D&D is For Nerds - Jarren’s Outpost: EE #7 Warehouses

Episode Date: March 8, 2025

After many trials and tribulations our heroes finally reconvence and immediately start trying to kill each other. A riot in the midst of an assault on a Surefoot warehouse where blood cultist fights dwarf fights town guard fights Gregg Piss. Leo and Perri try to focus on what's important: pelting across rooftops avoiding arrows and spells whilst Gregg Piss gets reaquainted with his old bookie deep in the sewers of Jarren's Outpost.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Select games only. Guarantee void if platform or game outages occur. Guarantee requires played by at least one customer until jackpot is awarded or 11 p.m. Eastern. Research and supply. See full terms at canada.casino.fando.com. Please play responsibly. ACAS powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. If you enjoy detailed, fact-based and empathetic true crime storytelling, you might like Canadian true crime. I'm Christy Lee. Join me for an immersive deep dive into some of the most thought-provoking crimes in the

country I now call home. From the case of headley lead singer Jacob Hogart to the bizarre naked kidnappings in Alberta to infamous cases like Colonel Russell Williams. Go beyond the headlines and get the full story. Find Canadian true crime wherever you listen to podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com. Jarren's Outpost is a bustling city located in the nation of Goldcrest. A nation that nobody cared about until the king was slain by a bunch of adventurers.

Unfortunately, adventurers did what adventurers do, and they didn't think of the consequences of killing a powerful tyrant, and they promptly left the citizens of Goldcrest to figure it out for themselves. For now, Jaren's Outpost is a melting pot of religions, criminals, politics and paranoia, with everyone keeping everyone else in check. But all that's about to change. Welcome to the enhanced edition of Jaren's Outpost.

I'm going to check in with militia. They're going to drop you off nearby and then they're going to start their look. We should go check in with the captain. Let's go check in with militia. They're gonna drop you off nearby and then they're gonna start their look. We should go check in with the captain. Let's go check in with the captain. Say that we've got support of one of the Halfling families to help us find the sure-foots. Out the front you see Flip Shamrock. Flip Sham! Flip Sham! She's got a slightly worried expression on her face.

Her hair is done up in this tight little bun. She looks like she just came back from work. She's got soot on her face. Awesome. I go over, we hug, embrace. I'm like, I'm okay, you're okay, yay! Meat pie died. But I'm okay. What's this I'm hearing about you invading? Must have been invade and more of a like a breaking entry. Can we go somewhere quiet? Maybe somewhere we can have a quick chat.

Leo and Flip Shamrock walk off alone while also alone You walk into the militia barracks Yeah Any of the guys back from any of the other missions are any of the B team alive or a Thursday and Saturday awake? You don't see like it looks like the triage isn't here anymore. So I'm here by myself. Yep There's a bunch of guards around and you are respected among the town Yeah, and aid yes says like the commander wants to speak to you. You step in, Commander Tolton is looking out his window out at the town, facing away from

you. Sir? Have a seat. You sit down. You notice he still hasn't gotten his wounds healed. You're gonna get that checked, sir? I'm feeling a greater pain right now. What pain is that?

HE LAUGHS Why exactly have you come here? Come back to here? Yeah. You told me to come back and speak to you when you were ready, so I've come back to see if you're ready. No. Take after the Shelfordts and everything.

I didn't realise you were still a member of the Town Guard. Turns around. You... You... You see a look of disgust on his face. You just made me captain, like, half an hour ago. Yeah, I did. I've been down in Little Tegelike clearing rubble and wreckage off people who were down there.

Oh, excuse me. You've been in Little Tegelike, have you? Yeah, Leo's a halfling. You speak with the halfling families? Yeah, I want to know where the Shorefoots are. They've got my wife, remember, sir? And I stand up. You know, it's a little funny. Why would they have just kidnapped your wife? Usually like something like that, you know, you'd have to be deep in with the families, wouldn't you?

I'm deep in with any families. They kidnapped my wife. Whose wagon did you ride in here on? Why does that matter? Are you a mole? Are you a fucking rat? Sir, I don't know where this is going. Sir, before I answer your question, I need you to answer me one question. Has anyone come to see you today that isn't me? Well, now that you mention it, as a matter of fact, Greg Peirce stopped by and he had a couple interesting words for you.

Greg... Peirce? Yes. I don't know what you want from me sir. Tell you what I want from you. I want your badge. I want your sword and I want your resignation. Fine. A lot of people told me I was making a mistake hiring you. How long have you been working with the Halfling families? Sir, you know what I do. I get my hands dirty, which yeah, means sometimes I have to talk to people who aren't very good. If you're going to take Greg Piss' word over mine, then I don't want this fucking badge and you can take this captaincy and shove it up your

arse. He takes his in-tray and slides it towards you. I pick the in-tray up, snap it in half, put my badge on the desk, and just stare at it. Goodbye. Fuck you, sir. I have seen that there's something wrong with him, though. Yeah, there is something definitely like a little bit off,

but you didn't roll high enough to be like mind control. Yeah, I know that Greg Piss is coming and done something shifty, though. Possibly, yeah. I fuckled him somehow Got him drunk you leave can I can I go downstairs and see if I can try to get in contact with any of the Militia people who I who are loyal to me and know about what happened with this Saturday Thursday and Ian and then the BT

The BT are good friends though, you reckon if you ask that help you Yeah, can I get word to any of them that are still alive Thursday Saturday are pretty fucked up Thursday Ian. The BTNR are good friends though, you reckon if you asked they'd help you. Can I get word to any of them that are still alive? Thursday and Saturday are pretty fucked up. Ian's good. And Ian knows that he's K-Nose. I go to Ian. Ian has boarded up his house and is refusing to let people in or out. Well he's protecting my kids so that's fair. Thursday and Saturday are both at the

temple and are in no way to help you but Colin, Goggle, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday they're all like yeah the BT team survived. Go BT team. Colin you're a champion. They managed to they were like first on the wall and when things went to shit they fell back to a building nearby and just held out as everything happened around them. Heroes. So I go track them down and I just tell them that if they're coming with me to get my wife back, basically fill them in on everything that's happened and then I just explain that something's going on with the captain, he's commander, I've had to quit the militia, that if you're coming with me you are willingly breaking the law.

Goggle, the dwarf, steps up and says, to the end, brother. And he reaches out to that elbow. Oh, you! So they're all in? They're all in. Alright, we'll just do some scouting, see if you can find any information on the short foot, so we'll meet back up and we know what's going on from the Halflings.

They scatter. Leo, you and Flipchamp. Right. So... I could get drunk. Oh man, it's been a crazy couple of days. You have like a passionate moment first. Yeah. She hasn't seen you in a little while. It has been a while.

