Critical Role - Exandria Unlimited: Kymal | Part 2

Episode Date: April 8, 2022

Laying low only lasts so long in the casino town of Kymal... After regrouping, the Crown Keepers daringly attempt their heist at the Maiden's Wish. Meet the Players! Game Master Aabria Iyengar: https://twitter.com/quiddie Anjali Bhimani: https://twitter.com/sweeetanj Aimee Carrero: https://twitter.com/aimeecarrero Robbie Daymond: https://twitter.com/robbiedaymond Erica Lindbeck: https://twitter.com/ericalindbeck Matthew Mercer: https://twitter.com/matthewmercer Original Music by Omar Fadel and Hexany Audio Main theme by Colm R. McGuinness Additional Music by Universal Production Music, Epidemic Sounds, and 5 Alarm Character art by Hannah Friederichs Stained glass art by Joanna Johnen Opening Title by Christian Brown Due to the improv nature of RPG content on our channels, some themes and situations that occur in-game may be difficult for some to handle. If hearing discussions of certain episodes or scenes become uncomfortable, we strongly suggest taking a break or skipping that particular episode. Your health and well-being is important to us and Psycom has a great list of international mental health resources, in case it’s useful: http://bit.ly/PsycomResources Twitch subscribers gain instant access to VODs of our shows like Critical Role, Exandria Unlimited, and 4-Sided Dive. But don't worry: Twitch broadcasts will be uploaded to YouTube about 36 hours after airing live, with audio-only podcast versions of select shows on Spotify, iTunes, & Google Play following a week after the initial air date. Twitch subscribers also gain access to our official custom emote set and subscriber badges and the ability to post links in Twitch chat!

Oh, hello, and welcome to Exandria Unlimited on the Critical Role Podcast Network. This is your resident monster, Ashley Johnson. Exandria Unlimited airs Thursdays at 7 p.m. Pacific on Twitch and YouTube. If you'd like to watch the VOD, it's available immediately for Twitch channel subscribers and on YouTube on Mondays. Exandria Unlimited is, of course, also available in podcast form on Thursdays, a week after the original broadcast, right here on the Critical Role Podcast Network. Okay, okay, okay. Let's jump in to Exandria Unlimited. Hello! Welcome to Exandria Unlimited. I am your Game Master, Aabria Iyengar.

Adele Dazeem. Hurtful, but not inaccurate. Tonight, we conclude our two-part special. But before we get started, let's introduce our wonderful cast one last time. Starting with, it's a hat thing. We're doing a hat thing. So I'm going to start with Robbie. Let our powers combine.

My name's Robbie Damond, and I am back tonight playing one Mr. Dorian Storm, Air Genasi Bard, here to rock your world. I can't believe I just said that. Please, please someone go. Please. Oh my god, so much bravos. I'm so happy. People will leave anything you say

as long as you say it with confidence. I know! Did you feel it? I felt it. I felt it. I started to sweat. That was impressive. Hot in my pits. Hello, I'm Anjali Bhimani playing Fjerarai, the fire genasi monk. Took me a moment, I almost called her an air genasi

because you were that powerful. The fire genasi monk with fire for hair and fire in her heart. How cheesy can I be? That is cool. And all other places. Yep, go. Someone else. For the love of god.

This side has the cheesy stingers on. My question is, do I create the energy to create this? It's got to be a genasi thing. It's a genasi thing. It's the genasi thing. I feel like we're all so serious. Really? What? It's got to be a genasi thing. It's a genasi thing. It's the genasi thing. I feel like Critical Role is so serious. Really? What?

I was like, really? No. Amy, go! Hi, I'm Amy Carrero. I'm playing Opal, the Hexblade Warrior Warlock, and she's here to debase everything, I guess. Steal some boleros. And steal some boleros. That's right, get that fur.

Is that a way to earn experience points? Non, yeah. Respect that. Hi, I'm Matthew Mercer. I am Dariax Xavion, the dwarf sorcerer with a couple of neurons, and I'm excited to see where those two take them. They're all firing up.

Yep. Ooh! And they're boogers. Yep. Yes! Fiery boogers. Yes! Firey boogers! Oh no! There's just one left. Not two boogs to rub together, that voice.

My name is Erica Lindbeck and I am, I was supposed to say I'm voicing. I am playing the Lagomore rogue, Morrigan Farris, bunny humanoid. Yay! Yay! I'm like, I can't pop! Let's see if we can pull this poodle off, gamers.

Yeah, it's poodle night. Hey, is everyone just emotionally ready? Because I'm swinging to kill characters tonight. Oh, good. We're going to take a tight three seconds. Everyone come to peace with this. A deep breath, take a deep breath at home. Okay, that's it.

So why don't we go ahead and get into tonight's episode of Exandria Unlimited, Kaimul. Yes. Thank you. Damn it. All right, before we begin, a quick recap. Yes. So fleeing a 20,000 gold bounty on his brother Cyrus's head, Dorian fled across the sea from Marquet, through Emon, and met up with his friends,

the Remnant Crown Keepers, in the seedy little casino town of Kaimul. You all synced up, caught up a little bit, immediately got into trouble because you needed to steal a fur for reasons that are beyond me as a DM to understand. And ran into a new, uniquely gifted and very powerful friend, Morrigan.

Ooh, very nice. You opened the door for sure. I know. You sure did, very effectively, and you make an excellent friend. Tripper. I am incredibly powerful. The likes of which you have never seen. Legitimately. After overhearing a bit of the Crown Keeper's money woes,

you figured you might as well combine your efforts. Mor is here to clean out this casino after telling the group that she has made her way through every other casino in the city. I don't know that I'm ever, how many casinos are there? Actually, there are six. Oh, then yeah. That seems reasonable.

Yeah. That's a normal amount of casinos for it. That's a regular amount. Yeah. That's a good and sturdy amount. And you wiped seems reasonable. Yeah. It's a normal amount of casinos for a... That's a regular amount. Yeah. That's a good and sturdy amount. And you wiped them all. Yeah. Wiped them clean. Clean, a clean slate.

But this casino is different. It is the original casino in the city. It's the most well-guarded and by far the most prosperous. It's not like other casinos. It's different. It's a pick-me casino. I'm not a regular girl. Oh my god.

I am different in the maiden's wish. So you teamed up with this group and began your... I swear to god, I will pull this entire campaign over. I'm notorious, I apologize. I'm a fiddler, I got fiddle fingers. You began your poodle heist. Not a poodle heist. It's poodle. Can we just wrap it?

We just got to start over. No, you began your heist by stealing a key to a penthouse in hopes of finding master blueprints. You did so successfully? Yeah. It was great. No, it went pretty badly. You broke into the penthouse regardless, got into a big fight, and then blew up the room?

Parts of it. I mean, yeah. Not the whole thing. That tracks. We set parts on fire. We broke through the bottom of parts. It's just a variety of sections. Don't forget about the big, dark, sticky morass that your warlock made. And the charred bodies inside it.

Sweet. So Mor, they're effective. They're not subtle, but they can still be useful. You got the blueprints. You retrieved the treasures hidden under some tiles inside the penthouse. And you specifically discovered the most interesting secret of the Maiden's Wish,

that a piece of the architecture of this place, the sky deck, a glass-bottomed overhanging bar that looks out over the vast mud and rocky nothingness of Khimol shouldn't have been able to stand for the decades it's been around. And that's because it's magically reinforced with a very rare, very powerful magical stone

called Broomstone. So, you know that the streets are full of nameless ones stopping everyone from leaving via conversions and threats of death and pledges of fealty. But if you play this right, you can rob the vault, get up to the sky deck,

and make the craziest escape ever into the night. Yeah, because the Nameless Ones are on the streets, but no one said they were in the skies. No one's in the skies. How does anyone even be in skies, though? I don't know. We're going to do it, though. We're going to figure it out. We'd be in the skies.

We're going to be up in the sky. In the skies. In the skies. You're a chef. In disguise. That's what I said! I just got it! Oh, sorry. Incredible. And that is where we find ourselves.

But before we actually pick up gameplay, I want to talk about a new mechanic I want to introduce for today's poodle. Each of you has a coin. You can call it a Fragment of Foresight. You can call it a Heist coin. You can call it a Poodle Pip You can call it a poodle pip. Poodle pip. Poodle pip.

What it's called doesn't matter. What it does is the interesting thing. Now, we all know that planning is the most interesting and easy thing to do in Dungeons & Dragons. Every time. Every time. Captivating. So in lieu of having a four-hour session of you planning your heist

and then it not going at all like that, you're just doing your heist. You've already made your plans. And as you walk through and face down the obstacles, you can play your poodle pip and explain to us how you already accounted for this obstacle. This is, I've taken this from one of my favorite RPGs

called Blades in the Dark, which is a, like, it's a very cool, like, heist-based criminal system. And they allied a lot of the, like, having a plan with just starting in Meteorez, and you describe how you're prepared for this. So I want you all to feel prepared and effective because we're about to begin, but not quite yet. You've made your way out of the penthouse.

You're down, you're safe, and you're all together. So you have a little time, you need to rest, but you have rooms here and you have a plan. So how do you all spend your evening before the big heist? You need to rest, but you have rooms here and you have a plan. So how do you all spend your evening before the big heist? Do we have individual rooms? Are we all together?

That's not on me. Are you all little bunk friends? What'd you do? I just assume so. I would assume so as well. Okay. Little bunk friends? Yeah. Little bunk friends? Yeah. Little bunk friends? Remember the part where they're not friends, too.

I mean, I guess, yeah. Safety in numbers. For safety. Sure. For safety's sake. If anybody farts, it's over. It's been a rough six months in Byroden. I would want to be, I definitely want to be in the same room, if only because of my overdeveloped

sense of protectiveness. You're all in the same room. Mor, you have other rooms here. You are one of the favored bartenders, so they allow you to keep a room here instead of having to stay somewhere else in the city. I think Morgan would probably stay in the room, but just in the corner.

Just, yeah. She doesn't hang out with people very much. So she, you know, this is all very new for her. She's usually, every hit she's done has been by herself and very stealthy. So she's just flabbergasted at what happened. She realized what would have happened if, it's Fy'ra? Fy'ra?

Fy'ra had not been there, right? Yeah. When her plan to steal the key went so horribly awry, so horribly quickly. Yeah, and how she tried to do it on her own, immediately. Just, I can figure this out, and this is going to be a lot more complicated than she thought it was going to be.

So just interesting feelings about that. So Mor, as you're sitting and reflecting on that, watching this group interact with each other in this very boisterous way that's tonally different than everything you've experienced while you've been in Tal'Dorei. Can you give me a perception check, or investigation, whichever is stronger,

for the intel that you would have gathered on your way back to the room? Cool. 19! Oh, hell yeah. 23. Oh, hell yeah. 23. Oh, hell yes. I see numbers in the sky.

So as you were all making your way back to the room, you saw the pieces of the casino moving in that new and different way. The security was immediately heightened as people were going to reinforce and figure out what the explosion on the top floor was. And a thing you would notice as a rogue and very in tune with the way criminals move in spaces when they're trying to be discreet

is that you see now that you've run into little bits of the brass from some of the mob families that own these casinos, some high-level Thieves Guild members from the Myriad and the Clasp. They've been hanging in the shadows, but now you see them moving around the main casino spaces. They're huddling up.

People who were incredibly oppositional up to a day or so ago, are now in these deep, infertive talks publicly. They seem nervous and concerned. And with a 23, I think you can glean that the assumption here is that whatever happened upstairs was the Nameless Ones doing, and that they've finally breached the casino,

and this last bastion of safety in the city is gone. And now you see a bunch of wartime criminals getting ready for the big one. Interesting. While your eyes are intensely focused on the realizations that are continuously, wave after wave, hitting your conscious mind.

Dariax just comes over and plops next to you. Hey, you look like you're lost. How you doing? Oh, I'm good. I'm fine. Great, yeah. So we all did some crime. That was pretty crazy, right?

Those were the biggest crimes I've ever seen. Okay. Well, first off, what? You're a lot cooler than just a bartender. But you make drinks, I will say. I'm not taking the skill away from that away. I have had years of experience.

In drinks and also? Stealing things quietly. See? You know, yeah. I've only stolen, you know, gold and things from other casinos. That's kind of my whole thing. That's it.

Did a casino hurt your parents? Did a casino? No. Okay. I'm just curious. I don't want to pry if it's uncomfortable to talk about. No, no, no, it's fine. I just think that casinos are run by greedy people, or at least in Chimel they are. I'm sure there are some ethical casinos are run by greedy people. Or at least in Kymal they are. I'm sure there are some ethical casinos somewhere,

but definitely not in Kymal. Doubt it. I've never left, so I don't really know anything else. Never left? Wait, you've just been in Kymal your whole life? Pretty much since I can remember. I mean, I was born in the Feywild and then I just got shoved over, thrown over.

I can't really remember, but yeah. Ever since I was little, I've been here, so yeah. Do you have family back in the Feywild? Not really. I don't really remember all that much. Mm-hmm. It's okay. Sometimes it's nice to be alone, to be unencumbered. Mm-hmm. It's okay. Sometimes it's nice to be alone,

to be unencumbered. Mm-hmm. That's true. Yeah. You certainly need some people that can be very cumberish. Yes, yep, cumberish. What about you guys? Why are you here?

Well, I know you need money, right? Quite badly, yes. And we are here for him. Who's here for him? Hmm. Cyrus just tips his hat. So you guys are all your friends and you fight together?

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Pretty much. That's a good life. Yeah, no, that sounds fun. You get to travel. Something cool or, you know, like something you'd want. I mean, I don't know. I never really thought about it. I thought I'd just...

Insight check. Go ahead. Nine. Go ahead and give me deception or persuasion. You don't have to tell me which. Ugh. That's a dirty 20. Oh, yeah.

Say whatever you'd love to. Damn it! She's already like, it's over. I'll believe it, for sure. Sorry, I had to break the tension. Cyrus is laughing very hard in the first round. Gary likes to remember this. It is good to travel unencumbered, of course.

It is also good to have companions. I spent many years doing the same as you, and I found myself lost until I discovered these folks. Really? They gave me a little more of an understanding of my purpose. My door's not opening, or a rock. Fearer Eye, hold on.

And you see that Cyrus is patting his pockets and he reaches down and he grabs a crumpled up note and hands it to you. There was a orange dude that told me to give it, I think, to you. An orange dude? Yeah. Little guy.

Little guy? Yeah. I'm tall. Everyone's little. And what does it say? So this is a note that, at the top of it, says Jyn Wah. So he wanted you to know who it's. It's a stationary.

It's the letterhead. It's like you do your homework. It's his letterhead? Yeah. And does it have the date on it? Like in the corner? 100%. Dear Ms. Fire Lady. 100%. In very good cursive. And it just says,

Meet me in the spa in two hours. Then at the bottom, it also says, Genoa. Thorough. You're right. Do you have a date? She gets flustered and doesn't even know how to respond to that. It is from the child. Oh. Genoa Genoa wants to meet us.

J'noir J'noir. He wrote it twice. I assume that's his name. Yeah. I think he just didn't maybe want you to think that it wasn't him. So he used both of his names. Yeah. Yeah. We're smart. Either way,

he wants me to meet him in the spa, but hmm. How can you trust him? He's a nice kid, but a little thief, right? From what you told us. And infamous. Hey, listen, I'm a thief and you trust me. Yeah. Completely. I agree with doing the same shit.

Well, I don't know exactly if you trust me. I mean, do you trust me to have to be in a room with me? I trust you. Oh, thank you. I know about them, but I trust you. We're also pretty sure we can take you, too. Yeah, based on past performance. You probably can.

You are also not a child. A child can be whimsical. That's true. And affected more. I know a lot of the orphans around here. I mean, I am one. I was one. I guess I technically still am one,

but they're very street smart, and sometimes in a good way, not necessarily in a deceiving kind of way. He did seem sweet, if you can seem sweet when you are stealing someone's jewelry. When did it say to meet him in the spa? Just said meet him in the spa. Two hours. In two hours.

An orphan, you said? Cyrus did not tell you when he got that note. Oh god. Oh for fuck's sake. When did you get this note? He looks down and his watch is fully gone. He has a watch? How rich are you? Such as a sundial.

He has a sundial. It's weird, you have to walk outside. It's not a watch, man! It's a magical thing, a tinkerer gift. No, no, absolutely. Yeah. You are very rich indeed. I had a watch.

No, I didn't. I think one of those kids took it. He might have. I will ask. How long ago can you guess? Hour, two hours. Yesterday. What? You're very intense to look at,

so I'm going to answer by looking at you. I think it was maybe, oh, it's bad in both directions. Maybe? Yeah, maybe like an hour ago. An hour ago. All right. By the way, she has completely dropped any of the disguise that she was before, so hair is fully aflame,

so I can completely understand why he's a little scared. What are you doing? I was talking with my brother. Yeah. Sorry, go ahead. Let's go meet him. Well, he did say to meet him alone, I'm assuming. You should go meet him. No, he didn't say alone.

He did not say it, he just said meet me. It was just meet me in the spa. Right. We'll definitely want to meet him. Perhaps he has more information about the Nameless Ones. And after all, I know that the three of you may have made a name for yourselves in Emon, but I did not. Hmm.

So unless, well, and the ones that we recently met have been dispatched. So there is no one to report back that I have been with you. That's true. Can I have my cloak back? You absolutely can. Thank you. Well, I know where the spa is. I could take us there.

Yeah? Unless someone should stay here, stay guard. I don't know. It's a room. There are worse places to kill some time than a spa. Do you want me to? I can stay and watch the room. I think. I don't think he should be alone. I'm fine.

Look, I love a spa day, but if you want someone to watch your stuff. Oh no, I mean, I have everything I need on me. I just, I thought that was something that maybe you said. I don't know, I've never been with a group before. I thought maybe someone stays back. I don't know, it's usually just me. My one time going to things, it went so badly.

I got framed for a whole crime, there's a bounty on me. Well then, maybe you should come. Thank you. Yeah. Where's the blueprint? Who has it? It's Morhaz. No, you have it. It's, it's, it's, oh my gosh.

Please tell me you didn't. No, it's just in my- It's the only safe place. Yes! Her bunny pouch. Oh my gosh. Please tell me you didn't. No, it's just in my. It's the only safe place. Yes. Her bunny pouch. It's in my. Are you a marsupial?

No. It's in my side bag. Oh, that's what they call it. Oh. Side bag. It's in my side bag. I have it. Did you notice anything remarkable

or anything that would perhaps make this poodle a little bit easier? Well, as we were leaving the penthouse, I did see that the sky deck is held up by something called Broomstone. Do you know what that is? Like a broom? You know, I would think that, too,

if I had just heard it. Broomstone is a... Go ahead and give me a history check. Okay, I was going to say. History check, I'll give you advantage on this. I know Broomstone would definitely be something that she would know about. But I thought it was called a broomstone.

It's held up by fire and brimstone. Arcana, you said? History. Okay, that's an 18, or. Okay, that's an 18 or... No, that's an 18. Yeah, with an 18, you've heard of brumestone. You know it's blue. If you've ever, anyone that's ever seen an airship

in flight, you just got off of one. There were three giant glowing blue stones in an array on it that allow it, after a very simple enchantment, to hover and fly. It's incredibly rare and tightly controlled. It's on the blueprints. I whip the blueprints out from my side pouch. And I unravel the mesh. Totally dry.

Totally. They're not wet at all. The fact that you have to clarify, makes me feel bad inside of my body. Sorry about that. She said body. That's not your fault. On the blueprint, do we see where the vault is? Ooh. I'm not even going to make you roll for it.

Okay. So yeah, tracing back, you see that the vault is located underneath the West Run, that outdoor Colosseum arena. More specifically, because you see that there's three blueprints stacked on each other in different phases, that was a late addition to cover the installation of the vault.

Interesting. You can access, there are points of access to get down towards the vault if you go straight through 50 feet of earth under the arena. There's also some cages and pits down there that can get you a little closer. Yeah, but there's also an access point

to a corridor that gets to the vault. The easiest point in is actually a grate in the kitchens behind the Taste of Tal'Dorei buffet. How close is that to the spa? Other side, yeah. Okay. It's okay. There's lots of people around. You don't have to worry too much about it.

Just to finish that thought before we get to the vault, I think that the skydeck could be our way out. It's like an escape route. The skydeck is really rickety, and it's held up only by the brimstone. So if we could separate it from the building, we could actually essentially make a rudimentary kind of a spaceship, a skyship.

An airship, not a spaceship. A skyship is beautiful, too. Air, sky, tomato, too-ma-too. A space. A space. Well, you know, a spaceship. It's in space. It's in the space. We're not going to space. Air, sky, tomato, tumutu. Yes. A space. A space. Oh, you know, a space ship. It's in space. It's in the space. Yeah, there's space. We'll fill it in.

There's space. I feel this. How fast do you think we can go in this sky bar? I don't know. Skydeck, sky place. Do I know how fast a skydeck? Well, you know that it will float, but you are going to have to figure out a way to propel it in a direction. Also, are you saying that this is a detachable skydive?

Like it's removable? I think we might have to be the detaching factor. Yes, exactly. Correct? Yes. I also think we have some means of propulsion among the five of us, right? I mean, we have fire. We have wind.

You got your wind. You have wind. Did someone say, Oh! We've got earth. Mm-hmm. All right. Do you still have your wings?

No. No, that was... But he has his winged boots. I just don't know that they would be powerful enough to necessarily help us with this. I doubt it. Oh, wait, I have... But he has his winged boots. I just don't know that they would be powerful enough to necessarily help us with this. I doubt it. Wait, I have... All right. We have a lot to work out.

I have a new thing, but yeah. We'll talk about it. I'm getting a little ahead of myself, but I just wanted to mention it. It's smart. I think we should go see the boy and come back and try and plan this thing out. I think that's a great idea.

You have proven yourself not only trustworthy, but valuable. I do hope you consider not traveling alone for the rest of your life. Maybe I'll consider it. Just a thought. Thank you. Let's go to the spa.

Okay. I know where the spa is, right? Yes, 100%. There's only a couple places.. Okay. I know where the spa is, right? Yes, 100%. Go ahead. There's only a couple places. Follow me. I know where the spa is. As we leave, Cyrus is the last to come out, and I'm going to turn to him and I go, Ah.

Huh? Hmm? Stay. I'm going to go, boop, and I'm going to cast Invisibility on him to hide his dumb ass. I feel like I'm getting cock-blocked by my brother. And that's rude as shit.

Oh god. I think booping is the best way you can initiate a touch action spell. Like, boop. The boop action? Just blink out of it. Yep. You hear, but don't see, a little chomp as he tries to bite your finger after you do it.

That could be anywhere now. I'm fairly certain you'll just stay in this room. You don't know. And this is before our long rest. Yeah. Shut him in. Yeah. We definitely haven't gotten a long rest. Yeah, you haven't gotten your long rest yet.

A short rest. Have we had a short rest? I will say that you've had a short rest. Short rest time. Shorty rest. Yeah, if you guys want to refresh and roll some hit dice, but you are about to go to a spa, what's the worst that could happen?

Yeah, the spa. That'd be fun. Talk to the kid, have a nap. It's going to be easy. Yeah, it'll be great. Super easy. Okay, so it's 1d8 plus one. You have to spend one of your hit dice to go ahead and The only concern I do have.

The only concern I do have, yeah. Get your hit points up if you need to. Oh, I missed that. Using your hit dice if you want to, which would be a d8 as well, so you can just spend a few of those if you'd like. So d equals one? Yep, for each one of those.

How many do we get? You can roll up to six. Up to your level. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. All together? I mean, roll them one at a time, and when you hit your max, you can stop.

Okay, okay. What's next? Generally speaking, the idea is hit dice just take longer on long rests to come back. So they're good if you're playing in the long rest. This is episode two of two. Smoke them if you got them. We're going to try and rob tomorrow, right?

Yes. Okay. I mean, don't let me tell you what to do. If you want to do it now, that's amazing and a great idea. I'll pitch it. Pitch it. I'll use my pearl power to get a third-level spell slot back.

Hey! And the Bloodwell Vial does give me sorcery points back on a short rest. Let's go! Before we leave the room, the vase, the vase, whatever we are calling it. Is an urn. The urn. It's fun to say urn in this accent. Ooh. Urn, urn.

It's like two syllables. I'm sorry I got this thing. You see the urn floating in the air as Invisible Cyrus picks it up. Oh no, no, no. Kind of shakes it. You hear dusty noises. Cyrus, no, down, down. Put it down.

He puts it down. I feel that we should perhaps cover that with something. Anyone? Cover it? Sure. I put it somewhere hidden in the corner behind a bed, something like that. Okay.

Okay. But it isn't doing anything. It's still just swirly red stuff inside it and a bottle stopper. Well, it isn't even swirly. It's just full of ashes. Oh. Oh, it is an ash urn. It is a dead body.

There's a person in there. Oh. I thought it was a completely different thing. Okay, that's wonderful. Shall we? I'm going to change my outfit. Of course. And I'm going to do a terrycloth little robe.

Did they have terrycloth back then? Oh no. You know what? Similar to that. Yes. And with the Maiden's Wish insignia and the flip-flops that are too big. You know what I mean, when you go to the spa. No, I just have a small butt. No, I love this.

When you were in the penthouse, you saw the nice robes in Fadeeroff's bathroom. Ready to go. All for me. Is this called the Chroma Spa? It's called the Chroma Dawn Cave. Is this what you're supposed to wear to a spa? I don't think I've ever actually been to one before. Oh yeah, you're supposed to wear this. Really? Oh, spa cave. Chroma Spa? It's called the Chroma Dawn Cave. Is this what you're supposed to wear to a spa? I don't think I've ever actually been to one before. Oh yeah, you're supposed to wear this.

Really? Oh, spa cave. Chroma Spa Cave. I go ahead and disguise myself into a matching robe. So it's pink. They look like honeymooners. Oh yeah, no, I'm directly the same outfit. I don't know, I've never been to a spa before. Aw, Dariax.

Cutie pie. Is it on the premises or are we going through town? You were going down, yeah. You don't have to walk across the main casino floor. You just get down and scare us into the side. I've been to those casinos. Yeah. Wet footprint.

The one thing I am concerned with is this young man does not have an alliance specifically with one group or another, which means we don't know if there may be more than he waiting for us. Oh, you think this is a setup? I don't know if there may be more than he waiting for us. Oh, you think this is a setup? I don't know what it is. Give us the signal, we'll take him out.

Yeah, maybe you go first. Trust us, you're always so suspicious. Let's just go to the spa. Let's try it out. That'll be fine. Do I look like someone who gets her hair done often? That's a good point. But okay. It's cool.

