Critical Role - Tag Team At The Teeth: Beyond The Shroud | Critical Role Melbourne Live Show 2025 Part 2

Episode Date: August 19, 2025

Part 2 Check out our 2025 Melbourne Live Show!When characters from both the Mighty Nein and Bells Hells find themselves mysteriously split across parallel realms in The Shattered Teeth, they must unite against a common threat....Join Game Master Matthew Mercer and the cast of Critical Role as Fearne Calloway, Caduceus Clay, Imogen Temult, Fjord Stone, Beauregard Lionett, Orym, and Braius Doomseed work together to uncover the truth behind their interdimensional separation in this unforgettable live adventure! PROLOGUE DESCRIPTION:For some extra lore about our Tag Team at the Teeth Adventure, check out our official Tag Team At The Teeth Prologue: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oq8RYa0M5EkBells Hells have joined the Mighty Nein at sea in search of Ludinus Da'leth and his safe haven in the Shattered Teeth. As they approach one of the Teeth's mysterious islands, the Nein Hells suddenly find themselves split and separated in parallel realms…Tag Team Team At The Teeth: Two separate cities, two separate adventures, one overarching story. Get Live Show in Australia merch now at our Australia Critical Role shop! Check out our Australia-exclusive tee design, our tour tee and hoodie, and a stunning oversized d20 that holds a map of Exandria within it!Link to shop: https://shop.critrole.com.au/ BEACONWe’re excited to bring you even MORE with a Beacon membership! Start your 7-day free trial today at https://beacon.tv/join and get unparalleled access to the shows you love completely ad-free! You’ll receive NEW Beacon exclusive series, instant access to VODs & podcasts, live event pre-sales, merch discounts, & a private Discord. Critical Role's 10-Year Anniversary Melbourne Live Show took place on June 19th, 2025 at the Rod Laver Arena.Emceed by Tom Cardy || https://www.instagram.com/tomycardy/"Paint that Lady," "Monster Truck," and "Mixed Messages" by Tom CardyCharacter Art by Hannah Friederichs || @agarthanguide 

Hey there, Critter Podcast listeners. We have a special new membership service at Beacon.tv, where you can get early access to all new podcast episodes, including Critical Role for the first time ever. Beacon members also get things like live event pre-sales, merch discounts, access to a private community Discord, and new exclusive series like Critical Role Cooldown. Think of it as our digital Critical Role Land.

Head on over to Beacon.TV to check it out for yourself and start a seven-day free trial. Thank you so much for your support, for being a podcast listener, and for being a part of our community. Hey there, Critters. This is Ashley Johnson. And Tell us and Jeffie.

And we're popping in here to talk about our new podcast on Beacon Weird Kids. In this series, we're diving into our lives as former child actors, from unraveling our eccentric upbringings to embracing all the delightfully odd interests we still have today. covering so many topics like antique toys, taxidermy, Japanese pop culture, and honestly, anything

else we come up with. Weird Kids is available exclusively on Beacon, but good news, we're offering a one-month free trial on Beacon.tv so you can take a look before you become a member. Just use the code weirdos at beacon.tv to start the trial. You can also find fellow weirdos by following the series on our at the Weird Kids pod Instagram and using the hashtag Weird Kids. So to all the misfits, outcasts, and weirdos out there, come take a seat at our table and celebrate all things unconventional, nostalgic, and wonderfully weird. Welcome to Weird Kids.

New episodes release every Tuesday. Hi again, Critters. It's Sam Riegel, and you're listening to Part 2 of this episode from the Critical Role Podcast Network. If you haven't checked out part one yet, pause this now and head over there first. Otherwise, enjoy part two. Friends, we love you, Australia. All 11,000 and eight of you. We love you.

Look at all those hearts. Look at all those. Oh, man. So many modes of possibility. Hang on, before we get started, where's my. my mom. Mom? Hi, Mom! Hi! Hi!

I was wondering where you were. I kept looking for you. Hi. Like a lot of people. Love you. I'm your mother. You did. You did good, mom. I'm your mommy. I'm your mom. Sorry.

Oh, man. Sorry, not sorry. As you clamber, ever close to the food. northeastern edge of the island's seaside cave. You have a breath amongst yourselves as you glance into the switchback pathway that leads into the dark interior.

The beginning of traversing what awaits you within the island proper. Is there any way you wish to prepare? Before we do anything, do we want to, I mean, I think some healing may have to happen. Yes, please. Yes, please. Basically or emotionally?

Well, I can't do anything about the emotional damage right now. That's really up to you. Emotional damage. Mr. Caduceus, are you going to do some healing or do you want me to or should we both? I mean, you're welcome to do some healing if you like, but I was going to do some healing.

We could both do some healing. I wouldn't mind from both of you. Oh. At the same time? Just a little dunkeroo action. I don't know what that means. I don't know fully what that means. Is there about to be a tag team at the teeth?

Oh no! He's on fire. Bull cow fawn action? Bow cow... Wow. The Nicodronus tower. The only thing, Mr. Caduce, is I was going to do a prayer of healing, but I don't, um...

I don't know who to pray, too. Have any suggestions? suggestions? At the moment, uh, at the moment, I, uh, I've been thinking, do you want to just get on your knees and pray to me? Wow. I, I stop playing sultry jazz flute.

I have, I've been through a lot, and I've been, I've been praying to, to my, my love. I've been praying to the people I know. I have not necessarily tried to connect to the Wild Mother yet. What if you don't have any loved ones? Well, I think that perhaps this is a, I think perhaps this would be a great way to start having some loved ones, sir.

Oh, all right. All right, so I'll do as the lady asked, and I'll get on my reverse knees. I'll join you in a prayer of healing so that we can actually both. All right. How many levels do you want to do? What level do you want to take this to? Let's go five, baby. Oh, wow, really?

This is what it sounds like when doves cry. You go first, and then I'll go for it. I'll see how it goes. Anybody who need... How many people are hurt, by the way? One, two. Is there only three people hurt? Notice which side of the table they're on.

Oh, I'm not going to do prayer. You do prayer. I'll just deal with what's left. All right, I close my eyes and I say a prayer to you, Lady Fern. Okay. For your faith in me. for your large, hearts.

So big, so big. For your heaving trust in me. And for your dewy, sort of pillowy. Decimal system? Desimal. That's for the old's in the audience. Last time the Dewey Decimal System got a laugh in the broad labor arena. To your breast, to your health.

Okay. 32 points of. Oh, wonderful. To who? To who? To everyone around me. Wow. Oh, thank goodness.

Does anyone else need a little bit of healing, or are we good? On this side? No, we're good. Fern, you're good? You need a little more? I mean, listen. Okay, here we go. All right, in that case, I'm going to just cast, where did it go?

That snake really, the knee snake really did a run. Yeah. They do that. I'm going to cast cure wounds at fourth level then just to finish that up. That ought to do it. Where's my? Clerics are so cool. Yeah, we are.

They're pretty great. We are the best. What would you do without us? you'd die. Can I know on that? Five, six. Oh, wow. It's 16, 17, 15, 15, 18, 19, 20, 22, 23, 25, 6.

27 points of healing on that one. Two-eighths on some of that, yeah. I'm doing good. I'm doing good. Can I ask, like, if, without hit points, I know that's, like, feeling hurt. What does it feel like when we lose a hit dice? It feels like a tiny shard of your physical confidence is stripped away, let alone. You know, when you have the onset of a flu and your body begins to sweat but still feels freezing on the inside,

it's like that, but it doesn't go away. And it gets worse with each one lost. I'm sweating a lot. A lot. so we have to go up this mountain into the cave we got to go into the cave I'm so sorry that's what I meant inside it not up and we're doing this solely on the recommendation of the new guy oh okay no and Orim you saw something right

well Orum's tripping balls so I'm keyed in baby I see everything Okay, Wall Street. Ethel, do you have any idea why these jellyfish, all these creatures are keyed into the emotions of everything that's happening here? I mean, you've been here the longest. Surely you knew something. I don't know, and that's what's most upsetting. I don't know why I'm the only one, why everyone I know has been turned into either stones, or I'm just surrounded by these spirits that vaguely look like people that,

I knew, but at the same time, feel like a whole not a lifetime to me. What was it that you did that they didn't do? I don't know. Did you run? Were you a big pussy? No, I'm not a big pussy. I'm not. It's okay. You can admit it. If you don't, please don't say that to me because I'll cry and then I'll be attacked again. And I'll cry because I was attacked.

And then it's a vicious cycle of self-flagellation. You've been here this long and you haven't had all your hit, hit. I just don't understand how you've been here this long and you don't feel all sweaty and fluey. You know what I mean? That's not, I do, I don't feel great. You're absolutely right, but it doesn't feel like that all the time. It feels like I'm kind of missing something intrinsically.

Well, maybe compartmentalizing your emotions is just a short-term solution. Maybe you need to confront them. Head on. Okay. That sounds dumb. I go and stand next to... No, I mean, they're right. There's...

There's part of the missing. What do you mean? Ethel is different than everything else I've seen here. There's a... well, beyond that. Do you want to have another go with the jellyfish? What's your deal? You are super agro tonight, Imogen. Look, I told you in the zone of truth.

No, that's fair. Also, he started it. Well, listen to your friends, Pepple Hare. They're cool. You think you're buttering us up, but that's actually not gonna work. I appreciate it anyway. Yeah, we've decided to work as a team here, so perhaps we will follow your lead to this cave,

and hopefully something will reveal itself, something that turns the tide in our favor. Okay. And as we go down there, as a show of good faith, I'm going to say something I didn't expect to say. Thank you very much for helping me. I appreciate it. Shut the fuck up. Let's go.

I'm going to do an insight check just to see if he's being... Make an insight check. Ethel, roll a D20, and add either your persuasion or deception. Don't tell me which. Just tell me what the total. Nice cat. It's going to... I have to be a 20.

Dirty, dirty. Dirty 20. Is it a dirty 20? Did he say 20 or 30? You said a dirty 20. 158. Natural. Whoa.

22. Oh. Oh. Is he evil? Does he? Does he eat poo? What? Does he an evil?

What sense of your honesty does Brayas glean from your person? you get a sense that through the heart exterior and the darting eyes pretending to be like trying to re-tune his flute but you can't tune a flute so he's just fucking around with it you can tell that he is

there is definitely a hidden shaded thankfulness and gratefulness that isn't just some malevolent like tricking you there is a deep thankfulness All right. There's a deep thankfulness.

Sam, every time I look down at you, I can't fucking not laugh. Yeah, I know. Well, thank you, my love. Oh. Oh, possums. I love you so much. My sweet possums.

Oh, my God. Feels perfectly normal for me. Look, if you don't trust me, you can talk to the spirits. I'll get them. back over here, they can talk to you. No, no, no, no. Trust is earned, and I think you've earned it here. We should keep going. Wait a second. Why are you guys here? Well, we were actually separated from the rest of our group, and we made landfall here on this island, searching out

a powerful archmaid named Ludeness Deleth, and we're trying to find the rest of our group, but also to try and glean where he might be in all this. Perhaps he has caused it, but we've come upon you and your people have been affected, and now we're trying to figure out maybe if we can help you would also help us in the same turn. You've lost part of your group. Yes. Yeah. Half. Exactly. And he touches the sort of part where you saw that kind of

whole, black hole, and he's like, I think, I think we should go down. All right. We should go all the, stop smiling at me. We should go down. To the cave. And we should stay down. Yeah.

