Critical Role - Toys and Tiny Things | EP 2 | Weird Kids

Episode Date: March 31, 2026

The Weird Kids episodes from 2025 are now releasing weekly on YouTube and your favorite podcast platform!   New Epsiodes of Weird Kids are coming exclusivly to Beacon soon! Watch all available episodes on Beacon now: https://bit.ly/WKBeacon   ------------------------------------ From Care Bears to Polly Pocket; Ashley Johnson and Taliesin Jaffe talk toys that hit every Millennial’s nostalgia nerve. Of course this is through the lens of Hollywood Christmas parties where one could win entire toy runs in carnival games or get gifted all of the sci-fi Japanese toys bought for your character's space station bedroom.   Also in this episode: • Ashley meeting Arnold Schwarzenegger • Taliesin’s days as a Japanese toy store manager • Zen out with 3D Pin Art Boards   ------------------------------------ Ashley Johnson and Taliesin Jaffe deep dive into their lives as the Weird Kids! This is a formal invitation to all the misfits, outcasts, and weirdos to take a seat at our table and join these former child actors as they embrace their unique upbringings and celebrate all things weird and wonderful.   Learn more at https://critrole.com/weirdkids/   Produced by Maxwell James and Will Lamborn Theme Song by Dave Heatwave Animation by Max Schapiro   BEACON We’re excited to bring you even MORE with a Beacon membership! Start your 7-day free trial today at https://beacon.tv/join and get unparalleled access to the shows you love completely ad-free! You’ll receive NEW Beacon exclusive series, instant access to VODs & podcasts, live event pre-sales, merch discounts, & a private Discord.   YOUTUBE MEMBERS / TWITCH SUBSCRIBERS Twitch Subscribers and YouTube Members gain instant access to VODs of our shows, moderated live chats, and custom emojis & badges: https://www.youtube.com/criticalrole/join https://www.twitch.tv/criticalrole   Follow Weird Kids! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theweirdkidspod TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@hellobeacon YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheWeirdKidsPod Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Oh, hello, fellow weird kids. Thank you for joining us at our table as we dive into conversations about our unique childhoods, exploring all things nostalgic and unconventional, and just chatting about all the things we love. If you enjoy this episode, head over to beacon.tv, where you can access exclusive new episodes of Weird Kids, as well as other great content, discounts on Critical Role merchandise, early access to tickets, members-only discord, and much, much more. Thanks again and enjoy the show. Hey! Welcome back! What the heck are you doing here? It's crazy. We're back.

And they're back. Why are we back for a round two? They let us do it. They did let us do it. And everybody else is back too, which means we have to keep being entertaining. We have to keep doing stuff. With news stories. I've run out. Yeah, I'm all out of things to talk about.

Everything interesting that's ever happened to me. Yeah, same. I really like your shirt. Thank you. What's happening with this shirt? This shirt is a, for those. Again, for those at home, it is covered in a wonderful flower beetle pattern. I feel bad that I cannot remember the name of the company that makes it, but they make really fun.

Do you want me to look at your tag? Yeah. Is that weird? Look at my tag because I love these people and I buy a lot of stuff from them. I know. I do too because you've worn this Morning Witch. Morning Witch. They're on Instagram and they put out crazy stuff and I own a few of their pants. I love it, Talison. Thank you. It's my attempt to be colorful post-gaw.

It goes with your hair. That was intentional I'm really proud of you Thank you I'm trying to do a thing What are you drinking right now Out of your grandma mug? I'm some sort of pumpkin

Flavored caffeine drink God that's a good mug Thank you I've been collecting a few I have too many mugs at home So now I'm just bringing them here And eventually they will overtake our kitchen I think that's what I'm gonna do

I love collecting mugs We both are collectors We collect a lot of I am collect I try and fight it But there's only so much you can do. I get gifted a lot of mugs too. Yeah, it's a good gift to give and to receive. I feel like when we were talking about the set that we were going to do for weird kids, you and I both are maximalists, I would say. I love that word, big fan. Yes. I try to be,

I would love, I love the idea of like clean lines being a minimalist, just having just the little things that you need, but I can't. I like stuff too much. Even when I was like at my low, when I'm like trying to like living in the worst studio apartment in Hollywood, uh, sharing it with, with roaches so together that they have their own sag card. I still surrounded by stoches sewn together. No, no, like they even have their, so together. I'm sorry. That, yeah. Oh, okay. Like honestly, they were working more than I was at the time. Well, okay. They were very talented. And, yeah, Listen. They could sing and dance like Sam Riegel.

Yes, they could. Our friend Sam Riegel, who is just an incredible performer of all sorts. Joe's Apartment is actually a movie with singing and dancing cockroaches. But don't go looking that up. Well, it's its own thing. Joe's Apartment? I believe that was the name of a terrible comedy with singing and dancing cockroaches. I'm so sorry to bring that back.

It's the things that are buried. This is an episode about cockroaches. Apparently now it is. I hate them. You know, yeah, I like spiders. I can't handle cockroachers. I can really do spiders. I can do rats.

I can do mice. I can do things with hair. Spiders have, some spiders have hair. Well, yeah, and like a tarantula. Yeah. I can deal with a tarantula. No big deal. I like spiders because they're only in your house if there's something to eat and what they eat are things I want less.

And when they run out of food, they'll probably leave. Really? I mean, wouldn't you? Well, I mean. The cupboard's bare. Yeah, fair. And, you know, a little lemon pledge, and they don't like putting their feet on citrus. So you can kind of, I learned that on a movie set.

Really? I did. It's how they would wrangle spiders. Spiders don't like pledge? Yeah, they'd use pledge because it's the citrus. They don't like stepping on citrus. So they could make little pathways for the spiders to walk on by when you would have a spider wrangler. They would happen.

These things just don't, you know. Isn't that weird that there are, see, this is another thing. And this is what I went from the last episode, we talked about working with animals. Yeah. You told me something. God, I don't remember when this was, but for some reason it blew my mind. Oh, no. When you were working with dolphins.

Yes. And you said that if you click your fingernails under the water, they respond to it. Because it sounds like them. It's some sound. I don't know if it's like a natural thing or it's because these were trained dolphins. Crunch and Lailani. That was their names. Crunch.

Crunch and Laylani. Great. Crunch and Laylani, the two dolphins I worked with. We'll get into a whole, I'm sure we can do a whole episode of this. But yeah, the clicking year, that's what the trainers told me to do to get them to come to you for, like. And would they? Oh, yeah. They would just swim on over and be like, hello, I'm Laylani. Yeah. Crunch was more down. Layloni was, you know, when she was in the mood. There's always like one that's a little bit more friendly of the animals. Yeah, she was more of a loner. She was, you know, a one dolphin wolf pack. I don't know. Spider wrangling thing to me is.

