Date Yourself Instead - How to hold your standards and respect yourself - you're not "bitchy", you just KNOW YOUR WORTH.

Episode Date: June 3, 2025

You're not bitchy, you're not mean, you're not asking for too much. You just know your worth and refuse to settle for bad behavior. When you hold your standards, people respect you more. DETACH. FOR REAL. ⁠⁠ACCESS HERE NOW.https://stan.store/dateyourselfinstead/p/daretodetachDARE TO DETACH - LAST WEEK TO ACCESS, EVER.DOORS CLOSE THIS WEEK…If you're still stuck on them, still chasing, still overanalyzing - you're delaying everything that's meant for you.The man. The money. The mission.Clinging is a form of self-abandonment.Detachment is self-respect.⁠Tap here - last chance to download from anywhere worldwide.⁠Learn how to cut the cord, reclaim your power, and become unavailable for anything that doesn't meet your standard.No more waiting. No more begging.It's now or stay stuck.See you there, xo. Lyss <3

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Download it now. Now let's dive into today's episode, which is all about why men love powerful women, why men love powerful, confident women that stand their ground, that hold their standards, and why you should always hold your standards high and be proud of them and know your worth and know your boundaries and know where you stand

when it comes to your fucking value. On today's episode, I'm going to tell you why it is so crucial, it is so important to set the standards of what you want out of your relationships, what you expect out of people, and how to remain in your power. So when someone who doesn't deserve you comes into your timeline again,

or comes into your energetic space, you're able to quickly cut the cord immediately, no questions asked, and you don't doubt yourself, you don't hesitate, you're able to quickly cut the cord immediately, no questions asked. And you don't doubt yourself, you don't hesitate. You don't think, oh, what if they change? Maybe I'll give them a second, third chance. No, okay, there's no second or third chances when it comes to your value and your worth

and how fucking magnetic and special you are. You are so, so, so special. And you deserve to be loved the way you love. You deserve to be treated the way you treat people. If you're listening to this podcast, I'm sure you've probably been through a lot. I'm sure you've had a lot of dating experiences. I'm sure you've had heartbreak,

you're going through a breakup, you're going through a loss, you've experienced grief before. You don't need any more of that, okay? The next person that tries to mess with your energy, it's done. There's no time to waste. There's no chances. There was a very popular episode

that was downloaded many, many times called How to Stop Being Too Nice. And it was inspired by a situationship type of thing that I was in for a few months with someone who love bombed me and someone who promised me all of these things and then didn't deliver. And it lit a fire in me.

And it really kind of propelled this new era of the podcast and this new era of my life, because that's when I left New York, that's when I moved to Bali for a bit, that's when I committed to the healing process and really committed to taking care of myself. That's why I always say, even though, you know, some people may not appreciate you,

they may drop off the map, they may ghost you, they may love bomb you and disappear, they're all here to activate you to the next level of your life. They're all here to teach you something so you can grow, heal, and uplevel and not go through the same mistakes again. So this episode is gonna be a part two of that, essentially,

because there was a situation where there was this guy that I met on the street here in London and I'm very selective with who I interact with in terms of dating. I hate dating apps. I don't talk to people unless I see some sort of potential in them as far as dating, okay? I don't talk to people unless I see some sort of potential in them as far as dating. Okay, I don't waste my time anymore. I'm very, very careful and selective who I allow into my

energetic space. But this guy took a liking to me. He saw me out on the street. He was staring me down. He clearly thought I was attractive. And we ended up connecting. and then he kept making a plan or trying to make a plan with me and then he would disappear and it happened on several occasions where he's like I would love to see you I would love to meet up with you and then he would flake and disappear. At first I didn't really care because I wasn't sure if I was even interested but then he flaked more than once. I was like, absolutely not. Absolutely not. It's absolutely disrespectful when you try to make a plan with someone and they say they want to make a plan with you and then they don't follow through. So we were going back and forth for a bit and I

was like, what's your deal? Like, what's your deal? I don't have time for childish games. And I don't because I don't really date unless it's intentional. And I'm not gonna really give my energy or speak to someone or even communicate with them or even send a text to them if they're not gonna make the plan and set the plan. If someone's not making a plan with you

within the first 48 hours of interacting with you, I really truly believe that they're not that interested. Based off of my experience, based off of what I've heard, seen, spoken of, many couples, many relationships, if someone's not initiating and setting the plan, they have someone else or they're not prioritizing dating or they're emotionally unavailable, there's something up.

