D&D is For Nerds - Barovia IV #2 In Carriage, On Horse and By Foot

Episode Date: August 16, 2025

I hope this is not a mistake, I hope this is the right choice. If there's a chance we can end this with no more bloodshed, no matter how small that chance is, wouldn't I be a fool to not take that cha...nce? He can lead them in my stead. He's done it before and I know it did not end well. But he's grown since then. He has faith. I just hope the faith he puts in me he can put into himself. It would be much better spent.If you're still wanting to pledge for the Jarren's Outpost Board Game you can right here! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, lads, did you miss out on the Jaron's Outpost Kickstarter and wish you weren't such a big doofus? Well, fear not. Late pledges are now open and they'll be open for a little while, so just head to Kickstarter search for D&D for Nerds or Jaron's Outpost and slam that late pledge button. ACAS powers the world's best podcasts. Here's the show that we recommend. I'm Mark.
Starting point is 00:00:31 And I'm Ryan, and you might know us from our award-winning CBC podcast, Let's Make a Sci-Fi. But we want to tell you about our brand-new show, The Town Show. On The Town Show, we are building a fictional town. Every week we invite a guest comedian on to riff with us about new citizens, new buildings, historical landmarks for our made-up town. The best way to describe it is, you know that Simpsons poster with every character on it? We're trying to create that, but in podcast form. So listen to The Town Show out every Wednesday, wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcast everywhere.
Starting point is 00:01:09 Acast.com What matters most to you? Is it unforgettable adventures, connections with lifelong friends, peaceful moments of reflection, feelings of joy and freedom you can't wait to experience again and again? Or is it the vehicles that help you make all those special moments. possible. Whatever your answer is, Toyota is here to bring you closer to the things that matter to you, because they matter to us too. Toyota, for what matters most. Although you see no water for miles around, you are, like us, marooned. You're stranded in this sad
Starting point is 00:01:53 and lonely place called Borovia. To mix metaphors, we are incarcerated. The fog that surrounds us are the bars of our dungeon, and Baron von Strad is out jailer. As far as I can tell, there is only one way out, and that is to kill Devil Strad. All of you go to Kelova, cleanse, and then we're on the way to Valakai, and I just sit to the lodestone in the lake. Yeah, it seems like a good plan to me. As I'm leaving, I just lean in, when I'm gone, you need to make a fucking deceit. and make it a good one.
Starting point is 00:02:32 And I leave. Hector, you know that Rahadian is waiting for you by the gates to Couturey. He came with a wagon and horses. You can go straight to him if you have nothing else to do. I think I would have had
Starting point is 00:02:49 yeah, just said goodbye everyone. Let's a snarky remark. Probably the last thing I did. Definitely would have had some, you know, maybe more closer goodbyes. Maybe some interesting, fearful, but some... Intimate. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:03 Anyway, I don't think there's anything else I would need to do in Couturey, apart from, like, again, what we've sort of... I imagine that whole conversation had... That was like the 10th hour. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Of, like, a preceding nine other hours of like... Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, back and forth. Yeah, for sure.
Starting point is 00:03:26 Oh, probably before I'd leave, I'd check it on Iris and then see how she was doing and making sure that she was, I guess, recovering well. Give me one sec, because I know exactly what's happened to Iris, which sounds suspicious, but it's... It's not ominous, I promise you. Oh. Iris has your nose looking quite haggly. Well, it's just better to smash it. I'm telling you with it. What?
Starting point is 00:04:00 Huh? Iona has arranged for Iris to stay with Matild. Do you remember? Yeah, yeah, Matild's. So you head just out of town and to Matilds. You can see that there is smoke curling out of the chimney. You see Matild's two children playing out the front as you approach. Both of them get up and then run inside.
Starting point is 00:04:23 I forgot about Matild. I guess this was also like, all right, cool. Look, two birds, one stone here, because it's a polite boy. I'll knock on the door. Yeah, well, this is great. I'll say, yes, I thank you to Matilda and Iris. You hear a bunch of latches, and you realize that after the kids ran inside, the door was locked. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:45 And the door opens, Matilda is standing in the doorway. You can see that the, what's it called, the chain? Oh, yeah. What's that called? Is it just called the chain? Yeah, door chain. The door chain is still attached For whatever good that would actually do
Starting point is 00:04:58 Not that you ever would, I assume But you could very easily force your way in If you wanted to The door opens and Matilda is standing there Is it a good morning, good evening, good It would be good evening Good evening, Matild I just want to
Starting point is 00:05:14 I'm heading off and I just want to Thank you for your hospitality And also to check in on Iris Matild who this After she opened the door she's been pointedly I don't know if you remember this but this is something that a lot of the people of Couturey do
Starting point is 00:05:28 she's pointedly staring down not making eye contact she says how do you say like oh you can like hey you don't have to look at me look down it's fine but at the same time you don't want to be like look me in the eyes
Starting point is 00:05:41 giving an order and you're like it is okay I just like my eyes are up here that's what you should say yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah you foot freak No, I just Yeah, I just Like, also like
Starting point is 00:05:57 Maybe try to catch her eyes then To kind of like You know, I'm pulling a criminal intent I like it You can kind of try to like you know If they're like trying to avoid you You are trying to like look them in the eye In a non-authoritarian way
Starting point is 00:06:11 If it's any shape or form I'm making them uncomfortable Of course I'm going to stop This is just me being like Trying to be hey We're equal It's fine. We cool. And I just want to thank you.
