Critical Role - C2E33 The Ruby and the Sapphire

Episode Date: September 7, 2018

Beach episode! The Mighty Nein explore Nicodranas and Jester reunites with her mother, the famed Ruby of the Sea...Watch Critical Role live Thursdays at 7pm PT on https://www.twitch.tv/criticalrole

Hello, bees! This is Laura Bailey, here to welcome you to the Critical Role podcast. If you'd like to tune into the show as it airs, you can watch Critical Role Thursdays at 7 p.m. Pacific on twitch.tv slash criticalrole and youtube.com slash criticalrole. Our lovely Twitch subscribers can view the episode on demand right away. Or you can find it on YouTube Mondays at 12pm Pacific. And of course, for all you fantastic podcast listeners, Critical Role episodes hit feeds on Thursday mornings, a week after the episode first airs. With all that said, let's get into another episode of Critical Role. And hello, everyone. Welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role,

where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons. Three of us who are gone are happy to be back. We missed you guys terribly. Back from the dust and chaos. But anyway, as we adjust, let's go ahead and get through our announcements real fast. First and foremost, we have two wonderful sponsors tonight, beginning first with our friends at D&D Beyond. Is this me? That's you, Sam. Guys! I'm actually nervous. Guys, the number nine has been very important to us, and tonight it's important for another reason. D&D Beyond wants you to know that at 9 p.m. tonight, the Waterdeep

Dragon Heist Adventure releases on D&D Beyond. It's 9 p.m. Pacific. That's in two hours, so it'll officially be available for purchase through D&D Beyond Marketplace. Don't forget to pick it up in a couple of hours. Set your alarms. We'll probably remind you when 9 o'clock comes around. But that's not all. The number 9 is special for other weird reasons. This Sunday, September 9th, or 9-9, is the first game of the regular season for Travis' favorite team, the Dallas Cowboys. They're already ranked top of their conference, as much as it pains me to say. Travis, two years ago, they won nine straight games. Last year, they won how many regular season games? Nine.

Nine, yes. This year in training camp, the standout defensive player was none other than Antoine Woods, number 99. To honor this amazing concurrence of the number nine, I have done the unthinkable. I am wearing a Dallas Cowboys t-shirt. Guys, I have to say, it feels pretty good. It feels pretty outstanding. I mean, it, it feels a little odd. Oh god, what's happening? Oh god, it feels really weird. Oh my god. Oh god, guys. I think my heart exploded. Oh god, guys, I think I'm...

No! No! Oh my god. No. He died because of the shirt. We have to get the shirt off of him! We have to get the No! No! No! Oh my god. Oh my god, no. He died because of the shirt. We have to get the shirt off of him! We have to get the shirt off of him! Are you an accomplice in this fucking thing? We have to take it off of him quick!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, wow. Oh, guys! Guys, it was the shirt!

You know what? I'm okay with this. I feel better. You have blood on my fucking clothes. You have to play like that all night. Regal. And definitely blood on the Wyrmwood. Guys!

No! Oh wow, that's everything. New level. Hope it was worth it. He told me he was doing artboard and in blood! It went down instead of up, didn't it? It did! Oh no!

Oh god! It's everywhere! Do you have a change of pants? Bloody crotch. Oh my god. That's what you get. You called down the thunder and you paid for it. Oh shit! Oh my god. The point is, he's alive.

The point is, nine o'clock tonight, guys. D&D Beyond. Blood. I love you, Travis. Go Dallas. That's why you wouldn't hug me before the show. No hugs before the show when you're up to shit. I saw Max holding that tubing. Should've asked. You're going to be so sticky. What's it taste like? Peppermint? Mm, that's not good.

No? Of course not. You immediately say. I don't think it's mouth blood. There's different types for on-camera stuff. Well, Sam. Oh god. I'm happy you're healthy

and that you survived this terrible assault on your career. Special effects, guys. Well done. Laura, were you're healthy, and that you survived this terrible assault on your crew. Special effects, guys. Well done. Laura, were you recruited to help with that? She texted me saying, is Travis going to be upset with me? Because he didn't tell me what was happening.

I was like, no, he's just going to be upset with me. You. I'm actually very proud of you. I guess the rest of us just can't understand the pressure of coming up with a D&D Beyond event. Every week. He finally snapped. Covered himself in fake blood. Yeah, he jumps a shark on that one, man.

More announcements, guys! Thank you, Sam, and thank you, D&D Beyond. I got two more announcements. Yep, we have tons. Yeah. Thank you, Sam, and thank you, D&D PR. I got two more announcements. Yep, that's true, we have tons. So, following up on that, we had another announcement coming up. We're excited that we're now doing a live show

for our appearance in New York Comic Con. That's right! New York City! We are coming to you guys. East Coast, this show is finally for you. We are going to be at the United Palace Theater in Washington Heights, Thursday night at 9pm, October 4th, the Thursday before NYCC. It's our first time on the East Coast. Take a train, take a plane, take an

automobile, whatever it takes. Come and see us. I do believe the VIP tickets are sold out, but there are plenty of general admission seats still available. It is a gorgeous theater. Liam, back me up. There's actually a few little orchestra seats that are also available. It's covered in gold! It is. Gorgeous proscenium arch theater, for those of you that are theater nerds like us. We would love to see you there. It's going to be raucous and amazing. If you haven't made it to our Gen Con live show, or one of the ones we did in LA back in the day, don't miss it. The one we did in LA?

Yeah, the one. The one. The one we did in LA back in the day. Don't miss it. The one we did in LA? Yeah, the one. The one. The one we did in LA. It's frenetic and crazy, so please, please come and join us. It will be amazing, and I'm sure Sam will dress entirely normally. I'm sure. Why don't you have Laura and Travis for this one? No one's going to retain any of the things

you just said in the wake of that. No, no, no. There will be links to buy tickets somewhere. You can get them on Ticketmaster. Just go to Ticketmaster and look up CritRoll. CritRoll.com, I think, has all the information as well. Marisha, I believe we had the latest episode of Handbooker Helper.

New episode. Whoa, you guys. New episode of Handbooker Helper. And it's Liam giving you the first quick build on how to build a rogue. Also, super quick, to address all the people who were a little confused why we went from dice basics to character sheets, we're wanting to show that we're going to be doing a little bit of everything and we're going to be rolling out tips while we also build out character stuff. That way we can get newbies playing as quickly as possible, because in our experience, the first thing you do is push over a character sheet to

somebody. Jump right in. You just jump right in. Best way to let them swim. We're also two weeks in and in a year there will be a library of content that will last forever or until civilization falls. That's true. Two weeks in, and in a year, there will be a library of content that will last forever or until civilization falls. That's true.

So be patient. 10 years. Rules are coming. It is coming. 10,000 years. We can only produce as fast as Max's little hands can manage. Fair enough. Thank you, guys. That was really good Dr. Claw.

Yeah. Oh, did you catch it? Such a classic voice. I know. I love it. Sam, you have something you want to talk about, too? Guys, there's a quick update to the Poblove Foundation charity push.

Do you have squibs of fake shit ready for this? You look like you just gave us a calf. We hit our first two goals. We hit $20,000, which means I'll be running a one-shot of Crash Pandas. We hit 50,000, which means that the critters have contributed enough money to finance an actual research grant that will go towards curing childhood cancer. We've added a new goal. We're going to try to raise $100,000 for the Pavlov Foundation. If we hit that goal, Sam And that $100,000 will be able to fully fund the Shudderbugs Summer Photography Camp, which is a week-long summer camp

for children suffering from cancer, and they can all get to go to this photography camp and they learn how to do artwork and art, and it's incredible. So more details are at critrole.com and donate now at give.classy.org slash teamherter. All the links will be before you. More announcements.

What was that word in there, classy? Classy. Yeah. It was hard watching you deliver that while looking like you just murdered someone in cold blood. You're talking about wonderful things while looking so incriminating. This comes out. This washes out, right? Yeah. Yeah. Thank you, Sam, and thank you, Critters,

for your fantastic support of this awesome charitable cause. Also wanted to just give a quick congratulations to all of our Indian Critters of the LGBT community for a fantastic win today. We love you very much, and a step in the right direction. Now, let me see, do we have any merch announcements, Laura? Just the same announcements from last week.

Which is all the stuff that was available at Gen Con is now available in our store. So you can go there and check out some maps that are amazing. We have the Wild Map maps, now available by Devon Rue. They're really beautiful. And we've got pins, and we've got t-shirts, and we've got bumper stickers that are

praising the Traveler's name. There you have it. Awesome, and we have our second, and to finish up here with our second sponsor tonight, kind of booking in it for you, our friends at Raven Rook, who are just jumping into their Kickstarter. If you guys haven't seen, they have these really awesome high-quality disc-bound journal gaming notebooks

that you can use, which are all different designs and thieves look awesome. They have all the information you can fill in there. Character stuff, spells and levels and stuff. It's really, really bad ass. Their quality's awesome, so you can go and check out their stuff now at therookandtheraven.com slash Critical Role. Get there before the Kickstarter campaign

ends on September 20th, so you only got a couple more weeks on that, but go check it out. They're amazing, the quality of this is fantastic. Yeah, they are. Yeah, check it out. I believe that's all of our announcements. Whoa. After a two-week hiatus from our main story,

let's go ahead and jump back in to tonight's episode of Critical Role. Critical Role! Thank you. សូវាប់បានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបា LAURA and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM And welcome back. That was good. That was.

Oh boy. So last we left off, the Mighty Nein had completed a number of ventures within the Dwendalian Empire since forming not but a few months before. Their friendship strengthened through victory and through loss. They've decided, after a few weeks of downtime,

to take on the next route of their journey. Of all the different avenues that had come to their attention, it was decided to make their way towards the Menagerie Coast to pursue some threads that seem to tie into some of the directions that Fjord would like to travel, as well as Jester returning to her home.

You bought some supplies, got your wagon prepared, and made a trip south through previous locations that you first made your way up north through, going to Alfield and drinking with Bryce, heading to Trostenwald and paying off the rest of the debt for the previous runner, Gustav, of the Carnival, of which had sparked this whole union of friends. Continuing southward past the Wu Yun Gate

and a brief encounter with two ettins, you manage to make your way to the Menagerie Coast itself, seeing the gorgeous shores, the eastern jungles, the waves in the distance, and on the way, actually purchased some pets as well from a traveling merchant caravan. It was a totally smart idea. What have we done?

You're going to be dead in a day. Best idea ever. Best. Oh! Oh, Jesus. What did he write? Why would you do this? Oh no. And you do that with blood on your hands. Blood on your hands. Terrible.

This'll work out way better than that Tamagotchi you wanted to do. So, Mighty Nein. We can just restart that. As you close the final miles to the outskirts, the northern side of Nicodranas, the first in one of the major port towns here in the Nazri Coast, what would you like to do?

What do you guys want to see? What do you want to do when we're here? We're here. What is there to do? Yeah, what is there to see? What's the main points of historical interest? I don't know a lot, but there's the Lavish Chateau. The Lavish Chateau?

Is that where your mom works? Yeah. Yeah, I want to see that. That's a tourist spot? Well, it's a really nice, it's an inn, you know? It is for me. And my mom performs there. It's really nice. It's one of those areas known for its entertainment. I mean, everybody's seen the ocean before, right?

No. Well, actually. Not now. No, I have never seen the ocean. Wait, one, two, three, never seen the water? No, not in Forn. Not in Forn, no. You should, it's amazing. I kind of want to see that.

I would really like to see that. Have you not either? Four? No, I've been landlocked my whole life, man. Wow. You guys are the only two. Like we're about to improve all of your general experiences in the world. I'm really excited.

It's really, it's the opposite of fire, Caleb. I do. It's really cool. Maybe we drive towards the coast and then, you know, take the PCH down to Nicodranas. What do you think? Sure. Yeah? Big Sur was the nicest time of year.

Yeah. Carmel by the Sea is a peach. I should probably keep myself disguised while we're here, though, just in case. Oh yeah, why exactly aren't you allowed back home? She's told us. Yeah, I pissed off that guy, and he said he would kill me. Oh, that's right,

he wants to kill you. Yeah. That's right. And does that mean that he would hire people to kill you, or he would personally kill you, or? No, I don't think, he didn't seem like the type that would really do a lot of killing himself, you know? But is wealthy and connected? Yes. Okay.

And there's a lot of people you can talk to here, you know? If you want to get somebody killed, here's the town to do it. You know, Jester, Caduceus looks awful confused. Maybe you could fill him in again about why you're being. Fjord, you don't remember. No, I do. I'm looking out for our tall cow friend. I told you all about it before we headed out.

I heard the whole story between games. I don't really, you should just know what I'm listening to. No, I know what's happening. I'm just trying to, you know, sorry. Scheduled tea break. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Yeah, no, I pissed off this guy. He was there to see my mom.

The Traveler was teaching me different spells at the time, you know, and I had just started learning about them. So I sort of made myself look like my mother. And I sort of- Have you tried to get with you? Well, I sort of lured him out onto the balcony. Oh, that's right, and embarrassed him. Yeah, he was just stuck out there, that's all. Locked him out. Yeah.

Oh right, without pants, right? Yeah. That's really funny. Do you remember his name? Yeah. What is it? Lord Sharp. Lord Sharp. Oh.

Is that a chosen name? Is he like an edgelord sharp? No, he was super not sharp. He was not, oh, he's dumb dumb. Well, he did get locked out on a balcony. Oh, you were talking about the mind. Yeah, sure. Did he just visit all the time,

or is he well known in Nicodranas for business, or? I don't know. Shady dealing. I didn't even know he was a lord. Oh, you just found out afterwards? So this was like a random hit. He was a random hit job for your Traveler shenanigans. Everybody was a hit job with me. Everybody.

Nobody made it out cleanly from that place. What about besides your mother's place of employment, do you know, are there other things to see? Well, all over the Opal Archways is really pretty. It's a great marketplace and stuff, lots of shops. I didn't see too much. From my window, you could see all the houses.

It looked like a quilt. It was beautiful with the roofs. You can see the ocean, it was kind of like, it looked kind of like a quilt. It was beautiful with the roofs. And you can see the ocean, so I know the wharfs are around there, you know? Yep, indeed. Okay. Well, should we go to some of your favorite places first? You want to see my room?

You want to go straight there? Well, we can go to the ocean first. The road down is treacherous. The benefit of being on the coast is that you limit your field of danger. It's only going to come from one direction. That's just something to keep in mind. That's a very fair point. Fjord, but what about all the sea monsters? Yeah, you definitely have sea creatures that haunt your dreams. Yeah, no, not true, actually. I have never seen.

You've tried sea monsters. Nope. You coughed up salt water. You haven't seen monsters. Nope. You coughed up salt water and you weren't even near the ocean. That feels like the ocean's real dangerous to me. That could be a pituitary thing. Right before I went to sleep. I have never seen a sea creature in my life.

There's so many. I saw a giant tentacle come out of the water. Right on the coast you saw that. Yeah, yeah. A tentacle came out of the water? I saw it from my window. It was a really, really, really big tentacle. Did you really?

Of course I did. Do I believe her? Make an insight check. Ooh, that's not terrible. Oh, that is terrible. 14. I really, really, really saw a tentacle. Okay. A really big one.

How close do we have to be to the ocean while we walk alongside it? Oh, I mean, as close as you want to be. If you want to put your feet in, it's an amazing experience, but. Oh, okay. I definitely want to do that. That sounds great. So it's colder than you might think.

I don't have any expectations, so I'm not sure if that's true or not. From where we are now, would I have any idea how far from the gates that we just, have we passed through the gates? You haven't made it to the gates of the city yet. You're probably about 20 or so minutes from reaching the exterior of Nicodranas.

If you were to head straight south, as opposed to continuing on the somewhat southwestern path towards the city, you would eventually hit the shoreline on just on the eastern side of the city for about 40, 45 minutes or so to get there. Oh, we're so close, we might as well stop in. Stop by the ocean? Yeah, well, or your mom's place,

whatever you want to do first. So is there a location to go to the ocean? Yeah, so I forget you haven't seen it. So if you look in one direction, right, and you look immediately to your left, and then immediately to your right, all that shit is ocean. Fuck. All of it. You see that line? The horizon?

Yeah. That's all ocean, too. That's crazy. It's really big. It's like a lake, only a lot bigger. I've seen big lakes, but you That's all ocean, too. That's crazy. It's really big. It's like a lake, only a lot bigger. I've seen big lakes, but you can always see the other side. Yeah, imagine not. Sometimes, okay, point stands. The water is not that greenish dark color.

It's really beautiful and light blue. See, I like these literal examples, because I've only read flowery poetry that just makes it talk about. Once we get over this next hill, you'll see the ocean. Let's go. Let's go. All right, so heading southward, deviating from the path that leads directly into Nicodranas,

the Mighty Nein makes their way southward towards the shoreline. A better part of an hour passes. You can see to the right the exterior walls of the city and beyond the somewhat light gray to white pattern walls. They may have been gray at one point, but the white pattern you can see across them seem to be layers and layers and years and years of seagull excrement having gathered stronger towards the southern side of the wall as you pass near that section of the city.

I cast Disguise off. Okay. What do you look like? Basically me only, like human. Okay, human Jester. All the same only, yeah. Blue skin gone. Blue skin's gone, horns are gone, no tail. That cute little bob.

Cute little bob, but it's black hair instead. So cute. Yes or no. Look like Catherine Zeta-Jones, Chicago. Super tan skin. Yeah. I love it. Okay, great. So continuing on this way, you begin to see the seagulls now.

New birds for a lot of you here. You can see these white going overhead as they begin to cluster and hit the shoreline. You see a few of them diving towards the water as you begin to look past the edge of the rock into the sandbank, and you can see, eventually, as your cart begins to make its way towards the rougher bit of terrain

before it breaks at the ocean, the actual waves now crashing up against the shore and pulling away. Pushing again. It's horrifying. What? It's everywhere. It's horrifying. What? It's everywhere. It is everywhere.

It's coming to get us. It's literally coming to get us. It stays right there, it goes in and then I'm definitely taking off my shoes. It comes towards us every 15 seconds or so. Yeah. It's so blue. Those are seagulls.

They are some dickheads. They will, if you leave food out, they'll snake that shit in a second. They make horrible noises. Yep. Oh yeah, yeah. And they drop shit on you from above, so keep your eye out. Most birds do that more.

These ones in particular are pricks. I join Caduceus in the water. Okay, yeah, looking past the afternoon sun, at this vantage point especially, you can see it dancing across the distant horizon shore, like hundreds of little glistening flecks of glass. The shore sound itself is very soothing. As you approach and pull up your pants

and take off your boots to begin to step into the soft sand, you can see large rocks that occasionally break up the beach itself, seem to jut outward. On these, you can see small carvings, you can see things that have been drawn on them with chalk, it looks like, that have been mostly washed away or eroded with time. As close as maybe 150 feet out,

you see a small fishing ship that is on the outskirts of the southern portion of the city. Glancing off to the right, to where the city docks begin, you can see dozens and dozens of ships that are in the middle of the harbor, that are just coming into the harbor, many that are in the process of being anchored that are just coming into the harbor, many that are in the process of being anchored and then set up within the docks themselves.

This eastern side, you recognize as the Restless Wharf of the city. You know the harbor is broken into two different sides. I'm going to take a moment to look through the sand and rocks and see if there's anything interesting. Make an investigation check. 15. Investigation? Wait, hold on.

Investigation. Yes. Never mind, that's a six. You find a lot of really soft sand. Okay. You start putting it into piles, and then you start building a cool little mound, and then a wave comes and destroys it, and you're a little sad, but that's how life works.

