Date Yourself Instead - YOUR THOUGHTS CREATE YOUR REALITY

Episode Date: September 11, 2023

SURPRISE to the video episode :) It's the 1 year anniversary of DATE YOURSELF INSTEAD baby!!! Wow. I can't believe just one year ago I started the podcast and it became what it is today. In this episode, I discuss my mental health journey, as well as this idea of your THOUGHTS creating your reality. Thinking positively about your life and yourself, and your future...is SO essential in order to live the life of your dreams. I hope you love this episode, and let me know if you want more videos. Xoxo.

Today is the one year anniversary. Well, it's not today actually, I'm recording this in advance, but when I post this episode, it will be the one year anniversary of date yourself instead. And I cannot believe it's been a year since I've released my first episode of the podcast. Honestly, I feel like this podcast was the most unexpected journey and blessing of my entire life. I never thought I would be doing it full-time. I never thought it would turn into anything. The way that it's blossomed and the way that it's grown is so incredible to me. And it's also given me so much meaning and purpose to my life every single day.

I wake up and I know that I have more meaning to my life because I'm helping other people and I'm helping other people around the world that have gone through similar situations to what I've been through and the fact that we're all connected and the fact that we could all relate on some level has given connected and the fact that we could all relate on some level has given my life an entirely new meaning. And I hope you guys feel the same way. I hope it's provided some sort of value in your life if you're currently listening to the podcast. And, you know, even one of the episodes have helped you at some point in your journey, whether you're healing from a breakup, you know, going through a divorce going through a divorce or losing an important person in your life, or whatever it is, whatever you're going through,

I hope this podcast has related to you on some capacity, in some capacity. And yeah, it's just been such an incredible ride, and I didn't mean to make such a long introduction to that, but I just really can't believe it's been a year. And I definitely feel like I need to celebrate. Maybe I'll go out and have myself a shot at a kilo or something. Honestly, I really can't drink anymore.

But maybe I'll order myself some gluten-free chocolate chip cookies, have a glass of oat milk, and watch a movie. That's going to be my way of celebrating my one-year podcast anniversary. Okay, so now diving into today's episode, I'm going to be covering a few different things. The first thing I'm going to be talking about is my struggles with mental health and how mental health has been a big part of my life growing up and how my mental health has affected my ability to act on my dreams and act on my goals and act in different ways of my life, where I felt like I was stuck, I was stagnant, I was procrastinating a lot because of these blocks

I would have due to my mental health. And I guess the first big thing I want to talk about is that. And then I also am going to get into why changing your inner thoughts and changing your inner conversation ultimately changes your entire life. And ultimately will be the biggest game changer in getting everything that you want out of life and also changing your actual reality. And you'll see things shift once you actually change your inner conversation and the things you're saying to yourself on a daily basis. And those two things are so significant to me and it kind of ties into the whole idea of, you know, learning how to love yourself and practicing self-love and practicing self-care because when you have a really healthy inner conversation and

inner dialogue with yourself every single day, you're going to see amazing results in your reality. You're going to see your life change for the absolute better. And for me, growing up, maybe in an environment that was slightly on the more pessimistic side, not saying anything bad about my family members, but I feel like we all have grown up in different environments, different backgrounds, different cultures, and we all have had different childhoods, right? But for me, growing up in an environment where it was a great childhood, but at the same time, I think I also felt trapped in a way by my environment, trapped by my circumstances,

because I think when you're raised with parents that were not that maybe adventurous. Even though they were doing the best they could, I don't think my parents were very adventurous. They didn't like to step outside of the box, step outside of their comfort zone in different ways. And for me, I think I needed that encouragement growing up because I often felt trapped.