Starting point is 00:06:23 You actually helped me out. You did me a solid. I just want to say thanks. You catch her eyes for a brief moment. And the second you do that, her eyes go really wide in shock and horror. And then you immediately are like, ah, I fucked up. I'm sorry. I just want to say, thank you so much.
Starting point is 00:06:40 You really helped us. Of course. And I hope you're doing well. Would you like to speak to Iris? I would love to. And even if I could have like, you know, maybe I had 10 gold, and now I have nine gold. Yeah. To give them as a thank you or something like that.
Starting point is 00:06:58 She takes the gold and says, thank you. It, but you did, though, you need not. You have saved this town from a terrible evil. It is honestly. She closes the door, but only so that she can unlatch it and then opens it for you. Okay, cool. Well, then I would give it as a thing. You step inside.
Starting point is 00:07:18 You can see that the two kids. have once again been sent to their room. The door to their room is closed. Iris is here in the main room, though. Yeah, that's good. That's good. I was like, it's so much you're like, you didn't need to send the kids away.
Starting point is 00:07:32 It is, like, it is fine. Like, no one is, there's no ill, ill, ill intent. It is, they can play. It is fine. You don't need to put yourself out any more than you already have. You don't need to secrete them away. She nods.
Starting point is 00:07:46 You are, you are, I'm like, I want to ever, you, you're safe. She nods, but you can see she doesn't really know what to do with that information. Nothing happens, I understand. But you've got to say it. Iris is sitting at the table. You can see there's a bunch of papers in front of her, and she has a very messy, because she's never really been taught how to use one, but she has an ink pen that she is dipping into an ink well,
Starting point is 00:08:11 and then she's drawing pictures with. You can see she's still from her ordeal. she's still a bit like her limbs are longer than they should be and you can see that there is some disfigurements lingering effects lingering effects yes do I would I know enough to think that that will eventually settle down or is that just going to be like yeah that's just a bit of a scar
Starting point is 00:08:35 there will be kind of yeah there will be some elements of this will stay with her for the rest of her life but it is definitely going to die down more than it has already Well, let's say that something. Yeah. She looks up at you and gives you a bright smile as you approach. I give her a bright smile back and ask her, is it okay if I could sit next to you? She nods and moves a little bit so that you can sit down next to her.
Starting point is 00:09:02 Matild goes off and starts to brew a cup of tea, a pot of tea. Thank you. Hello, Iris. I'm about to head down the mountain, and I don't know if I'm, I do not know if I'll be back or I hope to, I'll get to see you again. but I do not know if I will. So I just wanted to come in and see how you are going and if you are okay. She seems pretty unbothered, actually. She seems it almost for a brief moment you could imagine that some terrible, awful events
Starting point is 00:09:34 have not occurred to her. She, looking at the papers, you realize she's learning how to draw her name or write her name. You can see over and over again various attempts at Iris. Oh, no, wait, Matilda does not have a surname. name. You can see various, various attempts at Iris and maybe also some attempts at Matild and then, I don't think you ever learnt their names, but the other two, you presume the other two children's names.
Starting point is 00:10:00 Adam, you know, to put the knife in, eh? We were busy. We had stuff going on. You see, the other two children, their names would probably be Strossack and Vavina. Yeah, we did not learn. No. That's okay. We would have made fun of them. You were busy. I'm not trying to...
Starting point is 00:10:17 They're silly names. I feel no guilt. You and Pip do not feel guilt. Taking a real... They're not real people. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just seeing how you're going and making sure that you're okay. She stops for a second in the middle of drawing the second eye in Iris and says,
Starting point is 00:10:42 mm-hmm, doing well. That's really good. That's nice. Yeah, she's a very lovely person. What do you, um, is there just like this, is it just writing or is it drawings or anything like that? It's just writing, yeah. She's just writing attempts at her name over and over again. It's mostly pretty good.
Starting point is 00:10:58 She's definitely come a long way since when she first started. Well, her name is pretty easy, but you see, are probably Strossack. She's struggled with the most. A lot of asses. Yeah. I'm like, oh, I then I act sort of maybe ignorant and be like, oh, what are you, oh, what are you drawing? and try to, like, yeah, yeah, what are you drawing there? What names have you, um, what names have you got there?
Starting point is 00:11:22 She points to Matild and says, Matild, she points to Strossack and says Strossick, and she points to Vovina and says, Vovina, and then she points, yeah, she hasn't said Iris yet. She points to Iris, and she says, Iris, that's my name. Ah, ah, it is a very beautiful name. I am, I'm Hector. Do you, do you know how to write that? She thinks for a second, does she? She gets to the C
Starting point is 00:11:52 and then she looks at it and she's very confused. You can see she's made, she's trouble at that point. Nice. It is, yes, it is odd, but there is a K after the C. She draws a very halting, but decent because she's had to do K for Strossack a few times. She draws a K. I kind of like it. I think I will spend
Starting point is 00:12:12 maybe an hour or so just kind of Yeah, like, I think I've learned penmanship. No, nowhere near as good as Pips. No, but you would have, I mean, you're in the church. You probably spent some time. You actually might have comparable skills to PIP actually. Nowhere near. I mean, it would be fine.
Starting point is 00:12:30 I can do my eyes shot, dude. Yeah, okay, okay. Pip is like a virtuoso. Yeah, he's something else. Okay. Like, if he here didn't, like, properly dot those eyes, he'd getting wrapped over the knuckles. It's dunk me in the ice bath or whatever. Honestly, I think you were getting wrapped over the knuckles for not dotting eyes.