All the lessons. Make sense. Can I go out to the rocks and see how far I can hop along the rocks? Okay, yeah, there's the... Do you know how to swim, Beau? Yeah. Yeah.

So the rocks are most pretty disparate amongst the shore here. There is one section where you can see a string of four rocks at different heights that eventually get to about 30 or so feet out into the shore before they disappear beneath the ocean surface. So before you even touch the water,

you dive up to one of the rocks. As you get to the top, your hands hit there, and you can already see the top of the rock is just bleached white with seagull shit. But it's dry. Glancing over the side, you go ahead and make a leap to the next one, go ahead and make an athletics check.

Is there easy access to the water here? Yeah, you can just walk right into it. It's an open beach right here. 25. 25. You deftly leap from rock to rock until eventually you get to the final ones, maybe breaking about three or four feet out of the water,

and you're perched on it, looking out in the distance, and you can see the rolling waves coming in. You can see, just like that, yeah. It's a beautiful set, and you can see the sun maybe has a few more hours before it begins to become full dusk and the colors begin to shift in the sky, but for you having never seen the ocean, for many of you, it's serene, it's different, it's beautiful, it's warm, and Caduceus, as you put your feet into the water, it is quite cool. It isn't freezing. It's a comfortable temperate temperature.

You feel a sand grip and then slowly dissipate beneath your toes as you pull it in. It's a really unique sensation, and you can't help but be excited by it. Beau is going to sit. You're right, this is spectacular. All right, pretty nice. Soak it up, man. Beau is going to perch on the rock

and for the first time ever, willingly meditate. Ooh. While just focusing on the blue that she is now surrounded by. Okay. Caleb has just been staring for a while and is standing next to Nott, and he takes off every stitch of clothing and everything, except for one one thing and hands it to Nott and walks in.

Caleb's naked. Yes. Caleb slowly submerges entirely into the ocean. Walk out into it. Up to the neck or fully submerged? I keep going and eventually start floating on my back. Okay, and eventually you see Kel vanish beneath the ocean and there's a brief moment

of worry as a few seconds pass with no sight before you just see, boop, buoyantly finding his way to the surface. Is he not easy as pie? Mm-hmm. We can still see your weenie! I can see it! I think his ears are underwater. I'm going to just nicely fold his clothes and put it on a nearby log or something.

Okay. Then I'll pull up my cloak of elvenkind and put out a couple of pieces of meat, because Fjord told me that seagulls come for food, and I'll hide and have my crossbow out. Yeah! Just when you're ready to go. Okay. I'm not stubborn. As you crouch down, you notice the clothing

replaces Caleb against the shift. Moving slowly to one side. Are you trying to prank Caleb? I will not stand for that. Well, I'll go fetch it. Pick it up. You pull it up and you see beneath it a large sand crab that emerged from underneath it,

looks up at you with those two small black beady fur-like eyes and claws. I'm trying to grab it. Make a dexterity check. Oh god. Yes, yes. Ooh, not good. Dexterity check 11. 11, it rolled exactly an 11 on its dexterity check. Oh god, yes, yes. Ooh, not good. Dexterity check 11. 11, it rolled exactly an 11 on its dexterity,

so you manage to just capture it, and it's now going to attempt to snipe you. That's a 17 to hit with the end of the class. Your thumb clamps down, and there's an immediate flash of pain through your body. I have so much blood! You're trying to shake it off, it's still just flipping back and forth,

holding on tightly. I will, I'll try, I'm going to go down on it with my knee, like jump up and knee down on it. Okay, go ahead and make an acrobatics check. Okay. Ooh, not good! 10. Getting your ass kicked.

10. On a crowded acrobat. Thankfully it rolled lower than you. Because I wouldn't have... It takes you a little bit of effort. It takes you out two or three leaps because it keeps skittering out of the way and you're not about to be bested by a small crustacean.

For the third try, you manage to get just enough leverage as you push into the air and with one resounding crack down through its external shell, it releases its grip somewhat on your thumb. You have to actually pry it off. It seems to be locked into its death grip. You fought bravely. More bait.

I'll just break a bunch off the crab and put it out. Okay. Go back to my perch. Over the next 10 minutes or so, you watch as one snake comes down, eat and grabs it. About 25 of them suddenly descend as word gets out, and you're just surrounded by white birds.

We'll say for the sake of narrative, you managed to pick off about eight of them before they ended up scattering away from it, and you just have this beach riddled with dead seagulls with crossbow bolts out of their bodies. I'll retrieve the crossbow bolts and that's it. Okay. You just leave them there? No, no, I'm going to take the bodies, too.

I have a question right now. Where is the Lavorregard Menagerie? What? Oh, the pets. Where is the owl, the weasel? Oh, no, no, no. I have Nugget with me, weasel's little sprinkle.regard Menagerie? What? Where's the owl, the weasel? I have Nugget with me, weasels, little Sprinkle. Owls with you? Owls by the cart. We need constant updates to where these animals are.

No, no, Sprinklus is here. That's the weasel? Yes, Sprinklus. Like on a donut. We did some training on the road. Yeah, and I want to play fetch with Nugget here at the beach. Go ahead and roll.

If you guys are doing some training, what are you training him in? I want to train Nugget to blink back to us. On a command? It's going to take you a couple hours of working with him here on the beach, but you can do that. Go ahead and make an animal handling check.

Oh god, oh god. I'm so scared. Say goodbye to that King Charles beard. 17. Pretty good. Okay. So utilizing bits of the feed and the snacks that you had purchased off of the original vendor with Sprinkle tucked up on your neck, and they're focused on their various endeavors, Jester is just tunnel vision focused on this adorable little blink dog.

To look at it, you can see the fur is a light tan color with bits of faintly darker brown stripes and a hint of calico elements to its coat, but very, very faint along the back. Oversized puppy paws that look soft and goofy, but the limbs themselves, you can already see, are a little unnaturally angular for a natural dog. You can see some of its fey nature peeking through in its features. Its ears are

very tall and pointed, though white at the base. As you start teaching it to blink, you watch as it prepares each time, as it begins to figure out the commands and what you're trying to guide it, the eyes begin to go from a dark, dark black to a bright blue right before it blinks over here and the eyes fade from blue to black as soon as it manages to find its next location. Over the next two hours or so of you working with this, you begin to eventually develop the early stages of finding ways to command it to teleport when you want it to, though you can't really guide where it's going to teleport yet, but you've learned a command or a whistle of your choice

that will tell it to blink. I'm so happy. This is so wonderful. Can't wait for this to go wrong. So you get to decide on that. If she has ten gold pieces worth of incense, she can just bring it back to the owl. No. Nope.

Did you name your owl? I did. What did you name your owl? It says Professor Thaddeus. Well, yeah, sure. He looks like a professor. Exactly. He looks like a Thaddeus. I couldn't decide if he looked more like a professor or more like a Thaddeus, and then I realized. Why not both? professor. Exactly. He looks like a Thaddeus. I couldn't decide if he looked more like a professor

or more like a Thaddeus, and then I realized. Why not both? Exactly. Do you meditate for the full two hours that she's training the blink dog, or do you return to Professor Thaddeus? No, Beau could not meditate for two hours. No. Fair enough. I meditate for like 10 minutes.

Yeah, tops, and then go back and I just want to train Professor Thaddeus to come when I look regal and hold out my arm. Okay, so you stand about 50 yards from the cart and hold aloft your forearm and attempt to find a way to coax Professor Thaddeus. Professor! Go ahead and roll an animal handling check.

Professor, come. Offer it tenure. Exactly. Nobody else? That's pretty good. Trying to leave it alone. 21. Why not?

I rolled a natural 18, 21. Okay, 21. So over the next hour, hour and a half or so, you realize that your owl won't just come to you. You begin to find, coaxing it with pieces of meat that you can scavenge from the remnants of the meal. Can I have a gold? I want a seagull! Thank you.

You're waving the seagull. Seems a bit large, but eventually, smaller pieces, you begin to realize, can coax it and you can get it to come to you when you have a piece of food in your grasp. You're so moody. Mr. Owl, how many handling checks does it take? Oh, wow.

One, two, three. Owls are dicks? Yeah. You've begun the process of forming some sort of a bond with your animal. I'm going to take a minute to try and explain to the professor what a doctorate is. Okay.

If he's confused. No, I just nod and hope Thaddeus is listening. Yeah, Thaddeus seems to already have a stronger bond with Caduceus than you. Okay, stop talking to my owl. All right. While this chaos is happening with Caduceus slowly wading through the shoreline, Caleb floating in the distance, practically nude,

not diminishing the population of the various waterfowl, and those two training their pets. What are you doing, Fjord? You sure you don't want to come in? I'm sure Jester will hold your hand or something. That sounds lovely, but I think I'll just watch from the shore. Okay.

I'll walk up to the shore and just go ahead and put my boots and ankles deep in the water and just stand there. Then I'll summon the falchion next to my side. Okay. As the falchion emerges from whatever pocket space it resides, when not in use, there's a splash of ocean water across the ground

flung from the the faint bit of force that is released upon its summoning. As you hold it in your grasp, and hold it before you, looking at it for a moment, the sunlight gleaming off the blade, showing the intricacies of its curvature, of the Fao-Chin Summer's Dance mutation that has come from the consuming of the blade not long ago.

It feels cold. Same temperature of the ocean that you're currently sitting in, and as the temperature of the ocean warms to your touch, so does the temperature of the blade you're holding. Hmm. I see, how far out is Caleb in the water? I'd say he's about 15 feet out, not too far. Can I use Misty Step to appear right next to him

in the water and scare the shit out of him? Yes, you may. Caleb, as you've been lying there, looking up into the beautiful blue sky with faint tufts of white drifting by, but mostly this unending sphere of blue color before you. Boosh! Fjord appears, a shadow above you looming in the water.

Shies a . Whoa, whoa, hey, hey, all right there, chief. Okay, all right, you're good, sorry. You can't just sneak up on a person. Sorry, I just figured you want some company. It's really tranquil, isn't it? Ah!

Yeah, it's very quite nice. Yeah, you seem very at home in the water, I'm surprised. I duck down four feet. Caleb? Well, no, I'm just submerging in my bits. I must commend you, a lot of people are very trepidatious in the face of a force of nature like this. Oh, it's expansive.

It just keeps going forever. You took to it very well. Why did you leave it? Oh, I didn't leave it intentionally. I tried to make my way back up north to see if I could learn more about the sword and everything, but I've always loved the water, yeah. So it feels good to be back here.

It does, yeah. I would live right on the water if I could. Yeah. So maybe you stay? Yeah, yeah. I take care of what I need to take care of. I think a calm life on the water would suit me just fine. As a unique visual perspective here, too,

as Caleb is no longer just floating buoyant, but who has probably not had too much experience swimming in the past, is having to haphazardly thrush. 15 feet out? Huh? 15 feet out? Those sandbars are unpredictable, man. They drop right the fuck out. 15 feet out is far in an ocean.

It's closer to 20, we'll say. All right. Enough to the point where you can submerge and touch your feet underneath. But to stay above the water, you're just talking as you thrash. The toe touch every once in a while. Fjord is gently buoyant, occasionally,

just putting the hands in the water, the armor itself keeping you mostly aloft by its enchantment, and you just being comfortable in the water, it's Fjord looming over as you're just keeping up with him best you can. It's like us when we went scuba diving. I take a moment and scan the beach and call out, Not the Brave! Live up to your name and jump in the ocean!

Yeah. There's no karma, there is no karma! You are not the brave. Live up to your name and jump in the ocean. There's no karma, there is no karma. Is that it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so big. There is a karma, there is a karma. I know what I'm talking about, get in there. Who cares?

Go swimming. Give me a minute, I just ate some seagull. I need to wait a half hour. That's her wife's tale, it's not true! I think it's true, I'm cramping. I'm cramping already. It could be the crab that bit me. What is it with Nott in the water, do you have any idea?

I don't know. She doesn't have any idea? I don't know. She doesn't like to swim, I don't think. But you would imagine seeing something like this would maybe give perspective. Oh yeah, I'm going in. Forget this. Yeah, as you guys are having this discussion, you watch as this beacon of pink hair

emerges from the water next to you. This smells weird. I really like it. One of those sea monsters they were talking about. It might be, yeah. I think that might have been the tentacle that Jester saw from it. You have not seen the ocean. Never before.

It's pretty amazing, isn't it? It's amazing. You're actually in for, this is a treat. The sunsets are gorgeous here. Oh man, I can't even imagine. Should we stay here for the night? No! Can we camp on the beach?

I have the tent. I want to see my mom, though. I think we can camp on the beach before we leave town, but if people are anxious to get business done. I mean, I can go see my mom alone. No, no, no, we're going with you. What about tomorrow? Do you want to go tomorrow?

Does she know you're coming? I cast Sending. What are you doing? Hey, Mom. Who are you talking to? I'm sort of in the water, at the beach right now. We're not in the water. Eyes closed. But I was wondering if you're singing tonight

or if you're singing tomorrow? As you continue talking, the voice creeps through and goes, Chester, I only received a portion of what you were saying, but I am singing tonight. Are you nearby? My mom is singing tonight, you guys. Oh, then we should leave the beach

and go to where she is singing. Agreed. She doesn't sing every night, you know, so if we miss it, we might miss it for a while. Is she, what night of the week, is this a headlining prim every night, you know, so if we miss it, we might miss it for a while. Is she, what night of the week, is this a headlining primetime night, or does she get the off nights and matinees? No, it's kind of like a special occurrence

when she ever walks. Oh, really? We're very fortunate, then. It also occurs to me this is an eastern ocean, isn't it? So it would be a sunrise or it would be a sunset for this ocean? Oh, you're right. No, this side of the coast, it would be... Sunrise.

Because where you are in the ocean, it'll be setting on the west. Oh. Yeah. Which, we have more than one sun, though, right? There's multiple suns in the sky? Oh, yeah. You have multiple moons. Get the map!

Where's the map? We need an orrery now to figure this out. I'm very excited. Yeah, the sun, from the Menagerie Coast, the sun does set in the ocean. Cool, cool. Okay, okay, okay, okay. West Coast. Oh yeah, that's right. Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Okay, okay. West Coast. Well, we should definitely go see Jester's mom. Oh, without a doubt. Yeah. Listen, the ocean will be here. We've got plenty of time to come back and fish. Oh good! All sorts of stuff. Oh good, we can come back then later, that's great.

I know, I can feel the disappointment. Because I didn't make it in today! Yeah, I know. But hey, it's just like the anticipation keeps building, right, and then payoff. It'll be that much more special. Maybe we can buy some new swimwear while we're in town. Oh, yeah.

Or any swimwear. Because I think your bandages might come off in the water. Use floaties. Yeah. Oh, yeah. They will help me. Yep. They'll sink you like a stuff. You also have that fabulous ring.

You could just walk out onto the ocean. I know, but I don't know how that works on moving water. I think I know. Maybe you should find out. Or do it. It seems like it could be. I'm potentially hilarious. Do it. Yeah. If we want to get a good seat, though,

I feel like we should leave now. I need to be up front because I can't see over people. That is true. So we should probably get going. Fair enough, it is getting dark. Let's dry off and get our clothes back on and get moving. As you guys gather your things, dusk has set in and now the sky shifts from light blue

to a deep blue and purple on the eastern side as the oranges and reds and yellows and pinks begin to overtake the western side of the skyline. That's really beautiful. That's amazing. Do you do this every night? Yeah. Wow. Yeah, I feel a little rubbed.

It's just gray and rainy where I'm from. All the time. Guess you should have come here sooner. Yeah. But you get amazing storms, right? Thunder, lightning. Yeah. Yeah. It's a give and take trip. A lot. It gets foggy here sometimes. Yeah. Yeah. It's give and take.

That's right. A lot. It gets foggy here sometimes. Oh. We have fog. Oh, well. The closest thing I've experienced to this is inside Jester's backpack. In the dodecahedron.

Oh. I thought you just meant the abyss of my backpack. That's exactly what I thought, too. There was a lot of baked goods in there, yeah. It is pink. The ocean is like a pile of donuts. No, it's just a... Are you high?

Are you high on the ocean? That's just the jellyfish sting taking effect. No, it's a good day. How long of a drive is it, a ride, a cart ride, is it to the... We're 30 minutes away from the track. Oh yeah. Are we 30 minutes away?

Well, are you heading back to the main road, to one of the entrances to the eastern gate of the city, or are you heading towards the coastline to the actual wharf itself? That's up to you. Whatever way is faster. Probably the wharf. Let's do the wharf. Roll a research charge. So you head along the coastline, eventually finding your way to where the wall itself slowly diminishes and steps. It does extend out into the ocean. There is no direct path

where you can walk along the shore and go into the city. It is specifically marked off, but there is an archway there that is gated by two of the guards that are in the city. I cast Disguise Self before we get up there. Okay. You do see about six Zalezo that are currently guarding that entrance. The rest of you see what appear to be armored guards,

varying from the scale mail and the maroons and muted colors of the townsguard you're used to seeing in the Empire. Here, the Zalezo have a blue and green base, but you can see along the armor, each individual Zalezo has their own unique decoration and flair to it, some way of customizing it, making their own. And as such, even within their own ranks,

there is a sense of color and individuality and just their own armored senses. But that doesn't mean they're not still armed and wondering who the fuck you are as you approach the exterior of the city. As your car begins to approach, you can see four of the six Selezo immediately raise their weapons, car begins to approach, you can see four of the six of leso

immediately raise their weapons, they begin to approach. Halt! What is your business in Nicodranas? We came to see the Ruby of the Sea perform tonight. The one at the front, you can see beneath his helmet, which has these two bits of chainmail

that curl open like curtains on the east side of his face. He pulls them out of the way and looks forward towards the rest of the crew there. You can see his darker skin and his thick brow. It's almost like a unibrow that sits over this sun-dried lips that are a bit cracked and parched. He glances forward, looks over at the rest of you and goes, The Ruby of the Sea? Yeah. Make a persuasion check. I'll use the red dice for the ruby.

15? 15, got it. All right, and where do you hail from? We hail from Portamali. No, it's not, it's up there. Oh. Portamali is from the other side. Oh shit. It's fine.

All right, it's roundabout, and you are? I am... All right, it's roundabout, and you are? I am... Fiona Fancypants. Theater critic. Theater critic extraordinaire. You never get a deception check. That fell out of my hand, that doesn't count. Oh, it's the same roll! Shit!

Seven! He looks back to the rest of the Zala's Owl and they discuss for a moment for themselves. Well, I apologize, but there is no entry after dark on this side of the wharf regardless. If you want to enter, you have to enter from the main gates. Oh no, but she's performing soon, and we're going to miss it if we go all the way around.

Well, they'll have to find some way to make it through the gate. And he just holds his hand out. Here we go, we need some money. Let's see how much I have. I have five gold to put in his hand. Do you put five gold in his hand? That's a lot of gold, isn't it?

I don't know anymore. I don't know! Here we go! He shakes in his palm. Very well, let them in. Stands aside. They have a portcullis that is just held up by some sort of chain mechanism that is beyond the wall. They step aside and let you in.

They usher you through quickly, because nobody's supposed to come through this entrance. But they go through. As they all walk by, you can see them all looking each of you up and down, taking a mental note of what you have on you, who you are, what you look like, as well as what they perceive to be inside the cart.

A few strange faces at the cluster of creatures around Jester and the rather disinterested-looking owl that is clutching the forearm bracer Beauregard. But you pass through this archway on the exterior wall and immediately look before you and you can see the eastern side of the harbor here and what is known as the Restless Wharf. Restless Wharf.

