D&D is For Nerds - Barovia III #28 The Usefulness of An Amoral Man

Episode Date: August 17, 2024

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You're listening to the Sans Pants Network. Far from the beautiful beaches of blue sand of my homeland is a place called Barovia, the place we now find ourselves. While they may look very different, one thing is the same, the sensation of being surrounded. We cannot leave this place, this disgusting barony of one Strahd Von Zarovich, at least not until we usurp him and take the throne for ourselves. Careful though, Friesen carries a heavy price in these parts. Tapos, is it possible for you to turn into some sort of flying creature or

something to get down there so we can see what we're dealing with. Okay. She turns into a rat and then scurries down. Okay. After, I don't know, maybe half an hour, which in which time work is still underway. Ropes are being slowly lowered down and people are trying to adjust or figure out how long the ropes need to be to get someone down to the bottom. There is no constructing a ladder for this. You don't really know how, A, you don't really know how deep it is, and B, even, yeah,

constructing a ladder out of the materials available is just beyond the time you have. Yeah, fair, fair, fair, fair. So it is decided that secured ropes is the best thing to do. Yep. Not everyone is going to be going down. Only a portion can... Well, first off, the space is only wide enough to allow four ropes down at once. So you can really only go in groups of four maximum.

And then some people will be needed. Not only are people needed to keep the cathedral secured, but there is still much work to be done around the city. And then Bigfoot Pole is now that the danger here is largely settled, Bigfoot Pole is peeling people off from this to man the walls in anticipation of an attack. For sure. Oh, I'm going gonna use my magic pants. No, the magic breastplate to recover one spell slot

so I got something guys. Okay. Whoo. Okay, yeah. That's something. That's something for the fighter head. After about half an hour of work, a very drenched rat climbs its way back up the conveyor belt.

When it gets to the top, it first off, Gorrub and Lushen nearly ball themselves over. My lady! The second they see the rat coming up, they try to get down to help her up and several people are required to hold them back lest they fall. But yeah, the rat climbs its way back up, and when it gets back to the top, it reverts back into Tarpos. She is drenched in blood. And gore. Viscera, it's all over her. That bad. Is a pile of guts at bottom.

I'm guessing it is what the dragon was hoarding. Is like a room made of... cavern made of gore. No dirt walls, no stone. Blood and bodies make walls, roof, floor, everything. Piles, many piles like undulating hills. Getting around down there. Space big, Did not see all. Did you see the dragon? No. Okay. Did not see dragon. Space. She looks at you very seriously. Space big. Like goes, like the town. The whole size of Kuchiri. All Kuchiri. Yes. Difficult to navigate like as in you fall do you think once we get down there will fall into the visceral gut as rat could stay on top but people may be struggle okay well that's annoying is like moving through river right not up not swimming yes you but you're wading. Yeah, wading, yes.

Is visibility, light? Is dark down there, no light, no. Torches? Yeah. Could sense something in darkness. Something felt through corpses. Something like a sense could see through corpses. Okay.

So can the dragon- Think if not, where rat would have come for me. Yeah, okay. What if in the moment we sit down? It'll know where they are. Well, we can't assume that. Like spider with web, she says. Okay, well that is disheartening.

How to get rid of the corpses? So that it can't find its way to us. I mean, that's assuming we want to get the drop on it. I mean, it probably knows. I don't know. It's hard to say. The princess will be in her coffin. Yeah.

To find that. How far down was the was the descent is about maybe 15 minutes by rat maybe 10 by human okay, I do the quick math of that in terms of like feet or for certainly I

Could convert it to feet easier than us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, it's 6,000 feet. Okay. Alright, so quite, quite far. I might have done the math wrong there, but who cares? It's my universe, I'll do what I want. It's 6,000 feet, or 10 minutes.

That's how it works. Alright, so we have 10 minutes down there. We can go down one at a time, as in like in groups of four. We can start dropping down. I can make... How many people do we want to send in there? I mean, you said it's cavernous. We could try and send like waves and waves and waves of four people. That makes sense. How many people do we have dividing that by four? That's how many waves we can...

The burj master speaks up. The ropes that we have can only hold so many at once. So our options are to either, the more people on each rope, the riskier it becomes for breakage. Or we could send people down, I would not recommend this, but obviously we can send them down one every four,

every 10 minutes. Right. So what is the, I guess, how many on a rope can we have without it breaking? She looks at the rope, maybe gives it a little testing tug, and she says, and then she realizes what she's about to say. It's like a moment, she's about to say the sentence normally She gets to a specific word which I'll tell you in a sec And then right before that specific word she laughs at the irony and then she says the full sentence. I am no

engineer but I couldn't so I can only guess I am I'd like to combine Adam amethysts for Mental warding I'd like to combine some direst wolf hearts for psychic damage and some rubies for undead bane to make Little grenades to try and negate some of that sensing through the bodies if possible Sensing to like drop them into the corpses to send out a shockwave that will disrupt the dragons, being able to see where we are. You make it?

