Critical Role - C2E98 Dark Waters

Episode Date: March 12, 2020

The Mighty Nein reset after their intense interactions at the party to prepare for their voyage to the peace talks, but nothing can prepare them for the danger that awaits on the high seas...Watch Critical Role live Thursdays at 7pm PT on https://www.twitch.tv/criticalrole

Hello, spellcasters, sages, and spectators. I'm Ashley Johnson, and you're listening to the Critical Role Podcast Network. Tap into our magical narrative by watching Critical Role as it airs on Thursdays at 7 p.m. Pacific on twitch.tv slash criticalrole or youtube.com slash criticalrole. Twitch subscribers can watch the video on demand right away, or you can catch it the following Monday on YouTube. As always, Critical Role will be available right here in podcast form on Thursdays, a week after the initial broadcast. And now, let's scry into the story and see what mysteries it holds for us, shall we?

Hello everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons. We play Dungeons & Dragons! Just like that. Before we get into tonight's session, we have a few announcements to get through, beginning with our fantastic sponsor for tonight,

our friends since the beginning of the campaign, too, D&D Beyond. Sam. D&D Beyond. Thanks! D&D Beyond. Thanks to D&D Beyond for continuing to support the show. The Wildemount Campaign Guide is only a few short weeks away from being released. Go grab it and find out more at dndbeyond.link.

Dot link. Slash Critical Role. To celebrate this amazing literary achievement, I'm going to present to you a musical spectacle tonight that you've never seen before. We have, D&D Beyond has a theme song that I, Sam Riegel, wrote, recorded, and vocalized. But Ashley Johnson is such a beloved fan of the song

that she does not know how the melody goes. It's crazy how much I've listened to it and know it so well. So tonight, I proudly present Ashley Johnson singing the D&D Beyond theme song, a cappella. A cappella? Yeah, a cappella. Without having listened to it ahead of time.

That was a genuine reaction. She's got the lyrics. She can use them if she needs them, but I know she's such a huge fan of the show and the song, she won't need them. Take it away, Ashley. You got the perfect warlock, her weapons and supplies.

Close? But you need a place to check your stuff because you're so disorganized. No. No. No. You click open a webpage. That's the same.

You heard about our critical role. That's good. And now you're ready to kick some butt in a mineshaft full of gnolls. I heard is, it's D&D! D&D Beyond. That's good, that's good. It's D&D! You got your snaps, you got your swords, you got your stuffs.

And you got your invisible wand. It's D&D! D&D! D&D! D&D, D&D, D&D, D&D! D&D Beyond! Yay, Ashley! It was a pitch-perfect performance. Thank you so much. So good, thank you.

I know it well. That was magnificent. Oh, thank you, Ashley. Thank you, D&D Beyond. Matt, back to you. I can't wait to listen to that song. It's going up on Spotify next week. Someone's going to throw some instruments under it?

Yeah. It'll be great. One of you predators that go out there, mix your own version of Ashley Johnson's D&D Beyond theme. No, don't do it. We don't need it. No, no. Five to suffer through Sam's shirts every week. Fair enough. I'm dragging you with me.

Thank you, D&D Beyond, for your fantastic support and super excited for the Wildemount campaign guide. The Explorer's got a Wildemount to come out in like less than two weeks. That's insane! So excited for you guys to check it out. It's a lot of hard work from a lot of great people and myself, I'm really proud of it and hope you guys enjoy it.

So if you haven't pre-ord of it and hope you guys enjoy it. So if you haven't pre-ordered it yet, you can still, or buy it when it comes out at your local game store. Couple of announcements. Yeah, see it. There you go. Big thanks to all the fantastic critters that came out to C2E2, as well as our live show last Thursday.

Thank you for your patience, as there were issues with the ticketing system and other things that ended up causing this huge delay, so thank you so much for your patience in very, very harsh weather. Sucked, and we are so glad that you guys made it, and it was a great show, and thank you for attending it, and thank you guys for watching it.

Yeah. Yay. It was so good. I know. It was so much fun. I do want to say, though, our hearts here at Heracross do go out to everyone in Nashville who've suffered and been devastated by these tornadoes recently.

If you're able to, please consider donating to any of the repeatable non-profit organizations that are working to help provide aid for the people in need and provide assistance in those areas. We, like the Community Foundation of Middle Tennessee, so you can make a donation if you'd like to there at cfmt.org, but do your research

and find the right folks to donate to. But thank you for helping out. Laura, you have an announcement? I do. Balls, balls, balls. Pretty good. Well, there's a couple good ones in there. There's my announcement.

No. You guys might have noticed in the store right now, we got some shirts available. We got, okay, wait, hold on. I'm waiting, I'm not going to be waiting. You have one first. This is by Brian Weiss. Ooh!

Ooh! Ooh! This is in Xem'nian and in Common. What does it say, Caleb? Well, it says, Ooh! Ooh! Oh!

Oh! So Hause liegt im Herzen, which is a close approximation of home is where the heart is. Oh. Wow. Yeah, so this was conceptualized by Liam O'Brien, which is pretty freaking cool. And then, for our special UK shoppers,

we've got another one. It's the same shirt, but it's a different color. Ooh! Ooh, it looks British. It doesn't? This one's got an accent. Like it has history? Yeah.

It's a little bit smarter than the other one. So yeah. Those are our shirts that are available. We also have, which is something I've been wanting to have for a very long time, are some stickers. We got stickers! We got vinyl stickers by Jenny Park. They're the same.

Ooh! I'm opening them, so these are mine now. So we got our Mighty Nein logo and we got all of the chibi people. Woo! What can you stick them on, Laura? You can stick them on anything. Could I stick it on my water bottle?

You could definitely stick it on your water bottle. Right now? Sure. They're vinyl. I'm going to die. That's the slogan. They're vinyl. I'm going to die. That's the slogan. They're vinyl. Nice. So yeah, go look at the star. You're going to put the flower on the box.

Thank you, Laura. You want to put it on? Yeah, that's the way to do it. All right. Oh, that's so cute. Which one did you pick? Clay. Aw. I was going to pick my own character. Now I feel so guilty about it.

He's an old love. What is that? I didn't say anything. No. Not. Anyway, I believe that's the end of our announcements. So let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role.

Sure. Critical Role. The adventure begins They were always beside you Your nerdy best friends And the DM to guide you And they rise from the flames For the battles ahead Villains beware Cause you're about to be dead

They got magic and flair They got falchions and cunning They don't see over there There's a monster incoming Inspiration is waiting Rise up, don't think twice Put your fate in your hands, take a chance, roll the dice Roll the dice

Critical Roll the dice Critical Roll the dice Critical Roll the dice Critical Can you answer the call?

Digging deep in your soul As the legend unfolds Now it's your turn To roll Wow. That was good. I've been holding on to that for a while. Welcome back.

So, last we left off, the Mighty Nein had returned to Nicodranas to prepare their travel towards the negotiation between the Kryn Dynasty and the Dwendalian Empire. Upon arriving and settling yourselves, you, one, discovered that on one of the vessels, which was built and belongs to, built by and belongs to the Cerberus Assembly, that a few members were present,

as well as a new figure that you had not encountered before. After a bit of monkey espionage, you revealed this individual to be Essek in disguise, who revealed to have some connection with the Cerberus Assembly. As the intrigue continued to spread, you completed the transmogrification spell on Nott with the curse lifted

and restored Veth Bernardo as she was always meant to be. After a bit of shopping, you also were invited to a party at the local Marquis estate. Upon attending, you convinced Marion Lavorre to go and perform through a series of spells. Beau had a very interesting altered experience. Yeah.

Some fancy dress that was purchased and designed by Caduceus and Jester. I love it. And upon realizing that Essek, within the illusory form, was attempting to escape when pressured at the party, you manage to subdue him and escort him to your ship at the docks.

There, an interrogation led you to some revelations, some emotions, and where we left off, a bit of a climactic conversation continues. So as now all of you there, dressed to the nines in the shadowed gun deck of the Ball Eater. Essek sits upon the crate as you all surround and inquire.

You had just made an invitation to the Mighty Nein to Essek as a thank you. Essek, at this point, looks up to you, Veth, and Oh, also, I'm the goblin from before. Right, no, I didn't. As soon as it worked, then yes. Yeah, we moved to the impediment. We discussed with you, yeah. Yeah, we broke my mom's tub doing...

Mama. I got to go, I got to go, I got to go! I run out of the room. Okay. Very well. That was immediate. I'll chase after her. All right. Is this the thing we're doing, or?

No, no, no, this is important. We should stay here. Okay. I appreciate what you're saying. I am thankful that you have a modicum of faith in me, and deserving as I may it be. It is in that interest that I just want to warn you about getting too close. I am tied to a lot of dangerous individuals

and a teacher in the shadows at the crux of all of this conflict, intentional as it may not have been. I never want to put you in a situation, or put myself in a situation where I would have to choose between myself and the rest of you. Why don't you talk us through the next few days and weeks. Well, I currently exist in a delicate balance with the Cerberus Assembly,

for either could reveal the charade to the detriment of the other. There is respect, at least I believe, on an intellectual level, but I am but one working across from many. I think my utility with the Assembly, continuing to cover up this endeavor from the inside of the Dynasty,

as well as my insights into the Dunamatic interests, make me too valuable at the moment to be buried. That doesn't mean that I can stop being paranoid. valuable at the moment to be buried, but that doesn't mean that I can stop being paranoid, nor can I assume that my presence to you doesn't put you in continuous danger either. So, in time, I hope this will pass,

but for now, we will, I will continue to escort a handful of assembly members to this negotiation. And if you are indeed coming with your ship as well, you will be nearby. You will oversee the transference of the beacon to the Dynasty, as well as the trade of the prisoners.

Some discussions and agreements will hopefully come to bear and to bring the outer conflict, the public conflict, to an end. After which, we stay quiet, go back to the Dynasty. The Assembly returns to their research, and we continue as if none of this had happened.

Well. Well... It's hard to forecast out past the next few days, but, I mean, let's not kid ourselves that at some point, someone is going to have to pay for some of the damage that has been done. I admire your sense of heroism, but pay for some of the damage that has been done. I admire your sense of heroism, but history is full of people who have not paid for their sins. Full of a lot of people who have.

Or people who've paid for others. And while we feel a kinship towards you, and apparently you towards us, unless you're lying about that, there's nothing necessarily stopping us from enacting justice on other folks who have been involved in this scheme. I am not going to get in the way of any

perceived vengeances, just to know that it is safest that I not involve myself in particular with such endeavors. Of course. It might help us, though, if we knew if there were any members of the Cerberus Assembly or anyone that you are particularly beholden to

or allied with that we should steer clear of or be especially mindful of? The Martinet is extremely intelligent and very resourceful, so the less that can be revealed to him, the safest we all are. Lady Vess DeRogna is clever in her own way.

And I am curious to what her involvement is to the Biting North in particular. I may or may not be involved in this, but I trust her less than most, I think. Are you prepared for all of this to go sideways on you? Always. I have been for the three years since we began this plot. I feel conflicted about this,

but would like to see even a temporary end to conflict. Well, outwardly. Why do you keep saying that? What does that mean? I would hope that in your studies within the Cobalt Soul, you understand that conflict is perpetual. I do.

I'm just curious what your brand is. Well, he has acknowledged that they are keeping one of these artifacts in the Empire, and they are not doing it for posterity's sake. I mean, there has been a shadow war between the Dynasty and the Empire for decades. This is just the first time that it's brimmed out of the control of those that waged it.

When the Dynasty finds out that there's another artifact. They cannot. When they find out. I mean. Let's hope we are far away and well-protected when it happens. Let's hope it takes a very long time, or that it make its way home

without anyone ever having to admit it was gone in the first place. Doesn't seem like you have a choice here. You seem fairly well painted into a corner. So it would seem. But I've gotten this far by leaning into my resources. I know I can protect myself.

I don't think I can protect all of you. And that is why I'm worried. Well, I would just hope that if things go pear-shaped on us, counter to how you hope and believe things will go, if your life is in danger and our lives as well, that you are willing to work with your friends to survive it. To survive it, yes.

Make no mistake. We do not trust you. Good. That'll help you survive. Doesn't mean we don't hope for you. It's a tricky balance, Essek. Isn't everything. Even if this is successful,

and the war is declared over, that doesn't mean everything goes back to normal. The tangled espionage between both sides of this has gone on for long and will continue to go. The Ogryn Trust is deeply ingrained, as is the Lens. We just have to be careful who we tell anything to. My recommendation is nothing to anyone. Well, if there's anything that we are adept at, it's being careful and keeping information

close to the vest. Oh. We are in so much trouble. Serious. And there's no one else, no one else has your ear in this way? No. Please try and keep us informed. Of course.

The best of my ability. Of course. Once again, for my devil, it's worth it, I'm sorry. Apology accepted, at least from here. Once again, for whatever it's worth, I am sorry. Apology accepted, at least from here. He doesn't speak for all of us. I definitely do not. Why don't you get some rest, Essek? You do the same.

Night is still young, I would hate for you to waste such a polished presentation. Night is still young. I would hate for you to waste such a polished presentation. He sits up off his crate and glides back to his faint hover. Good night. And his illusion once more transitions to the blonde elven figure that he's been masquerading as

since his arrival in Nikasanas. He waits tensely to make sure that he can leave. If you truly hope for a second chance, truly, step very carefully with us. If you truly hope for a second chance, truly, step very carefully with us. Glide. And he just leaves. Well, that's a pickle. What the fuck?

Is it? Make a history check. Oh. Answer your question. Oh, wow. 23. Okay. You did hear him mention the Augentrust and the Lens. You said the Lens, what is that?

Did you say the O? The Augentrust, which you know is from, because there's been a lot of, they're a competitive force with the Cobalt Soul in the sense that they are the Crown's spy network. Augentrust. in the sense that they are the Crown's spy network. Ogden Trust. On the Empire side? On the Empire side. It's often that the Cobalt Soul and the Ogden Trust

butt heads and sometimes find themselves in similar spaces going for similar information for different reasons and are very competitive and tense about achieving their own unique means. So the Cobalt Soul is an independent organization? Yep. Yes. Not affiliated with any. Wow. I thought it was loosely Empire.

In the sense that it's an approved religious institution within the Empire that works alongside in some ways, but is very much, presents itself as a subtle check and balance to the Empire, and the Empire does not. So they appreciate that and just push back on both sides in this really strange in-between space. They're international, too, as well.

Correct, correct. The Lens? The Lens is the Bright Queen's spy network in the Dynasty. That's a good name. And so his talk of shadow wars and espionage, in your mind, you immediately begin to put together that this is... What he was talking about.

Yeah, this is what he was referring to. Cold War all the time. At least in recent times. Interesting. Okay. Well, nothing changes if everybody's on the up and up. I think, if anything, this illuminates a bunch of mysteries pretty thoroughly.

It's, on a certain level, the best this could have possibly worked out. We now know why they have had to. We now know what they were hiding. This is, this feels helpful. Well, it's a moment in time. The Empire is obviously trying to leverage their possession for a later day.

An end to killing now is better than no end to the killing. Always. But as far as this meeting goes, I will happily be mistaken, but I find it hard to believe that Martinet and his friends are genuine in their intentions. Of course not.

I still fear for the artifact they are returning. The beacon, I worry they have tampered with it somehow. Well, we need to be close to the action when this meeting takes place. Now more than ever. We should probably discuss that, make a little bit of a plan that we definitely will not follow. Sure, that's what we do.

But if all goes well, and there's a temporary truce or whatever, then maybe afterwards we can use this information to bring some folks on the Empire side to justice. I'm not on board for that. What? I'm not interested in, I don't understand what it's for.

Well, they've done horrible, evil things that killed thousands of people. What if in our search for punishment, we create more horrible, evil things. What if we reignite the war? I think that is very likely, Caduceus. I will not stand by and let someone's desire to feel better get in the way of just...

You can stand by and... And more lives. You can just watch bad people get away with it? They did what they did. All we can do, the best I think we can do, is just stop it. I don't see the sense in risking other people. If there's a way to do it,

if you, if there's a way to do it that's safe, that maintains the peace, certainly, but I don't see that. I mean, you're smarter than I am. Do you see a way of enacting vengeance or justice or whatever you want to call it that will make the dead feel better, will make the living feel better,

will create more broken lives? I just don't see what it's for. will make the living feel better, will create more broken lives. I just don't see what it's for. I'm happy to learn, but I'm, it just sounds like more chaos. Sometimes justice can bring closure, Caduceus. The only thing I've ever found that brings closure is when everyone's finally on the ground. From my experience.

We have no choice but to see this meeting through. Of course. Yasha, you spent time, most of your life, in the Empire, in the Dynasty. What do you think? Both sides are guilty here, deeply. Yeah, both sides are guilty. I think I just had a different experience with it.

You know, I mean, my tribe, we floated across the lands without any connection to either side. But I don't quite know where I stand on this, to be honest. Yeah, me neither. And that's really weird for me. I feel no obligation to the guilty, but I do feel it to the innocent.

I mean, my, maybe it's because I have a personal connection here, but my husband was kidnapped and imprisoned partially due to this by Essek's people. I'd love to get him some payback for that. Does your husband want payback? I don't want to speak for him, but yes! There might be a way to do this slowly and over time,

but not now, Not anytime soon. I agree. I think if we blow this wide open now, and I fault our country far more heavily than the Dynasty, but if we try to grasp justice wildly now, as you say, Caduceus, it will spark the conflict. More people will die. I think we try to bring this day through

and then find a way to surgically remove the problem after the fact, rather than just blasting it wide open. No, that would be really dumb. Be gentle in your motives, is all I ask. Always, it's always worth thinking about what you really want. It's the only thing that really matters. It's the one the murderers removed from power in my country.

Why? Really, why? Because I'm tired of children being thrown on the pyre. That's what you really don't want. That's what you want, though. You want no more children on the pyre. Always remember that. You don't want to punish the people who made you.

You want to make sure that no one else makes you. You'll get there quicker. I don't know, Caduceus. Me neither. I will try and help. No more children. That I can get behind. I can get behind that as well. Speaking of children,

I wonder if Jester's found her mom yet. I'm sure she has dissolved, too. I'm going back to the classroom! After rushing through the night streets of Nicodranas, the distant sound of high tide waves crashing on the shore, getting more and more distant as you pass through the opal archways, you come to the soft, distant sound of music.

Slow down. Slow down, this incredible wind drag. Just take it over already! Just take the hat off! You bought this for me! Fjord, look at me. It was a joke. What? The hat was a joke.

It can't be. I've gotten so many compliments on it today. It's part of my look. If you like it, embrace it, but I got this as a joke. Fuck this hat. Wow! Fjord Frumpkin.

Do we hear her singing still? No. Fuck. You rush up to the gates and the guards are there. You can see that there's still people in the courtyard that are currently still talking amongst themselves. There's soft music playing. The guards step aside and let you enter the courtyard. You quickly glance across the entire crew

and you do notice your mother is currently surrounded by about six or seven people. There's laughter and she's talking. She has what looks to be a wine flute in her hand. Immediately, she locks eyes with you across the way and goes, Jester, I was wondering where you went. and immediately she locks eyes with you across the way and goes, Chester! I was wondering where you went.

There, I got pulled away for a conversation, but you sounded beautiful, Mama. Thank you very much. You're occupied. Do you want to continue? Honestly, this has been very nice. I'm missing the comfort of my own room. But thank you, everyone.

It has been a pleasure to the Marquis. And she gives a nod and. If you enjoyed our company, come and see her at the Lava Chateau. She appears there a few nights, too, I don't remember. You should check it out. Thank you, Jester. She turns and a few people wave

and she hands her glass over to one of the guards who's like, I don't know what to do with this, and just holds it and strolls out toward the edge of the gate, takes a breath, puts her arm around yours, and then pushes into the night, back towards the chateau. Walk on the other side of her, it's helpful.

Oh, yes. Thank you so much. Well, that was very exhilarating. I'm very proud of you. Thank you. Everyone was so enthralled. Yeah. But that's what I do. Thank you for helping me with that.

Of course, I'm sorry we had to step away for a moment. I'm sure you had your reasons. Thank you for your help. Of course, Beau and I were able to stay for a bit more of your performance before the night really kicked into a different gear. It was thrilling, though. I can see where Jester gets all of her exuberance

and personality. It was quite amazing. Thank you very much. What happened to your hat? You know, it was such a hit, someone just up and snatched that bitch in the middle of the party. That is unfortunate. I agree.

I can have another one made for you. Oh, could you? I'll pull some strings. Yes, and then you'll have to wear it all the time for it, because it will be a gift from Mama. All right, would love that. I can see your discomfort. Do not worry, it's okay.

Oh, no, I, I. Just give him for it, just say it's okay, don't do it. I, oh, don't do it or do it? Don't do it! Fuck, what? Um, no. Let what you want be known to the world. I really don't wear a hat very well. It's not my thing. Well, that's not true.

You look fabulous in it, but I know you don't. I'll fucking pick one. Which one is it? Do I wear it or not? You're not going to wear it. I don't wear hats very well. Unless you really want to. I mean, I don't want to. I'll take the hat. First delivery.

So be it. You guys head back to the chateau, escort her back to her room. It's pretty late now in the evening. But she goes ahead and kisses you goodnight. Thank you again. I am, as Jester would say, chest pooped. Puped.

Puped. Puped. Good night. Good night, Mama. And she closes the door. Thank you, Fjord. You're welcome. She's a charming woman. Let's see why she has all the suitors and attention every night.

Everyone really loves her. Yeah. I can't feel my hamstrings. I think I pulled something. You can walk much slower back. Do you mind? Not at all. This coat does not breathe. It's lovely, but fuck.

I wonder what they all decided. Who? Oh, yes! Should we head back to the docks? I mean, probably. I guess I can send a message to everyone, see where they are now. It's so strange. When the message doesn't come from you,

it's very alienating. I think everyone's just used to hearing you send messages. Caleb sent me one. It sent this night down a whole other rabbit trail. Oh, really? Yep. Yeah, you and Beau seemed a little... Beau was tripping balls. There was all sorts of things.

She was swinging at stuff that wasn't there. Really? Yeah, we unmasked like a dragonborn fellow. I turned around, and he just, poof! He was gone! What? I know. What the heck was going on? I don't know. I was just trying

to talk to Essek, and then all this hell broke loose. Yeah, we thought we'd keep an eye on the room, and then we thought we were doing the real investigative digging, and turns out, nope, we're just fucking things up. I was going to talk to him and then start talking about how much I liked Essek, and then all of a sudden, Nott had paralyzed him or something?

I don't remember, it was weird. Nott paralyzed Essek? I think so. Yeah. That sounds about right. And then Caleb, you know, put him? I think so. Well, that sounds about right. Caleb, you know, put him in chains, so. Yeah. Yeah. Should we get that fellow down from the balcony

that was harassing your mother? Oh. Oh, I should have told Mama about that. I mean, there's no way they could trace that back to you, though. Oh, well. I'm pretty sure I saw it was me, and I'm pretty sure the spell's probably worn off by now,

and I'm pretty sure it's exactly what I did before, so yeah, he's going to be pretty pissed. I think we actually went up there and tried to scare him a little bit, so maybe he'll keep his mouth shut. Oh, good. The good news is... No, no, it's worn off. No good news. Never mind. The good news is... No, no, it's worn off.

No, no good news. Never mind, no good news. Yeah. Good, good. Yeah. You look lovely this evening. Oh, thank you. You did a good job. We should make this our new vibe.

Our new look, we should be informal wear all the time. I don't know, I think people actually paid us respect. Well, you do look quite ashy, and you look like a captain. Thank you, without the hat? Without the hat. Yeah, because I went up to Captain Dremi, guess what, no fucking hat. Well, maybe a smaller hat.