Oh? Moira leads the way to this bar. She's leading you across, but it becomes very apparent where this place is as the architecture of the casino switches to this big, blasted, cave-like area until you're walking into the cheesy version of a dragon's lair. The grotto.

Yeah. It's nice and lucky and damp in there, baby. There's a desk in front of you in five colors, red, black, white, blue, and green. There's a lanky, young-looking half-giant who's like, Hello, and welcome to the Chromadon Cave, where each treatment is more devastatingly

relaxing than the last. My name is Tovar. If you need anything, can I walk you through our Chroma Crisis of Options? Let's begin! I would say that one more just goes, I've got it, I've got it, and just cuts him off and they walk in.

Wait, hold on. What room are you going to go in? There's five of them. One of them. Do I know what rooms there are? What room are you going to go in? There's five of them. One of them. Do I know what rooms there are? Have you been in the spa before? I would say I have.

Okay, then yeah, you do. Sure. What's the name of a room? Okay, I was going to I want to hear the rooms. I want to hear. I retcon, I retcon. I stop and go, what are the rooms? You go in decisively, and as you go, Tovar's hands shoot out to stop the rest of you, like, can I do my spiel?

Please. No one ever comes in here. Really? Yeah. Everyone's so stressed out, but none of them come in here. That's weird. Yeah. That's amazing. Thank you!

The first one is Brimsythe, the Iron Storm. It's a pressure point bed, and you lay on it, and you get pushed, and it's good if you have tension. There's a breath weapon facial that goes with it. It's a skin-firming mud mask. Do they actually breathe it on you? No, they have a little pump, and it sprays on your head.

Yeah. Next up, Raishan, the Deceased Deceiver. That's- Diseased? Yeah, that's what they called her. You have a ruin the spot called the Deceased Deceiver? It's named after the dragon. Normally Dorian would be mad into this, and as he hears that, he just raps.

No, it's really good. It's a detox. Just closes himself off. No, hold on. Tovar is so worried. You see him begin to sweat now, and he's like, no, no, no, it's great. No ringworm for Dorian. It's actually an ivy and locally-sourced

plant-based detoxifying wrap. All the plants are sourced from the Ivy Heart thicket just outside of town. It's good. Sounds lovely. Okay. Go on! I'm sorry. There's a facial.

It's a hydration mask. That sounds nice. That's so weird. Why are you stopping? It sounds nice. I don't know. I never get to do the whole thing. She just walked away. I'm sorry. I am not with people often. It's okay. It's okay. I'm sorry. No, I'm sorry.

No, no. I feel like I'm hogging the spotlight right now. No, no, no. I apologize. It's me. You deserve it. Yeah. Thank you. We are so invested right now. As this is all happening, I'm scanning and trying to see if I see my board.

There's five doors behind him, but you can't see into any of them. Gotcha, and do I see our little friend anywhere? You don't, because he's probably behind one of the doors. Okay. The next one, and he points at the white door behind him, is Voragol, the Frigid Doom. It's a cold dip pool.

Frigid Doom? Sounds awful. Yeah, Frigid Doom. He's a cold, he breathes cold. So this one's a cold pool. We have, there's a Dragonborn on staff that we keep, and he makes the hot pool hot and the cold pool cold. Like, does his whole job. So there's a cold pool, and then there's a cold mask. I feel like I'm just getting really nervous,

and I feel like no one wants to do any. You're doing great. We want to do all of it. We just want to figure out which one first. Oh, thank you. Question, does the Dragonborn sit in the pool with you? No, no. To heat? The pools are elevated and he's just under it. He goes back and forth and he casts magic

to make the temperatures. There's a little man under the pool that makes it warm. He's not little! He's like 6'6". He's little for me. That image is worse. It's worse for me. It's worse. So there's a big man. There's a big man.

Under the pool. He walks back and forth and he casts magic. Wow, what's that last room look like? I'm so excited. There's two more! Oh, shit. Umbrayl, the Hope Devourer! A black dragon! This is a cool full-body, not devourer, massage. It's administered by,

and then he goes and runs over and knocks on the door and you see this massive, old, scarred-looking, full orc comes out. Shit. And he's wearing this jerkin that looks very awkward. Awkwardly, it's supposed to represent Dragonscale and a little hat that looks like a little dragon hat. And he just waves. Hi.

Hi. And then he goes back behind the door because he doesn't want to stay here. Then the breath weapon facial is like an exfoliating acid mask. Oh, Thordak. Because that's the kind of dragon. The last one is Thordak the Cinder King. As you can imagine, it's a hot stone massage

in just a hot pool. Yeah. There's a breath, the facial is just a hot pool. Yeah. There's a breath. The facial is just a hot oil mask. I use it because I have really bad cystic acne. That's perfect for cystic acne. It's hot oil. It's fantastic. May I recommend the acid peel?

I would listen. You better do her. Oh yeah. I was just afraid of it because I feel like it would be too tingly on my skin. It's so sensitive. Sometimes tingling is nice. Yeah, I agree. How much is the treatment for each room, if one of us wanted to partake of the rooms?

If you bundle them together with the facial, it's five silver, but each one separate is three silver. Oh. Oh. Okay, well, why don't we do the whole shebang? Whole shebang? All our friends will each have one. I actually pull out a platinum, and I put it down.

Here, that should cover all of us for all five rooms, yeah? Oh my god, yeah. Do you want, I can have some water brought in, too. No, I think we're good. Okay. Just make sure the big man is heating the hall. He always does. He does such a good job!

Also, is it possible, we are traveling as a family, you see, of sorts, and we'd very much like to enjoy our time together, even if we are in separate rooms. We realize that we may perhaps have... Shh. How do I say I've overpaid without sounding like a bad person?

Oh, you're good to part with the platinum? Yes. You're going to be way too much money. I tell you what, just make sure that you split it with your coworkers. Exactly. The rest is a tip. We pull tips! Great. We also would just love not to be bothered. That's what I was trying to say.

We would love to have some privacy. Oh, that's great. There's only one other person here. Oh, oh! Amazing. What room? He's in the cold tip room. Amazing. Well, were you supposed to say that?

I'm going to do the hot one. Okay. Yes. I was going to say, do you need a robe? But you already have one. Do you guys need robes? No, I have fur. I'm fine. I'm comfortable. It's very comfortable.

I'm comfortable. The theming here is really strong and weird, because while it was before my time, my parents told me about the Conclave and they killed a lot of people. Yeah. It's just a unique dissonance. Yeah, you know, it's one of those things

where over time, history becomes inherently more irreverent. And hilarious. It's disrespectful, but you know. Yeah. Cinder King! Running into the rest. Yeah. I think I will head to this cold room, which sounds so delightful, she says,

as her hair flares a little bit. We're going to finally see her head! I've always wanted to see the top of your head. Incredible. Oh no, no. No, she just looks at you. No, she said it. We were living in that now. She just looks at you and moves on. I think I will go.

Let's not scare him. Why don't you go in and I'll just wander off into one of the rooms. Yeah. Just keep an eye out. Yeah. Yeah, sure. Someone keep an eye out. By the way, I gave Tovar the platinum because that was the one that Dariax,

Dariax gave me two platinum when I was at the bar, so I was like, oh, whatever. Very sweet. Yeah. Very, very sweet, but we do require privacy. Tovar? Yes. Yeah, okay, we're closed! As he yells out and no one's looking. No one's there.

So I shall head to the door. Okay, yeah, you go through the white door. It's like the Casa Bonita of all of you. Chimel here, I love it so much. Putt-putts, mom. I just love that there's a name with the word diseased in it. Disease.

Yep. Really just can't understand why it's not so brimming with customers. Come, sit in this hot tub. It's disease. Disease. Disease. Disease. Disease.

I didn't name it. You can't get pregnant in a hot tub. You could get chlamydia. Fantasy chlamydia. Fantasy chlamydia. Fantasy chlamydia. Wait, what? So tell me what this door looks like, what this situation.

Yeah, you see this very, once again, cheesy, glittery, fake rock-looking, icy white door, and pushing into it, it's more of that same cave decoration. There are arcane lights that are dark blue that lead you farther in. You feel the temperature begin to drop and you're led to a little 15-foot radius,

round room with just a cold tub, elevated. The general understanding is you guys are a little high up and whoever's controlling the temperature here is on a half floor beneath and is running back and forth. Trapped. Chained. Yes. Yes. It's not a board.

Running between two different tips sounds delightful. And as you walk in, you see, it would be smart if he was facing the door. His back is to you and he's just stretched out on the tub, shivering. Just enjoying his bath. Yeah. Thank you.

So you said we're led there, so I'm assuming there's someone. Oh, no, Tovar just opened the door for you and let you walk in. Before I even make any sound or anything, I'm going to use the gift to see if I sense anything shifty in the room. Let's make this, just give me an arcana check. Boo. Okay. Nope, I do not sense anything.

What's the number? I sense zero things. Five. Yeah, it's an excellent roll. These may be on timeout. Timeout. Timeout. A five. You can feel, you never lose your access to the gift. That's not the point.

It's just, there's not really anything being brought to your attention other than this very much a child shivering in a cold tub, not smart enough to watch you come in, shivering so hard he can't even hear you walk up, kid, and how truly, how scared of him could you be?

Dumb. Give me a stealth check to see if you sneak up on him. Mm, I believe I do. 17. Oh yeah, teeth chattering. You can absolutely sneak up. He's just like, in a new pose.

He's in there because he wants to be. I choose this. I love it. The cold is good for my teenage body. I was just saying, it's great for the circulation. I'm getting sore from all the stealing. Fucking hell. Yeah. Young one, it is better to alternate cold and heat,

so I hear. He turns and splashes, give me a dex save, as he leaps away from you across the tub. 11. 12d6 the tub. 11. 12d6 cold damage. Yeah!

You take no damage, but he absolutely catches you with a little wave. As I do it, I just place my hand up in a little flame. My little reach to the blades comes out, just as an instinct to keep myself warm. I figured this would be the fun one because we're both hot people and maybe it would be nice to feel a different temperature,

but I hate it in here. Yeah, it's not pleasant. And I, can I heat, like, can I hold that, I just hold my hand near him and warm him up a little bit as we talk. He gets close. He actually makes physical contact, like his tricep comes up to your arm.

He's like, I'm a tiefling. Resistant to heat. Oh. This is fine, thank you. Soling. Resistant to heat. Oh. This is fine, thank you. So I just put my hand on his shoulder. Thanks. Okay. Now. I could get out of the tub. Yes, get out of the tub, aren't you?

I'm going to have to be in it. More importantly, why did you tell me to meet you here? As she gets, I'm getting him a towel. Yeah, thank you. He gets out and lets you dry him off. He's like, thanks. She's being all getting him a towel. Yeah, thank you. He gets out and lets you dry him off. He's like, thanks. She's being all motherly and like. Yeah.

But in a really rough way. Yeah. He's just holding the towel. He doesn't tie it around himself. He's just holding it like a little kid coming out of the pool. I figured this would be a safe place to talk because there's not a lot of people in here at one time

and no one comes in this room because it's cold and bad to be in. And awful. So it was private. Excellent. Sorry, thanks for coming. I wasn't sure if you would know it was from me and you would trust me,

but you gave me money before and I felt bad. Then I was down here while everything, there was an explosion. Was there? Yeah. Are you okay? You weren't anywhere near it, right? No, we're fine.

Was anyone hurt? I don't know. Maybe? It sounded bad, and then lots of people from here and other places were running around and um sorry sorry okay so the explosion happened i got scared i ran outside um i tried to leave entirely and i got stopped at the edge of the city by um the nameless ones so the thing is, I don't want to bury the lead. I'm a Nameless One now, because I didn't want to die.

It's okay, because I was like, oh, I can find out information and be a double agent. So anyway, so I technically work for them and it's okay. You can't get out of the city and there's a bunch of bodies now. They're not letting people leave. A bunch of bodies? Yeah.

They're at all the roads and then there's ones in the woods, not by the roads. And I think they're not even asking those people, but everyone they ask at the exits, they're like, you give your name or you give your head. And then if you're like, no, and you try to fight and they fully kill you, they kill you all the way. And then just leave your body so everyone else sees it.

And it's like a blockade. And there's a lot of dead thieves everywhere. So I joined them, is the thing. And I gave them the money that you gave me because I was scared, but that's okay. Anyway, I tried really hard when I was like, I'll join up. That's super cool. I'm a valuable spy.

Let me meet my new leader and I can bow and do it. They didn't let me meet the leader, but I did see some of the important people. Excellent. I saw three guys and they kept using the word Lieutenant. La-te. La-te. Lieutenant?

That's it. So one was an old dwarf. Can you say, he's an old dwarf lady? Can you say old? I don't know. She's old. Is it accurate? Yeah, her beard is so gray. And her name was Mulberry.

Mulberry. Yeah. And then there was a tall, half giant, giant, a really big guy. He had a bunch of piercings in his face. I didn't get his name, but he was really scary looking. And the reason I came back to find you was because there was one other person there that looked a lot like you. I don't know if you're secretly a nameless one

and we're on the same team, or if someone took your face and is impersonating you. You mean another genasi? No, I've seen genasi before. This one looks exactly like you, but with different clothes. I immediately put my hand on his shoulder and I flick up to the gift.

Is it who I think it is, is what I'm asking. Okay. Arcana check. It's cocked. Cocked. For cocked. For cocked. Oh. What was it?

What's that? Arcana. Arcana, a 21. Your gift. Would you like me to be a little more specific? No, no, no. Okay. I am trying to decide how to give this, because you put your hand on him and your gift shudders before you even think the question,

because you've thought this question a lot. The focus of your attention for the last year has been in your sister's direction, so the gift knows what's coming. Almost as if you were seeing it through his eyes, you're looking at your sister, Fearicai. And it goes away just as quickly as it happened.

I immediately step two steps back and just stare at him. I'm sorry, I know I'm so strong and buff now from the bath that That is intimidating. Was she... How did she look? Was she under duress? Was she... Tell me.

No, she was in charge and yelling at people. She yelled at me, which was fine because you yelled at me the first time, too, so I was like, I think I like this. That's okay. So she was one of the... I'm taking charge of stuff. She's a lieutenant. Say it again.

Lieutenant, leftenant. Lieutenant. However, it depends on- Leftenant? It depends on where you're from. It's very strange. It's a leftenant. A French lieutenant's room. Exactly. Let's go with lieutenant.

Okay. I am as flabbergasted as I am. Do you want to sit in the cold pool? Is that going to help? Do you want some water? I can get you some water that's not from there. I'm going to get you some water. I'm immediately melting a little bit.

I'm going to get you some water. No, man. I have one question to ask you. Okay. Do you want to remain a Nameless One? Oh no, I don't really care. I've been here my whole life, and I figured at some point,

I get picked up by a squad. Right. These guys came in, and the Myriad and the clasp and some of the families, they've been fighting each other for longer, for years. Then the Nameless Ones came in and in two days took a whole city.

So I don't know, if you have to throw in your lot with people, why not the ones that win? Yes, that would be the wiser thing to do when you meet such people, wouldn't it? And I immediately think of these guys. We win! Shall I? Are you a nameless one?

Are we on the same team now? I am on your team, shall I say. Okay. I am on the team of Xinhua. Hmm? That's nice. I hand him his whatever garments he is not wearing because he's been in the pool, and I hand them to him. Do I have to?

Get dressed, I will leave. Or I will turn around. You don't have to. Not in a weird way, it's just fine. I'm turning around and then. He just puts on his pants over white shorts. Wet tieflingness. Yeah. I have far too many questions

that I don't even know where to begin with. Cut to someone else. Okay. We smash cut from the cold room. Where is Opal? Did you go into the hot tub room? Oh yeah. I think they're splashing hot water at each other.

This is fun. That was nice. That's it, that's our scene. That's it. They're hot! Equally short, you see Dorian walk out of the acid facial room, and he's not a bath towel,

he just has a hand towel around his waist. His face is burned, so it's purple because it's red on blue. He's just walking to the next room. He's like, I paid for it. I'm going to try all the services. Then he walks off into the next room. Torn is a Taurus for sure.

Yo! I felt attacked and seen in that moment, yes. Moir, where did you go? Is there a hallway that connects all these rooms, or is it literally just each? It's a five-splinter hallway from that main room where Tovar was. Hmm.

Which rooms are unoccupied now? You're making your way from room to room, but you just came out of the black room, so green and blue are unattended. Okay, I'll go into the blue room. Sweet. Okay. And I still have the blueprints with me, yeah? Yeah, if you want them.

Yeah, I have them in my side pouch. I bring them out. They're not wet. They're not sticky. I actually just frantically have a moment of anxiety and I rip them out again and I just look over them and over them and over them, trying to memorize, burn it into my brain where the vault is, and I'm just like, okay, okay, okay, I have to, yeah.

Nice. You actually see that there's a middle-aged, very used-to-be-pretty, just a middle-aged, very... used to be pretty, but is probably like a century out from that, an elven woman that's just waiting on the side. You don't have to. You don't have to get on the bed. It's fine, just take your time.

Sorry, I'm not trying to. You're cool. Can I not have noticed her? Yeah. When I ran in and whipped out the blueprint? Yeah, for sure. Oh! I. Yeah, it's fine. Yeah, you did. You're good.

Do you want, I can go. What are you? I can go. No! It's fine. No, no, no, no, no. I get on the bed. Sweet. You see this 10 by 10 foot bed of iron spikes. Yeah, if you could just lay on it.

Is that going to hurt? Yeah. Yeah. All right. Sports massage. Exactly. It's waltzing. 100%. Yeah, sure. And you actually see that she goes to the edge of it, and instead of making physical contact with you,

she puts out a hand and you see this shimmery blue mage hand comes over and just runs over different parts and is massaging your shoulder by pushing your back down into, it's like an acupressure without any physical contact and she's like, do you want me to talk or not talk?

I don't really know what to, I'm kind of new, so. Oh, they let you do this on spikes and you're new? Yeah, I know how to not kill people. I just, yeah, but not everyone is, they're like, talk or don't talk. You can talk, well, what's your name? Who, oh, Elena. Elena, that's a pretty name.

Does any of this hurt at all? You know what? Give me a... An ouchie check. Give me a constitution save, just to see how much... You take six burning damage. How much mushing you can take. How much mushing? I have a soft little bunny.

You have a soft little bunny. Of course I can take mushing. Oh boy. Ah, an eight. A strong eight. Tinder. You're the Tinder boy. E, I can work it out! E!

Yeah, she starts pushing and she starts pushing a little hard, but you notice that she watches the way your body tenses and immediately lets up. Yeah. She's got her tongue out. She's very focused. Sorry, sorry. No, no, no, you're fine. You's very focused. Like, sorry, sorry.

No, no, no, you're fine. You're doing a very good job. Thank you. Yeah. Is this working? Do you? Yeah. If you don't like this, you don't have to do it. No, I like it. It's taking my mind off of things. It's really nice.

Okay. Yeah. All right, deep breath in, and exhale as she cracks your back. Ah! Okay. and exhale as she cracks your back. Ugh! Ugh! Okay. Well, do you want the face mask, too? Is it made of acid? No, this one's mud.

The oil. It's like skin for me. Why not? Is it okay on my furs? Oh, fur. Hold on, let me check. And she stops interacting with you. The maitain is floating, paused over your face,

and she goes and consults a very thick tome. It's like, I just told you, I'm gluten intolerant. It's like, can I? She's thumbing through and looking it up. Hold on. Yes, it's fine. Great, slap it fine. Great. Slap it on. Okay.

She comes back and then starts gently brushing. But she's kind of trying to mush it to get your skin under the fur. Oh, man. The mage hand was more discreet. Like slapping it around my face? Yeah. Just sort of mushing a paintbrush into your fur.

It's not great. That's amazing. I think for Morgan, Fy'ra, she feels like Fy'ra is very competent, so she thinks she can take a moment and kind of, you know. The minute she realizes there's someone fully in the room watching her look at these blueprints, yeah, it can take a second.

That's fine. She didn't notice it, never brought it up, and unless you're actively speaking with her, she tends to default into silence and focus because she's still new at this and figuring it out. But yeah, is there anything else you want to do that can just continue and your treatment will be done in 10 minutes?

Totally, yeah. Just trying to listen out, just see if anything's going on, but it seems pretty quiet right now, yeah. I mean, you can hear very, very gently giggles and splashes. Oh my god, yeah. Yeah.

Just the two, no brain cells. Yep, yep. Cooking them off now. Making the dead ones laugh. Amazing. Just boiling them up. Can I ask J'wasin some question? Oh, another question? One other question?

Sure. As he's getting dressed, I ask him, do you remember any of the orders that you were hearing from the three left-handers, particularly from the one who looks like me? Oh. She was in charge of the people trying to leave. She was in charge of the people trying to leave.

She said that anyone else coming wouldn't... She said anyone else that was still in the city wouldn't be converted, that they would be too important, so they could stop asking. Anyone still in the city? Don't quite understand that. Anyone still in the city would be too important

so they could stop asking? Yeah, you know, the question. The convert or not. I think she thinks that they got all the ones that were low-level enough. Because I'm a big deal, and I think I was the last good get. Yeah.

You are. You have great honor. Honor among thieves is a big thing, you know. Thanks. The other ones, I didn't really hear what they were saying too much, but it seemed like they were gathering and getting ready to do something big.

But you don't, nothing else? Sorry, they didn't really tell me to do much. Of course, and you did not see this blue one with the strange skin you've seen. The what? The one you saw before. You did not see... Okay. Can you continue to be our eyes and ears?

Yeah, since we're on the same team. Team Genoa. Team Genoa all the way. I'll do my best, but I'm going to let you know, two gold was really nice, but I don't have it anymore. If it comes between selling you out and sparing my own life, I hope it doesn't come to that,

but I'll do what I can because I like you and not a lot of people are nice to me. But you know, it's tough times. Tough times. I can solve one part of that and I give him another two gold. But if it comes to your life, save yourself.

You are too valuable. Thanks. I hope you don't die as he slides the coins into pockets that are now wet because he did not dry off his little shorts. Delicious child, welcome. Yeah. Okay, I'm going to go because my pants are wet.

Can I just give him a little more heat before he goes and dry him a little bit? Maybe don't put your hands near me there. I'm going to go. I need me there. I'm going to go. I need private time. I'm going to go. But thank you for trying to drive me off. He goes, bye, bye, bye! I'm going to go.

I'm going to go, thanks. Like, one minute after he goes, I'm going to come out and find, I mean, I can hear them, right? From the massage room, you hear, Ah! Ah! I immediately run in that direction.

Ah! And I fling the door open. And it's just me and the orc. It's an orc. It's an orc. It's got their knee in the base of my back and my arms over my head. And it's going, Ah! Ah!

Is that good or is that bird? I'm not sure! I would say Morgon probably hears this, too. Yeah. And runs into the room. 100%. Also. Yeah, I think we all hear it. Hearing Dorian scream all of a sudden, Dariax is like,

No! Dripping wet, dripping wet, dripping wet Dariax. We're all in your room now. For what it's worth, Rakamaru, the orc has big headphones. Of course he does. They're like earmuffs on, because he's used to this, and he's just humming, sort of,

tunelessly to himself while he is absolutely wrecking your form. I immediately run to the front of his vision with my hair flaring, and I say, Stop. Let him go. vision with my hair flaring. I say, stop. Hmm? Let him go. Peace.

Oh, he lets your arms go. He leaves his knee where it was, though. I'm sorry, you good? Oh, gosh. It's great. Thank you very much for your service, but I'm going to roll off the bed, leaving my little towel behind.

Oh no! And just my two little blue cheeks are going to walk right back to the changing room where I left my clothes. You penguin waddle? Yep, I'm out of here. I'm out of here. Past all of us. Yeah. Cheeks out.

Someone next? Some people can't take deep tissue. Sure. Sure. Do we have time for this? I don't think so. I'm afraid we have to cut our visit short. Oh, bless you. Thank you for your, whatever that service was.

I need to go back to the room. Okay, okay. You all right? Brain check. Mugger. Would you come with me? Yes. Sure, yeah. I'll connect with the group after the cloth.

Just going to find Blue Cheeks McGee before we head back, though. What if they weren't blue? What if they were just pale blue, like a tan line? Yes! Like a sky blue. That's really good. Like a full-on whale tail thong line.

Yep, right over the hip bone. Then we're going to get so many smutty fucking cash eggs. Please draw it. So many not safe for work. You have to draw it. Please draw it. And candy. bloody fucking cash dragon! I'm like, so many not safe for work. You have to draw it. Please draw it. And tan it. Please draw it with a tan line, too.

Oh my goodness. Horrible. So I'm hustling. Where do you reconvene the group? I'm hustling us back to the room where I know we can speak privately. Yeah. Our young friend was indeed in that room.

I don't know how to say this, but my sister is here. Your sister? You have a sister? She's got a twin sister. Oh, that's fun. We all have siblings. Yeah. And, uh. It's like a theme. Is that the criteria to join the group?

All talk, they can. I still, I think because... I still can't quite believe it, so I just say, and the Nameless Ones have her under their thrall somehow. I don't.

Like a charm or something? Perhaps. I don't know what it is. All I know is that she was with two other lieutenants, someone named Mulberry, and a very large half-giant. It can't be. You've never seen her. She's like, her eyes are practically crossed.

Other lieutenants? What do you mean, other lieutenants? The young one, who knows if he really saw what he saw. But he said she was a lieutenant, too. Oh. So she's the boss. But he said she was a lieutenant, too. Oh. So she's boss. Of the Nameless Ones. I mean, listen, don't jump to conclusions. You know, she could have been forced in or something.

I wouldn't assume the worst. No. I just thought. You see all that sisterly guilt that you guys remember, like all the old stuff that you haven't seen in a while on Fy'ra is just starting to consume her, every part of her being. She just looks the tiniest bit smaller. Opal puts her hands on her shoulder,

trying to be supportive. There could be a positive out of this. If your sister became the leader over here, maybe that means that she took out Poska, which takes care of one of our problems. And maybe we just talk to her and we get this thing all sorted out. Maybe she'll be happy to see you.

Maybe she's the big misunderstanding. Yeah. Yes. How goes the, is everyone relaxed? Mm, I feel fine. You just hear mild snoring from the corner of the room. Are you okay?

Oh, just, I'll be fine. I think we should perhaps get some rest before the morning. No? Yeah. And she just staggers over to a bed and sits and says nothing. All right. Anything else? Would you like to take in?