Because if a man wants to see you, once again, he will move mountains to see you, obviously. You have to be open to receive, you have to be open to dating, you have to be open to dating, you can't be closed off and expect him to push through every barrier you have. You have to also be open and warm and gracious. But if someone is just texting you

and dragging conversations out and going in circles and making excuses and saying they're busy, oh, they have work, they're at the office, they can't meet up at certain times, and they're not setting any type of date or plan, they're wasting your time. They're wasting your time. And I directly knew what was happening.

I'm not a fucking idiot, okay, I wasn't born yesterday. I don't even think this guy knows what I do for work. I don't think he really knows anything about me. I don't, you know, he'll probably never listen to this, but if he does, I don't fucking care. The whole thing was like, don't waste my time, okay? Don't waste my time, because if you start wasting my time, you're gonna suffer the consequences.

If you ever try to get access to me again, there's not gonna be an opportunity for that. There's not gonna be access to me ever again, because I know how valuable time and energy is to me. It's very sacred, especially at this stage of my life. I'm looking for a husband. I'm looking for a soulmate. I'm looking for the love of my life. Well, I'm not really looking, but I'm expecting. If it's not that, it's nothing. It's not going to go anywhere. So I know how I deserve to be treated. And I bumped into him

on the street and he was like, Oh, do you hate me? Or whatever he said, like something along the lines of, are you mad at me? And I said, I just don't like people who waste my time. Bottom line, point blank. I just don't like people who waste my time. And I was polite about it because there's no reason to be angry. I don't have the energy to be angry at someone, but don't waste my time. Bottom line.

Okay. And when you know your worth and you know your standards and how precious your time and energy really is, those people become irrelevant. Those men become irrelevant. Whereas maybe I would have been like, oh, you know, maybe he was busy or maybe this, maybe that a few years ago when I was quote, too nice.

Now I'm like, you know exactly what you're doing. You know exactly what you're doing. And you're self-aware enough to know that you're wasting my fucking time. Because you have no sense of respect for me and my time to solidify a plan. You're trying to drag things out and that's not my thing, that's not my style.

And he knew, okay, but I just wasn't willing to deal with it anymore and lit another fire in me because even that small instance and that small interaction made me realize how men think they can get away with looking at you as a convenience or an option or something they can circle back to later once they've explored other things. And that's just not how it works anymore.

We're not doing that in 2025 moving forward. We're not doing that. And it kind of made me laugh because I was like, he has no idea, you know? It was that feeling of like, oh, you think I'm a sweet, nice, kind girl because on the surface I come off polite, I come off gracious,

but there's a whole other side of me that you're not seeing that will make sure that you never have access to me again, ever again, now that you've done this, because you don't fuck with my energy. It's this concept of like, I used to be a little bit afraid of the perception of people thinking I was bitchy or too much or, you know, mean, I didn't wanna come off mean because in my heart,

I know I'm really, really nice. I'm a really, really good, nice person. And I know that, but I always had this fear if I stood my ground and I got a little fiery and I got a little intense and I spoke my truth that I would come off as mean or bitchy and it would scare people off. But the truth is people will respect you

a thousand times more when you hold your standard and you speak your truth and you're not afraid, you're not afraid to stand up for what you deserve. And the wrong people are gonna run away, of course. The wrong people are gonna be terrified because they're not gonna be able to meet you where you're at. They're not gonna be able to honor your boundaries.

They're not gonna be able to get away with treating you badly. So they're gonna run, they're gonna drop off. But that's a good thing because you don't want them in your space anyway. But the right people will respect you enough to understand your value and rise to meet you if it's meant to be.

