D&D is For Nerds - Stories of The Greyhill Free Company I #1 Welcome to the Company

Episode Date: May 8, 2021

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Sands Pants Radio, Australia's most family-friendly podcast network. in Melbourne on Saturday, June 5th, and want to see myself, Jackson, and Joel Dusha live and in the flesh, just head to the link in the show notes, and you can be disappointed in us in real time for the bad things we say. We're performing at the Comedy Republic at 6.30pm, so why not come in early and have a meal in the city, make a night of it, dinner, booing at your least favourite boys, a sneaky bev or two, and then home in bed by nine. The perfect way to spend a Saturday night. So once again, tickets are in the show notes. They are limited, so get in quick. The Greyhill Free Company is a loose amalgamation of several different adventurers. Within their numbers are many, but at the camp today, there are Kent Noora,

Today, there are Kent Nura. There is Travertine. There is Falmorn. There is Morimarsh. There is... Adam. Adam, no. I started writing these down.

I started. Chantel Stormbender. Okay, you've chosen this. Thamri Cherrycheeks. No. I will write Cherry Cheeks. No. I will write that one down, actually. And then, of course, there are Tree Stump and Globble. Tree Stump and Globble, who are you?

I'm Tree Stump. I'm a Goliath Barbarian. Yes, I am Globble. I am what people call a Lockerfan? Is that right? Or Lockertha? global. I am what people call a locothan, is that right? Or locotha? Because I'm fish folk. I like to imagine that I'm

in a top hat, a very fancy jacket, blue jacket, white tights, like those like a buckle, like buckled shoes, maybe a cane if I can have that, and like a ruffled top. Like kind of like a French aristocracy if you will

Sure That's very nice, I've got a tunic Yes I once gave it to my dwarf friend, it was a knight's dress Went over his little feet Oh he tripped over but I

picked him back up The Greyhill Free Company is a loose amalgamation of adventurers who have agreed to come together to work together to solve various contracts throughout the region. Money for adventuring contracts

has skyrocketed recently as there has been an influx from a massive adventuring outfit basically contracting out people's needs to small companies like the grey hill free company you are inundated with contracts in fact as you speak one of your compatriots or several of your compatriots falmorn the half elf wizard and morimash the half or barbarian, although he would call himself a businessman. Sorry, the half-orc businessman.

Please excuse me. Okay, so we've got a half-orc business boy. And Falmorn, the wizard. They have come back from town, bringing a big sack of papers. They dump the papers out onto the table in the middle of your camp. And Morimash, gesturing to it, says, Please, peruse at your discretion. There are many contracts here.

Any one of us can pick any contract, but we must be careful to not double up, as it were. Yeah, okay, yes. So if only one person's holding the paper, it's okay? I suppose so, yes. Do we just take the paper off the table so no one else can pick it? Everyone may peruse. Certainly other people have started perusing to their own

delight. I think that would help. It's okay. Thamri Cherrycheeks. Here, tree stump, you read this one. I want to hand tree stump just the first one that I pick up. Sure. Can you read? I was just wondering that myself and I'm sure I can. Are barbarians illiterate in Fifth Ed, Adam?

It's no longer a class feature. But you can choose to be illiterate. That's up to you. I don't mind. Could I please have some help? Yes, of course. Are you going to choose illiteracy? Yes.

All right. Tell you what. Pick a number between 1 and 31, because I have yet to get a random number generator for this. 29. 29? You're getting a good boy card. Ah! Yeah.

Ah, how fortuitous. Something good happens to you. The DM decides what. All right. All right. Well, I guess. Is Tree Stump? Yes.

I'm a little fella, right? Like I'm like real tiny. I imagine I was tiny. How tiny am I? I think you're medium size. What? Yeah. Where is it?

Size, size, size, size, size. Cass, you played one of these yourself at one point. I imagine me to be so big and beautifully round. I imagine I was just swollen with wet. Medium. Really? I imagine you're like a really tiny... I'm a very short fish lad.

You can be as short as you want. You can be basically as short as Cass. Thamry Cherrycheeks, the halfling, flucks one of the pieces of paper off the table as well and opens it up to have a look at it. He's standing next to Tavritine, the Arakokra. The Arakokra is a member of a monastic order.

You're not sure which one. He is not a talkative Arakokra, although you have yet to meet a talkative Arakokra, though you've only met the one. Ah, here. Okay, well, I'll grab one. I hand it over to Tristam. See that she's a bit struggling, and I'm like, don't worry, here.

I trust you, actually. We'll read it out together if you want to follow along. I'll point to the words that I'm reading, and then you can read with me, if that makes sense. We'll trace the words, the letters with your finger, and then we can read. I know some words. Yes, what did you know? Tavern

Tavern, that's very good. That starts with A Oh no. What does it look like? A man going to get the hug. Yes it does Well done. And then a man standing with his legs apart with his pants down. Yes. That's an A And then a man folding over

with his legs up. Yep, that's a B And then two cats going to sleep on the bed. Yes, I can see how that would make sense. Yes, yes, yes. And then two different cats. Perfect. Sleeping on a different bed. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, of course.