Nice. Whether or not it's powerful enough to... It'll do. What the range on it is, is unknowable. I've made six of them. Uh, okay. On the mention of the engineer, I know we... I just don't think I should be the one to go speak to them.

Pip. Yeah. Um, perhaps it is worth yourself, maybe and Cavendish going and speaking to our little halfling, um, engineer to see if they have any information of, uh, what is it to be faced? Okay. I can do that. Perrin's with them outside.

Oh, be careful of his hands. Yeah, I'll avoid them. I'll give you the mantle warden grenades, just in case you need to go down earlier. Pirin's with them outside. He's under, well, not lock and key, but he's being watched. Okay.

There's no lock and key to put him in here. He's just being watched right now. Although he probably is still unconscious. Cool. You wander outside, you step out of the cathedral into the snowy surrounds, into Kuchiri. As I've stated before, but it bears mentioning. And maybe now you're looking at this with a new eye with the information you've just learned.

The snow beneath you is red, stained with blood. Cool. And it has always been this way. You know this much that the snow here is perpetually red. There's no red and black with soot. Yeah, yeah, sure. There's no white here. Yeah, there's no white snow here. You step down and every, because the cathedral's on a slight,

not a slight, it's on a hill. You step down the hill and every step down, you imagine what space exists beneath you. And how far it must stretch underneath. And you get down to the bottom of the hill, cross the road and just across the road, away from most of the group is Pirin, the unconscious form of the engineer,

and just a couple of guards. They're all sitting like in the gutter almost. Sure. I'll walk over to him. Hello. Yeah, how are you? He is still incredibly pale. Can I check him for vampirism? Actually, while I'm here,

then I'll start like touching his neck and looking in his eyes. You check him, you see that he's still Purin. Yeah, the way vampirism works is that he needed he would have needed to have been drained dry Completely. Yeah, I'm just I'm just checking. You know just doing my due diligence. He's not gonna become vampire spawn or vampire Okay, you seem okay Doesn't laugh at that, but he gives you a very sour expression. The sourest expression he can muster with what little strength he has left. It could have been worse, Byrren. It could have been way worse. Death, he says.

Worse than that. I need to talk to the Engineer. Can we do smelling salts or anything? He starts patting himself down, produces smelling salts, cracks it underneath the Engineer's nose. The Engineer slowly sits up. He's been bound and gagged. His hands have been bound as best as possible.

The rope has been woven into the mechanisms of his hands to stop them from flipping around. Yeah, cool. Oh, he's got the gag in his mouth. We might need to take the gag out, unfortunately. Sure, says Perrin. Hector wants information from him. I'll open up the, take the gag out of his mouth. The gods are all standing nearby very carefully, very warily, as if they're prepared for, prepared to strike the second they hear anything that might be a spell or something. Can I help you? Yeah, maybe. We're looking at going into the pit.

We need to eliminate the dragon. That's the next step. You know this place well. You probably know what we're to face down there. You have a better idea than we do. Additionally, being an engineer, you probably know a better method for getting down there than we could conceive. I've been asked to come and get this information from you. Can I have my pipe? Oh Look at Pirran Pirran shrugs. I don't know where your pipe is. I'm sorry. It's in my pocket

He says he shifts around he's got a belt with many different pouches on it actually No, he would not currently it'd be in the snow next to him Okay, he gestures to the belt it's in the right pocket Can I pick up the belt and then cast because I again one of the spells I forget I have detect magic on it It detects is magical there's you detect the entire belt itself is magical and then you detect several other little magical auras sitting within them Mm-hmm. It's a myriad of different magical effects you spend, I assume, a few moments studying it. Absolutely, I wanna know what it's capable of. Are you looking at specifically? I'm looking at the pipe, that's what he wants.

The pipe, okay. You pull out the pipe, the pipe does not in any way detect as magical. Okay, great. Yeah, sure. Can you tap it in for me? He has tobacco in the same pocket. I thumb some tobacco into his pipe,

and I put it in his mouth and then I light it. Sure. He takes a few puffs from it and you can see he's considering. What do you need done? We need to get down there. The problem is currently that we only have four ropes and we don't know how many people or the weight those ropes can take. We can get maybe four people down every 10 minutes, but that's not enough, especially considering the dragon can apparently detect our presence. We'd be just sending people into the Thresher if we did it that way.

He looks over. There are still people taking bits of the machinery out of the cathedral. He looks at those people and says, I'll need five men and ten minutes. Let me talk to Hector. Stand up, I'll let him take a couple more puffs of the pipe, put the gag back in, and then I'll, hands behind my back, cracking my back, walk back inside. So I spoke to him. He wants ten minutes and five men. He says he can, well I assume he believes he can construct some manner of getting down there. Is Bigfoot Paul in earshot? Yeah.

