Date Yourself Instead - STARTING OVER FROM ZERO

Episode Date: August 6, 2026

this summer is alllll about starting over in whatever way u choose. it's a new timeline. a total life reset. blank slate. <33substack: https://substack.com/@lyssbosswhy august is the perfect time to reinvent yourself: a blank slate resetin this episode, i'm sharing why i truly believe august is one of the best times of the year to completely reinvent yourself. after moving back to new york from living between london and bali, i've realized so many of us are being pulled toward change right now. i'm talking about my "blank slate theory"—letting go of the old version of yourself, reconnecting with what actually lights you up, and giving yourself permission to start over. i also share how i know when it's time to pivot, why protecting your energy matters so much, and the exact steps i'd take if i were resetting my life from scratch today—from a digital detox and cutting ties with the past to breaking old patterns, choosing one big goal, and creating a wellness routine that helps you feel like your highest self.timestamps00:00 back in new york01:45 why august feels different02:54 my blank slate theory06:56 knowing when it's time to pivot07:26 finding what lights you up11:42 the energy you create from15:54 how i'd reset my life16:11 protecting your energy20:32 digital detox23:23 letting go of the past25:54 getting outside more29:13 breaking old patterns33:29 choosing one big goal36:05 my wellness routine39:18 final thoughts

Hello, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of LIS. I'm really excited to be back in New York. For those of you who follow me on Instagram, you know that I basically quantum leaped overnight, booked a flight back to New York after living between London and Bali for the last two years. I never thought I was going to come back to the city. I was just like so against the idea of it. And yeah, as of a couple of weeks ago, I woke up literally at three in the morning in Bali. with a download that I needed to get my ass back to New York. And I booked a flight and got on the next flight the next morning. And now I'm here. So it's been a little bit chaotic and a little bit crazy. But I'm also really happy to be back. I'm happy to see my family. And I'm happy to finally be settled in. I just moved into a new place. So those are my life updates. All very exciting things, but also it feels a little unpredictable. The energy in the air right now. I feel like everyone is kind of like upheaving their life and like starting new chapters or starting a new career path or quitting their jobs and like going kind of feral. Like I'm getting the energy from a lot of people

recently that we're just all sick of our old selves and we're making these massive life changes. And even my mom, my mom is the most predictable person ever. Not in a bad way. I love her to death, but she's very traditional and said in her ways. And even she was like, I don't want to work anymore. And I'm like, all right, go, live your best life. So when I see my mom wanting to change and break out and do something that's more freeing for her soul, I know there's a massive collective energy in the air right now. Like something is going on. So I'm excited to see what the future holds. And it basically inspired today's episode.

Today's episode is going to be talking about why August is the perfect time to start your entire life over like a newborn baby. Fresh start, blank slate. You're coming into this world with no recollection of the person you were a week ago, six months ago, or five years ago, okay? I feel like now more than ever is a time to reinvent yourself. After just speaking to so many people, my friends, my family, and just the people around me in the social media space, I've realized that everyone is looking to reinvent themselves and rebrand themselves right now. A guy stopped me on the street in New York yesterday and he was doing an interview and he was a musician and he was even saying, I've done the same thing with my music and the way that I look physically for so many years.

Now I'm stepping to an error where I want to change my look. I want to change my physical appearance. I want to change my branding. And I want to take bigger risks in my life. So on today's episode, we're going to be talking about why now is the perfect time to do this. Why now is the perfect time to completely reinvent yourself, rebrand yourself. If you're looking for a fresh start and a change, I'm glad you found this video. This episode is for you.

I was walking with my mom. I don't know why I've been getting all these weird intuitive downloads lately, but it's really interesting because I wrote this down in my notes, the blank slate theory. The blank slate theory means that you are starting from scratch. You come into this world knowing nothing. You come as a blank slate. When we're a kid, we feel like the world is made up of endless possibilities.