Starting point is 00:12:45 properly as well I don't think they necessarily would have been as harsh or taken as much care in it as the Church of Bones The poor penmanship on your part wouldn't have been seen as like
Starting point is 00:12:59 an affrontal A symptom of my filthy soul Yeah Yeah yeah Yeah there's a little bit of a difference Yeah sure But yeah I think yes I could probably spend a lot of time here
Starting point is 00:13:10 Just to kind of like Let the kid be a kid And start like you know writing things, maybe you start drawing things, all those kind of things. She seems more interested in names. She has no interest in making drawings. Again, just let it, like, you know, her
Starting point is 00:13:24 lead the way and then start writing things down. And, like, if I can, teaching her some very basic, like... Does it look like she is lacking in knowledge of, like, the alphabet? Or... Yeah, she... She was up until learning to do names, she's completely
Starting point is 00:13:40 illiterate. Oh, okay. Okay. Well, then, yeah, I will just, like, yeah, real basic stuff. Sure. Just sort of spending some time there. She knows some things. Clearly Matild has been
Starting point is 00:13:50 teaching her some of her ABCs. And while you're teaching her, Matild comes with a pot of tea for the two of you to share and then she starts going around. You can see she's just doing housework. I invite Matild to kind of
Starting point is 00:14:06 sit down as well and maybe kind of like weirdly just to have a little sense of normalancy. You think, well, Mittelt's not, like, trying to avoid anything. Like, as she's going around doing housework, she occasionally stops and then will also offer things to Iris. You think this was probably what was happening before you arrive. You don't think, you think this is normality to them.
Starting point is 00:14:33 Oh, that's good. Oh, that's good. Yeah, okay. Then, yeah. I just spent enough time, like, here, maybe an hour, maybe a bit more, and then. you're doing incredible well I'll tell you what if I find the time
Starting point is 00:14:46 and you write I guess Raven I'll send you a letter Her reading comprehension is as good as a writing basically In that it's not good Yeah Yeah yeah
Starting point is 00:14:58 Yeah like a few times I'll write something And like hey look Do you know what this says? She can do your name now She can do the names of everyone in this house And maybe a couple names Of just people around town that she knows and that's kind of it
Starting point is 00:15:12 Okay Well, if Oh, and the alphabet She knows the alphabet She can't form words with it yet though Well, if God's willing I will I will try to write you sometimes
Starting point is 00:15:23 Maybe if And Matild Maybe she can help you read it Would you like that? Who are you addressing that to? To Iris Would you like that? Iris, who's maybe like engrossed in
Starting point is 00:15:35 She's, I wouldn't say gotten bored with your name But she really wants to get her name right and she's gone back to her name, really engrossed in that, and she goes, uh-huh. I hope, um, I look at Matilda. I hope she's not too much trouble. Matild shakes her head slowly and says, no, it is not burdensome. Really good to know.
Starting point is 00:15:55 If she needs anything, just... Ayona has already provided. Well, if you need anything more, just go to Bigfoot pool. Now, he'll make sure that everything you need is taking care. I will. Thank you very. much. Goodbye.
Starting point is 00:16:11 You get up, you leave, and you head to Rahadin. Yeah. Rahadin stands in the, like I said, it's blizzarding outside. Rahadin stands in the cold as if it doesn't harm him. He wears thick, heavy furs. You can see you, this is not the first time you clocked to this. As he came into town, you realized this. He himself is a dusk elf, the same as Elaniel and Herkin.
Starting point is 00:16:36 You see he, he wears, in addition to this. those heavy furs. He has like a thick woolen scarf and then what are that? Yushanka hats? Oh yeah. Okay. He has one of those on his head. With gloved hands, he smokes a long, very long comically almost pipe.
Starting point is 00:16:54 And when you get close enough, he lowers that pipe and speaks to you. Can I, as I'm walking towards clicking at all, he's like he's breathing, right? Like there's breath coming out. Like when he's like in the cold, you can kind of see that. Like he's... Get a good boy card.
Starting point is 00:17:09 Oh, a lucky duck. You just throwing the card after picking it up. You can see, yeah, there is mist fog. Sorry, I should say, not mist. There is fog, whatever. Yeah, you can see condensation. Condensation. Actually, I don't even know if that's the word.
Starting point is 00:17:27 Whatever, there's the smoky. I think it is condensation. Yeah. What's the one that's up with P? P. Precipitation? Precipitation. Uh, what is the mist that? that comes out of your mouth.
Starting point is 00:17:43 No, isn't precipitation? There's something to do with the water cycle or some shit? Humidity. Humidity. Humidity. He's breathing humidity. Okay, precipitation is any liquid or frozen water that forms from the atmosphere to the earth's surface. So probably not that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:57 Water vapor you're saying? Water vapor is the answer. That's not. Water vapor at all. Wait, what was the other one we said? I don't think that's right. What condensation? That's like usually when
Starting point is 00:18:10 Steam, apparently. It's steam. I guess that makes sense actually. Yeah. Because, yeah, condensation is the droplet on the glass pane or whatever. I suppose it's steam. That seems, that's insane, but I suppose it is. Yeah, well, anyway, this steam coming out of his mouth.
Starting point is 00:18:26 Ah, dragon, I run in fear. Yeah, smart. Okay, so he's alive. Yes. Yeah, okay. He's breathing. Yes. He, when you get close enough, he speaks.
