Critical Role - Mortal Kombat 1 One-Shot | Sindel Vs. The Realms

Episode Date: September 26, 2023

Thank you to WB Games for sponsoring this one-shot! Gamemaster Marisha Ray leads a Mortal Kombat themed smackdown with players Sam Riegel, Noshir Dalal, Travis Willingham, and Gina Darling using Till The Last Gasp by Darrington Press! Mortal Kombat 1 is available now on PS5, Xbox Series X|S, PC, and Nintendo Switch! Get the game today at https://www.mortalkombat.com/en-us/purchase To learn more about Till The Last Gasp, check out our Darrington Press Website: https://darringtonpress.com/till-the-last-gasp/ To join in our live and moderated community chat, please head on over to our Twitch channel at: https://twitch.tv/criticalrole Due to the improv nature of Critical Role and other RPG content on our channels, some themes and situations that occur in-game may be difficult for some to handle. If certain episodes or scenes become uncomfortable, we strongly suggest taking a break or skipping that particular episode. Your health and well-being is important to us and Psycom has a great list of international mental health resources, in case it’s useful: http://bit.ly/PsycomResources PLAYERS/ GAME MASTER Marisha Ray: https://twitter.com/Marisha_Ray Noshir Dalal: https://twitter.com/NoshirDalal Gina Darling: https://twitter.com/MissGinaDarling Sam Riegel: https://twitter.com/samriegel Travis Willingham: https://twitter.com/WillingBlam Overlay Graphic Design by Bryan Weiss Till the Last Gap CREATIVE TEAM Created By: Will Hindmarch Additional Design: Alex Roberts Producer: Alex Uboldi Writing By: Alex Roberts, Meredith Katz, and Austin Taylor Editor: Meredith Katz Scenarios By: Austin Taylor Graphic Design: Stephanie Gottesman Illustration: Arka Tu, Daryna Kyrychenko, and Idamaria Pajala Cover Art: Arka Tu Cultural Consultant: James Mendez Hodes

Good day, Critters! Travis Willingham here, and I am excited to welcome you to the podcast version of our Critical Role show. If you would like to watch the stream as it airs, you can tune in on Thursdays at 7 p.m. Pacific at twitch.tv slash criticalrole or at youtube.com slash criticalrole. The video-on-demand versions are immediately available for our Twitch subscribers or on YouTube the following Mondays at 12 p.m. Pacific. Podcast episodes are right here on the Critical Role Podcast Network on Thursdays, one week after the initial broadcast. Now that we've got all that covered, let's get this adventure going. Hello, and welcome to this very special one-shot

where we will be playing in the Mortal Kombat universe. And as a little treat tonight, we will actually be utilizing the rules for Till the Last Gasp as our system. It's going to be a lot of fun, but first, let's meet our players, starting with you, Sam Riegel. I'm Sam Riegel, and tonight I'll be portraying the role of Johnny Cage.

Can you close that jacket at all? Oh, you did! I give the people what they want. You've got the cutest little baby hair, chest hair, it's so cute. I grew them just for tonight. Oh, right. I thought Johnny Cage would've gone waxed.

Don't you think? I do, too, yeah. He would be smooth as salt. Yeah, he's waxing out here. He doesn't have his groomer. He was busy, you know, doing something else. No, there's a strike. There's a strike, yes, exactly.

Oh god. And Nashir, tell us who you are. I'm Nashir strike, yes, exactly. Oh, God. And Nashir, tell us who you are. I'm Nashir Talal, here as the Wizard Reign. Yes! He's such a badass with ribbons. You don't have to call the secret out. We have not even started and you're breaking the illusion. New teams, new teams.

Let's jump over to this side of the table. Gina. Hi, I am Gina Darling, and I will be playing the fan favorite. Ooh! Oh boy! Wow, oh boy. I'm filled with those. Woo hoo!

Amazing. And Travis. Oh yes, I am Travis Willingham, and I will be playing Raiden. Old classic voice of Raiden. And tonight, your master of ceremonies will be Sindel, if it was not obvious. It wasn't me. Queen Sindel, yes.

As always, Sam is a new initiate to Mortal Kombat because he's new initiate to most things. So if he says something that doesn't make sense, that's why. And on that note. Michelangelo is not a character. No. While you may recognize the places explored and the characters fighting tonight,

the story of this one shot and the interpretations of our characters are entirely our own creations and not official combat, or official content from the Mortal Kombat series. This is all made up. This is not canon. When we screw it up, it's not real. We sure will.

Thank you so much to Warner Brothers Games for letting us play around in Outworld, and of course, for sponsoring this one-shot. I think that's it. Oh boy. Oh boy. Let's jump into tonight's episode of Mortal Kombat! There's a high-pitched ringing in your ears. Your heads are all throbbing with a familiar sensation.

You slowly blink your eyes open to blinding light. As the ring in your ears begins to fade, it is slowly replaced with a familiar sound. A sound of cheering. Golf claps abound. Mild hoops and hollers. You get to your feet and, much to your chagrin,

you appear to be in the middle of a palace. And there's a party happening. Yeah, baby. I'm sorry. And you all are the main entertainment. The palace is adorned with decorations. You see topiary plants and garland, a nice little bubbling champagne fountain in the middle.

And the surrounding area is lush, beautiful greenery, domed buildings that you can see outside of this palace entryway. Everything is decorated with a gold filigree leafing. As you start to analyze this scene for a moment more, you look across the room and notice that there is a buffet. Oh. Oh.

Nice charcuterie board, lay it upon it. But the buffet table appears to be a man. Very large, buff man with bulging muscles, a horned helmet upon him, pauldrons that curl up and are spiked, and all of his limbs are broken and cracked backwards, attached to table legs. And then you look even closer and see that

the table decorations of little topiary plants and bonsai trees aren't placed upon him. They are growing through him. Ew! One through the center, coming out the back of his neck, growing into and out of his mouth, with the other one just below his pelvic bone, growing outwards.

I'm sure he's fine. Blood dripping down. Oh! That's great. with the other one just below his pelvic bone, growing outwards. Blood dripping down. Oh! That's great. You see tears and bloody, bloodstained tears trickling out of the corners of his eyes. He's still alive. Oh! Come on! That's...

You all recognize him. This... Sindel's husband, Shao Kahn. Damn, I thought it might be! As you look past the buffet table, you see, sitting at a throne at the end of the room, a beautiful woman with long, flowing white hair, a shock of black down the middle.

She wears lavender armor that appears to be decorative in nature. This is Sindel. She's holding a coupe glass of champagne. Oh. Ah! Hello, champions. Hi, Mom.

Hello, daughter. I've missed you so. Missed you, too. This man was fucked up. Welcome to Edenia. I apologize for the rude awakening, the abrupt summoning of you here. However, it seems I never got your RSVPs for my little celebration.

I'll just assume that they got lost in the mail. You see, we have much to celebrate. For starters, my reclamation of the throne, my divine right to rule Edenia. You see, my beloved realm has been subjected to so many intruders. It has been the stomping ground for invaders and traitors alike. For centuries, my

people have been subjected to brutality Shao Kahn table. Isn't that right, my darling? He just gags and tries to squirm, but it is fruitless. What do you want from the guy? This is how I find out? You couldn't, all right, I mean. It's true, she is.

Sorry. Hey, Dad. We couldn't get ahold of you. Oh my god, it's fine. It's okay. Now, to celebrate this wondrous occasion, I thought I would throw a tournament. Please, champions, why don't you introduce yourselves

to my esteemed party guests? Champions, why don't you introduce yourselves to my esteemed party guests? Let's start with you, Johnny Cage. Well, hold on just a second, lady. Did Skadoo set this up? Who's Skadoo? Skadoo Finkelstein, my agent. Because times have been a little tough.

Obviously there's strikes going on. I haven't worked in a couple months, but that's not on me. That's on the industry. The industry has slowed down. I still got it. I'm still at the top of my game and don't let anyone tell you any differently.

Now, if he set up some personal appearances so I can keep the cashflow going, I get it. But like, how much are we talking here? 50,000, $100,000? What am I getting for this? The affairs of Earthrealm are not of my concern, and I would hope that it is apparent. I'm pretty anti-union.

As Sindel famously is. Listen, listen, we need those protections. There's all sorts of, the producers are trying to screw us left and right. Listen, I'm not going to get into that right now. Reign. Wait! I didn't even get to strut, oh, fine. Earthrealmers.

It is good to see you again. Please, tell my guests whom you are. My name is Reign, a near god with wizard powers. I control the water, elements, and lightning, and I am not here for your entertainment. Hmm. I hate to inform you, today, you actually are here for my entertainment.

Being an entertainer is not such a bad thing. By the way, I feel like I messed up on my intro. Can I just give one more shot? Fine. Johnny Cage, six foot one. I'm represented by Finkelstein and Finkelstein. I'll be reading for the role of champion tonight. All right, good.

That's my slate. Keep going. I hate you. I hate you so much. You got a B10 for a slate. Lovely daughter, Katana Kahn. Mother. Welcome home, sweetheart. This is not how I wanted to see you again,

but I guess this will do. I hope you've been doing well. I've been doing all right. I bet. Nothing like learning you've been brainwashed by your husband for the third time. What a good day for clarity. Yeah, excellent.

This is exactly how I wanted to find out. So good seeing you, and Dad has looked better, but. Oh, I don't know. I think he looks quite well, actually. I am Kitana, as you can tell. I'm clearly related to them. I haven't been home in a while, and I see you've done some redecorating

with your topiaries. Yes. I'm happy to be here, Mother. You look wonderful. Not a day over. I don't need that. I'm going to stay away from that. Just a little 1,000 plus, but it's fine. Not a day under millennia. Do you use fillers and stuff?

Is that what you do? Because I do, too. There's nothing wrong with that. This is a realm with magic and sorcerers, abso-fucking-lutely. As you can tell, my mother has a very eclectic way of celebrating things. Happy divorce.

Thank you. Mom. Honestly, it's nice to have your father serve me for once. Ooh. Gross. Raiden. Always a pleasure. Protector of the Earthrealm. God of Thunder and Lightning, also. Yes. Important to add.

And not to pull out any quick-minute critiques, but really, no purple carpet, no step and repeat. Johnny Cage isn't the only one that's disappointed. I mean, this form needs to be documented. I have so many different skins. Don't worry. You'll all be getting quite the tour later on. Fair enough. I'm sure you'll be impressed. I've seen Shao Kahn look worse, but not much worse.

Well, without further ado, why don't we get the celebration going? Hooray! Now, what is a party if you cannot celebrate it with friends? Johnny, Raiden, I'm sure you remember your old pal Nightwolf. You know I do.

Sorry. Who's Nightwolf? Okay. You've met him multiple times. You signed something for him in 1996. Oh, I did, yeah. I'll never forget a fan. Shiva! Sindel signals to her right-hand woman, Shiva,hand woman, Shiva, buff woman, with multiple arms,

as she goes and she reaches behind the throne and pulls out Nightwolf, who is bound in chains and looks severely beaten already. Nightwolf is a Native American with dark black hair that hits his shoulders and red face paint that drips, and you can see it is streaming, and you can't exactly tell where the face paint begins

and the blood ends. He is tossed into the middle of the floor. Oops. All of the guests just clap. Shiva detaches himself from his chains. You see, Nightwolf once sacrificed himself to kill me. Sort of taking me down with him. So brave, so heroic, so noble.

I would like to recreate that moment tonight. Just a little sacrifice on his part. But this time, I'm staying right here. Johnny Cage? Yeah? Introduce Nightwolf to his sacrifice. What? Introduce him to his sacrifice?

What does that mean? You want me to fight him or something? Absolutely. Round one! What? Let's fight! Hey, listen, lady, I didn't sign up for this. I got to call my car service and go home. I got to get my beauty sleep tonight.

What? Banshee scream comes from your direction from Sindel. Chunks of your face begin to peel away. Your ears immediately rupture and blood pours out from them. Her eyes turn white for a flash and begin to fade. Fight! This is not an optional thing.

Fine. Fine, you brought us here for a show, and I'm a showman. Delirious Nightwolf, knowing that he is about to fight for his life, charges at you. Oh god! He summons out of his hand a tomahawk made of pure spirit energy and lunges in your direction. Whoa, whoa, whoa!

What do you do? I attack. I'm going to drop to the splits to dodge his tomahawk strike and I'm going to go straight for the nut punch right away. First thing out of the gate. He comes and he does a wide swing, aiming directly for your neck. But as you immediately drop into the splits,

he is not seeing it come in and right in the testes. I'm sorry, bro. I didn't, it's nothing personal. He's coming at you again with another swing with the opposite hand. I will try to lift his ankle from under him and get him on the ground.

It succeeds. You successfully trip him. He lands hard on his back. He's already incredibly weak and delirious, but he does a little fan kick and stands back up quite quickly. I will cartwheel over to the buffet table, grab a skewer of roast beef.

Incredible. And not even shaking the roast beef. Incredible. And not even shaking the roast beef off, I'm going to toss it back and forth between my hands, do one of these things, and be like, sorry, bro, it's nothing personal. I just got to put on a show for the lady. It's all show business, and I'll go for the stab right into the head.

Fantastic. The audience sees a few chunks of beef. It's impressive. You hit his temple with such force that it instantly shatters his skull and the beef stays on and goes all the way through his cranium and out the other side. A few carrots and potatoes tumble off, but he is instantly skewered

and falls backwards, joining the buffet table, dead. You see very similar soul energy that he started with starts to be yanked from his body and it's siphoned right into Sindel's cocktail. Oh. Mm. Oh, that was good.

And we're just getting started. Kitana, my love. Yes, yes, Mother. Katana is standing at the buffet table, slicing a piece of butter off with her fan. Buttering a biscuit. Yes, Mother. You know, I thought, for such a wondrous occasion,

we could also make this a little bit of a family reunion. There's a reason why I don't go to these. Melina, my darling. Coming from the back, you see your twin sister, Melina. This family's fucked up. She looks strikingly like you. Mr. Molina. His family's fucked up. Yeah. She looks strikingly like you.

Almost identical. If it weren't for the tears in the corners of her cheeks, which is obscured by a maroon, almost fuchsia face mask. It matches her maroon, almost fuchsia face mask. It matches her maroon armor as she immediately draws her two sides. Melina looks over at Sindel. You know I've always wanted to impress you, Mother.

Without hesitating, she launches towards you. You know I've always wanted to impress you, Mother. Without hesitating. She launches towards you. I drop my fan. Buttercum's flying out. Makes the floor slippery. And I immediately block her hits with my two fans. I look at her and I say, Sister, it's been a long time. I see you haven't gotten any stronger.

And then just push her off. Enraged by this, she rips off her mask and spews black acid vial right to your face. Vial, not vial. Right into your face. It splashes up across you and it starts to burn and singe your neck and into your forehead.

Ah! Ah! Ah! She immediately pulls up her scythe and comes with a double attack. Katana starts blocking her attacks and, you know, no matter what you do, I will never be as ugly as you. And just keeps blocking her attacks. And, you know, no matter what you do, I will never be as ugly as you.

And just keeps blocking her attacks, pushes her off, and uses her back of her hand to wipe off the acid to stop whatever burning else to keep going. Melina knows that she has you on her back foot, and so she is just continuing to pummel you and is getting you backed into a corner before she leaps and does a spinning fan kick,

aiming right for your temple. I put one hand up, ready my blades, and just slice her right in her Achilles heel. Oh, incredible. It lands and you see, it slices almost perfectly through with your bladed fan tip and she lands,

but she doesn't realize at first that she has been hit in her Achilles. She takes another step back and her entire foot begins to rip off of her leg. She screams in agony, but cannot and will not be stopped with Mommy and Daddy watching. So she's lunging towards you again.

Kitana starts walking towards her, closes her fan so they're two big blades, jumps on her, wraps her legs around her waist, looks at Sindel and goes, You know, Mother, I have always been so tired of playing for your entertainment, and starts stabbing at her. Next time you want me around,

maybe send a message first so I'm dressed for the occasion, but also give me a better opponent, and just slaps her, or stabs her right in the neck. All sides. a better opponent and just slaps her right in the neck. I just take my plate and move it over. As you. You are carving away at her collarbone to where you can start to see chunks of bone flying out like shrapnel.

You do a massive sink of this killing blow, and it goes all the way through and ruptures out of her chest on the opposite side. As you rip away your fans, it's almost like an autopsy, like a surgeon's cut. As her skin is flayed open, exposing her rib cage, she stumbles backwards and collapses. Hmm.

You were always my favorite daughter, Sindel says. Plus, she forgot my birthday seven years ago and I will never forgive her for it. Kitana looks at Mileena, knowing that she can still hear with whatever life she has left, and goes, Did you hear that? I'm the favorite. And then saunters off.

Once again, Sandell's eyes widen, and you see her almost start to become sallowed in her expression as she reaches out and siphons the soul from her adopted daughter and pours it into her glass. Family really does come first, doesn't it? Truly.