We have this process of figuring out what we want to be when we grow up. And our parents ask us, what do you want to be when you grow up? What do you want to do with your life? As we get older, that pressure and that thought increases. These things come up where they may pull us off of our actual path because we start to follow what school tells us to do. We start to follow what other people tell us we should be doing. And we may fall into careers or things that we think are our purpose, but they're not actually

our purpose. Even with me, like, as much freedom as I've had with being in like a creative industry and a creative line of work, I feel like sometimes I feel like I have to perform or post certain topics or say certain things just because it's trending or just because someone told me that that's what I should be talking about or because that's what seems relatable, right? But at the end of the day, if there was no one around, if you had no one to listen to, no one to take advice from, and it was just you as a blank slate, a fresh start, blank page, who would you be and what would your purpose be? And what would really put you in the highest version of yourself? What would

put you on the highest timeline, what would make you the most fulfilled, and what would put you into alignment? This is something that I've really been reflecting on because as much as I love the podcast and as much as I love creating content for you guys and I love Instagram, I love TikTok, I love all that stuff. There's still a piece of me that always felt like I wasn't fulfilling my actual purpose. There was always a piece of my soul that just felt like, am I doing this for the right reasons or am I doing this for the attention, for going viral, for, you know, being relatable, for being likable. I think it's hard to tell sometimes because when we get that like dopamine high of someone appreciating our work or liking our content or videos going viral,

we gain a lot of followers or whatever it is, it feels really good. So you're like, oh my God, this is what I'm supposed to be doing. But in reality, I feel like if we go a little deeper, it's really about getting to the core of what your soul wants to do. As I'm approaching, the fall as I'm approaching, you know, this new chapter of my life where I just moved back to New York, I'm starting to really question everything. And I'm like, if I was living as a blank slate with no one around, what would I be doing right now? And it's kind of a scary thing to face sometimes because you're like, am I just going to blow up my whole life and like change careers and do something so different with my life right now and like take a risk and just kind of start over like a newborn baby? And I'm like, yeah, life is fucking short. And now would be the time to do it. So I'm thinking about. getting into music because I love to sing and I've been singing since I'm a kid and I love songwriting. So we'll see what happens with that. That's going to be one chapter I'm thinking about and contemplating. And the other chapter I'm thinking about is just writing more and putting my work out there,

like putting all of my thoughts onto paper, maybe coming out with a book and just some other ideas that I've been like writing down and kind of getting clear on what actually lights me up, what actually excites me and what actually truly fulfills my soul. I think the podcast for a while did that, but I created the podcast out of a trauma response from my breakup. As you guys know, if you've been here since the beginning, my podcast used to be called Date Yourself Instead. Date Yourself instead was such an amazing chapter, an amazing era of my life because I was able to reclaim my independence from a breakup while helping millions of people heal from their breakups. And it was so rewarding and so special. But at the same time, I'm not sure if that was the end all for me.

Like I'm not sure if this podcast is the end all be all for my career and what I actually want to do long term, if that makes sense. So that's my little speech on, you know, why I decided to create this episode. But more importantly, I want to get into why if you are considering a rebrand, if you're considering a peaving your life like I am and doing something totally different with your career, why it's a good thing and why it's necessary to start now and not push it off for another year or two. The main thing being life is short. If you're in a position where you can pivot, it's an amazing idea. But also there's so many other reasons why I think now more than ever is the time to do it. So let's really get into it. The number one thing that I want to talk about first that I've learned from not being fully aligned

or in alignment with what you want to do is that the consistency never lasts and the burnout happens a lot more frequently. I think why I've constantly reinvented myself over the last. 20 years of my life, basically, and I kept pivoting with my career. It's not to say all of those chapters weren't necessary because they 100% were and they shaped who I am today. But I think the reason I kept pivoting so much and the reason I kept getting bored and wasn't consistent with what I was doing is because there was always something slightly missing. A lot of what we do is we will create an identity based around what we think we're supposed to do, what our parents tell us,

to do or even now what social media encourages us to do. Perfect example is now more than ever, people are trying to be a content creator, influencer, whatever you want to call it. And they're doing it just because they're seeing other people doing it and not because it's actually what's fueling them. And then people message me and they're like, how do you stay consistent? How do you post every day? How do you keep up with your content? And how do you go viral? You get the point. I get so many questions like this all the time. And my answer is, well, you first have to ask yourself, does this light a fire inside of you? Like what you're doing right now is it lighting a fire inside of you

where you wake up and you're so excited to post five videos about whatever you want to talk about? Or are you forcing it because you think it's what you're supposed to be doing because someone online is telling you it's a better way of life. Although being a creator is incredible and I think it's one of the best jobs you can have, it's not as easy as everyone makes it out to be. It is a job in the sense of consistency

