Critical Role - C2E35 Dockside Diplomacy

Episode Date: September 21, 2018

The Mighty Nein find success in their task for the Ruby, but chaos ensues as they continue their search for Marius LePual...Watch Critical Role live Thursdays at 7pm PT on https://www.twitch.tv/criticalrole

Once upon a time, a group of curious storytellers breathed life into epic tales set in the wide fantasy world of Exandria. This is Liam O'Brien, here to welcome you to Critical Role. We'll dive into the story in just a moment, but first, a few notes. This is the audio-only version of our broadcast that streams Thursdays at 7pm Pacificm. Pacific over on twitch.tv slash criticalrole and youtube.com slash criticalrole. If you subscribe to our Twitch channel, you can watch the video on demand immediately after the broadcast.

And it's also available Mondays at 12 p.m. Pacific on YouTube. And of course, for all you wonderful podcast listeners, freshly minted episodes release right here on the Critical Role Podcast Network one week after our broadcast on Thursdays. With all that said, let's get into the story. Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons. Before we get into tonight's game, we have some announcements to get through, so be patient

with us for a moment as we give a big shout-out and thanks to our two sponsors into tonight's game, we have some announcements to get through, so be patient with us for a moment as we give a big shout out and thanks to our two sponsors for tonight's episode, starting with our friends at D&D Beyond. Sam. As I said last week, the Waterdeep Dragon Heist is now available on D&D Beyond, or as Max said last week, and they'll guide your Waterdeep campaign

from levels one to five. After that, explore the legendary Undermountain Dungeon below the city with Waterdeep Dungeon of the Mad Mage for levels five through 20. Waterdeep Dungeon of the Mad Mage is available for pre-order on D&D Beyond and will release November 2nd. Now, because D&D Beyond is such a generous sponsor to this show, Laura. I just wanted to show the audience some of what we do with that sponsorship money. We take it and we turn it into this amazing studio, which has amazing equipment and after effects and editing suites and cool special effects. So we put together a really cool ad for them

using all the equipment. And if you guys would turn to the monitor and see what we made. What? What? What? Hi, guys. As you know, we love D&D Beyond.

It's easy to use. The interface is super high tech. Since their sponsorship helps us make this show, we thought we'd use all the cutting-edge editing software in our fabulous new studio to make D&D Beyond a mind-blowing special effects ad. Explosions, I assume. For instance, look at my face. Looks normal now, right? But when we add high-tech CGI effects...

Oh! I look like a beholder! Roar! Anti-magic cone! D&D Beyond! I look like a beholder! Roar! Anti-magic cone! D&D beyond! Okay, reset. Now check out this awesome face swapping feature. Okay, right now I look like Sam Riegel, but now...

Oh, I'm Matt Mercer. Welcome to Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors get to look at how handsome I am. Oh, now I'm doing a Cajun accent. Okay, reset. But that's not all. Now it looks like I'm holding nothing, right? But now, with special effects,

oh, I've got an adorable blink dog in my hands. Oh, isn't Nugget so cute? And reset. Wow, he's a nugget, so cute. And reset. Wow, that was just a taste of the amazing special effects that D&D Beyond sponsorship covers here at the studio. Thanks D&D Beyond, and if you don't mind, Scotty, beam me up. I'm probably gone by now, right?

That was great. Thanks, Max, I can't wait to see how it cuts together. And I can't wait to see all the effects. They didn't put any fucking effects on it. I mean, we had it all mapped out. It was going to be amazing. And now it's just... It's really lame.

It's pretty lame and also kind of insulting to Matt. I mean, if you want to be amazing, and now it's just. It's really lame. It's pretty lame, and also kind of insulting to Matt. I mean, if you want to be honest about it. Sorry to the audience, and sorry to D&D Beyond. Back to you, Matt. Thank you, Sam. Undeniable. You have more evidence why we should see the return of Max Better Sam James.

All righty. So. Samus Christ. One of these days, one of these days, your escalation is going to be the end of us all. I'm looking forward to it. Guys, for D&D Beyond, I brought a loaded gun! One of these days, One of these days.

Yeah! Guys, it's really amazing! Oh my god. All right, so on sale now, we do have our very first live show in New York City. It's coming up pretty soon, actually, in two weeks. It will be at the United Palace in Washington Heights Thursday, October 4th for the live show. Tickets are still available now at Ticketmaster. You can check out all the details to do so at CritRole.com. I'm sorry, keep talking. I got to get it out now. Better now than in the narrative.

Get out the ones. Also, for those who had a chance to see it, thank you so much for tuning in to this week's episode of Between the Sheets, our first, or our new show hosted by the fantastic Brian W. Foster. Taliesin was our first skinny pig for that. Really in-depth, awesome interview and peek behind the- We got really blitzed on that stuff. That was pretty fun.

Why did we start with a closer, though? I know. That was a good call on my part. We didn't know any other way to do it. Well done, Taliesin. But yeah, so if you want to talk a little bit about the release schedule for that show, for Clean the Sheets, it's every Monday.

Every Monday, 7 p.m. on Twitch is where it premieres, and then of course you can immediately catch it on VOD on Twitch if you've subscribed to us on Critical Role's Twitch on Critical Role's Twitch. Critical Role's Twitch. What are you pointing at? I don't know, I don't know. I'm pulling a Sam Riegel.

I'm adding graphics that aren't here. There's a graphic, right? She's got a graphic. Then it releases on Wednesdays on Critical Role's YouTube channel at 10 a.m. So if you do not catch it live, or if you are not subscribed, you'll get it on Wednesday. There you go.

And to celebrate the launch between the sheets, Brian's going to be doing a Reddit AMA tomorrow, actually. This is on August Universe at 2 p.m. Pacific, so if you want to go ahead and, yeah, if you want to go ahead and razz him through text format, see him on the Critical Role Reddit tomorrow at 2 p.m. Pacific. Also, we've been raising a lot of great money

for Sam's charity, Poblov Foundation, if you want to talk a little bit about that. It's the charity that I'm very fond of, Poblov Foundation. They battle childhood cancer, and what am I supposed to talk about tonight? I'm supposed to talk about the fact that we're doing, because you guys raised so much money, we're doing a one-shot tomorrow night on the Critical Role

Twitch channel. We're going to do a Crash Pandas one-shot with me as the game master and people like Laura Bailey, Liam O'Brien, Marisha Ray, Travis Willingham, Matt Mercer. Basically everyone at this table, except for Taliesin, will be there. He's got enough coverage this week already. He can sit out of it. Tune in tomorrow night at 7 o'clock to see the show. We will also be giving away prizes to some lucky person who made a donation and tagged a critical role in the donation field. That's it. Yes! Great.

Laura, you want to talk about merch stuff? Yeah. We got some things back in stock, y'all. Oh, yeah. You're still wearing your purse, by the way. You are not stopping. I did. We got the Wildemount dice back in stock,

the pretty blue ones that we have, and then we got limited amount of the Mighty Neinice back in stock, the pretty blue ones that we have, and then we got limited amount of the Mighty Nein pins back in stock, check that out right now, they're awesome. We have the maps back in stock, and I have heard that the t-shirts are being restocked very shortly, so that means check it out this weekend, like Friday or Monday, they should be back in there. So just check.

Refresh, refresh. Just refresh. If Friday or Monday, they should be back in there. Oh wow. Yes. Refresh, refresh. Just refresh. If you want them, they should be there. There you go, thank you, Laura. And a thank you to our second sponsor, wanted to bookend it, sponsor, sponsor, returning as our friend here is The Rook and the Raven, who have been doing their awesome, if you guys aren't familiar or haven't seen

the previous episodes, they do these really awesome, high-quality, disc-bound gaming notebooks for your campaign. The fronts, you can see, are of laser-etched designs of awesome maps from our fantastic friend, Devin Rue, who did our Duendalian Empire map earlier in the campaign, which you saw, and just came into stock, apparently. This is their Mischief and Misadventure book,

where you can go ahead and put all your campaign notes and your character info. It's pretty badass. Their Kickstarter ends tonight at midnight Pacific time, so if you haven't got in on it, now's your last chance to do so. It's your last chance to get the deluxe edition of this, as well as the Far Traveler's Notebook at the Kickstarter exclusive pricing, so get to it now if you're planning to. You can go ahead and find that at therookandtheraven.com slash Critical Role to get all the info you need before midnight tonight.

So check it out, guys. Yay, sponsors! With that, I think, all in sweet effects, Sam. Yeah, yeah. Someone will add some effects at some point. At some point. Pew pew pew. I feel like we're going to have to release that now

with effects put on. Our Spooks will take care of it. Yeah, he will, without further ado, let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role. Teksting av Nicolai Winther សូវាប់បានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបា Thank you. LAURA and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM and SAM had found their way outside of the Mandalian Empire and to the first city along the coast of the Menagerie Coast, Nicodranas, where Fjord had passed through previously on his various adventures through the waters nearby

and Jester's upbringing was entirely within. You had met, actually, with Jester's mother, Marion, the Ruby of the Sea, as well as begin to seek information about an individual that seemingly was connected with your time up in Shrady Creek Run and the sphere that you had absorbed for it. In this period of time, you discovered

that there was an individual that had grown jealous and strangely aggressive regarding the companionship of Jester's mother, and as such, you begin to seek information about them in a way to put an end to this behavior. In doing so, you went to a tavern, met a captain that had possibly room for a few of you to travel with about a week from now.

You met a tortle, for many of you, the first time you had encountered a tortle who had some interesting things to say and seemingly a lead on the individual you were looking for. You also found information about what's called the Sleuth's Weave, a series of waterways beneath the city where seemingly this Algar, this individual that was

creating tension with the Ruby of the Sea, works and oversees. So you made your way to the outskirts of the docks, search through the water for an entrance, manage to muscle your way through the grates below, nearly drowning the pets you had recently purchased. You encountered a few small water elementals and eventually came upon one of the nexus areas

of this waterway where it seemed there was an elemental entity named Jundi that was bound to this location and was essentially helping run and control the water in and out under the supervision of Algar. Catching them, but however, not being as stealthy as you had hoped, you were noticed, and as such, a battle commenced where this Xundi,

this elemental figure was given the command by Algar to take care of you and see you out. In this fray, a number of you fell and fell again, but through a combination of Fjord's teleportation spell abilities, you guys keeping each other alive, you repeatedly punching very hard whatever got in your way, you manage to subdue Algar, destroy his two guards, raise one as a specter,

and noticing there was something affixed to his wrist that seemed to have some connection with Shun-D, Algar destroys two guards, Rhaes one is a specter, and noticing there was something affixed to his wrist that seemed to have some connection with Shun-D, Fjord cut his left hand off. Damn. And that's where we pick up. So, as the rest of you are slowly pulling your way, your body's just completely waterlogged

from rushing through thigh-high waters and many of you being submerged, nearly drowned at times. You gather yourself as you realize the threat is gone. The Water Elemental is destroyed and this entity that was once attacking you seems to have lowered their trident and turned around their attention elsewhere, releasing any sort of aggressive demeanor they had held since your arrival.

At this time, you, Beau, as you turn the corner and mashed the face of Algar against the wet stone wall, you look over to see both Fjord slice the hand off of his right wrist and- Wait, right or left? Oh, sorry, left hand, sorry. It's to your right. See the left hand get cut off.

He screams out, bleeding from the stump as he grabs it with his other hand. The hand and the bracelet, the armlet that was attached, both clattering to the ground with a wet thud, and then falling over to the side. Beau, you also look over and notice there is this horrible, strange, undead entity floating immediately to your right

of you and Algar, this spectral creature that is ethereal, but made of dark blue and black energy, this drowned spirit that is giving off this horrible, guttural, sucking sound. And Fjord still stands there, blade in hand, looming over the two of you, technically. They're hidden from all the rest of our view. Yeah, you guys, you know where they went,

but you have no idea what's transpired since. Currently, Jundi is floating towards the back of the chamber towards where they are. What do you do? Fjord, he's here with you? Pointing at the spectral guy. He is. So I shouldn't kill him?

I don't think so. Might be unwise. You all right, man? Yeah, I want that bracelet. I'll reach down and pick it up. Okay, you pick the bracelet and Algar's like, I hold it in front of his face. You use this to control that? Make an intimidation check. You pick the bracelet and Algar's like, I hold it in front of his face.

You use this to control that? Make an intimidation check. With advantage. Yeah, so hold him down. That's a 25. It's like, yeah, it was part of my post. What are you going to do? Please don't kill me, please.

It all depends on how forthcoming you are. Anything I need to know to operate this thing, or I just slap it on and start giving commands. At this point, Jundi appears at the back of the chamber, rounding the corner. The large, thick-barrel-chested, somewhat fish-like form, wearing this very, very well-tailored vest in the silks of the shirt, billowing around its wet elemental form, its fish face curled into this sly grin as it spins around and looks towards Algar and you guys,

as it says with its low, burbling fish voice, I see the hour is nigh for vengeance. He goes ahead and pulls the collar from its neck as it clangs to the ground. Ting. Just ask him to put it back on. I'm going to start covering distance. Indeed.

Yeah, where he is now. He puts out his hand. You have seemingly come to the aid of this humble individual. Please, hand me the implements of my enslavement. May I ask how you came to be enslaved in this predicament in the first place? That is not of your concern.

How about an answer for the bracelet? Agar's still like, Don't trust him! I punch him. That's what I can do. Shut up! The rest of you are closing up into space. We're making our way.

You guys leap up and begin to climb. In the meantime, the creature looks to you and says, Let's just say that there were powerful minds that were interested in the benefits of my undivided attention towards things that were of not my interest. I'm sorry to hear that. I never like to see a creature put under the boot

of somebody else for their gain. I'll toss to hear that. I never like to see a creature put under the boot of somebody else for their gain. I'll toss him the bracelet. Catches it, picks up the necklace, and both of them get tucked into this inside of its vest, this heavy, almost wet sucking sound. Looks over to Algar. It would appear that you have was taken care of, but would you do me the honors?

Well. Actually, if you wouldn't mind, we have a further need. A few questions, yeah. Just a conversation, conversation maybe first. Can you wait like five minutes? No, not even just five minutes. Perhaps if you could tell us a safe way out of here in exchange for letting us have our way with Algar.

He could be on his way and we could have our time. I'm confused on the levels in which you're talking about on what all you want, but I'm with it. Yeah, okay. Are you talking to, wait, do we need Algar? But I want to kill Algar. You do want to kill Algar. I do not.

You don't want to kill Algar. Okay, okay, okay. And one sec. Yeah, I'm just saying, so don't kill Algar. I give earmuffs to Algar, as I still have my knee in his face. He is bleeding out. I just want to know if there's other booby traps.

We're all watching. Yeah, you guys all now have come into the chamber now. I'm going to attempt to do that thing I've seen Beauregard do so many times and like foof out my biceps. So what do we do with Algar? I'm not sure yet. By the way, do with Algar? I'm not sure yet. Oh, by the way.

Yep. I think Algar's unconscious. He might be dead. Algar? Yeah. I'll give him a little cheek slap. He's definitely passed out. He's not dead, but there is a large amount of blood

coming out of his severed stump. Yeah. Stand next to Caleb and poke his biceps. What happened? Casting any help? Should we? severed stump. Yeah. Stand next to Caleb and poke his biceps. What happened? Ooh. Casting any help? Shwee, shwee. I'll just tear off a sheet of ribbon off of my sleeve

and I'll wrap it around his forearm, like a tight tourniquet. So make a medicine check. Do you want me to stabilize him? I can do that. Oh, 11. 11, that's enough to stabilize. Okay, so you prevented him from bleeding out.

He looks pale, has lost a lot of blood, and there's this dark pool that's still suffusing the space around him on the stone floor on the raised area of the hallway. So he's stable. At this point, Jundi, as the rest of you came around the corner, and you can see, standing there, look at the group. Well, I have things to take care of now.

He looks to you. Khedive Jundi is my title. I've been held here for too long. Should you find yourself among the endless seas of my world, come to my Silversilk Palace. Silversilk? There I shall reward you for your assistance. Now I'll go to free my partner. Hey, Shunri, real quick.

It just seems like you were powering the entire city. How would we do that without you? That's a good question. And it leaves. Ooh. What was the palace? What did he say? Silver silt. Where was the palace? Is did he say? Silver silt.

Where was the palace, is it in the ocean? I'm pretty sure. Was it in the ocean? Probably not on land, yeah. Is everybody okay, by the way? Do we have every, oh god! And I'm going to cast Turn Undead. Oh! Okay.

To the guy? Yeah. That is a 14. What's your DC? DC on turn undead? Let me find it again. What's your spell DC? Spell DC is a 16.

The specter goes and immediately turns around and starts drifting down the hallway away from you, giving this horrible, hollow, sucking scream. Thank you. Did we need him? Was he useful, too? Nope, nope. I'm so confused on who's useful. I just forgot he was there.

All right, let's, uh. Good job, Mr. Clarke. Everyone's got a minute. Does anybody need healing? Is everybody in? Elgar might need a quick. I have a question. I'm going to start at 10 minutes. Are we going to kill him?

No. Well, if we don't, how do we get away without anyone knowing that we killed his guards and we let the guy go? I don't know. What do you mean? You just tell him, don't tell anyone or we'll come back and kill you. What if he goes into a protection service or something?

Why don't we, we need to have a conversation with him. Afterwards, we can tell him to leave the city and never come back, or we'll take off your other hand. I like that, plus they're guards. It's kind of like their duty to fight, which they did, and we defended ourselves. That's true, that's true. I feel like, you know. I mean, we weren't even going to attack him.

He hadn't attacked us in the first place. Yes! Although, to play devil's advocate, you are right, he could change his mind down the line and try to get revenge on you or your mother. I don't want him to get revenge on my mother. We'll make it pretty clear. We can do other things to make sure.

Can we make it seem like Algar was the one that did all this? Yep. Okay, okay. Like maybe he turned? Did he see you? Does he know who you are? No. Well then why would he connect any of this to his mother? Unless we tell him.

To your mother, I mean. Well, just because I heard Tracy say that she was staying at the fancy, the lavish chateau. Yeah, but. That's a hotel that lots of Tracys, I think, probably stay at. If you want to be really careful, there are other places to stay.

I'm also curious to know what he is doing down here in the first place. I might have wanted to use him again. Why don't you step aside so that he doesn't see your face when he wakes up? Or disguise your face so he has. Oh, good call, good call. But I would like to just throw my hat in the ring

to say that I think he might need to die here, yeah. Okay, so we got two kills. What if we make him send him out to sea, don't necessarily kill him, but make him leave, and then make it seem like he was the one that did everything. I think we're going to listen to your influence on this one, Jester.

It is closest to you. We do have one passage secured with Captain Adela. We could just tell Adair, wait, what's his name? Algar. Algar, that's Pillars of Eternity. We could just tell Alair, wait, what's his name? Algar. Algar? That's Pillars of Eternity. We could just tell Algar, you have a new plot in life now and it's going to be to help Captain Adela.

And Yasha, oh wait, is Yasha going with Adela? No. No. She's on a different boat, maybe. Well, Yasha's with you. No, I know, but she's going to be leaving at some point soon, right? She was making her way towards the sea, but hasn't made passage anywhere.

No plan, no hard plan. Let's wake up this son of a bitch. We can always kill him. Yeah, we'll get answers. First case scenario, we kill him. Maybe best case scenario, but yes. Put a pin in it and see what we find out here. Do you want to disguise yourself before we do this?

I will disguise myself as a tortle, but not the guy that we met, like a tortle that's like a girl. Okay. A tortle? Period. Yeah, I was like. Like a gordle.

Exactly the same as the guy, except with long hair. No, no hair. Like a beehive. But like a skirt, a skirt. There you hair. No, no hair. Like a beehive. But like a skirt, a skirt. There you go. Yeah, because that's what girls wear, skirts, obviously. That's what girls do.

Jester needs to get out more. Turtles wear skirts. Okay, at some point, there's going to be a healing spell. I am still, okay, so I get back on top of Aldar and I'm restraining him, pinning him down. Does anybody not need healing? I'm... Well, Herkley, do you need healing?