That one was really big. He's a dwarf, he didn't have a hat. He's not. What the fuck? was really big. He's a dwarf. He didn't have a hat. He's not. Nope. What the? Hold on, I'm going to send a message. Hey, everyone, are you still at the docks or are you coming back to the Chateau, or where should we meet you?

Is Essek still around, or what's going on? Who did you send that to? Who did you send that to? Beth. Essek still around, or what's going on? Who did you send that to? Beth. Oh! Oh! Essek gone. Screamed a couple times, Essek is gone.

Us en route to Chateau. Oh, she's really bad at this. Stopping for a quick bite. Oh. Tell if you need us, pick up anything. Fire bad. Yeah, she suggested before that I use less words and make more ideas present,

but it was very confusing when she just did it, so. I said before that I use less words and make more ideas present, but it was very confusing when she just did it, so. Yeah, I think they're going to get some dinner or something. But she didn't say where. Oh shit. I mean, do we want to, can you send another one? As long as we go to sleep. Well, you know, we could just grab a bite.

Yeah, I mean, they're on their way back. We might as well just go get something. Maybe we'll find them there. Do you have a favorite spot around here? I didn't really go out very much for food. Oh, that's right, you hid. Well. We could order in. Yeah, they've got wonderful food downstairs.

Yeah. Okay. All right, we're going to go downstairs and eat. All right. At the Chateau. All right, so you guys have a Chateau dinner. The rest of you guys, what are you doing? Welcome back. All right, so you're picking up a snack on the way, sure. Yeah, we went to a herring stand.

All right, yeah, the fish market. Real popular recently. Uh-huh. Okay, you guys come back to the Chateau We're going to a herring stand. All right. The fish market, real popular recently. Okay. You guys come back to the chateau and you catch up as Jester and Fjord are eating, finishing up their meal down within the main area, which is mostly empty now.

Is it candlelit? Is it, are we walking in on anything? We're just sitting at a table having some food. Do you want some ice cream? Oh, hi. Hi. Really good ice cream here. How did it go? So good.

I mean, all things considered. It's pretty delicate, actually. We let him go. Oh. Okay. Alive? Well, yeah, he's young. Out to sea. To be free. We're going to keep our eye on him.

We're going to make sure that this truce thing happens, and then afterwards, there's a bit of an internal debate about whether we are going to go on a... on the trail of blood and redemption and justice, or if we are going to just simply turn a blind eye to all of the wrongs that have been committed in the last few years. Whoa. I feel like- Or somewhere in between, there was, at the end, there was sort of floated an idea that we would become an elite ninja force

that would go in and just very quietly kill those, or at least capture those who were responsible without causing any other ripples in the society. Ooh, I like being a task force. Let's be a task force. Who's idea was the ninja force? That was, yeah. Caleb's, I think it was Caleb.

Caleb, you're so smart, that sounds like so much fun. You have access to ninja training? I wonder, you know what, I could probably get some costumes made for us. I feel like both sides of that debate were a little more nuanced, but yeah, it's kind of. I think we clearly need to let off a little bit of steam. This has been a very long day.

Very long day. Vlas, did you believe him when you let him go? Yeah. Yeah. He seems like he has a lot to lose and a lot at stake. Could have had a better lie. Yeah. All right, that's good enough for me. I'm going to send a message to Essek.

Ooh. Okay. No, you don't need verbs or anything. You can just cut right through to the mouth. Your message was terrible. I find your message to be what? You understood what I said. Barely, it took a lot of thought. It's much better to just talk to them.

Just use vowels. Ow, ow, ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Hi, how are you feeling? Do you feel guilty, or are you happy? Are you just crying in your room right now? We're thinking about you.

A brief pause before the response comes. I am just contemplating what is to come. I appreciate what sliver of trust allowed me to leave. It's not forgotten. That's it. He said he's just sitting there,

thinking about you kissing him, Caleb. That's all. He said he's just sitting there, thinking about you kissing him, Caleb. That's all he said. He was just like, Caleb kissed me, Caleb kissed me. Sure, that checks out. No, it's not what he said. The reality is, we don't trust him, no. And redemption for him is a long shot at best, but. True.

I mean, you held a sword to my neck once upon a time. That's true. I'm not saying ignore what he's done there. He has a great many more footsteps to take if he indeed wishes to make up for what he has done. It's very unlikely. You'd have to earn it, one step at a time. One step at a time.

Yeah. Glide. One glide at a time. One glide, that's, wow, these really, you don't know, you can be just treading on under that shit, you don't know. Just to keep track of where he's going. Ticka-ticka-ticka-ticka-ticka-ticka.

Or he's just walking, but it's just the water. They would, they would. Maybe he does a lot of squats when nobody's around. When he's at home? Yeah. Maybe he's just taller and it's a little bigger. Air squats! Good one. And trust.

I didn't know you knew what that was. What? An air squat, because it's clear that you've never done one. What is an air squat? Oh, it's... I don't actually know. I was really invested in it. I don't know, maybe jump at the end?

I don't know. Okay, that would hurt. It's a jump squat. Also, truth be told, obviously we do not trust him, but we know more now than we did before and we can potentially use the man. Mm-hmm. That's true. Did it change your opinion of what we're supposed to do? Head out to sea or stay?

We head out to sea. Plan stays the same. If any justice is going to come from this, it's going to be a long game, and one that I don't think we want to act upon in the weeks before or after the trade. Not for a bit. They're all just looking for an excuse

to throw this piece out the window. Yeah, regardless, I mean, right now they are actually talking about peace? That's pretty wonderful. Sort of peace. Who knows? Tenuous peace. Truce. A truce. Greater effect, peace.

Peace on the outside. Yeah. Less people getting killed, peace. They're obviously using the situation, but maybe we can use them in return. Long game, like you say. Long game. When do they depart again? Is it imminent, or do we have a few? Couple days. Couple days.

Well, should we start thinking about any fortifications to the Ball Eater, or any sort of, I don't know, do we need to be prepared? Oh my gosh, are they going to bust out in a battle or something, is somebody lying? So many things could happen. Oh, man. We actually do have a fair amount of cannon on the ship.

I just don't know how much we could have without really reducing the speed. I think more than anything, it's going to be, we're going to be important to be there. We're all a lot to reckon with. Any one of us in a fray. In a fracas! Oh, in a fracas.

Yeah. Sorry, that party's got me amped. It was a pretty good party. Just doing the ringing of your mouth. How are you holding up, Beau? Oh, I'm great. That was awesome. You're going to feel a little weird in a couple days. Just nothing, just drink some juice. Try to lay off the ale a little bit and get some sleep if you're feeling a little low.

You'll be okay. Take an off day. Yeah, just take it easy. There you go. Everybody save your outfits, because you all look really wonderful, okay? Did you say save your outfits? Yeah, don't leave them here. Take them with us in case we want to dress up

some other time. Okay. If you prefer, I could, and I pull out that little piece of amber, I could store them in here for safekeeping so they do not get ruined. That's pretty cool. Isn't it obvious? No.

It holds things. Have you ever tried it? Yeah, yeah, of course, yeah. Amber of holding. How much can you put in there? A good bit. I could put you in it if you were dead. Oh, if we were dead. If I was dead. If we were alive.

Can I go in there now? Yes, but then you would be dead. Instantly, or would you have a couple seconds? Pretty quick. Would you suffocate? How does it work? Is it like a vacuum? Do you implode? Yeah, does it just crush your armies?

You go somewhere else and there is no air. Oh, you can open the ocean. Do it now, do it right now. Yeah. I mean, is it cold, is it hot? You go somewhere else and there is no air. Oh, you can open the ocean. Do it now, do it in the ocean, do it right now. Yeah, I mean, is it cold, is it hot? I think maybe stick to pit fights where you let yourself get whirled upon and maybe don't jump inside.

This is like Event Horizon, go through the port, you should come right back, you'll be fine. This is like Flatliners, it's not like Event Horizon. I know, both of those things ended up terribly for the people. Long jump. It's longer than you think. Longer than you think.

Do you have a piece of amber that holds stuff? Yeah. Yeah. That's great. I like to, you know, I like to. How do you get stuff out? You just stick your hand in it or something? Where would you? Do you have to cast a spell to banish it out again?

What do you call it? Do you call it Widogast's Plane? Is that what you call it? I call it Widogast, I just call it the Vault of Amber. That's Widogast's Vault of Amber. Widogast's Vault of Amber, that sounds really catchy. Yeah, that does sound catchy. W-V-O-A.

I mean, only if you were to put it into some sort of player's handbook or something. Something that would last forever and immortalize your name in the can forever? Let's not get ridiculous here. This is just off the map. Like you, Fjord, like you. You do have a very forward sense of branding, Caleb.

Yeah, I can see why that would be. Do I really? I am not using my actual name. You know what a great friend would do. Yeah, let's put it in your amber. I actually, I would love to see how things come in and out of it, just in case you're incapacitated. What if I put my finger in and out? You'd have four fingers.

It would just fall off. It would clamp into her finger and... I mean, there's only one way to find out. Does it have teeth? Her finger? You better believe they have teeth. Where are we? Let's go to sleep.

You guys are in the Chateau. I was waiting for you guys to finish up. He starts putting out the ring of stuff... But we're in our clothes now. What, are we all just going to get naked right now in the middle of the bar? She was curious. She wanted to lose a finger. I wouldn't mind.

I have a wonderful body now. I'm just going to take off my ascot. Show us how it works. Here's an ascot. An ascot? Oh, they're giving me the ascot. Yeah, okay. Just show us how it works. All right, so he puts out the five pieces of amber,

but it takes a while, so you strip naked, I guess, while I cast some mumbo jumbo, and it ascots and it's gone. How do you get it back? Oops. Oh, I thought that. Una. What did he say? Unagi. Uno.

And the ascot reappears. Una, una, una, una! Is that the only word for you? Is there anything else in there? No. Is it like saying, Citi? Does it open up if anybody says it? Hey, Citi. Hey, Citi.

You know, Caleb, what a great wizard would do would be to name new spells after all of his friends. You know, spread the love. I will take that into consideration. What about like a combo? If there's a waiting list, I'm at the top, sorry, go ahead. You know, like a joint combo, you know? Like pizza combo, or nachos, widow guests, nacho combos.

See Brandon. I would equip that every morning. Like, nach your combo. Okay, good night. Okay, good night. All right, you guys go to your respective rooms. You have your full rest for the night. There are two days before the Armada leaves. You guys can just leave early if you want, or you can leave with them, or you can accomplish anything in the are two days before the Armada leaves. You guys can just leave early if you want,

or you can leave with them, or you can accomplish anything in the next two days you want to here in Nicodranas before you head out. What would you like to do? I'm just going to go to the store, and I'm going to buy some party decorations and long strips of fabric, because I noticed at the party that we were at,

they had that fabric stuff draping everywhere. I thought that looked really cool, so I'm going to get some of that stuff going. Okay, okay. Probably, like, we already have a lot of clay. Maybe I'll make a lot of little figurines. Yeah, I'm going to buy some clay

so I can do some sculpting on the boat. All right. Yeah. I'll say, with all of those materials purchased, it'll run you... two and a half gold. Got it. I'm talking lots of stuff. I've got to make it for how many people, like 200 people?

Oh, this is for? Party favors. Okay, that's a lots of stuff. I'm going to make it for how many people, like 200 people? Oh, this is for? Party favors. Okay, that's a lot of people. Sorry, we'll put that at 25 gold. Like this. Okay. Um. Does anybody else want to do anything,

Nick and Anas, or anything before we? I'm spending two full days and nights with my family. Mm-hmm. That's it. All right, perfect. Anybody else? Yeah, I will go and visit Yussa at his tower. Mm-hmm. No, no, scratch that.

I will spend two days in our lodging tinkering with that collar. Okay, got it. And trying to ascertain what I might use to power it. Okay. That's previously discussed. Okay. Roll an arcana check. I will definitely, in those two days,

cast Fortune's Favor on myself. Natural 20 for a total of 30. Okay. You can ascertain that there is a particular kind of material that was utilized to power this device. Roll a history check as well. Ooh, a double. This is all taking place in two days?

This is over the period of time of like- Can I fortune favor myself over these on two days? Can you favor yourself? Actually, no, for this I'd say, because this is a momentary epiphany. You're the boss. History, you said? Yes. Total of 23.

Okay. You do recognize that whatever was used to power this, as well as possibly the golems within Halas's folding halls, that this material does not exist naturally. You don't know the name of it, but it was utilized as essentially an arcane battery-type technology that was employed by some of the top echelon

of archmages during the Age of Arcanum, you would know that some elements of it have supposedly been traded around, usually scavenged from ruins. What elements you've heard of coming from the north. From the north, and is this possibly connected to these cities floating in the sky? Possibly, yeah.

And you do know, it wasn't like every city was floating. There were maybe three major cities that themselves utilized and had to corner the market on Brumestone and were able to hold their entire city aloft. Who could afford to. Broomstone? Broomstone is the bluish stone

that's used in skyships and is a mineral that has the properties that, with a very basic, simple enchantment that it's very susceptible to, causes it to lift. And there are a few cities that had enough of this, that they had hoarded and built within that they were able to hold an entire city aloft. You know that supposedly one of these had

crashed in Eiselcross, to the north, in the Biting North, and there are some elements of the Empire outposts out there that are currently excavating what remnants they're able to have access to of that fallen empire. You would know it's referred to as Aeor. Aeor. Aeor.

Do you want this? I would later. Okay. We have too much to do. So I'd say between those two rolls, the only place you can think of that would probably have the materials that were utilized to power this, that's one location that you know

people have been able to scavenge and sell often. Eiselcross. Eiselcross. Okay. Okay, thank you. Cool. Done so. Anybody else wanting to do anything? I would spend those two nights changing my appearance and just hitting up any of the old haunts and bars

that I would visit in Nicodranas when I was on the Tidesbreath. The old ship, just to see if there are any familiar faces or particular persons of interest, just as a sort of means of reminiscing. Okay. No active conversations, but just more like passive melancholy and revisiting. Okay, cool.

Make a perception check for me. Come on, come on. 10. 10? Okay, the chaos around the wharf and the docks of the open quay, they are, it's pretty busy, and you have a hard time finding a comfortable location within some of these old haunts.

They are pretty busy, given the fact that the entire town is abuzz with people getting ready to travel, many from out of town. And so while these are familiar old haunts to you, for other people, there is a novelty to these spaces. A lot of the individuals probably never been to Nicodranas and have just come south with the Armada to be present to help defend this negotiation.

But you do manage to enjoy thinking back to some of the old life, reminiscing about some of the good and some of the bad, and just contemplating on who you are now and what the current path has for you. And throughout this entire venture, the one very visible structure that growing up was just a lighthouse

now has a much stronger significance as it is the massive stone lighthouse carved in the shape of the Wild Mother that overlooks the harbor. Right. What was once just a physical marker to get around the southern side of the city is now almost a welcoming beacon

to know exactly where you are. And that reminding you that you're always watched over. That's pretty cool. I'm going to spend some time finishing up and drawing some more of my tarot cards. I've listed a few that I would like to make. Okay. One, I want to be the Jewel and the Thief,

which is going to be a card with a big red ruby in the middle of it, letting out a lot of light, but in the shadow of the card, you can see there's actually a man behind it reaching and trying to grab it for himself. That's cool. The Spark and Blaze, so from one side, it's a small spark and on the other side, flipped over,

you can see it's like a flame that's consumed the entire bottom of the card. Okay, cool. Death and dawn, which will be a grave with a sun coming up from behind of it. And I think those are the ones I want to do right now. Okay, so you spend the time masterfully crafting and sketching and painting out your new tarot cards.

Yeah. Thank you. Fantastic. Anybody else have anything to do? Are there any fun activities to do at the Chateau? Any shows or anything? Sunday brunch. Sunday brunch. Ooh, brisket tacos.

Fuddleless mimosas. Marion is the central performer of the Chateau. Aside from that, there's less performances, more than there are occasional games, mild gambling, and in some cases, the occasional close-up magic performer might wander through and earn a little bit of coin on the off days. Some nice yoga.

That's the Chateau specifically. But throughout the city, there are all manner of performances, and there are musicians and dancers and a whole number of artists of all different kinds that go to the streets to busk and earn coin from those who are passing through, from those that live nearby.

Some that this is where they reside and make a living. Others are just making their way up and down the Menagerie Coast, jumping from city to city state, doing the best they can to make a splash and then leave before, you know, does Alezzo get any wind of maybe untoward activity. But there's a lot of culture here, you know? There's a reason that the city has its name.

And it's beautiful. And I guess for all the times you've been here, it's nice to almost take a little bit of time for yourself, just wander and experience. And it's interesting to be a town that is, you know, based in color and to be the monochromatic stranger from the East, but yet still smiling and enjoying it all.

Yeah. After walking through just alone, I want to just go find a beach somewhere at night and just go sit out by the water and play my bone harp and just have a nice self-care Sunday. Okay. Okay. Okay.

I dig it, I dig it. All righty. It's a beautiful night. The moon is only barely visible across the horizon by the time you get out there. There's a little bit of light dancing across the waves. The stars are out above you, and you're far enough away where you can see

the distant dotted glows of all the various points of lantern light throughout the entire city, but you feel peaceful and alone, comfortable, and in that moment, content as you begin to practice along your heart. Okay. Anybody else? I want to make a quick run to buy some magic supply,

magical supplies for a few of my weirder spells, just so I have some options. Okay. The two places that you had uncovered as possible sources, there's Meandering Treasures in the Restless Wharf, or there is the Seafloor's Bounty in the open. Kikwai. Kikwai!

Kikwai? I don't know. Which has the better vibe? Kikwai. Meandering Treasures definitely seems to be the larger and more prominent of the two. I'll support a small business. I'll go to the other one.

Okay. Thank you. All right. Grabbing some incense, stuff like that. No worries. Gold worth. So you enter the Seafloor's Bounty. It seems to be a general store of kinds,

but it specializes in pawning items and scavenged loot and things that a lot of travelers come through and want to offload, whether legal or not. The exterior itself looks similar to many of the other base wooden buildings, but it's been heavily decorated with dry, rotten nets that have been pulled across the corners of it with all sorts of hanging glass baubles.

You can see outside against the walls, there are strips of leather that are currently being tanned. There is a gathered group of five different, colorful, tropical birds that aren't in cages, but they're staying on perches outside. As you approach, they begin to make noise. Like, this garbled bird noise as you approach

and look over towards you. Hey, everything going all right? Doing okay? That's nice, that's good. Hold on, I've got, yeah, I pull out whatever the hell was growing in my pouch. I like your look. Yeah, I have something that says,

difference from far away. Yeah. I mean, come on, you either want it or you don't. Lands on your arm and just eats it out of your finger. I figured. Shits on your arm. Goes back to its perch. I don't clean it off. Okay. Ew. Come on, Ratagast.

We take it. Yeah, so you enter the interior. It smells so strong of medicinal herb and fish. Just a combination of the two. It smells so strong of medicinal herb and fish. Just a combination of the two. It's this odd, somewhat pungent, to most people, but to you, I don't say it would bother you too much. The inside, however, is pleasantly decorated. There are all manner of small pots

that contain segmented gardens and a lot of displaced herbalism, specifically built herb gardens that are dotted in the interior at different heights and different shelves that give part of the aroma that you encountered, and are probably, over time, part of what's harvested and utilized in different balms and salves

and stuff that are sold here. You can see there are clusters of fishing gear on one wall. You can see some long spears and fishing spears. You can see there's, looks to be like a flintlock pistol on one wall in the back. You can see there's one table that contains what looks like a bunch of tools and other odd objects

that have just enough rust and barnacles on them that you assume they were probably pulled from the seafloor and then sold here. It's an eclectic interior. You do see the one person who runs this place is a older female gnome, has this very deep-set smile lines on her face and these crow's feet that the lid itself

seems to almost completely cover the eyes, except for a little bit of a beady black that pokes through. Very, very suntanned skin. You can see it's been burned in places over and over again to the point where it gives her this very splotchy complexion that's strangely adorable. Her hair is sun bleached to where it, you can see the gray and light brown beneath,

but the entirety of the main surface itself is practically white and blonde from sun bleaching. As soon as you look around and then notice, she's just going to sit there with her hands covered and goes, hi! Hey, hi. How can I help you? I'm Caduceus.

I don't know if we've had the pleasure. I don't think we have. I'm Sheila Bobsnapper. It's a pleasure. And welcome to my establishment. I love it. I was hoping just to pick up some sundries. I'm looking for some incense, a little bit of that, I can't remember the name of it,

but that kind of saffron fat ointment that is used to make a true seeing tinctures. I do a little bit of my own, but I'll use a little bit of that. Let's have a look and see what we can do for it. Come on, come on. She hops off her stool and scuttles over to you. Yeah, those materials, you can go ahead

and purchase what is necessary. 100 each, and then if you've got anything else interesting, I'm always a collector of odds and ends, and just for fun, I'm going to cast Detect Magic in the room and see what I see, if anything's shiny. Okay, you... There are three things that catch your attention.

You see on one wall, there is what looks to be a leather fan of some kind that is just set on the edge. It's about maybe this long, and it's sprawled out openwards. It would look like a hand fan, but it's a little larger than the ones you've seen used as part of delicate, social, presentational type of design.

It has a beautiful design in the front that looks like a continuously curled series of lines, almost like snakes or serpents that are winding around each other, but without a head, just these long coiling lines, gray and they fade at the tips. running around each other, but without a head, just these long coiling lines, gray and they fade at the tips.

Tangled and weirdly beautiful, very watercolor-esque, but that definitely gives a glow. There is a case that you see that gives a faint magical aura from the inside of it. You can just barely sense from the interior. It has a heavy bronze lock on the outside that looks very intricately carved and detailed. There is a leather strap

around her neck that has a bundle of dried herbs or roots that are bound and held to this choker-like necklace. I'm going to ask an order. The fan's interesting. What do you know about that? Well, you see, that was sold to me not but seven or eight months ago by Gerald Kinzen. He's a fellow fisherman that comes over here

from Broken Bank occasionally and provides all sorts of strange findings and hasn't had any takers yet, but from what he tells me, it's got some magic in it. Wow, that's exciting. I'd be curious what you, well, I'm going to ask about a couple more things, but I would be curious about how much you'd be playing.

I can show you if you want. I mean, if you know what it does, sure. Takes it off the wall and goes, Let's step outside. Ooh. You step outside into the warm daylight, and she goes, Now, watch that barrel.

She points to a barrel across the street about 40 or so feet away from you. She opens the fan, goes, and suddenly, this wind gust just bursts from it, slams into the barrel, and you watch it, suddenly go, and then roll and roll and roll and roll. She closes it, snaps it shut. Oh wow, that's pretty cool.

200 gold. 200 gold, well, all right. Other questions? That's pretty cool. That's wow, wow. Is it just barrels or does it do other stuff, too? I haven't tried. Wow.

Barrels alone are pretty exciting. Does it work on people? I haven't tried. You want to? Only if you buy it. We'll talk. Okay. So you got the, then I pick up the case. This is exciting.

Now, that's the mystery case. Meaning, I haven't been able to get it open. So I don't know what's inside. But I'll sell it to you for 500 gold. Who knows? It could be ashes. It could be the lost jewels of an ancient ruler. Either way, that's pretty exciting.

Isn't it? Yeah. Isn't it? Wow. I mean, yeah, they're both pretty good. Oh man. I'll grab that. And then, not that it's for sale, but I was kind of curious, you have such an interesting thing you're wearing.

I assume it's not for sale. I was just sort of curious about it, though. This helps me kind of maintain a lot of my gardens in here. It allows me to converse with the creatures that grow from the earth. See what they need, when they need them. I can already do that.