I often felt like I couldn't do things. Things for me weren't possible, that I would never be successful if I acted on a certain goal. I had to reprogram my own brain by myself in order to get to the place that I'm in today. I had to do a lot of inner work and healing in order to rewire my brain and restructure my brain to think positive thoughts and to actually believe that I could do it. There's a lot of people who grow up in really different environments where like their parents are saying, oh, you

could be anything, you could do anything, but for me, it was more like questioning where it was like, oh, are you sure that's a good idea? Are you sure that's what you want to do with your life? Do you think that's possible? And I had to convince my parents into believing that it was possible for me. And it's not their fault. It's just the way that they grew up, which was a totally different generation versus now where there are more opportunities. There are more things that you could do career-wise because we have cell phones now. We have apps like Instagram and TikTok where you could build a community and monetize it. So there are more opportunities compared to back then when maybe your parents didn't grow up in that generation or that

timeline so it didn't seem as possible. Does that make sense? So I'm gonna cover these two things with a podcast and really just talk about why it's so important to block out the noise, to now the people that are doubting you, to now what everyone else is saying and really focus on your own inter-diolog and your own inter-conversation and trust the process of your own life and your own path.

And understand that what's possible for you might seem impossible to everyone else. So you have to kind of say fuck what everyone else is saying, fuck what everyone else thinks. It doesn't matter what reality they're living in. This is my reality and this is the reality I'm creating for myself and I know it's possible for me It's not easy. It's easier said than done, but we're gonna get into it so Back to the whole topic of mental conversation mental health conversation I'm gonna pull out my notes because

You know It's because it's pretty important. So here we go. Okay, so let's talk about mental health for real. I've honestly had a ton of anxiety growing up. I can remember maybe the first instance I had anxiety and I was depressed was when I was 14 years old. And I was a freshman in high school. I was just figuring my life out for the first time in a new relationship. I had a boyfriend. I was doing a lot of extra curricular, extra curricular. I don't know why that's a tongue twister every time I say it. Extra curricular

activities. And I was trying to figure out what my passions were. I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life because there was so much unspoken underlying pressure even at 14 years old to figure everything out. I feel like school in general puts this unspoken pressure on people, not every school, but my school at least, where everyone's in competition with one another, everyone's trying to be the best and everyone's trying to figure out what they're going to do with their lives. So it could be stressful. You're fucking 14 years old. I'm 30 and I'm still figuring things out. I realize that life is just a constant process of figuring shit out.

It never ends. It never stops. So there's no point in stressing about it because it's supposed to feel fun. It's supposed to feel like an adventure. You're supposed to explore and try new things all the time because that's the beauty of life and that's the beauty of living, right? We shouldn't be trapped into one idea or version of ourselves.

It's okay to have different interests. It's okay to not have everything figured out. When I was 14, I didn't know that. So I developed this, you know, anxiety. And I developed a lot of mental health issues that I think came earlier than that. But I just didn't really know what it was until I was in high school. I started going through depressive episodes

where I would be really excited in a current moment about something and then it would crash and I would feel super depressed, unmotivated. I wouldn't feel driven anymore and I would feel debilitated. And then the next day I would have a good day and then maybe at night I would crash and I would feel like the world was ending and I had no meaning and no purpose to my life. And it was like these intense highs and lows where at the time, because I was so young, I didn't realize that I was experiencing mental health issues. I just thought that was my personality.

Like I thought that was just like normal and that was who I was. And I labeled myself as a moody person and so did my family. Like my mom would always say, you're super moody, you're super moody. And that was all I heard. So I programmed my brain even further to think, oh, I'm a moody person. I have mood swings all the time.

And I just like normalize that in my head as like that's just who I am. And it was really hard because I would constantly question if something was wrong with me. And I never went to the doctor, I never got like diagnosed for anything. And I was honestly afraid too. As I got older and people started talking

more about depression and anxiety on social media and it became a more spoken about thing publicly as time went on as I entered my 20s and social media started becoming popular. I was scared to kind of face it. I was scared to get diagnosed or like go to the doctor and have them tell me something like, oh, like, there's something wrong with you. So I kind of always just put it on the back burner and I learned how to cope with it and deal with it. But so when I was 27 at the end of 27 into 28 and 29, I went through probably the three hardest years of my entire life and my mental health was at like a breaking point where I was like, I cannot live like this anymore and I actually need guidance and I need help. So that's when I

entered therapy. That's when I started doing shadow work in our work. I started committing myself to a daily routine where I would actually need to work out for my own stability and peace. Like, it was a complete mental health thing where I didn't care about, you know, obviously working out for looking a certain way is fine. But for me, I worked out because I needed it for my brain and I needed it for the actual feeling that came with it, like feeling good and feeling more grounded in my body because I was just out of balance, out of alignment and it was one of those chapters of my life

that felt like it would never end. Like I was so depressed and I felt like it was getting worse and worse and worse. And the reason I wanted to talk about this today on the podcast was because I know how many people struggle with mental health. And now that I'm kind of out of it and I've kind of went went through, I think the worst of it. Hopefully. Now, I really do think that was just those years were a test in a way to prep me for what's to come, which is so many miraculous things happened after that and blessings. And I'm sitting here talking about it now and like, just the podcast, I don't think any of this,