And then turns around and just goes, and back to the buffet table. Reyn, I have a favor to ask you. You, Sindel, points at one of her guests. He is currently just eating a big piece of sausage from the Shao Kahn charcuterie. And he looks incredibly, incredibly taken aback

by the fact that he is just called out by the queen. Come to the center. As he walks forward, Sandel begins to describe a dream. You see, I was awoken last night. Just this terrible feeling, like this man, he must be Noob Saibot. He was the one who partnered me with Shao Kahn. And even when I tried to kill myself to get away from it,

I was resurrected. And then I died, and I was resurrected again, and then I was dead, and then I was resurrected again. And then I was turned into a revenant at one point, and then I was dead again. And I just can't help but feel this man is responsible. I know it's you, noob Saibot!

Kill him! Round one! Fight! The audacity of these mortals. Let's see what happens, noob, when you can't see your way and I reach into the aqueous humor of his eyes and pull the water out of the front of his face. Oh, God!

What was the name of that location? Oh my god! This man does not understand why he is here. He has his mouth still filled with sausages. He just goes, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! And ill-equipped to face any of the power and the might from anyone in this room.

You suddenly see as the entire moisture and the body of his cheekbones begins to be sucked dry, as his eyes are just ripped from their sockets and every fluid imaginable just gushes from his orifices. He is instantly dehydrated within a moment and collapses face down in the center of the room. Allow me, my queen, to make you a cocktail fitting of the occasion.

I pull the water from the fountain and I pour it all into the body and bloat him like a balloon. And then I pull that mixture out of every pore and dump it in a glass. Congratulations. I see someone here knows how to treat a lady. I mean, I would just,

Aperol spritzes are good, too. Aperol. Oh. Senel relishes in the moment. Hmm. Well, now. I think it's time to finalize my divorce. Raiden. Yes?

It would be my honor if you were the officiant, the closer of this ill-fated clause. She walks over to the table of her husband and immediately grabs the bonsai tree that is growing out of his throat and rips it forward, standing him forth onto his limbs.

She reaches through and removes the skewer from his mouth. You can see he's still conscious, as you can peer through his face to Sindel on the other side. She snaps him around and shoves him forward, sinking her claws into his shoulders, piercing till they bleed even further. She whispers in his ear,

It's been a pleasure, my love. And tosses him in your direction. I was ordained decades ago, but I'm sure my certificate has expired since then. But I'll do my best. Dearly hated, we are gathered here today The certificate has expired since then, but I'll do my best. Dearly hated, we are gathered here today to witness the separation of Siddal and Shao Kahn.

And I start to form a little rain cloud above Shao Kahn that starts to drizzle dramatically. This man, you will recognize him. He is the conqueror of realms, one of the most feared men in history. He is mere fraction of himself. All of his limbs battered and broken, he has no use of any of them.

His hammer that he normally wields is mounted behind Sindel, a trophy that she has already procured. He is dazed and standing in nothing more than an idle wobble. The classic. It feels good. Uh-huh. You see a little blue glow start to form in my hand

as my eyes flash white and I say, Shao Kahn, do you know what happens to a man when he's struck by lightning? And I'll sink into the floor and rise up right in front of him and go, they die. And I'll just put my hand in his chest. You see this arc of lightning and just start to rock his body.

For a second, the lightning is so strong that from everyone else's glance, it almost appears as if you can see the entire inner working of his skeletal structure as his skin flashes. And it's almost as if you have x-ray vision. You can see as these moments where you can see past his corporeal form, every organ in his body

that is still intact slowly ruptures one by one as the bolt completes its arc and emanates out from all of his organs, and he falls, merely a fried crisp, into the middle of the room. I'm a free woman. It feels good to be single again. Mm. Well, thank you all for your services.

Now that we have a little of that housekeeping done, why don't we get into what we're all really here for? That wasn't it? Let the tournaments begin! I thought it was also a tournament. We've got this timed for this. Okay, well. Everyone in the ballroom immediately clears backwards.

Sindel begins to reach, and with her powers, an arena forms, stadium seating bursts from the palace floors around her. Everyone who was there just gathering begins to take their seats in haste. All right. I would like you two to pair off teams. We're going to do a little 2v2 action.

Let's choose. Wait, wait, wait, before we choose, sorry, sorry, but if this is being broadcast on pay-per-view or an Eskod service or something, I'm going to need a cut. I'm going to need the right- Ticket sales? Ticket sales. Is there spinoffs? If there's merch?

I mean, we're going to get cut in on this, right? I will cut you in when I have your soul in my hands. Well, that's not going to happen, lady. My soul is, I don't think you could afford it, frankly. Well then, you'd better win. Not a problem. Do you want to?

Yeah, let's do this. Your family's fucked up. I like the way you look. Thank you, thank you so much. You're either very capable or very stupid. A little column A. A little column B. I'm an actor.

I'm both of those things all the time. I'm going to be doing some heavy lifting. Oh, we're a team then? Because I had my eye on Katana over there. I've spoken for, get it? These rights have been purchased. I'll cut you in two. And I mean in two.

All right, fine. Rain, was it? That's good, that's good. That's right. You know, a lot of excessive humidity does bad things to my hair, so if you could focus the moisture away from me, that would be ideal. I just summon another Ray of Clouds.

Oh, jeez! You know what? Why don't you let me take him? I'll do my best. Let's see how these pairs of champions fare. Don't worry if you lose. Death is not final. Now. Do it again. Rolled one!

Fuck! All right. We're going. We're going. You're doing good. I don't blame you, I don't blame you at all. All right. We're going. We're going. We're in combat. We are going to start our first official game of Till the Last Gasp. I would love to give a shout out really quick to the Darrington Press team,

who built special rules, a little bit of homebrew here, to really give us the Mortal Kombat experience. First and foremost being 2v2 battle. Normally this is a 1v1 game, but this is going to be a 2v2 match. We got our faces on this side. Katana and Rayden, you guys will be our faces

for the sake of clarity. And Johnny Cage and Reign, you will be our heels. We got this. Let's everybody roll for action points and initiative. Come on! Are you serious? Come on. Are you serious right now? Okay.

I'm going to do another decent. I rolled a one. No way! Oh my god. You rolled a one? We're okay, we're okay. In the bag. Do we also, do we choose our stance? Is that how we do this?

And yes, everyone, choose your stance. Okay, okay, okay. Wow, these are the worst rolls. All the other sessions. Well, it'll be a quick death. Let's spend a couple edge dice. Ooh, yeah, baby. Everything's in my favor today.

Is this how we start? This is real bad, real bad, real bad. Oh, you do. Oh, I'm far. I only have four action points. Shit, I'm dead. Oh no. We got this. I have more action points. Shit, I'm dead. Oh no. What? We've got this.

Now we're going to do Popcorn Initiative here. We will start, who had the highest roll on their d20? 15. 15? Eight. Okay, it looks like we'll be starting with Johnny Cage. I don't want to talk about it, man. I'm back in my home and I do not like it here. Check it out. Check it out.

Get in the bed and what's up. Johnny Cage will be starting us off and then how we're going to do this back and forth between the two teams. Johnny, you will basically be electing the person that you're going to be squaring off against and then the person on the team face that will be going next after you.

But first and foremost, let's start this off. Sindel just sits back down on her throne, has now two cocktails, thanks to Reyn, that she is double fisting. She's been day drinking all day. This is her fucking party. And she is incredibly excited to watch this fight.

All right. I'll take that once already. Okay, ready? At least two edges. Grab your style. Okay, I did that already. Okay, okay. So, sorcery and. Action cards. Okay, I'll I did that already. Okay, okay. So, sorcery and legitimate action cards.

Okay, I'll just do that one. It's easy. I'm going to land a hit on my foe. I'm going to rattle my foe into the defensive stance. Does that count as landing a hit on my foe? No. No, that is, rattling is a specific action. Then I'm not going to do that. Instead, I'm going to compel my foe? No. No, that is, rattling is a specific action. Then I'm not going to do that. Instead, I'm going to compel my foe to draw one drama. I'm going to head over to Katana.

I'm going to lower my shades and be like, let's dance, baby. And then you have to draw a drama card. Oh god, jeez. Katana looks at him and goes, I can see why I've never heard any of your movies before. Damn! It says here, lament what might have been

if things had been different in this life. Oh, okay. If anything's different. Well, sometimes I wish I had real parents, but here I am doing this bull. Ooh, I don't know if I can. This bull, just to entertain my mother. What is this, your fourth divorce?

Mm, it's depending on which universe, yes. Jeez. I still have some stuff that I left in my room I need to go pick up. You know, maybe one day, my love, you can meet your first father. The man that I originally married, the man that I chose,

whose name, this is a true story, was Jared. What? Yes. My dad's name is Jared? Yes, darling. Your dad's name was Jared. Jared. This is why name was Jared. Jared. This is why you don't ask questions.

You just don't want to know the truth. Is it still my turn? I keep going until I'm out of action points? No, you did one action, correct? I did one action, yes. Now you pick who on the other side you would like to see go next. I mean, I'll just say to Kitana,

I just wanted to fight you. I didn't need the whole therapy dump. But you know, that's cool too. I guess my presence sort of makes you feel like that, but why don't you go next? I'm ready for you. Wow. Amen.

All right, Katana readies her fans and says, let's see. I've seen what those do to butter. Okay. She looks at John and goes, Johnny, why don't we move to somewhere more comfortable? Yeah, baby. And she takes her fans

and she punches him in the throat with it, knocking him through the windows of the main hall here to the backyard. To the courtyard. Incredible. Where he crashes onto the ground and she steps out of the window. You want to get to know me a little bit better, sweetheart?

I do. So we will have a second marker tracker for you guys. As you ricochet, you take out several pillars of the palace in your process. Johnny, you have the wind knocked the fuck out of you as you land smack dab through some very well-carved sculpted bushes in right smack dab in the middle of an incredibly gorgeous courtyard.

You just hear the audience cheer and clap. Thank you, thank you. From the distance, you just hear Sendel laugh with Klee. And then whose go is it next? No, you did your action, so you get to, and then once again, if any of these

count towards your objectives, make sure you mark your objectives as you complete them. And then, Katana, you make a choice as to who you would like to see go next. Okay. She knows that Sundell's, her topiaries and her carved bushes are her most favorite things in the whole entire property.

So she starts slicing away at it. Like, you know what? Why don't you take a little while to get up? Wipe yourself off, you're bleeding. And she takes a little break, and then Reign can go, just doing some slicing over here. Not my peacock bush!

Peacock? So, in Great Hall... It's just you and me, Raiden. Suppose it, God of Thunder. Ooh. Earthrealm has been a thorn in my side, and you stand between me and my destiny, and that is why my realm will reign supreme.

Draw a drama card. Yes, draw one from the ones next to you first. So the foe draws a drama card. Oh, he's using courtyard action. Describe. Oh, yes. Describe. The Great Hall action? Oh, it is the Great Hall action, that's right. Why your realm is the best.

Each dragon is clear. Your realm shall triumph, and the Foe Draws One Drama. Offer to help your foe redeem themselves if they survive the duel. Oh, nice. It's very raid-intensive. I understand why you think your realm is the best,

but I promise you, if you survive this, you can redeem yourself by picking another color palette other than one that sucks up to Sindel. A little originality might help. Because you love purple. It runs in the family. And is that the action for Reign? That is the action for Reign.

So if that takes zero action points, does that still count as my action? I believe each combatant can do this once on their turn. I don't think so. I'm going to say that that's actually a free action. Let me check if that is correct. But I'll say I'm the GM and you can go ahead and do your action.

Okay, great. I'm going to spend two action points. I need neither your lip nor your mercy. Rain will fall like daggers from the sky, and I pull down water droplets that turn into blades. What? Ooh. Damn. That is incredible. That's pretty cool.

I feel a little bad I didn't think of that first. And with that, you start to hear the slight sound of rain that begins to ricochet around us. Oh, oh, oh. That would be cool, but ow, ow! Ow, ow, ow, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! So many!

It's really cool. Okay, and then Nishir, or rain, who would you like to see go next? So in this round, Raiden, I believe, is the only one that hasn't gone, right? Yeah, that's right. Bring it. So as I stand there in the dagger rain,

just getting absolutely annihilated, I'll say, Let's take this outside! And I will push forward and levitate off the ground and just fly straight for you and put both my hands in the middle of your chest and we explode out towards the courtyard, driving us to our comrades.

I'll spend two action points to land a hit on my foe. Amazing. Full classic Raiden fashion. You just see him go from vertical to horizontal as he slams into your chest, and you are jettisoned, once again, smashing through what pillars weren't already broken, thanks to Johnny Cage and Kitana,

and find yourself smacked right next to your partner. It does destroy the peacock bush, though, unfortunately, which means you also get some fan chops. Sindel looks at her now-destroyed bush and just goes, Flawless victory. A little tear falls into her champagne cup. Next, I'll turn my head to see what Johnny Cage is doing

as he looks at himself in his sunglasses. Yeah, I'm wiping off my sunglasses. Getting back into it, I've recovered. And I'm going to use the Courtyard action, spending two action points to describe how you impress or intimidate onlookers. A foe must draw one drama card or become rattled, so I will say, earlier, Katana,

you said you hadn't heard of my movies. Well, let me tell you what you're missing. Perhaps you've heard of the film Caged Rage. Oh jeez. Yes. Oh no. It earned over $10 million at the box office. Yes, it cost $100 million to make,

but we're going to make it up in streaming. I also made a great film about 10 years ago called Uncaged Beast, and then I've got a comedy coming out called Kindergarten Cage. Oh my god. It's a little departure from me, but if you've got nieces or nephews,

you can bring them to that. Anyway, I'm just saying, I've got a very deep resume. Maybe you should look me up on IMDb and that will impress you. Draw one drama card. Earthrealm stuff. Do we do something at the top of the round, by the way? Oh. A new round?

It's not a new round yet. It's not a new round yet. So that's our action points. Yes, you all have to, once everyone has depleted all of their action points, then we will move into the next round. Ah. That's right. I have completed one of my four objectives already.

Dang. Dang. Wow, wowzers. All right, my drama card says, call upon a power greater than your own for strength or guidance. The effect is Ready an Edge Die. Oh, okay, great. So yes, you get to pick one of those, yes.

I can put that anywhere? Correct. Okay, cool. Kitana stops with the topiary terrorism and Kitana stops with the topiary terrorism and looks over at Raiden and goes, Raiden, do you mind helping me out a little bit? Raises her fans into the sky. Like, you know that lightning thing that you do?

Oh, no problem. Grant me power! The lightning strikes, hits the metals of my blade on my fan. Cool. And goes, Sorry, never heard of those. Never want to.

I'm going to win you over, babe. And that'll be the sweetest victory yet. And then I've ready an edge die. Kindergarten Cage. is not a tumor. That was copyrighted. We had to do, it's not a boil. Oh god, not a boil. At this point, there is electric currents coursing through her fan, all the blades in her fan, like, oh, I like how this looks.

I like the lighting on me, too. Nice. Do you want to switch? Fantastic. And then that was your turn, correct? That's my turn. So who do you want to see go next? Oh, let's go over to Rayden. My turn.

I am going to spend two action points and I'm going to change my stance to wary. Okay. Seems like a very weak move. Well, look, I'm going to call out to- For a weak old man. I'm going to call out to Rain, who's got, you know, bush shit in his hair.

I feel like, come, come, hey, bro, bro, come on. Let's get it together. The party's on. And I will Motion to Rain. I've been waiting for this. Yes. So.

Storm God versus Storm God, let's go! Let's go! All right, I'm going to... I think this courtyard could use a little redecorating. I summon the clouds, I draw down the water, and then I blast the entire courtyard with lightning. I scorch all the bushes. I char everything around into black ash.

Oh my god, amazing. I just read my resume. Your move is slightly cooler. Oh, and the kid goes for this in the Staples of Headshots. The lightning ricochets throughout the courtyard and ends up arcing all the way to the palace walls as it goes inside

of where the audience is watching and creates this arc lightning almost in the top of the palace for a second as a giant kaboom cracks, causing the entire arena to shudder for a minute. Very impressive. All right, and how's everyone doing on action points? I'm out.

Out. You're out? You got three? I have three left. Okay, so it's still between the two of you. Katana. Okay. Katana notices everything is burnt to an ash and says, Ugh, mother's pissed. You know what?

Let's make some more destruction happen in this house. And then she looks over at Johnny Cage and said, Johnny, remember how earlier I just threw you around and thrashed you around a little bit? I liked it, baby. What do you say we recreate that scene? And she shoves her two fans into his ribcage and tosses them over to spend two hit points

to move him to the Sky Bridge. All right. Oh man. We are traveling. Thrown around! Moves him over to the sky bridge. He's like, let's make some more trouble. And just drags, or she tosses him over by his ribs and walks over to join him. Beyond just tossing him over,

the sky bridge is actually elevated a little bit above the courtyard on what would be more or less the second story. So as you jettison him out from your fans, Johnny, you end up crashing upwards into this top level of the Skybridge. Oh shit. She looks over at Johnny and says, You know, terrible actor, but maybe great stunt double.

