Critical Role - C3E72 Phantasmal Parley

Episode Date: September 21, 2023

Bells Hells engage with a cursed pirate ship filled with ghosts, seeking passage across the waters of the Shattered Teeth, but a parley is not easily granted... Twitch subscribers gain instant access to VODs of our shows like Critical Role, Exandria Unlimited, and 4-Sided Dive. But don't worry: Twitch broadcasts will be uploaded to YouTube about 36 hours after airing live, with audio-only podcast versions of select shows on Spotify, Apple Podcasts & Google Podcasts following a week after the initial air date. Twitch subscribers also gain access to our official custom emote set and subscriber badges and the ability to post links in Twitch chat! "It's Thursday Night (Critical Role Theme Song)" by Peter Habib and Sam RiegelOriginal Music by Omar Fadel and Hexany Audio"Welcome to Marquet" Art Theme by Colm McGuinnessAdditional Music by Universal Production Music, Epidemic Sounds, and 5 AlarmCharacter Art by Hannah Friederichs Due to the improv nature of Critical Role and other RPG content on our channels, some themes and situations that occur in-game may be difficult for some to handle. If certain episodes or scenes become uncomfortable, we strongly suggest taking a break or skipping that particular episode.Your health and well-being is important to us and Psycom has a great list of international mental health resources, in case it’s useful: http://bit.ly/PsycomResources

Once upon a time, a group of curious storytellers breathed life into epic tales set in the wide fantasy world of Exandria. This is Liam O'Brien, here to welcome you to Critical Role. We'll dive into the story in just a moment, but first, a few notes. This is the audio-only version of our broadcast that streams Thursdays at 7pm Pacificm. Pacific over on twitch.tv slash criticalroll and youtube.com slash criticalroll. If you subscribe to our Twitch channel, you can watch the video on demand immediately after the broadcast.

And it's also available Mondays at 12 p.m. Pacific on YouTube. And of course, for all you wonderful podcast listeners, freshly minted episodes release right here on the Critical Role Podcast Network one week after our broadcast on Thursdays. With all that said, let's get into the story. Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us voice actors sit around and play Dungeons and Dragons. Wow. Our first sponsor for the evening

is Warner Brothers Games. And the new game, Mortal Kombat 1. Sam! Mortal Kombat! One is the latest game in the acclaimed Mortal Kombat franchise developed by NetherRealm Studios.

You can't look at this. There's secrets. Stop cheating. In it, discover a reborn Mortal Kombat universe created by fire god Liu Kang, featuring reimagined versions of iconic characters along with a new fighting system, game modes, bone crushing finishing moves and more.

And to celebrate Mortal Kombat 1, which launches September 19th, I thought today we would play a quick game that I'd like to call Mortal or Nortal. Oh. Nortal? Where you win if you correctly identify characters from past Mortal Kombat games.

I need two players. Who is going to volunteer? Sure. Ashley Johnson. This is not scripted. I'll do it, I'll do it. Okay, Ashley and who? Because I got two players. Who is going to volunteer? Sure. Ashley Johnson. This is not scripted. I'll do it. I'll do it. Okay. Ashley and who? Because I got called out. You know too much.

You know it. You know it. Travis Davis. I can't do this franchise. Cool. We'll do Travis. No, I meant it. I can't do it. Somebody else. Over there. I don't know anything about it. Okay. Ashley and Laura. You didn't specify people couldn't participate. That's unfair. Okay. Here's the rules. I will list some names. You buzz in and tell me which is the real Mortal Kombat character

and you will win a point. Now, we don't have buzzers, so to buzz in you must say, get over here! Or finish him! Or I am Sub-Zero, not Captain Cold! That's not a catchphrase. Okay, are you ready?

Yeah. Round one, who is the real Mortal Kombat character? MoCap, Creed Aventus, Jovan Musk, or Toy Boy? Get over here! Okay, who is it? Oh, good bugger. Creed Aventus. Is the real one? Sure. Incorrect! Laura, would you like to steal?

Shit, I think I know what it is. Get over here, Toy Boy! Incorrect. Those are both men's cologne brands. As is Johann Musk. MoCap is the correct. It's just a dude in a mocap suit. That is awesome! It's not awesome.

Round two. But Mortal Kombat 1 is. Okay, round two. Round two. Here, you do that. Round two. Thank you. Now I'll list three real names. Which of these four is fake? Ready? Nightwolf, Dagon, Afrojack, Meat. Get over here. What is it?

Dagon. Incorrect. Oh Meat. Get over here. What is it? Dagon. Incorrect. Oh! Trixie. Finish him. Yes, Ashley? Meat? Incorrect.

Dang it, I had a feeling. I was like, it's too weird. The answer is Afrojack. He's actually a Dutch DJ, and he's 6'10". Oh, is he really? I'm right, I'm right. Round three, someone please get one right. 6'10"? I will list guest characters from past games

or the upcoming MK1 game. Tell me which one was not a guest character. Wait, a guest character on what? They have guest characters come in to- No. Previous ones have been like Robocop. Don't tell them! Oh, sorry.

Okay. Okay. Whoa! Omni-Man, Rambo, Shazam, Skeletor. Get over here! What is it? Shazam! No!

Damn it! I'm going to go with... You got to buzz in. Oh, I'm sub-zero. Yes, Ashley! Omni-Man? No! The red boogers! Is it Rambo? No! Ashley, The Rambo game! Is it Rambo? No!

Ashley, you ruined it! You ruined our fun! I made the album! You boob! I made the album! This is how a Skeletor should be. Skeletor is awesome, all I could picture was Skeletor. There was no winner, so I will get the prize.

The prize was reading the end of the ad. Mortal Kombat 1 launches September 19th on PS5, Xbox Series SX, PC, Nintendo Switch, or upgrade to the Premium Edition to start playing today, which includes the Kombat Pack 1, featuring Quan Chi, Ermac, and Takeda, along with guest characters Peacemaker, Omni-Man, and Homelander.

But wait, there's more! Don't forget to check out our Mortal Kombat 1 one-shot on September 19th, featuring Travis Willingham, Gina Darling, Noshir Dalal, GM Marisha Ray, and best of all, me, on Twitch and YouTube at 7pm Pacific on September 19th. Thank you, Warner Brothers Games, for sponsoring this episode. Matt, get over here. Thank you very much. Don't worry, it's Sam in the one shot. Sam is very funny in the one shot.

It's fantastic. I learned a lot about Mortal Kombat. Your final point. Huh? Put it back. Everyone understands the assignment. You did great. Thank you. A lot of great one-liners. Oh, it's me!

Guys, check out Queen by Midnight. We actually did a Queen by Midnight Let's Play that we released this week. We have special guest princesses, Amy Carerro and Aabria Iyengar fighting with our very own Laura and Taliesin. It was Taliesin. I thought it was Ash. Yeah, Taliesin is in it. I look fantastic. And you were fantastic. Thank you. And of course, our illustrious midnight crier, Kyle Shire.

Kyle Shire! He created and designed the game. It's real good. It's a super fun game. You've got to go check it out. You can check out the Let's Play now on YouTube. And remember, Queen by Midnight is available now at all of our Darrington Press Guild stores and other friendly local game stores, as well as the Critical Role shop. Amazingly done. Also, the Tiledroid Campaign Setting Reborn is available on D&D Beyond, if you didn't know that. It comes with a full book, all of its content, as well as all the character creation options that can be used in your D&D Beyond character sheet.

NPCs, monsters available for the encounter builder, easy access to book art to download and share with all the others in your group, four digital backdrops. It's a great package, and it's available now at a discounted price of 29.99, so check it out at dndbeyond.com. A lot of wonderful people put a lot of hard work in this,

as well as myself, and I hope you like it. Enjoy. Laura, you're up. Hey-o-ay! Oh, hey-o! In all of our shops, we have three new tankard wraps. Ooh!

Hold them up, guys. We've got, this is from artist Chris Gladys, we have The Adventure Begins, we have Long May I Reign. And we also have, what the F is up with that? Oh! That's awesome. Oh, that one.

With the bleep. With the new logo. Yeah, I don't have that one. The adventure begins. Da da da da da da da. We, in addition to that, we have, oh, this fabulous shirt. What's that, what's that?

This Is It Thursday Yet T-shirt by artist Jordan Torrance, who is amazing. Oh, that fabulous shirt? What's that? What's that? This is a Thursday Yet t-shirt by artist Jordan Torrance, who is amazing. Oh, that's cool. It's got a comic on it. So yeah, we've got this amazing shirt for the U.S., the U.K., Australia, and Canada, and guess what? You special EU people, you get. Oh god.

Cool. Macca, side of the desert. A new game. It's spilled everywhere, keep going. You get a special variant design. Ooh! Ooh! The green! The green is cool.

Check it out, they're in our stores. And maybe there will be more variants coming up for different regions, I don't know. I don't know if that's going to happen. I'm talking out of my butt. Nice, that's a good thing. Maybe I'll tell people to make variants more often. I don't know.

I'm going to stop talking. I'm done. Okay. Thank you so much, Laura. You're welcome. Don't you have a bugaka? I do believe that concludes our announcements. So let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role. Critical Role.

Critical. Critical. It's Thursday night. One by one we climb until we reach the top. Two by two we fall. Will we meet our end or meet our destiny? Hold your breath and roll. How do you want to do this?

It's Thursday night. All ye critters come join us. It's time to continue our flight There is magic and mystery Who knows what will happen He might But one thing's for sure We never give up on the fight

From the healer to the renegade We all share the same goal Adding more allies, taking more chances Hold your breath and roll You can certainly try It's Thursday night All ye critters come join us It's time to continue our play

It's Thursday night There is magic and mystery from darkness, our friendship will rise But one thing's for sure, we never give up on the fight Oh, get ready, it's Thursday night! Oh, get ready, it's Thursday night! And welcome back. Last we left off, Bell's Hells had traversed across Exandria in an instant

at the behest of the Voice of the Tempest to one of the many islands that make up the Shattered Teeth. From beyond the fog curtain, they landed upon the island of Slival. Upon wandering through the strange, dense forests and black rock cliffs and beaches, you encountered strange flying frog-like pixie creatures. You befriended some and requested a bunch to shit on you.

Uh-huh. That's right. You found out about a guardian upon this island in hopes maybe they could guide you to your individual of interest, the Shorshrew. You, at the request of these creatures, lit a massive bonfire at one of the hilltops, which called the attention of a dangerous, sightless beast that began to attack Chetney and the rest of the group.

In defending them and trying to gain control of the battlefield, a massive shadow grew in the sky where an incredibly large, blackened toad creature slammed into the ground and revealed itself to be the living abode of, indeed, Jorana, the Shorshrew that you were seeking. After managing to knock away the creature of danger, you were invited into her home

and answered a number of your questions, presented some possible opportunities to get to your destination, the island of Calutha, and you decided the best route was to take an enchanted compass that belonged to a dread captain who runs a ghost ship. So after taking a moment to rest, enjoying some tea and some light conversation,

the toad homestead bounded across the island and has just deposited you on the island shore, the northeastern shore, to find the rest of your journey. So here, you have stepped out from the mouth into the midday fog obscured light. You can hear the ocean waves crashing and can see just beyond the edges of the tree line there where the water itself curls up along the beach and then pulls back and away.

Somebody. We have the- Somebody got that compass. The compass? I got it. Want to dip it? I've also whittled an exact copy, just in case we need to switch a rule, whatever. So smart.

Yeah, sure am. You do realize that when you put your exact copy into the water, it's going to float, right? Well, yeah. It's more so if we want to steal the compass back and escape, I think. Okay, I think, how's the weight differential here? It's a little significant, but, you know, they're ghosts.

They're not significant. So, you know, it's going to fall through their hands, right? I'll give you that. That's okay, that's okay. Also, even if we wanted to steal the compass back, isn't there a whole deal that they're like, ah, my compass, and they keep following the compass? Forever. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, unless things get really weird, I'm perfectly okay with them keeping it. Wait, they follow the compass forever? We're literally making up the rules right now. It's not backed by science or experience. Those rules are very defined. The guy who owned the compass previous to Jorana said that he had been chased by them.

They were trying to get him because he had it. So he pawned it off on her, and for some reason, they didn't go after her. That's just his landlord. That house is moving. Probably hard to catch. He's got to be in the water. But remember, she also said

that he's looking around for all of his lost treasure, and that's part of it. Let's call him up. We also got to keep our eyes out for some beef serpent named Squala or something? I can't read my notes. Beef serpent? Reef serpent.

That's an R. Reef. Reef, moss, bombs. Reef serpent. No, no, no, that's something else, I'm sorry. Although beef serpent's not half bad. Okay, here comes the compass. Is it open or is it a lid to it?

This compass, actually, it looks in shape and size like a larger sea navigational compass. It has an additional layer that clasps over it that you can see elements of it both adjust with a magnetic directional point, but it doesn't have any numbers scrawled on it. As you know, a number of these compasses are specifically enchanted to lead to a specific location.

So it's less about figuring out where you are and more just the direction your target is. Oh shit. Can I do an investigation, or can I really closely analyze the compass for any kind of initials or notches or pictograms or anything? Certainly make an investigation check.

Okay. Once we get the ghost ship here, how do we convince them to do our bidding? Will they just obey us? I think that we'll have to come to some sort of mutually beneficial. We have money, man. They don't want money.

Well, I assume, I don't know, maybe ghost money. I'm not. Laudna, what do they accept debt? Booty. Closure. Oh. Booty. Who doesn't like closure? It's sad. Mm-hmm.

17 on the compass check. It's definitely weathered. The brass exterior of it has a number of scrapes and gash marks, and there's a little crack on the glass, but it seems to still be functioning. You don't see any initials on it, but you do see that it looks like it was probably crafted initially to just be a compass

and then had elements added to it before the enchantment was placed within. That's as much as you can tell. And if we're facing towards the Eastern Ocean, is that correct? Yeah. Facing east, which way is it pointing from where we are? From where you are, it's pointing in a southeastern direction.

Southeastern? We're down by the Shattered Teeth? Wow, crazy. Maybe he lost it amongst the Shattered Teeth. What if we just follow where the compass is for a little bit? Maybe we'll find the hidden treasure and then we can use that to barter.

Follow the compass? Mm-hmm. Because the compass, as our brains indicated, usually is enchanted to a single. Specific location. Yeah. It's got to be pointing at something, that's fair. Is it pointing at something? Can you move it? Spin around in a circle.

Spin it around, yeah. Can you turn it? Just turn it to something else? It definitely seems locked in a direction. It stays fixed. But can you move the dial to select a different direction? Wait, what? What?

Do you know how compasses work? Nope. FCG, normally a compass reads north, so you know which direction you're pointing. You said it's pointing southeast. Yeah, it's pointing at a specific enchanted location. Above the table, Matt Mercer literally just said it's enchanted to point to a place of interest.

Like a place of import. Let's talk about this. All right, fine. What's on the map in that direction? On that island. I mean, it's where we need to go. Come do that. What if they just... But how are we going to follow it?

We can't swim in the water. They're going to give us a ride. Maybe they want to go there, too. Literally nothing. We're over here somewhere, right? The southeast is... The southeast is that way. Are you sure?

Because maybe the map's upside down. I mean, the words are like this. I know fucking which way. Oh, okay. What if you do this and do this? Then this appears. We have a pocket dimension, right? We have a hole. We have a hole full of dead people.

That fucking reminds me, we got to clean that up. Oh yeah. Oh, I was supposed to talk to the dead people. While we wait, let's call the pirates and while we're waiting for them to arrive. No, I think that's so fast. We should do that talking part first. Talk to the dead people, then call the dead people.

You think the ghost people will come that fast? Probably. They're ghosts. All right, we'll pull out the dead bodies. But I was going to say, after we call the pirates, why don't we put the compass in the hole? Because then they can be like, where's our compass? And we can be like, we don't have it anymore.

It's not on this plane of existence. You can use your magics, but you won't find it. And then what? And we'll only give it to you if you take us to our destination. Oh, FCG, this is dastardly. A bit aggressive, but all right. You taught me well, Ash.

Charm them. I'm taking it. We could charm them, too, but I don't know. We're going to summon them, and then with this thing that they're intent on. Yeah, be like, we have it, but we won't give it to you. What if they feel it in their intangible undead bones? They can if it's in a different dimension. But aren't we going to call them with it first?

Yeah, we'll call them and then put it away. But once they get the call, they're going to be like, how'd you call? You got my cell phone. Yeah, we can say we had it and we'll give it back to you. But with our crazy, our sorcery, it's not here right now. Look, we made an amazing one-for-one replica. We've definitely gotten our eyes on it. That's proof that we know what it looks like.

It's right here, it's right here. Who's got the red? Who's got the red? I feel like they're the seeds of a decent plan here. Let's talk to dead people. Yeah, yeah, break out that hole. All right, are we near water? What are we supposed to ask these dead people? I don't even remember who these guys are.

Yeah, who do we look out for? It's all the Grim Verity that we beat, right? Oh, that's right. Grim Verity? No. Ruby Vanguard? Paragon's Call. Right.

Whatever the red color is. Officer General Rutanish is in there, too. Oh. Oh, that's great. We were going to talk to him and be like, what's your plan? And then we are going to put that body in the ocean and let it go away.

Yeah. A proper paragon. Let's see. Sure. All right, pull them out, Ashton. I'll get my spell ready. Are we near water or anything? We're right at the water zone. All right.

That's where the frog deposited. Yes, all right. I'm going to find somewhere flat where the water, the tide's not going to... I assume there's somewhere flat that the tide's not going to. There is a stretch of darker beach that stretches for about 20 or so feet before it hits the water. Yeah, I don't want to be one of those terrible videos.

All right. Flatten it out, and I'm going to take everything. I'm going to take them out. Oh, I see what you mean, for the hole. For the hole. For the hole, you have to search a bit and find a bit of sea-worn rock, where it's not a perfectly flat surface,

but it's just enough of a flat surface that it bends over and creates the hole. But it takes you about an hour to find the right place for it. Now, can we flatten out some sand? I was going to say, we can pound sand or no? Sand, unfortunately, is porous. That's fair, that's fair.

It's a relatively majority contact with the specific flat material. So I'll say you do find a rock that's been battered by the ocean up to the point where it has a smooth space that you can finagle it and make it work. We also have a pair of boots that have never been identified in there.

Oh, I can do that as well. That's right, they're a fancy. Oh. So, well, we can wait if we need to. Okay. I'm going to open it up. I'm going to pull them out. I'm going to take off as much,

all the armor and otherwise, and make them look real sexy. What am I asking these guys? I don't know. Ooh, you're right. What's your plan? I have three? Five. Five questions.

What's your plan? What were you doing with Imahara? Well, we know that, though. For what? He was making weapons for the Paragon's Call. We know where Ludmille says he's on the move. Rune-stop nullifiers or something like that? Yeah.

Yeah. I guess we'll see if there's something else. Are those items that we got from Jorana in the inventory? Let's see what else. They should get out of the locker. Did you like being a member of the Paragon's Call? What do they pay?