Okay, that's what we'll do then. I could use some healing. What about yourself? Oh, I'm getting enough. Oh, I could do... I could use some, if you're sharing. You could do a prayer of healing. I'm doing, that was what I've been doing,

a prayer of healing. Make it rain. We could both do prayers of healing. I'm doing a, that was what I've been doing, a prayer of healing. Make it rain. We could both do prayers of healing. Yeah, take it. All right, so I'm doing everybody except Nott, and I'm adding Nott to this, okay. I'm going to say I'm doing it too, but I'm not really going to.

On the count of three, one, two. That's 14 points, 14 points to everybody. Dear Traveler, please heal everyone. Do you guys feel better? I do, actually. Thank you. How many points? 14. Thanks, Mr. Clay and Jester.

You're welcome. All right. As the wave of healing divine energy emanates from Clay's focus point, Algar, who's still being held against the wall by Beau. I'll just bring the tip of the falchion right under his chin. You know, before we begin,

we got this thing about calling out, yelling, really sensitive eardrums, so let's not do that. Also, before we begin, I want to make sure that you know how serious we are in getting honesty from you. I take his head and I go whack whack into the wall. Back of the crutches. I'm going to do Extort Truth on him. Ooh!

Spin to keep point. Okay, all right. So he has to make a Curse of the Saving Threat. That is 14. 14 is the DC. Okay, so he succeeds. Fucking fuck! You can try it again if you have another key point.

I do. I can also cast Zone of Truth. Wait, let me see if I think he might be immune to it for the next 24 hours based on the ability. Was it mine? If he succeeds on it, yeah. I think so. Well then, I go to, I don't think you heard me, whack whack! I'm going to try it one more time. Well, I'm going to double check here, I go to, I don't think you heard me. Whack, whack! I'm going to try one more time. Well, I'm going to double check here,

but I think if he succeeds in the save, he's immune to it for 24 hours. I could be wrong. Let me double check here. Has it been 24 hours yet? Yeah, you can wait 24 hours and then come back to it. Let's just sit here until Crash Bandits time. I'll lean over to Nott and say, Nott, do me a favor

and just make sure he's not carrying anything fancy in his pockets. I'm going to rifle through all of his pockets with lightning speed agility of hand. Make an investigation check, please. Not good. No. 12. 12, okay.

Rifling through his bits, you find 21 gold pieces, 45 silver pieces, two platinum pieces. All right. You find one empty glass vial where a healing potion was used previously, a dagger, and a hand crossbow, a basic hand crossbow with five bolts. All right, I'll take the gold and the bolts,

and everything else I'll throw in a puddle. Perfect. What about, does he have any pretty buttons? Does he have any pretty buttons, Matthew? Uh, he does, attached to the shirt, if you want to pluck them. I will pluck the buttons. There are six buttons.

Do I have to roll for each one? No, you're fine. To extort truth, no, you can continue to try it if you want to. Try it again. Spam it. Whack, no. You can continue to try it if you want to. Try it again. Spam it. Whack, whack. All right, so, as with every more button pulled,

button, button, teaming up on this regard. Real serious, real serious. Okay, that's a failure. That's a natural 10. Okay, so as you slam his head two more times and pinch an area underneath the bottom of the jaw that causes his irises to swell for a little bit, he looks towards you, head lolling a little bit.

Now you're going to answer all these nice man's questions, okay? He doesn't answer, but you have his attention. What was your job down here, and why were you giving commands to that creature with his bracelet? It's my job. I was assigned as the supervisor of the Sluice Gate.

And who do you report to? I report to the Clovis Concord. I was assigned here maybe a few months back from Port Zune, but I largely, specifically, report to the Marquis and his associates. Marquis? The Marquis, The Marquis the...

Marquis Zefuludan. Oh. That guy, right? The palis guy? Yeah. Not love to pull a. Right. Domain. Domain, right. Fjord, ask him if knowledge of what a creature

that was here and is gone now, if that is known all the way to the top, or is it his bag, or? The creature that was here and the magic used to control him, is that something that you brought to the table, or was that a device given to you and known in the higher ranks of government?

He's resisting answering. I just dig that finger into his pressure point a little harder. Make an intimidation check. With advantage, because you have him affected with the historic. Oh, right, Crisp. 11. 11, okay. In his current position, like. The Magrav and the Concord are aware

this is one of two cities that runs with one of these marid underneath. One of two cities? Yes. And the other would be? Port Damali. Right. What else do you do here in Nicodranas? What do you do to pass the time, Algor?

I'm trying to decide whether or not to hand you over to this fearsome beast over here, and I'll point to Caleb. The muscles popping? Yeah. Yeah, and I send Frumpkin, who's holding his breath, schlooping up on top of his chest. He's hungry, and so am I.

Oh, jeez. He puts the lotion on the skin. I make you into a jacket. I drink and cruise, buy fine linens and furniture. I... It's good hobbies. Yeah, he's asked what he does with his spare time.

Do you have any significant others in the city? None, none really. I take companions. Ruby is, Ruby is a very beautiful creature. Woo, Ruby, she's real hot. Agreed, I think we all know the Ruby of the Sea far and wide. You think she'd miss you if you went missing?

A few more weeks of wooing her. Yes. No, that's not how that shit works, man. Yeah. You can see there's a conflict inside where his masculine pride immediately hits with the hit to his ego that you just delivered. What?

What were you doing down here? My job. What is your job, exactly? To maintain the weave, to help exert my will on the creature that you just freed so it can direct water towards the various furnaces that run a lot of the engines that help maintain some of the commerce

here in the city. Yeah, and what happens to the commerce in the city now that you have fucked that up? Well, I fucked it up. Well, thanks to your interference here, they're probably going to have to re-network everything through analog means. It'll take weeks, it'll be expensive.

Oh man, you're going to be in so much trouble. Especially, I imagine, if they start looking into everything you did with that kind of power, I mean, having access to that kind of creature. I can't imagine that you were on the up and up about everything you did. Especially if you start to admit that you did it all yourself, and I'll use Mask of Many Faces

to look just like him. People are going to have to start asking questions. Serious questions. You hear his head hit the stone once more, it's like, who the fuck are you? Who the fuck are you? Make an intimidation check with advantage. So badass!

19. He looks down at his severed hand, the stump having now healed over from the healing power of your prayer. He's like, look, just please, I don't want to die down here. I don't want to wash up in the middle of the shore. You know what I'm feeling like, Beau?

That I just need to get out of this city and never come back. Go somewhere far away, and I hold up also a stump, because my hand is missing. I just need to go in a boat and just go. Man, that sounds like a fine idea, Algar, doesn't it? Frumpkin starts to lovingly gnaw with his beak just on the chin of the owl guy.

That sounds like a great idea. Maybe a haircut, maybe a new name, too. What do you think? Man, you look like a Jorge. Jorge. I'm going to pick up the severed hand and start casting Decompose on it, too. I'm going to start backing up,

just shaking my head. You people are fucked up. He nods. Right, yeah. I'll leave immediately. Just please, please let me go. All depends on how we decide to act as we get out of here. I'm sure you know a very safe way to the surface, yes?

Same way I come in every day. Yeah, I'll show you up. Shall we? Mm-hmm. What do we do with him so nobody sees him? Must have a bag or something. Just walk out with a handless bagged man. Yasha, what's in your bag you've been carrying? Well, it's not on her, it's up in the boat

you guys had put in the water. She goes, mostly just blankets. I have a cloak. Yeah, yeah, we can wrap him up in a cloak and just carry him out like we're carrying some equipment. Okay. I mean, all right. Shit, I forgot to do that.

How do you remember to do that? He does it sometimes. So, Algar, you're going to be very helpful when it comes to making sure Algar knows who to talk to and the right things to say to get us out, right? Right. Oh, I'm sorry, Jorge. Jorge.

Yeah. He's still trying to pull away from the horrible, slow sucking of the tentacles wrapping around the neck, and there's a beak. I'm just going to pull out. The tentacles wrapping around the neck and there's a slight biting right there. I'm going to pull out my disguise kit and just give him a nice little beard and a mustache. And an eye patch. So he sits there, held to the wall,

being chewed on by a tiny octopus for the next 30 minutes while you go ahead and roll. Okay, go ahead and roll for your disguise kit. Children's birthday party Nick Fury. Do I roll with advantage? No, with advantage, you get proficiency bonus. So go to 1d20, add your dexterity modifier. Plus proficiency, 20.

Algar looks like a weirder uncle of Algar. Could probably pass for a Jorge, sure. Yeah, yeah. That's better. But he looks different and is missing a hand, so it's definitely not Algar. Mm-hmm. Jorge, any traps, contraptions we should be aware of

as we're heading out? No, no traps. There are some lockdown fail safes, but there's not much help at the moment. How far away is the other container for the other, I assume, creature under the same sort of restraints that we saw here? He mentioned going to free his compatriot?

His partner in Port Damali, Fjord. I thought they were two under Nicodranas. I bet it's his partner in Port Damali, Fjord. Oh, I thought they were two under Nicodranas. I bet it's his partner in Port Damali. He gives you a look that doesn't nod, but you can see from his recognition that you hit the nail on the head. Hard to nod with a knocker. It's the accent, it makes me smarter.

Damn, I was okay with the rolling blackouts in Nicodranas, but two cities? I feel a little worse. Yeah, I know, right? A little worse. It's okay. I'll figure it out. Whole eastern seaboard is just shut down. There's a mage tower that goes up and down.

This place will be fine. What do you get for over-investing in genie-based power? Technology, yeah. Well, Jorge, why don't you show us the way out? He looks to Beau to be let up, because he's still being pressed. Oh, I know, it's so obnoxious when someone's like, just have their hands on you when you don't want it, isn't it? Okay, let's go.

He gets up, still looking over the missing hand and back at the rest of you and begins to slump his way further down the hallway where they were heading to exit. So you're following him down this path. He's using a small torch that he lit for light to make his way down here and as he leads you through, it opens up into a few other small chambers that have some tables and chairs. You can see there's a number of

weapons, close quarters, smaller weapons for any sort of combat that may take place in a tunnel. You can see there is a small sketch, it looks like, with charcoal or some sort of a darker chalk on the wall that outlines the layout of the sluice weave for those that are coming in to see where they're trying to go and get to. Take a good long look at it. Okay. Great, now I have to remember that as well.

Yeah, yeah you do. It's part of it now. Pre-dick or post-dick? It's in. It's in. It's in. Is it in? The free dick is always in. Yeah.

There you go. Eventually, he leads you to a spiral staircase that goes upwards. There are two sets of iron barred doors he has the keys to. He opens them, leads you in. You do notice on the way through that there are a couple of archways leading from chamber to chamber where there are gated portcullis

doorways that would collapse down. You can see there are switches on the opposite side as a means of defense if things were to go wrong to back up, back up. But once you have him under your control, he has no means of doing so, and you watch him very carefully. Heading up the spiral staircase, it leads you to a trapdoor that he stair leads up to. He pushes it open quietly, and it leads you into what looks like a small office.

It's got a small desk, it's got a stool, it's got some odd stacks of paper, looks like there's a quill in an unopened inkwell. There's some partially melted candles that aren't lit at the moment, and there is a door that exits. He goes ahead and unlocks that door. Just a moment. We're going to need those keys. I'm going to grab the ink, too. And rifle through the papers on the desk. I'm sure it goes without saying that once you leave this place, if you yell or act a fool in any way, we will tear you asunder before you can say,

Ow! I understand. Do you still look like him? Yeah. Wait, wait, is this your office? This is my office, yeah. People will know this is your office? The few that I work with, yes.

Got it, thank you. I mean, got it, thank you. Caleb, did you find anything? I don't Caleb, did you find anything? I don't know, did I find anything? Make an investigation check. Yeah, okay. Ooh. 10.

You glance through quickly, a lot of it appears to be notes on repairs, on how best to organize the time that the Marid has, and how many, there is an actual breakdown in how often it can summon elementals and control them. You find some things that talk about a Marid defense of the city, meaning there is a plan in place that if ever the city

were under attack from the sea, that it was one of their secret weapons to defend the city from ships. That's the most you can find. Those are all the surface things that you see on the desk, but the rest of it doesn't seem to make much sense or pertain to anything important to you. Hey, Jorge.

Sorry. Oh, go ahead, no. Are any of these letters written by you? A few of them. It points to a couple. Come in and take one in, yeah, yeah, study it. Are you right-handed or left-handed? Well, now he's right-handed. Yeah, he should.

But two hours ago, were you right-handed or left-handed? I was left-handed. Ooh. That's a bitch. That's okay, I'm left-handed. Is there anywhere in this, I'm looking for anywhere where there might be a secret stash or some sort of, something that looks off-kilter or a little odd in here,

somewhere where he might be hiding something. Make an investigation? Yeah. Sif. No. Looks like an office. I'm going to go. Sif. No. Looks like an office. All right. What do you guys think?

I feel like I need to partake on this voyage today, don't you think? Like almost A-S-A-F-P. Right? The weather's kind. It was a nice day earlier. Seize the moment. I think so.

Walk him out and make sure that he gets on the boat. You want to do that? Well, I got to write some shit in this office, but it's up to y'all. Maybe Beau and myself could go? Yeah, maybe our tortle friend here can just leave a little note in your stead. Says that you're moving on.

Yeah, it's fine. Are there any favorite buzzwords of yours? Something that would sound like you? How do you normally sound like this? Lone Star. Yeah, I love Lone Star. Like a Lone Star. Are you a sincerely type person, or a love, love Algar?

His stare is far off in the distance. He's looking down the barrel of a gun and a complete shift in his life that he wasn't expecting to take immediately. So his responses are very one word and very like, no. Shouldn't have been a dick. Well, all right, I'm sure. It's probably a sincerely.

Sincerely, yes. It's sad, it's very sad. So sad that he had to sit down and write a letter about how he had to leave the city and how he had to free the creature beneath the city because it was so wrong. Tell him all these things, I totally plan on doing that shit.

Yes, I am. Get out of here before we talk about it. He's leaving. Get him out! Let's go! Okay, we'll go. We'll meet up with you guys. Yeah, we'll see you back at the fair, or something. Yeah, I don't know. You got him. Sure, tortle.

Okay. So yeah, you escort him to the wharf. As a sailor, you know specifically who to talk to to secure passage under the table. Where do you want to send him? I don't know anything about the outside world. Where's Farr? Yeah.

He's joking, he's like, Lynch Shore. It's a good summer stay away. Lay out on the glass. Yeah. Somewhere in Tal'Dorei. Yeah, somewhere in, yeah. I mean, Marquette is far.

Let's do it, sounds good. It's very far. I heard a traveler talking about Whitestone. I don't think it has a shore. Well, I don't know, I just heard do it. Sounds good. It's very far. I heard a traveler talking about Whitestone. I don't think it has a shore. Well, I don't know. I just heard about it. I don't know anything about it. There's Stilben, right? Which was on the coast? That's one of the major coastal cities

on the eastern side of Tethyre, yeah. I hear Opeth is a sweet Airbnb on one island. Let's send him to Marquette. Marquette. Marquette it is. That's where Adel is going. There you go. All right, so because it's a longer journey, it's a little more expensive,

but you can secure passage for him to Marquette, we'll say for 20 gold. I'll sponsor that journey. Nice. We'll give him a little spending cash, make sure he's not completely destitute when he gets there. That seems nice. Did we take the money that was on him?

Yeah, we did, but we'll flip him back. I may have taken the money that was on him. You want to flip him back one of those platinums? Sure. Here you go. Not, I'm sorry, Jorge is one platinum. And five copper. Look at the way it's.

Look at the way it is. The beard's feeling a little bit, but he's just staring at the coin in his palm. All right, let me get that for you. It's okay. God, we're mean. He was a bad person. Oh yeah. We, we're mean. He was a bad person. Oh yeah.

We didn't kill him. I let him live, it's really nice. Thanks, deuce. Yeah. So. So we're going to try to take him to Adela or just any boat? Any boat. Just any boat.

Yeah, Adela leaves in a little under a week. But you can secure passage today on a small ship that's heading back to Marquet. So yeah, you send him off on his way. You wait another hour or so to make sure that the ship disembarks and he doesn't abscond from the ship itself. He watches it, begins to make its way towards the horizon.

You feel confident that he's not going to be coming back anytime soon. That ring of keys that he gave us, how about approximately how many keys are on that thing? Eight. Eight. I need to write a letter about, okay, what should I say? Like, I hate this city.

I want everyone to suffer what I feel in my heart. Sick of you people pushing me around. I hate this city. I want everyone to suffer what I feel in my heart. Sick of you people pushing me around. I'm sick of all you people pushing me around. I'm freeing this djinn, and I'm setting sail for another land. How about all of that? Yes, and I plan to betray all of the city secrets

to your foes if I ever return. It'll be very smart to kill me on sight. That's probably good. That's maybe a, that's gilding the lily, perhaps. Okay, well. I like betraying you to all your foes' part. I got away scot-free. Lots of middle fingers, you will never catch me alive.

Your city is shit. I'm going to burn all of my fellow guards with a large fireball first. Yeah, I'm going to say, I'm going to say. We can take care of the guards tomorrow. Well, no, because. They're going to find some charred bodies and stuff. If the djinn got away, then maybe the djinn did it, you know?

With fire? With that creature? Yeah, yeah, yeah. How'd that fire happen, though? Here's a question. Did you dismiss your specter, or do you have a... I didn't dismiss it. Yeah, so as you guys are...

He's just running around in terror. As you're leaving, the area right behind you is this . What do you do with it? What do you mean, as we go outside, outside? Yeah, following you. You're leaving the area right behind you is this. What do you do with it? What do you mean, as we go outside, outside? Yeah, following you. Go back inside the room, go back inside the room. You guys at this point begin to watch

as that same drowned specter is now coming back behind you. Oh god, turn undead. It turns right around and runs off a bit. Wait, turn undead really just turns an undead around? Yes. It's frightened of them and runs away. It's just a remote control car spin. Unless you're high enough level and then it.

I'm not quite at the pop it. It's too strong for me to pop, right? Correct. And it doesn't last a long while. So a short time passes. So we're going to see this letter, and I'm leaving it in its office, yeah? Yeah, we're still in the office, are we not?

Well, technically we have left. We are here. While Jester is writing, I would like to flip this office for anything of value. You already have. Oh, just the papers? Well, you've checked around for anything that'd be interesting. Excellent.

Yeah, there's, other than the inkwell and the things that was there. Well, what if he accidentally lost control of the creature and then ran, oh, turn undead! How many time, how many channel divinities can you do? I might be out. I was about to say, don't I have it, yeah. I feel like I might be out. I was about to say, don't I have it?

I feel like I might be out. I think you were out actually the last time. Okay, that's fine, I'm out. Let's say you took a short rest. Yeah. So I wandered back into the chamber and I'm just looking at Fjord. Oh yeah, no, I'm out.

Do we have two channel divinities or just one at this level? Do you have groupies? Then I turn and then. Thank you. Turns around and starts running away. I really feel like you could do something about this. We ran away because he lost control

and he doesn't want to be held accountable for his actions. Oh, that's true. What do you guys think? Okay, so Jus has a really good idea. So maybe instead of we say, go fuck yourself, all of that, what if we say, it's really strong, we have this version of his letter right here. So draft number two. Draft number two.

What if we say, oh no, I lost control of the genie and now I am so scared I'm running away. I mean, he strikes me as the sort of person who doesn't want to be held responsible. Would you stop to write a letter? I probably wouldn't write that. That might be his attempt to say, I did this, I'm sorry, bye, kind of thing.

Yeah, remember, we don't want him to like him when he comes back. Well, they're not, they're people dead down there. Respecter returns, as you guys are having this conversation. I can't do anything! Oh boy. I try to attack it. All right, go ahead and make him attack.

I'll Sacred Flame him. Okay. Do you guys remember in Tomb Raider 2, the butler that you had? That's 12. So it takes him. That's basically what this is. Oh my god. Oh, that's, what does that, 11?

I was trying to cheat on you. 11 radiant damage. 11 points of radiant damage, all righty. Oh god, Sacred Flame. Success. So fruit points. This is such a strange thing. It's not attacking anyone.

Oh, it's not? It's not assaulting you guys. It's just standing there and taking the hits and just looking in pain, and it keeps just looking for Fjord. You can go. All right. He just disperses into shadow and vanishes. We're time jumping.