Oh! That cuts deep. He ain't got no comeback for that one! You ain't seen nothing yet, baby. I'm just trying to show you. I do my own stunts when they're safe enough to perform. That's deep. He ain't got no comeback for that one! You ain't seen nothing yet, baby. I'm going to show you. I do my own stunts when they're safe enough to perform. Nothing car-related or jumping off of anything.

No! Car-related. All right. Can't do much here that can help my goals here. Destroy scenery, land a hit on your foe. I'm going to destroy scenery. Land a hit on your foe. I can't do any of those things, so I'm just going to rattle her.

I'm going to spend the rest of my action points and I'm going to rattle her. So I'll hang down. Where am I? I'm up on the sky bridge. And where are you? I'm standing, I'm walking up right next to you on the elevated sky bridge.

Okay. I pull myself up right next to you on the elevated skybridge. Okay. I pull myself up, shake all the shit and dust off of myself, and I'm going to rattle you to a defensive stance, and I'm going to do it in the most shocking way possible. I'm going to be like, listen, if you don't know me, that's fine, but this is going to be worth something someday,

and I'm going to be worth something someday. And I'm going to pull out one of my many... One of my many pictures. That's an autograph photo of Johnny Cage. That's going to be worth a lot one day, babe. So hang on to that. Put it up. To my greatest fan. To my greatest fan. Is that a joke? No, that's you.

It's going to be soon. It's going to be true. Seriously? Yeah, you've got fans, and now I've got fans. Ugh! She picks it up with two fingers. Wow. You're now rattled to any, oh, to the defensive stance. It's really good.

It's really good. I'm going to give you that one. She replies by grabbing it with two fingers, just disgusted look on her face, like, huh, must be a very, very, very, very old picture. Ooh. It's just, ugh. Just drops it on the side there. It's lighter than the protective box, right? Nobody can see. Yeah. Just drops it on the side there. Just like the protected by turn.

I'm out of action points, it's all you. I'm all out. You are all out of action points. All right, we are moving into... Round two! Fight! So we get to replenish one... So you all automatically replenish one edge die.

Oh, I almost reached into my floor. And we can't change stances, right? You cannot change stances. Or no, you can change stances at the top of the round. Oh, then I'm going to change to bold. So we change our stance before we choose where our edge die goes, I'm assuming? You can ready your edge die anywhere, I believe,

but whatever stance that you want to choose, you can only roll edge dice from that pool. Correct. Thank you. Okay, I rolled a five. That gives me two action points. And I'm going to do all of my edge dice to add on.

Five, two, one. Awesome. Better. Better. Huh. Better. We're going down, faces. Okay, who has the highest initiative? I rolled a five. I rolled a five. 16.

Nice. Oh, looks like Raiden. I rolled a five. 16. Nice. Ooh, looks like Raiden. Yeah, because Nashir got an eight. All right, Raiden, you are kicking us off for round two. Round two. I am only going to spend... Ooh! Yeah, I'm going to spend two action points,

and I am going to drop into the floor and appear right next to Johnny Cage and reach up for the sunglasses, and at the last minute, What would you do? I wouldn't. I slip my fingers, my thumbs behind the sunglasses and into his eyes

and just start pumping him full of lightning. And then I front kick him, boom, sending him backwards. Not only does he lightning blast your eye holes, it reverberates through your skull, and Johnny, you can feel fractures begin to crack and form in your cranium as he shatters the inside of your head.

Oh my god! This feels like the time I got a second callback for Hurt Locker. For they gave it to that asshole instead. Hurt Locker. They gave it to that asshole instead. Hurt Locker! No! But I recovered then and I can recover now. You do.

Great, and I'll give the floor to Mr. Cage for a rebuttal. All right, I'm coming for you. I am going to attack. I'm going to, I'm just going to attack. I'm going to land a hit on your foe and let them describe, oh, they describe the injury. So I'll just say that I run up and say, I haven't gotten to fight yet, so it's time to show you bozos,

how we do it down in Hollywood. And I'm going to run up the side of the wall, if there is one, I guess we're on a bridge. Yes, you all are both. So that would have meant you, if you were fighting Johnny Cage, you both would move. Oh, you've moved to the bridge. Oh yes, okay.

Causing rain to have to chase after you as well. So you all are both on this bridge with all of the rain and lightning gods in full force. You're completely exposed as a battering rain cloud is pelting you from above. If the bridge is slick, I'm going to run up to get closer to Raiden, and I'm going to jump up and slide across the wet rail,

or along the wet rail, and as I get close to him, I'm going to jump off the rail and go in for a flying punch. But as you, it's tricky. It's like a visual trick. When I'm in the air, you think for a second, is that him anymore? And no, it's not.

It's like my stunt double. He's in the air. Just for while I'm in the air, and then I connect, and then it's me again. I'm in the air, and I connect, and then it's me again. Amazing. It's an incredible trick. I'm overtaken by the stunt double person imposing, and then because of the recent damage to your eyes,

your targeting is also a little low, so you react to your favorite target, which is, again, my groin, and your fist just slams into my crotch. Oh! As you hear the impact, the sky thunders. I didn't realize how tall you were. Oh!

That was awesome. Oh. Oh, dear. And I'll kick it to Katana next. Okay. Katana turns around and sees that you two have joined us on the bridge. She looks over at Reign and says, Neat little trick you had there.

I just want to let you know, though, you're really not her type and I'm not looking for a new daddy. That's three hit points to rattle your foe into a reckless stance. One, two, three. There you go. I've completed two of my objectives.

Dang. Same. Hey, ooh, you're going down. At this point, in order to make sure she has a front row seat to all the action, you all catch out of the periphery of your vision. Sindel still appears to be seated as she was on the throne, but she is levitating as she holds her coop

and just watches on the edge of the bridge. And with that, she looks over at Reyn and just watches on the edge of the bridge. And with that, she looks over at Reign and just... weak. Looks off. All right. Tossing it to Reign. Okay. Come on, Reign. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. Finish him!

Let's see what we can do here. Okay. Come on, Reign. Finish him! Let's see what we can do here. Okay. I smirk, draw the water onto the sky bridge, and using that water like a wave, I ride it into a shoulder check into Katana and knock her straight into the living quarters. Oh, amazing.

Katana, you go flying. Once again, you get blasted through a wall. You're not even entirely sure how far you have just been flung as you smash into a very lush living room, almost like a lounge. There's nice throw pillows and floor pillows, jewel tones and amazing beading and curtains that make this really just a lovely oasis

under literally any other conditions. Kitana flies through the wall, lands onto a bunch of very tacky, gaudy throw pillows, gets up and dusts herself off and says, I've always hated this room. Nobody needs that many pillows. Don't worry. Once I move in, Daddy's going to redecorate. Oh!

Oh, shit! This is so personal. That finishes your turn. Yes, Reign? Yes. Who are you tossing it over to? And then, Reign, that would be you following Katana, I believe, into the living quarters. Yeah.

Who would you like to have on team, go next. My less competent older version. My predecessor. That's fine. I will... Johnny and I are still out in the Skybridge. Just you and me. I will spend one action point to draw a drama. Compliment your foe.

No! For someone who does their own stunts, you look surprisingly handsome. No, wait. For someone who does their own stunts, you're ugly. No, wait. For someone who does their own stunts, you're ugly. Oh, no. I hate you.

I'll take that as a compliment. You know, they say no press is bad press. I was waiting for it. I knew you were going to say that. But I can change my stance to any protective stance by spending an additional action point. You're going into the protective stance? Yeah.

I knew it. Can't hang. I'll send it back to Mr. Cage. Mr. Cage, all right. Mr. Cage, enjoying the compliment, wants to make sure that his hair is intact. So he's going to reach out and smash the glass of the Skybridge,

I'm assuming there's glass, with my bare hand. Be like, ah, god, it hurts. I'm going to take a piece of glass and just admire myself in the mirror for a second and just fix my hair. That's destroying scenery. Oh! And I mark off the thing. Fantastic.

Okay. Then I'm going to hold out the shard of glass as a weapon on my next attack. I'm going to kick it to you, Katana. You're up. All right, so Katana gets up and she's dusting herself off with her fans, making sure to slice any pillows on the way,

just in case, oops. Just fluff and down feathers just start to poof around you. And I'm using two action points to convert. You and your foe each draw one drama card. There we go. Who's your foe? It's going to be rain. Who's your foe? It's going to be Reign.

Let's see, I'm going to pull one. That is an objective card. This is a drama card. Grazie. Okay. Oh. Compliment your foe sincerely. Yeah, right? These are the hardest ones.

These are so hard. The words, you can tell, it's like poison dripping out of her mouth. She hates every second of this and goes, at least you have the color scheme down correct. Ugh. Hideaway kind of fans. The purple loyalty of this family.

That's unbelievable. There's so much purple loyalty. What's your drama card? Tell your foe about something terrible that could happen if they die today. Oh. Oh. Brutal. Shao Kahn's unfortunate end

leaves a power vacuum in this house. If I move in and you aren't here to protect her, Melina will fall to my influence. And then what do you think happens to this realm? She wasn't always the brightest. Fine. Then I shall fight my hardest. He just looks at you and raises her hands.

Damn. The heal team is really leaning into it. Yeah, this is brutal. How are we doing on action points? I have one left. Three more. Three over here. Okay, so we are still going. We are still thick in this round.

Thick. Thick. That was Mileena's turn? Katana's turn. Yes, that was Katana's turn, yeah, yeah, yeah. Then I will... Katana looks over out the window. The fight on the skybridge catches her eye

and she kicks it over to Johnny Cage. Johnny Cage says, I want to be where the people are. So I'm going to use the action of the lair action. I'm going to spend two action points to move the duel to an adjacent area and change your stand to Quick, if you wish. Sure, I wish.

Do I wish? Let me see. What can Quick give me? So here's one of the lairs. Sure, I'll change my stance and I'll grab Raiden. Let's... Oh! I can't be in this much rain. It's going to ruin my outfit.

The makeup's starting to go. That's just a foundation. Oh, yeah. I don't need it. I'm just... They should really say that. I had a photo shoot earlier today, all right? So I grab him and just slide him on the slick floor over the sky bridge into the living quarters. Okay.

I'll strut my way over there, kicking through the door. Dang. Looking awesome as I go. Awesome, you join your partners. Reiden, it's your turn, go. Amazing. When you throw me, I glide on my heels in the back

and then I start breakdancing in the water. As I reach my place, I'll use three action points to rattle Johnny Cage with my smooth moves into a defensive stance. Go ahead, brother. I start popping and locking in the water. Come and face me if you dare. I'll throw a two rain for the next turn.

Oh my god, I've never seen an old man move like that. Ella, Ella, Ella, eh, eh, eh. I'm rattled. I'm rattled. I'm super rattled. I dropped to one knee and just mesmerized by the dance. Have you ever done any acting?

Any performing? You're a natural. I never thought about it. Could you introduce me to somebody? No! Oh! Son of a bitch! That was your turn?

That was my turn. Yes. Uh-huh. My turn was to rattle, and I throw to rain. And throw it back to rain, all right. Okay. Ah. Shit. I can't complete my objectives now because you rattled me. Oh!

It's a tactic! Wondering. That's great. I was wondering. Shit. Johnny, to add insult to injury, because you were coated in rain and you just got flung into this living quarters where there was a bunch of downed feathers and fluff, you are now just have all these goose feathers

that are starting to stick to your skin. All right. I'm out of action. What you got? You're out as well? All right. What you got, Reign? So. I tire of teenage angst. It's about time that you and I had a face-off.

As Raiden gets up from his breakdancing B-boy moves, I come in with a flying lariat and slam right into his throat and knock both of us back into the sky bridge. Raiden, you can feel your jaw crack as three molars just explode from the side of your face and that punch launches you back onto the sky. Oh shit!

You land hard on a pile of glass that was left behind by Johnny Cage, furthering your injuries. Damn. Okay. And then who do you? There's action points I can free you guys. They both left. They do.

Okay. Well, Katana, take it away. You're out? All right, back to Katana. Okay. I have one action point left, so I'm just going to expend it to destroy scenery. Katana gets up and she says, I am sick of this place.

You know what? Let's make this more fun. Oh, Mother! Yes, darling? Isn't make this more fun. Oh, mother. Yes, darling. Isn't that your favorite painting of you where it looked so fat and you hung it up anyways? And then she runs over, or no, she stands back and she starts throwing her fans and it's spinning in like a Frisbee and it keeps on,

it spins, it comes back, just shink, shink, shink, just shredding the painting apart. I told you not to, or I told you to delete that! And it's just flying, and then the painting's just getting shredded. Remember, darling, mothers are just a sign of where you're headed. Oh jeez.

The darkest time of the year. Ugh! Spending my last points. I was just going to use my last action point to ready an edge dice. So that's it. Ready an edge dice. Super easy. All right. What you got in here?

All right, I got two points left. Oh, you got two points. All right, Reina's going to close us out. So we landed on the sky bridge. Only one of us can carry this pantheon. I jump and double foot land on his chest, kick him and use that aerial launch to basically pull lightning onto the sky bridge

and electrocute the whole circuit while I'm in the air. Oh. Raiden, you just feel your sternum collapse under the weight of his knee and is pushing you into this electrical circuit that vibrates around you. However, you are God of Thunder yourself, so it doesn't kill you, but man, that sucks.

Oh, that was pretty good. What little glass was left from Johnny Cage, the rest of it is just shattered as glass is flying through the air past all of y'all's vision. The Sky Bridge is almost entirely destroyed. Anybody else have action plans? No. That's it.

Oh, that's it. Oh, that's it. All right. Then we move into round three. Round three. Everyone refresh an edge die and roll for action points. And choose your stance. Come on, baby.

All right, okay. We're in round three, yeah? Correct. All right. I got a seven. Unfortunately. That's two points. Are you kidding me? A quicksand. Christ.

Helps, yeah. Okay. Fuck, I'm going to spend all, yeah. Okay. Fuck, I'm going to spend all of them. Yep. Oh wow, great rolls. Fubed. It's all out.

Six, five, and five. We're going to have a conversation. I want a new Deedswuddy. Are you looking on objectives? Ooh. I'm almost done with my third objective. Okay. Same.

And I rolled a seven. Okay. All right, we're getting close here. Seven, who rolled the highest? Eight, 12. All right, Reign, you are kicking us off. It's like rain! On your bedding, death!

So it's Rayden and I on the Skybridge. Correct. What's left of the Skybridge. Correct. Reign, if I may, when you do this next move, whatever it is, just cheat out a little bit. Oh boy. Oh boy. Think the cameras are over there? I can't be sure, but the cameras are out there, so just cheat out a little bit. Oh boy. Think the cameras are over there? I can't be sure, but the cameras are out there,

so just cheat out a little bit when you do it. The mask doesn't help, but this is my good side. Oh, I can tell. I don't think that was nice. I'm going to... I'm so tired of this stupid sky bridge. I channel the water that's already on the bridge and I surge the water that's on the ground from all this rain and I meld it to the bridge

and I basically try to tear the bridge off the moorings, Raiden, me, everyone, and bring it crashing to the ground. This bridge is already so weak and structurally destroyed that as the lightning bolts hit the remaining corners, the entire bridge shakes, and as still one solid piece that you're standing on, the whole bridge plummets out from under you, the two of you going with it.

It lands with a heavy impact right next to the courtyard below. So still on the bridge-ish, but it is demolished. Damn. Give me your best, old god. My turn? Yo. Yeah. Well, Raiden's going to stand after having had

a bridge dropped on his ass. He's going to stand up and say, Yeah, it's been a millennia since I broke a bridge, and I'm going to spend one action point to destroy scenery. And I'm going to kick a planter. You're going to wish you hadn't done that. I'm going to tell Johnny Cage. Johnny Cage.

I'm in the living quarters with Kitana, right? I will say with that, you guys, because it is just so destroyed, you guys are now going to, you basically fell back into the courtyard, which is where the two of you are. As Reign, you narrowly avoid a flying terracotta pot directly towards the sides of your head. I'm in the living quarters with Katana, yeah?

Yes, you are. And where are we? Are we in a bedroom, a living room? What is a living room? It's a living room lounge, so there's a lot of really chic throw pillows, floor pillows, elaborate curtains. It's got some almost Moroccan-style lanterns

hanging from the ceiling. Gotcha. She goes to Morocco once, and this is how our house looks like. You're from Atlanta, okay. That one person who goes to Barcelona. I'm going to just take a second and be like, wow, it's really classy in here.

I like it. It's really fancy. Mind if I snap some pics from my house? Oh, dude. Oh god. Nice. It's like world market stuff. Yeah. It's good.

White woman who thinks she's cultured. There's a reason it's a tin painting. Anyway, I'll just turn to Katana and be like, we're alone, babe. Oh my god. I'm going to spend... I can do a flex action to destroy scenery. There's lots of scenery destroying in this game.

And I'm going to run up to the velvet curtains and rip them down and rip off my shirt and wrap myself in the velvet curtains like a robe. I'm going to lie down on the lounge chair and just sort of beckon you forward. Come on, baby, let's see what you got. And I'll throw it to you, Kitana. So Carol, burn out of you.