Maybe you could say, what were you having Imahara Cho make explosives for? I don't know. Or something like that. Did we already know that? I mean, because they were doing, they were. They were blowing up the sky ships. They were blowing up ships. And to remind you,

dead creatures are not compelled to tell the truth, especially if they identify you as an enemy or hostile. So. Nobody's really sweet to. Well. We could put on, do we have any paragons called robes? I could style my hair like my mom. We could just blindfold him. You could. You could be your mom.

Never mind, that's better. That's really cool. I like that. I can make a minor illusion. What if I illusion your mom and pop at her? And then you talk. Like you move the mouth and you talk? Seems like it'll work. That's definitely way better

than just styling my hair. Just style your hair and put you in some of their robes? Sure. What does she wear normally? Just regular clothes. Okay. Not red? I don't think she was in red.

No, last you saw her, she was wearing a dark brown trench coat, yeah. Do we have one of them? I do have a, it's a little much, but it's a sleeveless black trench with a red interior, with a dark red. Yeah, let's switch it out. I'll put it on. And do it.

Hair and a braid. Laudna, help her switch it out. I'll put it on. And do it. Hair and a braid. Laudna, help her with her hair. Okay. You can stitch a skull into a rat, and this is a problem. I did, I wasn't around little girls for a long time, but I didn't know how to braid, really. Should I do the main guy, General Rutanish,

or one of the underlings? I feel like we should practice on one of the underlings first. Yeah, that's a good idea. You can do a couple of folks. How many do we have? I don't have any idea what the fuck I'm asking about. It's just like, hey, it's me.

What are we doing? I'm your boss. Tell's just like, hey, it's me. What are we doing? I'm your boss, tell me what my plan is. What do you think about it? What was I last doing on the moon when you saw me? All right, I will cast the incantation. I will raise the spirits of the dead and speak to one of the underlings. Please forgive me for corrupting the fates,

change bringer, and I'll cast the spell. Okay, is this someone of the standard kind of nearby bruiser types? Is this the druid? Oh, druid sounds good. They might know some stuff. We took everything that was a problem. Right, but which body are you using? I'll do druid. Pull the druid out, I They might know some stuff. We took everything that was a problem. Right, but which body are you taking?

Druid. I'll do druid. Pull the druid out, I imagine. Okay, okay. At least know some stuff. I'll take the other. I'm going to be, yeah, I'll drag you. Oh, and let's all hide so she only sees druid. I mean, you. You too?

All righty. So you pull over to the druid. Its body broken from the impact of it plummeting from the sky in its final moments. And Bassuras, the jaw sky in its final moments, and Bassuras, the jaw open in this agape, terrified final moment expression of pain in the eyes. Still wide if the muscles themselves are lax.

Stench already isn't great, but you pull the body out onto the beach and you leave your incantation and you watch as the mist that's rolling by, some of it seems to swirl a bit and gather before going into the open mouth, the druid's chest expands. The eyes look over and lock in with yours.

The jaw twitches like it's trying to begin to make noise, but has no purpose to yet, but the spell has taken hold. Okay. So you're standing there with me? no purpose to yet. But the spell has taken hold. Okay. So you're standing there with me? I guess I had to cast the spell and now I'll just quietly back away and turn my attention to Imogen. And I'm going to look at the dead druid.

You failed your mission. Where is Thul? Make a deception check. I should have given you some guidance or something ahead of time. This is why we practice. 19. 19.

Oh wait, no, that's a lie, 21. 21, okay. You deceived him. You deceived. The eye's like, 21, okay. You deceived him. You deceived. The eyes, shift over back to you. And you asked it. Where is Thul?

She remains at the Key. Key. That's the Key. Okay, okay. Key here.'s the key. Okay. Key here. Mm-hmm. In my head, I will say to FCG,

what the fuck else am I supposed to be asking about? They told me to ask about Ludinus. What was the plan? Perdathos? Perdathos? Perdathos? I don't know. Is he gaining strength? Yeah, is it time? I don't know. How many have come over?

I don't know. I saw a hundred more. Did you ever speak to Ludinus? No, just watched him. What about the defenses at ground zero? I don't know how much time is left. That's a good one, too. That's a good one. Just New York City pigeons.

All that fucking face. Tears start to pour. And how much time until we strike? The dead person's confused. I don't know. Good, good. Was that three questions? That was four. That was four.

That's fair. Okay. This is going about as well as it could go. Did. What? What? What about Rodathos? What about Rodathos? What about Rodathos? I can't just ask so. Is he loose?

What's Ludenist doing next? What are Rodathos' weaknesses? So anyway, have you talked to Rodathos? Give him a hard jump. What about him? We know that already. I guess so, yeah. Why are they blowing up the ships, though?

Because they're going to attack them. We know this. We know this. I'm just staring at you, and you're ahead. I'm just staring at you. We can just leave it at four. And just let him sit here. What's the greatest threat to our organization?

What is the greatest threat to our organization? They've mentioned unity. Unity. Unity. Keep them scattered. That was good. That was good. Spell releases. Jeez Louise, that was pathetic. I didn't get the first couple words either,

but it seemed like unity. They mentioned unity. They're trying to keep them scattered. Okay. So. Is that why we got shunted? Maybe. Maybe they're trying to cause dissension among the gods, the different gods.

Or keep the mortals from gathering and organizing, and that's why they're blowing up all these ships. Stopping communication. Yeah. We need to figure out a way to send messages to gather folks, like a chain letter. What's a chain letter? You write a letter to one person, if they don't send it to 10, bad luck, shuttle.

Should we ask for a hidden or secret way to the key? There's some way that they're communicating. Yeah, where's the secret entrance? Oh yeah, do they have a way of communicating? Clearly they're organized. Oh yeah, they are, aren't they? All right, if we raise up General Rutanish, why don't we do a little bit better planning

on what we're going to ask? Yeah, we probably should do that. Also, is there somebody else that, because how, I didn't think about the fact that why would I be asking the questions if I'm my mom? You're the boss. Why am I asking them? Maybe you can say like,

you drank a lot last night. I was going to say, when you bonked your head and you can't remember some of the details. As a good and dutiful soldier, yeah. You're interrogating them. You're testing. You're making sure this has to be. Before you bring them back. Prove you know, and then you can go on your merry way to death.

Or back to life. Or back to life, if you do a good job. Back to death. Back to reality. All right, we're going to ask them if they have any special means of communication. Guidance? Yeah, thanks. We're going to ask them if they have any special means of communication. Guidance? Thanks. We're going to ask them if they have any special defenses at Ground Zero, maybe?

I don't know. Sure, yeah. Secret ways in or out? Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. How do you get in and out of? That's all we got. What about our secret entrances? Do you have them guarded? Should I act like I already know

about our secret entrances? Yeah, of course. Or maybe you could fudge it like you've been split off from their forces and are a little out of the loop. Yeah. Yeah, that's why you would want to communicate. Something went wrong and you got shunted. You've been tied up with the Dawnfather's forces,

something like that. Sure. But better. All right. Maybe if we ask the greatest threat again and specify unity, do they mean the gods? Do they mean mortals? Or I can be like, our greatest threat is unity. Clarify. Clarify.

Unity of what? Don't you think? All right, we got four questions. The fifth question can be just potpourri. Whatever the, I didn't write them down. I got them. Okay, you feed them to me. We can also ask what happened to the other two. Other two, the monk and the other one.

Oh. Oh. The dirt wizard and the monk? Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's good. Yeah, what happened to those two? Great, all right. Great Dolly and Emperor folk sniffing around. Sad sacks of terrible. I will place my coin on General Rutanish's forehead and imbue in it

the magic of life, but brief life. Okay. The ruined torso of Rutanish lays sprawled out on this beach, the cold mists blowing through. As you put the coin to the forehead, that mist swirl happens once more and the chest rises. Oh! Yeah.

Piss deep in the chest. Chest is his jelly beans. Okay. The eyes like His chest is as deep as his chest. Chest is as jelly-billed. That's fine. The eyes like, you can hear the congealed liquid straining against the dried eyes. I am sitting behind this, just enjoying the view of the back of it.

Stupid Talmud voice actor. I know. Congratulations. You fell to a group of weaklings. Luckily, our master is forgiving. We can bring you back. If you prove yourself. That's good, that's good. Make an exception check. That's good, that's good.

Make an exception check. That's good, that's good. You guys got it! You guys got it! You guys got it! We didn't stop! We didn't stop! Okay, that's 11 plus nine.

Oh! Okay, okay. That's a 12. Eight and a four is 12. 12 plus nine. That's 21. 21 again. Blackjack. Plus nine. Oh! Okay, okay. That's a 12. Eight and a four is 12. 12 plus nine. That's 21. 21 again. Blackjack. Plus five.

Because? Because I'm Nick. Carry on. She's looking at you. You haven't asked a question yet, so maybe that's okay. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. In your head. What am I asking? Oh, sorry, sorry.

So, the means of communication that they use. Like secret ways of communicating. That they use. After long distances. You've been cut off, right? Tell me how we communicate. Old-fashioned way. This solstice

scrambled the soul. Old-fashioned way. Yeah, just seem to see. Insight check. Yeah, insight check him. I feel like he won't. No. The old-fashioned way is they sleep with each other.

There's a dead person answering a question. Can I detect thoughts on a dead person that's being? There is no conscious brain or mind here. This is a spell that is recalling memories and personality, but it's its own separate conjuration, so no, you can't. There's technically no one there anymore. The house is empty. Correct. This is the body remembering an echo

of who once occupied it. These are member empty. Correct. This is the body, remembering an echo of who once occupied it. These are member berries. Yes. Remember the question you asked? Remember, Ludinus? We were going to ask them about any secret entrances or defenses. Tell me how you've protected, how we've protected our entrances into the key.

Oh, if Mists requested, and the moonfolk have kept eyes as well. and the moonfolk have kept eyes as well. Moonfolk have kept eyes as well. Is that what you said? Okay. That's all the question right there. No, oh no!

Who was the first one? I didn't catch the first part. I didn't catch the first part either. Oh, it was the soldiers. The soldiers have been moved as you've requested. Ah, ah, ah. Oh. With some sisters.

Great. Good. Plus that. That was defenses. We got secret entrances, maybe? Or something about unity, specifically specifying who we're trying to keep ununited. Goddamn it. The Empire siblings?

You were in charge of keeping rebellions down, yes? Oh, that was question. Shit! Keeping rebellions down, yes. Oh, that was question. Fuck! Partially. Fuck! What? Partially? Is it going to elaborate?

No, he's not. Yeah. Oh, fucking man. There you go. Stare him down. Stare him down! Stare him down. Boil him down. Does this curb your enthusiasm? There we go.

Okay, okay, okay. Oh crap. Shit! And then the monk and the wizard. Wait, was that three questions? No, I didn't even answer those three. There's three questions. We have two more. So you can still press on about Unity or secret entrances or the monk and the wizard. Fuck the Unity entrances.

Monk and the wizard. Yeah. I don't know how to phrase, where are our entrances that are secret? Which secret entrance do you use? How would Jester phrase that? I'm going full Jester. You're trying to get back there as fast as you can. You need to know where the latest secret entrances are.

Which secret entrance do you use? I've... There's tents in there. What's the latest secret entrances are? What secret entrances do you use? There's tents in there. As you can see, I've been separated from our forces. Oh god. What? The last one made a fart sound.

Tell me about our entrances into the key. Please? Uh, can you? She's becoming Yoda! You want the secret em, don't you, have you? I'm so worried. Okay. Fucking wizard.

Yeah! You have many tricks up your sleeve. Yes, I do. The main pit entrance is easy. Otherwise... Make a deception check again. He's... He's putting two and two together in his dead skull.

Come on. Come on. Fuck, shit, balls, mother fuck, shit. 14. 14? Yes. They were closed behind us as a precaution. Should I insight check him?

Yeah, do it, do it, do it. Ashley's doing it, too. Okay, do it, do it. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. What's up? I'm looking for me. Oh, everybody's just balls. 17. What. 17.

What? 17. You have a ball that's 13. 13? Do I have an insight? Holy shit. What? Oh, a whisper! Oh, oh, oh!

Guys, what do we have to plug? What's coming out this week? Mortal Kombat, Queen by Midnight. Mortal Kombat, what's that? Mortal Kombat One Shot. Queen by Midnight. It's super fun. Queen by night. It's super fun. Queen by combat.

Mortal Queens. Mortal Queen. Mortal Queen bats. Except for one. He's being, I look at you, get in my head. I'm in your head, what? He, I don't think is being truthful. He's being a little sassy with you.

Yeah, I think he knows. Which I feel like you probably be bumping into. I feel like, yeah. Okay. He's I think he knows. Which I feel like you probably think I'm bumping in. I feel like, yeah, yeah. Okay. He's not going to care. Intimidate him. I'm going to punch him in his dead face. Yeah.

See, I'm going to kill you. Punch him in the dick. What the hell is going on? Pull out part of your body with your dick. I'm going to use my Mage Hand. I'm going to rip the head off of the dead body and bring it up in the air so it's looking at me in the eye.

Tongue's kind of. What happened to the two? The wizard and the monk? Probably dead. Just like you. Yeah. You did so well. That was fucking terrible! You did great.

If it makes you feel better, why don't you take his head and use it like a skipping stone across the ocean? Yeah, I'm going to do that. Okay. Big monster's like, . Don't go in the ocean!

Should we do the other one? God. Wait, we're doing more? No, don't make me do that again. Somebody else can do it. I'm going to go deal with some of this shit anyway. There's nothing like- These are low-level punks. But we do know that there were secret entrances. We just don't have the locations.

We close, okay. And we know that there are soldiers and moonfolk. And a hundred strong had come over. A hundred, what? Ryloren's? Ryloren's had come over. That's the moonfolk, right? Yeah. And the Communicabial Fashionway by Pigeon, I guess. That's great.

And that Otohan Thul remains at the Malleus Key. That's good info. That's good info. That's good info. You did great! I'm going to go clean up our mess, if you don't mind. I'm just going to bundle up whoever's left and grab the head and walk a little bit down towards the shore.

I'm going to remove the armor, and I'm going to start tossing the meat chunks into the water, and then I'm going to beat the metal parts until they are not recognizable as armor. Okay. Then I'm going to throw them in the water, too, give them a nice big throw. Got it. Wait, wait, wait. What?

Can you give me a couple of Rutanish's molars? Just a couple Teefees. Happily. Thank you very much. Put down a couple of Rutanish molars in your inventory. I did throw the head into the sea, but. Oh, that's right. I thought you skipped it. You didn't.

I thought you skipped it down the beach. Sure. Oh yeah, I know. It's fine. Water's not too, it's kind of chilly. You can jump out there and grab it. Look, it's like 15 feet out floating right over there. I'll just go grab it.

He came back in. All righty. All right, should we call the ghost pirates? Uh-huh. Sure, and I guess we call the ghost pirates by just taking the compass and sticking it in the water. Yeah. Sure. Is this, I don't know anything about the sea.

Is this a good place for a boat to land? I guess it's a ghost boat, doesn't matter. It's not like it's going to run ashore or anything. Let's make sure that we're a bit far. How do we step on a ghost boat? The boat matter. It's not like it's going to run ashore or anything. Let's make sure that we're a bit far. How do we step on a ghost boat? The boat's real, but the ghosts aren't? Correct.

How's everybody feeling? I don't know, I'm just speculating. Oh, that's true, that's true. Some of us are. You're dead. Figgity fuck, no. Hold up, hold up. Before we start to travel with more dead people, is everyone okay? Do you want to take a couple hours?

We took a short rest in the toad. We did. Yeah. I'm good, but. I'm good. I do think I got messed with. Let's see where I'm at. I regained my spells from the vial. By the way, does anyone want that, what's it called, the Pearl of Power?

Yeah. Do you want that? Oh wait rest was inside the toad. Oh wait, you have to attune to it. Yes, you do. I did not pick it for a reason. I was going to watch her. I think I'm full up on it. Go for it.

I got two rages left, I think. That's pretty good. So not so much. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I'm all right. I'll live. All righty. All right, let's dip the dipstick.

He's doing his makeup short rest here. I assume that our little flat plane is close enough away from the water that we can get to the hole, since I haven't folded it up yet. We can get to the hole and just toss the compass in there if we need. Okay. Chetney's having to sit down. Okay. If we need. You're doing this? Compass. Okay.

Of the dread Captain Novos, which is Sovone backwards, grant us Correct the code. Dabooti. Dip into water. You place it into the water. Bloosh.

You pull it out, and as the water drips off of it, where it hits the water, this renewed, thick mist billows out from where it made contact and spills out, and you can see it gives this thick layer of low, hanging mist that begins to spread across the beach side in front of you. The fog that, at this time of day

where it burns back a little bit, and you can't see the horizon, but definitely you have a better view of many of the rocks at the inlet, you know, 100, 200, 300 feet out, begins to close in even further. The temperature noticeably gets colder. Where it was a comfortable, maybe low 60s,

it almost immediately begins to crawl into the 50s, the 40s. You can begin to see your breath in the air. The back hole. All right. Do I hear anything with a 29? We got two holes! Do I hear anything through the fog with a 29?

29? You hear nothing. I imagine talking about our horse. Other than the adjusting of waves crashing on the shore and the winds blowing through, you hear nothing. What you see, Oh boy. noiselessly is a shadowed shape

beginning to breach the distant fog bank that obscures and encloses your vision. You begin to see, as it cruises at an angle from the outer portion of what water you can see, the bow of a massive ship. As it begins to cruise up, you see chains hanging off the side, can see the bow of a massive ship. As it begins to cruise up, you see chains hanging off the side,

some thick, almost like an overgrown moss that seems to cluster up this damaged ship as it continues to push through. You see masts come into view, their sails tattered and hanging in strips, and you see a handful of dark shapes along the bow as it silently approaches. Who's going to talk to these guys?

I got it. Closer. Let me give you some sort of a boost. That's crazy. She said, use the compass and use the compass and then just gain. I'm going to cast Enhance Ability on you and give you, what's it called? Charisma. Yeah, the Charisma of Owl's Wisdom.

Nope, that's not it. I think Cat's. Cat's Grace? Nope, that's Dexterity. Which one is it? Eagle's Splendor? Eagle's Splendor! That's right. Charisma checks.

You get advantage on all charisma. How about Guidance? How about Guidance? You get advantage? Advantage on the shit that's right. Charisma checks. You get advantage on all charisma. How about Guidance? Do you have Guidance? You get advantage? Advantage on? The ship curves along the outskirts of the cove that you're at, the beach with the rocks.

I cannot go on another date. Curse episode. I'll stand in front of Chetney and take my ball gown and hike it up. I know, it's bugging you to fix it. Oh! Putting it out? Yes. Putting it out? That's it!

It's fine. No, no. It's going to ruin her. I'll fix it. It's because it's not straight. I guess that's right. The ship stops and you can see mist pouring off the deck and into the water below to meet the mist

that has been apparating from the space where you placed the compass. Immediately, about six of the shattered shapes into the water. Oh, they can swim? And vanish beneath the waves. They're ghosts, you can swim! Well, four more.

The word you're looking for is... We're going to be parlaying, we're going to be talking. Yeah. This is going to be a negotiation. I'm just going to cast Mage Armor on myself, just in case he's there. Don't start, Shed. I've already felt my hair.