Oh yeah. We have a bit of a make out. It's one sexy halfling. Have a little make out session with Flipchamp. Boney. And then she interrupts it to be like, tell me what happened. Sorry, like this is basically, okay,

so you know how I work for the little low pop, a little like, you know, I'm the the little low pop a little like, you know I'm the grease going you know that old trouble. I maybe so um, quiet and eyes want me dead There's stabby, but also the short foot so the short foot have the weapon It's what kind you know tried to come and see you but like, you know Your boss Erky Timbers and kind of very not very first like you can't really get a dialogue with him. I found so Everyone seems to want the weapon has which is cool. We came close came close It's close to getting it. What are you gonna do with it? I'll destroy it

She like rolls her eyes a little bit and says why? Papa little I want to destroy because he's feeling that everything with this weapon is just ruining this town and Well, look, I mean I machine's worth a lot of money she says money but it'll kill a lot of people like what are the what are the gnomes gonna do with it what do you mean worth a lot of money she looks around all right I gotta get back to the gnomish quarter because I'm needed there I'm filming with some stuff here like what are you what are the gnomes planning to do with this I can't say anything because little oh I can try and talk a little low so maybe we come with an agreement and destroy it I don't know it might- Little O, I can try and talk to Little O so maybe we can come with an agreement and-

You gonna destroy it? I don't know. It might be out of my hands to do this, but if you give me some information, I can try and work with you. She seems to be on the edge of something. Look, you gotta promise me that you're either going to give it back to the Gnomes, give it back to us, my people, my company, or you're gonna destroy it. You gotta swear to me no one else can have it. Hey, all I want to ask was what are the numbs planning? I don't know. I don't have a window inside Erky Timbers is mine How willing is Erky Timbers to work and open up a dialogue with little low with little low probably not at all What about uh, what about one of the captain of the guards? Maybe one of the guards. Yes

Look, I'll promise you i'll try and destroy it oh you don't know i'm not a captain anymore do not you know a captain of the guard yeah uh half-orc is lovely guy i'm pulling a lot of strings to do this okay i'll try to get irky timbers to come down and talk to you fantastic uh and you know anything about maybe where the shore foots might. Fantastic. And you know anything about maybe where the Shorefoots might be? Look, we don't know anything about this city. We have no intelligence on the outside. Anything happening in the gnome quarters

that we need to know about or they might be able to help us out here? No, it's pretty quiet with us. Okay, I'll go. Oh, some were-rat was running about. Fucking a were-rat? Greg, please. How the fuck is this town? You know where I was going

to come back to buy me? We haven't caught it yet. Is it still running around? Yes. In the gnome centre? Yes. My lord. Well I'll try and destroy it. She puts her hands in her pockets and says I gotta go. Okay I'm sorry hun. She pecks you on the cheek and turns around. And as she's walking away she turns around one more time and says 6.30 tonight at the wall. Erky Timbers, your captain. Thanks, hon. Do I finally catch up to him now?

It took you a little while to do everything that you did, so Leo, you're probably like, I don't know, you're having a cigarette out the front, and then you meet up. Right. So, good news. OK, you first. OK, so, Flipcham's alive. That's good. Thank Christ. Uh... Oh, that's good. What's a Flipcham? My first. OK, so, Flipcham's alive. That's good. Thank Christ.

Uh... Oh, I was kidding. What's a Flipcham? Oh, my partner. OK. Yeah. Erky Timbers is happy to talk to you as the Captain of the Guard to maybe kind of, uh... Right. ..to, to... Cos, like... Gonna stop you there.

Cos we either destroy or give it a no. Just need to stop you there. OK. I learnt two things just now. Yes? First of all, Greg Pista's alive. Oh, yeah, we... Oh... Don't know how he got out, but he got out. He's been to speak to the commander, and I am no longer a captain in the guard.

We are now working outside the law. I quit the militia. Well, it's the militia. It's already, by definition, kind of working outside of law, yeah? Like... Well, now we're working already, by definition, kind of working outside of law, yeah? Like... Well, now we're working outside... outside the law. Eh, Phil. Outside the law that was established outside the law.

Outside? B-Team's alive. Hey, B-Team! They're still with us, but we no longer have the backing support of the commander, any of the TAN militia, and I'm no longer a captain. Okay, but we're working outside the law. Welcome to my territory. So you... Oh! Erky Timbers doesn't know you're not a captain. Okay, but we're working outside the law. Welcome to my territory. So you...

Erky Timbers doesn't know you're not a captain. I'm very bad at lying. You can just nod. Look, Flip Shamslee wants me... I made a promise. You know, promises to your partner, they mean something. Destroy the weapon or give it to the gnomes. We can discuss what happens with the weapon

once we work out what's going on with it. Would I know where the Shelford Strongholds would be, wouldn't I? Poor, you might have a passing knowledge? Depends. Oh, you got a decent knowledge. You know about the jewelry store and the clothing store. You know they operate out of both of those.

I think it's nice to have some other round possibility that if Greg Pierce is around, then he's done something, he's probably got some information, so he probably knows a few things. So our options are, well... And if he was coming here, he was coming here for the weapon, which means when the weapon wasn't there, he would have known that, well...

The sure-foot's out of the way. Potentially. We're both up to speed. Yeah. Our plan should be we wait for the littleos to come back, or we could go investigate the sure-foot strongholds ourselves. Greg Pierce, you're on your way to the Gnomish section? Pre-considered. I might drop down into the sewers, find that blood top. Just remind me, because it's been a while,

did they give me an ultimatum that if I don't come back with the weapon they'll kill me? They didn't really give you that ultimatum but you feel like you need your soul. That, yeah no, no I figured. I'm gonna certainly hop into the sewers. You're wandering around for ages fruitlessly until finally someone calls out, brother you have returned! This is a man you know as Skip Tarkenton. I don't know if you've seen him in the cult before. Yeah. But you know he's like a big power player in the merchants around town. Cool. I turn around. Indeed I have.

Have you come to speak to the Allfather? I have news on the location of the weapon. But between you and me, how's he feeling? How's he doing? Is he in a mood? Excuse me? Is the Allfather, is he, you know? Is the Allfather in a mood? He's jubilant as we all are. Right, yeah.

Blood has been spilled this night. It's been good. It's been good. Out of hand in that, out of hand in that. We figured you might. Please, come with me. I run him through with my saber. It's a rapier, first off. Rapier, rapier, rapier, rapier. Sorry, I got sabres on the brain. Watching Jackson play this is so entertaining.

Uh, yeah, he's dead. You, uh, skewer him, like, between the eyes. OK, I'd like to take... I'm assuming he's in a robe of some variety. A blood red robe, yeah. Sweet. I'd like to grab that. Uh huh. And then I'd like to hide the body as best I can. I know that's probably...

You roll it into the water. Rodeo, sweet. Now... Do bodies sink or float? Depends on the time. Float, I think. When they're fresh kills. Float.