There's always, yeah. I had to work with snakes and there was a snake wrangler, but for some reason a spider wrangler seems so wild to me. They're, man. Because I just see like a little, like, pin. Oh, yeah. Like a corral with little spiders in it. Man, there are so many stories I'm holding in because we could do a whole lot.

We will do a whole animal episode because I'm now thinking about Alex Ward and his, his animal. Oh, my God. We've got to get Alex Ward up in here. I know. That'd be hilarious. But yes, because, yeah, he's a whole other wonderful vibe of actor. Yes. Yeah.

I mean, the original thought for today was to talk about toys. And I like the idea because I had a very weird relationship with toys growing up. Okay. I did too. So, but I think a lot of this goes back. Like, I didn't, I didn't play with toys like a normal kid. Whatever that even means. I'm curious.

No, I mean, elaborate. I'm curious because we've been avoiding this subject for fun. I will say, like, I wasn't, I wasn't a Barbie girl. Were you a Barbie girl? I would have been. Did you ever get into it? You would have been? I like the notion of them.

I was more, I mean, like, I definitely crossed gender lines pretty hard with my toys. I had a really nice collection of care bears. I had the full rainbow bright run and a decent. Like I had a smattering of my little pony. Specifically, I like the little seahorse ones because it was a good bath toy too. Oh, yeah. Loved bath toys. Mm-hmm.

Love bath toys. Like, I think toys that I still, that will always, that are a core memory are the seven dwarves, um, not the, not squishies, but they were bath toys. Yeah. kept those things forever. I don't know why. Those were like the toys that I had with me for so long. But a lot of the toys that I grew up with are here on the set.

Oh, really? Yeah. That's, I definitely have. Yeah, I definitely have a few as well. And like, did you, did you, okay, a couple questions. Okay. How, like your notion of playing with toys, mine because I was often alone, was I would set up these giant, I don't want to quite call a diorama, but like I would, I would just set everything up

in these very complex ways and, and just sort of... You would set up a scene or a story? Yeah, a scene or a story. Oftentimes it was like, it was very like pre-battle, like battlefield negotiations. It would never actually get to the battle. Like, I would never, because I, like, I treasured these things too much to actually damage them. And then I came up with some weird ways of playing with them with physics, which I will get into.

See, that we need to get into because that was more of the stuff. I was like, how can I... This is terrible. How can I destroy this toy? I got to that late. That was a teenage thing later, but especially since that was a whole... I was not allowed GI Joe's. That was a thing.

Why? My parents decided that that was the line of like, like, quote-unquote war toy. And I resented it for a while, but I eventually got over it. And when I finally became an adult and could buy toys myself, I kept that line. I don't know why. I just felt... You were like, I'm never going to cross the little. line. You know, it is like the toy version is I've been vegetarian for so long. It just seems

silly to stop even though it was my parents' decision. But and then like, like, I don't know if like the studio ever gave you. The studios would give us me like us, all the kids' Christmas gifts every day. And they tended to be pretty bat shit cool. They were awesome. They were awesome. Because it was like you would, you would do a show and they would, the studio would give out like a holiday gift or like a start of show gift and sometimes sometimes it would just be like the same gift across the board for all of the cast and crew but other times it would be specific to a kid it was always nice I never got specific but it was always something that they were producing at the time and it was usually like I got a nice set of Alvin and the Chipmunks toys and I was deep in I owned vinyl I was

like really deep in Alvin Simon Theodore do do do do do do do do do do do do Do-Doo? I think it's as far before we get in trouble. Okay, we don't want to get in trouble. I had Urban Chipmunk, which was one of their albums. It's great. Dang. And then I got a Fival Mouskowitz.

Oh, my God. Could wear the hat. No way. Fival goes west. Yeah. Well, American Tale. Both are great. American Tale is like so good.

For everyone under 40, this is an animated mouse. Steven Spielberg produced a, yeah, with a giant. He did? I think that was a Spielberg or Amblin. I'm going to say Amblin. You're going to say Amblin. Okay, I'm going to look this up. Steven Spielberg's thing.

I'm going to look this up. And I still want to IMDB you. Oh, I have it. It's horrifying. Oh, God. And then the other, I briefly worked when I was at Lorimar shooting a sitcom that one day we will get into, they had like carnival games for their Christmas thing, for their Christmas party, and they were all giving away great toys. And they were giving away for winning the carnival games.

games, Thundercats action figures. And I got the complete run just by like, by playing carnival games. You just kept playing. All I did was like, I want that one, I want that one. I got a complete set just by like throwing balls at targets. Jeez. It was, I felt spoiled briefly. Okay, well, first of all, I forgot Christopher Plummer was in it.

In which? In American Tale. Oh, yeah, no. Wait, who played, who played Fival? Philip Glasser. You're kidding. Oh, that's great. I remember him.

I remembered him as a kid, as a kid actor. Okay, wait, let's see. So the director was Don Bluth. Okay, Don Bluth is very serious for anybody who knows their animation. That's, Don Bluth is a big deal. All cast and crew. Wait, how do I look up producer? I don't know.

What did you say? Oh, I think Ambleon, yeah, I think Ambleau. Steven Spielberg did produce it. Look at that. What the heck? I remember that because after we went to see it, we went to the little Amlin Entertainment area of Universal.

And you only know it's his because they have a well out front of the studio and Jaws is coming out of the well if you look into it. Did you go to the premiere? I may have. Of American Tale?

Yeah, I did. Whoa! I had forgotten that. Yeah. Yeah, because if you're going an ambulance entertainment afterwards, you're there for an event. I guess it was an event.

I was just excited about the doll. What was the, that's just reminded me about something. What was your, like, your favorite event that you went to as a kid that you remembered. Oh, boy. It's like, actor event kind of thing.

Oh, man. I remember doing a parade and I don't remember what parade, like being on a, on a, on a float. And I, it may have been like the Rose Bowl thing. I'm not, you know, the Pasadena. And maybe that, like, that's the thing. And I also did a couple of the Youth and Film Awards, which were a thing. We're a thing. And they were.

Weird. They were horrifying, but at least I was at a table with other kids where we were like, what the fuck is this? That was strange. And we all were there. And I think you and I were there at the same time. We may have been there at the same time. But we didn't know each other yet. Yeah. I went to in 1995. Good year.

I went to the opening, was invited to the opening of the Indiana Jones ride at Disneyland. Not to brag. And I got to meet Arnold Schwarzenegger. He was there. And I remember going up to him and like tugging on his shirt and being like, can I get a picture with you? And I think I did. I was going to say, so you have a picture with the governor. With the governor.

