Critical Role - Liam’s One-Shot: The Song of the Lorelei

Episode Date: August 31, 2018

Join Dungeon Master Liam O'Brien as he takes his guests through a werewolf adventure in Wildemount! The Lorelei siblings return home to discover their castle ransacked, their staff murdered, and their father missing... (With Laura Bailey, Erica Luttrell, Sam Riegel, TJ Storm, and Travis Willingham)

Once upon a time, a group of curious storytellers breathed life into epic tales set in the wide fantasy world of Exandria. This is Liam O'Brien, here to welcome you to Critical Role. We'll dive into the story in just a moment, but first, a few notes. This is the audio-only version of our broadcast that streams Thursdays at 7pm Pacificm. Pacific over on twitch.tv slash criticalroll and youtube.com slash criticalroll. If you subscribe to our Twitch channel, you can watch the video on demand immediately after the broadcast.

And it's also available Mondays at 12 p.m. Pacific on YouTube. And of course, for all you wonderful podcast listeners, freshly minted episodes release right here on the Critical Role Podcast Network one week after our broadcast on Thursdays. With all that said, let's get into the story. Hello! That's all I wanted. Welcome to Critical Role, Laura. Welcome. Hey! Guys, thank you for coming to our annual

Burning Man placeholder episode and my werewolf extravaganza. I'm so excited to have new players with us tonight, though. We have, I don't know if the cameras can see them, Erika Luttrell is here. TJ Storm is here. These three fools that I'm bored with? Fun fact, too, you've been DMing for

how many decades did you say? Three. Three decades. So when I inevitably forget rules, I will either ask TJ what he thinks or pull out of my ass, because I don't care. Very excited to dig into this. But first, we have announcements.

That's how we do this, right? Yes, yes. First off, just announced today, we are doing a live show in NYC, New York City. Live show. Live show. On Broadway. Your town, my town. Join us at the United Palace in Washington Heights

on Thursday, October 4th. Tickets will be on sale at 12 p.m. Eastern via Ticketmaster. Check out the details at critrole.com. Our first episode of Hamburger Helper, which, that's the name, which teaches you the basics of using dice is live now at youtube.com slash criticalrole. Please don't sue us. Please, please don't.

Ooh, Danny Carr is sneaking in like a rogue. Laura has the wrong iPad. I mean, don't get me wrong, it's really great, because I've got- Tablet device. Tablet device. I've got Matt's tablet device. Okay. Ooh, can you find out how our characters- I know how I can find out how much is done.

I probably shouldn't. I mean, it's got all these characters, like his NPCs. It wasn't passcode? Shut that down, shut that down. There was no passcode? I don't think so. Why don't we just make this two hours of us going through Matatabi.

Cleaning the cookie jar. We should also talk about Pavlov. Yes, we should. Everybody, as many of you already know, obviously, a few days ago we launched a charity campaign with Blair Herder and the Pavlov Foundation, which is devoted to ending childhood cancer. We're specifically trying to raise money for a 600-mile bike ride that Blair and his brother are riding from San Francisco to

LA. We had all these lofty goals for raising money for this ride. We said that if we hit $20,000, that I would run a one-shot past it. We said if we hit $50,000 of money raised for this amazing charity from you, the Critters, that we would be able to fully fund a research grant to try and end cancer. We hit it. You guys are incredible. $50,000 raised for this campaign. It's incredible. So incredible that we're scrambling to add other stretch goals. We just got one in. It's hot off the presses. If we hit $100,000, which is crazy, but also possible, we will be able to fund the Shudderbugs Summer Camp, an entire summer camp where they teach photography to kids fighting cancer. You could make kids' summer camp dreams come true with your donations. There'll be more information in the stream or whatever, down

here, up here, all around. Social medias. So click, donate, be awesome, and thank you so much for all your generosity so far. It's really making a difference, and you guys are incredible. We've got to get it out. That's so good. There's some kind of shenanigans with Laura going on over there, so I guess let's talk merch announcements. We have got, in the store right now, hey, hey, hey, hey. We're in the store right now, we've got crazy things.

Oh my god. We've got all the stuff that was available, hold on, because here's the thing. So Matt had logged into my iPad. I don't remember my password. What? So I'm just trying to figure out, because my character sheet is on here.

It's dicegirl6969. That's what it was, thank you. Anywho, we've got all the stuff from Gen Con available in the store right now. Wait, the stuff from Gen Con that was previously unavailable? In the store? Yeah. So we've got the map. Wildemount. What's that map? Wildemount map by Devin Rue, who it's amazing, and the map is amazing. You guys should check it out. We've got our pins. We've got our Mighty Nein pin and our Vox Machina pin. Enamel pins,

they're so cool. We've got a dice set that's a Wildemount dice set. It's navy blue. We picked out the colors ourselves. I'm telling you, Mothma's right now. I want to say, the monogram design was from Crystal Sharp. Okay. We also have a Yasha mini bust that's this big by Steamforged. It's really, really cool. It's metal, it's heavy, it looks really awesome, and it comes in a really cool little box. Do we have all our regular stuff, too? All the stuff that was there before is there now, too, and we have more hats coming,

because I know you guys like them. The dad hats? Yeah, the dad hats. They're really cool. They are really cool. Why, if you are so cute, you better get rid of that shit by the time it's time to tear some people up. Werewolves, okay, I'm going to sign in. Yep. Is there anything else?

Is there anything else that I'm forgetting to do? You know why TJ is my favorite guest we've ever had? He brought us red vines. He did, I know. Or nondescript third party red licorice candies. Sure. That's what I meant. Grasping vines, grasping vines. Thank you for the grasping vines. We already have a live show in New York. I know, it's crazy. Our first one ever. Sorry, we already said that.

Oh man. Seriously? Tickets are on sale, or will be. Yeah, it's going to be great. We like D&D here. That having been said, I think we should take a break so we can come back from the break so we can play some motherfucking werewolves. So let's go to break so that we can then dive into

A Critical Role. Nettopp សូវាប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានប់បានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបា That's fun. I don't know why Matt complains. Welcome back. It is just about time to dive into the song of the Lorelai. Did you do it? Well, no. I'm getting an email to tell me where my password is. Okay, so I don't want anyone to think that Laura is a really bad D&D player, even though she is. Matt, for some reason, maybe an act of sabotage before he left for the desert, signed into Laura's iPad, and now Laura can't get into her iPad to get at her tablet. The real problem is that she never remembers her frickin' passwords, okay? You guys, it's all coming together. Here's the good news. You work on that, because to begin this game, it is story time.

Oh, I get to use all of Matt's toys. Where does he get these wonderful toys? Did it do it? Yeah, it did it. On the edges of the Siren Green Forest, not too terribly far from the city of Diastok, on the continent of Wildemount, stands Lorelai Castle, home for many generations to the Lorelai family.

The Lorelai bloodline stretches back almost three centuries, but only rose to prominence during the war between the Dwendalian Empire, which we now reside within, and the Julis Dominion, which once ruled the southern half of the Marrow Valley in the preceding age. The Lorelais proved their worth in that conflict and were gifted for their service with a stretch of land that you five siblings were born and raised on. I see the resemblance.

Yeah. It was also during the bloody struggles of that long past war that the bloodline would be changed forever. During a near fatal encounter, your ancestor, Alphar Lorelei, was bitten near the end days of the war. The curse of lycanthropy burned its way into the blood of Alphar in a relentless fever that nearly drove him mad.

But he did not bend to it. He persisted. As did his daughter. And her sons. And so on. The family's secret has been closely guarded over the centuries, and in its earliest days, the curse was seen as just that, a curse. But with time came acceptance and the responsibility of power. Once of age, Lorelai youths eventually undergo the taming of their wilder nature and their animalistic blood, and it has largely been responsible for the family's ascension over

many a generation. Some have faltered. There have certainly been dark periods in the Lorelai history, individuals who let their baser impulses rule them, but the family always returned to the right and the good. Aura. Aura. Yes. Lucius.

Lucius. Lucius or Lucius? Lucius. Lucius. Portia. Hello. And the twins, Benicio and Lawrence. Bro.

What's up, brother? You know a little of this struggle yourselves. At least you hear tell from your father. I love this game. So much. At least you hear a tell from your father and your great aunt, Katarine. Your father, Haldor Lorelai, never knew his own mother,

Genevieve Lorelai, but by his aunt Katarine's accounts, she was unbridled and wild, spurned the taming, embraced the animal within more than the family would have liked. It led to her doom, they would say. It was that very nature that drew her into a whirlwind romance with a man the family did not approve of.

Halder, or Hal, was born out of wedlock and never knew his mother. She was murdered not far from the castle grounds and found in a woven heap. Hal was born out of wedlock and never knew his mother. She was murdered not far from the castle grounds and found in a woven heap. Her father was dead or fled or possibly killed, Jean-Bieve, the family theorized anyway. Jesus Christ.

The only mother Hal knew was Aunt Katarine, who loved her sister's son with all her heart, raised him well, led him through the taming, made him the kind and just nobleman he is today. Sadly, history repeats and repeats, and Katarine is mostly the only mother you five have known either. When your mother, Rosalind, died during the birth of the twins, old though she was, Katarine dutifully continued her role as the family matriarch. Ora, you as the oldest, and you, Lucius, two years Ora's junior, you both remember Rosalind some, but for all of you, it has been old Aunt Cat who sat by your beds as children, who taught you your letters,

and how Haldor and Katarine love you. You've grown into your adulthood with grace and strength and absorbed the lessons of your forebears to an extent. Aura, you were meant to rule this house after your father is someday gone, but like your grandmother, Genevieve, and others with that wilder streak in the family's history,

you have eschewed the taming. In fact, much to your father's heartache, you have chosen instead to wander the wilds, forsaking civilized nobility entirely. He loves you, and you love him, but it's been complicated. Lucius, in a similar vein, you too have chosen a path outside the Lorelei's elder traditions. You were but a child when you heard the voice of the Moonweaver whispering to you by the light of the full moon.

You soon began praying to her nightly. And when you were old enough to make up your own mind, you followed her voice to the temple and found your second family. It was really Portia, accomplished and driven Portia who first fit the mold of the Lorelei noble. You excelled at everything. Demanded to undergo the taming two years early, and while you love your older siblings dearly,

you know that if they have no desire to rule, you will gladly assume that seat of power. Then there are the twins. Our two burly, hulking twins. Larry. Studious and serious-minded Larry, Lawrence, really, you underwent the taming as was expected, and you are prepared to offer what the family requires, but your true love is logic. Indeed. Reason.

And the study of this curse that runs through your family's blood, perhaps it can be better understood and better used for the good of House Lorelei. If anyone can do so, it is you. Then, there is you, Benicio. Yeah. Slightly taller than your twin brother, with none of the useless fixation on books,

you couldn't wait to undergo the taming. You had an itch for danger from an early age and were impatient to enter your adult life and flex. Fuck yeah. Your power. It was this love of trouble, actually, that led you to burning your arms so badly all those years ago, all in an attempt to prank your twin

by sabotaging one of his explorations of alchemy. Lesson somewhat learned. Fire bad. Two weeks ago, each of you received identical letters from your father, Haldor, summoning you home to Castle Lorelei. Intimated in those letters is his wish to discuss the family's future and the handing down of power within the family.

You all have been spread to the winds the last six months the family's future and the handing down of power within the family. You all have been spread to the winds the last six months to a year, maybe, following the individual threads that life has laid before you. Now Hal is eager to see his children all around him again. And as yet another token of his love, he has provided you all with three days and nights of rest,

recuperation, and general pampering together at one of the finest inns in Diastok, the Shaded Bough. It is here that we begin this current verse in the Song of the Lorelei. You are gathered in the sumptuous dining room of the Shaded Bough. Your breakfast is finished.

Your bags are packed. B-O-U-G-H. Bough. Bough. Your horses have been prepped for your departure, and it is raining. I need to hear that shit. Yes, all right. Where is it?

Where is it, Matthew? Drop me in. Drop me in. Drop me in. Drop a beat. Oh. Should we shake the book and pull out our own? I'll warn people. The morning is yours.

It is about a day's journey home to Castle Lorelei. You have a way you go. We have a shortcut that go, you have a shortcut that'll get you there before sun is down. But it does not look as much fun as you expected it to be with the heavy rain. I'll be inside. Yeah, you're just finished your breakfast

in a very fancy dining hall. And have we seen each other in a while, all together? You spent the last three days getting facials, steaming, catching up. Okay. After all, brother and sister didn't need to have their fleas removed from so much time outside. Good work, bro.

Thanks. Truly. Sorry. Where, you've been gone so long. I have. I would, bro. Thanks. Truly. Sorry. You've been gone so long. I have. Do you feel like you're better than us now? I just feel I'm aware of things other than you are. So yeah, I think you're better than us.

You can put it however you'd like, brother. We'll see about that. I would like to thank whatever video game company screamed you hoarse. Yeah. She sounded ragged and sexy as F. This is my normal voice. I do a voice for the other 130 episodes that we've done.

Well, if there's any business you want to see to, you certainly can, but we could also just hit the road. Would anyone like to step out into the rains? The path will be covered with mud. Doesn't that make it better? Does it? Does it? I remember why I stayed away. I have no objections to getting started, I suppose.

The sooner the better, right, brother? Of course. Let us begin. Yes. So, hood's up into the rain. You leave the Shaded Bough, mount up, and ride out of the larger city of Diastok. It's slow going.

The visibility is low. The rain is pouring in sheets. But you are taking the same path you always have when traveling between Diastok and your home. The quickest route there is following the main road for three or four hours, and there's a particular field that you're all familiar with, which if you cut across, there is a stream there, a small river,

Whispurn River, which you cut over and you can get home just by the end of day. If that's the way you want to take, or you could take the long way, which I don't know why you would. Well, the stream will be flooded with all this rain. I say we take the long way. All right.

Before we have you left, I spoke with the small folk. I want to know what is going on in the nearby lands. Is there any trouble? There is a great deal of trouble. Not in these parts. We're more towards the east in Wildemount, but to the west there is mountain confrontation with the country of Xhorhas. All the military forces have been sent in that direction, and rumors, hey man, I don't know what Matt's planning, so let's keep it vague, shall we? But word has gotten back to you, not generally known, but to you, Lucius, that it's not been

going well on the front. And in this land, no bandits or anything? No, there is definitely hiring of, there's a criminal element in Diastok, and you do keep tabs on it, but nothing, no bump, certainly, that would alarm you. We proceed on the long road. Thank you, brother. Okay. So Portia wisely avoids the Whispering River,

anticipating possible flooding. So it's going to be a long journey. It will take the better part of the day. You might not make it by sundown this time. And in fact, in the interest of time, we'll say that you ride all day in the wane. In the wane. In the wane. On my way. Riding in the wane.

Werewolves in the wane. In the wane. See, we're very serious here. You spend most of the day riding in getting sopping wet and miserable, and you are looking forward very much to seeing all the familiar faces who work in the castle. The cooks, the people in the stable.

All the familiar faces, and catching up with your father. You maybe are a little anxious about seeing him for the first time in a while, but still. But still. The sun does eventually set, and you ride for a bit in the dark.

You do have in your belongings some hooded lanterns, which is lucky because that's the only thing that would stay lit in weather like this. Castle Lorelei is built on a tall hill, a ways from the road, on the edge of the certain green forest. So you've spent a lot of your youth poking into those woods and getting into trouble, you especially.

And nostalgia always hits when you return. But something is off this time, returning home at night, which you've done before, this is not the first, but coming around a bend about a mile away from Lorelei Castle, you're used to seeing lights twinkling on the horizon, from fires and torches in various places in the castle,

but you don't see any of that today. It is pouring rain. It is very dark out, and you are a little bumped a mile out from home. Why isn't the castle lit up? Maybe they're trying to conserve torchlight or something? Don't be an idiot, that's not a real thing.

Torches are expensive. They're not expensive. I, too, am concerned. I sense wariness among the woodland creatures. What? Okay. Any time Father knows we're coming, he makes the castle ready.

This is strange. Ooh! Is it a surprise party? Lucy, it's close to your birthday, isn't it? Lucy, only you notice, as you draw even a little bit nearer, that the gates to the castle are open as well. The gates are open. This is not normal. Father's fastidious about the gates, the house,

and especially if we were coming, everything would be lit. I agree, cause for concern. I think we should enter the castle warily, off of the horses. You guys are a bunch of namby-pambys. You want to ride in there, Benny? Well, I mean, I'm not going to, it's dark.

I will produce a flame. Oh. All right, then, I'll... You're doing it! You're doing it! You're doing it, Peter! Oh my god, there's a flame in your hand right now! You want to come in the front way with me?

Of course. What, and the castle's overrun, you're just going to get attacked? Do you think there's not a good reason all the flames are out? Caution may be the wiser choice here, but. Fine. I will put it out.

Is there a side entrance? There's a side entrance, we all know about it. There are multiple entrances to the castle. There's one at the back, there's one on each side, in fact. All right, we all go on the side entrance, then? Which way did we sneak in and out of the castle as children? On the back side of the castle as children? Yeah, on the back side of the castle,

facing towards the woods and the family cemetery grounds and just the fields that you played in. Aura, do you remember the way we used to sneak in in the back? I do, brother. Perhaps this is a wise way to enter. I agree. It's a pretty small tunnel. Benny, you might not fit now, you're so big.

I'll make some space. Yay, more going through the woods, my favorite. Let's go. So you guys loop around in the dark. Leave the horses behind. Stills away, we're doing quite a nice long horse. But we kill the horses before we twist the wheel. Not yet, not yet. Wait, wait for it.

Don't let him transform the whole game. Just never let him transform it. Okay. I'll just wait, I'll just wait. I tie mine to a tree, though, so I know where my snack is. Okay, so you guys do, in the dark, make your way around. Do you want to leave the torches, the lanterns lit, or are we just going to go in total?

I mean, how good is our vision? Well, these two people are quite familiar with the woods and that of nature. I would not mind letting them go first. The woods are like a half mile out from the back of the keep. Our lanterns are hooded. We out from the back of the keep. Our lessons are afforded.

We can control the light. We proceed carefully. Okay, everybody make a stealth check. Woo! First roll. Really? Wrong one. Nope, wrong one.

Where's the big one? Thank you. You just hold that one. I'm holding the big one, thank you for moving this. Appreciate it. Great. Okay. Oh, wait.

I can't, oh, that's bad. Wait, what am I trying to do? Oh no, is that it? What am I trying to do? Stealth, thank you, stealth. Oh, that is bad, that's real bad. Now, I'm going to go with a five, I'm a five. All that time in the making.

Great, what did everybody get? 13. 13. 21. 14. 14. I seem to have tripped. Did you, did you? Six. Six, okay. 14. I seem to have tripped. Did you get a one? Did you? Six. Six, okay.

Okay, you guys are traveling along the outer wall, and Lucius is trailing behind, and you do hear metal scraping against stone for a split second. What is that? I'm fine, nothing. Is that a belt? What is it? How much metal do you have on you? It's the lantern. I dropped it. What is this? I'm fine, nothing. Is that a belt? What is it?

How much metal do you have on you? It's the lantern. I dropped it. All right. It's all right, you found our way. You found our way. Do you need to make some sort of like prayer or something before we go in there?

The moon weaver that guides me. Could you tell her to guide you a little better? Burn some incense, man, come on, let's go. So arguing, you eventually make it around back and you do find the one single small door that is on the back side of the key, but it also can be fired at from above, but no one's doing that.

It is also barred from the inside. Barred from the inside? You know, because you live here. Right. Obviously. It is also barred from the inside. Barred from the inside? You know, because you live here. Are there any signs of struggle or debris, arrow stuff? Make an investigation check. Look at that. It's just that easy. You just make it up. 14. No, nothing seems amiss. I mean, it is dark, maybe you're missing something, but it looks like the same old door in the same spot

that you would, you know, run out in the middle of the night. I have signs of struggle. Strange they wouldn't be anticipating our arrival. Because there's no one here. You guys are freaking out over nothing. It's just that they turn off the lights. Then who barred the door? Exactly.

How many times has no one been here? Our father has invited us, the entire family, yes? When has he ever missed an opportunity to hold a social gathering without all the frills? This place should be lit and filled with cooks and bakers and smells of love, and yet it is cold. Smells of love. You heard him. Smells of love.

Yeah, yeah, he always had the nice flowery. Should I produce a flame again? If you must. So we can't get into this tunnel that we've gone in our whole lives? You normally open it from the- Is it a trick? You open it from the inside and leave it.

That's what you've always done. Oh, it's locked. It's locked. It's barricaded. Yeah, it's not a. How old is the door? I mean, can we bust through the bottom part of the wood or something? You can certainly try.

Should I try? Are you strong? I am so fucking strong. I am not. I am not strong. I'm not strong either. Don't try to sleep through the bottom. Attack am not. I am not strong. I'm not strong either. Don't try to just, like, through the bottom. Attack that door.

I'll help you, you get advantage. Oh? If the DM allows it. If you want me to have advantage. Do you want me to have advantage because he's helping me? Well, I think you're probably, well, how do you want to, how are you doing this? Is it a wooden door?

Yes, it is. Heavy wooden door. You'll kick that shit. Yeah, just at the bottom, so I'm going to aim below where the barricade is, I'm going to try to make like a tunnel on the bottom of it, you know what I mean? Are you aiming for a specific location? The bottom center, where it's the weakest.

Shall I allume your effort? Do I see a weak spot where the wood, I mean, it's pretty old, there's a tunnel, is there like rotted wood anywhere? One slat is a little mangier than the others. I want to aim for that. You can have advantage because your brother and sister offered to kick out your dude.

Prayer of Guidance without her knowledge to the Moonweaver, of course. D4. Okay. Ha ha, Moonweaver. What are you doing over there? You praying? What are you doing over there?

What is that? The Moonweaver will see us through. Jesus H. Okay. It's fine, vroom, vroom, vroom, vroom. Pow. Jesus H. Okay. It's fine, it's fine. You got that d4. That true photo. Oh, good, okay.

That's nice. What do I just add my strength modifier? Yeah. Yep. 11 plus seven is 20. Ooh! Wait, 11 plus seven, 18? 18.

Maybe right. Okay, you do slam your foot as hard as you can into that board, and it does break, and there is now, it pushes in about this far, and it is dark in there, but there is now about this wide a gap. So if you can shrink a lot. All the rest of the slats just really try to move.

