Critical Role - The Elder Scrolls Online: Blackwood - Part One: Death & Taxes One-Shot

Episode Date: June 7, 2021

This episode is sponsored by Bethesda and ZeniMax Online Studios. Check out The Elder Scrolls Online: Blackwood right now at http://elderscrollsonline.com/buy Game Master Matthew Mercer leads a group of restaurateurs on an adventure inspired by The Elder Scrolls Online: Blackwood! This originally aired on Monday, May 24th on http://twitch.tv/criticalrole Due to the improv nature of Critical Role and other RPG content on our channels, some themes and situations that occur in-game may be difficult for some to handle. If certain episodes or scenes become uncomfortable, we strongly suggest taking a break or skipping that particular episode. Your health and well-being is important to us and Psycom has a great list of international mental health resources, in case it’s useful: http://bit.ly/PsycomResources

Hello Critters! Welcome to our special one-shot inspired by the Elder Scrolls Online Blackwood, sponsored by our friends at Bethesda and ZeniMax Online Studios. You can check out the Elder Scrolls Online Blackwood right now at elderscrollsonline.com slash buy. Let's hop right in! Welcome to this very special Critical Role one-shot, experienced with our partnership, our friends at Bethesda and ZeniMax Online Studios for their 2021 release of The Elder Scrolls Online Blackwood. For a little context, if there's one or no ESO,

has a year-long adventure, which includes the Blackwood chapter release and also multiple DLCs that unveil the storyline as it progresses, one of which is already out now called The Flames of Ambition. Now, the storyline is part progresses, one of which is already out now called the Flames of Ambition. Now, the storyline is part of the Gates of Oblivion overall storyline. Some of you may be familiar with Oblivion

and previous Elder Scrolls games. This is part of the ESO, diving into that awesomeness of the world and lore, and it covers the scheme specifically in this of the Daedric Prince Mehrunes Dagon 800 years before the events of Elder Scrolls IV. I'm super excited about this. It comes out, Blackwood specifically,

it comes out on June 1st for PC, Mac, and Stadia, and June 8th for Xbox One, Xbox Series X and S, PS4 and PS5, across the board. And you can check out everything right now at www.ElderScrollsOnline.com/. Bye! Super excited they approached us to do this. Partially because I've been playing

Elder Scrolls for forever. I've played through all the main games. Part of the reason that me and Marisha named our bird Dagon was after Mehrunes Dagon. Aw. Really? I didn't know that. Yeah, it was a combination of Mehrunes Dagon was after Mehrunes Dagon. Really? I didn't know that. Yeah, it was a combination of Mehrunes Dagon and the classic Mesopotamian deity

slash cosmic horror sea god. So a lot of reasons to go with Dagon at that point. But Mehrunes Dagon, we had just finished playing through Skyrim at the time. That's actually why we named Ronan Mehrunes Willingham. So that's so weird that we have that on there. For a brief second, I was like, Oh my god.

Yeah, anyway, been a longtime fan of the series and super excited that we get to play some of this chaos into their world. Apologies in advance, Bethesda, for ruining it. But before we begin, I want to go ahead and do a quick round of our amazing players at the table. I want to go ahead and introduce ourselves, starting on this side.

Sam. My character or myself? Hi, I'm Sam Riegel. Yourself and your character. Oh, I'm Sam Riegel, and I am playing the character of Slaughter Grimm. Slaughter Grimm, the necromancer. What do you need? Argonian. Argonian.

No, but what else should I say? That's fine. The rest of it, we'll find in the story. Okay, my name's, yep. Out of the gate. Taliesin. Hi, my name is Taliesin Jaffe, and for this fun little romp,

I'll be playing Mallory Claxton, and he's a Dunmer sorcerer, so that's where we're going. Wonderful. Aabria! Hi! I'm Aabria Iyengar, and I'm playing Tevima, your Redguard Templar. Yes. Yeah.

Those words all meant things to me. Zora. Hi, I'm Laura Bailey, and today I'm going to be playing an orc named Grelnok Nightbringer. Nailed it. Thank you. Michelle! Hi, I'm Michelle Wynn Bradley,

and today I'm playing Hwassen, and I am an Altmer Warden. I almost said Altmer Hostess. That's my job. She's not actually joking. Well, there we go. Thank you all so much for joining us for this. Super excited to have you.

And with that, I think let's go ahead and jump into the narrative chaos that will ensue for our Elder Scrolls one-shot here tonight. Let's do this. Yeah! One shot here tonight. Let's do this. Yeah. So, we begin within the sprawling realm of Tamriel So, we begin within the sprawling realm of Tamriel during the historical period known as the Interregnum.

Oh? No emperor sits on the Ruby Throne at this moment, while war and chaos between political factions ravages the land and divides the people. Rumors continuously spread of dark arcana and clandestine threats growing in shadowed places. But here, within the safety of the Aldmeri Dominion, such matters rarely interest the more common folk,

like you, who seek to just make a living right now. Now crossing each other's paths, as you may have as young sellswords, curious wanderers, or even just happenstance allies, you forged a friendship, or at least a convenient business partnership, strong enough between you all to match this collective interest in living the less dangerous life,

and in pulling your gold saved through whatever work you may have done, bloody or not, to purchase a ramshackle hillside inn on the outskirts of Grotwood called the Dreary Jug. That was the name when you purchased it. You're welcome to decide if that's what you want to keep. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. The renovations have been slow

for the past few months. Since you've acquired this location, the clientele has been a bit sparse, but it's beginning to swell a bit. As tensions rise beyond these lands, you begin to see more soldiers passing through, and with them, more coin. So the prospects are growing steadily brighter.

A handful of Bosmer soldiers of the Dominion military are deep in their late night rounds at a far table, as one of them suddenly raises a hand towards the nearby waiter shouting, Hey, Lizard, another round of four-eyed grog and a bit of old pork platter for me and my mates, if you don't mind. I'm sorry, sir.

Say that one more time. I just need to get the order right. Yeah, another round of four-eyed grog, four-eyed grog. Yeah, I'm just going to get two rounds for the whole table. Four-eyed grog, yep. Yeah, and a big old pork platter. Pork platter? Pork platter.

Anything special? Do you need extra napkins or anything? I'll just be right back. Grelnok? Oh, wait. Grelnok, we need two four-eyed grogs over at the big meaty table over there. And, oh, Mallory! Mallory! Yeah?

Can I come back there? No! All right. Mallory, we need the pork platter. Pork's still smoking, it's in back. Well, what do I say, no? Fine, give me one minute. All right.

Ugh! All right. Thank you. Order up. That was fat. I just had to pour it. I guess so, that's how it works. Yeah. I'm sorry, yes, okay. You've been here a couple months,

you should learn this. I just, I get so nervous. Kiss the fucking drinks and go. Great. Slytherin! What? Here's a plate. Apologize to them, it's terrible because they ordered it too early. All right, I will. You should know better. I get so nervous. Kiss the fucking drinks and go. Great. Slytherin! What? Here's a plate. Apologize to them, it's terrible

because they ordered it too early. All right, I will try to hold all this stuff. And, uh. You scoot your way through the dark interior of the tavern. The smell itself, a combination of partially cooked foods, well-cooked foods, and prematurely cooked foods in this particular instance. Splatters of long dried and semi-cleaned bits of liquor

and wine across the stained wooden floor. Over towards the front, where the open doors are currently ajar to reveal the freshly night sky amongst the trees of the nearby wooded area, you can see, leaning against the table, or you can see leaning against the doorway, the b wooded area. You can see, leaning against the table, or leaning against the doorway, the bouncer, Tevima. I am just looking out into the street,

and the moment I make eye contact with anyone, you! Come get some food and a drink. You see, as you glance out there, and you are on the outskirts of this area of Grotwood. Specifically, this tavern definitely corners this area, which is mostly just heavy wood and the path where a lot of soldier footfall

and occasional horse traffic comes through. There is one, looks like a farmer who has a satchel on his back and he's just wearing a simple leather cap, kind of looks over. Oh. No. Okay.

I'm going to don't. Oh. Now. Okay. I don't. I run forward. No, no, Tavima, we talked about this. Don't yell like the shouting. Use your inside voice. I know you're partly outside. I'm outside. Yeah, but you shouldn't. So, young, beautiful, handsome wanderer,

please come hither. We have warm fires and lovely cold drinks and... We got grog! Liquors. Make an intimidation check, make a persuasion check. Ooh! Oh, it was on a 20 and then it rolled to an eight. Oh.

11. 14. Okay, I think I'll take my chances. Come on. Do you have a place I can put this down? Here, I'll take it. And I try to lift him and he's like, Oh! Yep, come on.

Releases it and quickly shuffles his way into the... It's not bustling, per se, but at this point in the evening, there's three tables that seem to have some folk who have wandered in. You expect it to get a little rowdier as the night progresses, but you've found yourselves a comfortable space

settling into the various aspects of the business as you progress. You go over to the table of Bosmer soldiers. Here's your plate of food, folks, and here's a couple of grogs. Best in town, I think you'll find. Freshly poured. Also, and I put my hand on his shoulder.

Is it a he, a she? The one who's talking to you. I've read that if you have a personal touch with the person that you're waiting, you're more likely to get better tips. So it's nice to meet you. Hi, I'm Slaughter. I'm the waiter here.

I've been working here for a little while and gee whiz, it's really great. I'm getting to meet all sorts of people here. Go away. Well, if you need anything, just, there's a little bell that I put on the table. Pork's underdone. I don't, do you want me to tell the chef?

We'll make do. Good. I don't like the chef, but yes, thank you so much, sir. I'll just put my hand on you one more time and I'm off. Laura! Hi. Yes, what's up? You're a shit waiter. Well, I'm trying to do better.

Just don't try. Why? I have to. This is my dream. I don't know if I've told you this before, because we don't talk a lot. I come from a long line of necromantic torturers. My father was named Massacre Grimm. My mother is Felony Grimm Leibowitz.

My mother is, I mean, my brother is Homicide Grimm and my sister is Agony Grimm, and we've all been longtime family of torturers. We've worked for despots and tyrants and, you know, mainly my mom and dad are freelancers now, semi-retired, but they expected- Pass the shot over to him. Thank you so much. That's very strong. They wanted me to go into the family business, of course, but I just can't with the torturing. It's just too much, you know?

It's icky and you get splatter on yourself and the screams of anguish and agony. I just can't, I can't do it. So I'd like to be in the service industry and I'm making a go of it. And I think that what we've got here is really something special, you know? Yeah, yeah. I think this is a really good setup we have.

How can I be better? Stop talking. Just don't talk. Don't scare away the customers. Actually, I found, I just butt into your conversation. I move, I like, kick over another customer. Actually, I found that more talking and lots and lots of direct eye contact is exactly what people want. They say no, but their eyes, they say yes to me anyway. So when someone comes

in and they say things like, oh, go away, what they really mean is I'm hurting inside and I just want someone to talk to. See, this is great advice. Hwa, I did the thing that you told me earlier about touching them. Yes, no, you can touch their insides. Don't touch their insides. No, I meant. Don't. I'm behind Hwa right now,

just making dagger eye contact with the table. Hwa, Hwa. All right, I'll keep a lid on it. I'll keep a lid on it. I'll keep a lid on it. I'm going to come running out of the kitchen. Drink, drink. Davina, watch that table over there. They ordered the pork at this hour.

I don't trust anybody who does that. Mm-hmm. I'm on it. Davina just sits down on one of the other tables. Just watches. Yeah. You hear some footfalls approaching. Two different sets, an odd cadence.

You look and see on one side, there is an Altmer, or High Elf, in fine Cerulean clothing, a light brown hair, who looks to be a bit powdered in the face, much more done up than the normal folk that wandered through this side, but has a certain, I don't know,

a lifted back to him as he steps in your direction. A little bit behind, you see another figure who's currently hitching a horse over by the small side stables. back to him as he steps in your direction. A little bit behind, you see another figure who's currently hitching a horse over by the small side stables. This grungy-looking, leather, cloak-clad female with dirty red hair that saunders up with a little bit of bag.

As the alt-mor approaches, Ah, is this a place to come for a drink, perhaps, and a place to rest? Oh, yes, yes, yes. You're for a drink, perhaps, and a place to rest? Oh, yes, yes, yes. Okay, okay, yes, I'm knocking over chairs as I run to the front door. I am. Hello, hello. Ah, yes, fellow Altamira, thank you.

Welcome to our fine establishment. Where are you coming from today? What is your name? What's your name over there? Well, what have you had to eat today? Would you like to eat something different today? Well, how tall are you exactly? Let's begin with a table, perchance,

and maybe a spot of reddish wine, if you don't mind? Reddish wine, or do you want red wine? Because we do have reddish wine, but I don't know if it was technically the right. We got blood in the white. It's not quite the same, but. I'll go with what you recommend. Yes, we have wine of colors, great.

I usher them over to our finest table in front of the fireplace. Okay. He sits down. The other individual that came from the horse is sauntered up to the side of the doorway as you're helping him get to his seat. Ends up coming up right to your area. She rubs her chin a bit.

And then she grabs a seat. Mm. All right. Sits in and picks a little side area, almost like an independent booth. And as opposed to ordering any food, pulls out a bag and just starts removing bits of, looks almost like roadside jerky.

Just starts chewing it at the table. Aw. I'll just wander over to Vima. I've forgotten, are we allowing clients to bring in their own food from outside? Thank you. I don't think Mallory would like that very much. You can tell her not to.

I'm staring deadlocked. I can tell her, I'm just at my job. Yeah, if she gets rowdy, I'll bounce her out, but she seems fine. Okay. Offer her the plowman special. What is that? Sausage, sausage roll,

fresh potatoes, some cheese, piece of bread. It's very nice. It's simple, it's rugged. Every dish you describe sounds like a threat. All right, all right. Hello, welcome to the Dreary Jug. I'm Slaughter.

I make super-duper eye contact with her. I'll be your waiter tonight. We have a special. Can I tell you about it? I just have a nail, thanks. It's called the Plowman's Special. It's got sausage, potato, cheese, and bread. Can I interest you in that?

I'm good, if I could just get an ale, please. Did you say a nail? An ale, please. Oh, that would have been, yeah. Her eyes wander. As you're talking, you see she's looking around. She's checking the place out, eating some jerky. First time in here?

First time. Ale, please. Sure, sure. G! We need an ale! Is that okay? That's fine. Don't call me G. Okay. Yeah, I thought I'd try it to get some witty banter or rapport going.

Didn't work. Call you G? Yeah. Whatever you work. It's fine with me. Yeah, whatever you want. What? All right, I go over and grab the ale, come back. Here's your ale. What brings you to this neck of the woods today? Passing through.

On your way to? Sounds interesting. Personal business. Yeah, very interesting. You're a real curious type, aren't you? Do I see any weapons on this person? Make a perception check. Yeah. I'd also like to add that from behind, I'm going,

Ory. Touch. Touch. And sign. No, I think at this point, I'm going to come around and just body-hwa and like, Okay. Just drop her off in front of the elves

where she belongs. The other gentleman is sitting there, like he's taking his cloak off and set it over the chair and is just gently awaiting his wine's arrival as he looks around the establishment. I'll go to the back and get some wine. Are the tables the same table? There's multiple tables in it.

So the fancy gentleman's at one table, the surly person is at another? Another table, it's like a booth side element and there's the soldier table near the floor. Soldier table, got it. It's a busy night tonight. I'm like, I could use some help on the floor. Three tables. I'm not even out there.

I'm searching for fucking wine. Goddamn it! So, Laura, you want me to get this one? Could you? I'm going to walk over to the fancy. Oh god. Fancy person. Is in process of going like, Could you? I'm going to walk over to the fancy. Oh god. Fancy person. He's in the process of going like,

so what can you tell me about this place? What's it called? It's called the Dinger, the Jug of the Dirty Drinking Hole. What's the name of this place again? The Dirty Hole. That's right. The Dirty Hole. The Dreary Jug.

The Dreary Jug. Yes, it's the Dreary Jug. I'd forgotten. Well, I recommend perhaps maybe workshopping that a bit, seeing as it's a bit challenging to remember and or present. But anyway. Wow, do you work in marketing? More or less, you could say.

Tell me more. Well, um. Where did you grow up? Where did you learn how to do marketing? What does marketing really mean? You're new at management here, aren't you? Aren't we all new beings on this beautiful planet that we call?

Hmm. Near, near. Mm. You, I mean, I think that every place is new and exciting and it's great to learn about every single thing that you may set your eyes upon. You just hear a loud crash of glass in the background as I break the bottle over the bar to open it up. At this point, as you're helping approach this point and you're coming over to get the wine for this gentleman,

the woman in the leather goes, the surly one puts the pouch away, downs the drink, and just exits. Muscles pass to you, done to go out into the night. Hold on, did she pay? If you go look at the table? I'll go look at the table. There's a handful of gold on the table, it's paid. It's paid. she do it? Did you pay? If you go look at the table? I'll go look at the table. There's a handful of gold on the table.

It's paid. It's paid. We did it. Was she a good tipper? There was no tip. There was no tip! I put hands on her. I'm not allowed to wear a sword anymore, so do you want me to punch her in the back of the head? Like, what are we doing?

I don't know. What do you do in this situation? You're the muscle? Did you do are we doing? I don't know. What do you do in this situation? You're the muscle? Did you do a? I did an excellent job. All right, I'm going to follow her out. You need to fucking tip! Okay. You guys are all on our release.

I work for tips over here, okay? That's a valid point. It's a rough service, food service. I've been there. As you step out and shout that into what is now the early evening air, the little bit of torchlight flickering in the front porch area off the side of your face, you can just catch her stepping onto the road

and turns around, reaches into the pouch, takes a couple of coins, and just throws them onto the ground and keeps walking. Cool, I'm not worried about that. There you go. Hey. I like to rip them off of my weird, ruffly outfit that I hate so much. Cool. Here's Dirk. It's ground money.

Good job. Thank you so much. I appreciate it. And thanks for the support. I know that I'm not the... This is a lot for me. You can just move on. Thank you. Just thank you. Okay, thank you. Wine.

I'm going to take it over. There might be glass bits. Oh god. Thanks kindly. We have a sandwich platter. It's got cheese, pickle sandwich, cucumber sandwich, curried chicken. I bake the bread myself.

I'm hungry, though. Amazing, and it complements the wine perfectly. There may be blood in the bread. Oh, dear. It's real. Perhaps just a spot of the cheese platter, if you don't mind. Is it a whole one platter?

It's a sandwich platter. I can give you cheese and pickle the cheese platter, if you don't mind. Is it a whole one platter? It's a sandwich platter. I can give you cheese and pickle and bread platter. It'll be deconstructed, but that's the plowman's special. Just bring me the whole thing. No. Why? I go into the back. It's part of my favorite character you've ever played.

I can make you a surfing turf. He leans his attention back to you. Well, I guess best to say is I am an appreciator of the entrepreneurial spirit. Business has been steadily growing, you would say? Yes, today we've had three to, we have two tables and that's amazing for us, I think. We're doing quite well.

We're probably, we're definitely going to make it. Wonderful, wonderful. And what else brings you to this, our humble little town? Well, my name is Diven. Takes a sip of his wine. I'm an... Just be careful, there's a little...

Never mind. A bit granular. It's a bit of a grain. Oh, it's a specialty of the vineyards nearby. I'm curious. Notes of iron. Well, I'm an Aldmeri representative out of Eldenroot.