That's amazing. And they gave away like a T-shirt, which I just found. Oh, yes. I'm excited for that. And like this little, I should actually bring it and put it on the set. No, it's like this. metal, this like a, I don't even know what it is. It's just like a metal thing that just stands up that just says Indiana Jones the ride 95.

I'm real deep into amusement park rides. You are very into amusement park rides and lore. And lore. And I love some good lore. But they have, they used to give away at the very beginning, these little cards that were translations of what was written on the wall. Yes. Yes, I know what you're talking about And I think I have one of those too

They would have given them away at the premiere And it's almost I think most of it is just ads for like AT&T or Spring because they funded it So it's like a lot of telephone advertisements That's right Because each of the games always have Are games

Each of the rides have like a sponsor Yeah I forgot about that Yeah so I just remember being a little disappointed You're like It was young It's like you look at the translator and it's like, drink Coca-Cola.

I was like, I suppose this is why it's a cursed temple. I don't know. I maybe. God, I love that ride so much. I kind of want to show some. Show me something. This back here. Oh, yeah.

My pee-wee-Herman. So my mom and dad bought this for me, and he... He looks like he talks. Oh, there's a pull. There's a pull, but... There's a pull at the back of this toy. The thing is, I'm going to undress him right now. It's getting weird.

Okay. I feel like... It's a good suit. Peewey Herman had a good suit. I can't find an opening to him to maybe switch out the battery. Either you can try, find a little screwdriver or a nature's screwdriver, which is a knife. I can't even find, like, an opening. I'm going to have to, like, surgery him open.

Yeah, we'll get an exacto knife and play operation. Play doctor? Well, that, yeah. Here we go. Wait, sometimes you can get it to work. I know you are, but what am I? Oh my God, here, let me try. I got to try this.

This is, this is, this is nightmare fuel. See if I can do it. I was just a laugh, huh? I love you. Yeah. What I think is funny about this is we're putting his mouth at the microphone. I know. Like that's going to make the difference.

I hadn't thought about that and now, oh my God. Yeah, and I came on the cherry chair. That is a, that is also nightmare fuel. Check out this technology. the eyes on the chair flip back and forth cool right i mean yes oh it's a puppet oh no it's a puppet i know i love a puppet it's a it's really just this is one of my prized possessions

like to the point where i was nervous about bringing this to the set but listen we make sacrifices here for all of you we do i am i am highly entertained and this is also going to require a field trip to a toy store that I know. That should be a lot of fun. Do you have a toy here that you can spot that you really liked? Oh, man, I don't know what I put anything. Well, like, part of it is that I had, I had siblings and they got so much of my stuff. There is, there is that skull. That's, that's almost, I don't even know if that counts as a toy. I mean, like, it is, it is, it is kind of very me in the fact that it's not playable.

You know, a lot of my toys are, I mean, I had a few. playable ones, but like the skull is really good. I also had, I was really big into the, into the, um, the three, three-d picture bits. Oh yeah. What else is up here? I know. Now I'm, now I'm blanking. Uh, the skull is a whole thing. We still have, shockingly, we still have so much more that we could have added. I know. But we didn't. And I have like my, I like tiny things. I have a lot of little tiny things. I love dollhouse. I had a dollhouse as a kid, which I really loved. You did? Yeah, my parents built me a dollhouse. It was huge. See, that was the type of, like, doll houses I did like, because I think it was, I think you and I both, like, really little tiny things.

And so I think it was like, oh, I'm making a little mini house, which I think was, that was more appealing to me than, like. Oh, yeah. And I could put, like, you know, Luke Skywalker and, like, Conan in the same room. Yeah. I just would wonder what they were talking about. So would you take. Would you take your figurines because you cared about them? Would they fight each other?

I was not. It was mostly communication. Again, I was really big into like setting up the battle. And then once the battle was set up, it was just kind of figuring out who was going to have a conversation with whom. Yeah. Well, I mean, I would take, I mean, the Barbies that I did have, I would just have them like make out and have sex with each. Oh, I mean, there was some making out clearly. But I, you know, what I thought that was.

Yeah. Where I would just like smushle them together. But yeah, I mean, inevitably. Yeah, inevitably. But it was also, I loved a play set. So if there was like something that did something like a trapdoor, I would use that trapdoor over and over again. Hell yeah.

And then I got really into Japanese toys very early on like before anime was a thing. Like I. How old were you? I guess I was pretty young. I was in the movie 2010. And like the year before me and a friend of mine introduced me to Japanese cartoons and it was like in and Japanese toys and I was kind of getting into it. And again, this was before, this was in the 90, like actually like the late 80s, early 90s. And they were buying, they like were doing my kids room in future toys.

And so the prop people were using Japanese toys to make future toys. quote unquote. Oh. And I started to be like, oh, I know what that is and I know what that is. And they were so excited that they let me go through the catalog and be like, here, which ones do you want for your room? And then they just gave all of them to me at the end of that. No way.

Oh, yeah. I even got the crazy three-wheeled bike that I got to use in 2010. Like they, like, because they were just so excited that somebody else knew all these weird Japanese toys. 2010 came out in 1984. Okay. So, yeah, that would have been real early. Yeah.

Anime wasn't the thing out here. The year we make contact. What is this? It's the sequel to 2001. Wait. How about 2001 is one of my favorite movies. Yeah. How did I not know you were in the sequel?

2000, well, I don't know there. I mean, this is. But like 2010 is very much like it is to 2001 what shock treatment is to the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Everyone goes, there's a sequel? Like, yeah, it's a different vibe. John Lithgow. Mm-hmm. Helen Mirren?

Yeah. Am I ruining you right now? Roy Shider? Roy was great. Oh, God. I love him. Roy played my dad. He was cool.

Bob Balabon. Oh, he's great. Yeah, yeah. I have, I mean, like, I learned to ride my bike going through that, through that, like, space station, and I got to crawl through Hal. It was a good time. You were Christopher Floyd. That was your character's name. Yes, that's correct. Oh, my God, Talison. My mind is blown right now. It's going to, yeah.

I cannot wait to watch this movie. It's a good time. That is what I'm going to be talking about the next episode. I'm going to watch it. I'll watch it with you. I'll talk about it. It's a good time. All right, we'll watch it together.

I'm done. I'm down with it. So yeah, I got really into Japanese toys then, and there was a, there was like toys called St. Sayas. I think I had almost the entire collection of those growing up, which blew my, like, St. Sayah. And there were, like, action figures that had armor. It was based off of cartoon. And the armor would look like different, like, constellations or like there were zodiac ones, which were gold. And then they had, like, Pegasuses, which were, like, silver. And then the, the, like, statue would become armor for the, to the guys, for the action figures.