Kind of thing? When Pip comes back in, Bigfoot, your little group reconvenes. Iona's there, Bigfoot Paul's there, John Cavendish is there. You can, or actually, no, you need to, a check must be made. Okay, you spot when Pip relays this information, you spot Iona and John Cavendish looking at each other and emotions are exchanged, but you would have needed to have been standing directly in to judge what exactly just happened. You saw that they had a non-verbal conversation just now.

I guess I looked to Bigfoot Paul and I guess potentially even Iona because they're this town. What do you want to have done with him? Bigfoot Paul thinks about it and right before he's about to say anything, Iona speaks up. I wish that there should be justice, I suppose. It is he who created the automatons, which have caused no end of chaos and death and misery, and not just the direct result of these automatons. It is in addition to this, just their creation caused misery.

The hag and the deal that she made with the princess caused even more misery. Caused Iris, Iona says. She begins working herself up into a bit of a lather. She's getting madder and madder and madder. She's starting to twitch. Cavendish, she's about to start yelling. She's literally about to start yelling and carrying on. You can see she started pacing backwards, little paces, but then it looks like it's getting further and further. John Cavendish does a big, and Iona stops, looks at him,

and then finally Bigfoot Paul interrupts. Perhaps, we have no facilities to jail someone and no facilities to put someone on trial. Our options, therefore, are thus a kangaroo court, as this man will find no fair trial in this city, which I have no real problem with. But perhaps his punishment should be more productive. Bigfoot Paul, very quickly, his eyes flick at Pip and then back to you, Hector. I, had you spoken to me a few days ago,

I would have said the kangaroo court. But now, perhaps, I would not say a creature can change its spots, but maybe its current pattern can be more useful. You said this man is destined to help you. I'm starting to get a little sick of destiny. At that, John Cavendish, with his weapon again, slams it into the ground like a, he concurs. Those are the options as I see it. I would accept either one.

As co-Burjah Master, you don't think that was the agreement. I don't remember that part. There'll be some- As co-Burjah Master, he continues, I would say that were he to help you in your objectives, both here in Barovia and beyond, I would consider that were he to help you in your objectives both here in Borovia and beyond I would consider that time served At the very least it gets him out of my hair. I am very torn because I would like to see that man

Yes, you're right put on trial, but here I don't think he's going to be given a anything considered fair, but what he did I do not think was I don't think he's going to be given a anything considered fair, but what he did I do not think was Fair at all and I am torn because I feel without you have any other engineers or anything like that in amongst the people here engineers no cuz people who Would be confident. Yes but confidence is not a skill

My issue here is that, uh... John Cavendish laughs at that. Yes, we can send, um, by putting him on trial or giving him a swift execution. Sure, it might be just. It might be a sense of justice. Look at Iona. But then we are just sending what wave after wave of our own men more to die. I hate this, but... For now, we need his assistance. Okay, I'll let him know.

Right, give him to five men. Ten minutes. Make sure he is on the constant guard. Sure. If he looks like he's doing anything, anything that will go against us. He will be incapacitated. I promise. I'll go let him know. I'll head back outside. Okay. Hey. Do you take his gag out? Does he ask me to? No, he sits there quietly. Then no. Hector will acquiesce to your request. Five men, ten minutes, constant supervision.

I say that looking up from him at Purin and the two gods. Purin shakes his head slowly and says, I'm terribly sorry but I don't think. Well not you, you're fucked. Oh thank God, oh my God, thank you. You should be in a hospital. I was afraid of ghosts. Should have been afraid of having all of my blood taken.

Yeah, cause there was a vampire in there, but the ghosts we weren't sure about. Yeah, well, I mean, yeah, but I know how to deal with a vampire. I don't know how to deal with ghosts. I say nothing. I say nothing at the man saying, I know how to deal a vampire

who has 10% of his blood left. I hold my tongue. That's gross. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. You had a good boy, Cod. Not dead yet. Fuck yeah. Oh, they're a good boy card. Not dead yet.

Fuck yeah. Oh, they're so good to get. Oh, I'm so sorry. You bitch. Oh, you bitch, Adam. You sat on your own weapon. Oh, that's fine. Oh, that's annoying too.

Yeah, fuck. Your weapon, the weapon of your choice is broken. Your being my choice. Your crossbow, as you turn around, you accidentally drop it. It hits the ground and you hear it. It rolls with disadvantage until it's fixed. That's gonna take so long to fix it.

Unless. I'm not getting the engineer to fix my crossbow, Adam. To fax. You're not getting him to fax your crossbow? You bitch. Shut up, you bitch. Oh, wow. What about fix? Do you want him to fix it at least?

No. He might struggle to fax it, that's fair. Anyway. Mmm. Fuck. How long does it take to fix, Adam? It will take a... over the course of... oh, I was about to say a short rest. A short rest means something different.