Kitana sees, upon seeing this, goes pale and just. Oh. And I would like to spend two action points to compel your foe to draw. Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You and your foe each draw one drama card. Drawing the drama.

Yeah. I got question your foe's moral character. Go for it. Oh god, okay. Question a moral character. She looks at Johnny and says, You know, you don't seem too bad. I bet sometimes you sit at home by yourself

and you wonder to yourself, is this what I really want people to think of me as? Are my movies that great? Why do I act this way? When's the last time I talked to my therapist? Do I do acting because I just want to pretend to be someone else and not myself for once? Stop it.

You're really killing the vibe in here. Why do I have to be sorry? Stop, okay? I'm supposed to express disappointment in your choices. Oh, okay. So I will just say back to you, listen, I don't need this brutal honesty from you. I pay people to shield me from that kind of stuff.

Just less talking, more fighting, okay? Man, you're really bumming me out. Here, I'm going to go on IMDb and see what my star meter says. Okay, I'm still in top 5,000. I. Here, I'm going to go on IMDb and see what my star meter says. Okay, I'm still in top 5,000. I'm okay, I'm okay. You're okay, Johnny Cage, you're okay. Okay, so I have four action points

and I've completed all three. So what does that mean I can do? Nothing this round. Oh no, it's third round. Yeah. Third round. I've also completed three objectives. Okay. Oh, that's right. But we got to wait till the fourth round. Oh no, it's third round. Yeah. Third round. I've also completed three objectives. Okay. Oh, that's right. But we got to wait till the fourth round. You need four mission points, right?

And she, with a terracotta, or when she's done doing that, a terracotta pot just flies past her, crashing into the wall next to her. It's still kicking shit. It's still kicking shit. And least he's quick to play it. She just looks at it and goes, what the hell was that?

Then looks out to the skybridge, kicking it over to Reign. Nice. All right. I'm so behind on these objectives. Yes. Oh no. Man, next round is going to be a race for the- It just depends on who rolls better, right?

Pretty much. Whoa! Oh boy, bro. I've been rolling, too. We're just, what's the stakes? The stakes are just to defeat. Oh, right. Currently, the stakes have not been risen in any way. So yeah, it's just to defeat at this moment. I just want to raise the stakes.

Who does want to raise the stakes? I believe there are drama cards that indicate that. Okay. Hey, who's going? I think it's my turn, and it's me and Raiden in the courtyard. Yeah! We're more similar than I care to admit,

but the one thing I hate about you is your prattling on and on about the forces of good and these mortals. It's about time you stop talking. I start to take the water in his lungs and fill it. Oh! Like a terrible case of pneumonia, you start to feel your body drowning

on its own bodily fluids. In an effort to get away from my aqua lung, I'll spend two action points to change my stance to quick and achieve an objective, even though I'm woefully behind. And I'll pop up behind Reyn, and I'm like, The thing is, good people are the way forward in this world. And I will hear it any other way.

One more time, one and LAURA, SAM and LAURA, One more time. One more time, man. SAM and LAURA, Enunciate, my friend. All right, I'll draw it to Luke Cage. Luke Cage. Luke Cage. Luke Cage, no. Johnny Cage. Johnny Cage.

Johnny Cage is going to step gracefully, moving the duel to an adjacent area. Come with me, lady. Let's go outside. I'm going to take her hand and I'm going to jump out the window all the way to the courtyard, but as soon as we hit the air.

It's a long jump. I know it's a long jump, but I've got special effects to help me. Oh my god! As soon as we hit the air, I know it's a long jump, but I've got special effects to help me. Oh my god! As soon as we get outside, you realize wires are suddenly attached to you. Oh, wonderful!

And we gracefully, slow motion, they'll speed this up in post, it'll look amazing. It's very slow and we land and I'll be like, do a three-point landing when we hit the ground. Trust me, it'll be awesome., do a three-point landing when we hit the ground. Trust me, it'll be awesome. And I land three-point landing. With the sky bridge being destroyed and you just describing it in an amazing way,

you do float all the way from the sky bridge back to the courtyard, and then for just no reason, a massive explosion just pops off. Don't look back, don't look back. From the living room quarters. Don't put in the scene. It just happens fucking to us. reason, a massive explosion pops off. Don't look back, don't look back. Don't look back, don't look back. Don't look back, don't look back.

It just happens fucking to us. And the pillows. And the pillows. As we're flying through the air, Katana just looks over at a PA and says, Who the fuck is that? Get out of her eye line! Shot! Get out of her eyeline! Shut up!

You got a guy in just like all blacks and a baseball cap who's like holding a boom mic and he's like... He's been there the whole time and you don't know why. It's these non-union guys. Sindel doesn't hire union guys.

Nope, I got those busters. Also, in addition to any type of drama cards that can and do raise the stakes, you all can elect to just raise the stakes on your own, whenever you wish. Do we spend any action points to do so? I believe it just happens. We just do it. Yeah.

What does to exile mean again? They're banished. You're banished. I'll banish. At least that would be very hard to do during this game, though. We can justify anything. Sure. Okay, so Kitana lands with Johnny Cage. I would like to spend two hit points,

or two action points to land a hit on your foe. And they describe the injury. She lands with Johnny Cage, rips her hands out of his hand, and I would like to spend two hit points, or two action points to land a hit on your foe. And they describe the injury. She lands with Johnny Cage, rips her hands out of his hand and goes, don't touch me with your filthy hands. And then she reaches into, or somewhere behind her, and holds up-

Your video game pocket. Yeah, my video game pocket, my bag of holding. Holds up his headshot and goes, you call this a headshot? It's an inch away from his face. And as he's focusing on it, her fan goes right through it. Right through his mouth.

The photo, and into his mouth, the blade sticking out behind. And then she yanks it out. A hole in the picture now and says, You should probably update this. You're lying to the people. I hurt. Do you have any other descriptors you want to add to that?

I'm clearly bleeding from lots of places, but I take out, from my video game pocket, I take out a bandage and some makeup and I just sort of tidy up so that no one can see it. And I get one of those cold things that actors put under their eyes to put a swell. I put those on there to cool it down.

It's going to swell a lot! Oh, there's inflammation, baby. Fantastic. Then she flicks the blood off of her fan, fixes her hair, and she looks over to Reign. I have zero action points. You are done. Ooh. It's up to have zero action points. You are done.

It's up to, I guess, me. Do you have action points? Okay, just you? All right, yeah. Raiden, do you have any left? I do. All right. I'm so close to my goals, I'm just going to burn through my action points here. Okay.

And use them all to just change to a bold stance. And look at the two of you remaining and just be like, bring it on, guys. I think I've got something really special for you cooked up in the next round. I'll take inspiration from that invitation and from Reynn's previous attack and I'll walk over to my smited planter that I kicked earlier,

and I'll step on it and crush the porcelain pieces into little bits, and I'll pick it up and go, here's some daggers in return. You'll see a burst of air, and all the planter shards go, and they shoot out towards you, and you get to describe the injury. Oh!

Terracotta shards go flying through the air, puncturing through my robe. I try to defend them by putting my wand between myself and Raiden and it's not working. They go through my arm, through my body, out the other side, and I fall to my knees. This blood just starts pouring from these small holes that are slowly widening and turning into a sea of red.

It says you're already soaked from the rain. It just starts to bleed and wick through your robe even more as it almost looks like you just got hit by a shotgun blast propelled by thunder. My action points. All right. I have three left. Ooh, back to Katana. I would like to expend expends my action points. All right. I have three left. Ooh, back to Katana. You're the only one, yeah.

I would like to expend all of my action points, my remaining three, to destroy scenery. At this point, Katana knows what Johnny Cage's powers and weakness is and realizes without his cast and crew, he's nothing, and she throws both fans, and they are spinning blades, and decapitates the whole entire crew as it's flying.

Whoa! And then. Unnecessary! Especially his agent, and it comes back to her hands. She goes, So much for that martini shot. We're done here. Even the ocean guy.

You killed my agent? Joke's on you. You just saved me 10%. Oh! As we hear the thud of a bunch of poor Teamsters that didn't want to be there, shout out to all of our friends at IOTSE. Oh, sorry! We love you.

We are now moving into... Final round! What?! Final round! Okay, it's all up to this dice roll. All up to the dice roll. Oh, we get to replenish one dice? Yes. Oh, and you can replenish. What?!

You can replenish. Oh! This is so bad! Oh god, oh please, please. I've only rolled about off a 10 once! Oh! These pumpkin dice are killing me! Okay. Oh, thank god!

One. Whiff. And you can reset your stance if you like. One, one. This is it. Cool. It all comes down to this die roll. Can I just choose to be rattled? Just rattled from shit dice roll. Just instantly.

Who rolled the highest? I got 11. Four. 18. 15. Ooh! All right. Team Heal is going to be kicking us off with rain.

And remember, as part of this as well, All right, Team Heal is going to be kicking us off with rain. And remember, as part of this as well, you've already readied your dice, but you can also elect to hand your ready dice to your teammate if you'd like. How do we do this? Because he got higher than me, but I'm the one who can finish. Oh wait, you can finish this?

Ooh! So we're all team-made for it. I've been sleeping on it. higher than me, but I'm the one who can finish. Oh wait, you can finish this too! Amazing, damn. So we're all team-made for it. I've been sleeping on it. Okay, do it, man. All right. They call this spectator sport for a reason. I reach out and I pull the water through the blood of every single onlooker in the crowd.

I pull, it turns into an audience of raisins. through the blood of every single onlooker in the crowd. I pull, it turns into an audience of raisins. And I take that blood, I turn it into a massive swimming pool-sized volume, and then I drop it on top of them and there's nowhere for them to go. And then I crush that blood so that that water takes on density, and they're starting to crush smaller and smaller as that weight gets heavier and heavier.

You just hear the audible screams of the audience in a cacophonous roar as they slowly start to drop dead one by one. Sindel just smirks, very pleased with your action. You all feel this density of intense pressure, like you're under 3,000 feet of water, as every bone and organ in your body begins to crack, until essentially, the pressure becomes too much,

and you are more or less vaporized. until essentially the pressure becomes too much and you are more or less vaporized. No, no, no! Fatality! Oh! Nicely done, Reign. Maybe we should do a buddy cop movie. Reign and Cage, Cage and Reign. Cage Reign. Cage and Reign.

Cage and Reign. Ooh! That's a three-pointer. Do you have any accents? I'll learn, I'll learn. Yeah. I do declare. On the fire.

On the fire. You hear the sound of stiletto heels clacking on porcelain, on tile, as Sindel walks into her beloved courtyard, completely marred and destroyed by this battle. That was quite entertaining, gentlemen. She looks over at the smeared bloodstains of the Thunder God and her daughter.

She takes a deep breath in, her nostrils flare as you see her sallowed face fill as the souls, once again, lift and emanate from the blood puddle and pour into her glass. once again, lift and emanate from the blood puddle and pour into her glass. I feel so refreshed when you know the part and the point of these tournaments

is really to have one man standing. The two of you are up next in a 1v1 battle. The two of you are up next in a 1v1 battle. Shake hands now, boys. I'm sorry, I'm going to have to end your reign. Shake hands now, boys. I'm sorry, I'm going to have to end your reign. I guess you'll die on screen for the first time. I'll probably get an Oscar for it.

Damn it! Now, because I am such a generous hostess, I will allow you a summon, a cameo. Cameo? Do I get money to record messages for people? It's an under five. Okay.

Fortunately, not up for a voucher. But you will each be able to choose whom tag teams in from your fellow comrades. You mean the dead ones? The dead ones. From Sindel's cup, you hear me go, bloop. Yes. She swirls it, bloop. Yes. She swirls it, gives it a little sniff. Bloop, bloop, bloop.

I guess you're probably going to want the Thunder Rain guy because you're the Thunder Rain guy, too. I don't know. Is that how that works? Or you want something different? I think the idea of mother fighting on my side, rather daughter fighting on my side, is rather poetic. All right, I'll take Raiden. It makes sense, I don't like to work with anyone

who's better looking than me. Oh boy. You hear another bloop and she's saying, oh, thank god. The choice has been made. Follow me. She turns heel and begins to walk out of the courtyard to what will be your next battleground, which we will pick up on after this break.

Oh, my! Thank you for listening to the Critical Role Podcast Network. This is Marisha Ray, Critical Role's resident creative director, with a quick reminder for you. We take the last Thursday of every month off from our typical Campaign 3 adventures. Some months we'll enjoy a short rest, and others we'll air a one-shot or just try something new. Since this year's podcast feed is on a one-week delay from our initial broadcasts, that means the first Thursday of the month

may look a little different around here. To stay up to date on our latest programming happenings and when our shows will air on Twitch, YouTube, and here on the Critical Role Podcast Network, check out our weekly programming schedule published to critrole.com every Monday at 10 a.m. Pacific. And now that you're sufficiently reminded, let's get back to the show. Thanks again to WB Games for sponsoring this episode.

Now let's get back to Mortal Kombat! Welcome back. The combat continues. Both spelled with Ks. Combat with a K. Welcome back. The combat continues. Both spelled with Ks. Combat with a K. Yes, combat and continue with a K. Don't edit their dumb. Don't do it.

No, no. Only two Ks. No, only two Ks. This is a 2K zone. Paper's a leg. You continue to hear the clacking of heels against tile floor as Sindel leads the gentleman into her Hanging Garden. Ooh.

You know, I would often come here to contemplate my existence, why I was resurrected so many times. And I could never escape the crushing feeling that something is lingering in the back of my brain. Something that I couldn't control. Something that wasn't quite mine. Almost as if my soul belonged to someone else.

Even in the happiest moments with Shao Kahn, it was a farce, an illusion. Steep down inside, I knew I was correct. My soul never belonged to me. It was always tightly wrapped around his finger. Now I know, By that logic. Souls are simply commodities. Useful to more than just the single person

they're assigned to. Shang Tsung knew this. And it's always smart to learn from your enemies. Let me demonstrate. And she summons her glass that has the swirling souls of Katana and Raiden. And with a flick of her finger,

you see them rise and dart, like shooting stars before the two of you have apparated again. Oh, the white hair is back. Yeah, baby. You smell like sherry. Ugh. What happened?

It's hard to tell. It's really only visible to the two of you, and is really only visible to the two of you, ever so slightly if you squint, this faint line, this thread that seems to connect you to the summons that you chose. Their souls are yours,

at least for this battle. A soul tethered to me, unable to make its own decisions? Sounds problematic. Sounds familiar. I made that deal when I signed on to do Planet of the Cage. Oh my. My agent said it was going to be a big hit. I was going to make 30 grand on it.

But they wanted me to do all this press and all the sequels, and I was tied into that contract for years. I know exactly what you feel right now, buddy. I don't think you do. I look over at Reign, noticing that we are tethered together, and a moment of hesitation, and then she looks over at Johnny.

Back to Reign, she goes. And so we fight. And readies herself. And so we do. This garden, gifted to me by Shao Kahn. It's nice. You thought about putting in an infinity pool? I think. I could give you my pool guy's number.

What a lovely idea. Seems it will need some demolition. Hmm. Round one. Fight! Fight. Roll your action points! Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go. Lucky 13.

Oh! Nine. Yeah. Okay, I get three points for that. I'm going to take the quick stance and I'm going to roll two edge dice already. Six and a one. Ooh! Boop, boop, boop.

I got six action points ready to go. Damn, that is a good roll. Okay, that's not bad. And we have new objectives. You have new objectives. And as an action, you can spend just one action point to summon your cameo. All right, Reign. You can also,

before we get started, sorry, just as a reminder, it is not necessary, but you are also allowed to take one of your edge die and gift it to your cameo if you wish to soup them up a little bit more. But as always, that would have to be done at the top of the round. You want to do a dance,

maybe sing a song for your cameo. Do a slice of poetry. Happy birthday! All right, new objectives. Sindel lounges in a lounge chair just underneath some hedge ranges. Entertain me, mortals! That's what I was born to do, babe.

And I think I will summon my cameo right away. Reign, you're going to fail. You're going to lose. I'm going to beat you like Jake Gyllenhaal beat me for that role in End of Watch. Why? Why? Why? It was this close. It was so specific.

It was this close. The producers liked me a lot, but It really wasn't. they wanted a bigger name. But in a different way. Anyway, I'll spend one action point and summon my cameo. Cameo!

Raiden, come to me! And do what you do. I'm going to give you a die to roll to get yourself some action points. It would really help me if you... If you use area effects, or. Or if you rattle my foe. Okay, okay, okay.

Yeah, those are some of my objectives. Or you can move us to an adjacent area. Those are always nice. Or you can just punch him, that's fine, too. Good, good, good, okay, okay, okay. Ah, that's three action points. Not bad, not bad. I'll send this back.

I don't know if you can get it back, but I'll do it. None to the top. Fine, cool. I'm going to bamf in and go, it wasn't your acting. They were worried about your extracurricular activities. All your tweets, your social media.

Get you in trouble every time. Thought they were deleted. Just delete the app. Delete the app! You fool! And I will turn to Reyd, and I will harry a foe. The foe must spend action points or be rattled.