How does it smell? It actually smells terrible. It smells nauseating. Does it smell like sweet, does it smell like death? Yes. Like death? It smells like death. Like sweet death.

You do smell the smell of a heavily ripe rotting... Really try to bust through. It's probably just a rat or something. You know, those ran down here all the time. Also, Lucius, you know where you are. This room, which used to be a meeting hall, when you were inducted into the Temple of the Moonweaver, your father, as a gift to you, had it altered

and turned into a chapel in honor of the Moonweaver for whenever you visit it. We need to get inside. Does it look, I mean, from where we are, will you stick your flamey hand through the doors? What can we see, does it look like a lot of bodies in there? You can see about six feet in, just from the angle that the wood is in,

it's still blocking your way, and you can't fit your noggin through that gap, but you do see two legs and an arm and stone with congealed blood on the ground. Two legs and an arm of the same body? No, they look like three separate bodies. I was going to ask if the limbs were attached to anything, but I take it they're all separate?

No, I mean, you see up to a shoulder on one and the other one, you just see the ends. All right, I'm still not 100% sure that this isn't just some crazy surprise party or something. Really? I don't know, maybe I was wrong. Do you smell that? Yeah, that could be hors d'oeuvres.

I agree. How, thoughts? Break this the rest of the way, do what you need to do. I'll take it, give me a crack. All right. Excellent. I'll take my glaive and just. Okay, make an attack roll on that door.

Can you do it while being electrocuted and then on fire? Did you roll higher than a five? 21. You hit it. Roll for damage. Okay, I just roll for damage. These doors don't work with the Lorelei's. 11 points of damage. Oh man, the door breaks one hinge, busts inward.

You now have a one-foot view. It's still connected at one hinge. It didn't come off. It would be hard to climb up and over into the gap, but you're looking in. It's a pile of bodies. It's about 15 bodies piled in the middle of a chapel devoted to the Moonweaver.

We're going to need some light in here. Normally the castle is approximately how many stories and is this an underground level or? This is ground level. There is an underground level and it is three stories. Three stories, got it. We're on ground level. Do you recognize any of the bodies?

Yes, you do. You see one of the cooks, a woman named Estelle. You see the stablemaster and his eight-year-old son. And you see two of the guards, the others you don't recognize, per se. I live in the room. Can you? Look for Father. Oh my god.

Make an investigation check. No. Can I? Look for Father. Oh my god. Make an investigation check. No. And can I look at some of the bodies and see if I can discern the method of death? Absolutely. Be it burning or slashing or strangling? Is there someone outside?

No, we're inside. We're inside? The door has not been broken free, so you can look in, it It's hanging on a diagonal angle. It probably wouldn't take much more to take it away, but. 14 to look in. They are all slashed to shit. 14 for finding dad, too.

14 for finding dad. You do not see your father. We're still outside. I want to check. Shoulder. Just a moment. In case someone was anticipating us arriving, there could be a trap. I grab two rocks and I pray for light

and I throw them into the room at different angles so that I can see inside. Okay. Is there anything moving? No, nothing is moving and the door on the far side of the chapel, which leads into the courtyard inside the castle walls, is closed. You have very much illuminated the wretched pile

of lost souls in the center. Pews have been pushed to the side, and they're just in a heap, in a mound in the middle of the room. Break it down. We need to get in. All right. SAM and LAURA, Yes. of the room. Break it down, we need to get in. All right. Yes. Punch the door.

I will say that that door comes right off the hinges. Even though I rolled a two. To hit it? You rolled a two to hit it? I did. Oh, well, in that case, you... But it's plus six, so that's eight. In that case, the door comes right off the hinges,

clatters down onto the ground, and you're now standing on top of it. Oh. I rush in. Okay, Lucius pushes past. Anyone that I can help, anyone who's still alive. Make an investigation check. Oh, he's got a tower.

He's been doing it for 30 years. How have none of us ever used a tower in this game? I don't know, but it looks so cool. 18. 18. What did I just say, perception? Investigation. Investigation.

My perception is way better. They seem like they have been dead a while. In fact, follow that up with a medicine check. Kind of awesome. Felt it, felt it. 15. 15, okay, yeah. So you bend down by the body of the cook, a woman who has cooked many, many meals for you, and you check the body and study the blood on the ground

and how hard it is, and you can tell that it has been somewhere between, I don't know, two weeks, a month, maybe. These bodies have been here a while. Is my father in here? No, no, he's not. You push over a few bodies, you spend five minutes just sorting through the dead, and they're all... No, no, he's not. You push over a few bodies, you spend five minutes

just sorting through the dead, and they're all. These are dead, and although they brought us up, we must find our father. Wait, did he say how long they've been here? Days, longer, perhaps, and I start to go upstairs to where he would be. Well, there's no upstairs here, so the wall, within the wall are rooms on the ground level.

There's this chapel, there's a great meeting hall where your father receives people. There are the kitchens, there are the stables, and the courtyard is huge, and the entire thing is sort of empty in the middle. It's where you've trained and where you've played. You would get there by exiting the door on the opposite side in the middle. It's where you've trained and where you've played. You would get there by exiting the door on the opposite side of the room.

Someone will pay for this, but can we please open the other door? Are you going to barf? No. Are you going to barf? I'm not, I have allergies. Because there's blood and guts and brains all over the place. I should add, it's only the towers of the castle for the watch, and the keep, the central keep

that is three stories tall. The rest of it is low. Are there any shields or armaments on the walls? In here, there is only a single shield, which is okay. It has the symbol, the two arrows with the crescent moon in the middle that is the symbol of the moon we were upon it. I was too small to wield this when I was a child,

but now I will show my father different, and I grab it and I leave. Okay, so Lucius pushes past you all, just opens the door. Wait, Lucius, arm yourself. Everyone arm yourself. Lucius, by the dim light of the rocks that you illuminated in the chapel,

you can see a little bit out here. The first thing you see walking into the courtyard, it is mostly empty. What you can see is a pile of weapons in the center of the courtyard just piled up. There seems to be a cart on the far end, but it's very, very dark, so you can't make much of it. Okay.

It still weighs off, it's about 100, 150 feet away, but there's a cart, what looks like it's full of vegetables, half unloaded. You can't tell quite what they are from here, again, because it's still. The other others what I see on the inside. Okay. Don't go any further. Just wait until we come up with some kind of plan

or something, man. It's a cart full of vegetables. What kind of plan do you need? Our father might be in danger. We must move quickly. Does it look like the bodies were dragged into the temple, or does it look like they were murdered inside? Make an investigation.

Ooh, good question. 15. Yeah, there is the residue and trails of blood leading from the courtyard. You can't see it in the mud in the courtyard because it's raining so heavily. I'll add that it is still raining. Is it still raining?

Yeah, I hear it. You do? I can't tell from here. But just on the threshold leading in, you see trails of blood that are getting washed away by the torrential downpour happening. Of course, gets rid of the tracks. Do we care to visit the pile of weapons? Everyone have what they need, in case, you know,

someone needs to be dealt with. I brought one with me. If you guys need to stock up, I'll watch your backs. I'm good. I pull out two short swords from a back harness underneath my jacket. Excellent. Yes, my father.

Oh, is that a, oh, did the woodland creatures tell you where he is? No, I've spent many years in the woods. My senses are far more highly attuned than yours. All right, I get it. You don't like that I don't have a career. Is that what I said? I don't know, you're always ragging on me

to finish school and make something of myself. It's you, I'm simply speaking of your wolf. I get it. I wonder if maybe this is not the time to bring up old shit. I just don't want to be a craftsman. I smell, Father, is that not important to you? Yes, it is, let's go.

So from your. Where do you smell it? Coming from that direction. From your vantage point, let me just help you see the thing that you've known all your life. You're standing with the chapel at your back, and on your right is the keep, your home. Your old bedrooms are in the keep. Your father's bedroom, his study,

your Aunt Catherine's bedroom. You also, to your right, have the Great Hall. There are smaller, one-story buildings that line the inside of the castle. There are the kitchens. And then you can see the open gate now, because you've lit the

courtyard so well, even though it's further off. You can see the open gate now because you've lit the courtyard so well, even though it's further off, you can see the open gate where you were standing 30 minutes earlier and that cart. Also, you've been standing here taking it in long enough, you notice there are also two people on that cart. They're not moving.

I run to it. I'll join him. If there is an obvious weapon that I can wield in the pile as I pass it, if I pass it. There are many, there are many. There is probably somewhere between 40 and 50 weapons here. There are blades, there are mauls, there is a mace or two. I pick up a mace. Okay.

And I'll run to the cart on the lane. I will say also, as you're running and you look at it, this mace looks old. And as you run up to the cart, you see instant recognition from your youth, from your teen years, of one of the farmers that tills the land on Castle Lorelei's grounds

is shot full of crossbow bolts, as is his 15-year-old son. that tills the land on Castle Lorelei's grounds is shot full of crossbow bolts, as is his 15-year-old son. They're just leaning against each other, and it's a cart full of turnips and apples, some cabbage, and it looks like someone has started to unload it, although it does not look like it pulled up, it looks kind of helter-skelter. They're long dead.

I'm making a medicine check. 11. Yeah. Yeah, maybe it's the rain that has been pouring on them all day long, but you can't... There's not as much to go on as there were as the bodies indoors, but they definitely weren't killed today. Okay, good enough. These were innocents. These were our people. We were supposed to protect them.

This is an act of war. This is an act of civilization. This is our act to choose. If we cannot find our father, we must find him. Where are the living quarters? The keep, the largest structure in this castle, and there are stairs that lead up to a large, ornate set of doors into your home. Any light or signs of life up there?

Well, the doors are shut. Or is that where you smelled Father coming from? It's from that direction. Then let's make haste, shall we? Are there any foreign carts, horses, and travel devices at all in this court? Oh, like any carts that don't come from that aren't usually garaged here?

Good question, you don't see anything like that, and there's certainly no living animal or living being in here. Definitely keeping an eye out for any kind of movement, anything that catches our eye. No. We head towards the gates of the keep. Okay.

Who's leading the way? I am. Laura, she's the oldest. I better stay right behind you. Why is that? There's no animals to protect you. You need a real weapon or something. Are you a real weapon? Yeah, license to kill, man.

I appreciate your kindness, brother. You ascend the stairs towards the doors to the keep. Do you mean to just push in? I feel like we need to be cautious. Do you hear anything on the other side? I pray for guidance and listen to the door. Sure. Perception of 20.

Nine. Fuck. Lucius presses his ear to the door and his free hand to his other ear to block out the sound of the rain, shuts his eyes and listens for a full 30 seconds, and it takes you a moment to sort of cancel out the sound of the rain drumming, but you do it, and you hear absolutely nothing.

That was nothing? Nothing at all, no sounds, no creaks. All right, they'll be waiting for us. Still be cautious and we'll go in. Want me to go first or you? I need you to jimmy the door for me. All right. It swings open. It's big. You hit it and it just goes.

Nice job, human weapon. In here, in the Great Hall, it's not much, but there clearly has been a fire in the hearth here that is burning down to embers, so there is dim light in the grand entryway to your keep, to your home. The first thing that strikes you is a small wooden table and three chairs pulled into the center of the room, and there is a smattering of playing cards

thrown out across the table. Dad! I walk up to the table and swipe at the playing cards. Swipe them up, okay. Try to see, like, I don't know, sniff them, see if I smell anybody that we're looking at. Uh, hmm. Make an investigation check at disadvantage.

Oh, oh, oh. Guidance. I like it, I like it. How much can you do as guidance? Damn it, I got a 19 and a fucking one. Oh. Yeah, you've got the... Nope. You have got the reek of death in your nostrils right now,

and you can't smell anything else. It's a wonder you can hold your breakfast in. I'm going to run to his closet. This is dad's room or no? No, it's the entrance. Grand Entry Hall. Just the grand entrance? Your rooms, your rooms, the twins' joint room,

your room, your room, your room are all upstairs. Your aunt Kat's room is upstairs, your father's room, your father's study is upstairs. You gotta go upstairs. Yes, we do. You want to be the tip of the spear this time, Larry? Oh, I'm the tip of the spear, you're a human weapon. I'm walking up the stairs.

I look around the room to see is there any tracks in the room, anybody that looks like they might still be hiding in the room. Oh, yeah, okay, make a perception check. And while she's doing that, can I ask Aura if she smells farther in any particular direction? I'm sensing sarcasm from you, brother. 12. I'm being genuine.

That's just his major voice. There is a very nice carpet under that table and in front of that fire, and you do see wet prints pressed. Wet, wet prints pressed. Wet, wet prints. Pressed into the carpet. What does that mean, what? That means somebody's.

And Lucius is ascending the stairs, and would you make a perception check at advantage? It means whoever was here was here during the rain, which means they're probably still in the building. Is that a 20? Yes. Yes, it is. Yeah, girl. You, Get a girl, get a girl!

27. You honestly do smell your father. It's not strange for any of you, but especially you. You spend so much time in the woods, not in your human form, and that smell is coming from upstairs. We must proceed upstairs. The smell is getting stronger.

I mean, he lives here. Of course you're going to smell him here. When you see him, for Christ's sake. Did you say there's a print? Yes, fresh print from the rain. A wet print. Human? Human boobs.

Mm-hmm, a footprint. I look up the stairs. I listen as well. Sure, make a new perception check. I print. I look up the stairs, I listen as well? Sure, make a new perception check. I pray as I do. Does Jester have grads? I don't think so, no. I think, because I have a...

Oh wait, is that a cantrip? Yes. Mother fuck. You listen, you close your eyes and listen. You're a big listener. Silence. It's really a cantrip? Okay.

Come on. That would involve you helping other people. Father is upstairs. Bring him back, bring him back. All right. We must proceed as well. All right. Lucius.

Hurry. Him? Yes. He's got a shield. He's got a, all right. He's noisy. You're really noisy. One time. One time.

Let me go first. Why? And move out of the way. And I will tell you guys, just to remind you of the things you've never heard of before this very second, but you know at the top of the stairs is your father's study where he welcomes guests, and then out from there, in a ring, on the second floor,

are all of your bedrooms and your aunt Kat's bedrooms. Nice layout. It's kind of dope. Father's study first, then. All right, I'll open up the stairs and make for Father's study. The smell isn't coming from there. Just announce to whoever it is that we're with.

Where's it coming from? It is. It is. Oh, you're fucking with me. You're always fucking with me. You're always riding me. I think you're the funny one. I follow my sister. She knows. I'll back up against the door

and press it open with my shoulder. With your gigantic shoulder? Right, with all the scar tissue on it? Oh, fuck. So you're just pushing it open? Yeah. All right, you do, and nothing happens. Oh, I'm high-rider. That's so satisfying. Yeah, and nothing happens. Oh, I realize.

That's so satisfying. Yeah, it's good. But it's so familiar to you. You look around, scanning the room, and his shelves of books and ledgers are all there. A map of Wildemount is on the wall by Devin Rue. Not by Devin Rue. The great leather armchair, his great desk, but the thing that is not always there on the wall by Devin Rue. Not by Devin Rue.

The great leather armchair, his great desk, but the thing that is not always there is the severed hand sitting on it with a very familiar silver ring on the ring finger. Oh no. And a crumpled up piece of paper grasped in it. Lawrence, hide Portia's eyes. She can't see this.

Portia. Get the fuck off me. You'll faint. It's too gross. She was never the weak one. Who was? Larry. Yeah, that's true.

Just take deep breaths. You going to barf? Would someone please go check the hand? Rather deep breaths. I walk up timidly to the hand and look at the note. It grabs you. No. No, it doesn't.

Diddle diddle. You pull it out of very stiff fingers and open it up, and not much is written on it, but what is written is, I have him, come find him in the family's crypts. And while you're standing over the desk looking at this, your eye is drawn to the rest of the desk and you see many pieces of paper and an inkwell and quills

and what you deduce are attempts at forgery. Revisions and revisions and revisions and revisions. It was a trap. Who would have known where we all are? And why would they want us to come? This is all a big trap? For me? Is it me? This is for me, isn't it?

I take Father's Ring. Yes. Okay. And are you putting it on or just starting to? I take Father's Ring. Yes, okay. And are you putting it on or just starting to? Is it magical? I'm going to put it on a chain around my neck. Do I think it's magical? Is it magic? With Father's love, yes. Also on the wall, what you know is magical

is your father's sword. Oh shit. Vargr, which is a great black and gray steel blade, and an iron hilt with the skull of a wolf carved into the hilt. Oh god. I will take his sword. Is it a long sword?

I don't know if you can. Wait, wait, wait, I mean, you're, okay, here's the help. Oh god. I will take his sword. Is it a longsword? I don't know if you can. Wait, wait, wait, I mean, you're, listen, okay, here's the thing. I will take his sword. Because you are, you're kind of a magic person, and so people that use swords should probably use a sword. Understand? Let us, let us. Torche, it is a longsword.

It's a fucking longsword that's got a water specializing, you motherfuckers. I don't want to wolfsplain to you. So you're implying I'm incapable of weakening? No, you can do whatever you want. You're just saying you might be better with a staff. I have a staff. That's what I mean.

I am the eldest. I am the most deserving. Portia! You gave up your right when you took up the fucking woods! I mastered the taming! I stayed at the house! But where is your wisdom? It's right here! It's right here. It's mine. I earned this.

If you're going to be petty about it, you can have it. Thanks. Where is Father? Is there gore behind the desk, on the walls? Does he look like he was killed here, or just the hand brought in later? Make an investigation check. You're the dwarf.

No. 11. 11? Yeah, it's not too hard to find. There is a spray of fairly dried blood along the edge of the chair and on the floor. Quarter spray from the chair. Looks like he was killed perhaps sitting here at his desk.

Are you CSI-ing this right now? Not fairly common to the eye. Looks like a bunch of blood. Yes. But if he was here at his desk, begs the question, why was he not on his feet and fighting? Sneak attack. Or someone he knew.

Was he trapped? Possibly. Do we know of any enemies, immediate enemies, close to the family that Father might have had quarrels with? No personal grudges. Sitting in his chair is not the way Father would have gone. Wouldn't you agree, Lucius? He is a fighter. Why is his sword still here? Why did they not take it? Agreed.

Why is this place not turned upside down? Why is everyone dead, but only one person was in here? Didn't Father hurt him? Did he have a brother? No. He was an only child. Was he? Raised by his aunt. Katherine, I run to Aunt Katherine's room. Yeah, okay. You run down the hall as the door on the end, to the left, coming up the stairs.

Are you going in? Okay. Bust the door open. She has one of those old four-poster beds. It is clear that a scuffle is happening here. The bed is askew and there are shredded claw marks in the bedding. Make an investigation check.

I pray. 23. Yeah. That roll was entirely extraneous. You just walk around the room, and once you clear the other side of the bed, you find the lifeless body of your Aunt Katarine in her white gown for sleeping,

run through, dried blood along the white of it. What is it, Lucius? I pick her up. I put her up gently on the bed. I right her hair. But there are claw marks on the bedding. Someone will pay for this. You rolled a 21. 23.

23. You can tell by the lay of the sheets and the blankets trailing off the bed on the other side. She made those claw marks. Damn. You guys once saw your brother, Benicio, in his werewolf form, drunkenly riding on a horse and slam his head into a low-hanging tree branch.

And as soon as he passed out and hit the ground, he reverted back to his regular form. She fought. This is fucked up. More than father was able to. She was run through once? No, twice. Did this happen before they took father, or?

All right. What did the letter say? The crypts? The crypts, our family crypts. Do we know what the fastest way to the crypts would be? Do we know the crypts well? Yeah, you've been there, not in the last year, because you guys have been off, but at least once a year.

You would go with your father to pay respects to your own mother, who lays there now, and his mother, who lays there now, at the very rear of the crypt. So yeah, you know it well. It's on the premises? Yeah, it is. You were quite close to it when you were standing

at the back of Castle Lorelei, going through your old sneak away door. It's about a half mile away from the back. Before we just barrel down there, we should just make sure that there's no one else living or dead around. I just want to check our room. Can we, let's just go check our room. What are we going to do with our aunt? living or dead around. I want to check our room.

Let's just go check our room. What are we going to do with our aunt? I will bury her. What, now? Now. Now? She should be buried in the woods. Help me, then.

You're just going to rob her in the woods? There's someone? Let them bury her. Check the rest, see if there's anyone who can give us information. Maybe there's a hiding person. Yes, Portia, Benicio, and I shall check the rest of the floors, and then meet you

in the courtyard by the weapons. Come, you six. Okay, so what I will say is that over the next 90 minutes, and the use of a spade that you grab on the way out from the courtyard, you two go out to the edge of the woods and take care of your Aunt Katarine, who's very old. The rest of you search all your rooms.

You go to the twins' rooms first, your own. In that room, your bed has been slept in, and there are books thrown all over the floor, and pages torn out of them. You go to your brother Lucius's room, and it looks like his closet has been rifled through heavily. There's clothes strewn about the room. The bed has been slept in.

You visit Portia's room. You're yourself, Portia, and you see that someone has been sleeping in your bed, too. There is a bundle of crossbow bolts leaning against the wall in this room. There is a somewhat ratty, fur-lined vest draped across the writing desk. There is a dagger sticking out of the edge of the desk.

Can I look around that room and see? I mean, because somebody left their weapons here. They're still here. May I ask, the firmness of the mattresses in each room, was one too firm and one too soft, and one just right? Just right, yours, Lawrence, yours was just right. Son of a bitch! Question, in my bed, in the hollowed out bedpost,

was my girly parchment still? Your paintings of women from Marquette are still intact. They're still in there. Yes. Thank god, I'll pocket those. Yes, the Seven Dancing Veils scroll is still there. Not that I was ever in your room when you weren't there. Are we away during this?

You two are off, right, and if you want, I can jump back to you, but let's finish searching the house. The pages that were torn out of the books, were the books of any import that I would notice. Well, one was your book on maths that you were very fond of. Maths, maths. What is?

Math. It's just like, in England they call math, maths, and they call sports, sport. Right, let's take the S on that. Some of your favorite works of fiction are torn up. So personally. One piece of paper has a bit of poo on it. In the absolute corner.

I'll use it for toilet paper. Someone wiped their ass with one of mine? It is sitting next to a chamber pot, yes, in your room. I mean, I did that a lot when we were kids. Did you do this? No, I did not kill our family and go through your shit. Do I believe him? Make an inside check.