Someone mentioned south. Until the job is done. Yes. Does that boat, does that check out? Yeah, it's easy. Yeah, easy, easy. Yeah. Hold your breath.

One by one, you trek in line down the sea cliff pathways, hearing the crash of the ocean against the rock and glancing down into the brackish, dark ocean waters that give different texture and color than the familiar physical world of Exandria that you're used to, You swear you can see 10 feet beneath the waves, shapes that look like mournful faces, eyeless, the mouths open, looking up towards you,

fading into the shadow as they shift and churn. I want to punch a ghost so bad. I don't, if I'd say hello to one of those faces just as we're walking by, does it acknowledge a hello? How do you say hello? Hello. Oh. Yes.

Hello. Hey, what's up? But Dave. It does not seem to acknowledge you correctly. The ocean shifts as you look down. The face seems to vanish beneath another wave that crashes over onto the nearby stone, and you glance back where it was,

and you have a hard time finding it. You can't tell if it's an illusion or just the shaded memory of hundreds of drowned individuals over the millennia over the millennia, this island has existed. This is the plane between life and death, and it is here, especially in the absence of the matron at the time being. The laws of the purgatory realms are a bit up in the air. Following Ethel a bit further,

you turn the corner into an opening, this seaside cavern that is about 200 feet across from end to end, and as the water inlet pours into the interior, cavern, the dark lit inside itself, greets you. Those of you with sources of light or torches, you can make use of it. You ignite a series of your arcane spheres that alight the path as you curl inward. And here you can see towards the deep back of it, there is indeed a number of caverns that seem to splinter off from a somewhat shallow, beached area to the far end. And also, glancing about within, you can see the rock walls are smoothed from extended

centuries, perhaps even longer periods of time of the seawater at different tides rising up and smoothing the surrounding stone. But you see almost like marbled veins of hints of shined ore that on the far end look like they've been broken and chiseled in places or carved away, as well as you focus still the hint of thin, glowing, spider-like webs of light that seem to extend amongst parts of the wall like some sort of an alien vain network

that seems to have burned its way into the stone. The second thing that catches your eye towards the back of the inlet is a mighty ship, a galleon of some kind that sits kiltered to one side it looks dilapidated

and beached onto that interior sand the sails themselves tattered and gone the hull of it filled with three or four larger holes a wrecked ship that remains abandoned here in this ghostly cavern space I rushed forward searching for any sign of a name

of this vessel along the side of any indication of what this ship could be. Make an investigation check for me if you could. Can I use my dancing lights to light his path so he can have a better view? Certain. Kick ass. Not as good. 25, investigation.

25. You gather the portion of the ship where the title itself would have been is unmarked, meaning this ship does not belong to any sort of Pardon me. Any sort of a fleet. The name of this ship is intentionally either been scraped, lost, or not printed upon it. It does look like it was fitted once with exterior cannonwork. The second thing you noticed is at you begin to investigate its exterior and look within, there is shattered and sea foam-logged furniture that is overturned. You can see there are elements of a lived-in interior, as well as a few scattered tools.

You see some splintered crates and some pickaxons and other tools that don't normally accompany a wandering sea vessel. And with that investigation rule, you also notice that there are clusters of mind ore that were taken from the edges of these veins that seem to be clusters. and set within this ship like it was a shipment of some kind. It was being gathered in mine from this interior. And indeed, some of these caverns that splinter off, these large cracks that wind upward and further into the heart of the mountain, it looks like some of them were chipped away from some sort of prolonged mining endeavor.

You also feel the air chills as the shadows of the space grow darker and a slight voice hits the wind. It's been so long since the warmth has been felt. Yo, Fern. Yeah. Is this that ghost pirate that you always tell us about it that you fucked?

He sounds just a little different. Okay. This could be another one. Boys. I don't think it's him. But you did just remind me. Bring the blue one to me. At which point?

Bring the blue one? You watch as glowing shapes, spectral figures begin to rise out of the ruined ship. You see what looks like partially decomposed figures, humanoid, with long tattered coats and hats. You see, as they reach down and draw actual rusted barnacle-covered blades, scimitars, and ancient pistols that look like they've been water-logged and lost to rust in time. But as they lift them up, they seem to take on a spectral renewed visage all their own as three of these pirate spirits begin to rise up and float in the air above, and one feminine form with a massive tricorn hat and long, tattered,

Rocks rises. Oh. Oh. Oh. I would like you all to roll initiative. No. Oh, shit. Oh, my God.

Oh, boy. You gotta be shitting me, Matthew, fucking Mercer. Plus the D8. Oh, my God. Ooh. Oh. No fucking way.

way. Not in Australia, man. Crikey. That's where all prisoners go. Oh. All right. 25 to 20. 31.

Whoa. Whoa. Oh, my God. Oh. Dirty 20. Crazy. All right. Dirty 20? Dirty 20.

Uh, could you with, uh, oh. Dirty 20 rollies? Rullies. A three-way rollies. Three-way? Wait, I think it was just me and orum. Oh, you also got a dirty 20? They also got a dirty 20.

Oh! Oh! 13. 16. Seven. So we're gonna go. Orum. Brayeth. Yes, Batty. And then.

And then. All right. Oh. 20 to 15. 19. 15. 17. 17.

Okay. Ford. Ford, Caduceus, Imogen. All right, 15 to 10. At 12. Okay. What you got, Ethel? I rolled a one. No!

Ethel bringing up the rear. That's okay. Can Orum's Bountiful Luck counter that since it's a D20? It's an ability check. Sure. Okay. Yeah, we're a little late in the game. We're a little late in the game, but let's try it.

Ethel roll again. Yeah. Let's go. OK, that's better. That's 18. That's 18. That'll put you after Ford. After Ford above Caduceus.

Thank you very much. Actually, roll these. Roll these. Roll 1 d.20. Oh. Oh, 20. Oh, yeah, you win. All right.

So I just get a 1. You get 20. Ford and Ethel. Got it. All right, top of the round. Beauregard. You're up with Oremond deck. as these three pirate spirits lift up

and what appears to be a figure of influence and authority rises above them all. Listen, you know that crazy X that just won't go stay away? So convenient, she waited until Jester was out of town, too. Crazy. What a coincidence. She's been on your Facebook, bro. All right.

First and foremost, I am going to spend key two. I'm going to spend four key points. I can do this for freezes to do empty body, where I go invisible and I have resistance to all damage, minus force damage for one minute. Alrighty. Let's go, level 20, monk. Three, four, confirm.

And then I'm assuming I recognize. I recognize the... Alpha? Yeah. I'll allow you to make a perception check if you'd like. Oh, really? For, okay. Sure.

Why, why now? Why this? Natural 20. Yes! Yes! Okay. That could have been on my attack. Shut up, don't you ever that!

This ghostly spectral captain figure in the large tricorn hat you see has dense, Dense braids, that kind of billowed beneath, and you see the toothy skull jaw below a mostly tattered face. The attire that first caused you panic is not as familiar as you thought. And in this instance...

Thank you, God. Whoa. Okay. This does not appear the, I assume, you thought was Avantica. No, I wasn't sweating it. I don't know what the fuck you guys were talking about. But a different female, more skeletal captain to a ship that is unrecognizable in this instance. So I don't recognize her? You do not.

But they are floating about 20 feet above you. Fuck her. Floating? They're ghosts, Beauregard, yes. Good thing I punch ghosts. Let's go, baby. Okay, I'm going to call her not Vantica. Great, groovy.

I'm going to run up, so she's floating 20 feet above me. Yeah. Awesome. As I run up, I am going to punch my fists as I sprint off, activating my lightning gloves. Awesome. And I'm going to run, and as I kind of, with my unarmored movement, kind of like, skip across a few puddles, do a big barrel roll,

and I'm going to do a pop-pop with my lightning gloves at a distance. Fantastic. 20 feet. Let's go. A pop, baby. This is against the captain? Yeah, go for the boss, bitch. Let's go.

Okay, these are plus 13 hits. Two, pop pops. Natural 20 again, bitchy! Let's go! And the second one is going to be an 18 to hit? 18 total? Yeah. That just hits.

That's what I see, this or you see, and that's what I see. God damn. Okay, okay, okay. Let's first start with the with the natural 20. Let's go. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Big money, yeah, that's good, baby.

That's a nine on the damage die, so nine, 18, plus another seven is 31? 34. 34. 34 points of damage. Stunning strike. Can you stun a ghost? Unfortunately, this is immune to stuff.

Disbitch. on purpose. All right, that's fine. And for the second attack... Got to be Ghostbuster just than a ghost. 14 damage. 14 damage, all righty.

I'm going to spin a key point... Hang on, let me keep track of my key point, so that was... I'm assuming that was one for the stunning strike. Correct. No, okay. I'm going to do one more to do flurry of bows. Let's go.

Two more strikes. Pop, pop. Pop. Pop! Pop! Up! Ooh! That's a one and a two.

Give it and it taketh away. How close is Beauregard to Orem? Beauregard, I'd say, having charged forward and done the spin-off, I'd say about 25, 30 feet from you. Cancel the one. I get to re-roll it? Rerol that one, yeah. Let's go. Reaction.

Yeah, that's fantastic. That is going to be 30 to hit. That'll hit. Fantastic. Here we go. That is going to be another 14 points of damage. All right. Extract aspects. Extract aspects. All right. These. Vulnerabilities, damage resistances, damage immunities, and condition immunities. Indeed. They are immune to cold damage. They are immune to necrotic damage. They are immune to poison damage. Cold. Cold, necrotic.

Poison. They are vulnerable to radiant. They're vulnerable. They are vulnerable to radiant. Indeed. Amazing. I'm just going to shout out to the crowd. Avoid cold shit and hit him with holy shit.

After these series of attacks on the Captain Captain's like, Oh, you think you're the smart one here. Newsflash I am, motherfucker. Bring them low. We must return. Bring them low. All right, that finishes Bo's turn. Orim, you're up with Braith on deck. Orham had already started running

and is flying through the air over Bo's head and seedling out slashes the air three times sending shockwaves through the air. I'll use seedling attacking at range at her above. Yeah, yeah. Okay. First is a... 27 to hit.

That hits. Okay, that is, and we'll make this a goading attack. Sure. That is, three plus up, it's 14 plus a five. So 19 on the first. She has to beat Wisdom of 19. 21 beats it. Okay.

Next attack, goading attack. Same attack roll. All right, that hits, roll damage. Goating attack. Two, this is 13. So I was 18, it has to be to 19. 18 damage, all right. That is another 22.

Goating attack. That's not going to hit. So that is a 19 to hit? No, 19 hits. Oh, that hits? Yeah. Goating attack. 14 plus 10.

19 points of damage. 19 points of damage. Slash the air. 19 wisdom. It's a 24. I rolled really good on those saving throws for a goading attack, which is great. Got it.

We'll see if I can carry that luck over into their turn. Is that fish your turn, or are you up? Yeah, I'm just testing this ghost lady, and I splash down below next to Beauregard. Spitzh! Into the center of this, like, cavern space. The ocean itself is the waves are coming in. Finishing Orm's turn, Brayas, you're up.

Matthew. Yes. The Navantica lady is hovering above us. about 20 feet off the ground, yes. I can't get there. And what about the other ghosties? They're about 10 feet up. I think I could probably reach them.

