Critical Role - C2E110 Dinner with the Devil

Episode Date: September 24, 2020

The Mighty Nein attend a dinner hosted by a monstrous figure from Caleb's past, where both revelations and questions arise in multitude...Watch Critical Role live Thursdays at 7pm PT on https://www.tw...itch.tv/criticalrole

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello, spellcasters, sages, and spectators. I'm Ashley Johnson, and you're listening to the Critical Role Podcast Network. Tap into our magical narrative by watching Critical Role as it airs on Thursdays at 7 p.m. Pacific on twitch.tv slash criticalrole or youtube.com slash criticalrole. Twitch subscribers can watch the video on demand right away, or you can catch it the following Monday on YouTube. As always, Critical Role will be available right here in podcast form on Thursdays, a week after the initial broadcast. And now, let's scry into the story and see what mysteries it holds for us, shall we?
Starting point is 00:00:43 Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons. for us, shall we? First is the wonderful NordVPN. So let's turn it over to our resident hackers, Sam and Laura. Okay. Okay, Kryptonic Override, now that Taliesin freed us from the internet, and with NordVPN encrypting our traffic and hiding our IP and physical location, we can unlock the secret of the evil Ultra Codex. This will be a walk in the park, BlackWillow69. Time to j- Ja-
Starting point is 00:01:24 Ja- Jack in? to ja, ja. Jack in? Jack in, yes, to the main, main something. Frame. Frame! Positronic, obviously. Time to jack into the main frame. Okay, here we go. Oh, a firewall!
Starting point is 00:01:41 Oh dang, I have no idea what to do. I'm stuck. Uh-oh, Black Willow, I got a cube over here. Oh, yeah! Guess I'm going to have to beam it. I don't know, do you beam a cube? I don't know. Oh, no, no. I think you dream it or meme it. I can't remember.
Starting point is 00:01:59 Oh, no, no, no, no! It's asking for a password! Password, no problem. Wait, actually, we should probably respect their privacy and just stop right there. Whoa. Oh, my GameCube. You've lost your powers.
Starting point is 00:02:11 Wait, what? When you were in the web, the serial killer must have drained your hacks or abilities. Your minds have been sliced. But we're the most sophisticated key punchers the Darknet has ever booted. There isn't a digital Kenan that we can't tell. There's no doubt that you are the greatest crypto kings
Starting point is 00:02:33 to ever key log a target. But without your hacking skills, you'll never beat the Ultra Codex. What do we do, Fraser Byrne? There is a way, but it's dangerous. I could download my entire 1.21 gigaflops of brain archives into your flash dance protocol. Wait a second, a data transfer?
Starting point is 00:02:52 But you'd be giving up your master level computer powers forever. It's the only way. One last hack for justice. Hacksaws, Click together. Click together. Okay. Oh no! We're only gonna have one shot at this. You okay over there?
Starting point is 00:03:18 I'll be fine. Power glove, silver cranked, transfer modules, hot and bothered, master and commander, the far side of the world. Far side of the world! Farewell, hacker planet, who was elite while it lasted.
Starting point is 00:03:36 Activating self-slice! Yeah! Did it work? Oh, God! Did it work? 01011001. That's binary for yes. Yeah. I know binary.
Starting point is 00:03:56 Razor burn. Are you okay? Oh, who? Oh, geez. There's some pretty doohickeys you got there. Are those calculators on your arm or something? Oh, geez. Those are some pretty doohickeys you got there. Are those calculators on your arm or something? Holy shift. He's gone. The freezer burn sacrifice will not be in vain.
Starting point is 00:04:14 No. Because we're going to hack the Ultra Codex. Yeah, and with NordVPN 68% off sale going on, it'll only cost us $3.71 a month plus. We get an additional month free when we sign up at nordvpn.com slash critical role and use coupon code critical role. NordVPN's secure and unlimited service
Starting point is 00:04:33 will literally save the world. Yeah. Matt. Matt. Hack to you. Tune in next time Oh. Tune in next time for another technotastic episode of The Nord and the Stone. Wow.
Starting point is 00:04:54 If NordVPN never sponsors us again. That was a dramatic one, huh, Vita? That was very dramatic. Wow, yeah, that took some turns. The prop work was great. Thank you. Well great. Thank you. Well done. Thank you, Maxwell.
Starting point is 00:05:07 Thank you, Sam and Laura and Taliesin and NordVPN for your patience. Did you just shake it to turn it off? That was incredible. Oh my god. That's why I turn off all my electronics. That's why I turn off my PS4. My little packs of gear on the table for us again,
Starting point is 00:05:25 because it's awesome. It's pretty cool. That looks like a lot of fun. That one's a start. That's very fun. All righty, and our second sponsor for tonight, the returning sponsor friends from the beginning of campaign to up until now, D&D Beyond. D&D Beyond! If you are new to D&D or just can't get enough
Starting point is 00:05:42 of your own games and you want to check out the legendary epic bundles and unlock all, or epic legendary bundles, I should say, and unlock all 38 current 5e D&D books for your table, you can do that now at D&D Beyond. You can access all the monsters, magical items, spells, and more for use on the digital tools on their site. And you can get 15% off all future source books and adventures on D&D Beyond as well. Plus, anything you previously purchased on D&D Beyond is credited towards your anything you previously purchased on D&D Beyond is credited towards your bundle purchase. So check out the Legendary Bundle
Starting point is 00:06:08 at dndbeyond.link slash crlb for Critical Role Legendary Bundle. Thank you, D&D Beyond. And that's it for our sponsors for tonight. As far as announcements go, Marisha, you got something to talk about. Uh, yeah. In case you missed it,
Starting point is 00:06:25 first episode back of Talks Machina. Yeah. Did it air already? It's back. It did, it aired and it is now on YouTube. It was so good. It was great. Ryan was so great. I know. Yeah, featuring Laura and Matt. We had a good talk. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:43 It was amazing. And since it now airs every other week, next episode will air on Twitch next Tuesday, September 29th, 7 p.m., of course. Yeah, of course. And as always, the VOD will be available on YouTube on Thursday and the CritRole Podcast Network
Starting point is 00:07:02 the following Tuesday. But it's back. Look at that shit. Awesome. Thank you. Talking about the D&Ds. Hell yeah. And beyond. Mm-hmm. Nicely played. All right, thank you, Marisha. Double plug.
Starting point is 00:07:13 And Laura, you got an announcement you want to make real fast. Yes. It's a little one, but it's a good one. Log comp. All of our Mighty Nein chibi pens designed by the wonderful Jenny Park are now available in our Australia store. Hey!
Starting point is 00:07:29 Ta-da! Check them out at shop.critroll.com.au. Fantastic. That's it, that's all I got. Awesome. Thank you, Laura. All righty, I believe with the end of our announcements, that brings us into tonight's episode of Critical Role. Yeah! The adventure begins, they were always beside you
Starting point is 00:08:21 Your nerdy best friends and the DM to guide you and they rise from the flames for the battles ahead villains beware cause you're about to be dead they got magic and flair they got falchions and cunning they don't see over there There's a monster incoming Inspiration is waiting Rise up, don't think twice Put your fate in your hands Take a chance, roll the dice Roll the dice
Starting point is 00:08:56 Roll the dice Roll the dice Roll the dice Can you answer the call? Digging deep in your soul As the legend unfolds And welcome back. SAM and LAURA And welcome back. So last we left off, the Mighty Nein, after returning from Traveler Con and their adventures at Rumblecusp,
Starting point is 00:09:36 made their way to Nicodranas to catch up a bit with Marien Lavorre. Yeah! To do some shopping, to set off some research into some aspects of the mysteries that surround some of their recent adventures. And we, I guess, introduced, not even introduced, returned Nott to spend some time with her family,
Starting point is 00:09:57 Veth, with her family. During that period of time, you all decided to make your way to Rexxentrum to speak with Lady Vess Darugna, one of the members of the Cerberus Assembly, who had previously said that they were interested in some transactions or a business opportunity for you after seeing what you had achieved
Starting point is 00:10:21 in the name of the negotiation that ended the current war between Xhorhas and the Dwendalian Empire. After doing a little bit of shopping around Rexxentrum and gathering some extremely powerful magical artifacts, you made your way to Darugna's tower. Had a conversation that outlined the future interest she had to the north in a location known as Eiselcross. She lets you know about an element of a shadow war
Starting point is 00:10:55 that had been long brewing in that direction and what seemed to be a race to power between many factions, namely the Empire and the Dynasty, in search of these ruins that have begun to be uncovered in recent times beneath the ice. Broken bits of the ancient arcane city of Aeor seem to have been slowly recovered from beneath that region. And she would wish you to accompany her there
Starting point is 00:11:25 in search of more information and answers as to what it's capable of, what can be found, and preventing others that she feels should not have such power within their midst. So you accepted this and were given about a week or so to return when you finish your preparations to begin your journey to this odd, much colder region of Wildemount.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Upon exiting the tower in Rexxentrum, not too terribly long after your arrival, a message was delivered to the group, a letter that was addressed to Bren. And upon reading the letter, it seems that your presence was also noted by Master Trent Ikithon, who then requested the presence of you, Caleb, and your companions the evening of the next day
Starting point is 00:12:16 to join in his tower, along with your two previous classmates, Astrid and Eadwulf. That was where we had left off. So as you all stand around Caleb in the midday cloudy air on the not terribly bustling streets of the Candles region of Rexxentrum, as Caleb finishes reading this letter out loud to the rest of you,
Starting point is 00:12:44 what do you do? Are you going to go? Yeah. Yeah, it's what we came back for. There's a lot I don't understand. Still. And... And...
Starting point is 00:13:18 My old teacher... Is... My old teacher is... Adish? Yeah, but I don't know how redeemable or not, my friends are. I don't have a lot of faith that they are, but... I need to know. For sure. And then also, I have many questions about the Assembly. It is hard to know if they have...
Starting point is 00:14:08 if their plans line up with the King's, or if they have their own plans, if they have the same plan within the Assembly. They don't all seem to get along. You don't think it's a trap, do you? I think it very well could be a trap. What do you think he wants from this meeting, from you? It's a very good question,
Starting point is 00:14:42 and I'm not sure I can give you a definitive answer. But, uh... Trent took his work very personally. My best guess is... I am somewhat of a failed experiment. Hmm. I don't know. I don't know why I was left abandoned for so long. I'm curious.
Starting point is 00:15:18 What if you aren't a failed experiment? You think there's another shoe going to drop? Maybe. Like they let him go on purpose? We've certainly achieved more than he had previously. Perhaps he's just in favor now? I've considered it. Just trying to think of all the angles. Just in favor now? I've considered it.
Starting point is 00:15:50 Just trying to think of all the angles. Regardless. I think it's irregardless. Irregardless? Unregardless. Unregardless, that's what it is. Zemnina's very precise. They did just update that in the Cobalt Reserve dictionary.
Starting point is 00:16:04 No, irregardless. They did fucking update it in the Cobalt Reserve dictionary. No, no. They did fucking update it, actually. No. Which is just maddening. It's decay of the Empire. Death by a thousand cuts. It could be a trap, though, and I need to impress upon you,
Starting point is 00:16:23 Ikithon is about as dangerous an individual as you will encounter in your lives. And Eadwulf and Astrid are likely not too far behind, or maybe they have- They can't be as powerful as you are. They have a bit of a head start on me, Jester. far behind, or maybe they've... They can't be as powerful as you are.
Starting point is 00:16:49 They have a bit of a head start on me, Jester. How? Were they there longer? What? They didn't drop out. Yeah, but you have so many spells, you're so powerful, and you've been learning from lots of different sources. They only had the one source.
Starting point is 00:17:07 Well, they didn't take a nap for a decade. But, just be ready for anything. He is powerful, Ikithon, but they, I can only guess at some of the things they have done since I knew them, but there is much that I do know, and they made the ultimate sacrifice for country. How old were you when you were here?
Starting point is 00:17:41 I was a young man, I was 16. 16? Yeah. Wait, you slept for 10 years? Or is this just like a figure of speech? Yeah. Rip Van Widowcast. I was not in my right mind for a long time. I understand.
Starting point is 00:18:11 So you weren't actually sleeping? Were you sleeping? No. Technically, no. Okay, because I, okay. Was someone else controlling you? At that time. At that time? No, not at that time.
Starting point is 00:18:35 There are some gaps for some of you. Could we go somewhere a little more private than the street? Yeah. Yes, of course. Okay, I would like to try to navigate our way to some sort of an inn. Okay, yeah. You're still not here!
Starting point is 00:19:05 Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. It's still the same day, right? It's still the same day that we left Veth? Since the morning, yes. Okay, so we're calling you tomorrow. Take your time. Okay. Nice going.
Starting point is 00:19:16 Just keep chilling. I'm fine. Wait, no, aren't you coming here this morning? Hmm. Are you looking for an in here in the Shimmer Ward, or are you looking for something a little more? Something very rudimentary. Okay, yeah, easy enough. Back to the,
Starting point is 00:19:32 not too far from where you first arrived at the Rexxentrum Archive of the Cobalt Soul. You find a small corner of two dingy roads in that maybe can house, has about six rooms for rent. So you can house a handful of people per chamber. Okay. But it's really inexpensive. I'd say for,
Starting point is 00:19:59 it's about two silver pieces to rent a room. I will rent it just to be perfunctory about two silver pieces to rent a room. I will rent it just to be perfunctory and find, and there's eating down below. This isn't so much like a lunch tavern, more than just a place to stay. It'll do. They do have snacks. No, it'll do. I will lead everyone up to the room that I've rented.
Starting point is 00:20:26 This place is nice, Caleb. We're only going to stay for a moment. I'm not comfortable. There are gaps. Astrid and Eadwulf were willing to do anything that Ikithon asked of them. And their final test was to kill their own flesh and blood. And they did so.
Starting point is 00:21:03 And I am like them. Was. Am. Am like them. Was. You share a road with a lot of people. It doesn't mean that they're all the same, especially when you take a crossroads. So you did it?
Starting point is 00:21:38 I have considered sharing all this for a long time, but you cherish your family so much. And I suppose I enjoyed being seen as I should have been or could have been. I just go up and give him a hug. There is a reason I have never told you
Starting point is 00:22:25 about my mother and father. You must have been so sad, Caleb. I'm sorry you felt like you had to hide that. Well, I've been lying to you. And I am sorry. We lie. We lie about things all the time to protect other people. Sometimes to protect ourselves.
Starting point is 00:23:07 I don't blame you for that. Whatever we're doing here, I've come home in the hopes of atoning. And that idea has evolved quite a bit over time. And I'm not sure what the exact answer is, but I mean to atone. And I'm not sure what the exact answer is, but I mean to atone.
Starting point is 00:23:54 What does atonement look like to you, Caleb? Well, I feel like the things that I've seen, no one should see. Never again. So we should put a stop to it, then. Well, it's complicated, isn't it? It's wrapped up in the ruling of a nation. You've come a long way since me, you, and Nott were huddled up in that hotel room.
Starting point is 00:24:48 I said then you had a responsibility and that none of us would see you differently. No one should be put through that. No. No one blames you. One person does. Anyway, I find it hard to imagine walking in there tomorrow and
Starting point is 00:25:20 you not knowing the whole picture. That's the whole picture. That's the whole picture. I want to learn a little bit what's going on in my colleagues' heads. We saw them. We were handing off the beacon. They didn't...
Starting point is 00:25:55 They looked pretty far gone. I have to try. You think there's something redeemable? You think they're worth saving? They're worth saving, yeah. Whether or not we can, I don't know. Did they ever waver? Or have they remained believers this entire time?
Starting point is 00:26:29 Well, as children, no. Not to my recollection. We were very avid in our duties. So you never wavered either? Mm. No. And it was the... the final act that made you change your beliefs? So much time was put into stamping me into a specific
Starting point is 00:27:18 shape. It was comforting to know your place and serve the greater good. But I failed my people. My people. I feel like they failed you.
Starting point is 00:27:52 Yeah, didn't your family send you off to the Academy, didn't they? They believed those same things, right? To a degree. Yes, my parents were very big believers in the Empire, but they also loved me as wholly as your family, Caduceus, or yours. It's not a failure on your part.
Starting point is 00:28:30 It's a failure on the Empire's. I don't think that it's by coincidence that your core beliefs that you were doing something for the greater good led you to us and what we're doing now. That's the truth. Well, it remains to be seen what we can do, but maybe we can do. I had this conversation with Fjord the other night.
Starting point is 00:29:11 We were still in Rumblecusp. Think we're doing good? What we're doing as a group? I do. I mean, that's pretty dope, right? Yeah, the Mighty Nein is pretty dope. Fuck yeah. The stage is a little bit bigger.
Starting point is 00:29:48 I have a question. Would they do this with every student at the Academy, or were you just a select few that was chosen? Trent has an eye for talent. And to my understanding, we were just the latest. We were not the first and we were not to be the last. But you three were a bit of a class. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:25 Boy, I have thought a lot about this for a long time and talked to no one about it. I don't know all the answers, but we certainly all came from humble means. No family name to speak of. I was very good at what I did, even at a young age. Eadwulf was
Starting point is 00:30:56 not only very capable, but he was strong, and I think that caught Tren'Zai. And Astrid, Strong, and I think that caught Trent's eye. An astrid... Maybe he's a bit like... Trent, maybe that's unkind. She had a hunger. Ambition. Do you think the Academy knows what he does? Who, Trent?
Starting point is 00:31:29 Yeah, do you think Ludinus goes, okay, Trent, now go find the people and now have them go do horrible things? Or do you think it's like he knows that Trent finds these good wizards and brings them up to the forefront? Do you think anybody else knows the brutal things that he does?
Starting point is 00:31:45 Someone knows. I don't. The Academy, I do not believe knows. The Assembly. The Assembly, someone has to know. Some of them. Ludinus intimated that he had some idea. Well, I hate them all now. Just so I have it clear,
Starting point is 00:32:04 we're going to try and redeem Astrid and Edelwolf, but Trent, fuck him, right? Or are you trying to? Yeah, I mean, it's always been a fuck Trent, right? Just to be clear. Oh no, do you sort of like Trent? Do you have some weird thing because he treated you nice a long time ago?
Starting point is 00:32:32 I think a goal is always better than a grudge. What's the goal? That's very fair. I have my theories. Yeah. Well, I have said many times that I would like to surgically remove the bad parts. It's not all bad here. But it seems impossible.
Starting point is 00:32:58 This can't go on. No more of this. It could go on. It has for a long time. Well, there's a goal. Yeah. No more of this. It could go on. It has for a long time. Well, there's a goal. Yeah. No more. Whether that means exposing him or stopping him, maybe we will land on that,
Starting point is 00:33:18 but I need to know more about what different members of the Assembly believe. If he's been teaching for that long, is there a chance that there are members in the Assembly who were his student at one point in time? No. But just because you're his student doesn't mean that you're one of his protégés, right?
Starting point is 00:33:40 Is there a chance there's more like you? It's what I'm getting at. Got away. Maybe there are more allies out there. That's a very good question. I do not know the answer. I spent a very long time trying to stay as far away as possible.
