stooping you. Yeah. So. Human, too much stripper pole. So now. Oh my gosh.

Yeah. So now I reverse pile drag. Go for it. Don't think act. Yeah, well, I want to just like start. What would Cho do? Kind of like he's, you think this is play for him, so now I kind of, I don't know, this is not an attack, I just want to tickle him.

Okay. Like kind of grinding on him. But in a way, like trying to use that to his vantage to like make him uncomfortable. Make an intimidation check. Yes, Rollsie. That's intimidation. That's intimidation, okay.

You're good, you're good. Intimination. Plus nine. That's some Patrick sweet. Oh! 27. Whoa! Rogg's tickler!

Rog, make a wisdom saving throw. Yes! He's ruined. I mean it would spook me. I know. Four. You can imagine what I'm doing, well. So you guys get what I'm doing.

Oh, yeah. Oh. I'm going to save for the purposes. I'm gonna say for the purposes of this, it catches you so off guard and so unexpected that you're stunned for the next round. Oh! Because why not?

So as you do that, you see it kind of locks up and just puts you away. I can let go now. You can let go, yeah. It's kind of like, huh, huh, huh. You get a full another turn. What are you gonna? I'm gonna, can I run back and then do a skirt,

like, ah, and then I just dive in with the biggest punch I can. Go for us. You back away, you leave. Yeah, like everything I can put like all force, because I still want to get a good punch in there. Yeah, totally. So go roll for an attack. If you want it, you can make it reckless.

Actually, and he's got a thing called, oh, okay, that's no, never mind. It's a little bit more than. Yeah, reckless though. Yeah, reckless, yeah, no, he's definitely reckless. Yeah, so roll twice, take the higher on each attack. 15. Oh.

Oh. What is that? That's a 20. That's a 20. That's a 20. Oh, that crits. That's a critical plug. So go ahead and roll a D4.

A D4. Is that this one? That's the pyramid, yeah. Okay. He's also got, I might have brutal critical, so that adds 2D6 to that, but we'll get to that. Well, I technically would add a D4 because it's not using his sword. So yeah.

Got it. So roll that twice and then add your strength. Three, two, five plus ten, fifteen. But he's raging, so that's another three. So strength, strength. Five plus five. So it's 10. It's 10 plus three.

It's three. Plus three. Mm-hmm. So 16. 16 points of bludgeoned damage to you, Grog, it's eight. To eight. How you doing, Greg? Are you still okay?

Are you bloodied yet? He's down. That went to one and two hit points. All right. You'll happen? That's your first attack. So you run in, who, right?

Right as he looks up, kind of like, smiling as you come at him, you watch as like the beard kind of shakes in opposition. of the jaw quiver and you feel you can taste the iron welling up in the back of the tongue as you may have bitten off a small piece of the back of your tongue. As soon as you land from that punch, he looks a little stunned. You have a second attack if you want to. Yeah. I'm going to do my wave kick. Wave kick. Oh, that's not a, that's just, it's just something. He's always

wanted to try it. He doesn't know if I'll have the work. No, it's where he does a whole body like, and then his foot kicks him right in the groin. Awesome. You've practiced this alone. Many times this is your first chance to actually use it. So go ahead and make an attack for your wave kick. Right in the crotch. All right. Lionel with his nunchucks in the family den.

Basically. So just attack. Just attack, but it's reckless so you roll twice take the higher. Roll again. Better. 17. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.

Yeah, it hits you. So go ahead and roll D4 and add your damage. One, plus strength. Plus five is six. Oh, no. You only roll the D4. Oh, so one plus five plus three. Five plus three.

Okay, so nine. You take four points of bludging to damage, Grog, and you just took a swift wave kick to the groin as he kind of, whey! It's a little snap right to the nuts. So it's not like an immediate pain, it's the tap. It's the tail-y-like. The dull nausea pain, and he seems to shake a little bit

from the impact as he kind of grins and glars at you with his angry eyes. Well done. Grog? Grog, stop. No, don't kill him. I'm so confused. I've never had another male do that to my body. He shimmied on me, and then he punched me, and then he kicked me in the jollies. I turn around and I'll leave. He just walked away.

It's over? That was fun, you guys. That was fun. Hi, do you want to go deal with that? deal with that. Oh, who's just having fun? Is he all right? He'll be fine. I've never seen Grog walk away from a fight. He's not fine. What are you talking about?