Float for the hair. Do you think float? Yeah. Well, he starts sailing down. Right. Now I'm gonna keep trying to find the blood cult. Wasn't he gonna take you to the blood cult? Yes, but see, here's the rub.

Um, the Blood Cult presumably are gonna be pretty mad that I've been like, well, look, hey, I was meant to get the weapon, but I've just fucked around for ages. But if I turn up looking like this cunt, nobody's gonna suspect a thing. Oh, my God. OK. HE LAUGHS

Uh, it takes you several hours. You spend a lot of time working. It's a big city. But you do actually find it. It takes you like five, six hours. Whatever it takes. But you find this like, not a door, but a patch of the wall has this like skull carved into it. This weeping red liquid that you're pretty sure is blood.

And this place does look familiar Okay, I'd like to like rub my hands over it see if I can find like a secret latch or whatever You're able to find a seam in the wall. There's definitely a door here, but you're not sure how to open it You're standing here for a little while. You notice like on the door. There's like old blood I caught my finger bleed onto it. Good job. Yeah like old blood. I cut my finger bleed onto it. Good job. Yeah. The door opens. And then Alter Self. They'll look like, let's keep talking to them. You wander in. There's like a lot of people here in black, blue and red robes. You think the robes signify something, but you're not sure what. They're moving about chanting. It's a sort of a chapel. There's

doors off to the sides. Brothers! I yell. I know of the location of the weapon. I have killed the Cad Greg Piss and discovered its location. I like to imagine that Greg Piss would, like, talk himself up. A brilliant... Brilliant, gorgeous... Sly, devious, very handsome, big cocked Greg Piss. I don't say kill. I say I have, like with, because if I say kill they're going to be

like boy. They throw up their arms and start chanting blood, blood, blood, blood, blood, blood, blood, blood. Pushing past them, Father Ralph Moroney, the leader of the blood cult. He approaches you and he says, Brother, lead us! Unfortunately, I know its location, but not how to get there. The gnomes have it in a stronghold in the sewers here with us. Then summon Piss.

I do not know where he's got his slippery as an eel, Father...or Father. Slippery as an eel? The slippery as a big cocked eel? LAUGHTER The sipper is a big cocktail. I'm just... That's exactly how it would go down too. Father Moroni gives you a weird look. And he says... Very well then.

Brothers, sisters, please come. Fetch me the vessel. Someone brings along this like jar. Within the jar is this white wisp. You feel a weird affinity with the white wisp. Oh, no! Dear me! Father Maroney grabs it and he says,

You spoke with piss, did you? Yes. Indeed I did. Well, he can't have gone far, surely. He shakes the container. You feel just sick at your stomach. I try to keep, like, without flinching. Just no change in my face.

Father Moroni looks you dead in the eyes and you know you're not fooling him. He's just like slowly moving it about and as he moves it you feel really bad. He jerks it once. You clutch at your chest and double over screaming out in pain. Uhhh, bruises up. They're all standing around you, reveal yourself. I'll tap my chest, be Greg Fisk again.

Child of sin. What have you done with brother? I spilled blood for you, that's good right? Spilled blood? There is no use to spilling blood when a willing supplicant would spill more as they aged. Right, yeah, of course, my bad. Light the fire. You had this great plan, but it's stupid, so now you're punished.

But it's a 50-50 split every time. I feel like it's like a 60-40 split. You're 70-30 to be honest. At best. Yeah. If your soul, your deep centre, is not enough to convince you to sacrifice for our cult, perhaps we shall take from the outside in instead. I'll bleed for you.

No, no, no, no. The cultists hold you down as they light a big sacrificial kind of looking flame. You know in Indiana Jones they get attached into that metal cage thing? One of those is lowered down and you get put into that. Are they going to rip his heart out while it's still beating? Let us sacrifice the supplicant's flesh! How many exits are there for this room? Three. OK, how close are we out of them?

The one that you came through, the entryway, you're pretty close. I'd like to blink for that exit and be like, catch me if you can. You're out before they can react. And I'm going to try and run. I've got no clue where... Can you blink many times while you have that web? I have three a day up limited. On the map I saw the location of the Gnomish stronghold, yeah?

Yeah, yeah. Okay, I'm gonna run for that. And my intention is to lead the blood cult to the Gnomish. Hey! It's a lichy pouch. Navigating the sewers to get there is gonna be quite a task. Yeah, I figured. But like, it's either that or lose my skin, so.

Yeah. Oh, should've taken that map that would have been clever. Well fuck me. Greg Pierce, King of the Lamb. I kind of want Greg Pierce to win this. You find the path that only the Blood Cult or the Shorefoots should have been able to show you. You're not sure exactly where you are but you know you are under the Gnomish section. Okay, and I want to try and keep making sure that the blood cult is following me. They are definitely chasing after you. Excellent news. Excellent. You know what's in the gnomish section though?

Shane. He'll get killed in the fray. Meanwhile. Yes. Hey, has that runner come back from the sure-foots yet? He probably has, but he hasn't come to find you. That's alright. Presumably they didn't send to find you. That's alright.

Presumably they didn't send the message back. No. Although apparently I know where they live. Because the guy said to me, you know where we are. Yeah, as a beat guard, if you will. You did know about the jewellery store and the clothes shop. I'm getting sick of waiting. Nah, fair.

I'll get a messenger to be like, don't worry about 6.30, destroy all yours, I promise. And that'll be my message to Flipchand. Okay. So here's the plan. While Little Low is going around, we get my boys together. I think the jewellery store is probably the better place to have because it's a jewellery store. So there's the weapons combination sound mix. So we rally my new team, the C team. and we just go there and we do our own investigation. Because otherwise we're just twiddling our thumbs all Little O does of course. When you collect the C team, I'm gonna say Tuesday. Ah, he's hated that guy.

I'm still allowed to dislike him on a fundamental... he's a little bit racist. He's like, he has you so that he can say he has an orc friend. Yeah, I go to his party as his token orc friend. It's the kind of thing like if you're at a party and there's like an orc lady, he'll be like, hey, she's alright. And you're like, why don't you say that for any of the other races? And he makes like orc jokes at me and I'm like, you can't say those. You're not allowed to say that.

How you going, my orc? What's up, blood brother? No, no, no, no. Not okay, man, not okay. Maybe tribe brother? Cause you half and half? Cause you tough? You're not allowed to say that. Are you going, Mo'o? What's up, Blood Brother? No, no, no, no. Not okay, man, not okay. Maybe Tribe Brother? Cause me half and half? Cause you tough?