Me and Marisha took Jorge to the docks with the promise that Fjord would come later and join us. But he was the one who had all the sailor tricks to get the towed sailor trips. This was me realizing that this would have happened earlier, so we're just taking care of it now, okay? Because this would have been followed, I forgot about the specter briefly earlier,

and this would have happened. I like that he just takes responsibility for everything that happened down there. I like it better when he's saying fuck yourself. No, that's not in order. I appreciate that they've completely glossed over this scenario. That's very fair. I think we should stick with glossed over this scenario. That's very fair.

I think we should stick with the go fuck yourself version and say I intentionally, he intentionally let him go and he knew that he was going to fuck over the city. I agree with your gesture. I think we should stick with go fuck yourself. Okay. Sincerely. I mean, I don't really know if I'm here right now, so. No, don't go.

We'll say you guys are all together. That sounds good. Christ, it's a letter. Just fucking write it and send it. I'm leaving it in the office for. Okay. Like something like choke upon your woe. Choke upon your woe.

Or eat fecal matters. Eat fecal matters. Eat fecal matter, question mark? Signed, Algon. Go ahead and roll for your forgery, kid. Yes, roll with proficiency. With proficiency, so d20 plus, I'll say this is your intelligence.

Do you want to look at the? Yeah, yeah. Don't take a hedron first. Oh yeah, I do, I do. Before you write this letter, let's time jump again. Before the letter. Before you write the letter. I vote this.

Okay, so you have a fragment of possibility. So, okay. So depending on how I roll, I can roll again? Yep. You take a hit of the dodek. And that's dexterity plus proficiency? I'm saying because it's a forgery and it's having to pay attention to details, I'm going to say intellect.

Did you roll twice? Really? Yeah. Did you roll twice? No, I didn't roll twice. Okay. You don't have to roll twice. You don't have to spend it if you don't want to. I'm going to spend it, just in case. 19 plus. Proficiency bonus is just your initiative?

No, there's a plus three, I think. So 22. 22, pretty good forgery, you're proud of yourself. It looks pretty spot on based on his handwriting. You followed his cadence, his sentence structure, signature looks incredible. The dicks look like his dicks that you draw. Press on the dicks, actually, yeah, that's really.

Yes. All right, I'm leaving this on his desk. Should you put it on the door with a dagger? Ooh! With his dagger. That is really good. With his, I left his dagger, shit! I could go back down the hall and get it!

No. Let's just maybe tape it. I have extra daggers, do you want a dagger? I have three extra daggers. Oh, he had a quill, didn't he? Yeah. Zoom, with that quill! Yeah, it's really paper.

I'll say with your strength, you can easily do so. It'll break the quill, technically, but it still pierces it to the door. I feel like it really sends a message. Just as threatening as a dagger. Yeah, it's super detracting. It's a feather. Cool, so the letter's complete, it's placed.

Should we go back down and escape the other way so nobody sees? Oh, I guess you guys already left. We already left. We're taking Jorge to the docks, right? No, we're all back together now. I'm going to go retrieve the boat. We go to the docks?

Yes, we're, okay. This is my fault for forgetting one feature earlier and trying to just fit it into the narrative here. Order of business. You arrived. You forged the letter. We forged it. You saw a weird undead thing again that was following you and then Fjord

made it go away with a hand wave. You then took Jorge to the docks and sent him on his way. Great. There you go. On the docks? You guys are near the docks and sent him on his way. Great! There you go. You guys are near the docks. You've made your way out. That's easy. There you go. What do we do with Jorge?

No kidding. Well, I feel like that went about as well as it could have. Yeah. I think I should go get the boat. Yeah. I'm going to head towards where we anchored the boat. Okay, it's still there floating. You can see there's one fisherman

who's just eyeing it furiously. I'm going to cast Comma Motions on myself and go swim to the boat. Okay. Go ahead and make your way out. Get up inside of it and begin to row yourself back to the edge of the dock. There, not far away, is the old fisherman

that you had spoken to earlier that you had borrowed it from. You gather your things out of it and he comes over and is like, Well, I appreciate you bringing this back. It's no problem. I think I've had enough ocean for a while. That was a... No such thing, no such thing.

Have a good day. You too, Tall One. What do we do now? I turn around and I look at the city. Do I notice commerce? Yeah, do I notice? Does it look like things are slowing down? Are we now Bane?

Well, that was a garbage roll. Seven. That's terrible. It looks like the city. At this point in the day, it's getting a garbage roll. Seven. That's terrible. It looks like the city. I mean, at this point in the day, it's getting a little later, the sky is starting to get a bit...

Maybe the oranges of dusk are starting to peak in a little bit. You maybe have another hour or so of daylight. Do I see Merpahl anywhere? Make a perception check. See who? Mer-Paul, that guy that I flirted with. 11. Currently, no. You don't see him anywhere.

Thank god. All right. We could go back to Jester's mom and report. We could go to that tower and investigate it. We could do both. We could. I'll admit, I'm a little tired. That was a lot. We also wanted to check into, did we want to try and be at the docks at midnight?

Oh, to meet Marius? Just, yes. Hangs out at the docks at midnight. And then does Marius know Sabian and Cabaniss? That's unclear at this point, isn't it? Is he always there at midnight? Do you have that letter by the way? Who has that?

The letter? The letter that mentions Marius the Clod. Is he there every midnight or just tonight midnight? I don't know. Because if we wait until tomorrow, I can Zone of Truth him. Orly said he likes to hang out around the docks at midnight to look for work or something.

Yeah, Kael would remember that, too. I don't, but. Yeah, yeah. Occasionally he's out there looking for work or something. Yeah, Caleb would remember that, too. I don't. Yeah, yeah. I mean, he occasionally is out there looking for work. That's as much as Orly knew. Okay. What's Sabian's? Marius.

No, Fjallraven. In Sabian, we've heard about, through Orly, right? No, Sabian you heard about through Fjord. Through what Fjord? Yeah, but didn't we talk to Captain Adela and someone gave us the news of the order? You got some information about Sabian, yes. That they were doing the Widow's Embrace thing

and that they're pirates. Yeah, that was through Captain Adela. That was through Adela, okay, okay, okay, okay, sorry. Let's make our way back towards the... Lavish Chateau? Yep. I got to take more organized notes. Maybe we can stop by that fancy tower on the way back. I am very interested in that tower,

but I would love to ask some more questions around town before assailing it. Sure, about what time is it? It's close to dusk. Oh. About an hour from daylight left. Right, you said that. We go towards the Lavish Chateau.

Yeah, it's the town my mother used to be in. Yeah. We'll go to the Lavish Chateau and we'll just walk by the tower on our way back to give it another look-see. Okay, it's a little bit of a roundabout walk, but you can do it. Okay. All right, so you make your way back to the open quay.

Heading towards the tower. You can see, as you approach, based on whatever illusory enchantment finds your vision, you can see as it seems to almost grow, the closer you get to it, to the point where it's massively towering when you're right below it, still no sign of a door at first glance. You still have the 20-foot-up or so balcony

and a few other windows up that way. You can see the top two windows have, now that it's gotten dark, you can see there's a little bit of a firelight glow at the very top of it. Have I ever read about anything like this, a building that seems to shift in size? Make an arcana check.

Can I look around and see if the city seems like it's being affected at all by the no power? Same thing I rolled on the last check. Make a perception check. Modifier of 10. 10? You assume it's either some sort of spatial enchantment to it, or it's an illusion, maybe. That's as much as you can make out from it.

Okay. Natural 20. Natural 20. The city doesn't appear to be heavily changed by any means. I think it's fine. You do notice that, where previously there were some plumes of white smoke or steam that rose from certain

more industrial aspects of the city, are much thinner. They appear to be more of just residual columns of steam and smoke. Oh god, oh god, oh god. Probably fine. Oh no. oh god, oh god. It's probably fine. Oh no. Okay. No bigs.

So, you're at the tower, the Tide Peak Tower. Anything you want to do? I'm tapped, I can't do anything. Yeah, we looked at it. So you boys just wanted to come look at the tower again because you like it. Yeah. Don't look at me.

We just see if it changed or if anything's different or if we see a mysterious figure in a window. There's no windows. It doesn't bother you that it grows taller as you get closer? It's pretty freaky. No doors. Oh, it's fascinating. We learned that whoever owns this place

owns the district, isn't that correct? Yeah. So someone in this district probably knows something about the person who owns the district. It's Usa Arenas, right? Usa Arenas. Usa. Hey, Caleb. Yeah?

You memorized the map of the Underground Pathways, right? Correct. Do any of them run under this tower? Well, there was no marking for a tower. Beautiful mind techniques? No idea. Make an intelligence check to see if you can overlay the memory of the sketch you saw

with the location of the crowd. So just raw intelligence? Yep. That is, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, 16. 16. You feel like you've been able to take the two and map them together pretty well. Nothing that passes directly beneath the tower, though. The sluice isn't a wide network. It's a handful of deliberately placed tunnels

to make their way towards specific parts of different districts. That diagram was not elaborate enough for me to know the answer to that. Okay, let's go to Lava Chateau. Mm-hmm. All right, by the time you make it to the Lava Chateau, it is sunset, the last bit of light that vanishes over

the horizon, far over the ocean, the Lucidian Ocean in the distance. You make your way to the interior, where a number of folks have finally gathered. Maybe a handful, six or seven people are already in there enjoying meals, having drinks. You know that there isn't a performance tonight, but people are in there enjoying the relatively and comparably classy atmosphere as the familiar band plays their music. What do you want to do? I also used another Disguise self-spell

to make sure I stayed. Good call. Totally. Yeah. Seeily. Yeah. I'm going upstairs to see your mom. Yeah, I promise you, Tela. I spiffed up my clothing again as well. Okay.

How do we get upstairs with you all tortily? Just go upstairs. All right. Let's go upstairs. Okay, I go upstairs. All right. You guys make your way up to the third flight. You missed him last time,

but you come upon a familiar sight. You, which was your mother's personal bodyguard for half of the time at the Chateau Blued. Blued! Which was also responsible at times to watch you and escort you when you went to the city. The rest of you are caught off guard by the sight of this massive dual-horned minotaur.

Oh shit. Wearing a very, very fine shirt, but is Donald ducking it the rest of the way. Thankfully, relatively thick fur down there, so you have to pry to get a good look. But is standing there, arms crossed, and just goes, Oh, Jester. Comes over and takes a look.

Actually, no, he wouldn't recognize you because you're a tortle. But doesn't he know that I am Jester still? Not unless you say anything. Blud. It's me. Now we go into the whole Jester. There we go, that's the moment. My twirling eyebrows are going.

Right, right. So much timeline jumping. This one's name is Blut. His name is Blut. Not Blut, but Blued. With a D. With a D, okay. Blued. We're here to see Mama.

Of course, I assume that is the case. Knocks on the door. At that point, the door opens up a bit and peeking through is the Ruby of the Sea, Marion, who, hair is perfectly curled, even without an evening performance, smiles at the sight of all of you at the door and looks curiously at the large large skirt-faring tortle.

Hello? Hi, do you have company? Not at the moment, no. Can we come in and talk to you for just a second? Oh, Jester. Hi. Please do come inside, everyone, come on. You all make your way into the chamber.

I'll drop the disguise spell once we're inside. Okay. She shoos out her servants, the door closes. Oh, this is Yasha? Is she my Yasha? She is not. She's like, oh my goodness, it's so nice to meet you, Yasha. She shakes her head and Yasha awkwardly,

Hi. And just looks to the rest of you and leans towards the back wall and crosses her arms. Not one for social graces, necessarily. But seemingly looking at Marion, looking at Jester, looking at Marion, can see the relation. Marion sits down in front of her mirror and her little table set up in the corner

and spins back towards the rest of you. So, welcome back. There is no performance tonight, I apologize, but if you would like us to provide food for you or whatever you like, please, do not bother to let me know. So you know that guy? There are a number of guys that I know, yes.

The guy that was bugging you? Algar, yes. We went to go talk to him, but he had already left. He left? Yes, he had fled the city, apparently. Things happened there real bad or something, I don't know. Huh. Well, that may very well be a great turn of luck,

and my benefit, definitely. Thank you for looking into that. Of course, yeah, we were going to talk to him and everything, but he's gone, so. Well, I, uh... That makes me feel more comfortable. Thank you very much. Of course. I appreciate that.

Do you guys want to eat anything? Yes, I do! Yeah, very well. Anything would be really delicious. I will ensure that you are all properly taken care of this night. She goes ahead and brings the servants back in. A meal is placed for the rest of you,

and as the evening progresses and you take a bit of time to rest, you're Going to take a short rest? Yes, yeah, you're going to take a short rest, and you guys manage to enjoy probably one of the better meals you've had in a while. Jester, why did you lie to your mom? Yeah.

Is my mom still in this room? We're whispering, she can't hear us. Look, here's the thing. You guys are eating downstairs. They're not bringing room service up into her chambers. Oh, so we're no longer with Matt. Not at the moment, no. Okay. Look, I don't want her getting in trouble

for anything that happened. Why would she get in trouble? We do. I don't want her getting in trouble for anything that happened. Why would she get in trouble? We do this. I don't know. The less she knows, the better. What if she found out something and she judged me for it because we did something bad? What if she finds out you lied to her and judges you for that?

Why would she find out? You know, I had the same thought, but really, either she believes Jester and no big deal, or she doesn't believe Jester and knows that it's taken care of. You should never lie to your mother. Well, I usually don't. It's just to protect her.

It is a white lie. All right. You hear the heavy footfalls of Bluud making his way down the stairs and goes and finds a corner just to keep an eye. Then Marion, now dressed in her casual evening gown, which in itself is still regal and beautiful and trails behind her up the stairs as she descends, comes to join you at the table and sits and smiles to the rest of you and gives a renewed nod to Yasha, whom she just met. Well, I am very happy to see that you've made

a good group of friends, a travel family. Just warms my heart. Yeah. Yep. Is everything all right? Yeah. Yeah. Um. Is everything all right? Yeah. Oh, is it bad? What did I do? You didn't do anything, you didn't do anything. No, we were, this is very good that we.

Jester feels like perhaps that she is imposing bringing us, all of us here, and we were trying to convince her that that is silly. Not in the slightest, Jester. This is not imposition. I'm just happy to have you home for a bit. I'm happy to be home for a bit. How long do you intend to stay? Oh, well, I don't know.

We're here for Fjord, really, so it's up to him. That's not true. This is your home. It's where you're from. But weren't you trying to find out about the guys? It's up to him. That's not true, this is your home, it's where you're from. But weren't you trying to find out about the guys? We have time. Fjord swallowed a ball and it's inside of him now

and he doesn't know what is going on, so. We're going to tell the truth about that. No. I have a friend who had a similar problem years ago. If you would like, there is a physician we could have take a look at you and see if we can find a way to no longer have that problem. Oh man, I want to hear that story.

I would be glad to. Mama, it's not that kind of a problem. You have a friend who swallowed a stone? Frawl of Awe, you have such a lovely daughter. She's so charming and such a spitfire. It has been such a pleasure to get to know her. I've been curious for weeks now, almost months, isn't it? I think it's almost months, what she was like as a child,

because she's such a joy now. Young Jester was rambunctious, curious, ever running off, getting into, well, trouble, and finding trouble, making trouble. For me, it was a joy. She was very quick to learn, ever smiling, brightening any chamber she walked into. She had a good sense for who needed to be

taken down a peg. So she was always a prankster? Very much so. More so around adolescence, I think. Yeah, I guess so. But she's always been sweet, inspirational. Very sweet. See, she am very sweet. Very proud of her.

Do you have any good embarrassing stories? Yeah. Yes, but not anything I can speak of in mixed company. Are we in mixed company? You guys are in the downstairs in the main tavern area of the chateau. Right. Didn't need to come down here very much and eat with you, so it's nice to be able to be here now.

Am I angry? Stop this, guys. Fuck, I need to remember to do this more. Oh no. Do you want to borrow my mask? Oh no, I have that other mask that I bought. What mask? Remember the metal mask that I bought when I was with you?

I'm just going to put it on. Yeah, that's a good dinner wear. It's just a big old cast iron tiki mask with giant tusks and, oof, all right. With horns and tail coming out of it. Mm-hmm. Yep. giant tusks and, oof, all right. Blue teeth, green horns, and tail. I'm not a fan.

Mm-hmm. Yep. Curious choice, but I understand, probably for the best. There is not much of a mouth hole, so eating is going to be very difficult. Yeah, it's a little bit of a porn slot. Takes a little spoon, just like,

all right, here we go. Try to make it. Getting it. Perfect. Takes a little spoon, just like, All right, here we go. Oh, okay. Okay. Perfect. So you guys talk for a bit. She shares some embarrassing stories of Jester's childhood, asks each of you a little bit about your story,

and we'll say, you know, the better part of the evening, it's an enjoyable respite from the chaos of the day and the chaos of the journey. Your blink dog has dried, as is your weasel. Oh yeah, can I go check on Professor Thaddeus? You can, and as you go ahead and find, there is a coat room, essentially, where the young man who had originally

met you when you got there is inside, and you can see him sitting in the back on a stool, going like this, and he's staring in the far way, and there's a coat rack where Professor Thaddeus is sitting on there just staring at him. As you enter the chamber. Hey. Oh, hey. Is my bird okay?

You can see there are some scratches on his cheek. Yeah, he's fine. Just watching him right there. Uh-huh. You didn't traumatize him, did you? I think not. Hard to feed these. Yeah, I know.

I grab the food that I just took from my plate, and I'm like, Thaddeus, come. Thaddeus? Roll an animal handling check. Fuck me, fucking animals. Why did I do this? I don't know. Oh no. Six.

Fuck my plate. I'm going to have an owl. Like. Dives towards you. And just goes right over your shoulder and is now in the middle of the central tavern. Oh god. The leather cord of his leash is now dangling as it's up in the rafters and. I can't control him, you guys. He has a mind of his own.

Everyone in the chamber is like, the people that are eating, who are like, what the, they're all staring up at this owl that has now found a brief perch up into the roof chamber. Oh, you've all seen an owl before, shut up. I think they're worried about the. They'll be fine. Caleb summons Frumpkin the octopus,

and I just roll his head like a Bond villain staring at Beau. He squeaks like a balloon. I'm going to pull one of the beetles out of my staff and just say, Professor, you want a snack? And I just hold it up. You're just holding the beetle? Yeah.

Make an animal handling check. There goes your finger. 12. 12? Eventually dives down, snatches, and a little prick on the finger from one of the talons, but eventually makes a quick meal and heads back up. Sorry.

What happens if we have to leave and the bird is still here? We'll come with us. You can climb up. Yeah, we'll figure it out. You can climb up to the, I'll figure it out. You can climb up to the ceiling. Susan. What?

Hey, Mama. Yes? Will you watch my puppy? Well, it's me and Beau's puppy, really. Yeah, yeah. Will you watch our puppy while we go out tonight? Of course. Hi.

To be honest, I've been thinking about maybe having a pet, so this would be good training. Oh, really? Well, since you've been gone, you know. How do you feel about owls? I hate parrots. I hate weasels. They're interesting, definitely.

Yeah. Are you good with puppies? Because this one's kind of special. I imagine that it is. How is it special? This sounds like a warning. Um. It sounds like a warning.

Nugget, poof! Lift off your mask. Oh, thank you. Nugget, poof! Lift off your mask. Oh, thank you. Nugget, it's me, poof! It appears in your chest and you catch it, and she's like, oh my. He blinks. That is as tricky as perhaps the daughter that they had. So I'm going to tell Nugget to look at my mama

and say, just blink to her right now, okay, for as long as we tell you to, that's home. Mama, tell him you're home. You're home. No, tell him you are home. You are his home. No, Selim, you are home. You are his home. Oh, I am your home. That's good, that's good, here.

Be careful he pees on things. Immediately she goes. And just pets him over the table. You got rid of a dog, that's great. I didn't get rid of him. Well, I mean, we don't have to have him anymore, so that's good, right? Well, he's still our dog.

All right. Nugget could live here and you could visit him when you come home. Maybe. And the weasel and the owl. No, the weasel's staying with me. I know, I'm such a temptation. I know, I want to eat that weasel so bad!

I'm out. Are we going to go down to the docks? Yeah, is it almost midnight? Yeah, it's getting close, about 11, 1120. Yeah. Let's go. Mm. All right, so. Professor Thaddeus, do you want to come? Make one more animal handling check.

Fuck me, just come to me, you dick. Ooh, that's a natural 19, 22. Whoa. See, he responds when you talk sternly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Eventually, seeing this command, comes to rest onto your wrist. I mean, it's fucking right.

