D&D is For Nerds - Buried Beneath #7 Ashworms

Episode Date: April 11, 2017

In which our heroes begin to explore the tomb, reluctantly. Shane needs to be healed, Antonthinks it all sounds like Antiques Roadshow and Squim would normally buy dinner before hetakes damage.Want to help support the show?Sanspants+: sanspantsplus.comPatreon: patreon.com/sanspantsradioPodkeep: sanspantsradio.podkeep.comUSB Tapes: audiobooksontape.comMerch: redbubble.com/people/sanspantsradio or teepublic.com/stores/sanspantsradioWant to get in contact with us?Email: [e-mail] Twitter: twitter.com/sanspantsradio Website: sanspantsradio.comFacebook: facebook.com/SansPantsRadioReddit: reddit.com/r/sanspantsradioOr individually at;Adam: twitter.com/RetroArchetypeJackson: twitter.com/AlldogsaredeadShanks: twitter.com/timtimfedZammit: twitter.com/GoddammitZammit Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Peloton all access membership separate learn more at onepeloton.ca slash running hey everyone a few announcements to get through before we get into today's episode. First off is that our sister show, Plumbing the Death Star, is performing at the Sydney Comedy Fest on May 6th and 7th, and then heading up to Brisbane a few weeks later on Friday the 26th. Just head to sanspantsradio.com slash live to purchase your tickets. Also, we've launched our new membership service, Sans Pants Plus. It's very similar to Patreon. In fact, you can use your Patreon login on the site if you'd like. But to reflect the new

service, we've made some changes to the reward structure. And while the $5 tier remains mostly unchanged, for $10 a month, you'll be getting a heap of bonus content in the future. The first is titled The Plumbing Boys Play Slash Ruin Sunless Citadel, as well as suggest a topic for any of the shows in the Sands Pants Network. And for $25 a month, you get to suggest an NPC for Adam to use in future campaigns and a D&Ds for Nerds season pass, which means as soon as we have a campaign ready, you'll be the first ones to hear it in its entirety. Just head to sanspantsplus.com and sign up today. Welcome to episode seven of Buried Beneath, a D&D's for

nerds adventure. I'm Jackson Bailey and I'll be playing the part of Anton de Saussure. I'm Michael Shanks and I'll be playing the part of Squim Norton. And I'm Joel Zammett playing the part of Shane Knoll. As always, I'm Adam, your Dungeon Master. Previously. Your camel does not appreciate being whipped one little bit, and so rears backwards and you fall off the back. This level is entirely empty. It's just one large open area, except for a single stone jutting out in the dead center. Traveller, you stand upon a place known as Alapomanda,

secret place in my tongue. We have buried beneath here something we are not proud of. Something evil. Watch your backs. I know she's healing us right now. Guys, did anything awesome happen in the last 60 seconds that I missed? Literally, we only watched you as you reeled around the crib and everyone got out their dicks and was just like...

My name's Squim is an acronym, and each letter stands for something, and the M on it stands for Mr. Hands. A massive crack or rift appears in the seal, and the seal breaks neatly in two. She doesn't say anything, but you know she blushes when you say that. You're in. I'm detecting magic in her heart.

Moving from the slaves' quarters back to the main room, you now have one less door to search. Sick. Jackson, can you push the little dice so it's a trip here? All right. Where are we going? So we're going back to that. Roll it again, Jack.

What is it? Six. All right, we'll go number four. Number four? The blue. I wasn't expecting that. Okay. It opens into expecting that. Okay. It opens into a very long corridor.

It stretches out beyond where your torches... This isn't exactly the scale. Yeah, right. So it stretches out to where your torches and even your extended elven eyesight can't see anymore. All right, let's just open the other door as well. I have a... And I know you don't like me using spells, but I have a...

With light, do I have to be holding that, or can I move it? You cast light on an object, and then the light stays with the object. So you could cast it on, say, for example, a grain of sand, and chuck the grain of sand. What do I have? Do I have, like, beats?