With a decent, I'll say with a decent athletics check, I'll allow it. Okay. I want to hit her so bad, but I can't. Make me fly someone. Matt, I use my reaction to make Sam fly. All right, I will go for one of the ghosts. instead. Fair enough. The three other kind of gnarly looking spectral skeletal ghosts lie there. I'll say you choose the one to the right, which is closest to you. You run and try and leap

towards it, make an athletics check for me. Oh, come on, come on. 16 plus stuff. 20E3. That's plenty enough to do it, so go ahead and roll your attack. I will use divine smite at level three and also shining smite as my bonus action. Sure. I will attack. 20 to hit? 20 hits? Yes. I swing my flail around and I deal a whole bunch of damage.

Okay. Seven, eight, 14, 18. Uh-huh, 24. Oh, man. 33. 40 damage. And some of that is radiant. How much of it is radiant?

Uh-huh, uh-huh. Ten is radiant. You did divine smite on this? Is divine smite radiant? Yes, it is. Oh, well, then a lot more is radiant. And these are considered undead, so you do an additional D8, by the way. Oh, God.

Well, then that's another one. Okay. What's the total of radiant damage on that? Radiant damage then would be 20 radiant. So that would be 40 radiant. Ooh! Okay. That is, you do this massive overarching strike.

Wham! Into this one ghost pirate. withdraws back. You hear this hizzling sissing sound. Hizzling sissing? It's a new one. It's hizzling and sizzling sissing? You were here for it.

Why do I do this? You were here for it. Melbourne. Kill me. I want a nice hizzling, sissing kangaroo burger. I want to hear this. For the next 10 years, thank you.

Boy, I can hear the whole audience. shivering and queafing right now. Oh, boy. As it sizzles and hisses and withdraws about five feet behind you, that's your first attack. You have a second attack? I have a second attack. I should have really learned this character.

All right, I'll swing again. That is a 22 to hit. That hits. Go ahead. Roll day. This will just be normal damage, which is pretty good. 825. How much is radiant? I don't know, Matt. One of your D8 should be radiant.

Okay, then it was the four. It's a four radiant. It should be an extra eight on that. Okay, got it. So, heavy impacting strike on a second swipe down with your flail as it impacts this spirit. You see it kind of pull back. It kind of shakes in space and its form kind of, you know,

not going to say the word. It quakes. It's not dead? No. I did like 100 points of damage. I think you should recheck your math. Yeah, no, it's fine. Have you seen how strong I am?

I did, and it wasn't strong enough. Oh! As that finishes your turn, the three spectral Wanderman ghosts swoop down and retort. One of them is going to, I put my pen down. I got a pen here. Fuck that pencil.

I didn't need it anyway. It's going to, first one's going to go ahead and sweep down. and move within range to you, Brayas, after you struck it heavily. It's going to go ahead do multi-attack of part of its ghost slash and spectral pistol one to one. So the first attack is going to be a 22 to hit.

Oh, that's my armor class. That hits you, and the pistol is even higher. So you take 21 points of slashing damage from the first ever came strike as it backs up and spectral pistol lights up. And let's loose this massive puff of spectral energy and smoke, and you take an additional 15 points

piercing damage. The second Specter is going to swoop down and come after you, Beauregard. I am invisible. Why? It's going to swing and fire in the direction it thinks you are and it has disadvantage on the attacks because of it. Empty body. Level 20, monk shit. That is a miss because it's rolled really bad with the disadvantage. Second one with the pistol shot. I don't know, with a natural three. It takes two shots, no impact, has no idea where you are splashing in the wall.

the spectral gun pistol just explodes into nowhere. The third button is going to swoop around and come after you, Eiffel. But I'm so cute. First heavy strike. It's going to be an 11 to hit. Tuck out of the way. Pistol shot is going to be better.

19 to hit. Yeah, but as it goes to shoot me, I go, but one of you missed, not all of your friends would hate you. A searing word, so. Searing word, all right, Stuart 4012. Come on, come on, baby, big money. That's a natural one, mother-pricle.

Oh, boy. So, wait, what does that bring it down to? It brings it down to an 18. That's one more than my armor class. It still takes the 2D. Hell yeah, okay. So, enjoy this. Oh, 12, that's pretty good.

There you go, 12 points of fire damage. It ignites that one ghost upon it trying to fire at you, It's swinging its blade and pulls back. Mistress, this one feels different. No, I'm just the same as these idiots. Hey, we're all the same. Oh, so scared of you. Turns us.

Then let's feast of its life for us. Finishing the ghosts go. They're all coming once close to you. All right, cool, got that. Ford, you're up with Ethel on deck. DM, can I ask a question? Yes, you may. As Orma is watching with his 35 passive perception and Trucite,

does the ghost ringleader have two arms? Complete. With that combination of spell and passive perception, you see live shows next year. Oh, my God. Their arms are indeed complete. Okay. Who did you think it was?

Ripley. Ripley. Oh. Not everything's connected to your lore, guys. But nevertheless, for it, what do you want to do? With my bonus action, I will use Hex Blades curse to curse the ringleader, the pirate, the undead, yes, the captain. And then with my action, I will use Eldrit's Blast.

Let's go. And at level 20, I will get four attacks, and I will fan the hammer. Let's go, baby. I rolled two of these already. That's another one. So it's a 30 to hit on the first one. That hits. 20 to hit on the second.

That hits? 23 to hit on the third. That hits. And 13? Nah. Fair enough. That's 17 points of damage on the first. 15 points of damage on the second.

14 points of damage on the third. All righty. Is that radiant? Impacting with your Eldish Blast, smashing into the spectral ghost captain as it pulls back, Ah, they got some fight in them, they do. Let's saffered it off.

We'll be free from the shackles. Bring them to me. You watch this, she almost seems to swell with fury. The weird kind of ghostly green-blue color almost starting to burn like an orangish-red color. So I finish your turn forward? Yes, 46. of damage in my turn. He's done.

You got it. Finishing Ford's go. Ethel, you're up. Ethel turns to the ghost captain and something that he's been thinking of to say for quite a while. You can see he's been ticking over. He says, hey, you don't like holy stuff, huh? Well, is this holy?

And he points to his flute. Oh my God. But in saying that, this kind of hunched over, like, he seems like six foot hunched over, sort of like awkward. He like opens up to breathe, and only now do you realize that he is like, seven and a half feet tall and with that uses musical exorcism his eyes glow and he just

breathes in and just this huge sound rushes out of both sides and like bounces off this wall go ahead and see if you can aim that note i'm going to aim that note baby that note got to aim that note that's a 28 28 now because this is an undead creature you're You do additional damage as part of this ability. Go ahead and roll that. Yeah, I get to roll lots of dice today. Good day. Good day to be a dice, huh?

That's six, 12, 13, 14. 22 points of psychic damage against this entity. As you rock it into its brain, like the note creans into the captain. It pulls back. You see its eyes go wide. The blackened kind of vacuous skull. spaces with a little flickering flames in the middle kind of turn towards you angrily. It shifts back to you, Ford, and back to you.

I would like Ford and Ethel to both make persuasion checks to try and chuck off the attention to the other. That's going to have to be 19. 18. Oh! Oh! The captain furiously turns his attention as the spiritual energy burns a bright red and it comments towards you, Ford.

One of the other ghosts kind of holding its proximity next to you. It gets the captain's focus that within his targets within five feet, the captain has advantage on its attacks. It's going to unleash its vengeful frenzy. It'll make a ghost slash attack at you. If the attack hits, it makes another attack, and it keeps making attacks until it misses. Oh, no, no! Matthew fucking Mercer.

Is she still at a range? Is she still floating? No, she's like drifted down on top of Ford now, so she's about 10 feet off the ground. Okay. First attack? Yeah, no, that's going to be a 30 to hit you. Jesus!

You take 21 points of slashing damage, Ford. 21 points I will take with my reaction, the Star Razor will, with radian damage, 12 points of radiant damage flash against the attack. Ooh, so it makes it 24. points here any damage against the captain has the vulnerability of reading furiously attacks again for a 24 to hit you yeah bitch that hits take another 21 points of slashing damage my god uh the next attack is going to be a 20 to hit you

uh that also hits you take another 21 points of slashing damage the next attack is going to be a 21 to hit you Jesus that hits take another 21 points of slashing damage oh this is a lot of math you guys The next attack is a natural 20. Fuck! Silvery barbs! No, you don't even have to. I'm just going to do... I'm going to use...

I have silvery barbs. Okay, that'll... You do? Yes. All right. My favorite spell. Okay, that'll turn it into a 23 to hit you. That hits.

Shit. Take 21 points of slashing damage. I'm okay. I'm cool. I'm cool. The next attack is going to be a 27 to hit you. Now, here's the thing. Now, remind me, you have... Now remind me, you have armor of shadows, right? And you have this creature hexed.

Oh, I do! I just remembered that. I was just so taken with your charisma. Let's go ahead and roll the dice and see if you take it. Four. Wait. That cancels it. Because that misses.

Yeah. The first attack you missed entirely. As Ford is carved down by strike after strike, you watch as your friend is bloodied and pulled apart, and then we pull back from the eye of four. as he sees this possible reality, channeling his friend to Caleb and his glance into the beacon and goes,

not today, Satan. As the first strike of the captain goes wide and is consumed with the shadowy darkness. How about just to keep it fair because you thought of it and I didn't, we'll stop it there, and that'll be the one that misses. I love that, let's go for it. No, there's so much damage.

Yeah, but now I'm covered with blood and cuts, and it makes me look. fucking sexy. That's true. Fair trade. All right, that finishes the captain's turn. The captain is going to glide up and fly beyond your reach, which gives you an attack of opportunity.

Yes, it does. Or did you have to use your reaction for that. So yeah, still have your reaction. Go for it. Oh, I don't because I used the radiant burst from Star Razor. That's right. The captain just shoots up about 30,000. feet above the water. Would she go past me? Not past you, but above you.

Cute... Sentinel? I'm curious if... That's not a sense. Okay, okay. I was curious. It's hard to remind. I'm glad you reminded me about armor of hexes.

It's just one of the things on this giant fucking page of level 20, Ford shit. Caduceus, you're up with a midgeon on deck. All right. First thing we're going to do is I'm going to... make my way over to Orum and kind of I don't know why I bother. Where did it go?

There he is. And I'm just going to kind of very quietly ninja run my way behind. You know, the Naruto Run. Narado Run, that's what they call it. Yeah. Grab you by the shoulders. How are you feeling, buddy?

This is the best day ever. It's about to get better. And I tap him and I cast Holy Weapon. So all your hits now have an extra 2D8 radian. Enjoy. That's awesome. And then I'm going to make a path. Making a path.

Path in your way. Trying to get a nice center point, and I'm going to cast turn undead. And yes, I can do both in one turn, I checked. Yes, because Holy Weapon is a bonus act. Yes, it is. All right, let's go. So for the captain, that's going to be, it's a wisdom?

I believe I'm trying to find it again. Yeah, it's a, let's see. Where's a Constitution? I think it's a wisdom-saving role, I believe. I believe it's wisdom as well. That's going to be a 13. I'm trying to find my number. for that, sorry.

It's your Spell DC, buddy. Oh, Spell DC is 19. Yeah, that's a failure. Yeah. Other ghosts. Natural two, that's a fail. That's going to be... It's an 18, that's still a fail.

Out of curiosity, also, what are their... The last one. All of them fail. So my other question there then is also, what is their level, their... Challenge rating? Challenge rating. The standard ghosts are challenging.

The standard ghosts are challenge rating five. Captain is higher. Yeah, never mind. They're fine then. But they are fearful. They are fearful. Yeah, they are. Okay.