Third time's the charm. Let's go. He likes cursing, I guess. All right. Who are you asking? Is he coming with? He's coming with to the docks, I guess. Nothing more inconspicuous than a big fucking horned owl on your arm.

Oh, are we trying to be inconspicuous? It's fine, you can see the dog. Right, exactly. You can get your tree thoughts to me. Fucking Hermione Granger up in the shit. I take the mask off, but I put my hood down. Okay. So you guys make your way through the streets,

heading towards where? The, you know, the docks. There's the Restless Wharf and there's the Open Quay. We were told maybe one of those? Well, the place where you had heard this information. Did Orly say specific docks? Ah. Which is the Open Quay, right? Was where he wanders at midnight?

We were at the Wayfarer's Cove. Right, which is in the Restless Wharf. So while you didn't get any specifics, you just said near the docks. But you were in the Restless Wharf when you got this information. Yes. All right, so who's helming a lookout?

I'll do that. I'll put up my hood as well. And we've got lamplight on the streets, to varying degrees. There are torch poles set up towards the wharf that are giving a faint bit of light, but other than that, it's not a full moon, but it's mostly full, and there is quite a bit of moonlight

coming down over the dock. You can see it glittering across the water in the center of the harbor. There are a number of ships quietly set out in the vicinity. The star-clustered sky completely envelops the air above you. It's a beautiful view. The closer you get to the docks, you can hear the sound of waves crashing from just out of view. The creaking of wet wood filling the air as the docks shift and the number of boats that are currently moored to the center of the harbor creep from side to side as the water comes in.

Every now and then you see this slow, glowing beam of the lighthouse just pass overhead about once a minute or so. It's a very slow-moving, pulsing rhythm. Now, ships of varying sizes sit across this dock spread, tied to their posts, all seemingly lightless and lifeless in their slumber. There's no one doing any evening work, it looks like, on these ships at this hour.

You see a handful of Zalezo that are patrolling up and down the sides of the dock doing their rounds. No urgency or direction necessarily. So go ahead and make a perception check, if you don't mind, Clay. That's a... 26. 26, Jesus.

Okay then, you... Why is this for all of us? 26, Jesus. Okay then. I'll breed him. You watch out for one of the westernmost docks of the district to see a shady figure darting between patrols, watching as the Zalazzo will pass and then use that moment to dart across the street and wait for the next Zalazzo to pass and then make their way over to the edge of the wharf.

You see them now ducking near a stack of empty shipping crates and they just wait. Every now and then glancing over when Azaleza is not nearby or looking towards one of the darkened ships that is anchored towards one of the dock extensions, not that far from one of the docking cranes that's left still after an evening of offloading from one of the other ships.

What do you see? I mean, it's pretty quiet. Other than that guy hiding over there by the shipping crates is really nothing else happening. Is he blonde? Is he blonde half-elf? It's really dark, I don't know.

Other than that, there's nothing really happening. There's a guy darting. Should I go dart after him? Ooh! Yes. Are we playing darts? Yeah, yeah. Wait, do you want blessing of the trickster? Ah! What does that do?

Gives you a test about stealth checks. Oh, okay, great. Episode 30, something. You do watch as Izelezo, holding one of their portable torches and their sheath sword, glances over in the direction of where that shaded figure is. Steps towards it and holds the torch up and begins a soft call out like, hello?

Shaded figure stands up and approaches, hands open, smiling. Getting a better look, you do see what looks to be finer elven features, a lighter, ashy hair that's short on the sides and flopped in the front, who approaches, talks briefly. You can't really hear what they're saying, it's hushed, but puts something into the hands of Zalazzo.

Zalazzo takes a moment, nods, and then turns around and leaves his post. That's really useful information. The figure goes and then darts back behind the crates once more and keeps looking over towards one single ship that's about 35 or 40 feet from where he's sitting. I wonder what he's waiting for.

Yeah, it looks like someone who's waiting for a handoff, if I've seen him. I wonder how much he paid to bribe the guard. Apparently five gold is a great going rate. That's true, that's what we did. Yeah. Seeing as there's no guard, I'm going to dart over towards where he's hiding,

but not right on him or anything. We crossed away. With advantage. Ooh, that's a one. That's slightly better. Oh, that's real. 17. He was waiting for a toilet break. 17, okay.

He was waiting for a delivery. 17, okay. He was waiting for the delivery. So you make your way over to the side of the docks on the opposite end. And there's a little step up from this edge of the street and a few buildings begin to give away the road that ends and there are bits of it that break off and fall off into short cliffs into the water. There's the docking crane to your left

on a bigger piece of the dock that's out of the way, but it's blocking a lot of the view on this side. The ship that this figure's focused on and the crate sees by is on one side. You get to the other and you're keeping quiet. You don't think you've been noticed. Mm-hmm, okay. Make a perception check.

Perception check. Nine. Nine. Yes. You're waiting. Not much else seems to be going on. Great. Well, I'm ready for anything.

Okay, you just sit there and wait? Yeah. Okay. The rest of you are doing anything, and you're waiting on that? Yeah. Okay, the rest of you doing anything? You're waiting on that? While all that was happening, I'm halfway through, as a ritual spellcasting, Find Familiar so I can change Frumpkin to something else.

Okay. I'll tell you in a minute. Okay, so you begin casting that. Yeah. Caduceus, as this is happening, you watch, because there are a few, there's those torch poles set up and there's one at each dock nexus. The one by that ship, the light flickers out.

Motherfuckers. Well, that's a thing. You guys see that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't see that, and you're not close enough to hear any of this. You see as if a handful of figures seem to have come out of that ship, walked across the gangplank, and put that torchlight out. I think something's happening.

What do the figures look like? Make a perception check for you, if you want to glance, or are you just asking Caduceus? I want to look. That's that 26. Yeah, right. I can to look. That's that 26. Yeah, right. I can't tell. I've got a 14.

Yeah. I can't really tell. She can't make out the details, and even from this distance, you can't make out a bunch, because they are all wearing either full cloaks or half cloaks that end right about just past the elbow. Hoods up. Not uniform, patchwork in color and make, but they're all obscuring their features intentionally. They look like pirates.

Should we go up and grab more bearing gifts and shit? I was just thinking that. I think maybe a little bit of familiarity with some underground might help the situation. Maybe a little bit of familiarity with some underground might help the situation. Yeah, we're bearing gifts and we want to see the captain, see what happens. Okay.

I'll go with you on that. All right. Nott, you watch as the figure that's waiting stands up, out of the spot, looks around, looks that there's no Zalezo currently patrolling at the moment, and begins to now step onto the dock and walk towards the figures in the ship. Oh, I will trail behind.

Okay. Goes and approaches the figures. There's now two that have stepped up to meet, and you can see now there are a few more that are still in the ship, that are just watching. How big is this ship? Is it like a ship? I mean, it's a fair size.

I'd say from tip to end, it's about 50 or so feet. Single sail, but a big sail. Any iconography on the sail? It's currently furled up. But it looks like it's a ship that's designed for speed more than cargo. But it's a decent-sized ship. Is the layout of the dock, is it just the front of the ship near the dock? Is it pulled up? Is it parallel parked?

The dock, as you're walking, continues forward, and then it turns a little bit at an angle, and there are other ships that are docked. There's a smaller fishing ship on one side, there's a rowboat that's set off to the water there. It's facing almost towards you at an angle, and is currently anchored at the edge of where the dock turns to the right,

and there is a gangplank set out between that and the dock where the figures are stepping up, and they're meeting right at where that gangplank is where the torch was snuffed. Hey, Gloria. You've got that fancy armor that helps you float. You think maybe you could get underneath the docks over here or something?

Yeah. I like that. I'll run and I'll just, staying a good distance in, I'll just drop off the docks under the water and start swimming. Seal team. All right. Go ahead and make a...

Shloop. I don't know, how do I want to do this? That's your autobiography title. I know. There you go. I walked into that one. Make an acrobatics check for me, Fjord. No splash. No splash. 10 points.

Five. Oh. Bellafla. The figures all of a sudden all stop and turn as well as the ones talking to them. They all look in the direction. I use Thaumaturgy to make a dolphin sound. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, queen, yes.

Night dolphins. So Thaumaturgy, it's not so much an audio mimicry spell, but you can make certain sounds happen, so I will say roll a performance check. Boy. Come on, come on. Seven. Over here! Over here! It seems to not assuade their fears,

and more just make them more worried and curious as to what's happening. You watch as the two figures there start looking over towards the initial figure you were following and are looking really aggressive towards them. I turn to Caleb and I go, oh my god. The figures' hands are up and are like, and there's this heated conversation going.

The figures in the ship, you can see, are getting things at the ready that you can't see, but it looks like they're very much on guard. The two that were talking to it, one of them grabs the scruff of the figure and holds them there, while the other one, blade drawn, begins to approach the edge of the dock where that noise came from.

I turn to Caleb and I go, there, I threw our engagement ring and our life and I fed it to the rabies dolphins. It's over, okay? It's over. Make a deception check. You're a strange dude. I like that your ring made a ploosh. Make a deception check with disadvantage.

Caleb's on the ground going. Deception with disadvantage. With disadvantage. Okay. 11. As you give this display, you can see that the figure with the sword out that was looking for the edge of the water

where Fjord looks over at you and goes, with a little bit of features you can see, like a chin, looks like a scruffy beard poking out from beneath the hood. The blade there turns back, gives a hand motion towards the ship. I didn't even ask, how far is the water from the fucking dock? Five feet or 15 feet? From the water? Is it a tall dock?

Oh, it's about ten foot. Sweet. I can't even get out of this water if I wanted to. Time up on the cliff if you need to. Also, has ten minutes gone by? No. Okay. Because when you started this, everyone was going into the prize. You're maybe treated as You can put them up on the cliff if you need to. Also, has ten minutes gone by? No. Okay. Because when you started this,

everyone was going into the prize. You're maybe treated to it. Well, I said it was, well, you didn't correct me, but I said while not was foofing around, so some time passed, five, ten didn't, but. Right. You're the DM. While this is all going on,

I'm going to cast Message and send it to Caleb and say, there's something in the water. There's some argument happening. Something's going horribly wrong, Caleb. We should get out of here. You can respond to this message. My mom was right. I never should have gotten involved with you.

I know that I'm so close to the end of this battle and I'm just going to push through. Look, and this is why, every time I try to talk to me, you play with your toys. The figure gets within 15 feet of where you're standing and he says, hey, piss off. Hey, you know what? You piss off, okay?

I've had a rough day, okay? I just wanted to be by myself in the ocean. Closes his fist. Three arrows get loosed from the ship, in your direction. Oh! That's going to be a 14 to hit, and this is a believe. Miss.

That's going to be a 19 to hit. Hits. And another 19. Oh! Hits. Tracy another 19. Ooh! Hits. Tracy. Run away, Tracy. Never. All right, that is seven points of damage.

I'm going to deflect missiles. Go for it. What do I have to run for that? Hang on, sorry, action. It's 1d10 plus your monk level, isn't it? It's reaction damage minus 1d10 plus my monk level. It just happens, right? Yeah, you just roll a d10 plus your monk level.

Right, but my monk level is... Six. Yeah, so I'm good. I'm going to go ahead and spend a ki point to send it back at this guy. Okay. Yeah, this is happening. Love that she's having a fight with her boyfriend

with a giant owl on her shoulder. Yeah. He's my rock. He's the only one who understands me. Okay, I'm attacking. Natural 20. Ooh, okay, so go ahead and roll a d6. I thought I got a d10 with whatever the bolt is.

Back at him. Right, right, the bolt is, well, the arrow is a d6. Plus your dex or whatever. Plus my dex. I believe it's. Double the dice. Rolls real fast on the rolling double the dice. Double the dice.

Yes. It was weapon damage, yeah, plus my dex. Yeah, so it's d6 plus your dex. Okay, so seven. Seven points of damage, so someone back here. But a pretty decent distance. The other one's going to go ahead and, the other one that hits you,

that's eight points of damage. Deflect Missiles. So it's a third ki point, or second ki point you spent. No, it's only a ki point when I send it back. Right, but you've already used one reaction, so you have to spend another ki point to get an additional. Gotcha. I will do that. Do you get key points on short rests?

She does, yes. Yes, I do. It was seven damage, you said? Eight points. Okay, so I take one point of damage. One point of piercing damage. I don't get shit. People tell the truth, and you don't get shit. People tell the truth, and you're a good wallet. I'm going to spend another ki point to send this one back to you.

Okay, go for it. I'm going to do it. 17. Yeah. Oh, Jesus. At the guy who? Eight damage. Eight damage? Is this to the guy who already took an arrow, or to another? Because there are three of them that fired at you, so. To the guy who's closest to me. Okay.

Both of these back this guy. Okay, so the same guy gets hit by both arrows. At this point, the guy who had given the order sees you do this, and his hand comes down, gives a quick shot of his shoulder. Come on, take him out, they've seen too much. Hey, Caleb. Hey, Caleb. Yeah, yeah, yeah?

They don't think I'm a dumb drunk bitch. Didn't work. Where we are, Matt, before you run off for the thing, can you describe, as Caleb shakes his head out of what he was doing, what do I see? I haven't paid attention to any of that. That's what I'm about to show you. It's going to all be in front of me? I love this game. It's as if he knew that this would go horribly wrong. This is going to be bad. The raven and the rook.

Sorry. I'm disappointed in us. For what? That was just the most flounder fucky sneak up ever. Belly flop, shitty dolphin, masterpiece theater. We had bad rolls on important things. Holy fucking, look at this, this is the best map you ever made.

All worth it now, it's all worth it. Everything is worth it now. Oh! There we go. So that is the figure. I feel like it's a misty night. It feels like a misty night, too. Don't you think?

No, I think we're all right. No, I think we're all right. So you guys were over to the, actually, probably a little further back here. Gosh golly darn. Feels like we should have figured this out. I assume Find Familiar has fizzled. How many gifts?

What happened? Yeah. That was the first idea. It was. I also think. Things started moving quickly. Oh man, this is so cool. This is so bad ass. I'll take him, that's what happens. I hope they don't kill Marius.

We can keep him okay. We could grab Marius and try and get the fuck out. It's a good thing we rested, haven't waited until the following night, though. Yeah, right? So good. We would have missed all of them. We are in the water right there. Caduceus, Jester.

Puffy pants. They look like they're hiding. All right, so Nott, you have been hiding off to the other side of the dock here. Ooh, look at me, well positioned. Caduceus, Jester? Maybe were we down over there?

Yeah, hiding next to the building or something. I was going to say, yeah, like... Like crouching down, observing, right? You're keeping out of sight the best you can. Watch this. Yasha, whoever wants to run Yasha, is going to be with you guys as well. Do we have an iPad for that?

We will, because we're going to take a break before we jump into this, because it's nine o'clock. Oh, nice. I'll give you guys a moment to figure your shit out. Shit, son. So cool, Matt. We'll be right back here for this giveaway. While we're gone by Wyrmwood,

we have here, oh, it's cherry wood. Ooh! This is a nice little cherry wood piece here with the eastern sea of the Euphorus Peninsula drawn by our awesome friend Devin Rue. This is the full dice tower and little dice box set. This will be going to one of you lucky winners out there.

So to enter this tonight, where did I put the sheet of paper? There it is. Somewhere in the vicinity. Ha ha ha, I was prepared and then it went away. That's a good action. Somewhere in the vicinity. Ha ha ha, I was prepared and then it went away. That's a good action. Well, if I recall. Code word?

Yeah, my paper completely vanished. What's the code word? The code word is Marid, M-A-R-I-D. Marid. Marid. Marid, M-A-R-I-D. Head over to the Critical Role Twitch chat to enter. Enter only once.

Any more than that, you'll be disqualified. We'll come back with a winner here in just a moment. See you guys in a second. Woo-hoo! Hello, Critters. This is Ashley Johnson, president of the Critical Role Foundation, our 501c3 nonprofit organization

with a mission that might sound familiar. To leave the world better than we found it. We partner with other nonprofits to raise funds supporting causes that mean a lot to us. And we allocate 10% of all donations to an emergency relief fund that allows us to provide immediate assistance in the case of

natural disasters or other unexpected emergencies that require quick action. To learn more about the Critical Role Foundation and to donate, visit criticalrolefoundation.org. Welcome back. So before we jump back in, we have the winner. The winner is Spraying Mantis. Spraying underscore Mantis, congratulations. We'll get your information and get your Wyrmwood victorious gift out to you ASAP. Spraying Mantis would fit in at our table. Yeah. I need you all to roll initiative, please. Roll for initiative!

Should I roll for Yasha, too? Yes, if you don't mind. I will roll. No! What is that? No! I better roll for Laura. You roll for Laura.

I shouldn't. I added my boost. Would you roll for you? Three. All right, so starting at the top, 25 to 20? I rolled a natural 20. Nice. Yasha rolled a natural 20. Nice. Yasha rolled a two.

The classic from across the country. Yep. Which is weird. All right, 25 to 20 is the only one? No, 20. Okay. 20 to 15? 16.

16 here as well. All right. 20 to 15? 16. 16 here as well. All right. Okay. 15 to 10? 12. Jester has 13. This is Sparta.

Caduceus. Caduceus! Yep, we'll see real fast. Three. Oh, that's good. And what did Yasha roll again? Two. Whatever, plus whatever her initiative bonus is,

which I don't know. So it's you, then Yasha? Oh, I was about to say, we don't have, unless because we don't have her iPad. We'll just make her last. It's a plus, let's say plus seven to hit. You know the rules for rage. I do. We'll go with that, and she does an additional

two, three, six, five, you should probably pull up the stuff. That was something that should've been done during the break. Yeah, we said we were going to do that during the break. Well, you did not, so now you don't have Yasha's abilities. That's how it works out. So y'all should be doing some damage if she gets there.

All right, so top of the round, Fjord, in the middle of this chaos now breaking, the arrows being flung, you are in the water and 10 feet below the dock. What are you going to do? All right. I'm going to use my bonus action to use the single charge on Summer's Eve, doesn't use a spell slot,

to Misty Step from my position in the water up to where Marius is. All right. Is that Summer's Eve a douche? Yes, it is. What's the name of the sword? It's definitely for when your vajayjay itches. Yeah, that's what it is.

No, it's Summer's Dance. Summer's Dance. That's the best! Best ever! Sponsor us, Summerzee! Sponsor Summerzee from now on. Tell us about your patron, Fjord. He smells of lavender and vanilla.

Beautiful. Oh my god, amazing. I love it. What is the? 30 feet. I was going to say the Misty Step, is it on a short rest or a long rest? It is every short or long rest.

Gotcha, cool, perfect. And with my action, I will cast Thunder Step. Well, I'll reach out and grab towards Marius and say, come with us, and cast Thunder Step. He has to be willing to come with. All right, make a persuasion check with disadvantage. Oh, really? Yeah, because you literally showed up,

ruined this whole deal he was about to make. Come on, pejorative. No. That's a natural one. He's not willing. Fair enough. Is he the redhead? Yes, he's puffy pants. Does it cancel out the spell,

or does it still happen he just doesn't come with? If it still happens, he just doesn't come with. Well, that didn't work. So I will... Did you talk to him before you Thunderstep out? I did. Just tried and failed. Rolled a natural one, it was great. He didn't want to come.

This is going great. Yeah. This is smart for the fucking course. Yeah, I'm brand, I'm brand. Can I make it over to this dock over here? What's the home? 90 feet. Most likely, yeah, you have to count it out. 45, 50, yeah, easily.

You can make it anywhere on that dock, pretty much. That's 90 nautical feet. Where? Did you roll that? That's 10, 3d10 thunder damage. Three. Five. Eight points of thunder damage, whoa! Thunder damage. Three. Eight points of thunder damage, whoa! Well, it doesn't kill Marius, that's good.

That's good. All right, so, there's this blast, this loud thunderous sound, which may have gotten the attention of a nearby Zlezo or two. Oh boy. Ah. Oh god.