Yeah. Eventually, you all quiet down and move to separate areas. There's a couple of rooms in here, but mostly you're grabbing extra blankets and finding little corners to fall asleep. About half an hour after you guys get back to the room, Cyrus reappears as Invisibility, wears off,

and he was just sleeping in the corner with his elbow on the urn, guarding it. As best he can. He comes out of Invisibility, does not wake up. He's asleep, he's posted up, and he's great. And the rest of you fall into fitful sleep.

Opal. When you wind down for the night, your dreams turn inward and you find yourself once again in that dark liminal space. That's much less scary now that you know Ted is waiting for you. Yeah.

And it's not necessarily her that's waiting for you when you get there. You feel, not across your form, but all of this is interior to you, so you're aware that skittering across the inside of your mind are countless, countless spiders. You look down at your hands and you are how you truly appear.

Icarus-stained, bleeding, goopy, terrifying and beautiful all at once. You hear the Spider Queen's voice in your ear. You had a busy day, didn't you? Yeah, it was kind of fun. Where's Ted? Oh, she's here. I just wanted some alone time with you.

Okay. So, how do you like my gift? I have some notes. Mm. I don't take notes. Oh. Then why'd you ask? Because I was hoping you'd be excited

to continue and further our little partnership. I am. Oh, I love it. I love it so much. Just a couple little things here and there, but I'll just put it in the feedback box. It's fine. But I love it. You're doing great. Okay.

Well, I think you're doing pretty good, too. Thanks. But I will say, I see through your eyes, and I know where we are. In a casino. In a city that is much friendlier to the Unsworded types that have given over to worship and devotion to me than there are ever in Emon

or by Rodan or those well-traveled, well-heeled, sad little towns that you've been trotting me around through. It's a little rude. The Children of Malice reside here. They love me. Okay. I feel like we need a little bit of a PR shift for you. Because I feel like you're a really good person,

and people- I'm not a person. Okay. You're a really good being, and you just got a bad rap the last few hundred years. I don't know. But I just feel like maybe we could rehab your image a little bit, you know? I mean, I'm listening. Well, instead of being so horrifying,

maybe we can just clean you up a bit. We can do some nice things for people and then that'll rehab the image. And then people won't run away when they hear about you or see you or stuff like that. What nice fucking thing do you think I can do to get people to stop calling me a Betrayer God? Oh, so much, so much.

Well, we can start by helping poor people. You know, we can do this poodle, and we can help poor Dorian and his brother Cyrus. Dorian. They're so poor. Here's the thing, girl. They're in trouble.

And, like, I really think if we hook this up for him, then word will spread that, like, Lumberrayer God is now helping good-hearted folks. So you're going to tell people that I helped you rob a casino? Not me, but helped. Maybe that's not a good plan. What about? Look, this is a blue sky. I know it's pitch black, but blue sky mating.

There's no bad ideas. I'm just like, aren't you tired of people calling you a betrayer? I mean, the betrayer is suboptimal, but I like being worshiped. You could be worshiped for good things, or neutral things. This is going differently than I expected. Welcome to my mind!

Make a persuasion check with advantage. Okay. Oh shit, fuck. That wasn't in the thing. I'm not going to hold you to it. Okay, okay, okay. Okay, with advantage. So, okay, one more time.

Okay, okay, plus whatever. Plus. Hold on, hold on. 17. That's not hold on. 17. That's not the worst. 17's not bad. And everything goes quiet. So 16 plus four.

Oh, plus four? Persuasion. Oh, persuasion! Sorry, I was like perception. That's a 20. Did I say perception? Maybe I said it wrong, that's not me. No, no, you said persuasion. I just can't read.

I'm already ready to gaslight myself. Not on Women's not me. No, no. You said persuasion. You said persuasion, I just can't read. I'm already ready to gaslight myself. Not on Women's History Month. No, ma'am. No. Ma'am. We got you, girl. It's April now. It's not our month anymore. Oh, it's not. April Fool's, I love myself.

Yeah. A dirty 20 is a stronger case, and you feel that skittering stop. Then the voice seems somehow closer to whatever is the source of your hearing. She purrs in your ear. Okay. Well then, will you be my champion?

Yes! Oh my god, I've been dying for you to ask yes! Every champion requires a test, but I know how strong you are. Okay. Is it a written test? I'm bad at those. No. And I apologize, because this is going to hurt. Make a constitution saving throw.

Oh no, what did I just agree to? 19. Oh my god. Wait, right? Plus? No, I have no plus. Okay. That's great. Plus zero. It's a 19!

Yeah, it's still good. That's great. Okay. Opal, you feel yourself, your conception of yourself, double over in pain. Your veins and arteries feel like they are filled with fire as poison rushes through your body. You see in your mind's eye, you're looking down at yourself

and you see shuddering flashes of what could be, of people that have failed the Spider Queen's test and been warped and twisted and turned into horrible monsters who have no will of their own. They're simply bent into her service. But you know who you are. And that presence of mind that lets you stand

and speak to a god as an equal, as a partner, courses back through you, strengthens your resolve, hardens your veins to iron, and you feel that pain lessen and lessen until it's a warm comfort that runs through your veins, something else close to you, inside of you, in a part of you, as your circlet awakens. Ooh.

So you are now resistant to poison damage and immune to the poison condition. Okay! All right. And that special ability you have on your reaction to add a plus five to an attack roll, you can use it twice before your rest. Holy shit! Plus five twice!

Okay, and she feels this? She feels it. Okay. Yeah, Opal feels it. Okay. Then you see a dark mirror, but a mirror nonetheless, shimmer and come into being in front of you, and you see yourself, this dripping, terrible mess. She says, Well done, my champion.

Thanks. It feels pretty good. Maybe we can negotiate a little bit of an outfit clean, but we don't have to do that right now. We can do that later. Why do you think I made the mirror? Really? See, I knew you were a good friend.

Are we friends? Yeah. I mean, you live in my head, so I hope so. Interesting. And you feel her presence recede. And now in this mirror, you can decide what you look like. The circlet has to stay on. It's a part of you now, but you can change your appearance if you want.

I think Opal looks in the mirror, and she doesn't love it, and she did have notes about her appearance from before. I don't take notes. But I really think now that she's hardened and there has been a little bit of this badass power coursing through her, I think she realizes how powerful that imagery can be.

So I think she's going to keep it. Amazing. Some personal growth. And anyone watching you sleep would watch you go from fitful tossing as you relax, comfortable in the power that you claimed and claimed you, a partnership. You move on.

Thank you. Dorian, I think at some point during the night, Cyrus fell asleep a little too early, so he has that 3 AM problem of when you take a nap a little too soon, he wakes up and he's going to scooch over. Where did you fall asleep? Hmm.

Probably floor. I would take the floor. Yeah, I got my cloak wrapped over me, maybe a watered-up throw pillow or something. We've been roughing it a little bit over the... Quite a while, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's going to scooch up to you and,

not roughly, but just try to nudge you awake. Are you up? I am now. What's the matter? Is everything all right? I just wanted to have a quick check-in, because I think things got really crazy. Things are always crazy around you. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Around me? Like, in a good way. Oh. Like, it's crazy, but you take care of it. Yeah, yeah. And you're always with people that take care of it, and you take care of them. I'm going to give him a nod and slowly creep over and put my back against the wall by the fire,

away from the rest of the group. Yeah. I know I'm the older brother, and I'm the one that's supposed to lead our people, but I just wanted your advice on what I should do next. I mean, assuming we don't die tomorrow and my debts are settled,

I don't feel ready to go home. If I have to be honest, neither do I. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure if we were needed, someone would call for us. 100%. We don't necessarily keep the best low profile. No, we do not. Mor was right.

We are not subtle. You know, I cannot think of a time where we have ever spoken freely like this. I should apologize for that. I don't think it's your fault. Or mine, necessarily. I think it was the way we were raised.

I think they kept us at a distance on purpose. Yeah. It makes sense. I'm going to apologize, because I think when I noticed it, instead of pulling you closer, I let them hold me away from you. You are so good at your position.

Listen, I know my friends have been teasing you. Yeah, I'm observant. I have been too, but you are a good heir. You're strong, you're capable. You're strong. You're capable. You're loyal. We may not be the best outside of our element,

but there is no one better than you when you're in it. But this is what I've always wanted. I've always wanted to bring the outside world into our lives more, into the lives of our people. That's all I ever wanted. That's why I left. And we are just showing through our ineptitude that it was the right choice.

God, every story I heard about what it would be like out here, it's so much bigger. Well, it's so much more difficult. Every story I heard about what it would be like out here, it's so much bigger. Well, it's so much more difficult. Oh my god. I thought we would rule. Wouldn't you spend every day of your life and your youth someone telling you, you're the best or your brother's the best?

Everyone's so nice. Yes. But they don't have to be nice to you out here. They don't. And they can take advantage of you, or they can lift you up. And we've had both. And I am loving every minute of it. Even more so with you.

So whatever you, whatever we choose, I think we're on the right path. As strange as it feels. And if this doesn't work, we meet other good people that we like and we bring those that we can with us. And that's all life is. When it's time to go home, we go home.

And I hope we go home together. Oh, please, Alf. I'm sorry. It's all right. Full of emotion. Together. Oh, please, stop. I'm sorry. It's all right. Full of emotion. And I went to the bar like three times while you guys were fighting, upstairs. It's been a tough few months.

Yeah. I wouldn't be here without you. I am grateful and proud to call you my brother. I will follow you anywhere. Side by side, and we'll take turns on who takes the lead. Okay. All right. And he leans in and gives you a hug.

Oh god. Come on. I'mans in and gives you a hug. I'm sorry. Oh, you s- Wait, you s- Once I start, it's just so hard to stop, and he's just wiping his face off on your hair. Oh, you smell like mead, too. Yeah.

I tried the bread. They make it different when it's not more making it. It was thick. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. All right. Like thin bread. Yeah. Makes a real thin bread. Almost fluffy.

Come on. And we'll go foot to foot on the floor by the fire. Side by side. Not spooning, my brother! What's a big spoon? Foot to foot. Side by side. Who's spooned to spoon? Foot to foot. Side to side. What's a big spoon? Foot to foot.

He pulls out a deck of cards. He says, do you want to see some card tricks I've picked up in Khimel? What? Card tricks? Yeah, and he actually starts shuffling, and I can't do it. I was practicing for this and couldn't do it. But does a bunch of cool little jumpy card shuffles,

like very dexterous things. He's like, I just picked it up. He's good at something. Wow! Yeah, that's pretty good. Anyway. You want to play a couple? Sorry, big emotions. I'm not going to fall back asleep right now.

I need a cool down period. Yeah, yeah, what about Three Dragon Ante? Oh, all right. And he starts dealing you cards. Let's do it. Perfect. And yeah, in that nice, quiet room, dark gives way to early light, and you all come back up to consciousness

just as the sun reaches over the craggy peaks of the Iron Seat Ridge in the distance. It's a new day. It's a big day. It's a heist day. It's a poodle day. It's a full poodle day. So I think it's time to get into it.

So before we begin our poodle proper, why don't we go ahead and take a little break? Yeah! All right. I'm excited. We're going to walk this off. We'll see you back soon in a minute. I hate this part.

Go away, then come back soon. Goodbye! Yeah! Go away, then come back soon. Goodbye. Bye. Greetings, adventurer. This is Liam O'Brien. If you'd like to support the show, consider checking out our sweet, sweet Exandria Unlimited merch in the Critical Role shops. Links to all of our regional online stores can be found at critrole.com. And we're back. So, after getting a nice long night's rest, having some important conversations both externally and internally, and a very interesting trip to the Chroma Spa Cave.

Thank you for letting me do that. It was so disrespectful. and a very interesting trip to the Chroma Spa Cave. Thank you for letting me do that. It was so disrespectful. Tovar for the win. Tovar. Tovar for the win. Love him. Tovar would be heard. Tovar would be heard. Yes.

You guys wake up refreshed, rested, and prepared to do a whole ass heist? How are we feeling? Woo! Right, we're doing that. I think Opal's going through all her outfits. Just ding, ding, ding. What'd you land on? Now that you've started it, I will, like,

what'd you land on? Okay, well, just stop me, just stop me, and then I'll tell you what it is. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Fair. She looks like Mor. Because she just always wanted to look like a little bunny. Little bunny? And then she's like,

just kidding, I just want to try it on. And then she changes back into her, I think she just ends up in this outfit. Just deep. Yeah, yeah, no skin. Because we did the art, so she's going to wear this. But she did try selfier options, but she's going to land on this one.

Love it. Yeah. Love it. Okay. Is there anything any of you want to do before you begin on your adventure? Just any preparation. I will say, who's probably going to be taking point on this?

Who's looking to be the tip of the spear, if you will? Seems obvious. Hmm. Gotcha, I cast Eight on you at third level. Oh, excellent. Whoa! What's that? He just cast, he gave you Eight. What does it feel like as you cast it?

In the middle of this moment of trying to figure something out, Dariax places his hand on your shoulder and there's this odd surge of almost like you just chugged a warm bowl of soup that's a little too hot and it's burning in the belly a little bit and you're like, oh no, this is a bad idea, but then it's nice.

It freaks you out for a second. That's very much a good encapsulation of how Dariax's magic works for other people. Do I have magic boogers now? That I can flick at people? We'll find out. But for now, that'll at least keep you a little hardy and up and about in case things get a little weird.

Oh, thank you. So for the next eight hours, you have an additional 10 hit points to your maximum. Whoa! Whoa! No longer sharing with three hip points. I know, no longer a three-hip point share. Ew.

That's not even 10 pinpoints. That's like action. Those are real. Okay, whoa. Wow, wow, wow. That means you can heal them back if you lose them. You know what? We're done with that. No! No! It's just fine!

Yeah, me too. Never! No! Okay, okay. I started this cosplaying as Robbie and I will finish it cosplaying as Robbie. You will fucking finish it. 90% more brim. I didn't know how to get a big enough hat.

I would say that Mor is very touched and she looks at Dariax and she says, Sometimes it's nice to have friends. Yeah, totally. Sometimes it's extremely obnoxious, but I will say as a person that's done a lot of traveling on my own, you tend to get in a lot more trouble

when you don't have physical consciousness. That's the word, conscience? Conscience? Conscience. Conscience. Consciousness. Consciousness is around you, and they keep you on the straight and narrow. Plus, it's going to have drinking buddies, and I don't know, sometimes cuddle buddies. Anyway. Yeah.

Let's do this shit. Let's go. Yeah. Okay. Quickly. Yes? Can I, Spider Girl, bestie. Okay, I don't know how I feel about Spider Girl. Okay, what should I call you? What's good? What should I call you? Hey, what? What should I call you?

The Spider Queen. Oh, okay, that's a little formal, but okay. So we're about to do this big poodle, okay? So if I just need help or whatever, can I just call in? I need help. Because I'm your champion now. Yeah. Actually, yes.

And I can grant you a boon since you forgot to do it yesterday. Okay. And you feel that little opalescent brooch returns to your form as your familiar is resummoned to you. Oh yeah, it's an earring, but yeah. Oh, it's an earring, that's right. Okay. She made it a brooch and then she goes, your familiar is resummoned to you. It's an earring, but yeah. Oh, it's an earring, that's right.

She made it a brooch and then she goes, oh, I'm so sorry. And makes it an earring. My bad, I forgot. Would you be upset if I called her Ted III? Or do you want me to call her, I can name her after you, Spider-Girl. Wait, why?

Oh, it's the same, there's so much to unpack in everything you just said. Oh, so it's the same soul. It's the same, there's so much to unpack in everything you just said. Oh, so it's the same soul. It's the same, not, soul is a big word. It's Ted 2 again. It's Ted 2 again. All right, we'll call her Ted 2 again. Thanks so much.

You're welcome. Love you. Bye. Sometimes she just gets like that and stares in the corner. It's a little creepy, but you know, keeps her happy. You actually see as she's looking off, you see what you can only imagine is the shadow of a spider spread across her eye.

Rough. You don't feel anything, though. Billy Eilish could never. That is sad. I have been holding a tiger's eye stone in my hand and just working it through my fingers for most of the morning, as we're planning. And I hold it tight and try one more time

through the gift to just get any sense of where Fy'ra Kai might be. I'm not going to have you roll, because the only time you had a guy, it might be. I'm not going to have you roll, because the only time you got a flash was that singular bit of confirmation that she was alive. But beyond that, there is magic on her that keeps her from your detection. And even though you are fairly certain she's in the city,

the gift can't reach her here. Okay. Right, it's the big day. There's one big question. So you know where the vault is. Yeah. You've got two big ways to reach it. Do you try to directly access it by going to the Western

and trying to go subterranean to that and make your way down into the vault? Or do you use the corridor that's accessed in the kitchens behind the buffet? Well, since we have people after us, right? It also seems like, as a burden, that you would have more access to the kitchen. I probably have a pretty good idea

of the layout of the kitchen. I mean, obviously, I have the blueprints, but. I think, more based off of the events of yesterday, I would say probably the less direct route in her brain. And then she also says it out loud. I think I explain that there are two different ways. We can either take a direct route or an indirect route. Basically, we can go subterranean, go underground,

or we can go through the kitchens. I vote the kitchens, just because, you know, we made a little bit of a splash yesterday. Yeah. Valid, yeah. Also, I know the kitchens, just because, you know, we made a little bit of a splash yesterday. Yeah. Valid, yeah. Also, I know the kitchens. Great. You made a splash. I made a goop.

I suppose there is no danger of the Nameless Ones trying to come to us, and it does seem like they have been held responsible for the events of yesterday in the penthouse? I can't say what the Nameless Ones will or will not do. I wish I could. Do you think it wise for us to disguise ourselves as much as possible, then?

I feel. Yeah, I mean, if you feel that would help. I don't. I do a mean green highlight. Mm. I'll take my brother's cloak and I'll wrap it around my head and just put a hood up. Poor Cyrus.

I imagine he's got his literal hand stuck in a cookie jar or something. Yeah, he's in the corner. It's stuck in the urn. Yeah, it's in the urn. I'm like a great king! Yeah, yeah. We know what's in there. If I just let go of the dirt,

I know I can get my hand out, but I want to hold it. Oh my god. That's what he's doing. Yeah, yeah. The dirt! That's not dirt. Just let go of your hand. That's a man who let a pet rock die. So we're not trying to blend in, right,

is what you're saying? We are trying to blend in. We are trying to blend in. Yeah, yeah. I'm confirming. No, we are. So should we look like we work here if we're going through the kitchens? Is that the deal? I mean, sure. That would make sense.

Sure, yeah, yeah. All right, all right. I go ahead and use the cloak to give myself the same feather outfit that Mor had on at the bar earlier. Inspiration. I will use Hutt. I will cast Disguise Self and put on my little feather outfit, too.

Oh, you guys are twinsies. Oh my god! Baby twins! Love it. I guess I'll disguise Self as the woman whose bolero I stole, with the bolero and everything. What was her name? Amazing. I don't remember. Bolero lady.

You got a name. Bolero. Well, no, she wouldn't be in the kitchen. Yeah, do you want to look like a patron here or someone that works here? Because you have seen people that work here. They tend to wear baby blue and lilac. Or big feather things. I'll, just because she's who she is,

I'll be the lady, but with the feathers, as if she works here. They don't make any sense, but you know. They're showgirls. Yes. Anyone else? Feather, featherather? Feather? I have my cloak,

which can hide my hair as best as it can, but everything else on me is... I'm pretty undeniably me. Hmm. Which, you have that just a little bit of an errant thought, intrusive, that it's not bad to look like you right now. That's true.

You make a good way. Huh. I just realized something. Who said that? Never mind. Opal takes out some perfume and goes, Here. Flammable.

Yeah, my hair just like, my hair just like, My hair just like, now you'll smell different. Oh, excellent. It now smells like burnt perfume. Yeah, burnt perfume. It's extremely flammable. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Exactly. You know those essential oil things where you heat it up and the essential oil dissipates? That's what just happened with your perfume. Incredible. It didn't really go the way I thought it would. We don't all have to be together. Two employees, a few patrons.

We'll work it out when we get there. Okay. And I may? Yeah, we're good. We're good. Shall we head to our planned place of entrance? I don't know. Don't you remember? We came up with a plan already.

We've already come up with a plan. That's why I said. And we smash cut. Yeah! Look, I'm just trying to make sure you all hear it. We've already come up with a plan. That's what I said. And we smash cut. Yes! Look, I'm just trying to make sure you all hear it. Seamless transition. And you all are standing in front of the entrance to the buffet.

A taste of Tal'Dorei. Is this going to be a pun list? Yes, it is. Yes, it is. Great show here for it. I'm going to say that my outfit, I gave myself big feathery fans so that I can cover things up when I need to,

like maybe people slipping behind doors. Ooh! You know what? I'll allow it, I love it. So yeah, you walk in, and the extra bit of intel that we didn't see as we smash cut here, you all are aware that there's no gambling happening on the main casino floor right now. Tables are turned over, people are huddled up, and they are bracing for an assault.

Yeah, that's why I figured we could maybe go through the kitchen, because things are so topsy-turvy right now that it might not be that weird for us. Exactly. There are people in the buffet eating, but it doesn't have that jovial, everyone living a mimosa life on a Saturday morning. People are clumped up, huddled up, grabbing what food they can, and they seem to be mentally and physically girding themselves for an assault. But you walk in, and again, it's that dissonance

of a very jokey atmosphere with a very dour reality. Just break you off a couple of these. You see over in the corner is the dessert bar. It's called Pie Rodin. Yay! Yep. These are all for you. I'm just going to make eye contact with you, Matt.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's the Still Bend Fish Market, the Iron Authority Grill. Yeah, because, yeah. There's the Still Bend Fish Market. The Iron Authority Grill. Yeah, because it's just grilled all kinds of animal. The Amon Cloudtop Breakfast Bar. Mm-hmm. Oh. Yeah. And the Kraghammer Blast Furnace Pizza Hutch.

Oh, not the Pizza Hutch. I dig it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Pizza Hutch. And the Whitestone Winery, where all the mimosas and drinks are. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, I want to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's a hutch. And the Whitestone Winery, where all the mimosas and drinks are. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, I want to go there.

Written in cursive under it is, Life Needs Wine to Live. Hey-o! But first, wine! Oh. More. Yeah. That's my town.

The pies. We're known for our pies. Oh, really? Yeah, you got to try some one day. That's cool, yeah. If. We're known for our pies. Oh, really? Yeah, you gotta try some one day. That's cool, yeah. She grew up in this buffet. That's very funny of you, Dariax. What?

That was a funny joke. Thanks. Vzzz, vzzz, vzzz, vzzz, vzzz. Those two brain cells just pinging. Vzzz, vzz banging. Zzzz! You see the entrance to the kitchens is right between the winery and the breakfast station. Cool. You've been in there

a couple times, probably. Yeah. You head back and no one, people clocked you as you came in, but no one's making any sort of move towards you. You don't actually see very many people that work here other than people that are running the different food stations, but there's not the same security detail.

Okay. I just keep a smile on my face as I walk ahead of everyone, like doing that showgirl strut. Yeah, I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm doing something. Amazing. You push into the double doors,

into a boisterous kitchen. You see just a bunch of stressed, like, all sorts of races here, and everyone's just at full capacity. There's shouts and yelling and a cacophony that's unmatched by the relatively dour silence of the rest of the buffet. And a very tall, burly-looking,

sunburnt human turns to you and is like, Up! I'm so sorry. I know you're here, but we don't be in here. We're working. What are you? Sorry, no, no, no. Yeah. Sorry, no, no, no, we're just passing through. Yeah. What? To where?

To our new place of employment. Yes, to the back behind the kitchen. To the back behind out of the kitchen. Wait, hold on. Yeah. What's behind the kitchen? So you know that behind the kitchen is an exit to the building. There's just the kitchen entrance,

that there's a grate in the back of the kitchen that you can use as a service access to the vault corridor. So someone needs to, we need to block that. I cast Message. I cast Message. Oh, she has Message. Okay. I cast Message to Fy'ra, and I say, oh, it's a cantrip.

Oh! Yeah. I've never had a cantrip. That's fine. I don't prefer to burn a spell slot. I look at you and I point at you and I go, We need to get everyone out of this kitchen. We got to figure something out. Wait, can you cast measures at multiple people?

No. One at a time, yeah. Fine, you can just use it over and over, can't you? Welcome to the cantrip! Now keep in mind, there's components to casting a spell. So there's a guy that was like, what are you doing? And then you went, hold, please.

So I think he's going to let you do that one time before he's like, leave? I do it to fear. But I work here. Do you work in the kitchen? Because those feathers would catch on fire. We're inspectors. We're here to inspect the back of the kitchen.

Yes. Dressed like an ostrich. Oh, uh. Yeah. We're short-staffed. We like it. It's part of our company policy. We're short-staffed right now, so I'm leading the inspectors around to inspect everything, because everything needs inspecting.

And so far, y'all got an F rating. Yeah, so you know what? You should really shape up. Internally? I see dirt around here, and someone just picked up a lobster and put it on the plate. Okay, you can ignore that part. All right. Give me a deception check.

And I'm going to make it a flat roll. I would give you disadvantage, but because you're both, one of you has to give it. So who's doing the deception check? More. I got a plus four. What do you got? A plus nine. Yeah, more. Go do it.

Oh yeah, duh. 13. Oh, thank god. 13. Plus nine. Oh, thank god. 22. 22! This guy looks so confused. It is weird that we're doing inspections before a gang war. Well, you should expect the unexpected when you're inspecting.

Yeah. The hell's... Okay, sure. What do you need from us? Nothing, just get out of the way. We actually need everyone to exit the kitchen. Oh yeah. But it's Breakfast Rush. It's okay. There's a get out of the way. We actually need everyone to exit the kitchen. Oh yeah. But it's breakfast rush. It's okay. There's a lot going on right now.

I think the last thing on people's minds is breakfast. But it's the most important meal of the day. Okay, okay. He gives a sharp whistle and everyone immediately stops at their stations and looks at him and he just points. Do you want us to wait inside or outside? Outside.

Wait, inside. Either inside in the buffet or outside the building entirely. Inside the buffet. Okay. Yeah. Can we grab a bite to eat? That's my choice. Yeah, you can no help it. I make choices!

Come on! And he gestures and everyone immediately follows him out. This goes from a room with 22 people in it to zero in under 30 seconds. You see through the little bit of a window in those doors as they all immediately make their way over to the breakfast bar and start eating breakfast. Good, they deserve it.

Getting some muffins. It's funny, breakfast being the most important meal of the day is actually a big racket created as a marketing ploy by the big farming association there. Oh. Yeah. So I just engage with it by having breakfast for every other meal.