Oh. How many action points? Two. Oh. Ooh. Oh, man! Or else be rattled. And also, just so the audience knows, we are now moved into custom homebrew territory here for the specifics of this Mortal Kombat 1 show.

Of the Till the Last Gasp system? Yes, yes. Okay. He's going to take it and be rattled. Yes. That helps me. Reign stumbles back. Ah!

So be it. Kitana, we have a shared goal. You either join me, or I break you and make you join my cause. I do more Mortal Kombat. I... Oh, can I do that? So can I still do,

can I still summon a cameo even if I'm rattled? Yes, you can summon a cameo even if I'm rattled? Yes, you can summon a cameo in the defensive, wary, bold, or reckless stances. So you can summon a cameo pretty much whenever. Okay. I whirl my staff, jump into the air to drop it down on Cage, and just then, my body becomes water

and Katana comes flying through. Ooh. Nice. Awesome. Cool. Oh, so I'm already summoned? Yeah, with a flash. Okay. You're here, rocketing towards Johnny Cage. Do you have to roll action points? I think I do, yeah a flash. Okay. Your hair rocketing towards Johnny Cage.

Do I have to roll action points? I think I do, yeah, okay. So. And can I still give her an edge die? You can. You can. Just at the top, yeah. While she rolls. Balls and balls.

That's one, two. One, two, okay, I get, wait. That's it, two. Two, right? Yeah. Okay. And then you need me to... Rattling is good. Rattling is good! And I think that's going to be all that is in your wheelhouse.

I come flying through this rain, fan in hand. This rain, fan in hand. This rain. Rain in rain. And my fan lands right here on Johnny Cage's neck and I'm to harry a foe. I'm going to spin, okay. I look at him and I say,

you know, in this lighting, I can see all the grays. I just push the button. Oh! That's not called for. That's not called for! That's not called for! That doesn't fit right in there. Shake it off. I like you. Shake it off, buddy.

I push the fan into his throat, yank it out, and stand next to Reyn once again. Oh man. Reyn and Ben. Just fine. You're old. How did you deal with that? I just die, man. Really? Yeah, but sometimes they like the silver fox.

Look, age equals wisdom. You're right, you're right. Wisdom equals hurt joints, but it's okay. No. We're in the Verdant Plaza right now. Each combatant can ready an edge die for the first time they draw a drama here. Oh, but we're Verdant Plaza right now. Each combatant can ready an edge die for the first time they draw a drama here. Oh, but we're not drawing drama right now.

Or unless I do, maybe I'll draw a drama. Got custom dramas? I will just do a drama. I'm going to draw a drama card. Draw a drama, draw it from the center deck here. Oh boy, we both have to cover our... Offer your hopes that there is a timeline Oh boy. Deck here. Oh boy, we both have to cover our... Offer your hopes that there is a timeline where you can be allies in battle.

Oh, Reyn. You know, at first when I met you, I didn't really get your whole vibe. It seemed like you were typecasting yourself in this whole water thing, But now I get it. You can be ice, you can be mist, you can be steam, you can be a lot of different things. And when you're parked next to fire, like me.

Oh god. We might make a really good duo. I'm telling you, we could star in some movies together. I've got a sequel coming up to my... to Alien vs. Predator vs. Cage. Maybe it could be called Alien vs. Predator vs. Cage with rain. I'm just throwing it out there.

Consider that. Considered. You will only ever be background in my life. Ooh! I get an edge die for that, and it's your turn. As your cameos, they came in with lightning speed and then are instantly rushed back to the sidelines. Oh, they disappear.

You have to re-summon them each time, as you can still feel that little tingle of being attached to them deep in your soul. Delete those posts. X is the stupid platform name! Okay, Reign. Tell me, Johnny, did you ever do any of your own fights,

or was it always stunt doubles? Come and find me if you dare. And I disappear and shift over to the stone pavilions. Oh, smack. Do I go with him, or does he just go and I got to use my turn to get there? You chase after him.

Oh, I do chase after him. Yes, he's moving. Moving the fight. You have to run. Oh god. Now we're in the stone pavilion. There is no other way. Use a vote once per round to describe how you adapt your moves to the confines of the pavilion,

then ready an edge to go. Oh, that's interesting. Okay, wait. What do I need to do? She's just two of you. So one of my things was move the duel to an adjacent area. I didn't do that, he did that. So I don't get credit for that.

No. Shit. Okay. Well, then I will... Although you can do that again if you just want to keep the chase going. I could, but instead, I'm an actor, not a fighter. I will summon my cameo again.

Perfect. Spending an action point. Cameo, I need you. I mean, sorry. Reydan, I need you. I go up to attack Reynn, but I realize this area is precarious. I might hurt myself. The things that I want to do are really hard,

so I'm going to need my stunt double to come in and do it for me. It feels almost like an audio pulse, like you're standing too close to a speaker in the front of the stage as you feel and emanating just from the front of your chest. Raiden, the god of thunder. I will give you another edge dice.

Ooh! Oh man! Oh, baby. I go to punch Reign and I freeze and I just go, cut, hold, hold, hold, and then I move and Raiden just comes right to my same position. Raiden comes in. I put my sunglasses on him.

Sunglasses on, my chest is perfectly waxed. He's getting a body double. For some reason, my ass is out, and it's glistening in the rain. Butt double as well as stunt double. I will land a hit on a foe. They describe the injury. I'll spend three action points,

and my summoner can change to any stance that they want. Those glistening buns turn and just an epic hip thrust into the solar plexus of Reign. With the clap of Raiden's ass cheeks, so comes the clap of thunder right directly towards you, Reign. How do you take it? That hip check hits me right in the solar plexus.

I slide back. Ugh! The impertinence. And I'm so mad. I can change state, right? Wait. On your turn? Oh wait, oh, was that something in the? Wait. On your turn? Oh, wait, oh, was that something in the?

That was for your summoner. Oh, no, the summoner. Oh, got it, got it, got it, got it. Johnny Cage can. Cage can change state. Great, great, great. Yeah, so I'm just, I'm livid, but I've never been butt-checked by a half-naked god before. I don't know what to do!

And then it's your turn now, right? Okay, now I better know what to do! And then it's your turn now, right? Okay, now I better know what to do. Yeah. Okay. Kitana, prepare yourself. I draw from my inner strength and ready an edge die. Aw. Ooh, nice.

Okay, so you're just prepping. So you're summoning me? Not yet. I wish I could. Holding on. Johnny Cage. Johnny Cage. Shit, I'm not going to change my stance. I'm going to stay in my quick stance.

But I will grab my foe and step gracefully to an adjacent area. I think I'm going to take this to the Twinned Willows. Ooh! Twinned Willows. Fancy footwork. Yeah, I'll trip Reign, and as he falls, I'll grab him and body check him into the next area and just say,

H2O, no, buddy! Reign, you come thudding down. That was horrible. Oh god! Your back is smashed up against one of the willow trees as you are smacked into the twin willow garden. That's my move. It is.

This guy's an asshole. I get up to my feet. I'm pulling broken willow reeds out of my cowl. I don't know what's more embarrassing, that I let you lay hands on me or your stupid puns. I'm going to... Yeah. I'm going to... Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Kitana, let's pay this actor a lesson. And I bring her into the fray. But not residuals. A tornado forms next to Reign. Yes. Just her fans, blades flying in a circle,

and you see the blade suddenly stop as she grabs it in front of her, and Katana forms in front of him, or next to him. With a whoosh entering in from this tornado, you get to now take your action. Here we go. Come on, man! All right. That's cool.

You get a little action. Oh, you need to draw a drama, is one of your objectives, yes? Okay. Compel any one fighter to draw one drama, including yourself. I compel thy one fighter to draw one drama, including yourself. I compel thy Johnny Cage to draw. I compel thy Johnny Cage.

What was my middle name? You're fighting for the wrong side, okay. Reign, you don't get it. You're fighting for the wrong side. Yes, yes! You didn't for the wrong side. Yes! You didn't write the script! Yeah. Yes. This is a cue card.

Yeah. You don't get it. Yeah. Yeah. When I got here today, I knew that we were meant to be brothers. Can I get some of that spray to make me cry? Yeah, yeah, yeah, the stick. Okay, yeah. Uh-huh.

Because when I look at you, I see a younger, confused version of myself. Join me, Reign, and we can ride into the sunset together as brothers. Please. It's the first time I've seen his eyes. His eyes are a little bloodshot, but it's just from the menthol stick. Please. It's the first time I've seen his eyes. His eyes are a little bloodshot,

but it's just from the menthol stick. It's not. That felt really good, guys. That felt really good. I don't like it, but it's oddly compelling. Sindel shouts from beyond, Less talking, you're not friends! Fight!

Your turn. I am out of action points. All right, I got one more. I can only do a drama or I'm going to summon my cameo. All right. Once again, cuckoo! With a crack of thunder, Raiden. Amazing, with one action point.

Can't do much, can you? I will destroy some scenery. Chew the scenery! With the twin willows, I'll say, this one's for number one. Johnny Cage! A lightning bolt will shoot up and strike the top of the willows,

cracking a branch and falling towards the wall. Wow, Raiden, you know, earlier tonight, my agent was tragically killed. If, when we're done, you're looking for work, I could use a new agent. I paid him less than 10%, though, so maybe you could take five? Five.

Five. Six, and we've got a deal. All right. All right. Round two! Oh, round two! Five! Skulls. Not my skulls. Ooh. Roll for action points.

I rolled a 15. Oh, we get to take one die back? Correct, you get to ready an edge die. 15, and I'll roll... And you may change stances if you wish. We can change stances. Correct. Oh baby.

My little nubbin's gone. Here it is, okay. Ohances. Correct. Oh, baby. My little nubbin's gone. Here it is. Oh yeah. 15. Come on! Oh! Oh! Six gets me two more points.

You're slow playing it. You're slow playing it. Rope-a-doping. Oh! Man! Man, oh man. One, two. I don't know if he can afford me, sweetheart.

Not yet. I'm learning the thing. One and the same. Okay. All right. Does that mean Johnny Cage is up first again? Johnny Cage is always up first. Number one on the cult sheet. Yeah.

I have this one for you. Have it. I'll take it. That's what I'm getting to. Oh, good. We all thought of it at once. I'm so enthralled. Okay. Ah! Well, thought of it at once. Show of thrall. Okay, I will...

The Twin Willows is pretty cool. Mm-hmm. What can I do? I'm going to use two action points to step gracefully, moving the duel to an adjacent area. Okay. We're going to go now, we're going to go walk into the Garden Bridge. Okay.

Yeah, I'll just say, Reyn, the lighting here is not great. I don't love the direct sunlight. I need that dappled look. So we're going to take it over to the bridge. It's a very beautiful bridge. They shot scenes from Memoirs of a Geisha here. It's gorgeous.

Johnny knows. He loves it. Yeah. Nice bounce light here. That's my turn. Reign, it's starting to get frustrating. He didn't even throw you there. He's just on a running game right now. All right.

I coat the floor with water. You want to chase? I run and dive into a sky. Get over here! Nod your line! Catch him by the leg, swing him around, and launch him back into the Verdant Plaza. Ooh! Oh my god. Amazing.

I'm riding on top of him, and once we get there, I tell him, whether you want this or not, we are fighting here. No more running. As you jettison Johnny Cage through, they go through these twin willows. In what you don't realize, Johnny Cage, until you land, you have been completely speared with a branch

that has impaled you all the way through your spleen. Oh! Ah! Oh! It hurts. I think you got two of those, it's okay. Good old Johnny Two Spleens. They call me.

No, I had both my spleens taken out to drop weight for a movie. Oh my god. You don't for a movie. Oh my god. You don't really need them. Oh, sorry. I had all unnecessary organs removed. Had a couple necessary ones. That move from the garden bridge,

I think rattles Johnny Cage. Oh, it does? Oh, okay. Really? That tracks. It's what has been in play. To rattles to what? To, I think, anything you choose. Okay. Well, then shit.

What's it doing? Well, then shit. Will she? I don't have... Okay, I'll just go to defensive rattled stance. I back up, not looking great, and also a little scared by having wood sticking through me.

Normally, you've been very used to being soaking wet from the rain from all of these Thunder Gods, but this time, you feel a warm sensation. You almost think you pissed yourself for a second. Again? But you look down, and it is your own blood turning your very expensive jeans

a nice crimson color. No, these are expensive jeans. You know what? This reminds me of that scene in Cage of Tomorrow. Oh my god. Jesus Christ. Tomorrow. Well, I was...

Every name he's in is also named after her for every movie. He's in the contract. He's always in the contract, yeah. He's always self-produced, yeah. He started a little production company. Out of cage productions. Killed in special ice cage.

What? Cage up. Oh jeez. But in that movie, I ended up winning in the end, not because of my will or my strength, but because of my friends. I will bring in Raiden to fight for me again. Beautiful!

Oh man. I will give him another die. Rattle this motherfucker! Oh, okay, okay, six and a one, two. That's all I needed, that's all I needed. I will harry it. Yes, no, I will harry a foe, and the foe must spend action points or be rattled.

And I'll say, listen, whether you win or lose, I've got all of his movies on DVD, and I will sit you down and peel your eyelids open and make you watch, or let you die. You feel rattled by being threatened with the Clockwork Orange approach. So you, oh yeah, it doesn't say White Rattled Stan. So I have to put Director's Cut.

Oh no, the Director's Cut. The agent's cut. Oh no, the director's cut of tomorrow. Okay. Its alternate title was Caged Diarope. Yeah. Reign has never actually felt terror like that before. That's a fate worse than death. And screaming,

you can't do this to me! And I go running and try to take shelter in the twinned willows. Nice, nice. It's just moving all over the place. Yes, it is. Do we get a bonus point for activating all four areas of the map?

Yeah, do we unlock a secret level or steps? Sindel, getting frustrated by the amount of time she has to change position, just goes, avoidance is only temporary. Well, shit, what round is this, two? Two. Two? I'm already done with my objective! Holy shit! Oh no!

Are you really? Yeah, he's been helping me out! Oh, man! Yeah. Got to get to four, got to get to four. All right. Do you have any more action points? I do, I have three, which I will use. He's already rattled.

I'll just compel you to draw a drama. Draw that drama. So I got to draw from here, yeah? Yes. You don't know who you're up against. I don't take damage like a normal man. What you got? It's all the Botox.

Compliment your foe and their mentor on the quality of their training. Whoa. I think. Jean-Claude. Okay. Sanford Meisner. Sanford Meisner. Sanford Meisner!

No! No! Who told Hagu? No! I'm a method actor. As much as I might hate you, I can't help but admit I'm very jealous of your hair. Where did you learn to style it like that?

That must have come from your master, David Hasselhoff. Yeah! You're right. The Hoff was a big inspiration to me, and he gave me the number of the guy who put in the hair implants. All right. Johnny Cage. I mean, that's it for me.

It says I can spend, I'm going to Ready and End Shite. That's it for my turn. Okay. Beautiful. Do you have any more action points? All right, round three. Round three! Oh, sweet mercy. Oh, please roll. You need this one.

So we can change state. You can change your stances. Oops. Oh, we can change our stances, so I don't have to be rattled anymore. Correct. That's great. I'm going to go to... Oh shit.

I guess I got to go to quick. And I'll spend another one of these. No, I won't. I'm not going to. I'm not going to. I'm going to go into the wary stance. Oh man. I'm not going to spend any of my edge dice. Okay. I'm good. Come on!

Okay, that's better. All right, all right, okay. And one edge. All right, well. Really? Dude, it's unreal. Oh my god. Four extra fucking. It's cool, it's fine.

It's fine. Oh my goodness. Oh shoot, what did I have, 14? Okay. I rolled a 10 on the die. Okay. I rolled a 14, though it didn't seem to help me that much. You still have the advantage.

You go first, Reign. Yes. Round three. Let's get wet. Way ahead of you. Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm. Okay. I come running in at Johnny Cage.

I prepare an overhand right, and just as I'm about to reach him, I use my water powers to glide out from under him and make the floor under him slick so that we both end up sliding into a new territory. Oh! The Garden Bridge. Nice. The Garden Bridge.

She's going all over this place. Slip all the way. Full water slide moment. Yeah. Yeah. She's saying Gran Turismo. Sindel's like, wrong game! From the spirit realm,

Katana's just fanning them a little bit further, so they move all the way. There we go, just projecting, helping them move a little bit further, so they move all the way. There we go, just projecting, helping them move a little bit more. You feel her soul energy just sliding on her feet. Okay, I will spend all three of my action points to rattle my foe into a defensive stance,

and I'll rattle you by saying, do you think you could talk to Katana for me? Oh my god. I just feel like we had a connection and if you could just put in a good word for me, I think she respects you for some weird reason. Maybe because you're both from the Outrealms or whatever. I don't know, just whatever it is,

like put in a good word for me. Or I'll kill you. I am so put off by your lack of modesty. Dude, what is wrong with you? That is never happening! I use my two action points to draw a drama and rattle Johnny Cage. Ooh, draw from the center.