And the last one looks like when you fall down the stairs. It does look like when you fall down the stairs. It's very well done, Tree Stump, yes, yeah, of course. And the last one looks like when you fall down the stairs. It does look like when you fall down the stairs. It's very well done, Tree Stump. Yes, yes. So here we have, we'll look over this together. Yes. We have the contract. It's Sears.

For collection, Breastplate of the Hulk. Ah, Breastplate of the Hulk. It's a set of full plate armor that is said or rumored to be currently in the possession of a small band of goblins worshipping, and I quote, some damn heathen god or goddess. It's got a rough location not too far from here. There's a kind of like a brushy scrublandy sort of area you are in candor right now and really close to patches of the iron uh the iron tree forest so around the iron tree forest is a lot of just something about the way that iron trees grow they create a lot of scrub land around them and uh in in a scrub land in a patch of the iron tree not too far from here, there is this goblin tribe.

They are not going to be in the area long. You have maybe a week to find them, and to get to this particular place is going to take you at least three days. Right, well, that's if you took this contract. This one here is what we fought goblins for, right? You know, those little fellas with the big ears, green skin, teeth. That breastplate won't fit them at all. No, no, no.

That's not good. I have my own sizing issues and I feel for the Hulk who's lost it. It costs a lot of money to get them custom made that big. Well, if it is one perhaps for a Hulk, perhaps even, you know, why don't we go and make the contract? Perhaps, for example, if it is a breastplate for a giant hulking person, maybe it's good for you, or we just cash it in for you. How much is the contract for?

The contract is to bring in the breastplate, and you will receive, we'll say, 500 gold upon completion. We've fought some goblins before, yes? Yes. Yes. I fought a lot of goblins before, yes? Yes. Yes. Fought a lot of goblins. Yes. I kicked them.

You do kick them. Very high. You do. You're very powerful, Tristan. Thank you. Yes. Would you like to check any other contracts? Yeah, what are the contracts we got?

All right. You pick another contract. This one, C.S. The bestial linen handkerchief of friendship for collection. So this one is the bestial handkerchief of... Okay, keep reading. This one is to be collected in... So this one must be taken from a fairy.

A fairy? Yeah. There are Huntsman's reports of also not too far from here, but in the opposite, well, all of these are going to be in the local area because your two compatriots have only grabbed ones that are local to where your camp is. Like Marketplace. Makes sense. But two days in the exact opposite direction, there is apparently a small lake.

The lake is largely a small lake. The lake is largely uninhabited. It's a very, very untracked area. These two woodsmen happened upon the lake and saw a fae using this fabled item. Right. How much is that contract worth? That contract is worth... Not much.

It would only be worth about 100 gold upon completion. But it's probably easier. It is very wet. It is very wet. Look, three deck, where's the map of where the goblins might be? Is there any lakes or ponds on the way? On the way? Yes. Any small outlets or a river, a stream

perhaps? Are you trying to knock over two in one? No, no, no. I need to be wet. Oh, I see what you're saying I'm a wet boy and I need to constantly maintain my wetness Highs or lows? Highs You could add an extra day to your trip to stop at a lake Okay, so either way is fine for me

You do need to be submerged every four hours Yes, yes, yes I do Well I think a day is probably not going to help That's true, yes, you're right Well, I think a day is probably not going to help. That's true. Yes, you're right. Right right there. Another number between 1 and 31. Right right there.

22. 22. I think we've got off on the wrong foot. Reroll any charisma-based check with advantage. Yes, well. Very well, very well accurately put, Cass. That's all right. Do I have a container that I could fit myself in?

Do you have a container that you could fit yourself in? No. Can I acquire one or can we make one? Well, if, if we take the contract for 500 gold. Yes. Maybe we could buy one. Yes. In, in the future, yes, of course, we could do that.

Fortunately, I wonder, as we're saying this conversation, maybe hop into a makeshift bath that is in, or just a hole that's been dug out filled with water. I'd say that's fine. Are we in a tavern? No, you're in a camp. And as I'm saying this to hop in fully clothed, yes, well, of course, that house has us in the future, but for me, it doesn't

help me. It doesn't help me now. That's true. Yes. But I think having one for your future will be a good investment. I think you're onto something there, Trish Dump. Yes, I agree. A big bucket for a little friend. Yes. Is there a big bucket for a little friend we can have?

Perhaps my good friend here can harness it on her back and every few hours I could dunk my face into. Oh my god, Papoose? Just a water poose that I can hoof. Highs or lows? Lows.