I don't think date yourself instead and the podcast would have even blossomed or come to fruition if I hadn't gone through all of that. But I wanted to talk about this because I just feel like it could definitely help people and resonate on some level. If you're currently going through this era of your life where you're like, things feel like they're not getting better, things feel like they're not changing.

I'm stuck, I'm stagnant. I feel like I'm never going to get to the other side of what I want. Like I want this dream life. I want all these goals and dreams. They're in my head, but it just doesn't feel accessible. That is okay. That is okay because it's human to go through highs and lows and experience things like this.

And I wanna emphasize that, everything that you're going through now is prepping you for blessings and for a stronger and more empowered version of you. And it might not feel that way right now because it's so difficult to push through, but I promise you that everything that you're going through is prepping you for a more empowered, stronger, more incredible version of you than you could ever dream of or imagine of. And like, for me, if someone were to tell me that when I was going through all that bullshit at that time, I would be like, shut the fuck up. But honestly, it's so true. Like, I am so grateful for everything that I experienced between going through the hardest break up I ever went through in my

life, from my mom getting sick and being diagnosed with a really serious cancer to losing almost everything I had financially. Yeah, all of those things happened all at the same time pretty much to me in my life, like in a domino effect, like I was fucking broke essentially, and I thought I wasn't gonna have a mom anymore, and I lost the love of my life. So if you can imagine imagine on top of already having mental health issues,

like I already just had anxiety and depression to begin with, but then to face all of those things back to back, it was a fucking hurricane. I don't even know the right words to describe it. It was like a tornado just like coming into my life, sweeping everything out and transforming me. And it was so difficult to navigate at the time. But now looking back, I'm like, I'm a fucking warrior. I got through that shit. I got through that shit. I did that and I'm ready to help other people get through it. And I'm ready to make it my mission to help people heal and grow and become the best fucking version of versions

of themselves because I made it out to the other side and like I want to help other people do the same. Like it gave me a purpose. It gave me that courage to be able to create the podcast, to talk about my stories, to talk about the lessons I've learned, the heart breaks I've gone through. And it's just awesome. Like now I could say, everything happens for a reason, but in that current mental state

I remember just like going back in time, I remember I was like, why the fuck is this happening to me? Like what did I do wrong in my life to deserve so much shit? Cause like up until that point, I always labeled myself or thought of myself as a really decent person. Like my intentions were always in a good place with people. I'm a good person. Like I don't think I've done anything too fucked up in my life.

So I'm like, why me? Like is this my karma from a past life? Like I would just feel like such a victim, and that's normal. Like I just felt like the world was out to get me in a way, but now I want to transition into how I started my healing process and also how changing your inner dialogue will change your entire life for the better and how these two things that I'm about to talk about combined ultimately changed my entire life and helped

me out of that really dark place. Basically, after I went through an insane amount of chaos, like I went through the worst three years of my life, essentially, I tried to talk therapy for a while, and then I was doing this other form of therapy called EFT, and I did that for maybe six months, maybe a little longer. But after I kind of prepped myself and did all of that work, where I was talking about my feelings with a therapist and bawling my fucking eyes out every day, I knew I needed to go deeper. Like I knew I needed to do something more intense,

to transform my brain and to clear out a lot of childhood trauma and to clear out a lot of things that I had stored in my body for so long. I don't want to blame this on being a Capricorn, but I feel like it's just a Capricorn thing. Like, everyone knows Capricorns come off as cold and emotionless on the surface maybe, and we're very cutthroat and very like confident in our ability to say what we need to say, give the right advice and bounce. But I am very emotional with certain people, and I'm very emotional in certain situations. But on the surface, I'm not emotional because I bottle everything in.