They talk back and tell me what they require. Hmm. Hmm. I don't suppose to be interested in parting with that by any chance. Or making another one. I understand if you don't. What's your offer? Oh man, I don't know.

You got so much fun stuff. You want 500 gold for the box, 200 gold for the fan. Yeah. He wants 500 gold for the box, 200 gold for the fan. Yeah. How about 900 gold for the whole kid in Caboodle? Because I like your hair. Go ahead and make a persuasion check.

Ooh! Holy boy, holy boy. Can you guide yourself? That's a fair offer. I'm not going to guide myself, because I don't want to. Yeah. Well, actually, I'll do something before I do this. You like the hair. I do. I can sweeten the deal a little bit,

and I remove some of the pink phosphorescent mold that's growing on me that's part of the stuff that makes the hair grow, and I'll just place some of it on the counter. You can see if you can get it going. This is not natural. This is a choice. This is a thing I'd do.

Go ahead and roll your persuasion check. All right. Come on, baby. 12. 12? Well, the DC did decrease when you offered the lichen, so that helped. She goes, The pile of pink stuff?

900 gold and you have yourself a deal. Oh! Yeah! Well done! You bought magic shit! You did. Can't wait to come back again. This place is so nice. Anytime!

Maybe wait a few weeks. Oh, I'm going to be gone for a while. Don't worry about it. No worries, anytime! And do you buy, too, out of curiosity? Oh, always! If I see something fun, I'll bring it by. Please do.

Always looking to collect and find new owners for them. Pleasure. So yeah, you have? I mean, I knocked 900 gold off my... That's what gold is. Oh, he don't care. That's what gold is for. So here you go.

Yeah. All right, let's see. Okay, okay. It's just the two, right? Because you can't open the box yet? Yeah, you can't open the box yet. Can't open the box yet? It's got the embers in the box.

Oh man. If it's empty, you would have done it. That's what Matt and Marcia were talking about. Marcia would do anything. Oh man. So this makes it so they can talk back then. Yeah. Okay, that's pretty cool. And then I've got the weird box.

Okay, and where's my equipment? Let me knock 900 bucks off this. Worth it. Woo! Fantastic. I skip back home. Magic beans. Anything else? Magic beans. I actually read my mind.

Beau is going to take a bedroll and some food and shove it in a bag, and she's going to go walk up the coast a little bit, find a spot, and just camp overnight for the rest of her time. Okay. Have some alone time. You got it. On the last night before the Armada leaves,

you're out there camping, and you do hear the soft sound of, well, roll a performance check. Mm-hmm. Aw. Performance is minus two. Oh my god. Ten. Ten.

Not bad. You hear what at times falters, but is mostly a pleasant sound of a harp. Oh. Can I see where it's coming from? I'd say with your perception, with your past perception, yeah. So you lean forward and you can glance and just,

I mean, it weighs off, but you see a figure sitting just where the horizon and the ocean meets what looks to be a bit of a sand dune there along the beach. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You just nod and smile, watch from a distance. Cool. Yeah. All righty.

So the morning is imminent. As you come to consciousness and begin to prepare yourselves for the day, the energy is palpable across the city. You see countless righteous brand soldiers and shore wardens being aided by Zalezo in bringing final materials towards the harbor. You can see most ships are now out there

and arranged and ready to leave. The last few stragglers are being loaded up. You can see the final conversations are happening between the local lords and ladies and those that will be leading as part of this journey. It's going to happen soon. So what did you guys like to do? As we wake up, I'm going to grab my husband,

just have a private moment and just be like, hey, Yeza, let's talk. Of course, of course. Real quick. So I'm back now. I'm me. I'm my, we're a family again. It's pretty cool. It's pretty great, I'm not going to lie. Yeah, yeah.

But also, you've been living here in this sort of weird temporary space that is not our home, and at some point, Luke will have to start school, and what are we doing? I've been thinking about that. I don't know how long this was going to take. I'm not going to lie. Not going to lie,

living most of my life in Felderwin, you know, I was content. It's really nice here. Oh? Well, yeah, there's the ocean. Yeah. Right? Luke likes the ocean.

Well, okay. That's okay. I don't know, just like the culture here, the people, it's a very different experience, and I'm rather enjoying kind of the change of pace, so. Don't feel like it's a burden on either of us, necessarily. Don't you think we should get some sort of a permanent home, if you like it here, I like it here, too.

Well, I'm not saying we need to stay here forever, but I'm just saying, don't feel like it's been a burden, either. I mean, our home's in Felderwin. What remains of it, I suppose. But, yeah, I like it here for now. I am considering finding a tutor for Luke. Okay, well. Mainly because it's important for him to,

he's getting to that age now where I think he can start learning more than shooting that crossbow. Yes, no, he has to have, you know, education in other aspects of his life other than physical. We should definitely do that. In fact, maybe Marion knows some tutors,

the ones that helped raise Jester. That's true. That's very true. I'll go ahead and ask her. I think that I'm going to ask her. Oh, okay. But like, I don't know. Do we have a plan? Should we go back to Felderwin at some point

and, you know, just be a family? I mean, I'd like to, eventually. Well, I don't want you guys to just be sitting in limbo here waiting for me. We're not sitting in limbo, necessarily. Like I said, this has been an interesting change of pace. I think it's a great opportunity for Luke to see more of the world

and meet people of all different walks of life and, you know, kind of get away from the very, frankly, insular experience that Felderwin is a lot of the time. And, you know, you're doing some pretty big things. And the last thing I want to do is to get in the way of that.

It's true, I mean, my friends are counting on me to help them. We have a pretty important thing coming up. I would hate to abandon them right now, but I can't keep doing this forever and just leaving you guys after two days, coming up. I would hate to abandon them right now, but I can't keep doing this forever and just leaving you guys after two days, three days. I mean, it's not fair to you.

We're not going to do it forever, right? No, you're right. No, you're right, I'm not going to do it forever. But look what they did, they brought you back. They did. They saved you, all saved me from a very terrible experience. They helped keep our son safe.

I mean, I don't think I can ever find the words to express it, but I'm extremely grateful for everything that your friends have done and whatever they need help with. And that involving, you know, have done, and whatever they need help with. And that involving, you know, my better half helping as she does, then, I mean, what else can I ask for? You are like the greatest husband ever, by the way. Can I just say, like?

Well, we kind of shaped each other. But to that point, I'm enjoying the change of pace for now. I think Luc is. We have a small plan to try and continue life as it is while we're here. And I like not being under the thumb

of some odd Assemblywoman, so I'm okay with this. Okay, well. For now. I'll leave you enough money that if it feels weird that you're in this hotel place, that if you want to get an apartment or something, you can, you should.

Or if you like being here, that's fine, too. How much is real estate out here in Nicodranas? I passed an office last night. They had all these pictures of like, you can live here for, you know, they had some condos. Oh, oh. Timeshare, there was a time share thing. I've heard someone mention time share.

Yeah, I don't quite know how it works, but. They had free food, it was great. Oh yeah, I just did. For a very long time. Yeah, yeah. I mean, free food, though, right? Yeah, oh yeah. Well, if you see anything,

just let me know, because I've been collecting quite a bit of money. Well, if you need somewhere to keep it, I can act as the accountant, I guess, in this arrangement. Yeah, of course, of course. Here, I'll leave you... I'll leave you 100 platinum. You give it to him, he goes, Holy shit.

Teth. Well, you know, I shouldn't be carrying this with me. What if I lose it or something? What if I lose it? And he quickly puts it in his pocket and says, I have, wow. Yeah, go with your friends. I mean, it's crazy,

but do we make a lot of money? I think I could probably find a place, yeah. Wow. Okay, yeah, no, I'll get on that. Or not, I mean. But it's as incredible as this is, you know, don't get yourself in any situations that are too dangerous.

Ooh. You know what? I can't promise that, but I can promise you that my friends will do their best to protect me. Okay. There are a lot of tales of heroic sacrifices and poems spoken by different bards

and storytellers of these people who stood up to these great challenges and gave themselves for a better tomorrow. You're extremely brave. I want my life. I don't want a poem. Yeah. I promise I'll be more than just a story.

Okay. I'll come back. Okay. And this will, this will end at some point, and we'll go to Felderwin, we'll have a summer place here, and a winter place there, and yeah, we'll be like, We'll have a summer place here and a winter place there. And yeah, we'll be like, not bi-coastal, but you know, like, yeah. Like one of those hip couples that travels all the time.

Totally, yeah. Yeah. Maybe I'll get a tan. Ooh, you would look good with a tan. Think so? Yeah, you're very pasty. Yeah. But, you know, when you're tanning, just stay at least 25 feet from the water.

Shit. Okay. Okay. All right, I'll be back in a couple weeks, I think. Okay. We'll be here. Okay. We probably have like 10 minutes before I have to leave, so take off your pants.

Yes, ma'am. All right, the rest of you guys gather your stuff. Any last minute business, or are we heading to the docks? Let's go to the docks. Let's go! To the docks! Let's go to the docks. All righty. Let's go to the docks. To the docks. What'scks! Let's go to the docks. All righty. Let's go to the docks. To the docks. What's in the docks?

You make your way to the Ball Eater. Your crew is waiting for you. Smaller than usual, just because there's only so much room on the ship. So the four main crew that operate it, stay behind that, includes Marius and Orly, and I believe it's Gallon, and one other person you haven't met.

It is, yeah, Galen. And the rest of you all make your way up there. The sails are unfurled, the anchor is raised, and you join the outskirts of the armada as it begins to make its way out into the open waters of the Lucidian Ocean, heading southward to southeast. That's where we're going to take a break.

Yeah! That's a good break. To the sea! We'll be back here in just a few minutes, but in the meantime, we do have our one more giveaway. Tonight is the Pot of Cut tabletop tray. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Eat it back.

Delightful leather interior dice tray, beautiful orange color for one lucky winner there in the chat. Tonight's keyword is Sailing. Takes me way to where I'm going. No, we can't clear that. Sailing, the word is sailing.

Enter it once and only once in the chat. More than once, you'll be disqualified. And once again, only people in the U.S., pardon me, and Canada, excluding Quebec, will be back here shortly with a winner. We'll see you guys soon. We interrupt this Critical Role Podcast Network broadcast to bring you news of dangerous treasures

that lie sealed within the Critical Role shops. Only the heartiest of adventurers should dare seek them out. In all seriousness, though, I'm Matthew Mercer, and we've made some very cool things that we really like and hope you will, too. If you'd like to support the show, please consider visiting any of our Critical Role online shops through the shop tab at critrole.com and see if anything catches your eye. Okay, back to the show. And welcome back.

So, before we go ahead and get into the game, we do have our Wyrmwood winner. Wyrmwood winner for tonight is Fam the Wizard. Fam the Wizard. Fam the Wizard, congratulations. Fam the Wizard. Fam the Wizard. Congratulations to you, Fam the Wizard.

We'll have that boxed out to you ASAP. All righty, so. The Mighty Nein, heading off to sea. Oh gosh! For a many days journey. It's about, looking at the detailed elements, about 395 miles around the southern edge of the Ashkeeper Peaks, avoiding the Ink Claw Reef, but will be to the south, and into the open waters

of the designated meeting location within the Lucidian Ocean. The armada moves at the speed of its slowest ship, as one piece. Is that us? In optimal weather, travel is set to be between nine to 11 days. Oh shit. Nine to 11 months? Days. Oh.

Okay. I'm sure it will be more. So. Plenty of time on ship. Get to meet your old crew. Orly is happy to helm as navigator, but you guys can go back to whatever positions you want to, or you can return to the previous positions

that you had worked and trained as. That includes you as the captain, Beauregard as the first mate or cooper, Caduceus as the bosun, Jester as the carpenter. Of course I am. Veth as the First Mate or Cooper, Caduceus as the bosun, Jester as the carpenter. Of course I am. Veth as the powder monkey. Yep, that's me.

And Caleb as the navigator, but you also have Orly able to helm navigation if you don't want to have to worry about that. Or you can have Marius help as a bosun as well, and Galen is trained as a carpenter as well. Galen with his axe and scythe. And who's the new kid? That's right.

Yeah. Oh no. The new kid? Yeah, who's the new kid? Oh, right, yeah, and there was a fourth person who was New, fish. Yeah. Shelda is her name. Shelda. Yeah.

And she is a half-elf, young punk-looking kid, maybe no more than 19 or so. Looks scrappy, probably came from a relatively impoverished upbringing, and is definitely in shades of young Beauregard looking to prove themself out at sea. How old is Shelda?

Shelda, you're not sure, but looks to be late teens, early 20s. I go up to her. Okay, you see her with her jet black hair itself that's short in the back and this big, long, curled mess in the front that covers part of the face a bit as it plumes forward. That's cool.

Looks at you with the one immediately visible eye, the other one obscured between the rest of the hair in front, and goes, Can I help you? Sup? Sup? How you doing? Doing all right.

You like working with these people? I've only been with them for a few weeks. They hired me while we were waiting. This guy's giving you a hard time? Not yet. Why, should they? Nah, just checking. I mean, I kind of wouldn't care either way.

So. It's your ship, right? Yeah. Well, mine and my crew's, Mighty Nein. I'm technically the first mate. Well, first mate. Yeah. It's a pleasure.

Yeah. Cool, just wanted to make my acquaintance, and I walk away. Okay. Wanted to make my acquaintance? Yep. Move, move, X-Lock. Yeah, cool. Cool.

I'm sure she thinks you're really cool. Oh man. Do you know what TikTok videos are? And so? Oh, I thought of something. Hmm? I got you something. What? I picked up something in town. I've been waiting for it there.

Oh. So, Hambo the fan. Now, do you know what this is? I have an idea. It's a fan. It is a fan. Yeah. So, can only use it, try to use it only once a day. Be, be, be, be, you know, be careful with it now.

Just hold it and... Just fan yourself. I wouldn't fan. Well. Pfft. Finish that. I clack it. Vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv Ah! Ah! Woof! You just see a spray of feathers as it into the water. Would it do that much? It's Gust of Wind. Gust of Wind is, I believe, a second level spell.

Oh no. I'm so pissed at you. Yeah. A line of strong wind, 60 feet long and 10 feet wide, blasts from you in a direction you choose for the spell's duration for one minute. So right now it's like. Oh, it's just going?

It's just going. Oh god. Put it up to the sails. Wow, you know what I'm saying. Each creature in the line has to succeed on a saving throw or be pushed 15 feet away from you every round. It disperses gas or vapor,

extinguishes candles, torches, similar types of flames in the area. It doesn't do any real damage, but to a creature that is made mostly of feathers, it didn't kill it, but you see it splash in the water and it's still in the water like a chicken. Caduceus, can you help it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, hold on.

Yeah. 99 does not like animals. This is pretty cool, though. I turn to the sails. Do it again. Okay. So as a bonus action, you can change the direction of it. Oh, I can? Yeah. Oh! So you turn, because once you do it, it just creates it

for concentration a minute in that direction. Then as a bonus action, each turn you can shift the direction of it. Okay, I take the fan and I use it to guide the stream. Okay. The sail picks up even heavier and for the next minute that it lasts, there's a little bit of a burst of speed to it,

I guess you could say, from a physics standpoint. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, sure. I will keep, I have to keep. Only because of the moon. Yeah, would it be stationary or would it be relative to the boat location? I would say it's relative to the boat location.

Okay. Yeah, try, it can be used more than once, but try to only use it once a day because it'll fall apart, it's very delicate. It's pretty rickety. I did cast a healing spell on that poor bird. Okay. Oh man, that was more than I expected.

Yeah, there was a peer from outside of its... Sorry, that was really unintentional. Yeah, that's fair. No, that's, wow, really? Rude. Thanks, Caduceus. Should I owe you any money for this? No, no, no.

You sure? Of course not. Yeah. How awesome do I look with it? It's really pretty cool. I feel like it really completes the whole ensemble. Pull out my staff, too. Yeah, there it is. Yeah, that's good. Pull out the staff, too.

Now smoke a pipe as well. Orly! Hold a pipe up to me. I'm going to draw it. Stomps off. Ooh, and I put my leg up on a cask. Just like Captain Morgan. Comes back five minutes later with a little tobacco box

and sets it up, opens it, takes some tobacco and puts it in this long wooden pipe with this thin stem at the end. Yeah, arms are hurting. Yeah! Stay like that for like 30 minutes. I want to get this really detailed. Commemorate the moment.

Actually, uh. Oh, Test Tooth is calling us! Caleb. Oh, come on, come on, come on. Hold on, Captain! What are you doing? She's missing a portrait! Test Tooth! Don't tell her about this.

You are supposed to be an example to the crew in my absence. What is this? An example. This is a glowing example. Look at, this is dope! Glowing? I cast Dancing Lights around Beauregard. I add that to the drawing.

It's pretty epic. Beth, Caleb, I picked this up in town, too, I have that for the drawing. Remarkable. Beth, Caleb, I picked this up in town, too. Maybe between the two of you, you can figure out. What is it? I don't know, it's a locked box. Might be trapped, might be weird, I don't know. I don't know when I open these and I... Check for traps.

Okay, checking for traps. Investigation check. D4. Keep holding it. Plusigation check. D4. Keep holding it. Plus a D4, okay. Investigation? Yes. 25. 25.

It is not trapped. I don't know. It's good. Just set it on the ground for a moment. I drop it. Oh. Straight through. Distant shot of the ship. Just a whole Akira shot.

I will spend 10 minutes on Ritually Cast Detect Magic on it. Okay. So you guys wait patiently while you're finishing your artwork. Right. Yeah. Yeah.

It's like a... Orly starts playing his bagpipes. It's a run shot! Knock on. while you're finishing your artwork. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Orly starts playing his bagpipes. It's our ensemble! Knock on. Just keeping the whole ensemble. We're on a tight ship here, Tusketeers! We got painting!

We got the stuff. Very rusty. How are we doing with the rest of the Armada? Are we actually speeding up? Well, for that brief instant, you sped up a little bit, but your keep was... Of course I'm here to either, actually. I thought I was going to. Yeah, I don't, I only would know.

Your instinct was right. Yeah, it wouldn't have made much of a difference. Yeah. Yes! How does our ship do, minus the fan, with the rest of the armada? Half, like, kind of average, or? About average. I mean, the slowest ship is just the standard sailing ship,

which can go about 48 miles in a day. So that's kind's the pace everyone's moving together. But the slower ships can go, the ones that are heavier can go even slower there, so you're moving about, I'd say, 30 to 35 miles a day. That's the blue heavens sort of out towards the peak or in the middle or bring it? The blue heavens in the center of it.

And a few ships adjacent to it is the Wind of Aeons. Got it. Just going to keep an eye on those. Understood. You finish casting Detect Magic, and there is a magical aura from the inside. Is it abjuration? For this, it would be...

Hold on just a second. It's two small sources. One is faintly conjuration. Faintly conjuration. The other is transmutation. Okay. Okay, I don't know. Should I pick the lock?

Should we dispel some magic? Why don't we all? Yashi can, wait, does your sword still dispel magic? Or does that not? it does do that? Yeah, but I'm not, I have my other one right now. Oh. Could switch them out. Could also be a good chance of destroying the box, though. Yeah.

How much do you spend on this? I don't remember. Could you do it from a bit back? Sure, yeah. I think everybody should get away from it while Veth does her thing. Sure. Okay. So we'll make a nice wide ring around the box.

All righty. Tusktooth, should I not do this on the ship? I mean, is this okay? Do I have, Captain, permission to pick the lock? Excellent. Permission granted. Aye aye! All right. He's gone mad with power.

I'll put it right at the front of the ship where the, I guess, I presume the lady is at the front of the ship. Do we have one of those? Yeah, we do. Okay, cool. There you go. I'm right on top of her, and I'll cast Mage Hand, and I will pick the lock. Go for it.

D4. Do you get the advantage? Do we give you advantage on it? No. Technically, I can reroll that, but I'm not going to. You have to! No, do it, you do! You have to.

I don't have to. It's the rule. The rule is I can. The rule is you can. Wow. Come on. So I know the rule. Addicted to story. What is this? Sleight of hand? Don't worry, I've got reliable talent. But you still rolled a one.

I did. But it becomes a 10 because of reliable talent. I know. That's up to the DM to rule, but it's, so it's, do I also add the plus four, or the two four? So it's 26 on a natural one. Don't worry, husband, I'll be right back. What? Oh my god.

The rogue is going to eventually build a called Reliable Talent, where they technically can't roll lower than a 10. Although on campaign one, I was always, I was just taking the ones when they came. I don't know why. It led to a walk of shame. Oh, that's amazing.

Well, given certain circumstances. That was the best. You got to let a one go. Reliable talent is when you're intending to succeed. Yeah. That's enough. Carefully, you watch the box teeter and almost with some of the wind that blows through it

gets to teeter off to the side, about to fall into the water and you're like, ah, you catch it, bring it back, and ever so carefully, and the top lid opens up slightly as the lock itself opens and sticks out slightly. Bring it over, what does it do? I will bring it over and I will present it to everyone. All right, you look on the inside,

there are some faint, I want to say it's dirt or ash, that's in the inside, almost like an element of packing what was inside, but rolled up tightly, it looks like it's a piece of paper or some sort of parchment. About a foot long. A foot long? Someone was here already.

Someone ordered a sandwich. It's an IOU for what was in there? Yeah. Should I pick it up and read it? Yeah, read it, yeah, read it. Do you want to read it? Because you bought it. I'm bad at public reading, that's just fine. You should go to Toastmasters.

What does it say? There are two scrolls in there that contain two different arcane spells. Whoa! Cool. One of which is the second level spell Flaming Sphere. Ooh. The second one of which is Telekinesis.

Whoa! Single-use scrolls? Motherfucker. Telekinesis? If he puts them in his book, it's a lot of used scrolls, right? Yeah. Well, I know one of those, so.

Which one do you know? I have a Flaming Sphere in my repertoire. Do you want a fire sphere? Here, you take it. I don't need a fire sphere. Who can use that, only Veth and I, or could the clerics use it? Once you gain a level, then you can,

there are some points where you can choose spells from other classes, you could take that one. But I mean, I can use it as a single use. Oh, as a single use, you could, yeah. Yeah, that's what I like. We couldn't use that as a single use. Yeah, can anybody? I don't think so.

Gracious, gracious. Here's your delicatesseness. Here's a flaming sphere. Thank you. Spend it all in one place. Goodbye. That was very kind of you. No, I mean, what else are you going to do with money?

Goodbye. Goodbye. Tuk tuk. Learn. If the spell's on your class's spell list, so not everybody. Yeah, we couldn't make it. I don't think you have any. No, I don't.

So technically you could, because it is something you could pull. I would allow it, given the fact that it is false on your initial list, because at certain points you can choose from any other class. I'll say, since this is one you scroll, I'd allow you to use it. Okay. Since you are one who's also learning from Caleb

as you go along. Great. Yeah. Cool. Good purchase. Well, once we get back to civilization and I can buy some high quality paper and ink, I will be able to use that special. All right. I love it so much.

Ah! So, we'll just continue here. Mm-hmm. Day one, day two. If there's anything you want to do during this trip, as I progress through the days, jump in. What's the weather looking? First couple days, clear, open, blue skies, dotted bits of white cloud,

but very minimal and isolated. Otherwise, it's perfect sailing weather. Nice and warm. The occasional ocean spray giving a cool balance to that. Yeah. Make a pillow fort in the crow's nest. I spend a lot of time carving little figures

of the Traveler. Okay. Cool. So many, so many little figurines of the Traveler. Okay. Cool. So many, so many little figurines of The Traveler. I'm really tired of making figurines of The Traveler. Fair enough. Day three comes with a heavier kind of marine layer fog

that hangs over a good part of the day, burns off slightly as the afternoon kicks in, but still, the clouds are a little more there. I go over to Jester. It's a lot of figures. Yeah. I figure everybody should get one when they come to the Calm.