Natural 19. He's full of shit, he killed them all. Oh! Murder! Just one! In the interest of time, you do search the other rooms as well, you check your the other rooms as well. You check your father's bedroom,

which seems to be the first room that is totally untouched and perfect, not bothered with at all, as best you can tell. You visit your eldest sister's room. It almost looks untouched. It looks fine. The bed is made. There is a strange satchel in it

made of a very dark leather, oiled. Is it Orazren? Yes. It smells strange, not like the bodies of the dead, but it smells strange, spiced almost, and there is a dagger inside it with Elven on the hilt. Does anyone speak Elven? I do. Oh, I do.

I speak, oh no, I speak Sylvan. I speak sylvan. I do, too. I speak elvish. Both of you? I do. That was our secret twin language. It's. It very simply says silent message in elven on the hilt. That's all you find here. Do you want to keep it?

Sure, I'll take it. Lawrence. Why do you pretend you have an accent? What do you mean pretend? I've been educated. We all grew up together. No, I had tutors. You don't have an accent. I had tutors from abroad, and they rubbed off. Don't be jealous, okay?

Jelly won't serve you here. Our guest is so disappointed. She's like, all of this research. This is what I was sweating. Let's jump outside. Is there anything that we're missing, the two of you? Burial, last rites. Tears.

You were very close to her. I was. She told you again and again how much you reminded her of her older sister. She did. That's part of the reason why I went into the woods. I felt like following my innate path was the right choice. Among other things.

Shall we go back to the castle? Say one last parting prayer and we return. All right, you meet up in the courtyard and report to each other what you found. Found a stinky bag and a knife and some poo pages. Yeah, the stinky bag and the knife were in your room, sister. Yeah, here's the bag, do you recognize it at all?

I do. What? How? It reminds me of something. From before I took to the woods. Someone was here. I don't remember who they were. They came visiting?

They did. At least for a portion of the summer, but it wasn't spoken of. And they carried this. Were they... Man? Woman? Were they elvish? It was a man. Did he have pointy ears?

He did not have pointy ears. I know what an elf is. So he was an elf in disguise. Okay. You do occasionally have, you're not a very grand, noble family, but you do have emissaries come. Did he visit just the once? He did, but he stayed. Was he studying here? Doing business?

I don't recall. I was six. Oh. Do you remember his name? I don't remember his name, but I don't remember getting a good feeling from him. Was it an A word? I'm not sure if you heard me the first time. Well, sometimes it helps me if you heard me the first time. Well, sometimes it helps me if I think of the first letter. Should we go down to the crypts?

Should we try to rescue Father? Yes. Is there anything inside this bag? It was just the blade that they found. Oh, I do show the blade to the both of them. But the smell is familiar. Does anyone else recognize it? Do we recognize it?

Make a history check. Smell check. Natural 20. 24. Natural 20 and a prayer. Holy shit! 18. We're big on smells in this family. Well, you are.

Well, you are. They were like, flashbacks. None of you have ever traveled abroad, but you have been to different parts of Wildemount. And this bag is not any kind of bag you have seen, any kind of style of fashion in any of the places that you've traveled?

Definitely not from Wildemount. Does no one remember this man? No. If you were six, we weren't born yet. While they're talking, I prepare myself for the trips. I go put my armor on and gather my own shield and weapons. Excellent. I sit down in the rain with Father's sword across my knees.

Yes. I'm just trying to figure out what I'm doing. You don't have to. It is a badass longsword. Your father has let you wield it before in training. It is a plus two longsword. It does not require attunement. It's just very, very finely made and very sharp. And very sharp. I'm going to find some burnt coal or burnt wood. Just going to streak across my face a couple times, getting ready for battle. It's raining, you moron. Oh shit.

No, actually, in the last five to ten minutes, it has slowed to a drizzle. It is drizzling, you moron. Now it's just kind of misting at this point. It's only misting. it should last a good while. Anything you need to do to prepare? We're going into some shit down there. No, I'm always ready.

That's creepy. How about you, Aura? Are you ready for this? No, but I will proceed. There's not plus two longsword in Dandabee. You just add it in your hit. Just add it. Just do it on the fly.

Just add it, man. I don't understand what you guys are saying. So you guys exit through the same chapel that you entered in. Do I add it to my hit or do I add it to my damage or both? Both. Awesome. Amazing.

You exit out the back of the keep and it is dark out, although you are starting to get occasional wisps of the moon almost full appearing as the clouds break and then cover again. To get to the family crypts, they were built into a cave system discovered hundreds of years ago. And that, you follow along the tree line

about a quarter mile in that direction, it wraps around and that leads you to, what is the word, a mausoleum, a, what's the other word? Sepulchre? Sepulchre? Sepulchre. Yeah, like a domed entrance to the. It's a small building that serves as an entrance

to the greater crypts below. So we set off in that direction, I assume. that serves as an entrance to the greater crypts below. So we set off in that direction, I assume. Are we marching merrily along? Are we doing anything special? We trying to be sneaky? Fuck that. They know we're here. They know we're coming.

Going to carve them. Do you feel the moon? Do you feel the moon? I always feel the moon. I admit I feel little. Not a strong urge, but yes, some. This conversation happens as you trudge through the tall grass out behind the keep. For the final bit, though,

we cannot approach from the front. Several people it took to kill an entire castle of our friends and family. If they are waiting for us, they will expect it from the front, no doubt. He speaks true. Should we split up and enter from both sides? We should never split up.

This is what caused this, unfortunately. But we should come around from the side, I think. Okay. You could, you know intimately what it looks like. It is a low wall surrounds the entire cemetery, and it's broken, it's old, so the wall is fragmented and easy to enter from any side, really. There's an iron, wrought iron fence that, again,

is aging and decrepit, but that also surrounds the mausoleum itself. And many generations are buried both in the grounds and below. Alphar, the first wolf, is buried within. But you could potentially enter it from any of the four sides. To get to the rear, you would probably have to cut into the woods and then pop back out again,

but that's possible. I would like to suggest that to the group. She can guide us through the woods best, and we can have a look to see if there's anything waiting for us. I'm already covered in muck, no objections. I would feel more comfortable as my wolf self. You want to turn now?

The moon is full, brother. Well, yeah, but you don't have to. You're pretty scary when you're a wolf. I'm not a full wolf, brother. All right. Well, maybe not yet. I'm going to do it. Do. All right. Well, maybe not yet. I'm not done yet. Do it, sister, set the tone.

Thank you. I become a werewolf. Okay. You watch as Aura pops her shoulders and twists her neck, and you see her grow a full two or three inches, and her shoulders and twists her neck, and you see her grow a full two or three inches, and her shoulders widen, and that very familiar prickle of fur,

which starts like needles, but then pushes out and becomes thick. And do me a favor, Erika, what is the pattern of fur? Gray with white. Okay. And she stands there, her breath floating in the air. It's cold now in the rain, after the rain. And you're seeing her breath in great heaves in the air.

Seen that in a while. She has mastered the gift. It is effortless and graceful. Moonweaver bless you. Thank you, brother. I guess you'll lead the way, then. So through the woods to the back? Is that where we're going?

To the back? Well, you can approach the, it's open, almost, from all sides, so there is definitely an entrance. Yes. Lord. To the back. I think the moon is affecting you. Your hands are already turning. What? I slap his hand into his face and it looks down.

You know that in times of great traumatic pain, Venecio has always sought solace in slapdick humor. Well played, brother. Don't resist it. And into the woods you go. I don't require any rolls for this to find the way, because you've done it many times. You lead your siblings through the woods in an arc,

and take about 20 minutes to reach a point where you know if you then veer back to your right and out of the woods in an arc, and take about 20 minutes to reach a point where you know if you then veer back to your right and out of the woods, you will be about 100 yards away from the cemetery grounds. We are here solely to first gain information about our enemy and to see if they lie in wait for us. So we should move stealthy. All right. I should not lead the way. I'm the animal for us.

Indeed. I'll hang back and allow them, but I'll keep looking for everybody. So we're stealthing in? Are you hanging back, Lucius? I hang back a healthy distance while I can still see them, because I'm not good at dexterous things.

How far back are we saying? 15, 20, 30 feet, whatever's comfortable. So I'll say everyone make, maybe just make a straight stealth check. I pray for my stealth check. Oh shit. Right. I'm a two.

I'll see how the natural goes. Okay. I got a total of six. Oh, amazing, and you're brutal. A total of six. Yep. Okay, so you guys are stealthing through the tall, wet grass

after leaving the forest behind you. What did you get, Lucius? 12. 17. 17. 11. Everyone was worried about Lucius. Aura is so thirsty now that she starts, in the still of the night, just starts, you hear that deep roiling growl

in her giant rib cage now. But you stalk through the grass and you see that low wall ahead of you. And the rear wall of the mausoleum, or really the ceremonial entrance to the crypts. You don't see anything from back here. And you don't see many of the, the main cemetery grounds are in front of the structure. You're going to creep up to the wall.

Do you smell anything, sister? Climb the wall? We're going to climb the wall. How high is this wall? The wall is only five feet, and it's broken in places. You can just walk through. As they climb it, I walk around. I attempt to climb the wall

and dislodge a stone in my stealth. So you scrabble up. I scrabble up. Claw your way up. All fours. Portia strides in regally alongside you. Really? Really. You're now standing at the very rear side

of this stone, small building, not much bigger than the space that we are all in right now in this studio. You don't hear anything, you don't see anything. Do you want to, what do you want to do? Does your keen nose sense anything? Can you smell Father? Yeah.

No, but I smell that satchel. You make a perception check. Add advantage. Ooh, that means roll it twice. Take the higher number. Is that a nine? That's a nine. That's a nine.

Add advantage, so roll it again. And then roll again. And take the better number. Ooh, much better. 16. Plus? Plus? Other things. Perception? Whoa. 16, better. 16. Plus? Plus?

Other things. Perceptions? Perceptions. Whoa. 16, 17, 23. Thank you. Jesus. Wow. You smell blood. You smell living, breathing human blood. Shuffle closer.

Be careful, brother. And right now, you guys do not see much. You're just standing at the back of a building. There's no doors or anything. Not back here, no. No, you know it's on the other side, exact opposite side of where you are. Let's go around.

Can we hear movement? Make a perception check. 10. No, it's just the occasional sort of drift of rain for a few seconds and then stopping. It's on and off right now. Lucius, if we're going to be making our way around, it wouldn't hurt to take both flanks.

Very well. I will follow Aura. You're going to go with Aura? Yes, he's going to go with me. All right. Want to take the other side? Yes, indeed. I'll go with the Lamo twins. So you're with Aura and Lucius, then? Because we're pretty awesome.

Yeah. Gross. So it is Lawrence, Benicio, Portia, so three blood hunters. Oh, that seems fair. And our lady of the wood, and our man of the claw. Okay, who's taking the left and who's taking the right? We will take the left. Okay, still stealthing along, creeping around the edges, you start to see the wrought iron fence that surrounds this

building. You also see the cemetery has been from your vantage point. And there is, you can't see the source, but there is actually light here. There is flickering light being reflected from some source that you're not able to see on the cemetery which has been abused. You see headstones pushed over. You see piles of mud. You see cloth or canvas tarps lying about and great puddles.

It's a mess. There's somebody camping in our cemetery? Yeah, I go and inspect one of the canvas tops, whatever. They're further towards the entrance. I don't mind. You said that's where light is coming from. No. So if this were the building right here,

and I'm you guys initially coming around the side, you would see the light reflecting off of things over there. So it's here, but out of you. Right in front of the building that we cannot see the source. That you can't see the source. Flames, light? It looks like it, the light is sort of shifting. Listen.

You hear just the gentle crackle of fire. Maybe torchlight. My mom might be in the legs again. So we smell smoke. Make a perception check at advantage. No, you're not, make a perception check. Great.

19 plus seven. Jesus. Yeah, yeah, it's faint. 29 total. Yeah, phew, yeah, it's faint, but you feel that telling, acrid smell of torch. Torch fire. I tell my sister, but she already knows. I would assume we have the element of surprise. Yes.

There's only one door in? Mm-hmm. Should we just bum rush it? I mean, we're on opposite sides. We have to communicate with our siblings on the other side. We're on opposite sides of a solid building. Yeah, stone building. Yeah, you guys are exactly opposite each other right now.

Can I find a crucial part? They're doing a running gag that you guys are not in on. The twins and Portia begin to creep closer towards the source of light. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I suggest to my sister that I have no doubt they will attack if given the chance, so we'll just wait for the sign, perhaps.

We don't smell anything yet, do we? Weapons drawn. Have you turned the corner? Have we? I mean, we saw the dancing reflection. We moved to turn the corner. You moved to turn the corner. You can see just the, there's a giant wooden door

that is closed here, locked, for all time, unless Father's bringing you here for visits. But that door apparently is wide open and you still can't see the source, but the flickering light is coming from inside. Can we creep up to the edge of the door and I want to see if I can see a reflection in my sword? You know, if I like peek in.

So you're gonna try to peek in. You like a mirror, you know? Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. So as you stand there and hold your father's blade out to try to catch the light, you hear sound behind you from two places, the sound of fabric, and you hear, and this is happening in a second, what sounds like maybe metal banging off stone, and Turning to look, you see there are two men at opposite corners of the cemetery in the act of throwing canvas off of themselves.

Each of them has a sensor, a small metal box or cylinder hanging from a chain, and the metal is an oily black color or texture. You see in that split second, and they're starting to spin them, and a green, like sickly green mist or smoke is coming out of them, and you start in your peripheral vision on all sides,

start to see a little bit of movement. Everybody roll for initiative. Oh! Pull that number in your head. Oh my god. Oh my god, he's getting a map. Is this the bottom or the top of the dock? I think the bottom is the dock.

The bottom is the dock. Oh, I see, it's like the bottom. And then you have an initiative number. Yes. Okay. Oh, it's up here. Damn, that's awesome. Delightful. Look at your sheets. Oh boy, look at this map.

Oh, okay. Oh shit! Yes, we did. Liam, you call above and beyond. This is amazing. But wait, there's a lot of bad guys here. So we've got. Are those dead people?

What's going on? We've got Lucius and and here's our low wall. Lucius, who do we think is where? Lucius in the lead or is a wolf? The wolf. Okay. We have Portia and the twins right here at the door. Boom. Boom. Okay. Our men, here's one of them right here. He has long, dark brown hair and angular space. I know he's bringing up the dead. We have a man who's got, his head is mostly shaved, but wet, nappy, bluish hair pasted to his skull, and is wearing

some of Lucius's clothing. That's the dick that was in your room. So this is a person? This is a person, right? That is seemingly a person. That's a person. Everything else is dead. It's not moving?

No, beginning to move. Let's get those initiative rolls, guys. Oh boy. Ten. Oh, sorry. 25 to 20. Anybody roll 25 to 20? No. Okay. 15 to 20. 18.

18? Okay. I'm going to use these things called stat trackers to help me remember what the heck is going on. This episode not brought to you by stat trackers. Not brought to you by stat trackers, but they're really nifty. Where's the Porsche one? It's got all of your info on it, so I can see. So we'll start here, you're first up.

Ooh, cool. 18, did anyone get 10 to 15? 16. 16, so. I got 10. So hold on, we'll get you all in order. I got 12. 10. Let me see, oh. I got 10. So hold on, we'll get you all in order. I got 12. Let me see.

You got 10, you got 12, so Lawrence. And then Aura. Aura. Lucius, what did you roll? Technically, it's like a zero. Okay. Gotcha, gotcha. One of those fun 20s over there.

This down here. Front-loaded them. I'm afraid. So I asked her if we could, and so now. And, oh man, oh man, oh man, oh man, oh man, oh man. Portia, Denicio, Lawrence, Orya, Lucius. Skelly, skelly, skelly, skelly.

Hope we can see where they go. Yes, Portia. Oh, it is me. You are first. Oh my god. All right, Portia. Oh, it is me. You are first. Oh my god. All right, Portia. Okay. Oh god, oh god.

Ah! You know what you're doing. You know what you're doing. Totally! You've got a badass sword. I've got a badass sword. We're just going to run away. Wait, I'm going to see my bonus actions here.

Help me, Spirit of Matt. Where is your battle music? Is it happening, can you hear it? I don't hear anything. Come on, battle music. Jiggle the tip? Jiggle the cord? Jiggle the cord?

I'm sure the cord's working. So our curses, we can do once per, no, our curses we can just do every turn? Yes. You can, per long rest, do a curse two times. Anyone you want. The curses are more for reactions. Well, I don't know.

They're all different. Mine is the blood curse of binding. And can I do all these things as a werewolf still? Yes. In werewolf form, you can still do all your druidic spells. Cool. Binding is as many times as I want, right? Because it's just a bonus action.

No, it's two times you can do one of those maledicts. Oh really? As I understand it. Yeah, then I'm going to hold on, and I'm going to, is the gate, but the gate is closed? No, this gate is, you know, it's a model. This gate is open, hanging open, there's gaps, there's this guy with a skeleton there,

there's a dead warrior here. These are your ancestors, by the way. Oh god. Oh god. Oh no. Why you got to play it like that? Uncle Carl. I'm going to run up to this guy in the corner closest to me.

This one here? Yeah. Okay. Okay. And I'm going to swipe at his legs. Ooh, I don't want to take his head off, because he's my ancestor.

Because I don't want to take his head off. So I'm going to roll. Ooh, that's a 24. Okay, that hits. Okay. Okay, okay. Not yet. 14 damage.

Okay, so Portia runs forward with her father's blade, rams the sword through the ribs of this. Now I'm taking his legs off. Taking his legs off? Yes. You cleave right through. They are brittle and snap into pieces, and the thing just falls to the ground

and breaks into seven or eight different fragments of person, and they shake for a moment and lie still. He's dead? Well, he was already dead, but he's gone. He's dead already. For my second attack, I'm going to run forward and get this other guy closest. Okay.

Try it again. Go for it. Horseshot. Ooh, that's not as good, that's a 12. That does not hit. You go to stab through, and it actually goes through an empty space in the creature's body, and it pulls away.

It does go through its ribs, but does nothing to it, and it turns towards you. Now it is Benicio's turn, unless you want to do anything else. I'm going to look at the living guy. Yeah. And I'm going to go, I fucking see you. Okay.

And now we're onto Benicio. Oh man. Oh. Come on, go. I'm going to see my sister in trouble and be like, No way! And run up to her on her six. I can get there, right? Yeah, you can get to there.

Glaive attack the skeleton that's on her. Sure. Also, as you're running up here, you're noticing not a skeleton, but what apparently is just, I guess, a dog that came here to die is also climbing up over the stone wall, but you're attacking this one. Go for it, roll to attack.

That's a 21 to hit. That hits, for sure. Sure, sure. That's seven points of damage. Okay. You bring the glaive down straight on top of its head, and it just collapses in like a skeletal accordion, smashes to the ground.

Not moving? Yes, three seconds later, it is just a pile of bone and rags, and it is not moving. Oh boy. Am I within range of the dog? Sure. You take one more step. I'll spin and attack this dog, not even knowing if it's a good dog or a bad dog. It's dead. Oh, it's a dead dog?

Half of its face is hanging off. There's a lot of flesh on the bones, too, but not all the flesh. Okay. Cacao! Ooh, 25. 25. You take your glaive and you toss it up into the air and then and swing it like a gigantic oversized golf club. And the glaive's blade catches into the dog's guts. It bursts, something bursts inside, sprays your boot,

and the dog goes and flies through the air and crashes and rolls down the hill. That's great. Yeah, that's it, it's gone. Okay. We got a lot of dudes here, right? Okay. And then bonus action. I'm going to just whisper a solemn prayer

and cast the Rite of the Frozen on my weapon. All right, so that is. Okay, can I ask you a question? Yes. So our rites, can we do that every turn, every? Twice a day. It lasts. Twice a day, you can make either your claw or your blade have that extra arcane energy to it

and then it lasts. Okay, that's tight. I forget how long. It lasts until you shit. Until you rest. Until you shit? I'll look it up, you just DM, I'll look it up. Okay, great, great, great. Just don't do it if you're a lavender tiefling

with three hit points, that's the only rule. Don't do it then. Great. But, oh, I take six points of damage. That's right. Yep. From casting the rite. That's it, that's my move.

Okay. Now we're on to Lawrence. I see my brother and sister making such quick work of whatever these creatures are, and I'll run towards this front gate. And it's open. I would hope so, but I burst through dramatically. Cling, cling, cling, cling.

And I will attack that first beastie in front of me. All right, go for it. That is a 15. That does, in fact, hit. Nice. Oh, it's actually 16, sorry. 16 and that is one. Four points of damage. Four points of damage. Four points of damage.

What's your short sword, right? Yes. Okay, so you take your sword and you jam it right through its hips, trying to take it apart at the legs. You've seen how easy it was for everybody to do what they did, and the hip breaks off and the leg sort of shudders, but it

turns around towards you, still moving. That's embarrassing. Second attack. Okay. That is a 19 to hit. You bring around, you see it coming around and raising its own rusted old blade, and you just take your other short sword and swing it at the neck, and the head just goes pop

and flies in the air and bounces and actually rolls into a hole in the ground and scatters away into a grave. Excellent. Um, bonus, do I want to do anything? And I want to just stay there, because I feel it. Actually, yes, I'll use the rest of my movement to just come within melee of caped bastard.

It lasts until your next short or long rest. Oh shit, really? Yeah, what's that? The rite. So it's ongoing. It goes until we next short or long rest. Oh shit, really? Yeah, what's that? The right. So it's ongoing. It goes until we take a rest. I will use my bonus action to imbue my short swords with fire damage. Excellent.

And I will take this negative six. I think you only can do one of the swords. I don't think you can do both. You can do the one in my right hand, okay? With one at a time. Yes, not the stranger. While this is happening, can I speak to her because we're watching all of this?

If it's quick, yeah, sure. Three seconds. There is magic here, sister. Know that. Find the one doing the magic. That is the only one that matters. Yes, brother, I do. So now we're on our strangers,

and the one with the long brown hair, handsome if he wasn't covered in filth, just sort of backs up here and gets into this corner. Yeah, you better run. Leering and smiling and holding that censer hanging from a chain, and just you hear him mutter, go, go. This one does the same, he sort of creeps around, pushing backwards, eyeing you guys as he goes,

and he moves back into this corner, holding the censer aloft, and as he moves back, he yells out, Ray, Ray! Ray! And... Where's everybody? Portia, what is your armor class? It is 16. 16, okay.