Starting point is 00:34:02 Quite possibly not alone. Well, I take a lot of faith by what we achieved on the ocean. This nation doesn't need to be steeped in fear. The Empire slighted the Dynasty. It has taken a cherished religious artifact from them. Bloodshed has stopped because we merely gave them what was theirs. If that is not a lesson for people in power,
Starting point is 00:34:52 maybe they do not deserve the power. Or maybe this system is too corrupt, I don't know. I think it depends on how deep the corruption has gone. If it's worth saving. If something's too far poisoned, maybe it's better to burn it to the ground and start something fresh. You and your brethren,
Starting point is 00:35:25 you dabble in this. It's more or less what we do. Yeah. It's kind of our mission statement, is what I just said. Mm-hmm. Would they... If he needs to be cut out... Oh yeah. Would they stand by?
Starting point is 00:35:46 Yeah. The kobold soul in the Cerberus Assembly have butted heads for decades. It's kind of the checks and balances system. And I just try to not let myself be too naive to the fact that corruption exists everywhere. I think I can be an expositor, utilize the resources given to me,
Starting point is 00:36:17 and not have to be blind to the flaws. What about taint within the Cobalt Soul? Possible? Of course. Have you seen it? No. Not to my knowledge. Not to my knowledge, not really. If there has been, it's been dealt with so swiftly
Starting point is 00:36:40 that by the time anyone discovers, it's already gone. Or it's so far up the chain that nobody knows. Right. I mean, it's hard to tell at a certain point. But as far as you know, there are those, of course, any sort of structure that do fall to corruption. But because it is a worldwide network, there's a lot more accountability
Starting point is 00:37:07 than other more locally political structures. So it has a higher success rate. It's the common belief in the soul to share what knowledge is known, especially amongst the branches. Well, tomorrow night can be a first step, but one, I need Veth, and two, we are road hard. We cannot show up tomorrow night looking like this.
Starting point is 00:37:50 Should take the puka shell necklace off, then. Mm-hmm. All right. I think it's a good look. Thanks. The urge to show up in the Dynasty Finest is almost overpowering. We talked about going back tonight
Starting point is 00:38:06 for dinner and getting ceviche. That's true. We could go back to Nicodranas and clean up real good, you know. Got lots of fancy clothes at the Lava Chateau. We still have those outfits, don't we, there? Our evening wear? Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:26 Did he say that the dress was formal? Is that a thing? Do we have to? Just curious if it was stated. No, it was not. Not formal or not stated? Not stated. I think you should step it up
Starting point is 00:38:43 and make them feel underdressed. That's true, that's true. Step it up? We are fully outnumbering them, so they will feel out of place in their own home. Do clean up well. They wouldn't poison us, would they? I'll try and be prepared for that.
Starting point is 00:39:03 Oh, yes, yes. Okay. would they? I'll try and be prepared for that. Oh, yes, yes. Okay. I could also be the taste tester, right? Do you have some shit where you're... Would you know if you'd been poisoned, though? I can will poison out of my pores. Sure you can. Ew, I bet it would smell so bad after you do it, though.
Starting point is 00:39:23 Oh yeah, absolutely. Does your sweat smell after that? Yeah. Yeah, like. So you've eaten a lot of garlic. I was going to say rotten mushrooms. Ew, we have a pot of mushrooms we've stowed for too long.
Starting point is 00:39:32 Maybe it smells like asparagus pee. There you go, there you go. Like definite, like you know. Yeah. Oh. She was poisoned, she was definitely poisoned. Oh boy. Oh. Ugh. It's a pheromone. She was definitely poisoned. Oh boy. Oh.
Starting point is 00:39:45 It's a pheromone. Doing it to myself. Asparagus, god. All right. Do you know that only happens to some people? Okay. The asparagus and pee thing? Yeah, not everybody gets the asparagus and pee smell.
Starting point is 00:40:00 Weird. Some people named Liam. The more you know. Well, you have effectively a day and a half or so until that dinner invitation, so what would you like to do in the interim? Should we send a message? Do you want me to send a message to Trent and let him know that we'll be there?
Starting point is 00:40:21 I can ask what the dress code is. Oh, jeez. I think there is nothing I would love more than for you to send a message to Master Ikithon accepting his invitation. You got it, Caleb. I'm going to send a message. Okay.
Starting point is 00:40:46 Dearest Trent, hey, got your message to Caleb. We will def be there. Can't wait to see what your house looks like. Any dress code? Ooh. Dang. I'm getting good at this, you guys.
Starting point is 00:41:06 Gross. Rapid response comes. Ah, well then, I look forward to seeing all of you. No particular dress code. Wear what is comfortable, please. That's all. Fancy. 19 words, pretty good. He's got a slimy, slimy voice,
Starting point is 00:41:30 but he says we can wear whatever's comfortable. I say we wear formal wear. Agreed. Or should we wear our armor? That might be important. I'm just going into an enemy's house. We can wear our armor and then some fancy accents. How about that?
Starting point is 00:41:55 Yeah, do you have any rip-away dresses, you know? So we can wear gear, but then be like, skunk! Technically, aren't all clothes rip-away if you're strong enough? You're right. Yep. Oh, this is real good, hold on. But seriously, please treat this like we are going in on a fact-finding mission,
Starting point is 00:42:12 but also be prepared for it to be a total bloodbath. Thought it. Always. Could, could, parameters. Be prepared for murder. Yep. So wait, is our goal to murder him tomorrow night? Should we, if there's an opportunity, should we just murder him? Let's make that plan G.
Starting point is 00:42:32 G. For tomorrow. I'm very proud of you. I was expecting that to be plan C. Plan G is, that's growth. Well, we need to figure out if there are more people to murder. So. Okay.
Starting point is 00:42:49 Or people who've been waiting for the moment to get, get out from under his thumb. We just need to know more. Do you think all this time that maybe, do you feel like when you were here, do you feel like you were being controlled? Or was it your choice? Do you feel like maybe they were subtly controlling you
Starting point is 00:43:14 and you just didn't know? Oh no. No, Jester. No. I am a different person in every way. I relished my work. We were riding high,
Starting point is 00:43:45 serving the king. Tasting power. This is why it... This is why I have never... It's hard. I think that was the first time I've ever heard you admit or recognize that you were a different person back then. Good work.
Starting point is 00:44:25 Ceviche? Yeah, how do I want to do this? Do you have a thingy? I thought you said you have a thingy. Yeah, I have a thingy we could impose on our wizard friend again, or we could just go straight to your house. Let's go straight to the house, why not? Let's do that thing while we're at your house,
Starting point is 00:44:48 by the way, the poof, where we make the circle and then the teleporty thingy. The teleporty thingy at the house? At your mom's house, we could set up the- Oh, we can make our thingy! Yeah, the thingy. I love it, okay. We'll do that. We have to make a little temple, you know. I love making little temples. Okay. Oh, by the way our thingy! Yeah, the thingy. I love it, okay. We'll do that. We have to make a little temple, you know. I love making little temples. Okay.
Starting point is 00:45:08 Oh, by the way, when we went shopping, we bought two regular healing potions. Does anyone not have one? Oh. Rummaging through my bag. I mean, I don't think I have a healing potion. Maybe I do. Hold on. Any up for grabs? One. Is that all we got?
Starting point is 00:45:23 Yeah, we only got two. Oh, I've got a healing potion. And some dope-ass jewelry. Yeah. That is a really beautiful ring. Thank you. Got it for steal. Wait, how many of those?
Starting point is 00:45:39 Two, two and two. No, no, the, uh. Yeah, the fire? The fire things. Dos. No, I thought we got more than that. I thought it was like a pack of... This shit had said two. I No, I thought we got more than that. I thought it was like a pack of. This shit had said two. I don't know, I thought it was two. I thought it was a box.
Starting point is 00:45:49 I thought it was like ten. With two balls in them. Is that right? Alchemical fire, alchemist fire. Alchemist fire. It was a box with one, two balls. I feel like it was like a 12-packer. What? I feel like it was a 12-packer.
Starting point is 00:46:02 Yeah. It was a fair amount of them. Oh shit. I rely on you guys to keep track of the items once they get to you. You taking notes? I thought I was... Oh my god. Marisha takes notes. Listen, I have one Celebone, two Oopstones, and two Chuckle Dust. Those are the only things I wrote down that I have.
Starting point is 00:46:20 Well, then you better not use them until you confirm with Danny, then. I'll go consult the Loremaster. I'm going to find thismaster. Hold on. Yeah. I'm going to find this out. Just slack Dani. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Text her.
Starting point is 00:46:30 Yeah. All right. All right, so I will pull out the little turtle statue that Jester gave me from her home. Yay! And grip it in my hand. Don't crush it! Oh, no, my grip is so weak, I have a strength of 10. And don't let it hurt you.
Starting point is 00:46:50 It is, in fact, jabbing straight through my palm. The circle took some futzing, but this is instantaneous, so he just mutters a few words and then. All of us? Do we have to be holding hands or anything? I do not believe you have to be holding hands. We can. Oh. Just to be safe. Right?
Starting point is 00:47:08 This one? No. Okay, wow, we just whirled. Caleb just disappears. Yeah, that sucks. Aw, shit. Later, bitches! Savi-jay! This is part of it, right? This is part of it?
Starting point is 00:47:21 Yeah. This is part of it? This is part of it. Yeah, you don't have to touch hands. You have to be within 10 feet of you. Okay. So yes, as you all gather in a small circle, Caleb mutters something under his breath, and then no circle on the ground,
Starting point is 00:47:34 no extended preparation, you all just suddenly feel that drifting sensation in your stomach. That brief rising, almost weightless sensation for a split second, and then with a blink of light, where are they? We are in the lobby of the Lavish Chateau. You guys are now right in the center of the now shaded interior of the Lavish Chateau, midday in Nicodranas.
Starting point is 00:47:58 As you land there, you can hear there's a little bit of music playing. It's not too terribly crowded. There's maybe four individuals that are in from their dock work just getting a drink. A little higher than their pay grade, but because they like the way it's made here. Also, momentarily, you hear what sounds like a
Starting point is 00:48:13 . MATT and LAURA, LAURA, and LAURA, and you glance over and see Nugget just apparate as well. Nugget! MATT and LAURA, LAURA, and then runs up and like... It's me, it's just a...
Starting point is 00:48:29 Your original mommy, but I understand if you don't feel like I'm your mommy anymore. And just licking your hand. Now, Nugget's been gone here for quite some time, being watched by Marion, and is significantly larger than you last remember him being. Still nowhere near a full-grown blink dog, but kind of in between the period,
Starting point is 00:48:47 maybe from nose to tail about that big. And so is still kind of like a bit of an unwieldy creature for the expectation. I like to think that Nugget blinks back and forth between the Lava Chateau and Veth's family home. Yeah, we'll say for the past number of hours with your arrival, there's been a bit, especially with Luke living here,
Starting point is 00:49:07 Luke has taken a personal interest in playing with Nugget in the time that he spent here. How do Sprinkle and Nugget get along? Well, one's alive. I thought you were a chew toy! Nugget comes over to our house and just poops and then goes back. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:24 What the fuck? He's just like, it's been an experience. Everyone. Hard to catch him, that asshole. But yeah, nevertheless, you are here in the chateau, and Nicodranas is your oyster. Should we crush Veth? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:42 The Bernardo family, see what they're up to? Oh, I should find out exactly where she lives. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll go ask Mama. And I run upstairs with Nugget. You run upstairs. As you're running up the stairs to Nugget, you hear the p-p-p-p-p-p,
Starting point is 00:49:54 and then his foot falls stop, and you look up, and he's already waiting for you at the top of the landing. Oh, you're such a cool dog! You head up into the room, and as you kind of, you knock on the door, just push in. Which do you do?
Starting point is 00:50:07 Knock on the door and push in. Okay. As you go inside, you can see your mother is currently sitting at her little vanity and is in the process of brushing her hair back and turns around and goes, Oh, Chester, you're back already? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:22 You know, we can just come now whenever. Like, literally, we can just stop in for a night all the time now. Well, you are welcome to come whenever you wish to, please. Should I let you know? I mean, maybe just for the sake of... Might be a very busy night. But if you're coming to visit, give me a little bit of a heads up, and I am more than happy to have you.
Starting point is 00:50:43 That is wonderful news. Yeah, so we can just stay here till night. We're going to have some dinner. We're going to check out, oh, we're going to check out Veth's house. I should probably find out where that is. Oh, right this way. Okay. She stands up and tucks her little stool beneath the vanity,
Starting point is 00:50:57 leads you over to the balcony, and points across the way of the open, this section of the Opal Archways from where the Lav Chateau is, there is this very, circular-style thoroughfare, like this main plaza area in the center. There's a fountain, and you can see there's a number of these silk streamers
Starting point is 00:51:15 that attach from the top of the fountain to the different corners of this region. She points over to this one collection of buildings that have abodes in both floors and series. It looks like the equivalent of an apartment complex, if you will, but very, very well built and beautiful, and points over towards the corner and goes, That is where the Bernatos have been living.
Starting point is 00:51:37 Oh, perfect. We will go over there, but I'll be back, okay? Of course, I'll be here if you need me. Okay. As I start to run away, I stop and turn around at the door and say, Have you heard anything else from Lord Sharp? Not at the moment, but he has, he hasn't been a client for a bit of time.
Starting point is 00:52:05 Not anything since the party? No. Okay. Why? I was just wondering. I was just wondering. Okay. I love you. I love you, too, Jester.
Starting point is 00:52:19 And I run down the stairs. Okay. So, as you all have gathered at the bottom of the Lava Chateau, where are you off to? I tell her exactly. I'll tell everybody where Veth lives. Should we head off there immediately?
Starting point is 00:52:35 We need our ninth member. Let's go. Kick down her door. Break all of her plates. Eat all of her food. Like friends do. Drink all of her booze eat all of her food. Like friends do. Drink all of her booze. It's going to be great.
Starting point is 00:52:48 Now, Veth, what have you been up to since they've been gone? Well, it's only been like 10 hours. So not a whole lot. We had a day, we walked around, went to the beach, went to the farmer's market, had a lunch outside. We were probably cooking,
Starting point is 00:53:08 getting ready for a really nice dinner. A little dinner. Yeah, went knock, knock, knock, I guess. Knock, knock. Hey! Oh god, it smells so good! Oh shoot, where are you looking? What are you looking?
Starting point is 00:53:23 Oh, have me some of that. We have some chairs? We can pull up some chairs. I can just sit. We have four chairs. Yeah, I can run it. I can get some things. I didn't realize we were having company. I didn't either. They just left. This is on the floor. It's okay.
Starting point is 00:53:36 I don't mind. No, no, no. We'll sit on the floor. We made sausages and things. What a nice balcony! I can sleep on the balcony. You're sleeping in here? No, no, no, we can sleep at the lava chateau. There's plenty of rooms there.
Starting point is 00:53:48 It's fine. I put Luc on my shoulder. Oh, that's tall. I'll be right back. I'm just going to make a quick trip to just grab a few things that we- Do you need any help? I'm fine. I can get to and from pretty quick. Okay, well, you hurry back.
Starting point is 00:54:02 Oh shit, I think I just stepped in dog shit. Oh my god. Just go, I'll clean it up by the time you get back. Okay. Yasha, be careful, the boy's head is practically scraping the ceiling. Yeah, yeah, maybe duck a little bit. You okay up there?
Starting point is 00:54:18 Yeah. This is so cool! Careful of the ceiling fan. He's now doing his arm flexing muscle. Ooh, so strong. He's a tough boy. Wow, you guys were gone so long. Do we have a new mission?
Starting point is 00:54:40 So much has happened. Oh my gosh, so much. Recap everything that happened in order. And we do. Thank you. Wow. What a detailed account. Word for word.
Starting point is 00:55:00 Wow. Anyway, my god, so we're going to dinner with the enemy. That's crazy. Yes. Tomorrow, did you say, or two days? Tomorrow night, we can enjoy the evening here. Yes, yes, yes. And then tomorrow, are there preparations
Starting point is 00:55:22 that we need to make, like, you know, like a code word or anything? Or should I bring a bomb in case the things go awry? Ooh, good call. Really? Do you have a bomb just sitting around? Yeah, bombs are always smart to have around, just in case. Or we've got Yeza here. I could have him make some sort of,
Starting point is 00:55:45 I can have him make some sort of alchemical thing that we just sprinkle into Ikithon's brim. And makes him shit all over himself. Yeah, yeah, I was thinking kill him, but you know. Or he could just shit all over himself. Can you imagine how embarrassed that would be, though? That would be! If he just shit all over himself at the table in his own house?
Starting point is 00:56:05 That would be pretty good. Oh my gosh. I think our chances of murdering Trent Ikithon in his home are slim to none. Good to know, good to know. What if we lure him out onto a balcony or something? What if we go to dinner? And eat it? Eat it.
Starting point is 00:56:27 After Beauregard eats it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Give it to Beauregard, she'll try anything. Mm-hmm. And see what we see. But I guess, just to be clear, if there does happen to be a chance where we can murder him, should we?
Starting point is 00:56:44 Or should we just take that? I think we're following his lead. Caleb's lead, yeah? Okay. No sudden moves. Yeah. And this trip northward to the Frigid Country, is that immediately after dinner or days later?
Starting point is 00:56:58 It's like a week from now. End of the week. So we don't need to be prepared for a quick, like, thanks for dinner, Trent, let's get the fuck out of here. We don't need to do that or anything a quick, like, thanks for dinner, Trent. Let's get the fuck out of here. We don't need to do that or anything, right? Only if dinner goes really poorly. Only if we stay at Trent's place for a week.
Starting point is 00:57:11 We should get some winter clothes together, you guys. I have nothing. It's going to be so cold. Top of the world, yeah. Is there, is there, is there shopping here? I mean, yeah, but. But not winter shop? No, I think Rexxentrum is better. We can have anything custom made,
Starting point is 00:57:31 yeah, but it's colder there. Yeah, yeah. A little better stuff. All right, so I think I got enough for everybody. Oh, let me take that. No, I'll take it. He's like a six-pack! Oh, you got a six-pack! Awesome! Would you help cook a little bit?
Starting point is 00:57:46 Yeah, no, let me, let's get it there. Oh, it's really tiny in here. How do you do that? Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh. Oh, yeah. Maybe you can just get down on your knees, Caduceus. I'm going to just sit.
Starting point is 00:57:58 I'm just not even on my, I'm just going to sit down. I'll get a stool for you, just. Oh, no, the floor is fine. This is really low. Okay, no worries. Just help me cut these up, and I'll go ahead and get sauteing. I've got it, you for you, just. Oh no, the floor is fine. This is really low. Okay, no worries. Help me cut these up and I'll go ahead and get sauteing. I've got it, you guys continue, sorry. We rented the halfling apartment, but we should have rented a full-size one.
Starting point is 00:58:14 The rent of rent is. You know what? Here. Yes, take 500 gold and just get us another place nearby in case this happens again. Where are you getting all this money? It's crazy, we find money all over the place. 100 gold and just get us another place nearby in case this happens again. Where are you getting all this money? It's crazy, we find money all over the place. This bunch we found in a volcano.