I assume you've all been rather forthright in your taxes to the Dominion in these trying times? Yeah, yes. Slaughter does all the math. Well, I'll be curious to see your ledgers, please. It was a threat. Wait, what? It's a taxman.

Ledgers? Yes, please, if you don't mind. Just keep everything forward and upright. These are time to be showing support for the Dominion that is keeping you safe. I'll be right back. I'm going to go to the back and I'm going to find some papers

and I'm going to write some numbers and some lines on it. Okay, while you're doing that, anyone else doing anything? I mean, do you have paper? Like, can you prove who you are? Well, of course I can. He reaches into his little breast pocket

and pulls out this really nice scroll that somehow he's kept immaculate while pressed within his breast and unfurls it and shows it to you. And indeed, it is Devin LaSang, the Aldmeri tax collecting individual. It is a very unique, lengthy title, but it seems, as far as your experience

with formalized Dominion paperwork, to be forthright. Cool. Well, we'll get those. I'm going to... No. It just walks away. Bring it back out. There we go. You'll see there on line five, it says,

that says taxes. Go ahead and just roll a general... You can choose dexterity or intelligence check. What do I got here? What are we looking at? Ooh, yeah, we're solid on both these numbers. Don't know who rolled for me, but woof! Bye!

Oh, I wish it would've gone off the table because it landed on a two! All right, so. Well, you know, plus one. There you go, so three. So three. So. So three. So three.

So that was just for the assemblance of the papers you made in the back, which are... You know when a child makes a really cute drawing and the parents put it on the fridge? Yeah, here they do. If they made a ledger that they saw their dad do on tax day, so it's kind of in a similar realm. I would like you to also make a deception check for me.

Oh, great. Got it. Natural twin, believe me. Natural mom. Three! Plus one! So that's a four. It's a four? Ooh!

Ahem. I... really don't want to make a scene here, but are you to tell me that you've just presented to an official of the Dominion fraudulent documentation of your income for a new business such as this? Well, I wouldn't.

Those papers were just here when we moved in. I just thought that that's what. This is a new business, sir. We've just started out, and as you know, many establishments like ours fail within the first six months. So we're still getting on our feet. Haven't worked out the books correctly yet,

but over here is on it. Oh, I was supposed to, I thought you were to. We have a plan. We have a plan. And we just haven't enacted it yet, but we're working on it. What is the deadline for payment? This establishment is a number of months behind, I believe, from the previous owner.

Oh no. Well, that's why. But as per tax code 13AA, within the Dominion itself, new proprietors are to carry over any existing debts from previous proprietors. That doesn't feel good or fair. I walk over with the sandwiches and put them down.

I'll be taking the tips on this one. What are we all doing here? There's a bit of a paperwork. We owe taxes. We owe some taxes. How much do we owe? I could tell you if you gave me a proper ledger. Well, if you don't know how much we owe, then why?

Yeah, well, hmm. Then perhaps you would need somebody to look these up for you, and that is quite a bit pricey. I'll go find a ledger. You've lost the point lost the chicken curry sandwiches, and I just take the chicken curry sandwiches. I want that chicken curry sandwich, thank you. I grab one for my little cork. We're going to look through all the boxes

that have been covered and stuff, try to find a ledger. Yeah. Make an investigation check. I'll help. Okay. Oh, well. Yeah, I'm back in there. Oh, you've already got it. Help it, yeah. Okay. And just the whole time, I'm not really helping you look as much as I'm like,

are we going to just kill this guy? This is definitely going to be a good one. Are we just going to? We're just going to? We're going to? Yeah. Yeah, okay. I just wanted to be on the same page. Oh, oh. Hmm?

Okay. Investigation? Yes. Wow. No, 16. Hey. 16. There you go. Teamwork. Looking around, you find scraps of

some notation of shipments that were brought in. Like, you've kept a few pieces of paperwork of receiving drinks and food materials and just generally in and out going income, but you're also very new to this as a collective and you've not kept the best notation. So you're a little bit of a loss. Like, it's a little frustrating

and a learning-as-you-go unfortunate circumstance. Bring out all the papers that I can find and hand it over to the guy. As you're back there searching and figuring this out, both of you, he begins to stand up and walk about the establishment as the soldiers finish up their meal and rowdily leave. And one of them begins to complain, like,

Oh man, I'm feeling a little weird. And they make their way out into the night. He begins looking around. Well, this is quite a collection of wines here on this rack. Oh yes, that one's red. That one is a lighter red. That one is sort of a lighter red. That one is white.

It looks clear to me though. So I don't know if that's called, maybe it's called a clear wine, but that's a special thing. He puts it within a bag. Oh. Oh, actually, we, sorry, but we actually need that to sell and make money

so that we can pay our taxes. Oh, of course, of course, I understand. You should probably order some. And begins to slowly walk around, We need that to sell and make money so that we can pay our taxes? Oh, of course, of course, I understand. You should probably order some. Oh. And begins to slowly walk around over towards the edge of the bar and glancing about. Some fine silverware is here as well.

Oh, it's actually some silverware we found when we got here and it was quite dirty and we just cleaned it, but it's probably not worth anything. It looks like it's probably like trash silverware, really. I wouldn't even call it silver, silverware, more like metal prongs. Yes? Hands off the goods.

Hand over your taxes. I'm going to walk over. There's a sample of our smoked pork on the house. Walk away. is. I'm going to walk over. There's a sample of our smoked pork on the house. I walk away. Takes a bit of it. I wouldn't eat the pork at this time of day. Just let it happen. I'm sorry, sorry. Let it happen. Okay.

Go ahead. We have a smoker in the back. Make a deception check. Me? Yes. 18. Go ahead. We have a smoker in the back. Make a deception check. Me? Yes. 18. He goes, he goes, Hmm. We found papers.

Look at the papers and... Begins to thumb through them a bit, kind of dancing up, giving each of you eye contact as he does so. These are rather incomplete. It would be a shame to have to return empty-handed. I want to do something. You're an elf. Talk to the elf.

Make an elf deal. Not all elves know each other. Okay, so what are we talking about? How much? We're like immortal. I feel like they know each other. How much money what are we talking about? How much? We're like immortal. I feel like they know each other. How much money are we talking here to appease our absence of some papers? Well, I mean, to alleviate an intrusive inspection

of the entire operation here at the, is it the dingy Hole, you called it? I'm going to write that on the chalkboard. It may be something that's a good suggestion. I don't like that. Yes, that is the current name. Perhaps a deferment fee of about 300 gold. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Do we, what's our, do we have that much? Mm-mm-mm. I don't think, I think we have maybe five gold. But we need that money to pay for tomorrow. How about a bunch of bird's nests? I can ask some of my friends to bring them in and you can use them to decorate your front lawn. I can get you about 20 bird's nests by tomorrow morning.

This grows tiresome. I've been sent here to do a collection. Now, either I'm going to collect or I'm going to have to return here with more men. I'm giving the opportunity to keep business flowing as it always has flown. Now, we're doing this the easy way or the hard way? What do you want?

We ain't got your money. How much would it take for you to flow? As I said, 300 gold. How, what if we got it for you tomorrow? Well, I'd already be on the road back. Hmm. All right. I mean, how many men do you got?

Because, I don't know, we should just explore all of our options. Yeah, right? Is that a threat? It is. Yeah. It is. Are you? I'm the bouncer.

Can you tell? Look. Yeah, she's really scary. Very scary. Working it. I can tell. Have the soldiers already left? The soldiers have left. It's pretty much, at this hour,

it's just you and the tax collector. Yeah. Oh boy. Well, here's the thing. The way I see it is in this very empty tavern, there's five of us and the one of you right now. So I would like to have a conversation about a deferment plan, because I don't know if you're necessarily

going to be able to get to your soldier friends to come back and continue this conversation. So we should just have it now. Make an intimidation check. No. 13? 13's not bad, not bad. You see him get a little rustled and he's like,

Look, I... Business is just going as it's always been. Do not hold it against me. I'll come back tomorrow. Good man. You should stop eating the pork. He touches his stomach a little bit. Well, good evening then.

And he struts his way out and the establishment is gone in the night. I hate him. Not a- I didn't get in a fight! That's great, but not a victory. No? I still owe this gentleman 300 gold, and you can bet that he'll come back with reinforcements of some sort.

You hear. What's that? Are we still open? Go get it! Okay, okay, okay. I open the door. Outside, you see him currently nailing what looks like a piece of paper on the front of the tavern,

which says, this property is no longer in business for the time being by order and decree of the Eldarity Minion. Rude. I grab a piece of chalk from under my cape and I just write, but we'll be back just as soon as we can. Ooh, silver lining.

And I add it to the board for names. The silver lining? Yeah. That's really good. Make a perception check. Oop-kee. I still like dingy holes. I like dingy holes. I have 20. Natural 20. Yeah!

For a total of? Was it investigation, you said? Mm-hmm. 22. All right, so as he begins to trounce off and get onto his horse and begins to make his way off, as you write the chalk bit, out there alone, listening in the night, the crickets in the night,

the occasional owl sound. And the occasional Marr! Feral wildlife, goats that also ate the pork, apparently. You hear this strange heavy impacts and rustling. With a natural 20, it seems to be coming loosely from behind the tavern

and in and kind of to the right side of the structure. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. I kind of come back into the tavern. Um, everyone, I think there's a large creature, perhaps behind the tavern. Should we go investigate? I reach behind the bar and grab my battleaxe off the... Ooh, it's our time.

Get the stick. I've got my notebook in case anyone orders anything. I reach above. How do you know it's a creature? It sounds, you know, it might be a big cow that escaped, but I think it's something, it's something very large and heavy. So it's either a cow or something more dangerous. I just, I can go. Whatever it is,

I want to get violent right now. Thank you. And I'm going to go run into the back and go grab all my stuff, like, yeah! Shield and sword. Just remember, though, if our establishment gets a reputation for being deadly or whatever, our people might not come.

I think if we put sawdust down, and it would be an expectation, and then it would be a destination thing. Oh, I love sawdust. It'll be dangerous at the dingy hole? Right? Or what are we calling this place? The silver? Dingy hole.

But silver lining's real nice. Yeah. To the list. I feel like silver lining creates too many expectations. I like the jug part of the Drury Jug, honestly. So I was thinking either Rum Tum Jugger or Jugs the way we are. Oh, I like Jugs the way we are,

because it implies that the way we are is perfect and like Jugs themselves are a vessel waiting to be filled with experiences. And blood and a little glass sometimes. But we can come back to it. What goes on the board? I put it on the board. Okay, okay, okay. All righty.

As you all gather your things, Mallory, frustrated to see that the sandwich platter that you prepared has been largely untouched by the individual that left. Grabbing a couple more. Yeah, I grabbed some pickles and ate it off the plate. This is really good. Yeah. I grab some pickles and eat it off the plate. This is really good. Yeah. I'm very proud.

This is the, I was very excited about adding this to the menu and working on it. Just eating the sandwich with the battle eggs. Yep. Just chewing it together. As you all begin to step outside of the tavern, immediately you see there's one weary traveler who had just pulled up on his horse,

goes like, Oh, I'm sorry, you closed. Duh! Little bit. Do you want to pick up a bowl? Welcome back. And he rides off. Okay. And about that point, you guys can begin to hear the same .

It's a heavy impact and a dull, almost breaking sound. But it's repetitive. Should we all go together or split up and go around the... I feel like just marching straight to it. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, let's stay together. It's a little spooky. Can I try to recognize it? Like what the sound is?

Sure, make a perception check. Different die. Oh my god. Works. Nine. Nine. You've heard the sound of splitting wood before. Kind of sounds like that, maybe? Like someone's chopping wood, making firewood? Maybe?

Wood splitting? Someone chopping down a tree at night? Doesn't sound that scary, though. Yeah. You still trailing on that with your keen Aldmer ears. It's over in the direction of the meat curing shed. Is that shed ours or? It is your shed. Is that shed ours or? It is yours. Okay.

It is part of the establishment at Kinga. So Mallory was just out there. Correct. All right, well, let's go. Someone's in the meat curing shed? Something in the meat curing shed. Oh yes, we wouldn't want anyone to disturb Mallory's artwork in there.

Do you want to go first or do you want me to go first? Oh my god, thank you. You get the next one. Cool. I don't want to go up and like, yeah, I'm just going to shield up and then go and open the door. Okay. As you approach, and you go for the keys on your side,

because as you know, for an establishment where the food is your business and you're not keeping somebody on watch, because that'd be ridiculous for the small clientele you have, the shed is kept chained and has a lock on it. You approach, you can see the chains are just on the ground and the lock is broken. Someone's stealing on me?

Door is slightly ajar. And you can now hear louder. It is definitely the sound of something impacting and splitting wood. Mallory, just a quick check. Any chance you were just very sloppy the last time you came out here? Yes.

Respect. All right. As part of this conversation, I'd like you both to make stealth checks, please, because you're having this careful conversation in fair proximity to the source of this noise. Four. Oh, wow. Mallory! 20. Oh, wow. Mallory!

20. Oh no! Yes. So four and 20. At that restaurant, carry on. Sorry. The sound stops. On the count of three, we open it.

Mm-hmm. One. Two.. One, two. I open on two. Okay. Maybe it hurt, I don't know. You open the shed, and it's a sizable shed for a lot of the storage that's done in here. You see the hanging hams and hemlocks

and various other pieces of curing and salted meats. And some of them have been placed off to the side. Towards the back, hiding up against the wall, you see a shadowy figure currently clutching to their chest what looks to be your pickaxe, which you keep in the nearby tool shed. And the back wood of the back end of the inside of the shed is currently partially broken

and busted through. The minute you take in this scene, the figure notices you making eye contact and goes, stupid sweat, and drops the pickaxe and immediately goes for something beneath the cloak. I need you all to roll initiative. Yay! What's happening? This is so hard

to run a business. Why all the terrible rolls today? Oh my god. Woof. So 25 to 20. 20 to 15. 15 to 10. 11. Oh, 11.

Oh, good job! 10. Okay. Who has the higher dex of the two of you? Plus one. Or 12. 12 also. You guys get to pick who goes first? You can go first. Thanks. I'll support.

All right. So Vima, then Hwaa. Killing it. Killing it. Then Slaughter. All righty. 10 to five. Eight. Four.

All right, Mallory and Greln. So as soon as this door opens, the figure shouts that curse into their breath and leaps out towards you with a little bit of moonlight coming through. You just see a hood and cloak and a flash of dirty red hair. As the figure darts towards you,

and then suddenly is gone. What's your armor class? What's your armor class? 16. 16? You feel something impact the back of your armor and try and slip through the plates, and you spin around and feel it scrape off to the side as the individual seems to have vanished from sight

and appeared behind you mysteriously. The rest of you who are getting ready for this, you see this of darkened smoke and the cloaked figure that was previously in your establishment appears and is attempting to stab Tavima in the back. However, you pull back and knock the blade out of the way, at which point the figure turns and looks

and sees all the rest of you right there and says, No, she's right! And that's going to go ahead and finish her turn. This was the Sir Lee woman? Correct. Yeah. Ah! Yep. She did tip. Should've given her some pork. She did tip.

She's fine by me. I say we would. Maybe we shouldn't have made her tip. All right, and actually, no, as part of her bonus action, it's going to go ahead and it's going to mark you. Me? What? Yeah.

But. It's because you're so annoying. Yep. Finishing their turn. I'm courteous. That's going to bring us to Tavima. You're up. I see her mark slaughter and I go, okay, same.

And I would like to use Sunfire. Oh shit, okay. And they cast Sunfire. So I'm going. Yeah, I'm going to cast Sunfire. So I'm going to spend two magicka to blast an enemy with, wait, no, hold on. No, sorry. I want to use Backlash. Backlash, got it. Yeah. So yeah, an expanding Beam of Sunlight to doom an enemy.

She has to make a DC 15 con save. You've got it. That is going to be a fail with a 14. Yes, okay, okay. Then, Hua, you're on deck. Nice. Four points of fire damage, and they're doomed until the end of the next turn. You've got it.

And while they're doomed, you deal an additional bit of damage to them when you hit them. Great. So that's your bonus action. So can I attack with my? You can. Oh, tight. So I'm going to attack with my longsword. Let's do it.

Nope. 12? 12, they're quick. And while this flash of light hits them and you can see this faint, tingling burn that is now curling around their shoulders and trying to pat it out, they see you swing towards and they pull back and duck out of the way.

It just misses the face by inches. And you can see now that feral energy is beginning to feel momentarily surrounded by the rest of you. But no, that does not hit, unfortunately. I'm dead. Finish your turn. All right, Hua, you're up, and Slaughter, you're on deck.

Is anyone within five feet of the enemy? Are we all within five feet? I'd say no. The only person who's directly within five feet would be Tavima. So I want to hit you. Okay. Live your dreams. I'll do an easy thing.

I reach behind my cape, and you see my eyes turn blank white. No one hurts my friends! And I pull out my ice staff, and I go for a melee attack. Go for it. That's going to be 14 plus three is 17. 17 will hit.

Go ahead and roll damage on that. All right, that's the eight. She didn't actually hurt me, but go off. Maybe she hurt your feelings, I don't know. That is important. Oh goodness, that is an eight plus eight. That's a 16. And I'm going to use my bonus action as an expert hunter

to use one stamina and add one DT10 damage. So that's... Slick. Yes, it's 18 plus, so where's my D10? Come here. Five. Great. Oh yeah. So it's a... 16 plus five is 21 total damage. Whew.

All right, so out of nowhere, the extremely socially engaged hostess, which up to this point, had mostly a business relationship, seems to just, with absolute anger, mark this antagonistic force that showed up and with a resounding crack, upsides her in the temple.

And for a moment, you watch the back foot begin to give as she begins to stumble and then catches herself, almost losing a sword, and then props back up into space, looks back over the shoulder and growls towards you. Ooh. Ooh. All righty. Does that finish your turn? Yes.

You got it. That brings us to Slaughter, Mallory Yarn Day. I call out to the figure, you had a quick meal, but you forgot dessert! And I will pull out a skull from my belt. And I will use one magicka to infuse it with magical fire. And I will go, Ah!

I'll throw the skull at our patron. Go for it. The patron looks at you, like growling, looks towards you and goes, What? Surprise! I rolled to hit with spellcasting. 12 to hit? 12 does not hit.

Surprised as they may be, she sidesteps and the skull just swings by, glancing off of your shield with a magical spark and rolls to the ground a few feet away. Does it come back? It does, it returns to my hand. Yes! Oh no. On a success, it returns to my hand. I don't know what happens on a fail.

It's just rolled away. You have to go retrieve it now. I need that spotter! Do you want me to? I'm sorry, do you want me to? Can you? Just slowly leave it down. I guess that's my turn. Although, who's up next?

Do you, do I look, does Mallory, do you have things to chop or cut with, or are you? I have a stick. You have a stick. But you're more of a magic thing? I have a stick. You have a stick. But you're more of a magic thing? But I have a stick. I'm going to hit him with a stick. You're going to hit him with a stick?

Yeah. All right, sure. I will use as a bonus action, Hungry Scythe, where I can infuse a melee weapon with necrotic energy. Ooh! So I will do that. I'll just point at your stick and go. Your parents messed you up, man.

I'm eager to serve! They really did a number on you. That's it. All right, Mallory, you're up. I'm going to use my bonus action to cast Crystal Weapon on my now-infused staff. All righty. And I'm going to take a bonus action to cast Crystal Weapon on my now-infused staff. All righty. And I'm going to take a swing.