Like, that's our word. You can't do that. Anyway, he comes back and he says, hey, I managed to spy on the commander's little fact sheet. I think he wants to get into the Shorefoot warehouse in the Gnomish district. Well then fuck the juror still we're going to the how do we get there? I don't know getting in is gonna be quite a like an ordeal. No, I'm not letting anyone in. All right messenger boy. Come back Give me that message. Just tear that message up. All right I can't recall the message but like if you do show up at 630

There will be a guard there regardless at the gate, and you can just say, Flipp-Sam, please come to the gate. Sure. I'm with you. My word. The town militia are with me. Do we want to get a message to Little-O and see if he can find a way to get into the Sure-Foot's warehouse that isn't through the front door? Sure.

Alright. We do that too. Getting a bit salty? Nah, like I'm like, I'm in so much trouble now, like with Flip-Sham. She's gonna be mad at me. She's gonna be a bit mad at you. There's gonna be anger sex. Yeah.

Hey, anger sex is so much. You don't like anger sex that much. Flip-Sham punches you sometimes. Don't keep punching, Leo. Is that the one where it's in the back of the head? Yeah, don't keep punching. Your sex is weird and you're both little so it's strange. I don't want to imagine why she's behind you as well.

Leo? I do. Yeah a lot of pegging. He's fine. Halflings love pegging. Like a gnomish steam pal in your car. Yeah. Yeah.

Um, nah Leo's all for butt play. Get on him. Bang. And object. Disregard. Last message. Still the promise is fine. Meet you at 6. I guess if the first message made it, surely the second one will. Exactly. Anyway, you have to wait a couple hours

for 6.30 to roll around. What do you guys want to do with it? Do we reconvene in the middle? Actually, you don't want to grab the littleos. Yeah, team up and see if they know of another way in that's not in front of them. Team up with the littleos and be like like this is where we think they're going he's like get another meeting with Papa little oh he's like carriage pulls off he gets out he's dressed for battle right now he's got this really old looking leather armor he's got like a light crossbow slunger of his shoulder and the rapey right his hip he walks up to you guys I was this about you wanting

to get into the the normal sex I have you wanting to get into the, the, the gnomish section? Underneath. They have a tunnel to get in there. Yeah. So we believe that's where it is. Where's the tunnel? I don't know. If we knew, we would be using the tunnel ourselves.

The gnomes and we, we don't say eye to eye on a lot of things. We steal from them. They, you know, get stole from. Hahaha. Yep. I do not like them. They do not like us. For good reason. Fair, fair. So, Littler, there's no way we could kind of have a sit-down meeting with Erky Timbers, yeah? I will not deal with this man.

Right. I feel like you two are my children now, but... I hate Erky Timbers that much. Does Erky Timbers... ...erky you, Little O? He does a bit, yeah. That's some good wordplay. You're probably my smartest kid, if you are a kid.

Do you want to kind of like, is there any kind of faction that we can kind of work with, Little O? Is that, even if we don't destroy it, maybe they have it and that kind of thing? You know what I mean? Possibly the Town Guard. I don't like the, maybe they have it and that kind of thing. You know what I mean. Possibly the town guard. I don't like the idea of the town guard getting it. Sabres are nut jobs. The church? The church would destroy it.

That's a good idea. So he'd say, let alone be open to the town guard keeping it? I don't like the idea. It's the best of a bad situation if they get. Right. I made a promise to Periwinkle. The church would destroy it, I assume. I would love to destroy it on your behalf, but it's really Periwinkle's call. Why do you want to keep such an awful thing?

It's not about keeping it. It's about keeping it away from people who might want to use it. But we have a chance. We break this thing, maybe it never comes back. Little- back little oh you're too smart you've been around too long to not think that the gnomes would just build a new weapon if anyone keeps this weapon then should be us if I destroy the sure-for-its then I can decide what happens to the weapon well I don't think I'll be in a position to stop you. But I trust you. You saved my Rosita. You bring her back to me.

Your family now. Come here. Kneel down. Boom. He kisses you on both cheeks. You do this for me. You break this weapon. I make you both mad men.

Oh, mad men. You want to make the machine, I make you. I'm going to go make the machine I make you I'm gonna go We need to rebuild little teagall I but if you need men I give you what I can But can't give you a lot. There's a not a little tough war erupting right now. I need to go It's the word kill a lot of fucking short books. Oh Yes, can I come? What's the word? Kill a lot of fucking sure-fucks. Oh yeah. Can I come? No.

If we find your wife and my man, they'll keep her safe. Good. You find my wife and potentially Papa Sure-Foot or the people keeping her? Can you keep them safe and alive too? He smiles. I keep him for you. Thank you. Okay. Now the fuck do we do Leo?

Well now we've got to meet up with the e-timbers and flip sham at 6.30. Alright, let's go. Let's go. You're taking the C team with you as well? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You alright? There are like guards lining up on the massive walls to this section of the city. Slowly the gates open, just a fraction, like wide enough for three abreast

gnomish soldiers to stream out. You didn't know the gnomes had soldiers in here. If this was still the nation of Goldcrest, this would basically be an act of war. They start arranging themselves. There's like two sets of three come out. You know, they have weapons with them. They're not aiming them at you or have them drawn or anything like that, but they have them at the ready. If this goes bad, get behind me. I reckon I could punch through eight of them at once. So punch the gnomes. The gnomes are good peeps.

Erky Timbers walks out. Oh, jeez. Hello there. I was told you wanted to talk to me. Again. Hi Erky, yeah. Remember me. Anywho, uh, do you know of the Shawfoots? The Shawfoots? Yeah, I'm aware of the Hawthorn family. Do you know that they have a warehouse in your district? We do, yeah.

They've got his wife and they're keeping a hostage there and we would like to get into the Gnomish thing. With a popping sound. You can see just through the gap in the fence, a sewer grate leaps off into the middle of the street and out of the sewer grate climbs your good friend Greg Pierce. Mother of... Back down! Can I give him a fucking intimidate stare?

You can, I'm not gonna roll for it. Just know that my eyes are saying if I get my hands on you I'm gonna choke you with your intestines. You look down, Greg Pierce, and there's a blood cultist climbing this ladder up to you. Blink! Which direction? FanDuel Casino's exclusive LiveDealer studio has your chance at the number one feeling, winning. Which beats even the 27th best feeling, saying I do. Who wants this last parachute?

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Please play responsibly. ACAS powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. We call them cliques at your world tonight. It's the little word we use when someone from our team reads over and approves a story. Each one gets carefully checked and clicked more than once to make sure you always get the facts. I'm Susan Bonner. I'm Tom Harrington. And I'm Stephanie Scanderis.

Together, we bring you the day's news and help you understand it with a process you can trust. Your World Tonight from CBC News. Find and follow us wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com Into the Gnomish district. Alright, with a pop, Greg Pierce is gone.

With another pop, he reappears running down a street. Right, Erky Timbers, can you see that man over there? We really need to get him. Erky Timbers is just kind of like dumbfoundedly staring. So is it OK? That man...that man is a fugitive of the lore. Men in black and purple and red and blue robes start climbing their way out and they engage with the gnomes nearby who engage back.