And the whole cartoon was just lots of melodrama and had weird bisexual undertones, which I kind of dug. It was anime. See, I don't know anime very well, but I feel like that is a common undertone or theme. Oh, well, there's whole genres of anime that are just like, like, gendered staring longingly at people of the same gender or like two men who are extremely effeminate, getting very, very close to each other and almost kissing. And then, yeah, it's. And then... The tension. Oh, yeah.

There's like a French one called the Rose of Versailles with like Marie Antoinette and this, her, like, it's a woman who is actually one of her soldiers named Oscar. And it's a whole... It's a whole thing. Anime goes deep. Anime does go deep. And I'm out of it these days, but when I was in, I was really in. I'm slowly trying to get educated in the world of anime because of all of my friends are into it. Yeah, we may have to do a gentle crash.

course. We're not going to like show you anything that's 400 episodes long, but maybe just a spatter at some point. Yeah. I'm down for that. All right. I'm known for that. So, so like, so you got really big into Japanese toys. Yeah. And they, I, do you think that was like the impetus for you of like, oh, I love this. I love Japan. I want to move to Japan. Um, well, oh boy. God, this is, I'm sorry, I'm throwing a lot of questions at you at once. My first job out of high school was managing a Japanese toy store. What? Yeah. Wait, how have we never known this? So, I had, I mean, like, I started, there was a Japanese toy store in L.A. called the Pony Toy Go Round, and I spent more money at Pony Toig Around at the Honda Plaza.

I wonder what happened to their backstock. I spent so much. Toy Go Round? Magical. Where was it in L.A.? The Honda Plaza in downtown Los Angeles and Little Tokyo. Okay. It's long gone.

but then I managed a store called the Joy Store, which was a Japanese toy store in Beverly Hills. I kid you not on Beverly Drive. Was it popular? Yeah. I mean, I ran it in a very weird way because the owner who is delightful kind of didn't care what I did. So sometimes we would stay open late.

We were right next to, we were across the street from that It's a famous restaurant that was open, like, really, really late and, like, would play, like, a lot of hip-hop music at night. And it was the basis of, like, the $12 milkshake from Pulp Fiction. I cannot remember. I mean, that sounds like a place that was cool. So it was the only cool place in Beverly Hills because Beverly Hills was a nightmare. But, yeah, I had gone full got off. So, like, I would literally be in there, like, dressed all in black with, like, a snake around my neck going, like, whatever.

And we would stay open. If, like, local kids just wanted to play video games. We'd just leave it open. And, I mean... That's so cool. Yeah, we ran the place like a private club. It was nuts. Oh, my God.

And they let me do the buying for a while. And I ended up in Japan because I was... Did other jobs for the owner, including... He was like... So that's how you ended up in Japan. Yeah. I did all sorts of weird stuff for him. I worked for, like, did some... Work for Brutus magazine.

I did some, like... I was a personal assistant for some stuff. And then I bought and imported a lot of Japanese toys to the... the United States before it was a thing, really. That is so cool. Yeah, it was fun. It was really dumb. Do you speak a little bit of Japanese?

I did once. I heard, yeah. Yeah, it's, it, it, last time I was there, it took about two weeks to kind of come back to my brain. But, like, right now it's just, I mean, it's paste. Wow. But, yeah, I loved it out there. It was one of the few times I left L.A. where I was really like, I could stay here and be okay. God, I love Japan so much.

Yeah. Having an apartment was really nice. I spent so much money on stupid things I could not bring back. I feel like I don't really know what like a toy from Japan would even look like. So it could be cool. They are. Because I think we might have something. It might have because those are the ones that really had an emotional.

Connection for you? Yeah. I mean, like, I'll admit, like the rainbow bright ones were pretty heavy on me just because there was the cartoon. and I had, you know, anything with a cartoon kind of hit. But yeah, and they felt special because I was the only kid who had them. Wow. Yeah, that makes sense. My one other friend who was deeply into it.

Yeah. I feel like, like I think there was a period for me where I was into like American Girl dolls. I didn't even know what those were until like 10 years ago. Okay. And so that was a late discovery. But I remember because, yeah, because I wasn't a big toy kid. But I did, I remember went to F.A.O. Schwartz when I was just prime age. So I think I was probably like eight or nine.

And when you go into FEO Schwartz, you're just like, this is heaven, I think. I didn't know it was real. I didn't know it was real either. I thought it was they made it up for the movie big. I did too. And then you go in and you're like, oh, this is a real place. Yeah. And it's glorious.

And I think that's where it probably, I think where I saw American Girl dolls. It was like posh Toys R Us. It was like Toys R Us except like you felt like there was a dress code. Yes. Yeah. I mean, I love Toys R Us. RIP. Yeah, no.

But F.A.O. Schwartz was a different, it was a different thing. Okay. You know what was one of my, probably my favorite. toy was from F.A.O. Schwartz and it was like the cases that you would get, and I feel like this is a very 90s toy, where it was like crayons,

markers, like watercolors, all just in a pack in like a case. And I remember it just that F.A.O. Schwartz all over it. And I was, that I had forever. I keep coming up with like, like,

dumb vibrations I had from F.A.O. Schwartz. It was like, of course, they would put their name on something like that. Yes, of course. It's like the Tiffany's blue box. You'd be like, I went to F.A. O. Schwart, this is how much my parents love me. Yeah. Yeah.

Lord. Oh, my God. You know what to wear another place where I liked getting toys, but they were more so, what's the word I'm looking for? Well, Sharper Image. Anything from Sharper Image? Do you remember Sharper Image? Oh, I had friends who worked at Sharper Image. We would loiter.

Oh my God. They had the coolest shit. They did. Because it was always just like weird little gadgets. That almost worked. That almost worked. They came so, it was almost like ordering something from a back of the comic book where you're like, I wish it did what it claimed to. Yeah.

And it got so close. So close. But I feel like I would like, I would get the sharper image catalog that you would get for free in the mail. And I would sit and eat cereal. and dogier the stuff that I wanted. That in the Sears Christmas catalog, there was just... Oh, magic.

What? Just because I love letting the brain get weird here, like, looking back, what did you get out of toys? And like, if you look at them now, like, what do you get out of them? God, what a weird, what an interesting... And not just the ones that, like, you are personally attached to you because it's like a character you played or like a... Yeah.

Or, you know, one. one of our things, but like... That's a... I don't know how to answer that. Yeah. Like, I feel like I... I know. I don't know if it was just, like, having something new and fun that was exciting to have.

But also, I have things, toys that I liked better because of who gave them to me. Mm-hmm. Or... Wow. It was... It was... I am a very... I guess nostalgic, but I'm also sentimental.