Immediately before you, you can see a plethora of people that are just walking along this heavy dockside harbor. There are a number of warehouses and small huts and buildings that are built both on the dock and built along the side of where it adjusts from stone and sand into wood and elements that turn into the docks themselves.

You can see tall cranes made of wood and cord and rope that some of them 10 feet, some of them 25, 30 feet or so, are in the process of either loading or offloading various materials from the trade ships that are making their way into Harbor or loading up to leave in the morning. You see two or three larger guild buildings

that tend to be the hubs of information for those that are coming from the docks. You can see there are a few dockmasters that are walking around, who are in the process of taking down information of who it is that's entering or exiting with their ships, making sure that everything is being handled. You see a number of Zalezo that are also keeping a close eye.

Torches are now lit as the sky grows darker. You can see there's one that's going through the city and is lighting the actual lanterns, the oil lanterns that hang on these tall, thin poles that dot the city that have to be lit at dusk. You can see... that dot the city that have to be lit at dusk. You can see, one thing that does catch your eye is right towards the center of this harbor where the Restless Wharf would be transitioning

into what you know as the open quay, which is the other half of this harbor, there is a massive lighthouse that sits on this one bit of rock that protrudes where the docks come to an end and just an element of the stone floor continues out before breaking off into a shelf into the ocean below. You can see this beautiful lighthouse. This lighthouse is famous.

You know it's known as the Mother's Lighthouse. It catches your attention specifically, Caduceus, because the beautiful design of this lighthouse, while it seems natural and just a gradual tower-like point on the backside, on the northern side, the southern side that faces the ocean, there is a 20-foot relief of what appears to be the upper torso of a woman

that is emerging from the lighthouse looking out over the ocean. A beautiful sculpture with wild hair that tangles and curls around the shoulders and then merges in with the stonework of this lighthouse. But what's unique is the way the lighthouse itself is placed as it rotates and as the light beacon comes across, you watch as the eyes of the woman flare up

as the light passes that side of the tower. You recognize, the closer you get to this area, this large sculpture is that of the Wild Mother of Melora. That is where the Mother's Lighthouse title comes from. How long has it been here for? As long as I've been alive. I don't know. That is how long again? You don't know how old I am, Caleb?

No, I do. I thought it would have been obvious. And I turn around and look. All right. That's beautiful. So as you guys are making your way through the Restless Wharf, you're getting odd looks from the side of various sailors and dock hands that are just curious

as to who you are and how you've made your way here. Are you heading directly to? Okay, so that being the case. This is all very familiar to me. Yeah, you've spent a bit of time here. You've been here before? Yeah. How long have you, when did you meet each other? You and Jess?

Well, just on our way up into. Yeah, a few weeks before he does. You were near each other for a while and didn't know each other? Well, he grew up in a whole different city. I'm from Port Damali, but I had seen her a couple times in the city. Well, only after I left here. Yeah. It's a different city. I'm from Port Damali, but I had seen her a couple times in the city.

Well, only after I left here. How far is Port Damali from here, roughly? Port Damali, excuse me. It's about a little over 400, 450 miles from here. It's quite a distance. It's on the other side of the relationship. Yeah, it's along the Menagerie Coast, Port Damali is the westernmost port city,

which is why it's the largest here. It's the major hub of trade between all the western bits of civilization, Tal'Dorei, Marquet, Issylra, with the port town of Nakedranas being the furthest east. So the two of those mark the two end points, the bookends of the Menagerie Coast. There are a few of the port towns Nicodranas being the furthest east. The two of those mark the two end points, the bookends of the Menagerie Coast. There are a few of the port towns in between,

but they're smaller by comparison. Nicodranas is about half the size of Port Damali. As we're walking through, to make it to Jester's mom's place, any familiar faces, catching eyes? Make a perception check. Nine. Nine. Faces, catching eyes. Make a perception check. Ugh, nine. Nine.

I mean, everyone seems to be going about their business. You are drawing some attention from folks as it is their job. There are a few Zalazzo that just keep an eye as you pass by. You see one male dwarf figure that appears to probably be the wharf master who has a number of people talking to him

and watches you pass by and as he does, so he just scribbles something in a book and then goes about his business, but that's the most you notice. So as you pass beyond the rest of this wharf, heading northwest into the city, eventually the hustle and bustle of the docks begin to fade, the warehouses begin to

slowly diminish their overtaking of the central business area of the city. You come upon what looks to be a large, 15-foot tall stone archway. It's a gradual arch as opposed to being straight and then turning over. It's this slow, gradual arch there with what looks to with a large gem that is embedded at its peak, at its zenith.

Opal Archway. Opal Archway. There are 11 of these throughout the district. One of the Opal Archways? Mm-hmm. Wow. These, if you were to recount what information of history you know about the city here, the Opal Archways once marked the, goddammit.

No, no, you go. I'll just repeat it. There you go. No, they once marked the exterior of the original city. I will fucking kill you. Never mind, you don't get lore. No! I can give and I can take away. But no, the Opal Archways marks what were the original boundaries Go on, do it. But no, the old archways marks

what were the original boundaries of the city when it was first founded. The city has expanded far beyond that, but that now marks the richer, most lively district where a lot of the political elite, where a lot of diplomats and the wealthy merchants come to either live and or spend their money. So as you pass beyond this archway,

the original occasional set poles that hold the oil lanterns that give the faint bit of flickering firelight through these dark, cobblestone streets give way to what appear to be much more vibrant, magical baubles that hover about 10 feet above the air. They've already been set, and you see them give off a brighter glow, and their colors seem to shift.

One of them has a whiter color, but then slowly turns to an orange, then shifts to a green, and then about 10 feet away, on the other side of the street, you see another one that's colors are shifting, but in a different pattern. They're complementing and also contrasting each other. At this point, too, you begin to see the streets, while not as crowded as the wharf, people that are here are much

better dressed. You see a carriage make its way by to your right, and you see a few folks that are pretty well-dressed nobles of some kind wearing a crushed silk type clothing that is bright blues and purples and jewelry of all sorts of gems and colors. As compared to a lot of the drab decor that a lot of the noble families seem to wear in your experiences up in the Empire here, the cultural mishmash that tends to build here on the coast over time with so many people

coming from so many places. It all has built this mixing pot of styles and ideas and self-expression, and it immediately is visible in the people that live here. You do notice, strangely, that there are a few townsguard amongst the Zalazzo here. Townsguard? Crownsguard? Crownsguard.

Crownsguard? Crownsguard of the Empire. Oh, but we'reguard of the Empire. Oh, but we're not in the Empire. Correct. Do they look like they're working, or do they look like they're... They look like they're keeping an eye out, and you two have had the experience here.

Crownsguard do have a small presence here. Because Nicodranas is the closest to the Empire, it's also the crossover point where the two entities, the Clovis Concord that oversees the Menagerie Coast and the Durnalian Empire make their laws and agreements and all of their essential intent to not attack, undermine, or destroy each other takes place. So while the laws of the Clovis Concord are enforced here,

technically the Crown's Guard can enforce Imperial Law if they were to see anything that does break Imperial Law. However, their presence is much thinner than anywhere else in the Empire, and it's more of a courtesy given to them by the Concord to make them feel more comfortable in a city that is closest here. And that's largely why the city here in Nicodranas

is considered a popular escape for those who want to get out of the way. It's the Vegas of the Dwendalian Empire, where it's close enough they can go travel to and still enjoy a bit of comfort and some semblance of home and places, but it's still different and alien and unique enough to the point where it feels like a vacation.

We can tell from their posture that they're not on leave, they're actually there, what seems to be more on duty. They're more on duty, though you're not sure if it's just their own duty or if they've been given a, or if they've been given some sort of post specifically by whoever's paying them. Okay. But it does catch the rest of you

who aren't familiar with this site a little off guard and you adjust your posture and get it a little more of a naturally defensive position, just knowing that there is now two forces of law enforcement now looking through the streets of the archways. It's okay, most of the Crownsguard here don't really give a shit.

It's like when they get stationed out here, they're like, okay, okay, and they do the fun stuff, too. Got you. It is more of a cush posting. Do they give these postings to people who are fuck-offs, or do they give the postings to these people who are? No, they're pretty legit,

because honestly, this is where the bigwigs go, so they want the best, right? They're not going to take a bunch of jack-offs with them. Yeah, yeah. So there's a lot of people with jewelry around. I was just thinking, I felt a little underdressed. Should I steal some for you? Well, here's the thing.

You can steal stuff if you want not, but the laws are kind of enforced a little bit stricter here. Yeah, the Clovis Concord is kind of ironclad. It's some hefty penalties. Everything from stealing to murder, it puts you away for quite a while, and it's a hefty fine.

All right. I won't steal or murder, then. Just that whole spectrum in between, you can just fill in everything that happened in your mind. When I said those two, it applies to that shit as well. What else is there, really, between stealing and murdering? Arson?

Oh, oh, that's a good one. Kidnapping. Oh, right. Are we talking about things in between? Yeah. Or out of? Yeah, no, in between those two, yep. Because what about, like, mail fraud? Is mail fraud in there, or is it, Yeah, no, in between those two, yep. Because what about mail fraud? Is mail fraud in there, or is it lesser than stealing? That's the worst crime there is.

No one talks to anyone who commits mail fraud. You are all accomplices. I just want to point that out. Yeah, I could. When Caleb and I were in the clink, there was a guy in there who had committed mail fraud. Yeah. He was fucked up by every other prisoner in there.

They don't like him. Mocked for death. Don't fuck with the post, I'm sorry. No. That's sacred. We were the only two people in that cell. Don't worry. That is correct.

Still got salt water from where? Wow. I shouldn't have surprised you, man. I'm sorry about that. Shit. Yeah, that's on you, buddy. Sorry. You just got to nod like this.

In passing further through the Opal Archways district, you begin to hear the music of various street buskers and performers beginning to take to the roads. They have their own lighting arrangements and you see what looks to be a small, sort of a, how was I looking for it? A topped cart, a Vardo. Thank you.

A Vardo. It was right on the tip of my tongue. I know. It's the tip of mine, that's fair. Oh, I would have, it was right on the tip of my tongue. I know. It's on the tip of mine, that's fair. Well, it would be furious. Vardo tucked into one corner where you can see there is a small group of about four performers out there doing juggling acts.

It reminds you of the early days when you had first come across the carnival in Trostenwald. Most everyone in the street doesn't pay the mind. Occasional silver is tossed their way. Passing that still, you go by a building that catches your attention immediately. This gaudy, nearly a palace of an estate.

You see this large building, this white silk-draped, dull brass and orange-yellow stone, a sandstone-based construct of a building. You know this. You've passed it before, but you're uncertain. This is the Marquis de Maine. This is where the Marquis of the city lives. Yeah. Marquis of the city lives. Yeah. Marquis de Maine. Yeah. Even at a glance, you can see there's probably

well over 40 rooms within this establishment. You have a lot of visitors all the time. So it's like a big house, like a mansion? It looks like a small compound with three low towers, like four or five-story towers, two at the front and one towards the back that's taller than three. All one singular building. It looks like a palace, but small for a palace,

but too large for a mansion. It's that weird in-between state. A lot of money has gone into its construction, and the closer you get to it, you can see that maybe it's not in the best of upkeep, but what you do notice is that the presence of Zalazzo is very strong. There's probably about 20 or more Zalazzo that are in the process of just keeping an eye on the vicinity, walking around the boundaries of the exterior of the domain.

You can see eight or so that are just stationed at the domain, you can see eight or so that are stationed at the front, and a few that are walking along what looks to be the upper parapets or high walls, keeping an eye down on the street. Does this seem like the same amount that's always been there? Yeah, it can vary, but you get the sense, make a history check, actually.

13. 13. Yeah! You get the sense that there's probably a handful of diplomats that are staying there as guests, and that's why the guard is a little more heightened than normal. There's probably diplomats there tonight. Wartime.

Then as you curve around the bend of the exterior of the domain, you see before you what is considered the high end inn of the Opal Archways. You see this beautiful three-story thin, but very tall building of soft sky blue pigment that's been painted across the stone. In each window sill, you can see this gold-leafed wooden frame that, dangling from it, is a deep cerulean crushed velvet curtain that open up across glass windows

that appear to be stained glass and glowing from the inside, emanate this slightly shifting kaleidoscope of color from the inside out. The steps that lead up to the front double doors, which are currently open, emanate a very soft sound of music. A four or five piece band apparently playing

just gentle atmospheric music to the interior. This is a very familiar sight to you, Jester, as this is the Lava Chateau, this is where you grew up, this is your home. She hasn't started yet, you guys. I hear music, is that the warm up act? Sure, sure, sure, but if you told her you're singing, she hasn't gone yet.

Do we have to pay to get in, or is it? No, I never back to. Sure, sure, sure, but if you don't, you're singing she hasn't gone yet. Do we have to pay to get in, or is it? No, I never had to. Well, you lived there. So yeah, it's probably free. Is this a hotel? Yeah. You grew up in a hotel. Well, I mean, it wasn't a hotel to me. We had a lot of the top floor.

But under normal circumstances, because you look this way, but would everyone know you here? Well, I, you mean like as a human? Or would they know me as a me? As a, as a, as a me? As Jester, would they know you? Well, yeah, of course they would. But you don't want them to see you,

so how will we get in? Well, I'm disguised. I know, but how will we get in? Well, I'm disguised. I know, but how will we get in? What was your name again? Fiona Fancypants? Yeah. Okay, just Fiona. Okay. You know disguise self lasts an hour, right? Has it been an hour?

It's been over an hour, but I'll say that you've wrapped it up, but I'd say mark off two more first-level spell slots for the time it's taken to travel since you've arrived at the ocean. Since, wait. From traveling from the ocean to the city, then making your way through, it's been the better part of an hour,

so it'd be two spell slots. Okay. Okay. A little over an hour since you left the beach. I just recast it. Sure. Well then how are we going to get in? What do, then how are we going to get in? What do you mean, how are we going to get in?

We go in. All right. They don't know you, they know me. I'm going to disguise myself, too. Do they check weapons at the door or anything like that? From what you recall, they request weapons be noted. You can keep a weapon on your person

just as a means of self-defense, but you cannot come in fully decked out, ready for armor. You can have one small personal item on yourself as a means of self-defense. Everything else can be kept at a coat room at the entrance. You also do see two Zalezo that are stationed on either side of the open doorway. This is part of the protective presence here of the inn,

and the higher end customers that they see. Before entering, I would look for an alleyway in the last few minutes before getting here to make all of my clothes look, I cast Disguise Self upon myself, and don't change my appearance other than to make my clothes look brand new and slightly more expensive than they are.

All right, I may join you in that, if that's all right. By all means. I'll also humanize myself and put together something that looks appropriate for the sort of people I've seen walking around in all the pearlescent whites and greens. Make an intelligence check. Oh, this will go poorly.

I'm still very tall. No, I'm not. He can adjust his height. Yeah, one foot up and down. What? That's part of the disguise self ability that he has as a. I thought it was just a thing that he has. No, well, it's a racial trait of a fear ball.

Straight intelligence check. 14. 14, okay. You've taken a little bit of time to study the accoutrements and fashion of those around you in the city, specifically those that appear to be common denizens of Nicodranas. As you emerge with Caleb, you see Caleb in this beautifully clean, well-pressed coat with a higher collar, a wider sleeve end with cuff. You can see a bit of a cravat proofing from beneath.

A very nice presence. You see, with the same pink hair, how would you like to be dressed? Definitely the same pink hair, but tied back, this thin adult human man who's got a little bit of the scruff going into it, a bit of a shaggy goatee. If this is appropriate for it, a little bit of the French Restoration, but nice pale opalescent whites.

I just keep imagining Lord Strider. Oh my god. Okay, yes, that's fair., it's muted but fun. Muted but fun. I will also cast Disguise Self and turn into a female dwarf with just a simple moo moo. A simple moo moo. Don't insult my dignity, just give me the moo moo.

All right, so you almost look like one of the ghosts from Pac-Man. You're in charge. A blue muumuu. Okay, perfect. Was that Blinky? I think that was Blinky. As you approach and begin to step out of the cart,

you see a young human man, his early 20s or so. His hair gelled back, but it tends to curl up and poof a bit towards the base, around the sides of his neck. He's wearing a vest with a plain, but well-made silk white shirt and a pair of trousers. You recognize him as Tyrol. He is essentially the front hand of the inn.

As he approaches, he looks up to you. Are you leaving your cart here? Are you going to be staying? Yes, we're going to be staying here. All right, well, I will go ahead and see that this is taken care of. Please enter. Do you board animals?

We can. There is a charge. Cool. Here's the pigeon he's been eating. Seagull. Sorry, it's a seagull. He sets an arm on the railing of the stairway and the sign goes, Very well. I will see and tend to the horses and your hawk?

Professor. It's an owl. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. That sucks. What is that for? Other pets. No, that for? Other pets. No, that's for money. This is actually to pay for the service. Here, I pay him.

How much is it? He doesn't say. How much do you give him? For the service of boarding the animals? Boarding the animals and taking care of the cart. I give him five gold, because I saw Jester do that earlier and it seems to be the common courtesy of Nicodranas.

All right, he dropped five gold in his hand and his eyes go wide and he's like, of course, right this way. Is that a lot of money? It's a lot of happiness and that's okay. It looks like we're really well off, though. He seems to be immediately swallowing the pain from the talons that are grinding into his forearm

and is now smiling brightly and eager to please the new arrivals on the outskirts. There's more where that came from, you take good care of them. Just give them 600 dollars. Lighten up. Lighten up a bit. What about the other animals?

They're staying with me, I'm not giving these things up. We're walking in with a dog and a weasel? Well, the weasel is tucked in, so really no one will notice it. I can't. But yes, I'm walking in with a dog. Okay, okay. It's like a lap dog. My mama went to meet him.

Sure, okay. You know this better than me. Dog get pissed everywhere. No, blink dogs don't pee. Oh. It's a rule. It's canon. Have you named the weasel yet? She's saying there's a dark spot that's slowly spreading across.

You just said T-dog! You just said T-dog! His name is Sprinkle. Good. Sprinkle? Yeah. Sprinkle the weasel? It is male. Sprinkle the nugget and Professor Thaddeus. Excellent.

I named the seagull in my head, too. What's the name? Steven. It would be a I named the seagull in my head, too. What's the name? Steven. It would be a Steven. Steven Seagull. Oh! Yes! I got to keep it, I got to keep it.

Wow. So as your cart is taken care of, one of your animals has found a temporary companion. You make your way up the steps. The Zalazok just keep an eye and nod as you pass, walking into the interior. The warm light and music embrace you as you step within the lavish chateau.

The first thing you see are four chandeliers hanging from the ceiling in different quarters of this very tall chamber, about 15 or so feet from floor to ceiling. There are rafters that align a series of wide wooden bars that hang from right to left side. These chandeliers that hang from them appear to be made of a polished silver color

and on them hang about 20 or so candles per chandelier that are giving off this gently flickering warm light that trickles down into the main area. You see what appear to be two bars, one to the right, one to the left in the far corners, each being tended to by one bartender of some kind. You see a few servants that are jotting from table to table

on what looks to be about 10 or so tables. They're used to the dark wood taverns and the dives and various degrees. All the tables here have what look to be fine, either a very high count white cotton or a white dubione silk that is pulled across around these circular tables. Across them, there's a silver platter that contains candles,

fresh fruit, what appear to be almost like complimentary slivers of cheese and crackers that are set out there. There aren't a lot of people in here. There's maybe nine patrons that are currently in the tavern, but those that are in here are very well dressed. They look, they're clustered around three separate tables, three, three, and then,

it'd be three, three, and three, three different tables. I'm a heathen. What is Dippione silk? Dippione silk, it's a type of silk material that has an interesting texture to it. Okay. Okay. I'll show you the brim. I was just curious.