A day. No, rest means something different. No, it's an hour. Over the course of an hour it'll take to fix. Which is not practical for this upcoming fight. But afterwards maybe, depending on what happens. You know, depending on what happens with that army coming here or whatever. Yeah, fuck. You might need to start fixing that up now. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

How long would it take you to fix this crossbow? I say. I just dropped it. I'm very embarrassed. He's not taking the gag out. I take the gag out of his mouth. I could have it fixed in about a minute. Oh. Okay.

I'll allow that. Is he gonna put a trap in my crossbow? I'll need my hands. If I try and do a read on this guy based on his past behaviour and the way he's acting now, do I get the sense that this is an evil man or an amoral man? You would- Am I looking at a Ludmilla or am I looking at a Pirran? You would describe it as amoral, yeah.

He just doesn't care. looking at a Pirran. You would describe it as amoral, yeah. Okay. He, he, he's being, yeah, he just doesn't care. He doesn't- That's good. Life seems to have no meaning to this person, including his own. He seems very calm for someone who is definitely being treated like he's about to be executed. Yeah, yeah, sure. Well, in that case, Pip does not, Pip knows that

he's not necessarily given this engineer a reason to kill him for no reason. Pip has dealt with Pirin this whole time. Pip can deal with the engineer. You almost might trust the engineer more than Pirin. Pirin is obfuscating with his motives. The engineer doesn't seem to have motives. This doesn't mean Pip likes the engineer, but pips like oh, okay I know this kind of guy. Yeah, well. Yeah, I'd appreciate it if you could fix it up. I'll need my hands he says I look up at the guards they shrug there. You're in charge. Yeah, I get your weapons ready Anyway, I'll untie his arms and I'll hand the crossbow over to him. In the time it takes you to climb back up to the cathedral, he has fixed the weapon.

Okay, fantastic. Thank you, appreciate it. No worries. I slot it back into my holster. Can I be there? I don't want to take him near Hector. His pip gets it. He killed his horse.

So I would like to supervise the construction of whatever he's making with the five guys. Sorry, just really quickly actually. Something, no, no, no, no, no. Okay, it's good. No, it's a, well, it could be a good thing. It's not a bad thing. I'll take it.

Are you expecting a fight in the immediate future? I think so. I can improve it temporarily if you want. He says gesturing to the crossbow. What do you get out of it? He shrugs. What do you mean? Sure, improve it. Okay. He makes some modifications. It is arcane to you, unknowable, as in not magical, as in unknowable. Yeah, sure. Whatever he has done to it. It's not magical, it's mundane. He has made some sort of mechanical adjustment to the weapon. When you're holding it, when you pull the string back, it pulls back just as well, or

just as easily so. But you can immediately tell that the drawer is way heavier than it was before. The bolt is going to rip through things. Okay, awesome. We'll lead the way, and I'll superv you and we'll I'll just acquire five. Does it have is it five specific people? I just need working hands. All right, I'll grab five people from the crowd. And I assume you don't care about the machinery here. No, I don't think so. I'm going to construct a escalator of sorts. Okay.

You are not familiar with that one, obviously. But yeah, sure, an escalator. And remind me, what is the function of an escalator? It's like stairs that move. Okay, move where? He gestures at the... I'm assuming Hector, this is not really hard to see. I sort of assume we're on the bottom floor and they can look down from the catwalk at us. Oh, I didn't even think... Hector, I thought was on the bottom floor right now. Oh, right.

Even on the bottom floor, no matter where you are, you are aware of this happening. Oh, yeah. You can see it. Yeah, I imagine I was kind of near the entrance like where all the, maybe like where either like just stockpiling like weapons or something or whatever it is, getting things in order. Part of the organisation efforts, part of the fixing the door so that it stays open, that sort of stuff. Oh yeah, grabbing those little collars. Oh yeah, good idea. To make them shut off all magic. The anti-magic collars. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because that'd been maybe not priority number uno, but like definitely up there, because you don't want that just like, anyone grab a bat. You don't want that getting in the wrong hands. You kind of like, be a Bigfoot. Bigfoot, Paul, Iona, the entire group, people are. You want to keep an eye, you want to lock that down.

Oh yeah. No, yeah, people are ensuring that, first off you have prisoners, so people are figuring out what to do with the prisoners, and then also there's a lot of, there's not just the collars, there's other equipment, just general weapons, miscellaneous odds and ends that need to be secured and stuff like that. All of that's happening. While that's all happening, and then many other different things.

Like I said, the town needs to be secured in addition to the cathedral. And then making sure that all the little... there's no hidden nooks and crannies of what you're working in. I was like, I wouldn't mind... well, I really wouldn't like, I guess, gather Orion's remains at one point. I'm like, yeah, going through Ludmilla's desk or something like that, looking through the notes, or anything like that, that might have been of use. I don't know, but then it's like, well, when do you get the chance to do that? Like, are you doing that after? You kinda need to pick what you're doing.