Starting point is 00:18:36 The journey to castle Ravenlo. is not for the faint of heart. Few dare to tread this road, and fewer still return. The master has taken an interest in you. Does he take an interest in many people? Rahadin considers for a moment and then says, some, but I think you are of particular importance. He opens the door for you.
Starting point is 00:19:02 Thank you very much. As I step in, did he take an interest in you? when you before you worked for him No no no But of course I am not special He says
Starting point is 00:19:13 And he closes the door Hmm Yeah Step in and take a seat With a Yeah The horses spring to life And the carriage trundles
Starting point is 00:19:24 Its way down Mount Gakas The interior of this carriage Has a very gothic vibe To it It's black leather seating On either side With red velvet curtains, which you can draw to, well, you would imagine they're designed to keep
Starting point is 00:19:42 the sun out, but for you, you can draw them for privacy, if you wish, as well. Very heavy, thick. I was imagining red cushions for some reason, but no, black makes more sense. But I was imagining red, too, for some reason. There is a folded woolen blanket here as well, should you want. Oh, that's nice. Is it chilly? the biting cold from outside does permeate the interior of this cabin as well you get the impression it was not designed for warmth
Starting point is 00:20:10 right okay well i'll wrap myself up and i'll open up the curtains to kind of look out into the whatever we're seeing um yeah there's not much unfortunately for you to see on the ride down from mount gacchis as i said the blizzard it's not white out conditions but it is thick enough that it's difficult maybe actually impossible to see beyond, say, 30 feet in any direction. Okay. Well, in that case, I'll just close those curtains. Just sit back and just kind of, yeah, contemplate, like, what have I gotten myself into? I should add as well, it's dark enough out that you wouldn't call it really a chandelier,
Starting point is 00:20:56 but there is a lantern hanging from the center. of the center of the roof that as soon as you stepped inside it sprung to life and a soft glow illuminates the interior of this cabin. Very cozy. Yeah, it is very cozy. It feels like he should have a mug
Starting point is 00:21:15 of hot cocoa. Okay, well I think maybe for the air can I reach up and maybe try and dim it or is there anything to kind of like... You can dim or yeah it's got a little dimmer or a dimmer switch where you can make it brighter or less bright or turn it off.
Starting point is 00:21:30 I think I'll, I might just turn it off, close the curtains, and maybe for the first time in Borovia, try to go to sleep knowing that I'm safe. Okay. That's crazy. Yeah. You, as you fall asleep, you can hear Rahadin softly singing to himself, If on a winter's night I should encounter butterfright.
Starting point is 00:21:56 And then you fall asleep. With that little lullaby. pretty cozy in this carriage on your way to certain doom. Yeah. Meanwhile. Pip, what are you doing? Well, I assume
Starting point is 00:22:11 we're gathering supplies for our trip down the mountain sort of like and into the woods to the lodestone. What supplies do we need? We don't, we can't, horses we don't have
Starting point is 00:22:23 no carriage either. Rations for the most part is what you'll need. You can see Cavendish has already got this sorted. In fact, you're kind of ready to go right now. I got a bad boy card, and you find it odd. Why Cavendish say, lose a gold piece. Players lose one gold piece, players' choice.
Starting point is 00:22:43 Pick, one of you loses a gold coin. I'll lose a gold coin. Mark it off. I'll throw it in a wishing well. Mark it off. Get out your character sheet. You fucking... You heathed.
Starting point is 00:22:55 I was like, I'll take it the gold piece. Whatever. As I get out, it's just trundled under the wheel. Okay. He lost the gold piece. I don't have to write it down. You won't know. Thank you, Zammert. Who are you even going to write? I don't have a gold piece, probably, somewhere. Infuriating. Anyway, you...
Starting point is 00:23:13 I find it odd. Yeah, you find it odd that John Cavendish would have spoken earlier about needing to prepare to leave when it seems like he's already made sure that you're prepared. Okay, I go up to Cavendish and I'm like, wanted to give them sort of something of a head start. Was that the thinking? Yeah, something like that. I felt it best to separate the group. Well, yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:34 I mean, you don't run ride in to think we're following him. Sure. He says, sure. Oh, speaking of, I guess before we'd gone, we'd probably have organized Pyrrion in that as well. Yes, yes. Pyrrion will be taking the horse and trailing. Trailing behind when he can, yeah. I'm assuming that he was thrilled.
Starting point is 00:23:51 Yeah. Well, he hasn't really got a choice in the matter. Resigned, is maybe how I'd describe it. The burgeon mistress probably gave the impression that she was going to make sure. Actually, the burgeon mistress and Bigfoot Paul, actually, you know what, realizing that he's going to be left alone with Bigfoot Paul and the Berger mistress, neither, both of whom he fucked over pretty badly, he maybe left that meeting being like, yes, I guess I can do it in a week.
Starting point is 00:24:24 I'll start, yeah, I'm healing. I feel better already. I feel better already, yes. Definitely, I feel like I could fight I feel like I could fight off a barbarian and a mage Even if they were working together Even if they were sharing one body I met the Birch of Mistress He's just also, you know, there's another barbarian and a maid
Starting point is 00:24:49 Gorob and Lush and are yeah very clearly his nemesai as well Yeah, he's got a lot of nemesia Yeah He doesn't make a lot of friends Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah, I feel bad for him. I do a little.
Starting point is 00:25:02 Yeah. Okay. Well, that's on you then. Be it on your way. Okay. To Cavendish, I'll be like, how long do you reckon we give them? Well, they'll be traveling faster than we will regardless. We could leave now, and it really wouldn't make a difference.