A chaos erupts. We run past the gnomes. We run after Greg Piss. You get clear? OhEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E the seat team behind you is a odd assortment of blood cultists and gnomes fighting each other as the blood cultists try to get to greg piss and the gnomes try to get to you guys instead of drop some keltrops that i stole of greg piss all right you hamper some of them like some screaming occurs behind you and keep running oh wait grease the floor you grease the floor as well how far is greg piss um he's pretty far ahead of you guys can I custom visibility on myself Clarence you can but you start

falling back I'll cop it with a wink Greg Pierce disappears sheet and I'd like to then try and climb on to a roof somewhere wait a second it's a I'm gonna use that spell of seeing things that scroll the truth thing true thing. Yeah You can see Greg Pierce fucking there's that piece of shit Greg pierces all he's on the roof at this point I'm on the roof He can probably only be invisible for maybe 10 seconds at a time. I jump up under the roof All right. Hang on wait, cuz you guys have sort of slowed down so it's starting to... The cacophony is starting to catch up to you.

Is there an option for me to throw you at him? There always is! There always is. Adam, I don't know if we've done this, but he always makes us write our weight at the start of each campaign because he inevitably concludes that one of us is gonna throw another one yeah true side only you can see oh he's on the roof yes you are first fuck you are bullshit well you're up on the roof you can see all around you the buildings some are higher some are lower but most are about the same height did I hear over here Leo saying he's on the roof over the commotion there's a full like a riot going on between the cultists and the gnomes.

Alright I'll just keep running. And me roaring. I might try and get to higher ground though if there are any higher buildings. You leap to a nearby building, fail to find purchase on the opposite building and slowly just fly scrambling down the side of the building. You take no damage but you're on the floor. I don't have a chance for a punch sliding down to just smash through a window or whatever? Uh, no you don't.

That's fair. There's a warehouse now in between you and the others. Yep. Leo, you lost sight of him because there was a warehouse in between you two and you don't know that he's fallen. You just know that you last saw him on top of this warehouse. Is he telling you he's going that way? I'm going to run after him and climb up on the roof and jump on him. With two powerful hoists you've pretty much thrown yourself onto the roof.

I should have thrown you up with me. You have a quick look around, you can't see him anywhere, but that's not unusual. He is invisible. Yeah, no, true. Oh, no, I can't. Fuck it. Fuck, I should have thrown Leo up there. As I've done this, I just want to take a precaution.

I'm going to take the loot out. Uh-huh. I'm just going to rip all the strings off. So now it's just a club. So even if I lose the loot and you get it back, you can't do any of your bard shit. I put the loot back. You do it. Alright. Clever. Can I climb up the roof?

You can climb up, yeah. Alright. You're up with Periwinkle. Yeah, you spot the top of Greg Piss' head in the street. The mob begins to slowly surround this building. The riot and combat washes up against the part of the building that you guys climbed up and is slowly like a river wrapping around the building. Is there anywhere that I could run to like smash through a window or get into someone's house? You're in between two warehouses, highs or lows. There's a door on this side of the warehouse that you could get into,

into this double story warehouse. You could smash a couple windows as well, but that might cause you some difficulty. Yeah, righty-o. Uh, fuck it, I'll go through the door. Alright. The door is locked. Damn. You could try kicking it down, it looks kind of flimsy.

Yeah, I'll give it a go, why not? With a solid crunching sound, you kick the door and it breaks off its hinges. Sweet. Inside is a, well it's a warehouse. It's a lot of boxes and there's a catwalk going above them all. There's no light here as well. This isn't THE warehouse, is it? No, this is just A warehouse.

You guys are like a block away from where the sure-foots have their stash. Can I hide in the boxes and ready in action? How does that work? In a box or among the I hide in the boxes and ready in action? How does that work? In a box or among the boxes? Among the box. Alright, so you'd have to wait for your next turn because you've got to like find a place, you've got to maybe move some shit around you,

that sort of stuff. Are there any windows on the other side? Yeah, there's windows all around. I'm going to head to the other side. Alright, you just start charging through the warehouse. Sure. Periwinkle, it's your turn. Leo points him out.

Yeah, that he's ran into the building. Actually, you see the warehouse. Cool. Periwinkle, it's your turn. Leo points him out. Dickhead foul. Yeah, that he's ran into the building. He's ran into the building. Actually, you see the door break open. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we've seen him. Alright, here's the thing. He's trapped in the warehouse surrounded by people that probably want to kill him and

we're on a rooftop. Can we see the warehouse we're going for? Yeah, do we know where the warehouse would be that the show up was? Oh yeah, you have a rough idea, yeah. Oh, also, do we have the C team with us? I think the C team are with us. They're kind of in among the mob. Alright. They might be able to make it to you guys if you call out where you're going, but

if you call out where you're going, the mob is gonna know. What if I call out to the guys and tell them to get great piss? You see, it's quite great pisses in that building. As I said to you in this really good plan I wrote down, fuck great piss, let's go for the weapon. Good idea. Cause you're in trouble, conceivably get there via rooftop so you don't have to jump

back down where the fray is. Yeah, you might have to take an odd path though because not all the time will you be able to take a direct route from the rooftop. Let's do that. We're gonna make a beeline for the warehouse. And as we run away we just call out to the freight. Greg Piss is in the warehouse!

Periwinkle you leap from one warehouse to the one that Piss is on? Oh fuck, I should have grabbed him as I did that. Can I carry him while I'm doing this? Pretty strong. He's pretty heavy. I'm alright at climbing. Alright then, I was just gonna save time but obviously yeah, but like I can also you know If we have like our ropes and stuff. Oh you've got grappling hooks on the ropes so you can use them

You can do that, but it makes you a lot slower because you got to throw a rope then you got to attach it stuff like that Yeah, but whenever if somebody falls that's your plan Yeah, and also like some place some I can jump some I cannot so basically I'll be reading my grappling hook But if I can jump it I'll jump. So basically I'll be readying my grappling hook, but if I can jump it, I'll jump it. You're both across to the warehouse. You're on the warehouse that Greg pierces in. Right. Pierce, you hear like, pfft, pfft, pfft, pfft,

something stomping on the roof. We keep running, so. Then every window on the south side of this warehouse, the one that was close to where you came in from, breaks open and people start either climbing or falling in. And they just randos from the... Gnomes and cultists. I blink onto the catwalk? Or like blink out, run up to the catwalk?