It's that kind of like, where's, where am I? Do you do that once the dragon's defeated? Yeah. Do you do that while everyone else organizes? Like, what am I going, because again, if it's that kind of thing of like, right, everybody, we need to go kill this dragon. I'm going to look for some clues.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. In a minute. Ah, maybe I'll send the Berger Master to the Lyd Millers. She seems to really hate her. How do you phrase that? Because giving her a direct order might not go down well. I assumed it wouldn't go down well. Yeah. I just assume maybe, maybe isn't an assume, but considering she also detested that Miller that maybe that she wouldn't mind doing that. But also the same time I am afraid of her. Mmm. And other things. Strange. It's a complicated relationship the two of you have.

It truly is. And I'm coming down. I'll perk myself up at some point. Strange it's a complicated relationship for two of you have Coming down I'll perk myself up at some point. Yeah, I think cocaine losts. I look hey Yeah, I'll put my cops who might be listening. I obviously don't I've never done illicit drugs I've got me neither. So I don't I don't know how long cocaine stays in the system But I feel like you would still be under the effects of your initial bump probably but you'd also want Yeah, we're gonna keep the party going. Well, yeah, I mean if you want absolutely you'd have a little another little something I mean, he was pretty exhausted. Yeah Yeah

even just like talking out loud and just to seeing like kind of Right where we need to, we probably should, Iona, myself, Bigfoot Paul, Virgin Master, cabinet should be with you mostly. Yep, just to be like, right, so we're gathering the weapons, we need to take inventory, we should probably check out all the offices upstairs, if there's anything there that is going to be of use.

I kind of look at like either Bigfoot Paul or Iona, if they have, if there's anything there that is going to be of use. I kind of look at either Bigfoot, Bigfoot, Paul or Iona if they have, if Bigfoot, Paul and Iona are busy organizing people here. Yeah. You don't have access to them right now. Yeah. Right. They have grayed out in the party select. Gotcha.

So for people to assign, you have currently Gora Blushen, Tarpass. Oh yeah, I was so happy. Yeah, the Berge master. Should you wish to, should you wish to try to assign her a job? Yeah, something and is that actually yeah, I think so yeah that actually might be it and pip obviously He's not talking to the engineer right oh wait. No. I think you wanted him to supervise I'm super yeah, so it's Corb Lushen Tarpos and the virgin master yeah, those are your options I've never been so unhappy So it's Coroblushen, Tarpos, and the Virgin Master. Yeah, those are your options.

I've never been so unhappy, Adam. We can look for sensitive documents! This game is nothing but a lot of unhappy events, one after the other. This one's just going to eat the sensitive documents. I've seen him do it before! I, the wizard supreme, eating sensitive documents? I would never!

Okay, so what what is busy work that would get them away from me? God, um, oh, do you want them handling prisoners? Probably not. That's really all they're qualified to do right now. Yes. You can get them in the crowd and just be like, rally the troops generally. or just be like, rally the troops, generally. And just, if you don't know what they are, you might be terrified of them. Oh, Lord. Well, here's the trick. Do you trust Tarpos to do anything?

Cause they can, not supervise, but they can help assist Tarpos. Yeah, I guess cause Tarpos at the moment, she did kind of what went, the best thing, which was the recon. And I'm, honestly, I want to ask her what the hell have, like what she did, like in terms of where they were. Where she's been basically.

How that all went, giving me that kind of sit rep as it were. So I don't know, so I wanna have a conversation with Tarpos and then it's just kind of like, with the Virgin Master, I don't wanna tell her what to do, she tells me what to do, I don't know. And so. Maybe you could make a suggestion.

Yeah, well I don't know, would she be open? I don't know which should be opened. I don't know I feel like I'd be stepping over my bounds. Yeah I guess who are you me talking to a waiter? It's weird things I'm not really in charge, but I've sort of ha ha but it's kind of big football I'm also in charge, but I'm sorta, ha, am, but it's kind of big foot, I'm also just around here. Whew. You can probably do it yourself. You're not doing much else.

But I'll be like, it's the Virgin Master, like what are your plans here with, I just did the pit basically. I want to be there to, I believe, if you recall, our deal was that I would be the one to drive the stake. Yes, of course, of course. So I will be traversing down with everyone, but I do not, I will not be in the first group. Am I needed around like doing anything?

Probably not right now. Now that everyone everyone now that control has been reestablished There's no specific job for you to do. Okay any job you feel capable of doing really? All right top us Go to Lushen. I assume the ritual went well. I sort of look looking at Corovat Lushen's and you would you digs? Assume news drip If you would like if you would be open tos, new drip. If you would, if you would be open to it, I'd like to hear what happened at a later date or a later point if we can survive all this, but for now, could you help some of the wounded, some of the injured?

That'd be much appreciated. Tarpos looks over at the wounded being carted away back to the infirmary at your HQ. I can help, yes. Gora Blushen Strong can carry people. Yes, my lady! My lady, we will serve you well! Serve her well! I think I will serve her greatly!