Starting point is 00:25:20 What time is it? It's getting on. It's past midday. I would say it's like three. Yeah. So the sun will be. setting soon. Probably maybe we spend another night here so we're not traveling, you know, in the dark.
Starting point is 00:25:33 Well, very well. Yeah. And then head out first light. I caution you, though, both Iona and Tarpos are quite keen to get going as soon as possible. And because of that, Gorob and Lushin are also quite keen to get going as soon as possible. Yeah. Well, that's a more difficult person to sway. Yeah. Well, maybe it's best to head off straight away then.
Starting point is 00:25:59 Yeah. Well, very well then. All right. Well, I'll go arrange everyone, I suppose. One moment, Pep, if I may. Yeah, of course. I understand you cop it from a lot of different angles. Yeah. I mean, you know, sometimes deservedly, but not always. Well, that's a very adult of you to say. That's a textured sentence
Starting point is 00:26:26 There's layers to that Yeah Have you Beyond the rebellion a year ago Have you any experience Leading soldiers I mean A couple of small skirmishes
Starting point is 00:26:39 With the Sharpshard companions But there was always With Durek At the side You know So not solo No not really Have you ever been in charge
Starting point is 00:26:48 Or was there always Someone else above you To give you orders Um, yeah, I guess I would say there's always been someone above me, in some capacity. Well, perhaps then, this is something that you simply don't have the experience to know. But you could be a general who makes good decisions, and you could be a general who makes bad decisions. But Pip, you cannot be a general who makes no decisions. Yeah, I see what you're saying, Cavendish. I see what you're saying.
Starting point is 00:27:19 I'm going to go get the rest of the party. I, for what it's worth, wish you luck. Wish us to lock. I believe that, Kevin Dish. I really do. But... What matters most to you? Is it unforgettable adventures?
Starting point is 00:27:37 Connections with lifelong friends. Peaceful moments of reflection. Feelings of joy and freedom you can't wait to experience again and again. Or is it the vehicles that help you make all those special moments possible? Whatever your answer is, Toyota is here to bring you closer to the things that matter to you. Because they matter to us too. Toyota, for what matters most. Anyway.
Starting point is 00:28:05 Very well. I'll go and collect the others. The miscreants. The rest of the trouble. You head back inside. Pyrrion is changing Pyrrins bandages. And you can see she's taken a certain. level of pleasure in
Starting point is 00:28:22 dabbing an iodine solution on his wounds, which is quite clearly, it's painful for Perin's. And Iona is appreciating, enjoying the fact that this is for his own good. Sorry to spoil the fun,
Starting point is 00:28:39 but I think we're the intention is to leave as soon as possible. Good. Iona stands up. She finishes dabbing. She gets one little dab in. One less lick in. Yeah. Pyrin winces one more time. Very well, Zen.
Starting point is 00:28:53 I have all of my things packed. Just give me one moment. She, please. Heads upstairs. Is it just me in Pyrin? It's just you in Pyrin for a brief period of time. Okay. Hey, look, I mean, I don't know what sort of leverage you're going to have when you get there.
Starting point is 00:29:11 But please stop him. If it looks like he's doing anything stupid and he probably will step in for me, for us. What are we determining is something stupid? I don't know. If you get there and he's down on his knees with his neck to the side and you can see the glint of Strad's fangs. And I'll stop Strauss. Just try and get him out of there. Or if he looks like he's going to, look, yeah, look. I'll do what I can, I suppose. Yeah, yeah. Look. Look. Whatever. Yes, I'll do what I can.
Starting point is 00:29:52 Okay. Man, morale has never been higher. Fiff, we must bloom where we are planted. Ain't that the truth? When Iona comes back, I guess, myself, Iona, we'll go find tarp or scar up and lusian, and then we'll start heading down the mountain. Hoods up, gloves on, heads down. Full hearts can't lose.
Starting point is 00:30:16 Full hearts can't lose. All right, you start making your way down the mountain. You, unlike Hector, are going to need to make a random encounter check. Yeah, yeah. Our favorite. Yeah. Hey, where's Pop? Is Pop with us?
Starting point is 00:30:30 Tarpos is keeping track of Pop. Tarpos maybe, honestly, maybe Pop's trailing behind Tarpos. Okay. Just not like far, just behind Tarpos. As long as Pop's coming with us. Yeah, every now and then as you trudge back down Mount Gakas, you hear the... That's good. There's a comfort to that
Starting point is 00:30:49 If you get too close at any point Pop will kind of Pop full on runs towards you spreads its wings That's so scary dude You're getting attacked by a goose But there's a comfort to that Pops sharp bite on my ankles
Starting point is 00:31:04 There's a familiar nature to that You know A familial nature Some might say All right I got good news And I got bad No I got bad news And I got bad news
Starting point is 00:31:15 Which do you want first Hit me with the bad Is it bad and worse? Who's first? Who's first in your line trudging? It would probably be either Garub and Lushin or Cavendish. Sorry, either Garob? Who's Gorub.
Starting point is 00:31:31 Garub? You said Garub. Gorub? Gorub. It's G-O-R-O-B. This is my accent, dude. Gorob and Lushin. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:43 Or Cavendish at the front. All right. Well, Pip. Yes. You spot. As ahead of you, you see John Cavendish comes to a halt suddenly, and he puts a hand up to gesture for everyone else to come to a stop. Okay.
Starting point is 00:31:58 We do. What? What? What? Trapp. We're surrounded. I flip up because I'm pretending I'm at the back, just because I'm a bowman. I turn around to look behind us.