That's the truth. Anytime I've been too nice and sweet and accommodating, it's gotten me absolutely fucking nowhere. Point blank, it's gotten me nowhere because people, unfortunately, as much as I wanna believe everyone has the same heart as me, they don't, okay? A lot of people, they use interactions as ego trips.

And I think that's what this guy was doing. I'm almost positive it's what he was doing. He was clearly unavailable for me and inaccessible in a way where he wasn't gonna plan anything. If he didn't plan anything now, he wasn't gonna plan anything in two weeks from now or the week after, it was a waste of my fucking time. And that's why I got so activated.

I don't wanna use the word triggered because I use triggers as portals, as activations. If you've listened to my, how to use triggers to motivate you episode, it's a really good one. You should go listen to that as well. But that's why I got so heated, okay? Because it was so evident that he was using my energy

to fuel his ego. Instead of just be like, hmm, this girl has something that I like, I wanna take her out and get to know her. He was just seeing if I would agree to the plan and then he would disappear. I don't remember ever experiencing something like this. So for me, it was a first.

It's one thing to make a plan, go on a date, and it just doesn't work out. But to have someone make plans and then not follow through on multiple occasions is diabolical. It's calculated. It's literally calculated because they know what they're doing, right?

The first time sometimes things happen if it's like a dire emergency and they can't make the plan, fine. But to repeatedly do this is diabolical because it's calculated. Even though they may say, oh, you know, it's this, it's that, no, no, no, it's calculated. They're intelligent enough to know what they're doing.

So I just said, what's your deal? Like point blank, what's your deal? I'm not wasting my fucking time. And he was like, what do you mean? And I just deleted his number. Right on the spot, I was like, goodbye. I didn't even answer. And I was like, you know what?

It's a perfect thing to talk about. It's a perfect thing to discuss because I think a lot of women listening to this have probably experienced something similar where you feel like this wound of like almost being chosen but not being fully chosen. It's a wound that hits deep because it wasn't about him necessarily,

but as I was reflecting and thinking about it, I was really grasping this concept of what it feels like to be almost chosen. That was something I clearly needed to heal and work through because it did upset me. But then I cleared it and I felt really good. I was like, you know what? The almost chosen energy is something that should be spoken about because it happens where we chase the almost version of what something could be. And we also chase

the excitement of untapped potential. That's what it was for me, because also like I really, full transparency, I have not really dated that much at all since last year, okay? It's been a year and a half, I would say, since I've really opened myself up to dating because I always said, you know, if I'm dating, I'm gonna date intentionally and I wanna date and open my heart up to meeting the love of my life, right?

Like I don't want to go on date after date after date because I've already done that, I've already been there, I've already experienced that chapter of my life. I'm almost 33 now. I really do pray for the real thing. So I'm very intentional with my energy and time. And I think having this little brief blip of a moment where someone tried to waste my time again, it just was like, absolutely fucking not. Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, you're done, it's over. There's no room for conversation.

I never wanna talk to you again. I never wanna interact with you again. If I see you on the street again, best of luck. I don't want anything to do with you, bottom line. And the beauty of this instant detachment mode, which you can learn more about in my masterclass, Dare to Detach, which is all about cutting cords immediately and never looking back.

And it'll give you that fire and that fuel, the way that I'm speaking right now to you guys. The reason I created Dare to Detach in the first place was for moments like this, where instead of getting upset and dwelling in the emotion for too long, you know you're worth enough to snap out of it. You can have a moment where you're upset,

it's human, right? But you don't let it affect the rest of your life or your day or your week or anything. You say, okay, I know my worth, I know my value. That person clearly is not supposed to be a part of my timeline, goodbye. I'm not afraid to walk away immediately, slam the door, and never look back on these silly situations

and these silly people who are emotionally unavailable to me because I know how powerful I am, I know what I deserve, I know what I'm looking for, and I'm gonna hold my fucking standards high and I'm not gonna waver from them no matter what. And that's what Dared to Detach is all about. That's why I created it. The beauty about detachment too is that it sets you free

and it always elevates you to the next level of your life. When you're not afraid to let go of what's holding you back or you're not afraid to let go of people that are treating you a certain way. It always elevates you. It always makes your life better. So after I slammed the door with that, I went out, I took myself out and I met a bunch of new people.