Yeah. It's really pretty. It's basically the nicest kind you can get. It's really fancy. You brought fabric samples. Is it like the velour juicy sweatpants that I saw when I first moved here? I'm on a clear-cut, dip-y, how do you spell dip? Diplo silk. Everybody at home takes out their swatch that they got. I'm on a clip, Diplo, how do you spell Diplo? Diplo Silk.

Everybody at home takes out their swatch that they got. It looks a little rougher than just smooth silk. It has a bit of a texture to it. It looks a little more natural. Legitimately just curious. Yeah, well, that's good. There you go. It's shiny.

Yep. Okay. It's shiny silk. You said with those nine people that are in the room, how many tables are there about? That's Dippione's, so I'll give you that. Yeah. Dippione, Bob Dippione. Exactly.

Dippione. You see ten tables in the room total. Ten tables. Yes. Though, you know, the clientele can shift based on time. And as you enter and look around, you see on the far end, there is a single staircase, a wide 10-foot staircase

that ascends up towards the back wall and then splits on two different sides into two separate staircases that ascend to the second level. Along that, you can see the lighter wood itself, and all the wood appears to be painted here in a faint gray or a very light tan color. There is a carpeting that is draped over the center, The lighter wood, and all the wood appears to be painted here in a faint gray or a very light tan color. There is a carpeting that is draped over the center,

about eight foot wide down the staircase that is a similar kind of light blue color as the paint on the exterior of the building. Isn't it pretty? It's beautiful. I used to run up and down these stairs late at night. Can you remind me, so I don't call her Mrs. Ruby, Pretty? It's beautiful. We used to run up and down these stairs late at night. Can you remind me, so I don't call her Mrs. Ruby, what's your mom's name?

What do we call her, Miss Lavor, Mrs. Lavor? Or Marion. Marion? Mm-hmm. Okay, Marion. Is blue the predominant color here? On the exterior, yes. On the interior, it's a light tan and medium wood tint with whites and gold and silver. Blue on the outside, interesting.

Fiona, do you recognize anyone in this room? Yeah. You do? I do. Sure, I recognize that bartender, and that bartender, and all of these patrons. The patrons, anybody that? Yeah, a couple of them have been upstairs, if you know what I mean.

I know what I mean. Her mother is a lady of the night. Ah, oh, oh. The lady of the night, if you will. She's the best lay ever. Yeah, and considering that she's singing tonight, it seems really empty in here. What's that about?

Maybe it's a private show. She doesn't do that. It would cost a lot of money. Well, maybe it wasn't publicized. Maybe it's a surprise drop-in show. What? As you guys have begun taking, standing in the middle of the foyer area,

you're pushed ahead a bit by another group of about four individuals. They look to be merchants, well-dressed for the occasion. They push past, excuse me, and they go and find another table. You get the sense that the room probably is going to be filling up. We should probably get the table as soon as possible.

Where's the backstage door? Where do I get to my mom? Your mom actually descends for a performance, so you'd have to go upstairs. I want to go upstairs. Okay, just you? Yeah. All right, so you guys all find a table?

Sure. Is it better near the front or in the back? She comes down from those stairs. Yeah. Make sure you got a good view of that. We'll get as close to the stairs as possible. Okay, so you guys all find a table. You listen to the stairs. The normal route that you're used to taking,

which is curving to the right as the stairs split towards the second floor. There you can see on the brief landing before it goes up to the second floor, there is another Slezo guard who's just stationed there, keeping an eye out, looks to you, nods. You run up to the secondary floor,

where there are a number of various rooms for the inn that are for rent. You head up the next flight of stairs. You can see as they both meet, there's a second flight that mirrors the bottom floor, parallel on the floor upward. That one splits again to the top floor in there as you get to the third and final floor of the chateau. On the left side, there are a number of indoors,

but there is one doorway that is made of a different wood grain than the rest of them. It was a gift from a very interested suitor years ago, and it's been installed, but it marks the chamber where the Ruby of the Sea makes her home, and for most of your life until recently, you made yours. I promise. I go up to it, I go up to it!

Okay, go up to the door. We stand downstairs. Yeah, we're all. I'll buy the group a round. Aw. You can hear, muffled through the doorway, a little bit of practice singing, some scales. La la la la la la la la. You hear other voices talking,

and there's some rustling moving through, and someone seems to stub a toe and go, Ow! What time? There's a few other people rushing around in there. I knock on the door and say, Good evening, Marianne Lavorre. The Little Sapphire has come to see you.

There's a pause. Little Sapphire. Then there's a step at the door, and the door creeps open, and you can see one of the servants who works within the chateau, an older woman in her 40s or so, human, with very short, crimped, dark hair, who generally helps prep your mother,

helps her get dressed, and helps get her prepared for the performance, advances past. Her name is actually, I think it's Nadeen. She peeks through, looking at you. I'm terribly sorry, what did you say? I'm here to see the Ruby of the Sea. Unfortunately, she is going to be performing shortly. I know, I know, I know, I know, tell her that I'm here.

I am, she is not taking any sort of customary The little sufferer's here to see you, Ruby! You hear a voice from behind her go, I'm sorry, what? From peeking over the shoulder, as your vision focuses into the chamber beyond, low-lit beyond just a series of candles that are set around the single mirror,

you see the beautiful red skin of your mother and the dark hair tumbled past the shoulder as she's been wearing a mostly laced up bodice as the other servant is in the process of lacing and tying it, glances over her shoulder, pushes past the edge of the chair and goes, It's me! You see her smile brightly, her faintly white glowing hint of yellowish gold into her eyes brighten immediately.

He goes, Well, come in, come in. Please, close the door for me. Excuse me, Nien. Nien closes the door and goes, I'm very confused by this, Mistress, but whatever you require. At which point, the other one is lacing, is still pulling on the back of the bodice,

and without even looking at her, Marianne pushes her aside and goes, Shh! You run for it and give her a big hug. Okay, as you give her a hug, she holds you there and goes, Um, I... You look different.

It's a spell. I'm actually still me, don't worry. There's a nod, and their tension in her body melts as her arms enclose on your shoulders and back and pulls you in close in this moment of warmth and relief that washes over both of you at being reunited here in this chamber. The two servants sit in their back awkwardly, not quite understanding entirely either,

and whispering to each other, while Marianne continues to hold you and rock you back and forth, and she goes, My beautiful Jester, I've missed you so much. Missed you so much, I missed you so much. I wanted to come home sooner, but we got distracted because we went to the Empire. Right, I remember you telling me you were going to go there.

Well, that's right, I sent you messages. I see. Yeah. How was it? I have not traveled beyond the boundaries. It's really kind of cold, and the people are pretty strict, but there are some really, really nice people that you can meet.

They met a lot of friends. You should meet them. I'd be happy to. You're downstairs. She traces her fingers along her face and goes like, Here. I put her hand on my horn so she can tell it's still there. She feels it and she's like,

Can I see my little girl? Is it okay with them? They're fine. You drop the illusion, and even though she knew, it wasn't until actually she gets an opportunity to look upon your face and your hair and your eyes and your smile that you watch just life breathe in like a renewed fire into the chest of your mother.

Immediately, she grabs the sides of your cheeks and pulls you in and goes, I've missed you so much. And just brings you in and kisses you on the forehead and starts running her fingers through your hair. Oh, careful of the weasel. His name is Sprinkle Mama. He's very adorable. I'm going to say I left Nugget downstairs with you guys.

Okay, okay, okay. After he beat on you? Yeah. She immediately starts brushing your hair with her fingers on the side, and is like, you've gone so far and traveled so much, you have to tell me about what you've done? I will, of course.

Do you want me to finish lacing you up your performances tonight? Yes, it is. Please, do not mind. She knows what to do. So now in front of the mirror with you behind her, she's looking at you through the mirror over her shoulder as you're helping lace up the back of her bodice.

We went to a town and it was burned down and we killed a bunch of gnolls and we took off their ears and then we went to another city and we fought these fish people in this swamp and it was really crazy and then, oh my gosh, you should meet this monk girl that I know. She's crazy, and she fights with her fists and also with a staff, and she's really strong.

There's this other girl who has wings, and they tell a lot about their lives. She's just enthralled, just listening to all this. I would never have thought my little Jester would be seeing the world and fighting creatures. Fighting so much, you should see how strong I've gotten. I want to see how strong you've gotten. Well, I mean, okay, do you want me to punch you? Perhaps wait till after the performance.

I've just applied my, anyway. At that point, she stands up and Nadeen puts the rest of her dress on and it's this beautiful, deep purple satin-type material. It's low cut, this beautiful long training sleeve that hangs down past her knees when her arms are at her side, puts on her necklace,

what looks to be a faint velvet choker that pulls across the back of the neck there and in the center is a small blue gem that she keeps to remind herself of you. She takes a moment to look in the mirror and, well, how do I look? You look beautiful, Mama. Then perhaps you should go join your friends.

Oh, right. I can't disguise myself anymore, though. Can I borrow a cloak or something? Perhaps. You can technically spend higher spell slots to cast a lower level spell. Shit. If you want to.

Okay, that's all that I'll do. I'll cast it again. Okay. We're going to see a show. What could happen? What could happen? All the spell slots. Okay. And they run backats. Okay.

And they run back down the stairs. Okay, you run back downstairs to join the rest. All right. We saw Caduceus, yeah. Yeah, all right. She's almost ready, she's almost ready, she's so beautiful! That's great. Was she happy to see you?

Yeah, yeah, no, of course she was. Was she, is she going to give us a place to stay tonight? Sure, yes, of course she is. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. While we've been sitting down there, any, I have not disguised the way I look,

any glances, looks, anybody we recognize, anybody lingering on us? In the 15 or 20 minutes or so that Jester's been gone, the rest of the room has filled to the point where there are a few people hovering around your table in hopes that perhaps you will leave and they will try and snipe it from you and occasionally

just clear their throat in your presence, hoping that maybe you'll recognize their status. We're here, we are here. I make myself look real big. I put my staff out. Yeah, feet up on the other chair. Holding the chair for Jester. What?

Move on, friend. They eventually make their way the opposite side of the room, and they perpetually throw a stink eye in your direction. Are we in the front, or the middle, or the back? You guys, I believe, took a table near the stairs, which would be on the right side, probably, for a table that was available,

if you're looking from the entrance where you came. So it would be on the northeastern side of the building. How big an audience space is it? Roughly. 10-2. Roughly, it's 10 tables. How many people are crammed in here, at a guess? Okay. 10 tables, that's a lot. Fire a code. Yeah.

No, throughout the interior of this whole chamber, you probably have,, including yourselves, close to 50 to 60 people. Okay. It's a house. Okay. That includes the people that are standing, because the tables have either been taken by... Some of the tables here are set and reserved for people

that are only two folks that sit there, no one else is allowed to take the table, and it is enforced, and they come with their own Zalazzo bodyguards. Are they there, the two people? Yeah, there is a couple that is currently situated on one of the central tables. What do they look like?

Oh, okay, so the first one you see is a human woman, probably in her early 20s or so, very vibrant blonde hair that is pulled back and left into these curls that spiral down off the shoulders, wearing a low shoulder dress that's made of what looks to be a very fine, you can't really make out the material, but it has a sheen to it. Beautiful jewelry. Across the way, you can see a much older man, receding hairline a bit, deep grayish turning white hair, very deep set crow's feet on the sides of his face where his eyes are almost not visible. The eyelids themselves seem to be drooping and the wrinkles beneath are encroaching upon what little of the eyes you can see.

Probably in his 70s or so. Very, very well dressed with a coat and tails. And his attire, both their attire seems to be more Dwendalian than Menagerie Coast. At least in the styles that they're wearing. Though they do have two Zalazzo that are hired and keeping a watch at the table. Jester, you recognize those stuffy pants people?

Good one. Thanks. No, I've never seen them before. Have you eaten any of this cheese? It's really good. No, but we got you two milks because there's a two-drink minimum. Oh, thank you. Yeah.

As drinks have been ordered, to your specifications of the table and the drinks here are expensive. I covered that. Okay, so I'd say for, there aren't, it's rare that you get rounds here. You either get high-end liquors or bottles of wine. Whatever it is. Table service.

Whatever is expected here, Caleb covers it. All right, that will cost you approximately. One platinum. Almost, six gold. Okay. Wow. For two bottles of wine. So generous, Caleb gold. Okay. Wow. For two bottles of wine. So generous, Caleb. Thank you.

Actually, no, I'm sorry. I've been wrong. That would be, for the liquor, it'd be six gold. For the two bottles of wine, it's 10 gold apiece, so 26 gold. Ooh! Yeah. I told you I was rich.

Do you tip in the Menagerie Coast? Is there tipping? Is in the Menagerie Coast tipping? I don't know, do you tip here? The whole fucking society is based off of it. Caleb does not know that and does not tip. Love it, love it. He has no experience with any of it.

Just like a Zimmia. The doors are closed on the other side of the chamber. The band brings their song to a close, and a bit of a murmur takes the quiet room as the lights shift. The candles, they were all that warm, yellowish-orange light suddenly, all at once, reduced to a low red flicker.

Ooh, this is exciting. I should have peed before the show started. I never really get to watch from down here. This is exciting. And that's where we're going to take a break. No! I'm so ready. I was ready for it. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Y I was ready for it. Oh.

Y'all ready for this? All right. Now onto the stage. So we'll come back to here in just a few minutes. We're going to take a quick break. For us and for you folks, we're having our giveaway tonight, our Wyrmwood giveaway. Wyrmwood, whip it out. How's it look? The fantastic dice tower set made from cherry,

cherry wood right here with the Raven's Call cartography from our friend Devin Rue. Does an amazing work there. It is beautiful! Yeah, it's the whole magnetic set where you can go ahead and assemble your dice tower and a little tiny dice box in that. In order to enter, you have to jump over

to the Critical Role Twitch, that's twitch.tv slash Critical Role, and in the chatroom enter the code word PETS, P-E-T-S, one time only. More than once, you'll be disqualified. Want to go with Professor Thaddeus? Yeah. Perchance they didn't know what it was then. Enter the code there during the break, and we'll come back here shortly with a winner. So we'll see you guys here in a few minutes. Yeah!

Why, hello there. This is Critical Role's resident art dad, also known as Liam O'Brien. We are continuously amazed at the artwork this community creates. That's why each Thursday at 8 a.m. Pacific, we share a curated gallery of submitted fan why each Thursday at 8 a.m. Pacific, we share a curated gallery of submitted fan art over on critroll.com.

If you'd like to submit your art for consideration, visit critroll.com slash submit. And thank you to all of the incredible artists who share their talents with us week after week. And welcome back, everyone. So we have our winner of the Fantastic Wyrmwood giveaway. The person who won is Fourpony. Fourpony, congratulations.

Fourpony? Yeah, it's an F-O-U-R-P-O-N-Y. Fourpony. Okay, Fourpony. You always want a little Fourpony before the pony. Pony. Fourpony's important. Congratulations, Fourpony. You always want a little four pony before the pony. Pony. Four pony's important.

Congratulations, four pony. We'll get that information and get this sent out to you ASAP. Well done. Such good work. And I wanted to remind you folks also, as we are two minutes away from the drop of the Waterdeep Dragon heist adventure being available within D&D Beyond,

for those who aren't aware, not only is it a cool new adventure, but a lot of great people got to work on it, and I had the opportunity to consult on the dragon heist, helping flesh out villain factions and story elements there. So it was a lot of fun to work with the team, super proud of it. There's some fun bits in the book

I hope you guys will enjoy. But you have, as of now, one minute. 60 seconds. 60 seconds being able to get it, so look for it ASAP. All righty. Click on the site, cover your body in blood, download it right away.

The proper way to celebrate. All right, so as you've all been sitting in your seats enjoying your small table snacks, the chamber has closed, the lights have shifted, and there is a bit of anticipation and tension in the room. As the musicians begin to slowly build up to a new type of song that begins to fill the space, you hear the gentle footfalls

down the stairs, curving down from the right-hand side to the central staircase, the beautiful visage of the Ruby of the Sea. In her dark dress, the train dangling up about six or seven steps behind her as her fingers trace the sides of the railing. She comes down, takes a breath, and begins to gently sing to the audience around you.

And you watch as everyone in the room begins to lean forward to the audience around you. You watch as everyone in the room begins to lean forward and trance, the beautiful voice filling the interior of this inn. The lights seem to almost flicker and shift with her emotional intent of the song. As her voice fills the space with warmth, the light seems to brighten ever so gently

with each crescendo. Even the bartenders themselves have stopped. They've seen performances like this hundreds of times. It's still a performance that draws attention from all across the coast and beyond. Jester, you've seen this many times as well, but it doesn't ever lose its luster. You see as all the tables themselves are just quiet,

as she steps into the center of the room, walking from table to table, tracing the edges with her fingers, making eye contact with each of the patrons. You see as that older man and the young woman sitting at the table both sit comfortably watching, but can't help but smile in the presence of this fantastic vocalist.

You see at another table, there is a rather burly-looking man who is well-dressed, though a bit rugged for what he is wearing, who is flanked by two dwarven bodyguards, it looks like, and he's leaning in real intent on the table towards her. As she steps by, he touches her hand, and she touches it and pulls away a bit and gives him a wink and continues singing.

He pulls back into his chair, resting. You watch as one of the other tables has these three merchants that have been there since the moment you arrived, who seem to be eagerly counting out coins and pushing the edge of the table to tip her. As she passes by, she glances off to one of the assistants who rushes over

and scoops him off the table. She does not accept the tips herself. Classy. Yeah. But nevertheless, for those of you who this is your first time here within the Lava Chateau, this is definitely one of the most beautiful performances you've seen, and you immediately see why Jester's mother,

why the Ruby of the Sea, or at least one of the many reasons that she's renowned across these lands. As she completes the piece, she ascends back up the stairs, back to her chambers, vanishing from sight as everyone within stands up and begins clapping and cheering.

Bravo! I see it, I see it. Yeah, nice. We'll put it in post. Yeah. With that, the doors open to the backside of the inn. Some folks begin to saunter out their performance that they've come to see for the evening complete.

Others go back to their meal and their drinks and their conversation. You watch as some individuals begin to approach the bartenders and eagerly ask for what you know to be the availability for companionship that the ruby has for the evening. Good luck. Dude, Jester's mom has got it going on.

That was really good. Something. She was so good. Isn't she wonderful? So much poise. Turn your fucking thing away from me. Sorry. It's hurting my heart. You can't even watch SPCA commercials. So I get to look at her.

Yeah. She was amazing. I know. I mean, how much does she make for a performance like that? Oh, I don't know. We never counted it. Does she only work on tips,

or does she also get paid from the venue, or is that kind of like, argh. I mean, she lives here. Oh, right. But she gets paid for other things, and as the tips from the singing. The singing kind of pulls in the other things. You know what I mean? No.

It was mesmerizing. Jester, I mean, she really had an effect on the room. And the, was it just me, or did the lights seem to dance when she was singing? That's automaturgy. Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do, I make the lights flare just a little bit.

He watches the lights flicker and shift in a similar way that they did with the performance, and some of the patrons stop and look towards the stairs to see if she's coming back down again. That's so cool. Keep your pants on! Making them want an encore, huh? Are you all in love with her now?

