Date Yourself Instead - how to change your life in 30 days.

Episode Date: October 14, 2026

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Being self-aware is the most important thing you could possibly be. This is about you and it's your season and it's your time to get everything you've ever wanted. It's your time to manifest your dream life. I know if you're watching this, you've probably been waiting on something big. You've been waiting to see major changes in your life. And I really do want to help get you there because it's an energy switch. When you become so self-aware of everything you've been doing wrong, you can start to correct everything and start doing everything right.

And that's when everything good comes into your life. When you know the rulebook of energy and how to play by the laws of energy, your life is going to change drastically. I had to really master myself over the last few years. But the last 30 days in particular, I started studying the laws of energy more than ever and really getting clear on the things that were a little bit off in my vibration in order to start attracting really good things into my life. So I'm going to get into it.

I'm going to tell you everything that I've learned. and I'm also going to give you the blueprint on how to get everything you've ever wanted this season. And by the end of the year, you're going to go into 2027, feeling absolutely unstoppable, unrecognizable. And that's all I want for you. And that's all I want for me. So let's do this. Also, by the way, anthropology is the cutest mugs. And yeah, they make me really happy.

Number one is focusing on things that make you happy all of the time. When you feel a little off in your energy, it's because your thoughts, or going to something that's negative. Or your body has been trained and conditioned to feel sadness, anxious, depression, whatever you're going through. You've trained your body that way, most likely through negative thinking. And this could be from childhood. This could be from the people surrounding you.

This could be from your parents. This could be from your friends. It's easy to get used to feeling negative if you're around negative energy. I had to have a conversation recently with my parents about my upbringing and heal that wound. in order to really be at peace with my past. I didn't realize that certain things in my child had had really affected me and bothered me. And my mom didn't even know

that she had affected me that way. So once we cleared the air on that, it felt like I had severed a cord that had been holding me back from my self-worth. The thing about doing this work on healing your energy is that sometimes it's intimidating. Sometimes it's not easy to have those conversations.

But when you approach it from a place of love, and genuine wanting to heal. And you go in knowing that you're doing this for both of you, whether it's a parent, a friend, a romantic partner. When you go in from a place of ease and love and respect and you're not attacking the other person with how you feel, but you're saying, listen, this is something I've been holding onto for months, years,

whatever it is, and I really wanna talk about it because I wanna have a healthy relationship with you. And I wanna grow with you and I want to be the best version of myself with you and I'm sure you want the same same. If you go in from a place of love most of the time, things will lighten up and things will be able to resolve itself. A lot of the times when we go into situations when we're feeling hurt or abandoned or rejected or we feel like, you know, that person didn't give us the love we wanted or the attention we wanted. What happens is we go in from a place of defensiveness and guardedness and

anger or resentment or bitterness and the conversation never goes the way you want it to go because your energy is all scrambled up and your energy isn't in the right. vibrational state. So the first thing I did was clean up my vibration and focus on things, once again, that made me happy before I went into any conversations with anyone where I felt a little bit of tension or something just didn't feel right. I worked on healing the relationship with myself, and then I approached the people in my life, my mom, whatever. But it's a little bit personal to talk about that. But also, it's important because I feel like a lot of people can relate to that, where maybe one of your parents or a family member or the person you're married to or your best friend or

whatever, someone you've known for your whole life, if you feel like you haven't fully expressed your truth of that person, it could be holding you back energetically from attracting amazing things into your life because any sense of like tension, negativity, anger stored in the body can create blockages energetically. So the other beautiful thing about this is I've seen the progress in my healing and the people in my life have also healed because I healed because everything in life is a mirror and everyone in every relationship in your life is reflecting back to you where you're vibrating at. In the past, I would have blamed my parents or this person I was seeing for all of the bad things or all of the like toxic things and traits that they have when in reality they can only show you where you're vibrating at. So I also

had toxic things that I needed to work on. A lot of this work is about accountability and I spent time really getting clear on where I was vibrating at and what I was putting my attention on and my focus on. And as I started to focus on the things that made me happy and truly lighted me up, I started easing up my vibration and I started cleaning up the things inside of my vibration that were holding me back and making me feel stuck or making me feel angry or upset and bitter. And I started turning those feelings into compassion, into calm, into peace, into love. The beauty about doing this work for yourself is that it really does reflect in every other part of your life. And it's not just about relationships.

