Daily Motivations - 35 HARSH TRUTHS NOBODY WANTS TO ADMIT! Brutally
Episode Date: July 11, 202535 HARSH TRUTHS NOBODY WANTS TO ADMIT! Brutally honest advice from the man who makes millionaires. One of the Best Motivational Speeches featuring Alex Hormozi. Speaker: Alex Hormozi Alex Hormozi is... a first-generation Iranian-American entrepreneur, investor, and philanthropist. In 2013, he started his first brick-and-mortar business. Within three years, he successfully scaled his business to six locations. He then sold his locations to transition to the turnaround business. From there, he spent two years turning 32+ brick & mortar businesses around using the same model that made his privately owned locations successful. After that experience, he packaged his process into a licensing model that scaled to over 4000+ locations in 4 years. Over that same four-year period, he founded and scaled three other companies to $120M+ in cumulative sales across four different industries without taking on outside capital. He has scaled and exited 7 companies. His most notable exit was the majority sale of his licensing company for $46.2M in 2021.
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When you think about businesses that are selling through the roof, all birds, skims, sure,
you think about a great product, a cool brand, and brilliant marketing.
But an often overlooked secret is actually the businesses behind the business making
selling and for the shoppers buying simple.
For millions of businesses, that business is Shopify.
Nobody does selling better than Shopify, home of the number one checkout on the planet.
And the not-so-secret secret, with ShopPay, that boosts conversions up to 50%,
meaning way less carts going abandoned and way more sales going...
So if you're into growing your business, your commerce platform better be ready to sell wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling on the web,
in your store, in their feed, and
everywhere in between.
Businesses that sell more sell on Shopify.
Upgrade your business and get the same checkout Skims uses.
Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com slash Audioboom.
All lowercase.
Go to Shopify.com slash Audioboom to upgrade your selling today. Shopify.com slash
audio boom.
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That's Regain.com slash couples pod. God. Sometimes, progress is the W. Like maintaining in some seasons is winning.
This has been my big focus right now.
And I'm not the first person to say this, but just winning the day.
And Bill Ackman had this hard season where he was getting divorced.
He just lost $4 billion.
And he was not him today.
He was earlier on his career.
So, I mean, it was just the worst.
And it was just him today. He was earlier on his career. So, I mean, it was just the worst and it was just a terrible slog.
And he said one of the difficult parts about that period is that there was no one thing that was like,
oh, I can tackle this today.
Like you're not going to finish the divorce today.
You're not going to undo the four billion dollar loss today.
And so it's like when you have these larger, more complex negative things that do scale.
It's like, how do you how like, how do you navigate through that?
And for anyone who's listening right now,
it's like, maybe it's the bad breakup,
or maybe you're getting divorced, right?
Or maybe it's like the business isn't working
the way you want, and there's like 10 things
that you have to fix.
And so he had this very tactical advice,
which I liked a lot, which is,
he just tried to make progress, and that was it.
And he said, in a day, it's almost negligible, right?
But at 30 days, you're like, okay, I moved this.
And at 90, you're like, wow.
Does this mean that our mood is still being dictated by circumstance?
Yes, I'll be honest. Yes, it does.
But I think many of us have this ideal.
We'd love to be in a great mood in the absence of things to be in a great mood about.
But I had this one great podcast today.
I'm going to make that thing the thing that's making this a great day.
And then if I can make that great day, then maybe it could be a great week.
And then trying to expand those, basically let those good moments eat up the season in
actively trying to minimize all the down things and super
super focus on those moments and be like cool I had that good moment that's my
day. Days made and I'm trying to even say that more.
Basically I've had to recalibrate my entire scale to how little of a thing
can happen that makes my day. How little of a thing can happen that makes my week.
How little thing can make my month?
How crazy would it be if a year from now I say,
that was a great year.
I'm putting a huge amount of my discretionary effort
into this because it's my belief that right now,
what will prevent me from achieving my ultimate goals,
because that mother fucker's not gone,
is running out of steam because I don't need to do this.