I just didn't say he's fine. I said he will be fine. I'm pretty sure this makes you a member of Voxmachina now. No, let's not get ahead of ourselves. Well, that's what happened to me. They attacked me, and then when it was over I was in. Hmm? So there was chocolate milk. There was chocolate milk on the way. You see the moment in the pack is carrying this, this muckinna's like, this mug, and it's like, right.

He'll need a straw. Yeah. Here's your chocolate milk. Anybody else want to fight? No, thank you. No. I punched him across the face. Yeah!

You get the chocolate milk to your mouth before, boom. It just gets knocked right out of your hand. You're like standing on the table when this happens? I'm so excited. And you watch, as the fist comes across and the gnome that is in an arc of movement, lands on her feet.

You look down and you can see the white-haired, fully armored gnome there with her big gauntlets is now on there below you, kind of grinning and growling. That was good chocolate milk. We'll have another. Yeah, I was, I'm bummed about the chocolate. You guys have any more chocolate milk?

Yeah. Another round. Okay. She wanders off. That. Chocolate's expensive here. Another coin. That was all. was awesome. She can take it. I finished my ale and then flick a money on the bar and leave.

Oh shit, I don't have any money. He's gave it all the way. Terry. Terry. I'm covering. I'm covering. Thank you because I don't have mine. She goes, and the table? Sorry, there's a pile that's been growing on the table of gold for the furniture and then. All right, thank you. Brings you another round of chocolate milk. Yes. Is there a Are you gonna hit me before I drink this? No, I think that's done now. I'm not like, I'm not checking it's fine if you do. Just drink it first.

I think it's chocolate milk time. Mmm. Maybe I drink too much. I'm not sure this is really nice. I just want to say you guys, this is the most fun I've had a long time. Ace or you guys call them. Ace is fine, ace is fine.

he's all I've known for the past year and you know he took me in when you know things weren't going too well for me and it was and it's been great and you know he had a really cool speech about family I've never heard him talking about that it was kind of weird he's always been this really tough guy but I don't know if you guys realize that I just found out he lied to me for a year No, we know. It's why we took you to a bar. But you guys, he's lied to us too. Well, I know that he lied to you and I just found out that he lied to me.

But it's okay. Yeah. Because I realized that he was always there and even though I worked for him and he told me what to do and with bark orders, he always had my back and he was always the only one who took care of me. So I think you guys should like be nice to him or. That's the trouble is he does always have your back until he doesn't. The idiot has a point.

Well, let's not call names. Oh hey Terry. Yes. You're still here. Yes, I am. I get confused because of the cops. Terry and Derrington, please meet your acquaintance. Hi, I'm going to be leaving soon. Can I kick you in the nuts?

Please don't. I'm very dainty. Extremely dainty. You guys seem like you all enjoy that kind of stuff. It's awesome. You've met the couple that do. You're not wrong. You're not wrong. Only Scanlan can make Voxmakin is speechless.

It's happened a few times tonight. Do you notice that? Hadn't. I did. I'm really angry. What do we do? I want to go see that bloody orb. See that bloody orb.

Hey, Chode. Mm. Lionel. Sorry. I'm good about this normally. At least you guys are remembering one of my names. I have to come up with a couple. I used to have 10.

Oh, really? Just to make it easier for people to even call me in a name. Wow. I have quite a few names myself. Chard, where did you come from before you met Scanlan? Well, I lived in the desert. I woke up. I don't remember much when I was a baby.

I'm sure you guys all remember when you were babies, but... Usually not. Sure. No, carry on. I was... I was done. Nope, nobody does. It's fine. So far, so good.

Don't break, don't break him, please. But the only thing I knew were, I was orphaned. I never knew my parents because I woke up in a basket in a small creek. and the only thing that was there were ducks. Wait, wait. No, no, don't say wait. There, go on.

Just let them tell a story. Shut up, Tarian, shut up. And ever since then, ducks have been my spirit animal, and I feel like they bring me strength and make me smarter, and they give me scourge. So I grew up in the desert, and it was a rough time, but...

Were these desert ducks? How do you know there were ducks? Normally ducks don't know that were ducks. He's just been very interesting ducks. They were actually vultures. You're not there. Not bad. It's a vulture.

Said a voice that wasn't there. Carry on. They were ducks. Well, it was... Were you... It was a small pond in the middle of the desert. Some people called it on oasis or something. Noasis, yes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, you know, I never saw ducks again there, so I don't know, but I'm confident they were real. Mike Rattori, perhaps. The ducks blessed you. Yeah. and your birth and your survival. So, yeah, I just.