It reflects in your business. It reflects in money. It reflects in your day-to-day interactions, everything. So number one is once again, as I just said, but I want to like make it very clear because it's so important. Focusing on the things that light you up and bring you joy and make you happy. And not allowing the things that have hurt you from your past dictate. your current vibrational state, meaning you're not walking around thinking about what that person did to you and holding it in and like holding all that tension and bitterness in, holding that jealousy in,

holding that resentment in. That's hurting you. That's poisoning you. Holding onto anger, holding onto negative emotions is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. I just looked that quote up because I didn't want to mess it up. But it's the truest thing in the world. okay if you're holding onto those emotions you're really just hurting yourself that's number one getting clear on where your brain's at and then redirecting your focus number two is tied into this and it's taking full accountability for where you've made mistakes and showering your past mistakes with gratitude and love and compassion for your past mistakes because what happens is you mess up you make the wrong choices you married the wrong person. You got into a toxic situation. You signed up for a job that drained your life force.

You spent a lot of money on things that weren't necessary. And now you're in a tricky financial situation. Number two is about looking at your past objectively from a very objective lens and saying, okay, I see what I did wrong. Maybe I've made mistakes. But that doesn't define my future at all. And I'm going to walk into this next era of my life as a brand new human being. and what I did in the past is no longer relevant because you can't change that. You cannot change the past. So what's the point of getting so hung up on the past and caught up on what I did a year ago, two years ago, or better yet, if you can relate to this, maybe you can because you found

me when you were going through a breakup or whatever. I spent my whole life chasing down the wrong guys. I was always trying to prove something to guys that were unavailable because I felt like I needed to prove my worth to these guys. Now, I'm going to blow your mind with this. Everything is connected. So when I really looked within and I became more self-aware of the pattern and of what was going on inside of me, I felt like I had to prove my self-worth with everything in life. It wasn't just about guys. It was about my work, my career, my presence online. If people liked my content, if people liked my podcast, if people liked who I was when I met them in person, I would do this

with my relationships. I would do this with work. I would do this with everything over the last few years in particular. And I finally just stopped and I was like, what am I doing? What am I doing? Who am I doing this for? What am I trying to prove? Who am I trying to prove my worth to? I have my worth. I was born with worth. Like, I am worthy without any of this. I am worthy without a partner. I am worthy without being at the top of my career. I am worthy of everything. Now, do I want to be the number one? podcast in the world. Do I want to meet the love of my life and get married like tomorrow? Yes, of course. But you have to understand that you can't build it from a low self-worth and use those external things to validate your self-worth because it's never going to be sustainable.

It's never going to be sustainable if you're building on a shaky foundation with yourself. It can't be. Energetically, it can't last. Nothing is going to last if you're always building and coming from a place of desperation and neediness and insecurity and needing to prove your worth, that's not going to work. So what you have to get clear on is, do you really believe you're worthy now? Do you really believe that? As I said, this inner work and being self-aware is deep. It's deep shit, okay?

You have to get really honest with yourself and take off the mask and be like, all right, how would I feel if no one texted me today? How would I feel if I didn't have any dates lined up this week? How would I feel if it was just me, myself, and I, without any external validation? If you master feeling amazing without the external validation, you're going to be able to master every area of your life. You're going to be able to manifest at high lightning, electrifying speed because you've mastered yourself alone. That's something that I had to recognize at 33 years old and be like, it's not too late for anyone to start again. And it's definitely

not too late for me to start again. I forgive my past self. I forgive me living in survival mode, always needing the next thing to give me a dopamine rush. I forgive that version of me because it was all I knew and it was something I learned from childhood. And I can change now. I can heal now and change my entire life and get everything I've ever wanted and manifest my soulmate and true love and abundance and millions of dollars and everything I want. I have like really big goals. But that's another thing. Number three, not being afraid to dream as big as humanly possible. I used to make my goals smaller around other people to make sure that they felt comfortable. I used to not speak highly of myself and my accomplishments around people or my parents

because they would be like, you're crazy. If I said, I want to make $10 million, they'd be like, you're crazy. Like, what are you thinking? But I'm like, I'm thinking big. I'm always thinking big. Life is short. I don't care. In my brain and my reality and my range. And my rainbows and butterflies delusional land that I live in, that's the world that I love to be in. And I don't care what anyone else thinks anymore. I want to dream as big as humanly possible. For some people, that might be too much. But I am a believer in dreaming as big as possible. And I see the potential in everyone. And I know that if I can put my mind to something, you could put your mind to something and do the same thing. You could do the same exact thing.