Sentimental. I'm very sentimental, which is why I think I keep so much shit, because I can't get rid of it. Yeah. But I've been like that since I was a kid. So even if, like, someone would give me something really silly, like, I can't, nothing on the set that's one of those. But I would just keep it. Like, I didn't really play with my toys. No, it was a, yeah, I had an odd relationship.

A lot of them went missing again because they would either get given to siblings or they went into a storage unit that mysteriously vanished and I'd never gotten a straight answer about where it went. God. Still today a mystery. Were there toys that you wish you had? Yes. Like, there are. Ones that I wish I had again or like that I had back or ones that I never got. Yeah, there were both.

There were a couple white whales. I'm now at the point, though, where I don't necessarily know if I need them or want them. There are a few that if I had, I would definitely be happy to just look at it on a shelf and be happy. I have like a Lego set or two on my shelf that are, you know. God, Lego sets, see, there's some of those new Lego sets that are like, you know, the Frank Lloyd Wright ones or like some of those ones where, my God, I kind of want those. I mean, they're nice, and I also, I'm really big into, like, the aftermarket lights. And so, like. Yeah, you are. Yeah, I'm going to be lighting up. I have the Disney Castle and I'm going to be lighting it up. And I have five minutes of free time, which has not happened yet.

It's been three years. Good luck with that. Thank you. I bought the light kit for it in 2020 and I have not gotten around to it yet. Well. And I, like, I'm big on book nooks and things like that, too. I love that. I love a good book nook.

Well, I feel like we might have some toys. Yeah, this is interesting because. the crew, like, looked at our Sears catalog Christmas. Yeah, because we had talked about our wonderful Max and Will asked us, like, are there toys that we wish we had? And I was, I really was thinking on it. And I'm like, am I wanting, picking these toys out because it's a nostalgic thing of like, oh, some of them I was like, I don't think I had these. But it just gives me such a good feeling, a good memory. Yeah, I mean, it occurred to me that question.

of what you got out of them like a couple days ago. And I've had a feeling, I can't even answer that question yet, but I'm hoping that maybe as we look at some of these things, I'm actually going to get a proper answer out of it. Oh, boy. Will has something here for you. Hi, Will. Oh, no. Whoa.

Whoa, it's so colorful. Oh, boy. What is this? So, this is, I'm trying to remember the technical name for these. It's a TV magazine, and this was a thing. I was, um... What? It was, yeah, it was a, oh, yes, let me show it. I'm so sorry. This is, so this is a magazine they've been publishing, or the couple different kinds of magazines that they publish, which are for little kids in Japan, and they're about whatever show happens to be on television that's very, very exciting today. And of course, I couldn't read as a child in any of it.

Could you ever? No, Japanese is, I mean, like, I could read, I could read, like, the Hiragana and Kata, Kana I got okay with and then I just learned enough kanji to translate video game instructions. Look at this little bear cub. Yeah. Just so happy. So happy with a little Pokemon-y thing. A little Pokemon. So the reason that I would buy these is because they are filled and sometimes they would get super complex with paper toys that you assemble.

So it's a little... Can you take this out and build it? Yeah, like pull it out. Let's see what it is. I'm too scared. And so like every issue would come with like in sometimes super-competes. complex things that had rubber bands and like crazy metal bits. This is such a better magazine than stuff that we had.

Oh, I read highlights for children. This is way better. Highlights was for dentist's office. This is the real deal. That's true. Fuck, goofy. Whoa. So like, who are these?

So I'm going to point out that that I am not up on what's out in Japan and I have not seen this magazine yet, but I will tell you that this is common writer. some new version of Common Rider, which is a show, which is basically a bug power ranger on a motorcycle with a cool belt. Yeah, that belt is cool. I can feel every common rider fan going,

you're an idiot, but fair. Look at that belt. Yeah, see, that's an insect with a belt on a motorcycle. I'd wear the shit out of that. I had one. You did? It would light up, and then you would have to do your pose and, like, you'd vogue and,

get powers. Vogue. Vogue. Vogue. And then transfer into a motorcycle riding bug. So these are

like foil training cards that you get. Wow. Wow. And like this is whatever Power Ranger is going on right now.

Oh, there's new Transformers. There's also the best ads. These are transformers I've never heard of. I don't even know if you can get them in the United States. I would feel like such a badass

knowing like, you know, like all of the kids at the performing art school. I wish I could read Japanese. It's so cool. Yeah, the kids I did know were all actors, too. It was one of those.

But like, yeah, you take these out and then there are instructions. And apparently this one is how to build. It's a robot with a jet. And the jet uses a rubber band to shoot out of the robot. So that is what you have here is a jet that shoots out of a robot. Yes. That is easy enough to assemble that it's for a six-year-old in Japan, which is more like a 10-year-old here. Yes.

but and I think I probably remember just enough Japanese to follow the instructions. Ooh, I also like that the paper, like it's glossy paper and then it goes into that like... Into the we don't care paper. Yeah, the we don't care paper. Yeah, they treat comic books very disposably out there because they publish weekly. So they're like, it's phone book paper. No one cares if you want the good stuff you'll buy it later. But just like look at this graphic design.

Oh, that's Future Boy Conan. Look how cool this looks. Which is, this is Detective Conan, which is like a, boy detective based off Sherlock Holmes. It's really Arthur Conan Doyle. I can't believe I still know what's in here. I'm proud of. Oh, and Laura Bailey, this is Shin Chan who Laura Bailey does the voice of.

Our good friend. Beautiful and wonderful, gloriously talented friend, Laura Bailey. And that's a zoid, if anyone remembers a zoi, which were these little robotic animals that you put together with little rubber pins and they were wind-up toys. Why do I still know all this? It's just stays in there. It's been 30 years since I've looked at one of these. Oh, yeah, and there's some comics on it? Yeah, this I could not possibly know what comics are in here because I'm not that hit.

Wait, so what was this called again? I'm trying, they all had different ones. It was something TV. This particular one was called like TV special, I think. Someone will look at it and write in and tell me. That is so cool. But yeah, it was, and sometimes it would be super thick if like all the parts for the toy required like a box, they would rubber band it with a, and, and put it in plastic.

God. I feel like the toys that you have asked for and sourced are going to be so much cooler than mine because what I'm thinking about, what I wrote down, this is a prime example. Oh, bring it. It's like, yeah, this is, I'm going to build this later and show it off. This is hilarious that that was yours, and this is mine.

I mean, we were both. I've always wanted one of these. Oh, they're fun. Pin art. Because I've always wanted to do it on my face. It's worth it. Have you never done it on your face? Never.

It feels really. Oh, but you know what? What? These are like the tape. This is like the plastic version. It still does it. They're tank. Do they not make the metal ones anymore?