He doesn't know what a vulture is. I realized I was strong and I could do really, you know, awesome things with my body. So I did that, that kind of helped me when growing up and then, you know, finally I came to the city of Aque Rale. Acarell. That's a continent, but, oh wait, no,

No, Marquette is the continent. Yeah, that's stupid. Okay, yeah, yeah. That's fair. Yeah, I've heard that. Ever since I got to the city, I started using it, but people would abuse me in my body for its like abilities. So until one day I met, one day I met Ace.

He was kind and he brought me into his family. Family. Family. Yeah, a lot of talk of family tonight. He talked a lot of family to you. And ducks. And ducks. Did he talk much more about his family to you?

No, I didn't know he had a daughter. I mean, there was this really, like, killer babe in our group. Is that? Where is he? Where's A-Sah? Ace in here right now. It's not here right now. I'm not sure. Well, don't tell him, but I also had a thing for her,

but now that I know it's his daughter, ee. Tell me, yeah, no, we, that's not the first. That's good to know, so. But no, I didn't know much about, you know, he didn't tell me much, and I didn't ask a lot of questions. Nobody's ever asked me questions. You guys are great. Boy, that's not true. No. But that's good. You're a fascinating creature,

This is a good man. Let's, uh. We like you, we like you, Chode. Lion. Thank you. Lion, we like you, lion. I keep thinking Chaud. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, lion.

Come here, come here. No. No. Parchment and Boulder Shears. I'm gonna teach you. It's like rock paper scissors. Okay, ready, ready, ready? Ready?

I'm so disappointed right now. Ready? Ready? Ready? Okay, one, two, three. I punch her. Oh! Never mind, not disappointed.

Does this transpire now? I want to come over to you two having a drink. So you guys find a separate pub. I figured we just sat under the sun tree. Yeah, I got a flask. Yeah. So you guys sit under the sun tree. It's mid-afternoon, if now.

This is complicated. Yeah. Real complicated. Yeah. I was so happy to see him. Me too. Crog and Pike were not happy to see him. No.

We've got to find a way to get them talking again. Yeah, I think they will, but you're right. It will take some massaging. Yeah. Um, you know, I wasn't lying. I knew we would see him again. I know. I couldn't let him know that, though. Yeah.

This has been nice, it's always nice. I'm real happy. happy with my setup these days. With Kilith? That was the implication. Mm-hmm. But I miss you busting my balls on the regular. I know, right?

Yeah. Yeah. I miss it too. I think we were about to head back, but we gotta get this sorted out first. Yeah. What do you reckon's next? We're going to Marquette then.

Yeah, probably, Aunt Carell. You're all right. Yeah, I'm fine. You don't seem fine. Ah, no, I'm great. You know, it's interesting, Scanlan being back. Yeah. Makes me realize that, you know, he's not the only one who keeps secrets.

And you can't blame someone for keeping things to themselves, you know? So I'm not mad at him anymore for the things that he keeps to himself. to himself because everybody's got there something, you know? Are you getting it something? No, I'm just saying I understand where he's coming from and I am all right with it now. I'm fine with it. With the secrets.

I feel like I'm missing something. No, nothing at all. Well, I'm mad and I hope Pike and Grog can come around. I think they will. He's quite charming. I think everyone will come around. I hope so. I feel like... Sun Tree?

No. Paylaw? No. Raven Queen. Yeah. Pha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-wonder. I wonder if it's time. Time.

For what? Nothing, I'm drunk, never mind. Did you see this ring I picked up? Oh, did you buy that off a little caravan? Yeah, while you guys were fighting. talking about with him. That's great. It's very handsome, isn't you?

It's really nice. Yeah. I love you. Yeah. I'm glad we're all here. I'm glad we're all here. All of us. All of us.

Do you want to go find the rest? Yeah. Let's go find the rest. Okay. All right. Right his bags, walked him, boof, no, you guys,

you guys begin walking back to the pub that you've been hearing kind of the commotion in the distance, you see that's it, and you watch this grog, just kind of walks by in a huff. Grog? Big man. What?

Are you all right? Cat C.A.T. You're so smart. Do we see Pike come out after him? You're still in the tavern. I left after. You did. So then you watch Pike come out in a huff a little after him.