Yes, you will serve her well. You will serve her. You will serve her. Exactly. Exactly. You will do an incredible job. Bo greatly! Yes, you will serve her well. You will serve her exactly. Exactly. You will do an incredible job. Both. Yes, you will. They begin competing to see who can carry more people, despite the fact that they're really carrying the same people. Never wished I knew the spells. Yeah, but they're somewhere slightly further away.

And they're gonna get further away as things go on. I've never wished I knew the spell silence so much in my life. Truly the worst of us. Truly the worst, the worst of us. We'll see to sick. Thank you, thank you. When will you be joining us?

I'd just see to the pit. Could. When we are going. Where are, if she goes and treats the sick and... No, she can treat them as they're living. Yeah, will help, yes. Gora Bloshan too? Yes.

Yeah, probably should, she says. Yes, can help. Right, I'm just like robbing my snout and temples. I'm going to, so I'm going to go and gather Orion's remains and have a look in Ludmila's office. Orion horse? Yes, Ludmila severed, did some.

Severed to outer world. Yes, and then stretched to the point of a, in atrocity, just a horrible thing. Tapos takes a deep breath in, a deep breath out without, without warning, she steps in close and embraces you. She pulls you in close and holds you tight. I might cry at him. Fair enough. She pats, she not pats, but she like, you know, comforts. Comforts, yeah. Thank you.

I just, yep. Thank you. Yep, I just like, I try not to break down. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. But I'll embrace. Death is sad. Yes, very sad. She nods slowly.

Perhaps you might. She takes a deep breath in. I mimic her. Yeah. Nice. Perhaps after this, you might know a nice ritual to put her at peace. I will help Orion commune with the earth. Thank you.

I kind of straighten myself up. I'm going to Ludmila's office. She nods. Before you go, actually, maybe she does one more thing. She reaches into her, reaches into a pouch and produces a quite, because Tarpost has clearly never washed this before. It's, when I say dirty, I mean, it's dirty with mud, not with what you might otherwise expect.

She produces a handkerchief, which is dirty, but with mud. She offers it to you. otherwise expect. She produces a handkerchief, which is dirty, but with mud. She offers it to you. Thank you. Wipe my face, but also dirty at the same time. It's nice. You muddy up your face a bit. Thank you.

Does she want it back or is that like a gift? She waits as it, she seems to be waiting expectantly for it back. I think I did it. Yeah, yeah, cool. Thank you. And I head up to Ludmila's office? Well, yeah, it's funny. You have to go outside and go back in through the entrance.

Yeah, there's no other way up there right now. That's so funny. Yep. Well, it takes a little longer, but you get up there. Meanwhile, the engineer, do you know his name? I don't think I asked it. Yeah, no one's asked his name. doesn't offer it the engineer begins barking orders at the five people who have been assigned to him. Mm-hmm Hover it there

hammer in those pegs Keep it moving. There you go Can't use that here But he yeah, he starts giving orders instructing people then at a certain point he moves in and he turns around. If this were any other creature, the expression on their face, they would have an expression like, am I allowed to, like uncertain. He has no expression.

It's just a blank look when he turns back to you. He is quite clearly about to flick his hand out and bring out a tool. With that blank expression, he looks back at you, Pip, as if he's waiting for approval. Go ahead. He nods. And then he flips around and he uses his hands changed between the myriad of different tools and he starts using them to weld pieces together, to fix things. Slowly but surely, you, well, as part of the, as part of the working, you see that the machinery

of this place, what's left, what's still connected, gets turned on, and that conveyor belt starts moving again. As it moves, he starts weaving and making into its steps. Whoa. It, it's, I think he described it as stairs that move. You watch as he makes stairs that move. Huh. Is this guy like a cyborg?

What is this? Yeah, yes. A little robot man? He's soft and special. A little robot man? I don't know. Am I mad at an android right now? I think he's just an amoral guy with robot hands.

Over the course of the next 10 minutes, he creates an escalator into the depths. Wow, okay. When I thought, when he said stairs would move, I thought they, you know, like shifted around. Not that they, okay. Like a staircase with little feet. With little legs or something. I estimate that these escalators should be able to carry the weight of at least 25 men at a time. Well, that's good.

That's better than the road. That includes an average amount of armor and weaponry as well. I've averaged out the amount of equipment carried by the people here. You can safely carry 25. 30 maximum. Wouldn't go over that. Right. Okay. He turns around, flips, no, he doesn't, sorry, he doesn't have a notepad on him. He, his

hands rapidly go through all the different tools until it stops on a little thing holding a piece of chalk. And then he starts writing out an equation on the wall for you. I, you don't have to, I believe you. You don't have to write the... No, this is each individual person here and their averages, in case you want to mix and match. Right. Okay. Sort of above my head.