Ha! So anyway, let's continue. Fy'ra is visibly confused, not being able to be in charge. She's a little bit, you can tell she's frustrated because she keeps not knowing what to do. So I'm just immediately, now that everybody's left, I'm charging forward and looking for this grate.

Okay, yeah. Give me an investigation check. 15. 15. Yeah. With a 15, Mor, did you show people the blueprints? Yep. Yeah. Cool. 100%. Why would I not have done that?

Are they still in your sandwich? Yeah, we saw, no, we did. We did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so you were vaguely aware of where to look, and you get to that part of the kitchen, and you see a massive stone table rolled over and looking under, you see that little bit of a decline where a grate would be.

But there's a 300-pound stone table over it. Ah. Does anyone have any arcane ability to do something with this? Want me to Eldritch Blast it? No, we shouldn't destroy it. What, the table? We don't want to bring too much. The grate is under here.

Well, you all take a corner, right? Yeah, 300 pounds? Yeah. All right, let's go. Okay. I weighed this much when I was 14. With her, she's been working out. We're dense. Use your legs! She starts pushing with,

she's still newly used to her new strength. Okay, so who all's pushing? One, two, three. I guess everybody. It doesn't have to be. Do you dream of labor? You don't got to. Okay, so if you're pushing, go ahead and give me an Athletic.

Five of them. My Athletics modifier is negative. Trying new. Should I just stay out of it? You can do whatever you feel in your heart. I think Moira would try. Yeah. I think she'd try. Yep.

I think this is Fy'ra's moment to shine. Oh good. This was a natural 20 plus eight. Yes! Oh my god! She moves at all. Well, you know what? Wait a minute. I got a strong six. I got a strong six.

Seven minus one. Three, two, three, two. How'd you do? 16. Ooh, okay. I rolled a number. The exact same. Aw, okay.

Y'all are thinking up these rolls. My buddy. We moved two couches together. Yeah, yeah! Oh man, okay, so Mor and Opal begin to push and are very quickly brushed gently to the side as Dariax and Dorian fall in behind them and begin pushing. Then in a corner of her own,

with that natural 20, Fy'ra Rai just gets the exact right angle, and with one mighty push, you guys send this thing, not flying, but it moves easily and briskly the fuck out of the way. Nice. You see a two-foot wide grate. She feels much more in her element now,

because she's a little less rattled, but feeling less inadequate than she was. Right. The grate, is it deep? Is the vault underneath the grate? We don't know. We have to open up the gate and find out. I will say, though, did you, where is Cyrus?

He's your problem. He is my problem. So what did you tell him to do? To bring or not to bring is always the question with your idiot brother. Yeah. Do you want a liability? I would absolutely have a wonderful time exploiting. I've been thinking about it. Do you want to liability? I would absolutely have a wonderful time exploiting.

I've been thinking about it. Do you want to have a chance to choose? I decided to, Cyrus begged to partizan. He did. Are you just asking me that? Yeah. Or do I need to flashback to the plan?

Oh my god. Already? Already? Already? Already. He's just going to lay it out. All right. All right. All right. I'm going to flashback to the plan.

Yay! So. You have to let me go. I spent my flippy chippy. This is a- Flippy chippy! That's what I'm calling it. Add it to the list. That's good, that's good. As the rest of them are discussing the real plan,

Cyrus is doing what you're doing right now. I know you want to go. How am I supposed to get not bad at shit? I know you want to go and... I should go. Yeah, you are going to go. All right, here's what we do. Then I'm going to whisper into his ear,

and then you'll find out what I whispered later. Okay. All right. I love a surprise as a DM. Horrified. You did this! You did this! You gave me the power! Yes! All right.

I stand by it. At some point, someone has to explain any of this to me, but it's okay, I'm here for the ride. You know what? You get a little puff of wind nudge from Cyrus, who's been watching, per the plan, out the little window into the main buffet. He gets your eyes and goes,

There's people coming. There. Oh, that's part of the plan. Oh my god! He pushes through the doors and went, that's the distraction, got it. I'm a bard! You hear him just walk out and begin to yodel.

He has my lute. Yes! He has my blue lute, not my new mandolin. Yeah. He starts strumming it. Oh god. Anyone hear wonder what? Very well, actually.

With a 19 on the die. He just... Oh, his whole set was so beautiful. And he is just a little bit of a distraction. As you guys see, a couple guards and security members of the casino are coming in, speaking with the members of the kitchen, and then interfacing with Cyrus,

who's just explaining, gesticulating wildly, and continuing to yodel. Love it. Giving you guys a little time. I should grab the grate and just start yanking. Yeah. On the grate. I'm going to let that natural 20 absolutely ride. And the follow through on the push,

you just reach down and rip the grate up. You see these metal pins rip out of the ground and you're just holding a 50-pound metal grate in your hand effortlessly. You look down and see a dark tunnel. Now, if you trust the blueprints, you know it will drop down 10 to 12 feet into a corridor. This is where air was coming in in a subterranean corridor.

I was going to say, while you're getting the grate out, you want to go ahead and move the table back as we're exiting? It sounds like a smart play. All right. Because we could probably get underneath the table through the open grate now that it's off, right? Yeah.

Yeah. And then we can maybe put the grate back on once the last one of us goes. Everybody else down first, and then we'll move it over as we go. Sounds like a plan to me. All right. I'll go down first. Okay.

I'll go second. I'll jump down coolly because I'm really good at acrobatics. Yeah, give me an acrobatics check. Okay. Please, please, please. It's going to be great. Ah, it was an 18, but now it's a four. Oh, what?

That's a 14. Oh, look. With a 14 and being the first one to drop down, no one knows what it looked like. And they'll imagine it. Very cool. The 14 is the intensity and calm command with which you exited the scene.

They have no idea that you, you know when you jump and you get that little stinger in your ankle when you hit and you're just like, but no one caught it, and no one can see you down here. It's pitch black, but roughly a 12-foot drop. Cool. Who's next? I'm next.

I think I want to disguise self into Fern because she's got those big old legs. Disguise self doesn't change your physical form, just the illusion. Oh, fuck. That would have been cool. It would have been cool. The thing you want is alter self. Really quick, I pull out my rope with my other hand. I've still just the illusion. Fuck, that would've been cool. It would've been cool.

The thing you want is alter self. Really quick, I pull out my rope with my other hand. I've still got the grate. Oh, that's better. I pull out my rope and I hand it to her with this and I go, go, go. Okay, great. And I'm just going to hold onto this with the other hand. And then do I have to roll for that?

No, I'm not going to do your roll. I can catch her. Oh, perfect. Now you have to roll. She can turn to my Loving and Grief. No, my Loving and Grief isn't that bad. How do you have to go to the top side? Ha! You're good.

Tool assist means you do not have to roll. Great. Heroes of the Realm. Thanks, F. Crawl down a 12-foot rope. Yes, we have to test it. It's just, she needs the help. I do need the help. I'm in heels.

Yes. So am I, but eh. You were born with those. I was born with those. I am not, but eh. You were born with those. Yeah, I was born with those. I am not going down next. Oh. She's putting the grape back on. She's putting the grape back on.

All right. You and me, we'll get inside by squeezing the table and then we'll grab the leep hole with the leg and try to get it over there. Still up here. Yes, fine. You want to help them move it? I'm going to help them move it. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So and try to get it over there. Still up here. Yes. You want to help them move it? I'm going to help them move it. Yeah, exactly. So while they're pulling it over

and I'm watching behind this, I'm like, just, just, just, just, and I brush them away and I pull them over and I put the grate over and just go, I have been working out. Down, go! Okay. I'll shove you down the rope. Amazing. Yep, and you drop down. We're all here.

You're all here. Cyrus is still. It's pitch black, right? It's pitch black. Great. I'm going to cast Light on the edge of my spear. So he watches the iron spear that he's carrying is now giving off this light, this bright orangish yellow torchlight

that slowly pulses with energy at the tip. Is that enough for everybody who can't see anything? It's up to a 20-foot radius of bright light and another 20-foot of dim light, so it's a pretty decent space. Yeah, so it's suddenly incredibly illuminated and you see that this is carved out of rock that very clearly you know back in the day

this was an ore-rich area. You can even see that down here, where it was carved just to be a part of the day, this was an ore-rich area. You can even see that down here, where it was carved just to be a part of the casino, there are empty veins in the wall where ore was ripped out even as this was being built. This place used to be a booming gold town and has just been absolutely gutted. The dark rock extends far behind you

and far in front of you, but you all jump down in the correct orientation and forward will lead you inevitably to the vault. Do we know if there's anything else from our experience with the blueprints, do we know if there's anything else besides the vault on the other end? Is there somewhere that other people would likely be?

There's other air shafts, but the other ones tend to be much narrower and a medium-sized humanoid couldn't fit through. This was the only one that was big enough to get girthy bodies. Let's just be careful with that light as we walk under those air shafts, yes? I'm going to cast Snare.

What's that? On the ground, because I'm assuming the shaft is pretty narrow, yeah? The shaft that you guys are actually in is 10 feet across, eight feet tall. Okay, I'll cast Snare. Can I cast Snare when we drop? Where we drop? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, okay, I'm going to do that.

Wait, what's that for? How does that work again? So basically, I use, well, it requires 25 feet of rope. Would I have 25 feet of rope? Everyone's got rope. It's full boondock saves. Put it down on the rope. Well, you got your fucking rope. Basically, you use a rope to create a circle

with a five-foot radius on the ground or floor. When you're done casting, the rope disappears and the circle becomes a magic trap. Amazing. Oh, that's so smart. It's nearly invisible, requiring a successful intelligence investigation check against your spell DC, or sorry, your spell save DC to be discerned, and the trap triggers when a small, medium,

or large creature moves onto the ground or the floor in the spell's radius. Rad. Dope. Incredible. I'll snare trap. That's a flush. Stop it. It's so funny with a snare trap.

Oh, hey. Love that. I will ask you, what does it look like when Mor casts magic? Oh, that's an interesting one. I'd say it's pretty simple. I think she takes her little rope out delicately and puts it on the floor and goes,

and goes. You're so big. Yeah, she got so big. I went, wow, this rope is so big and thick. Inspiration. Oh my god, me. That rope caught feeling. She just does it for effect.

Yeah. So good. And the rope it for effect. Yeah. Oh, that's so good. And the rope seems to blush before it disappears. It winks and blurs before it disappears. And again, the reason why her spells are not super flashy is because she's just doing them for herself. You know what I mean?

There's no flourish to anything she does because she's always alone. So why would there be any flourish? Oh, that's very cool. Yeah, she is just brutal and it happens. Before you guys even really clock that she's casting a spell, it's gone and done and invisible to your eyes.

Oh shit, so we don't know. That's wild. She can make rope disappear. That could come in helpful. If we step on that, do we go? Don't step on it. Okay, thanks. Okay, okay. Yes. Okay.

You make your way down the tunnel. I'm assuming covering the light, like you mentioned, as you were passing air ducts and vents. Right, yeah. Go ahead, group check. Give me some perception checks. I've got your passives up here. Let's see if you can beat them. Can I also cast Detect Magic?

Oh my god, yes. You have enough time, if you would like to ritually cast it, so you don't burn a spell slot. Yeah, I would love that. You'll be walking for at least 10 minutes. Okay. Yeah, I'm not going to use my coin on that.

It could have been part of the plan, but no. No. 16. 16. That's so cool in here, it's two. Oh, buddy! Wait, what was it we were supposed to say? Wow. Perception. 18.

Dirty one. Oh yeah! Oh my god. At least it's a dirty one. At least it's a dirty one. Two brain cells ring betwixt the boys. It's 21. Holy shit.

Not a natty twin. Ooh the boys. It's 21. Holy shit. Not a natty twin. Ooh! Okay. That's cool. Ladies, the boys are... Hey, ladies! It's all up to you, ladies. The boys have handled the most vital of tasks, but the three of you catch first Mor

with your very good bunny hearing, and then Fy'ra and Opal, the sound of dust being kicked and someone slowly moving ahead of you. Do they sound like they're moving away or sound like they're moving towards us? It sounds like they are slowly moving forward. With that 21 more, I'm going to say

the pace seems unhurried and probably 80 feet away. When you say moving forward, though, you mean away from us, toward the vault? Yes. Well, it's not moving. The sound you're hearing isn't moving as fast as you, so you're catching up to it. Right, right, right. So, yeah.

I want to use it on stuff. Yeah. Is there any way that I can get up to 30 feet, I guess sneaky sneak, up to 30 feet away from it? Of course. I will advise, because you've got dim light to about 40 feet away from you, correct? That you are going to want to exit his aura of light

in order to sneak up. Do you have darkvision? No. I'm coming with you. Okay. So we'll pause them. I want to go with them, too. I will put my cloak over my head. Can you see in the dark?

No. Do I have? No. As these two are, just keep an eye on these two buffoons. She's so angry right now, in general. I love it. And we'll go ahead. Oh, I'll send my little All Set Ted 2 again.

There you go. Ted 2 again. Go with the ladies. Love you. And you see her as it scampers down your body and is going to hitch a ride. Hitch a ride. Actually, hitch a ride with her.

I have fire for her. I put it under my belt. Hitches a ride on your shoe. Okay. Loves a heel. She can see in the dark. Yeah, she can see in the dark. If you hang back, you can warg through it

and have the benefits of darkvision as you look through it. Love it. I love it so much. So, but can I see where this guy, because again, you said it's about 10 feet across? Yeah. So can I, I just want to know when I'm 30 feet away. Yeah. Okay. So you sneak forward and you leave that aura

of even dim light and you're in complete darkness. So you do not have darkvision, correct? No. But you've got, yeah. When I'm with her, I use my, oh my god,vision, correct? No. But you've got, yeah. I use my, oh my god, wait, wait, wait. It's called Thieves' Cant. It's a secret mix of dialect, jargon, or code

that allows you to hide messages in seemingly normal conversation. Cool! It takes four times longer to convey such a message, but I tell her, in so many words, tell me when we're 30 feet away. For what it's worth, she doesn't speak thieves' camp.

Do you really think I'm suspicious? You could just whisper, but you could just tell her, close to her ear. Oh my god, I can cast Message! Yeah, I go. I know you're loving using this cantrip, but the whispering you would do to cast the spell, you could just whisper the information.

It's cool that there's a cantrip. Okay, it's a cantrip. You do the cantrip and it's very cool. I could just whisper it in her ear. But then she doesn't understand you. Yeah. Maybe you can sing it. Let's say for me, message is always

and they automatically know. Stop doing that! She says out loud, she goes, stop doing that! Her magic is function over flourish, but when she can't, she tries to flourish herself. I really tried so hard. You're trying. I'm going to impress my new friends.

Oh, you do it. F for effort, F for style. Yeah, okay, so I'm sorry. I just think that took three minutes. I trust, as we're sneaking forward, I go, I don't have darkvision. I can't see in the dark. I don't know what darkvision is.

I can't see in the dark. I reach back to her, I take her hand, and I put it on my shoulder, and I move forward with her. Quick question. Your hair is on fire. It's under the cloak, I said. All right. It's under the cloak.

You've seen my, I did say it, it's under the cloak. You said it. You said it. Immediately, I pop up between the two of them, and I go, what's going on, guys? Shh! And I go, shink, and I pull out my mood-touched scimitar and light up the room.

No! Oh my god! I was trying. That's an opal move right there. I rolled a two on perception. I don't know anything's wrong. What? Inspiration, as 30 feet away, a little bit of silvery, beautiful moonlight

illuminates the hall and you see this massive form. The ceiling is about eight feet and this person's head is turned just to the side. Maybe they couldn't stand up all the way. Oh, for fuck's sake. As they slowly turn, catching the glint of the light on the walls, you see the burning purple ember

of what looks like a cigar between this half-giant's lips. What? As he takes a, he inhales through his nose, not breathing the cigar, but exhales through it, and the room suddenly fills with purple vapor that clouds your eyes and clouds your lungs. Does he look like the description of the half-giant that I got from Juesi?

What you catch before the room is filled with purple smoke is, yes, a half-giant covered in these massive dark metal piercings along his jaw and his ears and through his nose and eyebrow. And he sees you and fills the room with smoke. Can I get a constitution saving throw from everyone except for Dariax? Damn it!

I was going to make it! We're going to make it after all! Hold on, hold on, hold on. You might want to say except for Dorian, too, because as I see the purple smoke coming in, I take a big, deep breath and use Unending Breath. Oh, I hate it here.

Yes! Okay, you don't need to make the con save, and you were standing far enough back that you did. Now Dariax, you're cool, you saved it. Also does not have to make one. Thanks! Your names are so confusing and bad for me. Dyr-X is in the back,

still breathing into the cold air and looking at it with his little spear, doesn't even notice any of this happening. You just see a little bit of purple. Whoa. Oh. How'd we do? That's a nine. Mm? Oh, a 15.

Mm-hmm. You don't have to do anything. I got an eight. Nine, eight, and 15. You make it, so you're not going to take any damage. You're going to take... But wait, what kind? Oh, you know what's coming.

Eight points of poison damage. I can't resist it! She can take it! She's immune to poison damage. She's immune to the poison condition. No! Wait, oh, Spider Queen, we need to talk. Wait. You said poison damage. You're resistant to poison damage,

which means out of the eight, you're only taking four. But you don't get poisoned, which would be an extra condition on top of it. Okay, so minus four. Correct. And you're going to take eight points of poison damage. I was just doing the math. Not a ballgame?

As soon as I see his face, as soon as I see his face, I tear my cloak down, I go running forward and I go, What are you doing? Oh. Do you get in his face? I get right in his face. Oh my god, she's going nuts. What do you think you're doing? She told us to come down, not you!

Yes, bitch. Make an arcana check for me. Oh my god. Yes, bitch. 21. Okay. As you get in his face with this perfect bluff, you see the way he scans you.

Even though your hood's thrown back, he seems to see through your cloak as he blinks through this vapor that our Arcanachak would tell you that this smoke is not just a poison effect, but it's a magical effect, and he sees you. He sees you. He sees you and you watch his gaze go across your tattoos. Your sister doesn't have those.

He goes, No, no, no, no, no. You're not her. But I had no idea she had family. I'm attacking. I'm going to need everyone to roll initiative. This is my question. Yes? If I Misty Step behind him,

do I get an opportunity attack? Or like? It wouldn't be an opportunity attack. It would be a sneak attack, but we're calling initiative before you get that. Yeah, I know! I don't want to be your victim! Look, the moment someone says I do a hit,

we start the fight. I do a hit, okay? I'm going to take disadvantage because I don't know what's happening. Yeah! Oh! All right. Oh, hell yeah. Okay.

Okay, one chicken. Boop. I didn't make another one because I'm dumb. Plus three. That's not too bad. That's not the worst. So I'll do my four. Oh no. I heard that and I got sad.

25 to 20. 21. 22. Okay. Nice. For real? Hell yeah. Today is being cracked at 21. All right. 19 to 50? Yes. No, no, no, 19 to 50? Yes.

No, no, no, no, I'm 13. 17. No, 14. You added your name. 17. Sorry. I got you, 17. Thank you so much. The way the numbers came out of your face ended temporarily my ability to understand math.

I got it. I never had it! I just suddenly felt like, whoa, there's one brain cell and it's grinding. You're hearing Eldritch language. Yeah. It's grinding. I rolled a. Is that primordial? What's that?

I think that! It's a Thieves' Con, don't you know? Oh yes, of course. Don't you speak it? 14 to 10. Me, I rolled a 14. I'm not trying, I promise. Don't forget, you have to roll your familiars initiative.

Ah, yes, indeed. Yes. What's her initiative? Let's see. Oh, it doesn't have it. It's the same. Plus two or three? Oh, that bitch rolled, you said plus two. Plus two, your dexterity is at 16.

Oh, it's a 16. All right. Oh, okay, okay. She goes before me. Amazing. All right, Ted, to a guess. And Dariax, how'd you do, buddy? I got four. Oh, buddy.

Checks out. Okay, okay. Strong numbers. Incredible. Strong numbers. And my bad boy rolled like shit. Clinkety clink. Womp womp. First up is Mor. Ooh! Plus is Mor! Oohomp womp. First up is more. Ooh! Plus is more!

Ooh, ooh, ooh! Plus is more. I'm going to say, okay. I'm going to say for flavor, I'm a misty step behind him. Yes, that's one of my favorites. You said the useless spell slot. No, it's just once per, it's a fey thing.

Cute. It's a fey thing. Love it. I'm so sorry. So sorry for being insensitive. That's fine. It's a fey thing. Cute. It's a fey thing. Love it. I'm so sorry. So sorry for being insensitive. It's my monothecary. That's on me. It's a fey thing that I have once per long rest. Yeah, cool.

So for flavors. I love this flavor. Give me more. I am briefly surrounded by a silvery mist. Oh! And also briefly, you see me, then you don't. I am like, I disappear, and I then reappear behind this big man. He's a very big man, okay.

He really is a big man. You really are a big man. You're really so big. Why are you such a big man? I am going to take my rapier. Yeah, you are. And okay, okay. Un momento. You do. We are. And, okay, okay. Un momento.

You do. We are honoring pack tactics and flanking. Okay. I meant flanking and not pack tactics. Oh, does that mean I have advantage? You have advantage. Yes, I don't have to give myself advantage. That's amazing.

I love dogs. Thanks, guys. Also, I'm going to give you inspiration for saying, now you see me. I already have inspiration. I mean, I have two inspirations. No, I'm going to give you inspiration for saying, now you see me. There's a new rule. I already have inspiration. I mean, I have two inspirations. No, you can only bank one. But I will say, if you can reference a heist movie

in normal conversation for the rest of this session, I'll give you inspiration. Oh, that seems amazing. Just a dumb goof. I am going to have that. You have to do it in normal conversation. Oh, here, I've never seen the heist. Oh my god. Oh, oh, I've never seen the heist. Oh my god.

Oh, oh, I rolled an 18 to hit plus seven. Yeah, 25 is plus seven. How did you do that math so fast? This budget is so quick. 80% of the job. Get it. Cool, so that's going to be beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. It's going to be D, D, D, right there.

I only recognize my d8s. No, that's a d10! Okay. That's a seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, and then I get to add 3d6 to it. Yes, you do. Add Roflur. So it's 11, and then a 5,

plus a 1, plus a 6. So another 12 on top of it? Yeah. For a total of? I can't, don't ask me that. 13. Or 23. I think it's, wait, is it 23? What was your first roll?

It's 11 plus. Oh my gosh. It was six. It was 12, yeah. Yeah, six plus, it was 12 plus, your first thing was seven, correct? 11, the original. Well, you rolled that in the plus. Yeah, perfect, okay, then 23.

Beautiful, we did it together, and math is fun. We mathed together, and that's what matters. I love that for us. Depends on the math we had along the way. So yeah, you all see as she disappears in this swirl of silvery mist and reappears on the dark side of this massive goliath, and just a little

as a little projection through his cloth as your rapier pierces all the way through him, and you pull the blade out, unseen, still in the darkness on the far side of him, partially, mostly obscured by that purple smoke. Anything else? Ma'am?

You haven't used your movement yet. Oh, yeah, I guess you're right. I think I might take my, because I can take a bonus action, right? Your Misty Step is technically a bonus action. Oh, is it? Okay, gotcha, gotcha. I would like to just use my movement to back out of hitting range.

I will warn you that backing away will incur an opportunity attack from him. Oh. But I'll have him roll it with disadvantage because he wasn't facing you and you used magic to get on the far side of him. Okay. So a swing back would be just a haymaker.

I'm assuming his arms are super thick. He's a thick boy. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Do you want to back away? No. Okay, cool. So you stay in melee. Oh wait, no, yeah, I do want to back away? No. Okay, cool. So you stay in melee. Oh wait, no, yeah, I do want to back away.

Okay. Sure, yeah. Yeah, sorry. I will make it with this weapon. Mor made that decision very quickly, though, for the record. It's okay. 13 plus four does a 17 hit. That's my exact armor class. Miezi beats it as he just swings back with a hand,

not even the weapon he was slowly reaching for, and just is going to backhand you for... That's cocked. Six points. Actually. Actually. Actually, I think I'm going to use... Oh god, where is it?

I'm going to use Silvery Barbs. Ooh, as a reaction. Because no. So good. Where is it? I'm going to use Silvery Barbs. Ooh, as a reaction. Because no. So he has to reroll and use the lower roll. Okay. And he'll roll it with disadvantage again. Fortunately, the lower roll was the original roll, but still hit.

I'm so sorry. It was a 14 and a 16. That's fine. Cool, so is that six points? Yeah. And then I'm going to give Dariax advantage. Amazing. On his next. What do you have?

You want to break me off a piece of how you do it? I would say, I think I'm going to block the attack. I get hit in the face, and then I go, Dariax, you're so big! Which is great because, oh, go ahead. I'm just saying, she's still holding, he's still guarding the top of the spear light because he's hearing things happening.

What's up? Now exposes the light of the whole chamber, goes, oh shit! Notices now there's a guy there. That's great, you've called him. He didn't know we were in a fight, so that was perfect. We're in a fight! I've called him to his senses.

Yeah. He looks over his shoulder as he hits him and goes, You're new. Interesting. We're going to move to Fy'ra Rive. She's incensed. She says, Whatever you have done to her, whatever you have done to make her work with you,

you will pay for it. You will pay. And she hits, and I'm assuming flanking, because both hits are with advantage? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because you're right up in melee with him. That is a 14 or a seven, so 15 plus eight is 23.

Hits. And a 15 is 23. Hits. And 15, 23. 23 points of damage? Or 23 to hit on the second one? Yes, both of them are 23 to hit, and then we have... 10 and 10. 20 points? Hits. Amazing. So 20 points. It hits.

Amazing. 20. Oh boy. And then I have my unarmed strike, because I'm just going to keep wailing on him because I don't like him. That is a athletics, no, sorry, strength, 18. 18 just hits. Okay. And I think I only, no, I, strength, 18.

18 just hits. Okay. And I think I only, no, I have two unarmed strikes. You could have used the ki point for it. Oh, let's not use the ki point. Let's save that for a minute. So yeah, that's it, that's it. Okay.

Yeah, you put 20 points of damage into him, and as you hit him with your quarterstaff, he takes it and then looks back at you and leans in and gets down to your eye level and goes, You want to know the truth? She's not under any kind of control. She chose this. I spit on him.

Well, now I understand why she never mentioned you. I'm going to leave your body down here to rot. Do I have anything on second toe? Yeah, you can move. No, I don't want to move. I want to be right up in his face. I don't want him to hit anybody but me. Yeah, love it. Next up is Opal's familiar and Opal,

oh, no, no, no, sorry. Dorian's up and then Opal's familiar. Cool. All right, so I imagine he's down at the end of this hall and then my gang is squatted up, Dariax in the back? Yeah. Okay. So I am going to do a little back handspring flip

back to the Dariax. And land next to him and be like, whoa, hey buddy. Hey, what's up, man? Hey, are you ready to fight this guy down at the end of the hallway? We're fighting this guy? I think so.