I was socializing. I let it fuel me and activate me to have an amazing fucking night. I networked, I met some cool people. I had an amazing dinner, amazing dinner and drinks, went home, ordered room service, had a chocolate cake cake had a peppermint tea in my bathrobe and I Basked in my own self-love and confidence and I was like this was a perfect night This was great and I trust with all of my heart all of my heart and soul that the man that I've been praying for is

Officially on his way officially on his way and I just keep telling myself that the man that I've been praying for is officially on his way, officially on his way. And I just keep telling myself that. The man that I've been praying for is on his way. I've detached, I've closed the door on anything or anyone that's holding me back, any wounds, any past karmic debt that I needed to pay with dating and relationships, that's all over, okay?

I think I cleared the last wound that I had, which was this like almost chosen, almost feeling, which is a very common feeling that a lot of people have. And I felt so liberated. New level unlocked. That's how I see it. Whenever someone wrongs me, whenever someone does me dirty, or doesn't treat me a certain way, I let it light me up,

fuel me to the next level, and I say new level unlocked. Because I'm holding my standards high, and I'm not wavering. I know my worth. I know how amazing I am. I know my worth, I know how amazing I am. I know my power. And situations like these, they're laughable. People like that, they don't exist in the timeline.

They're not worthy of an ounce of your energy. Not an ounce. If you've recently gone through a situation like this or you've had someone that's tried to waste your time, spin you in circles, make you question your worth, listen to this episode as many times as you need to, okay? Because I am telling you right now, they don't deserve an ounce

of your precious golden goddess energy. They don't. Let it fuel you. Let it activate you. Let it get you to the next level of your life. Let it make you raise your standards even more and set the bar even higher for the person that deserves you. Because the person that deserves you

is never gonna fumble you. The person that deserves you is never gonna treat you badly, okay? They're gonna see your worth, see your value, and adore you and worship you and make you feel good. And they're not gonna make you sit at home and cry. They're not. Okay, so let's dive a little deeper

because this topic I'm actually really passionate about. I was so excited to record this today because I think there's so much wisdom in this little minor experience I had. I gained so much clarity and wisdom from it. So thanks to this creature that tried to fuck with me because I have a lot to say. All right, it's not that men love mean bitchy women,

but in a way they do. And let me explain this, okay? It's not being mean in their perception. You think it's being mean because you wouldn't treat a friend like this, or you wouldn't treat your family like this, right? But it's a little bit different when it comes to dating. It is.

Now, I'm gonna preface this also by saying this is my personal experience, but I've never seen it not be this way. Men are magnetically drawn to women who respect themselves so much that they're not gonna tolerate bullshit. And in your head, you may see it like you're coming off as cold or bitchy if you hold true to your standards.

But you're going to be respected more. The energy of holding your standards and respecting yourself, it often gets mislabeled as mean or bitchy by people who can't handle the energy. People who can't handle you. They're not going to be able to keep up with you anyway, okay? They'll say, oh, you know, you're being bitchy, you're being too much, you're being this, you're being that, but no, you're just respecting yourself. And if someone can't handle that you respect yourself,

they're not the right person, regardless. God wants you to hold your standards and to love yourself the way that he loves you. He wants you to walk in self-worth. He wants you to know who you are, to see yourself the way he sees you and to walk in your worth and know your value at all times. And when you truly perceive yourself and your value

the way that he sees you, a lot of people that aren't right for you or will never be able to see your value will disappear. Or they're gonna freak out, or they're gonna say, oh, you're too much, or, oh, you're asking for too much, oh, your standards are too high, or you're bitchy. But no, that's not what it is.