He assigns every individual that he can see immediately a letter and number and then gives you a breakdown of their equipment and then how much it weighs he Estimates and how it would affect where they are placed on the escalator It's like it gives you even an optimum order if you want to carry the most people at once It's like the absolute opposite of the durak hard castle way of doing things There's too much math here and not enough improvisation He's drawing vertices Parabolas happening all sorts of shit. Yeah, okay. He's drawing vertices. Parabolas happening. All sorts of shit going on.

It's all going over Pip's head. I mean most of it anyway. Yeah, alright, thank you. That should be good. That should be enough. Do you need me to break this down for you? Uh, maybe not for me, but for some of the others.

Who maybe don't quite get what you're putting down. Right. Aren't quite picking it up. You can't tell if that was sarcastic. It's genuinely impossible. Does he break it down for me and give me the like optimum? Oh, are you asking him to do it? Because he doesn't, if you said for some, if you said break it down for someone else

and then didn't specify who, If you said break it down for someone else and then didn't specify who he doesn't break it down. It's like he's waiting for the order. Yeah, break it down, break it down. Right. He starts explaining it to you as... Oh no. ...slowly. Yeah, okay.

You can follow some of it. Right. You can get safely up to 30 people, but that would be sacrificing tactical decisions. Okay, sure. Okay, cool. Cool, cool, cool. So if you wanted kind of a mass assault,

you would go 30 at a time. Yeah, okay. But if we wanted to go a little more strategically, we could tend in like 10 to 20. 25. Yeah. 20 to 25, okay. How long, I mean, you'll find out like the triple take.

Yeah, yeah. So like 25, then you can put like after say 10 minutes, is it then 25? Yeah, I probably would ask that. That's probably what year. Oh, with the escalator, it'll only take five minutes to get from the top to the bottom. This is all part of the,

Yeah, yeah, okay. And I guess, you know, maybe is there a flip switch so you can kind of come back up. What about getting people back out? Well, what would we do there? That would be a simple matter of reversing the engineering. Okay. I can do that from up here.

Yeah, right. Pip thinking about how he's going to have to smooth this over with Hector, how involved the engineer is here. But yeah, I think we'll get you to that. We'll leave somebody up here. We can send a signal perhaps, and then you can flip the switch and everyone can get back out. I could probably send you down with a switch to reverse it.

I'll need cable. He starts looking around. Yeah, that might be a good idea, because otherwise I don't know how we're gonna communicate to you that we need a quick evacuation or that we're done. So yeah, if we could have some manner of reversing this escalator, yeah, that would're done. So yeah, if we could have some manner of reversing this escalator, yeah,

that would be ideal. Yes, he says. He seems to be uninterested in what you're saying now. Okay. He wanders off and starts collecting cable. Alright, I'll continue supervising you and I'll wait until I see Hector return out of the... because I imagine the moment I see Hector in the catwalk, I'll clock him, but don't do anything about it. And then I'm waiting for him to come back out so I can explain what's going on. Hector, you have only a little bit of time.

Creating the cable with the switch at the end of it is not a very difficult task. I go over to where Orion is, and just start, how do I go about dismantling it, I guess, and trying to do this? Because it's kind of weird to be like, and then I fold up the remains of my old horse. Orion is stretched out on hooks. To release, you would need to unhook. I start, yeah, I just start unhooking as much as I can, but at the same time, even just, maybe just like unloading on Orion as just like, you know, what has happened, how Hector has been feeling going, you know, it's like very in like large, you know, brushstrokes here about the like you were the first, when I first summoned you, I didn't expect what

would happen and I thought you were just a gift from Pena or the equivalent here, Lord of the Light, maybe, the Morning Lord, one of the two. I don't know. And I just don't know. You were something I could, tangible that I could hold on to and now you're gone and it's my fault. I left you with her and she... I don't understand. Her and she...

I don't understand. We were given these cards, these cards to be this destiny, destiny to do what? Yender is dead, Gorgosh is a fucking vampire. Esmeralda is turned by a dark god and then turned away by me and then there's this engineer. I don't know what to do. I don't even know what to turn to. Everywhere I go everyone is either oh so so so hung up on the hate of the past. They can't see me first for the trees, or I need to sacrifice everything that I think I need to do so that we can move forward. And if I do that, then I lose others and it's just not simple. It's just not that simple. And then fold Orion up,

or at least try to like, I don't know, respectfully. Yeah. You know, roll him up. Roll him up. Like you might have lied. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. To respectfully like- Making sure Orion doesn't touch the floor.

Yeah, of course, of course, of course. Yeah, just to kind of gather the remains. Is there like a sheet, something like a sheet or something in here? You search around. And you see there's like an open chest filled with odds and ends. Looking over it, it immediately looks like taken possessions from people, probably adventurers who came through here and were killed and then equipment that was deemed perhaps too nice to throw away but not nice enough to be put anywhere important. It's just yeah just a chest of some things that are obviously of a slight amount of

value and in there you see there is a silk blanket which you pick up to wrap Orion in. As you pick it up underneath it is revealed as morelda's false leg. There it is. Speaking of, is there anything? Yeah, I get you. Just grabbing that wrapping up Orion and then you're looking around the room, taking it all in.