Like, I don't need to work this hard.
I have to, I'd prefer to, make the ride more enjoyable.
Realize it never mattered to begin with.
What's that?
When you think about businesses
that are selling through the roof,
Allbirds, Skims, sure, you think about businesses that are selling through the roof, all birds, skims, sure,
you think about a great product, a cool brand, and brilliant marketing.
But an often overlooked secret is actually the businesses behind the business making
selling and for the shoppers buying simple.
For millions of businesses, that business is Shopify.
Nobody does selling better than Shopify, home of the number one checkout on the planet.
And the not-so-secret secret, with ShopPay, that boosts conversions up to 50%, meaning
way less carts going abandoned and way more sales going...
So if you're into growing your business, your commerce platform better be ready to sell
wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling on the web, in your store, in their feed, and everywhere in between.
Businesses that sell more, sell on Shopify.
Upgrade your business and get the same checkout Skims uses.
Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash audio boom.
All lowercase.
Go to shopify.com slash audio boom to upgrade your selling today.
Shopify.com slash audio boom.
This is an ad by Regain Couples Therapy and features real testimonials.
This was our first time trying therapy, and honestly, it was long overdue.
Looking back, we just wish we had started sooner.
Regain's qualified therapists help couples when they can't get there on their own.
We thought it was intimacy issues, but Andrea helped us uncover a deeper root cause we hadn't even realized was there.
Visit Regain.com slash couples pod to get 10% off your first month. Regain, couples therapy that works.
If you want it all, life will give you nothing.
We're willing to sacrifice everything that we have for the thing that we want.
And then once we get the thing that we want, we want back the things that we sacrificed,
which really just goes to the heart of the human condition, which is we want it all.
And we're not willing to make trades.
And so one of the reasons that I've actually, I would say largely tossed out the deathbed
regrets of most people is that what they do typically is they will have the bias of wanting
the other path they could have taken without considering the cost of that path.
So they say, hey, I was really successful and I did all these things, but you know,
I would give it all up today to have my family.
It's like, well, yeah, but you didn't because you actually chose the path that you're on.
And you weren't willing to do that. But what you are saying right now is that you want it all.
Sure. So does everyone. And so I've had a few moments of clarity over the last year or so.
But we want everything without the cost and everything has a price and you will
never be able to get the sufficient price tag paid on everything to achieve a monocle
of success in any domain unless you are willing to trade from another.
And I think that that has significantly minimized my regret.
We give up our 20s for our 30s, we give up our 30s for our 40s, our 40s for our 50s, and we trade everything we achieved in our 30s, 40s, and 50s to get back to our 20s.
We give up the thing we have most of for the thing that we have least of.
And we give up the thing that we want for the thing that's supposed to get it.
I will become happy when I'm sufficiently successful and I will sacrifice my happiness
in pursuit of success so that I can become sufficiently successful so I can finally be
happy.
We spend our 20s wanting to be richer and older and have a family, then we start that
in our 30s and we gain more wealth and do the family thing and then we get back to get
to our 40s and we've got more responsibilities, we've accumulated all of this stuff and then
we think, God, if only I could go back to my 20s. But you were miserable in your 20s.
You hated it. You had no idea whether you were going to be successful. You were constantly
concerned about money. You were desperately needing validation from all of these people
around you. You were permanently in dissatisfaction about this stuff.
We already know how the movie ends when we go back and say we want to relive it. And
you can't relive it in the same context because uncertainty is the largest part of
the story.
Perhaps golden years can only happen in our memory.
Nobody believes that we're living through a golden era right now.
We never think we're in the good old days.
But the good old days are always down.
I have spent a huge amount of mental resources accepting suffering and not saying that there's something
wrong with something bad. Like a huge amount of mental resources gone to this because I've
been better and faster at correcting the loop of like, oh, I am not happy with this particular
thing and therefore there's something wrong.