All right, yeah, let's fucking do it. All right, let's go. And I will cast, I will cast, first time. I will cast Brotherly Love. Oh, that's a free action. You'll cast Bromance. And you said the hallway's 10 feet wide, that's a free action. You cast Bromance. You said the hallway's 10 feet wide.

It's a good thing, because I'm going to cast Warding Wind. So around me, the wind starts to swirl in this sphere around me. Then I'm just going to sprint down the hallway, and as I do, since this is a 10-foot area of effect, it dispels any gas or fog or vapor that's in the space. That's so specific. Amazing.

That's so good. So as he runs, it just like just sweeps down the thing. You think I'm sprinting to attack him, but I'm not. I'm going to stop 10 feet from him, the area of the effect, the smoke goes out, and I'll just stare him in the eyes, and I'm like nine feet from him, and he will be,

unfortunately, Fy'ra, too, because you're behind him, sorry. He'll be deafened, and then the terrain between him, I, and Fy'era is now difficult terrain. Amazing. Can't hear shit. That's so good. Not for me. You're behind him, so you should be clear. So you're okay. Yeah.

Can you do me a favor and make an arcana check on top of all of this? Yeah, sure. As you're interacting elementally with whatever was in the air. All right, dirty 20. Dirty 20. You get a little bit of taste on the wind,

and I don't know if you've ever experienced this before, but you know that the thing that he was peering through in this is a mist that gives him Truesight. Oh, okay. You can't hear what he says over the deafening wind, but he's looking at Opal and smirking because he saw with his Truesight, your true form.

Yeah, you did. Okay, anything else? No, I'm sorry, you're deafened. Yeah, you did. Okay, anything else? No, I'm sorry, you're deafened. No, you haven't. All right, it's all good. Go ahead, your familiars up, and then you. Ted two again. I don't think she can do much,

so I think she'll take her full movement, which is- She's riding on Feederife's shoe. Right, I know. She's deafened. Yes, but do spiders even have ears? We don't know. She's deafened. Yes. And she's deafened. But do spiders even have ears? We don't know. There's no way to know. There's a sense. Little spiders having to twist or remake over here. Just two of its eight legs are like.

Teddy Cow goes by. Just tie yourself to it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I would like to send Ted 2 again out to see how close the vault is, if maybe she can take a look. Do you want her to say, like, keep going down the hall?

I think so. Oh, she's going to sprint down the hall. What's your spider's movement? 20 feet. 20 feet? If she takes the dash action, she can go 40. So she's just skittering down. And after 40 feet, she's still going.

She's still going. This was not the end of the hallway. Great. But nicely done. What would you like to do on your turn? How far am I from this big beast who's looking at me just so? Who can decide?

Okay, that's fine. We're not doing this with the map because it's just a little encounter. Yeah. Oh, oh, okay. Mm-hmm. Oh. That's fine.

Okay, well then maybe I'll save my thing. No, definitely burn all of your stuff. I'm not going to burn all my stuff. Do it. Please, whatever you do, do it. I would like to cast, I don't know, just because I want to try it, Toll of the Dead on him. Oh my god.

Amazing. Oh, does it matter? Ah, beans. Does it matter? Does what beans. Does it matter? He can't hear anything? And it's a toll? Oh, he would hear inside his soul. Inside his head, okay, great.

Does Warding Wind do anything to affect saves, like saving throws? I don't think so, but I'll double check. I'm going to say no, but give me a second, I'll double check. So you got a 17 on the dice. But I don't think so. Well, mm.

I think this is a wisdom save. You wisdom 15. I got a natural 17, so. Oh, so it doesn't do shit. Yeah. Yeah, sorry. The only bad thing about cantrips is they're usually all or nothing. You don't get to give half damage on them.

Okay, well, I think that's then I'm fucked. Is that all I could do? I think it's gone well. What's that? Do you have a full action left, though? Is that a cantrip? That was a cantrip. It was a cantrip. But I— Anything with your bonus action? I suppose with my bonus action,

all I can do is use Misty Step. I'm not going to do that, because that's a spell slot. Okay. So I suppose I will just stay put. Cool. About how far away from him are you? I would say probably—how far—I'm sorry. No, it's okay. It's hard to visualize all this. How far is—are we in a line?

Yeah, it's a fairly tight space. Right, so we're in a line. So it's him, Fy'ra Rai, Mor is behind him. Yes. Then these two are next to Fy'ra Rai, or just behind her? He's nine feet away from the duder. 10 feet back, so the Warding Wind is hitting him. I'm about probably 40 or so feet behind him.

I want to say that I'm maybe, I guess, 40 feet. I don't know. Yeah, you can go back. It makes sense that you'd go with him. Tol' 40 feet, I don't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can go back. Tol'Gren has a nice long range. You're good. I'll go back. I'll go back. I'll spear and all that business, yeah.

Perfect. But yeah, so you sent it off. The cantrip doesn't work, but you see that despite it all, at the center of that maelstrom that Dorian kicked up, he is just staring at you and his eyes flick up towards your crown. Because he can see it with Truesight.

He sees through the illusion. He doesn't look scared. He looks pleased. He will be. Lost. Okay, lost. Lost. It's a lost bread. It's not new.

People look at me. So he gets to go now. Okay. We've got one in front and one behind. I have a quick cue. Yes, of course. I keep forgetting that I have Uncanny Dodge. Can you use that on an opportunity attack as a reaction?

Oh, I think so. Okay, well, I didn't because there's so much going on, but I just keep forgetting. Wait, Uncanny Dodge is for dexterity saves, correct? No, it's literally just use your reaction to halve damage. Oh shit, yeah. So I can keep reading. Yeah, 100%. Can I have?

You want to have just retroactively done it? Sure. Sure. I'll give you, you get one. Yeah, yeah. Everybody gets one, right? Everyone gets one. It's hard to remember all your stuff. Three points to do character moves. Yeah, thank you, thank you.

Are you good? Yeah. Fantasy Mulligan. Fantasy Mulligan, Fantasy Mulligan. That's the person that's chasing you. Shut up, I was just. Oh, hey,odka, Fantasy Mulligan. That's the Brennan that's chasing you. Shut up, I was just saying. I was saying that name. Oh! No, I had the Fantasy Mulligan dream again.

Just a Brennan. I don't know what that is, but I know Carey Mulligan. Same person. Basically. Truly. A fine actor. Brother and sister. Brother and sister. Cool. He's going to go for both. First, you, as he pulls out this massive war hammer

that's actually not attached to the big bulbous base that is shaped like a ram skull made out of heavy pewter, but it's floating just on top of it. He lifts it out, and instead of swinging it in this small space, he wouldn't be able to pull it out to its full size, he actually just kicks able to pull it out to its full size. He actually just kicks the front of it and it detaches. He's going to try to kick it into you.

Does an 18 hit? Yes. I'm sure it's fine. Take five points of bludgeoning damage. Make a strength saving throw for me. Need to be an 18. Did not. Oh! It is an 18. Oh, then you made it. Okay.

Sweet. And despite getting doubled over by this hit that felt heavier than even the metal, would suggest you hold your ground and don't get knocked back. That was five points of bludgeoning damage? Yeah. Okay. I rolled bad. I won? Yeah. I rolled bad.

I won't twice. I won't. Then he's going to turn and attempt to grapple you by the throat with his offhand. If he turns around, do I get an opportunity to? No, because he's not leaving your threatened range. He's just reaching back.

He backhanded her and now he's just reaching back to try to, you know. Dodge that shit! Choke her. I need you to make a... I'll allow that, well, it's a grapple check. So go ahead and give me a strength saving throw. Oh. Uh-oh.

You know, that thing I know you're very good at. Like you're so strong? You have to beat a 22. Yeah, I'm so strong. Because I got a 16 on the dice. I got a nine. You are held unkindly by the throat meat and lifted just four inches off the ground. The very tips of your toes are brushing.

The very tips of my little rabbit toes? Your little rabbit feet are just scrabbling at the ground and you're grappled and held in the air. No damage. So wait, do I have to succeed a strength check to get out of that? Yeah. I'm never going to get out of that.

And maybe is why he did it. Is maybe why he did it. Oh, beanie! Maybe. Is why he did it. Yeah. Cool. What do I have to roll? So you're grappled. That's just what it is. You don't take any damage yet, but you are held. That is his turn.

Dariax, you're up. All right, now seeing all this happen rapidly through this shifting wind tunnel space, I'm going to try and shout out, not knowing that he won't hear me, but be like, Stop holding our new buddy friend and stop staring at Opal, it's rude!

Then cast Blindness on him. Yeah! Oh my god, no! Yeah! Nothing, no! He's got to make a constitution saving throw, which he's probably good at, so. But we'll try. Your bonus is so high, but I got two on the dice.

Oh yes, Terri-axe! Oh no. Good job. Oh yeah! I made her yeet a dice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, what happens? What does it look like? The compulsion of the magical effect

creeping into his mind is just enough to get his attention back towards me. The last thing he sees before his eyes go to utter darkness is me just going. Oh my god. Incredible. Hilarious. He is blinded. I think that means his hands aren't working properly, too.

That's never been how blindness works, but you know, who can say? He can attempt to save again at the end of each of his turns. Yeah. He's low in the round. That means everyone else has advantage on attacks against him,

and he has disadvantage on his attacks. This is unfortunate. Which also means, does that mean we have double advantage? Can you stack advantage? No. Do not stack advantage. What? Calm down! I got three, man!

Definitely, I can't. Wild. What did you say, Umbreon? Wild. You can hear me! Here we go. Incredible. Is there anything else you want to do

with your bonus action or movement? I'm going to just move a little closer, get behind Doreen over there. Of course you can! I got your back, buddy! This is what we call fun, by the way. He's very loud. It's very cool.

I'm like an oblivion helicopter. I thought I was out of range. Keeping you completely oblivious. Because I took an opportunity attack, right? So am I out of, aren't I out of grapple range? Oh yeah! That's fair. Ooh! Then he would have moved, so you get an opportunity attack.

Oh, he's still going to choke you. Okay, but I do get an opportunity attack. Yeah, but go ahead and get your opportunity attack in. Thank you for reminding me. Because I took that opportunity. Yeah, I super appreciate it. I took that punch on the face. I apologize for forgetting. Oh my god, no, you're fine. I forget everything.

That's a no, that's a no. Okay. It's a no. You swing at him, but you're also buffeted by this insane wind. Yeah, I'm shocked. I'm shocked that I can't hear anything. He's still holding you. Blinded, you're up. I don't think it's physically impossible for me to,

because he has a 22 check, right? I mean, we have to reroll it every time. Okay. So you can try again. Yeah, but I just can't. Also, know that you can still attack while grappling. Okay, yeah, I didn't know. You would attack with disadvantage, but because you have advantage,

it's just a normal attack roll. Oh, sick. Okay, cool. I will try. So he just brought you into extra stab him's range. Yeah, cool, great. Stabbity stab. He did really good stabbing before. So cool, I'm going to try to attack with my rapier.

Yeah, okay. And I have advantage. Or no, it's a regular attack. It's a regular attack. But I also have inspiration, so I could, if you want. Inspiration wouldn't function as advantage if you're trying to use it for sneak attack. Oh yeah, no, no, no.

Just, yeah, yeah, gotcha. Ah, a six. You can burn your inspiration. I like letting people do it after when they're like, that didn't go good. Let me try again. A 12. A 12.

19. 19 hits. Yeah! Stab him! Stab him, stab him. Cool. Do a hit. A little poke. A little poke.

That's it. That felt just kind of mean. That's it. That's all. You're just going to be so mean. Everyone's mean to him. I said, I'm glad I re-rolled. Eight, nine, 10, 11. That's 11, Pokey. Nice!

11 Poke-ums. Not very kind. Very rude of you to have done that. How could you? Yeah. Why are you like this? I don't know how I could. Okay, anything for your bonus action? Oh.

You are still grappled. Wait, I can't know how I could. Okay, anything for your bonus action. Oh. You are still grappled. Wait, I can't use my cunning action to disengage with him, can I? You have to spend your action to attempt to break the grapple. Oh, okay, gotcha. You can't use Misty Step to break the grapple, can she? Because it's a bonus.

You have to use it. I thought it was a cantrip. No. Misty Step is not a cantrip. That would have been so fun. Could I have stepped out of that? Oh no, because it's just a fey thing. Oh! No, that's right, that's right.

That's right, that's right. Oh, I'm so mad at my own. That's so cool. I don't think that there really is anything I can do for my bonus action. I mean, I have two weapon fighting. So I will, yeah, you can attack with your off hands. Sure. If you have a little dagger

in your hand. Yeah. Yeah, go ahead and make a little attack with your dagger. With my little tiny dagger. With your little tiny dagger. My little tiny dagger. Just to see, just to see. Might as well.

Ah, a three! Ah, yes! That's your mama! The reindeer was nice because it had that extra distance, but he's holding you in such a way that you're like, . Yeah, I know, I'm literally like,. Yeah.

Good looking out, though. You just gently tickle him. He's like,. You can't hear him because he's deafened. But in this moment, you're held and panicking and regretting the flow order. You're like, oh, if I had saved my Misty Step, I could be down and gone from here.

And what's the ideal play? And you look out and you see this group. I don't know if you're comfortable calling them friends or how you would categorize them in your head, but you feel, and maybe, maybe this is like a little bit of, you know, like the air loss happening, a mild sense of calm, because you can trust them.

This isn't great right now, but they're all here, and they are administering a full beatdown, and you think you're probably going to be okay. Aw. Aw. Fy'ra, you're up. I'm wildly incensed after what he said to me. She just comes running up. What, the truth?

He ran away. He just ran away from her. I'm like, oh yeah? He didn't run away. He stepped back. Whatever, I'm coming after him. Cool, I'm just saying don't paint this as anything other than a big, cool boy. 19 plus eight is a 27. Yeah, that hits!

That'll do. And another 27. So that is... 10 and 12. Thank you, Mac. And then she's going to go with an unarmed strike. Use the dice. 24.

Mm-hmm. God. She's a tank. She's fucking pissed. It's got to be dead. Four plus five, right? Oh, it's got to be dead. Four plus five, right? Oh, it's got to be dead. Nine.

What are you, dead? You got to give me the totals because you were just murmuring numbers and I didn't know which ones to listen to. Oh, I'm sorry. Okay, so the... Yeah, I lost track. No, no, no, the second one was a seven.

So a seven plus five is a 12. And then the first one was a, what did I say? Should I just roll it again? Mm-hmm. Yeah, I'll roll the first one again. The last one was a nine. Okay. 10 altogether.

I mean, 10, 12, and nine. Okay. Oh my god. 31. 31. Amazing. He is looking very, very fucked up, but as that last hit doubles him over, he's still holding on to more,

and he brings you, your feet touch the ground again as he leans down and he brings you down with him. He looks at you and as his reaction, he's going to, you see him hold his breath and push, and all of those spikes push out two inches out of his face. Is he Hellraiser? Okay. Yeah, a little bit. Okay. A little bit.

And you suddenly feel gravity on you and you suddenly feel gravity on you triple. I need a constitution saving throw. Triple whiff. You need to be at 18. Beat it. Okay. You do not take damage,

but until your next turn, you can only do an action or a bonus action. Your reactions are gone and your movement is halved as he just drops this gravity bomb on you and just says, He's deafened. No, he can still talk. He just can't hear you. He's like, You stay here.

You die here. God. I can't hear him, so I don't know. Yeah! I don't know what the fuck he said. I'm just like, I love when you say a cool thing and then no one gets to hear it. Womp, womp, wom I don't know. Yeah! I don't know what the fuck he said. I'm just like, I don't know when you say a cool thing and then no one gets to hear it. Womp, womp, womp, womp.

She's making eye contact. Oh. I heard it. I heard it. I'm right there. She definitely heard it. Thanks! Okay, so I've lost any other options, and then on my next turn, I can only take one attack. Mm-hmm. Okay. Oh, I have one action.

You can do an action or a bonus action. Reactions are gone, movement is halved. Dorian, you're up. Wait, is he still grappling our bun-bun friend? Yeah, he got the bun, Blaine. Okay. Shut him down. He's got my bun.

I'm going to drop the Warding Winds, now that we're dispelled. The first thing he hears in his ear is, You are not very nice, and I would like to ask you to let go of my friend, you asshole. I'll cast Dissonant Whispers. Yeah! Amazing.

That's 14 for the save now. 19 on the die. Damn, okay. Well, get ready to half whatever this is. We are rude tonight. Yeah, baby I love it. This is beanie. 14 halved seven.

Oh, well, six. Or no. No, seven. Yeah, seven, sorry. I was trying to round down an even number. Don't worry about it. No, no. Don't worry about it. Please don't. Seven. Okay. Yeah.

What does it look like? When I cast Dissonant Whispers into his ear, it's like? When I cast Dissonant Whispers into his ear, it's like tender. Dorian Dissonant Whispers tenderly. Because it floats on the breeze straight into his mean little brain hole. He hears it and he just hates it because he knows it's true.

He's always been an asshole. He knows that about himself. It crumples his resolve and hurts him from the inside out. He looks up at you. I know what I am. Do you? You're wanted.

Poska will pay dearly for you. He is bloodied and staggered by the honestly hurtful amount of onslaught and ass-whooping that you have applied, but he's still standing. He also says all that about three inches to the left because he can't quite know where you are. Mm-hmm. Oh yeah, he can't see you.

He's looking over. He can't see you. He's like, he's doing it like this. I can tell. Yeah, he just turned in the direction of where he thought the whispers were coming from. He's staring at Mor. He's like, you're so big! You're so big!

Oh no! I'm like, incredible. Anything with your bonus action or movement, sir? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, that's freaky. That's disturbing. So I'll use the rest of my movement to slowly back away next to Dariax,

and I'll be like, put my arm on his shoulder, say, shut this guy up, and give him Bardic Inspiration. Yeah! Amazing. Okay, you're familiar. Do you change the orders? Keep running? Yeah, keep running, but I would like, can I see through her during her turn

to see what she sees? I'll allow it. Okay. So you very briefly worgen, and you see that as she's running another 40 feet, to get about 80 feet away from where you are, looks about halfway to the end of the hall. Okay. That's only 160 feet.

That's not that far. Well, but for a little spider. Yeah, she's exhausted. Does she see anybody, anything else? It's just empty. There's no one else. Yes. Okay. Thanks, baby. no one else. Yes. Okay. Thanks, baby. You pop back.

I don't know how spiders sound. Okay. You pop back into yourself, it is your turn. It's my turn. Okay, I would like to do some Eldritch Blasting. Do it! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. I'm going to flick it.

Well, I guess both of them. You have advantage on these two. Yeah, you do. I'll need it. Yes! Oh, I'll need it. Please be nicer. Okay, wait, that's a- So the first one is a?

Wait, I had advantage. This is attack one. That is the first attack. That is the first attack. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I got to add seven. Okay. So that's 15. Doesn't hit. Great. I'm not going to use this one anymore. Yeah, you got to move on.

Yeah! You can join. Put in a timeout. Put in a timeout. The bad boy in the corner. Okay, here we go. Just think about what you've done. Believe in yourself, goddammit. Here we go. Yay! Okay, wait.

Okay, what's that? You still have advantage. I still have advantage. Wow, when am I going to get good at this? Oh! There it is. Okay, so what's that? 24. That's a 24. Wow, when am I going to get good at this? Oh! There it is. Okay, so what's that? 24. That's a 24. Absolutely, we hit. Yeah!

So the first Eldritch Blast just glances off of his armor. His pauldron is leaned forward as he thought he was delivering a very cool line to Dorian, but it was just to Mor. And the second one connects. How much damage? I'll tell you.

Okay. Here we go.'ll tell you. Okay. Here we go. Here we go. Seven. That's not bad. Yeah. He's not doing well, is the problem. My bad boy.

Not doing good. I would like to use my movement all the way, which is only 30 feet, so I guess that gets me 10 feet away from him-ish. Yeah, you're trying to move past him and keep moving down the hall? No, I want to get in with, well, I want to get him-ish. Yeah, you're trying to move past him and keep moving down the hall? No, I want to get in with, well, I want to get close to him.

Yeah, you can get into melee with him. Yeah. Cool. Like emotionally? Yeah, I want to get close. I like piercings. Yeah. I have so many. I think that's my turn. I don't think I can do anything with my bonus action. Yeah, anything to do with your BA?

That's my turn. Cool, cool, cool. Next up is my bad boy, who can attempt to shake off blindness. At the end of his turn. Yeah, it's the end of my turn. Bullshit. Okay. He's still blind. What's the DC?

Oh, so he doesn't attack on his turn? No. Okay. The DC's 15. He doesn't make it. Okay. Oh no! That's pretty nice. Sorry, buddy. We're sorry. You still grappled,

but he didn't attack. Yeah, you've been far too mean, buddy. He had such a cool intro. He had such a cool intro. Yeah, it was going to be a whole thing. We deserve this, actually. We just got truly, we deserve this. I spent 30 minutes trying to kill this motherfucker.

Also, after the taunting, he has to die. I hate this guy. I want to see him go down. There's also a part of me in this house that's like, I feel you. Yeah. You're like, oh, he's going to have some. Hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup. Well, should've given him lair actions. Anyway, theory acts, you're up.

All right, all right. I'm going to push past Dorian a little bit at this point, the inspiration in my eye, and I'm going to be like, looking at him close up, he's looking pretty hurt. Yeah. I'm going to glance over and make eye contact with you and be like,

all right. Time to go ahead and show him what it's like to, I lost the cool line I was going to make. Do what you want to do! I'm going to go ahead and, I'm going to, I'm going to, I'm going to go, do what you want to do. I'm going to go ahead and take Sacred Flame and hold my action and wait for your turn,

which I believe you come up next. Yeah. Oh shit. So I'm going to go ahead and focusing on the rapier that's in your hand, I'm going to go ahead and take the Sacred Flame and just see if I can get ready to surround her blade with divine energy. Double punch that shit.

What? Emotional support, my friend. Yeah! Look, big rogue wife energy, and we love that. You're up. Okay. What do you want to do? I don't, can I? You're still grappled. I'm still grappled, yeah. But you can still attack him.

He's looking bad, and you see this coordinated eye contact moment between you and Dariax. What do you want to do? Can I still give myself advantage? Like use my bonus action for, what is it called? Steady aim? Yeah. Look, I know how the rule is supposed to be, but I can't imagine steadier aim than being choked.

Right? I agree. I agree. Yeah. But I don't imagine steadier aim than being choked. Right? I agree. I agree. Yeah. But I don't have it. Oh wait, but I do have advantage. Okay, great. I'm good. I'm great. Everything's fine. Everything's fine. You're doing great. I'm doing great. I'm doing great.

Oh, that's a 17. Does that hit? Oh god, really? That's a six. Oh, five. So mama does not hit. Okay. You are swinging, and I'm not going to do any damage to you,

but you do feel lightheaded. Your vision is beginning to swirl. I haven't had him pushing damage into you, but he's just been choking you this whole time. And as your eyes water over, you just see that glint of Dariax's radiant energy surrounding your blade, but you cannot find purchase on him.

Anything else? I don't think I'm going to do anything. else? I don't think I'm doing that. I don't think so, but anyone sure if you had something like Trixum to do? Do I? Do I? I don't think so. Do I not? I don't think so.

I don't think so. Yeah. Yeah. It's all right. My man lives for just a couple minutes longer. That's great for me. I've added five to my fucking attack. Oops. Whoops.

And I, oops! All right. Oops. And I, oop. Dariax, do you want your Sacred Flame to go off or do you want to hold it? No, because I specifically put it on the blades and the blades didn't connect, so it fizzles. I'm like, next time, next time.

I go. Straight up. Oh god, the visual of this is so funny. So I have one action, right? Yep. Or bonus action. Or bonus action. Or bonus action. She's just going to take an attack.

Okay. Fuck. 16. Okay. Dang. Do you want to use it in your... Yeah, you still get two attacks in a single. Oh, I do still get two attacks? Oh shit. So in your action, you get two attacks. Great a single. Oh, I do still get two attacks? Oh shit.

So in your action, you get two attacks. Great, okay, yeah, that's right. Okay, that's two natural 20s. Oh my god! Oh my god! Who's on the phone? Oh, basic. That's so good.

There and there and there and there. If only they were two separate. Yeah, that is a little hurtful that they could know it's divided and conquered. Okay, so. That's a crit, baby, let's go! Let's go, so crit is double. So you just roll your dice

and then we're going to double it. Okay. Let's use a new one. No, eight, eight, eight. That's not an eight. The panic. The eight, eight. That's not an eight. The panic. The panic. Eight, so it's 16. 16, now add any modifier to the variant.

Oh yeah, plus five for each of them. So do I add it? No, it's just one hit. Oh, so plus five. Okay, so eight plus five. 16 plus five is 21. Perfect. He's not doing anything. He's still not dead?

He's still not dead? He's a monster! I can save it all my life. She's a bigger person. I'll tell you. No, I'm not going to tell you. He's staggered and barely holding on, but as you miss with your first and hit with the second, he turns blind eyes to you

and without making eye contact, because you're going to kill me without ever learning important truths. That's fine. It is fine. Next! Next! Next! You're going to learn the hard way.

Okay. He coughs and a bunch of black, it's blood, but it seems stained with those pewter piercings. It's an oil film on the top of his blood. You're back up. You feel that gravity lessen on you and you're back to normal again. Next up is Dorian.

I'm close enough to hear what he said to her? Yeah. All right. And I can tell that you are just incensed and not in your right mind. I turn to you and I say, I always thought you were the sensible one. I take two runs and I'm going to jump on Big Boy's back and try to get him in a rear naked choke

and grapple him back. Amazing. A choke for a choke. A choke for a choke. Okay. But not, yeah, not with the intention to damage, just to restrain. Yeah, all right. Okay. Go ahead and make an athletics check.

Athletics. Fingies crossed. Hell no! Pretty boy! This is technically not an attack, so I don't get advantage. Yeah, that is a natural one. Matt, I'm going to put this in your hands.

What? What? It's awesome. That's what you get for calling me not sensible. Matt, I'm going to put this in your hands. What? What? That's what you get for calling me not sensible. He would have made a strength save against this grapple. Due to his blindness, would you say that strength save would be made with disadvantage? I would say no, because it's a feat of,

from my opinion, I would say it's a feat of strength that doesn't necessarily require vision to achieve. He would still feel me clambering up his back and trying to. Yeah, it's a feat of strength that doesn't necessarily require vision to achieve. He would still feel me clambering up his back. Oh, yeah. It's more like as soon as someone grabs, then it's just strength before he's forced to. He also rolled a natural one, but if he doesn't have to use it, there was an...