showing up every day and actually loving what you are talking about and what you were putting out. The reason I would stop posting a lot of the times is because I was creating content out of, I don't want to say performance, but it was almost like I knew what was going to do well. So I would roll with that. And it did get me to where I needed to be at certain points in my life, but I would always stop. And the reason I always stopped is because it wasn't lighting that fire inside of me. And I think as I've gotten older, my whole mentality around person,

and meaning in my life has drastically shifted. And the biggest thing that I've taken from taking time off of the podcast, really recentering my energy, being by the ocean, listening to my intuition, really trusting my gut is that it is so much more rewarding to be pursuing something, even if it's scarier, that fuels you, that makes you excited to wake up, that makes you not want to go to sleep because you're so excited about it, that type of high. It is so much more rewarding to feel that way than to be posting content, even if you're going viral, even if it's successful, and feeling that weird sense of, yeah, this is doing well, but I'm not really passionate about it. Feeling that fire is the only thing that actually keeps me going for the long term. So even if it's riskier in the short term,

I think you need to find something that gives you that fire, that gives you that spark and go with it, because that energy is going to get you so much further long term than the short term of a video popping off on TikTok or whatever, or like, whatever it is that you're doing. If you're doing something because you think you should be doing it versus what is setting your soul on fire, that is something you should really think about, moving into the second half of this year. And I know for me, it's been such a wrestle because the podcast was so successful. We had so many people listening at a point.

And there's still a lot of people listening, but it doesn't give me that fire anymore. I've been reflecting on like either something has to change within the dynamic of the podcast, whether I'm, you know, bringing on guests and making the conversations more interesting for myself so I get that fireback or I just do something completely different altogether. So I'll keep you boasted on that. You guys will definitely know what I decide to do or maybe I'll do both. But the whole point is the reason why it is so necessary to pivot if you're having that itch and that urge is because long term it will pay off. If you are following that fire, it will pay off more than you trying to force something that you shouldn't be doing. The next thing is I was speaking to a manifestation coach about this and it literally just clicked and resonated so deeply with me and I knew I needed to share it with you guys. When you vibrate, because we have a vibrational scale, if you're vibrating at anxiety, worry, stress about your current job or your current life, you're just going to keep pulling in experiences and attracting more of that vibration or things and experiences or people that are. are vibrating at that same frequency. And anxiety, fear, worry, stress, doubt, depression,

anxiety, those are all low vibe emotions on the vibrational scale. When we're looking at it from a vibrational standpoint, if you are constantly vibrating at stress and doubt about your purpose, you're just going to keep creating more of that in your life and it'll keep you stuck where you're currently at. Whereas if you feel a sense of freedom doing something, joy, excited to wake up, it's an Evidable that eventually you're going to quantum leap and expand and scale exponentially into the timeline where you're super successful at it and you're making significant progress in very quickly. A perfect example would be when I started my podcast because I was actually excited about it and I felt a lot of freedom around it. I felt that spark, that fire in the beginning phase of it. That's why it grew so fast.

That's why it took off and blew up as fast as it did. And I know that because that fire was inside of me and it was fueling the energy behind the podcast. I woke up every day knowing that it was going to be successful. But when that burns out and you don't feel that way about something, you'll see how the energy shifts and it'll start going stagnant and flat. And that's because you're vibrating now at a different frequency about it. So when she was explaining this to me, this coach that I was working with, it all clicked in my head and made sense. I was like, so basically what you're saying is if this isn't lighting me up, anymore. I need to pivot and do something completely different with my life to get that feeling of

joy and creativity back. And she was like, yes, because the only way you're going to be able to grow and scale your business in whichever way you want to scale it is to feel that feeling of freedom and joy and excitement again. If you're working and pushing from a place of doubt, struggle, or like feeling like you're not making progress all the time and you're feeling discouraged, it's going to remain at the same flat level. And it's true because every. since I started losing my drive for the podcast, it hasn't really gone anywhere, right? So it's kind of like something needs to change. And if you don't change, nothing's going to change. So for me, I think my biggest priority over the last six months, traveling, re-centering myself, has been finding the things that

bring me the most joy and trusting that the right ideas are going to come to me. My creative spark is going to come back. And to be fair, it really has. I think I have felt so different. And I've seen major shifts over the last few weeks in particular that have made me more than ever believe in the power of feeling good in order to manifest, feeling like the highest vibe version of yourself in order to get what you want in order to see progress in your reality. It has made me just realize the importance of tapping into that feeling of excitement first and then figuring out what you're going to do about it later. So instead of trying to force like a new career, for example, Instead of having to know all the answers, like I'm doing this, this and this, I'm working on making myself just feel as good as possible.