Pike? Hey. What happened in there? Well, nothing. Just hanging out. hanging out, just having a drink and, you know. But I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go take a nap, I'm very tired. Insight check.

Insight check. Well, you don't really need to roll an inside check to see this one's not doing so well. It was really low. I'm great. I'm alright. Just gonna sleep it off, I think. Too much to drink, probably.

Yeah, I'm feeling very drunk, so I'm gonna go to bed. Pickled pickle. I'm a pickled pickle. Yeah. But I'll see you guys tomorrow. Everything will be better in the morning. Sleep is the best medicine. Okay. You are a cleric.

All right. Pike wanders off. You guys make your way to the tavern with the commotion's there, and you walk in just as you see Kieleth And you knew when Lionel, in the process, is about to play an intense, came in Boulder, parchment shears, before Lionel just, whacked his Dex keel up across the face. Off my fist into like a rock elemental fist, like key to your fist, and I go, see you look, Boulder!

And I backhand Lionel. Okay, well, first off, you roll damage for her now. That's gonna be a D4, plus your... Too good. Oh, yeah. D4, you already hit. First I have to do. Just to D4.

You hit it. I'll tell you hit because she wasn't expecting it. He's a triangle. Okay. I know. Do you have to roll? Is he still raging? He's still raging at this point, I'd say.

It's just one. So it's one that's five plus three. I'm still raging. How long does that last? Actually, no, you'd have to be raging again because you did do your whole duck speech. So you could, six. Yeah. So you could rage and then attack.

You could rage and then attack. So I could rate, well, yeah, not rage. Yeah, okay. So one plus five. That was just a, yeah. So you take six damage. Wack. Now, Kieleth, go ahead, make an attack roll. With your Earth Elemental, I believe it's a plus what to hit?

Just with my fist? Yeah. You want me to use Earth Elemental? I mean, yeah. Yeah, to totes. Just the attack moment. She had said Altar Self. Right.

I had Alterself at two. 18. 18, which is around the class. You just hit. So roll, actually don't roll. Just add your strength modifier to one. So is your strength modifier? To just to one?

Yeah. Plus five, so six, six damage. So six damage, you take whack to the chin from the surface, like this rock. And do I take half that or no? If you started raging before that, then yes, you would. But you weren't raging it. But you can use your reaction to off a duck's back.

No, no, I don't want to. Okay. So you take the five damage right to the jaw, whacks, and now you got both sides of the jar ringing a little bit in pain. Best game of bowl. Or parchment cheers. Who else was, is it just a two-player game?

I am walking away with my chocolate milk and walking over to you guys. They're bonding. And as he's going, I sneak a bullet from him. You can try. You can certainly try. Go ahead and roll for that. Roll your sleight of hand. And Percival, I want you to go ahead. I want you to go ahead and roll a, this be a perception shake.

Do good, do good. Perception is 19. Alright, so go ahead and roll. Do it. Roll. So I have to get what? Well, you're rolling with sleight of hands, so out slight a hand or whatever you roll. 13 plus 11.

24. You just... Pock it all over. Oh, shit! He beat my passing perception too. Yeah, nobody sees it. Nobody sees it. Well done.

Hey, guys. Does anyone have any shears? Yes and no. Shears! I have them, you can't have them. So if Percival walks past and approaches them. They're bonding. He's a bit adorable. Seems nice.

He's likable. I am angry, frustrated, and violent, and so I'm going to try something new and drink chocolate milk. And listen to you and do whatever it is you think is best at this point. I don't know what to do here. He's learning. What do we do? What do we do? What do I do? I don't know what to do either, dear.

I think it's a matter of forgive. Well, I'm not there yet, but I know I'm feeling emotional, and I know that when I need to shut up and listen to you, so. Well, it's going to take time, I think. Yes. I'm surprisingly okay with it. I'm just happy he's back. I'm less not okay than I thought I'd be.

I'm worried about grog. I'm very worried about him and Pike. I'm very worried about Pike. I don't know what to do. Are they fist fighting in the background? And I go, hey guys, hey guys. Shears! And I grab onto his plate armor,

and I cast heat metal. Your armor suddenly begins to turn bright orange and burn your skin. Oh, oh, okay, okay, that hurts. That hurts. Yeah, how much damage to that deal more, sure? Oh yeah, how much damage to that deal more sure? Mm-hmm.

2D.A. damage. All right. That's gonna hurt. And you get to roll that one. Oh, I do. Elemental damage. There you go. Oh, yeah.