You feel a crossbow bolt sink between your shoulder blades. You take... 13 points of piercing damage. And looking over your shoulder, you see a woman, a very ropey, again, ragged, red-haired woman standing at a perch on top, hiding somewhat obscured behind this, ah, she's dead, this spire up top.

She is wearing a ragged vest, and there's a hood, a very wet cloak over her, bare arms holding a crossbow, and she's just sort of leering down at you, and now. That's a lot of damage. As the skeletons turns, like, you got hit, Portia? Okay, so here's what happens. This one, five, ten, 11, I'm going to just move things first.

So this happens, this happens, since there's so many. This one is actually stuck in the ground and it's just going like reaching out towards you, Lawrence. This one steps into Portia. This one also steps over to Lawrence. Oh man. steps over to Lawrence, but this one closes in and starts moving dumbly towards this man in the corner. So does this one. So does this one. They just start converging on this guy. Are they going to attack him? Stuck. Same thing's happening over here. This one moves in, and as that's happening, you see looks of confusion and pants-shitting fear on their faces as they're suddenly surrounded by the dead. Over here, we've got three skeletons converging on Lawrence. Lawrence, your AC is 16. That's correct. I'm going to wolf out the other one.

All right, so the first two swing dumbly at you. They're not that fast. They're terrifying. They're covered and streaked in mud and 50- to 200-year-old weapons in hand, but they're slow. The first two swing at you, and you just very easily dodge out of the way. The last one does, while you're busy with those two, does manage to score a hit on you, and you take four points of slashing damage

as you feel an old, rusted blade bite into your back. Over here with Porsche, that's not bad, it's just one. Watch out, Porsche. That's an 18, also hits. You take eight points of slashing damage. What the fuck? Puts into your arm and you feel it gets through some of the scales,

where two pieces of scale armor meet here. It gets right in that way. You said watch out. Thanks, Benny. Then, in the corner, as they both start to go, one, two, three, four. Are they just bad at this spell? Clearly.

It's a two. Misses, misses, okay. So over on this side, we see two skeletons converging and run this guy through with old blades. He looks terrified and just white as a ghost as two old blades go. He spits and a glob of blood flies out of his mouth. He is still on his feet, though.

Dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah-dah. Okay, and over on this side, we get this. I better eat that bitch up top, I'm just saying. Yes, yes. Fuck off. Okay, so same over here. This guy is converged on as well. You hear him scream out in a high tenor and he takes a wedge out of the side of him with a sword.

He doesn't do as badly as his friend over there, but he is damaged as well. Wait a little damage for a second. His, okay. I think the skeletons are on our side, guys. You okay? I'm a little... And now we are on Orah.

Wulvan Orah, what would you like to do? Can I entangle from the angle that I'm at to the woman on the roof? Well, actually, can I see the woman on the roof? You can see her. So I have acknowledged that she's present. Yeah, she made herself known. She threw a tarp off of herself. She was in a little perch up there. You want to use Grasping Vines. I would like to use those if I could. It's Entangle.

Oh, excuse me, Entangle. It's Entangle. Okay, so. I mean, it's from the ground, but it doesn't specify the height of the vine. It's entangled. Okay, so. I mean, it's from the ground, but it doesn't specify the height of the mine. That's true. So I could wrap around the entire structure. So what's your spell DC,

when you want to remind me of that? It's on your character page in the bottom right-hand corner I wrote it right there. 15. 15, thank you. And it's strength, right? So numbers, numbers, numbers. Entangle. Okay.

Spring savings. So Vines burst out of the stone, out of the little cracks where barely any soil exists, but it still manages to crawl and grow and expand and twist around her, and she sees it and manages to push and pull away and jump over to this side, I'll say. She is not restrained.

She managed to pull it off of her legs and get free of it. But there is a huge patch of vines. Well, you didn't specify where it was, so she is surrounded by them, but she's still holding her own, we'll say. So the vines are still there. She can still move. Lucius, it's your turn.

Oh, she can still move, right? You. Yes. If she moves, she's fucked. Yes. But you can also move if you wanted to move your. You could close the distance on her. Your person over there.

Could I, oh, yes, so now do I, let me, question here. Yeah. Do I cross that off now that I've? That is a spell slot. That is a spell that I have used, great. Okay, cool, done. Yeah, don't do that. So now, I'm doing it, I'm doing the things. You are. Okay, great, okay, cool, done. Yeah, don't do that.

I'm doing it, I'm doing the things. You are. Okay, great. Could I, I don't know how to use that. Shoot, I'm not, but I do. Can I haste? Oh, you can only do one spell per. One spell at a time. One spell per, thank you.

So then I can just take an action? You can move right now, that was your action, if you want to get to a different position. Okay. I mean, I would go after her. Yeah, you should. I would climb. I would attempt to climb my vines. You could get over to the building. I would say climbing up would be your action, because that's a very involved thing.

That would be a separate action? Yeah. So I run to the building. You could use your movement to leap through this. Yes. All right, so you're hulking now, fur-lined body streaks through this gap in the fence and gets to the bottom. You're looking up at the edge, which is 15 feet high. Not too terrible for you, but it's up there. You're family. Sacred Flame. Yeah! It's a saving throw, dexterity. Okay. Versus 15, please.

And if she fails it, then she will also get the mark of waning. Ooh, what does that do? Remind me. The moon domain sends. Wonderful. Wonderful. The moon domain sins. The creature's speed is halved and it has disadvantage on strength ability checks until the end of its next turn. Roll for radiant damage, 1d8 on her.

Three. Three, okay. All right, we are back up to Portia. Where you at, girl? Portia. Oh, me? Yeah, rev. Nice. All right, we are back up to Portia. Where you at, girl? Portia. Oh, me? Yeah, girl. Rev those engines. I want to kill this! Oh wait, first I'm going to Crimson Rite my sword!

Wait, should I, though? Because my hit points are pretty fucking low already. It's not like you have enough time to decide or anything. Let's do it. Ugh, I'm going to Crimson Rite my sword! Okay, so you take six Hicks points. Hicks points. And I'm going to do... Fight name run with my sword! Okay, so you take six Hicks points. Hicks points!

And I'm going to do, I want to do, I want to do fire damage. I see my brother doing it, I do it, too. Sure, sure. I'm caught. Okay. So, uh... I'm going to hit this skeleton, I guess.

Showed up. The lore of our family's bitter in these woods for all. Faradir is wreathed in flame now. 18. 18 hits. Oh yeah. Porn Mash Whiskey. What do I add for my,

do I just add six to the damage now? Yes. Really? It's a d6. Awesome. You got roll it. So you got your plus two from your long sword. 16 points of damage. 16 points of damage. 16 points of damage.

The skeleton erupts in flame. It does a small mini explosion in the night here. Sparks fall, bone fragments fall to the ground. It is gone. You can still move. Yay. You can still. I'm gonna run over to my brother. This one here?

No, not that one, the other one. Your favorite. My weakling brother. Do you want to flank this one, or where do you want to go? I'm going to go the one at his back. So yeah, flanking. All right, advantage on that then. Sweet, and I'm going to try to hit him.

Ooh, good thing there's advantage. 14 plus nine, so that hits. Yes, it does. Gimme. Ooh. Extra d6. I did it. 18 points.

Oh man. Lady. You bring it right through the thing's spinal cord. The ribs go break again, little fireworks flying. It breaks in half and both the halves go flying off in this direction, scuttle across the ground, land in a puddle, and steam out after being hit. Thanks for that, sister. Now we are on to, is that the end of your turn?

Yes. Get all your stuff in. Benny eats you all. I will yell out. Oh wait! Do I have any movement left? You could go five more feet, I'd give you. I want to step on the, to where that, No, no, no, to where the stone is kind of blocking me to that stupid girl on the roof.

Oh yeah, cover. Yeah. Oh, nice. Yeah, real nice. Good call. I will yell out, Lawrence! And with my twin rage, I will run towards him as fast as I can. And when I get there, I'll-

Tell him that guy gets a swipe. Oh, is that thing going to get a swipe on me? Which way, where are you going? I'm going right past him. Here? I just want to get up in the face of the people that my brother is fighting. The cloaked one?

So it's five, 10, 15, 20. You can go two more, you can go. Sure, but is the guy, the fucker on the ground going to get a swipe at me? You don't know. Okay. Yeah, I'll just keep going. So where, here? Or let's just stand atop that fallen gravestone

of your ancestors if you want? Sure, well I want to get in range with both of the people who are attacking Lawrence. Okay, all right. Betty, Mark. All right, so five, 10 all right. Betty, Lawrence. Who am I? Five, 10, 15, 20, 25. Just stop there and I'll attack the first.

And I'll attack the first. I can always, after I kill him. You got two targets if you want. So you, go for it. Roll for attack. I'll attack the imposing guy who's standing. 20 to hit. That hits.

And I've got my frozen damage activated. That's, woo, 16 points of damage. Some of that is cold damage. But do the undead, wait, are they, do undead take cold damage or are they? I don't know. They do. They do. The halberd, you smash it into his giant spear,

knocks the spear out of its bony hand and the halberd keeps going, smashes down into his shoulder and ice fragments go and fuse all the bones together, hardens the thing's cape in ice and it just teeters over, falls to the ground and breaks into two pieces of frozen skeleton pop. So that one is gone.

All right, and I can't move any closer to the other dudes. You could go one more, five more feet if you wanted to. Would that get me in with the other Skeletor? With this one? Yeah. Okay, this one goes. Just sticks his blade out at your ankle. Sure. But you know, he's stuck up to his bony navel, so he does not hit you, it just strikes nothing.

Not so fast, little man. I will attack the other skeleton. Yes, go for it. I got you, bro! 22 points to hit. 11 points of damage. Okay, so you take your halberd in your hand, overhand like this, you walk up to it, you go and knock it right in the skull, and the skull just caves in and fills in like snow cone, just ice fills the thing's skull. The head gets heavy and drags the whole body down and falls into the

mud. I'm standing right there, got a real good view of it, and I just start. And as a bonus action, I'd like to noogie my brother. I will allow it. No! Yeah! Dumb stuff!

Deep reflection off me! And coming off of that embarrassing noogie, what do you do, Lawrence? I go over to the man in the ground and strike him thoroughly. Okay. Fisticuffs? I'm going to give you advantage on that.

Shit! Better! 17! 17 hits. 13 with flame damage. 13 with flame damage. I'm just going to save for flare. Yeah, it's on fire.

No, my shot's on fire. No, my short sword! Oh, your short sword. Yes. Just because it's fun, I'm going to say you come at this thing with your short sword and go, flip it around to the pommels and just go and nail its skull from both sides, and it breaks into fragments, and the arm just goes and falls still. Thanks for the noogie, you might want to duck. And I'll use the rest of my movement to take cover behind that pillar,

echoing what Portia is doing as well. Excellent, excellent. Okay, the stranger's turn. Oh, yeah, well, you're twins. Yeah. What do they want to do? So the one that looks like Ragged Hippie over here throws down the chain and starts to try to climb up

on the wall, and they all lay into him again. Okay. Hit. A lot of them. Hit. All right, okay, so. Is him. Hit, hit. All right, okay, so. Is that four more? Four.

All right. Okay, they all stab him in the back very heavily. He takes it into the small of his back. In between his shoulder blades, he screams out in pain. And starts, falls down on the ground, gets back up and starts moving. He got stabbed in the back four fucking times and he still ran away?

He took. And then over there, this guy goes, Ray, help me out here, Ray! And he's not going to go down. Oh, yeah, he is. He rushes forward with the blade that he's holding and tries to shove it into the skeleton and actually runs into the adjacent skeleton's blade

and gets stabbed in his own gut. He's freaking out and panicking. He starts to try to climb up, he's rethinking his decision. Okay. Okay. La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la. He screams out pitifully.

You've gone from hatred to a brief moment of pity because he sounds like a wounded animal. Stumbling over, climbs up. This guy's tough. This one moves. Entanglement. Yeah. She makes a half strength, right, so it's a disadvantage. She is stuck. Hey, you got it.

But can still attack, but can't see the werewolf that she just saw running down the side, but she does see the Moonweaver's Chosen, so she fires at him. Duh. Your armor class is 16. You wouldn't shoot a creep. And she gets, she misses. She misses.

The crossbow strikes the wrought iron fence and clatters to the ground and she is stuck there. The moonweaver protects me. So holier the mouth. So entitled. Have you heard the good word? Hello. My name is Niamh.

Sorry, Charlie. They're all leaving. Yeah, let them run. It's okay. They're chasing that incense. They belong in a museum. They're chasing that Nag Chamba. Whatever's in that shit. I mean, they've got to be drawn to it, right? Yeah.

But so they're going after him? It's because they're our ancestors. They know who the enemy is. I don't know about that. Who's the lady on top? I don't know, we'll find out. We're going to kill him. We're going to get Tarq to move first.

As long as they keep running, we'll do it. Yeah, oh, okay. Keep running, we'll do it. Oh, okay. All right, that guy is pushed down to the ground and just run through by three of them standing around and stabbing away. He did. Over on this side, we got... He chose. No.

Holy. Yes, no. Four for all. Shit. Yes, no. Shit. Yes. No, okay, so. You're rolling for all these guys. Liam, you're such a fair play. That guy's dead, too.

Oh, great. He is ripped apart, and you see actually one of them turning its sword upside down and just sawing into the back of his neck. Ooh! Are they on the other side of the fence now? They've climbed, some of them climbed over that low wall there, that's right.

We've all been longing. That's it for them now, Aura is up. All right, Aura. I go to launch myself onto the roof. Okay, make an athletics check. She's a wolf. I know. I don't know what that means.

Ooh, athletics. Athletics. Is it athletics? Oh, shit. 14. Oh, wait, but it says wolf. Add two. Well, is that wolf?

Yes, it is. We're already good. That's true. Cheap. Well, is that wolf or, yes it is. We're already good. That's true, okay. Sheep. Oh, we're good. Leap's claws grab the lip of the roof and you just yank yourself up and you actually fly a good three feet higher than you need to and then land. And your clawed feet clutch into the ground

and you are now staring at your prey. It's the prey wearing the brown face. Fuck him up! You used your action to get up there, but you could still, as a bonus action. Can I use a? The action was to hoist yourself up to the top of the roof, but you have a bonus action left,

which you could use to take a swipe if you wanted. Can I use a spell type thing? If it's a bonus action, you can. If I have an artifact. Yes, okay. I don't think that you do. This one is, If it's a bonus action, you can. If I have an artifact. You heal her. Yes, okay. I don't think that you do. This one is, but this is not helpful.

Oh, shh. I mean, I go toward her to... Claw her to death. No, to grab her. Yeah, okay. Violently. Oh, yeah. Yes, well, in the body, but throat, head. Rip off her head. Restraint, full restraint.

I do not rip off her head. We need to know more. Restrain her head by ripping it off. I would say that that's too much. The best you could do is get right up on her business or slash her as a bonus action. So I could? Because these run in like six second chunks

and you've just taken most of that time to go. She can stand up right next to you. But I could sort of stand up next to her. Okay, can I? Not after hoisting yourself up, I'm going to say. Can I slash at her to trip her? Well, she's held by vines at the moment. You can at disadvantage.

Do it. At disadvantage. Yes. I believe that. Use your attack. Okay, that's a nine, okay, nine. 18. Nine. Take the nine, that's a nine, okay, nine. 18. Nine. Take the nine, that's a nine total. Nine plus. Nine plus. What is this, an arm strike?

Well, I want her to hit her armor class. Okay. Wait, so what is she adding to the attack? It's an attack. So it's strength. So it's the attack bonus next to her claw, which is like a weapon on her page. So the center of the page.

Oh, thank you, okay, plus five. So 14. You slash your fur-lined claw through the vines, but it is thick and you can't even get through it. She is so wrapped in. You manage to get your claw onto her ankle. Your old spell bested you. But she's too firmly held in place by your own druidical power. Now we're onto Lucius.

I love Lucius. I see that she has it in hand. Is this woman attempting to attack again? Is she reloading the crossbow already? Now she looks like she knows she's about to get fucked up. Then my sister has it. I will move in front of my siblings. Is that correct? Mm-hmm.

I will get closer with an eye on this. I don't want this to turn back on us, and I'm prepared for that-hmm. I will get closer with an eye on this. I don't want this to turn back on us, and I'm prepared for that. I will, in the meantime, say a prayer. Going out of his shoulder. Apparently she's bleeding. You're what, you're bleeding?

She was bleeding, she's bleeding. Yeah, it sucks, doesn't it? I know, when the healer doesn't want to heal. Ha ha ha! What are you going to pray for over there, T? What's she praying for? I don't like the rain, so a clear sky is perfect. I will pray for a clear sky.

Or healing. Clear sky. Yeah! Bless Mama and Papa. If I could have one wish this Christmas season, it would be that all the little boys and girls of the world. Moonweaver, please see that my family

does not bleed to death this night. Healing word? Healing word. Lucky you. What is my? I think you just don't do it, don't you? Yeah, it just happens. Yeah, I think it's a d4 plus.

I got it here, I got it here. Spellcasting modifier, what is it, seven? It's one d4 plus your spellcasting modifier, so 1d4 plus five? 10. 10 points? Yeah. Wait, 1d4 plus?

No, sorry. Six. The best you can do is nine, I think. It's 1d4, and you're? Eight, sorry, eight. Eight. All righty. All righty, all right.

Thank you. Thank the Moonweaver. I was also hurt. And we are back at the top. That's for all of you. No. Right? Oh, Healing Word heals. No, it's just for one person.

There's an ass healing word. Oh, right. And there's healing word. I know, obviously. Guidance, guys. I'm going to... Come on, Sha-Sha. I'm going to just walk up to the door of the crypt.

Yeah, okay. Such a middle child thing to do. Riding in, you get up and you see a brazier propped up and sitting behind. A giant round, when you come here, there's a giant round iron gate in the floor that is locked as well, that is just pried open and bent, and there is a crowbar sitting in the corner in here, and marble stairs lead down, and you see just the edges of a passage disappearing,

which you're very familiar with, obviously. Right. Ah, shit. Okay, I guess I'm going to run, try to get over to the corner and get that thingy, the green thingy. So over here? Yeah. So you went five, 10,

I'll say five, 10, 15, 20. Do you want to go this way? Sure, why not? You're that far. I can do 40 feet. Whoa, how'd you get so fast? I have skills. There, you're that far. Anything else?

I'm going to just stand there. Okay, good. Super cool. Action to dash. Oh, that's true. Okay, I'm going to put another 40 feet. Okay. Thanks. 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. Brought dead people to life.

I won it. Did it? Oh, maybe. Okay, is that where you want to be, or did you not want me to put you right by one of the skellies? Yeah, it does go there. Okay. You just ran into the middle of the battlefield

where all the fucking skeletons are, away from everybody. Okay, Benicio, you're up. I'm looking at my sister running towards these skeletons and I'm very confused. What are we doing? I suppose it's one less share, really, for the inheritance. Best to let her go.

All right. I get, uh... What? All right, I'm going with Portia. I don't know. Seems like she knows what she's doing. You're going too? I mean, the nerds can take care of the chick on the roof, right?

Is that, am I a nerd? Yes. So you get to either side of her. On her left or on her right? On her right. Okay. Okay. And hold your ground.

You've got to hold an action before you move, right? Was it? Was it? Yeah. Yeah. Sure. I don't know, do you know? I don't know. I don't care. You can hold an action if they come at you and take some. No, I'll just wait. Okay, great. You're not allowed to move, then hold an action, are you? I don't know how this

works. It's whatever I say it is. How come we don't know anything? I'll let you stand at the ready. I will stand at the ready. That's me, that's not you. Don't at me, bro. Okay, good. Now it is Lawrence's turn. You know what? To make it easier on you, I'm just going to use my action to, what is it? I can't do

patient defense, right? I'm not a monk. I'll do a dodge, I'm just going to use my action to, what is it, dodge, I can't do patient defense, right? You can dodge, yeah. I'll do a dodge, I'm doing a dodge. Right. Great. Okay, Lawrence. Fuck that noise, I'm going in the gate and up to the crypt door that is open and I can see down, right?

Yeah. I'm just going to go down that shit. Okay. You're walking into the crypt, alone. Yes, I am. Okay, so just to remind you what you know, this is your entire family line down here. The torchlight only goes in another 30 or 40 feet

before it disappears into darkness, but you know that this passage goes a good 100, 150 feet straight, and then it takes a right, and it's basically a giant L down here, and it goes another equal distance to the end, and there are figures of your ancestors evenly spaced down the entire hallway, and at the very, very end is the monument to Alphar and the monument to his daughter, Grenya, who wait at the end, as well as a small monument that Katarine and your father built in their,

of their own choice, for Genevieve. If I get to the bottom of those stairs before it turns right. Well, bottom of the stairs, 150 feet right. Gotcha. And it's shrouded in darkness. You can't even see the elf in the corner. Wait, you're in? Yes. He's just crept in the stairs, 150 feet right. Gotcha. And it's shrouded in darkness. You can't even see the elf in the corner. Wait, you're in?

Yes. He's just crept in the bottom, yeah. Why didn't you go in? I was waiting for everyone. I don't know. What would you like to do down there? I don't know what she's doing. Watching.

Can I make a, can I just see if I see anyone, smell anyone, hear anyone? Sure, make a perception check. It's a straight roll. 19. 17 plus two. You can hear the clatter of blades above, and you hear, what, what, what are we doing? From up behind you. I don't get it.

But there's a lull, and you listen very carefully. No, nothing, nothing that you can tell. I turn my head, oh, sorry, go ahead. No, you finish. I was going to say, I turn my head, and I'll be like, kill the woman, or find out what she knows, and get down here! Okay.

Okay, so the, fucked up position. She is going to attempt to break out of the Grasping Vines. And she does. She has half strength, so it's a disadvantage, thank you. No, she does not. She yanks against it, and she is starting to hyperventilate, looking at the big beast

of a woman in front of her. She is going to attempt to fire her cross. No, she's not. Her action was trying to get out of the vines. So she is beginning to urinate, and staring at a large. That's her bonus action. That's a bonus action. Almost undetectable in the mist.

That's just what I wanted. Oh no, these guys are attacking? You fucking morons. How are we going to assist them? Hey look, all the enemies left the entrance where we clearly have to go next. Let's go follow them. 25. It's hard getting over that little wall for them,

but they can do it. Just think. Oh wait, that's the dude you killed. 25, 30, he can't quite get around, and over here, we're going to... Ah, break. Laura, Lucius, listen to me. Think of it, only three shares for the fortune.