Go for it. Ooh, 19 to hit. That'll definitely hit. So that's, I should have probably put the correct dice aside. That's, what did you give extra? I think I read it wrong. It doesn't do anything to your weapon.

It just heals me. But it's still cool. It's glowing purple and black. It heals you and he heals you. That's awesome. Yep. That's seven damage. Seven damage, you got it. I wasn't hurt, but I feel great.

That's, their AC is down by two. Indeed. Until my next turn, so. You got it. So as you arc towards it, the staff turning, this rocky, jagged crystal outside, you spin it, you watch this purplish necrotic energy almost screaming through the air. Yeah!

As you swing it wide, it impacts. Ooh, that's a tingle. A little B12 shot. Yeah. What did you get me into? Sorry. Does that finish your turn, Matt? Yeah, that's everything.

All righty, but that brings it to Grelnok. Your turn. I'm going to strike out right away with a venomous claw straight at her face. Out of the gate, okay. Out of the gate, going for it. Go for it. strike out right away with a venomous claw straight at her face. Out of the gate, okay. Out of the gate, going for it. Go for it. Proficiency and your strength, which would be plus five total. Okay. Nope! Oh wait, Proficiency, nope!

The AC is lower, so you never know. What'd you roll? Nine. Nine. As you angrily streak outward, just putting all of your fury into this claw strike, this woman, this roguish figure who has been bludgeoned back and forth a bit, now ducks low, and the shadows seem to almost gather

and coalesce for a second as you swing outward. Suddenly, she's just not there where you thought she was and she's ducked out of the way in an instant. I'm going to keep using my momentum and spin all the way around and bring my axe around and swing low, like where it seemed like she ducked. Go for it. Take the axe out. All righty.

Kill me! 10! That's the plan, honey! Goddamn. Ew. No, all right, so now that misses. Cool! That's all I got! All righty.

Finishing your turn at the top of the round now. The rogue once more shakes her head up and goes, this isn't how it's supposed to go. First, let's see if this comes back. I don't want to roll anything, because it's going to roll well when I don't care. Yeah. All of these are.

Turn instead towards you, who got the heavy hit as well. It's going to go ahead and bonus action mark you instead. It goes, we're going to dance. And it's going to go ahead and go action mark you instead. He goes, we're going to dance. And is going to go ahead and go for a multi-attack against you. I really love dancing.

My eyes flip back for a second. Dancing's really wonderful. Right as you get to the end of that, dancing's really wonderful. It was like one, or sorry, two natural 20. So that's a natural 20 hit with a short sword and a 10 with a dagger. Does the 10 hit? Oh, 10 does not hit.

Okay, but you do take... plus an additional 14 points of slashing damage from the crit plus the additional damage from being marked by this figure. She is intent and furious. And after doing that strike, sees that you're not going down, she is surrounded and is.

Is going to go ahead and try and start backing up towards the shed once more. And he's glancing towards the back wall where the damage has been impacted. That would put her within melee to youth four, actually. So all of you do get an attack of opportunity as she begins to dart towards the back of the shed. Do I get one?

Yeah, all of you who wish to take it gets a. Four meaning me or what? No, sorry. The four who made melee attacks. You threw the skull from a distance. I did. Was it? 18. That hits. Yes.

Eight points. Laura, burn. Earl! I think it's because I've got my Jester dice out and they're like, don't. They don't like this character. I know. I don't want her. I don't belong here. Yeah.

I should have gotten a whole new set of dice. Wow! You get one hit. Yeah, eight points of piercing damage. Eight points of piercing damage. Oh wait, hold on, I get my 2d4, right? Because of? Yeah, because of Backlash. Dope. Add another four to that.

How do you want to do this? Yeah! Sweet. She goes away and I go, no, no, no. And I was leaning down to pick up Slaughter's skull and I just sort of slash back and I want to catch her behind her, and hamstring her and bring her down.

And just stand up and step over her as she bleeds out. Here you go. Don't kill our wall. And she's like, trying to go forward. out. Here you go. Mm-hmm. Don't kill our wall. She's like, trying to move forward. Stop moving. And the light just goes out. I forgot to ask. Should we ask?

We should have asked her what she was doing in the wall. Shoot. My parents would have been, they would have said, like, no, you always torture first before, like, that's their whole thing, I should have remembered. Can't you, like, bring her back or something? Isn't that what necromancers do?

Oh yeah. Or talk to the dead? I can throw a skull at her. Oh, okay. I mean, you might as well. I'm going to go inspect the damage to my beautiful shed. I'm going to find her. What was she doing in our shed? What are you doing?

This seems like more like blood. Are you really swapping out all your dice right now? Of course she is. Those are both good, okay. Hold the show. Hold the show, Laura has to swap out all of her dice. It's entirely on brand. I don't know why you're surprised when I say.

Okay, so while you all take a moment to breathe, your stamina magic come back, you go over and inspect your wonderful shed. And indeed, the back wall, a lot of the wood planks that make up that section of the interior have been splintered and broken back and left the back of the hill behind it that it's built against.

Though where you've always expected upon its acquisition was just rock, there is a faint crevasse. There is a broken opening that leads deeper into the hill behind the shed that is now exposed by the damaged wall. It's just a hole in the shed? Like a crack that leads deeper into the hill beyond it. Into the hill? Indeed. Oh!

I understand. Come on, hidden cavern thing. I didn't put this here. Are you sure it's not a secret? Me, I'm just coughing blood. Cavern, I need to take a knee rest. Oh, are you in? I'm just going to take a little shorty short short rest while you and Vess can get up.

We heal on short rests? Is that what it works? If you want to take an hour long short rest while you investigate. We heal on short rests? Is that what it works? If you want to take an hour long short rest, you can totally do that. Hour? I don't need the short rest, so I'm going to slowly clear the debris to see if we can get easily into this. I'm looting the body.

Okay, go make an investigation check. Yeah. No. It's a six, just a six. Just a six, okay. Just a six. We're not going to win this round, aren't we? The armor is ruined. The last strike that you gave

just carved through the leather plates, and it is, aside from maybe some visual perspective, it's not going to give any additional protection to anybody, anything more than what you already have, at the very least. There is a short sword and dagger that they were carrying. You can pocket those if you'd like. I'll get the dagger. protection anybody, anything more than what you already have at the very least. There is a short sword and dagger that they were carrying. You can pocket those if you'd like. I'll get the dagger.

There's a set of thieves' tools. Ooh. Thieves' tools, yeah. The only other thing you find with that roll is a crumpled, somewhat stained note that you see tucked into one of the belt patches, along with about 25 gold pieces. Ooh. I toss the note and I hand the gold to you.

Better tip. Oh, that's very nice of you. We should split this, though. We should keep it to pay the tax man. Oh, we're going to need it for the tax guy. Yes, that's true. It was like I was trying to do a callback to the... Thank you.

Go. Since I'm laying on the floor, taking my... A note? A note? Oh, it was a note. Yeah. I'll go back and pick it up. I was going to say, since I'm laying on the floor, taking my rest, I go and grab the note. Yeah, that's fair.

And I just hold it up. Can someone else read this? I'm a little sleepy. I toss it to one of y'all. There you go. All right. So as you were cleaning the debris, you're taking a short rest. Everybody who wants to, who needs to, you can use your- I was helping to clean the debris, so this should really be slaughter.

Oh, okay. I'll read the note, I guess. Okay. Is it in a language I can comprehend? Yes, it is. Excellent. In the Common Tongue here, it reads, Scout if you lack the brass, but payment in full awaits should you find what lies at the heart of the ruin.

My searches point to one of the disparate hills in Grotwood, likely forgotten. Seek a masked entrance and be wary of Daedric dangers or unwanted interests. Locations such as these are generally meant to keep something out or unwanted interests. Locations such as these are generally meant to keep something out or something within. And it's signed, Lyranth. Lyranth.

So me, Sam Riegel, knowing all the Elder Scrolls Online lore, do I recognize any of those names? Not at all. Not in this book. Cool, cool, cool. Even if I did know the Elder Scrolls online lore? You might've, but Sam Riegel and the character you portray in this

have no idea who that is. Cool, cool, cool. Who's Derrick Danger? Does anyone know that name? It sounds really funny. I relay this all to my business partners and colleagues. Does it say the actual amount? The amount that they would get if they succeed? Yeah. I turn it over.

Any amounts? No amounts on this note, no. I assume it's more than 300 gold, though. Who's it signed by? Derek Danger? No, I don't know. Lyrenth. Lyrenth. I wrote it down on everything. Lyrenth, yeah.

Does it look, like looking at the signature, kind of like peek over Slaughter's shoulder, does it look at all like the signature? Watch out, my shoulder's really pointy. It's very pointy. I can feel it a little bit on your cheek. Yeah. Like just ow.

When I'm using my pen to write down notes and stuff, I just put it up here. Like I can just stick it on a hill whenever I want. Does that mean every time you make contact with a patron, there's like spines, so it's just ow? Oh, I didn't think it on a hill whenever I want. Does that mean every time you make contact with a patron, there's spines, so it's just out? Oh, I didn't think about that, but yes, yes. I've got needles all over my body. Sorry, go on.

No, you're good. Does it look at all like the signature from the official documents from that awful elf that we saw earlier? Make an intelligence check. Oh no, why do we have to make a roll about it? Eight. Eight? Okay.

I mean, the handwriting is fairly good. It doesn't seem as fancy and presentory as that note, maybe. You don't recognize, or can't really find any through line to it, but it's nice handwriting. Cool. Cursive is a lost art. It really is.

I'll keep the note for later. We've got to start putting orders on you. Did you check a boots? Oh. There's always money in the boots. Oh. I go back and yank off the boots. Okay. You do find 45 additional gold pieces. Shut up!

You're a genius. Does she have a clay pot? I usually find something in the clay pot. Sorry. Does anyone want boots? The only joke I have. Do we need any? Does she have better boots than us? Yeah. Her boots are pretty slick.

For as, it's interesting, for as dirty as she presents herself from the exterior, the actual interior, the cloak, the armor, the weapons, very well made. Definitely putting on an appearance. I'm pretty tall. My feet are pretty big. You should just try them on.

Just, they don't fit. They fit you? I don't know. Nah, nah. Do you want to try the boots on? I'm still laying on the ground, bleeding a little bit. Well, actually. Yeah, I just lift her leg up and just like.

These are very nice boots, which to me, it seems to mean that she was hiding her appearance. Perhaps she was a rich person in pauper's clothing for a reason. I don't know what that reason is, but maybe she's hiding something. And there's probably gold in the hills.

Take a nap. She went to sleep. I'm just going to put the boot on her. She'll be happy when she wakes up with the boot. Yeah! There you go. I just want you all to know, I'm Rusty. We've been in that bar for a while. Obviously, I'm a much better fighter

than what you just saw. You're a fantastic barkeep. Yeah. You make an amazing drink. I've never heard anyone come into our establishment and order something that you did not know how to make without even looking it up. You're incredible. Why do you also have to be an amazing fighter?

You're a great bartender. Okay, I like where that started, but if you also have to be an amazing fighter? You're a great bartender. Okay, I like where that started, but if you want to also be a good fighter, how about this? The next time I have to fight someone and bounce them out, I'll go behind the bar and you can do the murder part. You just keep it up. Yeah. Thank you.

You got to stay loose. Yeah. But what you said, too. Both things. By the way, I don't know any of those drinks. Literally make them up every time. Did you not know that? No, I get lots of questions about the drinks

and I tell them that they're wrong, that they've been taught wrong. Good job. You made a liar of me. That's why I get terrible tips. I'm lying to the customers all the time. That's not why you get terrible tips. I'm going to go just close up the,

if we're going, it seems like we're going into this creepy tunnel, right? Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to go close up the restaurant, take out my towel, just wipe down the tables and just make sure all the doors are shut nicely. You got it. After I'm done with all that,

I just look into the dark restaurant and say, we'll be back. Aw. We'll be back. Aw, slaughter. Some of us. Some of us will be back. Sorry. I like your confidence. All right. I'm optimistic.

While you're doing all that and you're all getting yourself arranged for whatever this mystery is, begin pulling apart and opening this space to get a little more traversable. You finish taking your shirt rest. You can go ahead and use your hit dice to do some healing, if you'd like.

I did that. I got my healing. A little bit. I'm 16 out of 21 now. It's fine. There you go. You're fine. I'll be fine. You're fine. Are we allowed to restore our magicka and stamina? Yes. Elvira strolls online and she's all yellowed up.

Your stamina and your magicka. My stamina and my magicka. My stamina. Dang it! They restore. Ruined everyonea. My stanima. Dang it! They restore. Ruined everyone now. When you have a moment to get a breath. Yeah, after combat. You got it.

We play Outer Souls online. All right. You gather yourselves. Anything else you want to do? I think I got bored waiting for Hua to wake up and I'm just shaving little bits. I'm trying to subtly shave little bits of pork while Mallory's not licking. You don't have to be subtle.

I pull out, just start carving off some jerky. Thank you. There's also some cheese sitting in the corner. I also use this as a cheese house. Thank you. I wake up, I'm covered in bits of cheese and pork because I'm laying there. Some nice boots, too.

And nicer boots, and I'm just like, oh, a feast, great. Okay. Am I carrying this for us? One of these snacks? For these trip snacks? Just put them in a bag. And with that final hit,

the wood cracks back and you can see now this, you can probably fit one at a time with this entrance with a narrow squeeze, especially for the taller of you. But there is already, even just this bit, an odd warm air emitting from the interior. What's it smell like? Make a perception check.

Okay, I'll roll a dice. I believe you. What is going on in there? I rolled a five. I rolled a two and added three, four of five. Allergies, I take it. You can't really smell anything. Shake it off the dust, shake it off! Weirdly, the physical action of striking this,

you know, the adrenaline gets pumping and sometimes your sinuses just begin to swell up a bit. And so you're a little clogged and congested and not get much of a smell. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. I feel like this does possibly put another vote in for the Dirty Hole, so. The Dirty Hole is the name of our establishment?

Yes! It does kind of... Here we are. It was Dingy Hole, but. Dingy Hole, so. The Dirty Hole is the name of our establishment? Yes! It does kind of... Here we are. It was Dingy Hole, but... Dingy Hole. The Dirty Hole's pretty good, too. This is where my brain goes. Yeah, we have a pit now. We have our own pit. Yeah. Who's first?

Oh, the Dirty Pit, that's a good one, too. I take out a piece of paper. Yeah. We should keep track. I'll go. I'll go in. You'll go first? Yeah. You're first. I'll duck through. Are you sure? Because the rolling.

You know what? If something takes me, I deserve it at this point. I'll go next. All right. One by one, you all slowly begin to step within the dark, mysterious, unknown crack in the hill that descends from the earth below as the camera pans past to see the gored body

that's been left out in the open, unhidden. Yep. Oh. Oh. Wait a minute. What does it do? What's it do? I thought it was in the shed. It's our shed. It's our corpse. Well, should we at least dress it up like it's a piece of meat that's curing?

We should make sure it's in the shed. It's in the shed, right? It is in the shed. What, do you want to bring it in the hole? I'll come back out of the craw and just drag it into the... There you go. Here, look. Wedge it in there.

All righty. We should shut the shed. Make sure the shed is shut. Oh yeah, okay, hold on. Should I lock us in? Is that weird? No, no, just close the door. Okay, cool. Okay. All right. You begin to squeeze through the cracks and the opening descends further and further

to meet with a wider tunnel of odd ancient architecture carved somewhere between rock and root. Simple at times, but detailed and otherworldly at others. There's something strange and unfamiliar about the space you've wandered into. You can see this arched, stone-carved ceiling aperture above you.

You can see faint details, and even the natural cavern floor here at times seems to have a smoothed, intentionally set pattern to it. To the left a ways up, you can see there's a double door and to the right, it continues to spiral subtly downward and out of sight beyond the wall.

Well, there's doors or we go darker down, down this darker hole area here. What seems safest? Do we have any sort of torches or anything? Candles? Oh, did we grab any of that from the? I didn't bring any candles. Hold on, I'll run back to the tavern.

We'll run back to the tavern, grab us some of our lanterns. Okay. Come running back. As you run back, you get the lanyards on and now you see the wonderful architecture in front of you in detail. Whoa! This is cool! We missed it the first time.

Two of you, you can decide, can make either a history or religion checks as you get more detailed glances at the interior of this walkway. Anyone? Any of us good at anything? I mean. I'll do a history check. You guys can do it. I'll do a religion check.

All righty, two of you. I'll admire the architecture. With G-Money. Doric. 18 total. 18? Ionian. 16, great. Corinthian. Fine Corinthian leather. Elements of the columns and shapes of the interior

and the iconography that you can occasionally see carved in elements give you the sense that some of this is intentionally or alluding to something beyond Nieren. Certainly Daedric in nature, something that whispers of the Void of Oblivion and other darker spaces beyond the natural world. This is some really spooky stuff down here.

Where we are heading, maybe Slaughter's family might know something about it. It seems like there are dark powers at work here. So if we want to continue for the money to keep the tavern alive, we should do so, but there will probably be peril, I think. I like peril. It's between this and the tax collector.

I'm okay with this. I think. I'll up peril. It's between this and the tax collector. I'm okay with this. We're partners in this establishment and we do things together, so yes, I'm with you. Okay, let us go forward then. Like the way. There were doors? How big are these doors?

These are about 20 feet tall and roughly nine to 10 feet wide, and it's double door set. So total about almost 20 feet tall, 20 feet wide between the two of them. Heavy, heavy lock mechanism across the front of it. What if we took these from here and put them at the front of it. What if we took these from here and put them at the front of the dingy hole?

Upgrade. That would really class the place up. Right? They're beautiful, but scary. And we could call it the double door. Yeah. That's not very good. Can I see any kind of lock that you can,

is it open, Can we unlock it? You do see what looks to be two heavy, almost metallic set handles, brass and coloration, like a full foot top to bottom bolted into each side. You go and give a tug. Not moving. Solid in place. Make a strength check if you'd like.

Let's go. You want to help out? Yeah. All right, so take away the advantage or you both roll independently. All you. I know what I said as I said it, and I'm so sorry. Gosh. 12. 12. Best roll of the night.

It is my best roll ever! That's good. It's trending upward. They do not budge. Woo! Not a single bit of movement. No sounds, no creak, no scrape. They are solid. Does it look like there's a lock, like a lock mechanism anywhere on it?

You can make an investigation check for that. Why? Because that's what you were requesting. Three! Hey, look. Both of us are doing pretty shit. We're doing great. I just throw the thieves' tools at Mallory,

like, I don't know. Do something. I'm not, you're better with tools than I, I assume. I'm going to take a look at this lock, see if I can figure out anything about it. Are you attempting to inspect it, or are you attempting to unlock it? I'm going to try and unlock it.

Okay. Go ahead and roll a dexterity check. Are you proficient with these? There's no lock. Yeah, there's not even a lock. No, I'm not proficient. I look very careful. So just roll and make a dexterity check. There's nothing.

Here's my question to you. Do you think you would be proficient in thieves' tools? No. Then no. Then you just make a dexterity check. There's nothing. Here's my question to you. Do you think you would be proficient in thieves' tools? No. Then no. Then you just roll a dexterity check. You're a cook. You got knife skills. Knife hands. What are lock picks but tiny spatulas for a lock?