Like I store that shit in and I store it and I keep it inside and it's just something that I've always done. To protect myself, I don't show emotion, right? That was my thing. I'm not gonna show emotion to a guy that I like because he's gonna think I'm weak. I'm not gonna show emotion to this person that I'm trying to work with in business

because they're gonna see me as a little bitch and I'm not gonna get the job. Or whatever it is, like I would always label being emotional with being weak. And it's something else I grew up with, just like not showing emotions, not being able to freely cry without feeling stupid or without feeling like I'm doing something wrong.

So I knew for me after I did like regular talk therapy and EFT and all this stuff like I needed to go deeper, but I didn't know how or like what I was going to do. And I ended up spontaneously booking a trip to Tulum and I mentioned this and I go into detail on my I did mushrooms in Mexico episode. So after this episode, if you haven't listened to that, highly recommend going to that episode and watching this if you're fascinated by what I'm about to tell you. I went to Mexico, met this woman who's a professional with mushrooms like like psilocybin. And she helps people out of traumatic situations

through the power of like guiding them through a psilocybin experience. And this isn't legal in a lot of places, it's legal in some places, I think it will be legal everywhere eventually. But it's basically this spiritual experience, okay? You're not going to a party and going to a rave with a random group of people and doing mushrooms.

It's not like that at all, and I would never tell anyone to do something like that or recommend that because I've never touched a drug in my life,. I'm not even kidding. I love being in full control of my body, of my thoughts and emotions. I don't like feeling that loss of control aspect. So it's always steered me away from experimenting with drugs or even alcohol. I'm not a big drinker because of the same reason. But I was recommended to this woman from a friend that I met

in Tulum and then it just happened naturally. I wasn't planning this, I didn't know this was gonna happen. It was like the universe fucking guiding me there. And I set up a meeting with her and it was all like super professional. She evaluated me. She was asking me why I would want to do an experience like this, what I would benefit,

like how I would benefit from it. She was asking me about my past, my trauma, my situations, learning about me to see if I was a right candidate for it, which is super important because you shouldn't be doing something like this unless you actually need it. It's like a very powerful medicine and you shouldn't be doing anything like this unless you absolutely need it. So she decided or she told me that I needed it. She was like, yeah, you're you're a good candidate for it. I was like, great. I'm terrified, but I'm going

to do this because I'm desperate to feel better. Like I need to feel better. I've tried everything I possibly could try and nothing is fully clicking with me. And I feel like this was meant to be. Like it was the universe lining me up with you, to be able to meet you, to be introduced to you, it's fate. So I do this experience, which you could learn more about on my other episode. I told you about. I'm not going to get into all the details, but I will say it changed my fucking life, it changed the course of my life,

and it inspired me to create the date yourself instead of movement. While I was still in Mexico, that's when I started planning the whole podcast. When I got home, I recorded the first episode. It just sparked all these things and it changed the whole trajectory of my entire life to say the least. But after I did that and then I started the podcast and I started, you know, initiating, taking action with something that I was passionate about, but also knowing that I was sharing my story and helping other people, that's when my brain really started to shift.

It was when I started believing in myself again that I could reinvent myself and recreate myself and change my whole reality. And now we're going to dive into this whole concept of changing your inner dialogue and how it can change your fucking life. how it can change your fucking life. Prior to that whole Taloom experience, the inner dialogue I was having on a daily basis with myself was so toxic. It was so self-destructive. And I'm sure at times we've all been there

where we talk badly about ourselves inside our own head. We're like, wow, I'm ugly or wow, I'm a shitty person or wow, I'm super insecure about this and I'm an insecure person. Like you almost label yourself internally with this dialogue that you create for yourself with the power of your own thinking. So I was constantly thinking of the worst about myself. I was like, I'm a failure. I'm never going anywhere with my life again.

My good days are over. My early 20s were the best years of my life. And it's all going downhill from here. Like, I have no purpose. I have no meaning anymore. Life sucks. I'm it's all going downhill from here. Like I have no purpose, I have no meaning anymore, life sucks, I'm broke, I'm a failure, I have nothing going for me. You get it, like anything negative that I could possibly think of was like going through my head as a pattern on a consistent basis. And like looking back, I'm like holy fucking shit.