So fix the story that I tell myself is supposed to fix this thing.
And that's been super helpful with the addition of everything
that I remember will always be better than it was.
And the nice thing is that there's tons of science
that backs this up, which is that we learn
through reward and punishment.
Punishment fades with time, no matter how bad it was. Like,
you get drunk, you get hungover, you say, I'll never drink again. Seven days later,
you're out drinking again. Why? The punishment of the hangover fades quickly. You are with
somebody for a while, you're like, this bitch is crazy, or this guy is crazy. And then you break
up. And then all of a sudden, what do you remember? The good times. Because reward sticks.
And in some ways, there's a little bit
of a hopeful message there, which is that when you look back
on your life, you will disproportionately
remember the good times, but it only becomes a problem
if you limit the present, which is the only thing
you've ever actually lived in.
When I think about a business and I want to grow it,
for example, I would think, okay, what are all the things
that can destroy this business? And this is Charlie Munger, this isn't me. But basically, for example, I would think, OK, what are all the things that can destroy this business?
And this is Charlie Munger, this isn't me.
But basically, he says, invert always invert.
And Einstein said that too.
And it's because you get to use this way stronger horsepower
engine of, how do I grow my business?
You can obviously think that way.
But the alternative would be, how would I absolutely
destroy this business in the fewest possible moves?
And then when you list out those moves, you're like, cool, now let's do the opposite of that.
And that has been honestly, a lot of the some of the sources of my greatest kind of creative moments have come from these apparently obvious things that would kill us.
Well, what if we did the even more obvious thing and did the opposite of what would destroy us?
And it's worked better than I deserve.
Figure out what you want. Ignore the opinions of others. Do so much work,
it would be unreasonable that you fail. Realize it never mattered to begin with.
Help others once you get there. You've already achieved the things you said would make you
successful. Yeah, the first five steps there is my, is basically my master life plan.
Yeah, the first five steps there is basically my master life plan. I had a pretty terrible first out of college experience of work, but from that I learned
some of the most important life lessons that I still take to this day.
And that boss particularly said one thing to me one day, she said, figuring out what
you want is 99% of it.
She said, once you know what you want, getting it's the easy part.
And I kind of adopted that as a worldview, because it's like, once you're really clear, like this is what I want,
then everything that's not that is what I'm willing to give up to get it.
Now, that thing can change. And I think that's the part that people miss.
And I think we should all have
permission to change what we want in any given moment. And not having basically sunk life
bias of like, I put 10 years into this thing and that's okay. And that's what I needed
to do at that time. And today I'm willing to, I'm going to change everything.
It's been super helpful for me to not think of my changes as permanent.
Because it's allowed me to make such dramatic changes in my life or my business much faster
than I think most people have been willing to because there's this weight of forever
on top of everything.
Like, I can do this for today and tomorrow, if it still works, I will do it for tomorrow.
And if five days from now, or 25 days from now, if I work this way, I then say, you know
what, I need a day.
People are like, oh, he's burned out.
It's like, I took a day because that's what I needed that day.
And I think giving myself permission to have that freedom has allowed me to take significantly
faster action because who am I apologizing to?
When you think about businesses that are selling through the roof, Allbirds, Skims, sure, you
think about a great product, a cool brand, and brilliant marketing.
But an often overlooked secret is actually the businesses behind the business making
selling and for the shoppers buying simple. For millions of businesses, that business is Shopify.
Nobody does selling better than Shopify, home of the number one checkout on the planet.
And the not-so-secret secret, with ShopPay, that boosts conversions up to 50%,
meaning way less carts going abandoned and way more sales going...
So if you're into growing your business, your commerce platform better be ready to sell wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling on the web
in your store, in their feed, and everywhere in between.
Businesses that sell more, sell on Shopify.
Upgrade your business and get the same checkout Skims uses.
Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com slash audio boom.
All lowercase.
Go to Shopify.com slash audio boom
to upgrade your selling today.
Shopify.com slash audio boom.