Mm-hmm. That'll point. Yes. Okay, 17. 17. You do begin to see facets of the door that have a locking mechanism ingrained within it. And you begin to fiddle with these tools that you are assuming would be functional in this, and you feel pretty fiddle with these tools that you

are assuming would be functional in this, and you feel pretty confident in your ability to manipulate the interior of this lock. You hear a click, and a second click, and then it sticks. You feel like you're close, but it didn't quite, didn't quite. It's a very, very tough lock.

I mean, I'm feeling, I'm feeling, I don't know if I can take this any further. I'm not sure. Do we need a key? Maybe. No, I was just going to say, is there anything else around the room? Any other markings or?

Aside from just the interesting architecture, not much in this walkway, other than just the other path that continues to curve. There is another path. Yeah, maybe we just try the other path. Maybe we'll find a key over there, or someone would just have dropped it somewhere really noticeable.

Am I just going to leave these lockpicks in, or am I going to give it one more push? You keep trying, and I'm just on the other door handle. Just. I'll take one more stab. All right, do a disadvantage. Oh, okay, that's... Yeah. I inspire you.

You're partway through here. You're partway through, but... Huh? Disadvantage. Yes. 19. Oh! I rolledvantage. Yes. 19. Ow! I rolled an 18 and a 20. Ah!

Damn, okay. Hey, Dice, you can roll that high, too. Yeah, listen, little. You just got to want it, buddy. I mean, I'm going to be kind to you. Look, listen, guys. Hey, Dice, we're grading on a curve here. You really sped up. Hold on.

Which is better, my intimidation or my persuasion? Listen, you little bitches. So as you've fiddled with lockpicks once or twice in your past, long ago, an old past you'd like to forget. And it's not so much the lockpicks, as much as this is a very large locking mechanism, an old one, it seems. And as you begin to see it And it's not so much the lock picks, as much as this is a very large locking mechanism,

an old one, it seems. And as you begin to see it and why it's caught, it's not because the lock picks aren't getting there, it's because it's just a very detailed, intricate lock. And there's just enough room for a finger to get in there. A terrible idea. A terrible idea. But you see a tiny hook on the inside that you think seems to be connected.

Oh no. No, no, no, no, no, no. Yes, yes, of course. What are you going to do? Not do it? Of course you're going to do it. Do I have anything I can use for this? What about that sausage? One of the sausages? What about the incredibly spiky waiter next to you? So I'm going to try and wrap some cured meat around it in a little, and use that as a pull.

Because you are a cook and you are an experienced handler of cured meats. Yeah, yeah, you rolled high on lock peg, sure. The meat begins to give ever so slightly and you get nervous. The beads of sweat dripping down your forehead as everyone's tense, looking forward. The dust is in your nostrils and you're shaking slightly, and you get nervous. The beads of sweat dripping down your forehead as everyone's tense, looking forward. The dust is in your nostrils

and you're shaking and shaking and you pull and you feel it splitting, splitting, but just enough tension for that little metal hook to go and as it does, the doors open and reveal a wide staircase that descends further and deeper down beneath the hill. Nice. Begging.

Yeah. Wow. Something, something ham-fisted. It was a really good idea to bring all of this extra meat with us. Yeah. I take a little. Ooh, you've been locked, meat. You know why? You know why?

Because you waited until it was pork o'clock, you know? You waited until it was the time. It's got to, it has to have time. Yep. So we're going down there. We're not going to go down the other winding twisty path? I feel like we should still at least see what, like give it a little peeksies around the corner

and see what it is. Good call. Eh? All right, I'll give it a little peeksies around the windy path. On the windy path? Okay. It continues to spiral down. You're not quite sure how far it can go. Do you continue to follow it?

Bend your vision. I'll go a little bit further, like 20 more feet. Okay. You continue to curve around that way and you see it begin to open into a subterranean chasm space. There is what looks to be about a 25, 30-foot-wide break where beneath the hill, you start getting

this dense, dense bedrock period, and there is just a wide chasm that carves through, maybe about 30 feet high up from you and 70 or so feet down. With just your lantern light, you have no idea how deep that chasm is, and it looks like there is, or was at one point, some sort of a stone land bridge between here

and the opposite wall, in which there is a slight shelf and another opening that continues onward. But whatever there was that connected these two has crumbled beneath. All right. But it could be traversable with a little bit of ingenuity.

I'll go back and tell the others. It was like a big cave with a drop. It was a bridge that broke. I say we take the stairs. Yeah. I agree. I agree. I mean, they had these doors, they're locked. It seems important. This is the way to go. Right? Yeah.

Yeah, you would lock up a treasure. You wouldn Yeah? Yeah, you would lock up a treasure. You wouldn't, yes, you would lock up a treasure. You would just put it at the end of a cave. Yeah. Plus, I don't think anyone can jump super far, right? We're not very good at anything. No. We're restaurateurs. How can you just

just ride behind the bar the whole time? Right? In our shed. It's very coincidental that we need money and we found it right away. But also, could be a selling point. True. You know, like, come to the Dirty Hole, and if you spend a certain amount,

you get a quick tour of the Dirty Hole. Oh, like an escape room thing. An escape room is a great idea! It's like a theme restaurant now. I love it. This is very good. I like it. And now it makes sense to call it the Dirty now. I love it. I'm born with it. This is very good. I like it. And now it makes sense to call it the dingy hole. Really?

It's a theme restaurant. Well, it's not, it doesn't have to be dingy. We can make it really nice in here, put lights up, and it could be like the... The glory hole? A really nice hole? A really nice hole. A really nice hole. Come to our really nice hole? A really nice hole. A really nice hole.

Come to our really nice hole. Take a look. That sounds better than dingy to me. Take a look at our really nice hole. Hold him, Nell. It's nice and exciting, and you must escape from it. We're still workshopping. We're still workshopping.

I write it down. I write it down. We move into the room. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So these stone stairs begin to descend. They're the same width as the entryway. So you have 20-foot wide stone steps

that just descend further into darkness. Who's going first? What is the marching order for this? Do you want to go first? Do we have a, I'll go first. Again, okay. Sure, sure. Are you feeling confident? Always. Maybe.

Sure. I'm going to keep an eye out for any traps on the ground. How's your darkvision? It's good. All right, I'll also join then. Where does it say that? Bottom left. Oh, I guess I don't have it then. Same! Oh, I have dark right, I'll also join then. Where does it say that? Bottom left. Oh, I guess I don't have it then.

Same! Oh, I have darkvision. I forgot. I'm an elf. I'll bring up the rear. All righty. So you're keeping an eye out for perception or investigation, your choice. 15!

Hey! Yeah! All righty. So. The stairs continue down 50, 60 or so feet before evening out to an archway. This standing 15, 20 or so foot tall space comes to a gradual point, and then it opens up into a wider hall beyond. As you're all stepping forward,

you glance down, looking at the floor, and right beyond the archway, there is a faint smear of long, dried blood there is a faint smear of long, dried blood that is just faintly visible on the stones beyond. Hey-oh, we got blood. You? Old.

Is it wine blood or just normal? Mm. It's still wet. Oh. Normal. It's normal blood. That's weird. Can I do a nature check to see what kind of creature's blood it is?

Ooh. Yes, you may. Yeah, right? Not right? Oh, that's very good. 17 plus four. It's like a 21. Nice. Humanoid. Some sort of humanoid blend.

Is it a bird? No, it's not a bird. That would be terrible. It's actually a person down here. A human. I quite like birds. But that means that someone is here, has beat us to this area?

How is that possible? We just discovered the hole into this place. Maybe they came up from the other tunnel. Oh, yeah. Yeah, maybe. But they would have had to open. If they just live here. Or they came from around the back. Maybe they just live here.

Or there's multiple entrances, we don't know. Or they have the key to this door. Key. What's up with this smear? Is it just across and then stops? Does it trail off in a direction? or there's multiple entrances, we don't know. Or they have the key to this door. Key. What's up with the smear? Is it just across and then stops? Does it trail off in a direction? Yeah.

Well, as you, because you rolled pretty high, the smear is your first glance. And as you all inspect and do your moment of checking in on it, the group's about to move forward and instinctually, you put your hands out and you realize the smear continues on beyond the archway

to the wall on the side where you see there is, against the stone wall, an impacted crater, cracked, where the stone is broken and there is a crushed body that is just completely inverted and bloodied and ruined, pushed into a long, probably multiple impacted indent. You do not see what did it, but the blood trail continues and spatters across.

If I look up, does it look like a pendulum would have swung and crushed something? You glance up in the other space and put the lantern up and you can see there is a chain affixed to the wall above. And on the opposite end, there is a massive rock about four feet across that is currently just ratcheted and ready to go. And glancing down at where that blood smear is,

you now glance and see the stonework right beyond the arch for about two feet. It's just ever so slightly raised against the surrounding stone. Okay, cool, cool, cool, cool. Nod step on this. Yep. At this point, you also hear a grinding sound.

Oh, oh. Behind where you came. The door. The door. That's how. It's an escape room. That makes sense. It's an escape room! We already have one. We already did it. This is very exciting.

This is super cool. We're going to have to do a lot of insurance paperwork. At least it's already set up, and that's really nice. Yeah. Not too much renovation. You just make everyone sign a waiver. You can get away with anything. There we go. Can I see what looks like a safe place to put our feet?

About two feet beyond that, you hope. Take a little hop. I'm going to hop. You're just going to little hop. I'm going to hop. You're just going to, oh. I'm going to hop. Buddy. All right. You watch as Grelnod just goes, does a little jaunt over those,

that little platform area, and land on the opposite side. Your feet hit the stone, and as they do, nothing happens. Hey, next time we could throw a skull or something. I'm just. Ooh, that would've been smart. Make a leap. We're fine.

All right. I'll run and leap. One by one, you all begin to leap over, make it comfortably to the other side, and dusting yourself off, glancing about this larger chamber that at first glance, it's odd. You see signs of,

not dungeon, not dingy, trapped torture space, much to your family's chagrin, but just some broken tables and seats, like a common room. There's some stools and shattered dishware on the ground, There's some stools and shattered dishware on the ground, some bent or broken tools amongst the fallen shale.

Like a sealed underground living space left to ruin. like a sealed underground living space left to ruin. There are two corpses dressed in dark, shifty gray leather that are sitting on far ends of the room away from you. Are they old corpses, new corpses? They're a ways from you. Do you want to go inspect?

Yeah, but keeping an eye out for any trapsies. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, well, make an investigation check. Or perception, your choice. Can I assist? If you'd like to. I believe in you. Oh, right, I'm just going to roll my...

Okay, give me, okay. Oh! They're getting better and better. 21. Yay! Do you think it started bad and is getting better and better and will go back around again?

No, no, no, no, no! You're an asshole. So yeah, you glance forward. You do not see any traps in the pathway to these bodies. And as you approach, pushing past some of the long, dusted, forgotten signs of life that have since been left still and alone for some time, you approach the bodies and at first glance,

they're not smashed by traps. There is what looks to be all manner of slash marks across them, gashes, heavy wounds, and chunks missing. Ragged, broken chunks, bitten, pulled off. And as soon as you notice that, a sound catches your ear. Probably.

And you see now, glancing up, lantern ahead, in this open room, there are some alcoves set off to the side, where some small benches were set once, some shelf space where some books may have once been set that are now been removed. There are signs that this was once probably a comfortable subterranean vault-like space,

as well as three doors in this room. There's one on the eastern side away from you and a north side on the left, a south side on the right. But in one of these alcoves on the side, you watch as massive, clawed, leathery hands pull around the corner. The light hits black, pupil-less, dark marble-like eyes

that glisten against the light as a nine-foot-tall, hulking, crocodile-like humanoid, with a long gnarled snout filled with teeth. Looks right at you. Goes into a full run. That's where we're going to take a break. Oh! We're going to jump into this combat here

in just a moment. But in the interim, stay tuned and see what the next half of this story has to tell about the dingy hole, the dirty hole, the dirty. The very clean, the very nice hole. The very nice, very good hole. The very nice hole. The very nice hole. There you go.

We'll see you guys here in a little bit. Thank you for listening to this special one-shot inspired by the Elder Scrolls Online Blackwood, sponsored by our friends at Bethesda and ZeniMax Online Studios. If you like what you're hearing, please consider leaving us a review on whatever podcasting app you're using. Your review helps support the show and bring new listeners into the fold. Okay, let's get back to the action. And welcome back. So, as you all begin to step into this forgotten subterranean common room, and upon inspecting the scattered bodies, a creature seemed to stir. A gator-like, humanoid Daedric beast

began to charge towards you, and I need everyone to roll initiative. Great! Yay. Okay, guys, we had a conversation. No. All right. Yes! This is being very nice to me today. All righty, 25 to 20.

30, 20. Nice! All righty. Tiffy, come to 20. 30, 20. Nice, all righty. Taking him up front. 20 to 15. Me. All righty. 19. 19? Oh damn, was right up. 17.

All right, and we got Gryll. 16 over here. Great, good slot. All righty. 15 to 10. I guess, what do you got? Two. Two? Oh, sorry, Mallory.

It's very hard to roll a two, let me tell you. I can, yeah. Hardly do worse. All righty. Top of this, as the creature is now charging forward, its long tail behind it, its scaled, heavily armored hide. Its head seems to end in these long, crooked horns

as its mouth is just open, salivating, fangs teeth outward towards you. You're up first, Tiffy. Nice. I want to slide forward and interpose myself between Grelnok and this bad boy, and then also charge at it, and shield charge this bad boy.

Hell yeah, let's do it! Okay. All right, so I'm spending two stamina, and I got rolled a hit. No! I rolled so bad. Oh. 11. 11. Hey. No.

Shields forward, you rush to go ahead and slam into it, and it's like hitting a wall, because it's charging full bore towards her. You interpose, and right as you go to hit, instead, whack, it hits you, and you get thrown back about three or four feet. You land on your back, but kick back up. But unfortunately, it didn't seem to leave much of an impact

on the creature. Dunk, that's me. All right, finishing Tavira's go, that brings us to Hwa, and Grolnok, you're on deck. Okay, I activate my magicka. I'm going to cast Swarm. So it's a range of 60 feet, so I can stay where I am. And I spend two magicka to summon

a five-foot radius swarm of Fetcher flies. Remember those guys? They will obey my commands. I'm unsure if this means, as your action, you may will them to move and attack anything in the space. Do I summon them first and then I order them the next time, or can I order them now? No, you can order them now. Excellent, I do so.

All righty. And the creature must make a DC 14 constitution save. You've got it. Let's go. That is a six, that is a failure. Yes, they take 4d6 damage! Go for it. Got them all set up here. Whoosh. There's the flies.

One, two, three. Swarm over and swarm around this creature, biting, stinging. That is seven damage. Seven damage to it, you've got it. Nice. It is now clawing around in the middle of this cloud of swirling fetcher flies.

Does that finish your turn? Stay put? It finishes my turn, and I stay in concentration. Fantastic, you got that. Bringing that up to Grelnok's turn with Slaughter on deck. How far away is it? From you, it's about 10 feet from you, since you did have an interposed moment

with Tevima stopping you. All right, I'm going to run up behind it. Do I get advantage if I'm flanking? Currently, I'll say sure, why not? All right. Yeah. It'll take your full movement, but you do manage to get in a position where now you and Tavima are pincer attacking it.

Flipped up, like. Yeah. Let's go. You got it. Cool, then I'm going to get behind it and go and try to get it with my venomous claw. Do it, do it. Venomous claw. Spend that stamina.

Venomous claw! Natural one! It went back around! It went back around! All right, start it all over again. Woo! You did this! Yeah, I did it. Get rid of that stamina, and I'm going to.

As you go running past, claw out. Oh wait, I get advantage. Because you have a flank, you do. Flanking. Ooh. Yes! Come on, natural 20. Two. Oh! That's way better!

That's 21! Yes! That hits. That hits. Go ahead and roll some damage. Yeah! I broke the casket-o. Ha! Right.

I think it's finally coming up, Groma. That's poison damage on this. That's really good. 15 plus three is 18 poison damage, plus my strength modifier, which is plus three. Slick. Damn. And that's my bonus action.

All right. So after that, I'm going to whip out my axe and swing at its back. The claw sinks in deep, and as you carve across, you can now see that thick, thick Daedric hide does split, and you watch as the black venom left behind from this instilled, forced bit of energy. Oh! What happened?

Something flew far. You swing back with your axe. I set it at an eight, but I landed on a 20 on my d20! Wow. There you go. A two and a 20. Let's go! Go for it. Cool.

So that's 1d12 plus three, so I just double the dice. Double the dice. Seven times two is 14, plus three is 20 points. Oh, what? Nice. Still alive? The axe carves through, and you cut back, and the tail behind it just slops off.

You sever it from the body, and it hits the ground, and it's still flexing and curling on its own, now detached from the body. I'm going to use one more stamina, and I'm going to try to hit it again with my free action. Let's go. Oh no, that just adds a d8 slashing damage. Correct.

That's six additional points. Six additional points of damage. Beefy. It's looking real hurt. Let's go! Hey. All right. That finishes your go, Grelnok. That brings us to Slaughter. Oh, great.

I will yell at the creature. You can't have a table here without a reservation! And I'll pull out a skull, my lucky skull. Give it a little kiss. Say, div viva, duck! And I'll throw the flaming skull at the creature. Okay, go ahead and roll for D-10.

Oh, it's a four. Plus six is 10. Not enough. I forgot to light it on fire first of all! Yeah, the skull, it literally is just a skull. It goes to the air, it just rolls in the ground, no effect. I'm the worst necromancer.

I will then use the rest of my action to just run around. Those dead bodies, do they have any weapons or anything? Do you want to take your turn trying to look through? That's all I got. I mean, I guess I could do a bonus action, but it just heals me.

It's up to you. So I'm fine. So I'm just going to look around this body. Okay, you start rummaging through the bodies. Make an investigation check. Okay. Okay, okay. Nine. Check some stuff out.

Yep, nine. Yeah. I mean, one of them you see has a longsword on the ground. You've seen all different metals, but at first glance, this has a unique color and texture to it. Not quite something you're familiar with. Grab it. All right. Finishing your turn, Slaughter.

It is now the Daedroth's turn. No! As it's angrily spinning around now, feeling surrounded, you, Grelnok, pincered in the back, ready, feeling confident after a heavy round, you hear this

from behind you. Uh-oh. You glance over your shoulder and charging out of one of the alcoves from the direction to the left of where you entered, a second one comes barreling out and is now going to be attacking you, Pinsir. Hi, buddy. So this one's going to go ahead and...

You know what? Yeah, it's going to go ahead and bite attack you. So it goes for a full-on... Bring up my axe. What? Yeah, it's going to go ahead and bite attack you. So it goes for a full-on. Bring up my axe. That is going to be a 17 to hit? 17's my armor class. Okay, so that hits you.

For, not too bad. Not too bad. Six points of piercing damage. As it clamps on, but because you got your axe up just in time, it slams, but you wedge it in there to keep it from closing entirely on you. And the blade carves a little bit into the roof of its mouth,

which causes it to open wide and pull back. So it doesn't actually clamp on your body and backs up. The one that's in between the two of you, wounded and on one knee, almost looking around angrily, glances with you in front. It glances and sees, I think based on directional-wise, actually, I would like to have

Hwa and Mallory both roll d20s for me. Oh god. Just roll d20 and tell me what you got. Five. Six. Oh god. Just roll d20 and tell me what you got. Five. Six. Oh my god! It angles its head in a direction to where it's still facing you, but lines up with you, Hua, and it

releases a column of flaming breath towards both of you. That goes out for 15-foot cone. I need you both to go ahead and roll dexterity saving throws for me, please. Okay. Okay, okay. Oh my god, that's not very good. That's a three? Four?