Because they're like. They probably do it. They bend and the metal ones and I can't believe I know this. Like get bendy and snap. Like they get stuck. Yeah, but they also kind of like hurt a little. Just a little. I'm going to do my face.

We can get you a human pin cushion. We can do. How do you feel? Don't, yeah, keep it there. Let me see that your terrible visage. Did it work? Yeah, that's very long- That's very lawnmower, man.

It's a, it's a, you look like you're coming out of a... You know, you would always do your hand. That was, sorry, that was a, that was classic. Classic, yeah. And you would always try and, like, flip people off and then leave it in people's... That feels so good. This was very much a sharper image toy, by the way. I'm telling you, I was a sharper image kit.

Like, I was any kind of, like, well, this is. not like a weird technical toy. No, but like you were, this was a dumb piece of art that your parents would buy and then they would never touch and the kid would never stop playing with it. Feel how good that feels like that. Oh man, it's been so many years. It's already iffy. Oh my God.

I know. It's a such good memory. This is so much better than slime. Hold on. This is, oh my God. Doesn't it feel good? It's a good. It's really like the tactile, like the, when they all fall.

on your face. Here I'm trying to get... This is really some... Yeah, there I'm unhappy. That's cool! It's like, yeah, I wanted a real feeling of unhappiness in my pin portrait.

My... Oh my God. Listen. See, now I don't feel so bad about my... My picks for what I really wanted, because... This is sensory. It's sensory. I'm big on sensory shit.

Okay. I love sensory stuff. That's the thing that, that I mean, I will say, and I should have brought it, Like the smell of a strawberry shortcake doll. Yes, all of that. Like that stuff. And I've heard that your scent, your smell is your strongest sense memory.

I'm really into, yeah, like I am very big on sense. I collect them. And I mean, I got a scent that's very close to the strawberry shortcake doll of like fake strawberry and plastic. It's 99% there. You are big on sense. I should bring it in a fun. Which I am actually wearing a perfume that you purchased for me for Christmas. Oh, you're wearing the pumpkin pie.

I knew it. I knew it. God, I love that. I love this. This feels so good. It just feels so good. Man. God, oh, you have something else.

I do. What else do we have on the docket? Oh, my God. Okay. Let me do half my face. This is straight up action figure. And I had these. Oh, wow, it is also.

Okay, here we go. Do you guys want to try it? Just feel it. Let's pass it around. Yeah, let's pass it around. You want to try it? Everyone listening at home. Everyone listening at home, if you find your own little pin cushion either in a box or just a pin cushion and press it. Don't press it again.

God, it's really satisfying. Oh, my God. So this is a sectaris. Of course it is. Warriors of Symbion. Cool. I really liked action figures based off of cartoons that barely existed. And I don't even, like, I think they just made a direct-a-video video.

And this was, why am I so insect-bound right now? These were insect fighters, action figures, and this was the Royal Guard. The fun thing I loved about these, other than the fact that they look awesome, is that they would ride insects, like they would have, like, the vehicles were actual puppets. Like, it was a tarantula puppet with a saddle, and then you put the action figure on the shuttle. saddle and then like a dragonfly and a tarantula and then of course since they're toys they make out of course because that's what you do well and then they're puppets so it's even they can get more complicated more real into it more dirty this is like a loki situation up here yeah so he is this this action figure and am i going to do the thing this is a thing i would do to give my friend's

heart attacks okay i'm going to do a thing that i've actually heard friends scream bloody murder Oh. You're going to open it? Yep. And not just open it, but open it with cruelty. Yeah, you opened that with disdain. I did. I had, like, friends would get me, like, limited edition Star Wars figures.

And you would have a lot, and then I'd hear them. They'd like, ooh! See, I was like, I have so many toys that I just never opened. I can't. So that actually felt really good to me. Oh, yeah, no, you should, like, I... Oh, he's got different hands? Yeah, it was very, and like, this poor, wonderful,

chromed guy was very like and he's got like the weird little Loki helmet and they're the size of like a Star Wars figure with like and with like a little more articulation What is this supposed to? They bend. That's like a, that's a weird little Nerf gun. I assume it shoots pesticide because they're insects. I don't know.

That's cool. You know you do naturally, I haven't like played with toys like this in a while. Yeah. You do naturally go into that thing of like Oh yeah You make you make you make you can't help You sound And you know what this is really nice Except now I have to wear my glasses to see them

The metallics It's really shiny They all really had like I like that they were shiny And I like Instead of a centaur it's a sectar It's a sectarus I think I never actually

I don't remember the cartoon that well We gotta put him somewhere We are gonna I think we're gonna Oh my God yeah Well this My grandpa gave me this by the way Not to brag Oh yeah are you bringing down

Your little... Beautiful. It's an automobile. It's a Mercedes-Benz chrome silver. Oh, they're gullwing doors. Like a... That's very fancy. Trunk opens?

Yeah. This was my grandpa gave me this. Oh, man. Because he had a big collection of... I'm definitely... I'm going to add the little extra hands onto this guy. You are? Okay.

And he's got the little holes in the feet so you can stand them up. See, like... Okay. We're going to talk about this. Are you going to bring one? Okay. Okay.

minis, miniatures, oh, mini, mini towns. Oh. Like, that is my favorite thing. So the fact that we're kind of like doing a little bit thing over here like this is

so delightful. And like, oh! Wait, way, where? Oh, no way! You did not get it! You did not! What are you talking about? Okay, I'm not looking.

I'm not looking because I'm over here with the little hands to my action figure. I'm so happy right now You have no idea So I was big into Polly Pocket But they did Poly Pocket give me a little bit What's the notion of it?

Okay so Polly Pocket was like a little toy That was like a Like a Like a locket Like a Like a not a locket Because it was big But you would open it

Like a compact Like a compact Okay And it would have little toys in it And I heard that they made one for Adam's family. Oh, no. This is somewhere where I feel like we've both come together.

This is where we both come together. I love tiny things as well. And I feel like it's a sense of control over my environment, which I know sounds odd. No, that doesn't sound odd to me. And I also always had very expensive taste in furniture. Even when I was young, like nine, and it was just a way to own something nice in Art Deco

as I could get a tiny four-inch version. Of a tiny version of it. A tiny version of the spooky of the spooky couch I wanted. It actually really makes a lot of sense to me that we both like the control thing. Yeah. Like I can control this little tiny environment and feel. It's why I like the play sets, the more I think about it. You guys.

Oh my God, that is stunning. This is so cool. So there's a lot happening here. Oh, my God. I'm looking forward. We're going to have to put it up for everybody. All right. So this is, I mean.

Ironically going to be hard because it's so tiny. And if you're listening, I'm going to put my... I'm going to talk all about this. This is... There we are. An Adams family Polly Pocket. So it is... Oh my God, this is really pretty.