That means their attacks are a disadvantage and they move away from you on their turn. No. That's good image and you're up with Fernon deck. All right. I am going to activate my runes on my cloak, on my rows. Okay. Which bamps up my spell DC by two.

And then I'm going to cast at seventh level. Psychic Lance. Oh, no, pirate, what's your fuck? Leave no doubt. All right. I think it's Rashon, guys. All right, is that intelligent saving throw? That's an intelligent saving throw.

Lark and watch. Ooh, that's gonna be a four. Failed. So she takes she takes 10 D6 psychic damage and she is incapacitated until her next turn. Go ahead and roll that damage.

Oh, no. Yes, ma'am. Five. Eight. You still just have one? I know, I didn't do it. Eleven. Eleven, the three dice

to roll the men. Okay, wait. How many roll? Nice did I just roll. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine. Okay. Eleven plus, oh God, okay, fifteen, nineteen, twenty-four, thirty-three points of psychic damage. Thirty-three points of psychic damage.

Oh! Just above average. And she's incapacitated. She's incapacitated. Yeah, which I don't know, what does that mean? It means on the turn they can't take action. This bonus action. That's pretty great.

But she's still flying? Yeah, she's still hovering there. Like, just kind of like locked into this terrible psychic static in the middle of this actual brain. Oh, no. Does that finish your turn? Yes, it does. Alrighty. Fern, you're up with Bow on deck.

Okay. Hi. I am going to cast Flame strike. Which means anything that's a deck save, she fails automatically. Oh, hold on. Let me just double-check this then. Okay, yes, all right, flame strike. The old magic spelling.

Yes. Ah, did, bo didi-didi. Yeah. All right, so flame strike at sixth level. Yeah. So that'll be a Dex save of 19. No? No. Just kidding.

Yes, I'm serious. Sorry. That's a fail on one ghost. A natural one in the second. second ghost, and an 18 on the third ghost, which your spelled easy is 19, you said? Well, so, okay, so hold on. There's a vertical column of divine fire,

which roars down from the heavens. Each creature in a 10-foot radius, but it's a 40-foot high cylinder. So I was trying to aim for her. Okay, so just her, not the other ghosts. Well, I mean, if they could get in there, that'd be awesome. I think you'd give one other one, I'll say, and I failed.

Okay, good enough. All right, so one of them you got, and the captain automatically fails. So go ahead and roll damage on that. All right, so I believe that's 5D6 fire damage and 5D6 Radiant damage. That's correct. Whoa!

Roll the fire damage first. All right. Hold on, hold on. Give me a minute. Okay. That was a good one. Eight, thank you. Thank you for the dives.

Okay, so that's... I want those back. Aw. No. 15 points of fire damage. 15 points of fire damage. All right, come on, big money, big money.

All right, that's okay. Oh, you can. 20 points of Radiant. Doubles to 40 points of radiant damage. It's both those targets. Fern, how do you want to do this? Two for two, baby! On the bad bitch?

On the captain. Yeah. Wait for real? How do you want to do this? As the captain is held aloft, pierced by a psychic lance that keeps it almost pinned in the middle of the air of this dark cavern, the sound of the waves crashing nearby,

the spectral ship also itself giving off a ghostly glow like they're in the process, like the captain's in the process in the process of calling forth other members of its vanished crew. You reach up and call down this column of divine fire and light and describe to me how you finish this. Oh, boy.

All right, I wasn't quite prepared for this. All right, I'll shoot the flame cylinder up into the air. I'll say, get down here, you dumb bitch. And I'll pull her down. You watch as the rock above you, seems to crack and other bits of stone fall forth, almost like an additional fissure in the mountain above opens, and where it does, the single stream of red, orange, light

kind of pears down slowly, gently hitting the water top before it opens up and explodes. This blast of white hot fire seems to burst from the water itself and engulf the captain. You hear the shriek. You're welcome. And as the flames subside, you watch as the ghost itself vanishes the slight phrase, it says, Ah, Sli, and her spectral form is dissipated.

The other ghosts that were already fearful, suddenly go wide-eyed and scatter to the side of the chamber and vanish. The glowing ship itself goes cold once more, and the cavern is now still and empty. Was that it? That doesn't feel like this is it, that's it. The ore that they were mining from the veins in this wall,

can we identify what the ore is made of, what they were trying to collect and perhaps use as shipments on this? Sure, if you want to make an intelligence check for me. Oh, this character, no problem. 16. 16. There is a quartz-like crystal here, but you're not quite certain what this material is. It doesn't feel like something you've seen often or in trade circles. It's a unique sort of crystal,

but you also notice amongst parts of it and parts of the nearby stone that weird like light gossamer spider-web-like texture seems to be spread in places. That until you get close and focused, it's almost impossible to see. But as you're also looking and inspecting the space, you see some of the nearby cracks in the nearby caverns. Light beams seem to pass through. Like a massive lantern or torch

is like passed in front of slats. Light, v-v-v-v-v-v-v-s seems to come across. Like some burning massive source of energy and light is kind of coasting through the core of this mountain beyond your vision, but enough to send brief beams and scattered shadows throughout your chamber and this low buzz, this weird ominous hum kind of.

of... Can I... Can I pocket the oar in the bag of holding and can I point in the direction that the light seems to be emanating from and direct our party towards the source? Indeed. You all catch both Ford's glance, finger pointing,

and the kind of source of this light, especially you o'am, you're saying everything. But it seems like some of these kind of snaking cavern entrances that pour and curl upward, deeper into the mountain above something. some source of this light is nearby and passes, may be drawn by the sounds of recent combat

before drifting back into the heart of this mountain. We must pursue. Can you move forward? Yes, immediately. Unless we want to know anything if we think there's anything in that ship. You said sounds of recent combat. That's us.

That would be what we just did. Isn't us? Or do we get a sense if there's combat elsewhere? Make an insight check. Okay. Guidance. Yeah?

You know she's insiding right now. Yeah. Fern's just always touching Beau for no reason. I was just like, it was just so her arms was up. Yeah, I'm just kind of progressing. She's like checking.

Guidance, guidance, guidance. Yeah? Careful, Dillie Fisher drawn by Horny. We'd be dead if that was the case. So over. 23? 23.

You gather the recent sounds of battle would be the battle that you all just had for it, loud and massive spells and explosions and fiery columns and screeches of spectral entities scattered away, destroyed before there could be any conversation or information gleaned by a conversation or a gentle defeat.

Okay, I got it, I got it. Setting them aside. any of the emergent story and or details that surrounded the destruction and haunting of this pirate crew immediately scattered and lost to the winds with the destruction of its captain. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You ascertain this was probably the battle that drew the light.

Great, thank you. Wow. Good to know. We could. A mystery lost a time. I mean, do I recognize any of the Gossamer threads as it hasn't been around the island as I've been searching? You look over and get close to it, and you see flashes, and you recall some of the plant life before it turned, kind of began to give off these little light branches, almost like roots of glowing white that seemed to emerge.

Some of the spirit friends, friends you've known for so long, those that live and guide the other living beings in this island seem to act. stranger and indeed carry these same veins of white hidden amongst their spectral forms. You see, yeah, this corruption is often considered a dark tint towards dark magic. It's odd to see glowing light the source of corruption. But as you look at this, you can see the very rock and stone of this place here in this spirit. spiritual side of the realm. This light corrodes and it spreads, and you've seen it take the minds and spiritual sanctity of your friends. Arnau.

Ar. That's absolutely right. No. Oh, no, indeed. Arna. That's absolutely right again. Say it one more time, preach it. Are?

Yeah. NAR. I don't need to tell you guys that this isn't a great place we were literally just attacked by the most monstrous things I've ever seen in my life so well you should get out more then

that was actually not that bad we've had ghost pirates kind of a thing that happened okay you don't have to talk down to my experience I'm just saying those four ghost pirates particular were the worst that I've experienced. You should go to the moon. Yeah.

What? Yeah. I should go to the moon? They start on about this. It just becomes a thing. Why have you been to the moon? Oh, it's a long story. Yeah.

I'm a god eater. Let's keep going. I go stand to the opposite part of the party. The Imogen is, she tells me. Yeah, we got to keep moving. Yeah, we're moving, we're going. We're going into the mountain. Go, go, go, go.

Who is guiding the troop in the direction? They believe they're following of the strange source of sound and light. Orum will follow the sound. And as Cad's blessing runs through the sword, Orm sees and feels it wrapping like tendrils around his entire body, Dick. I have some bad news for you. Yeah. It only lasts a minute.

Oh, and it fades away and goes, Phr- we could try that again later. And then I lean on my 35 passive perception as I... Humblebrake. Head through the mountain. Absolutely broken. Oh, wait, I'm so sorry.

It's up for an hour. It's my problem. I thought it was a minute. Never mind. No, your blessing is up, but Trucite makes what... True sight might be down, But yeah, the blessing is still up.

Full erection. Man, when you get a roll in the hay a day, it totally changes your outlook on life. Let me tell you. Falling behind Orem, deeper into this cavern upward, the kind of curling climb leads you to geode-like interior caverns of broken quartz like crystal

and various pockets of ore that carries a strange, inherent glow, an ore that doesn't exist in other physical realms. This is like a spectral material that seems to have been caused by some sort of a detonation between dimensions. And here it resonates with that strange, bassy sound, that heavy. You feel the chamber kind of vibrate. Your vision shakes whenever it goes by, and you feel in the depth of your stomach, almost like it's to churn and rise, it is an uncomfortable, sickly feeling every time it begins to get louder

and louder. And as you climb behind Orum, eventually you come to a large central cavern, a 200-foot, 150 to 200 foot across cylindrical opening in the core of this mountain, blown outward, almost a spherical detonation, then rises upward. And I would say at this moment you could see the sky if it wasn't blocked by a bright beaming star. A source of light so bright your eyes must avert. It burns into your retinas, but to take a glance.

It's like glint, like staring deeply into the center of the sun at its zenith. If only white and ominous. And that hum, that low bass, is just ever present. cutting through your senses, you almost feel your knees begin to buckle at the sense of sickliness in you, you, Ethel, you know that whatever this is when it awoke, this is what splintered this space, this is what splintered, this mountain, this is what splintered you, and you feel something a part of you that exists above as you all begin to hear the sounds of familiar voices. shouting. You hear these echoing, distant cries of battle. You hear the voice of a familiar

teethling shouting out over the fray. You hear blasts of distant arcana. You hear the unveiling of massive blade strikes and hammer blows until the sound of a divinely blessed angelic barbarian strike, brings low a loudly screaming and plummeting entity. And there you see the burning bright star diminish to about half its brightness as that distant entity falls towards you all. As your eyes begin to focus what was once a light too hard to see, there's now a snaking, breaking serpent of bright, burning crystal and rock, itself churning and flaking and burning and breaking itself as it screams and falls towards you all angrily.

You all back up as it hits the ground floor around you in the center of this mountain heart. Whatever tethered it onto the opposite side of this two-relemned space, should shattered and broken. And now only that spiritual form remains. And it is furious and desperate and about to lash out. I need you all to roll initiative. Oh! That's correct.

Okay. Who. Fuck. Oh, wow. Ready for another how you want to do this, Ashley? I know. 25 to 20. 22. 19. All right. I need you to roll the 20 for me. Who got the 19?

Caduceus. I have. Duceus. Rollies. Three. Three. All right. 20 to 15? 16. 16. 16. Whoa. Three-way rollies. Three-way rollies. Boulder parchment shears. Oh, cocked. 19. Ten. Four.