It's just you knowing your worth. And by really anchoring in that frequency, you're gonna eventually attract someone that can handle you and respect you and see your worth the same way you see it and the same way God sees it. When you stand in your power, you hold your standards even when you're truly tested, like this situation that just happened to me was a huge test and I think I hopefully I think I passed. You're living in your truth and when you live in your truth and you maintain that frequency

and you don't budge, that's when your soulmate comes in. That's when the love of your life comes in that will respect you, that will see your worth, that will understand how to treat you and be able to handle that type of energy that you carry. It's kind of cool too, because my podcast is almost like a diary in a way. It's like a vocal diary because I've

documented a lot of my dating experiences. I've documented a lot of my dating experiences. I've documented a lot of my life experiences with you guys. And I think now I'm documenting the process of really understanding that the person, the love of my life is actually around the corner, is actually so close. And there's been so many symbols and signs and messages and downloads that I've been getting recently about this. One of the downloads

I got was this concept of holding the standard. You're basically holding the standard knowing that your person is literally around the corner. And if you had that person already, would the person that you're dealing with now be relevant? Be honest with yourself. Chances are no. If you had the love of your life who worshiped you, who valued you, who treated you the right way, and who saw you as a divine angel and made you happy, you were happy together and truly in love,

and you were at peace in your heart and soul, would the person you're dealing with right now that's making you feel like shit be relevant No, and this reminds me of the story that I've told on the podcast before I'll tell it again. Just in case you guys there's some people maybe who haven't heard it One of my best friends was dating a guy who wouldn't fully invest in her commit to her She was always giving more it was so obvious from the outside. She was always giving more she was flying to him they lived in two different states and He was doing basically the bare minimum

If not, I don't even know what he was doing for her Honestly, cuz all I remember her telling me was like he doesn't even want to move in with me He barely tells me he loves me like I had to say I love you first There were just so many red flags and I could see she was really unhappy. Even though I'm sure they had some sort of connection at a point, I knew just from seeing the relationship objectively that she deserved so much better.

Once she cut the cord and was brave enough to walk away and she had to end it with him because he wasn't gonna end it with her. Once she did that and some time had passed and she went through the healing process obviously and she went through the breakup grieving process as we do, she met a man shortly after that treated her with so much love, care and respect, didn't play any games with her, it was so easy, it was so effortless, and immediately was up front with his intentions and said, I'm looking to date you, okay? It was seamless and now they're engaged.

That experience, like that situation opened my eyes knowing that one of my best friends went through something like that and was brave enough to let go and trust in the higher plan and then meet someone that checked off every single box for her and treated her like the queen that she is. This man obviously treated her so beautifully

and so different and actually showed up the way she deserves to be shown up for. She started living in her truth, even though it was painful, because sometimes living in your truth, the initial process of letting people go and releasing toxic relationships and moving on from people that you love, it can be scary and it can

be painful because you don't want to, right? You don't want to let go. But she chose to let go and live in her truth and shortly after was rewarded for that. Now she's with the love of her life because she trusted. She trusted in the higher plan. When you tell yourself, I'm godsent, I am the daughter of God, literally, you are godsent. No man defines that. No man defines that or your worth or your value. When you live by that, you're gonna attract someone who sees you the way he sees you. When you stand firm in your standards and what you deserve,

even when it's shaky, even when it's painful, even when it's not what you want to do, because it's not always easy to do it, there's going to be a lot of tests, there's going to be a lot of these fuck boy situations like what I just experienced again, that might throw you off for a second. But when you come back to center and you remind yourself of your power and who you fucking are, you will be rewarded for that, guaranteed. So tying it back to this concept of would this person that you're dealing with now be relevant if you knew there was something better coming? Would they be?