This is an ad by Regain Couples Therapy
and features real testimonials.
This was our first time trying therapy and honestly, it was long overdue.
Looking back, we just wish we had started sooner.
Regain's qualified therapists help couples when they can't get there on their own.
We thought it was intimacy issues, but Andrea helped us uncover a deeper root cause we hadn't
even realized was there.
Visit Regain.com slash CouplesPod to get 10% off your first month.
Regain powered by better help.
One of my themes this year has been focusing on moments
and on both the positive and the negative.
And so like, when we think back on,
if I think back on last year, right,
I don't remember probably 95% of the year.
Like, I, you know, I did the same things.
And so it's like, it just didn't get recorded. Like nothing notable happened. And so really like when we think about
a year, we really just recall a handful of moments and that's it. And those moments in time are
usually very short. And so I've been trying to think about the bad, you know, seasons as,
well, maybe it wasn't a bad season. Maybe I had five bad days or really five bad moments that I then thought about for
the entire season and turned what would have otherwise been five minutes times five into an
entirely bad year. It's like okay well if we can do that in the negative can we do the positive
which is you know obviously the thing to exercise. I thought about that it's like if I were to boil
everything down of all the skills that you. I thought about that, it's like, if I were to boil everything down
of all the skills that you can learn,
if everything that we do eventually becomes irrelevant,
then the single greatest skill that you can develop
is being in a great mood in the absence
of things to be in a great mood about.
Most people don't question someone who's in a bad mood.
Like, I'm just in a bad mood.
So it's like, well, if you can be in a bad mood for no reason, it's like, you might as well be in a good mood
for no reason, because that one at least serves you. And so I've been trying to exercise like,
because there's on one degree, there's like, let's count things to be grateful for. On the other side,
it's like, why do I have to have things to be grateful for in order to be in a good mood?
Like, why is trying to find things a requirement of being in that mood? Like, can
I not find things and still choose to be in a good mood? Because I've certainly not had
things to be in a bad mood about and been in a bad mood. And so I've been trying to
flex that, which is like, sure, we can find things before and when those things pop up,
yes, and of course, it's a practice, you know, it's a practice, you get better at it. But
like, what if I can just be in a good mood? And so I've just tried to try to break that
that relationship between the two, because then it makes it contingent on something that I can find. To take this to the
absolute extreme, why should I be grateful? Why should I be happy? Why do I demand of my life
that I must be happy during it? I think it comes down to, I used the word control before. Basically,
if you can predict, it means you can control. But if you can predict what's going to happen,
it means that you know what the variables
are and you can influence those variables, which we can influence the outcome. We have
a set of behaviors or skills that will increase the likelihood of goal achievement, whatever
that goal is, being spiritual, being a good husband, whatever it is. These behaviors will
do that. To increase the likelihood of me doing these behaviors, then I have to have
more good stuff, less bad stuff. I will die on that hill.
Beyond that, what is anything that happened
prior to this matter at all, insofar as it only works
if I could use that same variable and then use it again
to change my behavior yet again to be conducive to the goal.
Expectation of life is that it's going to be
until I make the billion dollars,
until I get married to the love of my life,
until I get these things, you're just holding your
happiness hostage until something great happens.
What if something small could be something great?
People only root for others at two times.
First, when they're at the beginning of the race,
second, when they finish.
Neither is when you need it.
So you have to master the middle,
the boring, exhausting, soul-crushing middle.
That's where the winning happens.
On your own.
People will only cheer for you
as long as you can't beat them at the game they value most.
Friendly reminder that every person who doubts you is right until they aren't.
It's a bug, not a feature.
You know, at the very, very beginning people say,
you know, I'm really excited for you that you're trying this thing out, right?
And I noticed that everyone was very happy for me to try because
I temporarily decreased my status. I actually became worse than them during that period
of time. And then as soon as I achieved a level of success, which I then realized that
their happiness for me was proportional to where they were on the ladder relative to
me. And so as soon as I passed some people, then they stopped being happy and then they
start, you know, saying bad things, right?