And I know the answers are going to naturally come to me. So instead of fixating on, oh my God, if I don't figure out my life plan tomorrow, I'm a failure, which I could get in that headspace sometimes. Now I'm like, okay, I'm going to go to the gym. I'm going to eat healthy. I'm going to take care of myself. I'm going to meditate. I'm going to do the things I need to do that make me feel good. and I trust that I will know what to do next after that.

And it's really been working. I cannot recommend this strategy enough, making sure you're feeling amazing before you make life decisions. Because then when you feel amazing, you're making decisions from a very high vibe state and then you'll know you're on the right path and you're not making a decision based off of fear or worry or stress which can actually lead you down the wrong path.

Now we're going to get into the phases of how you're going to execute your new life. and have a total reset, by the end of this episode, you're going to feel so inspired and so charged up and so fired up to completely reinvent yourself and quantum jump into your brand new life. The first thing that you need to do is audit every old piece of yourself that you know is not going to fit into your new timeline. Who isn't coming with you into the next chapter of your life? You've got to get super serious about this and start cutting out people that are dragging you down. And I've mentioned this on so many episodes and you guys know I'm a big believer.

in the laws of detachment and like cord cutting and all that stuff. But I cannot emphasize enough the importance of limiting your circle, your friends, anyone in your life, people who you work with and your family, like anyone that's close to you, making sure you have firm energetic boundaries in place, number one. And two, you're really limiting who has access to your energy as you are stepping into this new version of yourself. And the reason being is that when you are working on yourself and improving yourself every single day, people feel it. They sense that you are elevating in your consciousness, in your purpose. They sense

how you're improving on yourself, right? And they're going to want to get a piece of that energy. Even people that I love dearly and, you know, I'll always love them. There's some people in my life that they see when I'm doing well. They want to be around me to the point of I feel depleted. I feel exhausted because I'm giving so much wisdom away. I'm giving them advice for their career, for their projects they're working on for their future, I'm actually taking away from the things that I could be doing to build myself and to improve myself. And of course, like, I love giving advice and I love helping people. But at the same time, your energy is your most valuable currency. And I always say this time and time again, your energy is your most sacred currency. It's so easy to get wrapped up

in wanting to be there for everyone or people pleasing or wanting to help people out or doing people favors because you love them. And if you have an open heart, you have a big heart and you're a kind person. It's your nature to want to do these things. And that's something that I had to sit down with myself with and really assess how much time I'm giving away to other people. It doesn't matter if it's your mom, your dad, your brother, your sister, your best friend. Of course, you're going to love those people and they're always going to be a part of your life. But that doesn't mean you have to cater to everyone 24-7 all the time. If you are looking to upgrade your life and improve every piece of your life, the first piece of the puzzle is getting clear on how much energy you're scattering and

giving away out into the world. Once I narrow down how many people I'm messaging back on a daily basis, how many people I'm going out to dinners with or on the phone with, like once I got clear on how much time I could allocate to other people on a daily basis, it freed up so much space for me to really get clear on myself and what I need to do next. It allowed me to be more in my own energy. And the beauty about this is some people could phrase it and say, oh, you're selfish, like if you're always about yourself. But there's no way you could show up properly for other people if you're not filling your own cup first. I know that's kind of cheesy. And, you know, there's a lot of things that online that say things like that, like fill your own cup. But it is the most true thing in

the world. I think when you're constantly giving out pieces of yourself and you feel depleted, it's not really serving its purpose anyway in the right way. When I feel like the best version of myself, I can show up better. I want to help people more. I'm more energized. I'm more me. And I'm more loving and I'm more giving long term. So don't feel guilty for taking some time to really get focused on your energy and your priorities. When you figure all of that out eventually, you will be able to show up even better for the people in your life because you'll be able to feel accomplished and grounded in yourself and then share that with everyone else. You can't really share your success and your high vibe energy with people if you're always depleted. Makes no sense. So that's why I, that's why I prefer to be on