Would they be relevant to you? Probably not. And my friend who's engaged now, after she met her current fiance, she was just like, I can't believe all the people I used to date and how they used to treat me. It's crazy looking back because if I knew what was in store for me and I knew that I was gonna meet

someone that treated me this way, I wouldn't have spent so much time wasted getting upset over those people. Do you know what I mean? So you have to get in that mindset. There's someone on their way for you. There's a man that's so godsent for you and so destined and perfect for you

that all these other bitches, sorry I'm cursing a lot on this episode, oh my god but all these other bitches be irrelevant, okay? Because you hold your standards, you're holding your standards high and you're not gonna settle for anything less than fucking incredible. Standing your ground is everything to a man. Masculine energy is built to lead. It's built to lead. When you're chasing, when you're forcing shit, when you're lowering your standards, you're messing up the polarity of how it's supposed to be. Okay? If you're chasing a man down and you're desperate for him, you're in your

masculine. That's a man's job. Sorry, not sorry. I know there are men who listen and I'm sorry this episode is a little bit catered to the female audience today. I have to speak from personal experience today. You're in your masculine energy if you're chasing a man and you're messing up the polarity.

And that's a little secret that I am going to be talking about in my future detachment classes. If you're looking to get a kickstart in learning about detachment, learning about how energy works, download Dare to Detach, okay? Masculine energy is built to lead and conquer and chase. And if you're the one doing that,

it's just not gonna work. Your relationship isn't gonna work. Long-term, it's not. You can't force it. You gotta be in your grounded, strong, confident, feminine power. And the right people will show up when you hold the standard, when you hold that frequency. If you become overly available and abandon yourself for someone else, you're messing up the polarity. You're not in your feminine. If you're truly in your feminine, what that means is you're in your

power. You're grounded in your power. Goddesses know their worth. They're not going to chase after anyone. They're going to stay grounded in who they are. The right people will rise to meet you that way. That's the only way. You become the magnet. You become the magnet and the right person will show up. It's actually doing less.

It's doing less. When you hold your ground, that is when the world comes to you. When you say no, when you're not afraid to say no, when you know you deserve better, the world comes to you. When you hold your boundaries and you refuse bad behavior, the world comes to you. You have to treat yourself as so valuable

that people have to earn the right to have access to you and your energy. They have to earn the right to have access to you and your energy. They have to earn it and if they continually try to take advantage of your value they don't even have the opportunity to earn it. Okay that's the other thing. If someone doesn't see your value the first time and the second time and the third time they're not ever gonna see it. They're not ever gonna see it. So you have to be brave enough to hold your standards and hold the frequency of a confident, grounded woman and not be afraid to refuse any sort of future gestures

that if someone fumbled you, by the way, when you take Dare to Detach, when you take my master classes, there is a very high probability because it's happened to hundreds of people who have been in the course, where your ex will try to come back into your life, where they're gonna try to gain access to your energy again.

And why does this happen? It's because when you embody detachment and you embody that frequency, what happens is you rise, you're elevating because you're letting go of everything and everyone that's no longer aligned for you. And people feel that, okay? Especially people that you were intimate with,

that you were close with, people feel you cut energy cords. They're gonna feel you detach when you detach, when you do the meditations, when you do the quantum leap exercises, when you're journaling about it, when you do the meditations, when you do the quantum leap exercises, when you're journaling about it, when you're committing to the detachment process and you're not going into it trying to get them back,

you're going into it for yourself, so you move on. There's a difference. A lot of exes have come back when people have taken the course because you're embodying the energy of, I'm not gonna tolerate bullshit anymore. When you embody that frequency, you have to hold it. You can't go back after you embody the new frequency.

Those people shouldn't have access to you ever again because they didn't know how to handle you. Most likely nothing's gonna change the 11th time or the 12th time. So the whole point is to embody detachment and be so grounded in who you are and know your value so deeply that you attract someone that actually can appreciate you.

You get new love, you get new experiences, you get new opportunities. That's the whole point of Dare to Detach. But point being, when you stand your ground and embody the new frequency of detachment and self-love, the world comes to you. The other thing is when you're not afraid to put yourself first, people know. They know that you're putting yourself first.

They know that you're selfish. They know that you respect yourself so much and that you're committed to your purpose and your work and you so much. And they'll respect you more. They'll value you more because you value yourself more. Everything is a mirror. Everything in life is an energetic mirror, including your relationships. If you're putting yourself first, men will love that energy. They'll love that about you. That's not something to be afraid of or shy away from.