I've got a crossbow. You could cast it on my bolt, and then I could shoot the bolt down. Okay, I'll do that. It's like some sort of weird like dropping the light down the hole. But horizontally. Yeah, and I can shoot up to 80 feet. You can shoot beyond that.

You just have massive penalties to accuracy. Okay, cool. But you shooting down a corridor is not that big a deal. Yeah, that's just true. I cast on it. Whip, light. You cast light on the crossbow bolt and fire it down the really long corridor.

It looks like the corridor, it's hard to judge exactly, but you would say the corridor's maybe 250 feet long. It's a long corridor. Let's table that for last. Come back that, and we'll go through the other one. Same concept.

Cautiously. Move the die there, because that represents a door. Oh, cool. Walk through. Shield race. Another short corridor with a door at the end. Yep. Walk towards that door.

Highs or lows? Highs. Highs. It happens again. A spear comes out of the wall to the side of you. It's a different side this time. So actually, your shield wasn't in the right place. But once again,

it kind of only comes out a little bit. So you don't get... Snap it off, negative, full spear. Sneaky. Here you go, Gloom. That works. Gloom takes it again. Fascinating, fascinating, he says. I sarcastically get down on my hands and legs and like spider walk, but not with magic, just across the floor. Because I'm like, oh, it's fine.

I'm like, I know that I wasted it on the last one. You have it infinitely. You didn't waste it. I know, but it was like, I was holding on to that card. Whatever. I mean, I'm not mad. I just wasted it.

You know when you wasted it? By climbing down regularly instead of casting spider climb. That's true. Yeah, yeah, that's true. Next time we're going down. Or going up. Going up with you is going to be easy. You can cast that on others too, can't you?

No, not for him. Nah. Because he can cast it infinitely. It would be a little OP if he could cast it. Then just, if he has it, everyone has it. Nah, fair. I'm never going to use that fucking floor again. This is sick. Yeah, actually, fuck it.

Yeah, cast it infinitely. Cast from the ceiling, mate. Yeah. It's not Dungeons and Dragons. It's another role-playing system where they have similar to that. So a spellcaster gets unlimited magic. But there's, you know how if you're in space, your muscles atrophy because you don't use them as much? Yeah.

So in this role-playing system, forget the name of it, dragon something. But if you're a spellcaster, you use a spell to make yourself super strong, that kind of happens to you. That's the best. Or if you're a spellcaster who throws fireballs, eventually cold starts affecting you so much more. Right. It's just a funny little thing that I thought was cool. Sounds great.

That sounded real sarcastic. It was. Sounds great, Adam. Really nice. Sounds great, you little dragon game. You little dragon game for nerds. Sounds fine. Now let's get back to Dungeons and Dragons.

It's a role playing game. Can't remember the name of it. It's got dragons in it. Some dungeons sometimes are dragons, you know. So, can I get a it's called marching order, so who's where? At the back. Yep. At the back. Or should I be in the middle?

No, no, no. You're at the back. At the back. You're basically next to Gloom. Uh-huh. I'm worse than Gloom. Because at least if something comes from the rear, you can attack it, which we don't. I do have spells.

Would you like to be before or after Lilip? Before would mean behind Shane. After would mean it's Shane, Lilip, you. I'll go in front. It's a bit more chivalrous. All right, cool. So, you open the door, Shane, and this room is very similar to the last Slave's Quarters.

It's obviously the same room for the same purpose, with one notable exception. No, close it. Okay. Close it, shut the door, go. This large eyeless worm is as big as a horse fuck what a phrase and the way you said it made it sound like somebody on like antiques roadshow being like this large eyeless worm is as big as a horse and in some circles can go for as much as two thousand dollars it is covered in

a thin shitness layer of purple plates a nasty stinger Quivers at the end of its tail Alright This one's not in the book It's the paper I printed out It looks like a zerg Mixed with a starship trooper bug It looks real quite friendly In its head

It looks like it's going Oh hey guys It also looks like it's full of spikes Or like a centipede where you've cut off two-thirds of its legs. On its tail it has a scythe. That's the stinger. Yeah, it's a Gyarados from Pokemon, but purple rather than blue. You said it was eyeless, it looks like an eye. It is an eye.