I'm sure we'll get rid of this one, hopefully, but somebody else is take a place. Before you have time to properly look around the room and consider anything else here, a voice calls out, presumably pips, to alert you that everything's set up. Escalator's done, Hector, when you're ready. Yes.

What? I don't, you're going to have to come down. I don't hear a what. I look out. Maybe I say that as you say what I like turned up somebody else. I'm like, he'll be here in a second. You look out the window here. Well quotation marks window.

You look out through that viewing, that viewing hole to the space below, and you can see... Obviously, Hector doesn't know what this is and doesn't have the words to describe this, but we can all imagine an escalator. It's like stairs that move. You can't hear, but you can see as the engineer holding the little clicker thing on a really long cord explains to Pip how to click it to turn it one way and then click it again to turn it the other way. It also has a little button to stop it completely if you need that. Cool, cool. The up arrow brings you up, the down arrow sends

you down. Okay. The circle button stops it. Oh yeah yeah, okay. Pipp's intelligence, a little insulted. I'm across it. Thank you. Right. If you need me to explain that to anyone else, break it down. I'll be right here. He says, once again, sarcastic? Hard to tell. Hard to tell with this guy. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, clocking that. Well, still speaking to our eye and just, and now we have Pip working with that.

But I have also, well, I've worked with Pirran. Strange bed photos, eh? I, yeah, I start heading towards, heading down towards the escalator. Sure. I'll try and meet Hector away from the engineer. They're still trying to keep them separate. Yeah, okay. So that's, I don't know if you heard me yell.

Yeah, something about some escar- It's called an escalator. It's like stairs that move. Like not a snail. No. What? I don't speak Candanese. That's a Candanese dish, right? escargot. Yeah, it's like they fry up snails. Yeah, but not like Bob Barrett No, no, it's not really blue beach. Specifically. It's not the garden. It's that specific never mind

Okay, um, so it's it's it's going to take down 30 maximum at a time But if it's 30 people at a time, and it's five minutes there and back. But if it's, what's five minutes there, sorry. 30 people, that's, I mean, if we want to swarm the dragon, that's what we do, but it can send 20, 25, if we want to be a little more strategic about it. Send 25, in five minutes, 25. Five, five, exactly.

Five, five, five minutes. Have I still got, is the cable long enough that I could still be holding the little clicker? Yeah, okay this I can control if it gives up and down The up arrow you get it Put my hand up like come on. Yeah And then yes, so if we need to pull out, you know quickly we can we can get out within five minutes The escalator goes the whole way down

now the engineer, they will work with us, they'll come down there and fight the dragon, I assume. They don't really seem to have what you might call allegiance to anybody. However... What are they? They look like a halfling to me. They're sort of a halfling, they... Imagine... This would be my read on them. Imagine Pirin with less cowardice. Oh, that is terrifying. Yeah, and they're sort of more pronounced

moral... what's the word? Emptiness, I suppose. Lack of? Yeah, a more pronounced lack of morals. We don't have to work with them, Hektor. We've done fine without Yen Duren, without a Gohgesh. We can lose another one. That's fine. I know what they allowed to happen to your horse. What they were complicit in and what they made. When we first entered Kuchiri, Pirin killed a homeless man and made me bury his body. Yeah, that is true. Yeah, that is true.

All I have is his, his word that that he was going to betray us. Right. That he had betrayed us. He was going to betray us. I don't know about this place. Corrupts us all in the end, right? Even a silver dragon is not immune. Yeah.

And I am not as powerful as a silver dragon. So this engineer, as much as I loathe it, is already been proven to be somewhat useful. He's already been proven to be somewhat useful. Perrin has techniques that I would not agree with, but he has proven to be useful. We don't know what Ludmila had over him. We don't know when he decided to do anything or what she made him do. Giving him a trial. Big football is right. He's right, be a kangaroo caught. We are.

I think you'd be sent to the gallows if we left him here, really, and that's as may be. It's your choice. What is another one, eh? Add it to the pile, where it's all right. It's okay, we are the good executioners our blade has been blessed we're the morally right ones rather be killed by our blade and theirs theirs is evil right well yeah I mean I imagine he doesn't want to be

killed by anyone but I see your point let's keep him with us for the moment, and if we decide down the track to turn him loose, we turn him loose. He will help us here, and perhaps with what is coming next. Yeah, hey, perhaps it's a matter of the devil you know, huh? Hey there, fellow adventurer. If you're picking up what we're putting down and want more D&D content, we have just what you need to scratch that itch. D&D is for nerds plus, the symbol not the word, where you can listen to select campaigns

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