All right, Bo, Fern, and Ford. Fifteen to ten? Fifteen. All right, we have Ethel there. Ten to five. Nine. Nine. What's you got?

Me? Yep. I rolled a one. Imogen. As this This corroding light-giving spiritual cancerous entity that has been destroying and eating the center of this spiritual core of this island rives and lashes out.

Orum, you have the initiative on this. Distance? At this point, as you've all kind of backed up at its impact, about 20 feet from you. 20 feet. He ducks down low and Naruto runs straight at On the way, bonus action, Hex. Let's go!

Little vines and dark blue blooms start sprouting along its head and neck, and he just starts laying in. I forget anything, no. And the blade is still going nuts from Cads' blessing. Wild Mother, I don't know where you are, but your family is doing you proud. Myll Mother, I don't know where you are, but your family is doing you.

That is a... a 23 to hit. 23 to hit. Hits. Go ahead and roll damage. Okay. So the hit is 16 for the strike plus one for a necrotic.

So 17 plus holy weapon. 16 because it is immune to necrotic damage. Okay. Forget the hex. Damn it. So nine, what I say? 16 plus nine is 25 for the first hit. 25 damage for the first hit, all righty.

Okay, second strike, and he is just cutting away at its face, trying to stab it in the eyes. Does it have a face? Is it... It was a snake? It's a serpent-looking sort of like a crystal and rock creature. There is a face-like shape that you'd see its mouth open, angrily snap around, but it seems to break and reform at other parts of its body.

It's chaotic and its construction. Would you say it's a floral dragon? Sure. Does Radiant matter at that point? Because 2D8 of that would have been radio. Yeah, that's right. Okay. That's right.

For this, no. No. Okay. Okay, so the next is 21 to hit. 21 to hit. That does hit. Does hit. Okay.

4.15 plus the radiant 15. 7 is 22, and we'll make it a goading attack. So, that's going to be a 17? Fail. 30 points of damage. All right. It is now focused on me. That's the second attack.

All right. A third attack. I rolled a 17, so that's way high. That is 12 plus the Radiant 12 plus Fighters. 13 is 25 total. All right. Action, sir.

Oh. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Here we go. Uh, 19 to hit. Rolled a four. 19 to hit? Fails.

Next attack. Four. Fail. Dude, I rolled three fours in a row. Damn. Wow. Action surge gone in a puff of smoke. Four, nar.

Ar, nara. Our, nara. Wow. The first strikes fill you with confidence. But as you smash and destroy sections of its stone crystal face, you watch as they splinter and reform right around its tail without realizing you look over your shoulder and sweep three times, kind of caught off guard, but your blades go wide.

As the end of your turn hits, it's going to go ahead and use legendary action to do a spirit scar beam. Legendary action? What? This is a spirit scar beam? No, it hasn't moved. Because you all scattered out backward, We can only hit one of you.

It's me. It's 100% me. Yeah. Orrame, you should make a dexterity saving throw for me, please. Cool. Fuck. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. It's cool. That's a 27.

27, that's a success. All right, so you take 17 points of radiant damage. It's a deck save? Yeah. I'm shield master now. I throw the shield up, block my entire tiny body, and it's zero damage. There you go.

And you do not take its secondary effect. Secondary effect. As you block it entirely with your shield, tiny little halfling, awesome dude. All right. Finishing your turn, Orham. Tiny little halfling, awesome. Yeah, all done.

It is now the creature's turn. Oh, shit. It's second in the order. Live bright. Yeah, I wrote really good into the shit. It's going to unleash a furious Nova. Nova. Excuse me? All creatures within 30 feet of it have to make a Constitution saving throw.

Is that all of us? I need all of you, because you all moved back as it impacted. I happen to be 31 feet away from it. No. I push you forward just a little bit. I'm going to use Diamond Soul to re-roll that. I'm going to use indomitable to re-roll that. 19.

19 phase. Fuck. You take 62 points of radiant damage. Dude! Wait, Matthew, before you start killing my friends. Yeah. Is anyone within 10 feet of me? Oh.

I am. Is anyone within 10 feet of me? I am. Plus five for all protection. That's right. You guys all scattered outward when it impacted, and it's in the middle of the chamber. So I'll say, as you guys pulled outward,

each of you can have two other people in your radius. You're making us choose our favorite friends? I'll take the two on this table. Reyes. Oh, that was such an easy choice. All two on this table, huh? I might be good. I'll take Ceducis and the Ethel. That's really nice considering

I got you that pirate. I'll take Fernon and Imaging. You got it. So, yeah, so Ford you take 62 points of radiant damage and you lose two hit dice. Caduceus? With, is it a plus five? From that, that's 21.

21 succeed. So you only take 31 points of ready and damage and you lose one hit dice. 31. Beauregard? 27. 27. Same thing.

You take 31 points of radiant damage and you lose a hit dice. Ethel. There's a one pass? Oh. Ethel. Bountiful luck. Rerol.

It's actually quite lucky So re-roll that Reaction, re-roll. Come on, what's the opposite? The opposite of one is a three. Plus three, so six. Six, you take 62 points of radiant damage and you lose two hit dice.

God damn it, Tom. 21. You take 31 points of radiant damage and you lose one hit dice. After indomitable 25. 25, you take 31 points of radiant damage and lose one hit dice, Vern? 23.

23, you lose 31 points of radiant damage and you lose one hit dice. Braith? 12. Take 62 points of radiant damage. And you... Damn, I'm really one of all these. You lose two hit dice.

That's going to end the entity's turn. Damn. It does give us legendary actions back. Stop it. Caduceus. You're up first with bow on deck. Caduceus, are you within 10 feet of this creature? Say no.

I don't think so. I'll allow that. Yeah. All right. Continue with your turn. Okay. Let's see. Where was I? Guys, there is a correct answer to that question if he asks you. Say no? Yeah, it's just no. You all are great.

The first thing I'm going to do is I'm going to use my bonus action to cancel Holy Weapon. So what happens when I actually stop Holy Weapon is that the light itself flashes out in a great, brilliant burst. and so any creature within 30 feet that I choose has to make a Constitution saving throw. On a fail save, the creature takes 48 radiant damage. It's immune to rain. Oh, it's not immune to radiant. It's not vulnerable.

Okay, okay, okay. So that's going to be... That's a 16? No, it's a con-19. Okay. So, and this might not work, but that means it takes 48 radiant damage, which you get to roll, and it's blinded.

It is a name to being blind. I had a funny feeling. But, Orem, go ahead and roll 48, radiant damage. Okay, 48, 48, 48, 48, 48, 48, 48. And... 48, 48, 48, 48, 48, 48, 48, 48, 48. Okay, 17. Okay, 17 points of radiant damage.

It doesn't have as much of an impact as you think it would. Oh, dear it. All right, all right. Well, with that then, I suppose it's time for maybe a mass heel. So, watching all this happen, I'm just... I'm just, I'm going to sit. Caduceus kneels down, takes his staff, and just starts to pressure it into the ground,

cracking the ground below it as my amethyst crystal glows in time with the rest of the crystal in the room, and I cast mass heel, and we all get to split 700 hit points amongst ourselves. Whoa! Girl, where you've been keeping those hits, Hit points. I'll never tell.

I think there's no way we don't all go back to full. We all go back to full. I'll take 120. Yeah. There's. So Caduceus finishes us all. Yeah, he did. Dirty.

Orum. Disgusting, Liam. Disgusting. I'll allow it. It's been a day. Alrighty. Yeah. So all of you pretty much go to full hit point.

Yep. Sheesh. All right. That's your action. Yeah. And then I'm going to just keep my distance from this terrible crystal snake. You're staying where you are? I'm assuming I'm like probably 20 feet of, yeah.

I'm kind of trying to stay just like some distance, but also with the group. Okay. 31 feet exactly. With the group. Who are you grouping with? I want to be around. Not you. Okay, fine. Trying to keep with Ford, keep with Ethel.

and then also keep with Orum, if possible. Okay. So you move over to that kind of troop there? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And if your turn to me use legendary action and do another spirit scar beam, it's going to go towards, it's going to curve and carve past Eucidus

and Ford and Ethel. I need the three of you to make dexterity saving throws. Plus five. Thank you. Plus five. Dexterity saving throws? Yes. Natural 20!

Nice. For a 26. The 18 points of radiant damage to you for? Ow! Uh, 16. 16. You take 36 points of radiant damage, produces. I need you to mark a death-saving throw.

Cool. Oh! That lasts until your long rest. How many points of damage again? 36. 36. 15. You take 36 points of radiation.

I need you to mark a death-saving throw for me, yeah. You're playing dirty. Yeah, you can heal all you want, y'all. What have you? What have you done to him to make him do this? I don't know, a lot, a lot. Ten years of pent-up DMing. Try running high-level combat for eight people.

We've dunked on him for every mispronunciation for 10 years. Yeah, I've been keeping tabs this whole time. All right, so that finishes the end of Caduce's tone. Beauregard, you're up with Fernon deck. All right, and he's down on the ground. Yeah, he's right. Yeah, he's right on the ground, apparently. All right, I'm going to run up.

I'm going to pop out my belabor's flat, or my Blaberg and just like, bled-libber, and I'm going to spin it around, and I'm going to run in for that pop-up. Um, I think it is, uh, okay, um, nine plus 13 is most definitely 21. That hits. And then seven plus 13 is most definitely, oh, 22 even. And seven plus 13 is most definitely 20. That hits. Okay, okay, okay, okay. I think 20 is. our magic number you guys um first one let's do this first one first first I'm the realist um okay so that's going to be 13 points of damage all right stunning shike that's muted being stunned yeah of course you next one

uh that's going to be 12 points of damage already already I am going to, wait, how does this work? How does this work? Hang on, hang on. How does D&D work? How does D&D work? This is a 20-level month baby. Roll dice.

Okay, on a strikeed. I'm going to spend a key point to do flurry of blows. So here we go again. Another pop-pop. Yeah, those both hit. That's a 16 to 14, so both definitely hit. And then we're going to do the first one. That's a 10.

So that's gonna be for Unarmestrike, that's 16 points of damage. Already. And then that's good. 14 points of damage. I'm gonna spend three key points to do debilitating barrage. Let's go!

So you see, I crack it twice with my staff. Pop, pop, I throw the staff back, and I'm gonna like with just a little bit of that lingering lightning. love energy. I'm going to crack it right in its sensitive areas. What am I looking for? It's like a segmented serpent of crackling stone and furious light crystal. And as you punch into its chest, it cracks and breaks and you actually go up to the elbow inside before you release your key energy that spirals throughout its body. And for a brief moment, your spiritual energy

reconnects with its spiritual energy, and you feel and sense the fury and hate, the elemental history of something that was long ago shattered and left. Ooh, he's Anghi's. And as I do that, I'm gonna grip on, and I'm gonna just like tug just a little bit. And I'm going to make him vulnerable

to lightning damage. And I'm gonna call out to Imogen, and I'm gonna say, light him up, bitch. Yeah. That's my turn. All right. She's at the end of the order. With that.

Yeah, but let's see what happens. Bow's turn is done. Fern, you're up with Ford on deck. All right. Actually, at the end of that turn. Okay. No. It's other two legendary actions to recharge its Nova.

Continue, please. Okay. I am going to cast Moonbeam. Moonbeam. And it is a Constitution saving through of 19. 19, a natural 18. That's going to be a 28. All right, so since you failed, so it's 5D10

plus 2D10 of radio. He didn't fail. What did you say? I 28. But if you failed. But if you failed. That's important to remind them. Damn.