I think it's got eyes. Alright. Oh, it can be an ass-hit in the desert. Not supposed to read, sorry. Unfortunately can be an asset in the desert. Not supposed to read. Unfortunately, we're not in the desert. I never really explained it. Now, I have alchemist's fire. I usually get very mad.

Oh, that's like the thing from Gods of Egypt that like the two ladies are riding around. Oh, man, that film. Yeah, yeah. Fuck, I love that film. I only watched it like a week ago. It's so bad. I kind of liked it like it's just in a shitty way oh yeah yeah it's like it's it's like it's a it wants to be a heist movie

but it's not quite because it's weird because both factions are kind of doing a heist at the same time and the good guys are getting all their the the team together to do the heist yeah the villain is also doing a heist by collecting the other things, but you just don't know that until the final act, and you're like, oh, okay, I guess this is happening. Ah, piss yellow. Keep having the conversation. I'm just doing background stuff.

No, I just blew. I'll do, I'll do poos. Yeah, I'll do poos. I'll do poos. See you later. I'll do poos. See you when you get back. That film has, like, such a good potential a good potential, but did it miss its mark?

And it's like the worst kind of quips ever. Like the tone of the main kind of kid was so annoying. Just frustrating. Garbage. True garbage. But no, I highly recommend watching it because, man, Gerard Butler knows the film he's in. He's great.

He's real good. I was into him. Everyone else is like, this is a serious film. He's like, no, no, no the film he's in. He's great. He's real good. I was into him. Everyone else is like, this is a serious film. He's like, no, no, no, don't be foolish. Come on, guys. And like Paranormal Activity, The Marked Ones. And the two before that,

where they made that sneaky transition to comedy without anyone realising. I tuned out of that scene. Oh, Paranormal Activity, The Marked Ones is amazing. So this is movie hour on D&D's for nerds, but hey, here the fuck we are. So you know how in Paranormal Activity 1 and 2 like it's a horror film and it's like oh no this poor family is besieged by ghosts they don't know what to do and things get worse and worse and

worse until the family is attacked by the devil that's the fucking plot of all of them the march ones is like what if instead of a family it was some spanish youths yeah and they get hassled and hassled and hassled and they're like fuck it we're getting our cousins and they all get in a pickup truck shotguns and go to the place where all the witches are just start shooting them wait so it gets like a spanish gang together they're just like kids and they're not they're not spanish they're like mexican i think but it's just like so amazing where you're like oh these are the beats that it's supposed to hit but instead of everyone being like what do we do they're just like no fuck it let's get them it's amazing does it work do they do they kill heaps of witches then they which like full witches the movie ended up being about witches all of them are apparently like the witches bring the

day it's stupid but that movie is just a comedy it's just a straight-up comedy but nobody knew and nobody watched it for that and it's it's like one of my favorite films it's so good and actually the two before are funny as well but they're like sneaky funny no they're like sneaky funny I reckon anyway then the latest one was just true garbage it's a bit too spooky for me the latest one was just like here's the monster

you can see it on a magic camera sorry excuse me they see it on a magic digital camera they just find it in the attic and they can see it. So the camera's in the attic? No, they find the camera in the attic. They find the camera.