It's pretty good. Yeah. My mom, whenever she hosts parties, everybody gets to go home with something, so I figure it would be nice. You know, some of them is this jeweler's kit. I think it has some leftover stuff. Just had this thing. I don't know, maybe we can make a few that are necklaces

or fancy ones for the high-ranking members. Oh my gosh. We can use some of the leftover jewel dust and sprinkle it on some of them, make them real sparkly. Yeah, that's dope. That's really awesome. That is such a good idea. I sit down and I help Jester make some fancy ones

and put some on chains. Okay, so day three, you're helping Jester with crafts. We're craft. Fair enough. The best part of D&D was the absence of glitter in that world, and you've now ruined that. Oh yeah, it's like the jam dust, you can't get it off, it will always be there. Yeah. Goddamn it.

It's like something got in my eye, and now it looks like a kaleidoscope everywhere I look. About 10 years down the road, you're just going to have this terrible, terrible growth. Yeah. So this is going to be a number of days at sea, so if there's anything you want to accomplish, any conversations you want to have, any check-ins, anything, this is going to be a number of days at sea. So if there's anything you want to accomplish, any conversations you want to have,

any check-ins, anything, this is, you guys are a captive audience here on this boat as you're watching the Armada. So is there anything you want to keep an eye out for? If there's anything you want to discuss? Day four comes around. I make sure Sprinkle's doing good. Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh wow, I forgot. Yeah. Sprinkle didn't have a good time on the ocean before, so I'm just checking every once in a while, make sure. Keep your mind to yourself. Make sure Sprinkle's okay. Very mean. Keeping an eye out. Oh, look, a plant!

Sprinkle is much happier since having the bath that was last given. Very unhappy being so clean at the time, because there is an element of natural oils and stuff that keep to it, but seems to be having a better time on the sea this time than the previous journey, wide and large. Fourth day, cloud cover takes the entire day.

The marine layer brings with it some actual clouds. Nothing rainworthy, but at least the blue skies for this day have faded. Yasha. Yeah. Can you still sense the weather and shit? I mean, I never really could sense the weather. I think I would just kind of,

I feel like the rain and lightning would sometimes find me, but I don't, you know. Is this your fault? Did you do this? I don't think so. Huh. But it's very possible. Last time we were on this boat,

you fought an invisible storm monster, and we all just watched, and it was real crazy. Yeah, that was a little crazy. I still don't know if we really have gotten that full side of the story. Do you know what that was? Yeah, well, I mean... Forgot to throw it out. It's like a lightning beast.

It was a lightning beast, but I think it was... Very, very frightening. It was a lightning beast, but I think it was... Very, very frightening. It was very frightening, but I think it was sort of a lesson for me from Stormborn. Do you think he's going to teach you any more lessons? Is this like an ongoing course,

or do you think now that you're free from Obann that you've broken away? Yeah, are you talking to him more and stuff now? I mean, not really. I guess I should. I feel like you were so close with talking with the Traveler, but I don't know if I want to be that close.

Well, now we know why I am so close, you know. Yeah. Yeah. How are you feeling about that? That's a good question. Can I be honest? Yeah, we're just crafting. It's the perfect time to be honest. That's true.

Yasha, do you want to craft? We're making necklaces. Yeah, okay. Come on, sit down, sit down. Just smush the clay. I don't know how I feel about it. You know, like at first, I don't know, I guess I felt a little...

betrayed, if that's the right word. You know? I spent a long time thinking he was a god and he never told me otherwise. I mean, but at the end of the day, he's been one of my best friends. He got me through a lot of really terrible times, and you know, if this is what he needs now, then

then I'll help him. That's very nice of you. Yeah. I feel like I would have a very different reaction. Yeah, same. We're very protective of you. Yeah. And defensive.

You know, so. If we ever come across as assholes, it's only out of love. Well, I know that. Hey, you know, I mean, and I know you think he might be a little strange, I see the way you talk to him, but he, you know, he gives me really good powers, you know?

It's not like I'm just like worshiping this guy and he's just like, yeah. He's like, okay, yeah, here's a whole bunch of really cool spells. So he, yeah, but as to what you were saying, I feel like a lot of that power is in you. I mean, how much of that is he actually giving you? I mean, don't you already just have it?

I don't. I don't know how that works. I don't remember. I don't remember being able to do anything fun like that before I met him, but to be honest, I never really tried. Yeah, maybe he just showed you the path. Maybe, but isn't that enough?

If he woke it up in me, then... Yeah. I think it's nice to acknowledge it, but give yourself some credit, too, for the accomplishments that you've made completely on your own. That's right, I did design some really good clothes. Well, that wasn't on my own, that was with Caduceus.

He is really stylish. Yeah. Thank you for my suit. That was great. That suit was pretty cool. Thank you for the dress, I really liked it. The slit was very high, but... It looked great. You got really good legs, Yasha.

I just wanted to show them off. Oh, thanks. Well, I mean, it helped with moving around, you know? Yeah, plus, I mean, too, in my defense, I underestimated your height, so I was thinking the slit would be a little lower on you. I know what you're saying. Yeah, because it did go all the way up here. It's fine. It's a good thing

you don't wear underwear. Yeah, no, did go all the way up here. It's fine. It's a good thing you don't wear underwear. Yeah, no, I know, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Fire! No, no, no. Ready? No! I take a little bite of the clay. Oh, that's not, it's not probably not very tasty. Yeah, but I heard sometimes it tastes a little bite of the clay. Oh, that's not, it's not probably very tasty.

Yeah, but I heard sometimes it tastes like a little salty. Yeah, but it tastes like, is it good? Yeah, it's like, yeah, it's a little salty, you know? Like mug, did you ever try it? I tried it before her. I tried it. Let's see everything. No! Tastes like...

I do feel like I was like my, you know, we've been on the ocean feel like I was, you know, we've been on the ocean, so my electrolytes are a little depleted, that's kind of nice. I don't like it. I don't like it that... You can spit it out. This will be a very special one. Whoever gets this one.

What about you, Yasha? What about me? Deflection, deflection, deflection. I don't like talking about myself very much, but. No, but really, okay, so before we left, Caleb mentioned a thing, like he made a joke of it, of you in the pit, but it's not really a joke, is it?

I mean, I thought maybe I would feel better after that, but it didn't really help. I think it was only satisfying for a very brief moment. And I guess maybe I thought that... Maybe I should... I don't know, that's a little dark, but... You should what? I think because I'm...

I don't know. I guess I thought maybe I should just die for every person that I've killed or something. But that's obviously not going to help anything. It won't, because... You know, think of all the good you're going to be able to do now. If you died, it would just end with the bad.

Yeah. Well, you guys are very wonderful and have made me feel a lot better about the choices that I've made and some of the choices that I have not made. It must be a weird experience. A lot of people, you know, kind of like the issue with Essek, he consciously made a lot of those choices.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's not you. There is a big difference. Yeah. I think so, but still, it's a hard thing to try to forgive yourself for. And I hurt you pretty bad. That makes me feel very, very terrible.

Oh, that... Don't worry about it. Plus, her scars look pretty cool. Yeah, it just adds to my aesthetic. It's great. It makes me a little bit more interesting of a person. I mean, you're already very, very interesting. You're both very interesting.

Like, you know? What do you think will help make you feel better? Do you know? I don't know yet. I mean, I think just being around you guys has been a help in itself. But I guess I'll find that out. I mean, I've seen so many things

that I never thought I would see. Like the ocean? Yeah. I've really missed it. I'm not going to lie. I really like being on the boat. Maybe when everything's done, you can be a pirate for real.

Or, you know, an actual ship captain. But a spy pirate? How awesome is that? A spy pirate is pretty cool. Yeah. I can still work with the Cobalt Reserve, but... On the city? Yeah, an international waters branch.

Ooh! Yeah, that'd be pretty cool. Yeah. I think this one's going to be mine. Oh. That's really big, Beau. I deliberately made it huge. You're going to be almost the highest priestess.

Oh, is it based on, oh. I mean, I'm not going to have, mine's just going to be real sparkly. I'm working on it. Because I don't want to inflate my position if the bigger means, like. We're all going to be super high priests and priestesses. This is becoming such a performance.

It's fun. Not exactly sure what we're doing yet, but it'll present itself on the day, yeah. Wait, Nott? Hi! Veth. Veth! Oh. I'm sorry, it's habit. Yep, no, that's fair.

It'll take me a while, too. I, do you, do you know how to swim? Uh, no. Oh, we need to fix that. Nope. No, we don't need to. I gave her, like, one lesson once, and she, like, never came back to do it again.

Maybe you'll do better. Do you know how to swim? Yeah. Where did you learn? Yeah, how did you learn how to swim? There's, you know, some bodies of water out there, you know, we would have to bathe and things like that and, you know,

not super deep or anything like that, but I know how to float. I know how to get from one side to the other. And I could teach you. You know different strokes? I know different strokes for different folks, yeah. What you talking about? I mean, when would I need to know that, though? I mean, why would I need to know that, though?

I mean, why would I need to know that? What if we get in a big pirate battle and our ship sinks and then we're in the ocean? And walk on water. What if your ring falls off? What if your hand explodes off? Ah! It could happen.

I almost lost both my hands. So. Yeah. It could happen. I almost lost both my hands. So. Well, I guess if we dock somewhere, you could teach me a lesson. Okay. I guess I wouldn't mind learning. Yeah, I think it would be really good for you to know how to swim, just in case.

Fjord, would you? Fjord, I'm sorry, Captain. Captain Dusttooth? Yes? Powder Monkey Veth here. If I were to do a swimming lesson, would you control the water around me and make it so that I can't drown?

Absolutely not, it's sink or swim, but what I would do is allow you to breathe underwater just in case things weren't going your way. No. What do you mean, no? How are you going to learn if you have help? You have to learn how to do it yourself. But at least, you know, it will teach her how to move in the water.

There's a fair difference between, you know, well, I mean, you know, at port is not so bad, actually. I mean, are we throwing her out on a rope behind the ship? No! While we're moving? Is that what you want to do? I think that's a great idea. I was just coming by, did someone say they needed rope? I've got so much rope.

Are we doing something? No, we're not doing that. Oh, I'm going to go back to playing with the needed rope? I've got so much rope. Are we doing something? No, we're not doing that. Oh, I'm going to go back to playing with the wheel. I actually agree with you on that. Oh wait, Caduceus. All right, rope. I'm going to help you make some tea.

Okay. Caleb! Mm? Were you napping? No, I'm standing three feet away from you. Do you want some tea? Of course I want some tea, thank you. Monica, help Caduceus make tea. All righty.

We'll table the swim lessons for now. Yeah. Yeah. This has been the weirdest metaphor for learning how to drive stick shift I've ever sat through. You never know. I walk over to where the captain is. All right. Captain.

What is your position on this ship? What are you? I'm the navigator. Navigator. Oh, that's right. You know where the fuck you are at all times. Yes. What is this part of the ship called again? I have my memory back. Where are we? At the front. Yes, this is this part of the ship called again? My memory's not right. Where are we?

At the front. Yes, this is the bow. The bow. Good to know, good to know. Is that right? I think that's right. That is correct. You know, despite your- The bow of a ship headed for a new land.

Despite your actor' nervousness about shipping terms right now, I can't help but notice that you seem more at ease out here. A little bit. Yeah? Yeah. I mean, it helps that you all know a little bit more. I don't quite feel the pressure to pretend

like I know everything, because I don't, and we've all leaned on each other rather well, so yeah. You are very different than when I first met you. Accent aside. That's fair, that's fair. It's curious to me because, you know, we are sailing off to something very intense,

and Beauregard and I and Veth have very personal stakes in this, and Caduceus is here because he sees some sort of grand plan in everything we do. Jester is like the glue of this group of weirdos that we are. And Yasha, I have never met anyone

who craved a family so much. But you... You know, I brought up the other day that sword you held up to my neck. That seems so long ago. I was very untrustworthy. I am very untrustworthy. That seems so long ago. I was very untrustworthy. I am very untrustworthy.

You were founded in your actions that day, but you were far more, you were darker then, and this new place you're in, I know you're still finding your footing, but it is admirable what you're doing. You're here, out in the middle of nowhere, trying to help broke a peace between two countries,

neither of which you are from. And we'd like to think of Caduceus as the only, as the most selfless in our party. But you're no slouch yourself. Thank you, that means a lot. I realize darker is probably a very apt term. I would probably call it more full of it. That sword and everything that came with it

was really the first sense of control I've had in my life, or the ability to control others, or even just affect a situation. And I think with a little bit of reflection, I'm starting to realize that maybe I thought that the way to enforce or shepherd others was through darkness or force or threats. Yeah.

Control is a tempting thing. Yeah. It didn't feel good. I stopped you in that moment, and then I felt terrible. I didn't know if that meant that control meant feeling terrible all the time, or if there was something wrong with the way that that exchange went.

And that and a million other things led to me realizing I don't have to do things that way. I don't have to do things in the way that were done to me. I understand you. Of course you do. Of course you do. I don't know if I'm more comfortable, if maybe I just care a bit less,

and I think that's the better place for me to be. I don't know if I'll ever be comfortable with any of this, but small things help. Watching over you and Rexxentrum, making sure that Jester can do whatever she needs to do with this entity. Watching Beau go back to her family, watching Yasha come back, watching Veth.

This is more life than I ever thought I would see. Every day is like a new page in what I thought was going to be a terribly boring and repetitive book, and it's not. So, yeah. You know, these people that we are dealing with, my people, they are good people in the Empire, but

these are not them. They are dangerous. And you are selflessly putting yourself in a very dangerous spot for very bad people. I... I was one of them, Fjord. He sort of grips the railing of the ship I was one of them, Fjord. He grips the railing of the ship and looks to see where everybody else is,

particularly Jester, and when he realizes that they're well enough away, Long time ago, you asked me about myself, and I just never answered. I value this family, Fjord, because I killed my own. For these people that we are going to deal with, you understand me?

My own. And I'm ruined. But I take comfort in the fact that I have a chance I'm ruined. But I take comfort in the fact that I have a chance to do something to make up for it. And I am very grateful for these people. And you, you're a good friend. And I felt like that needed to be said out loud. I'm glad you're here.

I admit I can't even begin to fathom what your experience in all this must be like. I never knew my family, and whatever story I tell myself about them in no way compares to what I know you have gone through. I know that. You are a good friend. I know you've done terrible things, but I see a good man. I do.

It's part of the reason I decided to just try and be one myself and not someone else. You and I have very similar journeys and vastly different backgrounds. These people, your people, have we even scratched the surface of what they can do? I really don't think so. What are they waiting for?

A moment where they can ascend. Do you think they mean to empower the Empire, raise it above the Dynasty, or is there a chance that they are trying to do more? It is definitely to raise the power of the Empire, for they are the Empire. But my teacher, they serve a king,

but they serve themselves. They always have. They will do anything to maintain and improve their position. They certainly don't seem to be the tightest of groups. Seems to be some small fracturing. No, and even one or two in the pack who are... fine. The two in the pack who are... fine.

But the martinet is dangerous. Ikithon is dangerous. So are my old friends. You know, in my town, when a terrible storm would come in, it wasn't because you could see it or feel it. Sometimes it was just noticing the animals around you starting to act differently. I keep an eye on you when we're around these people. I have no idea what they're capable of

or what the signs are. If your eyes are on them, our eyes are on you. I have no idea what they're capable of or what the signs are. If your eyes are on them, our eyes are on you. I will try not to let you down. We're behind you. Do you remember when we almost sank our own ship? Which time? Good point.

Caleb, T, Fjord, T. What? There you go. I didn't ask you. We just made a bunch. Don't worry about it. Like civilized people. What is that smell? Ask Caduceus. Oh, I will. Saffron and mushroom wine. That's lovely.

Saffron and mushroom. Is this made from anyone you knew? No, I can definitely, I mean, not personally, no. I mean, definitely somebody that I buried, I mean, that's what I carry, but I didn't actually know they came dead to the temple. Good. Dead people taste so good. I think so. Yeah.

Tea? No, yes, more, please. Day three goes on. Uneventful at sea, comparatively. Though the gray skies are comforting, as they remind you of the better times growing up in the Empire. Day four comes in, sky is still gray.

To the east, a cold wind begins to pick up, and it looks to be a storm coming. Nothing too heavy, but it looks like rain is probably imminent. Captain. Yes? It appears the storms are coming. Why does your voice change every time we're on this ship?

I'm assertive. You just, Veth is doing it, too. No. She's talking weird. She's really not. She's just very gung-ho about her job. She's very excited. I'm gung-ho about my job as your first mate. Yeah, no, I get it.

What was your, were you kind of? Storms of Bruin, Catelyn! Off the coast of Maine. No, I can see that. Any recommendations, first mate? Well, as they say, red sky at night, it is a sailor's delight. Gray out.

In a gray sky in the morning is a sailor's warning. That's what I read in a book. I don't know if that's true, but it's pretty fucking good. Yeah. That's true. Yes. I'd say that's all I have to report.

Great, make ready to ship for Inquiment Well. Orly comes over. Orly. Yes, Orly, ah. Looks like we are coming up on the Inklar Reef. Going to keep north of it on the Inklaa Reef. Going to keep north of it so we don't get dragged under.

I do better. Inklaa Reef south, please. Aye, captain. Yes, no, yep. Continue your course, yep. Fucking, oh, there it is. Oh, shit, down there. Is it in A? Do we know where we're going? Inklaa. No, you're. Yep. Oh, there it is. Oh, she's down there. Is it with an A? Do we know where we're going?

Inklaw. No, you're following the armada, which knows largely where it's going. Trying to start. I feel like we were supposed to get off the last overpass. We're heading south. Yeah, you guys are heading south-southeast.

Inklaw Reef is actually around Uruk-Hazel, the island where the serpent folk were. But you guys are skirting north past the reef and heading in that direction. The armada itself is arranging course appropriately. You could also see the ships are taking a little more of a separation in preparation for the coming storm

in case the waves get choppy. You don't want the ships too close together and smashing into each other. But yeah. Orly, I have to ready the ship for problematic weather. What do I do? Don't tell the captain.

Oh. Maybe it's best we get you together with Marius. I'll show you around. I'm going to work with Marius? That guy sucks. All right. Beau? What? Take shoulder with you.

Ah. Yes, Captain. Where's that voice? Yes, captain! All right. Preparing the ship for the storm, getting the sails ready, patting down the hatches. Hatches patting. That's one sore to say.

Yeah. But the evening comes, the rain does begin to kick in a little ways into sunset. It is a strong rain. Ooh. So, evening comes toward to all of you. Mostly an uneventful night. I will say here, Mostly an uneventful night. I will say here.

There you go. Just a second, I need to get all my audio ducks in a row here. Way to date this episode. Yeah. Way to date this episode. Way to date this episode. You hear it first. Shit. Catching your attention. Oh no. Yes!

Oh no. Very familiar. Welcoming delight. Okay. Ooh! There's lights in the pit. As you hear it from through the wood, laying in your bunk, keep your eyes closed.

Eventually, the early morning hours push you to rest, the thunder lulling you to sleep. Each of you find your way to your bunks as well as Orly takes over the ship and the rest of the crew keeps watch. Is it really rocky at this point? It's pretty rocky, back and forth. For some, it's uncomfortable.

For some, it's almost like being rocked as a baby. In your early storm-based dreams, the rumble brings with it imagery of you, once again lost in the barren plains of Xhorhas. All darkness, but for the distant red horizon. Your whole body is sore as you trudge through the mud and muck. You can see the storm brewing ahead,

and as you look down at your hands, you can see the shackles that once bound your wrists, chains dangling from them, now broken. As you look up once more, you can see the flash of light in the clouds above. And there's expectation. You look down ahead, and warmly alit before you is a path, red like the horizon itself. You look down ahead, and warmly alit before you is a path,

red like the horizon itself. Do you walk it? Mm-hmm. Absolutely. As you walk the path, onward, onward, a bolt of lightning hits the ground about 100 feet from you. The sound deafens your ears as the blast echoes. Your vision goes white for a moment,

but you keep pushing forward. Another flash, 40 feet from you, sending shards of rock and glass showering down from your left side. Do you continue on the path? Yes. Pushing forward, the rain begins to fall and pummel in you, turning to hail.

Your skin, numb with the hundreds and hundreds of vast and quick impacts. Another flash hits the path directly in front of you, scattering it into a small chasm before you. As you come close, it seems to widen with each step, the ground pulling further and further away until you come to the very edge. What do you do? I jump. around, pulling further and further away until you come to the very edge.

What do you do? I jump. You run and you leap. As you leap, the other side continues to stretch away. You fall and you fall and you fall, and you fall, and you look up as the wide mouth of this chasm goes further and further away, and looking up into the sky, all you see

are the electric eyes in the clouds. What do you do? I cry out to the Storm Lord, and I reach out a hand. What do you say? Please. Please help me. Prove. Prove. Prove.

A bolt of lightning strikes from the sky and hits you. Your entire body is rocked with pain. This vibration of strength has to cause every element of your senses to be rocked. You push through the pain as hard as you can to continue to keep your contact with this cloud. Go ahead and roll a wisdom saving throw for me. Ooh. It's a god. A wisdom saving throw for me. SAM and LAURA say,.

It's a card. Ooh. Nine. A nine. Nine. Nine. Sorry, a 10. A 10. Your muscles tense.

Nine plus one. And you continue to plummet. Prove. I'm going to Bamf out my wings. Yes! To the Crosstown Shroud. The pain through your body, Yes! You're a perfect shroud. The pain through your body, you can see the skin itself splitting

from where the energy required a place to escape. As you close your eyes and scream out loud into the darkness, this chasm now a razor-thin mark of red, clouded sky above. Before the abyss takes you, you scream and release the essence of the celestial blood that sits in your veins.

And with that, the chasm grows closer and closer and closer until you find yourself pushing out from the opening in the ground where once you fell, your feet resting once more on the path on the other side. As you stop and your wings gather around you, they are not black, but feathered. Oh my god.

Oh. The voice once more says, You are worthy, both of my guidance and of your own acceptance. This path before you is long, and I won't let you stray. Fjord.

Oh! Go ahead, go ahead. You also get a prize. A night of restless sleep comes to you. Jesus Christ. Whether it be the sound of the heavy rain hitting the glass doors on the outside of your captain's quarters, just the anxiety of the coming interaction,

but you toss and turn quite a bit. But once sleep does take you, you have visions of being in a forest once more, not unlike the one that you had traversed to help Caduceus find his family. You're alone, and you don't know where to go.

You travel a bit, and it just continues, almost the same, like it's a repeating glade. You push past trees. The rain now falls through the top of the forest, and you hear the disrumbles of thunder carrying into the space. What do you do?

Peening forest, thunder. God, these are hard. Ah. I will summon the sword. Can I sink it into the earth and try and listen for the voice of the Wild Mother? You summon the sword to your hand, and what stares back at you is not the runed blade

that you found on this journey, but the familiar curved falchion with a singular yellow eye looking back, and you feel a burning pain in your chest. It burns even brighter and hotter. And suddenly, it's a pain that is unbearable. As you come to consciousness, trying to scream, but you're winded.

As a dark figure stands over your bed, a blade plunged in your chest. Oh! The fucking girl! Oh no! You suffer 12 points of slashing damage, as well as four points of psychic damage. Terrible. Okay.

It's a priest of Uk'otoa or something. Uk'otoa. Uk'otoa. As you lie there, the blade, a familiar-looking, barnacle-encrusted falchion, partially thrust into your abdomen. The creature holding it appears humanoid before you. No. But you see heavy, tattered robes and slivers of cloth.

You see grayish blue skin. You see a humanoid face with long, thick tendrils of hair, yellow eyes, and the jaw itself seemingly split partially open and just breathing like an exaggerated predator. Let's go ahead and roll a mission. What?! What are you talking about?!