Okay. I'm going to get the girls out. The water begins to break about 30 or so feet from where you are on the beachfront. Fruit roll that. The water breaches, and you can see figures just walking through the waves. Cool, cool.

The rotted remnants of long, missing skin and flesh now left in thin lines across what is mainly skeletal figures, wearing bits of torn leather armor and holding cutlasses and daggers at their sides as they emerge from the water. Four, six, 10 of them, all just marching up the shore towards you. Are they splashing the water,

or is it just cutting through the water? No, the water is splashing. They are physical skeletal creatures. Okay. Do any of them have a head wound? You can see one of them that looks like it has a part of it was shot with probably a bolt of some kind. They have a nice, any of them nicely dressed or anything?

They all look pretty ragged. Oh, it's fair. It was a nice, is any of them nicely dressed or anything? Is there a? They all look pretty ragged. Oh, it's fair. It was a bolt, though. You can see there are a few other handful of figures that are still on the ship back there. And as they approach, just at a decent march, weapons out. The thick briny water waters spilling through the ribs

that are exposed now to the open jaws, draining out of the empty cavities and the skull as they approach. This raspy voice echoes out from the ship beyond. Take it from them. Leave them bleeding. Whatever they have is ours. We hit it, right?

I need you to roll an issue. Oh! This combat is brought to you by WizKids Mini's Joint Forces with the Mighty Nein! What happened to the succession? We should go to the parlay! What happened to the parlay? We didn't decide to just say anything.

We just take their whole legit. Join forces with the Mighty Nein to take on the terrifying Uk'otoa. Free order this behemoth today. Expand your collection of CR miniatures at whizkids.io. Whizkids.io slash CR minis or your local game store. Whiz Kids Combat Cam, everybody. Hey, look, we're back in Dalen's closet. It's very picturesque here. I was picturing the coast of Seattle or something. What? A little more gloomy.

Oh, what? Oh, yeah. Calm point, Matt. Calm point. It's huge. Cool. Look at the anchor. Level up to the WizKids boat. The anchor's like a clawed foot.

Oh my god. That's a cool anchor. A clawed foot! Yes, bring that ball again. Yeah. Beep. Yeah! Scoop, scoop. Yeah, here comes the Seattle now.

Thank you. I need it. Well, so where are you amongst this beach at the moment? We were a bit, I mean, yeah. I'll be standing next to Chet. Above our hair. Okay, so you would've standing next to Chet. Up over here. Okay, so you would've been here,

and Chet would be here. This is going to be great. Where would the big hole have been? The hole would've been up here, would be the closest you would've had. Okay. I would've been probably just a couple, I would've been a couple layers down there,

probably in that one with little three-rock like. Right there? No, the other way. Here? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I will be next to the little stack of rocks. All right, stack of rocks over here. Like that.

Actually, sorry, further closer in. There? It looks like a little stack of rocks from right there. Oh, I see, okay. There, FCG. Oh, left of rocks from my, yeah. Oh, I see, okay. There, FCG. Oh, left of Chetney, 10 feet. 10 feet there. Orm will stick with Fearne wherever she goes.

Yeah, maybe we should, so we're not, yeah, let's maybe over here. Over here, in the front or the back? Maybe in the back. Like over here? Yeah, like in this area. Over here? Yeah. How about you, how do we feel about that? Great. Okay. Sure. Okay, one's there.

Mister out? Yes. Why not? Oh boy. Well, they're attacking us, so. We probably attack them back. Oh! That's a lot! That's a lot of them.

Oh. Oh. Oh, look at that gnarly one on the front! That's a lot of them. Oh. That's a lot. Oh, look at that gnarly one. You have a bunch of, Okay. just reminding, you know, FCG. Okay. Yep. Yep, I had a funny feeling.

Oh. Oh. I knew it. Me, oh. That's cute. It's actually got a, yeah. Why is it, it's wet. All right. It's poop. It's actually got a, yeah. Why is it, it's wet. All right. It's poop.

Feel it. That's horrifying. Is it like kid slime? It's poop. Your poop. All righty, so with that, 25 to 20. 21. 21?

Oh shit. I'm definitely also 21. All right, Dex. Or Vrolli. Yeah. And these things are clearly advancing menacingly. That's the deal here? They just sort of...

Ghost pirates don't show up to parlay for the item that got taken from them. They take it. Okay. Great. That's fine. We got a ghost shift. You got advanced. Curious. They take it. Okay. Great. It's fire. We got to go shift. You've got advanced courage.

One to 15. 16. 15. Oh, 17, sorry. So Chet, Vag. Also, you have Turn Undead and stuff, too, so. Okay. 15 to 10?

Your turn. 17. So Orym, Ashton, Chet. 10. All right, so 10 is Imogen. Okay. Who's FCG? I'm at six.

All right. Five. Taking up the rear. All righty. So with that, top of this is Orym, as they are just marching forward, weapons out. Okay, right off the bat, I'm going to scooch under Fearne's legs and switch her here.

Okay. So you're going to light them up, right? And I am going to give you an additional five to your AC, as long as you're close. You don't have to stay close, but you have to. And then I'll go to there. And then I'll step in front of her further. Actually going to scooch out just real fast next to FCG,

and then I'm going to slice the air towards the one in the lead and test them out. All right. So this big, tall one in the front. Yeah, I'll cut through the fog, hopefully. Natural 20. Woo! Nice. And the second one will be a 15.

All right, both of those hit. Okay, so first one. Let's be true to these ones there. Obviously not the main course. Yeah, not the main course. So just 12 for that, because I'm not going to juice it up. And then the second one.

Juice it up! Is a 10. So again, just a little exploratory slash at it, and as soon as I cut the arrow like that, it'll hop right back in front. Okay, and you duck back. The slices hit and you see bones crack and break. One of the arms almost falls to the side for a bit,

holds on by a tether of some sort of leather strap, and it just continues to forward. So not super slow or anything, just cool. Got it? It looks like it took some heavy damage. It's holding on by a thread. Okay.

Next. All right, finishing warm's go. Ashton, you're up. What does 40 feet look like straight into the fray? Out of curiosity. 40 feet? Yeah. 20 guys all in a row. 40 will get you about there.

Okay, can I get into melee with that one? With that one, you can. All right, I'm going to get into melee with that one, and let's see what we got going. I'm going to rage and... Ooh, interesting. Okay. This'll be a lot of fun. Well, I suddenly go a little translucent, so this is going to be fun. There's a hole in my head that goes straight through. Let's see. All right. I'm going to take a

standard swing at this guy. Go for it. 27 to hit. Nice. That definitely hits. All right. Come on, Ash. 17 points of damage.

17 points of damage on the first hit. Crack! It looks like it was a heavy hit, and it's looking pretty hurt already in one strike. I'm going to hit it again. Go for it. 15 to hit? 15 just hits.

Yeah, 15 just hits. Now we know. We've got cool beans. That's, oh wow, that landed well. Okay. 22 points of damage. Just smashes onto the ground. Okay. 22 points of damage. Dang. Just smashes onto the ground. The ribcage breaks open, the hormones filter out,

the weapon skitters a bit at the side. It is just lying there in the still wet, mushy bit of the sand, just unmoving. Is that considered a creature kill? That would be technically. Okay, I fall into the water, straight down. What? And I show up right between FCG and the order.

Cool. Right there. I come, yeah, I just drop back down. Next. Awesome. All righty, that's great. Amazing. Tight, tight, tight.

Don't stop till you take what's mine. At the 20 count, you watch as the water begins to swirl. Oh no. In this direction. It's almost like the beachfront itself, a little bit of water there, is beginning to pour into this massive whirlpool. Cool.

We're not quite in the water, are we? No. This figure over here, on the edge of the ship, leans forward with this high, shrill, screaming voice. You are the captain! Bring what you want! And pulls what looks like a moss-covered pistol, like a musket, and leans off to the side, a big blade at the side, and

is going to go ahead and take a shot. All righty. Right towards you, because you're right up front, one who was last seen holding it. Let's see. You are beyond the 60 foot, so it would be a disadvantage on the shot, but disadvantage.

That'll be a 20 to hit? Hits. All righty. So as, we'll make a 20 to hit. Hits. All righty. So as, we'll make a second strike on you as well. Second one will miss. But you take... Ooh, nine points of cold damage. Okay.

And when you watch when it fires, the muzzle flash is blue flame. As it impacts you, ice freezes up along the front of your chest before it cracks as you move your body. You glance up in pain and look around at the surrounding. You can now get a better look at a lot of these skeletons as they emerge. There's these dull blue burning points of light and their skulls as they emerge. As they step, you almost see the surface of the water seem to crack, like there's just this blanket

of freezing energy that's causing the water to slightly crystallize in their presence. Good to know. All right. Damn. That finishes their turn. Chet and you. Sheesh. Come on, Chet.

I'm stoked. I will use Yeah, I'll use a minor illusion to conjure a copy of the compass in my hand and I'll hold it up to the captain and I'll say Call off your men! We know where your compass is!

One of our party has gone to another island but we need your ship to get us there. Take us and we will help you retrieve your item. Make a deception check. You also have Guidance. I got it too early. Wow, yeah. What's Guidance? D4?

Yeah, D4. Come on! 13, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21. Okay, okay, okay. My god, the community theater worked. That's what it is. The other one was a natural one. Thanks.

Natural 20. Oh! Oh, come on! Plus stuff? That's fine! We'll find your friend. But we don't leave survivors. They don't leave survivors! That's all right.

Your crew can just stay here with us and I'll and I'll use my hybrid transformation to go wolf mode. You got it. How do we light the wolf? Because I'm not in melee, I will break over this way by 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35. Right there. You got it. Okay. Laudna, you're up.

Let's go, casters. All right. Ah, looking at their undead bony forms, I crack and dislocate a few of my bones and go to my Form of Dread. Which looks like? You know, it's a little halfway between, you know, my tree form and my widow form.

Okay, it's like a merger between the two of them. Kind of mirroring them a little bit, too. Maybe I got some barnacles, I don't know. Cool. And then I'm going to fireball them. Okay. That's how it's done. That sucks. Just right there?

Yep. Okay, yeah, so all those right there. Go ahead and roll for damage on that one. Well, okay. That's a fail. Fail. Fail. Fail.

What's your DC? 10 seconds later, yep. 16. Fail. That's my dumb joke. Fail. Fail. Yay. Fade, Jesus, how many eights are they going to roll?

So many eights, man. Fail. Fail. Success. All right, so all of them failed except for that one tiny guy over there. Some Rosencrantz and Guildenstern shit right there. They are going to die. 26 fire damage.

Ooh, 26 fire damage. Oh my god. Yo! They all just, in this explosion, you watch the bones scatter out from the detonation. The mist is burned away in a minute before it all begins to roll back in to fill the space, and they all just crumble

into piles of bone and armor under the waves as the ocean begins to drag them back out. We also do a point break shockwave. Like. Yeah, you just see the water do that dip going to drag them back out. We also do a point break shockwave. Like. Yeah, you just see the water do that dip and then come back. Yeah, a little mushroom. Then I don't know, are they immune to fear?

They're all destroyed. Didn't you say one? Oh, there is one, there is one, you're right. He has to run. Look, he's the little one. He's afraid of me. He's scared. He's immune to being frightened. He's immune to fear, that's what I thought. Can I just as a shout to the captain in Shadowcant

and say, sure, you don't want to make a deal. Make a persuasion check. Let's do it. Yes! Shadowcant came in handy. For once! Can I guide her? You got to touch somebody to guide them, and it's your action to do it.

Okay, okay, okay. But good for trying. It's your action to do it. Now I know. Natural 20! Yes! For a total of? 24. 24.

You now glance over over and up here, you see the haggard-looking skeletal dwarf with this patchy, awful, mossy beard that hangs down, tucked into this breasted-over long jacket, this hat that's burning cleft up top. You can see his eyes are burning these bright flaming blue balls that's up in the front of the face.

You see him holding this massive saber up and this gnarled-looking hand cannon in the other hand. Looks back and meets your gaze. Well, let's have a chat. He puts his weapons away. Oh! The rest, kill them. Oh!

All right! Stick! Oh! The rest, kill them. Oh! You stick. Do you want to move? Or stay put? I'll skitter towards... That way. I'll skitter that way. So did he say the rest kill them? 530 is better. to us? About us. About one.

There you go. He only wants his heart to love. Well, I don't blame him. So are we, they're parlaying, so I shouldn't attack him? Is that what we're saying? They're going to attack us. I think we have a couple more to deal with. All right, that finishes the turn.

There's an archer up there. I feel like they're going to get back up. They're not gone. He did not take them away. It is the captain's turn. The captain is holding his action. Oh! He has his weapons away.

But he's doing it. But he's essentially just waiting on the ship and just doing a slight pacing back and forth as he looks over in your direction and over the rest of the field. He will, as a bonus action, do Command from the Grave. So he commands one crew member within 120 feet. This one here turns, goes into a full move,

30, up to you. Just like, he hears the captain goes, after shouting, the rest, kill them. The one looks over, looks over just past you and just goes into an unnatural sprint. All of a sudden, this undead strength go through it, comes charging over the beach,

rushing up towards you. It's going to. Were you not close enough, sister? About for two? Yeah, you were five feet away from it, so. Okay. 10 feet, technically. So it's going to take two attacks at you with its longsword.

Imogen, no! That's going to be an 11. Miss! And a 15. Miss! Imogen, yes! Yes! Your mage armor deflects it off the side.

Up in front of you right there. That's going to finish the captain's turn. Now it is Imogen's go. Ugh. I wanted to do something so much cooler than just fucking kill one little skeleton. Well, I mean, that skeleton, anything could happen

to that skeleton in the next round. Get on up, I say. Get up! Just because I can't see it all, it looks like one person on the deck, one in round. You know, not by saying. Maybe not. Just because I can't see it all, it looks like one person on the deck, one in a crow's nest, and the captain? Correct. That we don't see, but you can see.

Could be more under in the hall. More hidden behind the sails. You guys are telling me. Come on. There could be more. I know. What'd you take an image of? On the layman's side.

On the poop. What if he attacks Laudna before I can? Interesting. I'm going to... The rocks on the ground around me are going to start shaking and they're going to float up and start spinning around my head again. Rocks.

And... Thank you. I'm going to, bonus action, push the skeleton away from me. Okay, strength save, right? Yes. That is going to fail. All right. Four.

And then when I do that, two of the meteors are going to slam into him. All right, he gets a dex save for those? Yes. Two saves against each one? Yeah. First one's a fail. Second one is also a fail, a four and an eight. Okay, great. All right.

So that's 4d6 fire damage. 11, 13, was that a three? Let's go with that, it was a three. 16 points of fire damage. 16 points of fire damage. Bones splinter off. You can see the portion of where it's armor was collapses inward and the metal's dented

from the impact and the flames burn up the side. It looks hurt, but it's still standing. Can I move back and get up onto the rock behind me? Yes, you can. How high can I get? Yeah. You can get up there, probably. Does it look like it reacts any kind of way to the fire?

It gets hurt by it. It doesn't seem like it's resistant to it. That's what you're watching, I suppose. Yeah. All right. So that finishes your turn, Imogen? Yes, sir. All righty.

So now, the one up here in the crow's nest. Somebody jump in the whirlpool. You're walking right towards it. See what happens. The one in the crow's nest. Somebody jump in the whirlpool. Vodna seems to be walking right towards it. See what happens. The one in the crow's nest, as you glance up, you see it in shadow as it sits up a bit and leans into the edge. This skeleton is blackened.

The actual bone itself is a soot color. You can almost see the veins of a reddish light through it. It's a molten skeleton in some way. You can see it has this heavy sash over its shoulder, and what looks to be a partially armored breastplate that's only over one shoulder. The skull sits in there, and you can see it has this long other strap that seems to be embedded

in the back of the skull. It dangles down in the front as it pulls up this massive heavy crossbow and aims in like a sniper shot from above. It's going to use its bonus action sniper to give itself advantage on the next attack. It's going to make two heavy crossbow strikes. Two?

Yeah. One of them's going to be at FCG. Bring it. One of them's going to be at FCG. Bring it. One of them's going to be at you. Oh. So at FCG, it has advantage on the strike. Natural 20. Yeah! That's crazy.

Second one! You didn't even need advantage on it. Natural 20 to natural 19 on advantage on that shot. I mean, I'm getting some good rolls. Let's keep it going. Nice, nice. And then the one against you, that's going to be a 22 to hit. Hits. All righty.

Some good rolls there. Oh boy. All right, so against you, FCG. Let's go. You're off. I didn't even see the guy. It's a crit, however. I will negate the crit by asking. What?

I'm just going to ask you to negate the crit. Oh, you can do that? Yeah, I just am. I'm just asking you out of personal favor. No, it's not going to work, sorry. No. Be a best friend. No.

That's going to be 18 piercing damage. Doubled? No, 18 piercing damage. And 36 cold damage. Oh my god! That's a robot. As the crossbow releases, this burst of bluish magical energy

just scatters off of it, and you just... 54? When the heavy bolt hits FCG, it almost pushes you back five feet and you almost pin into the beach itself for a second as you have to get yourself back up onto your wheel. And it is through your torso, poking out the back. Oh no, it pierced my metal!

Oh, shnag. How bad are you? 34. Okay. Liar. All righty. That finishes their go. Did he hit you or he missed you? Oh, he did roll damage on me. That's right. And then for you.

You should do it. No, wait a minute. Keep going. That's cool. You take 11 points of piercing damage, reduced to five because of your form, and five points of cold damage. Which I take all of. Yes, you do. Finishing their go, it now goes to the crew members' turn.

All the water is the crew members' pieces reattached and they all get right back up out of the water. No! That's what you need to deal with. I know. I've got to become the captain. You've got to get up. You've got to talk? I've got to get up. We You got to get a guy. He won't die. You got to talk? I got to get a guy.

We got to reach in and pull his gonads out. They can only move half speed. And then they can pick a card. Is it their action to reform? Nope. At the start of their turn, they regain hit points. Shit. Shite.

There we go. When are you going in? Huh? It's my turn? Yeah, it's got to be way before the show. Oh, well then, yeah. Yeah, I know, I just got to get there. Look at the wheel. Yeah, charm him.

This one's going to dash with its action to just scoot past. It is going to go past you, Laudna. Uh-huh. It ignores you, but it remains in combat with you. Actually, this one's going to keep going up to here. You do get an opportunity attack if you want to against the one that goes by.

The one from Merlo? If you want to take it. I just punch him? You haven't gone yet. You can if you want to. I have negative strength. Do it, who knows what's going to happen? Punch a ghost.

What could possibly happen in the middle of a parlay with a ghost captain? Yeah, that's the thing. I don't want to know. Then don't, okay. That's just the question was there. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. He's going to bait me. An FCG hasn't gone yet.

I'm about to. Should we threaten them? Those two can't strike. This is going to be a threat to the destroyer. This is going to do it. This one, which can go, is going to rush up to you. This one's going to one, two, three, and it's going to dash up to here as well.

This one's going to run up to the top of the mountain after you. Me? Yes. Me? Yeah. So that's going to be... Two of them are going to attack you twice, and the other two are going to attack you twice. The other two are going to attack you twice. Awesome.

Just going to rushing up with unnatural speed, slashing at you twice, FCG. That's going to be 20 to hit. Hits! Other one is a natural one. Ha ha! Misses! All right, so that one is going to be Oh man.