Starting point is 00:58:36 It's true. So you weren't joking, you actually were in a volcano? Yeah, yeah, yeah, we know. That wasn't a metaphorical volcano, that was a real volcano. I thought you were just on an emotional journey with your friends and... I mean, it was also cathartic for many other reasons,
Starting point is 00:58:49 but no, no, this was a literal volcano. So this tentacled, multi-eyed beast wasn't some sort of projection of your internal... It wasn't a fear of commitment. Actual... No, it was real, yeah. It is terrifying. It's a hard story. Luke's like, it's so cool!
Starting point is 00:59:04 It's a hard story to tell with Luke around, to be honest. It's what, a bad story to tell? It's a hard story to tell. Many of the details are maybe not for... No, it's the best story. It was a giant black, multi-tensile monster. We'll find out sooner or later, man. Fire coming out of his skin,
Starting point is 00:59:23 and he breathed fire, and he had multiple eyes, and he sent you these mental images of this really scary place. Why didn't you kill him, Mom? Duh! Yes! Your mom had the final blow. She took him down with one shot.
Starting point is 00:59:39 Murdered him straight up. He has his horn in the corner like. Finger, finger, finger. Okay, okay. I mean, that's greatly impressive. Be careful. Of course, of course, always careful. Safety first, right? That's the Mighty Nein's motto.
Starting point is 00:59:55 And then we were throwing penises into a volcano, in the same volcano, and this god came down. Don't worry, they weren't real penises. We made them first. They were real penises. They were toy penises. Here! Dad, what's a penis? And he's just like, oh. Oh no.
Starting point is 01:00:10 Oh. Oh, there was a gold one, but it got stuck in this woman's hand. It was incredible. What? Forever. He's like, oh, uh, honey? Sorry, we'll tone it down a little bit. It's going to be the best art enemy.
Starting point is 01:00:26 But. Hey, Luke. Yeah. Luke. What? You want to learn our secret handshake, though, from the island? Yeah. Just go, Chaos Rage. Chaos Rage. It's like, no, no, no, no, no, no!
Starting point is 01:00:37 Yeah. Here, here, here. Give him a fucking firework. Take his mind off. Wait, here, here, here. Yeah, let's shoot some fireworks off from the balcony. I want a fucking firework to take his mind off. Yeah, let's shoot some fireworks up on the balcony. I want a fucking firework. Yeah! Do we have any more T-Rex?
Starting point is 01:00:49 Did anyone bring home T-Rex in a pouch or something? A T-Rex tooth? Oh yeah, we all have a tooth! Hey, Luc, why don't you go play with your friend, Vanishing Dog, or whatever his name is. Nugget, his name is Nugget. Nugget, that's the one. I slip Luc some bottle rockets. Make a sleight of hand check. Okay. Finishing Dog, or whatever his name is. Nugget, his name is Nugget. Nugget, that's the one.
Starting point is 01:01:05 I slip Luke some bottle rockets. Make a sleight of hand check. Okay. He's going to burn the house down. Oh my god, please don't bust his hand off. Also, does your house have a yard? If he does, though, I'll be able to fix it, don't worry. No.
Starting point is 01:01:18 11. There must be a courtyard. It's a condo. He hasn't seized it, those Malibu houses. He was like, Tell me, what was it like to grow up as Luc? Jessa walks over and takes the rockets from Luc. Aw.
Starting point is 01:01:35 When he's old enough. How old is he? How old is Luc? Do you have? At the beginning, I felt he was around three or four. No, he's like, No, he's around three or four. No, he's like... I feel like he's like six or seven. No, he's like four. He's four?! Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:49 Oh my god, but you know, halflings are different. Yeah, they're much older. He's that little? Oh, now I feel really bad. You gave a four-year-old bottle rockets. You gave a four-year-old a crossbow! Perfectly safe toy. Also, a four-year-old bottle rockets. You gave a four-year-old a crossbow! Perfectly safe toy.
Starting point is 01:02:07 Also, your four-year-old should know what his penis is. Yeah, a four-year-old should definitely know. We call it a wee-wee. Oh. A wee-wee. Yeah, the term he was unfamiliar with. Got it. We don't use medical terms around him.
Starting point is 01:02:20 You know, my mom believed in medical terms. Just put it right out there. Really? Yeah, that way you never, you know, get confused. Put the penis right out there? Just the words. Dinner's ready! All right. Three or four?
Starting point is 01:02:38 Well, I was confused! He acts. He's very precocious. He reads at a sixth-year-old level, I mean. Oh yeah, well. Sixth grade level. Holy shit, he's brilliant. So, you enjoy a fine meal cooked by the team of Yeza and Caduceus.
Starting point is 01:03:05 Catch up a bit more on the stories about your all perspectives on the experience, Rumblecusp, and you're able to speak on whatever as much as you'd like to about your future plans, if at all. But nevertheless, the evening grows dark, the sun sets, and is there anything you wish to accomplish for the night here in Mechadranas? I'm going to take a walk to the lighthouse.
Starting point is 01:03:28 Oh. Okay. All right. After the meal is done, and it is a nice filling meal, some of you rest to digest for a bit and watch Luc begin to act out his interpretations of the things that his mother did. Starts taking his still slightly dangerous
Starting point is 01:03:48 for a child his age crossbow. Four-year-old. Got to learn something. Yep. Well, Caduceus, you go ahead and make your way out along the sand scraped cobblestones of the opal archwaysways passing down towards the harbor, drawn towards the image of the large lighthouse of the Wild Mother.
Starting point is 01:04:15 You can see the gradual shifting of the beam across the cloudless, starry night sky. You can hear the sound of waves crashing against the rocks and beach. cloudless, starry night sky. You can hear the sound of waves crashing against the rocks and beach. You can hear the occasional whistles and bells from ships that are coming into and going back out to harbor.
Starting point is 01:04:40 This is perfect. I'm going to cast Word of Recall. Okay. I guess it recalls something? Didn't you say Total Recall? Total Recall. Word of Total Recall? Wait.
Starting point is 01:04:58 You have to do it in a, it's not a, if you get the little temple, I don't. All right, so. Are you leaving the party? As you, explain how you cast the spell. Take in the lighthouse, and I reach into my bag for some of the mushrooms and fruit and dirt that I keep from home, that my tea comes from. And I just slowly
Starting point is 01:05:28 drop it at the edge of the lighthouse as I walk around it as much as I can and let it start to take root and use the decompose to just let it begin to grow at its accelerated rate. Okay. Connect it to my temple. Okay.
Starting point is 01:05:52 As you finish your pass around, which the lighthouse is on the edge of the cliff, so there are a few precarious edges that you toss and let the wind do the rest for you. And as you do, you toss a bit of this mulch, if you will, into the wind and watch as a breeze blows it back into the lighthouse and it slides down into the bits of cliff-edged dirt
Starting point is 01:06:17 and seagrass that are barely cusping off the edge. And as you return back to the point where you had begun this, you can already see small, peeking caps beginning to make their way through. As you finish concentrating, close your eyes, taking a deep breath and muttering your prayer to the Wild Mother. With your eyes closed, the lightless expanse around you,
Starting point is 01:06:45 through your eyelids, you see a faint, warm, pale white-green glow in the shape of the lighthouse itself pierce into your mind's eye. As you slowly open your eyes, that glow remains hanging for about a second longer. It's almost like the lighthouse itself is the one, is emitting light as a central beacon as opposed to the actual beam.
Starting point is 01:07:11 And as that fades, you look down and the mushrooms are now fully grown, as if weeks had passed in a matter of moments. And you feel a deep anchored connection to this lighthouse. With a little luck, we won't need this, but... We'll try to deal with what you've put in front of us. Thank you. I'll take the slow walk back to the chateau.
Starting point is 01:07:46 Okay. I'm going to walk back to the Lava Chateau. Mm-hmm. Actually, are we all going back there to sleep tonight? You said you were putting us up there, yeah. Okay, okay, okay. I'll do this when we get back then. Okay.
Starting point is 01:08:01 But I will step away for a moment, and I'm going to just... Is there a balcony here? Is there someone where I can be a little private, Veth? Oh yeah, sure. There's a little courtyard and there's a rooftop deck. Really? Oh, it came with the HOA.
Starting point is 01:08:17 Wow. I'm going to go up to the rooftop deck. Okay. I'm going to sit down and I'm going to cast Scry on Lord Robert Sharp. All right. And see what the fuck he's doing. Okay. As you sit there for a second, looking over,
Starting point is 01:08:40 from this perspective, it's a beautiful view of the archways of the buildings of similar height. And you can see, because the archways exists a little bit on a higher hill than a lot of the rest of the city, which descends around before it gets to the edge of the cliffside. So from this rooftop view at night, it's this beautiful landscape
Starting point is 01:08:57 of hundreds and hundreds of lantern lights of different colors, through different colored glass and lanterns. So it's this beautiful view. And as you sit, the still somewhat warm ocean air coming in, you close your eyes and concentrate. In that moment, you sense across from you, hands taking yours, and a familiar voice goes,
Starting point is 01:09:23 So you want to go peek in on that disgusting being? Just want to make sure that, you know, I'm not going to get in trouble for what we pulled at the party. Let's go have a look, shall we? Okay. And as you close your eyes, you feel your consciousness extend a bit,
Starting point is 01:09:42 almost like the Traveler is taking your hand and pulling your spirit from your body for about a moment. consciousness extend a bit, almost like the traveler is taking your hand and pulling your spirit from your body for about a moment. And in that passage, you bring yourself immediately to the exterior of a beautiful mansion, this estate that exists on the kind of northeastern side of Nicodranas.
Starting point is 01:10:00 And there, suddenly, you see him sitting in some sort of a dark red leather study. Books everywhere. He's in a long, loose silk robe over just some comfortable, expensive clothing. And it looks like he's in the process of reading, just casually. What is he reading? Can I see?
Starting point is 01:10:21 Make a perception check. Oh, which one would it be? Got to pick a good one. 13. 13. Can't quite make out the details, but you can get a good view of him. He looks like he hasn't been sleeping well, but not much else to really pick up on him.
Starting point is 01:10:47 Is there anybody there with him? Not from what you can tell, since the focus of this particular Scrying Beacon is him. You can just make out some of the colors in the room around him and the furniture he's immediately on, which is like a lounging couch with that dark red leather. That's about it. Okay. So he's not currently at the moment hunting you down,
Starting point is 01:11:08 if that's what you were worried about. No, no, no, just, you know. All right. The book is called How to Kill Jester. I know, right? How to kill Jester. So you got cut out on a balcony with your wang out. Second edition.
Starting point is 01:11:30 Okay. I guess I'll stop scrying then. Okay. As you return, the voice of the Traveler echoes through your mind. Well, at least we didn't catch him with his wang in his hand. That would've been better, though. Hmm. Some things even I don't want to see.
Starting point is 01:11:48 Then as you open your eyes again, you briefly think you see the flutter of a cloak, but it's just a leaf drifting by in the wind. There's no trees immediately nearby, so the source of the leaf is a little strange. You go back inside. Okay. Any other business before the night is done? and we'll leave as a little strange. We go back inside. Okay. Any other business before the night is done?
Starting point is 01:12:13 Negative. I think when we all get back to the chateau and we're laughing and have had a good time, I go for dinner and it's all winding down, I say, hey, you have talked so much about your time as a child with your fey friend here, and all the time you were trapped in your room. Would you show us your room? I'm so curious.
Starting point is 01:12:34 We've been in this building so many times, and I've always wondered what your childhood bedroom looked like. Guys, want to see my room? I feel like I'm not. Sure. I think I saw it when you dressed me up in your dress one time, but I, it's a sight to behold.
Starting point is 01:12:48 Yeah, yeah, come on up. I'll go up and show them. Good, I needed to go to my room anyway, so this is perfect. Okay, Jester leads you up to the chamber where she spent the majority of her life, and you may describe it to them as you see fit. Oh my gosh.
Starting point is 01:13:05 There's a very ornate little bed in the room. Lots of ruffles. It's like a four post bed, sort of. Canopy bed. There's a canopy. There's lots of little trinkets everywhere. Little sculptures. Some are shitty, some are pretty good. Lots of books.
Starting point is 01:13:28 And all over the walls, starting at the bottom with really not very good drawings. It just covers up, the higher you go, the better the drawings get. As you got taller, you got better. You know, I think talent comes with height. Probably. Yeah. I must be extremely talented, then.
Starting point is 01:13:50 You are, Yasha. You're a big reader. Oh, yeah, what else are you going to do when you're, you know, hanging out in here? Plus, I had a lot of tutors, you know. My mom always said it's very important to be educated so you can be a good conversationalist. Wise woman. Yes.
Starting point is 01:14:10 Yeah. There are a lot of windows in this room. Yeah. It's fun to look out, isn't it? How many times have you climbed out that window? Quite a few. But I was actually pretty good about staying in for a very long time. It wasn't until after the Traveler, really,
Starting point is 01:14:29 that I started sneaking out a little bit more. What do you think? Better than I imagined. You were not lying. Oh, oh, oh! Lay down in the bed. It's okay, it's okay. Just lay down oh! Lay down in the bed. It's okay, it's okay, just lay down. Just lay down in the bed, Caleb.
Starting point is 01:14:50 It's a little small for me, but okay. If you lay down in the bed, up on top of the canopy, I've painted a beautiful landscape of the Nicodranas sea line with the lighthouse and everything, so you can see it looking out. It's like you're looking out the window,
Starting point is 01:15:08 but it's above you. Watch as Nugget leaps up onto the bed as well, and is like, I'm really more of a cat person, but okay. And just pees in the bed. No, Nugget! No, this I am familiar with. Nugget, get down.
Starting point is 01:15:31 I know, what is happening? You really should learn Nugget. Don't pee in the bed. Just go. It's unpunishable. Smells like old times. I was going to sleep here tonight. Now I can't sleep in this bed. Can you help me change the sheets real quick? Does anyone else smell asparagus? It's punishable. Smells like old times. I was going to sleep here tonight, now I can't sleep in this bed.
Starting point is 01:15:45 Anybody smell? You know, if you change the sheets real quick. Ugh. Does anyone else smell asparagus? It's probably gone through to the mattress. I'm going to have to buy a new mattress. Caduceus, magic it away. How? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:15:58 Eldritch Blast. Lack and feathers everywhere. Mama! I wave my hands, and the windows all suddenly snap closed. Okay. Yeah, that works. I don't know what else to tell you. No, no, keep them open. It's a very strong smell.
Starting point is 01:16:19 I make them all open. But while we're here, I am going to also cast Word of Recall here in this room. Okay. This is, if there ever would be a temple to the Traveler, this is it, since I've painted many drawings of him and other things that remind me of him
Starting point is 01:16:42 all through the room. Okay. As you guys are here taking in the space, you watch as Jester smiles and closes her eyes and begins muttering this quiet, as much of a prayer to the travelers there can be. It's more of just a bunch of like, hey, you're pretty cool.
Starting point is 01:16:57 Yeah. This is going to be like a cool town, Paul. This is cool, come to you. Sounds like doo-wah-diddy, I don't know. As she begins to mutter this, it's interesting. The room itself is lit by three separate lanterns that give this warm interior glow. You watch as they all slowly grow dimmer and dimmer,
Starting point is 01:17:16 and as they do, certain drawings in the surrounding chamber begin to get brighter and brighter. You can see numerous dots of green, and you can now see clearly what was mostly hidden amongst this scattering tapestry of sketches throughout her lifetime. How many various interpretations of the Traveler are hidden throughout this room?
Starting point is 01:17:38 And now all of them, one by one, are all giving off this faint green glow until eventually the lanterns are nearly extinguished. And you can see dozens and dozens of these vibrant, almost alighting your faces with the volume of light that's coming from this in a green hue before all the lanterns brighten up once again. You shake your head and the color passes,
Starting point is 01:18:06 and you are now linked. This is a sanctuary for whatever you call it. Great! Did you also do it? Oh yeah, that was my walk earlier. I've got everything. What did you all do? Well, if ever we're in a horrible situation
Starting point is 01:18:21 that Caleb maybe can't get us out of, Caduceus and I will be able to get us back to Nicodranas in a flash. We'll need both of us for everybody, but... Yeah. There's always one of us unconscious, so. Right. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 01:18:39 All right. It just bamfs us back here? Yep. Wow, that's cool. Yeah. Technically, he'll take us a few blocks away, but yeah. Technically, he will. Yeah. Is it very taxing on you to do?
Starting point is 01:18:54 Well, it's almost the top of my skill set, but not quite, if you know what I mean. Oh boy. At face value, I think so. It's not the worst thing, but it's a... We've had a real rough time, and hopefully we still have the energy for it. Yeah. Excellent. And there's two clerics.
Starting point is 01:19:24 Not every group of adventurers is lucky enough to have two clerics. Yeah. Excellent. And there's two clerics. Not every group of adventurers is lucky enough to have two clerics. Yeah. Some don't even have one. Indeed. Foolish people. You almost have more than one healer. Oh!
Starting point is 01:19:36 1.5. Ooh! Oh yeah, oh. That's rough, but. I mean, to be fair, Caduceus is like 1.3 healers. That's true. And Jester's like 0.4, so. That's a lot of healing. Yeah. If you're rounding up, then yeah, you have two healers.
Starting point is 01:19:53 It's like the low path health of healers, 98%. But you guys, look at my pretty dress I painted. Different skills. Clairlock. Different skills. Clairlock. All right. Is there anything else you wish to accomplish for the evening, or shall we bring you to the next morning? Next morning.
Starting point is 01:20:17 Yeah. Next morning! Okay. Caleb will, so quick, Caleb will take out the smaller book and spend 15 minutes writing. Okay. That's all. Cool. All right. You eventually head off to your various chambers throughout the chateau
Starting point is 01:20:33 and find yourselves getting a good night's sleep in a comfortable bed. Oh, I snuggle up with Mama since my bed smells like piss. She doesn't argue. An early morning wakes you all, like piss. She doesn't argue. An early morning wakes you all, as you didn't, especially after your odd sleep schedule and rumble cusp, getting yourselves back on a decent schedule. You go to bed a little early, wake up a little early,
Starting point is 01:20:57 good like 7, 7.30, shortly after dawn, the morning greets you. You all gather downstairs and a morning meal has already been prepared for all of you, courtesy of the Chateau itself. What would you like to do? It's great here, isn't it? The breakfast buffet cannot be beaten.
Starting point is 01:21:17 So good. This is a buffet. I can't even, you can have anything you want. Yeah, and as much as you want. Yeah, it's not like you just get one thing, you have every choice. Plates are so small, though. I don't know how any of you deal with this.
Starting point is 01:21:31 I've went back seven times already. Should I bring my own plate next time? Is that okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah, feel free. Bottomless French toast is amazing. P, P? Bring your own plate? P-Y-O-P. But so much asparagus, is that like a Nicodranas thing? Mm. BYOP. With so much asparagus, is that like a Nicodramas thing?
Starting point is 01:21:50 It grows very well. It's hard to kill once you got it going. Yeah. It's true. I swipe some bacon, put it in my pocket for later. Pocket bacon. Okay. Veth, you can smell the breakfast this early in the morning being cooked across the way.