Starting point is 00:32:10 Can I see anything? You see nothing. You see, like I said, there's a blizzard happening right now. You can't see further than 30 feet. in any direction. Beyond the snow, all you can see, and by beyond the snow, I mean just there is snow that you can see, but also you can see enough wagon trails to indicate where the path is.
Starting point is 00:32:30 It's a criss-crossy section down. You can see some boulders and some very, either very dead plants or some plants that have lost their leaves for, well, it's kind of always winter here, but some plants that have probably lost their leaves for the deepest part of winter that you are in. Surrounded by who? By what? I'm not sure yet. Just all movement?
Starting point is 00:32:55 Is that what we're saying? No, there's a trap. Can I, keeping my eye basically behind us, turn around to look what he's sort of talking about? He gestures... I guess keep my wits about, because I will have to turn around. He gestures in front of him, and you can see, sure enough, there is a snare of sorts set in the trail ahead of you it would for the next person
Starting point is 00:33:18 or for the first person to step into it you would be grabbed and dragged away okay you can tell actually you did pretty well you can tell that this snare is not made by mechanical means it's magical means
Starting point is 00:33:32 it looks very natural in it's like if someone made a tree that did this it looks like the work of druids yeah tapos with the druid is Would the druids know we were coming?
Starting point is 00:33:47 Druids know many things, could know. Right, right. Everyone get ready, I say. And then I'd like to plunk fire a bolt into the snare to try and activate it. The bolt hits the snare but does nothing, but it makes, well, it doesn't do nothing. It makes it very obvious that you've seen the trap and so they spring it in here. Those dead trees turn and start sprinting towards you How did I not see that?
Starting point is 00:34:24 And then from in snowdrifts Several humanoid figures explode out to join them You can see a clutch of four twig blights And two druids Okay, okay, fine, no big deal. This is good even. You hear, as the two druids, speak druidic to each other. It sounds like noises of the nature.
Starting point is 00:34:50 It sounds to an untrained ear. It would sound less like a language and more like just call signs. Yeah, okay. They're kind of like bird call and animal noises, yeah, yeah. Yeah, you can't tell what they're saying, but you can tell they're speaking a language, and then one of them points at Tarpos. Both of them lunge forward, and they seem to focus fire on Tarpos.
Starting point is 00:35:10 Okay. One of them Takes out a bolus Swings it around in their hand And throws it at Tarpos As they throw it, it splits again And again and again Becoming like a set of a root network
Starting point is 00:35:25 It slams into Tarpos Raps around her And with a solid Boom She hits the ground Fuck, okay Another one throws a second ballast But this one keeps a rope
Starting point is 00:35:37 attached to the druid It also wraps around Tarpos and then that druid starts dragging Tarpos towards her. Oh. Pip, it's your turn. Crank Durax crossbow to fire. And, well, okay, I'll fire it at the druids. I'll fire one at two, one shot at one druid and another at the other one.
Starting point is 00:35:57 You deal 12 points of damage to one of the druids, bloodying him. Great. So one of the druids takes the, that would be the first one who threw the initial bolus. You see, you shoot him in the gut, he doubles over. you can tell that you have killed him an hour from now. Fuck yeah. The other one, about the same amount of damage. So the other one also takes a pretty bad blow,
Starting point is 00:36:22 and you can see that that is going to bleed out if they don't look after it, but both of them are still in the fight. And I'd like to yell to everybody. We fought twig blights before. Freeze and then flame. Iona goes next. Looking, you say freeze and then flame. She looks around, and she looks around at, like, the snow that you're in,
Starting point is 00:36:46 and then gives you, like, a look like... Yeah. Yeah, probably. She throws a bowl of fire at one of the twigblades. It hits, and I'm going to say it counts as well. It's all gold. She deals double damage. Oh, yeah, she deals 20 points of damage.
Starting point is 00:37:04 One of the twig blights goes up in flames, and that leaves three twigs. Twig blights, two druids. Okay, okay, baby, here we go. Then it is John Cavendish's turn. He starts drawing his little flintlocked pistols and bang, bang, bang, bang, he shoots four times, dropping them and drawing new ones as he goes. He takes out two more of the twig blights, leaving one left. Easy. Gorbon Lush and descend upon it.
Starting point is 00:37:39 No. No, actually, no, they don't. Gorob and Lushin watches Tarpos gets dragged away, and you watchers both of them enter a rage. Oh, no. My lady! They sprint towards that last druid. Not that last druid, sorry, both of them are still standing. The druid dragging Tarpos away, they sprint towards that druid.
Starting point is 00:38:07 Yeah. The druid drops the rope. throws up its hands as if it's about to surrender and then Gorob and Lushin descend upon them. Like a rabid animal. They bite, kick, punch.
Starting point is 00:38:22 They don't even cast a spell. Jeez. They're just fully just using their tongue and teeth. That druid dies. And it dies, she dies slow. Yeah. Or quick.