Like that was so bad. That no wonder I couldn't get out of any sort of cycle. I convinced myself on a daily basis that I was worthless. Like, and when you do that, when you program your brain to constantly think things like that, you're only gonna see things like that show up for you program your brain to constantly think things like that, you're only going to see things like that show up for you in your reality. You're only going to reflect back to you what you're constantly thinking about yourself

and what you're constantly thinking about your life. And for me, it was all negative. So for three years straight, I realized I had conditioned my brain to think the absolute worst, and it reflected back to me in my reality on a daily basis. And a lot of that programming stemmed from my early childhood where I was taught to think certain things and think certain thoughts. And I had to constantly re-talk myself out of these things where I would be like, that's not true. You're the best, you're worthy, you're deserving, you're gonna go places in your life,

and you're the fucking shit. Like I had to rewire my brain, growing up, to get to a place where I had a million followers on Instagram, where I was making a million dollars a year at 23, 24 years old. I was crushing life because I had reprogram my brain, but I forgot how to do that when things weren't going the way that I had planned in life, I guess, you know, I had a lot of obstacles. In my late 20s, my brain started taking these experiences and shifting my internal dialogue. So I started, so I almost essentially forgot the importance of positive thinking and affirmations and self-love and self-worth. I forgot how to do those things. So things just kept feeling like they were getting worse and worse and worse because my inner dialogue was so twisted. It was like basically telling me that I was never going to be anything in my life ever again and that my good days had passed. And that's sad to even say out loud now like I'm like holy shit like I feel bad like for myself

three years ago why was I so dark but the truth is I think I had to also experience the darkness in order to be brought back to a place of light. I think everything happens for a reason. Everything teaches you things in life and I don't wish upon anyone or myself to ever go through a period like that ever again because, you know, obviously, again, because obviously I think life is beautiful and we deserve to wake up feeling happy and enlightened and excited every day. But I kind of lost myself along the way in my late 20s where I was like, life sucks and I gave myself that narrative all the time. It was only until 30. So recently, like I turned 30 in January, where I realized that your inner talk,

your inner talk is going to dictate your reality and the rest of your fucking life. How you speak to yourself on a daily basis. How you envision your future on a daily basis. How you wake up every morning and talk to yourself is going to dictate your day. Is going to dictate your future. And I didn't understand that concept until I was 30 because I naturally kind of knew how to do it in my early 20s. I was very confident in my vision for what I wanted. I wanted to travel the world. I wanted to be one of the biggest Instagram influencers at the time. I wanted to make a million dollars a year.

And I was so confident and sure of that. And I created that reality. I didn't listen to anyone else. I tuned out the noise, but I forgot how to do that as I got older. So when I turned 30, I made it my mission. I'm like, I'm going to reprogram my brain again to create a brand new future for myself. I'm going to get that huge podcast network deal. I'm going to be making millions of dollars.

I'm going to be traveling the world again. I'm going to be traveling the world again. I'm going to meet my soulmate and the love of my life, who's going to worship the ground that I walk on and I'm going to be obsessed with him and we're going to be in love. And I'm going to be the happiest I've ever fucking been in my entire life. Like I'm going to have all of those things.

But you can't have any of those things if you're thinking the worst. So you have to take steps to reprogram and rewire your brain and block out the noise of what anyone else has to say about you, of what anyone else is telling you. You have to be the creator of your own reality and learn how to block everything else out. So if you have a parent telling you, you can't do that. You're not capable of that. That's impossible.

You're delusional. If you have friends telling you that, block it out. Ignore it as much as you fucking can. Your inner voice and what you believe about yourself is going to dictate your future for you. All of that hater outside noise, let them talk shit, let them doubt you, let them worry about what they need to worry about,

focus on you and your goals and your needs, and what you think is capable for yourself, and truly embody that and believe it. Because that's how you're gonna get to the goal. That's how you're gonna have your dream life. That's how you're going to get to the goal. That's how you're going to have your dream life. That's how you're going to be happy. That's how you're going to find true happiness and peace. After I came to this realization that everything is your inner dialogue, everything in my life started to shift, okay. People were telling me that we're managing me at the time. They're not managing me anymore for a valid reason and I'll explain. They were like, oh, it's really hard to grow a podcast. It's really hard to have people actually want to listen to you speak.