Where's the reset button? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Back to one. This fucking, yeah. Yeah, just load the latest save file. Maybe just reach into the NES and push the game up and down. There's none in view currently, so you don't know. It could be a while until one of them shows up,

but you get the sense that that was a loud noise because it's a thunder step. Oh yeah, you can hear it within 300 feet. Yeah. That ends your turn. That brings us now to the bowmen. The bowmen, who... Right here. Put me out of my misery. No, actually, you show up and you go, but they don't know where you showed up. You just vanished out of sight. So they're all going to focus on the one

they were already told to fire at. So they're going to all aim at Beau. It's going to be, actually, they had a hard time with you and you threw it back, so only one of them's going to fire on you. The other two are going to be, actually, they had a hard time with you and you threw it back, so only one of them's going to fire on you, the other two are going to fire at Caleb. So against Beau, that is? Self-defense to defend Caleb. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 20 to hit.

I think I cast Mage Armor before going down to the sluice, but how much later is it? Is it beyond eight hours? At this point, it's midnight. You guys went there mid-afternoon, so it's been, yeah, it's been past eight hours. So that is four points of damage to you, Beauregard? Zero points of damage to me. All righty. And then two attacks against you, Caleb.

Both are 15? Well, I will cast Shield. All righty. I miss. They both splinter off of you, no issue. Who am I after in the initiative? You are after Beau and Nott, then another character's go, and then your turn.

Okay. They're going to go ahead and, this guy's going to move up to the side here to get a better view of you. This guy's going to shift off to the side. This guy's going and move up to the side here to get a better view of you. This guy's going to move up to the side. This guy's going to move up to the top to get a better view as well. What are we doing?

The one that's moving by is going to be like, quick, quick, and he's shouting down into the door that leads deeper into the ship underneath the ladder right there. That brings us to Beau and Nott's turn. Take it away. You want to try and take out this guy in front of me first with your sneak attack? Or do you lean into him?

This big guy? The big guy that you're under. I can certainly try. I don't want people to see me, but sure. I could try and take him out if you want to try and go for someone else. You do your thing first. You just do your thing first, and I'll see where the chips fall. Also, Matt, which guy is our guy? The red guy. This guy is married.

I shouldn't try anything fancy. You're both being poofy. I think we should get the fuck out. Don't ask me. Beau, it's your turn, what are you doing? I'm going to go up to this guy. Right here? Yeah. All right, so you rush up to him.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. up to this guy. Right here? Yeah. All right, so you rush up to him. Uh-huh. I need, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just going to attack him. Go for it, roll for an attack. Where'd it go? I don't know what to do. 12. 12 misses. You swing and it hits, but it hits his heavy splint armor

and hurts your knuckles a bit and takes it. Up in his face, you can see he's a big, imposing half-orc and currently looks to not feel very threatened by you. So that was your first attack? Gonna try again. We are missing a log rest. We could just get the fuck out of here. Yeah. What am I going to do, though? I'm waiting for everybody else to run. 17.

17 just hits. 17 just hits. Fuck, I think I was actually using the wrong math on that last one, too, but that's okay. Okay. Six damage. Six points of damage. But I'm going to try and Stunning Strike him.

All right. That's a 17, 15 plus two, and a constitution save. So Stunning Strike, no effect, unfortunately. Cool. Let's get the fuck out of here. Supes cool. You still have your bonus action. Yes, I do. I am going to, I can always disengage and run. I'm fast as fuck.

It's been another key point to do patient defense and hold my ground. Okay, you got it. All right. Everyone else please run. Nott? I'm going to look up above me and, hmm. Well, he doesn't see me yet, I think. As far as you know, he doesn't see me yet, I think.

As far as you know, he doesn't see you. Okay, so I'm going to scuttle away from him across to that other box over there. Okay. Like across the dock there. And as I'm running, I'll turn around and fire once at the big guy. Okay.

Still sneak attack as Marisha's engaged, right? So that is a 24 to hit. That definitely hits, go ahead and roll sneak attack damage. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, 10, 13, 16, plus five. 21 points of damage. 21 points of damage. 21 points of damage. You watch as he goes from this arrogant,

watching you flounder in front of him as he takes the blows and keeps grinning, suddenly double over as the bolt is now deeply buried into his abdomen. Yeah, that was a pretty tough hit. And then I will, I'll bonus action, just jump in that box. And then I will, I'll bonus action, just jump in that box. Oh no!

And hide. Oh, so cute. Roll a stealth check. Okay. Assassin's Creed. Ooh. Oh wait, no, that's better than I thought. It's 19. I'm wearing my thing, my hood, do I get to roll again for stealth?

Yeah, you do. Oh, you already get advantage? All right, still 19. Yes, you double advantaged me. What the stupid? 19. Now you know. All right, that ends your guys' go. It is now the enforcers' turn, so.

The enforcer. One enforcer comes out of the center of the ship and looks and sees this going, and the guy up top goes, Quick, burn it all! What? Burn it all? This guy is going to go ahead and jump back down into the ship. Burn it all?

Oh, they're carrying weed! They think you're the customs and they're going to burn it! That enforcer is going to pull out a hand crossbow and is going to go ahead and take a shot at you, since you're off in that way. He has disadvantage on the attack, but you're right now, because you're out of his range. He's going to grab and pull Marius towards the gangplank. He's going to fire at you. That's 15 to hit. Misses. Misses, yeah.

You just with your shield and break your shield off, no issue. That's going to be the end of the enforcer's turn. Jester, you're up. Okay. Am I within 60 feet of this guy? You look like you're, it's close. You're... Okay, I'm going to step forward a little bit. Like how much?

There, there, sure. Okay. Five, 10, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 30, 40, 45. Yeah, he's within 60 feet. Okay, I'm going to cast Hold Person at 3rd-level on both him and him. Ooh! All right.

He rolls, the guy with Marius, rolls a natural 17. The guy next to Beau rolls a natural three. Ooh! He's paralyzed. That's good. Paralyzed. Para, para, para-lust. You are currently concentrating there.

So the big guy with the bolt in his stomach is like and his whole body locks up and you can see his eyes go wild as he glances down at you, unable to move at all. Does that finish your turn? You can keep moving the rest of your movement if you want to. I'm going to back up. All right.

And try to get around that building, if I can. Around here, you mean? No, around the back of it. Okay. 25, 30 is as far as you can get. All right. All right, that ends your go. That brings us to Caleb.

Yeah, okay. So I start moving my hand in an arcane motion and I reach back at that building over to my side there and a crate full of food, a wooden crate, starts to jiggle and rockets to the air at the held pool in front of Beauregard. I'm casting Catapult at third level. FOOD FIRE! I'm in front of Beauregard, I'm casting Catapult. Okay. At third level. Fruuuuutpuuuult! All right. And he automatically fails his dex save because he is paralyzed. That is correct.

5d8. 5d8 fruit damage? Yep, from just lobbing this stack of fruits and heavy wooden boxes into his head. It was a drive-by fruiting. So, couple things, couple things. 30 points of damage. 30 points of damage.

And that's a transmutation spell, so I can shuttle a little bit of arcane energy into my transmuter stone, and I'm going to change its property from darkvision into advantage on concentration checks, and I'm going to back the fuck up towards that house as far as I can go. Wow, wizards.

All right. So as the crates slam in, and the body rocks back for a minute, but it's still holding itself in place, but right now there's splinters of wood sticking out of his armor, his jaw's all messed up, the hood gets blown back, and you can see the grayish hair that's tangled

and sea air matted that has now streaked the blood from the impact and bits of his face is just covered in gore. He's looking pretty hurt. This guy's real beefy, though. Yeah. He's also taken a rough round. This is not going well.

Yeah, but we don't want to fight all of them. All right, so. Let's kill it. Caleb, and it's your turn. It's now the captain's turn. Who is paralyzed. So his really, really cool round that he was going to do that was going to be really awesome

doesn't happen because he's fighting against the spell. He's going to make his save. Seems like we're winning. There's more of them. They're burning marijuana. What are they burning, though? We could have found out if we wouldn't have been stupid. There's five people we can see, one dude in the boat down below.

And they're talking to people down below. He's going to make a wisdom save to see if he can resist the... There's nine of us. It's a 12. It's not safe. He's still held. Nice! All right, that brings us to Caduceus. Oh boy, that's just a lot happening. Blow their flesh, Caduceus, let's go.

Do it. All right, let's... Yeah, this'll be fun. That's all taken care of. I'm going to cast a Guiding Bolt, I guess. Okay. Towards? Towards the guy standing next to Marius. All right, go ahead and make the ranged attack roll. You're casting at first level?

First level. All right, go ahead and make the ranged attack roll. You're casting at first level? First level. All right. Yeah, that's a... Where's the ranged attack on that? I think Bolden thinks it's like 120 feet. I think it's pretty far. Yeah, no, it's very far. So just, yeah, ranged attack. Oh yeah, 18, that's like 23 to hit. Yeah, that'll hit.

25, 25. He's only wearing leather armor. Yeah, that'll hit. 25, 25. He's only wearing leather armor. Well, I have 51 hit points, I'm fine. Oh yeah, so that's, yeah, that's, where is that? That's, yeah. 46, okay. That must be, yeah. Ooh.

So that's 910. 15 points of damage. Nice. Thank you. So the bolt hits him, and you see now this vibrant glow as the impact, the energy forms around his chest, creating this beak, and the next attack against that enforcer right there on the gangplank has advantage.

He's pretty visibly hurt. He's not on his last legs or anything, but he's taking some wear and tear. I'm going to vanish. You can do that? I can do that. What? As a bonus action?

I believe so. I'm double checking. I can do Hidden Step as a bonus action. Go for it. Ooh. I'm going to do... Hidden Steps? Misty, Hidden, Thunder? Ooh. Like the steps. I'm going to... The steps. Misty, hidden thunder. You watch everything. Yeah, and I'm going to move off towards,

I think just off in that direction, if that's okay. Full movement or just? Let's go full movement. There? Yeah. Okay. There you go. You are not visible at the moment. I finish this, Kuz's turn. Yasha's up. Yeah, Yasha's seeing all these arrows fly at Beau.

She would like to rage. Understood. She will rush up next to Beau towards the half-orc captain. Sentinel Beads. 30, yeah, easy enough to do. Beautiful, and she will make, does she get two attacks?

She does, she gets two attacks. Two reckless attacks against the half-orc. Well, she doesn't, well, you can to do. Beautiful. Does she get two attacks? She does. Two reckless attacks against the half-heart. Well, she doesn't. You can. Go for it. She has advantage on him because he's paralyzed. Oh! Then we'll just make him regular so that he doesn't get advantage back. Doesn't everybody get advantage on attacks against our two? So that would suck with the arrows. No, only the person you attack. No reckless, any attacks against you. Any attacks against you.

Yeah. It's been a while since you've been rubberless, any attacks against you. Any attacks against you. Yeah. It's been a while since you've been rekt. Been a while. It's fine. That's a 19. That hits, and that is an auto-crit because he's paralyzed. Ooh. And the second one is a 12.

Come on, babe. 12 does not hit, unfortunately. She rolls, what is it, like 2d6, maybe? All right, so for her as a... Just going to carve him like a Thanksgiving turkey. Yeah, this is going to be bad for him. This is for the... I'm going through here. The Zealot. There we go. So the first hit doesn't equal 1d6 plus half the throw. Okay, so it's 2d6 plus six damage.

15, okay. But the dice are doubled, plus an additional d6. 18 plus six is 24, additional d6. 18 plus six is 24. Additional d6. That's doubled. Is two. Yeah, what did I say? Is it 26?

Yes. So that's 28 plus six for her Barbarian level. Yeah, she just eviscerates me. Oh no, it's just. So, man. So as he's there, frozen in place, Yasha just rushes up and just cleaves right through his chest,

and you watch as he folds into two pieces, both tumbling off into the water, and there's now two halves of the orc floating in the water below. Oh. You okay? Yeah. Oh, Yasha, man.

All right, Fjord, you're up. Another layer of insanity. Just fuck my head even more. You know what, fuck it. I'll use my last spell slot to cast Hypnotic Pattern. And I will make it in the shape of the cat's eye sphere above the ship. A hypnotic pattern?

So that everyone can see it. What is that? Hypnotic patterns, I see. That's brand new. Yeah, that'll get, you can't get everybody in the ship. You'll be missing either the guy at the front or the guy at the back, which one do you want to?

I'll miss the guy at the back. Okay, so the front there. That's a wisdom saving throw? Yes. So to the front. 15 is the save. That is a 15. 13 plus two. The guy at the front resists. The next guy behind him, a natural 16 plus two. He resists. The guy next to Marius fails. And Marius fails. He watches both of them, both Marius and the enforcer standing on the gangplank. Their faces immediately go dull as they stare up at this. What you see is nothing. You

have no visual perspective of what's happening, but something that they both go slack-jawed and stand staring up in the air at this empty space. Yeah, they're incapacitated at the speed of zero. But if they take damage or if someone else uses an action to shake the creature out of their stupor, then they're like, what the hell is that? You just spiked their drinks, basically.

Yeah, I basically Thundercat Hoed the eye up into the. Yeah, kind of. Wow. All right, so that's your action? That's not going away. Yes. Anything's your action? That's not going away. Yes. Anything with your movement? Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma. No, I'll come over here.

All right, so make your way to the edge of that dock right there. Perfect. All right, that ends your turn. It's now the bowman's turn. Bowman? All right, seeing you now casting the spell, making a ruckus on the dock nearby, all three of them turn to face you. This guy's going to go ahead and shift over and get a bit closer to the edge, and

all three of them are going to fire at you. Fjord? Oh no! What if we commandeer the ship? Yes! Natural 20 on the first hit. What if we don't commandeer the ship? Yes! Become pirates? Natural 20 on the first hit. Just linked on the boat. Oh, wait. What if we don't commandeer the ship?

I'm within 30 feet of none of them. I've got to be them, not Fjord, right? Yeah. Okay, never mind. I'm pretty sure. I'll double check. Double check that just in case. The next hit against you is, that's going to be 17 plus four. Yeah, that's a...

17 is my only one. Suffer is a critical hit. Oh. Oh, Suffer is? So you is, that's going to be 17 plus four. Yeah, that's a... 17 is my only one. Suffers a critical hit. Oh. Oh, suffers? So you can remove that, okay. Yeah, gone. So, and then it's a natural 17 plus four, so it's a... Hits. Yeah, so all three hit you.

The crit is not a crit, thanks to Caduceus. Ooh! So that's going to be... six points of piercing damage. Okay. Seven points of piercing damage. Sure. And seven points of piercing damage, seven points of piercing damage, and seven points of piercing damage. They're going to use their movement to back up a bit, back into the ship. This guy's going to duck below in front here. They all duck low, and they're all going to attempt to hide.

Nice. Smart kids. Okay. You watch as they all disappear into the shadows of the ship's deck. You're uncertain where the bowmen are. That brings us to Beau and Nott. Are we going in? I guess. Fighting, just trying to get Marius out, right?

I'm hiding still, so I'm going to pop up and shoot the guy next to Marius. Go for it. That is a lot. 20-something. 24 to hit, again. 24 to hit? yeah, that hits. He's also a... Is it advantage because he's incapacitated? I don't know. Yeah, it's advantage to hit, so you can roll twice.

Same roll. There you go. Is this sneak attack? Because he's not aware that you were there and you were hidden, yes. 20 points of damage. Nice. He immediately breaks out of the stupor, glances over and looks at you, and he's hurt pretty bad.

He's glancing over your direction, looking at the rest of everyone there, seeing how things are shifting, looking into his ship. He looks like he's planning something. What else are you going to do? Bonus action. I'll shoot him again. Go for it. Not as good. 17 to hit.

17 to hit, that still hits. Yeah. Eight more points of damage. Yeah! He fumbles forward over it and falls into the water. Psh. Oh man, we might get lucky. Marius! Marius!

Oh, I shot the wrong guy! Marius is still just standing there in the middle of the gangplank. We're going up, we're going. All right. We can't get Marius out. I'll run towards Marius, but stop around that box. Okay.

Do you have a situation? Well, I was just thinking we could. That's it. All right, Beau? What's his name, what's the guy that Orly sent us to try to get out? So Marius is incapacitated. They don't know that. They don't know your disability.

Beau! Oh, that's right. Okay. Okay, I am going to run towards Marius. All right. Got 45 speed. 30, 35. 40. You're not quite adjacent, you're not quite up to him, but you're like 10 feet away from him.

I have an extra 45 speed. 45 speed? Yes. Oh, I thought it was 40. I got that on my extra monk level when I level up. Oh no! And then you knock him out of the way. She slips on some slick duck when she's trying to do it. It's a rough night out here in Nicodranas. There we go.

Fucking power plants are shutting down. There you go, so you're up on the game plank with him now. Can I grab him and tackle him down behind these barrels? You can either do it. Can I try and drag him back? You can use your action to grapple if you want to. I do that.

Okay, so go ahead and make an athletics check. Fuck me. Come on, come on. Come on, monk. Come on, Em. Aw, you didn't come on. Like, why? Like, why are my rolls so garbage?

He's at incapacity? Do I get advantage because he's incapacity? No, it doesn't matter, you can grab him. I just wanted to see you roll. He's not fighting at all. He's literallyacitated? No, it doesn't matter, you grab him. I just wanted to see you roll. He's not fighting at all. He's literally just standing there going, I just wanted to see you roll! You just grab him.

Fucker. Amazing. Okay, I grab him. Okay. Can I use my bonus action to try and drag him back? Do you have a key point? I do. You'd have to do Step of the wind and then fucking move him back. You have to pull him back at half speed, but yeah.

Step of the wind. Yeah, so I'm going to come up behind him and grapple him and put my staff around his throat, making eye contact with everybody else. We're friends! Yeah. Back up. I'll say that knocks him out of his stupor. Well, you know, you're okay. It's like. Hey, back up. I'll say that knocks him out of his stupor. Well.

You know, you're okay. When you're choking him and forcing to pull him backward. Well, you said grapple. Yeah, you grapple by putting your staff into his throat and pulling him backward. That's different. That's a pretty harsh grapple. Yeah. Beau is.

Pretty harsh woman. Yeah. She's a harsh girl. So you've pulled Marius back. Not a subtle person. Whatever Mama wants, Mama gets. That's my turn. I've got Marius! That finishes Nott's turn, now the enforcer's turn. One enforcer just fell over, keeled over dead. The other one is going to step back out from the inside for a second. He's carrying a heavy

crossbow that he has winched back. Pulls it up and is going to spin. The first person you see is coming out of there. It's probably going to be you, Beau, because you're the one who's grabbing him and pulling him off the gangplank as he steps out and looks and sees you. Do I have three-quarters cover? Hmm? Because I'm using him as a human shield. Let's see, because you have half cover because of the boxes that you've pulled up behind.

Unless you want to use him as a human shield, that's up to you. We're here to save you. Oh god! Block this arrow for me. Everyone has to pull their weight, man. He gets two shots. Yep.

Natural 20 and a 17, which I don't think hits, right? Misses. Yep. That is 20 points piercing damage. Do I get to fuck missiles? You have a reaction still, right? Yes, I do. Okay, 15. Okay, so you take nine points, or 15? Yeah, five plus my monk level plus dex, right?

Is that how much it reduces it by total? Just look through our 2,000 rules here. One second. 1d10, oh, and it's also 1d10. I just rolled a 1d8. Okay, so reroll. 1d10 plus your monk level, plus your dex. See, this is old, but it's...

Or is it my proficiency bonus? No, it's monk level and dexterity, you're right. You totally got it. Go for it. Okay, okay, I'm not a crazy person. So not as good, but 13. 13, all right, so you take seven points of piercing damage. Okay. Footclan.

20 gold monks of the Shaolin, golden monks of the Shaolin temple. That means that. That brings us to Caleb. No, sorry, Jester, you're up first. Thank you. Jester, you're up first. Jester, I'm up first. Help, help. Okay, are you hurting?

No, I'm just, I mean, I'm not. That's not good. There's some damage. I'm okay. I guess. Please, please. I've seen my elders. Thank you.

This is really hard to 60. I've seen my elders. This is really hard to succeed. I just need to get any assistance getting Marius out. I don't have anything that's going to help get him out that I can think of. I can. Yeah, if you keep them away, Yasha and I can make it work. Okay, I'm going to cast, fuck. I'll move forward.

Well, yeah, to be closer to Beau, and I'm going to cast Fuck It, Sanctuary. On Beau? Yeah. All righty. That's cool. That's cool. Yeah. All righty. That's cool. Yeah.

Yeah. Did you resurrect him? Yes. Yeah, Sanctuary on Beau, so anybody that makes an attack against her has to either, whatever, you know, get the hell out of here. Jesus! Sorry, that's a bonus action. Eeyore catch-up.