Let's leave them. Actually, five, 10, 11. Oh my god! Oh my god! What did you do, Portia? Fucking ridiculous. I can't believe it. You've been playing this for fucking years. 20, 25, 30.

Why would you do this? If you went after her! I can't leave her there alone! Sure you can! I love my family. No, you don't even like her. I like her better than you, big dweeb. So they just come, they start 28 days in it later,

they just come. Oh my god. One of them who comes into my range. Yes, you can later, they're just coming. Oh my god. One of them who comes into my range. Yes, you can strike, so go for it. I will attack, because I am a polar master, but I only rolled a 10. Okay, so that, there's no, a 10? Does not do it. You are, exactly, you are a little bit overwhelmed

by the clattering of a small horde coming at you, and it actually has a shield, so it goes to the side. The one that you just hit swings back at you, definitely hits. Even though I'm dodging? Yeah, oh. You chose to dodge, so you can't attack.

I don't know, that's a reaction. I don't know how this works. Well, doesn't matter. My action was to dodge. To dodge. My reaction was to polearm strike. Oh, right. How do you? He still gets a reaction.

But that's when something walks away from him, no? No, I'm a polearm master. I've never heard of that. I get to attack when they enter my range. I believe you, because I've known you a long time. And it does, but you do got the dodge action. Okay, a lot to, oh, so it misses, great, thank you. Okay, that was a clatter of wills

between Shield Skelly and you. The one next to him got a natural 20. Great. That's eight, that is 10 slashing damage. Points? Yeah. Great. That's eight. That is 10 slashing damage. Points? Rough. Okay, Portia, let's see, three of these things are in range. Miss, miss.

16. That hits, the last one hits. Portia. You take three points of slashing damage. You feel your coat tear and just the edge, the point, just the tip of a blade poke through your scale armor. You feel a little cut on your, a little small on your back.

Now we are on to Aura. I cast... No. Disembowel. She's out of the vines. She's in the vines. She's in the vines. Right, because she's still weak and, okay. Well, I leap on her. Okay. I leap on her and I pin her.

You want to hold her down. If I can hold her down. Yeah, make a strength check at advantage. Okay. And werewolves talk. Yes. At advantage, so roll twice. 16.

Yeah, that does it. So she is pressed down, and your claw is holding her shoulder in the ground, or into the vines on top of here, and she's just unable to talk, just frozen like a deer. And could my net, can speaking be in there? It's in there, quite sure. Who are you?

And we'll get to that. Lucius. I am going to move. May I move? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, he knows where the better siblings are. Two shares for the fortune. Fantastic. I have the fortune. Fantastic. I have this share.

Yes. Do it, do it! Come on, pray or something, man. We're dying out here, bro. I will... start to pray. Yeah, you got to pray. Yeah, you got to pray. My first prayer will be to channel divinity.

You lost your right to this land. When you died, you are no longer our lives. Leave this place. I turn undead. Yeah! 15, 20, 25, 30, I'm going to say that. They're all in range. We got one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

Somebody has faith in their sibling. And what's the DC? 15. 15. Fail. Fail. It was my plan to get them all to clump up together so you could do this. Fail. Fail. Fail. Fail. Success. These skeletons glow with a pale whitish light.

They raise their arms to the sky, reaching towards the moon, which is now clear, and then just fall. Yes! Oof. Yeah. Oof. Whoa. Into a clatter.

Our brother is a thumb. of death around you. Well played. And now we're on Portia. Ha! I'm going to attack the guy that's in front of me. Go for it. 18. Yeah, hits. Woo!

Eight, five, eight is 16 plus five is 21 points of damage to the guy. Okay, you are charging on adrenaline and you take that sword that belonged to your father and ram it straight through the skull. It goes through the eye socket out the back and you have to shake it hard. While I shake it hard, I swing at the next guy standing next to him. Excellent. With the skull still on the blade, go for it. 16. It hits.

Ooh, yeah, that's good. Eight plus eight is 16, plus six is 22. Okay, so the skull crashes down on the skull, and it does not get obliterated by slashing damage, it's bludgeoning damage as skull hits skull, and it just crunches it down into the top of the rib cage. It comes condensed, so the head is down here now, and the two, the one falls to the ground

and you just tilt your blade and it goes off the end. And then I step back. Yeah. Next to Benicio. Yeah, yeah. And I say, it's your turn, Benny. Benny!

I will charge and attack. Wow! And roll a 13. Hits. Yeah. Just. Oh yeah. 13 points of damage. Okay, all right, you send it right into the things,

because you're a cruel motherfucker, right through the non-existent groin of this thing, and then just give it a circle around, and centrifugal force shakes the poor bastard apart, and the ribcage falls to one side, the legs clatter to the ground, fall down into the hole that the thing climbed out of. Earlier.

I'll grab an arm and just be like, where are you hitting yourself? Love it. All right. Oh no, where's Larry? I'm down here! You know, we have a terrified redhead pinned under a werewolf on the roof of the mausoleum, and Larry's down in the dark.

I think this is a good time to take a roll. Yeah! But before we do, it's time for our giveaway break. Important to know, we have made some changes moving forward. You'll need to enter the weekly keyword into the Critical Role Twitch chat. So if you are watching on the Geek & Sundry Twitch channel or on alpha, you'll need to hop over to twitch.tv slash Critical Role Twitch chat. So if you are watching on the Geek & Sundry Twitch channel

or on Alpha, you'll need to hop over to twitch.tv slash critical role and enter the keyword. Right now, the offer is only good for residents of the United States and Canada, excluding Quebec, for the official rules. Sorry, Quebec. Follow the link to the chat. Tonight's prize is this Myrtlewood dice tower system

featuring Cortrium Cartography by Devin Reed. Whoa! It's got that pretty leather strap. Look at that gorgeousness. Holy moly. Wyrmwood, Myrtlewood diceice Tower System. Just a mysterious event. I am about to give you the keyword, but remember, only enter it once in chat.

Entering more than once will disqualify you. After I say the keyword, the contest is officially started. The keyword for tonight is howl. Yeah, that's a good one. H-O-U-L, howl. Howl. H-O-W-L. Good luck, y'all.

And please keep an eye on your whispers as we will be reaching out to the winner for eligibility during the break. I'll see you soon. Okay, I get it. We interrupt this Critical Role Podcast Network broadcast to bring you news of dangerous treasures that lie sealed within the Critical Role shops. Only the heartiest of adventurers

should dare seek them out. In all seriousness, though, I'm Matthew Mercer, and we've made some very cool things that we really like and hope you will, too. If you'd like to support the show, please consider visiting any of our Critical Role online shops through the shop tab at critrole.com and see if anything catches your eye. Okay,

back to the show. Welcome back. Welcome to Werewolfville. Here we are. Titty sprinkles, how about that? That's great. Great. So we have a winner for our contest.

I'm not sure how to pronounce it. It is horse nipples. No, it's oldar underscore. Oldar underscore. That is an underscore, not the word. Congratulations on your wood. Yes, we have an amazing piece of stuff. It's friggin' gorgeous. There it is one more time, and it's Wulmwood. You know what? I really just want to dive back in because there's so much to do.

Where'd the map go? It's gone. We're done with that? Yep. I don't know. We know where everything was. Okay. We can start exploring without Laura. So, Lawrence, she'll come out when she's ready. Lawrence is down below.

Portia's counting her lucky stars. I'll say, Aura, you are currently a big black and gray furred beast leaning down on top of this bedraggled ginger thug on top of the mausoleum. She is petrified. There's just a moment of silence between the two of you as you huff in her face. You can hear the wind now moaning low against the walls of the castle in the distance and through the trees behind you. I said, who are you? Which comes out in a deep, bassy rumble. Make an intimidation roll. Nice, nice, nice, nice, nice.

17. Tia Stock. Tia Stock. I'm from Teyastock. Teyastock. We're hired, we've been living here for weeks. Working for the elf. That's it, we just do what he tells us. Where is this elf? He's waiting for you. He told us to soften you up.

To soften us up? For what, exactly? I don't know. We don't know. Tell us where to go! Oh shit! You feel a little bit of warm liquid run against your knee, your furred knee in the vines on top of the building. Down, down.

That's all I know. I swear to all the gods, I don't know anything. Does she know where her father is? If he's alive. Do you know of a man named Haldor? Yeah. Yeah, we watched his... He hacked his arm off.

He's got a number. He's got a number. Please. Please. There's a lot. He's got them down below. Please. Who is looking at it? Please. I'll go up right now. I'll run in the woods. I throw her off the roof.

Oh! She arcs over your head, Lucius, and you watch her strike the wrought iron fence behind you. And she lands with a sickening splut as two of the metal poles go through her gut, and she is now hanging backwards on the fence, but she's not dead, and she's now just gasping. I will say a prayer for you. She's holding the iron coming out of her belly.

It's like a threat. This prayer is called Toll of the Dead. Oh shit. No mercy. May I do it? Absolutely. May you please do. Wisdom save or take damage. Your DC is 15, right? Absolutely. May you please do. Wisdom save or take damage. So we take your DC is 15, right?

Yes. She just makes it. So it's 1d8. She's damaged, it's d12, yes? If it's missing any, the damage is, creature, you must pass the wisdom saving throw. If it's missing any hit points, the damage is 1d12. She wasn't, otherwise it's 1d8.

The damage increases by one die when you reach fifth, so that is 2d8. 2d8. Wait, she's not damaged by the spikes? Oh, of course she is. You're right. So it's 2d... Thank you, 2d12. 2d12.

Because of his level. 13 points of damage. She just starts gibbering, going and you watch as blood starts pouring out of her nose and her ears and she's just like a goldfish gasping for breath, going This too shall pass. I turn around and I walk.

What is this? It's not passing yet, though. She is just there going. Oh! What religion is this, dude? That's crazy. Bro. She chopped our father's hand off.

Yeah, yeah. But wow, that was ice cold. Please! Uh, all right. I guess I'll go just jab her with the glaive. Twist a little. Like, just jab her with the glaive. Twist a little. One more twist. I'm not killing her.

Okay. She's still. She's alive?! She is still. Oh. She's a pro at that. She's still. Now you all stand around the absolute wreck of this woman, listening to the wind moan on the hill of Castle Lorelei,

flame flickering in the sensor inside the mausoleum. Let's go get Dad. What did you learn? What was that, brother? What did you learn? She said he was down below. Did she say who took him? The elf. It was an elf!

It's always an elf. Told you, fucking pointy ears, man. I didn't see any pointy ears. Are you all done? Are you still down there? It's very cold and dark. Do you see anything, brother? No, I am hesitant to proceed without you. We are coming.

All right, let's go. Do we need to do anything first? Anyone need to heal or? Or transform. Oh yeah, yours must be wearing off soon. How's that work? Ten minutes. Three hours. Oh, really? Three hours?

For all of you, because Aura has spent so much time free of the shackles of polite society, she has lived in her second skin for long periods of time. Okay, you two. Whoa, that's pretty amazing. You could do a short rest here if you wanted to, or rush to your father's aid if you wanted to. We gotta rush to our father's aid, right?

But don't you need, are you okay? I mean, I'm at like halfsies. Rest, you should rest, and I will pray. Dad might be bleeding out right now. Yeah, he's got no hand. Do I hear any? If we rest, it's a half hour. It's still dark.

The day that we have already seen has been days in the making, and do not think that anything new is transpiring if he wants us there. And just as a reminder, I think I said this, when you were studying, looking at things in the study, or did you look? I did.

Who saw the blood on the floor, you did? Yeah. It wasn't fresh. Yeah, we should take a short rest. All right, but okay. In the time while they're resting, underneath the crypts. Yes, yes, Lawrence. I slowly back out.

I walk up the stairs, what the fuck are you doing? We decided to take a break. You couldn't let me know? We didn't want to alert the bad guys of our plans. How were you down there? That's fine, no, it's all nothing, no. I'm not even sure we're in the right place. I can't believe you guys didn't bury

Grandmother down here. Great aunt, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Catherine. Catherine? I thought she was deserving of a proper, natural burial. Our entire family is down here. Not anymore. And does that make it right?

Well, when I die, I want to be buried down here with the others, not in the frickin' woods, haphazardly on a rainy night. I want there to be a big funeral, everyone comes and says things. Half of our family is now running through those woods, dead. Oh yeah. I can see this conversation.

You guys are all sitting against the walls inside the mausoleum with the light of this single sensor flickering in the dark, the wind blowing, and you guys gently bickering like old times. Those sensors, they need to be dealt with. I bury them in the mud so they don't do whatever it is they do. Sure, yeah, you can easily grab one of the,

your great-great-great-great aunt's shield and scoop mud over them. They're dark, too, they're done releasing whatever they were releasing. Thank you. While we have this moment, Lucy, I've always, it's kind of been nagging me. You know, being a holy man, are you allowed to like,

you know, you know. What, what? Come on. Are you allowed to be with like a lady or anything, or do you have to be all chased? Do you not remember the stories our aunt told us? The Moonweaver is the goddess of secret trysts in dark places.

Oh, I forgot that part. He gets a lot of action. A lot of action. Wait. Really? Yes, that happened, that happened. Let her go! Let her go! Oh man, I should have paid more attention. No take backs, no take backs, TJ.

I mean, most of those times that she was giving us those talks, I just painted on a little eye and I just napped out. Whoa, I should have paid more attention. Collecting. Wow. I continue to talk about that for a moment, and then I go back into the other things that Aunt Katerin

told us, as well as our father. I take this opportunity to remind them what it is that we're doing here and why we're here. I use Inspiring Leader. Sweet. I choose my allies, all of them, and they get 10 temporary hit points on top. Oh!

Boom! Awesome. So we're taking a short rest. I'm going to use my hit die to restore to total. You didn't lose. If I didn't lose, I stay. You aren't damaged, you're fine. I stay.

So you're at plus 10. That is great. Super great. Into the end of the day. Are you back to full? Let's check out. I'm back to full. And so wait, now we have extra hit points? Are you back to full? I'm back to full. Okay.

Wait, now we have extra hit points? Plus ten. Wow. Crazy. What do you have? I have an egg. That'll come in handy. Can I?

Yeah. Am I allowed to add an extra ten? I was lost on that. Is that a thing? Oh, I do get an extra ten. So now I can do this thing. I was lost on that. Is that a thing? Oh, I do get an extra 10. So now I can do this thing. Yeah. And it is a clear night. And it is not a full moon, but it is just Shy One.

And you feel it. Waxing. Perhaps it's time for us to continue below. Yes. Say a short prayer to the Moonweaver, and I'll pray for her and give her Guidance. For what?

I don't know, we'll have it for about a minute. Once we start moving. That's cool. For checks. Can we speak to the goddess of the wilderness as well? Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you going to say? What do you need? Our aid.

Oh, yeah. Couldn't hurt. Are we progressing? Let's move forward. Okay, who wants to lead the way? I'll lead the way. I'll join my twin. It is her time now.

Okay, twins. Before we go down there, I'm going to cast the Rite of the Flame on my glaive. Okay. Because Short Rest has lost that. That's right, on my glaive. Okay. Because short rest has lost that. That's right. On my glaive. To glaive.

And it is, Lawrence was the only one who saw this before, once you lower, you descend these marble stairs down to the crypt, it's dark, you're still getting the light of the fire above you, but that trickles to nothing in about 30 or 40 feet. I will pray for light on anything that you want, if you have a shield or a weapon that you would like. Yeah, I'll pull out both of your swords and say.

Moonweaver. Tight. Yeah, I'll pull out both short swords and say, Mm-hmm. Moonweaver. It glows in the dark, and the twins lead the way down this hall, and you've been here many times. You have seen these likenesses of people long since past, some in this century, but the deeper you go, the longer back it goes. And you reach that bend and turn to the right,

and as soon as you turn, something is off, because you have been here at night, even, sneaking out of the back entrance of the keep, stealing your father's key on a lark. And it is always pitch black down here. But right now, at the far end, where you know there is a dead end, is light flickering.

And where the wall is, It's hard to tell. You're a good 150 feet away from it right now. Do you see that light? Yeah. If this elf is worth anything, he's laid some traps before us. I certainly would. You want to go first and check for them,

or do you want me to just do my thing? By all means. How far away is it? 150. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Can I, I will, may I cast Faerie Fire? Oh. Right here where you are?

Mm-hmm. Into the darkness. Into the dark. And you can, absolutely, with the intention to what? Light up the hall? Light up whatever objects are in our path. Well, currently, you can see from the light of his blades that the hall is clear. Okay.

And light gets dimmer and dimmer and dimmer, but you see some flickering at the wall, far in the distance. Nothing's blocking your way. Okay, got it. I'm going to hold that, then. Okay. Holding that in.

I will pick out a copper piece and pray for light on it, and throw it as far as I can comfortably. Oh, interesting, interesting. Okay, yeah, and throw it as far as I can comfortably. Interesting, interesting. Okay, yeah, you throw it about 40 feet and it strikes the stone. You hear it go, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. And you watch as that little light

just slides down the hall. It makes it about halfway there. It's strange, you know at the end of this hallway is where, again, Alphar, the first of the wolves, and his daughter, Grenya, the first to be born a wolf. That's where their bodies rest in shrines to each of them. Monuments, I should say. And your father and Aunt Kat,

before your time, created a small altar at the end of this hall for Genevieve. It's sort of the family, not secret, but shame. The family was ashamed of Geneviève and her leanings and her choices in life and her ferocity. They worried that she would let the secret out.

And just that generation above Katarina, they were very rigid. And they sealed her away. Again, these crypts were built within an already existing cave system that was used, utilized, and built out. And your father told you a couple times, it pained both Hal and Kat, but Genevieve was laid to rest within a cave and sealed inside, never to be seen or to be spoken of.

And where that altar to your grandmother has always been, there's clutter on the ground and there is a hole. So she was untuned alive? No, no, no. She had passed? She was killed. Ah. Outside of the castle grounds. We don't know who did it.

Oh, by perhaps her husband or no. You've heard a couple theories. Right. Cat was always very reluctant to speak of it. It made her very sad, the subject. But there's a hole in front of her crypt. Tomb? It wasn't even a crypt.

I mean, it was just a small statue in her likeness and a small little step that Hal would leave flowers on. And there's rubble there right now. Enough of this. I walk forward. Oh! Lawrence! Stride down the hallway, your siblings watching as you go. I follow. Following as fast as I can.

What is your intention? We're going into the tunnels. It becomes easier to see. The statue of Genevieve is in three separate pieces on the ground, and you are, as you come up, by the light of the coin behind you and your own sword overtaking it, you see two large black iron hammers

lying on the ground here, and you see what you remember as being a very smooth wall of stone ruptured with just rubble lying around, and it's not wide, but a crack leading through. This is something you have never seen before. So a dead end no longer. Correct.

Whoa. I figured as much. Our time has come here. Our road does not end here. Blood on the floor, any signs of struggle? Make an investigation check. It's 18. You take that blade and spend five minutes

carefully checking that hole as you go, but looking along the ground, you don't see any blood. You don't see signs of anything other than the destruction of the stone in front of you, and the desecration of your family's most hallowed ground. Laura. Yes, sister.

Can you smell him? Make a perception check with advantage. Roll it again. Roll it again. Roll it again. I have advantage. Thank you. That's good. 16? 16. The other one was higher, so it was 12 plus. It was a 12. Oh, thank you. Okay, great. Plus seven. 19. You sniff through your canine snout.

You don't smell anything, but your ear, finely tuned, listens and listens, and you do hear... From where? Do you smell breathing? I hear breathing, I do not smell him. Deep head. That way? That way. I'm going.

Going in? Yeah. Sneaking in? Storming in. No, just storming in. Storming in. Storm. Fine, it's okay, I'm out of here. Yes. I have very tiny feet. No, just storming in. Storming in. Going off to find the Queen of Matters. Yes. I have very tiny feet.

Okay. I think we should decide an order. So we have twins in front. Twinsies in front? Yep. Okay. Yin yang. Okay, so the blood hunters leading the way.

Brilliant and idiot. And Orya, who's taking the rear? I'll take the rear. Okay, and are we one wolf and four humans? For now. For now, good. Okay, so. Are you going to wolf out?

Not yet. I don't know, I mean, is it close? We can hear them breathing. If we can hear them breathing, they're close. I just don't want to waste it. You folks have always been afraid of your darkness. The way beyond control. I go, I'm going to go wolf.

You're going wolf? Okay, so your arms, your shoulders, your biceps swell. You start to reach the size of the twins and pass it just a little bit. Why don't you tell us how you look in your olden form? Okay, I resemble the way my hair is, so I'm all black fur on top, and my underside is all stark white.

Ooh. Kind of like a river skunk. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Still holding that blade in your hand, stalking forward. And I'm clutching his ring around my neck.

Okay. Which, it was a long chain, so it's not strangling me or anything. That's fine. Okay, so two wolves, three men. Who has that? Elven blade? I do.

Is it in your hand? I just have it in my belt. Would you like to see it? Can I see it? Yes, of course. I can read elven, what does this say? The dagger that was found inside. What was it? Silent. Silent message. Silent message.

Kind of like a whisper. Is this an elven blade? Yeah, it has got elven language carved on it. Well, it has elven language carved on it. Silent Message. Does it mean anything to me? Make a history check. I pray.

Yeah. Yeah. Pray, pray. You got to pray. 18. 18? You've read a fair amount, not as much as your brother. You've read about... And I'll discuss this with him, because he's smarter than I am. Thank you.

Then roll again at advantage. He only thinks he's smarter than you. Yes, because I read. No, it's not as good. Not as good. You've read similar names in histories that touch on the nation of Xhorhas. Our enemy nation? That is correct. Country to the east. I mention this to everyone?

Okay. It doesn't strike any chords, though, beyond that. No, no. I hand the thing back to you. Where did we find this blade? It was in Aura's room, it was in a bag. In this couch with the familiar smell. It's just a thing.

Guys, you're making too much of it. There's just some bad guys out there, we're going to kill them, then we're going to have the party that I was promised. What? Katherine was murdered. Our father has lost a hand and has been taken. The elves are an ancient people and they know magic well.

If this is true, then they perhaps know that this dagger is coming to them. They know when and they know where, perhaps. You want to get rid of it? I don't know, we might need it. Huh. So we're pausing at this crack in the wall, I assume. I don't know. We might need it. Huh. So we're pausing at this crack in the wall.