This unexpected combat is brought to you by Dwarven Forge. They'll be at Adepticon this year. Booth 801, bring your armies and wage war on the ultimate battlefield terrain. Find more at dwarvenForge.com. What? What is happening? Ooh! Where's his cabin? Where's his fort?

Where are the rest of us? Is he in Capsa's quarters and the rest of us are? Where's Yasha? Is Yasha flying out over the ocean? I don't even know. Yasha's having a Oh! Right now. I mean, those don't even look like boats, man. So this is the gun deck.

Yeah, what is it? This is the cut hole beneath. So top level, mid level, bottom level. That's so cool. Wait, mid level, bottom level, okay. You said blue skin. What the fuck is happening? Fjord, you are in bed.

While this creature is there. What is that? Is it like a Vonnegut? I mean, it's what I'm using for the creature. But you, no. Ah! That's not good to get far enough. Where are you guys sleeping in the ship?

I don't know! Are you the only place you sleep? Correct. It has the sword. I would be in a hammock between two cannons. I don't know. Okay. So we'll put you over here. What the fucking horse nipples is happening? Caught on the floor here?

Is this the same morning that I was prepping the boat? Or is this the next day? This is like 2.30 in the morning. Oh shit. After everyone's gone to sleep. I guess, um. Did you get me full body pimples? I'm going to be on the bottom bottom.

The bottom bottom? Yeah, in the green fancy bed. There you go. I was enjoying your shit, and I'm like, nope. Caught on the gun deck, the light here? Yeah. All right. There's a big double-wide, actually. Maybe I would take that big one.

You'd take the big one? Yeah. It's definitely the bed that says Hope Springs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's make our beds right now. Beauregard. Beauregard would also sleep on the floor. Beau is very comfortable sleeping on the floor.

Across from Caduceus? Across from Caduceus. All righty. Picking beds. Red bed. Red bed redemption? Red bed. Red bed. Red bed.

All righty. And two. What is it? So. Oh, you! All righty. Oh dear, dude. What is it? So. Oh, you! Oh, okay. Just a minute here as I situate this.

All right. Hmm. We wouldn't even know, though. Nope. Nope. So, Fjord, what'd you get? 15. 15, okay. We're not rolling yet.

All righty, getting this all situated and ready here for me to look at. So that's Fjord. Travis in the hot seat. I was just enjoying Ashley's ride, and then I got caught looking. It happens, man. It's his best friends.

Somehow. When he looks over at you and you're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Uh-huh. Please spare me another day. Today is not my day. Oh my god, look at the shark. I know, I was really enjoying the shark. Okay.

Thank you for getting us situated here. So Fjord, you are prone on the bed. You're not wearing armor because you were sleeping. Oh, should my AC be lower? Your AC is 10 plus your dexterity modifier right now. Oh, that's 10 plus my dex mod? Yep. Cool, that's 10. All right, cool. So it's their turn first. Whoa, plus dex.

Let's not run it down, okay? So this entity pulls the blade from your chest, an arc of blood across the outer wall in the window. On the side, just across the edge. It's going to go ahead and attempt to bite you. You watch its jaw, it's partially open, goes, and it goes towards you and attempts to clamp down on your body. What?

That's a natural 20. No! No! I believe you. What? That's a natural 20. No! No! I believe you. I'm rolling that sapphire dice. I believe you. Get rid of that. Good news is, it's not the other attack. I roll a six. So that's 12 plus five.

17 points of piercing damage as it sinks into your body and you feel the pain as it tears upward and you see there are bite marks scraped into your body and you feel the pain, as it tears upward and you see there are bite marks scraped into your abdomen. As it pulls up and sucks in some of the blood that it's taken from the wound, it's going to strike you twice with its sword. Okay.

It's a natural one. Fucking lucky. That's cocked. And it's a 24 to hit. So this blade strikes once towards you and you roll out of the way and it slams into the bed. As you pull back, it arcs upward and cuts you across the side. You take... 13 points of slashing damage.

Okay. And two points of psychic damage. All right. Shit, and that was in addition to the bite damage as well? Correct. Did you give me bite damage? Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. You did?

It wasn't terrible. I think I put it down. Oh, it was 17 points. Oh, that's different. Yeah, yep, 12 plus five. Okay. It's your turn, Fjord. That dude dropped me in half.

Whoa. Poor thing. That changes a lot, okay. Can I summon this? You summon your blade? Yep. Your sword summons to your side. Is it the real one? I know, which one is it? It's your ruined blade. And looking around, you can see the blade

in this creature's hand is the Sword of Fathoms. Or at least looks very much like it. Okay. Can I cast... I got to get the fuck out of here. Can I... I can't let him hit me again, I'm fucking smoked. I'm going to cast Far Step at 5th-level. Okay.

Which lets me teleport 60 feet to an unoccupied space. You can see each one of your turns before the spell ends. You can use a bonus action to teleport in this way again. I will out of the cabin's quarters onto the main deck. To where you can see, correct? Oh shit. Right now you only have visual outside this window and outside onto the deck out there.

Is this a doorway? Is there a door or just one person? No, this is a door that goes between technically, though it's not on the ship. But as a bonus action, you can then use the cat? On subsequent turns, yes. Oh, on subsequent turns. Let's roll with the Wild Mother.

I bamf out of the ship. Just out this way? Outside. How far do you go? Into the water, 60 feet. All right. So let's make it 40, I'll just make it 40, so I can stay within range.

You are in the ocean as you appear and just go into a full dive. Into the ocean, come up, breaking the surface. All right, you can move if you want to. Just flush the blood. Yeah, yeah. You have a very heavy open wound now filled with sea water. It stings a lot. It stings. And I'll just weekly shout out,

man overboard! But it's fucking thundering and lightning outside. It is. Rushing up to the side, you see Orly come dance over and go, Come! He starts looking for a rope and getting ready and starts shouting orders as other individuals

start rushing up. Marius goes over and starts helping to get the rope up there. Look at his little finger. Hello, I am Marius. Passive perception. You do see on the outside of the boat, climbing up beyond the view of them,

a handful of other creatures that are nearing the top of the boat. What the fuck are those things? Fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck. They're Ukutoko people! They all look humanoid, but they have fish-like fins on their forearms and across the head. Some of them look wrong,

where one arm is a weird tentacle and it's like climbing up the side and they're all almost to the top of the deck. You guys are all still sleeping. Do we hear anything? I will say, oh yeah, the ship is rocking. But is Fjord drifting away? He will be, I mean, it's not like a speedboat or anything.

I can pop back in. In six seconds, he can teleport back in, so I'm not too worried. All right, so that's the top of the round. I'm going to roll initiative for them now. Holy shit. We need to wake up. We need to stomp on the deck.

Man, oh well. It's a crew. What the fuck is that? All righty. Who is that? So, top of the round. Face is stinging. This entity breaks through the window and glances off the side, looking at you down at the ocean. You see it curl around the corner

after the glass sprays out the back of it. It is a good. The poor ball-eater. It's going to go ahead and cast Eldritch Blast at you. Ooh! This motherfucker. Eldritch Blast. That is, hilariously, that's a 10.

That's your AC, right? It is. It hits you. Oh jeez. Uh, heh. I thought I was going to get dressed. That's a nine. And that is a 20. So you get hit twice.

Wow. Oh no, oh no! So you take 17 points of force damage as the creature comes out and goes and throws these three blasts. One hits you in the shoulder, the other you dive below and it misses you, and you stand there for a second and feel one

that actually goes through the ocean below and strikes you in the side of the hip and the leg. Ooh. Now it's your turn, Fjord. Now it's my turn. I will shout out, Intruders! And I will use my bonus action to 60 feet

onto the main deck, past Orly, if I can. Up here? Yep. All right, there you are. Boy, boy, boy, boy. I can't, none of them are peeking over the side of the railing yet, right? They're just climbing up the side? Correct, they're like maybe about

five to ten feet from the edge. I'll use my action to scream as loud as I can. Everybody wake the fuck up! There is a bell that hangs there for a good- That works! All right. So you have to use your movement over here. Grab the bell and start clanging it. Everyone in the upper floor here, that hangs there for a good while. That works! All right. So you have to use your movement over here.

Grab the bell and start clanging it. Everyone in the upper floor here, you all begin to hear the bell. You all start coming to consciousness. Yep, nobody's in the bottom floor, so you guys are good. So everybody else, you begin to come to consciousness. Yeah.

We'll have your roll initiative at the end of this round. Oh my god. All righty. The bell starts happening. Some of the other crew members start waking up as well. Gets up, gets up. That's, oh no, Marius is up there. This is a proxy for

Shelda and then that there is representing his Gatlin. Gatlin. So, after Fjord finishes your turn, these creatures all reach the top. Orly! Leap over the edge. Oh god. Oh god. Slippery. Yep. Leap over the edge. Oh god. Oh god. Slippery. Yep. Leap over the edge there, and leap over the edge here.

This one here, you can see, has covered in these large quills on its back, these weird spines that all of a sudden with a flex protrude even further and it flexes its chest as one bends and fires out towards Marius. Cool. Wow. Oh yeah, that hits.

Wow. Marius takes nine points of poison damage. Can he make a constitution saving throw? Fails, Marius is poisoned. I'm a longer child. Oh no. All right, the one over there is going to attempt to fire a quill.

Well, it still has to be close to you. It's going to, after the rest of its movement, it just barely manages to get up close enough to you, Fjord, to catch up to you, and then does the same thing. Releases a quill from its chest towards you. It's cocked. That's a critical again. It's a natural 20. Damn!

I'll bet you're a lucky son of a bitch. Rolled a two. That's four points of poison damage. Okay. And you need to make a constitution statement for me. Okay. 18. 18, you're fine. Okay.

So as things are getting more and more intense, so does the music. Go. This is fucking dope! I don't know. All right. Crawling through the gun holes.

The gun holes! You see Nott as you're in the hammock and you hear the bellies and you look over your edge, you can see the wooden slats that usually close them are now open as these weird creatures are slithering through and then landing onto the gun deck. Just batten down those hatches. Batten down these hatches, did a shitty job of it!

Fucking Marius, goddammit. Is that a different one or just a different? That's a different one. He looks real fancy. He looks real fancy. Creepy crawlies. Do it on that side, then there's another here. Oh boy, guys, I have surrounders.

The ones that are standing like this all have one tentacle arm. The smaller ones have the quills. This one here has the grayish-blue skin, has this long, tattered robe similar to the one you had, that was not as well-dressed and as intense-looking, but it does have, where its mouth is, it has this weird open, double split on each side.

They're like. Oh! With the flexor? . So they just get in there. Terrible. Oh! Oh! With the flexor? Dun-dun-dun-dun! So they just get in there. Terrible. The crew's going to take their turn now. So Orly is going to go ahead and always going to go ahead and cast,

does he get these count as humanoid? Yeah, it does. Always going to go ahead and cast Charm Person on the two that are visible right there at second level. This is a slot. I'm sitting up there for each of those. That one fails. Nice.

That one does succeed, the one by you, but the one that's in front of Orly is now currently treating you, Orly at least, as an ally, and has gone from an aggressive stance to a and is just standing there looking around a little bit confused by the current scenario. With that, Orly's going to go ahead and dart back a bit

and try and back up to the side of the ship to take a gauge of what's happening while drawing a shortsword from the side. With that, Marius is going to go ahead and attempt to make a two-attack with a longsword against the guy that hits. Indeed, second attack misses with a three.

Aw, buddy. Does five damage to the guy in front of him. Aw. Yeah. He is. Oh, and he's poisoned, so he has disadvantage in the attacks. Actually, the first one misses. Oh jeez.

Second one does hit still, so it's fine. So it all worked out well in the end. That finishes the round. Everybody else roll initiative now, please. Help, help! For fuck's sake. All right, so 25 to 20. Hang on. Gross.

25 to 20, I'm going to roll a d8 on this one. Use my boots. Not that great. No, okay. Nobody? No. Okay, 20. 20 to 15.

18. 19? All right. Beau, you said 18? 19. 19? All right. I don't know what to do. All right, Beau, you said 18? Yeah. Okay. Anybody else? 15 to 10.

10 is your first five as a halfling, right? Yeah. I don't have a lot of, I don't have any area of effect attack. What'd you go for? Okay. What was your initiative? 15 to 10? 10. 10 for Caleb. Ooh.

Do you roll 15? Yeah. All right, 10 to five? Eight. Eight. Ooh. Hey. Cat and Vess. You got it, all right, Jester, you are up first.

Yeah. You hear the bell going off, you hear some moving upstairs, the ship's rocking, and you're just, what is going on? They sit up. Jensen's happy movement, getting up out of bed. I see this weird thing in front of me and all these. Sorry, to let you know, these are rooms. So you guys are in rooms here. Oh, I thought we were all just out in the open. is, sorry, to let you know, these are rooms, so you guys are in rooms here.

Oh, I thought we were all just out in the open. No, sorry. You guys all are in different rooms here separately. Oh, there's little white walls. These are little doors here, the little white elements there are the walls. Oh, okay. So right now, you don't know what's going on,

all you hear is the bell ringing. Okay, so I'll get up and I walk out the door. What's going on here? I step out into a hallway and immediately you see the edge of something weird here, and then a lot of these, from eyeline, you can really only see these two, maybe. Actually, you'd probably get around there before you'd see.

So one, two, one, two, three. You can get about there, I'd say. Now you see Nott there in the middle of the room looking over and reacting to all these creatures that have filtered in from the gun deck openings. What are you doing? Oh god. Oh god, okay. Well, the thing I was going to do is a little bit much.

I'm going to do it. What are you doing? I'm going to do it. What are you doing? I'm going to do a Blade Barrier. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Where are you? I'm going to cast it. It's a 100-foot straight wall, but I'm guessing I get to choose where I want it to be, right?

Yeah, you've got a vertical wall of whirling, nice, sharp blades. 20 feet high. Whoa. Mm-hmm. You get a straight wall up to 100 feet long, 20 feet high, and five feet thick, or a ringed wall up to 60 feet in the diamond. Ringed wall.

Well, but I would ring you, and then you wouldn't be able to get out. I'll be fine. All right, so what are you doing? I'm going to, are these the only ways to get upstairs? Correct, yeah. I'm going to cast a barrier from starting at this guy. I'm just going to bring it out like that

and end it across here to where we still have access on this side. Those guys would be not in it, but. Okay, so we will say... Like, is he in the middle of the wall, the guy in front of you? Yeah. I'm just marking this, the wall is about here

is where you're going. Yeah. Okay. So, as you summon it. That's a bad placement for it. This five-foot wall thick of blades whirling and spinning, starts thrashing through, rending all the creatures in this space, as well as all the cannons.

I didn't know it was, I thought it was just creatures! Oh well. When a creature enters the wall, it didn't say anything about cannons! Well, Fireball doesn't say anything about, you know, blowing up trees, necessarily,

but if you threw Fireball on a tree, it's fine. The cannons are made of metal. Yeah. They're going to be fine. The wheels are going to be probably destroyed. They're going to be a little harder to move and aim. My cannons! That's okay, then. My cannons!

But the wall is up. That's your action. Did I get, I got that guy in it, then. I can't do this! But the wall is up. That's your action. Did I get, I got that guy in it, too. Correct, yeah. They're all in that space there. You have a great marker for that. Yeah, that's cool. What a fucking dumbass spell I just did.

Whatever. No, you didn't. You're all good. You're learning. You're learning. You did great. All righty, is that your turn? I'm going to, do I have any, I don't have any more movement. Is that all my movement? That's all your movement. Okay.

All right, Beauregard, you're up. Captain, I wake up and... Half your movement, get up. I come out. You come out in the hallway. Or you can get just in front of Jester if you want to. You just see this large wall of blades and creatures starting to swarm. I just crash into Jester and I'm like,

what's happening? I don't know, I'm attacking things. What? I'm going to run upstairs. I'm attacking things. Step of the Wind, I'm going to try and squeeze past Jester and bolt upstairs with another 50 feet of movement. Okay.

Oh, that's where the stairs are. Yeah. 40, is it 50 feet? Yeah. That'll get you just out to here, I'll say. You do suffer two, three attacks of opportunity as you rush through. That's okay. Step of the Wind.

Step of the Wind, no, I think, well, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Just making sure there's nothing weird there about that. You're right. Monks are weird. I can either disengage or dash. Okay, disengage or you dash. Yes, no, you dashed. So I'm dashing.

All right, so, that in mind. You go ahead and suffer from... With your best shot, it's right here. It's going to strike at you with a blade in one hand. That is a 22 to hit? Yes. All right. You suffer six points of slashing damage. Okay. Plus four points of necrotic.

Okay. From this rusty-looking blade. The two others there are going to strike at you, one with a tentacle and one with unarmed strike. Unarmed strike, oof, no, that misses. One with a tentacle, that's going to be a 16, which misses. So you just start by and head up there. So that's your movement and your bonus action.

Yes. Am I able, can I survey the scene? Where's my movement, my bonus action? I'd say you can see up here, because you just got out here, and that's above you, and it's blocking your vision. So you don't see where Fjord is, you don't see the creature with it.

Up here, you can see this creature, you can see Marius Curtain dealing with this, you can see Orly, who's just backing away and glances over to notice you. There's one that I have. I'll use the rest of my movement again to get in between Orly and come and help fucking Marius. You got it.

So you dart up and join in with that creature right there and hold it in place. You got it. All right, finishing Beau's turn, it is now this guy's turn. Climbs up the side of the ship. Before Laniathop comes over onto the rain-slicked surface, the top of the upper deck there, and is going to go ahead and

is going to use its action to cast Armor of Agathys. Wow. You now watch as. What is Megaford? Oh, it's like, crazy. You watch as the rain, the rain water that's spattering across it suddenly like

and all the rain water starts gathering as chunks of ice until eventually it creates these spines, these jagged quills of frozen water. And with every rain droplet that hits, it only adds more and more to it. It's a dope visual, but okay. And he's going to use the rest of the movement to just move right there.

Jester, Beau, was there somebody before Jester? Not me. Now it's Fjord's turn, and then it's Yasha, you're on deck. I will take one step away from, no, he's in melee with me, isn't he? Correct. I will use my bonus action to try something crazy.

I'm going to try and bar a step. Oh, just as a note, too, before I forget, make a constitution saving throw for me. Oh, right. Because the spine? Yep. 13. 13's fine. Oh, right. Because the spine? Yep. 13. 13's fine. Oh, okay. It was a DC of 10. Didn't do a lot of damage to you, so.

I'm going to try and use my bonus action to use Far Step to go 60 feet up onto this mast, onto this buckle, and hold onto the main mast. You got it. Not even going to the main mast. I don't think I can get there in 60 feet. This is more than 60 feet from there, right? I'd say it's upwards of 70 feet, if I'm not higher.

I'll just go halfway. Yeah, cool. About there, we'll see. If I'm holding on with one arm, I will send three Eldritch Blasts down at that guy. The one that was just next to you? Yeah. Go for it. That's a cool spell.

Boop, boop. How high is it in here? And there in the deck, I'd say it's about maybe... 19 to hit? Maybe seven feet. Seven, okay. Yeah, it's not... It's tight. Historically, they were like five feet. Hmm? Historically,

they were like five feet. This is a fantasy world. I have a question. 19 hit this guy? I'm not being indignant about your blade. No, no, no, no, I have an actual question about it. Historically, there were no fish people. That's true.

What was that? 19? 19 hits. Okay, that's 11 points of force damage on the first one. That's 15 to hit. I hit one. 15 to hit does hit. Oh, 15 hits, okay, that's good. That's 14 points of force damage.

Nice. And the third one is a natural 20. Ooh! All righty. Dope action. That is 14 doubled, which is 28, and an extra damage die. Well, you doubled the dice, and an extra damage die. Well, you doubled the dice, not the bonus. Oh. So it was so. But don't I have Savage something?

Savage checker means you can re-roll it once if you want to, but. I had something when I crit. It is, when you score a crit, you roll one of the dice an additional time to add to the extra damage. Oh, that's all right. Savage attacks. Correct, but like, yeah. So what'd you roll for the first die?

28 was, so 14 doubled. 14 is what you rolled originally? Mm-hmm. Right. Okay, without adding the bonus. Right. Got you, okay, I misunderstood, yes. So do I double the 14 and then add the 13? Or no, just double it?

You double it and then you add the additional die roll. Oh great, so 28 plus 13, so 41. Well, Savage Attacker, okay, what are you adding the 13 from? Oh great, so 28 plus 13, so 41. Well, Savage Attacker, what are you adding the 13 from? Well, I rolled another, well, that's a d20, that's the wrong one. Correct. So it'd be 28 plus four. Okay, there we go, 32.

I rolled the wrong damn dice. No worries. That's enough, one round of just blasts, you end up just icing this creature. And you see it now, its body leaking this clear, almost sea foam-like blood from the wounds that are left behind.

Okay. That's my turn. All right, Fjord turns over. Yasha, you're up. Okay, so I'm going to wake up and walk out of this little area. Okay. Hello. Ooh, there's lots of blades here. 25, 30, 35. Okay.

You can see there's now creatures surrounding you and Nott's right there. So these two are in a wall of fire? Wall of blades. Wall of blades. Just whirring all around. Because of the cannons. All right. There are sparks everywhere from it hitting the metal.

Pretty cool. Sparks. Oh god. Yeah, yeah. A lot of gunpowder in this room. Oh god. Oh wow. Okay, so I'm going to walk over to this guy. Right over there to the right. See that he's not supposed to be there. Hey, Veth.

Hi, good morning. Take a swing. Go for it. Yeah, okay. You want to rage in before you do that? Oh yes, of course, absolutely. I'm raging, I'm raging. 23 to hit.

That hits. Okay. So, ooh, that's, I'm going to do that again. Okay, so that was seven, okay, so. Oh, that's, I'm going to do that again. Okay, so that'll set them in case. Oh, that's a little better. Eight. Fucking can't even just do fireball in the middle of that.

I'll take care of all of them. 18 for the first hit. 18 points of damage, you got it. Attack again. Yeah, 26. 26 hits. Are you doing okay? Are you dying? Are you okay?

I'm okay. She's having a bad day. I'm okay, I'm leaking, but I'm okay. Are you near the, where are you? 20 points of damage total. Oh, that's right. 20 points of damage total, all righty, nice. The second hit?

That was the second hit, the righty, nice. The second hit? That wasn't the second hit, it was the 20th. Or is it 20 points? 20, that was the second hit. Nice. Yeah. All right, so as you rush up and hack once and a second time into this creature, it looks pretty hurt. You carve into its body and you see

how there's the opening inside and where its organs are. They're almost translucent, like whatever coloration it would be if you're used to seeing the internal organs, everything, and there is weirdly seafoam and see-through, clear, it's awful, but it's still standing. Okay, and then as a, who all is in within 60 feet?

I mean, does that count upwards as well? Yep, if they can see you. Oh, if they can see me. Only two. I'm going to wait on that, then. Okay, If they can see you. Oh, if they can see me. Only two. I'm going to wait on that, then. Okay. Okay. That finishes your turn. All right, now it is the sea spawn turn.

The three of these two there. So the blade wall. What is the damage on that one? It is 6d10. Roll that damage. Roll that damage. I did. So I wouldn't have to do it. I rolled 32.

32, all right. That's a failed dex save on number one. A natural one on the other. So is that instead of? 32 points. 36 points? 32. 32 points. 32, sorry, 32.

Ooh. That's... They're hurting. Immediately as their turn starts, they're like, . That's. Yep, this one's going to rush out here to get in with Nott. This one's going to go ahead and rush over here.