10 damage. Fuck him up, babe. Just sears and you're like, oh, it burns. That's new. That's new, that's new, babe. And so I try to do a little bit of the roll-off, right? Yeah. So then you go ahead and you take five damage.

and you take five damage. So you kind of shrink into your armor, so you try and minimize your torso. Yeah, you're like, ooh! Turtling. All right, one second. I'm going to just gently walk up behind them while this is happening, and I'm going to Vulcan neck pinch him

with the diplomacy. Oh my god. Okay, go ahead and roll for an attack. So that's a, where is that? There is that. Wait, you have an issue? Oh, is this going to take a saving throw? a saving throw? Yeah. Yeah. Okay, sorry, because I had...

21 to hit. That hits. I have the danger sense. Is that... Yeah, so what's the save on that? It just says advantage on dexterity saving throws. On dexterity. Dexterity saving throws. Is that a dexterity? Well, what's the same of plummet fee? It's a... I have to pull out because I didn't pull this together as much as I thought I should have. It's a... Constitution saving throw. All right, so go ahead and roll Constitution saving throw. And, that's fine. Which is a D20. I'm gonna roll the damage really quickly.

Okay. Oh wow, this is a lot of damage, I apologize. All right, 17 points of lightning damage. So you take 17 points of lightning damage. Oh, we didn't save? No, Constitution saving throw now. Correct. 20.

Okay. 20. Yeah, he saved. That's a natural 20 on the table. Oh, well, that didn't work. So you feel like burst of electrical energy. That was supposed to knock you out. and now it didn't.

That tickled. I'm going to go to bed you guys. That was fun. Anybody else wants to? No, okay. I'm going. Hey, Lionel just leaves. See, never works properly.

I really got to work on that. That was a weak hit, by the way, if you were trying to hit me. I hit it. See ya. Wait, wait, wait, hold on. You're going to drink this chocolate milk. You can take it. You've earned it.

Is I used the bar with the glass? with the glass. Another gold coin goes on the table. Would you stop it? No. All right, so the four of you now sit there in the bar. Fash just replayed the best game. Terry is there.

What's that? Terry's there, that's right. It would be good for the brigade. I kind of like him. Yeah, yeah. He's a sort of positive energy I think your family's going to need around. Absolutely. I like him a lot.

You sure you can't stay? I'm staying for a little while. I have to find Doty. I understand. I have to find Doty and get some stuff, and then I've got to be on my way. By the way, what you said back there with your family about me? Yes? That was very flattering. Well, I know you're taken, and you know. It doesn't mean I can't be flattered. I'm quite flattered. That was very flattering.

Well, I meant it. And, you know, if things were different, you know, I would feel the same way. If things were very different. I get it. I get it. You're sort of making it worse. You're quite a catch. You're quite a catch. And we're not flirting with each other. Thought it might be fun.

I'm going to gather up my things and prop up the table again and leave. How much gold would be appropriate for the damage and dead some? The table isn't that expensive, to be honest. Between the drinks you guys had, A solid seven, eight gold will handle any other? I'm not going to leave 10 gold. Okay.

I'm so sorry, but try never not to make it worth your while and not be too horrible. It's nice to know that they, Derole those are as lively as the rest of the people who live here. Thank you for running this establishment. Have a good day. You too, my lord, my lady.

Let's go find the kids and. See if we can make them feel better. You know, I think they're going to bed, but we can try. Keel throws her arm around facts and catches them up the whole way we walk. I really think you would really like Chode. He's super nice, and he likes drinking chocolate milk. I do. I like him already. He's instantly likable. I really, like we got to talk a lot and he talked about his background.

Ducks. Dux. I was trying to... Oh my gosh. I was trying to... Where were you? I don't pitch him to Terry, but I really like him. No, this is all good.

I love how you all fall in love with Chod over here. It took you guys like a full two weeks to even stomach me for a day, but that's all that's fine. We're not asking him to join while we were thinking about having you join. No, he's great though. Instant love with him. He's not box market a material though. Are you too serious?

Yeah. Okay. Hey, you know, I feel like we were about to make our exit, but it's a little more complicated now, right? I might need to stay on a day or two. We're doing this thing. Yeah, now let me... Oh, we're definitely doing this.

We're going to Oncarel. I think we got a... The Sigurals is kind of a big deal, right? Yes. I feel like that's warranted for extra Ashari leave time for diplomatic duty, right? I can... I said duty. I did say duty.