You could manifest everything you've ever wanted. Now, do I need millions of dollars to be happy? I initially was operating from that state. And what ended up happening was I would self-sabotage and I would spend all my money because I was living in a state of survival once again and I would self-sabotage with my finances. And so I would make a ton of money so I knew it was possible.

And then I would not be financially responsible with it. I didn't feel safe in my container to hold large amounts of wealth. And it applies to everything. As I said, it replied to my relationships too. I didn't feel safe to hold. healthy love. It didn't feel safe to me. Stability didn't feel safe to me because when I was younger, I grew up once again in a state of stress and hypervigilance. That's the key is once you heal that,

every area of your life heals. The point is, your dreams are achievable. Your dreams are real. And you shouldn't suppress them, but you should always build them from a state of ease and stability. and knowing that they're yours without the feeling of panic because that feeling of panic is going to block and self-sabotage everything in your life if you're operating from constant panic and high stress. If you build from a state of calm and you build knowing that what you want is already yours, it is the biggest game changer and you're going to see major, major shifts in your life in every aspect.

The next part about this is, and this is everything that I'm going to be talking about in my new masterclass. I'm not sure when I'm releasing it yet. I'm deciding whether I wanted to be a live challenge where everyone's together and talking in a chat and like doing it together. Or it's a master class where you could just go in and take it at your own pace.

If you guys are interested in a live challenge, let me know. But also I'm thinking about doing just the standard master class. So let me know what you'd be interested in or if you'd be interested in more of a community as you're taking a course. So number four is You have to get really good at romanticizing yourself and your life and loving every part of your life. If you want to attract everything you've ever wanted, you have to live as the person that already has everything

you've ever wanted. That's the name of the game. That's the laws of energy. You have to live from the end state. As Neville Goddard says, you can watch the videos on YouTube, but he talks about this, living in the end. And that's what living in the end is. It's living as if the love of your life is sitting next to you. It's living as if you are the richest person in the world. It's living as if the manifestation has arrived. So what would you be doing from that state? You're not living from a state of begging the universe for what you want or desperation or stress or disappointment or resentment or anger that it's not worked out for you yet. Those are very low vibe emotions. And if you're carrying yourself around in those states every single day, you're going to just attract more things that

are at that vibration. You have to live as if you have everything you've ever wanted. Point blank. That's it. And there will be days where it's easy to slip back and be like, oh, like, I don't get why this isn't happening for me. It's been so long. But just like quickly correct it. Like quickly, like, nope, I'm not thinking that way. It's happening. It's done. It's already aligned for me. Everything's lining up for me. Everything is working out perfectly in my favor. It's all going to work out. Everything is fine. I get everything I want. Now, this ties back into the first part of this video where I was talking about feeling good. You have to focus on things that make you feel good and it will ease up those thoughts of like, where is it? Where is it? I need it. I need it. That's going to ease everything up.

So keep focusing on things that make you feel good and bring more joy into your life. Okay. I do as much as I can now to feel good. I have my days for sure. For the most part, I focus on the things that make me happy. I surround myself with dogs. I have my coffee in the morning and I don't talk to anyone because I need my time in the morning. I make sure my bed sheets are always clean and smell amazing. I like doing things that bring me peace, that bring me joy.

I love getting my frozen yogurt every single day. I love getting my nails done. I love meditating and like going in and just like clearing anything out and then you feel amazing the rest of the day. I love just doing things that bring me peace. The reason why most things aren't manifesting as fast as you want them to is because there's a piece of you that's like asking for it and like holding it in the vortex. Like in your field, you're holding it down with your own energy. When you feel like you're at peace, you're going to be able to lighten up and allow beautiful.

things to rush into your life. That concludes today's video. Thank you guys as always for being here for listening, for supporting the podcast, for sharing on Instagram. My Instagram is at list, L-Y-S-S. If you want to go there, tag me on your story, send me a message. Let me know how you're enjoying these episodes, even if I don't respond right away. I'm always on reading the messages that you guys send me and it doesn't go unnoticed. I'm so appreciative. I love you guys so much. Thanks again. Have an amazing day and stay tuned for future videos. Bye.