You both take eight points of fire damage. That feels right. Charred a bit from the flames escaping from its jaws. That finishes their turn, however. The one, yeah, they're both going to stay put because one of them is currently flanked between the two of you, the other one is flanking. So finishing its go, Mallory, you're up

with Tavima on deck. What kind of weapon are you carrying? Shield, sword. Okay, I'm going to run behind you, I'm going to run like Davina, and I'm going to tap your sword as I run by, and I'm going to cast Crystal Weapon. Okay.

The blade suddenly is wrapped in jagged, dark crystalline power. And then I'm going to keep running, and I'm going to see if I can... There's no way to hit both of these. No, so I'm going to have to pick I'm going to see if I can... There's no way to hit both of these. No, so I'm going to have to pick one. How big are these creatures? They're about roughly 10 foot tall

from ground to shoulder, and they're hunched and bulky. One's almost dead, though. One is looking really, really good. I'm going to put a lightning splash sphere right above the one that's almost dead. Okay. I think I can put it somewhere

where it's not going to hit anybody else because it's 10 feet tall. That's a 10-foot sphere of lightning. 10-foot sphere of lightning. And I can stay far away. I will say go ahead and roll, because it is a very tight space between this creature. Well, the creature's kind of long.

Actually, no, the creature takes a 10-foot. Yeah. It is a 10-foot. I can also just put it slightly above as well. Correct. So yeah. Go ahead and roll damage on that. It makes a save. That's a save. Ooh. That's a dex one? Yep. Rolls a 16.

That is a save. So it doesn't take any damage. Rude! Nope, it doesn't. Yeah, sorry. That's okay, that's just a couple magic points. I don't care. Yeah, and I'm just going to back off quite a bit now, as much as I can.

Okay, so now you're getting all the way towards the back wall of this chamber to try and keep away from the middle of the fray. All right, you're done, Mallory. Tavima now you're getting all the way towards the back wall of this chamber to try and keep away from the middle of the fray. All right, you're done, Mallory. Tavima, you're up. Sweet. I'm waving the crystal sword around and I make a little flash of light hit it

and I'm going to cast Back Flash on the one right in front of me. So DC 15 con save. Got it. That's an eight, that is a failure. Yes, all right. It is now surrounded and cursed by the slowly swelling light around it.

Okay, take eight points of fire damage. Great. And you are doomed. And then I'm going to run forward and be like, yeah, does it do any? I'll find out. I'm going to go and try to hit it with the sword. Roll attack. You have advantage because you are flanking.

Okay, 17 and 15. 22. That definitely hits. Go ahead and roll damage. Sweet, okay. 17 and 15. 22. That definitely hits. Go ahead and roll damage. Sweet, okay. Eight plus two more d4. How spicy can I be? Can I add a stamina on that to also puncture it? Sure. I would like to

super kill this thing if I can. This is the hurt one? Yeah. Nice. So make a DC 14 dexterity check. No, that's an 11. Sweet. 18 points. How do you want to do this?

Oh, nice! Yes! Second of the night. Go, and just slice it across its throat. And I want to walk all the way around it as it drops to its knees and take the full skull all the way off and just lift it up and go, new skull! Oh yes, I want!

In a second, hold on. Okay. Show it to the other one. The body hits the ground with a heavy thud as you tear the flesh off of its skull, which is now still glistening red-ish black with the remnant blood across it. Spin it around to show the other one.

You next. Alrighty, finishes your go. Brings it to Hwa with Grelnok on deck. I am pretty bloody and not doing super good, so I'm going to back up approximately as far back as I can get from all the creatures. I'm going to kind of wave my hands like this and a bunch of little mushrooms pop out from my fingertips,

sort of making a semicircle around me. These mushrooms are part of the Funkel Growth Magicka spell. So I can get one D4 hit points every turn for three rounds. And anyone who gets into the circle may also do that if they're feeling yucky. Oh, nice. Hell yeah. I'm going to roll my healing. They begin popping up around you,

these beautiful bioluminescent colors. And as it does, you can feel the energy begin to swell through your body, like this excited butterflies in your stomach and your wounds begin to slowly close. And then that's the end of my turn, because I can't, oh, the flies are still there, but they're not going to attack,

because I don't have a turn for that. Yeah, spend an action to do that, yeah. I am going to use my bonus action to see if I can automatically sense any living creature within a 120-foot cone. Are there more of these, I'm wondering? Good call. Any living creature? Yes.

You do not sense any more of these, I'm wondering. Good call. Any living creature? Yes. You do not sense any more of these creatures. You do sense on the north wall a few odd dots. Something beyond the north wall, there's a cluster that catches your attention. I just yell, let's not open the north door. I'm going to lay down for a second. She's just always napping.

She's doing a mushroom. Do you heal yourself, Strym? Yes, I do. Great. Yeah. All right, that finishes your go. Grelnok, you're up with Slaughter on deck. I say, Mallory, stuffed mushrooms. Ooh! Oh, we could add that to the menu.

Whoa. And I'm going to swing my battle axe at the guy in front. Go for it. Oh, yeah. I don't get advantage anymore. No, because you killed the creature that was between the two of you. Yeah.

Oh, that's still good. 21. That hits. Go ahead and roll damage. This one is currently unscathed, but not for long. 12! Plus three is 15 points of damage. 15 points of damage. And I'm going to use one, my last stamina point

of the fight to add another d8, which is seven. Nice, heavy hit. The axe, as you swing wide, it doesn't cut through, but it sinks about four or five inches into this creature's chest armor. It grabs the axe on both sides of its clawed hands and shoves it back. You almost get thrown off balance, but then hold yourself there.

And I'm going to use my bonus action to cast hardened armor on myself to prep for the hit that's going to come. You got it. Smart. Okay, that finishes your go. Slaughter, you're up. Yes, I, Slaughter Grimm,

will run up to Tavima and skull me! I will take this gigantic skull and try to set it on fire with my necrotic mind and throw it at the bad guy. Okay, okay. Please work. First.

The skull. Ignites with deeply dark burning arcane fire. All right, go ahead and roll to attack with it. Let's go! It's big, right? I do. So I'll do a little hammer toss thing. And I'll toss it. 13.

13 hits. Wait. I'm sorry, it does not. Wow. Oh! I read the wrong stat. I was just saying it. Oh god. I can't hit shit with my skull!

I know, I know. I thought about just tapping things with it. Maybe I should just tap it with my skull. I'm a bad thrower. As you swing and go wide. Whoa! You are completely off course. It just goes off and skitters into the corner.

Okay. Well, I'll... I still clap. Thank you. All right, well, okay. That's my move. All right, that brings us to the Daedroth's turn, which it does not give its fire breath back.

No. Oh wait, no, that one died. There's two of them. I know, but it does not get its fire breath back. No! Oh wait, no, that one died. There's two of them. I know, but did that one use its fire breath? The second one? No, you're right. Thank you for the reminder. To that point, it's going to have its fire breath and it's going to

which is going to catch you and you in the same column in front. I need you both to make dexterity saving throws for me, please. 10? That's a fail. 11? You both take eight points of fire damage. Yikes.

Feeling singed, burned, cauterized. I just pad out the fire on him. There you go. Badass, awesome. And with that, it's going to go ahead and begin to stomp around the sight of you. Since I had you both in a calm, it's now going to try and get both of you in the fray to give you less opportunities

to engage elsewhere in the battlefield. That finishes its turn. Mallory, you're up. I am going to use my bonus action to use Dark Exchange to get a magicka back. Oh, nice. Nice. And I'm going to, actually, I don't even have to do that.

I'm going to hold off. I don't need that yet. I'm just going to try another lightning splash. Sure. All right. So for that. Lightning splash. That is a 13. Ha ha! No, that hits. Go ahead and roll damage. That's 11 points of lightning damage.

Great. So as it's storming around, skidding in the fray with Tavima and Grelnok, there's this flash of light and this cycling blast of electrical energy that shocks the creature. You see its muscles tense up before it shakes to try and shrug off the pain and stun sensation across its body.

Yeah, took a heavy hit. I'm then going to try and shift so that I'm out of any... Yeah, you're fine. So I won't... Yeah, I'll shift to just stay out of any straight lines with anybody else. Just to get surrounded. Okay, finishing that. It's back up to Tavima's turn.

Okay. I would like to back up a little bit. This is a very nice sword, but hold on. And I want to cast Sunfire on it as I drop the shield, get a free hand, and just, yeah, bright, light, let's do that. You got it. All right. So go ahead and make spell attack against the target.

19. 19 hits. Sweet. 16 points. Woo! Of fire damage. Nice, 16 points of fire damage. 16 points of fire damage. Nice, 16 points of fire damage to it. All right, it's looking pretty hurt. Cool.

Starting to feel some real wear and tear. Yeah, we burned the last magicka. I'm going to cast Backlash again on this one. Okay, you got it. So a DC 15 con save. Come on. Does not make it with a a DC 15 con save. Come on. Does not make it with a seven. Yes! Okay.

Another eight points of fire damage. Oh! You got it. All righty. It's now burning and charring. The backlash is now searing into it. It's now doomed by the perpetual spread of divine, almost light that's burning into its flesh. It's angry and it looks like it's starting to turn

even more feral than it may have been before. Why are you still alive? Don't take my shit. Okay. Are you right next to it or did you back up? I backed up a little bit. Okay. Okay, finishing your go. Hoa, you're up.

I'm going to stay where I am and heal for, oh, that's eight, nice, nice, nice. But while I'm, because I can just stand there, I don't have to do anything to heal. My mushrooms are active, if I'm around, if anyone wants to join me. Boy, aren't they. And I am going to go ahead and activate my swarm again,

because they're still there. You got it. And that is four DC 14 constitution saving throw first. That unfortunately does succeed with a natural 16. Oh no, and they still take half though. Indeed, so you got a little damage. Four, D, six, here we go. Five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 total divided by two is seven-ish.

Seven points of fire damage to us. The insects begin biting around it and you watch little sparks sparking off it as they're impacting and carving through. Sweeping in the air. Yeah, go, little buggies, go! You can do it, I believe in you. Awesome, finishing your turn?

Yes. All right, Grelnok, you're up with Slaughter on Deck. Come on, Grelnok. Grelnok! Yeah, whatever. I'll swing with that, Lex. Go for it, roll for an attack. Please finish him.

17. 17 hits. Let's go, roll for attack. Please finish him. 17. 17 hits. Let's go, let's go, let's go. Nine points of damage. Nine points of damage. How do you want to do this? Yes! I'm going to just rage out and swing and,

oh, you already chopped one's head off. I'm going to chop rage out and swing and, oh, you already chopped one's head off. I'm going to chop the other head off! Teamwork! Skulls for the skull god! I need the skulls! As you swing past, it takes two hits. The first one carves through partway into the throat, its eyes go wide. Flip the axe and swing back the other way.

The head spins and slops onto the ground. The body falls forward and ends up slumping against the other corpse. The other head rolling, coming to a stop on the opposite end. Nice. Nice. It's everything I've tried to not do in my life! Well, you're still not doing it.

Oh! Good. Oh, thank goodness. You and it. Oh! Burn! Oh, thank goodness. Okay. I'm still pure. Thank you. I don't think I can carry all these skulls.

I know when I, the two corpses that are resting against the walls, I just snap their heads off and hand them to you. Yeah! Oh, I take some of the fabric, and I make a big rope so that you can weave the rope through the eye holes of the skulls and you carry it like a sling on your back.

Ooh, I like it. I'll spend some time working on that little skull sling. You get two more rounds of healing. About to say, how many more rounds of healing do you need? I get one more. I'm fully healed, so if anyone wants to jump in, they can do, they can do. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah!

Well, it can only do up to 20 total healing, so you can do five more healing. If you could do it, go ahead. No, I got this. Are you sure? No, 100%. Okay. I'll go sit. Let me roll it for you just in case it doesn't come out as that.

No, three, so there's two more left, if you want to jump in. Yeah, I'll take it. All right, go for it. Thank you. I'll roll it and then it's probably, Whoa, 14? Yeah, it says eight, but you get two. All righty. Mushrooms disappear.

Can I just look at this sword and just see if I see anything unusual about it, other than its color? Make an investigation check. Investigation check. Mallory, how does the crystal work? Well, it's done now. It's just one hit.

It's one good hit. Okay, it was great. And yeah, it would have been great if it hadn't died, too, but yeah. I wasn't very helpful on that. You did great. It was lightning. It was great. Yeah! It was lightning.

There's so much lightning. The flies. Why don't we take a bit of that crocodile? I'm kind of curious what it would taste like. There's a whole tail. Fill it up with... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I'm just what it would taste like. There's a whole tail. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I'm just going to go in it. Oh, it looks delicious.

Okay, I think I can do something. You start carving some meat off of it. Magicka, stamina restored. Oh, wow. Yeah, Magicka, stamina. That's great, I love this. At the end of every battle, your stamina and magicka come back, but it's just a short-term burn use.

It's great, it lets you feel like you can really go all out every battle, which is pretty cool. Yeah, that is nice. Uh-huh. So yeah, so looking at the sword that you found, from your quick glance at one of the bodies, the texture and pattern on it, you've heard of this material.

It is Ura Chalk, so it's an Ura Chalk sword. It is a flexible, powerful metal that is used in blacksmithing and forging. And it'd probably be a pretty decent longsword for anyone with a martial interest in using one. Can I use it? It says I have a maul, but I don't know. You could use it if you want to.

I'll take it. Okay. For all intents and purposes, it's considered a longsword plus two in this game. Okay. So plus two to hit, plus two to damage. Can I search the headless bodies and see what they have in their pockets?

Sure, make an investigation check. I'll assist on that. Nice. Okay. There's a lot of blood all over the bodies now. I specifically didn't roll my own because I wanted you to roll both, so. Well. With advantage,

that came to a six. It's everything I wanted. Both of these Daedric creatures, these Daedric beasts, do not have pockets? Oh, I didn't mean those. I meant the, oh, you know what? All four bodies in here are headless now,

so I see the misunderstanding. I see. Amazing! That's where I got the idea from. I didn't realize it at the beginning. With a six, you searched the bigger creatures. I like it. Yeah. Nooks and crannies, pretty bloody. Not a lot of things to find on them,

but there's some decent meat you could probably, if it's cookable, edible, you don't know. You'll find out the hard way. That could be harvested or salvaged. If anyone needs extra healing, I could summon forth more mushrooms, if you would like. Sure. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah.

Sure, yes, absolutely. I am hurt pretty bad. I burn another magic heart. Oh, sure. Yeah. Yeah. Sure, yes, absolutely. I am hurt pretty bad. I burn another magic card. Oh, yeah. I'm going to go up. Fungal growth is once per short rest, if you like. Oh, is it? Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I can heal a little bit as well, if you need it. I mean, I can heal, too. I was just, if you were offering a free mushroom party, like, I was going to. I'm all out of mushroom themes. I can't put any more out. I put my hand on my chest, I was going to say that later. I'm all out of mushroom themes. I can't put any more out. I put my hand on my chest

and a little rune begins to glow red and gold on my skin. And I'm going to cast Rune Focus on myself. All righty. And heal some D4s. Okay, and it says the next attack on me has disadvantage. Does that carry through just till the next time something attacks me? Yeah. Tight! Shred it right in. Cool. We'll say till the next time something attacks me? Yeah. Tight!

Shred it right in. Cool. We'll say until the next short rest, essentially. The point's back. 22. Well, should we investigate the other bodies? You can if you'd like to. Did you just do one of them? I just did the big crocodile bodies. I haven't done the little human bodies yet.

Well, you found a cool. I found a cool sword on one. I can go and just, well, I already investigated swords. So if someone else investigates those bodies. I'll take a round. I'll give you help. No, it's all you. I'm good. Bro, it's tearing you apart. All of us are telling you you can do this. Look at the body, look at the body.

Little cheer squad over here. Check the pockets. 15. Hey. 15. Okay. You do find, upon the other body and the scattered bits of debris around it, a heavy axe that is made of similar, if not the exact same metal as that longsword,

or chalcum. Nice. And the... Beautiful. So it does act as a plus two battle axe for anybody who'd want to utilize that. I don't need this. I'm just going to throw it over my head. Oh my god, no, no, no!

I'm going to go grab it and break it over to you. Is that better than what I have? What do you use? You use a battleaxe? Battleaxe? Yeah, I mean, the same rolls you have, just add plus two to hit and damage. Hmm. No. Nope. Tight.

You also find a potion of health. Nice. Super, super flash. a quick bonus action, 2d4 plus two healing to whoever uses it. And a mostly burned journal. Oh, I'm okay now. A mostly burned journal. A burned journal.

Who here can read? Is that a better name? That's not good. Is that a better name for our restaurant? The burned journal? The burned journal? Oh, it has a lot of jury jug. The jury jug and the Burn Journal. Many items are in our taverns. That would make sense.

You can convert it into a thrift store. I mean, I'm putting it on the list. Burn Journal. I'm going to open up this Burn Journal. Okay. It is briefly browse it. Briefly browse the Burn Journal? Beneath the jury jug.

Jury burn journal. Rolls right off the tongue. It is heavily damaged, but skimming through, you find references to a veil between Nier and Oblivion that has been laid thin and traversable. Other entries speak of Daedric powers bleeding through. And deeper still, a passage reads, to keep the power of the ambitions is paramount.

Such weapons of annihilation are key. After hearing that, I remind everyone that Nirn is the planet that we live on. Thank you. It's very hard to remember. Maybe the planet you're living on right now, but. Yeah. This sounds a lot bigger than what I thought we were getting into.

Like difficult to carry kind of thing, I don't know. What did you think we were getting into? I don't know, if we were going to find something that was worth a lot of money or something. Yeah, and give it to that guy. Yeah, that one. This sounds like it's worth a lot of money, I don't know. Oh were going to find something that was worth a lot of money or something. Yeah, and give it to that guy. Yeah, that one. This sounds like it's worth a lot of money. I don't know.

Oh, we sell the journal. Does the burn journal say which door we should go into to find this thing? Ooh. Does it say? Well, why us? No, it's mostly just recipes after that. Behind the north door was?

Probably more creatures to deal with. Many small ones, so maybe skip that one for now and come back to it if it's important later. Okay. Sure. Unless that's where? Let's check the other doors. Yeah, let's check the other doors.

Okay. So we have the east door and the south door. Those are the ones that do not have that living essence in essence. Okay. Are they locked? Which one would you like to try? I would like to go over and just look at the east door.

Sure. Go ahead and make an investigation check. One thing you do notice in the east door as you approach is there is a symbol intricately painted on the door that appears to be a fiery rising sun. Are there similar symbols on the other doors? Not from what you can see. Make a history or religion check.

Your trouble at both? Eight. Eight. You have no idea. Cool. I'll check the doorknob, if there is such a doorknob. The door is closed, but it is not locked. Get a skull ready. if there is such a doorknob? The door is closed, but it is not locked. Eh? Yeah. Get a skull ready.