Yeah, OK. Or climb a ladder, whatever's next. You're up on the catwalk, blinking around? You're invisible, remember? Yeah. I know, but like, I didn't want to have to deal with I can't see you Yeah, but there's like a white blink up there. It's like what if I have to walk through them They get attacks of all upon me eyes. Not if you're invisible. They can't see you you know see you don't need a but They're still behind you. Oh, right. Okay. Well, I'll get up in the capital you get up

Gosh, you get up on the cat. That was exhausting You're moving around up on the cat walk. Oh cool exhausting. I think I ached a week. You're moving around up on the catwalk. Cool. Can I get out of any windows for me? There are windows that extend up here, but it's a bit of a fall. If I blinked down, would I be fine? It's not really a teleportation, more that you're moving through two planes of existence. Yeah, so I still cop the damage when I'm down.

It's more like- You'd just be falling in the spooky ghost world. Imagine it more like Shadow Cat than, um, fuckin'... Nightcrawler? Nightcrawler. Don't be mad, but I get off the cow hook. Okay. I'd like to, um, exit the warehouse and look for Aesir.

Great. Alright, to exit the other side of the warehouse, it's either a door or jumping through a window. Obviously it's not as much a fall now that you're not on the catwalk, but you might still take some damage leaping out a window. I'll leap out through a window.

I hope you take a little fucking damage, boy. Dramatic failure. You missed the window. Hahahaha! You just throw yourself into a wall. Right side, you don't take down. Oh, that's good. But you're still in the warehouse.

Periwinkle and Leo? We just keep going. We keep going towards the... The short for the warehouse. Periwinkle, you jump to the next building, but Leo, you do not make the jump. As you're leaping, you immediately are aware that you don't have enough room.

And I throw my grappling hook that I readied. Woopie! He's so angry! I did say that... That's not how actions work. Whatever, you get the rope, but the sudden jerking motion doesn't break your arms, but you have to let go of the rope and you start falling.

You try to grab the rope again... Can I try and grab him without going off the rope? You're falling. You're on the other side. Oh, shit, yeah, I'm ages away. I'll just keep scoping. At least we're clear of the bad guys. So, options.

You either just fall, or you fall but slow your descent with the rope, potential rope that burns. Which would you prefer? I think it's the difference between cut skin on your palms and a broken leg. Cut skin on my palm? Let's go with that. Alright. like cut skin on your palms into broken legs. Cut skin on my palms, go with that. All right, so you still impact quite speedily to the ground, but not as speedily as if you hadn't have grabbed the rope.

So Leo, you're on the floor now, Periwinkle, you are still moving from roof to roof. Yep, absolutely. You guys glanced at each other briefly, what's the plan, keep going like this? I'm saying, I'll meet you there. All right, I keep going. All right.

The mob starts spilling through the warehouse. Piers, because no one can see you, the fight is just happening around you. I feel like it's been longer than ten seconds. Piers, it's your turn. Can I try and get through a window again? You sure can, mate. I love that you failed, that's so good. Windows are just stronger than you thought.

I'll try the door. It's locked. I'll go through the old door. That's fine. You go back the way you came. Go on the catwalk again. Alright, that'll be your next. Yep, that's fair. Uh, Periwinkle and Leo.

Periwinkle, you jump. You make it to the next building. Cool. Am I close? You're two jumps away. Alright, good. Sick. Cool, cool. Leo... Yeah, we're gonna keep running. Yep. The mob is getting very close to you. You hear a bunch of gnomes call out, and I assume ignore them.

Yes. Three stray attacks get quite close to you. Hmm. A magical bolt of energy whistles past your ear, an actual physical bolt from a crossbow hits the ground in front of you and an axe hits a wall next to you. But you just keep going. Callback Rune! Any update on our boys, the new team? You can't see them in the mob. You're not really looking back though. Greg Pierce, you barrel through the warehouse. Two large boxes are on either side of you.

You see a gnome fall off one of the boxes, slam into the ground in front of you. You leap over the gnome. And as you leap over the gnome, whipping her out from around behind the box is Monday with a club in hand. He socks you slowly in the face. Monday's good. And you flip end over end. I just want to point out to my notes about the new team. Colin

is a good guy, Goggles is a dwarf. Monday I have no information next to you. Tuesday is a racist. You see Wednesday with a light crossbow lying like a sniper style on top of a bunch of boxes. He fires the light crossbow at you. Sharp shooter that Wednesday. As you're getting to your feet, the impact, the solid impact in your upper sternum from the crossbow ball knocks you back onto the gnome. I can never get relieved that you're in trouble because I just have seen you escape so many times. Yes, it's your turn. Major image? Everything's on fire. So the way major image works is everyone is going to get a will saving throw immediately because

they think everything's on fire. Even if they fail the save and see fire everywhere, they're not going to feel fire. Yeah, right. Well, isn't there... Well, actually... I think they do with major image. Yeah, actually, no. I think it does damage. No, you can make them think it's actual fire. They don't take damage, but they believe it's real fire. Oh, good.

And then I'd like to start from... Try and stop a past if I can. So, Monday, you see him try to pat out his arm at first, but immediately he's like, wait a minute. He looks down at the arm where he thinks fire is happening, then up at you chanting a spell, and he's like, you're a fucking fool like me. Wednesday, up on the boxes however, starts screaming and trying to put himself out. Ah, silly Wednesday. Everyone around you, whether they be blood cultists or gnomes, starts screaming.

That's good for us. Good for us. I'll enjoy the commotion. And can I try and run past on this turn? Well, you can get up and run past, but that's an attack of art from Monday. I'll pop it. He swings again with his club. He hits you again.

That's fine. Perilinkle, you jump. I jump again. You jump, and when you land, you land not on the tiles, but on the guttering next to the tiles. The guttering crumples immediately inwards and you have to scramble on tiles but you drag yourself up onto the next roof. Good. One jump away.

Leo, you keep moving. The mob is still slowly encroaching on you and you're gonna take another two stray shots go your way. A magical bolt, another one, misses you and so does another axe. I'm not sure where the axes are coming from. Why are they throwing axes at me? That's goggles, he actually can't see very well. That's why we call him goggles in this class. You can try to hide now if you want. Alright so my options would be I could climb, hide or keep running yeah? Yeah. How far away am I from the warehouse? A bit. You're a lot further than Perilinkle is.

I'm gonna climb. Why is Iroq? I'm like two warehouses ahead, three warehouses ahead now. Yeah. So you're halfway up the building, you try to grab at a... You try to grab at some of the, like, you know, the pipe guttering? Try to grab at that. But then a shadow jumps over you

and the guttering warps before you can grab it. Oh, I'm so sorry. Dim! Could be another giant half-orc leaping from rooftop to rooftop. I like that the timing-wise, though, like, I jump, land, survive, and then we flash back, and that fucks you up.

Like, oh, this is good, this is good, I'm gonna flash back, and that fucks you up. Oh, this is good, this is good, I'm gonna, oh. It's the butterfly thing. Shit. Yeah, so you don't fall, but you lose your handhold, and now you're just halfway up the building, and that's where you're going to go. Cool, is there like a window near me?