Over here. Eight points of slashing damage and one cold. That one is going to be over here. Eight points of slashing damage and one cold. Other one's attacking you twice. Natural one. And a natural 20. Wow, get it back to back. Woo! Jeez! That will be... That's his going. He's got to go after all these.

Stop it, Matt. 14 points of slashing damage and six points of cold damage. Then four against you. Yep. That'll be 15 to hit. Misses. 14 to hit.

23 to hit. That hits. And 19 to hit. And that hits. Okay. So for that, you take six points of slashing damage reduced to three and two points of cold. So that's five. Five.

And then that is going to be 10 points of slashing damage reduced to five and five points of cold. 15 points of damage. There you go. That finishes their go over there. The two that are on you are going to roll for twice each of them.

Actually, only one of them can, so it's going to be 17 to hit. Misses. And that's going to be a 24 to hit. Definitely hits. That will be nine points of slashing damage and three points of cold. So four, so seven. Seven.

And the one that rushed up to you, Imogen, two strikes on you, that's going to be 14 to hit. And 12 to hit. Same one, it's just climbing up the hill, like and striking out. And as you dart backward, your mage armor is flashing in places as it deflects the blade and its claws, it swipes out at you.

It's just clambering up the hill and the rock after you and just can't seem to get hold yet. Finishing their go. Now it is FCG with Fearne on deck. All right. Surrounded and harried by undead, I assume, creatures, I will take my coin and flip it up into the air above us and just mutter a quick prayer, Changebringer.

No offense to Laudna, but can you please shine your light and wipe these evil dead souls off the face of this flat planet? Yeah. these evil dead souls off the face of this flat planet. I will cast Turn Undead slash Destroy Undead. Okay. All right. So what's the DC on this? It is a 15.

15. Starting over here. It's at 30 feet, right? 30 feet. Yeah, so over here. That is a success. Wait, hold on. No, they have no wisdom bonus. That is a success. Wait, hold on. No, they have no wisdom bonus.

That is actually just a fail. So he is turned. That one? Or destroyed. Also a fail. What's the, they are CR2, technically. Oh. So. Well, then they're just turned. They're just turned.

Just getting turned. All right, that guy there. Because wait, what level are we? We're 10. That's a fail. We're 10. Yeah, a fail. We're 10. Yeah, so it's one or lower. Next one. It's two. I'm going to destroy it.

Turn. One behind Laudna. Man, now they're rolling shit. Good. Good death. Turn. Just looking for a rat! One next to Orym. Natural seven.

Turn. Do I have to roll again? Yes, you do. Man, all of them fail. They are all currently afraid of you. Turn two. We're going to spend this turn trying to move it far away. Can't willingly move to the space.

What's up? I rolled a natural one. A natural one. You are also afraid. Of FDJ. Well, I'm immune to fear. So then, don't even worry about it. It just feels weird. Aren't they immune to fear? I'm just afraid, how does that work? It's not fear. It's just turn. It's turn on dead. It's turn, it's not fear. That's right,

so then it wouldn't. So turn on dead here. Yeah, it must spend its turns trying to move as far away from that as can. What can cancel that? So it's technically not fear. How do you undo? If you attack a creature that has been turned, do they have to stop turning or do they keep turning?

There's nothing they can do. It's one minute or until it takes any damage. Okay, until it takes any damage. As far away from you as it can, it can't willingly move to a space within 30 feet of you. It also can't take reactions for its action. It can only use the dash action or try to escape for an effect that prevents it from moving.

If there's nowhere to move, the creature can use the dodge action. So you just have to run into the ocean, basically. Yeah. And into the hands of Captain Novos backwards, so von. So von. Shit. Well.

So even the terrifying divine presence of the change bringer washes through your undead spirit and you feel this icy grip in your body that perhaps you are Nethmed of the gods and their presence means that you're also pinned for destruction. And you just feel this urge to just get the hell away from whatever's behind you as fast as you can.

Gods hate me. That's your action. That is my action. Trying to see, does anything Undo turn undead? One minute or until they take damage. But there's no remove curse, no greater restoration, dispel magic? This is one of the drawbacks,

one of the few situational drawbacks of the Halloween. I got it. Okay. They can't take reactions, so I'm going to use my movement to just scoot back five feet. All right. And that's all I can do.

Oh, maybe as a bonus action, I'll sip this here health potion. Will you let me do that for a bonus action? Oh, all right, sure. Okay. It's in your hand. Five points. Plus two.

Seven points. All right, pass that back over here. So that finishing FCG's good. That brings us to Fearne with Orym on deck. All right, so this is a little different. So they cannot attack us at this point? No. In fact, if we attack them, that's a problem.

If we attack them, they come back to us. Okay. So what I'm going to do, I'll change these things a bit. There are the three over here that were unaffected and those on the ship that were unaffected. Yeah, one on the ship. That's a ship. Really powerful.

Can you take me with you? To the ship. To the whirlpool! That creates a problem for me, but okay, yeah. Okay. We can incapacitate Laudna. Don't just move. No!

Well, otherwise, she's just going to keep running into the ocean. You just have to tap her. Just have to tap her. It's fine. I'm going to get to the boat in one turn. Where is Laudna? What about for the rest of the minute?

We're going to jump over the edge of the boat and keep going. I'm not having a lovely conversation. You have to keep moving. Oh, I have to's just a conversation. You have to keep moving. Oh, I have to keep moving? Yes. You will be running into the ocean forever. Unless Fearne smacks me. For a minute.

For a minute. It's not that long. For a minute. Or up and over through the boat. There's a lot of people who can smack you before your turn, it's okay. All right, can I just dash back and forth? No, it has to be as far away from you as possible. Far away from you. I Sorry, wait for me.

I'm letting you game this enough as it is. So. Okay. I game it enough? What are you talking about? What am I trying to game at all? No, not you. Me. Yeah, everyone.

People who are understanding the specifics of Turn Undead. You died. But yeah, Fearne. Okay. I am going to cast Fire Shield on myself. Nice. So you just see wispy flames are wreathing around my body.

And it's a bright light in a 10-foot radius and dim light for an additional 10. And I'm doing a warm shield instead of a cold shield. So I have resistance to cold damage. Nice. And I'm going to... Hang on, let me check something real quick. All right, I'm going to start running to Laudna.

Okay. Technically run over Orym, because Orym can fit under her. Now, in order to get to her, because this area is currently all blocked by skeletons, you could try and leap over them if you want to try. Sure, maybe I'll try a little mirthful leap situation. Sure, make a strength check for me.

Okay. It's a DC 10 on this, just to try and,'ll try a little Mirthful Leap situation. Make a strength check for me. Okay. It's a DC 10 on this, just to try, because you have the Mirthful Leap ability. I'll say, the DC 10. Okay. I mean, we'll say an athletics check. Athletics check? Okay. Just like.

Oh, dang it, it's a nine! Nine? Nine! Nine! So you rush up and just, you end up kicking off one of the legs and you land there. They're just blocking your way as they're all turning around.

Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me! Okay. Okay, so I took the action of that. Is there any way I can try to move a little bit more? Not through them, unfortunately. You can move five feet this way. They just blocked the path there with their swarm. That's what I'm saying.

I'm going to hang out there. I'm going to hang out there, and I'm going to have Mister start making his way to Laudna. All right. And... What'd you get, you clergatch? Oh, buddy.

2d6 cold damage. What's Mister doing? Okay, Mister, I could Dimension Door Laudna. I could Dimension Door you, Laudna, with Mister. You mean the flame teleport? Flame teleport. But she'll just keep running from where she is. She's just going to keep running.

Shit! Okay, all right. So Mister's going to try to go forward and shoot some flame seeds at the captain. That's true. At the captain, okay. I don't know if he can reach. What's the distance on it?

You don't really breathe, right? It is. I breathe. Yep, It is. I breathe. Yep, it is. Slowly, very slowly. One breath, one breath a day. 60 feet. 60 feet.

As he throws his flame seed, it arcs into the ocean water just below deck. All right, all right, all right. Where is Mister? Mister's over right here next to Laudna. Okay. Shit! Okay, all right, that's all I can do.

That's my turn. I know, I thought it was going to just hurt you or something. That's my turn. That's your turn, all right. Finishing first go, Orym, you're up, Ashton, you're on deck. Okay, total chaos everywhere. There's way more powerful people here

and problem on the boat, so Orym looks at all the tall people and legs and skeletons, and he's just going to chance it, and he's going to run under Fearne, under this feller here, towards the water. All right, so five, 10, 15.

I will leap that way, which I can go the full 15 the rest of my distance with the boots. So that's my movement. And I'll use my action. Am I on foot still or am I swimming at this point? You're about knees deep in the water, so it's difficult terrain from this point forward. I'm going to wade in.

So that'll give me five, 10, 15. Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. The water is freezing cold. It is very, very cold. Okay. I want to go to the pirate ship right now. Crazy, okay. I was like, what?

It looks so beautiful. Action surge. Let's go. Use the bonus action to swing out Seedling and send a vine to the side of the ship, hopefully over that ladder. Okay. Okay. Okay.

And pull myself to the edge of the ship. So that's bonus action. Up to the side there. Oh, I'm down below. Okay. Oh, you want to get up to the very edge? I was hoping to, yeah. What's the range on that? It's 30 feet.

30 feet? Yeah. Yeah, you could definitely get that. And that was the bonus action. You are now up onto the ship and you are next to the one that was shouting, the very loud, high-pitched, shrilly voice. You could see a human skeleton, a female, with a wild bush of black, curly hair

that emanates from this bleached skull. After you attach and land on the side of the ship, the skull is grinning at you with its blue eyes, flickering flame. Okay. Shoot. I bolt. I'm going to start running this way.

Five, 10, 15, up, 20, 25, 30. Yes, let's go! Are you going to attack him? No. And then I will use my action to... Well, you've already used... So you Action Surge, which gives you an action, which you just used to dodge.

Action Surge, oh! There's no movement attachment. Oh, it's not a whole other. Oh, okay. Wait, rewind then, because I zipped up. Yeah, it's not a whole different turn. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's not a whole different turn. You're right.

From where he is, can Orym tell who the captain is at this point? We don't think it's the guy on the deck. Yeah, no, we spotted him. He was the- This one's been shouting orders from that point. Okay. And this one over here,

speaking about the captain in a third person. Okay. Did everybody get that? Oh man. I might as well. I can't, I'm not in the right... Up to 15, I'm just not in the right position. Do I have any more movement?

Could I get one more square that way? Or am I out? Am I tapped? It's a... Seed. Fucked up. more square that way, or am I out on my tap? It's up to you. Let's see. Five. Five, ten, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 30, 35. Was your movement? 30. 30, so it was there.

That was movement, then action to do another 15. Then you did the leap, right? The leap, right, which is 15 feet? Yeah, that's all part of my movement. Right, so that's all your movement. So it's going to be the question of whether or not I know. Sorry. So it was movement, and then it was an action to do the...

I thought I got only like yay far, and then I needed to use my action to get even further. That was to get me within reach of using the vine. Right, and so then you moved over here for that. Yeah, and that ended the whole turn, so the next. Correct, and so then you moved over here for that. Yeah, and that ended the whole turn. So the next. Correct. So the action surge would get you right there. Okay, so that's as far as I go.

All right, then I will just lay in. Okay. Natural 20. Let's go! Yes! And a one, which I'll reroll for 17. 17 hits. Okay, let's make it... Do they have any weapon in hand?

They do. They have, it looks like, a short sword in one hand and a pistol in the other. Pistol in the other, okay. I will make the first goading attack. So that's a four to eight, a six, a 14, plus the... There's a total of 22 for the first hit. All righty.

And they have to beat Wisdom, 17. Goating attack? Goating it. That's 15. So fail. And then I'll do a disarm attack and try to knock their gun into the water. You got it.

So that's a... Disarming is strength. All righty. Two, six, eight, yes. 17 for the second hit. 21 on the strength, that's 19. So they held onto their gun, they took 17 more points of damage.

Nice. So both strikes, a heavy hits them, you hit the pistol, and it knocks it out of their grip, and they catch again in the air. The skeleton, still looking down at you, looks back up past you over the top and goes, Captain! Looks like we've got boarded by a flea!

He calls you Flea. I call me Flea. I finished your turn? Yeah, sorry for the lag. I've confused my economy. Ashton, you're up. Okay, question. I know. I've confused my economy. Ashton, you're up. Yay! Okay. Question, I know I've seen this spell before. Yeehaw.

Did Laudna also do the shift the way the rest of the skeletons did? She was already moving this direction, but you watch them all turn around. Make a perception check. Okay. Or actually, no, insight. Make an insight check for me. Hmm.

Come on, me. Okay. Or actually, no, Insight. Make an Insight check for me. Hmm. Come on, baby. 16. 16? You notice that I'm in the wave of an out, and you watch the Defect Laudna once before. All the skeletons turn around, and right as Laudna goes, and goes into a skittering run

that's different than a normal skittering run. Well, shit. Okay, I'm going to gently push through these guys. I'm going to scooch through these guys straight ahead of me. Can I just push through? Unfortunately, you cannot. You have to find a way to shove them or move around them. All right, let's go. Can she turn into water again? Can you get me to the ship?

Let's see. I can't see, hold on. That's all right. Five, ten. I mean, either offer the compass, threaten the compass, or... If I can go around, I'll do a little hop off that rock to try and, to try and, I'll just do, like, not all the way up,

I'm just going to try and parkour my way around. Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35. And then drop down, jump down. Parkour! Jump down. There we go. Okay. And I'm just going to straight palm to the back of the head, just pop.

Oh, Jesus. Okay. Go ahead and roll with your strength and proficiency bonus. I was going to say, of the head, just pop. Okay, go ahead and roll. Roll just with your strength and proficiency bonus. I was going to say, well, actually, I have an unarmed strike. Can I reel in how much damage I do, or is it just the amount of damage I do? It's just the amount of damage you deal. Cool wins.

You're raging, so I'll say yeah. Yeah, no, no, no. That's 18 to hit? Yeah. Okay, take your eight damage. Eight damage. Eight points of plus your damage as you just get palm knocked in the back of the skull.

I need for my team. But that gripping divine fear that pierced into your spirit gets knocked from your head as you can shake yourself out of your... I just immediately, still in my form of dread, turn to FCG and just go, Respect the gods!

And then, last question. Yeah? This is not quite 60 feet, is it, between me and the guy with the crossbow? No, they seem a little further than that. Shit, and I'm out of movement, aren't I? You are at the moment, yeah. I only have that one.

Can I do anything fucking else? Ah! There's a skeleton in the immediate right of you. Yeah, but they're all clearly fucking running, right? They are at the moment, yeah. Yeah, I'm going to, can I hold? That's not an action, I can't hold one attack. No, unfortunately.

No, that's a. Okay. I have no more movement. I got another marble. All right. The captain glancing over the side there, continues to pace and walk, glances over the shoulder at the shout of the flea that's joined the ship and gives a weird grin.

The teeth crack a little bit as the jaw seems to twist to a ghostly smile. Another bit of the water in the ocean begins to swirl. All righty, that brings us to this one on the ship next to you. Don't worry, Captain. I'll take him. They're going to use bonus action. to this one on the ship next to you. Don't worry, Captain! I'll take him! They're going to use bonus action,

the captain's orders. Bomb me, bomb me. This crew member here is going to immediately go and try to attack you. That's going to be a 21 to hit. Ugh. Ugh. Is that me? No, it's Imogen. No, it's me.

You take six points of slashing damage and three cold. Ugh. Is that me? No, it's Imogen. No, it's me. You take six points of slashing damage and three cold. Okay. Then it's going to switch back around after shouting the order and then go into two strikes against you. Pop me with, pop me with. Natural one.

Ooh, a lot of natural ones. Natural 20! That's twice in the same battle! I've gotten both back to back. That's crazy. Nice, he's done that. 20 and a one? Yeah, that's wild. What? A lot of 20s tonight. Damn, damn.

All righty. That'll be 14 points of slashing damage and 12 points of cold damage. 26 total, gotcha, gotcha. Woof. The first one goes wide, and right as you are getting your bearings, you duck the first one, bring the shield up, and you suddenly can't see it, and then underneath the shield, it's crouched

down to almost like a cockroach, lower-level, and just carves you up the front with a short sword. All right, that's going to finish their go. Bring it to Chetney. Yeah, let me march back. I'm just going to make a beeline for the boat, knowing I'll take attacks of opportunity. That's 10 feet before you get to the difficult terrain. Both of them get attacks of opportunity against you. That's going to be an 18. That's my AC.

That does barely hit you. And that's going to be a 12. Beautiful. So one of them does hit you for nine points of slashing damage and six cold. So it'd be five and so. Five, 11. 11, yeah. Gotcha.

All righty. So that's five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. What's your full movement? It's 35. 35. So it's about as far as you can get right now, just starting to swim through the water. It's now up to your chest. Am I within 30 feet of the guy up near Orym?

Could I eyeball it? They're a little bit outside of 30 feet. Okay, I will continue just to swim towards the hull of the ship. I'll keep going. We're going to board right. 30, 35. I'll say with the hull of the ship. I'll keep going. We're going to board right. 30, 35. I'll say with the five feet from the previous one,

that does go into an additional one, and you're on the side, and that's as far as you got, but you're right there. Cool, cool. Claws out, clung to the exterior of this rotted wood as your fingers almost sink in because it's soft. Ugh. All right, that finishes your go.

Laudna, you're up. Okay. Oh fuck. I'm going to start running to the ship, avoiding the whirlpool. Okay, which direction? Let's go through the middle of the two whirlpools. All right.

Don't. 15, 20, 25, 30. As you're now waiting waist-high in the water, and now it's turning into difficult terrain. I'll dash. All righty. I'm going to keep up the illusion that I'm still turned from FCG.

Okay. So I'm still running frantically. All right. As you're now running and now swimming into the water, you glance above the edge, you can see the dwarven captain still pacing, but keeping an eye on you, just patiently watching.

Just looking at him with fear in my eyes. Okay. Finishing your go is now the captain's go. The captain is still holding his action because of your persuasion roll and is going to bonus action command from the grave. Give me a ride. I tell him.

He is going to go ahead and command. Please, please. Zipper, please. Heart. This one. Oh. 20, 25, and leap here to 30. Got to go back.

Clamber up at the, oh god. There we go. Stay, buddy, there we go. All right, and it's going to attack you for natural one. I'm just swinging wide this battle. The angel of his ping pong. No joke.

All righty, that's wild. All right, so he's going to finish his go. That brings us back to Imogen. Oh god. Hmm? Okay, hold on. Yeah. That's dumb.

There's no point in that. Hold on! Are the whirlpools holding in size, or does it look like they're growing or shrinking at all, or moving? The whirlpools look like they're staying for the time being. Kind of moving this a little bit closer now

that we're moving down the battlefield. I'm going to get a little closer to you all. Okay. I'm going to look at these two fuckers in front of me. And my eyes are going to flare white and I'm going to say, back the fuck off! And I'm going to cast Shock Flare at 3rd-level. Okay.

Does that dexterity save for them? Strength save. Strength save. Oh, that's a natural two. Two natural twos in a row. Great. Then they both take 4d6 lightning damage. Nice.