I know, seriously. You know, anyone who tries to kill a cat. I'm freaking out! I don't know what to do! It doesn't matter anyway. Then I'm going to cast Sacred Flame at, can I see anybody on the boat? Sacred Flame, right now you can I see anybody on the boat? Sacred Flame, right now you can see one guy on the boat.

I guess I'm going to try to hit him. All right, so what's the range on Sacred Flame? 60 feet. 60 feet. He gets a, what save, is it constitution or? A dex. Oh, a dex. That would be 13, that's a failure. Okay. Yeah! Sacred Flame making it through!

Woo! Man, that captain's a failure. Okay. Yeah! Sacred Flame making it through! Woo! Man, that captain got abyssal. Six points of damage, yeah, hold person, that was a good one. That was a good move. It's all good, it's a good move. And then I'm going to use the rest of my movement

to go back to where I was. Well, that's as far as you can go. How was your movement to get up to that point? Cool. All right, that ends your go. Caleb, you're up. Yeah, okay, so factoring in a couple of things. One is that I see my friend Beauregard

getting hammered on by them, which I did not like, and also I heard some voice from the boat yell out, burn it, so out comes the Bat Guano, and the Sulfuran slap, and a beam rockets out, 150 foot range out to about here. and slap and a beam rockets out, 150 foot range out to about here and erupts. Oh, what? Okay. Please be sure to get back on her.

All righty. We're killing everyone on the boat. Who gives a shit? We don't even know who they are! They deserve to die. This is not a moral group by any stretch of the imagination. They're trying to kill my friend.

They're getting better than they used to be, but man. Vox Machina is gone. But the point is to get it to a range where I know that it's not going to affect them on the dock. It's going to hit the boat. Okay, so you're getting the boat in this, too. All right, let's go and do it. Get the people, yeah, got to get the boat.

Yeah, absolutely. All right. What am I, a surgeon? No, roll damage. What am I, a surgeon? And I have a third level spell because I used Arcane Recovery back at the Chateau. Okay, specify that next time, but sure, go for it. I also took a poop while at the Chateau, but I specify that next time, but sure, go for it.

I also took a poop while at the chateau, but I thought I didn't need to say that out loud. That's fine. Okay. There's nobody important in the bow of the chateau. There's so many things that could be going horribly wrong right now. Yeah.

This is such a- Just a bunch of refugees wanting to say passage. Yeah. It's not a very good firewall. Is there any way to see what the name of that ship is? Is it on the side of the ship at all? You have to spend an action to look for it. The name would be towards the back

and it's facing away from you. He would have painted that shit on there, I don't think either. Yeah. Like everywhere, like on every panel. 27. 27, all right. The enforcer failed, so on every panel. 27. 27, all right. The enforcer fails.

He takes full. 27. Oh man. Success. Success and failure. All right, so. I will use my movement to step around the corner of the house and I will begin to count

to 20 slowly in Zemnian to calm my nerves. Okay, so you move behind here. All right, I'm going to roll a saving throw for the ship's sails. Oh boy. All right. Not bad, the sails do not catch fire. Hey!

They're charred a little bit from underneath, but the ship isn't now suddenly a giant burning torchlight beacon in the middle of the fucking harbor. I don't know if Caleb is a firebug or if I am. I know, I respect that. I think it's you. All right. Hey man, if you got a fireball.

So that ends Caleb's go. Captain's dead, Caduceus, you're up. All the human cargo is dead. Yeah. Stop standing. No, no, no, the slaves that were below. That guy came out and said burn all the slaves? No, they said burn it all slaves that were below. That guy came out and said, burn all the slaves? No, they said burn it all.

Burn it all, that's all they said. Yeah, I'm just going to throw a Healing Word at Beau, and I'm going to start getting out of here. So I'm going to cast Healing Word. It's not a lot. No, it's 60 feet. 60 feet, yeah, you're within range. So that's a, aw, that's nice, it's 60 feet. Yeah, you're within range. That's nice. It's eight points.

Eight points. There you go, eight points to Beau. Yeah, I'm going to start booking out. I'm just going to start booking out of here. Where are you going? I'm heading back around the way I assume everyone else is going, yeah, that way. Okay. There's Caduceus, finishing your go.

Yasha's up. Yasha's going to rush up and aid Beau in trying to pull Marius towards the docks. Okay. So if she wants to, she can attempt to grapple and then pull him out of Beau's grip, or we could say she holds her action and then it gets a little weird because it's, Would it help? Movement is what you pull him out of the way grip, or we could say she holds her action and then it gets a little weird because it's movement is what you pull him out of the way.

Would it help make full speed when it comes back to Beau's turn if she's assisting? Can she go and then I assist on my turn? She's like, I'm done. I'll allow it, I'll allow it. Yeah, I guess you're doing a relative grapple. Yes, because he is resisting amongst her grapple as well and it's hard. 15 plus plus her. Yeah, that I don't think, yeah. All right, now it's Marius' turn. He's going to attempt to break

free of, now that he's full of mind and he's freaking out, like, what's he going to do? He's going to run right to us now. Make an acrobatics check against your athletics. Ball of Fire. Technically, since you're both grappling, either you or Yasha can make the check, and it's with advantage, I'll say, because you're both holding.

God, and it's an athletics check? Right. What's her athletics? I don't know, but I know mine. It would be a plus six, probably. Since mine's also a plus six. All right, so go for it. Get it, girl. Get it, get it, get it, get it. He almost so go for it. Get a girl, get a girl. Get a girl. Get a girl.

He almost rolled really high. Oh, those are two bad dice rolls. 11 total. He does still manage to break free! Yay! Something's going well for Matt. He's going to go ahead and run. You fucking piece of shit.

Seriously? Why would you do that? They had a dagger to your throat, you dick. The ship's on fire. The ship's not on fire, but he has no reason to trust any of you and was meeting with these people. So if he's going to choose between the two, he's going to go ahead and step into the ship there.

He's just like, gets down low and is hiding. Though you know right where he is. That brings us to the top of the round. Fjord, your turn. No problem, we got this. Fjord pulls out the big guns, master plan, here it is. Yeah, yeah, I'm going to run over here. It's so hard, so hard to get him that far.

28, 29, 30. If I stand out here, it'll unleash two Eldritch Blasts. Eldritch Blasts. That guy? Okay. You can look and see now, he is not the enforcer that went below deck previously. He's dressed similarly, but now that you get a better look at this view in the light, he's somebody else.

There is still one person down in the ship. Awesome, great. That's a 20. That hits. And 11. That hits. Good enough damage. Oh, nice, great. That's a 20. That hits. And 11. That hits. Good amount of damage. Oh, nice, okay. Yeah, he has another armor, he's not, he's 11, it's pretty easy to hit. 11 points of damage on the first one,

and 10 points of damage on the second, so 22 total. That'll do it. All right, so he just, both blasts take him down. The attrition is not working well in his favor. Why don't we say that? Because I know. Damn it. What, that we come bearing gifts?

Gentlemanship? Yeah, I know. Caduceus. It feels like we're really in battle now. Caduceus, you do hear a ways away, not here yet, but you do hear some voices and footfalls, armored footfalls. You get the sense that Zalezo are on their way. Guys, we're going to have problems soon. We should probably get out of here. He will say on his turn when he gets here.

Oh, that's right, I'm not there yet. The bowmen now, who have been hidden below the deck and have endured the fireball, two of them are going to go ahead and, from the positions, stand up and they're going to take shots at you. Yeah. They have advantage on both because they were hidden from you. First hit is, that is a 19 to hit.

Hits. Second one is caught with advantage. That is a 19 to hit. Second one is a 20 to hit. It's punishment for this horrible fucking game. And they have sneak attacks that were hidden from you. This is the hospital. 29 points of piercing damage from those two hits. Are you still up? Oh yeah.

The third goes and unfurls the sail. Unfurls the sail! Goes ahead and pulls the rope and it begins to unroll. A little bit of wind is blowing, opens up a bit. Do we see the sail? Does it have any markings on it? No, it is fairly plain. But you get the sense that they're now looking for a way to get out of here. Ships aren't the fastest when it comes to exits, but they're trying. All right, that brings us to Beau and Nott. Oh boy.

Let them go. What the fuck are we going to do? Run and jump on the goddamn boat? I was about to do that. Yeah, of course. Literally about to do that. At the end of their turn, you can. These guys are going to go ahead and move back as well and attempt to hide again. Fuck yeah. All right, sure, go for it.

Why do you not know how many people are on that boat? Oh my god. They're not very good at hiding, though. They rolled really bad, all three of them at once. It was like a one, a three, and a four. It's a shame they never roll that way when they're attacking. That's funny.

So yeah, so you see them duck down, but they're all pulling out their arrow and knocking it into the bow, and you can see finally where they're hidden. What's the plan, Beau and Nott? Bone it. Do what you were going to do, do it. Beau, do what you were going to do.

Do it, do it. You go first. Are you going to go for the sail? Go for the sail, potentially. Sure. Thought about that. If you could start it, I could maybe rip it. I don't know.

I don't know, I'm spitballing here. I don't know what to do. Make your choices, guys. Who's the guy in black over there? The enforcer who came up? No, the enforcer's dead. Fjord just blew him up on the side. There's now only three bowmen on the deck, and they're all hurt really badly from the fireball explosion, and they all think they're hidden, but they're not. Go get out of that fuck-up butt, man. Go for it. I will, I'll just, shit, I don't want to get,

I won't use my sneak attack. I will bonus action hide, and then from my hidden position, I will shoot. Move around the side. All right, against which one? The guy in black over there, yeah. All right, go for it, roll for attack, with advantage, because he does not see you. Oh, nice.

That's a 23 or something like that? Yeah, that hits, so go ahead and roll damage. Yeah. Sneak attack. Hey, gee gee gee gee. Hey, gee gee gee gee. Hey, coo coo coo coo coo coo. Ooh, that was a good roll.

Oh, that's mean. 23 points of damage. The impact hits him and he falls back and hits the edge of the ship and then tumbles over and into the water behind. You hear no noise. I will use any movement to emerge from my hidden position and move up a bit to behind those barrels, maybe.

There you go. So I have a little cover. Okay. Okay. I'm going to run up and go after these two, I guess. Okay. What's my speed? Fuck me, what am I doing? 530. You rush running across the gangplank.

As soon as you come to the edge, you look down and there's one of the guys who's about to turn with his bow and goes and sees you. I just roundhouse him to the face. Go for it, roll for an attack. Two! Motherfucker! Ten!

Ten misses. You go and kick, woof, and the water on the slick deck makes you slip, just let you catch yourself and don't tumble off the side. You got to wear boat shoes. I haven't rolled above five all night. Okay, okay. She's back.

24. That hits. No, no, no, 23, 23. So you go for one roundhouse, okay, okay. She's back. 24. That hits. No, no, no, 23, 23. So you go for one roundhouse, slip, using the momentum, you spin with a lower circle kick, like a sweep kick, which is about head level with him. Eight damage. Eight points of damage, that'll do it.

Putts to the head. Really? Yeah, the bowmen aren't very, well, a lot of hit points. You've been burned badly. So he just and then falls. I'm badly he just falls unconscious onto the deck of the ship. Do I have enough? Can I get the other guy? You do have enough movement. You have 15 feet more, so you leap down onto his crumpled unconscious body. His other friend is like, and you're going to pull back to try and take a shot while he's backing up towards the back horse of the ship.

And then you go melee range, you can't do it. And then 19. That'll hit, go to a little damage. Big money. Okay, okay, nine! Nine points of damage, that'll do it. Die, die! And so he, you just, when he pulls

unconscious onto the ground. Once, and I turn to Marius and I say, gentlemen sent us? Gentlemen, gentlemen, you a gentleman? He's like, make a persuasion check. Really? Yeah! We need to get on the boat and get out of here. You just killed or beat unconscious

the guys he was coming to meet. We just flipped this. We're going to jack this fucking boat and get out of here. Seven. Seven. He right now is just looking panicked and the words aren't coming through. He thinks maybe you're calling him a gentleman.

He's like, and he's just backing away from you. Ladies and gentlemen. All right, that ends Beau and Nott's turn. Life is disappointing. You do hear what sounds like some movement down. The door is partially open to the cabin below. There is light from the inside,

like some sort of lantern light, and you just hear things being moved around. Can I stand on top of the door? Do I have enough movement to do that? You have five more feet to get to the door and look beneath, but you don't see anything yet. I just want to tamp it down. I'm going to stand my full weight on top of it. Well, the door is look beneath, but you don't see anything yet. I just want to tamp it down. I'm just staying my full weight on top of it.

Burning it. Well, the door is on the side, so you have to put your weight against it, yeah. Okay. Okay? So you're up against the door. That brings us to Jester. Are we trying to get back on the boat now? Yes. Maybe. Okay, I guess I'm going to fucking like an asshole run towards the boat. God, what? This is so dumb. Yep, do it.

I'm going to run towards the boat, but I'm going to, as far as I can. Where are you? 10, 15, 20. We're going to have to fucking wait ten minutes for you. You want to make an action to dash if you want to get there and do anything else. I'll hurt to you. I'm fine. Okay.

You got me, too. I'm still spelled out. Okay, I'll double dash to get to the fucking boat. You, you, you, you, you, you, you. Jump, Chester, jump! You're making your way across the gangplank. Oh god. You're just about making it to the ship and that's the end of your movement there.

Caduceus, you're up. No, no, Caleb is up. Sorry, Caleb is up. Yeah, okay, I see which way the wind is blowing. I mutter a few arcane words and I cast this spell, Expeditious Retreat, which is a transmutation spell, so I will also send a little bit of arcane energy to the transmutation stone and give myself extra speed as well. You can do that. So I can use my action, my movement, and my bonus action to move full movement at 40. So Vex is back.

Vex is back. I am now on the boat. Because that is, so transmutation spell. Transmutation spell gets my movement up to 40, right? Yeah. Action. Movement plus now expeditious retreat is a bonus action. Correct, so you can move 80 feet. 40 plus 40 plus 40.

It's a bonus action to cast the spell. Okay. When you cast the spell and then it's a bonus action. Oh wow, so it's a dash action as the spell when it's cast as well, So yeah, that's 120 feet. Yeah. So a red blur goes. I'm standing next to Beauregard on the boat. Flash!

He'll save every one of us! He went so fast he dropped the bomb. He did. I'm on a roll. You do, actually. Jester tumbles forward into the boat from the sheer force of Caleb. He's flashing into the space. Are we stealing the boat? No, we're all here.

Do we? Does anybody know how to fucking drive a boat? No one on the boat does. All right, that finishes Caleb's turn. The guy who's definitely not here. Oh my god, there's no words that are going to come. Oh no! We swear we're not here. Oh my god, there's a Leza, they're going to come. Oh no!

We swear we're not pirates. Way to build that tension. Begin to appear, and now there's a Leza that are coming around the corner. Are coming forward with torches. There are more a little further down the way, and they're shouting out, What's going on?

What is? Looking around, they can see you, Fjord. They can see Yasha up on the side, and they can see people on the ship across the way. No. But that's the turn. They just acknowledge and they're telling you to halt and they're asking for your attention.

Excellent. That's going to turn to Caduceus' turn. They do not see you. The sound you heard, you couldn't quite make out the direction it's coming from, but you can now hear it coming from around the edge of the street. I'm going to ponder.

I'm going to make the sound of a bunch of people panicking and saying, hide everything, hide everything. With? With Thaumaturgy? It's stretching the g cantrip a bit. Oh, no, I thought you can create instantaneous sound that originates from a point of your choice within range. It's like a sound, like a bird caw.

You can't create the sound of a whole crowd screaming. Okay, that's fair, that's fair. There's some limitations to the cantrip. You can do Ominous Whispers. It's listed. It is listed. I'm going to make one of the doors on that boat over there slam shut really loudly. I'm going to run and hide behind the map on the other. I'm going off the map around

there. You're going the other way? I can't. It's fine. I'm going to just be going all the way? I can't. Everybody else? It's fine. We got to ride. I'm going to just be going all the way up. We'll get you upstream. We'll get you upstream.

He's going to go hang with the ruby. Catch you later. Y'all, we can't get the boat out of here fast enough before we can catch the boat. Go ahead. We've got, mm-hmm. Actually, no, this will be on their end. I'll just be 30 feet.

I'm not running, I'm walking. He's an expert sailor. It does catch their attention, kind of, and they look over, and the few that hadn't seen Fjord now look over and see Fjord on the dock as well. So there you go. They are aware of those that are currently visible on the deck of the ship and Fjord and Yasha over there.

Great. That ends Yasha's turn. What's Yasha going to do? Yasha's going to run her ass onto the boat. All right. Double dash if she needs to. She doesn't need to. With her speed, she gets under the ship there.

And she will assume the dodge, whatever, in case they throw fire or something. Okay. That brings us to the top of the round. Fjord, your go. I'm going to Arnold Schwarzenegger from True Lies run and jump off the dock and dive into the water, heading straight towards the boat in a straight line

because my speed is the same on land or in the water. And I will double dash to the boat. The abyss. For you. Oh man, I'll have one more. All right. That's pretty much where I'll do it. I'll be like, let's get the fuck out of here, shove off!

So as you do that, the guards are going, Hey, hey, halt! They're drawing and loading crossbows. You are not stopping, you are not hailing, you are not listening to anything they're saying. They assume you are stealing a ship, which you are. Which we are. I could be the only survivor of this. This'll be funny.

The sails are unfurled. Sail! It's still anchored. Oh god. You notice as you get to the dock. Are we tied up, too, with the whole smash? Yeah, they were just starting to get the process going of getting the ship done, and there was still somebody

down inside rummaging through the interior. She's off. Yeah. You as a sailor, you get there and you assess the situation, you're like, this is going to take a little bit to get the boat out of here. No problem. I mean, through natural means.

I don't know what you have at your disposal, but. I just set the boat on fire and kill us all. Yeah. Bury our shame. All right, so you've taken your dodge action. All moment are gone. That brings us to Beau and Nott. I run over and I untie the boat from the thing. I undo the rope.

Okay, are you bringing the, like the, it's the- Are we hitched to the dock with rope? We're probably tied up. And anchor? Yeah, you tie them to the side and then there's an anchor off the side. Right, with like a cleat or whatever they're called? Yeah. Yeah, I work on that because I'm assuming

the anchor is heavy. Okay, yeah, so you manage to pull it up. Go ahead and make a strength check to see if you can get it all the way up. The anchor? Yeah. Okay, that, so you manage to pull it up, go ahead and make a strength check to see if you can get it all the way up. The anchor? Yeah. Okay, that's opposite from what I said, but I'll do it. Oh, sorry, I misunderstood. Wait. So yeah,

so you just go ahead and untie. I'm trying to undo, do I also have time to get the anchor up? Not both, it's an action to untie and get it off the dock. I'll focus on untying and getting it off, and I do the thing that you do where you push on the side of the dock, and I try and get us like.

Okay, so you get over and you shove off a bit. There's still a good distance, the gangplank is there, so it's not right up against the dock per se, so there's not much you can push off of, but you do manage to get it untied. I get it untied, I get the boat untied. Boat's untied. All right.

This is great, this is D&D, motherfucker. So we can't launch. We got five or six guards coming at us. It'll be here. Vox Machina is dead, long live Vox Machina. Yeah, they thought Vox Machina were assholes. Yeah. Oh man, shit. Well, there were a few times that Vox Machina was in this territory.

Sure, but this is our moment. Wow. I mean, I got to get on that boat, right? So. Save yourself. Are there any more moorings? Did she get off all the ropes? She managed to pull, to untie it from the dock itself.

But the gangplank is holding us on? No, the gangplank is just still resting. It's just resting. So if we get moving, it'll just fall. Probably. Okay. I'll dash across the gangplank to get on the boat. All right. And, Jesus, how do we get rid of these guys? I will, let's see, how far away are we? 10, 20, 30. I don't know, I'll cast Silent Image.

Okay. Okay, okay. And I'll make an image of that captain guy. And I'm just going to make him at the end of the dock or something and just doing this, trying to Waving them down? Okay. Just trying to hail them down. Not saying anything. Just doing this. All righty. You got it. So that ends your turn, Nott? Bonus action time!