Oh yeah. Do you want to just use the big one real quick? You don't have to undo the other ones. Got a whole bunch of them here. I like that you're just pulling the scarf and they're just staying back there. Yeah, they are. I'll try the other way.

You can use the sword to fling the skull. I'll just open the door with my hand. Yay. Okay. You go ahead and open the door. And immediately, as you look within, it is a metallic set of dark metal stairs that descend in a tight spiral, like a spiral staircase out of sight. The walls themselves have occasional carved columns

in the sides of a similar Daedric architectural design. You also notice from above the door, suddenly, a purplish fume fills the space where you stand. Anybody who would have been within five feet of our good friend here? I will use my reaction to cast Bone Shield on myself. Awesome.

The bones get in front of your way, and the toxic- I use the skull. The toxic fume front of your way and the toxic fume suffuses the porous bone you hold before you. I need you to go ahead and make a constitution saving throw. Sure. Not good. Like five, six. Five, six.

You begin to cough heavily. As the poisonous gas fills your lungs, you take six points of poison damage. But Bone Shield gives me six temporary hit points. Ooh! That's true. Yeah! So. Wow. As you hold it upward,

the Bone Shield itself, as it swirls around you, actually closes off possible air passages. And as such, the fumes disperse. A literal bonus. With no poison damage, I'll say you also are not poisoned, as from the trap would normally do. Tavima is so proud of you and this excellent shield work. You shielded against air!

With a dead head! That's great! Thank you, thank you. Defensive necromancy. You know, servers have to be, they have to think on their feet. They have to be aware of their surroundings. They have to be ready to deal with any sort of crisis

that comes, and this was just an example of that. You know, if we're thinking about theming our restaurant, you should really use your bone shield as a serving platter to help add to the ambience. Ooh, I like it. I could even throw dishes at our customers on skulls. We can serve fajitas and you can set it on fire before you throw it.

Oh! That's great! I love it! I have my fajita. Baked Alaska, can we do that? Mm. Todd. So Todd. Bananas pop. Can we do that? Todd. So Todd. Banana spot. It's a dessert.

Okay. Well, this staircase seems like the actual way we're supposed to go. Feels like it. There's this whole other room right here, though. I know, we should check the other door to see if there's gold in there. I don't want to check it.

Leif's going to check for cash. You guys check. Make an investigation check. Oh yeah, that'll do it. Eight. Oop. Okay. So, an eight.

And it's been a great show, everyone. So as you approach and look carefully, Nott doesn't appear to be trapped. And as you lean back on your other foot to tell your friends, the piece of stone that was at the front of the door gives a little bit. The weight shifts and you hear a.

As you look back. I jump. Oh god. You glance up just in time. You see this cylindrical shape in the ceiling get larger and larger and larger. The rest of you watch as a stone cylinder and the roof just drops. I need you to make a dexterity saving throw.

No, no, no, no, no, no! You just get squished right now and that's the end. You come back from being squished. Dexterity save? Yes, please. You're in potion. Do I have one of those? I kind of do. Oh no. Eight're in potion. Do I have one of those? I kind of do. Oh no.

Eight. Again. Oh no! Oh my. You take 15 points of bludgeoning damage and are restrained. Because there's a drink in here. Because I'm stuck by my full stack. You watch this go.

And you just see, like, full on Wile E. Coyote, arms and legs akimbo. Oh no! And for a moment, there's no movement. Both of you make strength checks, please. Oh no. Oh no! I rolled a one.

Oh no! Could it be an athletics check? What? No, this is not an athletic perpetual thing. This is a singular feat of strength. Yeah, eight. One of them eight. You take an additional four points of bludgeoning damage

as it's continuing to crush you. Oh no! Okay. Oh god, we're doing bad! I'm going to use Dark Exchange really quickly. Okay. And give myself a little bit of healing, because oh god.

I will cast Spirit Mender on him using three magicka. And I will harness my dark powers to cast this healing. It's 1d4 plus one per round. And then I'm going to use my action to cast Power Surge. Not Power Surge, I'm sorry, Force Shock. this healing, it's 1d4 plus one per round. And then I'm going to use my action to cast Power Surge. Not Power Surge, I'm sorry, Force Shock. Oh, that's good. You got three points.

Ooh, thank you. Of healing. So I'm going to cast Force Shock on this thing. Everything is hard to say. Yeah, go ahead and roll damage on that one. The North Door. Force Shock to North Shore. All right, please roll high. That's okay.

That's 11 points of force damage. Okay, I'll say, as you're trying to pull from underneath, you rush forward and go ahead and summon this dark spirit, this ghastly wraith appears, and for a second, your mind goes like, oh god, it's going to take his soul, but it reaches out and touches the hand, and you feel a little bit of strength return to you,

so you heal 1d4 plus one. Yeah. Yeah, then you have your thing. Three points, yeah. And then you push off with this blast of force, and the cylinder flies off, and goes arcing through the air. I need you to make a dexterity saving throw.

Oh noes! With advantage, because you do see it coming. Well, okay, that's a four. And that's another four! Oh, gross! My dexterity is one. I got a five, y'all, total. You take four points of bludgeoning damage. It just nicks you. It's not the full impact.

It doesn't restrain you, but it does clip you and you like, oh, grab your shoulder as it slams into the back wall, cracking it and coming to rest there as dust begins to settle a bit. We're doing great. Okay, maybe check for trap, mate. Checking for traps is good. Well, that was the trap,

so I feel like the door is good now. Just checking for it. Yeah. You good, Mallory? I'm not okay. You get two more rounds of healing from me. So that's another three points, and another three points. I mean, were you holding a-

That's 11 total, I think? It was nine total. Nine total, so all right. I think I'm at, I think that brings me back up to 18. The math, I got a little, I'm pretty sure I'm at 18 after that. I'll trust you.

Is 18 your full? No, it's close, though. Okay. I'm going to step over Mallory's body and push the door open. You've got that potion, bud. I'm just letting you know. I know. I'm fine for now.

You're okay. The door opens and it is a gradual decline, tight tunnel that continues on downward before evening out about 100 feet or so below. There's another fucking pathway. Always. Which way do we go? Can you send a bug or something to see where to go?

No, I can't see what they're seeing. I just, they do what see what they're seeing. I just, they do what I tell them to do. It's a little different than that. I can go down and look if you want with my darkvision. Hold, you just got hit by the pillar we all saw, so no, not on your own. Okay, well, we could all go down together.

Which one do we want to do? My door had a fire symbol on it, which is cool. Want to do that part? But then we just, Mallory almost died opening this one. I feel like we should probably do this one. I'm genuinely not invested. If anybody's worried, I'm not invested.

I feel like we have to honor the sacrifice. Don't honor me. Don't. Well, it has blood on it. So anyone coming through will know we marked the door, at least. Well, it has blood on it. So anyone coming through will know we marked the door, at least. That's true. Yeah. I'm fine, just...

What about the third door, though? The one with the living things behind it? I could take care of them if you want, but these two doors are already kind of open, so. What if there's gold behind that door? Okay, I'll take care of it. No, no, no, no. Hold on, I have an idea. We're going to pick from one of these two doors.

We don't need the third door. Oh, wait, are we sure? We voted for Smush Door. Smush Door? Yeah. I'm Team Fire Door, but we got one vote for each. Smush Door, Fire Door, what else we got? Gold Door. Okay, so you're going to get one vote each

for three of the doors. Yeah, all right. I choose the sun door, because it looks very pretty. What's the sun door? What's the sun door? The fire door. The fire door, okay. It was a fiery sun to be honest. I thought there was a fourth door. I was going to take a hostage. I will admit, I want to see the cylinder door.

Yeah! All right, so we have a tie now. Tie. It's the gold door then, right? Because I'm the only one that's got the odd vote. How about you try and open the gold door and we see what happens? So you have to pick between the other two. I say you try and open the gold door and see what happens.

Okay, I actually like that. All right, I'll go over and look for traps. Oh god! Make an investigation check. Wait, is the gold door the north door? Yes. Ah, god. Investigation 15. 15. Does not appear to be trapped.

It looks like there is a slight gap that it's not locked, but it is wedged or it is caught in some way. It might be pulled open forcefully, but there's a slight gap in the door. You can just a little bit. Can I hear any creatures right behind it? Make a perception check. Perception, huh?

Seven. Seven. You hear occasional, like... All right, all right, all right. I got an idea. You pull open the door. And I'll just sit over to the side. Actually, I... No, no, no, no.

Honestly, I got the idea. I got the idea, then I realized you were the dad. How did you come up with that? No. Did you guys work on that? We've been working on this teamwork for a while. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can sit a trip, too. You have a draw,

and I'm going to get ready to cast Stone Fist as soon as the door opens. Doesn't Stone Fist just protect you from stuff coming? No, no, no, no, no. No, that's hardened armor, baby. No, it's cool. Like, I feel like. But I'm afraid you're going to take some damage from a Stone F no, no, no, that's hardened armor, baby. No, it's cool. Like, I feel like. But I'm afraid you're going to take some damage

from the stone fist. No, we're good. I'm into it. Can I ready a spell as I open the door or nah? Yeah, I won't. And it's the same. And as soon as the door comes open, I'm going to get ready to slam my battle ax down onto the ground.

I'm readying a spell. If whoever's pulling the door open, that's your action. You wouldn't be able to ready something for that, but anybody else could ready it. I'm not readying anything and I'm opening it anyway. Here we go. All right. Go ahead and make a strength check for me, please.

Yay. Can it be athletics, please? Sure. Thanks, 15. 15. Pop! Oh, something in the shoulder popped. Oh! Oh, no!

Oh, that's super wedged. Super wedged. You felt it move a little bit. You were super close. I warmed it up. Like one off, and pops back in. Oh.

That's fresh. Okay. I'm going to need a second. Just give her a little. Yeah, thank you, thank you. On the back. The heavy shifting, you hear this little sound come through the crack. Sounds like rats, spiders.

It's not bad. Yes, if you want, I could set a trap in front of the door from this side, and then when we open the door, if they come rushing out, they'll get caught in that trap. That's a great idea. But we do have to figure out how to open the door without crossing the trap.

Okay, what if you ready the spell, I open the door, you set the trap. Okay, let's try that one. Okay. Do you want to open it? Should we try together? We'll watch your shoulder. We're going to help together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll try together. All right, so you're getting your trap ready?

All right, it's ready. So I'll breathe in and get into your wedding dress. Good drama. Good drama. It's called Barb Trap and it's ready now. All right, so you've got yourself prepped. Both of you make strength checks or one of you makes it with advantage, your choice. Now roll it with advantage, go, go, go.

Are you sure? I'm super sure. This ain't going to work unless it got better, because you're 13! It pulls an additional inch. An inch. Come on! But not fully open. This door sucks. You begin to see little snouts.

You begin trying to push through the crap. It is, you expect rats, but these are larger noses, and you see faint bits of a greenish glow as they peek through. I got a great idea. Okay. I'm just going to look inside. I'm not going to get super close. I'm just going to try and get a vantage,

and I'm going to cast Lightning Splash on the other side of the door. Yeah! Okay. That's good. Yeah, there is enough space there to fit a trap. Is this a castable situation? Just like, blip blip? I can put a 10-foot sphere 60 feet away. Get it! Yes!

All right, and you could probably fit a trap in there if you wanted to. Yes, I would like to do my barbed trap also. Okay. I'll let you. So it is a DC what for you? For me, it is a DC 13, dex saving. We are very good at being strong. Nope.

DC 14 for me. We kicked butt in the fight, though. Yes. We got some new skulls. And yes. And then for you, it's DC 14? Mm-hmm. Yes.

Yes. Yes. Nope. Nope. Wow, that's a full inverse on both points. All right, so go ahead and roll damage. I did. It's eight, and if they take damage, they also stop moving and are grappled until it breaks free. Nice! So as you chuck the trap in there,

it goes and sets off all these screams and screeches, right? This burst of energy from inside. Go ahead and roll damage for me. 14. All righty. I even have here this sudden, swirling cavalcade of screeches and screams. Yeah!

Scrambling. Silence. Yes. Yay! Nice. We opened it the exact right amount, and I'm proud of us. And I pushed my shoulder back into its socket one more time. I'm going to get a little closer to the crack.

Oh no, I'm right here, I'm so edible. Make a persuasion, or deception check. Your choice. He is edible. Because'm so edible. Ah! Make a persuasion or deception check. Your choice. He is edible. Because you are edible and you are very close. You can make a persuasion if you'd like. I'm not that edible. You'd have to really cook. I know where I've been.

Dealer's choice. 16. 16? I mean, somebody believed that, but no response. Yeah, the void does not believe it, though. Okay. I think we're good. Let's, uh. In the store. Yeah, the Void does not believe it, though. Okay. All right. I think we're good. Let's, uh. In this door.

Yeah. Let's, uh, axe maybe and. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, don't break the good axe. Hold on, we got this. One more. Yeah, we'll just brace our feet on the side. Yeah, just get on the side. And then get the extra. Big pull.

All right. I'm bad at tent feet. I'll throw a skull at it just to see if I can knock it. Go for it. All right. So go ahead and roll an attack and you guys go ahead and roll. I'm not going to light the skull on the side All right, so go ahead and roll an attack and you guys go ahead and roll. I'm not going to light the skull on fire. Can I roll with advantage on this one? Yes! Thank you.

Okay. There we go. 22. Yeah! 22. You go ahead and. It slams open. What'd you roll? 11. 11. You miss the door entirely. It goes into the room.

I need that skull! And. Shatters. The skull shatters in fire. But if it hits, I get it back. Correct, but you missed. So it shatters in the wall. Was that my skull or one of the ones? That doesn't matter, I got four left, I'm okay.

We can go get it, it's right there. No, it blows up, blew up. Maybe some of the rat skulls. Oh yeah, I'll use these little guys. And those are much easier to throw. Dude, what are these? It's like a kid at the museum keeps throwing their doll in inappropriate places

and then crying. Immediately, you can see from the flash of flame and the lanterns you're carrying with you, it is about a 15 by 15 foot storage chamber. You can see there's tumbled and rotten grains, long toppled water jugs that have since emptied and dried out, leaving this faint residue of long, stale water.

And you see what looks to be an armored and fresher, if mostly eaten, corpse that is propped up in the corner. Bones picked of flesh and elements of the armor torn open, and these rats apparently had eaten what remained within. Were they just normal rats? Looking upon their bodies, they are larger

and given this odd bone-like protrusions in their body, not dissimilar to the large crocodile beasts that you had fought, which, marking, make a religion or history check. Great at this. You got it. Natural one. So fresh. These are some creepy rats, dude. I'll try to pop off a little mini skull.

With a little work, you can. You can. There is one giant bleached skull that is mostly pulled of flesh that had been eaten off of it from the rats that is just going to. Oh, I'll go get that guy. Okay, you pop that off. Is there any emblem or anything on the armor that looks familiar?

The armor, you can see the armor is dark, grayish leather, but it is worn beneath what looks to be a set of reddish, deep crimson robes. Make an investigation check. Natural 20. Yeah. Amongst the tattered refuse, both rotted flesh and terrifying rat droppings,

you see a mask, a scarred, almost featureless gray mask with eye holes that is left there amongst the pile around this corpse. You also discover that beneath the armor, there is a nicely well-made silk robe. The armor was more ornamental over an actual thick robe, as well as a singular potion of health and stamina. Mm. Yes.

That when it heals you, or if you drink it, you gain 1d6 plus one hit points back and one stamina. Ooh. And because you rolled so high, an odd flat circular stone with an unfamiliar symbol carved into it. You can make a history or religion check if you'd like. 18?

18. Whoa. This is the letter Oht. O-H-T in the Daedric alphabet, and the symbol most commonly associated with the Void of Oblivion. Oh! Uh-oh. Hmm?

It's Oat. I remind Grelnok that we live on the planet Nier. This ain't good. Yes, I think it looks similar to the symbols I sort of saw on the outside of the large door. So this is probably a bad place to create a theme park escape room, maybe. Well, I don't know. The place used to be called the Dreary Jug. a bad place to create a theme park escape room, maybe. Ah, no, I feel the same. Well, I don't know. The place used to be called the Dreary Jug.

Maybe we call it the Oat Jugs, you know? No? No. I'm not writing that one down. Nope. I'm not going to. Fjallra, if you could, you make a history religion check, since you made the Daedric Connection earlier and with the stone in your hand

with what Grelnok has noted. That's a dirty 20. Hooray! The symbol, the fiery sun rising on the other door that was opened, there was something about it that was tickling your mind. You couldn't quite place it,

but now seeing the connection of the Daedric architecture, this stone to oblivion, the Daedric beast that you fought, that is known in places to be the emblem of Mehrunes Dagon, the Daedric Prince of Darkness and Destruction. Uh-oh. So there's a Prince of Darkness, and I think he or they rule over this place

or the people who visit here. So this is super bad news, but maybe there's still treasure. I don't know. How does this all, what does this mean for us and us just trying to find some money at this point? Feels like a better chance to find money. Do we want to? I'm taking the mask.

Okay. I'm taking this robe. I want those, yeah, okay. Yeah, sweet. Anybody? I'm taking the mask. Okay. I'm taking this robe. I want those. Yeah, okay. Yeah, sweet. Anybody? I'll take a look at that mask. Robes, robes. I mean, I do like, I like red. I throw the stone into the meat sack that I have. Into the meat sack? Okay. The deep, jerky sack.

Fish cheese in it. Those are considered spider silk robes, which are plus one to AC and saves. Ooh! What? And it's red, and you were just talking about how you hated your outfit before. Yeah! Yeah, I don't feel better. It's the ruffles, it's hard to pull doors open.

Yeah, this is great. It's a pretty woman montage. She's okay, can I keep these? They look okay? It looks very good. They look good, baby. Thank you. If possible, Matt, the sash is not working for me.

Instead, I'm going to take the skulls and try to jam them on all my spikes that are all over my body. See if I can make them stay. All right. Go ahead and make a dexterity check for me. Okay, come on. This is my roll.

10. It takes you a little bit. And a couple of points, your companions watch and figure you need a little help there. And it was more of a communal effort, but all together, you eventually, much like the friend at the Comic-Con Masquerade who needs a group to help him put his costume on,

together, you eventually have assembled the Skullmeister. Yes! Final form. I'm here to take your order. You're halfway to. You look friendly. Great. That's good. Great, all right.

So I'm trying on this mask. I'm seeing what it, if it has any, what it does, if it feels good. I don't know. I mean, it fits. It doesn't seem to have any sort of pertinent energy to it. Does it smell bad?

I mean, it smells pretty awful, but no different than the rest of the chamber that it was found in and the pile of refuse and filth that it was pulled from. Wait, does it smell in here? Yes. It's fine. We're fine. We're fine. Anything else in the room?

In any of the grain? Should always break the pots and the water jugs. You feel like you searched pretty thoroughly with that roll. Oh, that's right. So most everything else in here is rotted materials for whoever might've been the previous denizens of this subterranean chamber. Tight.

We still have the conundrum of the two other doors. Hotspot. Fiery door. Yeah, I changed my vote to hotspot. Okay. Okay. Now we know that symbol is connected with a stone in the Prince of Darkness, so we know where we're going.

Great, great. Okay. Oh no. Who will lead us? Where are you trekking? Into the door with the symbol on it. The east door. I'm feeling pretty. All righty.