It's not that much. Four, 12 points of lightning damage to each of them. It blasts outward. This one falls back and collapses into a pile of bone at the bottom of the rock hill. Great. And for my bonus action, I, my bonus action, I will use two more meteors

and slam them into the skeleton still standing. You got it? That's dexterity save? Yes. I didn't get that. Are you sure? Yeah, I'm a dexterity save? Yes. I didn't get that. Are you sure? Yeah, I'm going to use dexterity save. That's a 10, failure. And that's going to be a 15. Does that fail? They both fail.

All right, both fail. I'm going to stop rolling these dice because I keep getting the same numbers. 14 points of fire damage on that. They both get blasted back. One catches the rock. The other one gets thrown off the edge and crumbles into a pile of shattered bones and armor.

As the other one's pulling itself back up, both meteors and it goes arcing in the air where its torso pulls apart from the rest of its skeleton and it falls into two pieces about five feet from each section. Oh, they're going to get right back up. You got movement.

I do. I can't do that, it's a spell, Chet! I think you just do the move. I'm saying toot. Just toot. Psychic toot. I'm going to get up on the high rock. Up on your high horse?

Yeah. Can you collect the, yeah, actually, did we collect the hole or did we leave the hole up there? The hole is up there. As you climb up onto the edge, I will say make a dexterity saving throw. Oh no! My fault.

Where'd she go? That's 18. 18? You get up the edge and have to catch yourself and walk around the edge. It's just a massive hole in the top of the rock. I'm actually going to just hang down. Okay, so you vanish into it.

Which gives you total cover while you're hanging there. That's great. So there you go. No images! It's like a Broadway trapdoor. Yep. As long as nothing happens. All right. I'm hanging on.

Yeah, you're right. Here comes the sniper, yeah? That's what I'm hanging on. Yeah, you're right. Here comes the sniper, yeah? That's what I'm just doing. It's just a sniper. Yeah, no cookball. It's so bad. I just can't even make it up. Dizzy.

Adel. Adel. It's so awkward. It's just so weird. What have you gotten? That's just like short out. The sniper's about to rain. The sniper puts in another large bolt,

pulls it back, gets down, and aims out past everyone to you once more. I'm just a sweet boy! You send the entirety of the crew running in a wave of divine movement. He doesn't know that! I mean, I guess I do think I'm a pretty big hero. It was very visible.

It was extremely visible. Bonus action. Sorry, baby! There was a speech involved. Bonus action to Sniper. Gives an advantage. There was a speech involved. Bonus action to Sniper. Give us an advantage. There was a speech involved. That's going to be a 20 to hit. Hits!

All righty. I do love how we could stand out in the open with a sniper and a nest. There's all these nice cover. Yeah, there's plenty of cover out there. Do I get half cover from all of his friends? Nope, no, you do not. That is going to be 12 points of piercing damage

and 14 points of cold damage. I'm down. Oh! Unconscious? Unconscious. Wow. You hear once more the the massive bolt just streaks through the high-pitched whine and FCG gets blasted and tumbles.

Poof, poof, poof, poof, poof, poof, poof. And skids into it. Does the undue turn undead? I'm going to double-check the rules. Laura, help. Oh no. Laura, wait. Not image, it's just Laura. Oh no.

Taking some fucking cover. Goddamn it. Trees are in danger. Don't think about it. One minute. Until it takes damage. So yeah. So one minute. Even while you're unconscious, they didn't even see it happen.

They're all still running from you. They're running from my god, not from me. Yeah. Yeah, okay. All very humble. God fucking damn it. You are now laid out on secondary bolt, just sticking out of your torso right now. Still don't know how to.

Did he take more than one shot on me? I am now pointing at that motherfucker. It's going to reload. Up, and to take a secondary shot. Some bitch. I am pointing at him. This is going to be at... Down onto the deck, because you're now the other immediate threat.

I thought they were both coming. That'll be the end of it. Great. That's going to be 13. Ha ha ha! Sh-boom! Splinters the wood. Shards of it go flying around you as it sticks about six inches out of the deck. Taller than me. Yeah.

All right, that finishes their go. Goddamn it. FCG's down. I'm down! Goddamn it. Actually, you know what? I can do it. They're going to step up. Cliff dive? And then. Oh! Whoa!

You got boots? Over to the other top there. Goddamn it. Jack's going to be hopping around? Motherfucker, I have plans. I'm not going to save your butt. All righty, finishing their go. The rest of the crew. I'm back, baby. Goddamn it. All righty. Finishing their go, the rest of the crew. Oh boy, this is not happening.

We were at 10, 15. I hate them. They can only get up that far. Great. It's been half their movement to get there. They're both going to dash with the rest of it. Great. I wish, of course, I had zero fucking bamf. They both fall into the hole.

You're holding onto the edge, they both go over top and they fall down 10 feet, both of them taking... Is this into our hole? They both take enough damage to fall in and then immediately slump around again. Wait, can you just like, yes, yes, yes.

Fold it and those guys we can. Fold it. Those guys are handled for a minute. We can open that at any time. Two out. These guys just plow it over here into the water. That's pretty good. Oh god. God fucking damn it.

They're just running up behind you, splashing into the water. Look out, Laudna. These two do run away, getting attack opportunity from either of you, splashing into the water. Look out, Laudna. These two do run away, getting attack opportunity from either of you, if you'd like. Yeah, I'll take that. No, never mind. They won't stop running. That's right.

I'm like, ah, no. Let them keep running. Yep, just doing the, Let them keep running. Both of these guys just go running way off the side. Let them run. Okay. Let have rods. They are just bolting away.

And this one here, who's still good, is going to turn. I don't know if I'm going good. Half-weaver? Just this little baby. This little skeletal halfling is like, and just comes like, just. Fuck. No, no, no, no. Like little baby zombies in Minecraft. He's like. He just comes like.

Fuck. Like little baby zombies in Minecraft. They're like. Yep. Get away! What's the name of Hook's sidekick? Smee? Smee, that's what it is. There you go. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

But it took its action to dash to get there, so it just runs up to you. At the base of you. Finishing their go now, FCG, you're up with Fearne on deck. I'm up? Yep, I need you to make a death saving throw. All right. Nope. Wow. First fail.

Wow. Wow! All righty. Fearne, your go. Okay. I'm confident. Don't give a bit. I'm confident. Stand by. You know why? Because I've got the gods.

Can you use my tattoo? I do want to use your tattoo. I'm just wondering if I'm going to be petty because of what he did to Lagna. I'm not going to be petty. Death is permanent. Are these the deaths?

Yeah, the dark ones. It can be any petty. Okay. What you got? I am going to cast Cure Wounds on this dumbass. And I'm going to do it at second level, maybe? I'm going to do it at second level.

All right, so it's 2d8 plus your wisdom. Just one. I know. It can be the most basic one. No, no, no. All I need is one hit point. I'm going to do Cure Wounds at first level. That's fine, that's fine. All right, so 1d8, plus your wisdom. What if you get hit immediately?

She'll have to do it again. It's enough to take out a second level heal. Okay. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Eight points. Amazing. So you come out of consciousness, two bolts sticking two feet out of your torso.

Get up, get up! Why are you mad at me? Because you just, look what you did to Laudna. You just threw everything off. I'm sorry. It's all right, it's all right. Do you want me to be dead again? Can we get them out of the way? All right, it's all right. Do you want me to be dead? It's so sad! Can we get them out of the way?

Is there a... All right. So, okay, so that was my action. So then, as a... Nice. That's a post-death burp. Yep. I don't think I can, no. Shit. All right. When I was dead, I realized. As a bonus action. Shit I was doing it, I realized.

As a bonus action. Shit, I had a lot of gas. I believe, can I do a second level bonus action? You've already cast a spell with your actions, so you can only do a bonus action that's a cantrip, unfortunately. Got it, okay. Stand by.

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. All right, I'm just going to do Caleb's produce flame, can't you? And I'm just going to put my hand. Is it a bonus action? Oh god. Oh no, it's not a bonus action, I'm sorry. Let me see.

No, it's not a bonus action, what am I doing? There you go. Anything with this little fucker next to me. All right, I'm just going to... If I try to attack the little guy, am I able to also do my movement? I don't know why I'm having such a brain fart. You can move still, yeah.

Okay, so what I'm going to do is I'm going to melee attack the little guy. Well, you've used your action to cast Cure Wounds. What am I doing? Okay. That's a go. I'm going to keep walking towards the boat. Okay. And then.

20, 25, the one that ran up to you goes, and strikes out with an opportunity. And I have 35 feet of movement. So move you to about there. All right, so that one's going to attack you. That's going to be a 14 to hit. Does not hit. Does not hit. But because of my fire shield,

and if he took a melee attack at me, he takes damage. Ah. Can I do this? Hits you with melee attack, so it has to hit you to take the fire damage. Can't be that. I don't understand any of this. All right, and now Mister. Where's Mister?

Mister is right over here. Oh, hi. I'm going to have him go as far as he can, I guess around that way. Goddamn it. What's wrong? What's wrong? Little fucking skeleton there, fucker. Is there one that I'm missing?

There's a skeleton right next to FCG. Oh, oh, yes. That one's not turned? No, and he's going to attack you. That's the one that's going to go kill you again. Flame Seed at him. Go for an attack. Yeah. Okay. It lashes out at you and misses.

Thank you, thank you. And immediately turns back to the metal man on the ground. 22. That hits. Gun roll damage. Okay. Scoop-a-doop-a-doop. Doop-doop-doop. Ooh! Ooh, poo-stoo.

Okay. Ooh, what's poo-stoo? 13. 13 points of damage. Now Entry's flaming turd is burning on its shoulder. All right. That's my turn. That's my turn.

All right, finishing burns go. Up to the round. Orym? Cool, I'm going to grab hold of this giant crossbow bolt in the deck and swing around into the enemy next to me and try to do a pushing attack into the water. Whoa, I just dropped a diamond on the floor. Okay, so you swing around here. That is a 27 to hit.

27 definitely hits. Has to beat a DC 17 strength. This is a shove? All right. It's a pushing attack, 15 feet. Oh, pushing attack, that's right, okay. So has a 17 points of damage? No, 17. Oh, 17 strength. Is this a shove? All right. It's a pushing attack. 15 feet. Oh, pushing attack. That's right, okay. So has a 17 points of damage? No, 17. Oh, 17 strength. Strength save, yeah.

What was the damage on it? Oh, I didn't do it yet. Four plus 10 plus 12. 12 points of damage, and that's a natural 19. Oh, I will rebound off of it, hit the ground, and then just drive my shoulder and the blade in again and do it again. Okay.

Oh, that misses. That's 12. 12 misses, unfortunately. So the first one, you go ahead and strike and Captain! Gets back on, puts the blade ready. This one, it parries it to the side, and you both are in a standoff position. Hold ground.

Okay. Yep. Hold ground. Okay. Finishing your go. Ashton, you're up. I'm going to take my five, ten, I'm going to take my two steps to that little motherfucker. All righty. And I'm going to take a big, wide swing, straight at him, I'm going to reckless.

Brokei, baby, let's go. That's 16 to hit. 16 hits. Actually, 20 to hit, excuse me. Still hits? Yeah. Even more. Let's do some damage. Let's do 20 points of damage.

20 points of damage. And it just breaks into the ground as you slam it upward. Scatters a bit across the sand. Thank you, Ashton. Is it going to be okay? and it just breaks into the ground as you slam it upward, scatters a bit across the sand. Thank you, Ashton. Is it going to be okay? Thank you, Ashton.

Grab the vertebrae and just throw it further into the water. Well, I mean, this is a question. I'm now going to teleport. You saved. How far can you teleport? 60 feet. Where do you want to go? Oh, we're going to have to eat now.

I want to head this way, like right by that, like how far can I? Okay, I can go that far. I want to go right to that, like right behind that icicle. What? On the other side. Over here? Like right on the other side of it.

A little further, here it says. Where's a stick? I have a stick. As long as, yeah, one back from that little whirlpool, it makes me nervous. Okay, there. And then I'm going to take a shot. I'm going to use a Wormhole Strike, mother fucker. Okay. At that goddamn bolt fucker. You heard me, goddamn bolt fucker.

You heard me, the bolt fucker. That's a 60-foot range? 60-foot range, should be there. 60-foot range, yep, they're within range. All right, this is going to be fun. What are we going to do? All right, just want to put aside all the dice I'm about to use for this shit. And then, sorry, I'm using a thing I never use.

Oh yeah, there we go. I didn't want to interrupt. Can I ret in a bonus second wind? Sure. Thank you. I'll burn a point to that. There we are. Oh, I can't do it that way. That's okay.

Go away. That's good, we'll do a 10. All right, so rolling my attack. Come on, don. Go away. That's good, we'll do the attack. All right, so rolling my attack. Come on, don't fuck up. Yeah, that went right. 12? 12. Oh wait, this one's cocked, thank fucking god.

Oh wow, that's way better. Sorry, this one's like, ah, okay. That was a journey. I was like, okay, I'm looking at it funny, thank god. Shit. 29. 29 definitely hits. Fuck.

Fuck, that scared me. So that's... Unleash the hounds. If this works. That's... 11 plus... That's 23 points of damage. And he gets shoved one square from forward

because the hammer's coming from behind. That's true. The other way. So back of the head. As it's getting the bolt ready for the second shot, you swing your hammer, and as you swing it partway through, your arms just vanish for a moment, and from behind, a portal opens,

and the hammer hits the sniper from behind, and they just tumble ass over tea kettle off the side. Yeah, that's some good rage, bro. Onto the deck. So how much damage was that? That was 23. That was 23. Plus... 50 feet to the ground. What is 50 points?

So that is... 56. Yeah. Okay. 15 points of bludgeoning damage. Sky. And it is prone. It hits the deck with a heavy thud.

Parts of the deck splinters up around it. And you see the skeleton's like. Is he not quite down? No, no, it's still standing. He's a hard one. Yeah. Goddamn it. The ones on the ship seem to be made of stronger, sturdier stuff than the regular crew members.

I still have some movement, which is disgusting, but true. 15, 20, 25, 28. I can't quite make it. Shit. Oh no. What a lackluster turn. That was fucking awful. I'm going to try and head back to FCG.

All righty. So 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35. Yep. Damn, what? Good for you. Globe-trotting motherfucker. All righty. Duty mansions. That's really cool. Duty mansions. All right.

This fucker hadn't gotten down to it would've been way worse. You didn't give me a high five. This would've been way crazier. Except the captain's still pacing and watching, and gives a nod to the water and the whirlpool. Oh! Nod? Yep.

Oh! Oh, it serves you right! Now the water's like. He's moved it. Wow. So, the boy moves underneath. We'll come to that on your turn. Okay.

Oh god. It is now Lutrol's turn. The one that's fighting you on the deck is going to go ahead and try and dance around to this side, saying, I know your game! And is going to attempt to do a shove strike on you. Go ahead and make an athletics check.

Oh, good. Let me double check and make sure if on you. Go ahead and make an athletics check. Oh, good. Let me double check and make sure if it's athletics or acrobatics. Keep coming back to this, but I just want to make sure. So don't get... Fuck, fuck, fuck. Is he pushing you, Orym? Yes.

So you make athletics or acrobatics, your choice. Do acrobatics, try to dodge. That is a 20. There you got a 20 as well. Well, I will use Zephyrn Heart. Well, 20 is meter beat, so you did actually beat it on the first strike. Okay.

Frustrated by how you just, they try and bash you in the side and you pull up the shield and you both just your feet slide about an inch, but it's barely any movement. Angrily, it's going to go ahead and spin around with its short sword and try and stab you over the shield. Shit.

That's pretty easy to do. That is going to be 12. Ooh! Raise the shield up higher. It's going to now shout over here the captain's orders to the one next to it. And this one's going to be like, Make sure you shoot through!

And so we'll see whatever that gets to. You smell real bad. All right, that finishes its go. Chet and you're up, Laudna, you're on deck. Oh, can I try? Actually, you're getting a turn because you're in the water. The freezing ice cold waters around you

begin to just cause your body temperature to drop deeply. You take... 10 points of cold damage. Ooh! This shit's cold around this boat. What? Good thing I've been doing cold plunges every morning before I joined the turn.

All right, now it's still your turn. What do you want to do? Fingers, claws in the hole, can I climb up the side and get up onto the deck? 20. 25 gets you right about there. Can I use the rest of my movement to get right over the guy that fell from the crow's nest?

Right up next to it. And with my action, can I reach down and try and wrestle that big fucking heavy cross, bro, out of his stupid hands? Sure, make an athletic, this would be a strength versus strength test. Okay, just a straight up strength roll. Yeah. Okay.

He's got no meat on his bones. Now you are transformed, which means you have advantage on the strength rolls, if I recall. That's even better, 23! 23. You rolled a natural 19, plus two, 21. Oh!

So it's on the ground, right as you clamber up onto the ship, it's getting up, it sees you, and it goes and grabs its crossbow and tries to start getting up as you get your claws onto it and just does a brief tug of war for you. Tear it free from its grasp.

Can I toss it into the waters over the ship? Yeah. I just. Spoosh! It hits the water and the water where it splashes through freezes up for a second before it gets to rapidly melt. Ooh. With my bonus action, can I use Blood Curse of Bloat and Agony

on the guy that Orym is fighting? Yeah, sure. The challenge is they don't have blood. Oh! Oh, jeez. Yeah. Can't bloat. Nope. Oh, jeez. Blood curses only affect creatures

unless their constructs are undead. They're way higher level. That's a higher level thing when you can blood the unbloodable. If you amplify it, where you use your own blood to channel it. Yeah, I'll scrape my body and I'll amplify it. My body!

Which I've never done before. Scrape that body for me! Six points. That's a rough one. People don't shake their butt. And it'll last for one minute. And that'll give him a disadvantage on strength and dex checks with you or Em.

Dex checks? Strength and dex checks, and one d8 if he makes more than one at the moment. But we're not saving throws. Checks. But strength checks was what he was doing for the show. Yeah, so that's an example of that curse. All righty, that finishes your go.

All right, finishing Chetney's go. Laudna, you're up. All right, I'm going to get to the boat. Can I go at an angle under him? 25, 30. Gets you there. You're swimming in the water. Am I able to Quicken a spell and spider climb?

Yeah, you can do that. And then dash the rest of the way? Yeah, you can do that. I'll do that. Let's talk. What is it that you're wanting me to discuss? Are we doing this now? Are we doing this now?

Is this the moment we're talking now? Do it. Do it! Peggy, still looking harried, the little damsel in distress-y, I grab him by his hand. And when taken as part of my Form of Dread, my ribcage opens a little. Oh, we're scared.

I take his hand and I put it inside of my chest. Oh. You're like me. Cursed like me. Ravshan, Gommor, Delilah, we can end it together, but you have to stop this now.

Make a persuasion check. Damn! Want your romance? Ha, ha, ha, ha! Ha, ha, ha, ha! Come on, don't. Come on, come on, come on. I'm so nervous. I'm so nervous. That's not good. That's not good, you guys.

11, uh, nine. Guidance. He withdraws his hand. I chose this curse. The Strife Emperor gave me renewed fury. What is it, Strife-en-ber? The Strife Emperor. The Strife Emperor.