All right, so, wait, what do I do now? It didn't work. You go home. On the spell, does it say it takes half damage? But I always kill the thing. Okay. Okay, so it's half as much damage. Correct.

So roll the damage and tell me what to do it. All right. Hold on. Teeth. A nine. Teeth. We've got a four. 13.

Teeth. Small-sized. I know. Nineteen. What level did you cast this at? Five. Nice. 15 plus nine is.

24. 24. So reduce that to 12. And then 2D10 radiant damage on a failed save? Half as much. Or half as much. Yeah, so it takes 12 damage. It says 12 radiant damage.

And it takes half of that because it is resistant to radiant damage. So it takes six damage. Cool. The moonbeam strikes through, joins its own light as the beam burns into its crystal, angry, writhing form. It sears it a bit, but it doesn't seem as bothered. Okay, well, we know that now. Radiant doesn't work. Thanks for figuring that out, Fern.

You got it. All righty, is Mr. wanted to do anything? Yes. If he's still out, he's going to throw some shit. What's a monkey to do? All right, so he's going to take... Ooh, those are double sixes. So 12 points of fire.

Here, damage. Did you roll the attack? Mr. Autocrats on everything. I don't know why I just did that. I think I just roll a D20. That was, I forget. It's all good. No, you just have to make an attack.

That hits. That's 21. Just don't ask. 21 does hit. 12 points of fire damage. 12 points of fire damage. You got it, awesome. Woo!

While the moonbeam doesn't have the desired impact, the angry elemental fire monkey's shit gun does indeed leave a chunk of the creature angrily broken and fired. Big boy. Heck yeah. All right, finishing Ferns go. Ford, you're up with Ethelon deck.

Ford's gonna run up with the Star Razor and he's gonna take three swings with Dwethfire. The Star Razor exalted. Ha ha ha ha, natural one. Fuck you! You bitch. I probably have one now. A roll again.

Natural 19. Oh, wait. Oh, no, it's not Hex, but, that's a 33 to hit? 33 hits. Yeah. And the last one is a 17 plus 14. 31 to hit.

That hits. Amazing. Let's go. On the second one, let's do 1D10 plus 8. That's a 10 plus 8 for 18 points of slashing damage. Great. And on the last one that hits, I'm going to pump a divine smite into his ass.

Let's go. That's going to be... Tell me the divine smite damage separate. 5D8. Oh, there's only in 5. 14, 60, 34. 42 points of radiant damage. 42 points of radiant damage?

Yeah. Okay, that'll be 20. All right, got it. Got it. Cool. Massive heavy strike. Carves into a blast of light energy. Light on light.

It's a lot of light. It's very bright in here, guys. The creature like curves around, slams into the side of the mountain. Part of the mountain kind of cracks around and bits of stone and rock kind of high up boulders kind of fall and plummet. You kind of have to step out of the waves. It kind of bounces off of its body. It is almost like spiraling in and encompassing the center of this central heart chamber of the mountain.

as it gets more and more furious. Does that finish your turn for it? It does before I run away. Okay, so you back out of its range? Yes! All right, it's going to go ahead and make an attack on you with its seething strike. That's going to be 25 to hit you.

Oh, no, it hits. Can I use my reaction to searing words? Yeah. Sure, let's go for it. How do you sear it with your words? I say, snake! Fuck you! No!

Poetry! Why does this work for you? Simple but effective. Keep wrong ones, guys. I don't want to lie to you because you're such a beautiful audience and you're such beautiful people, but I'm eating shit up here. So unfortunately it does still hit, but it does do 2D10 fire days. Yeah, thanks so much.

My dungeon master is the best dungeon master. Reminds me that I can hurt the snake. 13. 13 points of fire damage. Though the words didn't prevent it from striking true, the flames still burn up its body and it angrily strikes at you with a success on that. You take 44 points of radiant damage. 44 points of radiant damage.

As it bites onto you and where you think fangs would be instead just searing blades of light pierce into your body, and you lose the hit dice. It's searing blades of light in my body. Yeah. And Star Razor bursts for 11 points of radio damage. Okay, it takes five points. Wow, there are steering lights and blades in my body. Yes, exactly.

All right, that finishes. Ford's go. Ethel, you're up with Reyes on deck. Great. I'm looking between Bo and Imogen, just like the relationship. I'm actually looking at everyone being like, I've been alone for so goddamn long.

It's so nice to see people working together and nicely. I look over to Imogen. and I remember when I set fire to her face I'm like as a bonus action I send another bardic inspiration over there and I try and say

hmm light them up me up light them light every yeah yeah yeah you can agree on it it's all good and I use my galvanising ballad and I breathe in deep and I just play the most metal shit through these two flutes

in fact what you use hear doesn't actually seem to reflect whatever I'm doing with my fingers. I feel like everyone will hear whatever it is that would make your blood boil and just like lift seven times as much in the gym that day. And everyone, and we will do that for the next 20 minutes. And everyone gets advantage on their attack rolls for the next. All of you have advantage on your attack rolls until

Ethel's next turn. Oh, wow. Fantastic. All right, finishing Ethel's go. Brayas, you're up with a midget on deck. Okay, I'm going to use that advantage to attack. Is it within striking distance? You can move up and get with the striking distance.

I will run right up to it and yell out in a mighty yop of anger. Oh! And strike it. 23 to hit. That hits. I'm going to, sorry, I should have said this before. I'm going to divine smite at first level. and I'm also gonna click my foul verdict flail

and whip poison into it causing an extra 3D8 of damage. So this is 7d8 of damage. So 15, what is that? Oh, that's the 3. 18, 19. This is not a D8. 4, that's 8, 32, 39 points of damage.

39 points of damage. How much that is radiant? Let's just say half. Oh, wait, no, it's not, because that was mostly poison. It was just 1D8 was radiant, so let's say five. Okay, got it. It's jazz, baby. All right, still the heavy hit as you splatter across it.

You see the glowing light emanating from this gets even dimmer on one section of its kind of churning rock torso as black liquid kind of oil splatter scatters across it, like Jackson Pollocking the side of what part of its face. Attack again with advantage, right? Yes indeed. Oh my God. Incredible.

Terrible. 17? 17 misses, unfortunately. As my bonus action, I still have a bonus action. I will inspire our new friend Ethel by, I can see that he's parched from the the battle, so I'll pour a little bit of water into my shoe and hold it out to him. Drink of this.

My friend? It is the water of friendship. Is this natural where you come from in your land? It seems kind of fucked up. My land is fucked up. It's on the wrong side of the earth. The flat side. No!

That character's dead. Oh, I got confused. Drink of my shoe and be inspired by my foot odor. I say, foot odor. Shoey, shooey, shooey, shooey. And I get dysentry, I imagine. I thought you had hooves.

You wear shoes? Oh, shit. Do I drink it? You know what? I took off my hoof. My hooves are detachable. Hoofee, hoofy, hoofy. I just had to unscrew it.

Roll for mad cow disease. This is so off the rails already. All right, does I finish your turn, Brayas? Moe. Imogen, you're up with Oremont deck. All right, all right. Okay. I'm still floating in the air, and I'm going to hold out my hand, and I'm going to cast Witchbolt at 8th level.

At 8th level. Oh, shit, and that keeps going every turn, right? Yeah. Is that lightning? Well, it returns to a regular D12. It's potentially more. It's 8D12. The first hit.

Doubled by Bose fucker. Yeah, but it's doubled by Bo's fucker. Indeed. And I'm rolling at advantage. I'm rolling at advantage. You are rolling at advantage because of Bethel. Let's go. Come on, come on. Yeah, baby.

That's a crit in Daggerhart. I just thought. That's okay, hold on. Okay, that would be 28. Yes, that's right, let's go, let's go. That's a successful hit. Yeah! Let's go, come on.

Okay. Let's roll that lightning damage. Okay. Okay, seven. I'm sorry, you guys. Shut up, shut up. Who is this woman? What is this? Come on.

Come on. I know, I know. It's so tough. 23. Plus three is 31. What's up there? Not your face. 36. And I got one more?

That's cocked. It was a 12, but it was cocked. Oh, 12! So whatever that was. 38? Is it 36 plus 12? 48 times 2. Come on, come on, come on.

All right, that's going to be 96. Yeah! 96 points of lightning damage. Ooh! As this switch bolt, Which bolt charges up within Beauregard with her arm like half buried in this creature and holding onto it. You watch the light flickering through. And as you remove your arm, Beauregard, it leaves this kind of gaping, broken chasm in the creature's torso that you release this bolt into.

And as it strikes it, you watch as chunks of the serpent shatter and break off into hundreds of different directions scattering around. It's now broken. You can see the stone body of it is now broken into two different sections with one long, almost lightning tether of radiant spectral light holding them. I'm going to wrap the tether around my wrist and yank and try to hold onto it. You're lassoing this entity.

I'm lassoing it. Hell yeah. And then I'm going to, as a bonus action, I'm going to quicken mind sliver and try to hit it with psychic damage as well. Let's go. All right, that's an intelligence saving throw. That is natural 17, 19. Fails.

So that's... Yeah. Man. What's going on over there, Ford? That's 16 points. I like the look. I like the Ginnu Force and Dragon Ball. That's...

16 points of psychic damage. 16 points of psychic damage. Nice. Alrighty. Does I finish your turn? Yeah. All right. Bring us to the top of the round.

Orem, you are up. Orum slides in front of Imogen and starts, slats, flashing away at the beast's head face. At advantage, here we go. That is a natural 20. Oh, oh! Silvery barks. I rolled a six on the dyes,

that's 12 plus 11, is 23. 23 for the first hit. Goating a tail, oh no, plus goading attack. Mew-mm. He's the greatest of all time. Three plus six. So whatever I just said, plus six from the superiority die. So between nine total?

And it has to be to 19. It did not. So it is goaded. So any attacks that aren't you, it has disadvantage. So I'm up in its face. Disavage against Ford last time with its reaction attack and it continues that trend. The second attack, that is an 18 plus stuff.

So that is three plus one is 14. I'll leave it at that. Last one is 14 plus 15, so 29 to hit. That is a three plus one is 14. So I'm just stabbing it in the eyes again and again and again to try to bring its ire on me, the smallest man in the world. And it seems to be working. It is furious and focused on you at the singular moment.

Okay, and I stay put. All right, that finishes your turn. That now brings us to initiative count of 20. Now that it has- Actually, are you're far back? Yeah, is-ish. But never mind. Go ahead, go ahead, go ahead. I'm at 30 feet away.

Actually, it's interesting point, Oram, you started your turn close up to it because you fought it last year. I'm right in its face. Yeah. So at the beginning of your turn, you will be within its consuming corona. Yeah. Because you started your turn within 10 feet of it, you lose a hit dice. Okay.

I like to consume coronas. My corona. All right. Now comes the layer action, now that we've been in combat for a round. Yeah. You notice at this point so many little spirits and sprites Spirits of the island have been gathering around the rock, following you behind, possibly, and watching at a distance, cheering you on.

Don't worry, they're my friends, guys. It'll be fine. That's good. And you watch as the light flickersness entity. And for a split second, you watch as those weird white spider web-like tendrils rock it out in all directions and seem to pierce and strike all the various small spiritual friends of the island. And all their eyes shift to a bright white color.

And they all descend in a cloud of corrupted furies like spirits. Everybody, please make Constitution saving throws for it. Okay. You're close to me. Plus five. Thank you. Yeah, Imogen and Fern, you're close to me plus five. You die.