A one for a one? What happens? It just, we both fail? Well, no, I don't have to use the disadvantage roll. That was the second roll. Oh. Oh. Yeah. Okay. So you grab him.

I'll say that you're on there, and you got him in the grip, and you feel him flex, and you feel under your grip, once again, those piercings extending out of the sternocleidomastoid, big muscles and tendons in his neck, and just pushes you away a little bit

as he hardens himself against you. I didn't like that sentence. I didn't either. I'm going to make it worse. I'm still slippery from the massage. No! It's bad here. What is this?

He's flying around? He's flying around? Bad here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yuck. Props for dropping some $100 words in that section. I know, I was going to say, well done, well done. You knew those words,

Priyanka. Well done. Oh my god. Okay, your familiar is up. Do you want her to continue spraying? I mean, that little bitch is, I'm just trying to make her useful, so she keeps on going. Okay, she keeps on going.

And then I, and she's not close to the vault yet. She's not there yet. No, no, that was halfway. Yeah. We dress so hard. Okay, so here we go. I'm going to go for it. Now I'm in melee range.

So I would like to cast green flame blade. And you're going to have to walk me through this because it's very complicated. Not a problem. Look at the flow chart. I'm seeing it. Okay. Here we go.

You say the words. I use green flame blade. I use green flame blade. Make a melee attack. I'm going to make a melee attack, which is what? D20. D20. You have advantage because he's still ding dang blind. Oh, that's pretty good.

Okay. And do I add anything? Yes, you're going to add your dagger. It's a plus seven. Ah, yes. For your actions. Actions, dagger a plus seven. Yes, ah. For your actions. Actions, dagger, plus seven.

That is a 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22. You got it. Amazing, so absolutely hits. Great. And you're gonna roll your dagger's damage. One second. You look good. It's thinking, it's piercing, it's an eight.

Okay, and now you add your green flame blade damage, which I believe is a d8 plus four. D8, wow, here we go, baby. Yeah! Plus four. 11. 11. Plus eight, plus eight, 11 plus eight, that's 19. Oh, Opal, you never not do it.

How do you want to do this? Whoa! Oh, Opal. You never not do it. How do you want to do this? Yeah! Okay. So where is he right now? What does it look like? Where is he? He's choking my friend. Choking more.

And then Slytherin falls over and slaps her. I don't want it. I'm still trying. I don't want it. I'm still trying. It's bad and I want it. Okay, so I'm still trying! I don't want it! I'm still trying! It's bad, and I want it. Okay, so I'm going to... He slipped away. Opal, on the other hand, is not all lubed up.

So she's going to climb on his back, and just the old tried and true, she's going to take her fucking dagger, and she's going to slice his throat open. And there's something that happens with the flame, right? It jumps from the dagger into the something. There's no other enemies. So unless you want it to jump to your friends in the way.

No, I would like, can it jump to his eye? Yeah. Okay, great. So he's like, sorry, but let's go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, but let's go is such a move. He's got the eye that's being burned. And you can flourish it, but at the end, I would like to say, and that's on the Spider Queen.

So she hears me because I am her champion. Incredible. Yay! Okay, I'm going to lean in a little bit on the subscription. Please lean in! And as the green flame reaches his eyes, it burns away that blindness magical effect. So he gets to look up and see you,

crown majestic as the two sights fill in his eyes and you say, and that's on the spider queen, but he hears your voice and her voice as he slumps to the ground and your face is the last thing he sees, and then he feels himself rising. I'm going to use, if you don't mind me

flourishing a little bit for you, as the Spider Queen leans in and goes, My champion, my good and faithful servant, how about a servant for you? As your Accursed Specter triggers and his soul rises up from his body and enters your dagger, you now have a specter shaped like a half giant.

Yes! That is now on the field under your control until your next long rest. I forgot they have that. Yeah. Oh shit. That's freaking cool. He rises up looking like a skeletal, burnt-out version of himself.

The darkest and most opaque parts of him are those metal spikes still protruding, even in death, from him as he looks at you. He bows. You may bow. Somehow, he's still grappling with you. No! He's got me off the scale.

He'll let letting go! And he's still slipping off his back. And then Jorgen's still here, but she's like, can't grab onto anything. He's like, oh, fuck. Spun that. For all eternity now. So when we see this,

when we see this, do we, like, So fucking rad. I've never seen it before. No. So I'm just going to stagger back, not sure of whether I'm supposed to attack that thing. I see it bow to her. Don't attack him. Don't attack him. It's from The Spider's Queen.

She's a really nice person. You guys should know that. And she's in full Spidey look right now? She's a really nice person, I swear. We're best friends. She's not a person, I don't think. No, kind of a god, but she's a really nice person, I swear. We're best friends. She's not a person, I don't think. No, kind of a god, but she's a really nice god. Okay. I'm going to get on my knees

and start searching his body for anything useful. Yeah. Any information. Go ahead and give me an investigation check. You're also close there. Do you want to make an investigation check, too? Yeah, someone else make an investigation check. Someone else, please make an investigation check, because? Yeah, someone else make an investigation check, because I did not investigate.

You must have been choked for like two minutes. I'll give you advantage, because you had plenty of time to size him up. Some of you do it. I'll end up putting more things on his body. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I rolled a natural 20. Shut up!

Yay! We did it! Incredible. Fjord found his DNA. Yes! I know he is sensitive to caffeine. I know. He's got allergies. Yes, exactly.

I'm just like, but I see everything, so that's great. So yeah, you see this massive, incredibly heavy, burly-looking mace with a ram's head. That's the thing in his hands, but he's got pockets all over him. I'm happy to give you an amount of gold,

but is there anything particular Mor would be looking for on him? This is one of the main lieutenants of the Nameless Ones. And I'm happy to give you a big thing if you can tell me what she would care about in this moment as she's searching over his corpse. Any kind of map, any kind of location-centric thing that would help me to identify people

or identify different hideouts or anything like that. Yeah. Shit. Yeah. That's good. It's not gold. He's big. Yeah, you can go ahead and pocket about 10 platinum worth.

I'll take it. I mean, I'll take it. Yeah, whatever. Don't not take money. Yeah. I don't know. But yeah. Or a list of names or something.

He's a burly man. He's not the smartest being. So yeah, he has a notebook on him that he was a diligent note-taker in Nameless One staff meetings, you know, when all hands. Oh yeah! And he's got a list. They are holed up in the Dragon's Hoard,

which is another casino that you have interacted with probably two or three months ago. And he calls Poska by name. You see the name Poska a bunch and it's underlined because it's important. I don't know who Poska is. You don't, but you're able to pick up from context clues. She's the leader because she's always mentioned in decision-making capacities.

Like, Poska wants this. And Poska sent me to go find the vault. I hope Poska notices me. Yeah. She remembers Poska. She to go find the vault. If Poska notices me. Yeah. She remembers Poska. She's really cool. Mr. Poska. Yeah, 100%.

There's some doodles and like. Little hearts. What if? It's a notebook. Yeah, and you know, a little mean drawing of a faun that's scratched out. Yeah, and you've got numbers that they came to Chimel 1,400 strong, and they've doubled their numbers in the city.

Oh my god. I would say that I am probably reading all of this out loud. Cool, cool, cool. As I, yeah. And then finally, that his goal was to find the vault to see if the brumestone is being kept there. So you know what she's after. Okay.

And I can head pocket most of this stuff, right? Yeah, for sure. Okay, so I would like to walk over to Fy'ra and give her the notebook. You've read it out loud already, so we know the things, but I'm going to, yes. If there's anything else in here that could be helpful to you in the future,

you should keep it. Thank you. So he kept a journal and a bunch of notes about his secret stuff. Can I just start flipping? I'm going to flip through real quick and just see if there's anything about Fy'ra Kai. I mean, yes, there's notes about what her strength set is. He's got a bit of a Batman complex of like,

if I have to fight her, here's how I would win that fight. It's basically like a bad guy bullet journal. He has taken the time for the calligraphy as well. Yes. February! But first, coffee! Yeah, it's in live, laugh, love font. Excellent. It's February. But first, coffee. Yeah, it's in live, laugh, love font. Excellent.

It's crazy. Excellent. I love this guy more and more. She's mentioned a bunch in like, do you think I'm too many? Like a very ruthless sort of people mover that her job is sort of like corralling the like large masses of Nameless Ones

to do things and keeping tabs on the ones that are sent undercover in places. Just because I'm still going to try to use the gift to see if I, because I'm like, he was magic. Maybe I can find her again. Maybe I can, I'm just going to just do it. I'm not going to make you roll. Okay, so can't.

She can't be here. Okay, got it. We should move forward quickly. We've made a lot of noise. Okay. Yeah. Good call. All right, everybody. Can I see, my Spidey still sees nothing. No, she's doing great. I'm going to say by this time, with the looting and everything,

she's at the very end. Okay. And you hear. Head two again. She's just out very end. Okay. And you hear, she's just out of your telepathic range. Oh, well. Okay, well, I'll start walking. Yeah. Then you quickly, because you walk in people steps,

that once you hit that 100-foot range, she's like, hey, hey, hey, I found the end. I did a great job. What does it look like? Stop. You warg into her and you just wait the 12 seconds. Okay, I'll wait the 12 seconds. All right, you stay there.

Yeah. Ted, too, waits very diligently and then hops onto your shoe and runs up and reattaches herself to your earring. You are at? Oh, it's fine. It's fine. That is not good.

I'm going to cast Cure One. Cure One's level one at you. Just going to get that situated. So that'll be nine hit points. Oh my goodness. All right. We're tip-top and good to go. Who's leading?

What does the world look like? So you are now at a massive steel door. It's just a door. Is there a lever? It's the entire width of this tunnel. Eight feet tall, 10 feet wide. Yeah, let's go with the big, turny captainship wheel.

Look, I could have looked up anything about how a door works, but I won't. But we won't. Doors are mysterious in this land. They're dangerous and mysterious. It was the biggest boss model I could offer is just, here's a mean door. What do you do?

We'll be here forever. Can I detect any magic on the door? Is there any kind of spell? Are you recasting Detect It? No, I thought I had already cast it, but I never found out. Yeah, it's been less than 10 minutes. So yes, you see that this door is magically trapped

with some glyphs at the very corners of it. Do I have a glyphs thing? She points them out to the group so you can do a thing. I think I planned for this. Okay! Let's go! Time to shine!

So break me off a quick rundown of how you planned for this, and if we flashback to something, we'll flashback to it. But generally speaking, how did Mor account for this vault door? Okay, I would say that this vault door is probably similar to other vault doors that she's seen. Absolutely. Okay.

She somehow has figured out how to get rid of them glyphs because she's seen other doors with glyphs on them. I think when she saw the blueprint, she stayed up some of the night. She definitely got her long rest. Yeah, of course. But she stayed up some of the night devising a way to disarm the glyphs and open the door.

Amazing. I don't know if you can flourish it anymore. I love it. We don't need a full flashback to this, but we do jump back and see you poring over the blueprints, putting it together. We get flashes of the other casinos you've hit that have had smaller, weaker, shabbier versions of this.

The very first casino you went to, you could honestly use your normal thieves tools to break into and bypass, and you realize that as you were hitting bigger and bigger joints, you would have to commission stronger and stronger tools. And the set of thieves' tools you have now on top of your regular ones,

each piece is a foot wide. It's made of this magically guarded and warded symbol-covered metal that, this is the strongest door you've dealt with, but what's a little harder when you've been practicing for, how long have you been here? In Kaimul? Yeah. I've only been robbing play,

I've only been robbing casinos for three years. Correct. Yeah, so three years. But you've been here your whole life. That's not nothing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've made friends and you've talked to powerful spellcasters that know how to interact with glyphs. It's one thing to pick a lock of a door,

but it's another thing to figure out how to pick a magical lock. 100%. Yeah. So you all see as you kind of call out the magical traps in the corner and Mor steps confidently to the front, your black cloak sort of billowing behind you

as you immediately pull out this all-looking point. You go up and you slash through the glyphs in all the corners, disrupting the magic that comes from the shapes that they make, that the sigils are the important thing, and you scar and disrupt them. It's like a glyph of warding, right? It's like a really thick, thick, thick glyph of warding. It's like a Glyph of Warding, right? It's like a really thick, thick, thick Glyph of Warding.

It's not quite a Glyph of Warding because messing with those usually sets them off. But I'm too cool. But you're too cool. She's too fast! Too fast! Yeah, I will say that these were something a little bit different and a little bit meaner. And you absolutely deactivate them

and then begin to work on the door with these perfect tools. So as we come back up to the present and full speed leaving bullet time, I need you to make a Thieves' Tools check. So you're going to make a dexterity check. She just took out the six links. Plus your proficiency, and I'm going to give you advantage

because you've done this before. Wait, what does that mean, plus my proficiency? So your proficiency modifier should be in upper right corner. Oh, so plus seven? Yeah. 14? Oh, did you say advantage? Yeah, with advantage, and also,

if anyone wants to help her in this moment of concerted. Oh, okay. Dirty 20. Ooh! Yay! With a dirty 20, you begin the work. This is a very heavy lock. But you're maneuvering it, and you realize that the pins that you're moving,

you're doing it. It's just going to take a little while. So as you are successfully prying this lock mechanism open, I'm going to need you to make a second check. Still with advantage. Okay. Oh, let's ignore that.

Look, I can't see it, so it's fine. Should I reroll it? Was it good? Um, let me reroll it. Yeah, okay. No! Well. No, keep on the roll, guys.

Once you choose a roll, you get to pick one. No, we can keep that one. I can take it. That's a 20. Quad vantage. Come on. That's a 23. There you go.

Is it though? It is. I should go. I'll see myself out. Amazing. I'll be in my book. Roll a d10 from there. You want a low number. I want a low number.

Yeah, I'm just trying to coach your dice to be helpful. That's a one. Is that a one? Well, you rolled on the 100-sider, so it's technically a one. Oh, it's a one. Okay, that's going to take you a full minute to do this, which feels like forever, given how crazy fast combat goes,

but you guys watch as Mor makes incredibly quick work of the scariest door that any of you have ever seen. It swings open and a vault stands in front of you. Can I bunny kick it open? Oh my god! I would swing it this way, but you know what? I'm like that for you. No, stop it.

The fiction is great. You kick it and it bounces and swings open. You're able to gracefully step up as it opens behind you and gesture full showgirl stuff. I'm still wearing my showgirl feathers. Yes! You and me both. You not killed by Big Bad in feathers.

All three of them. Damn it. I challenge you to do it. Hurt, fall as she gestures and you guys see a vault filled with 50,000 gold in front of you. Do we see any brumestone? No. Make an investigation check.

Should we all? Yeah, everyone that wants to go touch the money can go touch the money. I want to touch it. 14. Oh fuck, no I don't. Wait, investigation? I'll do it for fun. Oh fuck, no I don't. Wait, investigation? I'll do it for fun.

Yeah! Oh, well, fuck. Yeah, it's your turn. Six. Oh buddy, how'd you do? It's six. 14. 14. 15. 14, 15. You do a thorough check of the premises

and you don't see any brumestone. However, you do know where the brumestone is. It's not hidden in the vault. It's holding it up. Correct. All the brumestone is there. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. I wasn't sure if there was a secret stash, too.

Yeah. Well, let's start packing it up. I turn immediately to Dorian. This is your chance. Let's start for your brother. As much as I would like to take all of this money, which looks to be close enough. It's a 20k bounty, yeah?

40k. 40. Which has made things a lot more difficult. Is there any platinum in there? Do we see platinum? It's a mixer of coins. I'm giving you the full total, but it's silver and gold. But they're not separated by? No, it's junkily put in there.

I certainly didn't do this by myself. In fact, it wasn't even my idea. It's okay. What? It's okay. What's okay? You can have the 40 and I'll take the 10. That seems fair. Yeah.

What? Mm-hmm. You're poor. We're trying to help you. Yes, yes, I forgot I'm super duper poor. Dorian, we all came here to see you when you called to us and when you told us the situation with your brother. Do you think we don't care more about you than money?

Yes, yes, but it's... What do you need this money for? I already have a bit of a stash. I just didn't... I want to leave this city different than the way I found it. As long as this cold is out of this vault, I did my job. Mar, you're explaining this calmly,

but you're aware, strangely, as you perceive yourself, that your heartbeat is rising. And you hear the very edges of birdsong. At the very, just the very edge of your hearing. What do you do? I don't know what it means. I don't know what I mean.

You're good. Okay. We should go. We should grab it and go. Just start getting as much as we can carry. As much as we can carry. Question, how the fuck are you carrying this much gold? Somebody planned for it. Oh, fuck!

Yeah! Let's go! Play it all alone. So last night, when everyone's bedding down, I'm sitting there in my head, I'm like, all right, so I've... Wait, no, I've stolen stuff before, and I can't tell you how many times

we've gotten there and realized that there was too much shit to take back. You didn't have a bag. So what we need is a lot of bags. I'll be right back. So I went ahead and used my disguise cloak to go ahead and look like, I'm going to go ahead and say that I look like

one of the elf bastards that we fought in the Verdon Expanse. Mm, rad. I act a little snooty. Right, rad. Walk around, tell me about, I'm here on Syngornian business, and I need to acquire as many strong but durable bags

as I can to bring back. This is a good trade opportunity for diplomatic relations and such with the people of Syngorn. Give me bags. Give me bags. Amazing. So I bought a bunch of bags. Yes, yes, Dar be bags. Amazing. So I bought a bunch of bags. Yes, yes, there he acts.

Yeah. You are walking through The Wish Fulfilled, this beautiful luxury 24-hour outdoor market that if you've ever spent any time overseas in Marquet, looks very much like the Suncut Bazaar in Ank'Harel. Did I say that right? Probably not. It's fine. It's fine. Yeah.

As you're walking and announcing that this is a trade opportunity, you need a bunch of bags, you see this short, you can't tell if they are a goblin or just a very short, incredibly old woman who reaches up and tries to grab for your fancy robes and misses, but just adjusts her glasses and thinks it's her problem.

She says, What about a magic bag? They make those? Yes. Aren't you from? Yes, I am, and the magic bags that we have aren't as good as the ones from Qymo, I hear. So if you have magic bags available, then it would be great for my Syngornian bosses.

Do you have papers? Like, to prove? Because I would be happy to set up a good relationship, but I just need to know that you're on the level. Of course, of course. I am on the level. Can't you tell by my thick, singorna accent? It's a very strong accent, yes.

Okay, okay. But yeah, I can provide some papers. Let me just, I'll return from my hotel room where I left them, as I am but staying briefly in town I can provide some papers. Let me just, I'll return from my hotel room where I left them, as I am but staying briefly in town as a representative. Yes, this all seems legit to me. I'm here at my booth.

Then I will return shortly. You're open late. I'm going to go ahead and- Never close. I drink so much gum. Rush back, not rush back, but briskly, arrogant walk my way back to the hotel room. Rush in there. Hey, we're going to have paper.

I need a pen real fast. I think I got an opportunity. Which I burst in, not realizing I hadn't changed back from the elven form and like, oh my, oh sorry, it's just me, it's me! Sorry, paper, pen, somebody, parchment, something. Go, there's maybe somewhere,

I don't have any on me, but let's go inside. Cyrus actually presents you with some very fine, this is letterhead from home. Really? It's awesome. I need someone to also write me a diplomatic letter. Hand it back. I'll hand it back. Okay, what am I writing?

And he pulls out a quill. That's right, that's his job. Like K.R.R. I am masquerading as a representative of Syngorn, who is here on- Don't write those exact words. He is actually. Look, that's a good note, thank you. He puts a sheet of paper under his butt

and starts over again. Shh. Just give him the overview, the general idea. He adds Flourishes. He tries one more time when he realizes he could probably write this in Elvish. Better. And he speaks Elvish. He's like, okay, hold on, hold on.

And presents you with this beautiful calligraphy set of papers that says what you agreed on. All right, I'll trust you because I don't read Elvish. Thank you. Oh yeah, that's good. All right, I'll trust you because I don't read Elvish. Thank you. Oh yeah, that's good. All right. Be right back.

Back through the streets to... And as promised, my papers. She puts them to her face and adjusts her coat. It's Elvish. I don't speak Elvish. Well. But that makes sense because you're from, okay, okay, okay. She folds them up very lovingly

and tucks them into the pocket. I can give you two bags of holding if you promise to return and we can establish some sort of deal. I would love to make you give me money for goods. But of course. What would that cost me at the moment

as, let's say, a down payment of our interest in this matter? Look, I understand that money offends elves. I'm so sorry. So how about this is Grattis, and then we can work out a deal later, if you remember my kindness now. Dariax wrestles with it, knowing that the bags aren't probably returning.

He's not returning with anything else. By the love of the elves and your eagerness in helping, I will. She genuflects. You don't know, is this right? Is this good? Here's 50 platinum. Just a word of thanks of your time.

Oh, Dariax! That's so kind. That's the third of one bag, but sure, I get it. It's fine. It's good. Insane behavior. What, for me? It get it. It's fine. It's good. Same behavior. What, for me? It's perfect. It's perfect for Dariax. He won that at the tables last night. This book, Dariax's autobiography is like

Dariax and the Magic Bags. Yeah, totally. It's just this story, and it's written in crayon. Your kindness has been noted. Your liege. I look forward to. It is. Your liege. I look forward to. It is indeed my liege. She hands off two bags of holding.

Thank you. Lethra Bodevrde. That sounds elvish, I don't know. Did you hear that? There's another elf just staring at this woman and at you. Oh my god. But she doesn't say anything because she also sells magic items,

so she's like, fleeced. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck it. We cut back. Yep. Yeah. Nice! Yes! Yay!

There you go! Amazing. Magical. I didn't get her name. Darius the Magician. I didn't get her name. Oh. Darius the Magical. Let's fill them up. Yeah, let's go, let's go. Yeah, so you are piling money into these bags,

and as you're going, that birdsong gets louder and louder. As you're moving across the room, you notice that it gets louder as you move to the eastern edge of the room into a little darkened corner. Oh. Let me investigate the corner. Yeah, we're playing Hot and Cold.

As you get warmer, the birdsong gets louder and becomes frantic and goes from singing to a frenetic, almost ear-splitting caw. Do I see anything around? Yeah. I'm not going to make you roll for it because you were being directed there. And you see tucked up in the corner,

the only thing in here that isn't gold, or money, just that isn't money, is this chiseled away piece of like pristine white marble that looks like a bas-relief of a human feminine face. Very symmetrical, almost mask-like. And there's intricate carvings of feathers extending out away from the edge of the face. All of it in that same pristine white marble,

but the feathers curl out. It's so finely carved that a lot of them have been shattered away. So just the ones that were laying flat let you know that those were feathers to begin with. And underneath, in the place where words would be, name would be, you feel almost sickened as your eye slides across it

and your eyes well up and blur and you cannot perceive whatever is under it. What do you do? I'd say I turn to everyone else. My eyes are all blurry. Just when you're trying to look in that space below. Of the actual statue. Your brain does not want to stay in that area.

And on top of that, I'll say, even as your fingers run across it, you feel a jagged cut, as if something was scratched and scarred away, but your eyes can't see it. You feel a jagged cut, as if something was scratched and scarred away, but your eyes can't see it. Your brain refuses to perceive whatever's written under that face. I think I'll just take it

and put it in the Bag of Holding, right? As you begin to put it in, the cawing gets louder. Do we notice anything? I mean, yeah, you see her beginning to, I guess, pale is hard when you're a bunny, but her ears are low and she seems almost trembling and shaking.

Are you okay? Um, I am. I can't see under this. What it is, put it down. Out of your hands. I put it down reverently. Immediately, I'm worried that it's the circle. Can I try to see?

Can I try to read what it is? You still have Detect Magic up, right? I do. I have Detect Magic up, but. If it's still up, I need you to make... I want that to hit. That's a nice long touch. It's called a Wisdom saving throw. Okay. Do I you to make... I want that damage. That's a nice long touch. It's called a Wisdom saving throw.

Okay. Do I need to make a save? No, you're okay. Oh, she's very wise. You'd never think. That's 13. You take six points of psychic damage. Oh, whoa! As just the raw magic coming off of this, it just gives you a flash migraine

and you have to turn away from it. You go to put it reverently on the ground and the clawing gets louder. I pick it back up. Give me, what is this check? Give me an insight check. As your songbird, this little token to you has gone from singing to screaming.

13, or no, 14. 14. That frenetic cawing. Oh no, I'm sorry, wait, 15. Oh, okay, sweet. Hey, hit the DC. Oh, heck yeah! That cawing feels like

that's the artificial sense of your heart racing. You don't hear it in words, but that frenetic, kill it, break it, get rid of it, destroy it. As the cawing continues to cycle and scream. Okay, so I'm like, I'd say I'm on my knees right now, holding this thing, but trying to cover my ears, so I just look absolutely ridiculous,

and I start trying to smash it on the ground to make the noise stop. Yeah. Go ahead and make just a general attack roll for me. We'll call it an armed strike, as you're just trying to slam it onto the ground. Yeah. Oh no, my armed strike is a plus two.

Oh, that's an 18. Oh yeah, that's great. You throw it down, and the first time you throw it, because you're already on your knees, you don't have enough leverage, and it just chips some of those other carved feathers off, and you stand back up through the pain, through this screaming, raise it to the top of your form

and slam it all the way down to the ground, and it shatters in half. The cawing begins to calm down, but it still exists, even in two parts, and the thing that is screaming for this destruction is not satisfied yet. You all see her do this. What is happening?

I got to destroy it. I got to get rid of it. All right. You grab one half and throw. Give me an attack roll. All righty. One, two, three. That's going to use my inspiration. Go.

Good burn it. That is better. That puts me at an 18. Yeah, describe how you destroy one half of this bas-relief. I grab it, go into my Wells of Dwarvish Strength. We've spent generations and generations working with stone, carving it, and destroying it.

Yeah. I do a full-on jump in the air to get as much height as I can, overhead slam dunk maneuver, and just as hard as I can onto the hard floor of the middle of the vault. Amazing. All right. It hits and kicks up some of that compacted dirt

and shatters away, and you seem to even see, as you look on with delight as you break this, it looks like a raven feather slips through your periphery and is gone when you go to perceive it as you turn your face to the side. One half left. That was weird. The carving is almost fine.