So, what else do you offer, aside from returning what's mine and the lives of your compatriots? Wait, what was the first part? What else do you offer, besides returning what's his and the lives of our compatriots? That's going to finish your turn. You spend the rest of your turn

trying to understand what his little hand is. No, no, no, no. It's now the captain's turn. Consolidate, please. The captain little interesting. No, no, not bad day, no. It's now the captain's turn. Consolidate, please. The captain is still engaged in this conversation, so Hillsmen has turned continuing the parlay. Oh! Get up, get up!

Come on, come on fighter, get back in the parlay! What else do you have to offer? He's looking up at you, by the way. He's like a squat dwarf skeleton with the burning blue energy of the eyes and just like, bullshit roll. All right. Sucks. Oh wait, are we still talking? burning blue energy to the eyes and just like. Bullshit roll! All right. DT sucks.

Oh wait, are we still talking? Are we still talking? Yeah, he's taking his turn to continue the parlay. He's taking his turn to continue the parlay. Oh my god. He's taking his turn to continue the parlay. He's taking his turn to continue the parlay. He's taking his turn.

He's taking his turn, he's taking his turn. He's taking his turn. Getting very musical here. Okay. Follow the al a turn. It's getting very musical for you. Okay. Follow the Alibaba. I'm going to use Silent Image. Kirby doesn't need to make toys. To make the compass again. And then, I want to do it, I want to do it.

I'm willing to shift it again to look, I'm so sorry, to look like Chetney's possessed sword. It's a cursed sword. It's a cursed sword that talks to him. And so I figured it would go good with your whole aesthetic. The captain pulls forth his saber from his sheath, which you can see as it hits the air,

the moisture clings to it and creates ice crystals along the blade and goes, What's so special about this cursed sword? Make another persuasion check. Okay, okay, okay. Really good sword. You should have given her the The soul of the Larker. I was going to,

but then I used the term that I've used. That's a little bit better. 18. 18, and what's your response to his question. Trying to remember what the fuck his sword does. I don't even know if you know it's cursed. It's got the soul of a king trapped in it, that's all. I know that. I think that's been made pretty plain.

We all know that. It's got the soul of a king trapped inside of it. That's what we know. It doesn't matter what's true. It all matters what she says. Uh-huh. Okay. She's trying to try to get rid of the elbows.

Creeping creeper. We should have seen him today peeking his head in the testing room. It imbues him. You're putting on makeup, but you weren't getting dressed. I'm just going to specify. You should have seen him earlier when I was taking a shit. Insight check.

Hard to read. I just felt it was important to specify. I said it real bad out of context. The girl in the dressing room. Anyway. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Back to the scene. It abused him with the strength of a hundred holy men.

It could grant you radiant abilities. The same ones grant you radiant abilities. The same ones that cause your men to flee. Show me this blade. That's going to end his turn. Not this. All righty. That brings us to Imogen.

Mm! Mm-hmm. Let's go, Mo. Okay. Hey, Mo. I'm just going to peek my head about it. Come out of the little hole. Okay. How far am I within 120 feet of the ship?

Maybe. I feel like looking at it. At a glance, it could be. It's pretty close. So are they about to get up again? Yeah. Yeah. I'm coming out of the hole and I'm standing on the rock.

Right. But if you walk, you'll get closer. Would it take an action to pick up the scarf or is that something I can just do as I come up and out? Pick up the scarf? The scarf off the ground. Oh, the hole you mean? Yeah, would that take an action, or could I just?

It's an action, because it's grabbing the lips and taking it and folding it up. All right. In that case, I'm going to leave the hole on the ground and I'm going to come out and step down. All right. I think once I'm down on this next level, that's 120 feet.

Jeez whiz. Could be. Cheese whiz. Can I get a little closer there? Sure. To where I feel like I would be? There would be your movement. Okay. I love cheese whiz.

God, I love cheese. No, I do not love cheese whiz. I am going to Twin Spell. I like cheese. Choo-choo. And I'm going to choo-choo. Double lance the sniper and the dude fighting Orym.

Okay. 120 feet. Dang. Yarr. That is 85 there, so they're both within range. Sweet! Wow! Pew pew. Pew pew! Okay. So that's saving throw on their end?

Intelligence saving throw? Intelligence saving throw. All right. That's a fail. And ooh, that's pretty good, but that's still going to be a 17? 18. Fail.

So that is 7d6 psychic damage, and they both are incapacitated until the start of my next turn. That's great. That's a big one. One, two, hold on, let me find them. Two, three, four, five, six, seven. Yeah, that's way better.

12, 17, 19, 23, 26, 29 points of psychic damage to both of them. Both of those skeletons and crumple to the ground. Yes! Dead forever. Forever. Who's dead forever?

Both of them. Those skeletons who are dead forever. The one that you pulled the crossbow away from and threw it in the water, it starts getting back up and you don't even see what happened. You missed the crossbow. Those of you who are glancing over in the direction, you can see the air between Imogen and the ship

ripples rapidly. Whoa. Pop, pop. Does that finish your turn? Copy. I close. I can't use any more movement, can I? No, that was your movement to get down there, unfortunately.

Okay, okay, okay, yeah, that's what I'll do. Okay. That's what I'll do. Top of this turn, that one gets back up. But it's still incapacitated. So technically, incapacitating means that, hmm. It can't take any actions. It can't take any actions, but it can still get back up and move.

It's like. It glances at you, you see it's blackened, the skeleton crackling, and you can see the interior of it is almost like a molten bone. It's not going to move. Does that mean no reactions either? It can't do anything. Yep. not going to move. That mean no reactions either? It can't do anything. Yep.

So finishing that go. The rest of the crew keep running. Keep on running! Running back to the ship. Running back to the ship. Then they're going to run over the ship. This one here. Off the ship. Are they swimming?

Swimming, right? They're swimming through. Those two just go running into the bushes over that way. You can't reach them from here, it's fine. These two get back up and start climbing into the hole, then clamber down. Do they have half their movement? Half their movement to get up, and then they dash to get down, which means they can't do anything. Didn't they have to climb out of the hole? Yeah, so did you.

Yeah, but I was hanging. They weren't. It's not like a sheer wall. If you have things in there, they leap up and climb their way up. But it used up a lot of their movement, which is why they had to get up to the top and then dash to even get to you, so they don't even attack you at all.

Okay. I guess they're full round to even try and get to you. Great. This one gets up. And is immediately going to go after your FCG. But I'm a sweet, goddammit. Because you are prone, it has advantage. Even with advantage, it's a 15 on the first attack.

That misses. That misses. Second one with advantage. Come on, come on, come on. That's better, 19. Hit. All righty. Hey, I didn't use bonus, though, on my turn, right? That's true, you did not. Can I?

Again, a reset. That would be five points of slashing damage and four cold. I'm down again! No, you're not. Yeah. Shit, you're shit, Taylor! You should've given me that fucking second level!

Was he with the side feet of FCG? It wouldn't have fucking mattered. When I ended my turn? No, no, it would not have. Your turn still would have never come. It would have just hit you again. Okay. All right, because this one would already have fucking mattered. When I ended my turn, would I have? No, no, it would not have. Your turn still would have never come. It would have just hit you again. Okay. All right, because this one would already be down.

But I would still be alive right now. There it goes. You would be down because that fucker would be right on top of you. FCG? What are you talking about? The fucker who just killed you again. I know, but he just did enough damage. I had eight points.

He would have still been alive. They did nine points of damage. FCG. Death save. Oh, death save! This is an important roll, guys. I am going to do it. Oh, Jesus!

I'm going to do it. Why? With my special rolling device that's been here the entire campaign. What's that smell that just came out? What? This has always been a transformer. It's also a dice tower.

What? Oh my god. Six. No! Woo, woo, woo! What? That's just right. You don't drink out of those parts, man.

Back to one failed save. All righty. Fearne, you're up. At the top of your turn. I also forgot, I know it's too late now, but to know for next time, with my Enhanced Bond, when I do an extra d8 when Mister's out, I can also do it to restore hit points,

so I could have done an extra d8. Well, good thing to know for the future. Yeah. Top of your turn, because you are in the water and in the whirlpool, you do start feeling the freezing energy of the darkened ghost ships. Ugh. Cursed magic.

You take 10 points of cold damage. I have my fire shields. You can make it just five. Okay. And your movement is reduced even further. So it's considered difficult terrain, but your speed is halved, which means you can really only move five feet this turn. So.

It's like the water's just pulling you towards the center. Since I have Mister, can I use Fiery Teleportation? You can. All right, so I'm going to use Fiery Teleportation to 15 feet to try to get out of the whirlpool. Okay, so you both move five feet this way, probably.

I'm actually going to move to the side. All right. Because I feel like I need to. All righty, so burst of flame, and you both appear 15 feet over to that side. Okay. And I guess I wouldn't have known if FCG went down again. Oh yeah, because you're in a whirlpool

of hatred. Oh no. I pop out. If I see him, I see him laying down again. I was laying down when you went in. Here. Off of him, you would see it. I'll tell you what, make a perception check.

Okay. It's not like my body goes limp. Because I'm feeling him, you would see it. I'll tell you what, make a perception check. Okay. It's not like my body goes limp. Because I'm feeling really guilty, that's why. Maybe it's facing. That's okay. Rolls high. 16. 16?

I'll say 15 would have been the DC. I'm just glancing over and hearing the sound of FCG taking another hit, looking behind and seeing the other skeleton clawing at him and hitting with a blade. I'll be swearing loudly, too. That'll be some loud swearing. So I will make my way over there back to FCG.

So close to the ship! You don't have to heal me, I'll be fine. Someone else will heal me. All righty. I should get healed. Then the thing's going to get right the fuck back up. Yeah. I'm going to pump him up with a second-level Cure Wounds.

All righty. And... I get extra 3d8. 13. Hey! 13 hit points dealing to you, FCG. Does that finish your turn, Fearne? That finishes my turn. Orym, you're up. Okay. Thank you.

I get advantage on this, anything I do to this character, because it's unconscious, right? On the ground there? Yeah. That one is currently at zero hit points. I know that, but I've seen these things get back up, so I want to do something to it. You're good. Okay.

So I want to make a pushing attack. I want to jam my blade into the deck and then Jackrabbit kick it towards that side of the ship and then, Jackrabbit, kick it towards that side of the ship with a pushing attack. Okay, yeah. I'll reroll the wand. That is a 21 is the higher. 21.

Auto fails, so it gets shoved to there. 15 feet. 15 feet? I think that's off the ship. Yes! That's the thing with fleas. Really fucking strong legs, and then I'll turn and approach the other one. I'll get right next to Chet, actually.

Right next to Chet? Yep. All righty. And I'll just attack. That is a 15 to hit. 15 just hits. Just hits, pushing attack. Strength save, 17. Natural 19, I keep getting natural 19.

It's incapacitated. It's incapacitated. Yeah, you're right. So I'll say that. It can't take any actions, but I think it still gets saves against things. It doesn't auto-fail saves, I don't think. I'll double check. Okay.

I'll double check. Regardless. How do you do? I'll double check. Regardless, it takes 17 points of damage. Understood. Back of the moon. Can't take actions or reactions. Correct, so yeah, it can still save. Okay. That's fine.

Okay, so anyway, all that being said. So yeah, anyway, that was a natural 19. Okay, so it's still on the ship, but I hit it for 17 points of damage? Which knocks it back down to zero. For another six seconds. Oh, no. All righty, does that finish your turn?

Yeah, I'm out. Tap. All righty. Ashton, you're up. You think you can handle this? Yeah, go! Okay, I'm going to hit that tiny little motherfucker that's sitting there, and I'm going to do a reckless attack, because that's fun,

for 29 to hit. Your minimal damage knocks him out. Okay. He's down? He's down. Like, you could roll the worst you can possibly roll and he's. I'm going to go get our shit. I'm going to teleport 60 feet over

there to just behind those two skeletons. Right there. Am I within striking distance? The one right there, yeah. And now I'm going to use that second hit on that piece of shit. You got it. The one on the right, that's 25 to hit.

25 to hit, minimum damage? No, it's in damage. I'm also going to use my push to push him five feet to the left. Kind of crumpled in the middle there. You got it. And then I'm going to, you it. Then I'm going to... You're fine. I'm going to hop up

and get ready in my next turn to grab the... All right. Over the edge? Actually... Right there. Fucking skeletons are a pain in the ass. Yeah, they are. Yeah, yeah, that's fine.

Same on ghost ships. I don't even have to run. I end up just teleporting. I'm just going to teleport right next to it. All right. Fuck. All right. Fuck. All right. Us, one week earlier.

Ghost ship! Yay! This would be so cool! Ghost ship! Finishing your turn. All right. Climbing up the side of the boat. Oh! This is so fast!

That was so fast! Their turn was next, but getting up and climbing the side of the boat and getting to the edge gets them their movement, and then their action is going to rush forward towards you as a dash and just get there and be like, Captain, what's the plan? Then you're going to look back at the captain,

and the captain puts their hand up like this, still looking at Laudna. Was that a dash? Is it an action? Their action was their dash. It was movement and then dash, so they don't use it. But then they can't do it because they're incapacitated. Until your turn?

Yeah, until my turn. Until your next turn? Yeah, so get there then, you're right. Fuck off, dead guy. That's a monster spell. It's really good. Thank you for the reminder. All righty, finish in there, go Chetney, then Laudna.

I will make my way towards Laudna and the captain, and I will unsheathe Grass Char, the Luminary Blade. Okay. You pull it free, and it gleams here from the fog that surrounds it. It gives off its own faint, radiant glow

and in the back of your mind you hear, Old friend, here you draw me forth. Together, we will return to that insidious place in the mountain and destroy the first of many enemies of freedom. Not yet. First, we kill ghost pirates. I'll come up behind Laudna and just hold the...

So dash up to there? Yeah, and hold the blade out, and I'll say, I beg you to reconsider. If you want your compass, we ask, but a simple journey across the seas. Fuck me. Give him a little wink. Told you.

All right, so that finishes your turn. Yeah. Because he isn't listening, make a persuasion check on your point as well. Does it get an advantage? No, because, unfortunately, no, but the DC isn't super high. Okay.

Oh, oh, oh. I mean, I did cast Enhance Ability on it. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah! But you fell unconscious and lost your concentration. That's true. Natural 17. 17. Looks at you, looks at the blade you're holding.

You're holding it in a threatening way, and he's looking at it like someone who's enjoying their walk through an antique shop. He glances back over at you, finishing your turn. Laudanus, you're, yeah. Ah! So, you're asking for passage in trade. You all live.

You give me my compass and this fine weapon. What? I just go, sorry. What do you mean, sorry? Compass first. The sword upon arrival. I've made clear the deal specifications. I've made clear the deal specifications.

We end this now. Or you all die. You know a girl has to have collateral. Am I really supposed to trust a bunch of pirates? Make one final persuasion check. Come on! Come on! Come on! Land! Guidance, guidance, guidance! Now, because of your success, the DC is

right over here. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's our argument. I'll set it at 15 DC. Hey-oh-ay-oh-ay-oh! Oh! Oh-ay-oh-ay-oh! Oh my god!

Oh jeez. Hey-oh-ay-oh-oh! Oh-ay-oh-ay! 15 or higher. Oh my god. Oh jeez. 15 or higher. Come on. Girl? No, no. Oh my god. Oh, it was on the... Oh my god.

And you have a lot of modifiers. Who? Those modifiers. 10. 10. Collateral doesn't sound right to me. The blade, no. The compass after.

Or I tell them to set loose. I look at Chetney. Mm-hmm. Vr-vr-vr! I don't think he did really well. I'll flip the blade, so I catch the blade. All right, don't say anything about that yet. Yet! What are you doing? We...

We are bonded, you and I. Don't make this harder than it has to be. You'll see each other again. Time cannot separate us, death is but a door. The captain grasps the handle of the blade and holds it up. Oh, come on. Accept it! As he bows his head, he closes his hand. All the skeletons that have been running away

continue to run up onto the ship. The skeletons that are getting back up off the ground stop and snap up into their spaces and look back, no longer aggressive in their stance. The ones that are across the way that can reform and eventually begin to return, but they're all just casually walking now as the captain gives out a horrible,

ghostly, echoing whistle. And they all begin to slowly return to the ship. I swear to god. Yeah. And that's where we'll go to break. Oh! That's fun! So we'll come back here in a few minutes

and see how the rest of this conversation goes. That was awesome. Oh, hey there. Laura Bailey here to tell you all about the glorious goods we create inspired by our stories. Our stores are filled with the basics like character-inspired T-shirts, dice sets and pins, as well as more specialty items like fancy jackets,ired t-shirts, dice sets, and pins, as well as more specialty items like fancy jackets, puzzles featuring gorgeous artwork, the comfiest joggers and pajamas ever, and much, much more. There's also a few special items that support charity efforts, like our

dedicated Critical Role Foundation merch. You can check out all of our regional online stores by visiting the Shop tab on critrole.com or head straight to the U.S. store at shop.critroll.com. Every purchase helps support our shows and the stories we tell. Speaking of which, let's get back to the story. Welcome back. As you all look around, the mist still gathering at the base of the cold front that is the ghost ship itself. Crimson Abyss sitting here beachside

as the rest of the skeletal crew slowly gathers to clamber back on board. The captain still holds the hand out, gathering the crew. What are the rest of you doing? I'm gathering. I just waved to everybody from the boat. We're friends now, we're going to go for a little ride. See, everything's fine.

That's great. I'm sorry. No, I'm sorry. I was snippy with you and I was uncalled for. No, no, no, I was just. You saved my life twice. Well. Thank you. You're welcome.

You have this thing here in this realm called guilt, and I really felt it. Sorry. Did you not have that in the Fey Realm? Maybe, I just never really felt it before, but I feel it really strongly here for some reason. I'm sorry. Yeah, it sucks.

Because you'd make a decision to do something, and then you feel bad and hear. There are consequences. Consequences, consequences. Anyway, get on your wheel. Let's go. Okay. Could you swim? I don't know.

I have a propeller attachment. I'll use it as a motorboat. I thought you'd fold it. Plus those little wooden flat feet. It'd be like flippers. Sure. That's a good combo. It's valid.

I'm going to grab a pole and the boots. Steamboat. Yeah. You all manage to climb back on board as the crew begins to right itself, gather their materials, weapons recovered. The sniper that had been knocked to the ground and had its crossbow taken,

its crossbow was retrieved by one of the other crew members as they climb around board and hand it to her. And the way they hand it to her, you can see that this female smoldering skeleton holds some station within the crew. Now that you're up close and personal, you can see that there's the blue flame flickering in one socket.

The other is just dark and vacant. The sniper that is? The sniper, yeah. The human one with the bush of black hair that had the shrill scream that you were combating with the while begins to shout out commands to the rest of the crew. Gather up!

We're shoving off! Begins to put their finger in the air as the captain still looks at the blade and makeshift belt loops it around the side and now casts both saber, like the saber at one side and the massive sword at the other, which drags across the deck of the ship.