She's a striking, striking woman. Stunning. Very impressive. Would she sing with you when you know, when you're alone? Well, yeah, she sang to me all the time. Did you sing with her? Sometimes. Mostly it was just her, though. Do you ever wish you could do what she does?

Be that pretty and graceful and sing really good and have a bunch of people think she's wonderful. Yeah. No, of course not. I like myself just the way I am. I think you're pretty and graceful and pretty graceful. Thanks, Beau. Your singing voice is nice.

Thanks, Beau. When did you hear me sing? When you first told us about your mother. Oh, that's right, I did sing for you. You're welcome. Hey, look, we made it through a whole show with no frog people attacking us or anything, so that's good.

That isn't over yet. That happened at the last show we went to. Yeah, big scary dude. Oh, that's right, man. That was our first show. First show. Did you want to spend more time with your mother? Did you?

I would assume so, yeah. Well, of course, usually after the performance is taken by other things. The heavy footfalls catch your ear as these stomping sounds start making their way down the stairs and you watch as a male figure comes down on a huff. One of the men that you saw watching the performance earlier,

the more muscular fellow, getting a better look at him now, you can see he has a rough, tangled, almost like a bowl cut that is a bit unkempt at the shoulders, a very wide neck. Once again, he's well-dressed, but his sun-weathered skin

and lack of social grace and his physicality belies this weird space between how he holds himself and how he dresses. But nevertheless, he storms down the stairs, his two dwarven bodyguards leaving, along with him, and they end up exiting the inn. He didn't look very happy. We probably got turned away

because my mom was already taken. How does she figure out who's going to be the customer? Is it like a lottery or a waitlist system? Kind of a waitlist, but usually she only has a few patrons during any given period of time. So, you know, she'll have the best diplomats that come to town, and if they've claimed that time, then they can just spend time with her

for an entire week or even more, and nobody else will come to see her. You know what I mean? Does she have to deal with a lot of jealous suitors? Sometimes. There's a lot of people that want to marry her and have tried to court her and stuff like that, but she only ever said yes to my dad. Oh.

She's got lots of security, obviously. This place seems pretty well. Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of security guards around here, unfortunately. Well, should we just leave her in peace? I mean, if she has work to do, we should leave. Is there a time of the day or the week where, you know, that you would have mother-daughter time?

It would usually, you know, she'd come, tuck me into bed late, late at night, you know she'd come tuck me into bed late late at night you know afterwards so sometimes it would be I would already be asleep but she'd come in and say like I'm just saying goodnight to you love you know and then she'd go and then we'd wake up and sometimes we'd have breakfast but sometimes we wouldn't and then sometimes she was gone for a few days at that time you know because the people here they don't really want to know about their daughters or anything like that, so I would stay hidden,

she would tell me to, and then sometimes, you know, she'd be free and then we could have lunch or something. Sounds fine. Yeah, as a, I mean, I think we'd all like to meet her. Would tomorrow be the time for that? I can send a message. Or, tell you what, I'm not going to waste this bell slot. I'm just going to run upstairs and tell Nadeen

to not disturb my mom, but to ask if it's okay if I come by tomorrow, maybe? Yeah, as Nadeen was throwing, goes like, Actually, your mother, and opens the door, and your mom, who's taken the dress off and is currently put on a comfortable robe, turns and goes, Jester, I have taken no suitors this evening,

so we could spend it together. Oh. What? Really? You said you wanted me to meet your friends and want to hear their stories, and I need to say thank you to those who kept my little girl safe. Mama, that's so wonderful.

I'll be right back. Can they come upstairs? Of course, of course. Do you know if we can stay here tonight? Ah. Well, you are welcome to stay in your room if you like. I can definitely have rooms arranged for all of you if you would prefer. We'll see what they think.

Whatever you prefer, my dear. I run downstairs. You can talk to her tonight, you can talk to her tonight, we can go back upstairs, come on! And I turn back around and go running back upstairs. Okay. We follow. Okay, yeah, we follow.

You guys head all upstairs and eventually make your way to the third landing and the chamber is open and there Nadine's waiting and escorts you in. Beautiful chambers with a large canopy bed. You can see silks in the windows that have elements of gems and beads knitted into these braided cords that you can imagine during the daylight would add bits of color speckles throughout the chamber.

You see a balcony that overlooks the entirety of the wharf below, and also known as to be the balcony where Jester got in trouble. Mm-hmm. But there you can see within this, this music's, exactly. It's Marquis. Or Marquise. Marquise.

Marquise. That is nuts there now. I was very confused by that exchange. But chairs are being brought up. More food is being brought up behind you. Two more bottles of wine have been fetched to your chamber, and their robe placed on, most of the jewelry removed, but still fully made up and smiling as you enter, you see the beautiful red-skinned Ruby of the Sea.

Her dark hair now tied up behind and resting down the back of her robe with a single curl that runs in front of the face on the right side. Faintly white, almost yellow gold eyes. The horns that curl backwards and then shift off of the sides abruptly before curling back a little bit.

It's this beautiful curl that accentuates the way her hair falls behind. It gives this almost a wreath and a crowned look to her, this almost regal presentation, even when she's just wearing comfortable robes. But as you all enter, one by one, she goes, Please, know that you are guests of me here within this.

Call this your home for as long as you'd like to stay. We could stay here forever if we wanted to. That is most. I don't think that's what she meant. Well, you would have to eventually pay, but you are welcome to stay for a while under my name. Please, I would like to know the names, if you would like to introduce. This is Fjord. I met him earliest.

He's a half orc, and he's growing his teeth back, and he's very, very handsome. I can see that. It's a pleasure. I can see where Jester gets her good looks from. Well, I can see where she speaks honestly in front of her mother as well, and she puts her hand out. I'll give her a kiss.

She pulls away, but rests just a moment on your fingertips before pulling away and smiles. I can see you are a very strong-willed and protective man. Do you watch over Jester in my stead? I do, I try to. Good. I feel better knowing that she's safe in your care.

Anyway. This is Beau. She's really strong. She's the one I was telling you about that can fight things with a stick. Right, you mentioned that earlier. Beau, it is a pleasure. Sup?

She reaches and shakes your hand. I also kiss her. Do the fingertip thing back. Huh. The pleasure is mine as well. Caleb. This is Caleb. He's a wizard. He has a lot of fire and stuff.

He likes his books, and he used to smell bad, but he doesn't anymore, he likes water now. You have a beautiful singing voice. Thank you very much for the performance. You have a very charming daughter. Thank you and thank you. You, I can sense a bit rough in the social graces, so I am very honored that you would come to see my performance.

Is that a Zemnian accent? I am afraid so, yeah. It is. It shows that you've traveled some distance to be here. Yeah. I appreciate that. Fish out of water, yeah. Well, you found plenty of it here, so perhaps the fishers found a home. She's good.

This is not, she's very, very, very brave, even though she's very small. Be careful of your rings. I wouldn't steal from your mother, and if I did, we would solve the crime. That's right, because we are detectives, and we're really good at solving cases. She's kind of my partner and crime.

Well, very, I was not aware this was the dress of a detective. Oh, am I still in my? Yes, you are. I will drop my form. This is what you really look like. She takes a step back. Oh! I'm sorry. Oh, don't apologize.

I... Oh, it's in the teeth. One of his hands. Not his hands. Fucking seagull feathers, like, tasted through the skin. This is seagull blood, this is not human blood. The world is made of all kinds. If you need an extra seagull or two,

I have seven to spare, and I would happily leave you one or two of those. They are the rats of the city. I have had plenty, but I thank you. They sure are. Well, I think you are very adorable. It is a pleasure to meet you, Nott. You are adorable.

Well, she's very nice. It's lovely to meet you, I'll curtsy. She grabs the edges of her robe and counter curtsies halfway while she's sitting in her chair. And this one. And this is Caduceus. Yeah, he'll pop back up.

He's got pink hair. He used to live in a cemetery. He doesn't know a lot of things. He doesn't know anything about sex, and he drinks dead people's milk. Interesting. Oh no. He doesn't know a lot of things, he doesn't know anything about sex, and he drinks dead people too. Is it interesting? Oh no. Less of a cemetery, more of a graveyard.

It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. The pleasure is mine. Why, you've not been outside of this graveyard that my daughter speaks of? Only recently, yeah. A man fresh to the world of vice, I presume? Ah, aware of it, but just trying to only dip a couple toes in.

Oh, my daughter will break you of any habits of ignorance very quickly. I don't know what that means. Good. I would like to know what that means. You carry very interesting companions. I would like to know what that means. You carry very interesting companions. I know. They've saved my life, you know,

and I've saved theirs, because I'm a really good cleric. Did you know that I do that now? I did not. I can heal people, Mom. That is incredible. She can heal people, Mom. That is incredible. She can heal people. She is able to. She's been very helpful in a few frays.

We owe her quite a bit. Well, I am grateful that you all have kept her safe. And I am excited to hear that you've been able to do such incredible things. But is this your friend, the one you mentioned before? The Traveler? Oh, no, he's not here. No, but the healing.

The healing? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow, oh, very well. I know. That is incredible. Yeah. Here, let's have some drinks. The servants begin to uncork the wine. What do you prefer to drink? To be honest, that one.

She points to one of the two bottles that were brought up. You can see it has, as opposed to the smooth wine bottle, this has almost a faceted gem-type crystal design to it. The cork itself has a deep crimson ribbon that's tied around it, and you can see there's a little wax seal placed upon it. Oh, hold on, let me go get the aerator. Oh, what's that?

It's a cantrip. You begin to tell her tales of the adventures you've had and recount how you've met, and you talk for a number of hours or so, and she's smiling and listening and engaging. While she is this beautiful, matronly woman, there are moments where you can see that warmth and pride creep through when she looks at Jester,

and you can also see that there is a very reserved and controlled wisdom and intelligence to her. She's a very perceptive woman that asks the right questions at the right moments to throw you off guard a bit and also get a bit of honesty. You begin to see how the quality of her companionship comes from her insightfulness and ability

to bring comfort to any conversation. Though you had all these expectations and you have your guard built up, you can't help but strangely feel welcome and open with the person that you just met. You take a moment to think on that and see, this is really an incredible woman. But you've all said so much about yourselves.

I am afraid there has not been too much happening here that is different. Performances are great. There is two new songs that I have requested written that should be completed by the end of the year. I can't wait to hear them. I can't wait to perform them for you. What happened with Lord Sharp?

Did he cause too much of his thing? Not with me. He knows better than to go after a well-connected and mostly innocent figure. I have been working to try and get those charges eliminated, but it is a difficult process. He is a man who,

his pride is very important to him. So, in time, but for now, perhaps just do more of what you've been doing to not look like yourself once you leave this space. Hypothetically, if he were to pass away, would the charges disappear with him? I mean, yes. But I would not insinuate such a dark thing.

No, no. I remember what we talked about. Criminal penalties. It's murder. That's one. It's on the scale. A1, bingo. It's on the scale. Yeah. All right. We do really good things most of the time, though.

Well, what has brought you here? I mean, I'm happy to have you, but if you are just here to see me perform, then I will. We should show her the letter. Oh, yes. We're solving a mystery. Yeah, like, remember, we told you we were detectives. Right, right.

We're also here for some other forward things, but he has the letter. We're trying to figure out the provenance of this, that's a detective word, of this letter, and who wrote it, and who's it for, and stuff. What's that? Indeed. Would you mind if I asked your mom? Oh, not at all, go for it.

Just because you're so established in this region, so well known and connected, as you mentioned, does the name Marius LePoeil ring any bells? Let me see. LePoeil? Not directly, but I may be able to ask around. Well, if it wouldn't be too much of an inconvenience.

I would, perhaps. She hands it back to you. Does that letter say Avantika on it also? It does, yeah. Does that name mean anything to you? Unfortunately, no, I have not come across an Avantika. How about the Captain? Or Ionis.

There are many captains here in the port. Indeed. I apologize, but I know many. Ionis is another name mentioned in the letter. Ionis is the time of year? No. No, it's many thanks to you. I think it's an I.

Oh, yeah. I don't know an Ionis either. You do recall that Ionis is a member of the Jagentoth family up in Shadycreek Run. That's right. Yeah, that was the connection with who that letter was intended for. To the Iron Shepherds. Yes. Right, okay. That's right. That's right, that's right. Yeah, that was the connection with who that letter was intended to be. To the Iron Shepherds. Yes. Right, okay, okay, okay.

That's all good. Another dead end. We'll figure it out. This is a vibrant city, and there are many people that come and go. Perhaps you could find somebody to help you out there. I will continue to ask around. I'm just being careful with my socialization these days.

Please, we don't want to get you in any sort of trouble. We're... Well, it's no trouble, I just... Socialization, why, Mama? I've been having some problems with a client. What are you talking about? It's fine, it's fine. I've been having some problems with a client. What are you talking about? It's fine, it's fine. He's a very intense man who relocated here from Fiolin

about two months ago. A burly fellow named Algar Diomen. Funny hair? Yes, kind of strange, interesting taste in a presentation. Was he the guy that was here tonight? Yeah, kind of strange, interesting taste in presentation. Was he the guy that was here tonight? Yeah, kind of buff. That was him, yes.

He was very, um... Was that last night again? Danium? Diomen. D-Y-O-M-I-N. He's become very possessive. He has been a client of mine a number of times, and while his conversation was on the dollar scale

of individuals I've been with, he paid well, and did not seem to bring a problem, but has become more and more possessive, and only in this past week, I have been hearing of him threatening and telling other clients of mine to back away. I do not enjoy people threatening my clientele or my business, and I have twice now explained to him precisely the nature of our arrangement and relationship,

but that does not seem to be enough for him. Now, I have the Zaleso of the Chateau on my guardians, and they're very good about keeping watch. I have my friends in the archways, but the more I look into it, I believe Algar works directly for the Concord within the city, so he is with his own powerful allies as well. I'm on.

The Clovis Concord. This is my first time dealing with scenarios like this, but I'd prefer to avoid any sort of direct confrontation by any means necessary, any bloodshed within the Chateau. So we lure him outside of the chateau and then we kill him. Sure. I don't want him to hurt you, Mom.

If you're trying to break up with him, you could tell him that you have the creepies, the crawlies down there, and that might make him, scare him away. I appreciate your cleverness, Little Nott. However, rumors travel quickly. Oh, that would ruin your, for the other clients, too. For some of them, perhaps.

Smart. You are unable to speak to the law here. He has not broken the law, and his friends in some places enforce the law. So that is where my conundrum lies. And what exactly does he do for the Clovis Conclave? I honestly don't know. I'm not certain what kind of work he does,

though he often brags about his importance, as men are wont to do. He does seem rather wealthy, and he bears enough respect. Perhaps the Warfmaster may know more. Maybe we can get him to fall in love with someone else. That would be helpful. I mean, I don't mean to brag, but good luck. I mean, we could just kick his ass,

intimidate the shit out of him, tell him he's not a fuck with you anymore. If he is beyond. Yeah, but that links it back to her. Be careful how you dance around that. I'm sure discretion is appreciated. Very much. The old woman in the lighthouse

has been here for some time. Could ask her, perhaps. The old woman in the lighthouse? Yes. Someone lives up there? Yes, the keeper of it, the light keeper. Does she have a name? Gladys, I think.

I don't mean to pry into your business too much, but are your appointments exclusively here, or have you ventured to his place of love? No, they only meet here. It needs to be on my terms. It needs to be in my realm of not being here. No, they only meet here. It needs to be on my terms. It needs to be in my realm of safety. Understood. Do you know where we might be able to find him?

Does he say where he stayed? No. He's also been braggadocious, but not forthcoming with personal information either, which is unfortunately a sign of perhaps dubious and or dangerous business. He's told me twice he wishes to one day show me his secret, his great servant beneath the city, but. What?

His great servant beneath the city? Understood. Oh, great. Shellbeast. I'm sure with a personality as large as his, it won't be too hard to find some information on him with some gentle poking around. And just speaking hypothetically,

it would not upset you any if he were to disappear out of the disappear. Accidentally. Not be around. I do not believe he's done anything that would warrant anything too disastrous, but if he can be ensured that his presence is not welcome and agrees that is the case, that would be optimal.

Well, we will try our best to reach the optimum result. Do you know if there's a place where the lowlifes of the city like to congregate? The underground? There are many. Yeah. There is, over here,

and there's the skew, which is the general, where most of the riffraff and common folk live, but if you're looking for more social environs, all across the Restless Wharf, there is the Open Quay. Those two places, a lot of curious folk wander and celebrate fisticuffs. It's not uncommon to find bodies in alleys. I love celebrating fisticuffs.

Yeah, you do. Just cool, Tracy. Algar Diamond? What was his last name? Diamond. Diamond. Algar, right? Algar? Diomen Algar, A-L-G-A-R. Diomen Algar.

Jester, I have to say, I don't feel any great rush to continue on out of this city until you at least feel that your mother is safe and protected. Really, you guys will stay here? Please, I do not mean to impose my responsi- Mama! We are going to take care of you! Yeah, I mean, you did take care of us

in those early days, even if you didn't know it, but Jester picked up the bill a lot. That's why I ran out of money. Thank you for sending that package, by the way. Of course. I'm sorry it took a little longer than anticipated. No, no, no, no, it's fine. You mentioned the lighthouse.

Would we need anything to enter the lighthouse? Some sort of token of familiarity or some name that would maybe get us a tour and meet the proper people there? As far as I know, there is but one person there. I have not met them directly, only heard of them. Gael and Gladys. Gladys.

She is the light keeper of the lighthouse. I know that she can be rather ornery, so perhaps you just need to win over her interest? All right. She's a bit older in human years, so be respectful, I guess. We love old people. What are these interests you are referring to? What interests, you said to our friend, Mr. Clay here.

I don't know. I don't know what her interests are, but perhaps if you could find out, or at least not make her extremely angry. Well, it is good that we have the world's two best detectives with us. That should be an easy task to fulfill. Yeah.

Us. Oh, that's right. You haven't seen us solve a crime yet, but. We do a really good job. Sure. Jester looks extremely motivated. Perhaps we taking care of this simple errand for you might help compensate for a few nights stay? I do not require compensation,

but if it makes you feel better about it, certainly. Thank you. Quite the gentleman. He's actually not the gentleman. We met a guy, goes by the name Gentleman. Have you heard of him? Oh, she's like, okay. I don't know who knows who. He's blue as well, and he's always sweaty. Yeah.

Dark hair. He's wet. Yeah. He's a wet walker. He's always really wet. A wet walker. Yes, I know of him. You know of the gentleman?

Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Because we're not cool with him so much. Well, I know of a man of you describe, of bluish skin and quite sweaty, yes, he has come through before. Was he nice or was he not nice? He was very nice. He was very dashing.

Yeah. I told you about him before. What? What? Wait a minute. But not the gentleman, though. I don't know the name, the Gentleman, but yeah. He has dark hair, he has got black hair that's really long.

And blue skin. Oh my god, your mother knows the Gentleman, that's so cool. It goes a little deeper than that, do you see? Is that? Is that what's happening? That's why you always have a little sweat right there. I'm sorry about that. But this is why you can do

watery stuff, right? Like cold stuff? Right? Can you do that? Tell me more of this gentleman, please. Kind of like watery stuff, right? Like cold stuff, right? Can you do that? Tell me more of this gentleman, please. Oh my gosh, okay, well, he lives in Zadash, and he lives in a bar, and he's got long black hair, and he's really like, hmm, kind of charming, sort of, but kind of snarky at the same time.