Yeah, we're going in, we're budging in. Oh god, she's freaking out. It's not that far. What starts, where did I lose my place here? It starts out as sort of structured excavation. You can tell that this was dug out at some point, what lays beyond this cask of Amontillado-type wall. But it quickly gives way to natural formations

opening into a substantial chamber ahead. It's a cave, and there are two torches at the far end of it flickering. The cave bisects, though, not that far in front of you, and it seems to split. As it opens up, there is a passage on your right, but your eyes are more drawn, very obviously, very clearly,

to the far end where those torches burn, and a tumble of stone leads up to a slightly higher ledge, and you see a figure standing there, staring at you all as you enter. Do we recognize him? Her? Them? Make a insight check. Can we do this as well?

You can, you both can. 13. 14. Okay, he... As you draw a little bit closer, he is familiar. He is familiar. He is familiar. He's slender, youthful looking, dark, almost blue-hued skin.

Of course, sharp ears, sharp expression. The sides of his head are shorn and there is a shock of white hair tied back. He is staring at you and you right now. He's wearing dark oiled scale mail with a single chitinous pauldron on one shoulder. And in his hand, there's a cruel-looking flail. His jagged edges are currently trailing down and wrapping around the neck of your father, who is lying at his feet, breathing slowly.

He's about 100 feet away from you. 100 feet away from us? And he is just deadpan staring at you all. I think I'm going to wolf out. Okay. Can I pray while we're seeing this? Yes, but for the moment. Big man, what's your name, Chet? Tell me.

Chet Benicio. What do you look like in your willow form? My arms from prior burning don't really have a lot of fur on them. They're mostly scar tissue and skin. So it looks like little human arms? Well, they're bigger. They definitely get stronger tissue and skin. So it looks like little human arms? Well, they're bigger. They definitely get stronger and ropeier. No, they definitely look like human arms.

Yeah. And then the rest of me is, you know black and white cookies? Yeah. So mostly white on this half, mostly black on this half. Got it, got it, nice. And that's that.

Okay. Real matted and nasty. So that's Benicio Lawrence. Yeah, as I start to hulk out, I grab the peppered sides of my hair, and I pull and split my face, and the whole maw comes out of it, and my head is jet black with white racing stripes

coming back from my eyes, but the black only extends to my mid-sternum where the rest of my body is peppered salt, salty gray, black and white, and dappled spots. That's cool. Keg is aroused. I instinctively just sniff him all over the place. Nop and nuss, nop and nuss.

The twins go bro-tastic. One second. Lucius, you wanted to say a prayer, you said? Faerie fire. What's the range? 90 feet? 60. He's a little too far away where you guys are right now.

Good enough, I'll wait. Okay. Can we start running towards him? You want to charge? I want to fucking charge him. Fucking charge him. Wolf charge. Yeah, whose charge is he going to be charging with me? Yeah.

Ooh! Okay. Fuck, roll for initiative. Yeah! Ooh! Okay. Fuck, roll for initiative. Yeah! Bring it on out, Max, are you there? Holy cow. In spite of the prayers, since I couldn't do it, can I throw the coin, the light coin, to the right?

I just don't want that dark area. Yes, you can. Ting ting ting. Whoa! Okay, this is heavy. This is a giant map. Oh, I love it. Oh, oh no.

Earthquake, earthquake. That goes there, that goes there, that goes there. Where are we? Okay. Oh, we went through the hole? No, what? Okay. Wow.

Okay, here is, where are we all? That's dumb. Okay, at this point then, you're here. Who's that? Oh, the twins were in front, so it is black and red. My arms! I say there. We still have weapons and stuff, right? Yeah.

You're still in your human form, though, yes? Yes. Okay, and? Why? I mean, you can, but I'm pretty dope without it, I think. Where am I missing? Oh, here we are. I think you can do three attacks with your claws and two attacks with your hands. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

One second, everybody. What are you going to do? You've got a thing? She's got a thing. How far away from him are we now? I'm going to say at this moment in time, in the lead, five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40, 45, I'm going to put him at 50 feet.

Woo-hoo! And so, did you all roll for initiative? Yeah. Yes. Okay, so, and let me roll for him. He is at, where's my stuff? Sorry, I did not think we were going to launch into that quite this round. That's fine.

That's great. No, no, no, no, not at all. Okay, so who got 20 to 25? 23. 23. Whoa. Portia in the lead again. 20 for me. 20 for you. Benicio is second place again.

For me. Lawrence. The exact same order so far. Okay, that's right. Where are they? Okay. Okay, after Lawrence, what are your two rolls? I rolled a 19.

Yeah. 13. 13. One. What the fuck? I'm going to leave you, I'm going to leave a big. Well, you're not a wolf. Lucius, I'm going to leave a big gap. Well, you're not a wolf. Lucius, I'm going to leave a big gap right here. It's the same exact order as last time. Oh my god.

You threw a coin and it landed about here, I'll say. Okay. All right, Portia, you are up. Just to remind you what you're looking at, you're looking at a dark elf with a flail that is wrapped around your father's neck. Oh god. It could kill Dad. Oh god. I'm gonna, oh god. Where'd the music go, Mercer?

Do I, can I, I can only hold an action, I can't hold a whole move. You can only hold an action, I can't hold a whole move. You can only hold an action. But can I let somebody go before me, before I go? You can't pass. No, you can't pass. You would lose until the next time around. Okay, which one am I?

You're the wolf. So I color coded you guys, okay? So Benicio is black, Lawrence is red, Portia is blue, Lucius is yellow, and Aura is green. Okay. And how far away is Benny from the baddie? About 50 feet. Okay, I'm going to run forward to Benicio.

Yeah! Okay, okay, 10, 15. And I'm going to bonus action, Shared Passage. What's that, what's that? That's the one where I can teleport 40 feet. What? I'm going to teleport 40 feet, and then I'm going to run the last little bit up

to an attacker. Okay. Okay. And I'm going to bring Benny with me. You can bring a person with you? I bring somebody with me my size. Oh man, this is why I said I didn't want this. So five, 10, by the way, I told you guys this before, but I'll tell the audience,

I have no idea how to balance combat, so I don't really know what's going to happen. Yeah! Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35. So we'll bamf to the end of the steps. I'm going to say yeah. And then I'll run up the rest. Okay.

And attack him. Whoo! Oh my god. All right, what are you going to do? I'm going to... Preach nasty. Oh man. I'm going to hit him twice. Go for it. With this sword. Go for it. I'm going to do? Pretty nasty. Oh man. I'm going to hit him twice with this sword.

Go for it. I'm going to try to. Yeah. Okay, okay. 15 plus nine. Are you crimson right in that sword? No, because I already bonus action to teleport. 15 plus nine, you said?

Definitely hits. Okay. Why does the music keep turning off, Mercer? 13 points on the first hit. Okay. Wow. Holy shnikes. Oh, natural one for the second.

Okay, I'm going to say on that set, okay, so hold on a second. So. We're winning here, right? We're winning. I'm happy. We could die, it'd be fine. So... We're winning here, right? So, the two wolves just disappear, running, and one of them just continues to Naruto run up the hill. Comes forward with Vargas and stabs straight into the drow. He is bewildered that it has happened,

that you're on him so quickly, and then you pull out to strike again, but your foot slides on some of the stones. It's just a pile of loose rubble up to this ledge, and you go tumbling backwards and fall prone. Oh, natural one really fucked me there. You take three points of bludgeoning damage as you strike your shoulder hard into the stony ground. Benicio, it is your turn. I will run up the stairs. First of all, I'll be like, how the fuck did I get here?

Then I'll run up the stairs with fury in my eyes. And I'm going to grab Dad and pull him. You're going to pull him? I'm going to pull Dad. I'm going to grab Dad and try to pull him away. Okay, make a strength check. Oh no, but if the guy can hit him

and he'll get an attack of advantage or whatever. Strength check? Do I get more strength? You have advantage on your strength checks. Straight, strong. Yeah, as a werewolf, that's correct. Play us your music again. I guess this is the one that doesn't.

Does strength go up? No, just plus one to your melee damage. Okay, 15. 15, that's fine. You yank your father away from the man, and the barbed edges of the flail tear into his throat. Nice. And he ragdolls away and you hear a brief

and he collapses onto the stone in front of you and is bleeding onto your feet. No! Lovely. What did you do? I will use the form again. Do I have him? Or is he still wrapped up? He is still, yeah, it was laced.

You have him, and the flail is free. It wasn't tied in a knot, it was just methodically wrapped around, and you have just unraveled it like a ripcord. Oh. Father. Benicio, stop! No one look at me. I'm going to just keep dragging him down the stairs. Okay.

Serious? In my prone self, I just see like, death. He is going to take a swipe at you with the flail as you back up. This is what happens when you take Benicio instead of Lawrence, all right? You took the Jughead. to take a swipe at you with the flail as you back up. This is what happens when you take Benicio instead of Lawrence, all right? You took the Jughead.

He had my back in the cemetery. Oh, what's your, oh, I know what it is. It is 17. Yeah, you feel those same jagged edges on the flail rake across your own hairy chest. You take five points of piercing damage

and... Oh no. And 15 points of poison damage from that. Wait, the piercing damage is halved. Okay. It is. Because I'm a werewolf. So it's only two points of, or three points? Two, we'll say two. Okay, plus 15 points.

Oh! And you are poisoned. Well, actually, make a constitution save. Poisoned because? Constitution save 19. Okay. You feel burning inside the veins inside your body. Your chest just starts to burn, and you just

roar. Benicio roars in this cave and you withstand the poison. By Troll-o-Loli. Oh, your poor voice. Yeah. And you wanted to back up a bit, right? So I can say you get back down to the bottom of the hill, but he looks flummoxed, let's say, the dark elf.

All right, anything else? You're out of juice, right? Lawrence, you're up. Does our speed increase as werewolves? No, it doesn't, does it? No. So my fucking siblings just disappear, and I'm like, uh-oh. Yeah.

And watching all that happen in two six-second back-to-back periods, and not being able to close the distance of 30 feet, I will run into that cove. Okay. Five, 10, 15, 20, is where you want to be? Yeah, and with my bonus action, I will cast Crimson Rite on my claws. Awesome, great.

So you take 1d6 damage outright? I believe so. Or not 1d6, just 6. It's just 6 total, yeah. And what are you imbuing them with? Lightning damage. Lightning, saucy. Okay. Always the weakling coward, Lawrence. Hiding in a cove.

Shut up! I went in and killed Dad like a real brave guy. The sister helped you. Oh, my god. You didn't even know what happened. You just showed up there. I saw it in your face. I saw it in your face.

Okay, so next up is this stranger. Oh, and see, you've got dad down here. And he shouts out, Kill them! Oh no. And he backs up and crouches a bit behind this broken stone box. And he mutters something quietly behind and you all watch as a dark, glowing,

bluish-purple, jagged spear appears above his head and starts to angle towards you all. What is that? What is that? Not good. No, I think it's fine. above his head and starts to angle towards you all. What is that? What is that? Not good. No, I think it's fine. Yeah. Is this part of the party?

I got to look something up, I got to look something up, but next up is Orya, so Orya, I'll be thinking what you want to do really quick. Yes, sir. I'll be right with you. Our father is dying. Thanks to who? Or dead, so if there's any way to know. I'm going to slightly adjust the description of that. That jagged spear appears floating right in front of you,

Benicio, and on its own just goes and shudders towards you. That spear is your weapon. And you crouch down and cower, not cower, but protect your father's body, and the spear strikes the stone just behind you and then retracts up into the air and just sort of quivers in the air above you. Now, Orya, you're up.

So the spear is still aimed at my brother? Sphere, yeah. Sphere, thank you. So I would like to use haste to get to him. So you're going to cast haste on yourself, you're saying? I'm going to cast haste on myself, yes. Okay. All right, you do that. No, you don't need to roll at all.

The hair all over your body starts to prickle and stand on end, and you feel your tendons just twist and tighten, and you are now the fastest wolf on earth. Yes. Seriously. So where are we going? So I'm going to the Benicio, yep.

50 here, or where? Because you've got some more left. You've got maybe 10 more. You've got two more squares, 10 more feet. I want to be right up on him. Well, you are on Benicio. Am I on him? Where's my father in this scenario? On the other side of Benicio.

Could you get between him and Elspir? And then, wait, who's between me and that's me? I'm going to say no you can't. I'm going to say that they're in a pile. We've got brother, sister, father all in a little heap here, because you're on your back, dad's not good,

and you're sort of standing but crashing over him. Elspir has missed him. Yes. Right. Save Dad. Don't forget, your AC is now higher because of that, so you're harder to hit. Um. Seize time. Don't forget, your AC is now higher because of that, so you're harder to hit. Right. And you have an extra action,

which you could use to move, if you wanted to go further. Spell. Erika, if you wanted to go further, you could use. I want to go to my father. Okay. So. So maybe get in front of him, or? Yes, in front of him.

So here, yeah, definitely if you use your hasted action, which you now have, to stand in as well you are now. One additional action. No, that's the. The haste, that's it. So she used her double movement to get where she was. Oh, you've got so much to do. You used your doubled movement to get that far.

You just used your action or your hasted action to get even further. You have an action left. But her action originally was to cast haste. To cast haste. You're right. Yep. So now I don't.

Double movement. 600 healing. Action, double movement. Action, action, action, bonus action. Hey Vax. You are done. You are in fact done. Unless you had something that was more.

Bonus action. Bonus action? Bonus action, healing. Oh wait, are done, you are in fact done. Unless you had something that was a bonus action. Bonus action? Bonus action healing. Wait, action, oh! She has healing word. I do have healing word. Is that a bonus action? It is a bonus action.

Yeah, then you can do that. Is it another spell though? You can't do two spells in one turn. Matt usually lets us do healing word. It's a level one, I don't know, does that make a difference? Yeah, it was like level one or below. If you cast a higher level spell for your action, you can use a level one.

I'm going to use a rule called Fuck It. I'm going to use the Fuck It rule, Healing Word. Healing Word, then, on my father. If ever there was a moment, it is now. I'm Healing Wording my father. Okay, so the wording on the spell is it's 1d4, I think? It's 1d4, yeah, plus my spellcasting ability modifier. Which is wisdom.

Okay. So roll the pyramid, plus, nope, not that one, the pyramid. No pyramid, thank you. One plus four. Plus four, all right. Okay, but the holes that were raked across your father's neck close, and the bleeding stops, and he goes,

Stop! That is the end of your turn. Going down right here, I don't know. Lucius, it is your turn. Was I? Yes. Come on. I'm going to press myself against that wall, just in case whoever he said kill them to comes flying around the corner.

I don't want them to see me. Okay. I reach out and throw silence on the area where he is. Oh, nice. Okay, so this whole back chamber, done and done. Nice. Oh shit. Okay, and that's the end of your turn? It is. Okay, then.

Perceive the area, because I want to know what's coming for us. Okay, all of you, from off on your right, suddenly hear what sounds like thick metal being dragged along stone, and from, you didn't focus on it before, but from out of a deep recess in the wall, dark with shadow steps a ghastly,

maybe 10-foot-tall figure of darkened bone, brown, almost black, a tatter of decaying robes in a faded ghost of the traditional Lorelei green, drapes around its scraping, lumbering hips. A massive canine skull stares at you, its eye sockets seeping black, inky horror. A jawbone of ragged teeth widened beyond comprehension. Black mist or smoke spilling out in place of a tongue,

long since rotted away. I'm so excited right now. I feel roused. Siblings, meet your grandmother. Oh, grandma! What fucking gnarly teeth you have. So, Leo. Yes.

If we can't hear, did we see that happen? It's just in the early half. The silence is here. Did we see that happen? It's just in the early half. The silence is here. And she is going to use her action to get closer. Oh no. 5, 10, 15. I flatten myself against the wall. No!

I'm not! I'm not! 25. Oh my. And her head just stretches down at the two of you. But for now, it is your turn, Portia.

Holy shit. Okay. Kill Grandma! I just wrote Grandma in the initiative order. Oh god, okay. Oh yeah, where is she in the initiative order? from the ground, I'm going to, oh god. No, wrong character. She slipped into the jester.

Wrong character. Sorry. Oh jeez. Technically, I would like to turn into a wolf right now. Okay. Okay. I'm going to... I'm going to, because I'm going to, on the ground,

I guess I'm going to Crimson Rite. Sure. Myself. Your clawsies. I mean, are my claws, okay. They're a weapon, absolutely. But are they as good as my sword, though? Like, how much damage do they do?

1d6. Well, I will say this, technically, technically, in your werewolf form, at your level, you can, as an action, attack attack with claws, and with a bonus action, attack. So you got three claws, whereas if you use your sword, it's just sword swipe, sword swipe, done.

But my sword does more damage. What damage does your sword do? 1d... Eight. Let's do the math on this combat. 1d10, it says? Why does it say 1d10 plus four under it? With claws, you're going to get 3d6 plus five. No, 3d6 plus 15.

Yeah. Versus 2d10. Three chances to hit. So that's good. Ranked up with Crimson Rite. Besides, you're a fucking werewolf. But also do what feels right. Just get feral, Lara.

I'm just going to attack her with my claws. I'm going to write a passage on my claws. Which is the bonus action? Bonus action. So this time you get two claw swipes because you used the bonus action to do it. So you take six points of damage from firing. What are you imbuing your claws with?

Storm damage as well! Lightning. Lightning damage. Okay, roll. I'm going to stand up. Okay. So you use half your movement to stand. I never anticipate. As I stand, I'm just going to slash. Undead. Grandma Werewolf. Slash her.

Protect your father, protect your family line. 14 plus seven? Hits. Okay. Does an undead werewolf have resistance against slashing? Why don't you roll both your attacks first to see how they hit. 12 plus seven, 19.

19 just hits. Okay. Okay. So then it's what plus, what do I roll? Uh. A d6? A d6. Plus a d6. My gosh, I don't have it in front of me.

Oh, because you don't have your shit. What do you mean? You don't have your character sheet in front of you, right? No, I do, I do. Oh, you got it? Yeah, it's just an unarmed strike? It's an unarmed strike, but it's 1d6 as a werewolf claw. You had told us in an email that she gets 1d6 plus five

and we get 1d6 plus four. Because of her strength modifier, right? So 1d6 plus five, your strength modifier, plus your lightning damage. Okay, cool, cool, cool. Okay. Ooh, 10 plus fives, 15 on first attack. But some of that, she must have resistance, too.

We're going to find out. And then 11 on the second one. Okay. Math. Math-is. This is the worst part. What's Math-is? Maths. Math-is?

Okay. Johnny Maths. Uh. We're on you, Benicio. Oh no, I'm sorry. She's going to use one of- Can I stand up? Can I? I'm standing.

Yeah. Can I stand up? Oh, sure, stand your mini up, yes. Yes. Okay. Yes. Shoot. Okay.

She is going to use one of her legendary actions to slash the shit out of Portia. Oh no. And does hit, and you take... What does she roll? I have 17 AC. She got a 19. Damn it.

Eight. You take 13 points of slashing damage from Genevieve Lorelei. Genevieve is one of my favorite names to use. Reduced to seven? You're a werewolf. Oh, so I have resistance. Slashing and piercing and bludgeoning is reduced by half. Okay. That's nice. So wait, you said 13?

And I've added her to the playing field. Yeah, and her claws aren't considered magical. Iron Woe? What does that even mean? No, it's not woe, it's iron ho. Oh. Whoa. Which makes iron woo.

All the same. All the same. So that is, we're done there. Now we are on to Benicio. Yes. Benicio. Yeah. I attack grandma.

Go for it. Yeah, with glaive action. Ooh, that's no good. That's only 15 to hit. She strikes it out of the way. Oh no! That's a coup. Meemaw?

There is just a seeping, bleeding black cloud pouring out of her eyes and mouth as she stares down at you. So used to staring down at others, and she is so much bigger than you. Attack again. Grandma, let's start it. 21.

Hit. Yeah. Okay, that is eight, 13 points of damage. I don't know how much of that she actually takes. Five points of those are fire damage, and eight of them are slashing. Got it. And then with my bonus action,

since I'm a polearm master, I will hit her with the back of the weapon as well. Is that a bonus? It's a bonus attack. Fun, fun, fun. Which, oh, it's only 16 to hit. Okay. Fail. Yeah, she, fun. Which, it's only 16 to hit. Okay. Fail. Yeah.

She claws it out of the air and goes to roar in your face and you hear, Why? Not a full roar, but unsettling enough. Anything else? That's all I have. Movement, Laura? Oh no, I'll stay put. Lawrence.

Yeah, I'll run into the fray. 30 feet. Five, 10, 15, 20. You want to come up behind her? Yeah. Or you could flank her. Flank, please, yes. I'll take all three claw attacks. All at advantage.

All at advantage? Yeah. Natural 20 for the first one. Ooh! Second one is a 24. Fits. And that one is also a 24. Oh my goodness. Yeah!

That's really amazing rolls. I really should have grabbed Lawrence. Yeah, so I'll do the non-crits first. So three, seven, and four is 11 points on the first one, including the lightning damage. One, four, five, and four is nine. Okay. Did you crit yourself on the first one? No, I'm doing it

for now. So that's five, 10. Contact her with advantage? No, he's flanking. Oh, okay. 14, 13, 17 points with lightning damage on the crit. Ooh! Okay, so Lawrence comes running up, arms behind him,

and leaps on the back of his grandmother and just tears. And the bone does not feel like bone. It feels like petrified wood. It feels like on the verge of stone, but you just drag your claws down and pull. It's like sparks coming out from under your claws as you, her bones are hardened and heavy, and not what you expected.

Almost like iron. Whoa! Okay, it is the dark elf's turn. Yeah, one sec, one sec, one sec. I got to look something up, I got to look something up. Got to do it. No, you don't. Yes, I do. He does, he's doing the things. I'm doing all the things. Just make it up.

No, I can't make this one up. You can't do it. So, check out that store, Kru, Kru, Kru, shop, shop.kru.com? Is that what it is? Guys, end of the night tonight, acrobatics check. Get some swag. Great, it's a must.

We have extra toilet paper to hand out. Yeah. By swag, we mean red bots. They're not Twizzlers. They're probably Costco third party brand red bots. Kirkland brand red bots. The thin and ropey dark elf runs out of this upper chamber,

leaps down and drops down by aura on the ground. Okay. And he gets as low as he can in a squat, and you hear. Oh no. You don't see him anymore. Oh shit. He got out of the silence.