You should be putting yourself first. They will respect the fact that you are your number one priority, that you're dating yourself, okay? And this doesn't mean be a bitch as it's coined sometimes. It doesn't mean, you know, be standoffish and never give someone the time of day. It means you put yourself first, you're selective with your energy,

and over time, if that person earns the right to a place in your life, let them show you through their actions that they deserve that place. Bottom line, they have to earn it. They have to earn access to the castle, your castle, because that's just how it should work. When you honor yourself, you honor your mission, you honor your purpose, people respect that.

This is also a reminder to myself because I've spoken about this before. When I was much younger and I was in all these other relationships in my 20s, I would abandon my life for a man. I would. I would abandon my goals. I'd just be like lollygagging around, be like, oh, like I'm in love, I'm in love,

like blah, blah, blah, butterflies, rainbows, bunny rabbits, okay? And I would neglect myself for the sake of a man's love and hoping that he would fill a void in me and my life would just be magical because I had a boyfriend. But the reality is you can give all those feelings to yourself and have someone compliment your life, have someone make you happy and have company

and build a loving relationship with someone by your side, of course, but that shouldn't be your whole life. You should have your own sacred identity. Bottom line, that's the whole brand, you know, dating yourself instead. It's not about being alone. It's not about being, you know, isolated for the rest of your life. We need human connection. We need love, right? But it's about one, surrounding yourself with the right people, the right human beings that can love you properly. And number two is it's knowing how to love yourself so deeply that you meet your energetic match

that can match that frequency, that can appreciate how much you love yourself and compliment it and add value to it. And the last thing I'll say, okay, when you don't put men on a pedestal, and compliment it and add value to it. And the last thing I'll say, okay, when you don't put men on a pedestal, but really anyone on a pedestal, life gets so great and good and exciting.

Life gets so exciting and it gets a lot easier. And I'll tell you why, because when you're selective with your energy and you put yourself as number one, you become the magnet. You don't have to try so hard. You're not impressing anyone. You're not here obsessing.

You're not here wasting your days, wondering if they'll message you, wondering if they'll date you, wondering if they'll commit to you. You are always number one, and therefore you always have something to look forward to. Yourself, loving yourself. You wake up every day and say,

oh, I have this going on today. I'm meeting my friends for coffee. I'm going to work and then I'm gonna journal and then I'm gonna go for a walk and then I'm gonna go to the gym. You have your own energy, your own field, your own space, your own life. You don't put anyone on a pedestal

and that's when everything magical happens because you're not depending on someone else for your happiness. You're not depending on someone else to make you feel a certain way. When your energy says, I like you or I love you, but I don't need you, it's nice that you're next to me. I appreciate you and I adore you

and I think you're amazing, but I don't need you to function as a human being. That's potent. That's powerful. That energy speaks volumes. I like you, but I don't need you. I appreciate you and I think you're an incredible person and I would love to spend the rest of my life with you,

but I don't need you to survive, to wake up in the morning and be happy. That's a potent, powerful energy, okay? So just remember that, because you have standards, because you hold your truth, because you hold your power, that doesn't mean you're a bitch, it doesn't mean you're mean, it just means you love yourself and you know how to date yourself. And with that being said, that concludes today's episode of Date Yourself Instead.

Thank you, thank you as always for listening to the podcast every week. Thank you for the comments on Spotify. Thank you for all the wonderful direct messages I get on Instagram and on the podcast account and on TikTok everywhere. I see everything, the emails. I appreciate you guys more than you know. This community is so incredible. You guys are all just such beautiful souls and I'm so lucky to have so many people

that are such good people listening and tuning in every week. If you haven't already, be sure to check out the master classes, Dare to Detach, and the Mind Body Soul Reset. Doors are closing permanently for the summer on both of those master classes. So I highly, highly, highly recommend you download now

if you have interest in detaching and stepping into your power this summer and reclaiming your throne this summer. There's so much happening. There's so many amazing things coming for the rest of 2025. And I'm really looking forward to it. I'm so excited for what's to come. Thank you again. I love you. I appreciate you and stay tuned for next Monday.