With the camera, they can see the devil, Toby. That's what he's called. So this camera is there for this very reason. Yeah, I think it was made by witches. So the witch has made a camera to see the devil. The devil, the whole good of it. But does the camera look like a camera camera? Yeah but it's like

It's like Almost like a Like a Like a cyberpunk camera Right Like an old VHS camcorder That's been No more like Aetherpunk

It's been magicked up Right It's real stupid It's a bad film And it ruined the franchise Which I quite like Thank you for listening The movie hour on D&D is for nerds

That did not go for an hour Keep going We've got a stall for time Anyway Alright, this horse worm Where even were we? Yeah, the horse worm This horse worm

Alright, good If it's eyeless If we're all real quiet We can just go How do the doors work with this one? Is it like a swingy open? Is it a pulley up? Is it a nice quiet door?

Nah, because if one of those pulls up He's like, oh, come here Slam it down on his head Rancor it How many pulley up doors do you know? I don't know I wasn't around I was imagining a garage

Yes, I was And 50,000 years ago Alice might have been like Garages are the best doors It attacks you, it goes first. So, it just charges. It opens its mouth, moves it and leaves all of us.

So, Adam, what door is it? No, it can't. Adam, no, please. What kind of door is it, Adam? I assume it's just like a metal door. I mean, a stone door. In or out? Either way. Because I can just close it. No. The ash worms are sick.

So, Ikea. Sorry? Is it an indoor or an outdoor? It's indoor. No, does the door close inward or outward? Oh, it opens inward. So, you pushed the door. So, I can pull it closed. But you could push it closed.

Yeah, that's how doors work. Well spotted. That's how doors work. Well spotted. That's tourist doors. So is it a double hinge? What do you mean a double hinge? So if I pushed it open, I have to pull it closed. I can't also

then just keep pulling it open as well. No, no, it doesn't go the other way. They haven't invented that technology. They barely had doors. So the Ashworm sl go the other way. No. That's what I'm asking. They haven't invented that technology. They barely had doors. Okay, so the Ash Worm slams up against you, Shane. And how close was everyone standing? I was up the back. I assume not very close.

So could you reach out and touch your good buddy, Shane? I want to say no, but I was picturing. Yeah, I think I was. I think I was. And Heisel, Lowe's for Lillip. Lowe's. Lowe's. She was standing right behind you.

And how far were you standing? I was told to stand quite far away. Quite far away. All right. That's not on me. That's how everyone's instructions were. So, Shane and... Swim. Swim. I'll go i'll go i'll go poo brown again i'm feeling a

brown brown boy today red the ashworm slams into you shane yeah you go five feet back oh shane you slam into swim you go five feet back. Squim, you slam into Lilip. Lilip does not go five feet back. You and Lilip are sharing... It's very cozy, quite tight. I make a quip like, normally I buy your dinner first, and

everybody cries. Then everyone takes damage. Normally I buy your dinner first. Ah! So is everyone standing? Presumably, yeah. Unless someone lied down. No, I thought maybe the worm had knocked us.

12 damage to everyone. Except obviously the people standing too far back. Me and Gloom. Shall we just go, Gloom? I got an idea. A dangerous idea. Super good. No. I'm happy for you.

It involves you. Yeah. Why did you take six damage? I had you on only 50. When was the last time you took damage? Probably the wraith. Wraith. Heat stroke.

Wraith didn't do anything to you. Oh, no. He fell on me. I fell on him. I fell on him. That's why I'm on six. No. 11.

Oh, that's right. I forgot again. Oh, excuse me. Everyone takes 12 damage and a fortitude save because of poison from the stinger when it slams you. Only the first person, so it's fine. Hey! So that's the good news. Would you like the bad news?

Yes, please. No, I don't. No, thank you. I'm pretty smug up the back here. first person so it's fine hey hey so that's the good news would you like the bad news yes please no i don't no thank you i'm pretty smug up the back here i just took your whole hp as the damage i should not get near this work not at all you should climb out of this hole and go back to Back to Opona. You lose. Oh, goodness. Goodness. Six points of constitution. Oh, shit. Oh, good. So. What's your constitution at the moment? Is it 10?

It's negative. Oh. It's 12. No. That'll be 10 for me. Yours is eight. Mine's eight. His is 10.