Hmm. Oh, that's what you were looking at. Yes. No. If it was a verbal spell. Okay. Oh boy, we're in it now, guys. Okay, the iron woe is going to

whip around. The iron woe. The iron woe. to whip around the iron wall. Turning towards the grandchild who just hurt her so badly. And she is going to rake her claw against you, Lawrence. For 22. Oh, that's good.

22, so you take 12 points of slashing damage, and then she- Because her claws aren't magical? Or are they silvered or magical? They're magical. Okay, 12 points, got it. And then she, that giant, gaping, hanging, lolling mouth lunges down, and your AC is what again?

16. Snaps just shy of your face. Yeah, you yank back at the last second, almost lose your footing, almost do that whoa, whoa, whoa thing, but stay up. You gonna barf? You gonna barf? Breathe Are you going to barf? Bravely.

Are you going to barf? I don't barf at all. She just snorts through her nose or the holes in the skull and a big poof of in your face. It clings to you for a second and it dissipates. What was that? Now it is Ara's turn.

Come on, Ara. Oh, I'm going to retroactively do something, too. The spear is still floating in the air, and it flies in an arc over, and I'm going to say it goes in a circle and strikes into Portia. Me too! Oh god. That is...

That is a 22. That hits me. Okay, and that is, I really got to write this down. Poor Portia. You might die. I might. You might straight up die. That has six points of damage.

Ugh, but that's, oh, it is magical. Necrotic damage, yeah. At the start of our turn, those of us in wolf form, we got to do that wisdom check. Oh, we all took damage. Yeah, who all took damage? I think I took damage. You took damage. At the start of your turn, if you've taken damage, yeah.

Yeah, you three have to roll to see if you keep control of yourselves. Oh shit. That's right. How do we know what's going to? We'll get to that. At the top of your turn, right? Keep control of yourselves. Oh shit. That's right. How do we know what's going to? We'll get to that. So, Aura, it is your turn at that. You have to know how much damage you took, too.

Uh-huh. 12, 15, okay, so for me it's going to be 10. It's a DC of 10 or half the damage you took. Where am I relative to Portia right now? Because do we know, where am I relative to Portia? Oh, the green, you're here. I'm up there, right, and where is she? right now. Where am I relative to Portia? Oh, the green here. I'm up there, right? And where is she?

Portia is here. Is there, okay. Did I take six points from that spear? Also, Aura, I should say this, too. The dark elf landed right next to you and then almost instantaneously went and vanished next to you, but you felt a bump or a brush against your shoulder.

You felt momentum running past you, and you can tell that he's running past you right now. You get what's called an attack of opportunity. It's a disadvantage because he's fucking invisible, but roll to see if you can swipe that. And by attack, it's a physical attack, like you hit, not with a spell. Yeah, not a spell.

So to see if I can somehow hit him, despite the fact that he's fleeing. Well, you just go. So if you are quick enough, so you roll twice and pick the lower. The lower disadvantage. Okay. That's a four. Plus... Wait, what am I doing? What is the thing?

Plus five. It's nine. You feel a hint of fabric on the edges of your claw, and then nothing. Okay, now it's your full-on turn, so forget that. How badly are you injured again? Are you near death? What is going on? and then nothing. Okay, now it's your full-on turn, so forget that. How badly are you injured again? Are you near death? What is going on? No, no, no. To do your thing.

Do the thing, do the other things. I'm going to do the other things. One point's a famine, then you're dead. On and around my face. This is your moment, I'm not giving it to you. I'm not, no, coming over there. I'm not doing it. I'm going to transform into a dire wolf.

Oh! Super Saiyan 2! You're already a wolf wolf. You can't be a double wolf. I got three wolves! There's another wolf? There's one more wolf past this? Aura just keels forward and lands on all fours and her hands plant, and you watch as those hands just expand and grow, and her back lengthens and broadens and turns into this gigantic ridge, and a pony-to-horse-sized wolf is standing there.

Oh no! That's a big wolf. I did not know she could do that. That was your bonus action. Yeah, that's your bonus action. That's your bonus action. So you can still attack like that? You can still attack.

So I can, okay. Kill her! But is it two separate actions for me to run at the iron woe? You have movement and an action, so you can move towards the iron woe. I want to run at the iron woe, and I want, can I physically connect with the iron woe? Could I attempt to knock the iron woe over?

You can totally get around it. I want to attempt to leap on and pin the iron woe. Sure. What I want to do as my dire warden. Okay, so yeah, make a strength check. Yep. A disadvantage as a value. All right, 15. Disadvantage.

Yeah. No opposable thumbs. Eight. And strength, strength, strength. Don't tell me, don't do the things. Where am I? I'm looking at my things and not getting it. Okay. 10. 10. You do run up and your claws drag down

the bones of her back, but she is able to pivot and take the momentum of you and shove you off of her. Just kill her aura! You don't have a lot of flexibility and mobility. You're not really a ninja in this shape. You are a powerhouse. We'll say that's the end of your turn.

No, it's not. She's hasted. Oh, she's hasted. Oh, she's hasted. Oh! Shit! I get to steal and beat him! Oh, it lasts for a minute, so 10 rounds. So we're stealing. You have another action. All of the maiming.

Yeah, so you can bite. So can I, can I? Bite her! You can no longer cast spells, though. I can't, so I can I, uh. Can I, uh. Bite her face off. Yeah, can I, I'm going to bite her neck. Okay. I can't, so I quit. Not in this shape. Can I? Bite her face off. Yeah, I'm going to bite her neck.

Okay, go for it, roll an attack. Go and bite her neck. Yes! That's plus five to whatever you roll. Because it's dire wolf. Oh god, okay, that's nine. Okay, you leap and try to snap at her face and she is so tall, she just rears back a bit

and you and fall down. And hold your ground. I like that we're surrounding her, though. Lucius. Lucius. Lucius is your husband. I would like to back up, because she's terrifying. So is she.

Yeah, yeah. A lot of shit going on in that area. I am sorry, Grandmother. But this may hurt. Let us pray. This is great. Moonbeam. Moonbeam?

Okay. Moonbeam is a tricky thing. It's my son's favorite spell, and there's a lot of debate on how, but you have been doing this for 30 years, so. I always, when I first started navigating Moonbeam, I thought that when you cast it, the damage happened immediately, but I've seen a lot of debate about this, and what generally people say is that it's when the Moonbeam moves onto you, or at the start of your turn, but not when you throw it on somebody else.

So, meaning you would dump the moonbeam on Grandma, and then as soon as her turn started, that's when the damage would take effect. I don't know why that would matter one way or another, for simplicity and bookkeeping. Yeah, let's just do it now. Yeah, because it's just easier. It sounds dumb, because her turn is so far away. Let's just do it now. Yeah, because it's just easier. Because her turn is so far away.

Let's just nuke her. Okay. So she has to, she has to. I don't know whether that's why you're gonna take no fucking damage. She has to make a save. I hear you, but also. Right?

Yes, please. And it is? Versus 15, save Con. Constitution. Versus 15. She doesn. Constitution. Versus 15. She doesn't look too healthy. She makes it. Of course she does.

All the 19. What the? She's a strong, but she takes half damage. She takes half. And the damage is? 2d10. 2d10, okay. I got papers everywhere.

14 points of damage, full, so half of that. Got it. I don't know if this matters, there's extra information. Yeah. First off, she's hit by the Mark of Waning, because this is radiant damage, so her speed is halved, and she has disadvantage on strength ability checks. Cool.

Also, a shape changer that makes a saving throw with disadvantage, is she a shape changer? I would say she's not anymore. Okay, good to know. And life. Because she's stuck in that form. That's it, yeah. Teejee's notes are color code.

I mean, Teejee's got like... The fucking doctor is in over here. This is so information. He's schooling us. Yeah. All right. Is that the end of your turn? It is. Oh, I moved, yes. Okay.

And I press myself against the wall. The iron woe is going to use a different legendary action. Ah! She curls her shoulders forward and that black, inky substance, whatever it was, starts to expand out from around her and envelop you all.

I need all of you to make a wisdom save. Oh no. Where's your wisdom at? Where's your wisdom at, sister? What one of us saved? These are saving throws up here. I see. Oh, you don't got a really good wisdom.

No, I got good wisdom. Four. Four? Yeah. So, I'm over there. Doop, doop, doop. Yeah, all of you, yeah. Four, natural 20. Natural 20?

Nice! 12. 12. 15. 15. All right, Lawrence, Aura, you feel sick to your stomach. You feel anger and pain and sorrow

radiating off the expired body of your grandmother. You feel loss. You feel confusion. You have to get out of here. Oh no. You have to get away of here. Oh no. You have to get away from her. Now. Fuck.

You two are frightened. Can I use my reaction to give them a second? Oh, shit. It's a moon thing. What's the reaction? Luminous clarity. I can shine a light into the darkest moments, shielding it from alien influence.

When a creature within 30 feet that I can see makes a wisdom saving throw, you can use reaction to grant them advantage on the roll. You can. Oh! Just one creature, or one creature? Is it one creature? It's one creature. One right now, yeah.

I can do it again if you don't run too far. Which one, which? No, I mean, I think it's in react, you get one reaction around, and this is's in react, you get one reaction a round, and this is the reaction, so you pick one person. Who's reacting? Who do I see? Aura and Lawrence. Aura.

Oh! So, roll again. Wait, what am I rolling for? Just roll that d20. You get another chance. Ooh, yes! And it's a way better one. Okay, what am I rolling for? Just roll that d20. You get another chance. Ooh, yes! And it's a way better one. Okay, and this is which?

Plus wisdom save. Wisdom save, okay. Oh, yeah. I'm just rolling a bit. She's okay. 24. 24. 24.

Aura, that terror does overwhelm you, and the second before you turn to scrabble away, you hear a young, feminine voice in your ear say, Stand. And the fear abates, and you breathe a giant beast of a wolf and snarl at your grandmother, not so for Lawrence. Also... Never mind. Portia, I need you to make a check to see if you control yourself right now. Okay, so...

So you need to roll a... Are you gonna 10? Saving throw. I'm gonna, since we can't remember, neither you or I... It was 12 damage, so... It's 10. It's a 10. There's no. I'm gonna, since we can't remember neither you or I. It was like, it was 12 damage, so. It's 10, it's a 10. There's no way she took more than 21.

You're right, you're right, so 10. So you gotta beat. So I roll a d20 and get higher than a 10. 10, yeah. Oh god. Oh no. 10! That's it.

How high or? Hold on one second. Higher of 10 or half the. 10! That's it. That'll hire. Hold on one second. Hire a 10 or half the. You have to hit 10. Okay. Ugh! Okay. Oh, there's not much.

It's a wisdom save, so if you have any wisdom bonus, that'll get you over the hump, too. Oh, we'll get it. So you're fine. So you're fine. So you're in control. You feel from the pain you took, your blood is just boiling,

and you want to fuck something up, but you realize what it is you have to fuck up. I'm going to fuck up that iron wolf. Ooh, the iron woof. And it's your turn. Oh! Which is why you made that save. Go for it.

Come on, come on, come on. I got to see what I got to see when I'm at a bonus action. Okay, I'm just going to do it. Attack her. I'm going to attack her. Also do any of your curses. I know, but... I've looked and one is a reaction.

I just need to remember it. Sure. 11 on the first, oh wait, I should probably roll to see if it hits, I'm dumb. Natural 20! Ooh! Do I roll my dice again or just use what I just rolled? Six plus double, that's 12 plus five is 17 on the first hit.

Ooh. Okay. 18, natural, wait, natural 16 on the second one, so that hits again. 10 plus five, 15 on the second hit. Third swipe. So a 17, 15? 17 and 15. 17 and 15. Okay, 17, 15? 17 and 15. 17 and 15. Okay, 17, 15.

And then 13 plus six, 19. That hits again? Yep. These are all with your claws? These are my claws! Yes. How do you do 40 points of damage with crit on that first one?

Oh no, no, no, no, I didn't do, that last one was to see if it hits. This last one is only eight points of damage with crit on that first one? Oh no, no, no, no, I didn't do, that last one was to see if it hits. This last one is only eight points of damage. Oh, okay. 40 points total. Crazy. Is it 40 points total? I lost track of that. 12.

It was 17, 15. And eight. And eight? Oh, wait. How do you get 15 from 1d6 plus five? It's a 1d6 plus the right of, 1d6 plus five. It's a one d6 plus the right of... One d6 plus five. Oh, you get the right of the thing, too! Plus the right, yeah.

Oh shit! Yeah. That's beastly. Yes, yes. Wait, plus strength? It's like one d6. The plus five to your attack. Yeah, yeah, the plus five's already worked.

Okay, okay, okay. You already got that in. That's your modifier. Habada, habada, habada, habada. Okay, so do you want to move anywhere? Oh, she'll get a swipe at me, but no. Yeah, okay, I'm going to back up. No, fuck it, I'm going to stand there.

Fuck it. Okay. Fuck it. Okay. P-H-U-C-K. Benicio, you're up. I will roll. I rolled a 11 to maintain my calm demeanor. Okay.

And now I will attack. Glaive out. Natural 20. Ooh! So that's...hold in. What do I double? Your hit dice. The dice, just the dice. Just this. Not the modifier. Not the plus anything. The dice you roll. All the dice. Yeah, all the dice.

Whoa, okay. That's a nine, so that's 18 plus three is 21. Okay. That's 10. Plus 10? You double that, too. I double this, too? Any die you roll, you double. Whoa, okay, 31 points of damage.

The first attack. A lot of that is slashing and stuff, though. I don't know if that affects anything. Attack number two! Oh god. No, 18. Because you're slashing. Does not hit.

No? It's your glaive or your claw? Oh, well, it's imbued with the Rite of the Flame, I don't know. That's a magical weapon. Yeah, it's magical. Who is she facing? Me! You fucking dick.

Does the position give them any advantage to hit? That's right, we're all flanking. Only one person is flanking, and that is Benicio. So what does that mean? Advantage on your hits, but you hit her. So anything you miss, roll a second time. I just missed, I will roll a second time. That is a 25 to hit.

The beast is going feral. Nine points of damage. And bonus action to attack with the back of the glaive. Let's do it. That's an 18. Advantage. Oh! That's less.

All right. Lawrence, it is on you. Well, I'm a scared little bitch right now, and I have to roll a wisdom saving throw to see if I even hold. And I took 12 points of damage, so I have to roll, no, 10. 10, yeah.

With whatever wisdom on fire you have. 17, I'm okay. You're good, okay. You can go no closer. What's that? You can go no closer than you are. Oh, but I don't have to turn, turn tail and run the fucking over? A frightened creature has disadvantage

on ability checks and attack rolls while the source of its fear is within line of sight. The creature can't willingly move closer to the source of its fear. So you can technically. Am I still in melee? Yeah. Awesome, I'll take all three attacks with disadvantage over.

But you have advantage because you're flanking. So it is balanced. Straight roll. Okay, 13 plus six is 19. Hits. Nice. Whoa. Second one, 10 plus six, 16. Harrow, frenzied wolf, desperate to live.

Eight, six, that's 14, so only one of those hits. That is four plus four is eight. One. Nine points of lightning damage on that. Yes! Her chest crackles for a moment and then goes still. It's like static shock from the fucking third floor. Okay. Do you get to roll to see if you stay frightened

at the top of the turn, or does it just keep frightening? What'd that do? Yes, if a target saving throw, the frightened target can repeat the saving throw at the end of each of its turns. So go, make a roll. Okay. It's wisdom.

12. Do not make it. Question, do I have a reaction yet? Is this a new round? Yes, it is. May I give him that opportunity? Yes, you may. Ooh, advantage?

His eye. Yep. Great. Even worse. Okay. Good call. Her harrowing presence is simply too great. It is. She is very scary.

The dark elf's turn. Wait, Dad said to stop. Nobody heard that except you. This was before the iron woe came. That's true. Wow. That was when you were choking him to death. I didn't choke him to death, I ripped out his throat.

What to save him? Same, same. Sometimes we have to set free those we love. Your AC is what, Benicio? It's 17 right now. Okay. You take five points of piercing damage as a spear floating in the air shoves into your back. Ah!

Like when I joined the fraternity. And that is the end of your turn, and now it is the Iron Woe's turn. Oh, the Iron Woe. The Iron Woe. Here she comes. Here she comes. The Iron Woe.

Turns this way, is feeling very penned in, and goes to town on Portia. Why Portia? Because you've marked my range of, do I get an attack? No, she just turned. It's very dexterous. Okay, so that's a 20 with her claw. Yeah, that hits me.

So you take 14 points of slashing damage. Is she magical? From Jean-B. Evia, she is. She is magical. And then she goes to bite you. Oh no. She leans down, the jaws open, oh, and you take a half step back

and feel those jaws go right there, right in front of your nose, and she misses and rears back, and her head tilts back, and she goes, and all of you feel a longing and a heartbreak that you can't really understand. I also have schmutz in my eyes, and my eyes won't stop tearing.

Aura, it is your turn. Come on, reindeer. Run over Gryll. So she is imperiled right now. Get her. The iron woe is imperiled right now. She's surrounded. She's surrounded. Get her.

And you are flanking her. Is she flanking her? No. But you're hasted, and you have two dire wolf bites, if you want. Oh, to inflict. I want to cast Guidance. You can't as a dire wolf. Shit. Balls. Great. So I can't do anything other than attack as a dire wolf? You can bite her. I could bite her.

You've got a little extra padding of druid hit points because you're in this direwolf shape. That's the positive. Could I transform at this point? You could, yeah. I could. You could go back to werewolf form, you could go to your...

I'm going to go back to werewolf form. Okay. That's my vibe right now. That's your bonus action. So you have action and hasted action. Now you can cast a spell. Now you can cast a spell. Okay. So the dire can cast a spell. Now you can cast a spell. Okay.

So the dire wolf shrinks up into, okay, so you use Guidance to cast on yourself. Yep. Perception. Sure. Well, what are you trying to perceive? I want to know, I mean, we felt her pain, we felt her torture, and I want to know what that means.

Make... an... Make a straight perception check. With your guidance. Plus four, or plus a d4 to this one. Oh, okay, thank you. That's a two, nine, nine, perception, seven, nine, 16, 16, thank you, I have to use my fingers,

I'm just admitting to it now. 16, great. Great ones always do. The pain that you feel echoing, all of you feel echoing in your minds is wild, not intelligent. It's a wounded animal. It's too hard to make out, it's beyond your ken.

You still have Haste of Action. Oh wait, Guidance was its own spell. Right, but am I in the midst of haste still? No, I'm going to give you one more action. I'm right next to her, so I don't really need to. Can I claw her, then? Yeah, you can bite. I can bite. No, you're a werewolf now. I'm a werewolf now. So you can claw. Yeah, you can bite. I can bite. No, you're a werewolf now.

I'm a werewolf now. So you can claw. Yeah, you got one claw. I got one. One. Or bite. Can I bite? Just claw. Just claw.

Damn it. So many wolf forms. So many forms. Guys! I know, Druid is hard. Shit! D&D can be frustrating. I can claw her one time?

Yes. Do it! Fuck her up. You just tried to learn the secret of her essence. Now you're going to take a look. I claw her from the top of her neck down her torso. Roll that d20. Come on, roll big, roll good, roll nice.

Wow. That loss. That all comes to the table. That loss has traveled over to you and every sibling in this room feels lost. All of you know that something is very wrong here and just on the edge of your comprehension, but you haven't grasped it yet.

Now it is Lucius's turn. Yes. How are we going to find that bastard? Lucius's turn. Lucius. How are we going to find that bastard? Lucius, that is correct. I will. Say a prayer. Okay. Moonweaver.

Strike down our enemies. Show us your sacred weapon, spiritual weapon. Excellent. It is... Yes, yes, yes. Shall I make a melee attack? Yes, you may. It is a silver scimitar that very much represents the crescent moon.

Yes. Cool. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes, yes, yes. That is a good move. That is the move. That is the move.

You chose your weapon correctly. I am 18. And it's against her. It does not hit. It just misses. I continue with the moonbeam raining down on her. Does she save again? Oh, right.

How is she supposed to take it? Oh, no. Yeah, that's moonbeam is tricky. She does not make the save. Yes. 10 points of damage. Okay. And she has the mark of waning on her.

And remind me. Creature speed is halved, and it has disadvantage on strength ability checks. Okay, okay, got it. She doesn't really count anymore, she's just kicking ass. Top of the round, she's going to use one of her legendary actions to move

without provoking any opportunity, a jet almost like a squid releasing ink, just you guys are enveloped in a cloud of sorrow, and you hear the bones scraping against each other, and she glides away faster than you would have imagined, but doesn't go far. And comes right back to here. Do we get a... No attack of opportunity on that legendary action. That's so much good.

Yeah. And it's Portia's turn. Oh. Come on, girl. Get it. Shit. Shit. There it is. That's the beat. Oh shit. There it is. That's the beat.

I'm going to run over and... I'm going to keep straight doing my claws. It's a nice transition. Shit. And I'm going to run over to the iron woe and hit her a couple times. Okay, coming back at it, claw, claw, claw. Claw, claw, claw. Got it. See claw, claw? Claw, claw, claw, claw. Got it.

See if it hits. Claw, claw, claw, claw. Oh, that first one doesn't hit. Okay. Second one does hit. All right. Oh wait, can I, oh wait, can I, I want to go around to the back of him, her,

so I can flank her. Can I flank her? Five, 10, fifteen, twenty. Stalagmites. Yes. You've got a stalactite up your ass. Stalagmites, yes. Yes, sure. Yes, absolutely. Those first two rolls, did I just say the first one hit? And then I'll roll advantage on it.

What did you roll on the one that hit? I rolled 19. Natural 19 on the one. Okay, great. So next hit. This is a third? No, this is a second attack. I thought one missed. No, because I got advantage, remember?

Why do you have advantage? Because I'm flanking. Because you're flanking now, thank you. Natural 20 on the second one! On the second, okay. So hit, 20 hit, and? I feel bad for her. And eight plus, I don't think the last one hits,

eight plus whatever, six. I don't know,. And eight plus, I don't think the last one hits, eight plus whatever, six. I don't know, 14 does not hit, but give me your natural 20 and your regular hit. Okay, the first one is six plus five is 11. And then the critical, oh, that's four. You never visit me. Eight plus five. I don't know what she's saying.

Eight plus five, 13? Yeah. Okay. Never visit me. Eight plus five. That's not what she's saying. Eight plus five, 13? Yeah. Okay. A coal every once in a while. So you rush at her and you strike out in the first, we'll say the first hit misses, and then you just grab at her rib.