Starting point is 00:38:33 I guess it's a relative. No, no, quickly. Very quickly. But they keep going. Then, it is Oh and then it's the engineer's Turn oh yeah the engineer's with us
Starting point is 00:38:44 I keep forgetting about the engineer He also fires a bolt of flames at One of the twig blights Striking it and I'm not gonna roll Because I think minimum damage would still kill it Nice He kills one of the last twig blights Oh gosh then it's the druids' turn
Starting point is 00:38:59 The surviving druid turns and runs Can I plug it as it's heading out like fleeing? Sure, you can fire at him Yeah you get one hit and that's enough you fire a second bolt into the retreating druids' back he bowls over
Starting point is 00:39:16 hits the ground and lays still in the snow is it weird to see druids this far up the mountain yep I turned to tarposs what were they saying Gorob and Lushin
Starting point is 00:39:26 with one mighty tear free Tarpos from her binds she they they fuss over her I was going to say I help her up but I don't imagine
Starting point is 00:39:37 my lady I, we are so sorry a blow aimed at you that we should have taken I'm sure she forgives We are slime I'm sure she forgives you
Starting point is 00:39:48 Your feet I'm sure she We have failed you for the last time Say the word my lady And we will fall upon our sword There's really truly no need Tarpos Although
Starting point is 00:40:00 Tarpos What were they saying to They were speaking druidic I couldn't understand it I'm assuming you can Maybe that's really rude. They, uh, they said, get Keshkar ahead, she says. That's a lie. Well, why, I don't, why would they want Keshka's head? Uh, he, leader, she says, you, listen.
Starting point is 00:40:22 I'm trying to tell us, I know you're lying to me. I'm just trying to make it easy for you. Lying? Yes. What, what were they really saying? You know, I mean, what, she shrugs didn't hear then. Okay. Was it? I mean, I don't know what you think it could be that it would affect what we're going to do. Like, I don't know. Can I make that a persuasion?
Starting point is 00:40:45 Yeah. Yeah, well, never mind. God. All right, I'll go over and I'll search the bodies of the druids. Okay. Figured out myself then, Tarpos, that's fine. That's, you know, I'm trying to help, God damn it. Okay.
Starting point is 00:40:57 It's like, not telling you the truth. They were so worried. You're like, I don't care. I just, like, you're not in trouble? I don't give a shit? I think I give a shit, Tarpos? Maybe I'm saying that is. looking through the body.
Starting point is 00:41:08 I think I give a shit, what your problems are? You find a, as you're searching them, as you're, uh, turning them over, you find that, oh, I suppose you find like 12 gold coins in a, in a pouch made out of a rat. I still, yuck. Yuck. I'll still take the, I'll empty the rat out. Sure. You find, in addition to that, actually, you find some.
Starting point is 00:41:37 Equipment has some alchemy components of course. Oh, yeah, of course. Fabuloso. You find a diarist wolf heart. Oh, two doses of elemental spirits. Nice. One dose of flump spores. Three pinches of shadow. Five gassed guts. Jesus. You find the whole damn gassed. Where are gassed guts? They're... Oh, gosh, good graved dancer, innards. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. and three unicorn horn. Oh, my God. Is there anything on the... Yes, sorry. In addition to that, I should have said. In addition to that, you find a piece of bark that has been torn off a tree.
Starting point is 00:42:20 And on the piece of bark, you can see a crude map has been drawn. You do not know what the map says. And a second piece of bark, which has also been, obviously, torn off a tree. You can see there is a... An artist's quote-unquote depiction of you, of Tarpos, of Gorobin Lushin, of who else? A bunch of, a ton of members of your party. You, Hector, Cribbitt, there would be Elaniel, Esmeralda, Gorban Lushin, Tarpos, and Yender. You can see that the depiction of Tarpos has been circled.
Starting point is 00:43:04 I like turn it around to tapos. Don't know what this means, I'm guessing. Mmm. I imagine, I like also open it up to, I guess, Cavendish. I'm guessing the thinking here is maybe revenge for what we did with the tree blight. At this exact moment in time, Hector rolls over and just smiles. I don't know. He just feels happy.
Starting point is 00:43:35 Just feels pleased to be alive. Cavendish takes less interest in the depictions as he takes more interest in the map, to be honest. What are we looking at? Well, I don't really know what this is, but this could be a map. Well, a map is more interesting than something we already know. Yeah, fair enough. So they know we're coming, though. I mean, we know that much.
Starting point is 00:43:59 so i imagine that the node however fortified it was previously doubled that would be my guess and watch out for further traps i truly wish topos would tell me i mean she knows she clearly knows if she does she's acting like she can't hear you right now yeah i'm sure she is he's like just just staring at the back of it because she knows she knows she knows She knows what's going on. Not telling me. Again, I can't imagine what it could be that she thinks would, you know, in some way
Starting point is 00:44:37 affect the way this whole party. Yes. You can't tell where the map is off. In my sleep, I stretch out. Cavendish shakes his head. I can't make hard nor hell of it. Iona. Any idea? Iona has a look.
Starting point is 00:44:53 Iona tracing the line. There's like a path. on the map. She traces that path and there's a like an X marks the spot sort of thing that you hadn't really you honestly thought
Starting point is 00:45:06 that that was just a flaw in the bark itself but she traces the path to where that little floor is and she says I think that this is perhaps a indication of an area
Starting point is 00:45:20 and this area is where we stand right now and she gestures she follows that path as well you still kind of I think it does look like just a floor in the bark. She could be wrong about this. But, if
Starting point is 00:45:34 she's right, this path looks like it leads straight to the lodestone. Okay. I would like to squat down and make a concoction. I would like to make what would this be I don't have any quadal
Starting point is 00:45:50 eggshells. Fuck. I need something to check if I'm being scryed. That's my plan. Except I have fucking nothing God, I don't want to waste to formy and I, they're so useful
Starting point is 00:46:08 Resistance to energy, there's really only one that wards against far seeing Well, you know what, I don't have any ingredients to make that Never mind How would they know we're here? Oh, I mean, we got a spy? Are you once again asking I like squat down
Starting point is 00:46:29 fiddle through all of my potions and my ingredients and they go and stand up. Cavendish gives you a look like like the idea of a spy is remote but also very concerning. Yeah. Wizard Supreme. I say. Yes.