Looks over and addresses the rest of you, awaiting for you all to gather up towards the top of the deck, the poop deck, if you will, where it wants to address. So... Who are you and where are you going? Oh, well, you see, we're Bell's Hells. And we're sort of, you know,

we're like pirates ourselves, you know? Right. Yes, we're like pirates ourselves. You know? Right. Yes, we've stolen crawlers, and we've stolen airships. We were actually gifted an airship, but we, we, we. We crashed the shit out of it. We crashed it. Exactly into the face of one of our enemies. Yeah, right in the face.

Yes. You know. Congratulations. Mm-hmm. I'm Captain Novos. This is my vessel. This, and they address over to the second-in-command. This is First Mate Wolders. Wolders? Wolders.

Wolders. Wolders. Wilders? Wolders. Wolders. Wolders. Points to the smoldering skeleton. That's our navigator, Cerilia. And the first mate, Wolders, speaks. And this is the rest of our crew. Jamal, Odo, Peters, Bruda, Vandalo, the Witch Twins, Carmilla, Sanjay, and... Keith?

And the one that's got the mat goes, I've been with you for a hundred years! Kyle! Is that the little guy? Yeah. Oh, Kyle. What kind of vibe or attention are we getting from the crew, by the way?

A bunch of slightly impatient skeletons are curled around. They're not aggressive at the moment. They seem to be very much tethered to the energy of the captain, and you get the sense that the captain is the central point of power that tethers the entirety of this crew

and the ship's existence. So they seem to almost be in an idle holding pattern So they seem to almost be in an idle holding pattern until the captain gives some sort of directive or through the first mate, insinuates an interest. We're looking for passage across these waters beyond the Vermillion Reef to the island of Calutha. You're still?

Yeah. I don't trust these motherfuckers. They're real stabby. Calutha. That can be done. Well, a deal is made. Where's the rest of it? I thought you said we were going to deliver us first, and then you get your compass. Blade first. Oh, I thought he already gave you the blade. And then compass after. That's what you said. Oh. Oh, I thought he already gave you the blade. And then compass after. That's what you said.

Aye. Fire negotiations. After we get there? After we get there. No. Oh, after the blade. Aye. Oh, that's... That's a different one.

That's not fair. That's semantics. You also know that I'm bound by my word. Oh. Wait, how do I know that? He looks you up and down. Maybe you haven't done the true research then. Well, you're welcome to step off the boat. I take both.

True research. Honestly, we sort of, we didn't really do any research. We just heard about you from another woman and went like, that sounds great. And then. You're bound by your word? Mystically? Magically?

But when a deal is made. What would happen if you, hi, what would happen if you break it? I don't. I know, but I'm just saying, for instance, you say you're going to do something, and then you don't do it. Do you die more?

I don't. The, do you die more? I do. The eyes kind of. Do we? Well, how do we? I have pretty good insight. Am I okay? Make an insight check. Do we think he's telling the truth? He's telling the truth?

Insight 21. I get a whisper, someone else plugs something. Whiz, kids! You guys, check out the Mortal Kombat one-shot. Also chapter two, Candela. Candela! Yeah. You can do all these cheese whizzes, pretty good.

Matt's mouth right next to your ear is so nice. It's so warm. Like ASMR. You get that every night? Are you, is this unlocking something? Oh my god. You like whispers? Oh!

Shiver my timbers. New ASMR channel. Is this the beginning of our throuple? Wow, Sam's been rolling insight a lot this episode. Insight check, insight check! I don't need redheads. Whoa. My god, Samuel. I will take that as a compliment to Q.

So, either I get the rest of the deal we made, and we're all on our way, or we'll leave you here and take what's ours anyway. We can trust him. At least on this part. Okay, well, I just want to say, I feel like you duped me a little bit with trying to swap the order and just saying words when clearly my interpretation was,

I would give you a sword and then we'll get there, and then you get the compass, but... You just want him to note that you're upset? Yes! Okay. Consider it a hard lesson about parlaying on the sea. Feels more like a hard lesson just about you, but that's fair.

At least shake on it. The bony fingers curl around you, or bony fingers. Cold, clammy flesh meets somewhat damp, frozen bone. Bone on bone. Bone on bone. Holds there for a second. The Voresh are raised to reach. The rest of you hear squeaking,

almost like cold metal pushing against concrete. Chalk. No. My eyes flare a little as well, just immediately. Give me my compass. I pull on close to me. Yeah. I'm fine.

Jenny! I take out the compass. Wait, where's the wooden wand? Where's my replica? What thanks? It's pretty good, don't you think? You sure you don't want it? Give it validation. The dark, smoldering skeleton has walked up behind it and snatches the wooden wand from your hand and goes, Ah! Ah!

Looking at it with the one burning blue eye. It's made quite well cut. Thank you. The costmanship is second to none. Might I take it as a prize? Excuse me? Wait, that wasn't part of it. I didn't say it.

They're pirates, that's what they do. It's practically worthless. We still parked, by the way? At the moment, yeah, still parked. How did you lose your cold path? The captain folds his arms. We were, um...

We were known in these parts for being successful at our privateering business. The downside is you tend to make a few enemies. And when all your enemies become friends, sometimes it doesn't end well, but we decided maybe we weren't done. So here we are, and we've almost found them all. What happens when you find them all? I guess we'll find out. What else are you missing, treasure-wise?

The money's not too bad. You can see at your close-up, the bony grin of the captain. It looks like it's a pale gray bone, but on a closer glance, you can see the platinum-coated teeth on the inside of this black and old withered bone grin. That's cool.

It's got a platinum grill. That's sick. Yeah, basically. That's pretty. Into it. The money, not so much, but there are things that are personal to me. Items, keepsakes, trophies, and my navigation tools

are quite a collection. I agree. If you ever wanted to trade up in terms of craftsmanship, just, you could let me know. Grabs it, and as he pulls it away from you, you can feel this audible, like a sigh of joy across the entire crew and the captain, this

. Yep. This is so fresh, I'm so fresh awake. We literally could have done this 20 minutes before without beating the entire crew into the fucking water five times. That's fine. Took me three minutes to walk to the damn boat.

Welcome to the Crimson Abyss. Fine McQuar quarters are taken. You've got three days travel to your island. Three days. On a ghost ship? Holy shit. Is there a- So here in Tea, do we have the Elm?

Aren't going to attack us as soon as we make land. My word. Is there any, not for me, but is there any food and water on this ship for my friends here? Oh yeah, we have a ghost chef with a bunch of ghost rules and ghost mites. No, we don't have food.

We're fucking dead. We have stuff in the hole. We're all right, and whatever you're cooking. I can bake a little, yeah. We have some fish. Oh whatever you're cooking. I can bake a little, yes. We have some fish. Oh, we can go fishing. Do you guys have fishing rods and bait? Yeah.

Nets, perhaps, or something to control the... All right. I think we could probably find a way to catch some fish. Standing this close to him, can I use my hunter's bane to just get a closer look at, besides the eyes, any areas that are radiating any significance in his existence? Sure.

Go ahead and I'd say roll Investigation or Insight. Your choice. I'll do Investigation. You have advantage on this because of your hunter's bane. 19. 19. Within what bit of the coat you can see, there's that fierce burning blue light in each eye. There's the flare with points that he's making

as he speaks. You see within the shadow of the chest, glancing inside, there's a dull blue glow in the ribcage that almost pulses, not like a heartbeat because it's too slow, but it looks like there's metal in there, too. It looks like there is almost like chains that are wrapped around this weird source of light within the chest. Very cool.

And the ship itself appears to be an old, ancient wooden ship. Is there anything unnatural about it? So the ship itself, the wood looks weathered. It looks like this boat would not be seaworthy. You can see holes in the hull. There is an odd, pale moss and mold that's grown in places that seeps into every corner

of where the wood meets metal. The damage that you dealt to the deck of the ship looks like it's repaired itself slightly, but even the repairs bring it to a state of decent disrepair. The sails themselves seem to just blow with the wind and don't help, but the ship seems to have a will and a thrust of its own.

And as now you've made the deal, the ship begins to pull away from the island of Slavall. You can see the mist that billows out in front of it, obscuring the path before you. Yet the one that was introduced to you as the navigator, Cerillia, the sniper with the one burning eye, has clambered back up to one of the crow's nests and produces what looks to be a spyglass, but seems to look into the mist like it has no obscuration. And as the ship begins to push in outwards to the ocean and take you on the first leg of your journey,

the rest of the crew begins to go about their business back under deck. The captain stands, looking over the edge, taking the seven of you in for a bit. Not going to lie, maybe it'll be nice to have some new blood or really even any blood on the ship for a bit. Make friends, stay comfy.

Nop if you want to. Anywhere. If we're going to be here for a couple days, do you need any repairs on the ship? Should we spruce this place up, make it look homey or colorful? We like it how it is. What will you get out of this? look homey or colorful? We like it how it is. What will you get out of this?

Is that what you said? We like it how it is. Oh, how it is. Oh, okay. You all aren't from around here, are you? Is there anywhere? This is so thick. Is there anywhere? Yeah. Is there anywhere we're not supposed to go, or do we have free reign to walk

the levels of the boat, Captain? Of course. You can walk where you want on the level right below deck. My quarters are off limits. Where are your quarters? Okay! I am chan- Already?

Fearna, calm down, calm down. I'm just getting the lay of the boat, lay of the land. They're the only Double Doors on this ship. Say again? They're the only Double Doors on this ship. Three days of asking him what he said. Over and over again. He's like, we'll make it two.

Pick it up, pick it up, pick it up. Annunciation is largely about the tongue and lips, and they're gone. Yeah. Yep. So he's mostly just skeleton? Yeah, in fact, most of the crew is pretty much straight skeletal,

with little shreds of wispy dried skin in some places and hair that's tattered and dangling. When, when, when? Take yourself home to Rana. in some places and hair that's tattered and dangling. Why now? When? Take yourself home, Tarada. Find your ATI card. That one. When did you pass?

Like, for real? Yeah. Decades ago, who can keep count? It's been more fun since I've... So you truly do love this life of undeath? For now.

You know, variety is the spice of life. And one day, maybe we'll get bored of it. Maybe by the time we find everything that's ours. And now that you have your compass, where does it point to? That wasn't a part of our deal. Oh, what's wrong, you scared? No, I'm just private.

I can't believe no one's actually said this. Do you know what the fuck is going on out there, by the way, with other, everywhere right now? Have you noticed any of the crazy fucking shit that's going on? Has it affected your shit, what's going on right now? I have no idea what you're talking about. Holy shit!

Well, you mentioned that you're bound to the Strife Emperor. Right. Who is he? Yes, who is that? Is he a god? Summa cum laude, he's So McCall McCall is a guiding persona in the pantheon for those who like to get what they want, take what they want. Thematic.

Do we know who that is? Yes. Do any of us know Strife Empire? Make a deletion check, if you'd like. I'll do it. Yeah. How do I have a negative one to religion? I mean, you just discovered it. That's true.

Like, oh, yeah. Like, oh, yeah. What'd you get? 21. 15. 15? That's fair. Shovember is definitely one of the Betrayer Gods in the Pantheon. They are largely a god of tyranny, of conquest.

They would sit in the realm of lawful evil. They believe in structure through domination. Those that are in power are there because they deserve it or have earned it by showing their strength, and those who should be bent or made to kneel before them. That's the gist of it. You're uncertain what the detailed influence

in this realm is. You have very little personal experience or knowledge of the Shadow Teeth, but you get the sense in the way he talks about the Strife Emperor. It's less about reverie and worship, and more like, Hey.

If you're going to pray to something in dark moments, let it be someone I can agree with. Well, that might not be an issue for that long. All the gods are a bit under threat at the moment. I don't know if you've felt it. Been a bit busy. You bound to these waters around the islands?

Don't know. Yeah. That's what you're going to get out of all your objects, huh? Freedom? Maybe. What happens if your god disappears? I don't know. Well, that'll be an interesting day.

You know what we're good at is finding things. Got quite the nose on us, some of us do. So if you have any of these other missing items that, I don't know, are on land, we could be persuaded to perhaps sniff them out. Not getting your sword back. Don't cut me off the knees. He's right, we're really good at finding stuff.

So am I, obviously. Well. Well, we sort of helped. We just called you. We literally went, like, bloop! You're right, I found you when you did. It was really fast, we were right there. Response time was incredible, truly.

That was seriously hot to get here so fast. It's part of the deal. It's a solid deal. I don't fully understand it, but you know we're not going to question it, so. How many more pieces are left? Did you already cover this? They didn't say a number.

He's private. Oh, you're private. There's been enough questions for a bit. Nice to meet you, Bell's house. Make yourselves comfortable. If it gets a bit. Nice to meet you, Bells. How's making yourselves comfortable? If it gets a bit chilly, sorry. It's just how it is here. Anyway.

I'm going to go below Dig, take some time to contemplate. Yeah. He pulls the blade out and looks at it for a bit. I know, I know. Let's talk. Whoa! Whoa!

I think all of these were very good decisions. Are you okay giving up that blade? I mean, no! Sorry, Chetney. I feel like we struck up a rapport. Wait, what? I just feel like we have struck up a rapport as a group, and so it was my duty,

my duty to exchange something of great value for our shared goals. It seemed like you really liked that sword. Yes, it was a, yep. And you're not feeling anything strange in your body after giving it up? Like you're not hurt psychically or? I'm a little fucked up.

Oh, I can give you some healing. I'm a little weak, it's a little chilly. Okay. I don't know if you wanted to cook up something. I assume short resting at this point. I have a moment. Some of them are looking out, most of them are below deck,

and there's three, and the First Mate, and the Navigator. So really, the captain's gone. It's really still up there. Captain's gone below deck. It's just the First Mate and three other crew members. I'm sorry, with the captain gone, they're about their duties. Yeah. Okay.

Just a reminder, we also have the Reef Moss Balm. We have two of those. We have the slick shimmer oil and the vial of Cleansing Flame, which if you haven't looked at that, holy shit. That's the one where it gets rid of maladies or something. Kind of, but you got to fuck yourself up to get rid of it.

It's really cool. It's pretty dumb. And we have these weird motherfucking boots. Oh yeah, what do the boots do? I'll let them go on your feet. I'm not sure. I don't know that I can identify them. We'll do them tomorrow. No, I mean, I don't know that I can.

What do you mean? That doesn't make sense. You've always been able to do that. I know, but there's three attunement slots and I've got your staff attuned now. Why? Just unattuned to it. You don't need it right now. Okay, but what if we need to teleport somewhere

or something? In the next three days? What if all these pirates attack us? Well, shit's weird here in Shattered Teeth. I don't think we're going to be able to teleport. How long does it take to zero in? Like an hour or so? I guess I can just attune and attune. We got nothing else to do on this boat.

I'll switch attunement and I will identify that thing. Okay. Oh! Oh, we've been waiting! What does it tell? I've been waiting. They're just Boots of Speed. Far up in the sky. Just Boots of Speed.

Bonus action, click those boots. Liam knows this quite well. Boots of Speed. They're not boots of haste. No. Oh, boots of speed. You can use the bonus action, click your boots together. If you do the boots, double your walking speed. Oh. Any creature that makes an opportunity

to attack anything against you has disadvantage. If you click your heels together again, you end this effect when the boots property has been used for 10 minutes. That's it for the day. 10 minutes, you's it for the day. 10 minutes, you can double your speed? Damn.

Somebody that does not have a good distance. It requires attunement. I'm good. I mean, Ashton needs to get up close and personal in battle, right? I love, oh man. I don't know if you saw that last part. He was fucking hot-scoppied all over I know, you're able to jump around.

With that, he would be like. And sometimes I, oh. Oh, there are terrible things I could do with that. What about you? What about a speed wolf? Oh yeah. Yeah, that's the thing. That's kind of limited. I only got 35 feet.

That's fair. His legs are the shortest of all. Misty Step or anything? Nope. What about you? You can fly. Misty Step or anything? Nope. What about you? You can fly and stuff, can't you? Got our leap. I can do anything I want. I have a 35 walking speed.

I think there's somebody else. An orm, no? Not you? I lived that life. No, he's fast. He's fast-paced. I love my flea boots. I'm very partial to them. I don't, I just lost my third pie grass char.

Ashton. I mean, don't give up. Chetney. I mean. You have three days. You guys want to roll these for it? I'm resting. Want to roll these for it? Sure.

Oh shit, this is a high stakes rollies. This is a high stakes rollies. Best two out of three, or a single roll? Oh, two out of three. Two out of three. Two at the same time, or? Two out of three. One single, that's it.

Single, single. To prolong pleasure. 15. 17. Ooh! Second one, second one. One roll is down. You died, you died. What's the hammer mean? Oh. Okay. Oh, wow.

What a dick, I love it. All right. Wowza. I know when I'm beat What a dick, I love it. All right. I know when I'm beat. I know when I'm beat. I'll just sit over here with my walker. Well, hey. You're just bleeding everywhere because of the blood. I know.

Chetney, do you want the Staff of Dark Odyssey? Then you can control our teleporting and it also gives you Misty Step. Ooh! Don't you need arcane shit to use it? I don't know. It just says, oh, attunement by spellcaster. Are you a spellcaster? You can spell.

You can spell? I'm not a spellcaster. Not a spellcaster, yeah. I just have some touch stuff and minor illusion. Oh my god, this is dark. Vax, I am so sorry that I'm taking these. I'm going to make some roller blades. It's going to be awesome. Wooden roller blades?

This is mean. This is Vax main. Very true. Yeah, no. This poor little old man, you should help the poor little old man. Give me your hammer, Ashton. I don't know, what other shit?

Actually, I'll tell you, what other shit do you got? What are you unattuning to now? Nothing, I got a free slot. You got a free slot? Oh my god. He's got the rod, but that's not attunement. What if you each wear one boot? So we have to click them together.

And then you have to click, yeah. I'm good, I'm good. I got a butcher's bib, I got a scythe, and I got a ring of, you know, don't die. I'm good. A ring of don't die? Yeah, temporal salvation. Really? Yeah, it's from... My ex gave it to me.

Oh, I thought you were more of a gambling man. That surprises me. Now we're going to see what this thing does. I was going to say, depending on what you wanted to un-attune, we could have a conversation about this. I mean, I have a scythe, the butcher's bib, or the ring of temporal salvation. I'm going to look these things up.

We'll have a conversation. Okay, okay. As we have stated, we have three days, so maybe we can get your service. What did you say? You stroked it a little bit. No, she's speaking the same part. Maybe we can get your service. Put your lips back on, Laudna. Put your lips back on.

And it's just about time that we hung on. Footsteps, footsteps, footsteps, footsteps. What time is it? I'd say travel for a bit here. It's probably, so you stayed overnight. It's foggy. It's mid-afternoon, maybe. It's hard to tell, but you get the sense it's somewhere in the early afternoon, maybe, mid-afternoon.

Yeah, we stayed overnight. We talked to a person and a toad. It doesn't feel like the marine layer or the haze isn't caused by the ship or interacting with the ship. It's just moving through the haze. It's thicker around the ship. So there's no way to tell where we are.

You're just at the whim of the ship with no concept of what direction you're going or what's nearby. You'll probably have maybe a 50 to 100-foot viewing radius around the ship. Does it go all the way up? Is it above the, in the? Oh yeah. Yeah.