Starting point is 01:22:04 Come over for breakfast. So what's going on? Are we going or what? Yeah, are Luc and Yeza with you? Yep, they're coming with us. I don't mean that, but they can have some of the free breakfast. They can take, I mean, we have food. Yeah, I know, but this breakfast is like,
Starting point is 01:22:20 it's like going to the Four Seasons for a free breakfast. They eat here every other day. Okay, okay. They are sick of it. Did you try the bottomless French toast, by the way? I just get up and walk over. Get some powdered sugar.
Starting point is 01:22:42 I like it if Yasha just undoes her big gnarly belt, just like one notch. Ooh! I'll just take it off. Everyone's ready for an old day of adventuring. Getting the pancake sweats. I'm going to just fill my haversack with a lot of pastries, because it's been a while.
Starting point is 01:23:04 Yeah, easy enough to do do and there are plenty here, so you can write down your inventory number of pastries. Okay. I will take some as well. Veth, here is a question for you. We are going to be in Rexxentrum for the week. We have a lot of time there and we've been away from your family for so long.
Starting point is 01:23:22 Would you like to bring them with to Rexxentrum? Is it safe? Well, we're going to see my dad. Probably not bring them to that. Well, we won't bring them to that, but I have a perfect place for us to stay while we're there. And they'd be very comfortable. Do we have a place?
Starting point is 01:23:41 Do you have a place to stay there? Yeah. There's an inn that I am intimately familiar with. The gentleman? The gentleman's in red? No, the gentleman's in Zadash. Can we go there? What's going on? I would not say no to that at some point. Are we going to have dinner with the enemy tonight?
Starting point is 01:23:57 You're right, yes, that's happening tonight. Zadash and Pumat will have to wait. If we survive. I want to go see my dad. If I can keep them close to me. Sorry, Zadash. Actually, I am familiar with lodging in both Zadash and Rexxentrum,
Starting point is 01:24:14 where they could house all of us. Okay. Yeah. You've had so little time. I had one day, yes. No, it would be great to keep them around. They could have a little jaunt. Is everybody, I mean, obviously they're not coming,
Starting point is 01:24:28 you know, to a wizard's tower. I think it's a great idea. Good. As long as, you know, Trent won't be spying on us and we'll use Veth's family as sort of like collateral and do something evil. Ooh, yeah, maybe we should leave them here for this until after the Trent dinner, and then we can bring them up.
Starting point is 01:24:47 Yeah, then they can come with us to Zadash and they can see my dad. Okay. Yeah, yeah. I like Zadash, that'll be nice. Yeah, just in case there's a horrible, you know, murder tonight. Murder wizard.
Starting point is 01:25:07 Yeah. You say that so happy. Just rolled off the tongue. But thank you for the offer. So how do we get there? Are you going to teleport us? Well, I would prefer to be at peak capability this evening, if need be, so I would like to use... I have some of that sex potion that I didn't use yet,
Starting point is 01:25:28 if you need that. Maybe on another night. I just mean if we get pulled into danger. So I would prefer to use the library again, if that's all right with you. Oh, yeah. Do we need to go to Yussa to use that? Or can we just go from here and then go there?
Starting point is 01:25:48 No, we can go from anywhere, but we would need to land at the circle at the Cobalt Soul. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's fine. Do I need to be in peak form tonight? Well, you rarely are not, but I would advise it, yeah. Then they probably should not send a message ahead of us. I think we're above that. You're kind of a big deal now.
Starting point is 01:26:14 Exactly, and they know that we're coming in and out. It's fine. One way to find out, I suppose. Put your new status to the test. Yeah, let's go. Okay, I start. So are we ready now? Any last minute things? I look out the window.
Starting point is 01:26:35 Do I see Thaddeus? Make a perception check. Okay. Oh man. That'd be the best. Look, you're too far. That'd be the best. Look, you're too far. It's a natural 20. I was going to say. I swear to god, it's a natural 20.
Starting point is 01:26:51 It's just a lumps of rock. It's that one. It's 24 total. Okay. That would be a D. As they're all having this conversation, getting ready, you just glance over your shoulder out the window and you see about a block and a half down the way,
Starting point is 01:27:07 something fly. Son of a bitch. Right before we poof. We have to step through. Son of a bi- Does he attack? Yeah. Yeah. What? As you all emerge.
Starting point is 01:27:33 The familiar subterranean basement of the Rexxentrum Archive of the Cobalt Soul. You can see there is an individual who is sitting there, currently writing in a small book, glances up and. Don't worry about it. Of?
Starting point is 01:27:52 Yeah. Pauzer bow. Right. Thanks. We weren't made aware of. I was going to send you a message ahead of time, but I need all my spells, you know? Certainly. As you need all my spells, you know? Certainly. It's all long past. Make your way up into the library proper.
Starting point is 01:28:12 Once again, the massive interior of this amazing library, since last you were here, meeting with Yudala Fon and a few other members, Krook, the day before. What would you like to do? I guess, on the, do I, nah. She said she'd contact me, or they'd be contacting me. It's fine, let's just keep going.
Starting point is 01:28:34 Okay, all right. So, like, what time is it, midday? No, right now it's early morning. You guys have plenty of time. Is there anything you want to do before tonight in Rexxentrum or otherwise? If you have means to teleport and such, like, you have ways to go.
Starting point is 01:28:50 So. I love that. I'm just saying, don't feel constrained to do it. Just going to dinner. You got all day! Just want to go straight in. I mean, you totally can. No, no, no, we should get some winter clothes
Starting point is 01:29:07 getting prepared so that it can be made while we're doing other things. Yeah. But sometimes it might take like a week to get a coat made or something. Was there any research? Did we already research the Nine Eyes and all that stuff that we were going to do?
Starting point is 01:29:22 Beauregard's delegating. That's right. Going to your dad, I think that would be we were going to do? Beauregard's delegated. That's right. Going to your dad, I think that would be a good thing to hook around in. Yeah, but not today. Not today. Tomorrow. But you're right, we could get some
Starting point is 01:29:37 clothing orders in now so that they'll be done hopefully by the end of the week, because it is going to be cold as a motherfucker up on top of the world. Do I have this map or is this just for reference? Was this given to us? That was given to you. By Drogna.
Starting point is 01:29:55 Actually, Drogna still has it, but showed it to you. Cool, never mind. So, and with your keen mind, you would have a very clear. Whoa. Yep, just like that. That's the sound it makes every time you use it. Should we research the city of Eor? Eor, Eor?
Starting point is 01:30:12 Eh. Flying city of Eor. You guys can research whatever you want to with the time you got. Because we're here. I'm fine with that. We're not in the library, mind's sake. I'm going to check with the monks, too,
Starting point is 01:30:25 to see if they actually have some winter garb that might be a little bit more official uniform. We call good. Yeah. So I'll actually double back inside. Okay. And yeah, talk to somebody and be like, outfit me. Okay. And yeah, talk to somebody and be like, outfit me. Okay. Some of the various archivists
Starting point is 01:30:51 or the keepers of the library take you to one of the outfitting chambers where they have a lot of their standard uniforms for different positions, as well as different weather and battle armaments and such. They don't have anything that is on its own prepared for the cold that you've been told to prepare for, but there are some Expositor Plus gear
Starting point is 01:31:16 that you can bring that is the beginnings of an outfit that is prepared for the weather you're going to be encountering. Heavy fur lining in some cases, thicker pants with multiple layers, heavy boots that are designed for harsher terrain, as well as to prevent moisture from soaking into the center. So you get some elements like that.
Starting point is 01:31:35 You still would probably need to supplement that with cloak, hood, and probably something for your arms if you really want to. Okay, I'll grab a pair of pants, kind of like baggy, almost look like gaucho pants that are fur-lined. Take my Expositor Belt that Dairon gave me that I haven't really adorned yet,
Starting point is 01:31:53 and officially tie it around my waist. It's a slate gray that fades very much in the style that my first belt went to, that fades to a royal cobalt blue. And then I grab a fur-lined vest off as well. Just throw that on, start there. Okay. Do they have any pins or anything? Like, Ioun pins or badges or something?
Starting point is 01:32:19 I don't know. I mean, there are different elements of iconography that you can use to adorn yourself if you like. You may have to refashion or fashion it. Like all-seeing eye brooch or something. Okay, you got it. Some TGIF flair. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:32:37 I hate Mondays. Yeah. Not a lot of flair in the library there, unfortunately. All right. And then I guess on the way out, I'll grab Caleb. Should we do some research? Want to hit the books?
Starting point is 01:32:53 You want to look into flying cities? I guess. I don't know what else to do with my time. Yeah, we have to still, I still need to go shopping, but this should- Well, how about you go shop, I'll pull some books. Feel free to come back whenever. You pull books and then I will come back and help you read. Great. Okay.
Starting point is 01:33:14 I start my thing. All right, what are you researching? Who's researching what while you're here? I'm going to talk to one of the scribes, one of the archivists, Aeor Farlan, wait. Todd McFarland. What was it? Fawrinn, yes.
Starting point is 01:33:33 That. And anything about potential weapons or magics or anything we might find. Aluak Sanctuary. In the Aluak Sanctuary? In the Aluak Sanctuary. Okay. Go ahead and roll an investigation check for me. Okay. I don't know, wait, I don't think that's right.
Starting point is 01:33:56 All right, don't fuck this up. Don't fuck this up. Okay, okay. 26. Ooh! Rolled a seven. Not bad. Okay. Fulrin is the name of the central most
Starting point is 01:34:14 and largest body of land in Eiselcross. Eiselcross is made up of numerous smaller sections of land, like islands, larger islands that cluster around its base there. numerous smaller sections of land, like islands, larger islands that cluster around its base there. Most of the area is above the treeline. There are some sporadic trees and such, but a lot of it's just open, snowy tundra,
Starting point is 01:34:35 blizzard-scarred landscapes and jagged mountains of gray and white stone. There's not a whole lot to the history there. There is no historical value to the location that is recorded, necessarily. It's too far north for people to go and want to live. So it seems like the first society that went that direction out of just general curiosity
Starting point is 01:35:06 and expedition attempts was through Uthodurn. Okay. And there was a village of Sorynia that was founded by them. But it was mainly just a fishing village that was trying to take up whatever resources were available on that northern side, not terribly far from where Uthodurn was,
Starting point is 01:35:22 just across the sea, comparatively. And you also learn that there were strange artifacts being brought back from those small outposts of Uthodurn that were being traded south. And this is over the past half a century or so. Oh. They were just strange little sections of relics
Starting point is 01:35:50 and things that some were non-functional, some held some power within them still, and that's what began to draw the curiosity and interest of the Empire. Then the Empire began to build their own outpost up there, known as Balanpost. That's Balanpost. Okay. You learn that the journey northward,
Starting point is 01:36:14 technically it's a shorter ship ride between Byseas Teal, which is the northernmost elven, primarily elven city of the Empire. However, the frozen depths of that ocean channel there is extremely dangerous to travel. So most people prefer to go the lengthier, but safer route from Palebank Village
Starting point is 01:36:35 to the south area of Fjoren. To confirm what you heard from Vess DeRogna, there are a number of regions on the island of Fórin, and a lot of cross, iso-cross, that just have strange flares and odd regions of wild magic, where magic of all kinds seems to be bent or twisted, and having effects that you weren't expecting.
Starting point is 01:37:05 Certain incantations could give you odd, unexpected results, and depending on the powers that are attempted to be evoked, can be extremely dangerous. And that's any magic user that was attempting to? Correct. Okay. With that roll, with that roll,
Starting point is 01:37:28 there's only a little bit of information that's coming directly from Eiselcross and the excavations currently to the Cobalt Soul because it is a very, very carefully guarded location. And for the most part, there is a, there's a lot of mistrust up north and there are a lot of mistrust up north and there are a lot of apparent, apparently a number of decades still of subtle skirmishes and elements of violence
Starting point is 01:37:52 and bloodshed between the Dynasty and the Empire in those regions before the war ever broke out. And most likely after the peace was even set recently, based around these excavations. Okay. And there is the central excavation, the biggest one, where it is believed where these relics came from. And many people surmise that at least a portion
Starting point is 01:38:13 of the ancient city of Aeor exists. And there are smaller sites throughout where smaller pieces may have fallen, where similar relics have been uncovered. Can I go talk to another one of the archivists or whatever? And I'm going to point at the artifacts that he's talking about, or that I'm reading about, and just ask if we have any here?
Starting point is 01:38:41 Holding onto? Unfortunately, we do not. Most of those have been put under the... They have been taken and are maintained by the subrace. That's what you were going to fucking say. Okay. All right. Okay.
Starting point is 01:39:02 As far as Aeor itself, with that roll, there isn't a lot of information. What you do know corresponds with some information you've already uncovered. It was a mageocracy. It was considered one of the most powerful, if not the most powerful, of the pre-calamity, arcane-centric societies. It was massive.
Starting point is 01:39:31 It was quite populated and was driven by the belief that mortality, the gift of magic to the mortal the belief that mortality, the gift of magic to the mortal was a gift as well as a challenge by the gods to eventually show that the creations can become the creator.
Starting point is 01:39:59 The idea that if a mortal can acquire this much power to destroy its own creator, that if a mortal can acquire this much power to destroy its own creator, then does that not make itself the gods as they are? And that belief varied throughout the populace there, but those in power firmly felt that there was there was a drive to, whether it be to save Exandria from the destruction of the coming Calamity
Starting point is 01:40:33 by eliminating the Pantheon entirely, or for personally selfish reasons, there's no specific record. Most of this is just hearsay from survivors of other parts of the region. It is believed that there were no survivors of the Fall of Aeor. There is no written or verbal record from inside the society,
Starting point is 01:40:54 all from those that remember it from an outside perspective. Pompeii style. If you will. People from Crait watching it go down. Yeah. Okay. All right. Pompeii style. If you will. People from Crait watching it go down. Yeah. Okay. All right.
Starting point is 01:41:15 Anything else? I relay all that info to him when he comes back. Okay. Put a pin in that. Mm-hmm. I want to return to that. While we're going shopping. Yeah, I want to do my clothes. Okay. All right, I'd say... I would have some idea of where to look for
Starting point is 01:41:36 sturdy fare, finer fare. Oh yeah, yeah. Fashionable, but also functional. I want fashionable. We want to look good first. Nobody, for the nobody that we're going to see. We want to look good first. Nobody, for the nobody that we're going to see, we want to look good. Yeah, if we're going
Starting point is 01:41:48 into the tundra, we want to look hot. Exquisite corpses. You want to be hot. Look, it's important, I respect that. All righty. We'll say within the vigil circle, you find a, for lack of a better term, the garment district of Rexxentrum.
Starting point is 01:42:11 There are a number of supplies and wholesalers and textile warehouses that sell fine materials, fabrics, silks, both crafted within the Empire and imported from beyond. And there are a number of very, very talented, for a price, of course, custom tailors that can be hired and commissioned for specific pieces. So what is it you're looking to have made?
Starting point is 01:42:36 I am looking to return to my Empire roots and I commission a long, thick, warm coat very much akin to the coat that everyone met me in. However, this one will not be moth-eaten and disgusting. So it will be brown and leather and long coat, fur-lined, I will get a very thick scarf, and I will also find a leather worker who can build me a new harness for my books. The
Starting point is 01:43:08 spell book is getting pretty fat and can no longer fit under my armpit. So the book on the left will still hang about here, but I describe a case or a harness that is more phone book sized that hangs off of my right hip. Right, almost like a side satchel. Yeah, but then I want them to have it hooked to my belt so that it's not flying all over the place when we are running for our dear lives. And then that will be counterbalanced by my old satchel,
Starting point is 01:43:40 which I will keep where I keep all my spell components and other odds and ends. All righty. Okay. I'd say have all those pieces commissioned. It'll take a few days to gather the materials and create the pieces, and it'll run you about 25 gold pieces for the entire outfit. Done.
Starting point is 01:44:00 Okay. Okay. Mm-hmm. I just drew it, so I'm going to just describe what I just came up with. I'm going to go and get, okay, I'm going to get a light blue tunic with long sleeves. I don't need super thick stuff
Starting point is 01:44:19 because I am resistant to the cold, so this is more for fashion. A tunic, I'm going to get some light so this is more for fashion. A tunic. I'm going to get some light gray thermal tights. And then I'm going to get some. Arc'teryx? Yep. You know, D&D tights.
Starting point is 01:44:36 250. Underarm. I'm going to get. She's resistant, so she'll only take half damage. I'm going to get some long knitted thigh highs that are knitted like Fair Isle. Anybody that knows the nitty-nitty knows what I'm talking about.
Starting point is 01:44:50 It's like stripes and stuff with designs knitted into them, you know? That are like flowers and bees. I want to get bees knitted into them. And I imagine this will cost a pretty penny because it is pretty specific. But it's going to be in a pale blue and white and light gray. And then I'm going to get an overcoat that is white,
Starting point is 01:45:23 and it's fur lined with a pale gray fur. So it's showing the trim, and I want it to be bell sleeves. And then it'll be fitted to about here, and then it's going to flare out, and it's going to have a little hood on it. Yeah, and that's pretty much it. As you finish.
Starting point is 01:45:43 Oh, and I'm going to get an earmuffs to match that. And some boots, you know, that are fur-lined boots, obviously to look good, that are going to match my coat and stuff. Matt is the store clerk. No, that's exactly what I was going to say. As you finish your statement, you look up and you see the middle-aged gentleman with his glasses,
Starting point is 01:46:01 his chin tuft of white goatee, his hair slicked back with his pencil sticking out through the back of his ear, just going, And how soon did you need this, lass? In like a week, is that doable? Give me just a second. Okay. He rushes off to the back room and you hear some voices like, SAM and LAURA, and MATT, and SAM, and MATT, and MATT.
Starting point is 01:46:26 SAM and LAURA, and MATT, and MATT. SAM and LAURA, and MATT. SAM and MATT. I think we should be able to take care of your request. Of course, this is quite a commission in a very tight period with very specific materials and with quite a number of custom knitted elements. Yeah, you'll have to have a very good knitter.
Starting point is 01:46:48 We can do this outfit for 120 gold pieces. Ooh, I'll give you 500 gold. And I would like if it had, could you add some embroidery along the coat edges as well? Of course. Wonderful. I would love some pink and blue flowers
Starting point is 01:47:13 and maybe some pale yellow bees embroidered on there as well with some beautiful green vines wrapping around everything. You know, like an emerald green? You know, something that really reminds you of the Tra- Something, you know, like just a pretty green. Right, I am following you, yes. Yes. All right, yes.
Starting point is 01:47:31 That will definitely be done. I think you'll be very happy with the results. Wonderful, thank you so much. Of course, of course. Half up front and then half upon the front. Of course, yeah! That's so, yes. So you mark off 250 now. Yes. And pay half upon the front. Of course, yeah. You can get that, so yes. So you can mark off 250 now. Yes.
Starting point is 01:47:47 And then pay 250 at the arrival. He went from completely exacerbated by the whole thing to extremely giddy and jubilant in a way that you didn't expect such an individual to exhibit. He just saved his business. Yeah. There's a tailor in the back screaming, nine women can't make a baby in a month. All right.