At this point, the camera sweeps around and petals from the cherry blossom tree fall and drift slightly in the wind behind you all on this very beautiful, romantic scene we have going on. Accuse your foe of throwing away the potential they once had. Oh boy. I'm so excited for this.

This is a good card. This is perfect for her, Johnny. Great card. Great card. Ooh. Earlier, you showed a little bit of your soul to me, and it moved me in a powerful way. You could do that on the silver screen.

You had the chance, but instead you sold out for money. And now you're an action star that no one will remember and no one will ever say changed their lives. You are nothing but a glorified prop. I had a chance to do Leer once. Community theater, not a lot of money. My agent, may he rest in peace. I told him I really wanted to do it.

It was perfect for me. Star turn. But he told me I just booked a part in the Cage Runner. A low budget knockoff of the Maze Runner. It wasn't a lot of pay, just five grand. But I was attracted to the money and I never got to do another stage play again. I've regretted that day ever since. You're saying I still have it?

I could still get on the stage? I could still change people's lives. My friend, if only are two of the worst words you can ever have to utter, and that is all you have left. From out of nowhere, you all are so caught up in this moment, you do not notice,

and suddenly, directly in between the two of you, a giant, purple, almost feels like a flash bomb, massive strike of purple energy, flame explodes, sends you all backwards from each other, and a Nassindel levitating above you all. I said, no more talking!

And she screams and goes into her banshee shout, and you each lose one action point. Oh! I don't have any. Do I lose one on the next round or no? No, no. Did you have any? Zero. Oh, well then, there you go.

But it still hurts like crazy! I was already at my lowest moment. Like the loud cheating acts from Jurassic Cage. Jurassic Cage. Nobody came out of that with you. Fine. It is time to finish this. Final round.

Yeah! Fight! All right. Oh man. Do not disappoint me, gentlemen. Bad roll, bad roll. So let's see. Spend them. I got you. Ooh.

Bloop bloop. That's all you need, right? That's all I need. Okay. Hmm. Spend them all. Yep. All right. Okay. So one, two, three.

And then one, two. We're on the garden bridge. Currently on the bridge. This is fourth. All right, is rain up top? I got five. Well, I got 10, yep, I got seven. Rain. Wait, is this fourth round?

Fourth round. Fourth round. Here we go. Are you sure you don't want to spend all those? Actually, got so much. Reign. Wait, is this fourth round? Fourth round. Fourth round. Here we go. Are you sure you don't want to spend all those? Actually, no. Yeah. Come on, Reign. Oh, nice. What are you waiting for? Nice, okay. There is a purple energy

that is starting to emanate off of Sundown. You see what I need, yeah? Yep. It's her rage. We can do this, Kitana. We can finish this here and now. Kitana, a flash of lightning comes down from the skies, and Kitana appears next to Reign.

Fans in the skies, a crash of lightning strikes her blades. So I've been summoned. And then she rolls. Oh, here we go. Oh, thank you. Take it. Oh snap, oh snapkins. Five and a four. Ooh, good rolls. Right, right.

Three. Two. Three total. Three. Oh, good roll. Three. Two. Three total. Three. Okay, and she, I would like to spend, oh, that's all you need? Okay, I spend one action point to compel any one fighter to draw one drama.

Hey, has-been! I think she's talking to you, Reign. Accuse your foe of being a lackey to the feeble warriors they serve. Well, I know so much about Reign and his lord. Who wears the pants over here, Reign? You or your cameo? Seems like she's doing more damage than you. You've got nothing.

Face me yourself. That's all I got. I'm a wizard. What do you want from me? It is your turn, Johnny Cage. It is my turn. And on Johnny Cage's turn, I'm going to spend four action points, and I am going to end this duel.

Oh! Wait for it. I, oh, wait for it. Johnny Cage. Finish him! Yeah! I'm going to first subdue Reign by doing a number of complicated flip moves

and awesome gymnastic moves that, again, aren't me doing them, but when I land, it's me. I do a flashy shadow kick, and when he's stunned, I will whip out another one of my headshots to Reign. I will whip out another one of my headshots to Reign. I will whip out another one of my headshots to Reign. I will whip out another one of my headshots to Reign. What should I say to Reign?

Thanks for all of you. Can you still put in a good word for Katana? Yeah. Keep smiling. Johnny Cage. And I will use my headshot to swipe across his throat, just drawing a blood, a streak of blood down his neck,

ending him, and I'll pose dramatically to Sindel and take a bow. That's how you do it. She nods. He just got caged. Oh god! Reyn, you're not entirely sure what happened. Everything seems fine. You could feel the intense, sharp pain

as he slid across your throat and the little bit of the blood that starts to pour. Merely a flesh wound, just a scratch. You take one step further to try and go after Johnny Cage as he bows, trying to utilize the moment of distraction. But as your body moves forward, your head does not. As your head rolls backwards, decapitated.

Fatality! Ah! Money shot. Congratulations, Mr. Cage. Was there ever a question? Immensely. I'm honestly quite surprised. Which is honestly why I can't say I'm quite excited to fight you one-on-one.

Wait, wait, wait. I did your little trials. I entertained your guests. I killed all these guys. It's over, right? Wait, it's over. I'm the champion. I won. Where's my prize? You didn't think that I would hold a tournament

and not get my hands dirty myself. Now, did you? I honestly didn't think about your, you at all. Silly little boy. I don't know if you've heard, but it may be a Barbie summer, but it is a Sindel century! And to that I say, sir, you are not enough.

I love it here. You see the threads of the summons snap, your souls back in your own bodies as you are back in corporeal form. Sindel, almost it looks like she's reversing time, pulls Reign back from his demise. Oh, your head's back. Keep smiling. Christopher Lambert, I have so many questions. I do like this stuff.

I wish to show you all something. Sindel begins to levitate, and this purple energy that has been forming this aura around her flashes outward into a massive AoE, consuming all of you. You see a bright flash of purple light. You are no longer in the garden. As she teleports all of you to,

where's the map, where's the map? Oh boy, map reveal. A laboratory. Oh. Whoa. Shang Tsung's lab? Shang Tsung's laboratory. Amongst it,

you see vials, bottles, experimentations, as well as gurneys, beds, still coated with the remains of whatever humans they've been experimenting on. In the center of this laboratory, you also see an Asian man, older, maybe in his mid-50s, dark hair pulled back into a tight ponytail, a pointed nose,

a nice open robe, showing just his excellent physique, adorned with brown, tan, black, and gold. And he is trapped inside a capsule. He is screaming, but you can't hear him as he is encased in glass. But what you can see is electrical nodes that appear to be ripping his soul from his body,

and then it reenters. And then it pulses again as his soul is ripped and then reentered, as he is in this constant state of flux, as his soul is neither intact, neither his, but with the constant reminder of what he is missing over and over and over again.

You see, Shang Tsung betrayed me. We were supposed to be partners until he sucked the soul out of my body. It was a horrible experience. So horrible, in fact, I thought. What if I could replicate this? Make it occur again and again and again.

For eternity. This was his laboratory, after all. Hmm. It's poetic, really. This was his laboratory, after all. Hmm. It's poetic, really. Being subjected to the fate that he bestowed upon so many of us. So.

Who would like to come after me first? When you see Sindel levitate above the laboratory, she sends once again a massive shockwave out. After all, it is my party and I can fight if I want to. All right. Sorry. That was cool. That was cool. That was really cool. I like that one.

We are going into this final round. Final round. Of our fight tonight. How do we do this? 4v1. We are going 4v1 once again. Do we have objectives? Yes, we are.

If you two would like to hand me your objectives that you had. Okay. Beep. Beepity-boppity. Beep. We'll leave these in the middle. Oh yeah, we have special moves. I'm going to mix these up at random

and hand them out to you. These are your new objectives. You do have special moves. Here, I will let you all pick. So it still feels like you have at least a little bit of urgency. Oh, thank you. I'll do this one.

Oh, hell! What?! Uh-oh. So many dice! This is not going well. We're in the same, jeez. Whoa. Oh boy, okay. Wait, what?

Hell, would you even? Okay. What? These are easy, guys. Okay. No way. Let me pull up my 4v1 rules. Yes, they are, just in case. All right, everybody, let's all roll for initiative.

Let's go. Holy moly. 16? Okay, that's all roll for initiative. Let's go. Holy moly. 16? Okay, that's great. Come on. So hang on. Let me do the math here. So we go back to five edge die. And then I'm going to... Yucky.

I'm going to spend another one. All right. Okay. That's better. I got five action points. Use three drones. I can pull your foot a drone. I'm going to snag two edge dice. We all start with five again, right? Yes. Okay, good.

All right, who rolled what? I got a 16. I got a 15. 11, good. All right, who rolled what? I got a 16. I got a 15. 11. 19. Ooh! Okay, so that was Raiden, Johnny Cage, Katana and Reign, if I'm correct.

Yeah, I think that's right. But just one of us needs to complete their objectives, right? Yes. Correct. And their special moves. As usual, it comes initially late in game, which further some ocean. Ba-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-ba-da.

Oh, wait. Counteract the monster with a terminal initiative advantage. We're all an internal initiative advantage. Blah, blah, blah. We're all learning. Yeah, okay. As we go. Yeah, we're all... All right. Katana. Today we fight together.

Katana, let's bury the hatchet and be allies this day. Well, I'll talk about the ally part later, but I guess we can work together for now. Co-stars. One, two. Acquaintances at best. Co-stars. And then there we go. Okay, cool.

All right. Sindel is up first. Oh! Oh! Dang! She's cooking the books. All right, all right, all right. As she is levitating above all of you in this just complete mess of a laboratory,

she immediately looks to you, Johnny Cage. Johnny Cage. I have been waiting for this moment as you have been so annoying and she whips her hair and grapples you with her long, almost sentient mane. You can feel it tightening like a cobra around your neck as she lifts you and with a head whip, throws you across the laboratory

and smashes you into a table with glass shattering all behind you, injuring you. That was me injuring you. Am I in the same room? You are in the same room. I smash you on the table, I land a hit on my foe, but you describe the injury. Oh, you threw me onto a table.

Correct. Let's say that, strangely, even though the table was filled with glass beakers Let's say that, strangely, even though the table was filled with glass beakers and sharp metal instruments and pointy electrical objects, I missed all of them. Instead, I fell on my keys. It goes right up into my abdomen.

Oh, okay. I have to pull them out. Oh, jeez. Blood trickling from my leg. That's the worst. I know that my keys, I know that they say Geo Prism on them, but that's to dissuade people.

I really drive a Bentley. It's a Bentley, it's just I had to get a replacement key. Raiden, you are up. A laboratory, my favorite terrain. And I will start to crackle with lightning. Says the lightning god. I'll float up off the ground, and I will spend two action points to land a hit on my foe,

but I will use the electrical coils that are situated all around the room to amplify like a Tesla coil this lightning as it arcs around and as it hits you, it strikes just at your hair to see what will happen to that amazing Elvira Dew. You just hear a little, ooh, from Sindel.

It's surprising how unthreatening as it was, as sure enough, just like a poodle on a high static day, poof, you see that mingo. This pisses her off even more. Johnny Cage. Johnny Cage is up. With Katana on deck. Seeing the electrical mishaps

that Raiden has created in the room, there's one particular piece of electrical equipment that is sizzling and jittering, and with a couple of turns of the knobs, I rearrange it so that it's sending out flashes of light on a regular pulse, and it makes us all look like we're moving at a stutter, like a strobe effect, almost like we're all in a movie.

Yeah. And I will stop motion picture. And I will use the laboratory floor action and describe, I just described this artifact and how it's damaged. And so I get to ready an edge die and that will be my move. Okay, fantastic.

Next. Katana. Reign, you are on deck. Let's see. I would like to spend three action points. One, two, three. To rattle your foe into a defensive stance. Katana looks up at her mother, floating in the air.

Whoa! Take two. Katana looks up at her mother floating in the air. Whoa! Take two. Three take. She looks up at her mother floating in the air. Mother! Yes? You were a better mother when you were brainwashed and rattles her into a defensive stance.

It. I'm going to take it. Yeah, I'm going to allow it. and rattles her into a defensive stance. Can you be rattled? I'm going to take it. Yeah, I'm going to allow it. She's powerful. And then, with that. Because it's family. With her hair all frazzled, she just says, what do you know, you naive little brat?

Rayne, you're on deck. I'm going to use one action point to draw a drama. So am I drawing from this pile now? Yeah, I think so. For the rest of the game. But I have to substitute for that, and instead I ask Sindel. This already isn't going well for you, Sindel.

What do you hope to achieve here? What's your purpose? My entire existence hasn't gone well. I'm afraid you're speaking to a pro. She cackles. As she cackles. Who's up next? Top of the round, that's me! Oh my god!

Oh wait, oh yeah. Same round, same round, but my turn, sorry. Being incredibly frustrated, especially at her daughter, I'm going to spend two action points to compel Kentana to draw a drama. Ooh, okay. Ah, let's see. spend two action points to compel Kitana to draw a drama. Ooh, okay. Let's see. Drama! I hate a red heart.

You can tell. Tell your foe why you cannot risk sparing her life. Okay. Kitana looks up at her mother and says, I've been wanting to do this for a long time, Mother. I'm sick of these meetings that you call upon me to with no warning whatsoever. What was it having?

It's so weird. Jesus Christ. No consideration of my calendar. I know, hello. I had this week blocked out. Moms, am I right? And she looks at the rest of them and says, besides, for once in my life,

I think I've made some friends. She looks at all of them and, not all of them, but most of them. Therefore, you must die. You think friendship and camaraderie can save you? Come here, darling. Katana just floats up to her mother without any control.

Oh wow. Raiden. Me. Johnny Cage on deck. I will also land another hit on my foe using two action points. No, fuck that. I'm going to use three action points

to rattle my foe into the reckless stance. Did you hear that? Your daughter has friends. Do you have any friends that you haven't turned into punch bowls of blood? I don't see any. What are all those hamsters doing up in those cages? They look like they've seen some shit. You know what they have? Us for friends. Phenomenal. Johnny Cage.

Johnny Cage is going to compel your foe to draw one drama. And it says how I have to react to it, but I will yell up to Sindel, Sindel! Just let us go! You know this isn't going to end well for you. Quit playing your crazy games and let us go back to our plush Hollywood estates.

I blame my foes for making everything worse. Okay. You asked why I am doing this. You ask if I have friends. No, you know why. Because everyone who's ever been in my life has betrayed me. Trust is not a resource that I can count on.

You made me like this! I'm supposed to react with surprising compassion. Are you? So I will gently weep. A little tear will trickle down my face and I'll say, that was an incredible performance. Can I use that for auditions or dramatic stuff or some of the theatrical stuff

that Reign was telling me about? Save your tears for the camera. There's cameras? That's the end of my turn. Katana, with rain on deck. I would like, okay, Katana starts flicking her fans together to sharpen the blades. Sheen, sheen, sheen.

She's readying herself and she readies an edge die for two action points. And then she readies an edge die for two action points. Then she readies. Yeah, let's put one here. Then that is the end of my turn. Okay, rain. You're confused, Sindel. You don't need to trust, only obey.

Draw a drama card. Ooh! Drama dispelled. So much drama. Warn your foe that their death shall accomplish nothing. You've already died once today, Reign. What do you think will happen when I claim your soul permanently?

Yeah, that is me. It's me on deck. Hanging on every word. Oh. You know what? Just because it's on theme, and because I was just addressing Reign, I'm going to draw one drama again and rattle my foe, being,

Are you already rattled? No. He's not. No, I am not. I will rattle you. And then I boast about my own excellence. You see, I am entering my villain era! And then I actually gain an action point with that card. Quietly, you hear Kitana in the back,

like, honestly, slay. Yeah. That was my turn. Raiden. With one action point left, I will destroy some scenery. Ooh. And I will pick up a beaker marked urine. Ugh!

And I will throw it at the window. She just darts out of the way, dashing to the side, leaving a purple echo of herself She just darts out of the way, dashing to the side, leaving a purple echo of herself that you do see the bottle of urine just pass by, still shaking her a little bit.

She just looks at you and goes, the fuck? No, I just saw it. I don't understand why that's in a place like this. Oh, trash people. Johnny Cage. I will burn my last action point to draw a drama. Describe the fatality you intend to perform if you win.

Okay, when I win, Sindel, I'm going to do to you what you did to your ex-husband, Shao Kahn. I'm going to grow plants. He did so many things. No, no, what you did to him, we're going to grow plants. You know what? No, it was really gross. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I mean, it was a fantasy. It was too gross.

It was super gross. I grew those from scratch through his body. I'm going to use my victory against you as the first thing on my new reel, so that all the casting directors in LA are going to see me defeat you every time that I submit myself for a role, which is a lot.

So they're going to see you beating on a woman. Oh. Shit. Extracurricular activities. Extracurricular. Delete those tweets. Stop streaming online. What are you doing? I've got to delete those tweets.

Katana with rain on deck. Help me help you. How are we on action points, everybody? You two are out? I'm out, I'm out. I have two left. All right. With my last two, I would like to do one of those things. Describe an artifact and how it is damaged in the fray.