It's a tall mist. Peering over the side, remembering how fucking cold it was right by the ship, is the water interacting strangely, or can we see any aquatic life under the breaks in the water or as the ship moves? Yeah, as you glance over, you can see in the water, occasionally,

there's sea life that, as you look down, pours through, though the sea life that's there is avoiding the ship. The few things you see are curving away from it. It doesn't hold a lot of joy to those denizens of the ocean. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go.

Ooh, I love that noise. So. All right. Are you going to make a deal? You look like you're about to make a deal. What were you going to un-attune? Take your pick. I'm an open market.

Ring for the bib. You want the ring? Yeah, it's the only thing that vaguely interests me. That bib is so fucking ugly. It really is, it's terrible. It's just disgusting. I have nice clothes. Ashton, I'm so touched. All right, well, thanks to the ring,

I can pull them off of your dead body eventually. So, you know, it's just a loan. Don't tell my bae. Never. Just got to find you some wings now. That'd be fun. Yeah, where is it? Yeah, so Cerulea's still up in the crow's nest, right?

Yeah, but you can climb if you want to address them. I may climb. If you're going to go talk to the navigator, maybe get us a map or look at their map and see if you can remember. We don't have a map. Oh. They're ghosts. Yeah, I guess that makes sense.

Yeah, in general, they have nothing. They want nothing. They need nothing. I mean, they're ghosts. I can't believe this is actually a real ship. I'm a little concerned that we're not falling through the floor. It is, isn't it?

Maybe this is one of the items he got back. Ooh. Anyone want to look in the dark and scary inside? We're going to have to at some point. We should go see if there's any empty quarters. We're going to have to sleep somewhere, don't we? Right, got to figure that out. It's probably going to be colder below deck.

What do you think? That's the only way to find out. Let's go. Come with me. All right, what are you doing? I'm going to go up the, I was trying to remember the name of the ring really quickly. Ring of Temporal Salvation? Temporal, okay. Yeah, I'm going to go up the crow's nest.

You're going to get so much shit from Aabria. Yep. You climb up the mast, past the tattered sails to the upper level where Cerillia is currently perched and glancing over, seeming lost in thought, and then hearing you approach, they quickly spyglass out, looking off in the distance,

almost not paying you any mind. Hey. Or tap the eyes. How'd you get yours? Carved out. Lose a bet? No, I was making a point. Oh. Was the point made?

I don't need both to be the best navigator. Point fucking made. Mine was a window. I don't think there was really much of a point. It was a very interesting window. Looks like the window came with you. Kind of did. You know, these things happen.

You make do with what you're given. Yeah, I used to think that. Then one day, pretty recently, I realized that I hadn't been given really very much. I thought about that and and I don't know, I got real angry, and I just don't know how to stop feeling that. Anger's good.

It is. It makes things happen. You watch as the little veins of smoldering light in between the bones flare for a second, embers almost burn off. You get the sense now, at this close proximity, this is the skeleton of a fire genasi. Mm.

Yeah. This is all an anger trip, really. I... You ever feel robbed? Like you had a good thing and someone just took it from you. He looks down towards the ship for a second and then covers quickly. I pretend I didn't see that.

Oh, interesting. I had my first encounter with a god. Lucky you. Not really. Confirmed a lot of suspicions I had, which is, I don't know. I used to think... I don't know. I used to think they just don't notice.

There's just a layer of us that drop below the radar. Maybe that's true, but I got one to notice, and it didn't like me. So I'm considering not liking them right back. and it didn't like me. So, I'm considering not liking them right back. Good. Fuck them. Oh, I plan to, and we can. Things are changing out there.

Even the, whatever creature that cursed this boat may not be long for this world. Red moon. Something's going to get released. No one knows what's going to happen. You see, you mentioned the red moon and the navigator gets this odd turn of the skull, like it's putting pieces together.

Can anyone else see past this fog, or just you? Just me. So you're the only one who knows what the moon looks like right now. I haven't seen it a long time. It's up there. You should look. That's why I'm worried. Wait, you can't see it right now?

No, I haven't seen it in weeks. I haven't said anything. Things are changing, and no one knows which side of the coin is going to land at this point. So if I were you, and I only say this because I really have an affinity for people who have fucked up their eyes,

I'd think about what you have and what it's worth, and is it worth anything? And then, I don't know. From the feeling I get, you've been here a long time. I don't really know if you actually know what real anger is. You don't know me.

No. When I know being fucking angry, I start heading down. Okay. I learned a lot there. For those of you going below deck, indeed, the temperature drops dramatically as you go below deck.

Your breath is already visible, but below, you're immediately like, it's cold. You're going to want to bundle up, if you have the means of doing so, to sleep here with any sort of comfort. It feels like you're walking through a meat locker. But as you go below deck, the first thing that catches you is the sound of a violin.

It's so creepy, I love it. As you pass into this open area, you can see there are some bunks set out in a common area space. You can see one of the skeleton crew just has a little fiddle that they're in the process of playing with. It's just a gentle, looking at it.

It's a little off key. They're tuning it as they go. You see some of them are sitting around and having a conversation. There's a table in the corner where it looks like a few are playing some games of chance. You can see on one of the bunks, it's just a pile of bones.

One of them just took a nap and just went. That's what we call it. He rolled a hundred on the D1. Well, he went to sleep, so, you know. You think we're going to sleep down here, or? It's really fucking cold. Up top where it's warmer? Maybe.

Yeah, it might. I mean, it doesn't seem like this boat can regenerate. Maybe we can still make a little fire. Oh yeah. Yeah. I wonder if it's warmer in the hole by a few degrees. It might be. It's interesting. It's a bad idea.

The extra-dimensional space is. It's really true. Uh-huh, yep. Holes are warm. God fucking damn it. Cozy. Comforting. Dark.

Do the skeletons look like they're talking to each other at all? They're just being a normal crew? Yeah, they're just being a normal crew. So when they're having, I mean, once Yeah, they're just being a normal crew. Once you walk in, a few of them look over and watch as you enter. Some of them are quiet, some of them go back

to playing their dice games at the table. Seem like normal crew, they're just a bunch of skeletons. Weird. In a frozen space internally, they have lanterns that hang and sway, but even the light within them is a pale white light as opposed to a warm flame. Can I go over to one of them, just enjoy the music?

Say, oh, you guys look like a tight-knit crew. What does the captain like? What are his passions? The fiddling stops. Most everyone turns and looks to you in the silence. And one of them you saw was pointed out as Bruta. You can see it's a feminine skeleton in presentation with a jet black scarf

that's tied around the skull. And what looks to be two gold rings that are embedded in the bone around where the nose would be. Kind of leans forward. The captain is looking for his things. That's what he likes. Oh, that makes a lot of sense.

I just didn't know if he'd appreciate a thank you for the lift. But looking for his things. He likes manners, yeah. Manners? Good manners. Oh. Thank you for that information.

You're welcome. Where are you all from? Because you have a very thick, you all have the same kind of a They look at each other and another one leans forward. We're a bit smothered around from Wildemount and some of these islands. We sort of came together as a crew over time, but yeah. Some days it's hard to remember where we came from. What's the deal with the Witch Twins? What's their story? The Witch Twins. Witch Twins? The Witch Twins.

Wits. Oh, Wits. I thought it was witch. The Wits Twins. There are these two halfling skeletons that are currently in the process. There are two of the four at the gaming table that have... You look at the table and there's gold coins, there's piles of teeth, there's wooden, almost like shaved dowels with letters burned into them. There's a collection of buttons, whatever random things could be used as ante for different games over and over and over again that don't really serve any monetary purpose beyond just going through the motions of what they did in life. But the two it was twins are

these nearly identical halfling skeletons that both have one hand between the two of them of cards that are glancing over, looking at the cards and then looking back and trying to listen in at the conversation and such. Don't y'all ever get bored? over, looking at the cards and then looking back and trying to listen in at the conversation and such. Don't y'all ever get bored? There's a stagnant pause, and they all look at each other, and there's a resounding, unified, No, no, no, no, no.

Oh. I mean, you're playing with buttons and pebbles. Seems a little unfair to not have at least a little coin. The captain doesn't share. Now look at each other. They all start laughing at once. The first one that you were talking to,

Bruda echoes. Oh. The captain shares. Oh. The captain's very generous. What does he share? Whatever we take that's not part of his initial belongings.

Like buttons? This is almost like a frustrated resignation to the response. An immediate wave of disinterest comes over them. Look, we're not used to having guests. So, I apologize if we're a little awkward. No, no, no, this is good. This is very homely. We're always a little awkward.

We don't mean to sound judgmental. I think this is great. You guys have a little life down here. It's our first time on a ghost ship. Yeah. We've killed a lot of people. Oh boy, yeah. Hard to make friends.

Are there other ghost ships on the high seas or any natural enemies you might have? Yeah, or do sea beasts attack you ever? Because we will fuck them up. We will throw down! Sea beasts don't bother us, and we've not met another ghost ship, though I've heard tales that they're out there.

Maybe we could. Another one says something he's always pointed out, just Jamal earlier, and goes, I'd like to meet others. That'd be fun. Oh. It must be so lonely. Is that Kyle? No, that'd be fun. Oh. It must be so lonely. Is that Kyle? No, that's Shmall.

Oh god. Jamal or Shmall? Jamal. Jamal. Shmall. Is that necessary? Did you say Jamal or Shmall? Shmall. This is the Shmall skeleton. Snap out of it! All right.

Orym's inched his way over to the violinist. It's really good. This is the skeleton who's introduced to Sanjay. Sanjay. Who has human or elven features, or perhaps half elven, hard to tell. But just a bleached white skull that you can see has etchings around where the features might be. It looks beautiful, almost like a henna carving into the skull in places that decorate it. It has what looks to be a piece of straw that hangs out of the

mouth, bent in the middle and hangs, and it's tuning the violin. Do you play when you're alive? That's true. Do you take requests? I've never taken a request, ever. First time. What are you requesting?

Have you ever heard of Scanlan Shorthalt? Who hasn't heard of Scanlan Shorthalt? I would take beads of love. If you know it. I've never tried to play it on a violin, but I'll give it a shot. He's wearing a Scanlan reunion tortoise. I didn't even notice.

Oh, you're that guy. What, the best character in the history of Critical Role? He's got full bob, motherfucker. Concarver to do his slapping. It takes a minute for Sanja to get into it, but then it becomes this gentle, airy, fun rendition. It's like Beads of Love. You can hear the melody in it, but it's also,

it doesn't quite have the same energy from what you've experienced before, but it's not bad. Ghost violin-y version of Beads of Love. It lives up to the original. It's funny because it's naughty. Oh. Yeah. I'd love to hear the lyrics sometime. Is Kyle around?

Kyle is the one that was napping in a pile. Oh! Kyle the pile? He had a hard outing. Yeah. He was weary. He just went and took a nap. He had a hard outing. Yeah. He was weary. He just went and took a nap. He got Gallagher to kill him.

That was naturally occurring vicious mockery. It was just one shot. I've been with you for a hundred years. He's the only one who killed somebody, so poor guy. Oh, true. Maybe you earned the nap. Poor guy. I'm just going to float around and just see.

No, you're not going to steal, Kyle. No. You can steal whatever you want. Just one bone. Just one bone. Just one femur bone. Just steal one. I will slowly crawl my way downstairs. Just one. What are you doing first? I'm just going to walk around and see if I can find the double doors.

I'm not going to go in. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. I just want to see the lay of the ship. Okay, yeah. So as soon as you head down from the deck, the first stairs descend and they switch back or lead down a hall. The switchback is where you first went that led into this common area

with the cots and such. And then beneath that is the deeper storage hall, the cargo hall. But from the stairs that descend down, the hallway that goes straight leads to the double doors 10 feet later. So you remember walking past them as you all first descended into this open area.

So yeah, you know where they are. All right. That's it, I just want to know where. Is this where the violin music is going? Holy shit. It's a party. Who did this? The whole patterning.

He's got the one with the... Oh, the musician? Holy shit, that's cool. Thank you, that's Vandala. And points over at the game table, and there's one thicker skeleton that, based on the jaw and the brow, it looks to be orcish, half orcish.

Just holds a presence of strength and an honorable majesty for a skeleton in the room. And has a hand of cards in one hand that's just hanging off to the side and the other is in the process of counting quietly other people's hands in his own way, invested in the tactics of the current game at play.

Do they all have a blue glimmer of a sort in their sockets, or just some? They do. It's very faint in most of the crew, brighter in the immediate secondhand crew of Cerillia and Woters, and the captain is the most vibrant burning flame. Do you all have cannons on this ship? No, no cannons.

Even just the pistols that we have here were taken from recent ships. That's a fun recent discovery. Otherwise, we're just used to more of the classic ballista-style salts. You've stolen a lot of stuff. I imagine as you've been killing people. Yeah! Is there any stuff you're particularly proud of? Treasure? Loot?

Items? Yeah. I mean, who else are you going to brag to? Impress us. Make a persuasion check. Yeah, you're feeling the... Come on. Aw, fuck it. Goddamn it.

Persuasion? Mm-hmm. 12? 12. Remember, stay with me. The best thing about finding and keeping delightful things is not letting people know what you have.

Is that true? Because then they can't try and take it from you. I wouldn't know. Right. I don't steal. I don't. None of us take it, do that. Actually, Fearne's quite an adept pickpocket. Okay, well, we're just going to come out with you.

Well, I'm just saying, if they're proud of their thieving, maybe a little friendly competition. maybe a little friendly competition. Oh, with Thievon? I like a little game. Yeah, maybe in the next 24 hours, maybe if she can swap something off of you, you would show us some of your booty. They all look at each other a little strangely.

How would you even measure such a competition? I don't know. I'm pretty sure you'll know it when she shows you something that she's purloined from your person. Well, our methods of larceny are a bit more upfront and brutal. You don't think you have the skills to pick her pocket?

She's just a sweet little deer person. Maybe Odo. And Brutal looks behind, and you can see in the far, far back corner is this tall, thin skeleton who has a dark coat that's tattered just past the knees and a collar that's flipped up a bit.

It's just sitting there and it's in the process of picking out what looks like seaweed that's bunched into parts of the finger bones. This is one of the crew, one of the back crew that was chasing you down towards the end that fell into the hole. We forgive. Yodo? the hole. We forgive. Yodo?

Odo. Odo. O-D-O. Odo! O-D-O! Odo! Let's see, what was the orc skeleton's name? Vandala.

That would be a Vandala. Odo is a good pickpockety type person. He is our best pilferer on the crew. Sure, we could give it a go. We also, oh, well, you don't drink. I was going to say we know a really good game called What the Fuck is Up With That? We play it when we drink, and it's fun, but...

We don't drink. What do you... Do you play rollies? What's rollie? It's where you take your dice, and you roll them, and then you see who wins. It's like war.

Yeah. It's really complicated. It seems simple at first, but the more you play it, the more the complexity comes out. It takes a moment to learn and a lifetime to master. You see a handful of us, going to lean in, intrigued. Well, where, what's Rollie's from?

Just us. We're game creators. Stop it. Stop! No! We have a game company. We have a publishing wing. No, no, yes, yes.

No! That was the last anyone saw Bellas hover. You can see at the table, the ones that are playing cards, games of cards and dice are all starting to look over a bit. Tell us more about this roll, please. Do you need those two dice right there?

One of the twins glances over. I need you here. I'll just telepathically bring it over. They all. Telepathically, telekinetically. Telekinetically. Tele, tele, tele. Telemo. Telemarketing.

Tele. Here, take one of your dice. I'll show you how it works. Oh, the dice that they have on board here are d20s? Yeah. Okay. Polyhedral is an exandrian keepsake. I got a couple extra. I tossed some wooden ones out there.

Don't ask for those ones. Are they just Ashley's baby teeth dice? We both roll and whoever gets a higher one wins. That's the beginner level. And then whoever wins. Don't knock it. I think you need to play it to fully appreciate it. All right.

Rollies. Oh, I won. That was a 16. Now you have to tell me a secret. Double or nothing. Oh yeah, yeah. Sure. Getting it. You said two secrets? What'd you roll?

Two. Three! Woo! Isn't it exciting? It's fun. Triple or nothing. The skeleton's like, hold on, Bruna. No, no, no, I'm getting this roll.

I'm getting this rollies. Roll. You can do a variation of the game. Tell me a secret. A one. I won. I was allergic to cats when I was alive. I'm sorry about that. It must've been hard. Ask if he was allergic to ghost cats. We stopped talking.

Now roll. Use your mind powers to throw the game. Eight. Three. Oh. I win. Please. Good job. Tell me your secret. One time, when I was little,

I saw a bug that was crawling up a set of stairs, and it was... I'm taking the dead one over there. Roll. You now see across the table, other members are putting their cards down a bit and starting to look for other dice. Question, did 20 dead sailors just go... It took a minute for the eyelines to connect. Did 20 dead sailors just go? It was the lucky one.

It took a minute for the eye lines to connect. Does that mean Vandala is starting to... Vandala's looking a little frustrated. Vandala's looking frustrated that people are starting to pull away from the game that they were in the process of playing. I'm just going to walk by around the table to sit down and have a conversation. While I'm walking, I just want to lightly scan the process of playing. I'm just going to walk by around the table to sit down and have a conversation.

While I'm walking, I just want to lightly scan the twins' cards. Okay, make a perception check for me. No. No. No, five. You see nothing. Yeah, no. As soon as you start asking my name, both. Do we get an idea of what they were playing?

Do we recognize the game? You recognize, because there are two different games going on. One you didn't recognize, and one you did. Last you saw a game like this, at least, it was Fork of the Storm, which you played at Eos, in the casino there. Mm-hmm. Though a less fancy presentation.

Which one was that one? That was the one where you pick up a dice. Roll on. Are we going to be stuck doing this? Three days of rollies. What's a rollie? I have to lose two to spend time. Four.

Whoa, this is a double rollie! It's a double rollie. What happened? That ends the game for the day. That actually ends the game for the day. No! What happens when they're the same? Then you have to find a new partner.

That's the part of the roll. You! Oh my god. What happened? What have we done? Just created an addict. As the gambling chaos begins to take root, not even a few hours into your multi-day journey, the beginnings of- You know, you would have thought

after this many years, they would have come up with that game themselves. It's a great game! Bonding comes in strange ways, but we'll see where it goes from here as we'll pull back on the ghost ship as it pushes into the mists, heading towards what you hope is the destination you requested. And that's where we'll finish tonight's episode. Oh my god! Pick up there next time.

Oh my god! Pick up there next time. Oh my god. I love it here. It's okay. Again! What happened? What happened? The funny thing about being a ghost crew,

they don't socialize a lot, and they just get used to repetition. They only learn new things very often, and so you are a breath of fresh air to a bunch of undead murderers. I love them all. And you got days of travel ahead. So we'll see where that takes us.

Shatterteeth is the greatest. It really is. Let's just stay here. Campaign for Shatterteam only. Maybe. You have to go back and assemble the keep. No, not at all! thank you all so much for joining us. We'll see you next time. Love you very much. And is it Thursday yet? Yeah!

Yeah! Thank you for listening to Critical Role. If you've enjoyed the adventure, please consider rating and reviewing this podcast. Your insight can really help support the show by bringing new critters into the fold. Until next time, dear critters, adventure awaits!