Starting point is 01:48:15 Who's next? Anyone else? Ladies. I would like to, do you have something? I'll come up with something, I'm sure. I would like a long-sleeve fur lolita dress. Ooh! It's a lolita coat and dress
Starting point is 01:48:33 with a bow knot in the middle in the belt line. And I looked this up before. I want it made out of pink fabric. Okay. And white fur trim on all of the trim places. Big buttons down the middle. This is fucking adorable. White hand muff.
Starting point is 01:48:52 And then I'd like earmuffs, too, but very special earmuffs. If you can craft them, you know, white fur earmuffs. But this piece, the headpiece or whatever, I saw this wonderful, lovely little redhead who had these cool antlers, and I'd like to imitate those and put those up on top of the earmuffs,
Starting point is 01:49:18 because they just looked so cool. So I'd like that. They can just be like little deer, little fawn something, you know, just little antlers. We can clean bloodstains out of them. Oh my goodness! The first tailor you speak to, a middle-aged gentleman with a bit of a great half
Starting point is 01:49:35 of the fur on his chin and slicked back to hair and glasses, goes, no, I'm sorry, I'm busy for the next week, and closes the door on it. But the next tailor you find can take the commission and puts a full cost materials all in, custom elements there, about 40 gold. Cool. Taking Jester's lead, I'll give you 42. Well, um, a very kind.
Starting point is 01:50:03 And some boots. 45. Great some boots. 45. Great, done. All right, see you in a week. All right. Off. Who's next? Bloop. You.
Starting point is 01:50:17 I'll go if no one else is going to go. So I'm going to find a tailor and probably a leathersith and an armor smith and kind of want to get my armor treated, get it oiled and treated for the cold. I leave a couple samples. I pull the pieces off the shield that are mostly decorative to kind of show how it's done. Leave a couple fabric swatches from what I'm already wearing, just like I'm going to leave some of my bits there for them to use for the new outfit.
Starting point is 01:50:49 I'm going to get a big lavender coat with white and crimson red stitching in it made. A wool hat. It's time for a new hat. Black oiled gloves and boots. Deep moss green pants, heavy cotton pants, and a jacket underneath to keep the armor off of me, just less than the shirt. Then worked into the cloak will be some of the dragonfly silk that I've brought from home. Then we'll have patterns along the edges of some of the traditional pattern work
Starting point is 01:51:39 of my original outfit that comes from home. Okay, cool. The nicest thing I've ever owned. No, and it's not a terribly hard commission. You're also providing some of the materials for it, which would be hard to find. That'll put you at about, we'll say 25 gold as well. I'll give him 20.
Starting point is 01:51:59 I'll throw 40 since we're all being. Okay, wow, you guys are... It's only money. You guys are making a reputation for yourselves here in the middle of this district of Rexxentrum. All right. Who else? Oh, you haven't gone yet, and you haven't gone yet. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:52:16 You want to go? Well, I do have a question. What's your question? Can I... So the coat of the crest, I was thinking of wearing the nobleman's coat. Yeah. Am I able to add anything to it?
Starting point is 01:52:32 Like changes, like change the look of it? Sure, yeah. Okay. So I will bring that coat and I would like to, everything's going to be black. And I would like sort of the sleeves to be those ones that kind of are a little wide, like make the sleeves a little wider.
Starting point is 01:53:00 So, you know, I could put my hands in between and have them cold. A sort of leather drapey hood added onto it with some fur inside. And then... What color fur? Black as well? I really wish I would have thought about this already. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 01:53:22 Yeah, black fur. And... No, let's go white. Okay. Let's black fur. And, no, let's go white. Okay. Let's go white. White fur. And then in the back of the coat, I want also black embroidery on top so you can barely see it. Like some lightning, some flowers,
Starting point is 01:53:41 maybe a little white embroidery flowers. Little accents here and there. Little accents here and there. Little accents here and there. And one of those round fur hats. But, so. Like the Russian ones? Yeah. Fuck yeah. Very cool, okay.
Starting point is 01:54:02 Hopefully I don't... Yeah, okay. Later,, okay. Hopefully I don't... Yeah, okay. Later, I'm going to be like, that's not what I wanted to wear. It'll be time to alter a bit. Really wish I would've checked my check. Not too complicated. I'll put you 18 gold for that.
Starting point is 01:54:16 Okay, so I will give 50 gold. Okay. Since everybody's... Wow, big spenders here, 99. A little generous group. Taylor's going to party tonight. Yeah. Yeah, they're going to tell tales
Starting point is 01:54:34 of this phantom group that came through out of nowhere one day and just helped them make it through the winter. Fjord, anything specific? Do you have any coats? Yeah, there are a number of coats. What sort of coat are you looking for? A warm one.
Starting point is 01:54:51 We have a few warm ones, yes. I'll take one. All right, that'll be five gold. You got it. All right, here you go. It's going to be like the time I went to Colorado and you're just going to be cold everywhere you did and the jacket's not covering. We're set, Let's rock.
Starting point is 01:55:08 I hug back to the tailors that I went to and open the door. Excuse me. Already in there, he's running around giving out orders and giving out slips to different members of the troop to start grabbing materials. Oh, yes, yes. Can you make me some mittens that match my socks, please?
Starting point is 01:55:26 Yes, do not worry, no additional charge. We'll take care of it for you. You're welcome. Please make them pretty. Thank you. All right, thank you. Someone knock the door. All right. As you are finishing your research, by the way, you do close a toe and sit there,
Starting point is 01:55:45 taking in a bit of the information, some of it familiar, some of it new. A little frustrated, there's just a general lack of detailed information within the central archive of Rexxentrum on Aeor. You feel a presence come up and there you turn and you see Yudala Fon approaching with two of the regular archivists.
Starting point is 01:56:07 As they approach and stand there over you, Hello, Beauregard. Do not mean to disturb you. No, I mean, it's a little unnerving when I'm sitting and all three of you are standing. I stand. Very well. We've done quite an extensive sweep of the archives we have here,
Starting point is 01:56:30 as well as put out some feelers in other connected archives, searching for this Eyes of Nine you had spoke of. Nothing. Is there any other details you could perhaps provide? Could another name or... Perhaps confirm with your sources what this may have been, but we do not have anything.
Starting point is 01:57:10 And you watch as they put their hand out and, you know, gesturing to the thousands and thousands and thousands of homes. Yeah, no, I see, I know, I see the books. I've been here. Yeah, I get it. I get the scope. What? Okay. See the books, I've been here. Yeah, I get it, I get the scope. Is it blind?
Starting point is 01:57:25 Yeah. Okay. Can I get back to you? Let me think on this for a minute. Of course. Okay. And they turn around and make their way into the rest of the library.
Starting point is 01:57:39 Just fucking irritating, just toss a book that I have. Yudela stops. Huh? Are you lying? You're lying? I'm lying? Oh, I mean, insight check as they walk away. Roll an insight check. It seemed like they were lying. Roll an insight check.
Starting point is 01:57:57 Hoo, hoo. Oh, pooper. That's not good. 15. 15. 15. Eudala seems pretty straightforward. The times that you have encountered and what you've heard,
Starting point is 01:58:12 Eudala is one of the paragons of the Archives. They seem trustworthy. Hmm. Okay, I just, like, it seems hard to believe, but okay. Yeah. Okay. Anything else anyone needs to accomplish
Starting point is 01:58:38 in your shopping day here in Rexxentrum? No, but when I return to Beauregard, you know, I meant to read with you. I got a little caught up in errands. Yeah, don't worry about it. I'm feeling a little anxious, a little too anxious, if you can believe it, to do any heavy reading today, actually, that is surprising.
Starting point is 01:59:06 I was being sarcastic, but that is a little surprising. But let's go get lunch. I could listen to you. Yeah, I'll fill you in. So tell me about it. I just rip a page out of my notebook in anger. Okay. You need beer and a pretzel, come on. Okay. All right, so you pretzel, come on. Okay.
Starting point is 01:59:25 All right, so you guys go ahead and find the- Find a place, sit at an outside table, and then if she's willing to share, pump her mind for all the information she got and totally nerd out over it. You got it. Rather than trying to focus on a book, which I would have a hard time doing right now.
Starting point is 01:59:41 Okay. All right. Anything else? I tell him everything. And then also in filament about, Udalla came back and they said that they couldn't find anything about the Eyes of Mine. Fucking anything. They were like, oh, do you like,
Starting point is 01:59:59 can you check with your sources and maybe find, and I'm like, bitch, I'm the source. I didn't say that, but I did think it in my head. That thing you think as you walk down the stairs, yeah? Yeah. Well, maybe, maybe it was just smoke and not fire.
Starting point is 02:00:22 Maybe it was, maybe we're seeing meaning where there is none. Or maybe it is the key to everything, I don't know. Think about it. Keep your ears open. Just need more answers. We can come back later in the week, yeah? Mm-hmm. Keep thinking. Okay.
Starting point is 02:00:45 All right. Any other business during the day? All right, I'll take that as a sign that as the sun begins to set across the Zemnian sky, you all gather, wearing what attire? We brought our fancies.? We brought our fancies. So you're going full formal on this, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 02:01:08 All the fancies that we wore to... The ball. The ball, the... Oh, that's right, that velvet dress. Yeah, but a little bit of armor still. Yeah, I keep on my bracers and I bring my staff. Okay. All right. Gathering and making your way to the familiar shimmer ward of Rexxentrum
Starting point is 02:01:27 as the darkened sky takes the horizon from the sunlight, and you can see from the breaks in the cloud cover, bits of starlight peeking through, you eventually make your way to a familiar place to you. You come to the second southernmost tower of the candles on the southern eastern side of the Shimmer Ward. And you stand now before the dark iron gate that is dwarfed by the multi-spired structure
Starting point is 02:02:00 of brass and ruddy brick that rises like a twisting monolithic tree from a courtyard dense with oaks. This is the estate grounds known as the Ambition's Call. And the gates open for you as you stand there. That's where we're going to take a break. Ambition's Call? Ambition's Call. Good name.
Starting point is 02:02:25 Number four, Pivot Drive. It's a tower? Lord of the Rings, bruh. One of the oak trees? Correct, there's a courtyard of oak trees. On the corner of this, on the opposite end, there is an entrance that leads to where Astrid was staying, where you went and visited last time you were here in Rexxentrum.
Starting point is 02:02:46 But yes. Dinner. Indeed. We're going to take a little break here. We'll be back here shortly to pick up wherever this goes. So we'll see you here in a few minutes. We interrupt this Critical Role Podcast Network broadcast to bring you news of dangerous treasures
Starting point is 02:03:04 that lie sealed within the Critical Role Podcast Network broadcast to bring you news of dangerous treasures that lie sealed within the Critical Role shops. Only the heartiest of adventurers should dare seek them out. In all seriousness, though, I'm Matthew Mercer, and we've made some very cool things that we really like and hope you will, too. If you'd like to support the show,
Starting point is 02:03:17 please consider visiting any of our Critical Role online shops through the Shop tab at critrole.com and see if anything catches your eye. Okay, back to the show. Welcome back. So, the gates just open before you
Starting point is 02:03:36 to the courtyard leading to the tower. As you walk through, it's a beautiful, if slightly ominous, patch of forest surrounding this tower. You can see faint fire bugs glowing and fading in and out in the distance, but just far enough out of reach as you walk this paved path that leads through.
Starting point is 02:04:00 Eventually, you find yourself to the base of the tower, where this massive set of arched double doors that wait for you open into a low-lit antechamber. As you walk into the tower chamber proper, you are met with a patterned carpet of dark brown and red that meets wall to wall. No furniture, just an open entry. You can see a beautiful crystal chandelier
Starting point is 02:04:33 that hangs above you in the center of the partially domed ceiling. You can see intricately carved wooden panels wrap around the doorless walls, aside from the entryway, housing large paintings set within elaborate frames. You can see one large landscape that shows an odd sunrise, it seems, over a desolate plain of rock and flame, a sky of burning clouds and haze.
Starting point is 02:04:59 Anyone here is training Arcana, if you'd like to roll. 15. 15? That's enough to know this is most likely a portrait of the Plane of Fire. You do also see what looks to be a bloodied battlefield, a very elaborate, extensive, wide 12-foot portrait that is almost curved in the way it's set against the curved interior
Starting point is 02:05:25 of this chamber, where you see soldiers of two sides just clashing and tangling in this display of violence. If anyone here has history they're proficient with, they can go ahead and roll for that. 31. Whoa! Damn! Jeez Louise. This is a depiction of the Marrow War,
Starting point is 02:05:52 which was the battle, the Marrow War, where the Dwendalian Empire clashed with the Jeweless Dominion, defeated, and then took over the entirety of this area of western Reindeer, this great valley here. Well done. And then you come across what looks to be a portrait
Starting point is 02:06:13 of a young man in a forest green, gold-trimmed robe on display. You see his long, dark hair comes to a widow's peak to the front of his face, right over his gray-blue eyes. You take a moment to recognize, but this image does appear to be of a young Trent Ikithon. Not but a moment later, do you make this beat of recognition, then you swear you see the man
Starting point is 02:06:38 in the painting give you a subtle nod. Can I use See Invisibility for the next hour? Just because, fuck it, why not? Sure. You put it on. Right as the doors close behind you, you're now enclosed in this chamber. There are no stairs.
Starting point is 02:06:58 There's no other exit door. Can I look towards the bottoms or anything of the paintings? I want to see if they have any signatures on them of painters that I would recognize, some of them that I studied. Make a perception check. Guidance.
Starting point is 02:07:16 Hmm. Cool. Nine. Nine. Nine? They're very detailed. It's hard to pick out where a signature would be if there is one, if it's hidden, if it's folded within the actual gold framing,
Starting point is 02:07:37 or you're just not picking up on it, but nothing jumps out to you, unfortunately. As I get back to the Trent painting, I'm going to touch his face. Okay. You can feel the texture of canvas beneath your finger. Not but a handful of moments since the front door's closed, and at this moment, the rest of you feel this shift
Starting point is 02:08:00 and you look at the carpet in the center of the room and there is a forceful glow from underneath in places. And you see this faint pattern of various glyphs that are gently muted by the presence of the carpet over whatever the source is light up in a circular pattern around the interior of the chamber. You then watch as the paintings begin to drift downward.
Starting point is 02:08:34 Dope. Is this the room? Yeah. It's not stretching. Damn, that was already the plan. My imagination. But it begins to rise rapidly. You watch as a door goes.
Starting point is 02:08:46 Another door goes. Floor after floor goes by. Four, five floors, you lose count as they go. It quickly drifts to a stop to the point where you all find your feet lift off the ground for just a second and you find yourself clambering just to make sure you don't tumble over when the floor comes to a stop. So it felt like we were going down?
Starting point is 02:09:09 Felt like you were going upward. So wouldn't we have... No. You stop? You go, mm-hmm. You have a little. You go up. When you're going down, you go. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 02:09:21 Physics. It's been a while since we've been in an elevator. Been anywhere. Yeah, yeah, it's true. It's been a while since we've been in an elevator. Been anywhere. Yeah, yeah, it's true. It's very true. That's right, you jump at the top. How does it go up and down? Oh yeah, I know what we're doing.
Starting point is 02:09:32 Yeah, okay, cool, then I jump at the top. Okay, you get a good extra foot, foot and a half of leave distance in the air. You can almost touch the bottom of the chandelier. The chandelier that does not shake or move with the momentum of the chamber. Ooh. Cool.andelier that does not shake or move with the momentum of the chamber. Ooh. Cool. As it stops and lands,
Starting point is 02:09:48 you look around you. You've seen no windows at all in your progression, but you do see... No windows. And no door. There is actually a door in this chamber. No. You see what looks to be almost like a birch wood door
Starting point is 02:10:02 on the opposite side of the room from where the entranceway would have been at the bottom of the tower. Do you think this happened because I touched his face? Do you think it took us to him? What if I would have touched the fire plane picture or something? We would have gone somewhere else. We would have gone down.
Starting point is 02:10:15 You go down to hell. Wow. Glad I touched him then. Yeah, always touch him. The birch virtual door opens, and you can see a little bit of flickering light on the inside of the chamber beyond. You haven't seen any spheres in the air or anything?
Starting point is 02:10:34 In this room, no. As you approach. I approach to walk in. Wait, wait, Caleb! I stop in the door. Wait, shouldn't we have had a code word or something? Let's discuss it now while we're in earshot. How about, oh no, it's a trap? Okay, that sounds good.
Starting point is 02:10:56 Okay. The code word is Yahtzee. Pick a non-copyright. I don't know. Peanuts or something? Old Bane. It's the Theater Union. I-A-T-S-E.
Starting point is 02:11:16 Yahtzee. Yahtzee. That's also problematic. Damn it, Liam, team steps. Don't play with the team steps. Okay. You can hear very, very gentle, it's almost like violin and harpsichord music
Starting point is 02:11:38 playing from inside the next room. As you begin to approach, you peek beyond the threshold and you can see, giving off a very faint aura, what looks to be six different humanoid-ish figures that stand at the ready against two walls of what is a long hall-like room. As you step through the door, they all disappear and you feel the enchantment
Starting point is 02:12:07 that your weapon had given to you fade. Uh-uh. As you all step through, you can see now there are a number of smaller, more metallic iron chandeliers, about four of them, that align the ceiling of this long hall-like room, where you can see a long table sits before you
Starting point is 02:12:33 with these pale, tan, almost beige-colored tablecloths and settings and chairs for seven guests. There are windows in this room, and they appear to be somewhat frosted, but you can see beyond them what looks to be like a beautiful forest. Dense in trees, a bit of moonlight coming through the branches.
Starting point is 02:13:03 Doesn't quite match with the math of where you are with the center of the city. And beyond the end of this table, you can see there is a roaring fireplace on the opposite side of the room. And there framed in the flickering flames, you can see three figures standing as they all turn.
Starting point is 02:13:25 You can see three figures standing as they all turn. You can see the figure familiar to you all first is the wide-shouldered, short, dark hair, well-buttoned velvet tunic on what seems to be a dwarf who had met you once at the Vergesen Sanatorium when you were inspecting the beacon a number of weeks back. On the right side, you can see a woman with dirty blonde hair, short in the back,
Starting point is 02:14:01 combed over to one side of the face, smiling in a back, combed over to one side of the face, smiling in a very, very officious-looking suit, it seems, that comes into a long dress at the bottom. And then in the center, you see a, not quite the same, but mirrored essence of that same green and gold robe
Starting point is 02:14:31 that you saw in the portrait below. You see the older, jaundiced figure of Master Trent Ikithon, who smiles, puts his arms up. I am so very happy that you have accepted my invitation. Please sit. I believe we have much to talk about.
Starting point is 02:15:03 Question, you said there were only place settings for seven people? For the seven of you at the table. As well as the three of them. As well as the three for them. Do we have assigned seating? There does not appear to be any sort of indication of assigned seating.
Starting point is 02:15:21 Are you going to take the head of the table? Yeah. Okay, Jester takes the opposite head of the table, of which Trent takes the furthest side. The corners of the room where there were those six humanoid figures, nothing there, right? Correct. Empty. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:15:36 Okay. I'll wait until Astrid sits and then sit in the chair adjacent. So that would be at the opposite head of the table, Trent, to the left of Trent is Astrid, and then it would be you. Yeah. Okay. I'm going to sit across from you, wherever you sit.