Actually, I was going to stay here against Nott. I was going to stay with Yasha there. All right, so the two against Nott are going to strike. They have, oof, three attacks. All right, so two arm strikes, and one with a tentacle. So since you're up front, they have advantage.

What? Even though you're being flanked there. So the first one is going to be a 20 to hit. Hit! Second one is going to be a 15. Hit! No miss. All right, and the last one is going to be a 22. Hit!

All right, so you take seven points of bludgeoning damage. Uh-huh. And then from the tentacle, you take nine points of bludgeoning damage. Then from the tentacle, you take nine points of bludgeoning damage and you are grappled. Ooh. As the tentacle wraps around you and holds you in place.

The other one now is going to take its turn. That's going to be a 25 to hit. Hit! 14 to hit. Miss! And ooh, 26 to hit. Hit! So as this one bludgeons you with its unarmed strike,

you take four points of bludgeoning damage. But its other tentacle hits you for 15 points of bludgeoning damage. I will reduce that one. Okay, so you take seven instead. Uncanny dodge. You got it. Holy poley.

But I'm grabbed. This one here that is charmed by Orly is just going to go ahead and walk over into the space in the middle here and just look around, waiting. It's not aggressive. The one that's next to Marius is going to go ahead and turn towards you, Beauregard.

Since you just rushed up, it's going to turn and it's going to attempt to fire another poison quill at you. Yeah. As well as two unarmed strikes. So you can do that all together now that it's up on top. So the unarmed strikes are going to be, oof, a 12.

Miss. And a 22. Hit. All righty, so you do take four points of bludgeoning damage. Okay. Poison Quillstrike. Oh shit, that's going to be a 22 to hit. Hit.

You take six points of poison damage, but you're immune to poison. And you don't have to make saving throws, you're immune to poison. Oh wow. But it doesn't know that. I just fake it a little. Ah! Yep.

Ooh! Ooh! Ooh,auseous! And the one that's coming for you, Yasha, let's get three attacks on you. That's going to be a 21 to hit. Yep. 15 to hit.

No. And 17 to hit. Yes, just hits. Okay, gotcha. Yeah, who's that guy? So the first hit deals, oh my god, four points of bludgeoning damage. Does that halve?

Yes, the two. Okay. Then its tentacle strike is going to be 13 points of bludgeoning damage, reduced to six, and you are grappled. What do Yasha's wings look like? They're not out yet. That was just in the dream.

I was imagining, like, toucan colors. Mm-hmm. It's an action to use that. Macaw wings. All right. So finishing their element now, it is now Caleb's go with another creature on deck. So yeah, go ahead.

Okay, so Storm Awake, grab my satchel and just bust out the door because I hear all the noise and see, I can see Jester and this fish man near her? Yes. If I'm in the hallway? As you step out into the hallway, I would say you can just barely see him. Yeah, okay, so Caleb jams his hand into his pack,

pulls out a cocoon, starts waving in the air, and casts Polymorph at that guy. At him? Yeah. Okay. 17 wisdom. He's in the middle of a blade barrier, too, just so you know. Okay. Would I see that?

No, you do not. You wouldn't? He wouldn't, not from where he's standing. All right. What's a blade barrier? I don't even know what that is. Is it a wisdom save? Wall of sword. I don't see swords spinning around?

It rolled a 19. Okay. So 16 plus three. But I wouldn't see swords flying around in the air? From this angle, because there's a wall in a corner there, you're probably hearing everything, but it's just beyond your view of the angle. It's like a giant battle. There's a whole wall right here in the corner.

Oh, well, I assumed I saw him, because you have to see him to cast the spell. You can see him, but he's just on the outside of the blade wall. Okay. Oh, nice, I can see him. So you can see him just past that corner, barely. Oh shit. So he resists the spell. You're going to stay put?

I thought I used all my movement. You used 15 to get up, and then five to move out there. So now I'll move 10 feet forward. Okay. Into the hall 10 feet forward. Okay. Into the hall a little closer. Okay. Got it. All right, now it is this guy's turn. And this guy's turn.

Ooh! Here's my question. This is why I was wondering. Because it's 20 feet high. Yeah? Does that mean that it would be, if the ceilings are only seven feet high, would it be sticking out another 13 feet up above,

or 12 feet above the upper deck? If you want to, you can keep it segmented, or you can let it go through, in which case it will destroy the deck above it and carve through. Okay. Because the blades will have to cut through the floor to contain it. Okay.

But if you want to, just keep it to that deck. I'll let you do that because you are in control of this. Okay. Which one is it doing? Okay. She's got you. She'll destroy the ship. I'm going to destroy the ship.

Burn it all! First, that guy. Go ahead and roll damage for him. Let's see if he can make his dexterity save to escape. No, he rolls terrible. That's what I get for urinating. 15, 24, 29. 29, ooh. 29 points of damage to him.

All righty. He's going to step out of the blade element there in the middle, and as he steps right in front of you, Jester, with a little gibbering open jaw, inhales and, I don't like it. This screech, this piercing cry just echoes throughout, through the upper deck.

Everyone within 300 feet that can hear him, which is everyone. Whoa! 300 feet. I need to go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw. Oh my goodness. Oh, boyzie. Oh, not cool. Yay! Fjord. Not cool.

I have the battle mode, that's good. 19. 19, you're okay. Five. Beauregard, you are stunned. Stunned? Fuck. Caleb. 19. 19, you're okay. Five. Beauregard, you are stunned. Stunned? Fuck. Caleb. 16. Caleb, you're fine. 20. You're fine, Veth.

19. You're fine, well, good roll. 25. Fuck, guys. Natural one. Next to mine. Yasha is stunned. Two heavy hitters. For the rest of the crew.

That was The two. Stunned. Marius. Bloodbath. Stunned and poisoned. Marius. Rest of the crew there. Stunned.

Oh my god. And stunned. This is not going well. Okay. Cool, cool, cool. His turn. The other one that just came up on deck up there is going to go ahead and move into Orly.

There's two of them. I should have just sent it through the roof. I should have just sent it through the roof. We'd be sinking. You have the option. It's okay. It's going to make all of its attacks on Orly. Orly is currently... stunned, so he has advantage on the attacks.

So the first one is going to be... Oh, that's really shitty. That's a miss. In his defense, it's really dark outside. Okay, and hits with claw, and then hits with sword. Okay, Orly takes. This is a very cool encounter. Yes, it is.

It's very terrifying, it's a lot. 12 points of damage. Oop. And six points of damage. So Orly's just like, Orly's going and holding his head, at which point this creature emerges over the top of the deck, pulls a blade out

that also looks very familiar, covered in barnacles and having a somewhat falchion-like shape to it. Do two people have that blade? And goes and claws and then bites into. Members only jackets? Yep. How many people did Uk'otoa? Uk'otoa. Uk'otoa.

And that's their turn. That brings us to Caduceus and Veth. I'll go first. Feel free. If you want to. Maybe Veth has the higher dexterity, but you can choose to relinquish two caduceus if you'd like. It won't matter much.

I can go first, just so I can get out of the way of whatever you're doing. Nothing super exciting, but we'll see. Me neither. I will reach out to the one who is grappling me and be like, get off me, sir! And I will cast Shocking Grasp. Shocking Grasp, on which one?

On that one there, yes. Okay, go for it. 20 to hit. 20 to hit, that definitely hits. 3d8. What's a d8 look like, this one? Ooh. I won. Seven.

14 points, O damage. Yeah, that does it. Between the blade damage that it had taken, it was already shredded all over, and then as it came forward, wrapped in the tentacle, you reached out and grabbed it, and as that pulse of electrical energy tore through its body, you watch it

and suddenly its eyes smoke, and it then falls to the ground, destroyed. So I'm no longer grappled? They were both grappling you. They're both grappled? Yeah. Goddamn it! They both wrapped you in tentacles. But then I can't do anything else, right?

Because I can't move. You can't move. You got your bonus action. Bonus action. I don't really have any bonus actions. All right. So I will bonus action cast Mage Hand. All right, there you go. Great. There's a Mage Hand. Where do you want it to be?

Just right in front of the guy's face. All right. Waving in his face, waving in his face. Hi. Caduceus, you're up. I'm going to get up, leave the room. Oh, wow, okay. Excuse me, I'm going to just gently push by Caleb,

get in front of Caleb as far as I can go. That's about as far as you can get there. All right. Where's I? 15, 10, yeah, that's as far as you can get right there. Give you a little cover, and suppose I'm just going to get off our ship, Spirit Guardians, at fourth level. Nice.

All righty. Whoa, look at that! That's 15 feet in every direction. I want to see Matt put that on his head and wear it like a crown. Ooh, it would be a really pretty crown. You got it. You got it? You'll put that on his head and wear it like a crown. Ooh, it would be a really pretty crown. You got it. You got it? You'll put it on your head

and wear it like a, oh. You should see Matt in a bigger swan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, the little brooms! The little brooms! Hello. New fun toys. So yeah, anybody within it is half speed.

Right, half speed. Right, half speed at the top of their turn. At the top of the turn, or if they try and enter it, they take damage. You got it. Both of you are all concentrating on space. Makes a wisdom saving throw. You got it. All right, so that's your action and your movement. Anything else, you good?

Just double checking. And I don't have any bonus actions. No, not yet, I'm good. Okay. All right, the crew goes stunned, stunned, stunned, stunned until the end of the creature's next turn, so they're all just stunned. Top of the round. Jester, you're up. Okay.

There's just multicolored beetles everywhere. Right, this is beautiful. Yeah, there's some new fancy ones. For my bonus action, I'm going to cast Spiritual Weapon. Okay. At 4th-level. At 4th-level.

Right behind the squiddy guy, yeah. Right there. Okay. So that's a 19 to hit. 19 does hit. Oh, good. Okay. 11 points of the damage.

You got it. As it appears and then hits him from behind. At the same time, I'm going to, I'm just assuming, does he look undead at all or does he look just like? Looks very deep sea alien. It doesn't look undead, it looks like something you've never seen before with a sea-esque motif. Then at the same time, I'm going to reach my hand forward

and cast Toll the Dead. All right. Bring that fucking bell. Giant bell over top of his head. Boom! Was that a dex save? Constitution? That is a wisdom save. Wisdom save. Natural 20. Ooh.

Okay. Still take half or nothing? No, I don't think so. No, not for the camp. I can't do anything. Okay, so finish turn, Jester? Apparently. All right, Beau, you're up. Stunned? I can't run by him, no?

Not passing him, there's not enough room, no. You're right there. All right, so you're stunned. This guy over here. Fuck, man. He's going to step over here. Don't look any of this. Who are these fuckers?

So where are the ones with the falchions? One, two. I don't know what that dude down at the bottom with the spider legs has on him. Which one was the one who first attacked you? The guy up there. This one right here. He's got armor agate and stuff. I thought he was one of the falchions in this world.

I don't know, I thought it was a pretty unique sword. It's going to go ahead and step off to the side here and do three Eldritch Blasts against you four. I didn't wait that well, okay. That is a 16. That hits. Natural 20. That's three natural 20s. And an 11. No, I can't. Goddamn you! I'm not up there.. Yeah, and a 11.

Goddamn you! I'm not up there. All right, all three hit. You take four points of force damage. Okay. 16 points of force damage from the crit, and nine points of force damage from all of that. 29 points of damage? Wow, you do that really fast.

Wow. Wow, wow. Okay, cool. Burialits let's see. Fjord, if you go down while you're hanging from something, you'll take a damage. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Then is going to use this movement.

Go back, piece of shit. There. Oh. Just pull back in that space. Do you have a distance ruler back there? Like a little plastic flimsy thing? That's it right there, actually. It's using for that.

Where are you, Marish? I can trade it out for something if you want to use it. I'm stunned by Marish. You're stunned? Yeah. A stunned monk is like nothing. All right, Fjord, you're up.

Yasha, you're on deck. Okay. I'm going to try something. So the distance, I'm trying to... Yeah, I'm going to shimmy. I need you to make three constitution saving throws, by the way. Ooh, fuck. Holy shit.

Oh, to maintain far step? Maintain Far Step, yes. Okay, I have a War Caster. Correct, so the first one is, what is it, a con? Yes. Saving throw? Yes. 21. You're fine. Second one, this one's going to be high. Is it 23? You're fine, third one?

And 20. You're fine, all right, Far Step maintains. War Caster for the win. War Caster's still a bit of a test. I would like to shimmy around this side of the mast, and I'm going to release and fall about five to 10 feet, and I am going to cast Hexblade's Curse at the gentleman that's wielding the falchion below me,

just about five feet after I fall. Okay. That's awesome. And then I'm going to use. Through the air, That's awesome. And then I'm going to use. Through the air, just curse it. And then I'm going to far step back up to the crow's nest. All right. Yes. On top. That's rad. That was so cool.

As you watch as you fall, and as you concentrate outward, your sword behind you like that, from the ground beneath, you watch as, from the wood, green vines suddenly emerge from the long dead wood and wrap around the legs and then begin to dig up into its various limbs and hold it in place as the hexblade's curse now through the Wild Mother's vision takes hold. And as you're about to land, you

and then appear up on top and catch yourself just shirtless, bloody, holding the blade in one hand on the top, the rain just bearing down on you. Ooh, ooh! How much movement on you. Ooh! Ooh! How much movement would you say I have left? So glistening in the moonlight? You moved around the mass before falling, I'd say, and that took a little climbing,

I'd say you have 15 more feet. Okay, great, I'm going to lean over the railing and I'm going to send two Eldritch Blasts down at the one that I just cursed. You got it. That was awesome, Travis. That was so cool. 16 on the first one.

16. Does that miss? That hits. It does hit, okay, great. Are you sure it's not for the collision of sparks and beetles happening below? Eight points of force damage. Eight points of force damage. And the second one is a 23 for damage. Only eight points of force damage again.

The third one I'm going to send at this motherfucker and say, I know that spell. And that is a 20 to hit. And that is 15 points of force damage. Add an additional eight points, two fours to this guy because the Hexblade's cursed, there's a plus four. Oh, right, an additional eight, you said? Mm-hmm. You got it. So I'll send the two and the one,

and then I'm going to use the rest of my movement to just lay down on the crow's desk. Just fully prone. You got it. Okay. I have technically made a pillow fort up. You got it. Okay. I have technically made a pillow fort up there, just saying. Okay. Fair enough. It's got a lot more cover.

It's very comfortable. Yasha, you're up. Okay. Well, you're stunned. Okay. Sorry, I just realized. Yeah. Sorry. It's okay. Okay. So it's turn. Now the stuns, no, the stuns don't wear off yet.

It is now the Seaspawn's turn. Sneeze-snawn. Sneeze-snawn. The one that's up against you, Yasha, because you are stunned, it has advantage on it, strikes against you. So for that one, it's going to be 19 to hit.

That hits. Is she still raging in her stunnedness? Mm-hmm. Okay, good. And hit. Double ones. Yeah! That's a rare sight. I feel like he pisses himself just because of that point. He's watching you go,

oh, that's two natural 20s. Yeah. All right, so you take 10 points of bludgeoning damage reduced to five. Okay. And from the tentacle, All right, so you take 10 points of bludgeoning damage reduced to five. Okay. And from the tentacle that's now squeezing you, then its grasp, ooh, that is

12 points of bludgeoning damage reduced to six. All right. This one here that's still grappling Nott is going to go ahead to attack you twice. You are still prone because you haven't had any movement to get up, so he has advantage on his attacks against you. That is a 23. Hit!

25. Hit! And a natural 20. Cancel. Great clear. Uh-oh. Do you have to see the person who's attacking or do you have to see the person who's being hit? That's a good question, let me find out.

Because you can not see Nott right now. No! Let me see. Da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da. There is no Nott within it. Mm. Here we are. Getting used to it.

My bad. Well, the creature, fuck. So the creature who suffers the hit. Yeah, so you cannot see him. No! All right. I will Uncanny Dodge that last one. Oh wait, can I? I'm grappled.

I can't Uncanny Dodge. Well, no, it's a reaction. You still have your action. Okay. But if you have your Uncanny Dodge and Slenderman. So you can. I have no reaction either. No worries. So. Did you miss your reaction?

No, I didn't. Did not. You, Veth, take nine points of bludgeoning damage from an unarmed strike, eight points of bludgeoning damage from another unarmed strike, and then the tentacle, oh, 25 points of bludgeoning damage.

Uncanny touch. Reduced to half, so that brings you to 12. Where you at? I'm fine. Yep. Me too. All right. On a cloudy day. This one here takes how much damage?

Oh, did he just come up in? He would've. Oh, I should roll. Come up, come up, come up, yeah. Actually, he would've left it last round. I forgot to pull him out of there. But I'll let it happen, because I didn't pull him out. That's fine, that's my fault. A lot's happening there.

14, 22, 23, 26, 28, it keeps lower every time. 28 points. They're getting dull. Let's see if it makes a save. Yep, that's an 18, so it takes half. That's a nine, so it's still up. Nine point, no, 28.

Takes nine, sorry, so 28. Divided by two. Right, sorry, so that's 14. 14. 14, my bad. Still up, though. Barely. It's going to pull out of the blades. There's no way for it to get over there. I mean, it can try. It's going to pull out of the blades. There's no way for it to get over there.

I mean, it can try. It's going to move past, not to there, and it's actually going to go, it's looking that you're wrapped up and being crushed. You're the one who's currently stunned, Yasha, so it's going to go after you. Okay. So it's going to make two unarmed strikes

and then one with its poison quills. Since you are stunned, it has advantage. That is a 17 to hit. Which it hits. Ooh a 17 to hit. Just hits. Ooh, 22 to hit. Yep. And 19 to hit. Yep. All right. Tank. Fucking tank. You take

seven points of bludgeoning damage reduced to three. Okay. Four points of bludgeoning damage reduced to two. Okay. And eight points of poison damage that is not reduced, and you need to make a constitution saving throw. 18. All right, you are not poisoned.

Okay. Good time, good time. Okay. That brings us to Caleb. I'm hoping to use my reaction to shout. Actually, this guy, I forgot about this guy. I figured it has to go. My apologies.

Louis de Bolles. I would like to use my reaction to shout, Caduceus Jester, duck, get down! All right. Oh, and there's the guy next to you. Yasha hasn't attacked you yet, did he? No. Right, so.

You just did, it was, yeah. Yeah, that guy. So the guy below is going to go after you. That is going to be 20 to hit. Yep. 18 to hit. Mm-hmm. And

16 to hit. No. That misses, all righty. So you take six points of bludgeoning damage, reduce to three. No. That misses, all righty. So you take six points of bludgeoning damage reduced to three. Okay. And six points of bludgeoning damage reduced to three. Okay. Fucking rage. All right, the guy up here has a stunned Marius

and a stunned Beauregard. It's going to split its attacks between the two of you. Okay. So it's going to go ahead and attack you first, Beauregard, with advantage. That's going to be a 20, Beauregard, with advantage. That's going to be a 20 to hit. Yep. Just hits. Attacking Marius.

It's an 18 that hits. Then back to you, Beauregard, with its quill. That is going to be a 23 to hit, but you're immune to poison, so it doesn't do anything, but it's not unaware of that. So you, Beauregard, you take... You did it again. 11 points of bludgeoning damage. Okay.

Marius takes five points of bludgeoning damage. Fuck my life. Marius is starting to look hurt. We are not even out of the bottom of the ship. Yes. Nope. All right, finishing up with their turn. Now it is your turn, Caleb.

All right, so I just use Reaction to yell to Caduceus and Jester to duck, so it's up to them. I'll use my Reaction to crouch, or at least pull against the wall, get out of the way if you're going to shoot something by me. Unfortunately, it's not your turn yet, so no. Not as a reaction, they can't? Part of the strategy here is you have to kind of,

you know, if they're going to move out of the way, they have to do that on their turn. Okay, they don't, so I will not do the spell I was going to do, I will cast Polymorph again, 17. Nice. Okay, same guy there. That is going to be a... About to take, oh. 16.

Hey! 17, right, is your DC? Yeah. So yeah, no, that works. What are you polymorphing, Matt? A mackerel. Oh my god. What are you polymorphing this? A mackerel. Uh-huh. Oh my god.

What is a mackerel? It's a big fat fish. Big fish, big fat fish. We'll say... Brain, brain burn. We'll just use this light as the mackerel there. That's not what I wanted to do. So now.

On the ground. We're talking like the more epic video, just like on the ground. Good pull. And I and More epic video, just like on the ground. And I leave the rest of my turn to say, throw it out one of the portholes! Okay. Okay. All right, that finishes Caleb's go. It's now their turn, so it's the deep,

what are, you don't know their names yet. The Snowspout. I'm pretty sure they get to go The deep what? Nothing. It's not going to do. What happens to the people in the spirit guardian? Oh!

I guess the next two gets hurt by the spirit guardian. If I don't want them to back off, if I can see her shift, I think I can pull it back. Let me double check on that. Yeah, that's my question. I'm not into this, I'm not into this. Just kill me, man. I'm not my king. When you not into this. Just kill me, man. Not my king.

When you pass the spell, you can designate a target. Yeah, so it's two hits. So he's going to take damage. Yeah. Okay. So first, he needs to save. Oh, that's a two, it's a failure, so. 25, I want to say, 25 points of damage. Okay, now Sam Mackerel has one hit point.

Takes 24, immediately. Yeah, good stuff. He's looking really hurt, though. That's good. He's taking a lot of rough hits. Just double-checking, it's a 24.'s taking a lot of rough hits. Just double checking. It's a 24. No, I didn't want to stick him in there.

She had her neck mixed up. 24, yeah, radiant damage. Okay, and that's him right there. Perfect. So now, this guy's here. He's seeing you go up there. What can he do? Oh yeah, he spent his entire turn as a fish.

Cool. Well, here, does it? Top of its turn, actually, now. Correct, so now he still has his turn to go. Yep, never mind. Okay. In fact, we'll take his turn now. He is going to go all in against Jester in front there.

First, the bite. I'm going to use... It's a 19 to hit? 19 is my armor class. I'm going to use my reaction to cast Hellish Rebuke. Go for it. So first, you take from the bite attack eight points of piercing damage.

Okay. You just make a constitution saving throw for me. Whoa! 10. All right, you're fine. You maintain your blade, but you're better. Oh, okay. So now you have your Pelasher Buke.

Constitution save or dexterity save for him? Let me see. Come on, come on. Just want to get us all out of the bottom of this fucking... That is... dex save. Dex save. That is a 17. Nah, he saves, but he still takes half damage. So that's 3d10.

Mm. 10, 14, so seven points of cold damage. Seven points of cold damage. He's hurt real bad. Ah! come on! Come on, Matt! He's definitely going to make that save. Second attack against you, Jester,

this is going to be a claw attack, and that's going to be a 13. Misses, you push away from your shield. As you push away from the shield, the ice digs into it and takes its rusted-ass blade and backswings against you you for 16 to hit. You messaged!

You just stop it with the shield and push him back in place. Oh man. This guy up here, he's going to go all in on Orly, because he's right there. Oh! No, Orly!

God, I'm reading shit here. That's 22 to hit. Oh. 16 to hit. Hits, and yeah, all three hit. So Orly takes eight points of... Oh, this shell's really strong. He's piercing.

Oh, that's a d6. Maybe he can just suck himself back in. He would if he wasn't stunned. Oh, that's a d6. Maybe he can just sort of like, suck himself back in. He wasn't stunned. Oh, he can't do it. And then, one, two, three. He's giving himself those exhaust pipes. And I think you get plus five, you're AC when you do that.

Ooh, that's cool. But you roll a roll. But then you're fucking fucked. Unconscious and bleeding out. Bullshit. No, he's unconscious. Oh no! Orly, no! You've. Oh no! Orly!

No! You've got healing powers, don't you, Fjord? Not all the way up here. That finishes those guys' turn. The stun wears off. Oh, good. Maybe Amias is a healer. Hey!