What's the name of the bar? Well-dressed, smooth-goods, but kind of snarky at the same time. I'm dressed, smooth-forged, little patch of dark hair on the chest right there. The leaky nip. Wait, yeah. Leaky tap. Leaky tap, not the leaky nip. That's a very, very different.

No, leave one, leave one! I'll look it up, I'll look it up! Put it in the other box. Same one. Evening nip! No, no! That's the name of it? I'll look it up, I'll look it up. It's written in the other book. Same as the nerf. Evening Nip. No. No. That's the general Evening Nip, yes. Yes, the Evening Nip is based on the Evening Nip.

We're buying all of our towers. Oh my god, we're freaking out. We're freaking out. This is huge. We have a gift for him or something? We have many gifts or something? Yeah, we may provide, we have nothing to offer, but we can provide many gifts.

I have gifts. I know. He has a barkeep man named Five Bits. I'd like a drink. He knows a guy around here, too, named Father Pierce. I don't know about anything in that regard, but he wasn't named the gentleman when I met him. What was he named?

I never asked. I have a vial of his spit. Can you analyze it? No, I don't know. I don't know. What was this fucking shit about? She smirks a bit and says, Oh, honey.

No. He did wear lots of rings on his fingers. We had a bit of a romance years ago. How many years ago, by the way? I've told you about Bobanon. Bobanon? Bobanon! Bobanon! Bobanon the son?

I didn't ask if that was his name, though. Bobanon. Youranon Dosal? I didn't ask if that was his name, though. Your dad's name is Bob? B-A-B. Wait, Bob, Bobanon? B-A-B-E-N-O-N. Bobloblob. Bobloblobloblob.

I have no idea what his name is. Bobanon. Bobanon Dosal. Barbasol. Wait, Bobanon what? Babalon? Labrador. Here we go.

You say he's in Zadash now. But yeah, you said he lived in the ocean. That's what they told me. What? The Tsar? Dosal. Oh my god. What if the gentleman is my dad?

Wait, what? Are we saying if or are we saying is? Well, we don't know for sure. Your mother might know for sure. Do you have a picture of him? No. Do you have a drawing of him? You draw a picture.

You probably got drawings of him. He made me a book. This is the perfect time for a game of Pictionary. I'm so excited. Both of you, both of you, don't look. Oh yeah, you draw one and she draws one. Oh, sure. Oh, draw!

Policeman style. I'd like to think the party is legitimately this excited. Oh yeah, oh, very much so. I don't understand what's happening. This is the best episode of Maury ever. You can see, Marion seems both present and not. She's trying to process all of this. What is this thing?

She reaches over and goes to her counter and begins drawing. She's not anywhere near as good an artist as her daughter. This is pure gold, what's happening here. It is amazing what's happening over here. This is a lot. I love that you're physically doing it. Oh. Oh yeah.

I'm glad that an offhanded joke about the gentleman led to this. The cartoon character Daria. That is Daria. Those are huge sweat drops. Wait, let me see. It looks like Daria. Daria with a beard.

Jester's a really good drawer, even though I'm not. I keep poking at it. No! Yep, yep, there's no getting around it. Oh! Imagine this is like Da Vinci. It's very Scott Pilgrim. Have you seen this one?

Are you drawing Matt right now? Well, yeah, if you're going to draw a picture, I'm going to draw him real fast, too. I want to take more time, Matthew! Matt's a really good drawer. Not at this speed, I'm not, no, I'm not. Have you seen this boy? She's not a good artist, either. Matt's a really good drawer. Not at this speed, I'm not. Have you seen this boy? She's not a good artist either, she's like.

Oh, that's so much better! He looks the same! That is him! Let me see, let me see, let me see. Does it look like the same person when we look at the two drawings? You can make a connection. Okay.

So is it the same person? We need to know that. Jester, that is quite the revelation. Wow. Your dad, I mean, Babadun, is tracking us. Very tracking the band. He has our blood. I am so confused by this, but you've talked to him,

you've seen him, you know where he is? Yeah, he's in Zadash. Do you want to go see him? I can't. Oh my gosh, oh my gosh. I'm going to send him a message, okay? And then we can see if it's him, if it's him. I sent a message to the gentleman.

Okay, what do you say? Oh god, oh no. Oh fuck. Oh my god, oh my god. Is your name Babinandosal? Have you ever been to the Menagerie Coast? Oh my god, do you know the Ruby of the Sea? Oh my god.

He's going to think he's being wiretapped. Okay. So the spell sends no response. Maybe you should say, This is Jester. No, he's gotten my message just before he knows it's me. That message probably interrupted a threesome. Yeah.

He does have, I've seen him having sex and stuff. We haven't seen it, but we know. Probably doesn't bother your mom. But I wanted him to be true to her forever. I'm going to try one more time. Oh gosh, okay. What do I have? Is it nighttime already? It's getting late.

I mean, it's late evening. It's probably close to midnight by now. Okay, this is, I'm going to think about what I'm going to say on this one. I'm using my Pearl of Power. It's my last third-level spell. Oh god. Oh god.

Hello, gentlemen. This is Jester. Please respond. Just yes, if you've seen the ruby. Please. Was that 20? Oh. Oh, Oh! Oh shit! Oh my god! Oh my god. Please tell me in place of those exact pauses. Of course it does. Of course it does.

I want to hear some 1988 phone voicemail message. Oh yeah. Throw it on top of that. Thanks, gentlemen. I'm on the phone right now, if you need me. There is a palpable pause of nothing. Then he responds. There is a palpable pause of nothing. Then he responds, No, that's preposterous.

That's preposterous, he says. Maybe it is. Did the guy that you know use words like preposterous? I know a lot of people use the word preposterous. It's a fairly standard word. I don't, it just feels, okay. Preposterous. I'm sorry, maybe I just got a bit excited. Apologies.

Apologies. I didn't even think to ask about him in Zadash because I thought he would be in the ocean. In the ocean? Yeah, he told Mama he was in the ocean. Said he had to leave and take care of some was in the ocean. He said he had to leave and take care of some business on the sea.

Never saw him again. Just like a man. You're not wrong. But though he may be gone, he left me with the greatest gift I've ever had, so. And she runs her hands through your hair once more. For that, I'm thankful. Do you still love him?

Love is a funny thing. There's still a part of my heart that will always be his. But it's been decades. You move on. Decades? Holy shit. That could mean literally two decades. You're 60.

Or three. I know, like. Do you not know how old you are? Of course I know how old I am. I was just questioning my mom's math result. That kid's going to be 20 years. Yeah. Or 30. I'm 50.

50 years old, I kick. I stretch. Regardless, you can see she's flushed in her face. We've gone through a lot tonight, so maybe we'll just leave you to your peace, and you need to process some things, and then in the morning, we'll go not murder this guy. Definitely not.

Definitely not. Definitely not. Yes, I see what you did there. I don't. Is there a thing? Oh, well. I will have the rooms arranged. I will send the servants to get it taken care of. You will have the finest suites of the inn for the better part of this week,

and longer if need be, just let me know. You can see she's a bit shaken by everything, but is trying to put on the facade that she is good. Anyway, it is a pleasure. Thank you for the companionship, for the words, for the stories, and for bringing me my little sapphire. I should probably sleep. Good night. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, and if you need anything to be shown, Todd, I have friends who can help you. Oh, on that note. I don't understand what that means. Freebie, you could have sex with someone. Oh. Well, oh. Why?

Not a freebie. That's fine, let's go ahead. I was going to ask you if she could recommend any bookstores, but I was mistaken about what the topic was, so. No, you might not have been, I don't know. Can you recommend any bookstores here in the city? I don't really go out to the bookstores.

I have books brought to me. But you may look around. There are a handful, I'm certain. Okay, let's go. Yeah, let's call it a night. Thank you. Good night, and she pours her glass full. Shit. Holds it and sleep well,

and she kisses you on the forehead. Good night, Mama. Good night, Jester. Closes the door. Caleb, for all of this, for the last hour, has been trying to figure out if she seems okay. So in this moment, does she seem okay? I don't think she seems okay.

But you know what I mean, even prior to finding out that news, I just mean seeing her mother. So I'm saying for the entire evening here, even before that. Well, that'd be more of a question for her. Yeah, but I'm not asking, I'm just wondering. How do you feel?

Well, kind of stupid for not thinking to ask the gentleman when we met him, but. Ask him what? How would you know? He didn't ask you. Hey, crime boss, are you my dad? I did think it was fun that we were meeting somebody else who was blue. Yeah, but you don't know a lot of blue people in the world.

Are there? I assume. You're also not constantly perspiring or anything. Yeah. It's true. Only just now. It's true. Did you want to have a drink and think about it or go for a walk? I think. Or a swim.

Why would I need a swim? I don't know, because you're half water person. Oh. Nott, are you going to go swimming with her? If she wanted me to, I could. Really? I would do that for you. What about a night swim?

It's actually pretty dangerous to go through this gizet. Yeah, that's what I thought. Can I just see if your fingers are webbed or anything? They're not webbed. What if he's my dad, you guys? Well, then you've had nothing but positive interactions with him, right?

We didn't do anything, what did we do with him? Did we do anything weird? You're done very right by him, but we've also tipped him off to the fact that you assume that he might know your mother at a more intimate level. Yeah, you have put that on the table. Is that bad that I put that out there? Well.

I guess it depends on if he's trying to hide it or not. Would be nice to see his face when you ask the question, you know what I mean? This is the sort of conversation one would have in person, I suppose. Yeah. It's a question mark right now, but there will be another chapter to that story.

I'll just send him messages every day. Oh! Oh no! I don't know if that's a good idea. Why don't you give him a few days to ruminate on what you have just said and see if anything returns? Or maybe we will return. It's your decision, though.

It's going to be so long before we go back to Zadash, maybe. Maybe. At the very least, I think you should sleep on it. Okay. Should we turn in for the night, then? I guess so, it's pretty late. I bet you go right to sleep, yeah. It's past midnight. Oh, sure. What stories did your mom tell you about your dad?

Just that he was very charming, and that he wore lots of rings on his fingers, and that, you know. Came from the sea? Well, that he had, he lived on an island in the sea. And they were going to get married. He said he wanted to, and he went to prepare his house and never came back.

She thought maybe something bad happened to him. Perhaps he's hiding, which is why he couldn't answer that question. But she said he was very charming and very sweet and very funny. He always made her laugh. It's good that you get to see your mother, though. You seem very happy to see her.

I am. She's really wonderful, isn't she? Oh yeah, she is. We should go to sleep. All right. Your rooms are arranged for you. They're Pillowtroverove level presentation. The interior is warm and the beds are ostentatious. For poster god, yes.

Yeah, for what you guys are used to sleeping in, you almost don't know what to do with it once you lie in bed, it's almost too comfortable. Are they all kings? Roughly, yeah, queen to king. But you all manage to find yourself some rest for the evening. Some more tense than others.

Some setting up invisible threads. But the morning comes. With the light of the sunrise, you open your windows and look out over the ocean and the city below and you can smell the salty air. The moraine layer has brought in a familiar gray sky to those of you who grew up to the more northern regions of Wildemount.

You can still hear the distant calls and caws of the flying seagulls and ocean birds. You can see some of the higher buildings and towers with their little perched clusters. You watch as a few dive down into the merchant districts of the city and some distant echoing yells as they shoot back up with the caught fish that was supposed to be sold.

The ships are already out and starting their day. You can see maybe a little over 20 or so that are out in the main harbor and scattering further to find their specific areas to begin throwing their nets into the water. The morning is yours. How'd you sleep, Jester? Great, I slept really good.

I was thinking, one thing that might help take your mind off this is making sure your mom stays safe, right? Mm-hmm. You can take some solid steps to making sure that Galdar? Algar. Algar Diamond. He stops.

Yeah. Let's go find him. Okay. I have an idea. Okay, what's your idea? If you go on a date with him, fall in love with him, get pregnant, then he'll want to settle down

and make you an honest woman, and he'll never go back to your mom again. That's perfect, but then I might have to stay with him. Sure. I don't want to do that. There is actually a lot to do this morning. I feel like we should maybe send some to check out the lighthouse, maybe talk to the Wharfmaster, and maybe send someone to.

Maybe go to this open quay. Yeah, just some light scouting, yeah. I'll head to the lighthouse. We're trying to find him, where he lives, who he works for? Anything, I think. Survey the territory. I think we should probably be speaking to

the people on the docks, yeah? Yeah, I would like to find the Morph Master. I wonder where the Concord is. Yeah, where they're based. Isn't there a headquarters? Actually, the palace-like center here, the Marquis is the head of the local chapter of the Concord that looks over Nicodranas.

The Concord itself is a loose union between all the cities in the local chapter of the Concord that looks over Nicodranas. The Concord itself is a loose union between all the cities in the Menagerie Coast. There's a margrave in each city that is the head of the city, but then works with the other margraves to interface and make sure everything's good, bad, and business as well. So that would be the center of Concord influence here.

Okay. We've managed to enter relatively quietly. I think if we can maintain a certain level of anonymity, we can acquire some decent knowledge. Meet back here in a little while and share? Do we want to do two groups? I suppose we could. Lighthouse and the Wharfmaster.

All right. Works for me. Maybe we can all meet up at the Quay afterwards. Ooh, I like it. The open Quay. That's a great idea. Midday? Midday at the Quay? What do you say? I say okay.

The Wharfmaster is going to tell us what now? Yeah, why are we talking to the Wharfmaster? I would like to talk to the Wharfmaster. Oh, you just want to go talk to the Wharfmaster. Great. Plus, it would be a good chance to ask around about Algar. He's influential on the city. In Zimnian, it's pronounced key.

You say quay? Yeah. What is a quay? I'm so confused, let's go. Okay. Who's going to the lighthouse? People who can talk, they said that she's ornery. Okay.

You three, Nott, do you want to come to the Wharfmaster so you can take a swim? I'll go to the lighthouse. Awesome, on the water. Yeah. Guns out. What about you, Jessie? I'm going to the lighthouse, I said.

Okay. Fjord to the lighthouse, two to the Wharfmaster. I like it. Okay. So heading to the Wharfmaster is Fjord and Beau. Biceps and triceps. There you go. But before we get there,

I'll pull Beau aside. Yeah. All right, so this is my turf. Yeah. There may be some familiar faces. We came in before, and I didn't change the way I looked. I wanted to see if maybe that caused a rustle. I'm going to change the way I look now.

Okay, so you didn't notice anything before when you came in as is? Yeah. Do people not like you here? No, I want to ask about my old crew, my captain, son of a bitch who betrayed us and all that. I just don't want people to know that I'm alive. When I was back in Port Damali

and I went looking through stuff, just my mere presence there when none of the rest of the crew was, was enough to get looks. Sure. That's what drove me out. So I think I'll be able to discover more. If you're not. Me. You. Yeah.

Deal. All right. Do you want me to, like, am I like your servant? Am I your bodyguard? Am I just your yes man? I can be your yes man. Pipe man. Sure, yeah. Copy that. Yep. And I'll use Mask of Many Faces to

make myself look like a very tanned human with jet black hair pulled back into a tight ponytail in the back with a black goatee. Yeah. Maybe slightly overweight. Ponytail in the back with a black goatee. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe slightly overweight. I've had some better days in the 80s. All right, Steven, so you. Russian accent, vague.

My name is Chagall. Chagall. Steven Chagall. Chagall. Steven Chagall. You cannot mix those two impressions together. My name is Shugal. Shugal! Steven Shugal. Shugal! Steven Shugal. You cannot mix those two impressions together. It's too dangerous. All right.

I suddenly remember my Chalamet. It doesn't work, it doesn't work. All right, so the two of you make your way back to the Restless Wharf. You're searching for the Wharfmaster specifically. Go ahead and make an investigation check. Oh god, yes. I know what that modifier is.

No! And since Beau's helping you, you can do advantage on that one. Thank you. That was the same roll both times. That was really shit. Eight. Okay, Beau, have you retrieved the professor

or have you left it with the inn? Oh, he's staying with the inn. Okay, Beau, have you retrieved the professor or have you left it with the inn? Oh, he's staying with the inn. Okay. You spend the better part of two hours or so wandering up and down the wharf asking questions before you eventually have somebody go and point you over to, oh, if you're looking for the Wharfmaster,

he's at the wharf load right there, and points over to one of the larger center parts of the dock that jettisons out into the harbor a good 100 or so feet. You can see there's a central dock house that is one of the buildings you saw when you first entered, where you saw a lot of the business was busting around, though it's not as busy

as it was at dusk when you first entered the city. Of course the Wharfmaster's at the Wharfload. I know, I should check. You probably should check there first. Why do we do that? I don't know. Okay. But as you approach the building, you open the front door and somebody's pushing past you.

There are a handful of Zalezo looking around, but it looks like entering the Warfloat isn't a militantly guarded experience. So as you enter, there's one Zalezo across the way that's just sitting in a chair and looks to be looking out and chewing on some sort of a rough tobacco-like leaf in their jaw. Across the way, you can see a couple of folks,

humans that are in the process of filling out big leather books, ledgers and receipt books of various people traveling through. You see in the back, over a table with a bunch of papers rolled out, what looks to be either charting maps or large assembled lists of previous excursions, you see a male dwarf, probably in middle to older age,

red hair that tends to eventually expire into a deep gray at the end of this really, really curly matted beard. You see big gold thick earrings that hoop from each earlobe that seem to have the weight of this heavy thick lobe has dragged the ears to stretch a bit past the face. The hairline comes as a deep widow's peak

that recedes almost back to the top of the head before coming in. There you can see in a similar tangled tuft the rest of his hair that coasts just past the shoulders before it exerts a strange puff. He's wearing a simple leather tunic over a work uniform, but looks to be three or four fairly expensive-looking necklaces or amulets that clatter around as he moves.

You get the sense of his placement, and the other individuals going up and asking him questions, probably the Wharfmaster. I'll make my way up to him if he's not busy. He looks busy, and there is a counter that prevents you from traveling in without going around it. So if you begin to make your way around the counter,

one of the individuals there puts a hand up and goes, Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Can I help you? Yes, I'm so sorry. I was wondering if I might be able to speak with the Wharfmaster, and I'll produce two gold coins and start to rub them together. I'll see what I can do.

Takes the coins and pockets them and walks behind him, begins whispering. The dwarf puts his hand up for a second and finishes making a couple measurements and then, Hey. All right. Kind of jumps off of a small stool and comes over with heavy footsteps

across the wooden creaking floor, now standing over the wharf, approaches the edge of the counter across me and goes, Right, so you have summoned me to you. What can I do to help you? I'm sorry, we're quite new in town, unfortunately, my companion and I. We're from Port Dam'm sorry, we're quite new in town, unfortunately, my companion and I. We're from Port Damali,

and we're trying to put down our business roots here. I'm sorry, does Vandran and his crew, do they make shipments here regularly? It's one of my return clients. Make a deception check. Oh, 26. Nope, well, I roll 19. Do you have advantage on that? Oh, why did I roll advantage on that?

What was your first roll? The 13 plus 20. Okay. Why did I do that? Sorry. I don't know, just double-checking. All right, he looks like he's... Hold on a second. You see his gears turning

and he goes through a couple of books. Unfortunately, by the records we have here, Vandrin and his ship was lost at sea months ago. So I apologize. That's quite unfortunate. I've been given a task here in town. Algar, does he do a lot of business here on the wharf? Yes, he comes and goes rather commonly, yes.