Starting point is 02:15:56 Definitely sit. Somebody should sit next to them so that Eowulf gets separated. Ooh, that's a good idea. I use my speed to try to sit where Eowulf would be seated. He is moving for the chair to the right of Trent Ikithon.
Starting point is 02:16:18 Yeah, come on, roll for that shit. Do it. Yahtzee. Roll a dexterity. Roll a dexterity check, because this is- I don't even have my dice up. Yatzee. Roll a dexterity check. Roll a dexterity check, because this is- I don't even have my dice out. It's like you're, he's just pulling out the seed for a lady. I knew you had your dice out.
Starting point is 02:16:32 We're going to die any second. What is my checking? Just roll a d20, add your dexterity modifier. 17. 17. He watches as he goes and pulls the chair out and is about to lean in and Is this seat taken? Apparently it is.
Starting point is 02:16:56 Like shoves you into the table a little bit. Pulls the chair right next to you back, then sits down. I'll sit down. Hmm? I'll sit down. In the chair right next to you back and then sits down. I'll sit down. In the chair that he pulls back. He has a power move. Thank you very much. Yes!
Starting point is 02:17:15 Of course. Kind of gently pushes it in. Looks back to you again. Goes to the third chair. Caleb is watching a mixture of mortification and hilarity, but not smiling, just... Eowulf, what did you like to sit down next to me? I walk to the chair.
Starting point is 02:17:38 You walk to the chair. I pull it out. For you. Oh. Think. Pull it out. For you. Oh! Think. Pull it out. Just wanted to make note. Ah!
Starting point is 02:17:56 Run! I sit across from Caduceus. Yeah, so we have eyes on either side of the... Good call. Yeah. As everyone takes their seat and finishes, Trent, who's leaning back in this high-backed chair, that comes up to these almost hook-like hands that are currently reaching over the top of the back,
Starting point is 02:18:19 puts his arms up and gives a clap. You feel this wind rush through the chamber, and you feel this wind rush through the chamber, and the doors you came through close. The meal will be here arriving shortly, in the interim. I am happy to have you as guests in my home.
Starting point is 02:18:41 I can't hear you. Can you speak a little louder? Sorry, I'm just so far down here. He then begins to introduce. My companions, and as he speaks, his mouth does not move any longer. Instead, the language seems to be coming from all sides, directly into your mind. It's cool. It's cool.
Starting point is 02:19:06 Oh no. As he just stares intently across the table. My companions for the night, of which you are familiar. Childhood friends of your companion, this Caleb Wittogast, or as we've known him, Bren. This is Astrid.
Starting point is 02:19:34 Points to her. And this is Eddolf. And he gives a nod. Now I must say, I'm quite impressed how you all come together and done so much in such a short time. What is, if I might inquire, the driving force behind your travels?
Starting point is 02:19:58 What is your mutual goal? Boy, that is... That's a tricky one to start with. We are driven by many forces, but mostly justice. Right? Yeah. Right? Mostly justice.
Starting point is 02:20:21 I think mostly we are just trying to leave the world better than when we found it. Hmm. So we are not too different, then. Oh, you seek to change the world for the better? Well, what is the purpose of power if not to use it properly? Much for us to celebrate.
Starting point is 02:20:44 Together at this time. Indeed. it properly. Much for us to celebrate. Together at this time. Indeed. We've achieved peace after so much struggle. So. There's this pregnant pause at the table as he begins to scan across each one of you. I'm doing the same. Can I ask what kind of vibe I'm getting from Astrid and Aethel?
Starting point is 02:21:15 Well, I was about to say, as soon as you're doing this, Astrid pipes up and goes, Indeed, it is a pleasure to meet all of these friends of Caleb. Just as it is good to see you as well, my friend. And I am happy to get the chance to know those who have kept him companions and safe in the time that we could not.
Starting point is 02:21:45 Right, Aethuald? Indeed, I have seen some of you at the sanatorium. Seems fate continues to draw us together. Perhaps the Matron has plans for us together yet, huh? Who's the Matron? Yeah, which one is he referring to? Has plans for us together yet, huh? Who's the matron? Yeah, which one is he referring from? The matron of Ravens? And you, what are you?
Starting point is 02:22:17 You see Eddwolf kind of gives a weird half grin. Vegetarian, so I hope the meal reflects that. Yes! Nice. The smile fades. Well, I guess before I get too deep into my particular interests for the night, what questions have you for me? Well, I am curious now that we have
Starting point is 02:22:59 reached some quiet between the two nations, seeing as how central you are to the decision-making here in the Empire, what's the next step? Well, I do apologize. You have not been around for the full scope of our political engine, but I do not make decisions. as you have not been around for the full scope of our political engine, but I do not make decisions. I merely guide, offer suggestions.
Starting point is 02:23:37 As to what is next, well, there are many paths. Am I to know, it seems you're fallen in with a Vesterogna, yes? We will be spending some time with her, that is correct. And what errands, if I might inquire, has she procured your skills for?
Starting point is 02:24:09 You might not inquire. Respectfully, I feel that that information would be considered of private nature. Of course, of course. Does he feel like, does he already know? Does he already know he just wants to hear from us? Make an insight check. I was going to say, my insight check is just not stopping. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:24:41 17. 22. 22? There isn't a lack of confidence in his inquiry, and he does not appear to be finished. As he goes, Is she looking to perhaps drag you to Shattengrot as glorified Tomb Raider, sir? No. Is Shattengrot as glorified Tomb Raider as her? No? Perhaps your familiarity with Shohasian society
Starting point is 02:25:14 is to aid her in acquisitions there. Or is she hoping to bring you to someplace colder? Well, that is a conversation you should have with her. I know. As far as I know, she just wants us to hang out for intimate reasons, you know? We're all very attractive. Fair. Make a deception check. I feel like she should get advantage
Starting point is 02:25:54 for the fact that we are very attractive. Sorry. 15. Okay. Well, wherever it is that you all intend to travel, I hope you do so safely and without tissue. Without any tissue? Yeah, we won't need any. We're not sick or anything. A joke, yes.
Starting point is 02:26:26 The doors enter and you watch as these platters begin to just hover in the faint breeze, held aloft on their own, filling up the table before you. That's cool. As you, Eddwolf takes a scarf and tucks it in to the top of his shirt, and Astrid puts it in her lap, Trent leans in.
Starting point is 02:27:06 No questions, then? So many questions. How's the new crock? How are your children? Oh, the children are... doing well. Some more than others. Not everyone has the stomach for it. Hmm.
Starting point is 02:27:32 We lost a talented prospect not long ago. How did you lose them? They were captured in Rosohna. Oh. Blondie. That's unfortunate. Not Blondie. No, in the prison.
Starting point is 02:27:57 The prison. Yeah. What's her butt? Well, the Empire will always yield up more youth. I find hope in the quiet that was achieved at sea. Maybe I'm naive.
Starting point is 02:28:23 I'm sure you think so. How wonderful it would be achieved at sea. Maybe I'm naive, I'm sure you think so. How wonderful it would be if the two sides could approach each other with that forthrightness, always. You said that you make no decisions, you only advise a thought experiment. Mm-hmm. Pretend that I am King Dwendal.
Starting point is 02:28:49 Very well. In this moment, advise me. To? As the king? In your opinion, do we keep this momentum going, or use it as a feint and dig in harder in all the traditional ways? What is your advice? Our great King Dwendal is to use this momentum to rally the populace
Starting point is 02:29:33 around the idea of your benevolence and your ability to keep them safe from outside aggression. But to keep a very close eye in all the shaded places. There are so many lives and only so much land. How does he do that? Yeah, really.
Starting point is 02:30:09 That was literally both answers at the same time. He just said yes twice. That was amazing. Wow. I look diagonally down at Eadwulf. Like a little more perspective, Wulf. How are things going? Well, at the moment, it is not as busy, so I am enjoying a little more of a relaxed schedule.
Starting point is 02:30:55 You look good. Vagen? You look good. Oh. Well. It's a wonder what travel will do, and sun on your back. When the war was a bit hotter than it is now, were you very busy?
Starting point is 02:31:19 You, Aedwulf? Not any busier than you were, apparently. Well, yes, but were you on the front lines? I'm not a front line sort of fighter. I have different skills, more of a scout, if you will. Did you go into enemy lines and go on missions and things, exciting things? Exciting things. Yeah? Like what?
Starting point is 02:31:52 Yeah, I'm curious, like Veth, I missed a year or two. What have you both been filling your time with? He looks over towards Astrid, and Astrid narrows her eyes a bit and pulls her back and he smiles. We're doing what we do best, Bren. Ensure history walks the right path. Have you been taking up hairstyling? Because Astrid's got a pretty cool one.
Starting point is 02:32:29 Was it Eadwulf that did that for you? You're saying it's to Astrid? Uh-huh. Astrid goes, Mm. No, this is my own design. Oh, you did that yourself? She takes and pours a little bit of my own design. Oh, you did that yourself? She takes and pours a little bit of wine.
Starting point is 02:32:46 Wow. Why do you not like it? No, I love it. I love it. Don't you like your hair like it as well? That's okay. It's so original, I wouldn't want to steal your thunder. You might have chosen the wrong profession.
Starting point is 02:33:05 That's my profession that allows me to do this. And you watch as she flicks her finger and the hair suddenly grows long and curls up into this extremely bouncing, healthy shoulder bob. And then it recoils upward into this. Careful, you got some Bernays in a lock right there. He got a little out of control with that. The world card was used by the barber.
Starting point is 02:33:26 It got a little on your lapel. I don't have it. That's really cool. That's a really cool spell. That's a really cool spell. Thank you. Selection of fine talent. She looks back to Vren.
Starting point is 02:33:44 Do you ever teach people how to do those kind of spells? Because I would love to know how to do that spell. Well, no. These are the things that are taught after years of training at the Soul Trees Academy. Is it so you can change your looks? Mm-hmm. Because there's easy disguise self spells, you know?
Starting point is 02:34:04 Those are easy. Yeah. But like. Then, you know? Those are, like, easy. Yeah. But, like... Then you know all about this sort of magic, then. Oh. Oh. I guess I could just change my hair on a whim, huh? But that looked like you were really changing your hair.
Starting point is 02:34:21 Were you really changing your hair? Glamorous. Wow. Caleb, I want to learn about glamour. Really changing your hair? Were you really changing your hair? Glamorous. Wow. Caleb, I want to learn about glamour. That's why her tits look so amazing. We are such assholes. Okay.
Starting point is 02:34:41 Yeah, Caleb's working real hard to keep a blush down through all of this. Astrid leans forward and goes, So Bren, we miss you. We're glad to see that you're safe and doing so well. I have good friends.
Starting point is 02:35:07 They're good people. Are you trying to invite him back? Is that why we're here? Are you asking him back into the fold? Oh, I'm not doing that, no. Trent leans forward and Nissim goes, I more just wanted to express my pleasure with Ren's, well,
Starting point is 02:35:39 Caleb's advancement as the prodigy I always knew he was. While some students take direct tutelage and study, some are unique in how they best develop through self-discovery, others inspired through hardship. Historically, the most talented mages have indeed walked this path,
Starting point is 02:36:09 for the greatest ambitions come from those who have endured the dark and crawled their way back. So you're apologizing, then? No, it sounds like he's trying to take fucking credit. Yeah, it didn't sound like an apology to me. Of my handful of vigilant reaches, I've had a fondness for you three. Any gestures towards the three students?
Starting point is 02:36:45 They're all finasteride are skilled in so much, and everything one could seemingly want in disciples and associates. But, and I mean this with all due respect to the both of them, their potential is limited. And like you, Bren, you have the eventual makings of an Assemblymember yourself. And don't think my eyes are the only ones
Starting point is 02:37:19 upon you for this reason. Some out of curiosity, others a threat. Forgive me, Bren. I could see your gifts and your faults and limitations. To truly grow, you needed to be broken and left to build yourself. It took longer than we anticipated, but when you were ready, we turned on the light
Starting point is 02:38:00 and showed you the door. He takes something from the side of his setting and drifts over across the table in your direction and lands at the front of your plate. You see a familiar symbol, that of the Archheart. This is why I am not dead. Of course. If he wanted you dead, there would have been no escape.
Starting point is 02:38:57 And I cannot tell you how proud of you I am. We are. And I know you hate me, Bren. Hate what I've put you through. I accept those feelings. For it was a hard choice for me to make. What I did, though, I did out of love. To what end?
Starting point is 02:39:34 To use me? No, to show you what you are capable of. It was your parents' wish, and I told them of the spark that I saw within you. They asked me to do whatever it took to help you realize it, for the glory of your family and for the Empire. I did just that as much as it hurt to hurt you. It is the greater man who puts the needs of others over himself, Wren.
Starting point is 02:40:15 And this nation needs you. Insight check. We need you. Insight check. I got an insight check. Lie. I flix to Aspen's. Insight check. Okay, insight check. Lie! I flicks to Astrid's. Natural fucking 20! Ooh!
Starting point is 02:40:32 Yes. I'll text you real fast. Oh. I would like to insight check Astrid. Go for it. See if she's going or not. Well, not a natural 20, but 25. 25, okay.
Starting point is 02:40:50 What's your total with the natural 20, Jester? 25. Damn, just look at that, two 25s. Wow, wow. We might actually learn something. Give me just a second. Takes longer to text than it does to whisper. This inside check brought to you by.
Starting point is 02:41:09 This text brought to you by Dwarven Forge. Makers of the world's finest modular gaming terrain. Oh, the curses of COVID distance. I missed the whispers, it was so much easier. 2020's hard, man. I know. It's really hard to stay quiet during this speech. Matt, you know, it would be easier and faster if you just did it with Ciri, with just like...
Starting point is 02:41:36 You're right! Oh, oh, oh. And I will tell this to you out loud, because this is less tricksy. With a 25, you can, she's looking towards you with a feeling of internal conflict that you weren't expecting.
Starting point is 02:42:04 You can see there is a softness and a yearning, internal conflict that you weren't expecting. You can see there is a softness and a yearning, but her body language is leaning away from him. From Trent? From Trent. And you see a glimmer in there of the Astrid you once knew. Ever so faintly worried. Worried?
Starting point is 02:42:39 About your response. Is Eadwulf just chowing down on his steak? I mean, no, he's mid-chew. He's like... Okay. He's intently watching, and he's just like, You will have to walk me through the logic of this
Starting point is 02:43:05 long con. Because I do loathe you. Deeply. Of course. But you do nothing flagrantly. Everything is very careful. Indeed.
Starting point is 02:43:30 So how would you hope to use me as a tool? This isn't to use you as a tool, Wrynn. And there isn't a word I could say that would find your ears with belief. Correct? Say that one more time. Because of the social distance. Yeah. There is no phrase or words I could say that you would find yourself able to believe.
Starting point is 02:44:20 It's hard to forget the past. Then do not forget it. Use it. If I am to be the focus of your hatred, I accepted that long ago. But what you are now, what you've accomplished, those you've drawn around you, and where you go, that is because of what you've endured. Not because of a book you read in some hall with other sniveling, rich children.
Starting point is 02:45:06 You made yourself. Not myself, not them. But it took that path of pain to accomplish what this is. And you're not the only one of us in the Assembly to have been through similar trauma and been defined by it. I
Starting point is 02:45:49 dead-eye stare Astrid while talking to Trent and say, and you think that my mother and father are mothers and fathers and children, should serve as grist for the mill in this way.
Starting point is 02:46:23 Whatever it takes to keep the people of this empire safe. Whatever it takes to keep the people of this empire safe. The wants of one do not outweigh the wants of the many. Right? Right. Edwulf leans forward and goes, A Peruin's made a sacrifice, yes. Like any soldier does in the Battle of Hewlett. If we cannot protect our own, then all of it is a failure.
Starting point is 02:47:32 Why did we get into this? Why did we serve with such vigor? If not to protect. You see, when talent rises from nothing, then nothing truly is lost. You are far more than where you came from.
Starting point is 02:48:29 So you've sent me off like a wind-up clockwork toy to serve the Empire. Am I right? What if the thing to do now is to supplant you, to pull you up like a weed and do better? You comfortable with that idea? Nothing would make me prouder.
Starting point is 02:49:02 He's like, yeah. He means it, doesn't he? Fuck, I know he means it. I'm not even going to ask him. Natural one. Probably means it. Got broccoli right here. At this point, Jester dribbles down our chin a little bit.
Starting point is 02:49:18 Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I'm just, this food looks really good. Really wish Beau would take a bite. He seems pretty honest from what you can tell. Beau! Beau! Yeah? Eat something already!
Starting point is 02:49:33 I don't have a fucking appetite, this shit is disgusting. Let's take it further. I look at Eadwulf and then at Astrid. And he is out of the picture. And you and you and I carry the torch forward. We will mangle more children. To feed the fields of wine and deer.
Starting point is 02:50:14 The Eddwolf, with its back, crosses his arms, looks to Astrid. Astrid looks to you and says, Well, if you were to be the bannerman of this tower that we are charged to, then we do as you say. If you want to bring more into this fold, we will.
Starting point is 02:50:48 If you want it to end, that's your command. What about you, Beau? What about me? When we spoke last, I had the impression that you were being groomed for this seat. She looks nervously over towards Trent, and Trent leans in a little bit. My ambitions
Starting point is 02:51:25 and the paths laid before me are not always congruent. Bren. And she looks deadly serious towards you with a look of stop. Trent leans forward with this grin getting slowly more and more curled and confident. Any man of my position assumes that everyone I keep close
Starting point is 02:52:14 is just waiting for me to turn my back. Every person in power knows that feeling, lives by it. It's the rare one that gets to choose. I just hope you don't disappoint me, Bren. That is a lot to absorb. It has been an interesting decade, to be sure. I often feel like a failure and a success within the same hour. Then you are learning.
Starting point is 02:53:11 I have dreamed of murdering you with my bare hands many nights. So I hope it's not just flowery language you're throwing around the dinner table, Master Ikithon. This place, this country could do better. It could do it with a little less blood. Everyone at this table knows that struggle
Starting point is 02:53:52 is inherent to life. But this way is not the only way. That was given to Astrid. She looks at Trent. Then... take care of yourself. All of you. For the struggle never stops. And because you don't want bloodshed
Starting point is 02:54:40 doesn't mean every other person that wants what you have doesn't. History and mortal nature prove this time and time again. If you are not sometimes the first to cut, you are the first to receive the blade. I've spent my life bearing knives. Let's hope you live as long, Caleb Wintergast. Take a bite of my steak.
Starting point is 02:55:39 Is it poison? It's very well prepared. Jester. Does that appear to be poison? It might be the best take I've ever had in my life. It's so fucking good. It's like it's melting in my mouth. Yeah, yeah, yeah, just eat as much as you can real fast.