my own a lot of the time. Take time for myself, go for long walks, meditate, usually. I'm listening to like high vibe frequencies. If you search on Spotify healing frequencies, there's tons of playlist that will come up and I'll just listen to those morning, night, and get my energy in a state where I can really just be with myself. That's a really big thing going into this reset where you're shifting timelines and becoming the best version of you. The next thing I will say is also doing a digital detox and also cleaning out anything in your computer or your phone or your notes or your camera roll where you feel like if you're very nostalgic about, you know, a breakup or someone in your life, stop going through your text, stop going through old photos, stop reminiscing

about the conversations, about the breakup, stop talking about your past. You are getting laser focused on your future you. And would your future you be spiraling about a situation that happened six months ago? No. This is something I also had to wrestle with over the last two years. I haven't shared too much about it on the podcast, but I went through a situation where it was like I could not get over someone for the life of me. I didn't even date this person. That's the craziest part. I think sometimes those situations are harder.

It's like the what if. There was always a what if between me and this person. It took me two years to eradicate this person from my timeline. And the second I finally made that decision to slam the door shut, I swear to you, it was the biggest energetic quantum leap of my life. I realized that I had been living so wrong because I had been leaking my energy. towards a situation and a relationship that wasn't serving my highest self. The key is to think of your highest self and how that person would be operating and thinking

from that person, not thinking about the higher self as like a destination point, but you are literally embodying that person right now and you're operating as that person now. It starts today. So would the best version of you be reminiscing about someone that's not giving you what you deserve? No. Would you be reminiscing about a breakup that happened a year ago? No, would you be reminiscing about something stupid that happened a day ago that really has no effect on your long-term future?

No, you would be operating at the highest frequency version of you, which means you don't give a shit about the small things that really make no dent in your future or your future goals. You aren't hung up on the past because you know that the best version of you is laser focused on your mission to be in the future, work on your future. You are thinking in such a different way than you would be right now. And that's something I had to understand is like, would the best version of me care about the situation? The answer was always no. And it's easier said than done because obviously we're human. We have emotions.

We have feelings. And it's okay to be sad and go through those things. But there has to be a flip of a switch at some point where you wake up and you're like, I'm sick of my shit and I need to quantum leap into my new timeline. Like I literally need to become a different person because this isn't working for me. You'll notice that the more you make that decision to cut the cord and jump into that new version of you, everything else will fall into place. It's almost like you take rose-colored glasses off and you realize that I've been leaking my energy towards the dumbest shit. Another great

example wasn't even about me, but there was a guy that I met who for some reason had this like infatuation with wanting to be with me and I didn't really know him that well. And I was flattered, but at the same time, I literally was like, dude, you have rose-colored glasses on. We don't know each other that well. Like, I promise you, it's never going to be romantic. And I'm not saying that in any harsh way. I'm just saying it how it is. I don't feel this way. So I want you to live your best life. I want you to get married. I was literally like, I want you to be happy. I want you to move on. I want you to like slam the door so you can move on and meet your person because I genuinely want the best for you. And the best for you would be to be with someone else because I wouldn't be

able to give him what he, I think, expected of me at the time. And I could see his energy shift before my eyes. I gave him the closure. And I think that's also important sometimes when we get that closure. That can also propel us forward. It's a little bit harder when we don't get closure. So I was so clear with him and cut through it about it because I wanted him to be long term happy. And I was like, you deserve to meet someone that is going to check all of your boxes and give you the love you deserve. And I saw his energy literally change before my eyes. He actually said to me, he was like, you think I'm wearing rose color glasses about you? And I'm like, yes, I 100% do.