I happened to cross paths with him one night while drinking. I guess we made quite the impression on him, and we are to deliver some items to his place of residence. However, my friend here was shit-faced, and we forgot to ask where he lived. I was hoping perhaps if you could just give us a point in the right direction? I honestly don't know where he lives,

but I know where he works. Oh, yes, that would be most helpful. He works in the Sluiceweave. The Sluiceweave. Not loosely, sluice. Sluiceweave. Sluiceweave. S-L-U-I-C-E. Sluice weave. Sluice weave. S-L-U-I-C-E.

Sluice weave. I definitely wrote down sluice weave. I did the same thing. Sluice weave. Did the same thing. Works better on the arse weave. There you go. Fantastic, that helps us immensely. Do you know of anyone else looking for a merchant,

perhaps on the cheaper side services? We sell things. Yes. Rare things and very boring things at times. If you're looking to sell, you are welcome to go to either Meandering Treasures here in the Restless Dwarf. They tend to pay, maybe not top change, but quickly. to either meandering treasures here in the Restless Dwarf.

They tend to pay, maybe not top change, but quickly. As far as Dezima does his business, usually. Dezima? Dezima. He is the proprietor of the meandering treasures. Wonderful. This has been most helpful. Yeah. Well, I thank you for your time. Are there any available docks for rent or for lease,

if we happen to come upon some vessels or ships? We have, and he looks back to one of these sheets of paper and pulls it out for a second and says, we currently have eight dock spaces not spoken for that are available for rent, if that is your interest, depending on the size of the vessel, of course. Seems like a lot of dock spaces.

They have a lot of openings, business has been slow. No, we've just had a lot of ships leave recently. There's a lot of movement in and out. I'm just curious. One other thing, we heard a gentleman over at the bar speaking, and someone called out to him, Marius LePoil? Does that ring any bell?

How do you say that name? La, la, la. No? Make a persuasion check. How are we saying the last name? Bless Paul. Bless Paul. Bless Paul.

Persuasion. 15. How are we saying the last name? Bless Paul. How are we? Bless Paul. Bless Paul. First wave. 15. It's like, I've seen him around. He's a dubious sort of prick. Yes, a very gregarious personality, from what we could see. What does he do, exactly?

Fuck if I know, to be honest. He'll take some space. He's done some work at the docks here and there, but it's just he robs me the wrong way. Probably find him drinking any of the dives. Ah, that is where we should look. If not round already. Ah, yes.

We did notice actually last night, there seemed to be an influx of strange characters coming in last night. Did you happen to see anything around this area? There were some strange cats that came in last night off the docks, yes. Anything in particular that caught your eye? He starts giving you a curious look. You're asking a lot of questions for a person I've just met. I'm so new here, I was just hoping to acclimate myself and perhaps. Of course, well, let me give you a very

prestigious piece of advice. I think that will help you in your business dealings here. Don't ask so many questions. Yes. Perhaps it's time we take our leave. Yeah, right. Thank you. Sorry, salt water air, it's not used to it.

Good day. He turns back and clomps back over to his table and is working, but keeps looking up, expectantly waiting for you to leave, and like... They do the three backward steps, and then the turn, and then the walk out. Perfect. Yoink. Oh, well, man.

You guys are really great, right? That was pretty awesome. Thank you. I really locked it out. I was just like, just following your lead, then? Yeah, like came out of nowhere. You got a lot better at that. Thank you. Okay.

Thank you. So I don't know, where do we start? I mean, well, I guess we meet up with the others. And he said that that guy hangs out at the Dives. I know. So like, two birds, one stone. Smash. All right, let's hit him.

So what are you guys doing? We're going to head to... The open-ish. What time is it? Yeah, is it midday? Midday at the Quay? For us non-wizards. At this point in time, I'd say it's probably a little bit past noon, since the morning.

Oh shit. Midday. Fuck. It's going to be midday. Yeah, we should go meet with the others. We go to the open Quay. Yep. Okay. So you guys are heading there to meet with the rest of the crew, right? Yes. All right, so the rest of you folks,

you make your way towards the Mother's Lighthouse. During the day here, and as you approach, you do see there are a few fishermen that come up and there are a number of small wooden plates that are weathered and dried and cracked in places. They've been left out for a long time, but they'll walk up and they'll place dried meat, fish they've caught, sometimes somewhat ripened

and some rotting fruit that have been placed there. These appear to be offerings as some sort of a subtle worship to the Wild Mother. You're familiar with some of these practices, though. Not quite as crass, usually, in Friesentation, but it seems to work for travelers that wish for safe exit from port. It's really pretty. It's beautiful.

We should go inside. We're going to go inside and talk to Gladys, yeah? I wonder if it looks like you can still tell that there's boobs from the inside. Maybe it's built into the architecture of the rooms within. Maybe you can sleep in one of the boobs. There's still one way to find out, yeah?

To find the door. All right, you walk over to the door. It is a standard, thick, dark wooden door with what looks to be a small slot to look through that is currently closed. You wait about a minute, there's no response. Nuk-nuk-nuk-nuk-nuk-nuk-nuk-nuk-nuk-nuk-nuk. The louder one seems to echo a bit,

and after another minute or so waiting, you hear this faint creaking sound. Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh. It's haunted. It's a robot. It gets louder and louder, until eventually, the small door opens, and you see what looks to be this really shriveled woman's face, these beady little dark eyes peeking through that goes, you see this really shriveled woman's face,

these beady little dark eyes peeking through that goes, Can I help you? Are you Gladys? I am? I think we're supposed to talk. My name's Caduceus. I'm, uh, Mother sent me.

Make a persuasion check. Fuck, what the fuck? Mother sent me. With advantage. Ooh! He's a damn serial killer, I knew it. Persuasion check? Oh, motherfucker.

Persuasion, yeah. Mother sent me. Yeah. I bring you skin. That's not terrible. 12. 12, it's not terrible. 12. 12, okay. She peeks in and looks at you.

And may the grace of Melora bring us to talk. And it closes and you hear. Whoa. Damn! And it creaks open. For as high as the slip was, the woman's head's about two feet lower than where it was. You can see there's a stepping stool

that's attached to the back of the door as it opens up slightly and escorts you to step inside. The woman you see, if you can imagine a more burly, after working physically every day, Estelle Getty, a little whiter, you can see she has no sleeves on this long working dress and looks almost like

a leather apron or uniform that she wears. Her arms, while the skin itself is sagging and wrinkled, there are some guns on this old woman. Her hair is just this tuft of really tightly curled white hair, no glasses, just the beady little dark eyes. Where she smiles, the wrinkles cause this butterfly effect across the rest of her face. And human?

Human, yes. So you invoked the Mother. I assume that you are also a follower of hers? I am, I am. It is a long and complicated story, I suppose. We've been holding the North against something dark. Something threatens our small temple. holding the north against something dark, something threatens our small temple.

Have you ever been to the Blooming Grove before? I cannot say that I have, my apologies. It's quite all right. This has been the first sign of the mother I've seen since leaving my home. Well, I am happy that she could be a beacon to you, as she's been for so many who've passed through in Nicodranas. She's a really big beacon.

Her temple is under threat up north. I was waiting for a sign, and I think this is the sign. Well, perhaps her guidance is going to be very useful to you in seeking out a way to cleanse this temple you speak of. Yes. I'm so sorry, how rude. My friends and I, it's only fitting.

Is there any service that we can provide for you, just for your graciousness in allowing us into your lighthouse? Well, I cannot guarantee entry to the top of this. Peeks around the rest of you. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hello. Hello. Do you sleep in the boob?

No. Well. The triple boink afterwards. I don't know if I can be of much help to you. I am but a simple mistress of the tower, but um. I feel that there is wisdom here. Would it be possible to learn more about this place? Possibly.

I can tell you of its history. Come in, come in. Thank you, thank you. All of us? Noisy out here. Sure. Wee. So many horses on this lighthouse. You know, kept trying to find the right audio file

and they all just kept coming up real busy. They've been shooing horses outside. Just on Tuesdays. It's a really busy wharf, guys. Yeah. A lot of, well, anyway. Fuck me for trying to add atmosphere, right? He's juggling a lot of plates.

We know. I know, I know. Please, last week I was like, how does this shit work? What do I do here? Oh man. It's all good. She lets you all in with a bit of agreement Please, last week I was like, how does this shit work? What do I do here? It's all good. She lets you all in with a bit of a grimace and goes, All right, this is the lighthouse. It's really nice.

It is of the mother, Melora. Looks over those ships at sea, keeps them safe. Not just the ships at sea, but farmers as well, right? Probably. But the lighthouse mainly just helps the sea. Sure, sure. So this is like a temple, then? More or less.

And how long have you been presiding over it? I've been here for the entirety of my life, for now 86 years in Nicodranas. That is respectable. You climb all these stairs all the time? Yes, that's how I've gone to this age, and still as spry as ever. He starts walking up the first set of stairs.

Come, come, you should see the view. I'm very excited. Oh my god, I love it. As we walk, I know that this was our way in or whatever, but we got to cut to the chase at some point, right? What chase? There's been a lot of, you know, for Pony, but we need to get to the actual.

Oh, fucking. Call that amazing. What are we supposed to ask about? Ponies are still outside. About the guy, about Algor Diamond. We'll get there. We should call him Algor about Algor Diamond. We'll get there. Why'd you call him Algor? Algor!

He invented the internet. It's like a random moment right now. It's fucking our dreams. Every time we do it, it just adds more hit points. Oh! Oh man. I'm having a moment. Oh man, you just triple-luxed over Purvan

and please be on. So good. But we need to ask about the guy that we came to ask about. So, you know, wrap up the god stuff. So here in this tower, the lady looks over us. Those who wish to have her guidance,

to prevent dangerous storms at sea, or the draw of the tide to bring them to the depths, are wise to leave for her some gift before they traverse on their journey. You will see here is the viewing window. It is not for sleeping, and it is not the mother's boob. Oh, it's her eyeballs. You glance out and you can see now,

there is a window that's set right about where the clavicle is. Just kidding, it's where her clavicle is. It's a beautiful view of the entire harbor, especially this time of day when the sun's at its peak. You see this beautiful set of ships out there, and fishing vessels, and galleons, and a handful of different designs to each,

different make from all over the world. One that appears to be a Marquesian make. You can even see through the very, very clear ocean waters here, you can see shapes far below the waves from this view as well. You can see elements of a reef in the distance. You can see a few broken and long, silt-recovered remnants of ships

that had sunk in this harbor from long ago. It's breathtaking in a way you weren't expecting. You can keep gawking if that is your preference, but the lighthouse is up top. Follow me. Exciting. To the top floor, you have the view of everything around you, not just that front view of the harper, but this beautiful image of the ocean and the shoreline and the fields and rolling hills that surround Nicodranas,

of the Sirios Mountains to the north, and then farther to the east, you can see the jungles that then vanish up the sides of the Ashkeeper Peaks. It's just a tremendous view. Then the entire city below, it's once again increasingly breathtaking from the one you previously had. And this is my home. This is a really good home. It's a lot of steps.

I can see why you're in such good shape, Grandmother. I'm right. You should keep up, do more cardio. You get a lot of visitors here? No, not really. Really? But it's so cool inside. Why don't people want to come see you? Kind of prickly.

No. No. No, seriously, if your friend with the pink hair wasn't here, I wasn't going to let you in. He's a good one. I am not even looking at the view, I'm looking at the lighthouse. Now that you can see, now that you've focused on this, there are no windows to the lighthouse,

there are just a metal structure that holds up the top. This faint, maybe 15 by 15 foot dome that marks the ceiling of it. Each of these openings between these metal rods that holds that up are where the light protrudes. Now, in the center of it, and you can see now the marine layer starting to burn away in the midday, and most of the fog has receded towards the horizon,

the blue sky having returned. In the center, you see this rough cut, almost a quartz-like crystal that's about three and a half, four feet in diameter that's set in the center of this top floor. I'm going to compare it to mine a little bit. Hmm. Magic letter. It is my responsibility to invoke

the Mother's blessing of the stone, and each day, Habit's Light guide the ships back to safe shore. I have my own responsibilities to her as well. I can sense. Even looking upon you, I can smell decay. This place, it's so different.

Was it perhaps a gift from the law bearer long ago? That is a very astute of you. gift from the law bearer long ago. That is very astute of you. It was where the, at a time when their temperaments were less in conflict, the two in union blessed upon this shore the gifts of stone that then built this tower. It is beautiful.

I will admit we have many tasks that weigh upon us that bring us here. I have two favors that I would ask of you, and I understand if they're not possible. Well, I can maybe help with one, and probably laugh at the other. So choose carefully. Very fair.

We have a friend in town in need of a good turn, and this good turn, we have a friend who's threatened and we're hoping to maybe glean some information. It's my mom. It's my friend's mother. A mother, so there's your in right there. Ah. Cute.

Having a difficulty with somebody. Algor Diamond. Algar. Algor Diamond. Algar. Algar Diamond. I've seen this man around in the streets below. You've just seen him from above? Have you ever talked to him or any of his? No, I don't really talk to people. I just look at them from below.

She points over to the edge and you can see there's actually a spyglass that's leaning against the edge. She goes, I see a lot that goes on in this city. Do you perhaps see the thing beneath the city? No. But I know there are things beneath it.

I fear that he may be in contact with something inappropriate. Do you see where he goes? be in contact with something inappropriate. Do you see where he goes? There are a couple of places, I believe. Do you know where he lives? I do not know where he lives. Can I look through your spyglass, please? Wait, tell us where he's placed.

Make a persuasion check with disadvantage. He goes. Easily distracted, easily distracted. It's shiny. he's placed. Make a persuasion check with disadvantage. Then he goes. Easily distracted, easily distracted. It's shiny. It's shiny. Disadvantage. Disadvantage. Aw, why though? 11. Oh.

11. 11. As you instinctually reach for the spy clasp, she slaps your hand. No. Why though? Because it is my eye in the sky, not yours, insolent child. Keep on target.

But it seemed like you were about to discuss, you've seen his pattern in the city where he goes day to day? Depending. When he disappears to do most of his work beneath in the sluice something. There are two submerged gates in the harbor. The sluice weave, perhaps you're talking about.

The sluice weave, yes. Not that you know that technically. You said sluice sweep. Not that you know that technically. You said sluice sweep. Oh, they said it. That shit happens. That's fine, that's all good. Vanish from the game. I know, you're done. Get out of here.

Caleb is murdered. No. Remember that sluice there. Oh, sluice sweep. Metagaming seagull. Uh-huh. Bar? Bar? I killed like two other men. Sluiceweed? Oh boy. Two submerged gates under the harbor?

Did... The harbor has protectors and has from many generations that exist beneath the waters in the city. That is part of how the sluice functions. I believe this Algar person you mentioned works in some sort of managerial position there. At the sluice. At the sluice. So we go there and we just can go down? Do we have to swim to get in there? Probably need some sort of a small boat or something,

but if you're going to go there and you don't have approval, you'll probably be arrested. Oh. Oh. I don't want to be arrested. I'm sure we can figure something out. Are you a goblin? Do I look like a goblin?

Yes. Shit. People have told me that, that I do look like a goblin. I'm a goblin. And you're working with these people. They've looked past my hideous features, too. You're not hideous. She is invaluable. She's pretty hideous. She is invaluable to us.

No, you're not. She's a capable woman, we need her. She does good work. I may be ugly on the outside, but inside, I am... You're wonderful and you're beautiful on the outside. You're hardly ugly on the outside, but inside, I am... You're wonderful and you're beautiful on the outside, too. You're hardly ugly on the outside. Look, it's okay. That is something we have in common.

What do you mean? What, do you think I've lived alone here my whole life because I'm a spinster? I mean, you seem like a relatively normal-looking person. It's okay. I think you're beautiful. I think you could snap me like a twig. I think it's okay if you know. I think you could snap me like a twig. I think it's okay if you know.

I think I could, too. I do have my last request, and I will take these people out of your hair. Please. Getting too great on me? I'm looking for a sign of where to go next, waiting for the mother to speak. Is there a place to sit quietly and

find her voice? SAM and LAURA laugh. That's the laughing things she said. Ah. That's fair. For your trouble, and I'm going to pull out one of my teas. What is it? Mm, it's blessed from the mother herself, from one of the graves of the

less scrupulous families of the north. Good for muscle tension, I find. Grew it myself. This is a very kind gesture. Very thoughtful. You serve the mother well. It's only fair that you be rewarded. You as well.

All right, now get up. Thank you for your time. Sets it down on a little side table and quickly pushes you back towards the stairs and quickly just. Does she start walking us down the stairs? Yeah, above you and humps. That was a long walk, though.

This is awkward, goodbye. You're not ganking that telescope. I'm not trying to gank the telescope. She's trying to get in the boob. Maybe I am. What are you trying to do? Like a book. Well, they wanted to before she started ushering us out

to invoke duplicity and make it look like I was in front of her, but to really stay behind. Oh boy. Okay. It fit in poorly. Make a stealth check. I was also going to say as they went down that Caleb was going to make a big to-do

and start saying, you know, we didn't have a chance to talk about when we were above. I am in the market for some books, and I was wondering if you knew of any bookstores. I'm going to give myself the blessing of the trickster. You got to do that beforehand. Motherfuck. How did it go?

Did anyone call dibs on the dodeca? Nope. Nope. Eight. So as you're heading down the stairs, you jump off to the side in that small alcove where the window is. I don't have a bit of a character. Then a second one of you appears and she goes,

and begins to walk past you and stops and turns right and looks right at you and goes, Are you going to join your friend of you? Yeah, I'm coming downstairs. Good, go! Come on, Jessie! Okay. I have Master at stand now, so I'm coming downstairs. Good, go! Come on, Jessie! Okay. I've mastered stand-out, so I'm still.

But you know, a full-on library, or perhaps a smutty bookshop even, because you never know what you're going to find in there, or even just a used, vintage book, oh, you're not even, are there any bookstores in the vicinity of this lighthouse? She pushes you while she's not answering any more questions, she's like,

out, out, out, out, you, both of you. Her hands pass through your duplicitous image, she goes, that's strange, okay. Out, thank you for the tea, goodbye. Goodbye, goodbye. Yes, but book. Have you heard of our lord and savior, the Traveler? I thought she was really nice.

She's pretty cool, I liked her a lot. I did, I don't think she liked most of us, but she's pretty cool. She loved us, we were great. Me and my duplicate skip away. All right, let's go, it's midday, we got to go to the open quay. I mean, for that to rhyme, was that just a?

It's been rhyming a lot. This is the first time I've gotten it. So, Beau-er-art. Huh! What's your passive perception? Beau-er-bar. Passive perception? Beau-er-bar. 13.

13? 13. Okay. I have that written down here, actually. Die, passive perception. Okay, good to know. All right, so you guys eventually meet up. How long have we been outside now? What did I not notice?

You guys have been outside probably about three hours or so total of travel and asking and getting questions. I'd say two and a half. You're just spelling and spelling and spelling? I'm just doing my charm spell, keeping it up. I mean, my disguise spell the whole time. Damn.

Passive perception, just perception plus 10. We should get you a disguise! 10 plus perception is good, yeah. That probably would be smart. Damn. Yeah, no, mine's ugly. It's ridiculous. So you guys eventually gather in the center of the open quay.

Now the open quay, this is the western side of the docks in the city. Whereas the Restless Wharf seems to be a really busy dockyard that runs a very tight ship and seems to be a really busy dockyard that runs a very tight ship and seems to be filled with elements of cheap entertainment and elements in that vein. The open quay, it's a little bit smaller.