All right, starting over here. 25. 25, you're fine. Ferns? Real bad. 15. 15? You're fine.

16. 16. After indomitable, so I'm all out of that. All right. 21. You succeed. 23. Succeed.

Vote regard? 17. Succeed, caduceus. 21. 24. 27! You all succeed. The gathering of them and the presence of Ethel drives these spiritual entities, corrupted as they are, to still not fully engage in the ravenous cloud of spiritual hunger they were driven to do.

So none of you mark a death save. Death save. It wasn't a terribly high D.C. But those that failed, it was bad. We all do three seconds of a dance move. That does bring us to the entity's turn, however. Since it did use two of its legendary actions, which it gains back,

it's Furious Nova recharges without having to roll for it. Goaded. Indeed. All creatures then 30 feet of it, which is all of you. I need you to make a Constitution saving through. Close five. Fuck! I mean.

Do we still take an extra five? Do we still take five? If it's a spell. Is this a spell attack or? No, this is just a match. This is just an emanating spiritual strike. So. 26.

26. You take 31 points of radiant damage and lose a hit dice. Four. Nine. Take 62 points of radiant damage and you lose four hit dice. Oh. Dirty, 20. 20, you take 31 points of radiant damage

and lose a hit dice. Imogen? 22. 22. You take 31 points of radiant damage and you lose a hit dice. Oh, damn. Ethel?

27. 27, you take 31 points of radiant damage, lose the hit dice. Bo? 23. Nice. 31 points of radiant damage, lose the hit dice. Caduceus.

25. Dang. All right, 31 points of radiant damage, lose a hit dice. 17. 17. You take 62 points of radiant, damage and Ford loses five hit dice.

Whoa. You bitch. What you doubt to, buddy? I actually don't know. Oh. Did you say five? Yes, five. You are?

Oh, boy, one more. It's all because of Ethel. It's fault? Ethel's fault that my hip points are so low. That's not my fault. Kill the Goliath. Save the team. The entity's turn.

Caduceus, you're up with Beauregard on deck. Maybe the entity wants a sacrifice. sacrifice. We could give it Ethel. I thought you were good now. Oh, you're right, you're right. I've got to keep reminding myself. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, Ethel. We're going to save him. We're saving you. Okay, just looking at some stuff really quickly.

Do I have a bonus action I can use to... Send it back to hell. It's not how I work. Why not? Because... Shit needs a doing. Steep some tea. That on the other hand, I can do. Okay, let's, uh, that's, uh, all right, that'll do a thing.

Uh, I'm gonna do it, I haven't tried this, uh, I've been, so I'm going to, uh, attempt some divine intervention. Whoa. Yes. Oh. But you said you weren't talking to the Wild Mother. Yeah, this is the first time I've tried it since, uh, y'all fucked everything up. So thank you for that.

Sorry. Caduceus, explain to me how you are attempting and what you are tending to ask of the Wild Mother. I have been afraid to ask for anything. He quietly kneels down and he holds his staff and quietly speaks to it. I have been afraid of whether or not you would answer and if you answered what it would even mean.

But right now, this needs to be done. and we need to walk out of this place, and these creatures need to be freed. If you are there, please help us free these innocent creatures caught between life and death. And if you're not there, I beseech, whatever can hear me,

whatever is here, just help. Just help. us, please. Caduceus, you've spent the entirety of your life feeling through familial practice and through prayer and through routine, piety, always felt the Wild Mother present. And in this fearful moment, you reached that familiar, warm space of consciousness. consciousness and find nothing there, but instead feel warmth elsewhere, as in that space,

you feel the rock and the stone and the vine and the moss and the trees and the ferns and all the life that she once overlooked still carrying her presence. those still scattered and echoed. You feel the island. You feel the life force that exists to the other realm, the one that you are plucked from, briefly reach beyond that veil. At the thinnest point, and the rest of you watch as the cracked stone of this cylindrical space begin to shake, as thick vines begin to pierce through and hold.

the crumbling aspects of the mountain together. You watch as impossible amounts of root and tree begin to break through and climb the inside of this chamber. Ethel, you feel a rum in your chest, an unfamiliar heartbeat that is bigger and warmer than yours as you feel your hands reach back against the walls of this chamber and roots and vines begin to wind and expand. span beyond the cracks at the tips of your fingers.

You feel some calling you haven't felt in a long time, and all of these trees and roots are connected to you in this instant. Somewhere in the mind of this quiet little cowman, something stirs within, and you watch as the island fights back. While the mother is not watching, the children still learned, and they rise in her stead. Branches fire forth. You watch as trees and leaves, not red and purple as the surrounding jungle, but green and vibrant in the physical world. Wrap and surround this entity. And it is not just restrained for

for the time being, but I'll say it loses its legendary resistance. Whoa! Oh, yeah! As it holds no sway in the central veil to the physical world, the spiritual form of this creature. Does that finish your turn? No, I have a bonus action. So, who's really?

Who's really hurting right now? Does anybody hurting H.P. style? Everyone good? I mean, I've been spanked pretty good. All right. All right. Then I'm going to heal Ford. Hold on.

Four. One. Where to go? Is it just healing word? I got a new healing word. So let's heal you for like, let's say, just a little bit. 5D4 plus five. Just put it in there.

Yeah, not bad. So, yeah, just giving for it a little heal. That's going to be five and four. Roll higher. All right, all right. I said higher. 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15. 15. 15 points of healing damage. That's what I got. Take it. Take it. All right. All right. Yep, and that's what I got right now. All right. It went okay. Yeah. Okay. Perfect. I finish your turn. Yeah, yeah, I'm out. End of your turn.

It's going to spend a legendary action to do with a seating strike. It's going to be at you, Imogen. Is it goaded by one? It is, so it has disadvantage in the strike. Oh, I see. Yes. So that's going to be 25 to hit. Oh.

Yeah, that hit. All right. So with that as its furious, like held in place, restrained disadvantage, it still gets its massive kind of light, radiant fangs out to strike at you, Imogen. you Imogen, you take 44 points of radiant damage and you lose a hit dice. Okay. Sentinel attack.

Go for it. Roll the attack. I'm real sweaty. I have advantage of us, right? You do. Okay, yeah, that hits. This is an unarmed strike, I'm pretty sure. There's my die.

Yeah. So that's going to be 14 points of damage. 14 points of damage. You got it. And it can't move, but I don't think it was going to anyway. It just can't move in the moment because it's restrained as part of the divine intervention. as well.

Yeah. It is stuck in place. All right, that finishes that go. Caduce is a new turn. Beauregard, you are up with Fern on deck. All right, and each one of these has advantage, correct? Indeed. All right, I'm going to do these one at a time.

First attack. Yeah, that's good. That's a 16 to hit. Nice. A second attack. That's a 15 to hit, so both of those definitely hit. Ah. Okay, that first one is going to be.

16 points of damage, and then the second one is going to be nine points of damage. All righty. All righty. Um, yeah, might as well. I'm going to spend a key point and do a flurry of blows. Let's go. Uh, first attack is 11 plus a bunch of shit, 20, 23, 24. Second attack. The math, 11 plus a bunch of shit equals.

Oh! Natural 20. Yes! Warm it up, baby! Warm it up! I don't... Did I roll a D12 on that single one? Did I roll a D12? Hang on.

Yeah, same thing. Okay, we're gonna keep it. Okay, and then, okay, let's do this first one. First, okay, good. That is, because these aren't unarmed strikes, so that's gonna be 14 points of damage. You got it. And then for the natural 20, come on, big,

Money, baby. I roll the three. Okay, so that's six plus six, so 12 damage. 12 points of damage from that. So good round of a flurry of bows upon that. This is a finishing turn by regard? Yep. Fern, you're up with Ford on deck.

All right. So I am going to cast Scorching Marisha Ray. At fifth level. Fifth level. Yes, so, and that's with advantage for each hit. Correct. Ooh, yeah. All right.

So I'm going to do these two. I'm going to be kind. It's going to be six rays, six attacks. Six margaris. The advantage. Five. Okay, first hit. Oh, that is 30 something or other.

That hits. Do we still have advantage on the attack? Yeah. Oh. Six turn. 16 fails, unfortunately. Oh my goodness, that's a natural 20. Let's go!

All right, that's it for it. Okay. Four more. Okay. Or three more? Yeah. 32. That's a hit.

Two more? Even better. Even better. Great. One more. Okay. One more. Okay.

One more. Great. 16 pulls 11. Yeah, because that's each one of those is 2D6. So roll 8D6, fire damage, and then we'll do 2D6 double. Okay. So. Oh, great. Okay, so that's 15, 18.

Okay. Plus, it's not as great. 18 plus... 31. Sorry, thank you so much. So, 31. And then roll two more dice. Two more dice. Okay, oh my gosh. What are they?

Okay, I'm gonna do these two. I believe you. Okay. Thanks for spending money to watch us do math. Oh, it's so lame. Man. So lame. Your support means a lot.

Four. Let's get a total. Okay. All right, 39 points of damage on that one. Nice, Fern. Does that finish your turn? That finishes my turn. You want Mr. to go ahead and fire again?

Mr.'s going to fire again. Who has advantage. Who has advantage? Awesome. Because of Ethel. What a big boy. Okay. That definitely hits.

And then two, flame of shit. Three points of Jim. Hey, it all heads up. All right. Thank you, Fern. Finishing your go. any of your turn, it's going to use into the legendary action. No.

Do a spirit scar beam. Since its placement is there, it's going to go ahead and... Hmm. It's going to go ahead and strike across the puns that were close to you forward. You said were you in Caduceus and Ethel? Sure. All right, I need you three to roll dexterity saving throws. Plus five.

To you both. Oh my God. No. Really? Natural one. No. Ford with them 30 feet of quorum? Yeah.

In the signs of this chamber, because you guys were clustered in two different parts, I'd say no. Okay. So long, Ford. Seven. Okay. Caduceus? 12.

Ethel? 33. Why? I got all those ones before, so don't want. All right. Ethel, you avoid that entirely. Two of you take 36 points of radiant damage, and you both mark a death save.

Yep. Yep. Oh, my goodness. How you're sitting, 40? That good, huh? I'm right, I'm sub-hundred. I'm sub-100. That's fine, that won't be a problem.

All right, so finishing Fern's goat, Ford, you're up with Ethelon deck. I'm gonna try and contrast the fire of Fern by sending out a cone of coal, which is 8D8 and a wisdom-saving throw of 19. That's gonna be a fail. I can't use legendary resistance. Because the, yeah, okay.

So it takes full damage. That is 46 points of cold damage. Oh, nice. I take the star razor and I just sweep it across my face and a flurry of blizzard just shoots out across. You watch as all this greenery that has grown and encased this light being now comes covered in ice, like a flash winter as icicles fall below in the light.

It's like starting to dim with each of these blasts is getting covered and diminished. As I finish your turn? It does. It does. Your turn forward there, it is that's the way. Your forward. I thought you're up with Ray is on deck.

I'm going to attempt to recharge my galvanizing ballad so I can use it again. All right, let's go ahead and roll. Yeah, six. Great. So one of the flutes kind of like starts to get a bit hot and I go, ah, and I reach in my pocket and I pull another flute out. And I quickly, I switch it over and I keep blasting on it. So everyone gets advantage for the whole next round.

Oh, thank you. Let's go. Let's go. Yes, yes, yes. All right, bonus action. Anywhere he can want to do it in your turn? Yeah, I'm going to expend my very last Bartik inspiration, and I'm going to send one over to Fjord because he is so... Yeah, I just toot a few, like, quick notes over, like, p'o, p'o, p'o!