I use the stag mite and I swing around it. Okay, so yeah, so you come swinging around almost like it's a pole and grab hold of her and you miss on the first one, but then right yourself and grab claw, grab claw on a rib and you rip, pry a gigantic rib away and throw it across the cavern. Don't throw it, beat her to death with it. She's going to use a legendary action

to release that cloud of darkness again. She's still half moving, right? Or does legendary action crush that? No, it doesn't, you're right. It's half moving, so good, thank you, TJ. Twink. She's got two legendary actions to turn. Ooh.

Ooh. Mm. Cute. She has three legendary. Oh, a round. She has points. Different things take more out of her. Ooh.

To let you see behind the veil a bit. Now we are onto Benicio. But I'm too far to do anything. Benicio. She's bad news. Now we are onto Benicio. But I'm too far to do anything. Benicio. She's bad news. She's more than 30 feet away from me, isn't she? Come on, deep, basic wriggle.

Get this good. Yeah. Is she more than 30 feet away from me, Liam? This time tomorrow, you'll be high and sprightly all over again. 20, 20, she's just within range. I'm going to run up on sprightly all over again. 20, 20, she's just within range. I'm going to run up on Grandma. Oh, leave Dad behind.

Bye, Dad. And I'm going to stab her in the butt. Okay. Your butt. Good flavor. Stab her in the butt. 19 hits. Sorry, Grandma. That's weird. 13 points of damage. How much?

13 points of damage. Great. No more allowance for you. I sent you a birthday card with a five dollar bill in it. Your sweater's never fit. I didn't hear it. I'll stab her again in the belly. Go for it.

Sweaters never fail. Okay. But I'll bonus action here in the back. Okay. Do it, Jock. That also misses one team. Great, just like when you practice nunchucks in front of your mirror.

That's it, now I'm right on her. She's going to kill me. She is, in fact, going to use a legendary action to swipe at your ass, so. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Here it comes. Oh, not that great, actually. Nope, your AC is 17.

She lumbers around and swipes and you had just finished doing this little trick with the butt end of the weapon and held her back for a second as she went. You held her at bay. Oh my god. Save me! And it's Lawrence's turn. I'm still frightened, right? I'm still frightened. You are still frightened. Can I roll to see if I have to roll at the end of it? It's at the end of your turn.

Son of a bitch ass. You can't move closer to it. No, I can't. At the end of each of your turns. Don't you have something you can throw? I can't move closer, right? Nope, can't go near her. Maybe I should just run the other direction

with my claws out and see if I hit that invincible trap. Fuck it, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to run in this direction as fast as I can. You can't go in here, huh? I'm running parallel, right? Yeah, you could run this way, but your brother's in the way. All right, I'll run towards Orah, further away, just with my claws out. Just see if I hit anything. So you get right here.

Aura steps to the side just slightly. No connection. Okay. I know where he is. I'm going to keep dashing. Art's a different form, right? She's in the hybrid form. I'm in the werewolf. Yeah, actually, all right.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Where is that? It's right next to the, it's close, yeah. And I'll use my action to dash over to this corner. Okay. That's a great idea. Did I feel anything? Ah!

Terrified, like. No connection. No connection. Can I roll to break the? Yes, please do. Oh, 18 plus one, 19. You get around the corner, you get her out of your vision,

plant your hand, your claw against the ground, and just breathe for a second. I'm very tough, I'm very big, I'm very strong. I've abandoned my son! I just realized what I wanted to do with my, is dead grandma 60 feet away from me now or further? You sent her to action 25, 30. You don't have anything left, 35, 40.

She's within range of 60 feet, but you've done all that stuff. I have a bonus action, don't I? Speed. For cloth. Action to dash. No, I just want to use, as a bonus action, I can use my Blood Curse of the Marked. Oh, sure. Mark an enemy within 60 feet

and deal double Crimson Rite damage to it until the end of your turn. Does it say sight? Do you have to seer? It does have to be in sight, so. Okay, it's okay. A lot of new rules here, a lot of stuff happening. Werewolves are tough.

Werewolves, blood hunters. Yes. Curses. All of it. Whoever wrote these blood hunters and lycans is just terrible. Probably a blonde here. Yeah. Right now, where do you think he is right now?

You mean what plane? Yes, what plane of existence? He's probably under the firmament. You're about to find out. When it's my turn, I'm sorry. What plane? Yes, what plane of existence? It's probably under the firmament. You're about to find out. When it's my turn, I'm not ready to ask it. It's almost your turn. It's not yet, so it's going to be. It doesn't say, but it's not.

It doesn't say it has to be. Lucius. You feel a single hand spank down hard on your shaved head, and you feel a creeping, crawling. No, no, no, no. Vomitous sensation radiate through your whole body as necrotic damage radiates in through the back of your head and you take 26 points of necrotic damage.

Oh shit! Is this a spell? Yes. Is this an attack spell? of your head and you take 26 points of necrotic damage. Oh shit! Is this a spell? Yes. Is this an attack spell? Yes. I will invoke my Blood Curse of the Fallen puppet. Does it say anything about sight?

I need to know that the spell's being cast. Ice cream? I'm right up on grandma, I don't know if, I don't know. Ice cream spell? Oh, this is being cast by Invisible Fucktide. It says rend the spell from the air. I'm going to Nyx that. I'm going to say he's invisible.

There was no preconceived notion of it yet. All you heard was, ooh! Okay, cool. And it's done. 26 points of necrotic. Ooh, Lucius. Ouch. You feel And it's done. 26 points of necrotic. Oh, Lucius. Ouch. Oh, Lucius. You feel just a bit of breeze behind you.

There's no save for that, no. You feel just a bit of breeze behind you and a step, you hear it. The moment's passed. Thank you. Thank you, sir. It is the iron woe's turn. The iron woe. The iron woe.

The iron woe. Iron time. Iron woe. She's just going to lay into what she's facing, which is Benicio. Where woes of woe. Yep, hits. 18, beats your armor class. Oh, yes, hits. 18, beats your armor class. Oh yes, sure.

That is 12 points of slashing damage. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Okay, and then she leans in to bite. She hasn't bitten anybody, and she still hasn't bitten anybody, because you rolled a three. Wow. She's just snapping away.

Go on. Can't get anyone. She's so pissed. She's pretty pissed. That's it, she's just going to stay there. Now it is Aura's turn. All right, can I Flaming Spear this lady? Sure you can. I was going to say something else, but I didn't say it.

You can say that if you want. I don't want to say it. I'm not going to say it. She's my grandma. I'm not going to say it. Yeah, don't disrespect your grandma. I'm not going to. She's like an iron wall or say it. I'm not going to say it. She's my grandma. I'm not going to say it. Yeah, don't disrespect your grandma. I'm not going to. I'm fucking cursed this day much. She's like an iron wall or whatever, but I'm not going to go there about it. But yes, I would like a flaming spear at her.

Okay, so you drag your hands in a giant circle in front of you, and about as big as an exercise ball, a giant bowling ball of flame springs to life right in front of you, and you send it, I assume, towards her. So careening through, and you guys see it, Caportia, you see it coming, Benicio, you do not.

It hits this and actually does a little skateboard trick, kills Laura, and bounces down and lands right next to the iron woe, burning in the fire, flashes out from it, connecting with her. She has to make a dex save. Got this. What's your DC, spell DC?

It's on your character page on the bottom right. 15. 15. She doesn't make it. Yes! So she takes full damage. 2d6? 2d6. 2d6, so roll the square one twice.

Unless you wanted to cast it at a higher level, but that should be fast, I guess. Okay. Seven. Seven points of damage, and that flaming sphere is out here. It just stays? Stays. Can I direct it another time? Ooh! Seven. Seven points of damage, and that flaming sphere is out here. It just stays?

Stays. Can I direct it another time? Not for this turn. My next turn, though, I could theoretically. Lucius, you are up. Unless you want to move somewhere. You have a bonus action. You have a hasted action and movement.

Hasted action and movement. So hasted action, she could only do a melee. She could, what again? So you can go claw her if you want. You can move 60 feet because you're the flash right now, and you could claw her if you got up on her. Okay, I'm going to do that then. Okay. That's what I'm doing.

So you just crouch low and run, five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, for sure. Three claws? You don't get three claws, you get one. What is with the one? So roll to see if you hit. Fine, all right, here we go. Can I support you? Yeah.

If the drow casts a spell, he could stay invisible after casting it. What is his strength? What am I doing? No, he can't, you're right. That's right, that's right. You know what? So we'll get to that in a moment. What thing would I even do it with, though?

It's plus five. Oh, the clawing, the clawing, all right. Now it's nine, it's not a thing. Okay. And you have a bonus action if you wanted to heal anyone. I do, that was, was that it? The bonus action was the mist slash. You just tried to slash, right? I did.

So got a retcon. That's right, when you cast While Invisible, it goes. So what I want to do is let you know that in your peripheral vision, after getting spanked in the back of the head, the drow's behind you and bolts away in this direction. Great. So you get an attack of opportunity if you want.

Yes, please. All right, go for it. Yeah, I forgot to cast, when you're invisible, reveal. Yep. For the bad guy? Yeah. Yeah, that's why Caleb wouldn't do anything in that dungeon forever.

Is he visible now? He's visible now. Where is he? He's here. He's about to run away from Lucius. This is rewinding in time. Ah, keep hitting that. That hits. Yes!

Is he cackling while he runs? Six points of damage. Six, okay, got it. My sickle slashes through his back. Yeah, it does. He cries out and keeps running. And now we're on your actual turn. How much space is between the drow and the iron woe?

I'm going to put him here. Five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five. 25 feet, 30 feet. Okay. First, I'm going to move the moonbeam on top of the iron woe. Great. Okay, so that almost waterfall of bright pale light gushing out of a hole in nothing just drags across the ground and centers on the iron woe, and she has to make a con save. Does not make it, I roll a three. That is 2d 10 yar. 15 points of damage. Okay. Bits of bone shard, dark and solid as it is, start to chip away, and she is starting to fragment.

Yeah! She's looking right at you. Okay, this is good. Then I send the spiritual weapon after the drow, and it's a shiny and silver scimitar, so I'd like. And it was, it can only move 20 feet. It was attacking. It was, yeah. Oh, okay, then I'll keep it on her if I can. You can, yeah. So I don't think it would make it to the drow,

but you can, sure. That is, Church, what's this, but you can, sure. That is. I didn't know that. The spiritual weapon says 20 feet. That's not a lot. No. I don't know what that is. I don't want to do that. That's 20 feet. 17?

17 on the iron woe does not hit. Oh! All times. Okay. And is that an action or does the spiritual weapon do its own thing? Spiritual weapon is a bonus action. Great, and.

Oh my god, those are two spells you have up and you can just attack with. That's badass. Is that the advantage of the map? Yeah, because spiritual is not concentration. It is not. Wow, that's badass. Yeah.

What? Woo, moonbeam's concentration, but Spiritual's not. Wow. All right. It's like this guy's played before. And. It is as though. Like he has color-coded sheets. It is as though.

Do I? Do I know anything about drow? Make a history check. You speak Elven, right? No. No, I do. I know nothing. No, only what you hear about the Dwendalian Empire's efforts against them, not them. I know the nasty and sneaky little bitch. Then I will... No, yep, no, yes.

Yes. I don't want to get slapped in the back of the head again. I will cast Spirit Guardians on myself. Okay. Got it. And three beings of light appear around you. Translucent, but formidable. Whoa.

And I step closer to the iron woe so that it's within the reach, but I stay on the other side of the stalagmite. Where is it? Spiritual guardians, 15 feet. Concentration, so moonbeam is down. Oh, then if it's a concentration, it is concentration? Concentration, up to ten minutes.

You can write comment, it's fine. I didn't see concentration on it. You would know your shit? No, I thought I wrote them down, but it did not write concentration. I don't mean you, I mean Lucius would know that one would cancel out the other. So if you want moonbeam up, moonbeam's up.

Yeah, moonbeams are more important, I think. Moonbeam. Moonbeam. I will guiding bolt. And guiding bolt is? Guiding bolt, her! Ride of the butt! What is it with the butt?

You roll. Everybody got to get the butt. That's a spell attack, right? It is. Go for it. That's a thing, I'm not sure. Give us an advantage on the next attack. I feel like, okay, are we taking it there?

Is that what's happening right now? 24. Oh, that hits. Wow. Yeah. I would like to pray. I pray. DJ's doing all the moves. Yeah.

Aw. 13 points of damage. Okay. Just 13. Good, no, another rib splinters out and sticks sideways. She's starting to lean to the side a bit. Whoever attacks next has advantage on the attack. Ooh. It is Portia's turn.

Portia. Switch. Portia, Portia, Portia. That edits. So she's slowed. Come on, take her down. All right, I'm going to run up to her. Yeah, Pasha.

Do I get advantage on all three attacks or just the first attack? If you're flanking, you mean? From the guiding. I think it's just the first attack, so I'm going to flank her. First attack, okay. I'm going to flank her so that I can get it.

That's easy enough to do. That's not. That's not you? Oh, that's our druid, right. Sorry, you're red. I'm the reddish one. Yeah, theid, right. Sorry, you're red. I'm the reddish one. Yeah, the one you're on board.

You're the blue. The blue bottom. Yes, but the reddish paint. Five, ten, fifteen, twenty. Done. Okay. I'm going to try to hit her. Okay. 17 plus something. that first one hits. Second one, natural 20.

Yeah! So it was hit, natural 20? Hit, natural 20. Third is 11 plus six, 16, so no, 17. Nope. Still doesn't hit. So, some points of 17. Nope. Still doesn't. Okay. Some points, some damage. First one. Eight plus five is 13.

And then this critical. This is it. Ah, man. Eight plus five is 13 again. 13 again? Yeah. Okay. You strike out and grab and rake at her hip and you tear an entire hip bone away

and throw it down to the ground. She is staggering on her feet. She is still up. And she is angry at you. Oh no. and she is angry at you and drags a claw across your face. It's not considered a weapon attack, is it? It's just a claw attack. It's a claw attack for 16 points of slashing damage.

Ooh, yikes. Oh boy. Oh dear, oh dear. It was a legendary action. Oh no, I'm almost dead. Are you unconscious? No. No, oh. I'm still standing.

Okay, okay. Up to the dead. Benicio, you're up. I'm sorry, Grandma! And I will attack terribly. I will attack again much better. 23. What are you using?

My glaive. Your glaive. And you're standing with Lichinger, yo, so you're at advantage. Yeah, you're at advantage. Oh, so that's the first attack. May I move closer to my father? That's a 23 to hit, right?

And that is 15 points of damage. 15 points of damage. 15 points of damage. You smash the glaive across her face and her lower jaw flies and clatters into the stone and hits the ground. She stands, pathetic, teetering in front of you. Is this the bonus action? This is my second attack.

Also at advantage? Yes, because you're flanking. That's crazy. Miss. Okay. Oh my god. Bonus. Yeah, go for it. Natural 20.

Yeah! This is a different thing. The bonus strike is less, guys. The bonus strike is less, guys. The bonus strike is only a d4 plus three. Venecio, how do you want to do this? Oh! I would like to stick the glaive through her pelvis bone and just go around in a circle.

I'll duck, I'll duck. With your tiny feet. And then let go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's not tap her again. So you drive the glaive right through her entire form

and then you just drag and push and push and use that force, that torque, as you go to unwind her body and pull bone off and bone off and bone off. She falls to her bony knee down to her chest, claws at the ground, and rests still. In your face, Lawrence. That's how a man does it.

The elf? I point. And it's your turn. Yeah, I've just finished running with my claws out in the air. And I see that little motherfucker run, I'm like, itch. I'll use my bonus action to now Blood Curse of the Marked on the drow. Okay. And I will close the distance on him and take three swipes with my blood crimson right claws.

You can make an omen until the end of your turn. Are you amplifying or just doing the basic? Amplifying. So take 1d6 damage. Yep, 1d6 or just six? 1d6 for amplify. Amplify. Three points of damage.

Okay, go for it. Natural 20. Yes! On the first one. Second one is... Wait, you used your movement to get to him. It's five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. You're not quite there. Oh fuck.

You can use your action. I'll give you your action to get there and your bonus action for that natural 20. I'll take that. That seems get there and your bonus action for that natural 20. I'll take that. That seems very fair. Great. Okay. So... that's going to be three, six, four, ten, and then... six, twelve, 22 points of damage with the lightning Crimson Rite. Oh, and I doubled the Crimson Rite damage,

which was the crit, so it was 12 points of Crimson Rite damage, so 24. Because he's marked. On top of the 10, so 34. 34 total? 34 total. Nasty. Okay. With one fucking bonus total. Nasty. Okay.

With one fucking bonus attack. Yeah, thank you. Wow. That was the iron wool. Did I get it wrong? That was the iron wool. Yeah, the iron wool. Iron wool. The eye of the world is one square away from getting all the other two.

Fuck! What's he doing? Shit. What? Wasn't good. The drow reaches out to grab you and you just bat the arm away and you see almost worms, black, disgusting energy

dripping off. You see a look of real fear. And he starts to go. He's running? You get another attack on him. I do get an attack on him. Yes, you do. Yes. That's cocked.

That's a 19 plus. Hits. Yeah. Hits. There you go. Three, nine. Six. 15, 15 points with the lightning damage. 15, 15 points with the lightning damage. 15, okay. You rake a canal down this man's back,

and he is staggering away down this hall pathetically, blood just pouring down his back. He's on his feet, he looks like shit. Damn. Aura, it's your turn. Aura, end him. Don't let him get away. Aura, end him. Don't let him get away. Spell him.

I send Windwall to block his passage. Can I do this? That's super cool. Let's see how we can make it work. Help me. Aura, Windwall. I have died. The Windwall. I will send Windwall.

Windwall. He'll give me strength to do so. Where'd he go, where'd he go, where'd he go? Ooh, yeah. I will send Wind Wall. Wind Wall. He'll give me strength to do so. Where to go, where to go, where to go? Ooh, yeah. I'm ready, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can totally do that. This is what I want.

He just picks a point on the ground and then he has to make a save. What's the range on it, though? The range on Wind Wall. 120 feet. Oh, yeah, that's great. This is as far as I want. Yeah, he is so low, I will say that you

just walk calmly, throw up your hands, and that energy flies out of frenetic, angry energy spins this asshole like a dryer tumbler in that hallway because you have just shoved a wind wall into a very small space, sending it starting here through there like a snake. I could roll, but he is beaten back and forth against the sides of that passage, and his head softens into pulp, and he is turned into a bloody mess, and lies on the ground. That was my howl, did you like it? It's good. Oh!

It was good, yeah. Full enthusiasm on that one. I would like to use my Blood Curse of the Fallen puppet. What is that? On the drow? On the dead drow. I want him to wake up and with his last bit of life, give Lawrence a wedgie. Fuck you!

You have to roll, that's a straight roll. Yeah, sure. I need you to roll something to see if this works. No, let's do this. Lawrence, make a dex save. Yeah, give me a shot, man. I remember Grog trying to pants-vax. Ow! What? What is it? Natural turn. 19. I'm going to amplify. Get in the shot. Dance backs. Ow! What? What is it, natural turn?

19. I'm going to amplify. Did I do the same? Which adds my wisdom modifier to it, which is a plus four. Roll like shit. I don't know, do I roll? What am I doing? For this, yeah, you got to roll.

This is outside the ten, it's a bunch of drag. Six plus four. Yeah! The mangled corpse does move, but the bones are broken, so it's just this shambling, disgusting mess, and it slops onto Lawrence's front and then slimes to the ground. Bitcho! That was me, bro. I just really must hate you. Oh, blood is coming out of me. I just took two points of damage. You know it's late here at the studio,

so I'm going to eulogize this game. Okay, okay. And tell you, you've saved your father, which I didn't anticipate. Ooh. It's the middle of the night. You take Hal back to your family home, and he doesn't speak for the entire walk back.

He looks very shaken, haunted. You get him back to his room, and the five of you standing around him as he would want, comfort him and encourage him to talk. And he spends the next hour telling you how this man attacked the keep with a small army of undead, slaughtered everyone in the castle except for him, and then asks you to sit down

and explains to you that the man that you've just finished was your grandfather. The drow. He did come from Xhorhas. Awesome. He did have a torrid romance with Genevieve Lorelei. His people came for him to drag him back.

Lorelei was killed. Genevieve Lorelei was killed. Genevieve Lorelei was killed. The drow's twin brother was killed and he was taken back to Xhorhas to be re-enlightened. He also asks that in the weeks to follow, you help him to reseal the tomb below and to learn

from this misstep in the family line. And though there is darkness, it doesn't mean that the light is gone. And hold on to that. And he reiterates that he loves you very much. But you love me most. Shakes his head. Some days.

And he drifts off to sleep. And the five of you look across your father in bed, asleep, safe, and rethink your future plans in relation to the House Lorelai. And that's where we'll end the story. Yeah! Liam O'Brien.

Yes! So good. Yeah, we went, woo! You said we went, woo! Very O'Brien. Yes! So good. Yeah, we went, ooh! He's never went full! Very smart, though. He was way more powerful that way. He saved our ass.

Man, every time I run these games, I'm like, I'm going to make it shorter this time. I'm going to keep it, it's impossible. They fill, man, they fill. It's impossible. Erica. That was great. Oh, yeah! First time, first time, first time. Oh, Druid, that's a hard way to go on first time. No, you was great. Oh! Yeah! First time, first time, first time. A druid, that's a hard one to go on.

Yeah, druid's so dope. No, you did great. Everyone should play D&D. Everyone should play D&D. But not start with a druid. It's not a good, holy moment. Unless you've got to get two of the hardest. It is the hardest part.

It's not really? Well, guys, Burning Man will soon be done. We'll be back to our regular scheduled programming. We look forward to having our three wandering travelers back. But for now, I don't know what it said. Be good to each other, love one another, try to be good. And is it Thursday yet? Yeah!

Nice work! Oh, hey! Ashley Johnson here, and I sure do hope you're enjoying the adventure. Remember when you first found out about Critical Role? Was it through a friend, or a family member, or maybe even through the words of a stranger in the review section of our podcast? Many listeners find our show through word of mouth and recommendations. So please consider rating and reviewing our podcast because each review makes an impression that may just inspire someone new to give our show a try. And that, more than anything, helps to support us. Thank you for joining us on this adventure.

And until next time, let us try to leave the world a little better than we found it.