It's really hard. It's difficult to be the number one podcast on Spotify. No, that's not happening. Like, that's impossible. Or it's just really fucking difficult. That was when I realized that I was like, fuck you, I'm gonna put this podcast out. I'm gonna do whatever it takes for people to listen to it because I know my purpose is to heal others

and I wanna change the world. I'm making it my mission to share my story so I could help at least one other person. And if I'm helping 100 people, a thousand people or half a million people, which I'm happy to say, I have, there's fucking half a million people subscribe to the podcast, which is nuts.

I have a mission and a goal and a purpose and nothing is going to get in my way and none of that bullshit of what you're saying about it is going to stop me. I also had other people telling me it's impossible to get a multi million dollar deal, like a network deal. And I'm like, watch me.

Watch me. I know my value. I know what I'm capable of. I know what I bring to the table. I know how valuable the content that I'm capable of, I know what I bring to the table, I know how valuable the content that I'm providing is, and I work my ass off every single day, and I'm not doing it for the money, okay? I, to be completely fucking transparent, I haven't made a single dollar off of the podcast.

I make money doing other things, but a lot of people assume that I'm making tons of money, millions of dollars already from the podcast because it's so big, and I'm like, hey, like, no, actually, I'm doing this because I'm so passionate about it, and I'm driven to do it every single day and I know how many lives I'm impacting and that's what gets me to wake up and go to the studio. It's not about the money, but I still want that. Like I still want to get to that goal because obviously I have to support myself and I live in New York City, the most expensive, the most expensive place in the fucking world, okay? Like an Uber here is like $100 round trip, not even kidding. But I'm here to impact, but I'm also here to live out my dreams.

There's nothing wrong with setting high financial goals for yourself. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be financially successful and wealthy. And that could look different for every single person. Some people might hear that and be like, holy shit, like, I think $10,000 is a lot of money. And great, that's amazing. Like, there's no judgment here. It's a judgment-free zone.

To me, I just have these goals in mind. And you could take it however you want it. You could be like, wow, like your psychopath and you're crazy. I don't like the way you talk about money. Great. I've been broke and I know that I never want to be in that position ever again. The only way to condition my brain out of that is to envision myself as a millionaire every single day. That's getting me through and that's pushing me through

and that's what drives me to wake up. And along with helping people and making a difference and making a genuine impact, I just don't see anything wrong with it. Like set the bar fucking high for yourself. You could have it too. You could have it too. You can have it too. In whichever way you decide to approach it, in whatever career you decide to be in. If you're passionate about something, if you're so fucking passionate about it, the way that I'm passionate about sitting here and talking to a microphone, go for that passion and put your all into it and don't fucking

stop until you get to the goal. It could take time, it could take a year, it could take five years, but I always go back to, there's different stories that I love, like just from, I remember like watching something about Jim Carrey. He is a YouTube video about, you know, his rise to the top as an actor and how he was poor and had nothing to his name, but he wrote himself a $10 million check. And after a certain period of time working, praying every day, believing in himself, tuning out the noise, and trusting the universe, trusting the higher power that he was going to be, you know, booking a $10

million movie. Guess what fucking happened eventually? He books the mask, which is like, obviously a super famous movie. I don't know if Gen Z even knows that movie, but very great movie. Okay, I grew up watching the mask. I grew up with Jim Carrey. He fucking did it. He manifested that shit because why? Because he blocked out the noise and he had this inner dialogue going day in and day out that I'm receiving $10 million. Obviously he had to put in the work with that. He wasn't just sitting on his ass. He was booking jobs. He was acting. He was doing whatever he needed to do to book and land that role. But when he did it, he did it because he convinced himself that it was possible.