There you go. Right there at the edge of the dock. Great. All right. That brings us to Jester. Okay, I'm going to crouch. The guards, they're arming crossbows, they're running towards the dock. One of them has his hands up, hailing, like, hey, hey, and is just trying to get your attention.

What are you doing? I'm going to crouch down, and I'm going to cast Invoke Duplicity. Okay. Where do you want? Next to me, where I just crouched down from. Okay. But I'm going to have her pop up

and run across the gangplank. Okay. Very obviously, run over and then look like she's running over and hiding. Okay. I'm going to stay totally as hidden as I can on the boat, crouched down so nobody can see me. Good to know.

Hey Matt, that white ring is just leftovers, right? No, no, no. That's the illusion. The illusory white ring is just leftovers, right? No, no, no. That's the illusion. The illusory captain that I just made appear at the end of the dock. All right. My turn? Yes. I give the glove of blasting a good tug.

Oh no! And I send three arcs of fire up into the air, and they just sort of spiral around each other and crash down onto the dock about five to 10 feet behind that illusion and blast into the dock. Yes. That's good. Okay, go ahead and roll attack for the AC of wood,

which is terribly high. The AC of wood. It is, it has an AC. So that's a 24. That hits. Okay. Feels like something in a- Seconds a natural one. Oh.

Hits the water. And the other one is way high, a natural 17. Okay, so two hit, go ahead and roll damage. Low rolls. 12 damage. 12 damage. 12 damage, all right. The dock splinters and bits of char and burning go flying, but it's still standing. It wasn't enough to destroy the entire dock. Okay, I will use my movement to inside the boat.

Okay. You vanish inside the interior of the cabin, pushing past Beau, who's been holding the door shut. As soon as you come down inside, there's a lantern and there's one of the enforcers, who you can see is burning papers. Who turns around and sees you? Can I use a cantrip? You have a bonus action cantrip? No, I don't. Never mind. Both just looking at each other. Getting the hang of it. Just looking at each other.

Getting the hang of it, good, good, good. All right. Done. That finishes your turn. That comes to the guards. The guards, the one who was putting his hands up and was shouting, hey, to hail you, and is asking what's going on, has no choice but to assume that you're destroying the dock

and stealing a ship now. Because you are. He's going to send Polak his heavy crossbow and load it. They're going to move up to the side here. Remember how, Jester, you couldn't come back to this town? Yeah. Well, now we all can. You're never going to see your mom again. Sorry.

The weird butterfly effect of D&D actions. This was just fucked from the first. She's going to have a conversation with them. All right, so the guards are going to go ahead and they're all going to fire. I'm crouched down. I'm hiding as well. Yeah, so it's going to be two against you, Fjord,

two against Yasha, and one against Marius. Oh no. Against Fjord, that is a 15 and a 17. 17 will hit, 15 misses. All righty. You take six points of piercing damage. Okay. Both against Jester.

Terrible rolls. That is a 12 and a 10, so they both just going past. Those are for against Yasha. Yeah, because I'm crouched. They could have seen you, but Yasha was the bigger thing, but still misses Yasha. The last one against Marius misses, surprisingly, with a natural seven. He's just looking at all this happening. He looks freaked out. That's going to end the guard's turn.

Caduceus, as you are. I'm going to cast Disguise Self. Okay. I'm going to look like a, I seem to recall, I'm just going to make a composite of just the most piratey, I've decided everyone who's on a boat is a pirate, so I'm going to make the most piratey, drunken, kind of old man that I possibly can. So I'm just going to give a boat is a pirate, so I'm going to make the most piratey, drunken, old man that I possibly can.

So I'm just going to give myself a big white beard, crazy hair, very unthreatening buggy eyes. I'm going to continue to circle around the... 30. That was the last time we ever saw you. Fuck those idiots. I'm figuring I'm going to have to find you guys at some point, but yeah. This is the only way I know how to get to the water.

That was interesting, that was really great. Finds his own adventure. I don't have a better way around. Unless there's a window, unless there's an open passage on the back of one of those houses. There is. It's a closed window, but you can try and break it. Oh, yeah, no, that's too much. So you're over on that side.

It's your turn. Why not? Just go all in. Yasha. That's the best I got right now. Do we help one up the anchor or are we moving it? I only unfurled, so if Yasha can yank up that anchor, that'd be dope. All right, so Yasha goes over, pulls aside, pulls it up, gets it in the inside.

All righty. And now we're ready to go. You're now currently not tethered to. And with her movement, she'll stand in front of Marius like a human shield. Okay. How many arrows that might be coming. All right.

So she's trying her best to protect Marius. Just got to wait for the wind. Where's Caleb? I was going to say, yeah, the time you really missed the arrow shard. All right, so now it's Marius' turn. What Marius is going to do, he can't do now. Well, he might try. He's going to jump in the water. Please don't be dumbass, Marius. No, no, hold on. Marius moves past Yasha.

Like an attack of bitch-lapping. Gets up to the top of the edge of the ship. Let me roll from C of C. That's actually pretty good. Okay. He glances about the scenario, takes in his chances in what's happening, and stands up and just goes, Hold! Hold, please! This is a big misunderstanding! Let's talk this out! To us or to the guard, everybody? Okay.

For the sake of this, I'm going to have one of you guys roll for him. Who wants to roll his I will roll. Persuasion check with disadvantage? Terrible, both were threes. No. Why didn't you roll?

Because it would make it more interesting. Okay, yeah, that's not having any effect on them. Yeah, they're beyond convincing now, it looks like. He just made himself a giant target. Wait! He did. But you know, that finishes the round. Fjord, you're beyond convincing now, it looks like. He just made himself a giant target. Wait! He did. But you know, that finishes the round. Fjord, you're up. I go up and I kick Marius in the water and no.

I want to get away. Can I double dash down into the below decks where Caleb is? Sure. I'll do that. Okay, you make your way down and you join up the side of Caleb and you can see now the enforcer is there throwing the paper that's currently burning onto the table and he's pulling a weapon out. Do I have an action or did I double dash get down?

You said double dash. I'm taking you there to get there. I will use my bonus action to cast Hexblade's Curse on that enforcer with the hope that he will soon be dead. All right. As he sees you and he's pulling the blade, you rush into the frame and what heavy shadows still lie in the bottom here with a little bit of lantern and firelight that slide into the space, the shadows get darker around them and you can see everyone's breath is visible suddenly in this under chamber as the curse takes its hold on them.

That goes to Beau and Nott. Okay, I go over to the rope of the sail and I pull it tight to the jib. I don't know, I do something and I go, Fjord! Beau has never been on a ship. Fjord, how do I sail? The one sailor is below deck right now. Fjord!

I still try real hard. Oh man. I do what I think. Tie that there. Tie that, okay, okay. Make an intelligence check. Okay. Do the winch.

Do the, what's the jib? Do I jib or do I winch? Wait, why am I rolling, which one? Pick one. Pick one. I'm going to do jade, lucky jade. That's an intelligence modifier. Okay, okay, that was good. 19 total.

Okay, you look at it. I think I read the story. Well, you've been watching boats come into Okay, you look at it. I think I read the story. You've been watching boats come into harbor, and you've read things about it, but mostly just from your observational skills, which is one of your focuses and strengths, Beauregard. You're like, okay, I think I've seen people

making ships go. You grab the ropes, you pull it, and you yank past, and you watch as the sail picks up the wind and stiffens. We've caught the wind! I've heard sailors say that. So we're saying Beau, for those purposes, up on the top there holding the rope

and you're like, okay, there's a sail. There's a rudder, right? Not rudder, the boat! I hate water! Nott, what are you doing? Is anything constraining our movement? Is the gangplank in our way? Or are we unfettered at this point?

As far as you know, the gangplank is resting on there. You don't know if it's connected at all. Are we starting to drift a little? You're starting to drift a little bit. The wind has picked up a little bit. Then I will run up and tackle Marius to the ground. All right.

And wrestle him down. Get away, you fucking cunt! Get down, we're trying to talk to you! Make an athletics check to grapple. Ooh, wow. Athletics. Oh, that's just a straight 18. Straight 18.

Yeah, like a wet paper bag, he goes over. They both slam onto the deck below. You have him grappled, and you're holding him down. You don't weigh a lot, but you're leveraging and pulling the weight in a way where his knees are buckled and he can't actually get any ground to hold himself up. Okay. You got him.

That's all I got. All right, the enforcer who's below, who's the curse, is going to swing forward two attacks with his blade. This is going to be me against you, Fjord, because you're the one who came in and cursed him. That's going to be a 15 to hit. It misses. Shield off the one side.

Natural 19. That hits. This is your favored terrain and stuff. It's a boat. No, this is a disaster. This is all of our... favored terrain and stuff. It's a boat. No, this is a disaster. This is all of our... That is 10 points of slashing damage.

Oh my god, no, I'll use my relentless and fucking red. We're going to lose the sailor. Please don't die! I'm up to one hit point. So you just manage to hold on by a thread, your consciousness waning, your eyes focus angrily towards the target of your Hexblade's Curse. I'm disappointed I came back up to what I had planned.

All right. That brings us. I don't even know that's happening. No. No. All right. That brings us to Jester's turn. Great. I'm going to use my duplicate to run forward. We're saving the world, Marisha, we're saving the world. And cast, I'm going to use my Pearl of Power to cast my last remaining third-level spell.

I'm going to cast Charm Person on the three of the guards that I can see. Okay. The ones up front? Yeah, sure. The one up here is the leader, the one that was kind of. Okay, yeah, that's good. He fails with a natural three.

Ooh! Two natural threes in a row. Fucking lucky. And the third one on the far end is a natural six. Okay. You are currently, well, no, it's not concentration for charm person. Those three are charmed. Yes! For an hour. They're in combat though, aren't they?

We've killed everybody, we're charming people, we're on a boat. They are technically in combat with you. Is Frumpkin an octopus, and is it lying back on the dock somewhere? It is charmed by you until the spell ends, or until your companions do anything harmful to it. When the spell ends, it doesn't say anything about it not being in combat with you. Makes a wisdom saving throw and does so with advantage if you or your companions are fighting it. Oh, okay. It doesn't say that on the thingy. Oh, we haven't technically attacked?

Well, no. Yeah, there's been enough aggressive action that they're considered fighting it. So they've all failed their save, I'm just going to do one more roll for all of them. So the leader, that's caught. That's a natural 12 plus two, 14. What's your DC? 15.

15. That's a natural 10. And a 14. What's your DC? 15. 15. That's a natural 10. And a natural 11, they all fail again! So yeah, they're all still Charmed. Well done. What are the odds? That's kind of crazy, actually. All right, so we'll say the red here is the Charmed person. I can feel Travis's dad disappointment radiating.

In us? It's hot. So the three of them drop their weapons for a second and are looking confused. Ones behind are still loading and getting ready. Okay. I guess I'm going to stay hidden on my end and try to make my way down. I can't do anything below, by the way, but okay, whatever, yeah.

Yeah, I guess I'm going to try to go, no, because I'm going to keep visual on duplicate Jester. I'm just going to stay hidden on the top. Okay, that ends your turn, Jester. Caleb. I rub a bit of honey across my lip and say, my friend, I suggest you throw down your weapons and lie under that desk just for your safety, and I cast Suggestion. Okay. It's his natural seven, it's a failure. So he's, after slashing into Fjord

and turning towards you and seeing about to fall, he throws his weapon down and crawls under the table angrily like, I'm going to get you under this table! Then he gets there and looks very confused. I would like to use my movement to zip up to the top and look around. Let's see here. We'll say that's what his next action would be, since typically it's out of turn. You mean climbing under the desk? Yeah. So it's happening simultaneously.

He looks old. Use my movement to zip up and look around, and my bonus action to zip back down to the boat. All right. You look up and you see the scenario. You see the guards are still standing there at the edge. The ship is moving. It's slowly pulling away. Don't hit those guys in the front. All righty. That brings us to the guard's turn. The two in the back are going to go ahead and fire. That's going to be one at Beau and one at Yasha. Against Beau, that is a 17 to hit. Nice. Against Beau, that is a 17 to hit. Miss.

And then against Yasha, that is a 16 to hit. I believe that does hit. She doesn't have a huge armor class, I recall. She does take only five points of piercing damage. Yep. Is that already halved? Well, she hasn't attacked anything. You're right, no, that one fell, yeah. Did she take damage last turn? No, she was attacked last turn, so she't attacked anything. You're right, no, that one fell, yeah. Did she take damage last turn? No, she was attacked last turn, so she's still raging. Oh, she did.

No, but there was a few rounds there where she didn't hit anything, so the rage fell. The guy that targeted Beau has to make a wisdom saving throw. Oh, that's true. And he fails. He goes to fire and he has to choose another target. No, he just fails on a fail. No, he can choose another target. No, he just fails on a fail. No, he can choose another target. Oh, well shit, okay, sorry.

Sorry, the first level spell. Instead he's going to fire that at Yasha as well. Okay, that is a failure. That is a natural seven, so shh, no damage outside of that, except for the damage that she took there. At that point, the leader goes like, Wait, hold, hold, what are you doing, what are you doing? Stand back.

The guy's like, what are you talking about? It's like, hold on, we have to figure this out. Something is strange about this. Hold up. He starts shouting to hail in your direction, and the other guards are putting their weapons away and about to walk over. The two in the back are like, Yes!

What did you do? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. Yeah, they are not sure what's happening. They are not perceptive enough to have seen that it was a spell effect that has changed them. They're confused by it. We'll see if they figure it out soon. With that, these guys are going to go ahead to begin to walk, make their way towards the broken docks. Possibly burning. They see the illusory guy there and look confused.

It just looks like me, though. No, there's another guy. There's a guy just waiting to him. That's like, That's all he's doing, repeatedly. He's like one of those mannequins holding the signs out of the street. You're like, Yeah, he's a wacky waving. Wacky waver.

Half-orc. Yeah. He's got that cardboard arrow. Perfect. Spinning it, spinning it. These guards are going to chase up, confusingly going, sir, sir, sir! They're not entirely certain what's going on.

They're really confused by the scenario. All right, that's going to go to Caduceus. I'm going to NPC my ass right across the street. 25, 30. I'm going to see if I can take my action and keep going. All right. Quietly. Oh no, I'm not going to, I'm going to go behind those, like I'm getting in the water, no, I'm like.

Oh, this way? Yeah, getting in the water. Okay. In the water? I've been, yeah. 30. Oh no, and I'm going to gently get, yeah, I'm sitting in. It's a 10-foot drop. Oh, is it a 10-foot drop? Yeah. Can you lower yourself? You're pretty tall.

Can I climb down instead of jumping? Sure, athletics check. Is he kaiju sized? I'm very tiny looking right now. Come on. Oh my god, that was almost terrible. Nine. Nine?

Mm-hmm. You slip and fall a little bit. You get down about five feet and you make a splash sound. But there's a lot happening. The dogs are on their cry. Yeah, they don't notice, they're focused. I'm going to slowly be making my way

underneath everything. Quietly and with. Five, 10, 15, 20. So you're slowly wading through the water. Yeah. Okay. That ends your go. Yasha's turn. Yasha's going to turn and bear hug Marius. I'm already on him.

Awesome. She's going to assume the dodge. Is there anything else to do, for sure? Can she help try to get the ship to move more? The boat moving? Does she know boats? Does Yasha know boats? Yasha, as far as you know, does not know boats.

She's never mentioned anything about it. And Yasha looks like she doesn't know what she's doing. She's not giving orders or rushing to take a post. I mean, I suppose she could run over to the gangplank and she could try and pull it and then shove it against the dock and push off. Okay. So Yasha will go ahead and push on the gangplank.

Make a strength check for Yasha. Shoving off. 26. Oh! She shoves and the whole boat shifts suddenly. The gangplank plunges down into the water and is floating there on the top. The ship gets shoved off about 10 feet that direction.

Who could have predicted this? All right. Marius is just standing there, held by a goblin, going, Stay down! Stay down! All right, all right. Just stays quiet there, doesn't do anything for it. I'll run back up to the top of the ship where I should be useful. All right.

You don't want to run downstairs? I have 15 feet of movement to get up there. And then run back up. Do I have an action? You have 15 more feet of movement, and you have an action. I'll climb up onto where they're running. Oh, you want this seafaring knowledge?

What did you give me? Okay. So you get up, you man it. Start turning the bow of the ship out towards the sea. It starts arcing and making its way in that direction, turning slowly. I'm smashing my head in the fucking bow. Don't do it, you only have one hit point.

I fall unconscious. Yeah. When I wake up, this will all be over. I do that, I do that. No, you don't. Yes, I do. Okay, Fjord. Fjord. Yep.

That's a bad idea. Don't do that. I do it. Okay, Fjord, in a fit of frustration and anger, once the rudder is locked in place and the ship begins to turn in the wrong position, just bashes his head in a very much so stupid movement. It doesn't knock you unconscious, but you're dizzy as fuck. You'd have to hit your head real hard on there to do a

point of damage. Do you want to do that? No, no. That's fine. Frustration's good. Frustration, you'll hurt yourself, but to take a point of damage. Frustration's good. Frustration, you'll hurt yourself, but to take a point of damage. Frustration's fine. Yeah. So you're like, there's a little bit of blood trickling out from where the head got mashed a little bit. The partially splintered wood from the explosion

of the fireball earlier. Oh god, are we going to sink? Why would you say that out loud? What's wrong with you? No, that's appropriate for today, yeah. So that ends Fjord's turn. Now the ship is moving, the ship on initiative 20 shifts and moves out.

Hey, look at this! Hey, look at us! There now, and is turning this way. So that brings us to Beau and Nott. Oh yeah. Okay, well I see Fjord bash his head against the wall and I go, you guys, I think Fjord's under some sort of influence magic.

He's on his own. And then I just yank the, then I go. You're just using your action to hold onto the sail. I go, tell me, tell me what to do! Oh right, you don't know how to steal a ship. You motherfucker! You're the only one, really. Cool under pressure.

Hoist the thing and then the other one. I try and interpret what he says. Okay. Hoist the thing. Listen to the thing, you eventually get her to figure it out but you get the sail situated and that'll be your action for the turn. Okay. Nott? I will spend my action seeing if there's any rope lying around and trying to tie the man's hands

up. Okay. There is a couple of coils of rope left there in the far corner. You have to release him to go get it. Yeah, I will keep him, and I will Mage Hand grab some rope and bring it over to me, but then that will be my action. Okay, so still holding him on, he's keeping quiet. The rope hovers over and plops next to you. And then bonus action, I will use Mage Hand

to start looping it around. Okay, okay. Go ahead and make a sleight of hand check for me. Okay. It's a general dexterity check, actually. You're not proficient in it, necessarily, so just add your dexterity modifier. 10.

Okay, you've begun the process. It's not an immediate. Oh, wait. No, it's just a seven. It's bad. You're not a master of rope tying, necessarily. This round, the ropes are slipping and Omerius is fighting against it a little bit. You're not getting too much of a hold on it. All right, that ends your go. The enforcer below, who has completed the... now is when he is ducked behind, because he lost his action to do that. He gets under the table, throws his weapon down, and goes,

What the fuck? Goes to pick up the weapon. That's his turn. Jester, you go. It's so ridiculous. Did he just break it? Is that what Caleb saw? He just realized he was being dumb. He's just doing it. He's just got to do it. No, but he performed the action. Right. I'm going to, as Jester's duplicate, I'm going to pull out my axe, the duplicate, and I'm going to act like she hits herself with it.

Oh, jeez. So stupid. And goes and falls into the water. That's pretty good. She commits suicide in front of him. The leader gawgles like, No! Who considers you a friend at the moment and is seemingly really distraught to watch this happen. What is happening? So she's going to be like, floating in the water.

Then I'm going to go. I take it you're not concentrating on your silent image anymore? I'm probably focusing on Marius. So no. No, I'm not. Okay. So that vanishes right as she kills herself.

Falls into the water, very confused. Then I'm going to, for my action as Jester, go and try to hold the door shut for the under. Okay. As soon as you move up to the door, holding it there. But I'm crawling! I'm crawling! I don't want them to see me. You're keeping low. It's a half movement, you still get there. You're prone. Okay.

All right, Caleb. I just want to clarify. I thought that I had told him to throw down his weapons and hide under the desk for his safety. That's not an ongoing thing. He did that, yeah. But you don't go down and then immediately stand up and get out again, do you? He saved from the spell. Oh you don't go down and then immediately stand up and get out again, do you? He saved from the spell. He's, well, no, he's.