So your total hit points go down by 3 times 4 is 12. Yeah, great. And so do your current hit points. So your max went from 56 to 44. And your current went from whatever it was before to 26. That's not bad. That's fine. That's just like 6 more than I used to have.

Sick. And in a minute, you will need to make a secondary save or it happens again. Lilip. Lilip. Lilip, heal me. Lilip can't fix her con damage, though. She can fix his.

Not yours. His is from poison. Yours is from... Ghosts. The creature drained it out of you. Lilip, I don't feel great, but hey. Bullshit.

Fuck, that's a good response. And then it is Squim's turn. How high is the roof of this place? I'm asking for like a friend. Say if a friend of mine wanted to spider walk onto the ceiling, might he be out of relative

reach? The corridor is maybe 15 feet tall, so if you climbed up onto the roof the ashworm would need to rear right back up to be able to reach you but it could reach it could but it would be harder for it yeah you'd be kind of out of the way well i i might do i might i i run to the top of the corridor and eldritch plus if i have if i have room to that. You can spider climb up to the... Oh, wait. Did you have spider...

You had spider climb from before. So you still have spider climb, so you can do that. Yeah, that's fine. Awesome. And I'm right above it, hopefully, and I go... Down into its brain. You blast downwards. Your...

The blood rushes to your head. So when you're upside down firing you're a little woozy and your shot goes wide and misses you kick up a lot of sand and just blast a section of the sand wall just away but there you miss the somehow the ashworm which is kind of as large as the corridor you're woozy so it's all right hey you hit maybe the wall or something but you are now out of the ashworms not line of sight but out of its way so you don't think it's going to attack out of reach is what i'm quietly singing to myself and hoping lilip can hear no i'm not gonna roll it's going to but then i remembered you're in the middle of combat

she doesn't care no matter what. I'll never stop caring, Lillip. Shane, it's your turn. Right. Can I challenge this one? A fighting challenge? Or that's just for people who can speak my language? Yeah, you kind of need to share a language. Soz, mate. Totes Soz. So what does plus one AC mean? It just means you get extra AC.

So your armor class, instead of being 21, yeah, will be 22. And what does that mean? You're harder to hit. That includes its stinger, yeah? Yes. Oh, good. Ah, that.

All right. That barely counts as anything. You can still attack if you want. Oh, cool. Ah, sick, then yes. Yes, please. You hit it. You slashed it with your bastard sword,

dealing eight points of damage. You cut a couple of... Oh, does it have legs? It doesn't have legs. It has little spines. You cut a bunch of its spikes off. Tink, tink, tink. As they drop to the ground. Blood goes everywhere and it doesn't scream.

No, it makes no noise. I want to call out... It's generous. To Gloom as well. Is this 50,000 years old? I feel bad. How old is this creature? What?

Real old. Anton? To pass a thing to a person and to have that person pass a thing to another person, what's the go? Is that a turn or is passing it my turn? Are you throwing it or handing it off? I'm handing it off.

I'm basically going to hand an alchemist fire all the way down to my boy, Shane. You have to move up so you're behind Lillip. You've got to get close. Yeah. Free action to give it to her. She, free action to pass it along. Okay, I'll do that. And then I can still attack?

Yes, you can, yeah. Use your scorching ray. I just want to mirror image myself to spray you. Sure. No, I will use ray of enfeeblement. That can't hit us, right? Can I do it over the head? Highs or lows?

No, no, no, no, no. I didn't say highs or lows. I'm asking a question. He can hit someone else, yeah. With that knowledge, I would not cast it knowing full well that I could hit someone else. I will give chill touch to my chicken and beep, beep, beep.

And I will also use, what the fuck do you call it? Maximize. Sudden maximize. So, the chicken reaches up And sort of just clutches at it Yeah pecks Goes fucking at it

Everyone here has seen a rooster lose its shit At someone The rooster loses its shit at the ashworm That's the best The ashworm takes 6 points of cold damage Gotcha And loses a point of strength. Woo!