And the reason I know that is because I've also had that experience where I put someone on a pedestal thinking that my whole world and my life and my energy should be catering to them when in reality it was doing my higher self the biggest disservice because I was leaking my self-esteem, my confidence, my ambition, all for the sake of someone who wasn't reciprocating the love I was giving out. The whole point is don't be afraid to close the doors, get the closure you need, and then cut the cords, and don't be afraid to jump into the next chapter. Dive head first into the next chapter, because I promise you, if you are brave enough to actually make that leap and fast and make that decision fast, and overnight, you're like, I'm done,

I'm ready to move on and be the best version of myself. I can guarantee you, things will shift so fast for you. You're going to start manifesting better. You're going to start receiving new opportunities. The second I closed that door, I got like five work opportunities. I got an email saying, list, get your ass back to New York. That's part of the reason I'm here right now. Just so much stuff happened that made me realize that sometimes as hard as it is because we're in our fields, the best thing you could do is be brave enough to walk away, cut the cord, shut the door on your old self and be a savage about it and be like, I'm done with

this shit. It's time for a new life. It's time for a new chapter and a fresh start. The next thing is something I took away from a recent interaction I had with someone that I just met here in New York. It was like a week ago. And I loved something he said and it stuck with me. He was like, nothing happens if you're staying inside all day. Like, you got to go outside and be seen.

Like, you got to do shit. And I loved that. It was weird because I was walking down the street after he had said that. And there was like a, they have these graffiti things on the sidewalks in New York that have different mantras and phrases. And I saw we outside. And I was like, this is so. funny because this guy had just said it. This concept of putting yourself out there, I think this is something that I'm learning. You can't really make power moves if you're sheltering yourself and you're

always like inside your house hiding. I'm an introverted person by nature and I've had to recondition my brain to be more extroverted. Like go out more, be more social, connect with people. Get involved in your environment and open up your aura to attract new experiences if that makes sense. I had this thing where I was like, oh, because I'm good at manifesting, everything's just going to come to me if I sit on my couch and like cozy up and watch friends, which by the way is like my favorite thing to do ever and I still do that. But I've been making more of a conscious effort recently to put my energy out there and say yes to more things and more opportunities and not cage myself in energetically. It's been so rewarding because I feel like I'm meeting new people. I'm expanding my network. I'm also feeling naturally just more confident in myself because I've been using my personality more, if that makes sense.

Like I'm just speaking more. I'm using my voice. I'm meeting different types of people that I normally wouldn't have conversations with. I'm going to events that I usually would have passed on. I've been doing social media since I'm 19. So there was a point in my life where I was like, I'm not going to any more events. I'm not doing any more of these like influencer parties and all this shit. And that's fine to take breaks from the social world.

But at the same time, life is short and you never know who you're going to meet, what opportunities you're going to land, what connections you're going to form by putting yourself out there and shining and using your voice and like doing things. So sometimes stepping out of your comfort zone and embracing new experiences and putting yourself out into the world more can lead to really amazing, abundant opportunities. And that's something that I've learned recently that I wrote down because this will help you, even if it doesn't seem that way now, all it takes is one dinner, one event, one coffee meeting you have with someone to change the entire course of your life. It's one opportunity. It's one day that can change the course of your life or give you something valuable, knowledge-wise, that can change your course of direction.

So just something to open your mind up to because I think for the longest time I was like, no, I don't need to go out. I don't need to meet anyone. I'm good in my space. And that's okay at times to preserve your energy and chill. But I think having a balance of putting yourself out there as well is a really, really positive thing. If you've been following me forever, you know, like I'm like, I like to stay home and hide. But it's a new era of lists. And I hope this could be a new era, inspire you to put yourself.

out there as well. The next thing is I've been literally intentionally thinking about my patterns and my cycles and my old habits and things that I do and changing every single fucking detail of what I'm doing. And I'm going to explain this in more detail. So this is a really funny example, but it's very easy to understand. I had a pattern of dating English guys and it got me nowhere. I'm just going to say it. I'm done with the British guys. I don't care. I love my British girls. girlfriends and they're my best friends and I love them to death. But I'm done. You guys know I had like a whole dating era in London. I'm, I'm just fucking done with it. And the reason I'm done with it is because it was going in a loop with the same patterns, just different guy. Same type of dynamic,

different guy. I was leaving every interaction feeling so emotionally unfulfilled. Like the British culture is just so different from American culture. And some people love it. And I do love parts of it. And I love London and it'll always be one of my favorite cities for sure. But in particular for what I'm looking for because I know myself better now and I've matured and I've grown up, I know exactly what I'm looking for in a partner. And yet I kept doing the same thing. Like I was like, oh, I'm going to try dating another British guy, another British guy. It ended up in the same place every single time.