And the people who were still always ahead were still like, keep it up, keep it up.
And there's still people who have been that way my whole life.
And I just wonder, if and when I pass them, will they flip?
I don't know.
But also to the same degree, it was the it was after you start the race when you're in
the thick of it, because you'll quickly pass the people who've done nothing.
But then you have this long period of time where you don't catch up to the people who've been doing it for a long time and
That's the part where it's very lonely because you don't have your initial your initial posse. You have to leave them at some point
But then you don't get to the new group
That's you know way ahead and actually has some some proof behind them that you can actually like sit at the table
And so like today I have if I were to do something, I have tons of support.
But I don't really need the support now. I need it, I needed it in the middle, right? In the many years that like
no one knew who Alex Ramosi was. And that's the hard part.
And I think it's the story that Morgan Hassell tells, which is that you just don't know how it's gonna finish.
And that's what makes it hard. It's the uncertainty of like, what if I give up everything that I've done in my life for
nothing?
And then all of a sudden, if I knew that, then I wouldn't be willing to make this trade.
But in retrospect, when you do have the thing, you're like, of course I was like, if I knew
that this was going to happen, I would happily make the trade.
But you don't know.
And so you're just putting the money down and they're rolling it. but you get to find out if you hit black five years from now. It's why dealing with uncertainty
is such a meta skill. And it's one that I, to be honest, it's one that I really suck at. I'm very
very not good at dealing with uncertainty. My required line of assurance in order for me to commit to a decision is incredibly
high which is why I've basically never failed at anything that I've done. All of
the stuff that I've done a string of incredibly slow but very reliable
successes is just because my required number of sort of justification points
is very high and you know in retrospect it might look like it was a risk.
It's like, dude, I took so long
to fucking make this decision.
On the friend point, it's a painful realization
that the small number of good friends
want you to win in case you take them with you.
And the large number of bad friends
are scared of you winning in case you leave them behind.
The best way to know who a real friend is, is how they react when you win.
And when that happens, you'll realize how few real friends you really have.
Many people were like, sure, like good luck with that.
But I knew that they just weren't really rooting for me.
They were rooting for me to fail.
They're rooting for me the wrong way.
One of my rules is you should only take advice from people whose dreams for your life are
bigger than yours are, which is a very small number of people.
Sometimes it's your parents.
Sometimes your parents really do have bigger dreams for you than you do.
When you think about businesses that are selling through the roof, Allbirds, Skims, sure, you
think about a great product, a cool brand, and brilliant marketing. But an
often overlooked secret is actually the businesses behind the business, making selling, and for the
shoppers buying, simple. For millions of businesses, that business is Shopify. Nobody does selling
better than Shopify, home of the number one checkout on the planet. And the not-so-secret
secret, with ShopPay, that boosts conversions up to 50%,
meaning way less carts going abandoned
and way more sales going.
So if you're into growing your business,
your commerce platform better be ready to sell
wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling
on the web, in your store, in their feed,
and everywhere in between.
Businesses that sell more, sell on Shopify.
Upgrade your business and get the same check out Skims uses.
Sign up for your $1 per month trial period
at Shopify.com slash audio boom.
All lower case.
Go to Shopify.com slash audio boom
to upgrade your selling today.
Shopify.com slash audio boom. This is an ad by Regain Couples Therapy
and features real testimonials.
This was our first time trying therapy
and honestly, it was long overdue.
Looking back, we just wish we had started sooner.
Regain's qualified therapists help couples
when they can't get there on their own.
We thought it was intimacy issues,
but Andrea helped us uncover a deeper root cause we hadn't even realized was there. help couples when they can't get there on their own. We thought it was intimacy issues,
but Andrea helped us uncover a deeper root cause
we hadn't even realized was there.
Visit Regain.com slash couples pod
to get 10% off your first month.
Regain, couples therapy that works.