Yeah, there's a window near you, but to scramble through it would be your next step. All right, cool. Piers, none of the mobs seem to be seeing through your roost still. So you've got a large area of distraction where you can just charge through. Cool. However, Wednesday comes up behind you. Monday.

Monday comes up behind you. Wednesday's on fire in the royal office. Yeah, I'm a champ. Monday grabs you by the back of your shirt and drags you towards him. You turn around, maybe to say something or to let loose a spell, something, anything like that. But before you can do anything, his club clocks you in the face, knocking half of your teeth into your mouth. Normal damage, one con damage, so your constitution has been reduced again you lose any bite attacks you might have

oh no you'll go through you gain a 20% spell failure chance on verbal spells how many of your spells require you to say something? presumably all you've been through worse yeah I was on nothing in a cell locked up losing my teeth what awesome do I speak like this now? Yeah, all right if me Greg piff Pierce it's your turn. Okay. So couple questions is my my exit to the of the warehouse still blocked by Monday Yeah, no, I'm a front of Monday. Yeah was behind you cool. I'd like to run through the door

confusion on Monday and then slam the door. OK. That'll be my turn. You manage to get the spell off, and you throw your mental weave, your mental net, at Monday. You feel it wrap around his brain, but then he shakes it off. Ah, piece of shit. Periwinkle, you jump to the next building. Jump to the next building.

You, uh, jump, and as you jump you slip off a tile, tumble into the street, you take a lot of damage. Yeah seven points of damage when you hit the floor on your back. Still fairly tanky. Yeah you're doing fine. Am I now in front of the warehouse that we're going to though because it was the last warehouse I had to get to. This is the warehouse. I'm now in front of the warehouse, I'm just on the ground. Yep. Great, are there any sure-foots around? It would be so unlikely, like they're not allowed in this area.

I could be hiding. You certainly don't see any sure-foots. Right. Leo? I will go through that window. It opens. You slip in, you're on a catwalk, like from that first warehouse. Cool, run to the other side. You get to the other end, There's a window, but it's not like an openable window.

You can see Periwinkle out on the street. Can I go down stairs? Not on this turn. But is there like a ladder to go downstairs? Yeah, there's stairs going down, but there's more windows that can't be opened. It's all on this side, windows that can't be opened. That's alright. You can get to the bottom level, but you'd have to smash a window. Yeah I figured. Alright that was Leo,

the mob. They continue to just mob I suppose. Still on fire? Cooking them. Incorrect. That's okay I'm out of their house. The gnomes who get an inherent bonus on detecting illusion spells immediately begin to see through this after one of them is like, wait a minute. And when the gnomes stop acting like they're on fire, the blood cultists are like, maybe there isn't something to this whole fire thing. That's good.

I can imagine Wednesday, though, just thinks he's still on fire. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so someone tries to open the door, Piers. Do you want to try and hold it closed? Oh, yeah sure, I'll try and hold it closed. Are you visible? Yeah, I assume so. If you didn't turn on invisible once the spell happened or you were hit, you turned invisible.

The door is wrenched open and Monday standing on the other side. Kira! I'm promoting the shit out of this guy if he survives. He swings at you with the club, but you slam the door on his attack, and his arm is like in the doorway. I'll cast Invisibility again. You can take a step back, cast Invisibility, that's your turn. I'll step back, cast it.

Okay. Yeah, that's your turn then. You're invisible again. Sweet. Without your front teeth, you're still able to say the spell. Invisibility. Invisibility. Invisibility. Why?

I like that all of my spells are just saying the name of the spell. Why? Major image. Confusion. I like how with the broken teeth, you start to become more like Michael Caine. Yeah. Poof. She was finally 19. 18? How old were you? 17. She was only 19. 19, that was pretty interesting. Muff the Booth. M Yeah. Boof. She was finally 19. 18? How old were you at 17?

He was only 19. 19, that was right. Martha Booth. Martha Booth. A tangerine, big as a tangerine. Bigger than tangerine. Yes? Very welcome.

There's no door on this side, there's no windows on this side. Just painted though, is a symbol of the company that the Shorefoots own. Uh, how far away are you? I'm behind you, like literally behind you. I probably see you through a window.

If you turned around you might see me. You went around, you do see Leo in an upper story window, but you can't like get up there. Leo waves, you wave. Hey, Leo. I'm gonna get in the warehouse. Give him the thumbs up there soon. You got up, you got down.

What? It's exactly what happened. One of you. You got up, you got down. What? One of you like points up, one of you points down. So I'm gonna try to get in the warehouse obviously. You run around to one of the sides. This side also has no entrances. You think you're around the back of the building now. Leo, you charge down the stairs. You're at the bottom level. You want to try and smash a window? Oh is any of them, can I, is there any that are open? Do I know? No, it's all, it's all unopenable windows, just like a glass thing. Then you smash one open and clamp it through.

You smash the window but hurt yourself. Hey good, good reference. You deal four points of damage to yourself. That's good. Four points of damage to yourself. That's good. Pierce. You shut the door in Monday's face, took a step back,

cast invisibility, you're invisible, and in the distance you hear ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Where creatures how? I'm gonna be more like... Whoooo! Whoooo! That's infinitely more disturbing. You turn around, on the roof of the building behind you, you can see the familiar silhouette of a certain were-rat. Um... Bop, bop, bop, bop.

Bum, ba-dum. I'm invisible, yeah? Don't you about to launch into the Seinfeld theme? Bum, bum, bum, bum. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, yeah. Don't you about to launch into the Seinfeld theme? I'm invisible. We're rats, right? I mean, who are they trying to keep out of there? They keep trying to find a manhole. That's my plan. That's my plan hole.

Find a manhole. You scan the street and find a manhole cover. I'm going to slide on down. You can't lift it. Can I use my saber for leverage? Not saber, rapier. Rapier. Also probably not good for leverage. Do you want to? I'll give it a go. You bend the rapier and make it unusable as a weapon. That's fine, I can still blink with it, yeah? Yes. Yeah, that's fine. Oh no, you've got one more blink today, because

we had that long conversation. Wait, does that let me phase through things? Yes. I'll just blink down. You're in the sewers, sweet. Man, I hope that were-rat can smell you. Me too. Uh, periwinkle? I think it can.

Um, you keep charging, you go back the other way around. You pass Leo on your way. Holding my arm up, blood. Keep going. Thumb up, wrapping a fucking bandage around. The only entrance you're able to see are a massive set of heavy wooden doors. There's a big old chain around them and a big brass lock. I knew someone who was good at picking locks. Earlier you slowly amble through the hole you made in the window and gingerly walk after

a pair of winklops. You get to the front of the warehouse as well. Cool. You're gonna open that lock? I'll do my bestest. The mob are like right behind you guys. How did they catch up to us so quickly? You guys have been faffing for a little bit. Yeah, that looked fair. You were running around a building. I thought they were stuck in a warehouse all on fire.