Starting point is 00:46:46 God. Can you check if... Of course I can. What? Sorry, what did you need? Can. You idiot, listen to the man, Wizard Supreme, turn your ears on, you fool, turn my ears on, you turn your ears on. I can't, I can't even remember the last time you listened.
Starting point is 00:47:14 Listened? To what? After all the thunderous spells you cast, you disgusting worm. Worm! I am the Wizard Supreme. Who are you to call me or am? I'm rubbing my snout so hot, I'm starting to fire, dude. Gorup punches both of their guts, and they double over.
Starting point is 00:47:37 As they're, like, doubled over, I'll put an arm on their shoulder and be like, hey, could you check if we are being scried right now? There is no magic that can detect us scrying. That was Gorna. That's just not true. It's just not true, actually. You know, for a beard for me to tell you how to do your job, but that's just not true.
Starting point is 00:48:00 Lushin stroking his beard says, perhaps a spell could be constructed. If but I had a moment of quiet. Yeah, yeah. All right, then shut the hell off. Go on, Wizard Supreme. I will keep my mouth shut for as long as it takes for you to construct your spell. Honestly, I don't believe that.
Starting point is 00:48:24 I don't think that's true. I don't think he's going to do that. Lushin starts buttering to himself. Okay. I don't know if it's just buttering in frustration or if he's making this spell. Is he making the, is he doing it or is he just pissed off? Is it making the spell? Is he just buttering?
Starting point is 00:48:45 This is something a little like, you know, I don't know, like one of them asking for quiet, you know? It just feels insulting. It just feels insulting. It just feels insulting. It's so rude. With a flourish, Lushin finishes casting his spell And it takes him about, by the way, it takes him like half an hour to cast this spell Is there like maybe a snowbank we could kind of get out of the wind?
Starting point is 00:49:12 Nope You're pretty exposed the entire time It's either exposed on this part of the mountain or exposed in another part of the mountain You are sodden, wet and miserable you, the entire party takes six points of cold damage. Fuck. That's fine, six points. You'll survive.
Starting point is 00:49:30 Oh, except Tarpos. Yeah, of course. Who won't tell me what's going on? What does she think gonna happen? I don't care. Lushin finishes casting his spell. Yeah. And a 10-foot dome springs into radius around you.
Starting point is 00:49:48 It's kind of like, it looks almost like a, Obviously, you wouldn't say this, but it looks like a force field, like a shimmering energy field. The wind, as soon as it springs into existence, the wind stops, and the temperature immediately rises to a comfortable level. It's actually, you wouldn't call it, like, a summary or anything like that, but you, like, you could get around in just a shirt in this temperature. That's amazing. The snow all around you within this dome begins to slowly, then rapidly melt, and you can see. see the ground, it's within this dome, it is
Starting point is 00:50:25 comfortable. I'm imagining this snow hitting the top of it, making like a sound, sort of sizzling as it hits. Well, this is nice. We are protected from scrying. It's not quite, that's not quite
Starting point is 00:50:41 that's good, that's good, that's good. Can you tell by protecting us from scrying if we were previously? No. Being scried. Gorob. You idiot, the man asked if you knew the name of the person scrying us. That's what I asked. I just wanted to know.
Starting point is 00:51:06 But how long will this last, this bubble? Eight hours and not a moment longer for the spells energies. Sap even my strength. I wonder if there's some... It's like the evening, right? Yeah, it's becoming nighttime. I wonder if it's maybe worthwhile bedding down here. John Cavendish, who you see,
Starting point is 00:51:31 who was probably standing next to Gorop and Lushin. You can see he's got a finger in the ear that was on their side. You see he's kind of like clearing it out, you know? Yeah. Yeah, so it sounds... Protected from the weather. I mean, I don't know if we're going to get a better protection, you know, further down the mountain.
Starting point is 00:51:47 If we do, it's not going to be this temperature. And considering we're going to need to... our strength and I don't want to get further fucked up climbing down the mountain you can all fit within this dome but I'm letting you know that it's snug that's fine
Starting point is 00:52:01 I mean as long as no one touches me that's fine there's kind of no way to know yeah that's honestly to be comfortable to be a comfortable temperature in Brovia is I imagine such a rarity that I don't even complain well you set up camp
Starting point is 00:52:16 here for the night and you're taking watch I assume how are you breaking that up? I'll take first watch and then we'll just try and evenly distribute it I guess I'll go first watch then Garab and Lushin
Starting point is 00:52:31 Tarpos Iona Cavendish And then I guess the engineer I trust the engineer To wake us up if there's danger The engineer is not going to betray us Unless in the middle of the night Someone comes along and says
Starting point is 00:52:45 Hey you should betray them But that's not What about Iona? Did you say Iona? Iona is second to last. Second last. I mean, you could always do it in groups of two. That's maybe probably a better idea, actually. So somebody's watching, you know, this is a nest of vipers if I've ever been in one.
Starting point is 00:53:03 So, no, not really. But I'll go maybe myself and, no, I don't want to go myself in Cavendish. He's judgmental at the moment. I'll go myself and Iona. Tarpos and Garbon Loshin, Cavendish and the engineer. All right. You settle in for not a safe night's sleep, but a comfortable night's sleep. Yeah, hey, I'll take it, dude.
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