The people who are closest to you in the beginning,
if they're like true, like actual friends,
then you recognize that because they actually want you to win
and that's amazing.
A lot of people don't have that. And so what I have felt, at least
for me, was that when you're a little ahead is where the friction is. When you blow them
out of the water and there's no question, like it's beyond reproach, they will do one
of two things. They will either be really happy for you or they'll change the game that
they're beating you at.
That's great, but I'm in better shape.
That's great, but my marriage is better, right?
Like, or whatever, you know, whatever game that they choose to play.
People who doubt you will be right most of the time.
And this further increases your uncertainty about the path that you're choosing to take. But on a long enough time horizon, most people who don't bet are guaranteed to lose.
And so they get to win at being right more times than you get to win at being right.
But what that equation doesn't take into consideration is intensity, which is, can I be so right one time
that it makes all of the times that I was wrong irrelevant? And in the nature of life, the answer
is yes, almost a resounding yes for just about every domain. Like, everyone can say that every
person you've ever dated has sucked and they can predict that you're going to break up until you
find the person that you're going to marry and in that moment
who fucking cares about the other 90 people that you went on dates with that everybody said was a bad idea or that you have a bad picker
You don't have a good taste. It's like well
You're not marrying them. I did in a way that's different than then you would prefer great, but I did end up finding this thing
I the you know, the first thing that I ever did
Was it you know an online an online fitness thing and it kind of worked and then I did my first finding this thing. The first thing that I ever did was an online fitness thing.
And it kind of worked.
And then I did my first gym, and it kind of worked.
And then I started all these other side projects.
I got distracted, and I didn't know.
And the downside risk is significantly smaller and more
frequent.
It's both.
You're more likely to lose, and it's more
likely to happen more times.
It's just that upside is uncapped.
And so, and I think about this one a lot. So there's this story of the guy, do you know the guy who wrote Jingle Bells?
No.
So...
I didn't even know that that was re- I thought it was like Happy Birthday, I thought it was just gifted to humanity when we started.
So there's this guy, he's a- he's a- he has the most tragic life you can imagine.
Just like, did nothing but failed,
was a failed everything.
And his entire life was nothing.
He just happened to write this small thing
called Jingle Bells.
And it has become, you know,
for the number one song in Christmas time,
like maybe globally.
And I think about that life where it's like,
what if I failed at everything,
but then I have one thing
that actually makes a permanent impact.
I was like, would I trade that life for Aristotle's good life, where I amount to nothing, but
the whole time was good?
And this is just one of my eternal battles where I think with myself that I have no answer
for it, to be clear.
But when I'm thinking through the periods where things suck, I'm like, well, maybe I'll
get a jingle bells out of this.
And maybe it'll just take 20 years longer than I thought.
So not taking the shot is like saying,
life, I don't want to scratch off this lottery ticket,
but the lottery ticket's free.
Why would you not scratch it off and try it?
Whatever reasons that we usually give ourselves
in the beginning for why we can't achieve something,
you can almost always find not only just someone, but someone who's achieved world-class levels of success with worse
conditions than you currently have, which then means it's absolutely possible and then the only
thing that it takes to get there is work. When you think about businesses that are selling through the roof, all birds, skims, sure,
you think about a great product, a cool brand, and brilliant marketing.
But an often overlooked secret is actually the businesses behind the business,
making selling and for the shoppers buying simple.
For millions of businesses, that business is Shopify.
Nobody does selling better than Shopify,
home of the number one checkout on the planet.
And the not so secret secret,
with ShopPay, that boosts conversions up to 50%,
meaning way less carts going abandoned and way more sales going.
So if you're into growing your business your commerce platform better be ready to
sell wherever your customers are scrolling or strolling on the web in your
store in their feed and everywhere in between businesses that sell more sell
on Shopify upgrade your business and get the same checkout skims uses sign up This is an ad by Regain Couples Therapy. Let's be honest, loving your partner doesn't mean you always let them down. You can't just let them down.
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