I know. I know you would know. Never change. I'll let Dad know. No, he's gonna have to watch the tribe for a few more weeks. I'll let Karsnow. But one of these days I will have to be getting back very soon. Let's talk to Pike, let's talk to Grog.

Let's see how they feel. Pike? Crog. Did you put your earrings back on? You hear nothing. Scanlan? Yes. I think they're really depressed, yeah.

I think they're angry and sad. What? Percy? What? What? Oh, this is like a one-channel frequency we can all hear. Oh, it's just a party line. Yeah, definitely, yeah. I'm just letting you know their earrings are off. They can't hear us.

Well, they're not talking. What do you, what should I do? Say you're sorry. But they can't hear me. We'll go fucking find them. Something like this is better done in person as opposed to over a... communication device?

I shouldn't text my apology? Nope. You should not. Boy, there's a life lesson. Don't talk to your apology. Don't use the message spell, drop heavy shit. Eye contact, motherfuckers. I contact. Right then, I walk into wherever he is, right? Right, you go back back to the towers.

Yeah. And I walk in, hey. Oh, hi. Boss. Hey, I got you the bullet. You did? Yeah. I did give him a bag of a match. I could have heard of that.

Okay. Okay. So anyways, I'm gonna go to bed now. Sure, sure. It's nighttime, right? Yeah, no, it is, but did I buy him a room, or is he just sort of? No, you don't have to buy him.

You bought out the inn? Oh, good, yes. For a... I'll just go sleep in the corner either way. Okay. Yeah, if anyone tries to kill me, I don't know, I want to kill them. Oh, yeah, I got it. I have danger sense.

Oh, you do? Ducks sense? Yeah. And the ducks will tell me if there's anything wrong. The ducks. Yes, I know this about you. Commune with ducks. It does actually have commune with ducks.

It is on the page. You know what? You know what? I'm going to use it right now. Do we have ducks in euros? There are ducks in white shows. There are ducks in white shows. There's a lot more ducks in this area than they're on in Marquette.

There are ducks. We have ponds in the local park. There's a small pond in the cemetery. I forget I can do that wherever I go and I never get the chance. What are you going to ask them? They can tell me up to three facts about the land. Yes. What do the ducks of Whitestone say? What do the ducks say? As you take a moment and you kneel and you close your eyes and you envision the connection you had as a child to the ducks along the pond of the oasis. And as you open your eyes again,

you see there waddling in through the doorway of the inn as the sun in the afternoon is going down to dusk. Oh, there they are. You see this one duck crack. My God. Hey, Brownie. What do you have to say about this place? What do you want to ask it?

Oh, I have to ask. Do we? All I hear is quacking, right? He's just cracking in. Yeah, you're just hearing, cracking back in before. Quack, quack, quack, quack. Do, do we get bad weather here? Do you get bad storms here?

You hear through the ducks quacks. It rains quite often, actually. It's pretty cloudy. Great. Okay, so don't leave the hut without an umbrella. Okay. Okay. Thank you. And then,

Do we have to worry about, are there any pyramids? Have you seen any pyramids around that place? The duck's head turns out of the way and says, Guthu Quacks, actually, there's one below the city. Do the ducks know that? They wander everywhere. How do they get down there? Do you know that already?

The same reason why pigeons are in Costco, okay? Okay. They're everywhere. He said there's another pyramid under the city. The duck knew that. Yeah. That is crazy. Should we go, okay, well.

No, no, no. Okay. Well, is there anything you need to know, Master? Yes. About this area. It's pretty limited. Have Fox Mocken have been happy. Ducks, do you know if that group over there,

have they been happy? Okay, have they been happy? They didn't look happy when they left the tavern. I think we all knew that you kind of wasted that last one. I didn't have any. Okay, it's okay. We did it. See, Brownie.

It was awesome. Can we go to another city sometimes soon so I can do that again? Yes, we'll definitely do that. Absolutely. Oh my God. Yeah. You need to use that skill more often. You know what's the problem is we don't have as many ducks in Uncle Elle.

on Karel. I know. And most of the time I just find out if it's gonna rain or not. It's not that useful. You've been great this whole trip. Thank you. I'll tell you what. I'm gonna buy some ducks and just keep them, keep them back in on Karel for you. They can be your little birds. And I go to hug him, but then I forget that he's... Is he still enchanted? No, I'm a little bit. No, I'm a little guy, yeah. So I'm like, I squeeze him hard. A little too, oh. Because I... Okay, I'm gonna go sleep in the corner. I should go sleep in the corner. Please do.