Starting point is 02:56:01 Before he kicks us out. Get kicked out, yeah. I feel like I have been domineering the conversation. What? No! No! Not at all. It's been great. Does anyone else
Starting point is 02:56:17 have any questions about me being groomed as the Antichrist? How many more beacons do you have? Hell yeah. There you go. What do you mean, you've only seen the one? That is what we have. Insight check. Yeah. Go for it.
Starting point is 02:56:41 Natural 20. Natural 20. Whoa! Whoa! What? Bringing you to a total of? 40, that's 40! Well, 29 on my end. 30. Really?
Starting point is 02:56:56 59. Well, combined. Yeah, they stack, they stack. That's how it works. Yeah, you combine them now. How many are are, the addresses in which they're located. His eyes dart to the left.
Starting point is 02:57:09 It's due south, go! Since you're both here. It's right under the table. Yes, yes! He's being completely honest. He's always honest. It's the best lie there's to honest. What's the most incredible thing
Starting point is 02:57:26 you learned from studying them? We don't know yet. Yet? Have you ever answered a question directly? One question at a time. I knew it. That's great. It's like a party game, really. We have learned some things,
Starting point is 02:57:54 but there is still much more to glean. We have only just begun our research. So who's to say what the most important thing is? What I do know is there is much potential to help a lot of good people. You mentioned being a Tomb Raider in Shadden Groud. Is that a mission you've sent people on? No, but it sounds like the sort of thing
Starting point is 02:58:26 the Adverse would definitely go for. Interesting. Their interests tend to lie in things in the realm of forgotten history. Isn't that her title? She's the Archmage of Antiquity. Yeah, that's her thing, right? That's what she's supposed to do?
Starting point is 02:58:44 Like in the game. Have you come across any interesting artifacts? In my life. That she's dug up me recently? Anything pre-calamity? Sound familiar? Anything related to the Eyes of Nine? I have not, but if you've seen such a thing, please do tell me.
Starting point is 02:59:09 Vess tends to be very secretive with her business. Oh, this has nothing to do with her. Hmm. This is some we've all been like a side hobby, you know? I do not believe I have. But I am curious. Have a side hobby? You should have a side hobby. Heard anything about this artifact
Starting point is 02:59:33 or Eyes of Nine you speak of? Yeah. Worth a shot. Origami's very, you know, you could probably, the mental health aspect of just having something that's not intrinsically related to your work, you know, you should get a hobby. He has a hobby. He's a sculptor.
Starting point is 02:59:57 In a way. The tree's outside your windows. What is that supposed to be? I just wanted to provide a gentle atmosphere. Do you not like it? I can change it for you. I would love that. What did you prefer? Coastal view.
Starting point is 03:00:24 Without moving or even looking away, you watch as all the windows shift into a moonlit, oceanside night. You can see waves breaking against the sides of the ocean beaches. Is it ocean on both sides, or is it ocean on one side? It looks like it's ocean on one side, and then it curves around and you begin to see the coast on the other.
Starting point is 03:00:45 Cool. Like you're right on a cliff. Yep, yep, yep. That's neat. Any other parlor tricks you would wish to ask of an Archmage of the Cerberus Assembly? No parlor tricks, but I had actually a question, if you don't mind, Caleb, about your past. Thank you so much for sending him to us Caleb, about your past.
Starting point is 03:01:08 Thank you so much for sending him to us in your weird, psycho way, but we do appreciate making his acquaintance, however dark and creepy the origins were. But, you know, I think, if my memory serves, he was sort of locked up, locked away for a while in a bad place. He would have stayed there forever, right? If someone hadn't freed him?
Starting point is 03:01:37 Most likely, yes. Who freed him? Well, who do you think freed him? And he gestures over toward the symbol on the table that was given to Caleb earlier. What? What he's saying is that he orchestrated it. So he imprisoned you and he freed you.
Starting point is 03:02:04 He left me shut off, and then he turned the lights back on. Wow. That's weird. That's very kind of you. Thank you. Mm. Very generous.
Starting point is 03:02:24 Didn't need those ten years. How is this going? Adolf? Not yet. Adolf leans back, pulls back his sleeves, and you can see the clustered maze-like tattoos that are across his forearms. He pulls back his sleeves and you can see
Starting point is 03:02:48 the clustered maze-like tattoos that are across his forearms. You can see similar scars as to the ones that Caleb had, with what looks to be raised areas of the skin where things are embedded beneath and have healed over. And he goes, It's coming quite handy, to be honest. Does that hurt?
Starting point is 03:03:10 Only a little, the beginning. But it much more hurts the person on the other side. And he tenses his arms, and as he does, you see energy spark through and arc up the arm. You're like a living magical weapon. I like that title, living magical weapon.
Starting point is 03:03:34 His forearms still as amazing as they always were. Yeah, they're more so. More so, he's a fit fucker. Yeah. He gives a little drink and nods to you. I look over at Astrid. What about you? They have come in handy a number of times, yes.
Starting point is 03:04:03 What do I require to give a presentation as well? She pulls her sleeves back and shows the same tattoos. You've talked about Caleb replacing you. Forgive me, I am so forgetful. What's wrong with you? Where are you going? Nowhere, he fails. Nowhere? You don't feel ill?
Starting point is 03:04:40 I take it from the tone of your inquiry that you don't seem to understand the structure of the Cerberus Assembly. I don't. Although I did look up to it when I was younger. I was very curious. I'm sad to report I haven't learned much since then. Hmm.
Starting point is 03:05:01 Membership is only given when a member is stepped down, kicked out, or passes away. And you plan to step down, get kicked out, or? Hopefully not any. I like where I am. Deserved me well for a very long time. It's a very generous offer.
Starting point is 03:05:36 I take it very seriously, truly. What if I decide to walk away? What if I want to be a sailor instead? That is your choice. Easy as that. Of course. But you won't. No.
Starting point is 03:06:11 No, I won't be a sailor. What a shame. You'd make a fine sailor. He really does not. The world would lose one. Terrible at sailing. This world would lose one. Terrible, it's sailing. This has been very informative, illuminating. I don't wish to overstay our welcome. We do have business to attend to.
Starting point is 03:06:38 Any preparations to make? Mm-hmm. Well, regardless, it has been a pleasure to see all of you. Thank you for accepting our invitation and for this quaint bit of conversation. Thank you for the delicious steak. It was really one of the best I've ever had.
Starting point is 03:06:58 Well, I will let the staff know post-haste. Thank you. I will take my leave. Yeah, I say before you go, I think perhaps you were one of the most powerful mages that I've ever had the pleasure to be in the presence of. And for this, I would offer a gift, which I think it has been a long time
Starting point is 03:07:29 since anyone has pointed out to you that you were a fool. Pain doesn't make people. It's love that makes people. The pain is inconsequential. It's love that saves them. And you would know that, but you have none around you. You said so yourself. You surround yourself with lies and deceptions,
Starting point is 03:07:54 and I wish for you in the future to find someone who will mourn you when you are gone. Respectfully. Good night. And he vanishes. Good deuce. That was so tasty. Astrid and Adewolf are just like, yo, you're welcome. That was cat porn.
Starting point is 03:08:24 Adewolf takes his napkin and Yo. You're welcome. That was... Wow. And the wolf takes his napkin and... Do you guys want to hang out or something? You want to go grab a drink? I was going to ask the same thing. Why don't we get out of here? No, I have... Come on, come with us. I have to attend to... The invitation's always open.
Starting point is 03:08:46 And he begins to leave the chamber, Astrid stands up. Whoa. What if you just walked us a block or two away from the tower? Please. It'll be fun. Looks back at Astrid. Walk you beyond the courtyard, yes. Astrid.
Starting point is 03:09:08 Just to make sure you safely make it off the grounds. And they escort you back to the central chamber. It recedes down to the base of the tower. You do not jump this time, because that would hurt. Yeah. Oh yeah. I bend my knees so that I go. Catches up, yeah.
Starting point is 03:09:34 The doors open and lead you back into the courtyard and you step out. You can hear the crickets in the nearby oak trees making their evening noise. I want to thread my arm through Ostrich's as we're walking. It tenses a bit. You hear the owl nearby, going,
Starting point is 03:09:49 . You all continue to walk. I know. Reflex. I'm going to whisper over to her as we're walking. I'm sorry if you thought I was giving you a hard time earlier. I thought maybe you were really mean like Trent, but now I'm feeling really guilty about it
Starting point is 03:10:14 because I don't think you are. So I want to apologize if I came across as rude. I feel very bad about it. She doesn't necessarily lean back, but then speaks quietly towards your direction. You don't know anything about me. No. You do not know what I've done?
Starting point is 03:10:35 Well, I know some of what you've done, and I know that Caleb cares deeply for you, so you can't be all bad. No response. You watch as the wolf, as he's walking along, flicks his wrist and you watch out. He almost pulls it out of the air. Looks like a bottle of some sort of a dark liquor.
Starting point is 03:11:01 He uncorks it. Takes a swig. That's a handy trick. I've got plenty of them, don't worry. I'd love to see more. Would you? Yeah. Pass the bottle over to Astrid.
Starting point is 03:11:19 Okay. Hins it over to Edowulf, takes it, quirks it, and vanishes. You could come with us. You could. You could. No, I could not. Well, maybe we both have some thinking to do. Maybe.
Starting point is 03:12:01 Are you talking to Astrid or Edwulf at this point? Sure. He's talking to Astrid. Okay. Just making sure. We'll be out of the city soon. Don't know when we'll be back. Just be careful. I'm sorry I can't be of more help. Her eyes dart up towards the trees above. You hear again the,
Starting point is 03:12:30 Mm-hmm. Oh, he's an owl now. I get it. We can kidnap you, make it look like a real struggle. She actually smiles at that and goes, I appreciate the candor. As you guys reach the gates that lead off of the estate itself, Eddwolf pushes it open.
Starting point is 03:13:06 It is certainly one of the more interesting than there's ever been, too. I like you. Thank you, I like you, too. Don't let that stuff get to your head. He's, that guy's a little oof. Yeah. I would be careful not to say things to people like him.
Starting point is 03:13:32 If I had to live here, no. Oof. I had to live here? Anyway. He's about to say something to Caduceus, anyway. Asur, good spending time. I throw a cross pass again and puts his hand on your shoulder.
Starting point is 03:13:58 She keeps bringing us together. And he walks on. Does he have any marks of the matron on him anywhere? Passive perception on Caleb, no marks on him, but you do catch, as he's leaning forward, touching your shoulder, there is a flash of a small silver pendant of a raven feather.
Starting point is 03:14:28 Those are multi-class. Astrid lingers for a moment. Oh, oh, oh! I'm going to use Disguise Self, and I'm going to make my hair very long about Dandu here. See, you can do it. There's no worries to have. It's pretty great, yeah.
Starting point is 03:14:51 But I want to be able to do like, you know, and actually make it move. Well, give it time. Okay. Sure you don't want to come get a drink with us now that the walking road pylon is left? I appreciate the offer, but I should not.
Starting point is 03:15:27 Funny that he let Caleb go and not you. Strange, don't you think? Is it funny that he let Caleb go and not you? It seems odd. Caleb is always his favorite, Brynn. Well, you were always mine. You mean what you said in there, right? To stop him. I cannot hear.
Starting point is 03:16:13 Sorry. I'm sorry. You mean what you said in there, to stop him? I... Yeah. Nothing is set in stone. I... Yeah. Nothing is set in stone, not for you or anyone. Raise you to the top.
Starting point is 03:16:42 She turns and heads back into the courtyard. Hmm. Hmm. Are you okay, Caleb? Let's get away from here. Let's get a little bit away. Stares at the tower for a moment. Okay.
Starting point is 03:17:10 Yeah? Yeah. Where's that bucket at? I know, fuck that. I'm not keeping my eyes out for any owls in this town. You still have that pistol, yeah? Yeah. It's fucking owls. I mean, you start shooting.
Starting point is 03:17:20 Owl season. All the wizards come out and kill us. I was going to say, nothing really draws attention in the middle of the most wealthy, magical district in the capital city than just a bunch of rapid gunfire in the middle of the courtyard. Well, it's people running from a swarm of owls. Yeah.
Starting point is 03:17:46 Well, we didn't die. We didn't fight. No. Just had dinner. That's good, right? It was good. The steak was outstanding. Oh my god.
Starting point is 03:17:56 It was so good. It was the best. I mean, it was... I didn't die, though. I'm starving. Yeah, let's go. Let's find a dive bar. I'm mad I didn't try it, but I just, out of principle, I didn't want to touch anything.
Starting point is 03:18:08 I get that. I totally get that. I feel like out of principle, I wanted to touch it all. Yeah, I get it. I get it. He looks sickly, right? Has he always looked like that? I feel like he's always looked like shit, but he did look particularly sickly, right? He had a little more vigor in my youth,
Starting point is 03:18:28 but not much. God. Nothing different than the last time you encountered him. He just generally has that Mr. Burns complexion about him. All right, fair, fair, fair. Okay. Do you know how old he is? Well, unless he has pulled the wool over my eyes
Starting point is 03:18:51 in another way, he's in his late 70s. Late 70s, yeah. Mm. He needs to take a hint from the ladies and use some of those glamors. Yeah. Let's get out of the Shimmer Ward. I want to have a drink in the Shimmer Ward.
Starting point is 03:19:09 Yeah. Caleb, I'm really sorry that I made a comment about Astrid's haircut. Oh. I was trying to be shitty, and that was a horrible thing to do. I thought you complimented her. Yeah, but I did it in that girl way,
Starting point is 03:19:28 where I was being a shithead about it. You were being a mean girl? I was being a mean girl. That's not cool. That's never cool. You sounded like you were complimenting her. Oh, that was totally code for mean girl. Like, your hair is really cute.
Starting point is 03:19:41 It was so mean. That's code for like, what the fuck are you doing? That's how the girls used to talk to me when I was outside. I don't know why I did it. Well, we all learn it somewhere, I guess. Is that really mean? Your hair is cute. I think you were just- Depends on how you say it.
Starting point is 03:19:55 Oh, okay, so that was about that thing. We also didn't know if she was going to be- I thought she was about to put her foot in. Yeah, yeah, I know exactly what you're- Trying to stick up for a friend. Yeah. Well, yeah. No, I think that the slightly mean hair comment was the worst thing that happened tonight
Starting point is 03:20:10 and the worst thing that was talked about. Yeah, I'm going to take anything away tonight. I am so fucking tired of manipulative assholes. He's so manipulative. Like, what's the deal? Why is that a theme with all of us? I'm fucking tired of manipulative assholes. He's so manipulative. Like, what's the deal? Why is that a theme with all of us? Well, we spend a lot of time around government.
Starting point is 03:20:41 It's the best thing you've ever said. I missed it. What did she say? I don't know what you're talking about. That is a bit of a theme. I don't know why so many people have gone through such great lengths to try and convince us all that they're responsible for our success. It's weird. The manipulation, if I hear one more person try and claim that pain is the only way
Starting point is 03:21:15 to make a resilient person, what a shitty excuse. He's such a bad man. But you didn't want to just, you know, quick draw on him? Take him down right there in his dining room? I give myself a 30% chance of success. You got us with you.
Starting point is 03:21:38 Element of surprise. I give us 40% chance of success. Really, I would've thought they would've dropped it to like 28. In there. We could've done it. In there, Dicey. He's not killing him. As soon as we walked in, I was not able to see
Starting point is 03:21:57 anything with my vision anymore. It was immediately dispelled. He can probably block some of our magic. Yeah, I bet. There's no way we would've gotten out. dispel. He can probably block some of our magic. There's no way we would have gotten out. Plus he had Astrid and Eadwulf on his side. They're both probably pretty powerful. Not as powerful as
Starting point is 03:22:14 you, Caleb, let's be honest, but pretty powerful. I don't care that they had more years. It doesn't matter. You're very powerful. Did we find a tavern? He said it himself. He's surrounded by people who despise him and lie to him. The minute that he slips up, someone's going to take him out anyway.
Starting point is 03:22:30 We don't have to do anything. He set up his own destruction. The minute he stopped losing, I'm sure both of them would turn on him in a heartbeat, and he knows it. It's just so dumb. But he's not dumb. So why? He so dumb. But he's not dumb. So why?
Starting point is 03:22:49 Emotionally, maybe. Narrow-minded, yes, but he's calculated. He knows exactly what he's saying. Yeah, he's always been one to control narrative. And that is a big part of holding on to power, controlling narrative. And that is a big part of holding onto power, controlling narrative. I believed him. I believed him that your parents said,
Starting point is 03:23:11 do whatever it takes. Because. I didn't feel like he was lying there, but. Of course. I have a feeling. There's no way they knew what that meant. I have a funny feeling that if we brought them back for a five-minute chat, their first response would be, I didn't agree to this. Yeah.
Starting point is 03:23:26 Caleb, on that note, I was thinking about it at dinner. I mean, between Caduceus and I, we could bring them back. Don't you need a body? Body. Oh. Yeah. Was there a grave for them or anything?
Starting point is 03:23:51 I think you just need bones. Yeah, is there a marking anywhere? Do you know? I have not looked into it. I mean, if it's something you want to look into. Let me think about that. There is a very good chance that the
Starting point is 03:24:12 Scourgers collected their remains, but maybe. I'm sorry to bring it up. No, you are all trying to help me. No. Let's find that dive bar, and then there's an inn,
Starting point is 03:24:37 a place I know where we can stay tonight. Okay. Easy enough to find a dive bar. There are plenty of places in Rexxentrum, especially up in the northern, more mud-lightened region. You stumble into one of the nearby dive bars, not making too much of a fuss, and find a place to comfortably feel like you can talk.
Starting point is 03:25:04 Did that go well for you? No. No, it gave me 50 more questions. Seems like Astrid was, you know, not a total sociopath. Maybe. I quite liked both of them, actually. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 03:25:28 They're very likable. Well. They always were. I've got a pretty good read on people. I think they're all right. And you did a good thing for them today. Showed them what life could be like, even just for a second. Maybe it'll stick in them.
Starting point is 03:25:48 I find myself wondering his plan for me to take wing and achieve the things he wanted without being right under his thumb. Eh. under his thumb. If I go off and do anything with you all, is it part of his plan? I got the sense he's kind of winging it. Oh, I don't know.
Starting point is 03:26:22 They hand-delivered a letter to you when you were in Rexxentrum. I think he's pretty much on top of it. Oh, I don't know. They hand-delivered a letter to you when you were in Rexxentrum. I think he's pretty much on top of it. He's not directing us, though. This is just him taking credit for what you're doing so that you can feel like you're being manipulated. This is just a person who can't admit that they're not in control.
Starting point is 03:26:44 It's like a tarot card reader. Yeah, that's actually a point to use. This is just a person who can't admit that they're not in control. It's like a tarot card reader. Yeah, that's actually a very fair estimation. That's not a good comparison at all. It's a great comparison. I'm brilliant. Hey, speaking of tarot cards and stuff and controlling the narrative. Do you want me to read your fortune?
Starting point is 03:27:05 I do. While you're doing that, something that I assume you told me earlier about the research that you did today, or rather didn't do. Yeah. What if, crazy theory? I'm here for it.
Starting point is 03:27:21 What if there's no record of the Eyes of Nine in the Cobalt Library? Not because they're hiding it from you, but because it was scrubbed, because this Trent man or his ilk are somehow controlling the narrative. They don't want anyone to know about it, or maybe even the Cobalt Soul itself.