Oh, he saved from the spell. No, no, no, how it works is you give them a task. Yeah. Right, and he went and hid under the table for safety, which he did. Hiding under the table for six seconds is a shitty job at hiding, but okay. Yeah, but it wasn't specific enough.

That's fine, that's fine. It wasn't a very specific suggestion. Okay, so I have to totally rethink everything, so give me 10 seconds. I will use my action to run forward and with the edges of my coat, put out the burning papers. Okay, all right. Are you downstairs? Yeah, he's down in the- I thought you were upstairs. No, you lock the burning papers. Okay, all right. Are you downstairs?

Yeah, he's down in the- Oh, I thought you were upstairs. No, you lock him down there. Oh god. He's, you're in here with me. Yeah. All right, so you go ahead and you put out the fire. You can see now, it looks like what was a map

that is mostly burned entirely. Do I see anything? On the map? As I'm doing this, yeah. Yeah, you see part of the coast and you see some notes and you see something on there. Quickly looking at it, there is information on it, yeah. But you're just putting it out. Okay, that's it, I'm done.

I would say that probably what I would have done, not knowing anything of that, was zip up to go up and then see that the door is shut and go. That's the end of my turn. All right, that's the end of your turn. That brings us to the guards' turn. The guards in the back are going to be shaking the man and the other guards like,

what are you doing? They're getting away! He's like, look, this is a very confusing scenario. Yes. We're trying to ascertain what's happening. They seem safe for now, but why did this dock explode? Also, there's a girl floating. She just killed herself.

Go check on her, make sure she's okay. The girl's like. I'm wearing armor that's not really supposed to spin. Natural 20. They're like, this is foul magic. He starts slapping him in the face. He's like, get away!

He's like, call a mage, we have to get this taken care of. Ooh, the mage. Call a mage. A mage or a mage? A mage. So they start shouting for help. Frumpkin's still hanging out over here. Oh, I...

I figured you would have blinked, Frumpkin. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was casting Find Familiar. So you still have an octopus Frumpkin with you. So yeah, the guards are now... Yeah, I interrupted that with a bite. Yeah. They're momentarily distracted by all the things that have happened, the ship getting away,

and their leaders essentially acting really dumb, and now ascertaining that it's magical. They don't know what to do, so they're just starting to shout out, and one of them's starting to leave and go to get help. They start darting this way, shouting. These guys all begin to inspect and try to see if they can find the poor woman. This guy dives into the water to try and see if he can save her. And this Naut is swimming in the water to try and see if he can save her. And is now swimming in the water going, where are you? No, you have so much to live for! That's their action. Caduceus. Oh no.

I'm swimming full speed out, directly out into the ocean. Right now? Caduceus is just. 30. You can't, that's as much as you can get, because it's half movement in the water. He's never seen the ocean before. Oh yeah, no, I'm not having a good time.

So brave. This is not going well for me. I'm not a happy camper. Do you even have darkvision? No. You're swimming out into the dark ocean. There's torches. Yeah, there is a single torch over here that is loosely lighting the vicinity.

I assume that there's some kind of light on the... Caduceus, you do have a high passive perception. There are shapes in the water below. Oh my god. Would I have noticed that before swimming 30 feet out? No, they weren't immediately at night with Nott. You're getting out under the dock and you, in a little bit of light

that's coming through from the moonlight, you look and you can see something in the water. Oh god. That ends your turn, Yasha's go. Oh, Yasha's. 40 feet off the dock. Goddamn it. Help me, Yasha!

I assist, Yasha assists Beau in getting the ship. Sure, so you're just holding on to the ship. Not much else to do. All right. He's going. Oh my god. All right, so at this point, Marius has not much else he can do.

Fjord, your turn. Keeping an eye out for Caduceus, start to steer the ship along the coastline. All right, make a perception check, please. It's a word. You don't see Caduceus, but you see an old... 18, you do. There's an old man swimming in the ocean.

You do see. Yeah, I got you. Geriatric patient. This could not be more fucked. I'm so happy. I would, I would, this went so far from any of my expectations. I loved End of the Dragon. Fuck that guy, we're just going to do this.

All right, so keeping up on that, ends Fjord's turn. The boat now moves on initiative count 20. Fucking weird old fucker out there. Up to there. Fucking skinny dippers? What the fuck? All right. Bear plunge?

That kind of city. Beau and Nott, we'll save for the purposes of expediency on this. I just need some help tying this fucker up and I bring him up to four. And of course the guy below. Yeah, I'm going to let Caleb out from below. I'm assuming I could have heard Caleb going.

You feel the door go, that's all you know. Okay. You assume I'm down there, I guess. You don't see Caleb on the ship. You're like, where's Caleb? Where's Caleb? I opened the door. Caleb! Caleb's standing there. Oh, Caleb!

All right. Caleb, you doing anything? Yeah, I turn to the guy. He picked up his weapons by now? Yeah, he's making his way up the stairs after you. Yeah, okay, I reach out and use a catapult and a draw, pulls out of the desk and slams it into the back of his head.

Go to roll for attack. 40 points of damage. Oh, sorry, next area's up. It's cocked. Natural six. Okay. Does the Ritzophilia so that was cocked. Natural six. Okay. Does the drawer have fruit in it, though? Yeah.

Well, yeah, scurvy, you know. 17 points of bludgeoning damage. 17 points of bludgeoning damage. From the back of the skull, he's like, and you can see him holding the back, he's holding the sword. It hurt, but he's still coming at you. Phew. I am standing next to Fjord and Beau. All right. With an immediate burst of speed and a rush, very akin to the flash making his way

through the city, Caleb appears there on top with Fjord and Beau. Feels good, man. The guy is now looking at you, Jester, you see the guy who had his sword out, looks confused and sees you and goes, and is going to come up with a sword. He doesn't realize how fucked he is. He doesn't know that the ship has been taken. He's feeling pretty confident. He's the only one having a worse day than us. Probably. All right, so on that, he's going to make his way towards you, Jester. He comes up and is going to make two swings at you, Jester. He comes up and is going to

make two swings at you. I use Hellish Rebuke. Well, the further you see it hit. That is going to be a 15 to hit. No. That is a 19 to hit. Okay, yes. I use Hellish Rebuke. All right, go for it. That is ten points of slashing damage to you. Okay.

Two-handed swings past you. He takes 21 points of damage back. He doesn't make a save, right? Yes. That is a, he rolled a natural 14, but has no bonus to his dex, so it's a 14. Yeah, it's only a 12 dex save. Oh right, because of racial ability, yeah.

So he saves, he takes half damage? Yeah. What did I say, 21? Half of that, 11. All right, yeah, so 11 points of damage. So this ice shard pierce out of the blast area and around his body he's like,. He's looking really hurt now and he's frustrated and his eyes are starting to go a little wild realizing that this is turning on him pretty heavily. All right. Yeah, I mean, Caduceus.

Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. You're like, as you're glancing over. I'm a bald hippie. Little help here. Oh, is that his voice? Oh yeah, no, I'm not doing a voice. Oh! Sounds so familiar.

Man. Not having a good day. Kill him! Whose turn is it to get him up? Yasha. All right, Yasha goes over and just takes and brings Caduceus back onto the ship. The fuck were you?

Who are you? Who are you? You're clearly a cad. A miracle. Oh fuck! Jorah needs healing. Um, do I, if I have just bonus action, I'm just going to bonus. You have a bonus action, so.

I'm just going to bonus. You have a bonus action. I'm just going to do a healing word just on Fjord before I start doing another. Prayer. Some other, yeah, before I start doing another prayer. But yeah, I'm just going to cast a healing word on Fjord really quickly. All right, you got it, Fjord. That's seven points of hit points.

Seven points to you. Fjord, anything? Just keeping the ship going? Just say, yeah. Can you go over to the back of the boat and see the name of the boat? On the 20 count, the boat continues on for another 20 or 30 feet, or actually 30 feet.

It's starting to get a little speed as it's picking up the wind and it's making its way, curving out towards the harbor. The guards have continued running off. These guys are all still searching for the body of the woman. Heroes. We did it, guys. Mission accomplished.

The enforcer would attack him in this round. I misheard that. The enforcer just attacks on you, Jester. Oh, okay. But can I hit back? Yeah, you can. It's your turn now. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm going to, I get two attacks, don't I? No, I just get one attack. You get one attack. Okay, instead of, I'm not going to, instead of killing him, I'm going to say, you probably don't want to attack me.

We've got the boat full of people. We just took your ship. You should put down your weapon. Make an intimidation check. As she has her hands up, you can see her flexing biceps. Yeah. Intimidation, 13. 13? He doesn't buy it. What? I'm right here! Look behind me, you stupid!

He's back in, the deck isn't very high, and he can't really look and see the ship before you entirely, he's just seeing you right there in the way and he's just hacking at you with his sword. The words don't come through, he thinks it's a bluff. Caleb. Oh my goodness. Okay, I will go down after Jester and stand behind her to see what the situation is with my movement. You're down next to her? Oh, goodness. I don't want to set the... I say, hey, why don't you put down that weapon and let's talk about this, and I cast Friends, which would be a disadvantage, I'm sure.

Cast Friends? Yeah. You have advantage on all charisma checks. You know, Jennifer Aniston. Yeah, so just, it's very dangerous, you're going to die probably sooner rather than later unless you want to talk sharp. Persuasion with disadvantage? Disadvantage.

No, with a straight, because you cast. Straight. Yeah. Yeah, so what'd you roll? Seven, oh shit. That's persuasion, 10. You guys are all standing at the door going like, come on, bud, come on, and he's like, no! No! You're lying!

I don't want to burn off a boat. Yeah, the guards aren't an issue anymore at the moment. Caduceus, anything you need to do? I'm just sitting, starting a prayer of healing. All right, gotcha. Bring it back. Fjord, anything? Told him the ship. The ship continues off. You guys are picking up speed now as the wind is coming and the ship's now making its way. Honestly, I think we did a pretty good job after everything. You turned it around a little bit. That was going bad.

This is fucking fun. Oh yeah. That's why I love when shit goes wrong like this. This is my favorite moments in D&D. The enforcer's going to go ahead and take two more attacks on you. Nobody's going down there to help Jester. I don't know. You know what? I'm just going like, ow, ow. You know what, no.

He does see Caleb, now actively takes a look behind, and then turns around and runs down below the deck. Wait, there's more below? No, he just ran back down. You do get an attack of opportunity if you want to take a gesture. Okay, yeah. Kill him.

It's all the dead. No, I mean, it has to be at my handaxe. That definitely hits 25. Yeah, that will hit. Go ahead and roll damage. Ten points of damage. As he turns around, you're like, no, wait! Into the back of his skull. He just falls and slides down the stairs, limply.

You know, I think I'm going to use my cantrip, spare the dying, and make sure he doesn't die-die. Does he die-die? I mean, you put an ax to the back of his head. I didn't want to kill him. That wasn't my goal, but I didn't say that out loud. You didn't say that out loud. Stress of the moment. He dead. It's not your turn. You don't want to use action because it's a reaction.

Oh, okay. So you wouldn't be able to use it the next round. Sorry, it really wasn't my intention to, okay. So you wouldn't be able to use it the next round. Sorry, it really wasn't my intention to do that. I was aiming for his shoulder, and I missed and hit his head. It wasn't my intention, the name of this episode. That's great. That's great.

That would be AC of Wood. AC of Wood. AC of Wood's a good album title. So. From Wasn't My Intention. So, as you pull away out into the main harbor, Fjord, for the first time in a long time, you feel,

as the stress of the sequence passes over you, the sensation of being at the helm of a ship bypasses the momentary frustration. It feels good to feel that wind in your hair again and to be guiding it through the waters and seeing the dark horizon in the distance. You feel that bald rage subside. Looking past, you can see the guards are still running

up the streets with their torches. There'll probably be a search party. You can never go back. The good news is you don't think they were paying attention to the back of the ship, thanks to the distraction that you said, so they don't know the name of the ship. So that might help to your advantage. Which is? It is called...

The Widows of Brink's. Yeah, I know. No, it is not. It is called The Mist. Ooh! With an I or a Y? With an I. The Mist. I don't know why. With an eye. A miss. Now pushing past midnight to the very early morning hours,

you make your way out and as far away from the edge, you can see the lights of Nicodranas begin to fade a bit, just enough where you can feel comfortable. Marius is there bound by ropes. They're still wild ahead and looking at all the distances. Um, all right then. Who the fuck are you? Who the fuck are you, you piece of shit?

We know who he is. We know his name. No, I know I know who he is! I'm asking him, you fucking piece of shit! That's all we know is his name. My name is Marius Laporte. Yeah, no, we know! I'm saying you're a piece of shit.

What did I do? So many things. I'm very confused. What were you doing on the docks this evening? He looks around and he's like, I was coming to tell some business contacts of mine that something they'd hired me for didn't pan out. Yeah.

Do you happen to know where those business contacts came from, these people? Do you know? I don't know, they're very mysterious. Would it mean anything if we said that we come bearing gifts and that we are looking to see the captain, I'll reach behind my hand and use Minor Illusion and create a little replica of the Cat Eye sphere and hold it out in front of him.

Okay. He goes, Oh. Why didn't you say that at the beginning? No, I did say that. I kind of did. I was like, gentlemen, does, yeah, gentlemen. Never mind, I was just.

Well, I don't know a gentleman. I just know I was supposed to look for that delivery. From who? Whoever was going to bring it. I didn't expect you to come in here and slaughter my contacts. What are your ambitions with it? I thought I was going to make some coin, pass it over. That was it.

He's a runner. Who were you supposed to deliver it to? I don't know, mysterious folk. Did you just kill it? Mysterious folk, where were you supposed to drop it off? You knew where you were supposed to deliver it, so where were you supposed to deliver it? It was supposed to come find me in the cove,

never showed up, and they'd been waiting in town for a few days, and they were coming back, and this was the night where I was supposed to tell them, either bring it to them or the deal was off, and I was supposed to give back the money that I owed them. So, uh... I would like to just point out that you're trapped on this boat with us.

I know that! I'm very well aware of that right now. I'm a little freaked out, not going to lie. Tomorrow, my blue friend is going to, if we need to, cast a spell on you and make you tell us everything we want to know. Why waste that time? Make an intimidation check.

There's also maps downstairs. I don't know that, he knows that, never mind. Mm, 21. 21. Right, I'm being truthful. I know that it was supposed to be for a captain. Captain Vantika. Vantika.

She's a right intense person. I've only seen her once. She doesn't really leave her ship in port when she's in, which is rare. Her reputation keeps her not from coming in directly. What's the name of her ship? Well, her ship is the Squall Eater. Squall Eater?

Her reputation keeps her from coming in. What is her reputation? She... She's a bit of a forceful taker of things she wants. She's a pirate! That's one word to say. If you want to find her, your best bet's probably somewhere in the Suavein Islands, or don't know

where directly. I'm just hired as the errand boy. Svavain? Svavain. Svavain? Svavain. I didn't spell that. Svavain. S-W-A-V-A-I-N.

Svavain Islands, is that what you said? Yeah, Svoyn Islands. Svoyn. Says, I'm just supposed to come back here, supposed to meet up with the folks of the Mist, the ship that you've now commandeered. You killed them all. So what are you going to do with me?

That is a good question. Honestly, really. I'm useful, I'm helpful. I can swab the deck, I can cook. Ooh! What can you cook? That's interesting. I mean, what you got? We don't know what we got. We stole this ship. Yeah, yeah, you did.

Did we pat him down? No. I'll pat him down. Make an investigation check. By this point, by the way, everyone has 16 hit points added to their. 18. pat him down. Make an investigation check. By this point, by the way, everyone has 16 hit points added to their. 18. 18 for investigation.

Okay, yeah, you find a pouch of 20 platinum pieces. Whoa! That's the money he was going to return. That's what he got paid. You find another pouch that's hidden within his belt pouch that contains 62 gold pieces, three silver, 50 copper, and what looks to be a pouch of chewing tobacco.

Mm. Okay. What looks to be a pouch of chewing tobacco. Okay. Got it. Could be spice. Looks to be a pouch of chewing tobacco. Okay. Got it. Could be spice. Well, so you're not going to kill me, right?

We're not sure yet. We're probably not going to kill you. That's good odds. I'll take those odds. Can you at least loosen these a bit? Tighten them and tie them to the mast, will ya? Let's go check out the things below. Yasha just picks them up and ties them to the mast. He's like,.

Maybe you'll earn your way to that, we'll see. Okay, well, where are we going then? We'll find out soon enough. I take a handkerchief and I shove it through his mouth, just tying that around, too. I mean, we already said what to. I know, but we don't know who this letter was written to. Do we? We just know who it was from

and what it was telling the person to... Oh wait, no, it's for... Ionos. Ionos. Does he know? Do you know Ionos? Oh, take the thing off. Do you know Ionnos? No, I didn't know an Ionnos. Oh no.

Well, I'm glad we killed a half dozen people to know what we already knew. We didn't know that already. We did not know about this. Is Vantika or her ship? She's her name, right here. It says, meet the captain of Vantika. We didn't know that already. We did not know about this. Is Vantika or her ship? Sure, she's her name. Right here, it says, Meet the Captain of Vantika.

We didn't know anything about her. We could have asked. We didn't know what her ship was about. Let's go downstairs, maybe we can find something useful. To be fair, the goal was to just ask, and then it got out of hand. Maybe there'll be lunch meats down there, we can make a sandwich.

Caleb's heading down to start searching. As you guys all head down below deck to take in what exactly you have at your disposal as you are now the current owners of the Mist. You guys, we own a ship! A ship, a dog, an owl, a ferret. We don't have a dog anymore. Oh yeah, Professor Thaddeus!

Hoo, hoo! Professor Thaddeus! Hoo! Hoo! Professor Thaddeus! Professor Thaddeus is somewhere at the city. Oh! First splash down! Splash one! I'm going to try to throw up some bait. Hoo! Make an animal handling check.

Okay, okay, okay, I'm going to roll big. I'm not going to roll big. He's just going to tear that coat check guy for a mile out to sea. No, you had him! I had him with me, 19. Not while fighting. Not while fighting. But yeah, imagine when I fought,

I was like, go hang out. Total of what? 19. 19. You're shouting out to the sky. Time passes. No Professor Thaddeus. He's eating mice. He is, he's happy.

He's happier that way. He was like me, he's not meant to be a tiger. Wow, I want to say it so bad, I'm not going to say it. So as you want. He's doing what he loved best, just ignoring everything. We'll probably have a burial at sea. He's not dead. He's just running far away from me.

Or he's chasing the ship and he can't catch up. So. Professor! Okay, okay, zero in. As you head down below deck to take stock of what you have, we're going to end there. We'll pick up next week.

Best, best episode. I think it was fun! Honestly, I think it was terrible, but it was cool. Yeah, it was so much fun. Oh man, that was a lot. Think about when we got our flying carpet. We didn't mean to get the flying carpet, we ended up bringing the entire tower down upon ourselves, right?

That's fair. That map is gorgeous. Yeah. Thank you, that was fun. What would the captain have told us, though? Who knows? Who knows? He got splattered. He didn't even make an attack. He was getting ready to do it. No, he didn't. Who knows? Who knows? He got splattered.

He didn't even make an attack. No, he didn't. He was going to be the nasty one. Yay! So anyway, well done, guys. You have a boat. And a handful of people in the city that saw your faces. Most of your faces.

Man, thanks for that. You keep presenting with stuff that we don't really want, but then we see it and we're like, we need it! And then we don't want it, like animals. Now we have a boat. But we have a weasel, and your mom has a puppy. Yay. And there's an owl somewhere.

Well, think about nobody that saw us in the city saw us taking the boat, live to tell the tale. Just kidding, all of the guards right there did. Nicodranas! Yeah. Do we go on to the next town, or do we try to? Well, back to the Empire. That's up to you guys to figure out

next time you come around. So. well done. We'll pick this up next week and see where the Mighty Nein are going, what they're planning to do, and what the next leg of their adventure is. Until then, have a wonderful night, have a wonderful week, we love you, and is it Thursday yet?

Good night. Oh my god. Let's go join that fire. Thank you so much for joining us on this adventure. To help new listeners discover the show, please give us a rating and review on whatever podcasting app you're listening on. Until next time, is it Thursday yet?