And so my mom literally had an intervention with me and was like, you keep going for the same exact person in a different body. Why don't you try something different? And I was like, I don't know. I don't know what to do. Who am I going to date? Because I'm in London. She's like, why don't you try leaving London and coming home? Like, why don't you try moving back to New York? We would like fight about it all the time. And I was like, no, I don't want to come back to New York. I don't want to come home. I was super stubborn in my ways, set in my ways, because by nature I'm a very stubborn person. And I'm

like, no, I'm going to do me. I'll meet someone. Long story short, this all happened in a few weeks, by the way. I had a situation happen in London where I was like, I'm fucking out. Bye. I'm done. And that was the quantum leap where I realized that something needed to change within me and my patterns and what I was doing because it wasn't working. And sometimes it's just a wake up call moment where someone does one thing and it snaps you into reality and you're just like, I'm fucking done. So I actually experienced something, which I'm very grateful for with someone that really snap me out of this like British thing. And I'm like, I'm going to try something different. Lo and behold, literally within five days of making that decision, I'm not. someone that was checking every single box and every single requirement that I ever wanted in a person.

And he's not British. So I was like, wow, it's because I was keeping my brain and my energy in this loop of doing the same thing over and over. It became habitual. And I wasn't getting the results I wanted yet. I kept going back to the same type of thing. The whole point of this story is that sometimes you need a break what feels good in the moment, feels familiar, feels comfortable, and try something different.

You got to start doing something different in order to see different results, in order to get a different experience out of your reality. So once I made that conscious choice and I was like, I'm fucking done, I met someone that was actually giving me the opportunity to see dating from a totally different lens and realizing that I was so blinded and so stubborn and set in this one way of thinking that I couldn't see that there was a brand new door open with such a better person. It was so eye-opening and I highly recommend if you're the type of person who's looking to see massive changes in your dating life or in any area of your life and you're not getting the results you want and you keep doing the same things. You keep repeating the same cycles or dating the same types of people. Try doing something different. It was the best piece of advice I ever took from my mom and you know how we don't listen to our parents. I'm so stubborn with that. I'm like, no, I'm not going to listen to my mom.

I'm not going to listen to my dad. And then they always end up being right and you're like, shit. I literally called my mom. I was like, I would never usually date this type of person, but I'm going to try it. First date was like, eh, but then the second date, I really got to know them. And I was like, wait, this is so funny because I was so against this concept of different, but different is so much better. So lesson learned, try something different, try something new, even if it feels like you don't

want to or you're not feeling the vibe in the beginning, give it a chance because I'm telling you, you're going to be way happier. The next thing that is going to get you to the next version of yourself, to the best version of yourself is laser focusing on one thing that lights you up. I need to be all in or nothing. Like, I'm very all in or nothing with what I'm doing next. And I think when you're all in with something, you can build the momentum behind it and be the best at it. And that's what I did with the podcast. That's what I did with my travel blogging career before the podcast.

and I was always mastering the art of one skill and one particular thing. It is so valuable to lock in on one goal and make it a big goal, like make it a significant goal and lock the fuck in. Just charge at it and know that this is the target point. I've mentioned this on other episodes, but I truly believe your brain needs a target in order to be really successful at something. It needs a target. If you don't have a target, you're going to be all over the place and you're going to be like,

one day you're doing this, then one day you're scrambled and doing something else. And if that's for you and you like changing things up on a daily basis, that's fine. That's great. But I know if you are the type of person like me that wants to be the best at something and work towards something, you have to know what you're working towards. Now is the time to figure it out. Tying it back to what I said earlier in this episode, the way you figure that out is by

feeling good. And getting in a high vibe state, the idea will naturally come to you. So for me, it was the podcast. And I locked in and I put all my energy towards it. and I learned about the industry. I learned how to podcast. I learned how to, you know, edit. I learned how to do everything I needed to do in order to make it the best it could be.

But now I'm in that phase again where I'm like, what's my next target? What's my next goal? It's very exciting because once you figure that out, it's like you know exactly where you're going and you know exactly where you're headed and you feel like you wake up every day with a mission because you have that target. So my biggest piece of advice to you, if you're currently going through a transition phase, is once you figure out that big idea that you want to scale, lock into just that and become the best at that. If you're like the best multitasker, maybe this information won't resonate with you as much. But for me, I know I'm all in or nothing.