It's almost gone now, but it's still there. I don't know. Maybe it was one of your feathers. You're like, is that yours? Raven. What? It was what? Can I do a religion check? Yeah.

Give me a religion check, baby. Yep. 14. With a 14, the thing is, you didn't see the raven feather, but I'm going to give it to you that if you are moving over and looking at this weird bit of statuary,

I mean, yeah, the gods of Exandria are known to people. And I guess at this angle, at this light with those feathers, maybe this is something reminiscent of the Matron of Ravens, but who could know? How could you know? Who could say? Oh, we could say.

I mean, can I ask my bestie? She would know. Would she know? Give me a persuasion check to get your girl on the line. I'm just going to call her up. That's, oh, that's a suck. Per 10.

You are thrust out of your own mind as she refuses to be with you. Why are you being such a bitch? I'm your champion. You hear nothing and feel nothing but seething. That's rude. I'm trying to rehab your image over here. So I have a vague sense that this is

the mother of ravens, matron of ravens, whatever she is. Vague sense, yeah. Fine, Hat, you can stay gone. Go away, Pikachu! That was the Spider Queen! You're adorable, though. From here, these things all look really cute. Thank you. You're welcome.

Raven what? Matron of ravens. Matron of Ravens. You say we have to destroy this, you're sure? Oh, this bitch. Yeah. Yeah, yes. Yeah, I got it. And I'd say she's still on the ground.

There's crushed stone everywhere. I'd even say perhaps she cut her hair, because she's going around and there's like, it's nothing crazy. It's cool, it's not mechanically bad. I try to take her hands gently and I say, Stop, I will do this. I take the other half,

and I quietly speak in my mother tongue, and I say, Mother, protect us, and I smash it to the ground. Yeah, go ahead and make an attack roll for me. 15. That's good enough. It's an inanimate object and half of a piece of marble. You shatter it.

It scatters away. The pieces themselves defy the ability to be reassembled between your squashing and your slam and your slam. It is unrecognizable as the thing it once was. The songbird is finally at peace. You feel like whatever was bringing you here, past your personal mission to

reapportion some wealth back into the population, that this was at the heart of it, too. And you've done it. It's done. I look back to her to see if actually anything changes. What the fuck? That's pretty funny. To see if she's sated by the shattering.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm okay. We should go. We should get out. We should go. Oh, yeah, yeah. yeah. Yeah, I'm okay. We should go. We should get out. We should go. Oh, yeah, yeah. What was that? What were you doing? It was nothing. I don't really know what it was. Just smashing stuff?

Yeah, just smashing stuff. Hell yeah, that was fun. As we're shoving more gold into our bed. I think it's shoved, right? Yeah. All of it's, okay. Yes, it's shoved. I'm just going to do one quick nod to the gift to see if I can ascertain anything else about this situation. Go ahead.

Make a religion. We're going to make it a religion check again. Or, hmm. No. Let's call this, I love my one save. Make it a wisdom save, as you were just interacting with something very powerful. 15.

You try to focus on it, and you focus. It's like putting a magnifying lens over something. The gift magnifies things in the weave. It makes things clear for you, but the thing you are trying to focus it on does not want to be perceived. It's like turning it up to the sun, and the gift protects you from this thing that you've done, that you've attempted to see.

As you feel your eyes flash white and then covered almost protectively, you have that same sense, a single raven feather flitting at the edge of your peripheral vision as you are brought back. I asked for protection, thank you. Let's go. All right, all right.

So Mor shakes it off. Yeah. She whips out her blueprints. Not her blueprints, our blueprints. The royal blueprints. Royal blueprints. The royal blueprints. Royal blueprints. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She whips them out. So she goes, we need to get to the Sky Deck. We have to get to the Sky Deck because that's where the brumestone is, and we can leave on it. Yeah, totally. We can detach it. You're all very strong. Is there any other way out of here besides the way we came in?

I don't know. So you can either go back the way you came, move through the casino, and get up to the penthouse, and across and over to the sky deck, because you've not even been on the sky deck. You were never allowed to work there. You've seen it, but you don't know the specific access point.

Alternately, if you go straight up from here, you'll be in the Coliseum with an outside view of the Sky Deck, and you could scale the outside of the building if you want to go that way. So it's a question of, do you want to take the outside route to get up to the Sky Deckck, or the inside route? I'm at a loss here. I don't know which one's better.

When outside, we probably would be detected more obviously, but inside, we would have to convince someone that we belong there. That's also a longer path. Yeah. About the devil you know, we've been that way. Just a question about how bags of holding work. I speak English good.

Bags of holding? They don't get heavy. I speak words sometimes. Do they weigh much, like we're good? If we were climbing, they wouldn't fuck with us or anything like that? Yeah, you're great. You have Yellowing the Boots, which could take us, you could probably take someone, one of the smaller. I can fly, actually.

She can fly. You both have, no, you don't want to burn a spell slot. That's Meddra. I don't know why I'm saying it in this accent. I feel like, yeah. Oh! We planned for this. Oh!

It's like the coins come in handy. It's like they come in handy. Talk to me. Question, when someone Misty Steps, if someone is holding them, do they take them with them? Technically not really, because that's how Dimension Door works and it's a different spell.

Okay, so we have an option of going on the outside, correct? Yeah. Okay, I have a rope and a grappling hook. And in the blueprints, we found on the third floor, there are sweets. We did a little bit of sleuthing around that day. And using, now that I've really enjoyed your cloak, I used your cloak one've really enjoyed your cloak,

I used your cloak one more time at your discretion, like, if that was okay. Yeah, totally. To look like one of the, like, hospitality. Yes. And like room service, not room service, housekeeping. Yeah. So I kept knocking on the doors, and, you know, housekeeping. And one of them was completely empty.

Yes. So I went in there, I took the Do Not Disturb sign, which is in several languages. It's in Elvish, Dwarven, it's in several languages. I put it on the outside and I scoped out the room and noticed that it's a very easy climb from there, from the egress that we were talking about.

Perfect. It's a very, very easy climb. And there is a, because I can, there is a little cement part of the building that juts out like that, so that each of these windows are recessed, so you wouldn't necessarily be seen on either side of these recessed things.

So we can all get up to that high roller suite. All we have to do is climb. And I've been working out, so I'm strong enough to help anyone who needs help. So the one added factor on top of that that's not complicating because you gave a perfect flashback and it already presumes success, is knowing that you have to basically get up

through 50 feet of earth to go straight up and through some of the air vents and grates in and around the Western Arena itself. But it's still straight up. Yeah. You can still. and grates in and around the Western arena itself. But it's still straight up. Yeah. You're good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We get our spoons. We'll be there in 12 years.

Yes, I'll see you soon. Yes. A decade or so. Along with this, you see that there are little inset. It's just shaved off wood at the very edge of the tunnel before you hit the vault. So there's no air passages inside the vault. But you see these little wood barriers, and after studying the blueprints for so long,

you know that you can remove that wood. It's a straight shot into the bottom of the holding cells, where all of the animals, if there were animals involved, would be killed. The gladiators. Yes, exactly. Yeah, 100%. So you've got a three-foot-wide hole. How did you plan to make it larger? The hole just leads up to something where there's not.

Yeah, there's just a bunch of holding cells. I mean, three feet wide. That's wide enough. No, sorry, three inches. Oh, three inches. It's just a little wooden pole that comes down. I could Eldritch Blast it. Yeah.

One of my magic people, magic-y people did it. 100%. Yep. So you give her strict and specific parameters. 100%. Yeah, not going to make you roll for it. Again, you've already figured this out. You do force damage. You know that that earth is a little more disrupted.

It's going to be easy. You catch it at the right angle and you cause a controlled cave-in that pushes you up and you guys can just crawl. You have rope grappling hook. Yeah, folks. Straight up. Straight up. I can mantle. 100%. Straight up into a holding cell

and you can see in and around them. They're all swung open because they don't stay locked when there's no one in it. But as you get up there and you can see stairs and a little bit of light filtering through to where you would get above ground and you would just be in the center of the arena, you can hear people cheering

and the sound of snarls and growls and thuds. The middle of a fucking trawl. Off to the side. But it's on the, we're in the holding. It's off to the side and not visible. Gotcha. Okay, so we can get up there and then go the other direction. I will ask for a stealth roll from everyone on the way through. But if any of you rolls lower than a 10,

the people outside doing whatever they're doing will hear you. Roll well. 13. Beautiful. 23. Oh my god! Yeah! Okay. Broken clock. 13. Beautiful. 23. Oh my god! Yeah! Okay.

Broken clock. 15. 29. Oh my god! Yeah! You've never known more! Oh, dang! Incredible. Ugh, how'd you do?

That's an eight. Oh. I said 15. And a 15. Damn it, I'm the only bitch. It's okay. I made the hole. You made the hole. You did. And maybe it's that blasting,

and your ears are ringing a little bit, and you're just a little noisy on the way up and out. And as you guys are making a break for it, you hear the sounds of people quieting down, and then footsteps chasing them. I put on my Ring of Invisibility. Perfect. of people quieting down, and then footsteps chasing them. I put on my Ring of Invisibility. Perfect.

She's gone. You all slip up and away. I'm going to say that because you dealt with your own problem, that you are all able to make it up and out, and you're at the center of the Western Arena. You can quickly exit it and use your grappling hook and tactical plan to get up to the High Roller Suite.

Ooh! And you're there. It's on the third floor? It's on the third floor, just beneath where the sky bar. Exactly. So we got one more floor above us to get up. One more floor, and you can actually see up and through because the sky deck is a glass bottom bar. Right.

Oh, we can see everybody's panties. That's a good thing. Let's also say, oh! I hate you. But it's true. There's got to be something that we were able to, like, slight part of it that is opaque, so we're able to get in there.

You can see all the panties, baby. All the panties. The last panties that you think. It'sies! The last panties, it's dark. It's mostly men. It's dark out there. They're trying to find a den. So the idea is now that we need to get to the Skydeck and detach it somehow?

Yes. Is it attached? What's attaching it? It's attached to the wall. It's attached to the building. To the building. It's very rickety, though. It's only being held up by the brumestone. So we kill everybody.

You're looking up. We need to get everybody out of the Sky Deck. You're essentially looking at a glass-bottom bookshelf that's hanging precariously over the edge of this building. Are there chains keeping it attached to the building? How is it affixed to it? It's actually just stone architecture that's arcing up and holding it.

And how many feet is that total? What? The whole shebang? The whole shebang would be... I don't have a map of it. Including the brimstone? Yeah. You don't know where the brimstone is specifically.

It's not visible. It's not visible. It would be insane if it was visible. It's been a secret. Yeah, exactly. Okay, that makes sense. So the overall architecture, how big is it? Yeah, I would say it's probably like 60 feet across,

30 feet wide and just hanging over. Mor, you are the one who knows this kind of specifics of this and specifications of this the best, what do you think we should do? Are there people up on the skydeck? Looking up and through, you see that there are two people milling around,

but as you guys were grappling up, you could look in to some of the high roller suites that you weren't going into, that were still occupied in some of the people's suites that you weren't going into that were still occupied in some of the people's rooms, and you see that there are scuffles that are breaking out inside of the casino itself, and that maybe people are a bit too distracted

to go get a drink. Okay, cool. So where did I see on the blueprints that the brimstone was? At the very corners of this deck. Okay. It was written on that they were there, but everything you've seen, you were just looking out across this at this yesterday.

You don't see those points, but you do see decorative architecture and structures that are where the brumestone is said to be. Okay. Okay, so what do we have to do? We have to get up there. Yep. And get the people out. And get the people out and do, okay. Then break the architecture that's holding it in place

and then somehow shove off? Like, what do we? Is that how that works? And we would just be floating there? Yes, I think all we would need is a means of propelling ourselves. I assume it's weightless, so. I don't know about this stuff.

Because Broomstone, I guess I know about Broomstone. You know enough from reading the plans that it would just create, it's the levitation problem of levitation without force in a direction, but if you can push off. Can I say as part, can I also say as part of- I could be force in a direction, but if you can push off. Can I say as part, can I also say as part of? I could be force in a direction. Yeah, and can I also say as part of our previous plan

to meet up in that suite, that we had planned to have Cyrus join us there since he was in the back? You have no idea what Cyrus' plan is. No, but back in the room when we planned. We talked about it. Oh yeah, they have a plan. Could I? Okay, all right, okay, okay, cool.

Look at your eye, I love you for it. Okay, cool. Do we have grappling tools? Or you have grappling tools? Yeah, I have a grappling tool. Does anyone know anything about stonework or architecture or anything like that? You have your dwarven ancestry? I mean, yeah, but I grew up on a farm.

Your what? What do you need to know about stonework? No. I'm assuming it's attached on four pillars here, and then it's also attached to the building over here. Why don't I just show you? Yeah, yes! It's cool!

We're going to see it! I'll try to get a visual. I have an idea, but I don't know if it's possible. Bring it up, bring it up. Oh my goodness. Let's see the thing. Bring it up. I didn up. Oh my goodness. Let's see the thing. I didn't think I'd see this down. Bring it up. Let's see it. Woo-hoo! Okay, okay. Boop.

That's the bar. So here's the edge of the building, and it's like 50 feet in the air. It's literally just attached here. It's a balcony. It's a balcony. Oh, it's a very large balcony. It's a glass-bottom balcony. And we don't know how, and the mystery,

the marvel of it is that it doesn't have columns going down on the other side. Correct. Nice, yeah. It's not justback. And we don't know how, and the mystery, the marvel of it is that it doesn't have columns going down on the other side. Correct. Nice, yes. It's not just cantilevered. Correct. Ooh! Oh, I know what that is.

It looks like the bridge. But it does have some decorative things on all four points basically floating underneath that have like, that's the boundary. You don't see it under, you see decorative points on the top of it. Oh, that's where the brooms start. Oh, I see, I see, I see.

Oh, right. Unless it's all gone now and you're all going to fall to your death. Who knows? All right, well, all we got to do is get up to that and then I planned for what's next. But we got to get up there. Okay.

So how are you going to move 20 feet up above you? I don't know. Can I scale the wall? You can certainly try. You have grappling stuff, too, so just keep in mind, this doesn't have to be the most insane thing ever, but sure, give me an acrobatics check. I kind of want to try.

Yeah, do it. All right, I love it. You're powerful. That's a 17. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you just raw, bouldering up? I kind of want to just take my two daggers and frickin'- Hell yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you just raw, bouldering up? I kinda wanna just take my two daggers and frickin' Hell yeah, this is so good.

Okay, you have to describe that for me now. Do I have a rope? Everyone has a rope, right? Everyone's got a rope. Like grappling things? You use 25 of, I'm gonna say you're 50 feet of rope. But that's half, and you said it's 20 feet down. Sick.

Okay, so I take my rope. I put it in my teeth. I take out my two daggers, and I, without saying anything, well, because I got rope in my mouth. Of course. I go, I go, and then I run up, and I just freaking use my, because I got claws in my toes.

Yeah, claws. I freaking dagger up there, and I hop onto the thing, and I go, oh wait, aren't I freaking dagger up there. Yes. And I hop onto the. Yes. Onto the thing. Yeah. And I go, oh wait, aren't there two people up there? Yes, but you see that they're behind the bar. Oh, behind the bar. I'm going to have you pop up right here.

Ah, no! You could pop up here. That's good for you. Who's my boss? Who's my boss? Oh, your boss. What's my boss's name? Gaola. Gaola? Gaola.

Yeah. Gaola? G-A-O-L-A. Gowla. Gowla Mistwick is behind the bar. Oh! Oh! Oh, hey-o! Well, that's the high rule of the state. You put boss behind the bar. How convenient, yeah. I go, oh, it's the same as before.

I go up to Gowla. Boop. Cool, and do I have a good relationship with Gowla? She doesn't seem incredibly trustful of you, which is why you've never been allowed to tend bar on the Sky Deck. As you appear from outside, she goes, What? What?

What the fuck? Gala, oh, it's so nice to see you. What are you doing? I just had, I got a wild hair, and I just decided. What a joke. Yes, I decided that I really wanted to have a chance to tend bar on the sky deck, because you look so tired,

and I think that you could use a break. Do you have any idea what's going on right now? No. Tell us. Please tell me what's happening. I was sent here to watch the bar, but it's pandemonium inside. There's fighting everywhere,

and blood, and all of those unsavory types that pay our checks are murdering each other downstairs. Who was our boss's name? Our boss, like both of our bosses. Is she the highest up I know? She's the highest up you know. Oh no! We're out of olives!

I can watch the bar while you go get some olives, Gala! Please! Make the world's craziest deception check with disadvantage. It's always, always at this bar. Yeah. Everyone loves olives here. Kymal, known for its olives. Harvested from thirst fields.

Okay, okay, 19, that's my lowest. God, why is that? She's like, okay! Yeah, girl, yeah, girl. She gives you a look and then stares you down and looks past this very innocent, doe-eyed, bunny-eyed look.

And then drops her countenance and nods. She says, I'm going to go. and then drops her countenance and nods. She says, I'm going to go. Whatever you're doing, be safe. And you never saw me. I'm going to go get more olives. I would say Mor hugs her.

And none of you see this because you didn't just raw climb up like a badass. Yeah. But she is a sort of carmine red hobgoblin woman. Heavy set, very curvy, very pretty, long hair, always well-oiled and coiffed and braided. You hug her. After the first three seconds, she hugs you back.

You feel a little shudder come from her. Then she steals her nerves and holds you by the shoulders. Says, okay. Okay. Going to get out. I call after, I go, Be safe, my friend. You too.

She disappears inside. And the bar back that was coming and moving back and forth, she cuffs this young human and drags her back with her, and they disappear, and there's no one else left out here. Cool. So I...

Really quick, I'm just going to cut back, because this took a little bit of time. You all see as more disappears, but there's no sound of skirmish or fighting or metal or blasting. Well, it doesn't disappear completely because it's a glass box. It is a glass box!

We have seen her! You can see her panties. We saw her panties, huh? So, but we see these changes. Yeah, so you were able to watch from below. Oh shit, she just walked up and shanked that poor woman. That's cold. I respect that.

Incredible. Okay, I'm still so confused. So she climbed out on the outside and popped up. Yeah, she just fully scaled it herself. Well, how would we get up there? So, do we go? Oh, she brought a rope. I run to the door and I slam it closed to the sky deck, because everyone's gone now.

Yep. So I slam it. It looks heavy, so I. Yeah. And then I, if there's a lock mechanism, I lock it. Okay. I would try. Yeah. Oh, I allow you to do it? That's fine. Yeah, I take the rope and I, is there something I can tie it to

and then throw it down for them? Yeah, you've got these big ass lions hanging far away, or you can try to secure it to the pillar over here in the corner. Do the lions look sturdy? Yeah, they're hella sturdy. Cool. I'll go to that one and I'll tie it to the lion's tail and then I'll drop it down because it's a direct drop.

It's 25 feet of rope and it's a 20-foot drop, right? Yep. Cool. The only problem is that it jutted out a little far, so you have a little bit of distance to get that rope to you. Not an unsolvable problem, but a minor inconvenience. So you reach out and grab it, yes? You cannot just reach out with your raw hand.

I take my staff, I expand it, and I dig around. Dick around. You have to dick around my staff. Dick around. Yeah, you know. You can dick around my staff. Because that's totally a pitarak anything,

it's just to dick around. Give me a general dexterity check to see how your dicking about goes. 21. Yeah, you're able to get it this way. Reach out and hook it a little bit and pull it towards us. And I want to stay at the bottom of the rope

to help whoever goes up. I'll go up last. Nice. Yes, I think. Great. Because I... So, okay, I'll go up. Mm-hmm.

Climb, climb, climb. I'm not going to make you roll for it, you're fine. Your specter just floats. Yeah, you fly. Oh yeah! Yeah, he does! Specter! You forgot about him. Got that big boy. That's right. Got that big boy.

That's impressive. Oh, you have wings, you can just go. And I'm going to say, I'll stay down here with you, or you can go up. If you can launch the boat, I'll be the motor. It should be better if I'm underneath. I can get up to you any time I need to, if I need to. That makes sense.

I'll keep an eye out down here. All right. I'll go up. Yeah, same. Yep. Okay. I'm going to hang out at the windowsill of the suites. I'll go up. Yeah, same. Yep. Okay. I'm going to hang out at the windowsill of the suites. Respect. You're just watching and waiting?

Mm-hmm. Okay. Oh, I didn't realize I made that difficult because I put it all the way out there. I just in turn was acting. It's all good. It was only a tiny problem. They are. They all good. It was only a tiny problem. It's a little. They are. They are good.

So, there's no one up here. You're on the deck. Dorian's still below. Can we begin to, while we're waiting on Dorian to come join us, can we investigate? Oh no. Can we investigate? Well, someone should keep watch,

like by the door, just listening, I would imagine. Oh, I'll send my little Ted 2. Sweet. My little figure, but he's a really big boy. Summon that little bitch. Oh my gosh, that's scary! I don't like the whale one! That's not my nightmare!

Or maybe the ice will quit and find it. What if you had a snail one and you're just like, Yeah, I'm just like, I was like, is that a grain of sand? I literally pulled a rock out and was just like, there you go. Can she crawl under, is there a little crawl space under the door

or any kind of place she can maneuver? I'm going to say, just for the sake of making this still a little difficult, this door is a lot like the penthouse door. Okay. That, no, if it's shut, it's sealed. Okay, I think. If you want to open the door and let her out, you can do that.

There's no hole in the key lock? No. Actually, what you see is, it's very strange. This door, you have a sense that even if you looked through the keyhole and you can look through it, you actually see a wall facade. Ah. There.

This is a strange, magical door for an exclusive little bar. So I guess we just have to investigate and figure out how we can get this thing off. Its hold, its stays are pretty rickety, right? It's only held on here and there and there? Yep. We're here. So we should...

We just need to break them? Which ones do we do first? Do we have the mace from that guy we fought earlier? Yeah, you do. Go ahead and pull it out of the Bag of Holding and walk up to one of the stone pillars on the side and be like, how did he? Which one, though?

Because we don't want to fall. The brumestone, exactly. So according to the blueprints, the brumestone is in each of these four corners. So it would be the two lions and then these two little pillars here. So we don't want to break the pillars. We just want to break the attachments.

We don't want to do too much damage. All right. Can you do the history check for me? Yeah. Because you just recently spent a good amount of time on an airship. Yeah. Oh yeah. That's doody poo poo.

Oh no! Pee doody poo poo. I was just enjoying the peanuts. That's a seven. Oh no! With a seven, your intellectual curiosity was not stimulated by this flight, but you are aware of the fact that you saw, whenever you walked out on the deck of the airship, you clearly saw the brumestone.

Hmm. That might be a part of it. I don't know, you rolled a seven, so you can think, whatever the fuck. I'm a dumb, dumb man. That was no information. And you know that, I can't talk to you rolled a seven, so you can think. I'm a dumb, dumb man. That was no information. And you know that I can't talk to you. I'm downstairs.

Click, click, I click my heels together. Yay! And I fly up along the side right behind Morgan. And you absolutely startle me. Amazing. I'm going to move this just so you can be hovering right up there. Oh my god.

This is taking a minute? Yeah. You guys got this figured out? What do we do? I'm just going to push. I'm going to move this just so you can be hovering right up there. Oh my god. This is taking a minute. Yeah. You guys got this figured out? What do we do? I'm just going to push. I'm going to smash stuff. That's a good job for you. Yeah. What is he smashing? Everything except the brumestone.

Right, smash the brumestone. Which supposedly is in the four pillars, the four corners of the skydeck. So we have to find out where the mooring is and break that. Right, right. It should only really be in a couple of areas alongdeck. So we have to find out where the mooring is and break that. It should only really be in a couple of areas along this wall. It's only fastened to the wall.

All right. Start looking. Do we need to break the wall? Yeah. Yes, I would start with probably the middle and avoid the pillars. All right. All right. Yeah.

I'll start to investigate. I'll start looking along the edge of that wall. You said it looked like a facade, though, right? Or is it an actual wall? What are you talking about? The front of the building? Yeah. This door, if you look at it, it feels like you can tell the difference

between what a door that would open onto a space is. You're getting this weird sensation that that door will open up on a flat wall. Yeah, the physics don't work of there. It's got to be something holding its floating. I'm just going to investigate and try and look. I'll investigate. Yeah, yeah. We all should.

Everyone who wants to investigate, you'll need an investigation check. Oh, a natural one. Natural baby. Hey, guess what? Natural one. Oh my god! Natural one! No! Is that a one? That's a one! Yes, we're all

impossibly stupid. Deluxe. Okay, good. Where am I pointing at? Don't ask me, I can't find anything. What were you looking for? I was looking for the best place and way to avoid the brumestone and detach this from the wall. Cool. I mean, this whole thing

is attached to the wall there. Uh-huh. So. It's not like there's one tethering spot. No, that would be so fucking easy. Yeah. So absolutely not. Is it magic? So what we need is essentially

the way a blowtorch would arc through a metal wall, we need something to separate the whole wall. Yeah. So you know that it's attached flush here at the wall, and there was just a little bit of under-architecture that's running under the sides here that will allow for it to be supported from the bottom, too. This thing is just weirdly jutting out.

Tell everybody that. Do we need to get under it? We need to just find a precise way to almost cut it from the wall. Like, I really- My Eldritch Blast? How did we plan for this? Does anyone have a coin? I thought I had a plan and it went to shit. Yeah.

Okay. Magic, magic, what magic do we have? You had an idea. I just keep shaking the... The mace. The giant mace that was pushing people back and smashing into folks. I don't want to rob myself of the ability to smash something,

but some of the folks that can fly underneath want to give it a shot and try and hit it from the bottom. Maybe that could work. Oh, but you're such a good smith. All right, sure. There you go. And immediately, I'm slowly fluttering down. Wait, is that only one person can do that?

Because there's one mace, okay. One per 17. What's yours? Oh, 14. Okay, you're fine. Okay. Float down to the bottom and try to figure out how to generate force from underneath, but I'm just going to look up

and shrug and just take a big old swing right where the wall and the balcony meet underneath. Okay. As you go to swing, what was your family? Oh my gosh, I wanted to try to take the rope and swing down on it and rabbit stomp the architect, like the holes. You're trying to kick stone? Oh shit, I thought it was wood. You're trying to kick the hole

outside of a building, stone to death? I mean. How strong do your little bunny feet? Ooh, ooh. Have you ever kicked a building to death? Shoot for the moon, man, you know? Listen, listen. Look, this isn't drywall. Show your shot.

You willing to ruin your legs upon this wall? I'm not. You know what? You're right. You could if you want to. Nope, it's fine. I'm good. Maybe you get a natural 20. Who knows? Can I send my specter to do anything? Yeah, what do you want your specter to do? Well.