And they just, they enrapture. Oh, by the way, Ford, because you started your turn within 10 feet away, because you struck the last turn, you do lose a hit dice because you were within its corona. Son of a bitch. It's consuming corona. All righty. Is that finished your turn? Yes.

Any of your turns can use his last legendary action. It's going to go ahead and do another spirit scar beam on your team again. What the fuck, man? There's a whole other half of the table over there. Yeah, just spread all my attacks around so nobody ever gets in danger. Actually, aren't you still goaded out of curiosity? Yeah, but it's not rolling attack roll. Oh, it's not an attack rule.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is this spell beam a melee attack? No, but ain't you all to roll dexterity saving three? It's the people who are at range. They have those same three people. It's Caduceus, Ford, and...

It's a very smart sneeze. Did you say Dex? Yes, please. Dirty 20. Damn. Dirty 20. Just saves. 25. Saves. Caduceus.

17. Caduceus, you take 36 points of radiant damage and mark another death save. So what happens when you have three death saves hit? It just means when you hit points, you instantly die. Well, fuck. Oh, position, heal thyself. 36 points of damage.

Yes. What's his health? It's not good. Not great. It's bad. What is that? What is that? 28?

Yeah. Oh, nozies. Okay, okay, okay. Ray is your turn with imaging on deck. Oh, nosies. Yeah, if you got something, I'll take it. Damn. Damn.

Oh. I mean. Can you hear you? I can. Not enough, probably. It's so hard to heal at a live show. But will you? I'm trying to be a good person.

I'm trying to be a good person. Try to be a good person. Be a good person. Be a good person. Be a good person. But I also want to do awesome stuff. My kids in the audience. Do awesome stuff.

Do awesome stuff. Do awesome stuff. Do awesome stuff. that advantage. Shooee, shooey, shooey, shooey, shooey. Now we're just chanting things, chanting things, chanting things. That's about right. Brayas, what would you like to do?

Damn, I should have done that thing. Fuck him up, Buttercup. I'm gonna fuck him up. Yeah, let's go. All right, so you got advantage on those attacks, Bras, let's go. I will, I'll take that 30 to hit. and I will use Divine Smite and I will use Foul Verdict. I'll use all of it.

It's two, three, three, three, five. Just please note to me which parts are already. I will. I will. 10, 27, and then the radiant. So 37, but 17 of it is radiant. Okay, gotcha. Okay, gotcha.

So that'll be, got you there already. But he doesn't have, he doesn't have, he's vulnerable, or is his resistance? Correct. Okay. That's your first strike. Uh-huh. And then for this one, I'll do, I'll just do blinding smite also, I guess.

Even though it's radiant damage, it'll have it, but it's more. I mean, it does all that up. Yes. Blinded by. It's right. 29 to hit. That hits. And.

24, but 20 of it is 14 points of damage, got it. All right, cool. Heavy strikes from Brayas. But he's blinded. He's immune to me. Oh. Good looking out.

But he's super blinded. He's super blinded. All right, cool. I finished his Brayas's go. He's used all his legendary actions. Oh, thank you. with Oramon deck before the next layer action. Oh, God.

No pressure. Yeah, okay. All right, well, I'm gonna do my 1D12 of tether damage. Okay, it's an action to do that. I know. Yeah, okay. So that's seven lightning damage. Seven lightning damage.

And I'm gonna quicken a spell. Okay, there it is. Look at that. Do you see that wink? That was awesome. And I'm gonna look at the spot that I have the tether in, and I'm gonna send a lightning

bolt up through it right there. What level? All I have is a level five. It's level five lighting bolts not too bad. All right, so we'll some damage. That is going to be an 18. Fails! Yes.

And I have no legendary resistances because of the, all right, let's go. Okay, so that's 10D6. Oh, that's a lot. Okay. Come up. Come on. Come on.

I'm sorry. Apology accepted. Okay. And then, 36 points of lightning damage. 36 points of lightning damage? Double. Not doubled. He's not vulnerable to it anymore.

How do you want to? No! It has 35 hit points less. I love you guys. I love you guys. I'm gonna take my tether and I'm gonna pull it like it's a rope and I'm gonna pull it like it's a rope and I'm gonna jump up and land on it, like I'm riding the Snee Snake. And as I say, y'ah, I'm going to slam the lightning bolt down into it.

As you slam the lightning bolt into it, it bursts from your palm and like carves through the stone. And as you lift your hand, it's like a massive heated plasma cutter as you're just carving through the length of its remaining body. As you do, the light begins to flicker. and fade. The stone begins to crumble until eventually pieces of it break off and tumble between the branches and leaves that hold it, and you leap off and float in the air as the final bits of its light dim as it does, and it crumbles into pieces of shale. The green of this chamber begins to blossom brighter. And for a brief moment, the ever-fogged, clouded, clouded, The sky above gives away to a bright blue sky, as you see shapes be in a descend from above.

The shadows of your lost comrades, swan diving from the top of the mountain, having more or less served the second half of this battle to you from the physical realm, and here you you you you finished it in the spiritual, destroying whatever strange entity had been haunting and corrupting this island for an untold period of time. But their shadowed forms become physical as the boundary unveiled between these realms fades. And you all now stand back on Exandria proper. They all gently land. And you can't help but immediately, excitedly gaze upon the rest of your scattered families.

But the other thing that catches your attention is the other Ethel that descends with them. Oh my God. Oh my God. I think... Hi. Hi, how's it going? I'm fine. How are you?

We don't have to do small talk. It's fine. We don't have to. I'm fine. I'm good. Did you, these are your friends, I guess. Yeah, yeah, they were really, they were great. Come over and say hello to me. Don't worry, we'll just have our moment. Are you okay? Everything. I missed you.

Oh, buddy, don't worry, don't worry. No, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, know and I'm scared. I've been... I don't think you need me. I just go and do it. I'm nothing. I'm just dragging you back, man. I'm just... I'm a dick. They don't like me. They're just hanging around me because I could help them to my friends. Hey, hey. You guys can go home, by the way. I'm... I'm going to this one. He says, hey, you're my dick. Boop. Caleb lands light as a feather Next to Orm and says

It's so weird It's almost like he's talking to himself I know it's so fucking weird I'm on how come We're gonna get another one I want another turn Everybody does Yeah.

The rest of you notice that as they're having this conversation, both of the Ethels begin to glow in their own way. A faint, gentle, greenish light seems to surround them both in proximity. And Caduceus, that vision you had earlier, that vacant space in one seems to match the opposite with a vacant space and the other. Two halves of one hole. Do you know how we... Get back? I don't know.

We're just high-fiving a bunch, but it doesn't seem to be working. I think you have to, like, enter the other way. Or maybe... Oh, maybe just hug it out. That might be the... With a penis. Hang on.

I don't know who your friend is. Yeah, don't listen to her. She's kind of fucked up. Hang on, wait, hang on. Just remember when we were young, when there was that, before he can even finish the sentence, and he pulls the flute to his lips and plays one haunting note that kind of goes high

and sits there and then comes back down, and the ethel with the lute slides a note up and hits that same note and comes down, and then between, I guess it's a trio because there's two flutes. But they start to follow each other just in the melodies and the harmonies, taking turns where the other lets lead and then seamlessly letting the other instrument take the melody and come high while the other just falls into the background and they play and accompany each other.

As the songs merge and the sound of this beautiful music begins to wind, The sounds of the island come alive. The sounds of hundreds of birds beginning to chirp with it. The sounds of the distant seaside, waves crashing. It's like a vibrance in life that's been long muted in this space returns as the two of them become one. And it's here long divided and kept. kept away from the corrupting force, the spirit of the island is reunited with itself,

as Ethel is no longer but a standing Goliath, but is now the living force that has long guarded and been the heart of this island for so many centuries, the memories come back, the time before the calamity and the time since, the guardianship, the generations of Golias that have lived amongst your trees and the jungles, the village that you helped grow and build from within yourself and for out, the children that you've watched over, the creatures, the birds, the seals, the vibrancy of this island that you have held within your heart and protected. And finally, can return to.

It's also clear now. Each and every one of you came here looking for something completely different, and yet you found one aspect of me, and put your other stuff aside and now look at all these spirits. You are heroes. As the music spreads throughout the island, the various stone forms of its Goliath denizens begin to shift once more. The protective stone state

that was placed upon them to shield them from the corrupting force no longer necessary. And as you all say your kind, hello's, and for the time being goodbyes to the joyful soul of this island to pursue the hunt, the ever-progressive hunt, for that would you seek. Take a moment. Ethel, we sure are going to miss you. I'll miss you too Hey Look at that

You can brand a spirit And I look at the tattoo That is still seemed A little faded maybe Because it was only one half of the brand But You seem to have been here for a long time There aren't many of these

But I'll Here's an egg Hang on a minute Watch out for that when she's conniving No no You just met the two of them. Turn shut the fuck up. I don't know.

You never gave me an egg. Thank you, Ethel. Well, one good deed deserves another, and I look at my two flutes, I go, and I snap off one. And I go, two is pretty stupid to look at anyway. And I hand over one of the gold sort of pan flutes. Oh, shit, I bet this does something.

Shoeh. Brayas would go over to Caduceus and put a hoof on his shoulder, and I just say, thank you so much. As I touch him, I'll pump 60 points of... I'll take it. Lay on hoofs. Technically, that means you're putting your foot on my... It's okay. I'm not going to fight it.

But that was amazing what you did, watching you pray back there. There's no gods, but... You somehow were visitors on this island. We've only been here a short time. And yet somehow you found inspiration from the people here, and from the nature that they've shared with you. And it was incredible to watch, and I think,

if I can't pray to a God, maybe this land will inspire me for the rest of my life. I... ...and Ethel? And Ethel? What will you do now? I'm the spirit of this island. of this island. I'll stay here and look over it. But I do have to say, maybe make some stupid songs that everyone can sing and share with each other. But, Brayas, I did notice, I'm pleased

that you are, you love this island and the things that it's done for you. If you'd like, you can sample something from this island as well. And how? He strums on his guitar and a blue energy comes out and seems to make this sort of like cup mug thing. Oh my God. But it doesn't look really like a mug or a cup. It seems to look...

A little like a stiletto. He says, for anyone who wishes to sip upon the sweet juice of this island. Is it... A shimmering door raises up from the sand on the island and Caleb says, hold on a moment. I have 12,000 spectral cats who would like to see this happen. Come inside and let me get my boot off.

Oh, there's stuff floating in mine. Australia, this is how much we love you. Hey, are you all ready? This is so disgusting. Ready? Ozzy, Ozzy, Ozzy? Now put those shoes back on, legends. Oh yeah, put it back on, y'all.

Oh, it's so wet. Yeah. Oh, it's damp. So with that, the adventurous tales of the island of Vivit Raina, come to a close for now. But perhaps future adventures for the hunt of lewdness and other such chaos is to come.

But thank you all so much for joining us in this wondrous evening. We love you, Melbourne. Melbourne and is it Thursday yet? We love you Australia! Insane. Round of applause for Tom Cardi! Round of applause for Tom Cardi!

I love you all so much. Have a wonderful night. Until next time, you all. And that concludes this episode of Critical Role. If you like The Adventure, please consider leaving a review on your podcast platform of choice. We love welcoming new critters, and your review could be the map that leads other kindred spirits our way. We hope you enjoy the story. Thank you very much for listening.