And that's inspiring to me. Like waking up every day and knowing that you are capable of creating your own reality, that's fucking inspiring to me. And that's how I'm living my life now every single day. I wake up every day and I'm like, I'm in control. I'm powerful and I'm in control. I get to decide what goes here. I get to dictate what goes, what I say and what I feel

is ultimately up to me and I'm here to become unstoppable. I'm an unstoppable force. And I think that's the beauty of also stepping into like a real adult era of your life. Like I feel like now I'm becoming more grounded, I'm more sure of myself. Throughout your 20s, I feel like your 20s are just like you going through so many different experiences and figuring everything out about yourself and navigating all this type of shit. You have highs and lows and you go through crazy dating experiences and you're trying to figure everything out all the time.

In your 30s, I just feel like it's more grounding. I mean, this is my path and my journey, speaking for myself. I just feel more sure of everything, sure of my future, sure of who I am, sure of the direction I want to go in my life. So it all comes down to what's inside here, what's inside your brain, What's inside your head? You have to program your brain to think positively. Now, I have a course. I have a master class coming out on this. It might be out by the time I published this episode. It is called Dare to Detach. And the master class is really focused on becoming the greatest version of you by detaching from the thoughts that no longer serve your highest good, that no longer benefit you

to detach from the things that are holding you back from living your best fucking life. And yeah, you could definitely download that master class from my Instagram at date yourself instead. It's a good one. Something I've been working on for a while and it's something that's forever, just something that really changed the course of my life and I know it'll change your life as well.

So go check that out Instagram at date yourself that really changed the course of my life, and I know it'll change your life as well. So go check that out, Instagram, at date yourself instead. I'll link it. It'll probably be, you know, in my highlights, in my bio something. By the time I publish this episode, you'll have access to the course.

There's actually one more thing I want to talk about, about reprogramming and rewiring yourself to think more positively and step into a higher version of yourself and step into the future you actually want and deserve is learning how to properly meditate and making it a part of your daily routine. Now, when I was going through my toxic relationship, when I was going through situations, breakups, anything that was at the time, like emotionally stressing me out, I didn't meditate. Like I didn't even really think of it as a thing. I was just like, I don't know what to do.

Like let me go out with my friends or you know, I'll watch a YouTube video on how to get over a breakup, how to manifest my ex back, whatever the fuck it was at the time. And those things did help. Like those things were great and I, I think they were great, but I never had a routine in meditation where I was literally waking up and I knew okay, I need to meditate

for the first 10 minutes before I get out of bed. Or I need to go to sleep and before I put my head on the pillow, I'm doing a 15 minute meditation. Meditation is essential if you want to up level in your life and I'll tell you why because you are able to focus and re-center your thoughts and rewire your thoughts in the meditations. Like that is where I ground myself and where I'm able to collect my thoughts and check myself if they're not in alignment with the person that I want to be. If I'm thinking negatively in a moment, I know I can sit down and do a 10 minute meditation to clear that out. It helps you rewire everything.

And there's tons of meditations you could have access to on YouTube. I use YouTube a lot and Spotify, but I use YouTube specifically for higher self-meditations, jumping into a more powerful version of me. You can search, like, whatever you're going through, you can search a meditation circling around that topic. So, I highly recommend getting into a routine of when you first wake up and when you go to bed meditating. Doing whatever you can to redirect your thoughts and check yourself. If you're having a bad day and you're thinking, oh, like, my life is over, just checking

yourself and getting your thoughts back on track to a really good place where you're like, okay, everything's going be fine, everything is working out in my favor, and I'm gonna be just fucking fine. It's a super important part of my self-growth journey and my self-love journey, and it's just essential. I think it's truly essential. So on that note, I also hope the podcasts are attributing to your self-love journey. And I hope, yeah, I hope this resonated. I hope

this was a goody, good one. Thank you again for supporting the podcast listening every week. It's been such an incredible year and I'm so grateful that I've been doing this for as long as I have already a year straight of episodes. I can't wait to obviously continue and build and grow with you guys. I love you. I hope you liked the video on today's episode, which is new for me being in the studio and recording. Yeah, I love you. I'm going to go finish my coffee that's cold now. Okay. I love you.

Thanks for listening. If you like the video, let me know. If you like this episode, let me know. Send me a DM on Instagram at lists or on the podcast account at date yourself instead. And be sure to rate the podcast on Spotify and Apple. It all makes a difference. It all helps. I love you. And stay tuned for next Monday. makes a difference. It all helps. I love you. And stay tuned for next Monday.