I'm feeling splashy. I can do this. All right. I got it. Yeah. Okay. I'm going to open the door with the symbol on it. I'm feeling pretty. All righty. I'm feeling splashy. I can do that. I got it. Yeah. Okay. Open the door. Wait, can I check for transfers? No. Please? Make an investigation check. Oh god.

I think I already opened that. I already opened that door. Yeah. The door is open. Oh, it's already open. I still check. I get really nervous. Hey, double, triple check is never a bad thing. Yeah. Okay. 19.

19. Looking about, you can see there is definitely a trap mechanism for the doorframe that involves when the door is opened, if the weight clutch on top of the door is shifted out of the way, like your Necromancer friend did earlier. However, currently it is not reset

and requires manual resetting. So you feel pretty confident moving through right now would be fine. Okay. Awesome. I think we're good. Yeah. You got darkvision, right? No. We have torches, right?

Yeah. Yeah, we got a torch. Yeah. Yeah. I'll take rear. Oh. All right, so you're up front. Who else next? I'm up front. Oh, you're up front, sorry. Yeah. All right.

I'm in the back. You're in the back. Oh, so you said rear, got you. All right, so front. who's after Tavima? I'll go after. All right, so you have Tavima, Mallory, Hwa. And I'm just walking around like the kid in A Christmas Story.

In the Stay Puft Monday. Got it. Okay. Wonderful. Descending down this metallic spiral staircase, deeper and deeper below, the shadows that greet you beyond the torch and lantern light that you carry begin to shift away as sconces begin to appear, still slightly glowing of orange embers,

and a slight smell of smoke and charcoal begins to seep into the air. Tavima, as you're the first descending these stairs, weapon at the ready, you begin to hear sounds echoing from deep below. Sounds like the scraping of metal on metal. Occasionally a heavy echoing grunt and a shout. Door struggles, got it.

Deeper and deeper still, you travel 60, 80, 100 feet beneath as the noises get louder and louder. Ting, ting, ting, ting. Ah! No! No! No. I just hold the group like, let's see who wins, and we'll clean it up after.

It gets louder and louder to the point where you stop and you make a perception check for me. Oh no. Natural one. Natural one. Natural one. Probably quite a ways down below. Yeah. You can travel pretty far.

We're good, okay. We're feeling safe. So you guys all continue down and you turn one corner. You turn one corner and all of a sudden, Demi, you turn and you're just in a room. Like you're literally just stepping in the door. Oh, oh, there is this wide, wide chamber, this somewhat square-like structure.

No music. 70 feet across on each side, and it rises up like a reverse pyramid to an apex about 70 feet above you. You can see chains dangling, and that Daedric architecture itself begins to coalesce towards the top. In the middle of this, on a rise-stepped chamber,

you see four bodies strewn about, bloody and not moving, some burned and charred with smoke, still fresh off their corpses. You can see them all wearing similar robes as to the one you saw on the corpses that had been strewn about the previous chambers you've been to and the one that you're currently wearing. Masks tossed on the floor.

In the center of the room, you hear a voice shout, The time for ambitions is now! We come to prove ourselves! And you look up and see there is amongst, still standing in a similar garb to these other figures, but in heavier armor, a figure with a massive two-handed sword makes a giant swing, mask on their face,

towards a 12-foot humanoid bestial daedric monster with four massive muscular armored arms. And you can see it has this crest of multiple twisting horns off the top of its head, its red scaled body and toothy mouth open, screaming as they're both just trading blows. The figure streaks wide with a secondary hit, and you watch as it catches a blade in the shoulder

of the creature, roars and grabs both of this entity's arms and begins to pull, and the figure screams as the arms are torn from his sockets. With that, the body falls to the ground and is yelling in pain as it's trying to back away with its feet as the creature throws the arms to the side

and then stomps and smashes the head onto the stone. You're all like, what did I just step into? Turn around to the group like, this is not my place. As soon as you're saying that, behind, over the shoulder of Tavima, the creature goes.

Did it see us? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Everyone roll initiative for me. Oh! You can just turn around and close the door, right? Come on, come on, come on. Clear a door, I would just like to slowly. Yes! Woo!

This is going to be such a good restaurant, you guys. What does this thing do again? Just reminder on the ropes. Plus one to AC. Plus one to AC and plus one to all saving throws. Cool, perfect. That's great. Love that. All righty. So, 25 to 20. 21.

Oh, look at that, Mallory up top, all righty. 20 to 15. 15 to 10. 12. Okay. Oh my god. Oh boy. All righty, 10 to five. Six.

Five. Tavima. Sir? And then what? And I have four. Oh buddy. Slaughter. All righty.

Top of the round, as an immediate reaction, as you're all staring at this climactic battle happening in the bottom of this subterranean chamber, still barely piecing together what any of this may or might mean, in search of coin, you found yourself pulled into something maybe a bit beyond what you had expected, but nevertheless, here you are,

the being noticing your presence. And up top is Mallory. What are you doing? With Grollnok on deck. I feel like this is somebody else's business, but oh boy. This is not what we needed. I'm going to start with a lightning splash right in the center of this thing.

Okay. That's a DC 14. 14, that's a failure. That's a... Come on. Ah, 11 points of lightning damage. 11 points of lightning damage, nice. It's like.

He gets his forearms out, flexed angrily, at the clawed fingertips, and then suddenly the sphere bursts with energy, arcing through its body. . Oh god. I understand that. I'm going to back up.

Up into the stairs a bit? Yeah, as I do, I'm tapping your sword again to give you Crystal Weapon. Thank you, thank you. Use that quickly is what I'd recommend. Okay, nice. Grelnok, you're up. Uh-huh, how far away is this creature?

From you right now, about 45 feet. Okay. 40 feet, I'd say. 40 feet, all right. I'm going to... Get in there. I'm going to run forward 20 feet. Okay.

And I'm going to swing out my molten whip and try to and whip the creature and snag it. Slick, all right. Because it's up higher than us, right? It is a little bit of an erased platform, about maybe five or six feet above. Yeah, so maybe if I can whip it

and try to yank it down the hill, it'll take some damage. Go for it, go ahead and roll for your attack on that. Is that spell attack? That's a spell, I think, yes. Nine? You throw the whip out, and at first you think it strikes, but instead it wraps it around one of its wide arms.

The flame's licking the side of its forearm and just goes. And you see it about to pull you forward. I just let go of the whip. You let go and with that, the Molten Whip just de-apparates. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's all right. That's all right.

Okay, that's an action for my bonus action. Mm-hmm. What's all right. Okay, that's an action for my bonus action. Mm-hmm. What other weapon will you give? To... The creature. How do you feel? Fish and whips. I'm going to use my, oh god.

Well, you know, I'm going to use my last magicka point and cast Hardened Armor on myself, just in case it comes running at me. Good call, you know, I'm going to use my last magicka point and cast hardened armor on myself, just in case it comes running at me. Good call, you got it. All righty. So that finishes up your turn, Garnac. It is now the Ruinogmon's turn. Ooh, hey, look at you.

You're 20 feet ahead of the rest of the group. Yes, I am. And you back up the stairs. Mm-hmm. It moves forward about 30, no, about 15 feet. 20 feet gets right up into your space. And as it's stepping, its two lower arms begin to swirl around. And as it does, you see flames beginning to curl

and summon and Hwaa! What? Why? Tavima and Slaughter. Oh no. The ground beneath you begins to get extremely warm. As you glance down, you can see the stone and marble beneath you beginning to burn bright orange before

a column of burning fire suddenly just swirls around you. I need the three of you to make dexterity saving throws for me, please. Our only crime is being slow. Am I allowed to bone shield myself? As a? Reaction? Yeah, you would. Okay.

I'll bone shield myself. Go for it. But I will also roll, ooh, a 20. Okay. On my saving throw. Okay, so you take half damage on that. So you would take four points of fire damage. But I just, I got seven temporary hit points. You have three more.

I rolled a 10. A 10, so you take eight points of fire damage. Mm-hmm, 12. Eight points of fire damage to you. Well, now I can get over here. You're all feeling a little singed there in a brief moment. And as it stands now, the flames

pulled upward in front of you. It still heats near your face with the proximity of Grelnok. The creature now glancing over top of you to the friends, now looking singed and burned. It chuckles and looks down towards you. You can see just rows and rows of spiky teeth in its open jaw.

That finishes Itsuko, which brings it to Tavima. Really? With Fjord on deck. Oh, okay. Yeah, shoot. Do I have a sense of, is fire not going to mess with this thing that much? You do not know. It seems to be able to summon fire,

but your experience in the world is things that use fire doesn't necessarily always mean that they're... Honestly, Sam, I am a burned proof of that. Okay, we'll start with a backlash. So DC 15 con save. You got it. That is a failure at 13.

Yes, beautiful, beautiful. For three points of fire damage. Three points of fire damage. Hate to see it. The light, as opposed to the deep red flames that it summoned, this is a bright solar flare-like fire that burns and sears,

and as it does, you can see it settling on its shoulders like a faint arcane mantle, and you see its eyes re of reeling from it. Okay. And then, yeah, let's hit it with Sunfire while we're here. You got it. Cool. Okay, please, please, please, please, please, please. No. 14?

14 is exactly your class. Nice. He's a big dude. He's a big dude. All right, all right, all right. 13 points of fire damage. 13 points of fire damage. And is there any other enemy? No, no, no, because it ran forward.

Are there any of the other red-robed guys within five feet? Red robe, red robe, red robe. They are all unconscious or dead. I mean, I did say what I said. Are there guys within five feet. Red robe, red robe, red robe. They are all unconscious or dead. I mean, I did say what I said. Are there any within five feet? See, yeah, there's one right behind him that he stepped over. Yeah, I'm just going to hit it

with a d6 to damage, just like, I don't. Sure, yeah, go for it. Six points. Six points. The body is just in flames. Cinders. All right. Nice. I feel good about that. Sure. I'm dead. You goters. All right. Nice. I feel good about that. Sure.

I'm done. You got it. All right, Hwa, you're up. Slaughter, you're on deck. Oh no. Whoever is near me, I want to do a 10-foot sphere of frost cloak. So who can be near me right now?

Right now, Tavima's near you, because Tavima hasn't moved from the spot previously, and Slaughter's near you. The other two members have darted off a bit. All right. Everyone just, as the humans say, stay cool. I wrap my arms in a big motion, and frost comes from my fingers,

and a cloak of frost wraps around you, giving you a plus one to your AC, and also you're resistant to cold damage, which doesn't do a lot of good. However, Things can get weird. The frost stays on you and every time you are hit by a melee type of enemy,

you do three cold damage to them automatically. Oh, nice. Nice. Beautiful. It lasts for 10 minutes. Hell yeah. And I think I, should I move away from the lava land?

Is there a safe looking spot that's not near the monster and not near lava place where we're staying? You can either back up the stairs with Mallory, or you could head to the side of the chamber and flank off to the side. You have enough room where you'd be able to move into the chamber and still stay within eyeshot.

I'll do that. But out of the battle. So I can cast later. Okay, so you charge and dart off to the side, and you're now on the right-hand side of this large square chamber. You got it. All right, finishing Hwasa's turn. Slaughter, you're up. I'll angle left, move a little bit.

I'll pull a skull off of my body. All right. I think I've been, you know what, I've been untrue to myself. I've been using my necrotic powers to fuel these flaming skulls, but I haven't been using the greatest power of all, the power of the waiter. So I will yell into the skull,

one stack of Vermont dry stack, Adam and Eve on a raft, four on two over easy, fire that order! And I'll throw the skull. It's so stupid. Go for it. He's just been over watch. Natural one! No!

Oh my god! No! No! Sam! Sam would be regal. No! I'm in a second. Oh my god!

Oh no! You throw the skull, and as it leaves your fingers, the creature is currently focused on Grelnok, and you see, oh, it's heading right for it. Yes. One of its side arms just catches the skull in midair and it and just crushes it into skull dust in its fist. That's your action.

So sorry. I have not much left. I don't really, nope, that's it. I can infuse my weapon with healing powers, but I don't hit anything, so it won't really help. Okay. That's it. All right, Sloth is done. Mallory, you're up with Grelnok on deck.

I'm going to step forward a bit so I can get another good view, and I'm going to do what I did last time with Lightning Splash. You got it. Except I'm going to add a Power Surge. Oh. That would be, it's a dexterity, you said?

Yes. It's a 12. Oh, yeah. So let's see what we can do. That's okay. 13 points of lightning damage. 13 points of lightning damage. As it's crushing the skull in its fist,

and it's gloating a bit in your direction, the blast hits it on the other side. It. You can see it's getting frustrated and angry and swinging its fists about. You're having to dart back The blast hits it on the other side. It... You can see it's getting frustrated and angry and swinging its fists about. You're having... I'm not going to dart back to not be slammed

as they're swirling around. Is there any cover to be had, or is there no cover to be had? You can move in, do that, and then move back out if you'd like. Just a step. I have a plan for next round. You're just going to step to the side.

You still have a little bit of a view. You have half cover. How are you doing? Oh, I'm a nine out of 21. How far away? She's about 25 feet from you. Could I make it, do you think, or no? If you don't move back, you could probably get to her.

I'm going to make that run and hand off a potion. Actually, I have bonus action. Can I use a potion on someone else for a bonus? It's an action to use it on somebody else. So handing off. It's a bonus action for them to use it. What if he opens the bottle, throws it, and I open my mouth?

We can do that, but that's a check. Oh, no, never mind, just give it to me. I'm totally open for trying it. Yeah! There you go. We've not been rolling well. Why not turn this into a 90s Gatorade commercial? Let's do this.

Yeah, all right, that's a bonus action. So now you are both out in the open on the right-hand side of this chamber. And that ends your turn, Mallory? Yeah, if I can step away, I will, but if not, I'm just going to. No, it takes your full movement to get up to here to pass that off.

All right, so that finishes your go. Grelnok, you're up. Let's go. All right. God, I'm going to. Come on. I'm going to just swipe down with a venomous claw. That's my bonus action. You got it, go for it, roll. That would be...

15? 15 hits. Oh, good, good. Ooh, that's nice. 14 plus six is 20 points, plus three. 23 points of poison damage. You strike down the front of its armored chest and the armor breaks a bit. Some of the chains go free dangling.

And in that thick, reddish-orange armored hide across its torso, there's this series of black gash marks that begin to just seep this dark, purplish-black ichor from within it. Drip down. I'm going to take my battle axe and slam it into the gash. Go for it.

Damn it, Laura! That would be 25. That hits. And I'm going to spend a stamina point, another stamina point, and get an extra d8 damage on that. You got it. So that's nine plus seven.

16 points. 16 points of damage. So after striking downward, it reels back, takes a step onto its back leg to catch itself, and with that, you use that opening and jam it down, and the axe only sinks maybe an inch or two into the chest at the first impact, and then you just push forward into it

and sink it another inch, and it yells out in pain from the impact. You're starting to see some wear and tear on this being. Okay, okay. Nice. I'm going to wipe my mouth. Ooh. And say, yeah. All righty. I don't know what I do.

I'm just behind you. Yeah! That finishes your turn? Yeah! Okay. With my axe in it! The Axe Gash. What do you think for a restaurant name? Oh! I put that, I write that down.

I go, write it down! You watch as it now reaches behind its back with one hand and almost pulled from the ether, a longsword emerges in one hand, and it's going to go ahead to make a longsword strike and three claw strikes against you. Oh shit. Oh! I should have gotten up there, I'm sorry.

Oh. Oops, I cocked. I'm resistant to all of these. That's good to know. Ooh! Well, the first is a 21 to hit with a longsword. Hits. Don't forget about the plus one from... From what? From what? From Hwa?

Oh, yeah, Hwa. I don't think you were in the area. I was in the area. But any hit that I take does get a d4 plus one force damage because of my hardened armor. Darn. That's right. Hardened armor. So that is seven points of slashing damage

for the longsword. Okay. Which you said is halved? Halved. To three. Okay. That's great. That's the first d4 you get, so. Oh, and then a d4. Ooh, four plus one is five damage to it. Let's go.

That's a natural 20. Two blinks, sir. With one of its claw strikes. Ooh. 14 points of slashing damage reduced to seven. Okay. And another d4. Minus two. And then another four points of force damage.

Whoa! Love it. Four points of force damage. That is going to be 17 to hit. 17 armor class. No! Dang, wish I had the thing. Dang it! Eight points of slashing damage reduced to four. Last hit.

Wait, wait, wait. Five points of force damage. Yeah! Force damage. Oh my god. And that's going to be 18 to hit. Okay, shit. That's going to be six points of slashing damage reduced to three. Okay, shit. That's going to be six points of slashing damage reduced to three. Okay. What are you doing?

What are you doing, buddy? You up? That was a lot. Two points of force damage to it. You got it. I'm still up, but I'm hurt. Their trading blows flashes of energy off as they're both just hitting it, striking her.

You're watching as Grelnok is taking hits and still holding strong, the blood starting to spit out of her mouth as she's holding her front point. That finishes the creature's turn. That brings us to Tavima. I'm sorry, did I waste my chance for? I can't tell if, I think it gets used

when you actually activate it and then it's done. Okay, cool. I can't quite tell. Here, I'll give you the points on that. This is for Crystal Weapon? Yeah. Crystal Weapon. The duration is one round. But is that the one round of its use, or is it just the charge and if you don't use it, it just holds?

If you don't use it in the next round, it goes away. All right, so that's gone. Sorry, I'm so sorry. I'm going to run up and Shield Charge it. Go for it, yeah. Okay, okay. 14? 14 is its armor class.

Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. 15 points of bludgeoning damage. Amazing. Nice. And they make a DC 13 strength save. All righty. We're getting off prone, buddy. It rolls a 15. Yeah, okay. This guy's pretty. It's huge.

It's pretty beefy. Are you flanking it? Ooh, yeah, I would've tried to come over to the side to get to the side. I don't know if that means anything. You wouldn't be able to flank. Oh, okay. Because with your movement, because you didn't quite catch up entirely from where she was up front,

because you stayed back and blasted it. Okay. So it would take your full movement to get up and to the side, but you're not flanking it. Got it, okay, cool. So you rush to the side and just Captain America slam it into the side with your shield in front and takes the impact. Okay, it still takes five points of fire damage

from backlash, as that goes down to. Indeed, yeah, it does. Nice. Shoot. And I will burn one more stamina to puncture it. Okay. So DC 14 dex save. No, six. Yes. 10 points. Damn! Of piercing damage.

Are you puncturing it with the shield? The center of the shield. Yeah. I put the little spiky boy on it, and I'm like, . As you pull back, it leaves this Are you puncturing it with the shield? The center of the shield. Yeah. With the little spiky boy on it, and I'm like,. As you pull back, it leaves this splattering trail. You hit something nasty in there.

Hell yeah. Hell yeah. That's it. All right, finishes your turn. Hoa, you're up. Slaughter, you're undead. Okay, so the potion is a bonus action, right? Correct. What is it again?

That's 1d6 plus one to heal, and you regain one stamina if you've spent it. Oh, that's amazing. So that's a seven. Great, feeling great. And then my stamina. In that case, I was going to do something different, but the stamina changes things. I run up to this thing.

I pull out my eye staff. I get all crazy in the eyes again. It's time to die! Oh shit! Nice, go for it, roll for an attack. All right. Holy, that's a 21 to hit. That hits.

All right, and then we've got, that is a five plus six, that's six, and then I use my extra stamina points to add 1d10. So six plus, what is 10? Come here, come here, come here. Is 15. 11, that's a single point of damage. 15? Yes, 15 damage.