It seems to be less organized, but in the center of it is this one massive tower that looms over the entire district of the side of it is this one massive tower that looms over the entire district of the side of the docks. You see an emerald stone, dark green with elements of light, green flecked through it, spire,

that seems very out of place amongst the rest of the storage buildings and the various other small homesteads and businesses that fill this entire area. It seems to be dotted with a number of small balconies and then comes to a slight roofed peak that is almost like a sharpened point. It's very out of place here.

You've passed by it a couple times before, but you haven't really inquired much about it, as if most of your business here has been on the job. So you've just not cared to really ask a question. I was going to say, as we're walking, could we snag a passerby and ask what that structure is? Sure. You grab nearby, you see an older fisherman, thinning hair, very sun-weathered face,

carrying a small sack over his shoulder, what seems to be very supplies and quilt rope over the other shoulder as he's heading off towards the docks. He stops and turns. Uh, can I help you? Yes, we're new in town. I couldn't help but notice that structure there, very unique.

What is it? That's Tidepeak. It's the tower of Yussa Aranis, the mage who owns this district. Ooh. Ooh. There's a mage that owns this district? Yes, to the chagrin of the Clovis Concord, yes. The chagrin?

They don't get on, do they? You could say that. I need to get to work. Yussa Rennes? Yussa. Y-U-S-S-A. Y-U-S-S-A. What the fuck was that? Yussa Rennes? Yussa Rennes. E-R-R-E-N-I-S.

E-Rhenys. We got a wizard's tower. Wizard's tower! Playing cup-its! That's where you find carpets. I was about to say. Yep. It's not.

Lead us to the cup-it! That's usually how that works. Around the Tide Peak, do we see the Sleaze-O, like the guardside Peak, do we see the Sleazo, the guards around it, or is it not as guarded as other structures are? There are Sleazo around the area. They're still keeping the peace here, but there are no Sleazo guarding the tower.

From where we, are we far, far away? Hundreds of feet, less? Yeah, a few hundred feet, I'd say, from the tower. And it stands out like a sore thumb. Yeah. I'm sure a detour wouldn't hurt. I just want to get it closed off. It's kind of long away.

You know, it's fine, exactly. Let's do it. We'll make a detour just to go closer to that on the way to the open quiet. Okay. You approach it and the district, distinctly around this tower, the road is very wide surrounding it.

No buildings are buttressed against it. It seems to be solitary amongst the rest of the constructed buildings here. Like people are deliberately trying to stay away from it? There's no buildings next to it. The folks that walk in the streets nearby tend to walk on the opposite side of the road. No bodies of water, pools, lakes, decorative?

Nope, it's just ground and it's built in the center of this district and everything's either built or shaped around it. Does it look like it's been there for a really long damn time? Make an investigation check. 15. Wait.

Nope, 19. Wrong thing, wrong thing. You get up to the tower, begin to inspect its build, and all the stones here look freshly cut. Not a lot of wear and tear weathering to them. It's hard to tell how long it's been here. It seems like it could have been installed last week or 25, 30 years ago.

How close did Beau get to investigate like that? I'd say about 10 feet before you began to really make that assessment. I thought before you started to melt. It is. Sound waves. Ooh. Yeah.

Weird that they're just avoiding the thing. I mean, these bricks look so new. And green. Why so different? Can we touch the outside of it? You go and touch it, it's cold stone. Did you see an entrance? Did you see an entrance? Did I see an entrance?

Not yet. No. How, is it a super long runner, is it like a tower, like a circular sphere? Yeah, it's a tower's fire, but the base of it's probably somewhere between 80 to 100 feet in diameter. How about we nonchalantly walk by the entrance just to get a, yeah.

Do you want to go that way and I'll go that way and we can like, meet around? Okay. Okay, you guys run around, meet at the other side. No entrance. The fuck? There's no door. I didn't see a door. No, me either.

Windows? No windows. There are the balconies, but the first balcony is maybe 25 feet up. Are there flying carpet ports? I know, I keep thinking of Alora's Tower. 25 feet up balcony. And then other balconies above that, but like.

Yeah, they're sporadically cast around. At its peak, it's probably about 450, 500 feet tall. Oh shit, it's real tall. Yeah, it's like this long. Oh, dang. It's been a while. Well, how do you get into a tower with no doors? I imagine you fly. Or maybe there's an underground entrance?

Mm-hmm. Around, go under and up? Yep. You can't parkour up that wall 25 feet, can you? Are you asking me to try? Yes. All right, you want to give me a boost? I absolutely would love it.

Okay, I want to see if I can boost off of Fjord and maybe get up to this tower. It doesn't look like these are bricks that can... 25 feet is pretty high. It's very high. 25 feet, 45 feet, 25 feet. 25 feet's a lot. It's the world's largest mimic.

Yeah. You grab a handle. No, and to help visual thing, I said 100 feet wide diameter, but it's a bit wide for what I was originally written. So it's mostly about maybe 60 feet. In diameter. But can I climb up to the balcony? That's your estimation from this four point.

Go ahead and make an acrobatics check. I'm helping her, I'm getting really old. Acrobatics, acrobatics. Broad daylight, scale and ability. Yeah, 100% a terror line. A busy workplace. A building that everyone is trying to avoid in town. Nancy!

Average. 17. 17, you have advantage because he's helping you. Ooh! Not that one, not that one. Cobalt, Cobalt. Oh! I'll take the 17. God, it was almost.

I know, it was almost a 20. You run, leap, Fjord catches your foot and gives you the meager, not very strong lift, but something to help. Your first foot hits the wall, the second one hits, and you get what feels like a moment of traction before you only get about maybe 12, 13 feet off the ground before I dove.

I did not catch her. Okay, Fjord just steps back and you whack. Catch me, catch! Whack, whack! Goosh. My ass bone. I'm sorry, I'm not real, I thought you'd make it up.

I thought I would, too. It's really slippy stone. You're getting damage because of that. Yeah, 1d6 for 10 feet. Yeah, I already know this math. What's too many dice to count. Well, thankfully you have Slow Fall as a monk ability. I do.

Which I've never had to use. Calculate the official stats. You would take six points of bludgeoning damage from the fall. But I reduce my damage five times my monk level up to 20. Yeah. Ooh. Yeah, monks can fall from very high

and not in a three-point landing and be fine. Oh man. Wow. So you still hit your tailbone, and it still stings a little, but you don't take any damage. We'll let the others know. Okay. Okay. Then we'll go to the open play.

Okay. Aren't you supposed to fall gracefully as a monk, then? Did you just reach up as hard as you could right before you landed to split that speed? Is that how monks work? Yes, definitely. It's all about the graceful encounter. All right, so as you guys round the corner

and you watch Beau suddenly slam into the ground near the central tower. There's our friends. Yay, that's Beau. What's going on? Why are you jumping up and down? Oh, I was just doing some one-finger pushups. We're trying to get in the tower. There's no doors. Why were you trying to get into this tower?

Well, I've seen it several times coming through before. It's called the Tide Peak, but there are no doors. Okay, I have seen all kinds of places many times that I didn't try to get into immediately. What were you trying to accomplish? Did they have doors? Sure. You saw it as a challenge, you saw it as a mountain to climb. Yeah, everybody seems to be avoiding it, it sticks out in the general area, and there's no doors. I just found it odd.

Maybe it's a puzzle. Also, apparently he's some wizard that has a beef. Oh, maybe, yeah. The dog can. They said there's a mage here that presides over this, presides, preside, per, over this district. How does it pertain to what we're trying to do today? It doesn't. Thank you for keeping us on task.

Jester, do you know anything about this tower? No, but we do know about the sluice. We heard about a place called the sluice. We heard the same, yeah. That's where this fellow Algor might be. The sluice weave? No, it was just called the Sluice. Pretty sure it's the Sluice Weave.

Yeah, we heard the Sluice Weave. It's underwater or something? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you find it? No, it's terrifying. Let's go find it. We have to get a boat, but we can't just go there because we'll be arrested. Why?

They said, I don't know, the old lady said that. That's what the old lady told us. Like you need an invite? Yeah. It's a gate that protects the city from bad, underwater creatures or something. Well, we heard the whole thing was underwater. Did you hear that?

It's like submerged. Something like that, submerged gates or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we don't have to go. We could keep working on this tower. You know, I feel like you're throwing a lot of shade about us investigating this tower, that I feel like. We were here on time.

Yeah. You know? We were here on time. We were killing time. It is midday, we are at the Quay. Beau. What? He gets a little picky when he hasn't had a book in a while, so we just need to find him a book and he'll be okay. I mean, you would think the wizard would be fascinated

with the idea of a wizard tower that's very mysterious in the middle of the city. It is very interesting. We did also find it. But I thought we were helping our friend here. Do you have wizard envy? It's okay, it's a very large tower. Right, that is an easy thing to go to, so go to it.

Long and rather skinny, so. What'd you find? We did find out that Marius Le Poix, Poix? Yeah. Fuck that last name, he's sometimes seen at some of the taverns around, some of the shadier ones. The Skew or the Open Quay. You don't know which ones?

Okay, but we're in a shady area, right? That's accurate, correct. So we're close to Marius LaPoil. We're also close to the Sluice, maybe? Is that close to here? Is that close to here, the Sluice? You don't really know. Goddamn it.

Well, let's go into the Quay. We haven't been in yet, right? Well, the Quay is the district. You're in the district right now. Yeah, we're in the district. Took up work. Wait, but the open Quay was a low-life dive, right? It's a low-life area.

I thought the skew was the low-life area. No, the skew is a place where you can live. Yeah, it's a heavily residential district for the more affordable and cheaper residents. Is the quay inside the skew? The Meandering Treasurer. Where it's fine, I can pour it in. Meandering Treasurer is a shop.

Is a shop. Is a shop. Is there a barn? There's got to be. Make an investigation check. Let's go find a barn. That's our solution for everything. Yeah. I will aid. Okay, please do.

Okay, okay, okay, okay. It's 17 again. Nope, sorry, 15, 15. I 17 again. Nope, sorry, 15, 15. I keep looking at the wrong numbers. 15. 15, okay. 15. If you're looking around the open quay,

there are a few people that point you towards what's called the Withered Bird Inn, which is an inn and tavern. You've probably passed by before once directions point out, you're like, yeah, no, I've been there. It's a little divey, but it's popular amongst the sailors and folks that come through. If you're looking for something in the Restless Dwarf, the only place that really comes to your attention that's told is a place known as the Wayfarer's Cove.

Wayfarer's Cove, we've been told about that place. Yeah. Yeah, that's where they. We've been told about that place. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's where they said Marius LaPoile might hang out. Yeah, Wayfarer's Cove is supposed to be delivered to Marius. Oh, that's why. Yeah. Gesundheit. We should go there. Let's go there. We're stupid.

We could have gone there already. Well, I didn't know where. Well, yeah, I thought we were. We're not looking for Marius LaPoile, we're looking for Algor. Algar. Algar. But we should still go there,

because we can maybe kill two birds. We've already got seven dead birds. I have seven dead birds. More birds, there we go. Must die. Nine birds, it's not. We got to take what's given to us. Right now, we don't have an invite to get down to the sluice.

So we might as well go by the Wayfarer's Cove. But we're in the Quay. How far away is the Wayfarer's Cove? How far? It's maybe 30 minutes away. 30 fucking minutes. We're going. We're on the way. We're going, unless you want to fuck with this tower

a little bit. The tower is super interesting to me. It's 400 feet tall, no doors. Come back to the tower. We're going to the Wayfarers' Cove, Wayfarers' Cove. Can you climb 25 feet? We were at a lighthouse that is even taller than this, so we could go try to climb that if you like.

Okay, once again with the shade towards trying to climb the tower. It is open shade, Beauregard, because it has nothing to do with what we are trying to do today. I am not hiding my shade, it is out. I am providing shade for you. It's not even shade.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I am blotting out the sun. We have shit to do. No, you blot out the sun everywhere you go, Caleb. Oh, salt, salt. Let's go. All right, so you make your way out of the open quay towards the Restless Wharf district once more. Yes.

Fjord. Yes. As you keep looking over your shoulder, your interest towards the Tidepeak Tower, it's interesting, the further away from it you get, the shorter it looks. You begin to understand how you didn't notice a 400-foot tower when you first entered the city or when you've been around before,

when you've been to this city before. It seems, the further away you walk, the tower almost seems to visually shrink within the city skyline. It's still visible as a tower, and it's still taller than most of the buildings, but as soon as you guys get quite a ways away, you're like, that can't be more than maybe 150 feet tall?

We are continuing on, but I just want to point out the place with no doors also fucking shrunk. For Jord, 100%, it is very interesting, and I have checked the box in the back of my brain. I do want to understand what that place is. It tickles your pickles, doesn't it? Because it's shrinking, it is, mm. I'm curious.

Has the mage, has Usa ever come to see my mom's scene? I can't get enough of this, it's too much. All right, fine. Then sum up, mm-hmm. I mean, this is coming from the guy who spent two hours in a smut shop trying to find magic. I know that you're embarrassed for wasting your time here, but you will get over it.

Let's find the bars! Guys, guys, guys! Look at this cute puppy. Come on. Look at this adorable puppy. Oh, this is such a cutie pie. Make him do the thing. Make him blink.

Poof. It vanishes, and then you hear you look over your shoulder and you can see one of the small tables on the side of one of the various warehouses that contain what looked to be a bucket that had a bunch of tools and various repair materials for ships has been knocked over and the puppy's tumbling out of it.

We have to go save our puppy, come on! Runs up to you and jumps back into your arms. He's like, I was so close, that was really close to us that time. Oh, it's so cute, right guys? That's what I really want. You know how little puppies can barely, just crash into things when they're walking?

Every time he poofs out, I just want like. That's basically what he is. He's a fainting blink dog. He's cute though, right? Puppies are useless at this age, man. I'm not denying that he's cute. I'm just saying he's cute, so let's be friends again and let's just keep going.

All right, finishing the rest of your jaunt here as Fjord is making equations in the air in front of him, As Fjord is making equations in the air in front of him, you eventually make your way, by asking a few more questions, towards the Wayfarer's Cove. As you approach this dark-looking dive

that is probably furthest of all the other bars or taverns you've seen here out towards the docks itself, the super, super dark wood that it's constructed of makes it look almost like a blighted barnacle on the rest of this wharf area. As you approach the exterior, you can see a large piece of driftwood that probably belonged to a ship long before that had either fallen

within the ocean or, after its final voyage was pulled apart and then elements of it were used to either build or embellish on the structure. It looks like the kind of bar that was salvaged or was built from salvage. I know. As you step through the entryway, the doors open slightly ajar,

pull it open, the interior has no music. There is just whispers and conversation. The smell hits you immediately. The smell is a combination of mossy musk from wood that has been soaked with seawater and then left to dry hundreds of times over, as well as the various forms of liquor and ale that have been spilt and left to just stain the wood where it lie. And just a lot of unwashed sailor scent. Oh god. Yeah, the odor in here is not pleasant. Definitely that of the working man or woman

who comes in from the sea. Glancing inside, you can see there is a bar to the immediate left where there is a rather crotchety-looking fella half-elf who is heavily scarred on one side of his face. A bit heavy set for a half-elf. For the elven lineage, it's rare to see somebody who has not displayed more the live side of that bloodline,

but this elf has either worked hard to fight that side of their bloodline and has a bit of a punch and a bit of a soft chin and jawline, looks over to you and nods. He goes, let me know if you need a drink or something. He looks over to you and nods. He goes, let me know if you need a drink or something. Spits off to the side, looking inside,

glancing about the small number of patrons here. There's only five of them at the bar at this time of day. You see one really, really old, salty-looking sailor who has this heavy cap pulled down over his ears to the point where he has these bushy white eyebrows that poof just underneath where the fold of it brims upward and has this big poof chin strap beard around the side. His lips are pressed up to where you can tell he probably has no teeth, so his jaw can press all the way up towards the roof of his mouth. He's sitting there with a large, dark green bottle

of some sort of beer or ale, and is just staring forward, chewing quietly. Off to the right-hand side, you see, for some of you, the first time, looks to be a very, very large humanoid turtle. You see them sitting on a bench. You've seen a few turtles in your travels, but they don't normally travel northward into the Empire.

This one is sitting there hunched over a table by themself with what looks to be a heavy tankard that they're clutching with both of their hands. You see bits of rope that are tied across in a lattice over elements of the shell. On the right side of the shell, you see what looks to be emerging three pipes or horns of some kind that are either carved

or embedded on the right side of the shell. It looks almost like three exhaust pipes, if you will, but they're made from some sort of an ivory-type material. They look chipped a little bit and worn. As it turns back, its extended head and almost like a snapjaw-type nose curves back and you see an eyepatch over the right eye and just grins. You see these series of tattoos up each arm that look like swirling water that curl into themselves and end right at the forearm. It goes back to its drink and sips a bit from it.

You see another patron in the far back is a woman with a weathered, dark brown skin. You see the hair itself is this tattered, wild mass of curled and crimped hair that's graying heavily towards the tips. She has a long, light brown coat made of some sort of leather-like material that probably hangs down to the floor

from where she's sitting, and where high boots are visible from under the side. She's sitting across from somebody who's dressed, looks to be a ready-to-go-to-action shipmate. They have a basic billowing shirt that is just open down to the mid chest. They look to have a readier complexion, probably sunburned over and over and over again to the mid chest. They look to have a ruddier complexion, probably sunburned over and over and over again to the point where now it looks perpetually sunburned. He looks younger, probably in his 20s.

The woman looks maybe in her mid to late 40s or so. Both human. They both glance over as you enter the dark interior, contrasted by the very, very bright light that silhouettes your figures as you step within the Wayfarer's Cove. That's where we're going to pick up next week. Oh!

There's so many interesting characters. It was so awesome! I liked her. The tower! Everybody was so cool in there. Man. It's a weird place. Your home city is cool. Your home city. I know, right? Yep.

Your mom is the coolest. I made up everything in that city. So there's a crushing elf bartender, the turtle with tattoos, a redheaded human woman, and then she was with a man. Yeah, like a normal person. She had dark, kind of crazy hair that goes gray about halfway down

and goes to a gray-white at the tips, this is kind of mane of hair. Amazing. It's our salt and pepper situation. Salt and pepper. What the fuck? Salt and pepper, Steven Seagal. We have many gifts to offer and see if a trap door opens up.

If that works. I like that. That one will pick up in the next week. In the meantime, missed you guys. Happy to be back in the game. Even one week off, it was jonesing. That was a lot of stuff. Yeah. Feels so exotic.

Yeah. That was a later game reveal that the right questions brought forward as a possibility. Yeah. All the strudel and schnitzel is so far away now and we're in this exotic place. Time for oysters. Yeah.

Oysters. Oysters. But yeah, so thank you to our fantastic sponsors, wonderful folks at Look and Raven, and their awesome Kickstarter, go check it out. And D&D Beyond, which now, and have been for a while, available, you can get their Dragon Heist downloaded on your D&D Beyond info. Don't forget to get tickets for our live show

in New York City. On the Ticketmaster or on critrole.com. NYC. NYC, make your way over. See you there on October 4th. Hell yeah. A very classic radio reporter type. Yes. Indeed.

Well, have a wonderful night. We'll see you guys next week. We love you. And is it Thursday yet? Yeah. Good night. No. Oh, hey.

Ashley Johnson here, and I sure do hope you're enjoying the adventure. Remember when you first found out about Critical Role? Was it through a friend or a family member or maybe even through the words of a stranger in the review section of our podcast? Many listeners find our show through word of mouth and recommendations. So please consider rating and reviewing our podcast because each review makes an impression that may just inspire someone new to give our show a try. And that, more than anything, helps to support us. Thank you for joining us on this adventure. And until next time, let us try to leave the world a little better than we found it.