Yash, come out! Hey! Fjord, wow. This guy's still in bed like, what's going on? And that other guy, too. What's going on? Oh man, what's all these beetles around here? Keep hearing them, what's going on out there? All righty, thank you for the sound effect.

All right, that finishes their go. Caduceus and Veth, you guys are up. Oh. I'm going to move, first thing I'm going to do, actually, is I'm going to move, first thing I'm going to do, actually, is I'm going to cast Sacred Flame on that jerk right in front of us. Mm-hmm.

For my action. Sacred Flame? Yeah. That guy. I got it there. Okay. Dexterity save. No, it's a fail. Okay, so that's 13, 18 points of radiant damage. He watches the radiant burst,

like, bursts in the chest, and as he pulls back, the beetles just swarm into the wounds. He's like, and they all start pouring out of the eyes and the ears, eating him from the inside. I'm not in the mood. I'm just watching it like, I'm going to step,

and I'm going to take my full movement forward. I'm in shock from seeing that. All right, 10, 15, 20. You can get in the space, I'll say, you can get there? Can I not get right next? I will move. I can say you can move.

Into their combat zone. I'm okay moving into their combat zone. Five, 10, 20. That's the rest of your movement to climb over the cannon to get there? No problem. All right. That'll move that to the right. Ooh, very nice.

I feel like they're all within, yeah, 15. They're all in there. Cool, cool, cool, cool. Yep. You've moved into their combat. As a bonus action, since I, no, that was a cantrip, so I still have a, I could still use a bonus action to cast a spell.

Okay. As a bonus action, where's my bonus action spell? I'm going to do, just to help a little bit, I'm going to do Healing Word, just at level two. We're just going to do a little spruce up for Veth there. Go for it.

I'll come up. That's kind of sucks, but that's okay. 10 points of healing. That's great. So you're up 10. All right, that finishes Caduceus' turn. Veth, you're up. Caduceus moved into combat range

of the one right in front of me, as in is engaged with? Correct. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. Bye-bye! I'll just shoot him in the face. All righty. You are.

Oh, fuck, shitballs, shit. You have disadvantage on your attack roll. Oh, even worse. Okay, that is a 14 to hit. 14 hits. Yay! These guys don't have an amazing armor class. Okay.

That's pretty great. Okay, we got 10, we got 20, we got 24, we got 30 points of damage. Nice. As his tentacles wrapped around, he's like. And then you see the sucking sound from the wound as the bolt is partially withdrawn from beneath the sternum and it's just leaking this kind of

seawater-like liquid out of the wound. Gross. Reload, fire again. Go for it. Even worse, 13! Oh, and a disadvantage. Yep. 13 to hit. 13 just hits. Oh!

Look at that! There we go. Another 12 points of damage. He's looking hurt. No! Damn it! This guy. You're a dick. You got to finish your turn?

Yeah, you got no movement. All right. Goddamn it! Thank you, Caduceus. The crew's turn. Marius is going to go ahead and Lysandre goes, Foyle! And is going to attempt to strike

the guy that's next to him. Oh god, oh boy. Come on, Marius. Do something useful. Wow, really, now? Reels an 11, misses. We told him he needed a kill. We told him he needed a kill.

An eight. Literally, I think if you hadn't done that, he would've rolled better. Fucking missed with both attacks. Oh, poor Marius is terrible. I didn't do that. I'd say the charm person has worn off on this, too. The dice did that. Because Orly is no longer conscious.

Oh no. Orly is no longer conscious. Jesus. Yeah, I will say, I'll just double check real fast. Is he doing death saves at this point? Yep. I mean, not yet, but yeah. Top of his turn, his first death save.

If we lose the tortle, that's bad. It's not a concentration spell. Hey! I'll say it maintains for now, for the next hour or so. Orym, yeah. All right, so that finishes his go there. This is fucking wild. The crew is in five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30.

He sees the blade beard and he's like, what the fuck is going on? Go with it. He's going to run up onto the top here of the crate that holds all the cannonballs up there and is getting into position to attack the guy that's between Caduceus and themself. So Shelda's just up there,

but they use their action to get up there, so that's their turn. These guys need to go. I don't know what the hell's going on. Oh, man. Go off the cover. Wake up. Brush my teeth. Are any of those people Shelda?

Yeah, Shelda's the one who just hopped up on the thing and did not betray us. Oh, that's Gallant. Of course he can sleep in a deck below. Yep. Who's a pirate's life? Yep. All right, back at the top.

How do you start your spiritual weapon? Jester, you're up. I'm going to use my spiritual weapon to attack the dude that's holding Nott. You got it, go ahead and roll an attack. Oh! 23. It's a dude that's holding Nott. You got it, go ahead and roll an attack. Oh! 23. That hits.

Ooh, that's, there it is, 20 points. 20 points. As the tentacle is squeezing Veth, and you see Veth is like, in the middle of his grasp. It's not even looking up at you, it glances up at Sheldon. Ooh, I'm going to use a spiritual weapon, like a bat that's going to hit him and it's going to slam him into the blade barrier.

Okay. As it swings wide, it whacks, smacks it upside the head and the shoulder with just enough momentum to spin up over. Shelda gets down low as the tentacle unravels, spins over Shelda's back and goes right into the blade wand. She gets wood chippered against the side of your eye.

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes, yes. Sweet. I'm going to run for it as much as my movement will let me. All righty. Okay, what a mess that deck is.

I know, this is just fucking chaos in here. 20, 25. Well, I'll use some of it. I don't want to be right up next to this dude. And then I'm going to cast, what is this? At second level, I'm going to cast Guiding Volt at this guy with Yasha. Okay, go for it.

Popsicles, knives, beetles. It's Madeline. 13. 13 chestnuts. At the end of Poltergeist. Who's that? 5d6. Do it. One, two, three, four, five.

Ooh, great stuff. 11, 15, 17, 16 points. 16 points. 17, 16? Oh yeah, I totally, 18, yeah. 18 points, and then, oh! He's out. Yep. Sweet! The bolt smashes into him and falls back into the wall

and is like, looking over towards Yasha, and angrily goes to strike as the arm burns away, as the Guiding Bolt divine energy begins to tear up the side, and Angerly goes to strike as the arm burns away, as the Guiding Bolt divine energy begins to tear up the side, and as it does, you can just gently hear the laughter of the Traveler enjoying this embarrassing demise. I'm going to use the rest of my movement now to run towards the stairs as much as I can.

So we've cleared the deck? We've cleared the deck. Clear the decks! I mean, that's as far as you can get with the rest of your movement. Who's that? Is that me? Yeah, you're there. There's you and there's a guy right there

on the other side. Oh, there is a guy. Yep. Yep, there. Are you still on the ground? Yeah. I'm still lying in my bed. All right. We're all tripping over the hammocks. Jester's turn's done.

Beau, you're up. Okay, inspired by the storm and these fish fucks, I'm going to light up my lightning gloves. You got it. And after seeing a fish fuck over here take down Orly, I'm going to ignore this. I'm going to look at Marius and be like, kill him, we need to kill.

And then I'm going to go deal with this guy. This guy there? Yeah. All right, so you dart over to here, you're coming up on the edge there? Yes, I will. All right, so as you rush up to the side of that guy, go for it. I do a front flip onto the step.

Hell yeah. And then a pop pop. Hell yeah. Ah, ah, ah, ah. That's all right, that doesn't count, that doesn't count. Okay, 19 and 17, so 29 and 27. Both hit? Nice. Big rolls, damn.

Yeah, those were great. Each of these plus a nine, all right, not too bad. 10 plus 18, or 18 plus another, 23 points of damage on those two pops. 23 points of damage. Nice. A Stunning Strike. All ready. Should have done it on the first one, but.

Ooh, natural 18. Damn it. Oh, shit. Flurry of Blows. Go for it. Ba ba ba ba. Ba ba. Ooh, those were not great.

15 and 18? The 18 hits. Okay. Okay, 12. 12 points of damage. Stunning Strike. Stunning Strike. 19.

Wow! I'm rolling really good this battle. The joy. It's making me happy. And extract those aspects. Indeed. Not immune to any damage, not resistant to any damage, and not immune to any conditions. It is a free open market on this guy.

Okay, okay. Cool. Okay. That's my turn. All right. This fella up here is going to go ahead and look over the side of the ship down into the waters,

and is just going to sit there and survey the territory. That brings us to Fjord, your turn. Great. I'll use half my movement to stand up out of prone. I'm going to lean over the railing and send. As soon as you lean over, he was holding his action to Eldritch Blast you.

Oh my god. You are with the railing, you do have a bonus, you have half cover I'm giving you, so it's plus two to your AC. And the pillows. So there's a 14 that still hits. Yep. Goddamn it. I'm a four.

You take eight points of force damage. Okay. Yep. Ooh! That's your 19. Yeah, you take 10 points of force damage. Oh no! I go unconscious. And with the third and final hit. Would you not hit him?

Because he would fall prone, wouldn't he? No, it's all. It's all at once. So the third blast immediately takes away a death saving throw from you. Okay. You can go right back. He knocks unconscious and comes back.

That's true, so you're back to one hit point, and then you get hit with the last blow. So you got all your death savings. Yeah. Which is important. Just up on a crow's nest. Alone. Here's the thing. You up on a crow's nest. Alone. Here's the thing.

You said you were leaning over the railing. I need you to go ahead and roll a d20 for me. On a one to 10, you fall over the edge. On 11 or higher, you fall back into the crow's nest. Oh boy, this is bad. Eight. Oh no! No, he's dead.

Well, no. I don't really know how I would explain it. Like, fix splat. Well. No, no, no. Do you have a comment, you said? That I'm being a bit? Hmm? Nope.

No comment. Yep. Oh boy. He will fall from the top of the mast. Could go a lot of ways here. Why is he rolling damage? It's falling damage for every 10 feet. No, I know, but it's a death save. No, but there may not need to be one. If he falls higher than Fjord's hit point total,

it would all be killed. Yeah, which wouldn't happen, so it's fine. I'm just rolling it because it's fine. All right, so you impact under the wet deck of the ship. You do fail one death save. Just one? Just one. Okay, that's not terrible.

Just one. Beau just screams out at the sight of it. You hear that impact and you turn. Isn't that two because I'm already unconscious? If you know, it's only a melee attack. Yeah. Critical hit. Critical hit does two death saves. And you only get the critical hit automatically if it's a melee attack. Critical hit does two death saves. And you only get the critical hit automatically

if it's a melee attack next to them. I just scream my head off and I just scream, Fjord! All righty. Can we hear it? Did we hear that below that? Yeah, you did. You baited me into that. I instantly drop my blade barrier. You drop the blade barrier?

Mm-hmm. We'll say on your turn, it'll drop. All right, Yasha, you're up. Okay, seeing that everything's done down here, I'm going to run up the stairs. Okay, you run this way. The guy who's behind the inside of the barrier does a pack of Opportunity on you.

Wait, up the, okay. Oh, there's one left. There was a guy in here? Right there. Oh, there's one left. Oh, I see. Oh, none of us could see that guy. Okay, whatever. Oh, I didn't know there was another guy. That's okay. Do you just want to keep going

or do you want to stay and fight him? I heard a scream. Did we hear that? Yeah. Yeah, you heard a scream. Okay, I'm going to start running upstairs. Okay. It will take an attack of opportunity. Can't do nothing to you anyway.

That's fine. A few hits. That's going to be a 17. Yeah, it just hits. Fuckers. All right. That's going to be a 17? Yeah, it just hits. Fuckers. All right. That's awesome. You take Levy of the Poisoned Quill, so that would be nine points of poison damage.

And you can make a constitution saving throw for me. Yeah. 27. Yeah, you're fine. Okay. Okay, calm. As you emerge outside, immediately there next to you, you see one of the quilled sea spawn creatures right there. Like. Okay.

So I see... You don't see, you can barely see Fjord's hand just past where the mast hits the deck. Would the sword have disappeared immediately when he went unconscious, or would it still be out? No, the sword still out there. Okay.

Yeah, it was Fjord. So as soon as I get up there, I see Fjord laying on the ground. I unleash a battle cry. So, within 60 feet, who can hear you? Gain advantage on attack rolls and saving throws. Yes. Yes.

And I will attack this guy in front of me. Go for it. So you have advantage on the attack rolls. Okay. And you have advantage on, and you and Orly both have advantage on saving throws. Does that apply to an unconscious person? No, you can't hear. Hmm?

I'd say probably no. The battle card isn't effective when you're unconscious. 18. 18 hits. Okay. Oh shit, that doesn't work, because you can't hear it. Sorry, panic thought. It's good for us, though. Good thought, good thought. I mean, I think we heard you can hear it. Sorry, panic, thought. It's good for us, though. Good thought, good thought.

I mean, I think we heard you down. 17. Yeah. Much better. 26 points of damage. 26 points of damage. All right, so that was two attacks? That was one attack. One attack, nice. Second attack.

All right, the first attack breaks the charmed person at Orlean Castle. Oh shit, he was charmed. We wouldn't have known that. I wouldn't have known that. You do, however, as you strike with a melee attack, the quills on its back deals five points of piercing damage to you, reduce to two. Okay.

Do I make a second attack? Natural 20. Woo! Yo. Oh! Yo. Oh! Ugh. It doesn't matter. So five, uh, two, 18 points of damage.

And roll the extra. That's the dice doubled, right? That was the dice doubled. And then roll your Brutal Critical, the additional d6. Additional d6, okay, okay. Plus four. So 20? Yeah.

No, no. 22. 22, yeah. Because it was 18. Oh, sorry, it was 18. Yeah, yeah. So 22. He's really hurt. You do take another two points of piercing damage. That's five, but reduced from the quills

as you strike with each melee attack. Okay. And it spins on you in your direction. Okay. All right. That finishes your turn, Yasha? Yes. Okay. Yes. All right, it is now the sea spawn's turn.

As the guy was looking over the edge on his turn, off to the side of the ship. Just keep everyone for one more round. I'm incapacitated, so that Hexblade's curse goes away also. Gotcha. Goddamn it. All I need is just, I can do this.

That thing, what was it? Two of them climb back up on the edge of the ship. That's what he was looking at off the side. Oh my god. Asshole. It's hot. This guy's going to up there, and this guy's going to dart over towards Yasha.

Are you just going to take cover? No, I don't know. The one against you, Beauregard. Kill these head dicks. Yep. That's going to be an 18. Miss. I think it's dickheads.

14. Miss. And with its quills, your immune to it. Yeah. Against you, Yasha, it's going to be an attack. 17? Yep. 11. Nope. And with its tentacle, it's 22.

Okay. Okay, so you take... Yep, nope, okay. Three points of bludgeoning damage. Okay. And then from the tentacle, which does grapple you, oof, you take 14 points of bludgeoning damage

reduced to seven. Grappled by that guy. Goddamn, I just have to get out of there. I just have to get out. The guy you just attacked, who's really hurt, turns around and is going to go ahead and attempt to strike at you as well. That is 15, so that's a miss.

18, that's a hit. And the tentacle, whoo, that's another 24. All right, so you take five points of bludgeoning damage. Then from the other tentacle, that's going to be 11 points, so another five points of bludgeoning damage, and then from the other tentacle, it's going to be 11 points, so another five points of bludgeoning damage. The one over there, it's with Marius.

It's going to go ahead and attack him three times. That's a miss. Wow, a miss. Marius is like, I'm being all dodgy suddenly. Yeah. And a miss? Well, like a three and a four, then a four. Marius is like, woo, ha, try me, bitch!

No impact there. All right, and the one down there that is currently in base to base with you guys is going to go ahead and... You're the one on the ground still, so it's going to go after you. Takes damage at the start of his turn. That's true, yes, you're right, you're right. So save is...

That's a failure on the save. That's, let's see, 12, 14 points of radiant damage. 14 points of radiant damage? Yeah, he went through the blade barrier, so. Oh, that'll do it. Yeah! So it doesn't even tag a, it goes, turns towards Jester, and as it does, the beetles just swarm over it. You hear the,

and then as the beetles scatter away, you see the dull bones beneath that are bending, cartilage-like. I like your beetles. Like a princess. Yeah. All righty. That finishes their turn. Caleb, you're up.

Caleb looks down the entire length of the boat, and this is terrible, he pulls out a raven's feather and waves his hand in the air and casts Fly on himself. Okay. And he is going to move quickly this way and out one of the same holes that the sea spawn came in. Sea spawn. There's a knife wall there.

No, I thought it dropped. I'm going. Not yet. It's going to drop on my turn. Correct, so you have to go out this way. Yeah. If you want to. I will say, make a general strength check for me. Strength check.

It is 12. Okay, so yeah. So you get just outside of that gunport hole there. That's as far as I can go. I can't get up and see that? What's your fly speed? 60 feet. Oh, 60, okay. Sorry, I thought that was 30.

So then that'll get you, let's see. Sneeze long. Yeah. Right. There's the boy. That's a flying wizard. Right there? Is equally, or? Yeah, that's fine, right there.

That's it, it's into my turn. All right. Just Doctor Strange-ing. Yeah. With his dramatic music. Yeah, yeah. La la! That brings us to this fella's turn.

Ooh. Ooh, dude. He is going to go ahead and watch his jaws. Fuck, fuck, fuck, no! What the hell? Squeaches out because he hasn't done it yet. I need everybody to go ahead and make a wisdom saving card for me, please. One, two, let me have it.

What happens if you get stunned when you're dropping the ocean? Oh, Jesus. Maybe? No? Oh fuck, that's awesome. So, Fjord? Oh, no, Fjord. 12. 12 stun. No! Oh, wait, wait, wait.

We have advantage because of Battlecry, right? We do, yeah, roll again. Hang on, hang on. Even worse. Even worse, 12. All right, yeah. Roll again. Hang on, hang on. Even worse. Even worse, 12. All right, stun. 16. 16, you succeed. 11.

Stun. No! It's a frightened condition by any chance. I'm not. 24. You're fine. I'm fine, I'm fine. I rolled an 11. 17. 17, you guys are fine?

Rest of the crew here. Can't get out of this goddamn hammock. Marius. Marius succeeds. Hey, Marius! Good! Marius is too big for that. The two other crew, we have Shelda. Oh, did he kill again? Fails.

Shelda is stunned down below in the deck. You still trying? I'm trying real hard. Oh, and Galen succeeds, all right. Finishing that. You can't do shit when you're stuck. You're just stuck, you're just there. Incapacitated, can't move, can speak falteringly.

And he's going to go ahead and move. No, no, no, no. People have advantage on you when they attack. Oh. 50, 25, I'll say to get up there. It was past Stunned Bow and darts and clambers over the edge of the ship to go ahead and get back up onto the back deck there.

All right, that finishes his go. Caduceus and Veth. Veth, you are stunned. Roll Acis. I'm going to take my full movement to get up. Are there two? Full movement to get up. Are there two? Full movement to get up. All right.

30. Two, three. You can't get out because Yasha is Double my movement. But you can go out that one. Are there two? There's two stairs. Yeah.

So instead we can go. Okay. Well, no, this goes below that. Oh. Oh. Yeah, Y, this goes below deck. Oh. Oh. So this, yeah, Yasha's right there in the way. And you know what? I'll say you can pass through if you want to and come out on this side.

Okay. Do I still have, I'm going to, can I see everybody? You can see, you can see most everybody. Okay. Save the day, Caduceus! Save the day, Caduceus!

Trying to figure out, everyone's within 60 feet, right? Yeah. Okay, and I can see even the unconscious people from where I am? Okay. You had to use your action to get up here, by the way. I know. Yeah. Is that my full movement, or?

I'd say you can probably get one more there. All right, I'm going to cast as my bonus action, watch this shit. Where did my bonus action go? I'm too far, hold on. Not healing. Actually, as a point, because you did move into Yasha's space in this way,

that guy does get an attack of opportunity against you. Oh, because I moved into the space? Because you moved through Yasha's space to get through there. So you get an attack on you. That is a 21 to hit. That hits. You take... That would be nine points of bludgeoning damage. Whatever. And you are grappled. I can still cast and do shit like that?

Yeah, you can still cast when you're ready. I'm still cast, but grappling? It's a little weird here. This is the problem. You moved out of the space. Oh, if I didn't move, I mean, he would have stopped me from moving any further than where I am moved out of the space. Oh, if I didn't move, I mean, he would have stopped me from moving any further than where I am, so I'm still.

No, because as soon as you left, he would have triggered the attack, which would have kept you in that space, but Yasha's already occupying it. Oh, then. So would you be up against Yasha? So you'd be back in the hallway, like right behind Yasha.

Because to be grappled, you have to be near him. Can I see the deck from where I am? From where you are, you can see the deck. You would be essentially right here. Cool. Right behind Yasha, and you can look out of the deck. Can I see Orly? No.

Can I see Fjord? No, because you're still below deck. Goddamn. I'm not level enough? Like his head is not above? Your head is up, but right now. I am tall. You are pretty tall.

It's finicky. Based on this is in the way, technically, of the spaces, and you are in the stairs behind Yasha and this other guy there, I'll say roll a perception check with disadvantage. That's fair. We'll go with this. Roll a perception, Matt. That's 19. 19? go with this. I'm on perception, man. That's 19.

19? Yeah, I'll say yes. Yes! Oh, man. I'll say you cannot see orally, but you can see forward. And I'm rolling my, do I roll my constitution save for my concentration spell now or later? You do. You get advantage.

Yeah. That's 17. 17, okay. Yes, I'm going to, okay, and now. That's kind of where it's happening. Yep, yep, that's fine. Now I'm going to cast as my bonus action, Lord, where is it, where is it?

Mass Healing Word. Mass Healing Word, nice. Mass Healing Word at level four. So everyone within, every friendly within 60 feet, who I can see, hold on, gets, if you're unconscious, weight. Wait, you can see? Everybody within 60 feet that I can see gets.

You can see Veth, too, right? No, no. Jeez. No, just above that. Six gets 11 hit points. 11 hit points to you, Fjord. No, Fjord, because he's unconscious, gets 13. Right, that's max. And Orly also gets 13. That's true.

Orly! Yes. Thank you very much. And Caleb gets, yes. That was getting hairy. I'm at full. All right. But thank you. Fuck my life. Thank you very much. And Caleb gets a fix. That was getting hairy. I'm at full. All right. But thank you. Fuck my life. Thank you.

That was awesome. That was some finicky stuff, and you did well. That was great. All righty, finishing Caduceus' turn. Veth, you're stunned. Yep. The crew, stunned. He's going to go and move. What's going on upstairs?

Ferdie, what the fuck? So yeah, you're conscious. Oh god, there's going to go and move. What's going on upstairs? About 30. What the fuck? So yeah, you're conscious. Oh god, there's blades all over my face! What the fuck, what, Jesus Christ! I did it, I avoided the stairs. I would say. Take him down.

No, Gal-Galin, Gal-Galin. No, Gal-Galin rolled high enough to where he was like, shit, and didn't get a bunch more axe wounds to the face. But that's the end of his turn, though. All right, Jester, you're up. I can't get upstairs because they're just blocking everything. Yep.

Mm. This is stupid. Sorry, it's traffic jam. Sorry. I know, but it's going to use up all my, it's an action to do it. I'm going to drop Blade Barrier, it's an action to do it. I'm going to drop Blade Barrier so I don't set off any sparks. All right.

Except for the last thing. The ones that I've been doing. Thankfully, all the gunpowder is here. I'm going to... I got a question. Yeah? With my spiritual weapon, since it's not actually corporeal, can I float it up and through the ceiling with its 20 movement?

You still have to be able to see where it's going. Okay. If I use my action to dimension door. Then I would allow you to Dimension Door. Then I would allow you to move it up to the floor because it is ethereal. Okay, then I'm going to use my action to Dimension Door. Okay. I don't know what's going on above deck,

so I'm going to bamf up to here. All right. Then I'm going to use my spiritual weapon, I'm going to move it up through. It comes up to about right where Fjord is. As far as placement there. Can it hit anything? It can move over here and hit this guy, if you'd like.