And he just got ice-cleaned. That's awesome. Swinging forward as you do, you see the ice snap against the fill with crystalline ice magical energy. As you swing wide and as you do strike, it impacts and shatters. And as it blasts it from the left-hand side, the creature falls to one knee.

You can now see the shards are stuck in the side of it, and they each and every kind of burst in the side, leaving these open wounds where they were. Well done. Die, you beast! Love it. And then that's my turn. All right, eventually, what's your turn?

Great, it leaves us to Slaughter and Mallory are on deck. Is it looking rough? It's looking hurt. Oh no! Mm-mm-mm-mm. Ooh! Hoo boy, hoo boy. You got this! It's a powerful beast.

It's a powerful beast. I will try something different. I will use my stamina and I will unfurl an orb-like web at my foe. And I will try trapping webs. You've got it. Okay, so it has DC 14. It's a DC 14 dexterity save.

Natural 18. Sam! Sam, I'm so sorry. Oof. Webs! What? We brought a LARPer to a sword fight. This is going so wrong.

It keeps sounding like beanbags, weirdly. What's happening? So the orb, though, it's and the webs splatter behind it and it shrugs him off a little bit, but the next turn it'll still explode as long as he stays there. Okay.

Okay. If it didn't hit him, but went past him, is it near where Tavima is, or is it in danger? Well, it still impacts the area. It's just him being able to avoid it, because you didn't roll to hit, this is him rolling to dodge it. So it still blasts in the area behind him

and the web's still there. It doesn't hit any of your friends, because you aimed just beyond it to get him in the space. And he's a big dude. So he's not caught in the web. Just you wait. We need to back him up gently into it. Go on, get.

I'm on. All right. I'll just edge along the perimeter. Other side, okay. Are you healing? Huh? Do you have any healing? I can only heal me. I thought you healed him! You healed him with a rage!

I can only do that once per short rest. And I'm already out of magicka. Come on. Okay. Mallory, you're up. I'm going to try and flank where, I'm going to run up and flank wherever there's flanking to be had. Okay, you run into the web to do that.

Oh, is that a? Just to be aware. The creature right now, it has Grelnok, Tavima, and Hwa, like all in the front and side of it, and then to its back and left is just this web that you just watch him throw. Oh, I'm not going to run into that then. Yeah, the space is a little crowded right now.

You could maybe, where you are now, because you're on the opposite side, you'd be able to get into combat with it, but no place that you could blanket where you are, unfortunately. That's okay. I will try and get safely into combat with it. Okay, so you rush up and you're squeezing in next to Tavima and Grelnok.

This is not going to end well, hey? All right, let's, I have no magic left, so I'm just going to hit it with my stick. Hit it with your stick, buddy. Not that guy now. No. Hey, do you want to back up, buddy? I'm going to back up if I have anything to back up. The good news is you do hit it.

It's just not hard. No, it's really not. Seven, seven. Yeah, no. No. All right, and so you're backing up? Just a hair. Just a hair? Okay. I feel like it's going to operate on you.

Oh, that's true. No, no, no, it's just a hair. Just a hair, okay. I feel like it's just going to operate on you. Oh, that's true. No, no, no, it's just a hair. I forgot about that. Yeah, you did. You did. Yeah. That'll be a 17 to hit. Oh yeah, that hits. No, no. You take eight points of slashing damage.

Yeah. Oh, shit. The cook! You step five feet back and you're like, not in melee with it at the moment, so. I will keep backing up as much as I can to get away from it. You can move up five more feet back, because you took a lot of movement to get up into at the moment. I will keep backing up as much as I can to get away from it. You can move up five more feet back, because you took a lot of movement

to get up into the fray. I'll take it. Okay. That finishes your turn, Mallory. Grelnok, you're up. All right, I'm going to, with my free hand, take that potion that I found and down it. Yeah. Which gives me a four.

Okay. Wow. And one additional stamina point. And I'm going to hit it with my axe. Do it, roll for an attack. Ah! That is a 21. 21, that definitely hits.

And I'm going to use one of my regain stamina to add a uppercut to this. Hell yeah, go for it. Cool. Six plus six is 12 points. 12 points of damage, looking real rough. Let's go! As you strike it and then just uppercut it from behind.

In the bottom jaw, you see teeth break and spray, and as it looks down to you, blood pouring out of its jaw, open wounds everywhere. The venom is still pulsing and infecting the scratch from earlier. The axe and slashing wounds, the ice gashing. It's looking really, really rough. All right. I finished his turn.

That's all I got. All right, it's now the Runak monster's turn. Oh no. Hit me! You all rushed in to be pretty close. The bottom two arms begin to swirl around once more and then pulling upward, the ground beneath you three, you moved back because you took that type of opportunity,

but you're out of the fire now, glows brightly, and then the palm of fire erupts, engulfing you three. I need you all to make a dexterity saving throw for me. You have a plus one on saving throws, right? Is your thing still up, Hwa? It is still up. It's up for... Sorry. 10 minutes.

I rolled a nat 20, by the way. Both of you got nat 20s? That's amazing! Hell yeah. That's good. So you both take only nine points of fire damage. Only nine? Yeah. Are you up? I failed. Barely. take only nine points of fire damage. Only nine? Yeah.

Are you up? I failed. Barely. Okay, 18 points of fire damage. I'm down. Oh noes. Grelnok, as the flames subside, you both like,

and you both look over on the ground, singed and currently burning, just flames. No, no, no, no, no. No! And the ground beneath you is beginning to continue to burn. Since you're still in this space, you can see there's a lava pool right there.

Oh no! She made a mediocre drink. Cut my head off! Use it as a skull! Maybe you'll hit with it. Maybe the name of our restaurant can be Grelnok's Skull. Oh! That's a good name. Put it on the plank in the front.

That's going to finish its turn. Tavima, you're up. Ugh! No! You're my best friend. She's down. Heal her! We've got at it.

All right. Just a normal attack. Go for it. Big old swing of your sword. Let's do backlash one more time for my last magicka. I think we've got at it. All right. Just a normal attack. Go for it. Big old swing of your sword. Let's do backlash one more time for my last magicka. Just got to burn it. You got it.

Please fail. That is going to be a 16 on the DC. Not, it's good. You made it. Nevermind. Normal attack. 17 to hit. 17 hits. Go ahead and roll damage. I don't know what an eight is anymore, I'm very nervous. 10 points.

Nice. Of slashing damage, and then I'm going to use my last stamina to puncture it. Go for it. DC 14, dex save. Natural 20. Shoot! Okay. All right. That's it. That's your turn?

I'm out, yeah. Okay. You don't move out of the ground that's currently burning up? No, okay. Sorry. Oh no. If they fail, oh, you didn't fail, so I didn't have to burn my stamina. So no, for my bonus action,

then I'm going to use my last stamina for Shield Wall. Well, if you use your bonus action to try the puncture. Oh, that's right, that's right, never mind. No, no, it's a free, sorry, free action is puncture. It's a free action, so you can still use your bonus action if you want to. No, but I attempted backlash for a bonus action. You did, yeah.

We're good. So you're good. Okay, but you're staying put, or are you moving out of the heated ground? Yeah, I'll back up. Is there any way I can take, no. Can I take Grelnok with me? You can. Mm? You can. Yeah, I'll back up. Is there any way I can take, no. Can I take Grelnok with me? You can. You can. Yeah, whatever it takes.

Okay. Gotta get her out of there. You grab her and pull back. Because the creature has gone again, it does take an attack of opportunity on you. Yeah, that's fair. Oh no. It has disadvantage! It does. This is the first thing that's attacked me.

That's true. The other thing. You're right, Shield Wall. Well, no, it doesn't have disadvantage. No, no, no, it's not from Shield Wall. It's from when I did my Rune Focus forever. Oh, that's right, you're right. That's true. That's still a 16. Does that hit you?

No! Nice! Because of the plus one! Yeah, all right! Oh god! It's all coming together. As you're pulling her back, you look up, right as you see this one arm arc down the slow-mo shot as the blade comes towards you. In that brief moment, you see Hwa out of the corner of the eye

just flex that magical aura, and this slight burst of frost just shears it off, and it misses you by millimeters. Also, because it tries to hit her with that, it gets plus three damage, three damage and frost damage. If it hits or if it misses? Oh, I don't know, it just says if, oh, they're hit. Right, so that's okay.

Better, I think, in this circumstance. Yeah, please, you do it, yeah. That's awesome. And with that, you pull Grelnok out of the way. Well done. So you do not take fire damage at the end of your turn. Go, go, go, go, go! All right.

Hoa, you're up. You are bartender! I don't have any more healing left. Oh no! I can only use one more short rest! No, you're asking for a short rest. You went right in. We should have taken a short rest! Regret.

I'm going to cast Swarm. I need to get away. It's going to kill me if I do that. I'm going to cast Swarm and just try to kill away. It's going to kill me if I do that. I'm going to cast Swarm and just try to kill it with it. I think it already used its reaction. It did already use its reaction. Yeah, so you can move if you want to. Oh, I hecka move away.

I move so, so far away. You just go and go. My full move in is 30 feet, I move. And then I do Swarm again. I cast a bunch of Fetcher Flies into the air. They must make a DC 14 con saving throw. You got it. Natural 17.

Okay, they take half of the damage? Takes half damage, though. So it still damages it. Wow, that's a lot. 11, 15, 16, 17, 18. That's 19 divided by two. So nine points of damage. Yes. It's looking real hurt, y'all.

Oh my god. That's real hurt. You can do this, Slaughter, you're up. Slaughter! All right, Slaughter, it's your turn. What are you doing? You can do it! What are you doing? Pick off a skull. No, not that one.

No, not that one. I'm going for the smallest one. And I close my eyes. And I throw blindly, trying to hit this fucking thing with a fucking skull. 19. Oh my god! It hits.

Okay. I hope it's not totally immune to fire damage. I've hit fire damage already. It's taking fire damage. Okay. Six points to fire damage. I've taken fire damage already. He's taking fire damage. Okay. Six points of fire damage, plus, I assume, the trapping webs explode? That's right!

Hold on, let me look that up. Oh my god. Hold on. Oh, there, it's right here. Yeah, they do, they would explode, so. Which is another 10 points of poison damage. I cannot believe I'm about to hear this. Yes! How do you want to do this? Yes.

What a payout. A long con indeed. That's ridiculous! As I hurl the skull, I just say, my name is Slaughter Grimm, As I hurl the skull, I just say, my name is Slaughter Grimm, and I will be your server tonight.

And I just arc it right straight for the eye, so the skull eyes hit in the eyes. Full on, like we're talking Fury Road camera work as it goes towards his perspective. It hits it in the forehead, and it goes a little cross-eyed and takes a couple steps back, and it's still standing, but its feet get caught up in the web

right as the web begins to light up. And it looks back at the web and looks at you. Oh, shit. And you just watch it get blown into pieces, spattering the inside of the room with Daedric gore, raining from above. We did it! Let's stabilize really quickly.

Oh yeah, how do I do that? Can I make a medicine check? Make a medicine check. I run over to her, but I don't touch her because my hands are needles. That's worse than rogue. Does that one help? I can help, I can help.

Thank you, yeah, please. Do you want to roll? Yeah, because I got a seven. Oh my god, a seven also. Oh god. I got a save for me. I'm sorry! Wait, no one can help her? What's your medicine check?

It's plus three. Oh, wait, do it again and I'll assist. Wait, I think I can do something. Maybe, maybe? I'm also a plus three. I'm just not a good roller. Here, I'll cast, I do have two. So if I cast Hungry Scythe

on Grelnok's weapon, Tavima, can you pilot her hand to hit me with it? Because it will heal the wielder of the weapon. As you say it, I just grab her limp hand. All right, well, you haven't cast it yet. Oh. So roll for attack. Wait, I haven't cast it yet?

You asked if it would happen. Shit! Oh, good. You cast it yet? You asked if it would happen. Shit! Oh, good. You finish the question and then just. What did you roll to hit? Sorry, do you want to cast it first before I do it now? Oh, sure, yeah. Okay. Okay, and then that's a 21 to hit.

It hits. So go ahead and roll damage with the longsword. Or sorry, the battleaxe. I don't know if this works. Oh, the battleaxe. You can roll it. Oh, sure. That's fine. Seven.

So it says, on your next successful attack, you heal yourself half of the damage that you dealt to the target. So you take seven points of slashing damage and you come to consciousness, scaling up three points. Yeah! We got it? I can't believe that worked.

More or less. It was five seconds! I'm a hero! I don't believe it. Come on! It didn't happen. Come on! It didn't happen. No on! It didn't happen. No, it didn't happen. It was glorious. It was very nice.

That's sweet that you guys want, mm, didn't happen. She's not going to believe me. It's all right. I'll prove myself with diligent wait staffing. Yay! Everyone okay? Are we?

That was. Should we take a rest? What, what, what did we just kill? What, what? Yeah, what, what, what's my voice? I still don't know. What did we just kill? What did we just kill? Going to examine this chamber a little bit.

Can we short rest while you examine the chamber? Yeah, that would be great. I would love a short rest. Make an investigation check, if you like. Oof. So many ingredients. Why do I even bother? Eight. Eight.

That's not, it could be worse. Anybody else want to make an investigation check? I'm busy. Sure, I'll try desperately. I'll walk around, sure. So the two of you are going to write. Natural 20. Let's go! Late game. I'm a late bloomer, guys. Sure, so the two of you are going around. Natural 20. Let's go!

Late game. I'm a late bloomer, guys. We're right at the end. Between the two of you looking about, this appears to be some sort of a vault that was designed to contain something, but it appears to be empty, and it had been empty for a while.

And with a natural 20, you piece together that some of these other bodies and the conversations you've heard and the notes you've found, that these were some odd cultists looking at the masks and some of the iconography and the shape of it and the shape on the door,

there are facets of it you can see that all connect to the name Mehrunes Dagon, which you had decreed unto the group before. They were here searching for something. What? Ronan's middle name. Yeah, obviously, yeah. Coming to search for the ambitions you had overheard, come to prove themselves, but apparently failed,

or what they're seeking is not here any longer. But whatever this place is, it's around the corner from your tavern, and whatever you can scavenge from it for the time being, before any other looters seem to follow suit, is yours to cash grab. We need 300 gold. Is there anything we can take off this four-armed body?

Any other cultists got these sick robes on? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We definitely get those robes. There's four other ones. They could be our uniforms. They could be uniforms. Yeah. yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We definitely get those robes. There's four other ones. They could be our uniforms. They could be uniforms. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, that's great. I feel like they're matching.

If we sell one of them, that should be enough to square our debt. Yeah, maybe. Maybe. Are they all magic? We'll look around for more. They all are considered the spider silk robes. So wearing them gives you plus one to AC and plus one to saving throw.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Put them on. Between the two of you, you also know that these robes are probably uniform, right? Because all of them are wearing it. So whatever group they belong to, this is definitively a sign of who they are. Oh, well.

Well, we probably don't want to be part of this group, but it's a great costume, or maybe you can just rub out the symbol on the front. I don't know. You could have it paid to be dyed, maybe. Yeah! We can find somebody to do that. I'm like, bring it over it.

Yeah, just wear it like a, I got a thing. I got a guy. We still need money. Yeah. What about the body? The forearm body? So the torso has exploded. There are four arms and the head still intact just at different parts of the chamber

and the most lower part of the legs that are now just down the stair a little bit. But you do have a head and you have a note asking to find anything that remained within. I've got a powerful build, so I can carry it pretty easily. You put it on your head?

No, I put it on my back like a backpack. Okay. Okay. Gathered the materials, gathered some of these found artifacts, the information, or at least shreds of information about what transpired here and what this cult was after, as well as a connection of an individual

looking to pay for this information and proof of what this might be. You all slowly begin to make your way up from the depths beneath the hill with the hope and seeming confirmation that with the right questions and the right new friends, you might be able to pay off your debts. And with that, we're going to go ahead and close this.

We still have another. We have to name our tavern at least. Oh, that too. We have to decide on it before we end. Okay. Well, we'll say as an epilogue to this, as we go to credits and credits roll, and we're down, there's the after credit scene as you're all back and getting cleaned up in the tavern. What a night.

Woo! Just the sad shawarma. Can you make shawarma? I mean, I've had stuff curing this whole time. There's already, I'm just going to go in and start scraping. So, read off that list. Oh, I

wrote down one of the things. You said you were writing them down the whole time! We had described it with my imagination! Well, then, what's the one you wrote down? We had dirty hole. Dingy hole. Silver lining? We had Dirty Hole. Dirty Hole. Dingy Hole. Silver Lining. Silver Lining.

We had a real good hole. Really nice hole. A really nice hole. Really nice. There we go. Grelnok Skull. I still think it's solid. I think that's got to be in the mix.

Maybe that'll be the subtitle of the, like underneath the main, you know, kind of name block. We have a tavern with a subtitle? Yeah. I don't know, it could be a thing. Yeah, see? I like it.

Should we just pick the dirty hole and? Then stick with it. Dingy. Dingy, I think dingy hole. Dingy the dingy hole. Hole and not pit, is that correct? Yeah. Yeah. W-H-O-L-E or H-O-L or H-O-L-E? Do we want to get weird? I don't know. H-O-H, W-H.

Yeah. Yeah. W-H. Dirty hole. Yeah, the dirty hole. Dirty hole. Critical role. Critical role. What does that mean? It's a terrible title.

I think it'll attract the exact kind of clientele we want. Yeah. Okay. Sure. Well, you know what? We'll workshop it in the epilogue to the epilogue. Yeah, this is the Return of the King of Multiple Endings. Yeah. It's still not done?

The dingy hole it is. No, I don't like it, though. See? I'll make up some new names. I don't like it. We started with Juggs, how'd we get here? Ghost Juggs is over here. The Burn Journal?

The Burn Journal. Oh. It sounds like you're Southern trying to speak French. The Burn Journal? The Burn Journal. The Burn Journal. It sounds like you're southern trying to speak French. Burn Journal. Burn Journal. Burn Journal. The Burn Journal Journal. Grelnok's skull it is. That I kind of like, though.

And then we could put the big skull out there and they'll think, that's Grelnok. Oh, I like it, I like it. You were my team and we're born again. I like that. As you all begin to nail the large skull to the front of your business endeavor and paint in the name Grelnok's Skull into the front,

we pull away to the grotwood. And who knows? Perhaps there's more adventures to the grot wood. And who knows? Perhaps there's more adventures to tell down the road about this group of odd individuals. And there we go. Our inaugural episode here of our Elder Scrolls Online game experience. A huge thank you to Bethesda and ZeniMax Online Studios

for working with us to make this happen. Those of you, once again, who have the chance and want to go check it out, ESO's Blackwood chapter release is coming up soon, as well as all the multiple DLCs. It's going to be awesome. Check all that all out at www.elderskullsonline.com

slash buy. And, yeah, is it Thursday yet? Good night. And that's a wrap for our special one shot inspired by the Elder Scrolls online Blackwood sponsored by our friends at Bethesda and ZeniMax online studios. We hope you enjoyed our adventure into the Elder Scrolls online universe. And remember, you can check out the Elder Scrolls online Blackwood right now at Elder

Scrolls online dot com slash buy at elderscrollsonline.com slash buy. That's slash B-U-Y. Okay, until next time, Critters. Bye-bye!