The first time you do this, ready an edge die. So this has been that and then another edge die here. Describe an artifact and how it's damaged in the fray. Okay, the laboratory floor. The laboratory floor is riddled with shattered glass and beaker, I mean, those are made out of glass, metal. Everything that you can see within eye's distance is just absolutely obliterated.

It is damaged in the fray. And Kitana looks over to one empty tube that had liquid filled in it, but now there's a giant hole that was broken into it, and below you see liquid spilled everywhere, a bright green liquid. Laying there on the floor is a curled up cat, a dead cat.

Katana notices it and looks up at Sindel and goes, You said Fluffy ran away! Oh, scandal. My first experiment. Shit just got personal. Katana wipes a tear away with her fans and she says, you will die for this. That is the end of my movie. Reign. I'm going to die for this. That is the end of my movie.

Reign. Reign takes in the laboratory floor, and I notice that amongst the debris, there are the bodies of strange, twisted creatures with bones coming out of places that they shouldn't. They look warped and twisted. What have you been doing? Draw a drama card. Mm-hmm.

Fluffy. Lament on the sad circumstances that made you enemies. You, with so many powers, near the gods, Reynn, you must feel it. This new age that we are in, time has changed, and I must capitalize on it while I can.

There may be other dimensions, other multiverses, other versions of me that do not have this opportunity. I'm sorry, but I must embrace the time that I have. Is that the end of your turn? All right. I am going to... time that I have. Is that the end of your turn? Mm-hmm. All right.

I am going to land a hit on a foe. Who's out of action points? Me. Me. Me. Everyone's out? All right. Next round. Oh, out of action points? Out of action points.

Oh, I've got one to roll. I am not out of action points. Oh, no. Dang! I have hit you, Johnny Cage, correct? I mean, if you could call it that. I'm going to take this moment, spend two action points, because I'm going to capitalize on having your attention.

I'm going to land a hit on you, Reign. I dash towards you with lightning speed. Once again, all you see is this flash of purple and echo coming towards you. It almost feels as if a specter, a ghost, is about to pass through your body, but you are shunted and hit with just the full force as I headbutt into you, ramming you backwards.

You describe the injury. I see a blur of motion and bring my staff up and I swing and hit nothing as you pass that space faster than thought and strike my body and I can feel my soul shudder and for a moment leave my body before it comes back and it leaves me on a knee trying to figure out what the hell you just did to me.

See, Sindel just lick her lips. Mm. Tasty. Then she's going to take your staff and grab it out of your hand, and then whip it around, using your body, and counterweight against you, and smash you once again into a wall,

a shelf just filled with artifacts and beakers, destroying scenery and taking us into a new area. All right! As I throw you, let's see, I'm going to throw you through a shelf that knocks over and flings us into the science lab. Whoa. Okay, that was me using last of my action points.

Round two! Round two! Fight! Hang on, let me make sure I'm tracking all my shit here. Great, great. We roll, yeah? We roll. Everyone gets to refresh and edge die.

I have one action point left. Oh, you had one action point? We'll finish it before we move on. I pick myself up out of the science lab. She's stronger than I thought, and I brace and try to pull as much energy to me as I can, and ready an edge dice. Nice, nice.

All right. All right. It's now round two. Round two, again. Okay. I'm going to switch stances here. Okay, okay. Oh yeah, we can switch stances.

You may switch stances. I think I might switch. Are you kidding me right now? Let me, hang on. One, two. I have some drama. Let me make on. Let's see. I have some drama, drama. Let me make sure here. Changes stances, changes stances.

Changes stances. Stance changes. Lots of cards to read here on Mortal Kombat 1. Okay. Let's see. Yes, I'm going to get that. Let's get a few more going here. That's good, That's good. Not changing it. That's good.

Don't fix what ain't broken, break. Boop. You know what? All right. I rolled a 14. Oh jeez. Oh, what'd I roll? Okay, 14, anyone higher than that? 14. 14.

What? Ooh. Rollies? Rollies! What'd you roll? Six. Let's do rollies between the guys. So we just roll again. That's the rule of rollies. Oh, you guys got 14?

13. One. 19. Ooh. So it will be Raiden, Reign, Johnny Cage, and Kitana, but once again, Sindel goes first. Johnny Cage and Sindel. Wait, he rolled a, oh, no, that's all right. He's on the rollies.

I'll teach you guys roll these after we're done. It's almost as complicated as till the last cast. One sheet. Okay. I am once again going to jettison myself after just taking Reign, bashing him through into this next room. I'm going to turn around in rage at everybody and

I don't want to scream to hurt anybody. I'm going to do a banshee yell. Spending three points, all of you lose one action point. Oh! Bans. I needed that. Harsh, bro. Harsh. Raiden, you are up with rain on deck.

I would like to try something. Okay. I'm going to spend four action points. Ooh. Two of which I would like to do the strange science lab feature where I describe how you smash something delicate or dangerous and all other duelists

must immediately change their stance or lose two action points. So can I use four total and do that as well? Yeah, say that again one more time. So I'm going to spend four action points to complete one of my objectives and two of them will go towards this lab feature. Discretion.

Because it's just destroying scenery. Oh, okay. Change their stance or lose two action points. Damn. Okay. Yes, I will change my stance. I'm going to look up at the wall of science lab hamsters that I mentioned before, their eyes bugging out dark circles, the mirrors of shit that no one should ever see.

And I'll reach up and I'll shove that wall over and it will fall into one of the green, enormous vials glowing behind it. And as it shatters, the body of what looks like Goro spills out on the floor. But as the forearms roll over on its back, you see the face of Johnny Cage on Goro's body. What does it mean?

What does it mean? What does it mean? Sindel quickly braces, trying to shield herself as this green ichor comes flowing out. You also hear as the soul is also screaming from the vial of whatever creature was trapped in there. Wait, do we all change stance? What the hell was that?

You don't have to, but if you do, you have to spend two action points. If you do, you have to spend? No, if you don't change, you have to spend two action points. I'm going to change my stance then. Yee-hee-hee-hee. Okay. And there are sex-crazed science lab hamsters now on the loose in the green cove.

Reign, Johnny Cage is on deck. I am going to... So I've been in a defensive... I've been defensive because I'm still in shock at how powerful Sindel is, but I'm rallying. I'm going to spend two action points to change to the quick state or the ready stance. I think that's all I can do in this run, right?

I believe so. Yeah. Johnny Cane. Similarly, I'm going to go over to the Goro on the floor. Similarly, I'm going to go over to the Goro on the floor. I'm going to study his face and look up at you with horror in my eyes and say to you, Sindel, how could you do this?

You took my likeness without my permission. We don't have paperwork to cover this. I didn't get any sort of license fee or- I've got proof. I've got proof. This is intellectual property theft. If I had an agent, he would be getting a call. In fact, I'm going to text my manager right now, and I'm so angry that I'm going to change my stance

from wary to bold. You're going to pay for that. I thought we had an agreement, Johnny King. This is why we have to hold firm on AI. This is why we strike. All right, next up. Kitana. Kitana is taking in everything that she's seeing.

She is horrified that there's apparently two Johnny Cages, and she doesn't do anything. I would like to spend two to ready an edge die. Okay. Horrified or excited? Okay, there you go. Yes. All right. Back to me, I'm going to spend two action points

to land a blow on a foe. As they describe their injury, I see my daughter going into a defensive stance, getting ready to attack as she's starting to prep herself. And I immediately want to put an end to that. So I summon, you can see just coming out from seemingly nowhere, a giant spear as I spin it and ram it through you.

And I take my hair and whip it around you and just drag you closer onto the spear before releasing you. Learn from mommy, sweetheart. And that is my turn. Nothing like a mother's love as she stumbles back. Raiden, with rain on deck. Is it me?

It's you. I will spend my last three action points to rattle my foe into a reckless stance, and I will go over to the Koro body with the Johnny Cage face. It's so beautiful, Johnny Cage, but with four arms. Like the Goro face.

And to some things, this immortal body doesn't get to do it. Raiden, what? Sindel's response is mine, which is just, ah! And she is actually rattled. I will take it. Objective achieved.

Oh no! Oh my god! Oh wow. And I'm out of action points. That would rattle me. I think Rain is also rattled, but he rattle me. I think Reign is also rattled, but he is on deck. I'm so disturbed by what I just saw, I unconsciously take a step back, slip in the Goro slime,

and running into everybody, because my staff is in my hand, I, and unwittingly, the rest of this crew, I pull everyone into zone four, the archives. Ooh! We're on the move. Okay. Oof. The archives, there is no special thing.

Oh, there is. I do it. Yes. Okay. Who's closest to getting their objectives? Oh, it looks like you're doing really well. What's the last one you need to do? I've got one left, a move.

A move? Okay. Oh, perfect. What round are we in? Second round. Oh, still? Still in second round. Okay. Okay, Reign, that was your action, correct?

Yes. At this point, I think we need to help Reign as much as possible. All right. Yeah, he's close. Mine are possible. Oh, why does he get the easy ones? The easy ones! Look at ours, we're struggling over here.

Yeah, don't forget, you have your special actions where you can throw support. If you want to start helping one person get closer and closer. Johnny Cage. Johnny Cage. With Katana on deck. There's not much I can do to help you, so instead, I will...

Feels like we're doing a lot of talking and not a lot of fighting here. I will, as we left the last room, I gathered up a bunch of the liquid that had spilled on the floor and I'm covering my body with it. And because I've seen Raiden and Reign do all these amazing water moves all night.

I want to try one, too. So I will land a hit on my foe and they describe the injury. I'm going to run up and just shake my body, shake all the wet off of it. That's a goop. And that's it. Yeah.

A little shake shower? Wow, okay. I can do it too. Sure. You shake the skoo off, but unbeknownst to you, it's actually acid. Oh! Boiling acid!

Boiling too! Sure! I wouldn't hurt you, I don't know, but it doesn't matter, it's Mortal Kombat! Why do I like it? Why do I like it? He's built up a tolerance from all the tanning boots. I try to do what they did and form it into a ball

and shoot it out, but I don't have any magic, so it just splatters. It's okay, it's just that it's all dead. It splatters across Sindel's face and you see in her perfect complexion just these little pot marks that start to form as it is burned and you can start to see the inner workings of her facial musculature

as her skin starts to sear away, even just a little at the corner of her mouth, kind of making it look like a permanent smirk. She can't be injured, everyone. Gives you a wink. Katana. Okay. We are in the archives right now?

Correct. I don't know how you move the dual to an adjacent location by smashing through a wall, opening a trapdoor, if I need to, I can pick a foe, rattle them and... Okay, yeah, let's... Yeah, fuck it. I spend two to do that.

One, two. That gives me one here. And let's see. I grab my fans, or I close my fans, throw one in the air, turn around and do a spinning back kick at the fan as it falls down, sending it flying into your throat,

pushing you through a wall and into, I guess, into the autopsy room. Just hear a screech, guttural screech filled with blood as it forces Sindel into the next room. Then, let's see, and it rattles you, or you have to draw one drama. Hmm. Hmm.

Mm, damn, I will be rattled. I'm going to go into a defensive rattled space. Nice. Dance. Nice. Dance. Nice. Good round, good round. Ooh, wait. Damn, that actually messes me up.

Oh! You knew it? That messes my shit up. Damn, okay. In the autopsy room, Katana walks in and she sees these dead bodies laying everywhere and she sees one that she recognizes and it's her boyfriend, Liu Qing. She looks at Sindel and goes, You told me he ran away!

This happens to you a lot. My second experiment. An escalation, if you will. She was more upset about Fluffy. Yeah. All right. You can never finish her. Oh, snap.

I will spend two to draw a drama and rattle a foe. How dare you. Oh, damn. Okay. I accuse my foe of dishonoring the tournament Okay. I accuse my foe of dishonoring the tournament and themselves. So as I'm smashed into the next room,

everyone's screaming at me. I turn my focus to you, Raiden. Look at you. Just holding Goro's plate on my face. Gross. The god of thunder, protector of Earthrealm, and here you are, subjected to be just a lowly fanboy

of some washed up action hero. Don't kink shame. Everybody's got what they love. What have you become? Oh god. Yuck my yum. This part of the one shot, this is canon. We get this one, all right?

We get this one. Okay, that was my turn. Who else has any other action points? I still have two. One point. Oh, and you are rattled. I have rattled you for doing that, for kink-shaming you. Thank you. Rattled for kink-shaming.

Who said? We got one, one, two. Offensive or protected, it's a? It didn't say except for one. Who's up next? Is it Reign? After me, it was Raiden. Are you out of points? I'm out. Okay, so then it would be Reign.

Okay. With Johnny Cage on deck. I can't handle this. I start grabbing every random body part I can find and throwing it at Raiden, just like, get that foot out of your mouth! Stop it! Stop it! I grab a pile of intestines,

I wrap them around his neck, and I'm going to pull him up. I'm like, let it go, Raiden! Let it go! That's my round. Fantastic. Johnny Cage. Destroy scenery. I'm going to destroy scenery

with my remaining action point as well. I will announce proudly to the room, everybody, I just got a text from my manager. Apparently they're doing a sequel to Zero Dark Thirty called Zero Dark Thirty-One, and Joel Edgerton is not coming back. They're auditioning for the part. So I take a few moments and I set up a camera

and a ring light and a little green screen behind me. And I'm like, just give me a second, I got to do this. And I do some action moves. They want to see that I'm a real action star. I do a flying jump kick and I hit one of the autopsy tables, and it smashes, and the body just goes flinging across the floor, and I'm like, I guess I'll do another take later when we're done,

but that's all. Destroy scenery. No auditions. No auditions. Production value, that's nice. And Katana. Travels with a Groot screen. Oh god.

Katana is taking in everything that she sees and she is... Oh god, she's very confused, but she is laying there holding onto Liu Kang's body, just heartbroken, and looks over at Raiden, making out with dead-ass Goro. Getting choked by an intestine. Getting choked by an intestine. I look at him and I say,

You know what? Love who you love, even if they're dead. I hug Liu Kang, ready an edge die for two of my last two actions. Nice. Oh god. Nice. That brings Oh god. Nice. That brings us into round three. Round three, my goodness.

That was just round two, right? Yep, let's do this. Round three, here we go. I'm going to ready. Here we go. Let's see, I'm going to go back. Not bad, not bad. Not bad at all.

I haven't had a good roll all day. Please, thank you. Ooh! That saves up. Bad roll from Sindel, you guys. Wow, that surprised me. Oh, that's weird. I might as well roll.

Weak! All right. Weak! Weak. All right. This is round three. Round three. Round three of the final fight. What do you need to do still for your last one? To get my third, I just need to move the duel to an adjacent area one more time.

How many of these action points do you have? It looks like I had six, so I got two. Oh, you know what? I can give area one more time. How many of these action points do you have? It looks like I had a six, so I got two. Oh, you know what? I can give you one more duel dice. Oh, shoot. I'm going to use the Noble Gambit. Yeah, special action. Two.

Okay. Thanks, Johnny. What's our initiative looking like? Getting one above a 15. Oh! 14. I had a 15. Do it. Okay, so Johnny Cage.

Six. Raiden. Jesus, I rolled a nine? Okay, so it'll be Sindel, Katana, and then what are you at, Reign? A six. Okay. So kicking off this round is Johnny Cage.

Sindel is in the middle of this one. Okay. Are you still flying, Sindel? What happened? I got tossed into the next room. Into the autopsy room. And had acid dog-shaked into my face. So no, I would say I am on the ground at this point because I smeared the ass at all.

I want to have a true mortal combat attack. So I'm going to spend a couple action points to land a hit on my foe. Okay. And I'm going to do an incredible mortal combat type attack. Now, what you all see is just me moving my hands wildly and then going, That's it.

That's it. But in post, when they're done, they're going to make it look, how are they going to make it look? It says, you describe your injury. Or is this just movie maker? The effects wizards are going to do amazing stuff to it. Gotcha.

There was just one Mortal Kombat where they gave Johnny Cage weird chi energy, like energy blasts. And since, as I was telling Reign, the timelines, the multiverses, they all seem to be blurring. So Johnny Cage in this realm can't, but for a second, just as like you've been flashing in almost different dimensions with your stunt double,

old Johnny Cage, different Johnny Cage, apparates for a brief second, this flash, as Sindel is hit with this weird bluish chi wave that she was not anticipating, and it sends her flying back, ribs crushed into her lungs, shrapnel from her bones spiking her lungs, collapsing. And then I'll just, as a cool one-liner, I'll just say, Throw that on your shrimp, Barbie.

Huh? On your shrimp, Barbie? Wait, this is an Australian? Australian Jenny Gage? Are you trying to do that Wolverine moment? Is that what that is? Yeah, I'm trying to do a cool Australian one-liner. It's funny already, but Travis' laugh

makes it way more funny, too! Nice. There you go. Raiden. With Sindel on deck. Inspired by that attack, I will spend two action points to land a hit on my foe. They describe the injury, but I,

the light still flashing from Johnny Cage's earlier thing, the stop motion, I turn my hair wet, and it moves slowly as you hear the theme song from CW's Smallville. Somebody save me! And I reach down, hands crackling with blue energy as I look into the eyes of my love, Johnny Cage Goro, and I external defibrillator.