This is so cool. It is a compact, and there are tiny little cute... They look almost like evil doll versions of the Adams family that are about three quarters of an inch tall. Look at this. And there's like one... Like the top side is... like a dollhouse, flat dollhouse two-story mansion.

And then there's the grounds and that's like a cemetery. Get morticia. Yeah, there's a little cemetery. Oh my God. Does the coffin open? The coffin has to open. Yes, the coffin open. Let's go to sleep in there.

Here, let's put it. Yeah, we're going to have to display this in a cell. Oh, my. So how are they just staying there? Tugly. He's taking a little nap in there. I mean, inevitably. This is, you guys have just made my dreams come true.

This is amazing. What, see, oh, and then look at this. There's a little hidden door. Oh, they got, they have a hidden door behind a bookcase. And the bookcase itself is about an inch and a half tall. I can't, I can't. You're going to put Gomez behind the bookcase? That's fair.

I lost him. This is so cool. How cool is this? Here we have to. And then look at the front of it. They added a hologram. See, this is like a modern polypocket. Oh, yeah, it's got like a crazy lenticular thing.

Yes. It turns into skeletons. Oh my God. Oh, my God. Are you kidding me with this? This is so cool. I didn't know that this existed. Wait, when did this come out?

I need to know when this came out. Okay, this was actually 2019. So I think Polly Pocket had a bit of a resurgence, I'm going to say. Maybe. You know, I think it might be the control issue, the thing. Like, I'm really, I really think you landed on something with that. Yeah, because I'm feeling it right now. I'm like, I'm looking at this.

and I'm feeling like everything's going to be okay. And I don't think because it's just like... I don't either. I really enjoy it. Oh, boy. This is just like... Oh, no. I want to live in here.

Oh, okay. We'll get into that in a second. Let's get into it. I'm going to put this up. Yeah. I don't know where Gomez went. Like, the action figure, the more I think about it, the more I'm feeling like it's like a comic book thing where I'm just sort of like,

I can, like, I'm looking at that action figure and I'm thinking, like, I can definitely feel myself identifying with it in an interesting, fantastical way. Like, do you feel like it's pulling you back to when you were a kid and having memories again? I feel like it makes me want to be a insect night. I don't know. I want that outfit, and I feel like that outfit comes with some level of power. So doing this is like bringing back you're feeling like your imagination is starting again? Yeah, I mean, very much, like, this is interesting. I was hoping that this would inspire some feelings because I don't buy a lot of toys anymore.

You don't have feelings? Because I don't have feelings anymore. Honestly, it's actually more just room. And, yeah. Space. I only buy toys based off things I work on is my rule is I will buy a toy if I did the voice in a cartoon or something like that. That's a good rule. It keeps it low key.

Yeah. But yeah, there's something, there is something weirdly connective to it. The more I think about it, the more it's sending me somewhere else, kind of like reading a good book. There's a little note with this. There's a note on this. Okay, we're going to get into a very weird thing that I was very. This is something I owned. I owned one of these years ago.

This was like I bought one of these right or I was given it right after I quit acting or a little bit after. There is a photograph. Oh, my God. This is amazing. This photograph. This is from the... So this is a Japanese toy. Okay.

There is two little beautiful paper cranes. This is a present for you, happy face. The Japanese kanji for crane called Happiness and Long Life. Thank you from Mitt. Talison, how too? Hello. Two little paper cranes and a wonderful picture, which I don't know if I can show. I would love happiness.

who sold this to me in a like sitting in a in a commot I'm like just this really delightful I feel even better about this that this got purchased because these are old and so

this is this is called this is from another kind of magazine thing from Japan called Gakken and it was a series of science toys for kids and they would make crazy ones there was one that was a

wax cylinder player that you would build except instead of a wax cylinder it would use plastic cups like party cups and you could record by scratching into the party cup if you like blasted music at it

and it was I mean it worked okay and this one's amazing this one is an automata like they actually made little humanoid mechanized dolls that did things. This is based off of a real historical one. And it's a little historical

Japanese doll. Get that baby out of there. It serves tea. It does? Yeah. Or do you need some... This automatic doll is restored according to the Karakuri-Zui and is... Yeah, this is a whole thing.

Do you need this to stab in there? I do need to stab something. I love this. I loved feeling, especially once my hands started to go, the sense of accomplishment over building something is, like, because I used to do model kits and then my hands went and I had to stop. Like I even built models professionally for a little while, sort of. That's a story for another time. Whoa.

But this is like a whole thing that you build. So it's a kit. I know. I got a lot of kits. which is weird to show off. But it is... I'm going to find the head of the doll. This was actually...

Oh my God. How fun this would be to build. Oh, yeah. I'm going to have to build it and show it off. You can still find these online every now. And every now and then they're cheap. But... Look at the little claw?

It's a... The doll, when you build it, has a little cup of tea. And it's a wind-up toy that goes over with the cup of tea. And then when you take the cup of tea, it leaves. Oh, my God. It is, it is. And I have always been fascinated by, by old robots, old, like, automata, any attempt to make a robot from, like, the 19th century. But this is so beautifully made. Yeah. Well, I mean, like, and they had one that was an archery one that I had, where it was a little robot that would actually pull back and fire an arrow and then pick up another arrow and fire it, and it would do, like, five in a row.

Oh, my God. I can't wait to build this and put this up. Yeah, this is bigger than I thought it was going to be. This Karakuri doll can be said to be one of the original forms of modern robot. Karakuri means the mechanism that drives a machine. The only existing illustrated manual written in the Edo period, it approaches a guest holding a cup of tea in its hands and clears away the teacup when it becomes empty. This is going to be delightful, and I'm going to build this. I'm going to be forced to build it because this is content. and we will build it and show off this.

I'm going to have to put it on the set. That is so cool. And it's also a doll, so you get to, you get to dress it up with these phenomenal, I'm so excited. Amazing. This is going to be delightful.

Oh my God, I can't wait to see this built. I know. I was really into building little things. This is, oh, no way. I wanted one of these. Okay. So bad.

Okay. This feels really, This really feels like Christmas. We've gone from robots onto... A glowworm. On to glowworm. I've always wanted a glow worm. It might be used.

I don't care. At this point, I would be surprised if it wasn't used. So the question is, does it have batteries? Where do you put the batteries? There's usually a little... Wow, this is so weird looking inside? I try not to think about... It just opens, and then the head is hollow.

Yeah, where the gut should be there's... hide your dregs. Is that what a glowworm? That's why they call it a glowworm. Hey. Oh. I want to see if there's batteries in here. If we can, like, I'm going to find the battery.