You're welcome. Then my rooster gets killed. Then it is Lilip's turn. Lilip puts her hands on your back. Hot face, Shane. Shane is also appropriate. I'm not super pleased about this. A little jealous.

Shane, you recover four points of constitution. Nice. Lucky. Back to normal? No. Nearly. Almost. Doing better than me, son. I think Gloom is doing better than you. I'm doing real bad. Things are not good for me.

Does Gloom ever get a turn? I don't think he can do anything. Gloom cannot fight. Can you use wands? No. Not at all? He's got wands. No, can you use them, though?

I mean, yeah. Because, like, you know, you're useless as shit. No, I can hit him with a chicken. That's true. I'm fine. You could ask for a wand. No, I don't need a wand. All right.

Don't be foolish. Good news, bad news. No. Who wants it? Bad wand. All right. Don't be foolish. Good news, bad news. No. Who wants it? Bad news. Bad news. Bad news? All right.

The bad news is that it's going after the chicken. Oh! Good news. Sorry about that noise. Yeah. Your chicken is a slippery little son of a bitch. Good on you, Romeo. It dives down at the chicken and just eats fucking shit.

With a crunch, the ashworm slams its face into the ground and kicks up a lot of sand but does not do anything effective. You're welcome. I can just keep Romeo running around. It's my turn? Can I summon Earthen Grasp to grab the stinger on the back of the worm so it can't leash it around? You can try. Success is not guaranteed.

Okay, I'll try. I'll go the yellow. Always bet on piss. Always bet on pills. Shouldn't have bet on piss. The Earthen Hand bursts out of the ground. Bang, bang, bang, bang. bet on piss. Always bet on pills. Shouldn't have bet on piss. The earthen hand bursts out of the ground. Never bet on piss. Bang, bang, bang, bang. Looks around trying to find the stinger, but the stinger's whipping around

so hard and so fast that the hand can't get a grab of it. It'll keep trying, though. Well, that's good. Don't tell the rooster to go near the hand. Crush. Just like feathers. By the way, the hand is as big as a man.

Yeah, I figured it was big. It's a medium creature. Hopefully this dumb thing will attack the hand. Yeah, and get got by the hand. And then we can all get it. Throw your alchemist's fire at him. Then it is... Oh, did Lilip hand me the alchemist's fire

as a free action? Oh yeah, Lilip hands forward. Seek. You throw the alchemist's fire? a free action? Oh, yeah. Lillipant's forward. Seek. Go look. You throw the Alchemist's Fire? In its mouth. You will take a point of damage from Splashback. And so will the chicken. How house is your chicken?

Mass of 4 HP. Get out of there, Romeo. Get out of there, Romeo. Do you throw the Alchemist's Fire? It'll hurt it bad. Ah, it's fine. Kill the chicken. How weak can we make you, Jack?

It's only his experience. It's fine. Goes down a level. Lose some spells. How neutered can I become? Lose some more hit points. Go down to eight. I will effectively be playing an npc very soon it's entirely up to you do do i know what did you call out to use this i would have that's the reason i passed it down i wouldn't have given it to you for no reason then yeah yeah i mean fair

maybe my chicken's evasive enough. No? No. It's worse than you think. Oh, boy. Ladies and gentlemen. Oh, no. The pain train is in the station. Oh, shit. You fuck up. Throwing an alchemist fire.

We all cook. Fuck. We're so tightly packed. But I'm up the back, so that's okay. You'd have to have got the thing as well. I surely had heard it appeared. Because I was thinking, like, just putting it in its mouth. Yeah, like throwing it down its mouth, like, in the end of 10-15.