Okay, yeah. The last of his movement. Go for it. That hits. 26. 26, yeah, it does. 15 points. 15 points. Of serrated lollipop damage. Ginsu lollipop.

Which it does, it shreds the creature. Okay. Is taking a health potion an action or a bonus action? We usually consider it as a bonus action. We'll go with it. All right, that finish your turn? All right, Jester's done. Beau? It's done. It's done?

All right, it is this guy's turn now. Just me and Shelda. Which one, the cat? The angry guy up there. This cat, right? Yep. He is very... He's going to leap down, make an acrobatics check. Just cocked.

Yeah, he's fine. Does he seem cool, but it's like, well, he just jumped out in the fracas. Yeah, I know. Watching the healing spell go out there and looking down at it, all of a sudden, the rising center just gets angry and, as opposed to staying in the back

and watching from a distance, pulls out, the Sword of Fathoms, leaps down and walks right up to Fjord on the ground. Oh god, dad! Because you are prone, has advantage on the ground. Oh god! God damn it. No. Because you are prone, has advantage on the attacks. Oh boy. So first.

You got 13 air points. First, it's going to attempt to bite you. It's a natural 20. Wait, he can bite home? He's biting you while you're on the ground. That means he has to lean forward with his mouth and be like. Yep. Very romantic. Yeah.

How far away is Fjord? Fjord is about 25 feet from you. I'll cancel that. Okay. Yes! Great cleric, great cleric. I was not going to help that much, but. It's something.

That is going to bring us to nine points of piercing damage. Okay. Hey! Its first attack with the Sword of Feathers. It's going to be a 15 to hit. Why don't you have any armor on? Stabbed me in the chest while I was sleeping. You didn't sleep with your armor on?

I guess not. Always sleep with your armor on. Technically, you weren't sleep with your armor on? I guess not. Always sleep with your armor on. Technically, you weren't sleeping with your armor on. We totally forgot what we were calculating, your armor and stuff. So technically, you should have taken a lot more damage. But that's fine. I always sleep with my armor on, so.

Okay, that means you also wake up with exhaustion points every morning. Okay, I don't always do that. I made some mistakes in there, not considering the fact that all of you guys should have no armor on. It's a lot, it's a lot. It's a lot, it's a lot. It's a lot, it's a lot.

That's my bad. But you know what? That's fine. I'll just give myself a few more bonuses here on their end to even it out. Okay. All right. Ooh, boy.

You take 14 points of slashing damage. I am unconscious. And four points psychic. You are unconscious. Hits you with an auto-critical, you immediately lose two death saving throws. Oh! Two down.

So you only get that relentless endurance thing once a day? Once a day. All right, that finishes his turn. You see how it's jamming the blade into Fjord's chest as Fjord screams out and he goes unconscious and is digging into his sternum with the blade like he's trying to carve a watermelon. Pulled out a health potion and it's like,

just sat on my hand. All right, Fjord, Fjord, it's your turn. Take, take, take. You should make a death saving throw for me. Oh, this is it. Oh, I hate this! Yeah, this is the worst. Hello. All right, that's a success. Oh shit. Oh, I hate this! Yeah, this is like the worst.

Hello. All right, that's a success. Oh my god! That's a success. Yasha, your turn. 11. Too stressful. Okay. You are grappled and you are in melee

with two of those guys. Yeah, yeah, okay, so porcupine guy, is he the one who's grappling me? Technically, no, it's this guy here that just got me in front of you. All right. Okay, I will attack. Can I try to get out of the grapple?

Porcupine guy has the tentacle or they both do? There's no porcupine guy here, they're both tentacle. They're both tentacle, or they both do? There's no porcupine guy here. They're both tentacle. They're both tentacle. Okay, got it. So I will attack the guy to the left first, I guess. Or well, you said the guy on the right is grappling me? Mm-hmm. Okay, so I'm going to try to get out of that.

Yep, go for it. Okay. This is an attack, or this is a? You're burning max amount of calories right now. This is a, well, are you trying to break out of it? Yeah. Break out of attack. Some chocolate covers it. I'll attack. Up to you. Yeah, yeah, I'll attack.

That's cocked, but I forgot I was going to go reckless, so just in case. I'm glad I did that. Okay, so you're going reckless. Ooh, both bad. That case you're going reckless. Ooh! Both bad. That was, well, 14? Hits. Okay. So first attack. Oh, boysy. Seven. Savage attacker.

Did we get better? Yeah, that's better. All right. 20 points total for the first hit. Okay. Okay. Second hit. That's good. 19. 19 does hit. Okay.

Check on the last hit. 15 points of damage. 15, all right, you didn't hurt. But he's still standing. Okay. Is that your turn? I don't want to get it back. Yes.

Okay. It's my fucking turn. Yasha's done. It's now. Wait, wait, wait, sorry, sorry, sorry. I'm going to move a little bit. You can't, you're grappled. I'm on a move. I'm fucking grappled, it's not. Wait, wait, wait, sorry, sorry, sorry. I'm going to move a little bit. You can't, you're grappled. I'm on a move. I'm fucking grappled.

Goddamn it. At the top of their turn, they take damage. Yes, they do. So go ahead and roll that. I told you I wasn't going to. Fail on his end, and come on. Both fail. Oh yeah, that's nice.

Oh yeah. Fuck, I can't count. 17. All the other armadas. 21 points of radiant damage to everyone in that fucking circle. That you choose. Except, yeah, I'll make 21 points to anybody I don't like. Both of them just immediately are lifted off their feet

as the swarm of celestial beetles just consumes them in the middle of the air, leaving their weird, floppy, almost cartilage-like skeletons to hit the ground. This is killing. Caduceus is doing it. You're no longer grappling with that. Nope.

You're doing it, Caduceus, you're doing it. You're saving him, you're saving him. Oh my god, save him! Oh my god. All righty. This guy here is going to go ahead and leap past. Man, being stunned sucks. And is going to go ahead and attack Fjord.

Oh! Oh, but that's not good. It's not a crit. Well, I only had one death save left, so yeah. The creature has its blade in its chest, staring off to the side. It gives a look towards one of the spine guys who had climbed over the edge.

It leaps down onto the ground, puts its hands on the blade, the Sword of Fathoms as well, and pushes down as it stabs all the way through Fjord's chest. The breath leaves his mouth. Whoops. All right. We got diamonds, right?

Beauregard. Caleb, it's your turn. You just became the captain. Thinking about the conversation I had with Fjord just yesterday, I drag dust up my arm and point my hand at the head one and cast Disintegrate. Oh shit. Yes! All righty. Two, three, four, five, six,

eight, nine, 10. Like the ocean IRS. Is dex saving throw for that? Three, yeah. They will find you. They will come collect you. 67. Ooh.

Oh, natural four, that's a fail. 67 points of damage. That's a lot. Kill him. All right, so as it blasts, the ice that still encases his chest is scattered away, and you watch as the sickly green glow of the beam impacts and watch as parts of its fleshy body begin to turn to dust and it backs away,

and it withdraws the blade from the gaping wound in Fjord's chest. It's took an damage. Not dead. This guy's barely been hit. It's all bad. I would like to have a... Two here.

Are you super stunned still? Until these guys' turns are over. Because it ends on their turn. DMD Beyond, it now says dead next to my name. Oh my god! How did that happen? It's in parentheses, it says dead! In front of it, so it's just like dead. Oh god.

So look, easy DMD Beyond. Dang. Take it easy, guys. There you go, Caleb. I missed one point. I missed a die. Okay. Is he dead?

No. One point, d3. All right, cool. Finishing Caleb's turn. It's now this guy's turn, the stun wears off. Uka, tell regard. At the end of his turn, but just keep it in. Immediately start crying.

All right. Stunned and couldn't do shit while my friend died. Soft fight, soft fight. This guy's going to leap down and attempt to attack Orly three times. Is he still in my range? Yeah, Orly didn't get his move, his thing, did he? No, not yet.

Is he in my range? So it's going to take a sword attack. Is he in my range? Is it? He's still stunned until the end of his turn, I believe. Yeah, he's in his turn. Let me double check. Until the end of its next turn, yeah. So it hits Orly with its sword for...

Orly is unconscious. And has two more attacks. I'm just going to kill Orly, too. It's a hit. Yeah, just that. So after it slices Orly, and Orly falls on the ground, it jumps on top, takes the blade, and jams it from the side of the shell

through the armpit and inside Orly's torso, and it. Then twists on the inside, and Orly just goes limp. Oh no! Pulls the blade out. Gills, like. Have we ever had two gills? Not like...

And we're not even near done. We haven't really touched these fuckers. I'm still lying in bed. There's two guys left? There's two big guys left. Are there any little guys left? I've not been able to get out of bed. Yes.

You can share the bed. Little guy right here. Okay, I think we're just together with that. A little guy, a psycho guy, and a... I'm just like, we got to see this little guy. Caduceus, you're up. Veth, you as well. What? What's that? You're up next after Kasey.

I'm going to take my movement as close to Fjord as I can get. Okay. Is that guy still alive? You can get right next to Fjord. All right. Where are Grog's hit points now? I miss them every day.

And I'm going to... You went down this grog, but you can probably run through like a river. Orly's out, right? Orly and Fjord are both dead. Okay, that's cool. I'm going to cast... Is it going to kill you?

Who? No, I'm just figuring it out. His one job, his one job. Is that an adventure, guys? It's not what he is, it's what he can. I'm going to cast, who's the biggest problem right now? The dude that just like... I mean, there's the one guy that killed four.

I'll do. Seems to be visually the most, kind of the leader. They're all looking and taking cues from this individual. He's the most pinpointed up. He just had Arvavac at the speed of his spell. Are both people with the... There's one with Balchion. Are they both men? Was he the one that Caleb just hit?

I can't tell a gender. It's hard to tell gender. Okay. Are you doing a few dices? I'm going to cast Blight. How far away am I from this? Oh, like 10 feet. Okay. Blight against the main guy?

I'm going to cast Blight at a fifth level against the main guy. I just put you on my water bottle. That is a natural 18. Motherfucker. Doesn't get a bonus. Doesn't get, oh no, plus four, so it would be 22. Okay.

Still takes half damage. Okay, here we go. Half damage is fine. Are we still doing advantage on attacks and saving? Nope, that faded. This sucks. My turn's done. 12, 17. Oh, we went off a round.

Should I kill? Do the same thing. Gosh, that's gross. I rolled wrong, hold on, I'm sorry. I was rolling wrong, I'm so sorry, one second, because I'm having a mild conniption. All right, this'll do it. Nice and cozy, just listening to the rain.

Roll a six. 11, 12, plus 14 is, please help, is third? No. 12 plus 14. 14 is, please help, is third? No. 12 plus 14. 14 is 26. 26, and then 26, 29. 44 points of necrotic damage. Wow.

It takes 22 at the first hit, so. As you see the moisture pull out of the body and the gray areas, all of a sudden the veins darken and the jaw turns gray on one side and goes limp. As he goes. Starting to look hurt. Starting to look hurt. Yeah, as a bonus action. Can I do this as a bonus action? Let's see.

Where are we? What are you doing? Never mind. I'm getting out of bed. There you go. That's half my movement. Use the other half to go upstairs. Bonus action to turn invisible. Then you have your action.

Bonus action to dash. So yeah, you emerge right next to Yasha, right there in the middle of the ship. Do I see any enemies, and are any of them engaged in a combat scenario? No, that won't do. Currently? Yes, because they're both next to Beauregard,

so you can see both. The main guy has half cover. The other guy here does not. I will go for the one without half cover. Go for it. And fire. I will cast Brenatto's

crossbow. And fire my crossbow. Okay. Shit! 16! 16 against 10 hits. Oh! Ooh. Okay, that's something.

Okay, 14, 23, 29 points of damage. Oh man, he's looking real bad. Ah! You see as he tries to pull it out, all the, like on the barb end of it, it pulls some internal organ and viscera with it. It's like, ah!

Throws it on the ground, it spatters that weird clear fluid. That's all I got. All right, top of the round, Jester, you're up. I'm going to bring my spiritual weapon and slam it in the back of the head. Of the main guy? Yeah. Go for it, roll for an attack.

22. 22 hits. Come on! Nine points. Nine points of damage. 22. 22 hits. Come on! Nine points. Nine points of damage. He takes the hit. At the same time, I'm going to, is he looking rough, did you say? He's starting to look hurt, yeah.

At 5th-level, I'm going to shoot my hand forward, then I'm going to cast Guiding Bolt. Okay, go for it. Roll for an attack. 25. 25? That definitely hits. Wow. More fifth-level. Ooh. Ooh!

Yep. 10, 15. 19, 21. And then three more. Three more? 21, 27, 29, 32 points of radiant damage. 32 points of radiant damage? Yeah. Okay.

Got it, so blasts him, you can see now, it's starting to show some real hurt, and now his body is glittering. Yes. You got it. Who did you hit? Did you hit the wound? The big guy.

On top of Fjord? Yeah. Okay. Are you going to move position? It doesn't, I mean, I'm going to run forward to the edge of the... To the edge of? Can I jump down so I can see? How far can I get?

You can get from there. Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, you can get there. No, I'll get about there. Okay. God, it's just so much chaos in here. I know, isn't it? All right, it's your turn. I don't think I want to.

Beau, you're up. You good? Beau is furious and is going to revert back to 18-year-old barroom brawl Beau, and she's going to leap on the back of this fuck that killed Fjord. Nice pull. You got it. And grab him by the front of his face

and just fucking pummel him in the fucking face. Yeah! Do it, do it. Just like that crazy bitch just on his back. Fucking banjo playing. 26. That hits. Stunning strike. Immune to stun. He's immune to stun? That one is?

Because I did the thing. It's a different creature, different stat set. Roll damage. How many things just popped on her head? There's a couple of chuffer cracks over here. 15 spine, spinal trunks. 11. Luer's spinal trunk. 11. Lures his hand and just falls off.

All right. Yep. Roll a job. Roll credits roll. Roll her damage. All right. In the Dwarven Forge came. Second pop, 26 again.

26, all right. Eight damage. Eight points of damage already. And then, oh, I had advantage on that first one, right? Yes, you did. Yeah. So roll just to see if it's critical. Nope. Okay.

And flurry of blows for this guy. Pop, pop. Just full on, that was capped. Okay, 25 and 19. Yeah! Go fit. Roll damage. Killer. Ooh, ooh, ooh! Double eights!

16 plus 12. Whoa! What is that? 16, 28, 30, 30! 30, he's hurting. Wait, 28. 28, 16 plus? 18 plus 12? Yeah. 30.

30, he's still standing? Yeah. Fuck. Tough one. Does that finish your turn, Beau? Yeah. Okay. It's now his turn. He takes damage. No, I did 30 damage.

Yes, top of the turn. Oh, good, good, good, good, good. That is a 19. That does make his zo so he takes half damage. That's pretty good, that's okay. Six, seven, eight, nine. 14. 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, so half.

That's seven points of damage. You got it. Radiant damage. Did you add anything? Did you add anything to the tree? Nothing to add. Seven points there. And half movement for whenever inside the circle is happening.

Got it, all right. So it's going to turn to the others and go, No! And you start speaking in a language that I don't think any of you understand. Is it magical? No. No. Not this statement.

Is it deep space? And then it reaches down, no, it does not, grabs Fjord by the chest. Don't you fucking do that. And is going to attempt to Dimension Door. Counterspell. Yes! Fourth level. forward by the chest. Don't fucking do that. And is going to attempt to Dimension Door. Count to spell. Yes! Fourth level. And does not go anywhere. Oh my god.

Well, no, because it is a fifth level spell because it's a warlock, so you do still have to roll. Okay. Oh god! Ooh! Okay. It's all fifth level slots as a warlock, so roll. What am I doing here?

You're rolling against. You're rolling and I've're rolling, and I've. D10 plus this, plus this spell's level. And it's my. So D10. And I add my modifier, right? Correct, your intelligence modifier. 17.

He does not move. It goes ahead and you watch as this purple energy begins to rise. This dark ocean begins to swell up around the two of them, and as it releases the incantation to slam the ground, Caleb, flying up, sends his hands down and this wave of this net, this spiraling net of arcane runes

grapples around and shatters the growing doorway. Suddenly, it's like, looks up angrily at you. Oh god. It's going toly at you. Oh god. It's going to try and move. Half speed. Half speed with Fjord. You do have your reaction. Yes, I do. Make your attack. Kick his ass.

Am I within five of them range to make a reaction? We sound good. No. 16, I think, hits. 16, no, 17 is his armor class. Kick his ass, Bob! He's going to go ahead and... I'm going to look this way. Half speed? Oh man, that half speed is fucking nuts.

Plus he's dragging Fjord, so... Yeah, so he only gets over to here. Does Marius get an attack? No, technically he's in. Please, leave my fate to Marius. I will help you! I'll help the boat! Yeah, now that half speed and then drag,

yeah, that's as far as he gets. Trying to drag Fjord up on the edge because he has no other options. Fucking Counterspell. My bane. Yeah, he is. All right. Yasha, he is. All right. Yasha, your turn. Yasha!

So I'm going to, can I get to him? Yeah, you can get over. Rushing past through Caduceus. You can come around this way, or you can go up on the edge of the boat. Up to you. I'll just come around this way. Okay, so you come around this way.

Okay, so. Dragging Fjord's lifeless corpse up towards the lip of the boat, getting ready to jump into the ocean. Okay. Because you've got the fucking pistol! 22. No, I don't.

Yeah, you do. Yeah, you do. You've still got an orb and you go. Yeah, there was two. One fell out. There's still there was two. One fell out. There's still one in there. One in the sword. Well, the sword was symbolic of you having it. Yeah.

Oh. I thought you had one. 22? 22 hits. Okay. The balls! Seven, eight. You roll Savage Attacker.

It's all done. That's the save, okay. Five, six, seven, eight. Oh no, eight, that was better. 18 for the first hit. How do you want to do it? Yes! Okay, okay, so he has a tentacle, yeah?

No tentacle, he's just like a giant clawed hand and dragging Fjord by the chest wound up towards the edge of the ship. Okay, I want to do a black widow wrap around his neck. Yeah! And then I want to just pull his head back so his neck breaks. Ooh, nice.

And then I want to take his body, throw it over the side, and wrap his claw around a belaying pin, so he's a warning for anybody else who would try to climb the ship. You snap the neck, you throw the body over, and because the bones are weirdly flexible, you take and wrap it around, and the arm actually bends

and wraps as it breaks in the same way and dislodges at all the joints. You take it and you wrap it in, and he's now damning off the ship, the rain pouring. Okay, and then where's Fjord at this point? Fjord is on the ground right next to you, just slumped there. Is there still another guy?

Yeah, there is, there's another guy. You got your axe at me. Do you have another attack? I do have another attack, okay. But he's on the ship. Fjord is on the ship. He's next to me, right there. Okay, so the other guy, I'll take an attack on him.

And you get there? Or well, yeah, where is he? There's a tortoise. Right there, that guy is. Oh, that guy there? That guy right there. This is a guy by bow. Oh.

By bow and a guy right there. Oh, there's two guys. Two guys, yeah. There's two guys. Okay. Whoever I can get to from there, because I can't quite see. Yep, there's the guy right there.

Okay, okay. Guardian, sir. Got it. Yeah, okay, same. So 22. 22, okay. Does that hit? That does hit, yes.

Okay. 13 points of damage. 13 points of damage, got it. Oh, this is so stressful. Okay. Finishes Yasha's go. It's now his turn. He's going to go ahead and flee.

It's going to attempt to run. Can I get attack on two of these? And also start his dice, yep. What a squad. What a squad. Make your save. Fails a save. That's 16 points of radiant damage, and you still have speed. Yep.

And I hit him with a 19. Yep. With my axe. So go ahead and roll damage. I have an axe! Yasha, you can take an opportunity as well. Yes! You do the additional damage, too, because. Yeah, because of the poison thing.

Yep. It's 27. How much extra damage? Yeah, because of the poison thing. Yep. Six points, how much extra? 27. That hits, roll damage. Six points. 14 points of damage. 14 points of damage, nice. 15. Yeah, no, he tries to run and just kicks us. He's like.

Fucking ginsu from every which way. Caleb, you're up. Who's still alive? The one guy right there. The other big fuck. Big one. Stunner, the stunner. He's almost dead, though.

Yeah, so Caleb just pulls out his adder stomach and draws it back like it's a bow and releases Melph's Acid Arrow at 5th-level. All right. Are you sure it's not Widogast's Acid Arrow? No, it's another famous wizard. Yeah! Power play. There are two.

Is it a dexterity save or a spell save? It's dex. Dex. That is a natural two. Go ahead and roll damage. Four plus an additional for everything above two, so another three. Make it hurt. That's a four, eight, 12.

That's good. It is good. 16, 19. How'd you want to do this? 19, 21. How'd you want to do this, Caleb? 19, 21. As he's turning to try and jump off the ship. Yeah, and as he's turning,

a beam of green arcane energy shoots straight through the back of his head and then just starts to melt down and melts a line down through his head, down through his neck, down through his chest. Runs towards the edge and then just slumps over the side and you watch as the body slowly

melts in the middle of it and just slops to the side and you watch as the body slowly melts in the middle of it and just slops to the ground in two halves. I will use my movement to fly and drop right down by Fjord's body and check him. Here we are. So wait, we're fully and Fjord dead? Yeah.

As you all, I'm shaking. As you all standing in the pouring rain here, on the deck of your ship. Sorry. I need to get some rain sounds. You've got to have some rain sounds. It's important. You've got to have them.

The drama. You all independently walk up to see there, in scattered pools of blood, unmoving, the dead bodies of Fjord and Orly, the storm still flashing overhead, the thunder still roaring. In the middle of this moonless night, none of the other armada ships, as far as you know,

are aware of what transpired here. It sinks in. What had happened, possibly why, and what needs to hopefully be done to rectify it. And that's where I'm going to end tonight's episode. Oh! Wow. Oh shit, we went late.

I'm so sorry. Oh fucking. I was in pain just at the time. Wow. Oh no, I feel really bad. What a thrill, Rhett. Well, we're the ones RPing halfway through the promo. No, it's great, man.

No, no, no, it's good. We need to check on play the first hour. I'm glad this happened here and not in Chicago. Mm. Mm. Wow. This map was out. I know, I know. Well, these were the things he was crafting, I think.

Those are the things I was building in secret in the hotel room. I have the third orb still in me, it wasn't in the sword, it was just representative of what's in my chest. The way he was attacking you seemed to be continuously going for the chest. Keep digging. Where you had placed all the orbs into you.

That imagery with Yasha and the Fjord dream before everything went wrong was amazing. What I loved was you were watching Yasha have the dream and I looked over and you were like, thank god it's not me. 100%. It's so hard, but it's like I know over and you were like, thank god it's not me. 100%. It's so hard when it's like, I know it is. I was like, oh, I hate it when it's this good.

Yeah, we were like, this is so hard when it's on you. You try to not make eye contact with Vim, I was like, oh god. Yeah, wow. So much pressure. So much pressure. Great game. Great game, guys.

But Vim thought you have to do it within a minute and it's going to be a whole week. Been two rounds. No. It's been two rounds. No. It's been two rounds. It's only 12 rounds. We've got time. I also, I actually have spells that can, yeah, there's stuff, there's stuff.

There's stuff. There's stuff. I have a lot of stuff. Just nobody trip on the way over, okay? Oh no, I stepped forward again! All right, we'll pick up here next Thursday. Thank you guys so much for sticking with us. Have a wonderful night. We love you very much, and is it Thursday yet?

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