Sleeps in the corner. All right. Scanlan, do you do anything? I mean, I was told to come apologize and find them, so I was told. I'll go seek my friends out there in the world. All right, where do you go? Where am I going? Hello, it's me Scanlan Shorthalt. Where do you want to go?

I don't know where is everybody. Well, Pike and Grog. And Grog went back to their rooms. I don't want to disturb them. They're by themselves alone. Should I go knock on their doors? It's up to you. Okay.

I'll go find, do I know where they're staying? You do. You've been to Wyestone Castle. You know the rooms are in the castle. It's just been a while. I'll go knock on Grog's door. Do you need me for anything? No, you sleep it off.

Are you sure? Yeah, you've had too much chocolate milk. Yeah, I'm feeling a little bloated down there. Make rid of the castle you're leaden, because the guards still recognize you as a member of Fox Mockument. Which room do you go to first? Grog. Grog. Are you in your room?

Mm? Boy? It's me. Scanman. Can I come in? I dimensioned door into the room. It's going to... ...appears in the center of your chambers. You okay? You didn't come to the door? Big fella.

I leave. I'll let him go. Take a shit on his bed now. Grog leaves the chamber and exits. I'll walk over to Pikes room then. Okay, Puck you in your room? Hello. It's me, Scanman. What do you want? Just to talk and say hello.

Oh, but we already said hello. Just to apologize again. I'll open the door. Yes? Hey listen, I know that we haven't seen each other in a while, and we left on weird terms, everything that's happened between us. But I want you to know that I held no ill will towards you. I thank you for agreeing to my request a while ago to look after Kaylee. Kaylee, if I should fall.

And I'm glad it didn't come to that, but it's an honor to know that you would have even considered it. Um, slap him across the face. Sure, sure. Do you know, do you remember what you said before you left? I mean, obviously you said lots of things. But there was one thing in particular that's Always bothered me.

What? You said that you were kept alive by some weird fucking magic. And that's what I do. And I brought you back so you could be with your daughter. So fuck you. Well, that was a cheap shot. Sure, and you know what? I apologize for putting you in my clothes,

but just the scandin that we know, would have thought that was funny. I'm sorry I didn't know your mother, but I imagine you don't know my mother's name. I don't. Pike, I don't have anything to say in my defense. I was wrong about the whole thing. I was not a good friend and I was not a good teammate.

And I'll have to live with that. But I can tell you this. I like who I am now, and I didn't then. So maybe someday we'll meet and you'll get to know the new guy. But if it's not meant to happen right now, that's okay, and I understand. And I will just go back to what I was doing before. So you like who you are better without us? No. No, that's not what I meant.

I meant I like who I am now that I know my daughter, and I know that no matter what, I have someone out there who's rooting for me. No matter what happens, I've got that. I, yeah, that's it. I don't like what I, what I've been doing the last year in terms of, you know, I've been breaking the law a bit, which I know you don't love.

I don't care what you do. But I'm doing things that I want to do for me and my girl, and it's been rewarding, and it's been fun, and that's all that matters at this point. I'm comfortable with the bastard that I've been, because I know that... Welcome to Mick Unplugged, the number one podcast, for self-improvement and modern leadership.

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Oh, please, not that music. That music gives me nightmares from my childhood. Could we get something a little bit lighter? Some lighter music here. Are you a fan of true crime TV shows? And what about Unsolved Mysteries? The show that jumped started all of our love of true crime. I'm Ellen Marsh.

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The man I am now is different. So I can't make everybody happy anymore. and I think that was my problem before. I was trying to make everyone happy, and that's not my goal anymore. I'm sorry if I hurt you. I'm sorry how I treated you when we first met, how I ogled you and flirted with you relentlessly.

That was disrespectful. But what I'm most sorry for is that you met me then and not now, and that's all I can say. Perhaps we'll, you know, meet again on different circumstances. Okay. Okay. Good night.

I'll leave. Okay. And I'll just phone Vex real quick and say, Hey, didn't work. I'm gonna go back to Oncorel now. No, no. Yeah, it's not work, it's not great. Scanlan, it takes time.

Things take time. I'm sure it does. Scanan, where are you? I'm outside Pike's room, weirdly. Stay there. I mean, I think she can hear me talking through the door. I don't think she's wearing the airing. No, no, no, I'm really, I'm outside her door talking.