I'm like, oh, in my mouth. All I gave this is a potion to drink. Good, good, good. Wait. No, that's just a fire. All he gave us is a potion to drink Good, good, good Wait No, that's just a fire See, I also have sun rods But that's a flashbang And it has no eyes

That's true We just all flashbang Well, gee ourselves So, have you ever seen someone like throw a ball But the ball kind of rolls off? Oh, no Yes That's what you do

Hell like life You want to hear the worst part? No kind of rolls off. Oh, no. That's what you do. Hell like life. You want to hear the worst part? No. It's a critical threat against you. I, um... Fist meets face. That's what it's called. Okay.

The attack hits you and is a critical threat. You must roll to confirm the critical threat. I rolled. Confirmed. You take double damage. Oh, good.

Oh, shit. No, wait. Sorry. I roll this. Bullshit. I forget. That's how this good. Oh, shit. Oh, wait. Sorry. I roll this. Bullshit. I forget. That's how this works. Oh, shit. Did I kill you? You killed you. I did not. Oh, shit.

Double damage and a d4 bleed. I guess I'm going to be playing Willip. I hope we all just end up neutered by this. You're still doing fine. You're doing great. Oh, man. You take 12 points of damage. Super good. That's not too bad.

Oh, you're on 26. No. No, you're back. He was on 34. Now he's on 22. Okay. So, every round, you will take 1d4 damage until someone makes a heal check on you or until you gain some hit points.

Magically. Lelup's got me. Yeah. Additionally. Also, that shield thing, that's good, yeah? Additionally. I don't like this. Your chicken.

Oh, bye-bye. Double damage. Your chicken takes two points of damage. He's alive! Hey! Yeah, Romeo! Come back to me, up inside my coat. Oh, we're not even close to done.

Finally, Lilip. Dios, Dios. Oh, no. Lilip is our healer. Just double damage. Lilip takes two points of damage. Oh, that's fine. Triple damage to dragons.

Okay. Oh, sure. Lilip is not. That's lucky. Would that have gotten me because I got dragon blood? Because Pappy fucked a dragon? No, you're too far away from it. Sexiest dang dragon in the land.

Finally, the one person we have forgotten. The one who is standing next to you but above you. Spiders man. I love spiders man. Spiders man. It's a man made of several spiders. I was bit by a radioactive spider. When alchemist fire flicks up and gets you.

It gets my hair. You're like, did the worm at least get also damaged? The worm? Worm dead. Insta-death. Normal damage. Worm takes one point. Fuck off.

Fuck my life. I get a bleed. Worm takes one point. Fuck off. Fuck my life. I get a bleed. Worm is like, that's fine. Okay. Worm's like, lol, whatever. Now, finally. Highs or lows? Highs.

You catch fire. Highs or lows? Why do I catch fire? Your chicken. Oh, lows. Your chicken catches fire. Highs or lows? Highs. Nah, you don't catch fire. I'm so good at this. Highs or lows? Highs.

Nah, you don't catch fire. I'm so good at this. Highs or lows? Lows. The ashworm does not catch fire. And Lilip? Shut up! He forgot!

Highs or lows? Highs. Lilip catches fire! We fucked this dungeon so bad. This clearly isn't even the main room. We were just like

we were going to the main room and we were like nah. We'll just have a little side journey. Oh my god everyone's on fire. Adam came up

with an extra room let's go check it out. Maybe there'll be some sweet loot. There wasn't. It was just fire and death. Fire and worms. How much does it take damage to turn into?

I don't know. That would be Lilip. Lilip, wouldn't it? It's me? No, yeah, Anton, then Lilip. Right. Then back to you. Put us out.

Put your chicken out. No, wait, then the Ashwam. You only just had your turn. That was the longest turn ever. I know, right? Fuck. This game sometimes. What were you trying to do?

Did you throw a grenade Yeah you tried to throw a grenade Alright Well I Drink the grenade I guess is what I tried to do No you tried to make it Drink the grenade

But you drank the grenade I thought it was Real delicious looking You got that slow break I was like You got that slow break You know I'm pretty thirsty Give it a drink

So Let's chat options Did you catch fire No your chicken caught fire My chicken caught fire What do you want your chicken to do Stop drop and roll pretty thirsty. Give it a drink. So, let's chat options. Did you catch fire? No, your chicken caught fire. My chicken caught fire. What do you want your chicken to do? Stop, drop, and roll?