And I think it's a good way to be because then you really can give yourself the room and the space to really excel in that one thing. If you're like a really good serious multitasker, I'm envious of you and I'm jealous of you because I wish I could do a million things at once and be the best at everything. But I think it's more productive when you lock in on one thing. And the last thing I'm going to leave you guys with, I saved this for last really because I've said it a million times. It is the blueprint to being successful is having a solid routine in place for yourself that pertains to your health and your wellness. Health is everything to me. I'm so passionate about wellness and experimenting with different supplements and, you know, workouts and things that make me feel good.

Because when you feel healthy and vibrant, that's when you're going to perform your best. So for me, recently it's been running a lot. And I actually fucking hate running. But the feeling I have after, the dopamine high I get after, the clarity mentally I get after, the way it affects my sleep, my mental health and my confidence makes it all. worth it. Everyone's joining a running club and posting their runs and whatever. You don't even have to do that. You just have to do something that works for you that moves your body, that moves stagnant energy, stuck energy through your body and makes you feel good. That's the key here. Feeling good, feeling

healthy, and feeling like the most confident version of yourself in your physical body. Running in particular gives me the most clarity and it brings my manifestations to me the fastest. Whenever I'm on a run and I'm thinking about my goals and what I need to get done and my future self, I am able to move towards what I want faster. It feels like I'm running towards my future. Sounds cheesy, but it really does feel that way. Whereas like, if I'm just doing Pilates, and this is, okay, not a lot of women are probably going to agree with this, but like, I actually get more anxious doing Pilates because I'm like

planking in one position and I start overthinking and spiraling during the class. I'm like, I hate this. I hate this. And that is something that I had to come to terms with. because I was convinced that Pilates for me was like the best thing ever. And listen, it's so good. It's so good for your core. I love it because it's helped me with my back, my posture, everything like that. It's great, all well and good. But I think as far as productivity and actually feeling my best mentally, running works for me. Now, Pilates might be your thing. Lifting weights every day might be your thing. Just going for walks might be your thing. It's whatever works for you because everybody is different. Everyone has their own preferences with this. But, finding that thing that works for you where you know you feel your absolute best. I tried to get on the Pilates bandwagon for so long. Listen, I'm always down for a class, but it wasn't doing it for me with my confidence and

like my mental health. Sometimes I would leave feeling so burned out and tired that I would just be like, I want to go home and go to bed. Like I don't even want to do anything for the rest of the day. I don't know if anyone can relate to that. Maybe, you know, it's not talked about because it's so overhyped. But Pilates was actually making me more tired and like I would just want to chill. Whereas running is like, let's fucking go.

I'm ready to take on the world. I'm ready to literally take on New York City. I've been running from my apartment all the way uptown and then back downtown. And I'm like, this is the best feeling in the world. So that's my preference. But the point is do something that makes you physically feel amazing and that will leak into your work. That will affect your work. that will push you to be the most productive, successful, high vibe version of you.

And with that being said, that concludes today's episode of Bliss. I will definitely most likely make a part two of this because I have a lot more to say. But the time's up and I am going to go get another coffee. So that's that. If you're currently going through a period of your life where you feel like you really are resetting the clock on your life, you're rebranding, you're stepping into a new era, leave a comment on Spotify and on YouTube as well. I would love to hear from you as well as send me a DM on Instagram Atlas, L-Y-S-S.

If you enjoyed this episode, also be sure to rate the podcast on Apple and Spotify. And be sure to send it to a friend or post it on your story if you enjoyed it. And you want to share it with the world. Thank you as always for being here and being a part of this community. I appreciate you. More than you know, you guys have been the best. And I'm excited to keep creating for you guys. In whatever way I decided to do it.

You'll see soon. I have a few plans in the works, including, by the way, before I go, Substack. If you guys haven't joined Substack yet, it's a writing platform. And I'm sharing a lot of my life updates, business plans, dating, advice, and everything in between on my substack. I'm going to link it in the show notes as well as in the YouTube description. I love you guys. Thanks again.

And stay tuned for future episodes.