Starting point is 03:27:46 But Trent didn't seem to know what it was. I deliberately wanted to see, and he... He didn't seem to know, but he's a crafty fucker. He is, but not... I didn't get that vibe. He immediately asked if it was something that Vess put us up to. So that, to me, clued me in
Starting point is 03:28:02 on how laser-focused he is on that aspect. Scrubbed, absolutely. From Trent? I don't know. The Cobalt Soul, they did also ask me if they went under any other names. If we know of any other associative language attached to the Eyes of Nine. Well, we know Nonagon, right? So I was thinking about that.
Starting point is 03:28:28 And then, here's the other crazy thing. Nothing to do with your shit. Really sorry. Kind of going on a tangent. I don't know. Maybe it's all connected. So Trent asked us about Shadangrad and Tomb Raiding. Nonagon, where is it?
Starting point is 03:28:45 Hang on. Rhymes with. Cree. Has 14 letters! Which is this thing. When you rearrange them and add their numeral position together. Remember to drink your oval tea. Cool. But no, that Cree that we talked to
Starting point is 03:29:05 at the Gentleman's Lair asked about Nonagon and said that she was a part of his team called the Tomb Takers, and that they were running from a spellcaster two years ago. Running from a spellcaster named Trent Ikithon? Or Vessaragna. Oh my god. The lady of antiquities
Starting point is 03:29:28 who sends people off on to rob tombs. But that wasn't. Close to both. And I was already planning on going to see my dad. This is perfect. Cree was that person's name? Cree, the tabaxi. And Cree recognized? Nonagon.
Starting point is 03:29:44 Nonagon, which was? Molly. Molly. And? My Molly notes. I mean, they would probably know. Stole a book in trouble with the law, ritual versus a telepharts spell. Stole a book.
Starting point is 03:30:02 Did they steal a book or something? I'm trying to decipher my notes like a year later. More or less, best that you can recall. They maybe stole a book, I don't know. But they were running from someone and they were called the Tomb Takers. Whoa. I remember that. Maybe we should just-
Starting point is 03:30:17 Oh, the Tomb Takers or the Task Takers I wrote down. Oh. But no, I also wrote down Tomb Takers. The Task, what if- Oh no, are they the Tombtaskers? No, no, no. Tombtaker's Task. I wrote down Tombtakers or Tasktakers. What if we just, while we're hanging out at Vast,
Starting point is 03:30:33 and we're like, oh my god, we should come up with a group name or something. I got an idea, the Tombtaker. And see what she says. And see if she's like, it's a pretty good idea. Just talk to them. Yeah. Yeah, that's a pretty good idea. Just talk to them. Yeah.
Starting point is 03:30:47 Or that. Your plans are always so boring. I'll let you go first. Just, I'd like to have a back, I'd like to have a plan G. Sure, sure. Plan G. Then I feel like there was another thing.
Starting point is 03:31:02 Oh! Oh! Okay, hang on. Because you mentioned that to Taxi before. We are in a bar while she does this. It's so perfect. Just flinging notebooks around as Beau goes through all of her notebooks.
Starting point is 03:31:16 Can we get a round of drinks and some yarn? Oh, oh, wait. Some tax, please. Yeah, yeah, hold on, it's coming. This is super conspiracy theory-tastic. But, okay, so we're going to excavate the city of Aeor, and it was this mage-ocrity. Mage-ocracy, yeah. And they think that no survivors lived, right?
Starting point is 03:31:41 Right. But what if there was one? Who? Halas. Who's Halas? Oh, the gem guy. Yes, because when we were in his little ball with the Astral Sea thing, we already mentioned this in the Happy Fun Ball
Starting point is 03:32:00 and how we saw the Astral Sea. I wanted to follow up at this this coming week in the libraries and see if. Right. Yes. Because he had that map, and it was the map that you touched the red gem of, and it was pre-calamity. Oh yeah, definitely.
Starting point is 03:32:19 The stained glass window was a pre-calamity map. So maybe this guy was from pre-calamity and he got super obsessed with living for forever, but maybe, what if he's a survivor from Aeor? Aeor. Aeorda. Aeorda. No, that is plausible. But I don't know how any of this connects! Well, the Astral Sea also connects to Vokodo somehow, right?
Starting point is 03:32:45 That's where we came from. What if Aeor is part of that weird floating city that we saw? What if it just like, oh, that's Aeor and it just like, bamfed into? Like it was so magical, it just like, scared, it just like, it didn't actually crash. We've been thinking about the whole world! Or a contemporary, another city of the time.
Starting point is 03:33:09 While all this is happening, I'm going to be telling Fjord's fortune with tarot cards. I didn't ask you. Why do you keep putting the cards in? I'm going to pull out the cards. Just choose a number between one and 20. Roll your dice. Oh.
Starting point is 03:33:23 I got tarot cards. Eight. Okay, that's going to be the card you pulled out. dice. Oh. That's not terrible. Eight. They are now. Okay, that's going to be the card you pulled out. Okay. Okay. Oh. Okay. Going to see what that is. I was going to say, I don't remember the last time I sent you that document.
Starting point is 03:33:35 Okay. I don't know. I'm just going to read this card for you. And interpret it. This tells me my future? Obviously, I'm going to interpret it. It's my future or what? This is going to be where you are right now, in your present.
Starting point is 03:33:49 Okay. The eye and the hand is the card. So. Both of those things, it's amazing. Yeah, one way. Which? Pick, pick. Roll a d6.
Starting point is 03:34:06 I feel like you're making this up. Two. Okay. So the eye is facing towards you. An eye is held by two hands forming a triangle. The hands are holding the eye above a restless sea. An eye! Yeah! I know! Above a restless sea! Amazing!
Starting point is 03:34:41 Oh my god, what? The triangle is like Rumblecusp. Oh my gosh, this, okay. Now roll another d20. There's more? Yeah, then this is going to be your future. Wait, wait, what was the interpretation of that? Oh, that's, you know, obviously,
Starting point is 03:34:56 you are torn between where you came from, which is the Eye, and the sea, the turmoil of the Wild Mother right now. You're figuring out who you are in this very moment. Do you go and take care of Uk'otoa? Uk'otoa. Uk'otoa. Uk'otoa. Or do you follow the path that's being laid in front of you by her?
Starting point is 03:35:19 11. I am so. Oh my god, this is such a good card. I love this so much. This card is called Home or Traveler. Traveler? Yeah. Oh. Oh wait, is this a secondary card?
Starting point is 03:35:36 Yeah, this is the future card. Oh, okay, okay. A covered carnival wagon on a road with a cottage cozy in the distance. That's us? Yeah. What's going on with you? When we met you, we were at a carnival. Yeah.
Starting point is 03:35:55 So it's a carnival park, but it's a cozy cottage in the distance, Fjord. We are your home. Don't you see? You're on the road right now. You feel like everything is a circus. You don't know what's going on, but in the distance, Fjord,
Starting point is 03:36:12 there is a cozy home waiting for you. That's your future. A cozy home? Yeah! Your home, your place. You will find it. That's wonderful, Jester. I know, isn't it?
Starting point is 03:36:35 Anybody else? Caleb, as a note, too, going off the conversation with Beauregard, that was amazing. You did know, because you recalled this as you were recalling information about Halas in the Folding Halls. He is historically known to have hailed from...
Starting point is 03:36:56 Zydel? From, well, the- He has books about Zydel. Right, well, Zydel was the society, the actual, like the Council of Zydel, which he was part of, but the actual city that he was from was Xemnias, which was another one of the floating cities, kind of a competitive nation to where Aeor would have come from,
Starting point is 03:37:17 that when it fell in the Calamity, the survivors of that are who began the early Dwendalian Empire. When Xemnias fell? Yeah, Xemnias fell, which is why it's called the Xalian Empire. When Xemnius fell? Yeah, Xemnius fell, which is why it's called the Xemni Fields, and Xemni is the language. It's all based on the survivors and scroungers. Of another separate floating city.
Starting point is 03:37:36 Correct. Okay, so scratch the hole, he was from Aeor. But same time, and neighboring. Same leading theory. Xemnius was much smaller, and comparatively to Aeor, Aeor was like the superpower. Xemnias was still a powerful agent, you know, one of a handful of floating mage nations. Yeah, and it would be very interesting
Starting point is 03:37:57 to dive back into the Halls of Halas and find him and ask him questions, but that is quite a, that's a tall order. But there's also all this business with the resdune and the abyssal invasion that he apparently threatened. Yeah, it seems like there's all sorts of other realms and planes sort of converging here
Starting point is 03:38:24 for some reason. I had written down the same thing. Well, I mean. Oh, yeah. What was that? I had an order of Tomb-takers? Went north to Shadengard, Mollymauk's Old Order. To Shadengard, really?
Starting point is 03:38:40 Okay, okay. Mollymauk's Old Order. He pulled them off from the main order. No idea what that means. He made a sect. Yeah. So, yeah. It's a sect. I mean, this was- I'm a sect. That's good.
Starting point is 03:38:54 What if it was Vess Javragna that was coming after him? I'm lost. I mean, right after where I wrote- Well, a magical woman revived him. Huh? A magical woman revived him. Huh? A magical woman revived him, right? He, yeah, he just woke up. I wrote down a magical woman revived him. It was a ritual spell.
Starting point is 03:39:13 He doesn't know. He doesn't remember, huh? I remember that as well. A woman helped pull him out of it, to my recollection. Chat is just screaming at us right now. Oh, sure, they've got to figure that out. Fuck it, idiots! I'm screaming along with them right now. But guys, next, where I wrote Tomb Takers and Nonagon,
Starting point is 03:39:31 I've also written Mahogany Desk and Young Bearded Gnome. You've cracked it. We've cracked the case! What if... Armed gummy bear gnome. What if Nonagon was pillaged? What if he was, instead of the robber, what if he was the robbie? Robbie! Robbie!
Starting point is 03:40:05 Love you, Robbie. I am genuinely delighted. He's not Molly, he's Robbie! I don't know, man. I have so many notes and... Beau, drink your beer. It's got to connect. Who gave her a straw for a beer? It's all I got, man.
Starting point is 03:40:25 It's just a weird-ass mixology bar. Not on this side of Rexxentrum. We have someone we can talk to. Who? Tabaxi, Cree. So we're going to go to Zadash next. And then maybe your dad can set up a honest conversation.
Starting point is 03:40:46 With Cree? Yeah, no threats, no harm. If Cree's there. I can send my dad a message. Do it. And ask if he can gather Cree there. Do it. I'm going to send my dad a message.
Starting point is 03:40:56 All right. Hi, Dad, it's me. We have a favor to ask. Can you get Cree? We need to talk to him. Him? Her. Her. Her, shit. Her.
Starting point is 03:41:15 Him, her. Super important. I love you. Chester, it's been a while. I'd love to help, but Cree left months ago and hasn't returned, so I have no idea where she is. Damn it. Send Cree a message. Sorry.
Starting point is 03:41:42 Anyway, I... Actually, might be able to find them. Yeah, can we? Can we send Cree a message? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I met Cree, right? Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to send Cree a message. Okay.
Starting point is 03:41:59 God, that was right. Hi, Cree. Yeah. It's Jester. Remember me? Where are you? I need to talk to you. It's about... Molly. Nonagon, say Nonagon. Nonagon. Or Lucien. Or Lucien, you know?
Starting point is 03:42:17 Let me know, okay? That was four. Let me know, okay? Yeah. Lemmy, we're treating you to a word. I hope you're messaging me, but that was four. A few moments pass before you get a response. Who is this? Oh.
Starting point is 03:42:40 She doesn't remember me. I don't think I can help you. That's it. I'm going to send the message back. The blue girl, Jester. We met a while ago. I had a group of friends. We knew Lucien.
Starting point is 03:43:02 Lucien. At the club? At the gentleman's club? At the evening nip. At the club? At the gentleman's club? At the club. Yeah, it's at the evening nip. At the evening nip. Down to the floor? No, money is involved.
Starting point is 03:43:13 Money's involved. Good job, good job. A few more moments pass. A few more moments pass. After a while, you get the sense that there's going to be no response. Oh. A few more moments pass. After a while, you get the sense that there's going to be no response. Oh! Bitch, she made me waste a spell slot.
Starting point is 03:43:32 Cats. Well, if she works for the gentleman, then we know the gentleman has her blood, and the gentleman should be able to trace her. Go tomorrow. That's a good point. Point of interesting order, she was the one who kept
Starting point is 03:43:48 and extracted the blood for the gentleman. Fuck! That was specifically her skill set. So she would probably? She was a blood cleric. Oh. Very similar to Amalia. Mm.
Starting point is 03:44:02 Mm. Mm. Mm. Well, that's a dead end. Oh, Molly! Hmm. Hmm! Hmm! Hmm! Hmm! Hmm! Well, that's a dead end. Uh, well. What do we do? What do we do?
Starting point is 03:44:12 I got things. We go to Antarctica and we fucking find an underground city and some other crazy magic shit. Well, we're going to do that, but first. Well, somebody asked us. We have a whole week in Rexxentrum. We also have Scrum. Or anywhere we want to be.
Starting point is 03:44:27 Well, I do want to see my dad. I guess I don't have to, I can just send him messages. I feel like talking to your dad anyway, just to see if we can get any information. Yeah, a handful of words is different than... Plus, we can see Pumat! Don't you guys have things you want enchanted? Always.
Starting point is 03:44:44 Oh, so many things. Yeah, that ring of yours, you got to get some magic into that. Yes. I'd like to talk to him about that, actually. Well, what if we hold up here in town for the night and in the morning spend the day in Zadash. Okay.
Starting point is 03:45:08 Okay. You don't think Iggy Thong's going to come after you? No, I am his chosen. I will lead the Empire into a thousand years of glory. Mm-hmm. Or something. No, not tonight. Besides, I have this place we can stay tonight that I think you will love. Oh, a new spot?
Starting point is 03:45:36 Not the shitty tavern we were at? Not the shitty tavern. All right. Trust me? Trust the shitty tavern. All right. Trust me? Trust. Totally, man. All right. I slap down two gold. I have no idea what the bill was, but I'm sure that covers it.
Starting point is 03:45:51 It definitely covers it. Head towards the door, and I will... Fucking Mighty Neiners, baby! I'm not going to say this to any of them, but I will either go to the same basic ass inn that we went to earlier earlier or whatever's closest. Okay. To where you are now, you're a little bit further away.
Starting point is 03:46:11 Yeah. So you would be finding a new location. And it's not hard to find. They're all pretty, you know, you're on the cusp of squalor in this part of the city. Yeah, that's good. Okay. So I will find a place that doesn't look like an instant death trap, but not being that picky.
Starting point is 03:46:30 Okay. I'll lead everybody in. Wow. And walk up to whoever is at the front desk. Okay, you walk up to the front desk and you see a human woman, her 50s or so, hair that's gone gray at the roots that goes to a bit of red at the end. It's probably been a long time since either it was dyed or the hair color has faded over time. Very
Starting point is 03:46:53 leathery skin that's seen a harsh life. She's sitting there at the edge with what looks like a big tankard and looks like partway into her cups and turns to you. Eh. Good evening. I know it's somewhat late, but there are, I'm going to need nine rooms for the evening. And in one of them, I specifically need a closet or a wardrobe.
Starting point is 03:47:24 I have a lot of luggage. Do you have something that can accommodate that? Probably. Okay. Right, right, nine rooms. Closet. In one of them, at least, yeah. Or as an extra charge for the closet. I think I can handle that. Closet fee.
Starting point is 03:47:43 I will pay your closet fee. Right, right. That'll run you two gold pieces, including the closet fee. Okay, I hand her. Final deal. I give her three gold. Right. Which way? This way.
Starting point is 03:48:04 Sebastian, bring up the closet! Bring up the closet? His voice, like, What do you mean, big man? Empty out the meats and carry it upstairs for everyone outside! You see this older man come out, this dirty face, has been in the kitchen sweating,
Starting point is 03:48:23 and he's like, What do you mean, empty out the meat closet? Tosses a gold to him. come out, this dirty face, has been in the kitchen sweating, and he's like, What do you mean empty out the main closet? Tosses a gold to him. I'll say. He goes, oh, all right. You hear a door open, and as you guys make your way out there,
Starting point is 03:48:36 these rooms are functional. This is really nice, Caleb. Each is a bed. Thank you for bringing us here. She's not on an airline. I tip Sebastian, was that his name? Yeah. I tip Sebastian a silver.
Starting point is 03:48:51 Okay. And before everyone heads to bed, just come in with me for a moment. I want to discuss one last thing. You need some help? I'll go up and... I got it! I got it! I'm going to help him. Fine.
Starting point is 03:49:06 He takes it and you carry it in this kind of. Is he carrying a whisper booth? What has he got? No, no, it's a wardrobe that had been fashioned as a meat storage rack in the kitchen downstairs, but it's been emptied out, so it smells strongly of cured meats,
Starting point is 03:49:23 of various degrees of freshness, but it is a functional, empty wardrobe. Amazing. I'm picturing an Ikea Malm. Closet with just a bunch of blood on the bottom. Yeah, more or less. It is a stained interior. But it is placed in the room.
Starting point is 03:49:43 Thank you kindly. Sleep well. And he heads off and shuffles his way back downstairs. Okay, I get the last of the nine in, and I shut the door. Give me one second. And I open the door of this wardrobe closet, which smells, and I pull out the wand that Kalyana gave me, and I look at the bottom of the wardrobe, and there's a little hole, a little imperfection in the wood, a knot, and I stick the wand into that hole so it's
Starting point is 03:50:11 standing up. And then I pull out several pieces of stained glass and arrange them just so, and I take out a small piece of slate and put, excuse me, granite, and put that on the ground and that little wooden cat that I had fabricated, I put on top of the granite and I then begin to use chalk to draw around those and I draw a solid line behind that wand and start to utter words and a moment of this, and that chalk line begins to glow a thin golden-amber color, and a rectangle of amber shimmers up from that line, and the amber begins to waver, and past it, you see just the barest glimpse of windows of stained glass stretching up into the air. And I say, welcome home. And I walk in. Ooh!
Starting point is 03:51:16 Walking in. Same, same, same, same, same. Let's go, let's go. As you all step into the wardrobe to follow Caleb into whatever strange realm he seems to have called you into, we're going to go ahead and call the episode to the night. Oh! What did you do?
Starting point is 03:51:36 He kills us all. Cat scratch closet. Yeah, we'll pick up there next episode. What else? You get to think on your description. I'm sure you've been thinking on it for a while. Anyway, thank you all so much for joining us. Hope you enjoyed it as much as we did. We love you very much, and is it Thursday yet?
Starting point is 03:51:58 Good night. No! And this concludes the current chapter of Critical Role. Your essays on the history and impact of the various ages and epochs of Exandria are eagerly anticipated. Just kidding. No homework for you, but if you are inspired to do some writing, please leave us a review. Your words can really help new folks find our show and encourage them to give it a try. Thank you so much for joining us on this adventure.
Starting point is 03:52:27 Until next time.

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