Yeah. Then it's still next to the ash worm. Nah, come back. Then it takes fire. It's basically going to die. Stop, drop, and roll. Okay, so that's taken away my... Your chicken is no longer on fire. Fine.

So, I can't use chill touch, because my chicken's away. Ventriloquism. We'll do nothing. Rave and Feverment I could cast, but I might fuck everyone over. Okay. Mirror Image, useless. Acid Splash. We'll burn those in front of me.

Prestidigitation, message, days for humanoid creatures. Disrupt Undead is not undead. Or Light. So I genuinely I have no options I like the sound of that Light Crossbow it I guess

Still has a chance of hitting the front Fuck you Raven Fieberman Fuck it Go all out Why not Why not We're already here

Eh? Luckily we Eyes are? Luckily we- Eyes or lows? Luckily we quicksanded. Eyes. You criticaled someone. Let's find out. Eyes.

No. No. No. No. Come on. Shane. Shane. Why?

You press F12 and go back to elbowed. What's happened to me? Double damage. I've made you so weak. I'm sorry. Oh, God. Shane, you lose 12 points of strength. What?

Good. Shane, your strength is 5. You collapse because you cannot wear your armor anymore. Bullshit. Well done, mate. Oh my god. Well done. I would have preferred a crossbow in the face.

Well, gee whiz. Soon, Gloom will be the strongest member of this party Fucking hell Lilip, help It's Lilip's turn Help me, please Lilip She has a limited amount Can't help you enough in combat

She just takes the front line fighter position she steps over you and she swings at the creature she hits oh wait she's on fire she stops ups and rolls but she's standing in front of the creature so she's front line fighter

but she's standing in front of the creature alright it's the worm's turn the worm attacks Lillip the worm's turn. The worm attacks Lilip. The worm hits Lilip. Damn. The worm deals 12 damage to Lilip and she must make a fortitude saving throw. I'm so willing to almost just go.

Lilip's gonna lose some constitution. Oh god. Lilip is four points of constitution. I'll work out Lillip is four points of constitution. His touch is the biggest. I'll work out her hit points in a minute. Shoot, muzzle.

It's your turn, Anto. It's your turn, Squim. So, I'm... What's the hand doing? All right. Blue. You grabbed the one. Oh, thanks.

Oh, God. god Oh thank goodness Okay I'm above the Yeah you're above the fall So wait is the worm kind of in the room And we're in the corridor The worm is also in the corridor partially So am I above anybody who's on fire Yes you're above

Shane You're on fire I'm on fire I can't even roll Can I Oh shit On your turn You took Six points of damage

Can I No, what turn? You didn't have a turn From my water skin On to Shane I haven't had a turn Sorry Yeah, yeah, sorry

Can you drop your water skin on Shane? Yeah You sure can Okay And do I still have some more turn left after that? I'll allow that, yeah Okay You drop the water skin on him.

Haze or Lose? Haze. Yeah, you put him out. He's still bleeding out, though, but you put him out. Oh, that. Right. Blood.

Yeah, on your turn it happens. Gotcha. You are on fire and bleeding out. If you think the fire would have cauterized the wound, I'll Eldritch Blast him. You can. You hit it.

I kind of want a Burning Handsome, but I'm so afraid of using fire at the moment. Everybody just needs a fire. There's already a lot. Dealing 17 points of damage to the Ash Worm. Do that more. Oh, thank God. The Ash Worm. Do that more. Oh, thank God. The Ash Worm dies.

Super good. Everyone, just heal me. That was supposed to be an easy fight. Yeah. And now we leave our heroes to recover from their first fight in the Elven Tomb. How will they fare in their next fight? Find out next time on Buried Beneath, a D&D's for nerds adventure.

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