I love the difference between the toys that we both asked for. Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, I've got some stuff that also that I put on my list that veers into this direction. I think that they were, because I also love like these little things, but I think they went for, for contrast. And I appreciate that. I love it. Because I get to live some of my weird... But I was big into kits as a kid, too, but those science kits of, like,

crystals and growing, you know. I get them. I actually have some crystals I grew on the set right now, which is the ones surrounding the bird skull. No way. Yeah, that was, I saw people doing that and was like, I can grow crystals on bird skulls. And sure enough, I was right. This is just, I... What is this doing for me right now?

What is this doing for you right now? I mean, it's a shape. I'm going to do a thing. Let him, uh, oh yeah, there you go. There's your little glow warm. See, the thing is it's bright in here. Yeah, and I'm also using an iPhone to try and make that. So these things were famous because they would have like a light up at night.

It was your own little. It would light up at night, and I remember it was just this really gentle glow. A nice yellow light. Just like be a little night light for you. Were you ever afraid of the dark? Oh, oh my God. I was such a phobic child. You feel like you still are?

No. I got over that after some intense mental issues. I was afraid of a lot. I was agoraphobic. I was afraid of the dark. I was afraid of deep water. I mean, I was afraid of like going into the bath. I was very phobic.

I got over a lot of it. Little talism. I had damage, man. Yeah. Yeah, I got over. They tried to get me to not be afraid of the dark. And it took becoming a teenager. I fainted on pirates of the Caribbean as a child.

I got so scared. I literally, they had to carry me out one of the emergency exits before the ride was over. No way. Oh, you poor little thing. I fainted on pirates of the Caribbean. Because you were so scared. The two drops started it off. And then once there was a pirate on a pirate ship, that was the end of me.

You were done. And I was out like a light. Oh, my God. This is so funny to know. about you because of how much you love Disneyland. I do. And how much you love those rocks? Despite Disneyland hurt me and I still love it.

You powered through. I did. It took a while. I couldn't do roller coasters at all. I was really, I was not a child who felt safe ever. I got over it. Yeah. Pretty hard other than a few.

I mean, again, there will be other episodes for that level of mental damage. Oh, well, we have a, we have, we have, we have, an episode in particular that I'm very excited. Well, a couple actually that I'm excited to talk about some things. The more I look at it. We're going to get a little deep. We are. I mean, even right here.

We're starting easy with you all. I feel like a lot of control issues here with toys. Oh, you think? I mean, I didn't. You think you and I may have some control issues here on this set? I wonder if this is everybody. I mean, like, I'm looking at the, like, sometimes it's art. Like, when I'm older now, I'll look at it and it's beautiful.

Like, a action figure. or the statues from sideshow that I get or they represent a comic book character that I really identify with. But like this, everything in here feels like control to me. Like comfort. I feel like you,

you touched on something. Yeah. This was an interesting experiment for us. Yeah, I've never, this is something, I mean, not that my house can take more things, but this is definitely, this is stirring something inside. Yeah, me too. Yeah, this is lightning my agoraphobia just a little bit.

This is not lightning mine. That's fair. Because I'm an raging agoraphob, but, you know, listen. Hey, there's- This is unlocking something. There's no way to be snuck up on in a polypocket brooch. There's just, like, the house in the back, it doesn't go anywhere. This is a prime spot for me.

I love the little man-eating clan. God, I love it. Yeah, I... I'm also really curious if I can build one of these with my shaking hands at this point. We can do it and I'll help you. Yeah. Oh, that would be amazing. Yeah, we'll do it.

Yeah, let's watch some stupid movies and build a model. Let's watch 2010 and build a model. I'm down. We'll pick one of yours too. All right. I want to see child you performing like a train seal. All right. And you get to watch me perform like a train seal.

Listen, I feel like we learned so much. today. We did. And it was so enjoyable and fun for us. Oh. What is that? You have another toy? Do we have mail? Is that? Oh, we have mail today. I... Who did we get mail from? I am delighted by this strange. There's a llama on that, on that mail train. Oh, he has his own stamp. Oh, and MFG. I didn't know you could have a stamp if you were still alive. Dave Hewaves has a stamp. Maybe he's beyond life or death. Let's open this up.

That's how you rip. You rip. Oh my God. We have a theme song. All right, we're going to play that. And it looks like there's a letter in here. Oh my God. Look at this.

All right. I'm dying. We have a little. letter. What handwriting? Should I read it? Yeah. Ahoy, Ashley and Talison. My! What an exciting pursuit you've requested of me! I must say, I am flattered and delighted to take on the task. In fact, your timing is impeccable. I've just returned from a galactic romp through space and time!

And let me tell you, these weirdos, oddballs, and outsiders you speak of are my people. Their energy resonates with mine, and it would be an absolute pleasure to compose an anthem to honor every weird kid near and far. Here, let me see what I can cook up in the sonic kitchen. Oh! I hear it. Okay, great.

I just recorded a catchy little jungle for you. Or jingle. Probably a jingle. Yeah, probably. Go ahead and insert this cassette tape into your boom box and let this anthem inspire you to stay cosmic, stay proud, and stay weird. Power up, Dave Heatwave. I haven't gotten a mixtape since I was in high school.

We got a mixed tape, talism? Okay, we have a tape player. This is how we showed love when I was young. This feels like Christmas. This is so exciting. Do we have a... Do we have a tape player? I was like, I know we have a CD player.

CD Walkman, I didn't know. Oh, wow. Okay, okay. You do the honors, because... You're the president of the fan club. I'm your number one fan, Dave, heatwave. I'm like top 12. Are we ready for this?

I might be higher soon. Yeah, let's do this. Is this how we go out? I think it is. Let's go out with a, since we don't, like, yeah, let's go out with this. All right. Ready? Yeah.

I'm into this. Yeah, I like it. Yeah, no. This is good. One to the 80s. Let's make sure we get better service. Oh, that's fair. Yeah, man.

And Kids is filmed in front of a live studio audience. That live studio audience is the producers of the show, Maxwell James and Will Lamborn. Athena Ross, technical director. Our talented camera and lighting team of Mike Schmidt, Eric Thompson, and Nate Corey Smith. Parker Smith, associate producer and winner of Best Weird Kid Employee. Chris Wilmot, audio and sound engineering. Opening credit sequence by Max Shapiro. Weird Kid's theme song by Dave Heatwave.

Production designer Knoxweiler Berth. Set decoration by Monica Siegel. Editing by Will Lambourne. Creative director, Marisha Ray. Quality control technician Catherine Zimmerman. Head of production, Vinnie Singh. Production coordinator, Jeremiah Rivas. And a cast of thousands.

Thank you so much for watching and or listening from the bottom of our reptilian hearts. Come hang with us and sit at our table anytime.