Oh, God! Once, twice, on the third time, Goro stands up and runs across the room and punches you dead in the face. What the hell? Goro lives! You described the injury.

Amazing. I am facing towards Johnny Cage, so my back is completely turned towards Raiden and Goro, as I have no idea what's going on. And I'm essentially sucker punched from behind with his giant body. It sends basically a classic Mortal Kombat uppercut as it sends Sindel flying and landing flat on her ass. That's what love does. You all also notice that as these lightning bursts from Raiden are emanating,

it sends off these shocks of ball lightning that have started bouncing across the room, and some of them have hit the giant canister that Shang Tsung is in. And you see little hairline cracks start to form. Oh! Shang Tsung, did I say that wrong? Shang Tsung.

I went backwards, from Zyn. Okay, Sindel being extremely pissed off at this. Okay. I don't know, you guys. I just don't know. I'm going to spend two points to land a hit. I know I've hit the three. I don't think I've landed a hit on you yet. Ah. Infuriated by this

heinous act, as she was already scorning you for being an embarrassment on the tournament. And you essentially bend the rules with your god lightning power. She turns to you and she screams. And as she does, this purple wave courses from her mouth and just smacks you.

You get to describe your injury. Oh, as the wave hits me, Raiden, covered with green goo, but eyes full of love, is charged off bravely. The hair starts peeling back on my head, blowing all of the hair from the roots. Reydan goes completely bald, eyebrows completely gone. It even blows his nipples off. No hair, no nipples. He's like, Ah! Ah!

Oh no. Oh god. You'll pay for this, Sitchel. Amazing. I just want to say that I just want to say this is my first time at Critical Role and I fucking love it here. Welcome, we're so glad to have you. It's broken here.

I've seen a man's nipples get blown off. This is wild, you guys. And with that, Katana, you are up with Reign on deck. What the fuck? Okay. Katana notices Sindel every so often looking over at the the the tube that Shang Tsung is floating in and realizes that she there's something with that tube about the shank or about Shang Tsung that has her very concerned

so I would like to spend one point to destroy scenery and Katana runs over, jumps up, and just starts stabbing at the glass, breaking, kink, kink, kink, just breaking it apart where it shatters and Shang Tsung's body comes falling out, liquid pouring everywhere. Oh snap. Oh snap. I don't know what that does, but you know,

we're just going to figure it out from there. You see Sindel snap her head and she goes, No! What have you done?! She screams. Another shock wave emanating to you as your hair bursts back. And nipples also. Damn it!

And Kitana goes, Oh! You'll pay for this. All right, Reign. With Johnny Cage on back at the top of the ramp. Good to know. I look down at the body of Shang Tsung, and we've seen Sindel revive bodies before,

and I give her a look. Not this time. And I grab the body and I smash it through the wall of the autopsy room and drive it back down into the laboratory floor. His lifeless body ragdolls and plops into the laboratory floor. Are you moving us to?

Yes. Is that moving all of us? Mm-hmm. Oh. First Sindel goes chasing after you. Very concerned. All right, Ray. Or sorry, Johnny Cage. All right, Ray. Or sorry, Johnny Cage.

Johnny Cage, before we leave, sees his own face on the living body of Goro. And I'm going to use some action points to, it says I can compel someone to draw a drama card. I'm going to compel Goro to draw a drama card because I'm going to ask Goro, hey, I don't normally do this, but there's something about your face

that's really appealing to me. Oh my god! I've had this script that I wrote. It's a sequel to When Harry Met Sally, and I've been looking for a co-star. I think we could call it When Johnny Met Goro. What do you think? I hate it here.

It's a perfect drama card for this moment. Since Travis revived Goro, I'm going to make him play Goro, because this'll be funnier if he responds. Just describe a story that shall be told about the bout you're fighting now. The story shall be told. I woke up and fought for love,

but the idea of starring with you in a movie is more than my simple heart could wish for. Give me a hug. Bring it in, me. Yeah, that's good stuff. We'll get you a dialect coach for the movie, because you got to work on your diction a little bit. Right, okay.

I turn to face Sindel. I don't pose. Yes. You sound like sugar. Water. Just sugar and water. Like this. Raiden, hilariously, you are up.

Oh, is that Matt? Yeah. Yes. I look across the room, seeing this betrayal of my love. Oh my god! And wait a minute, I can Bitter Battle. Do I have enough? I have three action points! I pick up one of the two hamsters trying to escape, I can bitter battle. Do I have enough? I have three action points. I pick up one of the two hamsters trying to escape

and I throw it across the room, trying to strike Johnny Cage in the face. And I will land a hit on the combatant other than the boss. They earn an action point and must give you a ready edge die of their choice from the board. I don't have any readied edge dice. Shit. Oh, are you empty? I'm empty. Ooh!

That's okay. I throw the hamster and it just misses. Then nothing happens. You're gonna miss. I thank you for opening up myself to love. I'm just in the embrace with Goro, and this thing flies by. We don't even notice it.

What, did you hear something, Goro? Destructed hamsters. Sideslab hamsters. It just smacks against the wall on the other side and just explodes like a bug hitting a windshield. I put it in three extra points. Worth it, worth it. Fantastic.

I am up next. The katana on deck. We are in this laboratory. Laboratory D.D. I am chasing after Shang Tsung's body as rain is basically absconding with it. And I take and I scream as I dash towards you, levitating through the air,

and I grab your head and smash it through the wall, grabbing Shang Tsung from your grip as we collide into the next room, destroying scenery in this area and moving us back to the strange science lab, now with Shang Tsung in my grasp. And I am out of action points for this round. Oh snap. Same here.

All right, Katana, who has action points left? I have two. Okay. I do, I do. I have three, but I think I'll just burn them all. Okay. Destroying scenery or something. Sure. With my last two.

Wait, so is Shang Tsung fighting with you? Is he alive? No, he's unconscious. He does not, he's not awake wink, at least at this moment. So wait, do you have any action points? You do have action points. I do. Am I next? I think Reign's. Yes.

Oh, you are. With my last two action points, I expend that to... Kitana is just very uncomfortable with the scene that's unfolded in front of her with this dude making out with another dude, I think. I'm not sure. A hamster just flew by. She doesn't want to see this right now

and disrupts everything. She takes her fan, closes it, runs towards Sindel, and shoves the fan in Sindel's hair and whirls it around her fan, yanks her and throws her through the wall into the next room, back into the archives, and follows her, jumps into the room.

Her hair being a prized possession, she takes this very unkindly. She screams and her body is flung into the next room. Reign, do you have any points left? I do. As I chase after Sindel and Kitana, and I'm assuming the body of Shansung is still in play there. I go from speed to power and change over to the bold offensive stance. Nice. Johnny Cage, do you have any points?

I'm going to burn my points, destroying the scenery. We're in the archives. Yes. I'm just going to tear through all of your magazine collection, seeing if there is an old back issue from Teen Beat. Tiger Beat magazine. Tiger Beat, yeah. I was in one issue a long time ago.

I've been trying to get a copy, but they're expensive on eBay. You and Wilford L. You and Lionheart. Yeah. I find it. End of turn. Are we all out. I find it. End of turn. Are we all out of points?

Yep, out of points. I've got two points left. Oh, you have two points left. Hit it. Too soon. All right, so as I close distance, I don't know why, I've got a horrible feeling about what happens if Shang Tsung is this important to Sindel.

So I grab her hair, whirl her around, and try to slam her into the wall in the hopes that it breaks her hold on the body of Shang Tsung. Okay. It does indeed, as she's already been whipped from one location to the other by her daughter.

She loses grip as she is just flung across the room. You can see her neck snap, probably breaking a few vertebrae in the process as she collapses. She's looking rough. Oh. I'll take it. Is the next round round four?

It is. Ooh. It is. We. It is. We're about to do it right now. Final round! You fight! Final round. This is it, you guys.

This is it. Shit, shit, shit. Oh, you guys. You're so fucking lucky. It's okay. Oh, I love it. You're so fucking lucky. I wouldn't give you this one. Okay. Oh, I love it. Another bad roll for me. Because I'm very close here.

Badabada. Awesome, I'll take the 12. Yeah, okay. Thank you. Seven, and then... Let's see, I'm going to switch stances here. Oh, I can't. All or nothing, baby. All or nothing.

Let's see what let's do. Ba-boo! Let me add some more. Might as well spend them all. Yeah. Ba-boo-boo-boo-boo-boo. Why does everyone sport rounds? This is it.

Lay your cards on the table. Mortal Kombat! Test your might. All right, where are we at in the initiative order? Squawking. 12. I got Squawk. 12. I got a nine. 10.

I got a seven. Okay. This might be over quick. Who's the tough one? Me. Son of a bitch. Oh, come on! You said 12, you said 11?

12 for Reign. 12, 10, nine. Reign. Seven. Seven. Reign, Reign, and Johnny Cage. Get done. And Goro? Reign, Reign.

Somewhere in Goro. This is going to be my coming out project. I'm going to man myself in all the trades. Okay. What to do here? Definitely going to earn a nom. If he gets an award before me, I'm going to be nominated.

That friendship ended fast. Once again, due to her frustration, she's feeling like she's on her back foot. She just lets out another banshee scream. You each can feel the inside of your eardrums pop. As your skin starts to burn, as if a wind burn is just shearing off

the epidermis of your body. You each lose one action point. Oh no! Oh, I can't finish it! Damn it. Rain. But he can. This ends now. I pull a ball of water into the air

and channel it with lightning, and then I tell my friends, I'm going to need your help. Anything you want to add to this, go for it. I'm coming in. I also start crackling. Okay. I throw my fans into your ball of lightning

and it's swirling in there. It's just a ball of lightning and blades flying. Nice. I don't have any powers. Get your little stun gun out. You know what I do? I put my phone on silent. Just for this moment's too good? Wow, that was a huge stop.

Screaming. I'm flattered. I didn't turn it off, it's just on silent. I'll take it, I'll take the wind. I'll take the wind. Do not disturb, one hour. And Reynn takes this ball of lightning and water and blades and flattens into a disk

and hurls it at Sindel's head. Okay, you can see she's already up against the wall, already low, as all of these blades and the Reynn and your frozen ice knives smash her up against the wall. One hits her directly in the forehead, one in her shoulder, another, several in her abdomen, and she is pinned.

And then a pair of sunglasses just come out. Already humiliated, she gets Ray-Bans thrown into her face. As you see, the one that hit her directly into her temple went right through her eye socket. As you can see, blood and goo and organ just dripping out of her eye socket. More blood trickling out of her nose,

but she is still alive. What? As she looks at you, incapacitated. Finish her! Do we finish her? Oh yeah. I think so! I just, I already did my thing.

I threw my sunglasses. Extra hedge knot, you can fling it at her. Oh yeah, I'll start working on it while you guys do what you do. Oh, you've been here. I got an extra scene. You keep going. Yeah, I'll walk up, I'll pin-duff,

and I'll look at Reign, and I'll charge. A lot of lightning crackles up towards my fist and just do the classic first Mortal Kombat uppercut. Yes. And the bolt of lightning arcs through the bottom of her chin, out the top of her head, but the latent electricity leaves her alive. Yeah, amazing.

As you uppercut her, every place that she was pinned, it doesn't hold her in place due to the sheer force of your uppercut. So instead, it just slices her body with each pierce. So at this point, it looks like she is just shredded. Like she has gone through a paper shredder with completely disemboweled as she is standing there, dazed.

As she gets uppercutted on her way down, Katana's fan flies back into her hand. Katana runs up and on her way down, Katana uppercuts a fan just right into her mouth as she lands, mouth open, into her fan. Yeah. And then she opens up her fan and all the blades just slice her cheeks open

like her sister. Incredible. Almost reminiscent to your twin sister. Her jaw is completely ripped from the bottom, or from the top of her skull, as she has this fan that almost gives her that cheeky Sindel smirk. Rain, Johnny Cage, any final words? just gives her that cheeky Sindel smirk. Rain, Johnny Cage, any final words? I'm going to run up, toss a signed thing on her body,

and I'll just do a classic splits nut punch. It's my move. Oh my god! It's all I can do. Your knuckles collide, but she's already been shredded. So you just hit a fleshy, sinewy ooze. Oh god.

Oh god, this nightmare has to end. Vrain grabs Kitana's fan, electrifies it, and then drags it from her mouth straight through bisecting her and drives it into the floor. Fantastic super mortal combat. Literally from top to bottom, Sindel is spliced. And once again, she stands what corporeal form she has left Literally from top to bottom, Sindel is spliced.

And once again, she stands. What corporeal form she has left. After a pause, she just splits like a piece of, like a tree trunk being struck by lightning. As she peels both halves of our body, sloughing down to the floor. Fatality! Sindel has been defeated.

Congratulations. You all have just won Mortal Kombat. Oh yeah! Woo-hoo-hoo! Is there anything else you would like to do? You can start to feel that similar feeling that you have all felt before as you have participated in this,

a little bit of that crackling energy where you know you are about to be teleported back to your realm. I'm going to try to reach around and find my sunglasses. They're $500. They're $500. They're $500. They're dripping with blood and goo, but they're good.

You got those at a Phillips 76. Just to tell the truth. Guys, we put on a good show tonight. I know that this wasn't for the money. There were no cameras. No one will see this, but sometimes it's good to get back to your roots and do something just for the craft. Thanks for making me realize that, Reign.

I think I am ready to be an actor again. I wish you all the best. Yeah. As I turn away, I try to wipe a tear slowly from my eye, slowly tucking in my eye. Into my tunic, so that it can stay close to my heart always. Wait, did you say that we get teleported home? Yes, you're about to get bamfed back to your realm.

Katana looks at everyone and says, gentlemen, it's been a pleasure. Teleports home, she is relaxed, she's on her couch. Ah, never get to see my mother again, thank god. Flips on the TV, ready to relax, and all of a sudden you hear, have you been wrongfully hurt at a workplace? And Johnny Cage pops up on her screen

with a cheesy smile. Oh shit, he's doing. hurt at a workplace and Johnny Cage pops up on her screen with a cheesy smile. Oh shit, he's doing. Paul Goron Cage. He's doing regionals now. And Katana just goes, and just lays back on her couch. Raiden walks over to Reign and extends a hand.

The Pantheon has room for another day more. Ooh. And as they shake, it's the ultimate predator handshake. Yeah! With that crackling of godlike energy between our god of thunder and our god of rain, the lightning creeps up along your forearms as you both dissipate and our god of rain. The lightning creeps up along your forearms

as you both dissipate and banff back to your home realm. What you all miss, though, now alone in this empty chamber in this laboratory, the body of Shang Tsung twitches as the souls from Sindel are pulled from her corpse and are sucked back into the sorcerer. He stands, walks over to her demolished corpse, and flicks a piece of soul energy back into her

as he says, there is work to be done. You're not done yet. And that is where we are going to end this episode. This very special Mortal Kombat one-shot. Thank you guys so much. I have never heard so many good, campy, cheesy one-liners

in a one-shot in my life. You all understood the assignment to a T. And just, 100%. And just a final reminder that although our one-shot tonight took place in Outworld and used characters from the newly released Mortal Kombat one, looks really good, you guys, go check it out. The interpretations of those characters

in the story were not our own creations. Were our own creations. They were. Oh, sorry, sorry, yeah, you're right. The interpretations of these characters here are our creations, not the creations of the Mortal Kombat series. It has nothing to do with the official storyline, but I would like to thank you again.

Just a little bit. Yeah. We diverged. Just a little bit. I would like to thank you again to Warner Brothers Games for letting us play around in their super fun universe. And of course, for sponsoring this one shot.

And certainly not least, I would like to thank all of our amazing players, specifically our two guests, Gina and Nashir. Yay! Love it! That was so fun. Thank you for having us. Yeah! Love it! That was great. Thank you for having us. That was so fun. You guys crushed it.

Is there anything you guys want to tell people where to find you guys? Plugs, plugs. Social plugs. Social plugs. Then you'll see me as Reyn in Mortal Kombat. Hey! Yes, you will.

Yes, you will. So awesome. Thank you for lending your voice here as well. So much fun. So much fun. Awesome. Gina? You can find me on all socials at MissGinaDarling, M-I-S-S-G-I-N-A Darling. I stream four or five times a week,

and I would like to say that this has been equally exciting, fun, and horrifying. Yes. And I can't wait to be back. You both will have to join us again very soon. Thank you so much. And of course, thank you to our residents, Sam and Travis.

Yeah, no bigs. That was great. Thank you all so much. Thanks for tuning in. And... Is it fatality time yet? Rolls off the tongue. Babe-ality.

Babe-ality. Mortal Kombat! Thank you for listening to Critical Role. We hope you enjoyed that exciting adventure and want to come back for more. If you did, well then please leave a rating and review wherever you stream the Critical Role Podcast Network. Word of mouth is the best form of advertising, and maybe your experience will encourage another listener our way. Well, see you next time.