You can try and break them. Nah, it's kind of like a full-blown riot slowly spiraling out. Does the lock on chain look like I could rip it apart with my hands? You can certainly try. Well, you can try it. That doesn't work. I'll pick it. Alright, I'm gonna try to rip the lock open before it has a crack at picking it. That'll be right off the pierce, does some stuff in the sewers. Sweet, sewer pierce. It's me? Yep. You just try to navigate your way towards the thing, right? I try to navigate my way towards the blood cult sanctuary. I'm getting my soul back.

Smart, smart, actually. Whatever. I like how I'm gonna be able to fight you guys for the weapon in the warehouse. Better you get the weapon and then I deal with that later. Time to get my soul. all you can hear is like of you running it through the sewer and the distant sounds of like like combat and yelling and the riot then you're like calm reverie is broken by the sound of metal being torn off its hinges, something big landing in water and a voice. Little ring, little pig.

You're not a wolf. LAUGHTER Is there anything sadder than a wolf? Fuck, a were-rat that wishes it was a were-wolf. Is there anything sadder than a were-rat that wishes it was a were-wolf? Is there anything sadder than a were-rat wishing it was a were-wolf? My god. Especially one named Shane. Do you say that by the way?

Yeah. You're not a wolf! It's running towards you. That's fine. I felt like I was going to have to fight him at some point anyway. Alright, Periwinkle, you try to rip the lock open. Bad news is you failed to break the chain. The good news is with your Herculean effort,

you instead just break the door. Ah! Ah! Oh, nevermind. Just hold up bit of door, throw it away. You can push the doors inwards now if you want. Is there an opening that I could see through? You can push it enough so that you can try to gaze through. Both you and Leo try to

look through to see beyond. The place is dark. I've got dark vision remember. Yeah, so I was about to. I literally said the butt. But I thought it was when you say butt it often means butt you're now on fire. But you go to look, but splinters gouge out both your eyes now. It's funny you should say that you came out on fire. Because literally what I was going to say was, but the fire that falls from the ceiling illuminates it pretty well. You know how you put a bucket up on top of a door? A bucket of alchemist fire. Alchemist fire is like Greek fire. Ok, yep.

It falls onto you. Damn. Burned face. Leo ducks, dives and rolls out of the way, taking no damage. Holding my bloody arm. Periwinkle, the alchemist fire does 6 points of damage to you. Ah, alright. The warehouse, or the part that you can see is now illuminated by the fire. There's many different boxes here.

All of them have that sure foot family crest stamped onto the side of is it a shamrock? No, it's a leprechaun. That's got to be sort of offensive. Wait, no, leprechauns are probably like a thing. They are, yeah. They're a race. So we so weird. The Shawfoot family assures everyone they do business with that their gold cutlery and goldenware comes from only sustainably sourced leprechauns.

You know there are terrible leprechaun mines somewhere where it's just like rows and rows of rainbows. Is it basically like blood diamond? Is that the setup that I imagine here? Where's the pot? Where's the pot? There's meant to be a party under this rainbow. In actuality, you might know that the Surefoot family run a scam using...

Well, with leprechauns using leprechaun gold. Yeah, not fair, not fair. She makes sense. Ugh. OK. Other than that, though, you don't see any people, but it's a big place. Yeah. Can I stand in the warehouse? She's gonna yell,

Fee-fie-foe-fum, I smell the blood of ginger scum. LAUGHTER Oh, that's... No-one responds. You guys can move into the warehouse if you want. Damn it. Yes, I do. You slowly creep in. Have you done a healing potion for anyone? No. responds. You guys can move into the warehouse if you want. Yes, I do. You slowly creep in. Did we get any healing potions from anyone?

No. I want to scan around to see if there's like a manhole actually. My plan hole is to find a manhole. Plan hole, find a manhole. That's plan hole in the game. Inside? Do you mean? Yeah, because there was like a... they come from underneath. You can't see any manholes, but you'd have to like start giving this place a thorough search. Alright, am I seeing further than the illuminated area with my dark vision?

Not really, no. The illumination actually casts light further than what your dark vision can normally see. Switch out of dark vision. If you haven't played Splinter Cell, the noise when you turn your night vision on and off. Pierce, you can you're just gonna keep going? How close does the on and off. What? Pierce, you're just going to keep going? How close does the chain sound like he is? Very close. Okay, so to drink a health potion and then smash a health potion to make a makeshift weapon.

One move? Sure. I'll do that then. And also, quick question, if I just stab a were-out with a broken health potion, that's not going to heal him. Oh, that would be a good place. Depends how much trace amounts of health potion. Fuck, I'll dip it in the sewer. I'll get it nice and...

Give him sepsis. You recover 10 hit points. Sweet. And then I'm just gonna wait. Make sure health potion smash bottle at the ready to fight this were-rat to the death. Craig Piss is cleaning off his debts right now. Rah! Out of the darkness it comes at you. He looks significantly different than when you last saw him.

When you last saw Shane the were-rat, he was like, he had smooth, silky fur, like a house dog or something like that, an animal that has been looked after. Or a lab rat. Or a lab rat, an animal that has been or a lab rat or a lab rat Yeah, an animal that has been looked after you believe that potentially Shane has stayed as a were rat Oh, you last saw him that can't be good for a were creature Don't stay is the thing you becoming his one silky fur is now shaggy and mottled in patches You can see like his hair is starting to thin on his haunches And he's got these sickly like bumps and such.

Looks like he might have mange or something. He lands on you. Oh fuck. He sinks his teeth deep into your shoulder. As he tries to claw at you, you slash upwards with the broken health potion bottle and you cut him along his chest and then into his neck. Blood starts coming out thick and fast and you feel the air leave his lungs.

GOOSE Oh! Crit pop! BAJO Oh, crit fail for him. GOOSE Oh, well hey look, I got him still. BAJO I like that they're like, no no no, you didn't do something good, the were-rat fucked up. GOOSE You did something bad. BAJO Periwinkle, you go first. There's a maze of boxes.

In typical horror trope, I turn to Leo and I'm like, you wanna split up? We can cover more ground. Scooby-doo that shit. We Scooby-doo that shit and split up. As you're creeping forward, you take a step in this maze of boxes and you feel like a

twang! You know you've tripped something? You look around wildly in the darkness and from in between a tiny little gap in between two boxes, a massive like half a tree trunk swings outwards to try and slam into you. Jesus. It catches you in the side, twisting you around. You take ten points of damage. Jesus.

We should have looked for traps first. The tree trunk slowly starts like, whomp, whomp, whomp, like slowing down. I just yell out, there are traps! Fair enough. Then, yeah, I'll just kind of maybe slow my progress, but look for traps. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Keep searching. I'll call out, found another, he just looked out the trip. Why is it too late? Ah. Okay. Distantly, you all hear the sounds of the mob.

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