I'm sure she can hear them through the door. Like right there? Yeah. Hi, can you hear me? Just, I can hear you. Yeah, she can totally hear everything. You can all, this is an open channel. We can all hear.

Hi, Scanlan. Oh, hi. Hi. Hi, Kila. Maybe you should just sleep on it before leaving town. Well, no, we're coming with you. You're not just leaving us. Again. Again. You just got here. And some of us are happy to see you.

We're gonna go see the pyramid. Yeah, you can go to Encorel, but we'll be right behind you, I guess. That's... yeah. We know who you are now. Ace... Agis. Terri, you in for one more adventure before heading home? And that would be... That would be a sweet clothes to it. I met you in Encorel, didn't I? Yes. I'm down.

To Encorel in the morning then, because I'm trying to sleep, you motherfuckers. Take your earring off. You have to put it on silent if you ever want to fall asleep. The clasp is like rusted from when we were in the water plates, so I can't take it off. Okay, okay, shut up. I'm just stuck there. All right. You all eventually find yourselves to rest for the evening.

Scaling, you make your way back? I'm gonna leave the little rock thing that Grog gave me right outside his door. And I'll get Lionel up at first light, and I guess we'll make a, we'll set out for on Corral. Oh, we'll see him there. That's a two-week journey for you. I got no other way to get there.

You could come with us. It's as good. When we get there, you could use the bloody stone, and then instantly join us. You told you to go. Didn't you just say, I will see you there? Somebody just said we'll see you there. I said if you run away, we'll still find you.

We'll still be right behind you. We're not telling you to find you. We'll be right behind you. Wait, so you want to travel with me? Yes. Oh, okay, well then I'll stick around. All over the airing. You know, I missed this drama.

I missed. This is great. So we'll say, the next morning light, as you all come to consciousness, find there spry and waiting in the center of town, one Scanlan Short-Halt, in one Lionel Gayhart, ready to join you on a trip back to Encaro. And that's what we'll pick up next one. Hey. Is this something you wanted to do? Is this way to put it on?

Do it, do it. Do it. Do it now. As you guys are gathering in the center of the city on your way to the Sun Tree, they stand there in the light. You guys have your equipment on you. You're prepared for whatever may come on the other side of the world in the deserts of Marquette, wherever this mountain may be. Oh, you're still here. You need me to find this thing, so I'll lead you to it. I throw them a bag of cookies. So we opened a bakery while you were gone. We have these. They're called Shorties. They're after you. So hopefully you like them. Much like you. A bit It's a bit disappointing.

Yeah. I'll try, well, does it have any... Cookies. Oh! Oh! And that's all the episode of this week. Oh, fucking fun, man. That was so fun.

You were so fun. You were so fun. Yay, chew. Dude. Chod. She's still cannula. By the way, I forgot earlier to mention that a pseudo-something pseudo something won the thing in this.

Oh, yay. Congratulations to you. Donova, we'll contact you if they haven't already get your information. What was under the blanket the whole time? Mike, we'll have to wait next week. Next week is what's under the blanket. That or cake?

Possibly. Oh my gosh. Actually, I was about to say, because he's not seen a proper battle map, so maybe once we're gone. I'll show him once you guys leave. But yeah. Dude, thank you so much for coming and playing with us,

seriously. That was so much fun. It was amazing. Lionelon. Yeah. Yeah, you can prepare for so much duck art. It's just gonna be, it's gonna be like a 50's study. It's just when it's so nice.

Ducks everywhere. I love it. Oh my God, next week's our 100th episode. Next week is our 100 episodes. How fucking weird is it that we got the t-shirts released? Oh, dude. The minute that you showed that the t-shirts have shown up, I've shown up they were going on the show tonight.

I'm meeting Zamer like, like, if people didn't think we had a writer's room before, they definitely are now. This feels like a marketing campaign. I didn't know about the shirts until we show up. That's just been in process. Yeah, we've just been working on this show for a while, and it came out.

We didn't plan that in any way. It's kind of amazing. Sirendipitous. It's kind of amazing. But anyway, guys. We're gonna go on to us have flights in the morning. You go to the stream of annihilation tomorrow and Saturday at D&D. Bigger applause for John Heer.

Yeah. Yeah. That's good. That's sweet. Have wonderful night, guys. Rest well and is it Thursday, yeah. Good night. You keep that, by the way, just in case.

he wants.