Do you have your specter stats pulled up? I do. Little dig? Let's see what he can do. If he doesn't have the clubby, you have the clubby. Correct. Now look at what his strength score is. I want you to really sit with that and pray on it.

Maybe not! No, we're not doing it! He has a one in strength. That's a negative five. He is a ghost. I'm very strong, but I just need to make sure there's nothing that I'd sing. You take a swing. Give me an attack roll.

I'm going to say this has a plus six. No, I'm going to say, I have the stats right here, it's a plus eight to hit. Plus eight. Mm-hmm. It's a big, mighty guy. He would have hurt you if he didn't get absolutely shitrex. 19 plus, you said eight?

Yeah. Yeah, 27. 27 just hits an immobile wall. Yeah, of course. Go ahead and give me 2d10 bludgeoning damage, please and thank you. Okay, 2d10. I never roll d10. Are you on the left side or the right side?

That's a 12. He's not listening to me, and that's disrespectful. You need a d10? What does a d10 look like? Oh my god, I'm losing my mind. It's the same thing as Percentage Dice, except with one digit. Okay, sure.

I've got lots of those, though. It's like a d8+. Yeah, two of them, plus two. Five and seven, 12. Okay. You do 12 points of damage to this understone and you begin knocking out, but it's sending cracks and splinters through it.

It doesn't look like it's doing anything, really. I mean, it's the first hit. You can get to work. It gets to smacking. Is that what you do? I'm going to fly up. It's working! Let's just all smash the shit out of it together. I love this plan.

I'm excited to be a part of it. I throw the hammer back to Dariax. All right. Let's go. I mean, I feel like my, I don't know if my stick is strong enough for that to be useful, so I'd have to grab something else. So I'm going to grab the heaviest thing that I can find.

Like if there's, I'd like, how heavy are those lions? You want to grab a whole? I want to grab something giant that I can smash with. Because my quarter-squad is not going to do that. Is it bronze, like 7,000 pounds or something? It is welded to the ground. That's not happening.

And half a ton. No, no, no, but like a, okay. But I love that you were like, I'm going to hit this with a lion. I want to hit things with things that are heavier than my staff. Yeah. I will say, for all intents and purposes, your staff is a powerful magical item

and I will not let you shatter it while doing this. Okay, fantastic. Then I'm going to start whacking at the corner, right at the corner, like a chisel. Can I get, I just want to float this by the group. Please do. Should I not use my Eldritch Blast? I have no strength and that's the only thing I can do

other than poke at it with my dagger. That's so exciting. My only concern about that, my only concernitch Blast, I have no strength, and that's the only thing I can do other than poke at it with my dagger. That's the only concern about that. My only concern about that is, what were you going to say? I mean, and what? If only we had another party out there that could bring something explosive.

If only! Me? What? It's Iris. Yeah! Iris. Iris. Some sort of plan we could have calculated earlier. Well, look. Who's got it? Who else has coins?

I have. You tried, and she was like, no. And from the front door, we literally hear He yells, actually, Cyrus yells two bits himself. Two bits! And busts through the door, joining you. Oh my god.

And he's got... This is on you! You didn't tell me the plan, so I don't know how to help. Did you bring the fantasy dynamite? Oh my god. They're laughing and crying. Did you bring the fantasy dynamite? Oh my god. They're laughing. Did you bring the TNT?

I cannot, I cannot. I absolutely did. And we get, it's not a flashback for the group, but Cyrus gets lost in a thousand yard stare. As we get just a wild group of misadventures of how he got down. Montage. Yeah, he got down into that market and he was like, I got to find something explosive.

But then this beautiful woman distracted him and he went on a whole noir adventure. Late into the night, he actually didn't get his long rest. He played cards until you fell asleep. And then he went on this beautiful adventure as this dame that was no good, but so beautiful led him out and around. He got turned.

He was polymorphed into a black bear in the secret fighting pit that's inside under the Westruun. It's what you were hearing. They all took random potions and would fight each other. Oh my god. And he's just covered in scars, bruised and beaten. Western, it's what you were hearing. They all took random potions and would fight each other. Oh my god. And he's just covered in scars, bruised and beaten,

and this woman says, Thank you for defending my honor. Here's the fantasy dynamite and a healing potion, and no one will know of our love. Animal sign of affection in this space. Yeah, yeah. And he just looks back at you. I bought it. I brought it.

Oh my god. The things I gave away in order to get it. He begins this dramatic monologue as he just grabs it out of his hand. I'm throwing one of each of these to everybody. I assume we have to light them on fire. There are people coming up here. Let's go fast.

Go, go, go, go, go! I light them all with my hands because I have produced flame. Reach to the blade. So here's what I'm going to do, so if we can while we're doing this, we don't want to just stick dynamite in the platform. Correct.

That we're trying to fly. In those corner things, right? Yeah. I'm going to go ahead and take my spear and hold it up to part of right where it meets the wall and use the mace to try and hammer really hard into it to try and create a little bit of a space that we can stick dynamite in.

To go ahead and hit the foundation of the wall as opposed to the platform we're on, just a little bit above it. It's a good thing you're so smart. And as Cyrus. I'm really good at breaking things! He's really good when it comes to figuring out breaking things.

He's smart on his time. You all immediately get to work doing this and Cyrus suddenly goes, Whoa, hold on, hold on, hold on! I had a thought. No. I know, it's a new one. His nose starts to bleed a little bit

as he thinks the hardest he's ever thought in his whole life. When we were on the airship, we had to see, with the brooms, you could see it. It was blue and glowing and I don't see it. Why can't, shouldn't we see it before you blow us all up? This is not a bad idea. They're in those corner things?

In every corner. Theoretically, they're in those corner things? In every corner. Theoretically, they're in those corner pillars? Yes, they should be in the corners. On this map, it looks like there's a lid of stone. Yeah. You're seeing a little thing here. Like a little lid. Dorian's hovering over one, and you're two lines in the corners.

I want to get in there and just try to hammer to open up one of the lids. Okay, give me attack roll. And Cyrus goes through and uses his wind power to put out everyone's fantasy dynamite. 19, yeah. Just hold for a second. Yeah, hold! Sorry I got ahead of myself.

No worries. Where are you going for first? I'll go for that far one that Dorian's not standing on. Over here? Yeah, you go and break it. I'm just going to set you there for a second. As you go and smash it, and it crumbles away. Yeah.

Ooh, ooh, ooh. Okay. Yay! And it closes. Brimstone. It's still in the pillar a little bit, but it's exposed, and the moment it's exposed, it starts to glow a little brighter. Great. So do we have to activate it in any way,

you know, from the airship? I was riding it, not flying it! Cyrus, do you remember anything from the airship? Look. I mean, it's keeping it floating right now. Yeah, I was just saying. No way, it's activated. You just gotta.

Also, I'm sorry, I want more to shut the door again, because Cyrus bashed it open. Yeah, good call. Yeah, for sure. You go and shut it, and you look through the door. Unless you don't look through the door as you're closing it. You do, and you see that there are scuffles and tussles and fights in the hallway,

and you make eye contact with someone who sees you as you slam the door shut, and you can hear the sounds before it becomes sound tight again of people rushing towards the deck. We have to go, we have to go, we have to put the dynamite in. The dynamite's all situated there. I go, all right, everyone,

let's go get behind one of the tables. Okay, I'll go. Is it going to work with just one exposed? Do we need to reveal the rest of them? No, no, no, no, no, they're working, they're working. We just have to trust that they're working. Trust? They are. There's no way that the structure would be so hard.

I do not trust this! Okay. Smack the other one. The one over here? Mm-hmm. 14 plus nine, I'm burning plus eight, 22. Yep. While this is happening, I go ahead and do a quick run past the wall

and cast Burning Hands to just ignite all the different fuses. This is happening, isn't it? Let's go! We back up, we back up! I fly up in the air and I let out a super loud whistle. I hope this is right. I'm going to aim it at one of the lions and cast Shatter. Oh! Amazing! Four points, right? I don't know.

Wait, so we're just destroying the lions? Okay, I'm going to cast Eldritch Blast on one of them then. Oh, you do trust me. You do trust me. Incredible, both of you make your attack rolls. I hope we don't fall to our deaths. 17. Nine.

17. You see it bounce off the weird curvature. You have multiple attacks. I get two. Yeah. Okay. So, and I'm aiming it at the base? Which one are you? Are you going for the one right behind you? Oh, the one he's not aiming at.

Someone's got to give me an answer then. Whoa, whoa, whoa. So the one that I'm, I suppose the one that I'm closest to. I'm yelling, I'm so sorry. Hey, it's fine. The one that I'm closest to! I can't hear anything in this ear anymore. Okay, shit.

Oh, that's a fucking 26. Amazing, yeah, you blast it and you're aiming your shatter at this one? Yeah. Cool, perfect. What's your damage? 20 total. 20 total. That'll do it. Yeah, for the sake of what we're doing

and we don't need this to last a super long time, you expose the brumestone under the copper. Why? What's your? 26. Yeah, what's your damage? Oh, fuck me. I'm so sorry. What's your damage? I'm so sorry. Girl, what's your damage?

Oh, just here I am. Aw, jeez. Come on. Here it goes. I loved hearing it. I know. 10! Okay, 10 points of damage is going to dent in the metal, but not fully expose the brumestone.

Okay. I suppose I could do it again. But I do need all of you to roll initiative, as you've now done enough. You've done enough big, loud noises. Wait, no, I planned for this. Oh! This is so stupid. I'm going to take my fucking seat. Let's go!

It's not that good of a plan. Hey, hold on. Here's what I need. Amy, Amy, I need you to look me in the eye. Take a deep breath. Make this the perfect plan. It better be. Because I love you, and I like you,

and unless you are airtight in this, I'm going to fuck you over. Okay, great. Okay, well, here's your first chance to fuck me up. I'm so terrified. So terrified. Ready? I love it. Okay, so can I, yesterday, or no, not yesterday, this morning, actually, I got my Pearl of Power to get an extra spell slot.

Okay. And with that extra spell slot, I had this idea that someone might hear us on the deck. And so I have decided to preemptively cast Major Image so that it looks, right in front, so that it looks like the entire deck has collapsed. Oh. Oh my god. Oh my god.

This was supposed to be an encounter. Oh shit. I have bad guys and a whole fight. We're going to allay this to a single die roll. I know what I said, presuming success. You're going to get this off, but the timing has to be immaculate, Opal. So you guys are damaging and shattering

and trying to expose that last lion. You need to time this illusion so it looks like it's falling away as you detach and go. So here's what's going to happen. I need one more roll from everyone but Opal to do, I just need you to do as much damage as you can do in one hit to get yourselves off the wall.

And then following that, a performance check to time this as people look out on the damaged, ruined side of this casino and see what you need them to see instead of what's actually there. 20. 20. Amazing. Doing what?

Attacking, attacking the line. Attacking with your, perfect. Taking out all my anger about the situation with the eddakai because it's not worth it. I love it. Roll your damage. 19 to hit? Absolutely. Is it with the mace?

Yeah, okay. So it's 2d8. Give me that 2d10. 8. 2d10. Okay. 25 to hit. Yep, absolutely. So it's 2d8. Give me that 2d10. 8. 2d10. Okay. About 25 to hit. Yep, absolutely. But with my rapier, my die, like. Your bunny feet.

My little bunny feet. So I'm going to take this for seven damage. Perfect. I'll do... Oh no! I'll do, oh no! I'll do my Chromatic Orb. Nice. And plus six, I don't know what to roll.

What do I roll for that? Just anything? No. What? Take that back. Continue, continue. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It has a hit, it's not a save. So I just roll an attack plus six. 100%. Ha ha. And I didn't forget about the fantasy dynamite.

You're just all getting one more big hit in before these go off. I will say, the fuses are a little longer than I expected. So it's taking some time. I got this, though. Got it. Oh god. 19. Yeah, 19 damage?

Yeah, oh no. No, it's 3d. 19 to hit is, it hits. 19 to hit, okay. Seven, six, 13, seven, 20 damage. Okay. Darius, what are you doing with these extra long fuses?

So as they finish hitting stuff, I'm like, ah shit, the fuses are taking too long. Oh god. Hey, everyone, stand on the other side! Stand on the other side! Then start getting everyone to shift off towards the far end of the wall and see them all, the four pieces set up

in the wall, opposite points there, about maybe 10 feet from each other, where I had set them in the wall, all four of them. I go, all right, hold on to something. I'm going to cast Fireball right in the center of them, which is a 20-foot radius, is going to ignite all of them at once. God. Incredible.

I'm losing my hat. The hat is gone! She lost her hat. Roll your damage. Roll that Fireball damage. Hold on. Opal, this is great, and it's going great. You're rolling damage for your last hit, too, right? Huh? Because you hit, but you haven't rolled damage yet.

Oh. Yeah, she doesn't do a last hit. She's timing this major damage. That's right, never mind. Okay. 26 points of fire damage. So that on top of the series of how much fantasy dynamite did Cyrus get? One for everybody. Cool. Five rounds of fantasy dynamite

all go off, and you guys tenderize the wall by putting these big, dancing cracks into it. The fireball. That's also a bar, right? There's a bunch of alcohol there. Oh shit. Yeah. Yeah, so it's extra sweet. A lot of fantasy vodka. There's so much fantasy vodka. And we're all over there by that far lion, by the way,

because we've all been hitting that guy. I don't have to move you. It's totally fine. We know what we're doing here. We only needed this if it was going to be the fight that I thought it was going to be. But it amped. It might be. I don't know, I'm a rolling bad. But here's what happens. You shatter the wall.

The dynamite goes off and severs that bottom rickety stonework that's holding it up. You all crack and begin to fall away. Three of the points were exposed. One of them isn't, so everything's a little heavy and you list to the side, everyone sliding towards the lion and floating off and away

as that momentum begins to carry you down and away off of the wall. Opal, you have two problems in front of you. One, the lion isn't shattered, but two, you have to get this major of you. One, the lion isn't shattered, but two, you have to get this major image up. As the wall crumbles away, you see scores of, they don't wear a uniform,

but by the very plainness of them, their blood-spattered nature, and how calm and serene they seem about all of this. Those are nameless ones and they're staring. You, five, six, because Cyrus is there, down. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Need you to make a performance check for me. Please, please, please. Is there anything?

Oh! Can we get one less attack? Is this for anything or am I supposed to? Before we look, is there anything anyone wanted to do to help bolster her attack? Can we support her? Can we sing Bardic the Infant? Can I use a reaction?

Can we sing to her and tell her to do things? Yeah, what do you want to do with your reaction? I want to add five to my attack roll. Can I do that? You know what? I'll allow it. No, you don't have to. No, it's fine.

Okay, wait, that still probably doesn't get me shit. You did it rolling in the thing, rolling in your box. Okay, fine. You can get that die back. It's just a little rogue die. I fucking hate this dice. Okay. Okay, here we go.

This is my special opal dice with spiders in it. Fuck me over. Oh! it. Fuck me over. Oh! Oh, fuck me over. Okay, so wait. What she needs to do, she's got to put the image up. Yeah, I got to put the image up. This is a performance check

to get the timing of this right. But I can add the five or no? Say what you're going to say. I want to help her by maintaining, I feel like because we're listing, it's going to put us out of the view of her thing. I want to give her by maintaining, I feel like because we're listing, it's going to put us out of the view of her thing. I want to give her another chance. So I'm going to look at my brother

and I'm going to grab his hand and we're going to run toward the edge. And as we're running, I'm going to pull my new mandolin out, give it a little strum, and I'm going to cast Fly on him. Okay. We'll both go up and over the edge and under, and we'll try to catch that bottom right area and just push it up to keep us in place

just long enough to maintain so that she's got another chance to put that one square over the other so we're not moving anymore. We're trying. I love this. Give me an athletics check. Cyrus will do the same.

Mm-hmm. Cocked die. Okay, he got a 14. He's doing his best. Athletics, not great for me. Well, 16. Oh yeah. Yeah. You're pushing, he's pushing.

It's hard to have purchase when you're in the air. Everything levels out just a little bit. Give me one more attempt. One more attempt. Hey, roll good. I'm trying! Please roll good! Please roll good!

You got it, baby, you got it. Oh my god. I believe in you. Yeah, you've done so many things. I did it, but I said, please roll good! Here, use my four if you need it. It's not a d4, it's a d8! What is it? What, an eight now?

Fuck, use that one! Okay, so what do I do? I roll the d20, then add my five and add my perception. That seems like a lot. We need this to work! Yes! Okay. Add the eight. Add the eight.

Okay, wait. So that's plus! Okay. Add the eight. Add the eight. Okay, wait. So that's, okay, yeah. Plus? Plus, so, plus four. So that's 23. 23. 23. Describe for me the major image you put in place as people are staring out at this rubble and as the dust clears,

something new flickers into life in their vision. Just a half a beat off, but who could know in the chaos of what's going on? What does it look like? So what I would like, and I don't know if this can work, but what I would like to, because she's doing a lot right now. What I would like to do is I would like them to see it crumble, crack, or the weight of it tip, like there's been an explosion,

and everybody fall to their death. Then there's fire, obviously, because of the booze and because of the dynamite. Before that happens, would it be possible, in my major image, to use Disguise Self? Can I do that in my major image to use Disguise Self. Can I do that in my major image? Can I do that? Probably not, but let's just say. Why would I say no to you? Why would you say no?

It's fine. I'm going to Disguise Self as fucking Poska so they can see their sweet fucking leader just fall to her death and just break their hearts on top of all of it. You're so incredible. Incredible! They see you all crumbling. I'll do you one better.

It's not just Poska. It's Poska standing triumphant over your group's corpses. She was victorious, but sacrificed herself as it all crumbles and falls away. And they run up to the edge, but you've detached and floated away from the wall. So they're just looking down at the major image that they think is it crumbling into ruin

dozens of feet below you as you all set off to the side. You guys are still pushing up, but it's still listing a little bit. You need to take care. I'm going to run over to that third guy. Bless on all of us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's attack the lion.

Now please, I have to remind you that a major image just happened and you're going to be creating a bunch of sound. Anything you got for that? You're just letting it ride. Sound, sound. You're too busy, so you can't do that deafening thing. I'm living in the building!

Actually, I got it, I got it. Go here, I'm going to hand one of you the mace. I got it. And be like, all right, time it. Tell me when you're going to go. Okay, oh my god, I'm so excited. Okay, three, two, one. I cast Thaumaturgy on the far top

of part of the building to have another small explosion rumble sound draw their attention. Yes! Oh my god, yes. Give me an attack roll and a performance check. Hell yeah, I'm so good at this. Okay, 14 attack. Oh my god. 20, I am. Hey!

A dirty 20. Amazing! Look, a dirty 20 is still a 20, baby. And eight plus five, 13. To hit? No, no, 13 damage. Oh yeah. It's one strike. That is enough. Okay.

I can't believe it. Your hit and Opal's. I just can't believe it. Earlier's. I'll just blast. No. Believe. It's because you did believe. It's because you believed. We were here all along.

You don't come there. Thank you did believe. It's because you believed. We were here all along! You come there. You now are drifting probably 20 feet away from the wall of the casino. People are looking down and murmuring. The fight breaks back out. They hear the sound of more explosions and people are running back inside to go join the fray in other parts of the building.

Since I'm right there, having exposed the brimstone, I'm just going to squat down and be like, come back, but not loud. Yeah. Just quietly. Perfect. Cyrus looks at you. Did we do it? Come back?

Are we dead? We don't want to go? No, we want to go. Let's push this off. Okay, wait, so I'll cast Fly on myself because we need a propeller. Do you have Fly? I do. Whoa.

Sure. Is that too much? No, come fly! Can we use a propeller? Let's all be, we will become propellers. I don't understand what's happening. Big hot fantasy! Everyone turn into a simple machine! I have to say it. Cyrus is pushing on the side with you,

and with Opal, you cast Falling Yourself to come join. Correct? Wait, do I need any strength for this? No, don't worry about it. Okay. Because I'll just cast it on fear of arrive. You could just putt-putt push. Great. It's fine. I'll just hang out. You're back there.

Cyrus is going to interpose himself between you and Dorian, and he's going to spend this entire time pushing, absolutely macking on you. Great. You know what? You had your shot yesterday. Not now. What do you mean not? I was flirting with you.

I told you to take your shirt off. And I did it. You did? I'll fly to the other side. You got equal thrust of some sort. I'm not trying to pacify you. I'm going to be running from side to side using my pull to steer. If we come close to something,

it'll just push us off. Quick, more. We got to help them, too. Then go over to the edge where they are and. Yeah! I think it would work for me. It's weightless, right? It's working a little bit. Yeah, yeah.

It's not nothing. Do this! Don't do it! Just pull out your hands! Your hands are not the same. I can't do it. Can't you make it think more? Cyrus is pushing the whole thing!

Oh, I know, I thought you could blow. Cyrus is pushing, but he's also doggy kicking. Like, ah! This is helping, I think. Yeah, yeah, yeah. While continuing to flirt with Opal. And you guys do it. You, say, fly off into the sunset.

We did it! You literally fly off into the sunset! We did it, poodle! We did it, poodle! We did it, poodle! We did it, poodle! I was actually looking forward to facing off with some of these faceless ones.

They're nameless. They would have faced us after we were done with them. They would have been. I still had more lieutenants. I know, so this is- Give me a perception check as you move at half the speed of smell into the distance. Yeah, well, that's the other thing is like.

Like a fart has caught up with y'all and is overtaking you. I just love the image. I am. 14 plus, what is it? What was it, perception? Perception. 18. The most arduous heist escape that's ever happened.

Truly. Elevator music, girl from Ipanema starts playing. We're free! from the balcony, you actually look out across at the Maiden's Wish Casino, devastated, under fire, full of pitched, bloody battle. Your eyes glance off to the penthouse and the balcony, where you see your sister, and your sister sees you, and she just watches.

She was never deceived by the major image. She is waiting, and when you finally lock eyes with her, you can see just the whites of her teeth as she grins menacingly at you, saying nothing, just staring, and knowing that her time, your time, is still coming. She is patient,

and she is delighted. Do you do or say anything? I mean, she's far away, and we're going very, very slowly. Yeah. The longest time. Like a pigeon, slowly. It's our normal movement speed.

It's at least 30 feet every six seconds. Hoo-ha! I don't know. But as I see her, my hair flares a little bit more, my tattoos start to flare up a little bit more, and I pull out the tiger's eye, and I just hold it in my hand like this and close it. She folds her arms.

She's not wearing any weapon you can see. And I don't know what you knew about her from before, before you began searching, but she looks at your hand as it closes. And you see her neck shift a little bit, like she was cracking her neck, but you hear it like it's right next to you as the tiger's eye in your hand shatters in half. She gives you a little nod

and turns and walks back inside the penthouse. So you did it, against all odds, in defiance of truly logic Logic! and understanding. I want to end with more. In this moment, what are you thinking about?

What are you feeling? This group of absolute numbskulls has just helped you pull off the biggest heist that Tal'Dorei's ever seen. Also the slowest. It's both those things. Slow poof. World's slowest victory lap as you drift.

I look out, because I can see over Khimel, right? Yeah. And past Khimel. Yeah. There are mountains, I'm assuming. There's the Iron Seat Ridge to the northwest. There are a bunch of flats and some river waterways way off

in the distance and a little wooded area to the southwest. She's never... I'm assuming we're up pretty high, yeah? Yeah. I look out and I've... I've never been up so high before. I've never seen it.

I've seen the mountains, but I've never seen them like this. And it just reminds me that there's so much more out there for me to see. I think she's just quiet. As you take it all in, your mind drifts back to your point of entry from the Feywild,

to that incredibly kind, incredibly old woman that sent you on her way, on your way, with only her name on your lips, Morrigan. And you saw in that moment as she pushed you through the promise in her smile that you would see more, that you will look down on a world and change it. And that it was just for you to do,

good or bad, just do. And then you came here, and here you are now. And our last thought, as you look out into the sunset, because truly time is, you've spent a whole day just drifting up here. A single raven lands on the brumestone that you're standing beside

and looks at you and calmly regards you, unblinking, uncanny, but with you in the silence unblinking, uncanny, but with you in the silence as something great and terrible approves of what you've done today. And that's where we're going to end our two-part adventure. It's the three!

Yay! Exandria, look at the time wall! Guys, what a poodle! Who needs a balcony? What's a poodle? That's a poodle. Now that's what I call a poodle. Dude.

Volume two. Hell yeah. That is mine. Holy crap. Oh my goodness. Okay. Oh my goodness. You are magic. No, you! That was really fun. No, you. So funny.. You are magic. No, you!

That was really fun. No, you! So mean of storytelling. Thanks for coming back and telling some more stories. This is so fun. Let's do it again. We got 50k and a floating balcony! Come on!

Yeah! Yeah! This guy's the limit! Literally. It's a little slow. We'll work on it. It's a little slow. You have time.

We have time. Someone's going to figure out a propulsion system. There's no bathroom up here, and that's just the most important thing. We pee on the side where people are pushing. Did you forget that their relationship started with peeing off a wall? Yeah!

We have walls. They can pee on walls. Some people got skyships. We got a sky bar up here. Yay! You blew up all the alcohol! Cheers! Unforged, unforged.

If I actually even have to land this bitch, how is the question? It's a very quick question. Very slowly. We're going to knock off the broomstick. Oh my gosh, Broomstone's also worth so much money, right? We're rich. Woo! It's a hard fence. Oh, is it?

Oh, yeah. It's a very controlled substance. Can you touch Burmestone? Yeah, you can touch it. It's just there. Well, I don't know. Is that true? Am I just lying? Am I telling lies?

Cool. Yeah. I don't know. Amazing. All right. I do just want to say thank you so much. This is always an honor and a joy to get to play and tell stories with you. Thank you for joining me on this crazy,

quick adventure with weird mechanics and new and old faces. And I'm not going to cry this time because I don't want to. But thank you so much. Thank you so much for joining us. Aw, thank you! You're incredible.

You're so big and strong. You're so big! You're the biggest bunny I've ever seen. So big! Amazing. So thank you all out there for enjoying our, well, I hope you enjoyed it, joining us for our story.

And until we all meet again, love you, be safe, be good, and is it Thursday yet? Wait, it's Friday. Oh no, cut the feed. This is Matthew Mercer. Thank you for listening

to Exandria Unlimited on the Critical Role Podcast Network. If you've enjoyed the show, please leave us a review on the podcast app of your choice. Your review might inspire someone to give this adventure a listen. There are unlimited stories to be told, and we can't wait to keep telling them. Is it Thursday yet?