Alright. The bath that you are currently using is small enough that with some difficulty it could be strapped to your good friend's back. Though this would nearly double the time it takes to go anywhere. Because not only is the Goliath now carrying you, but they are carrying a thing of water. Oh, that's right. I can make my own water. That's fine. What about I just carry the thing on my back

and it's more of a transport deal? So it's on my back. When we need to use it, it pops off. Yeah, yeah, yes. So every time we need to rest. That is very complicated. How? Every time we have to rest for four hours,

I will just hop in there. All right. So you're transporting the bucket. You are. Like a backpack. Yeah, you're still going to move You are... Like a backpack. Yeah, you're still going to move very slowly. Yes.

Even without the water and the weight of my friend? Yes. Which is nothing. Oh, my God. It's literally nothing but the water. You actually could not do this if you weren't a Goliath. That's why we're the bestest of friends. Yeah, you can only barely do this because you are, in fact, a Goliath. I'm glad to be useful.

Bestest of friends. Thank you very much, Tristam. I adore you every day. I cherish every moment that we are together. If we can find one that's lighter, we'll be able to go faster. So are you going to fashion it yourself? Yeah, I reckon I could. Cool.

This is a quick pause. Sure thing, Tristam. Yes. All right. So highs or lows? Highs. Okay. You nearly destroy it.

Okay. Your first idea is, well, I could just put a hole through it and then put the strap through that hole, and you do not realize what putting a hole in the bucket will do to it. Makes it lighter. And you're like, well, the smartest place to put it would be in the bottom. You're about to punch a hole through the bottom of the bucket when, I'm going to say, Falmorn, the wizard, stops you and is like, dearest friend, what is this? Well, what I'm trying to do is attach the bucket to my back

so I can make sure my friend doesn't die. And I'm thinking the cleverest way to do that would be with a strap. But now to get the strap on, well, that's where I come in. Put the hole in the bucket for the strap and the the bucket can't fall off my back or the strap aha they're they're like nodding listening intently and when you're done talking falmorn says maybe we'll get some glue or something instead and then we'll attach it to the remnants of a backpack or something. I could just punch the hole. No.

See, if you punch a hole, it's not going to be able to hold water. Of course. Yes, yes. It won't hold water. Ah, thank you. Yes, no worries. The bucket's for holding my friend. You are so good at this, Falmorn says, but please let me do it.

Oh, God, that's so nice. That is so nice. Look, this is going to be too much trouble. Thank you. You're very welcome. Do we have a spare shovel? Because if you could dig a hole every four hours, I could fill that with water

and just warm it up pretty good there. A shovel would be easier to carry. You could probably find one around camp. We can do that. I mean, look, I just don't want to be a hassle. I just, I like breathing. And I do need my whole body. I breathe through my skin.

I don't know if you know this about me, but I breathe through my skin. And I need, look, ideally a lake or some kind of stream, like rushing water, because that's like fresh water and air into my lungs. And I need that. But I will, like, look, at a pinch, a hole in the ground, water because that's like fresh water and air into my lungs and i need that but i will like look at a pinch a hole in the ground muddy water is fine kentura the the lizard folk the strangest member of your group kentura is uh kentura is the sort of person who just disappears for days on end and will sometimes come back having completed a quest or having killed

an animal. And typically it's not an animal you would expect. You have never seen... You are so shocked when Kentura comes back with bear and is like, food? Thank you. And then Kentura unhinges their

fucking jaw. Kentura unhinges their fucking jaw. Kentura approaches you. Yes. Water. Yes. Need. Yes. I can help.

Oh, yes. Yes. I find water in ground. Right. We'll bring Kentura. Yes. Yes. He wants to come with us.

We're going to make 500, 300. 500 gold. I think we're going to... What are the other kind of contracts? What's the most expensive contract? You want to go through and just find the most expensive contract? We'll have a rifle. Well, we're thinking of either the breastplate or the...

The breastplate. Yes, the breastplate. Breastplate. Or we have this handkerchief. Handkerchief or a top. Handkerchief or a top, reallykerchief or a top, really. Or perhaps we'll raffle through. If we can make a lot of money, we'll be rich.

Yes. You've noticed, by the way, as well, that since you've started this, every single contract seems to be acquiring a magical item or finding the location of a magical creature. It's like a treasure hunt. Yeah, it tends to be like fetch quests, pretty much every single one of them. I'm excited. Have we done many contracts ourselves? How many have we completed?

You can determine that yourself. You're both first level adventurers, so... This might be like a second or third adventure. Highs or lows? Highs. The most expensive contract you can find is another fetch request. It's to acquire an item called the Sword Sage Amulet of the Fortune Teller. Okay, so the Sword Sage Amulet of the Fortune Teller. There is like an abandoned church, once again, not too far from here, maybe about five days directly north along the main road

that would normally take you deeper into Kandor, but this specific road actually kind of leads nowhere no one's exactly sure well you don't exactly know what the purpose of this road is but it might have been just to lead people to this this chapel the chapel is inhabited by a a cult that worships some sort of demonic frog yeah this contract oh not not for you though that worship some sort of demonic frog. Yeah. This contract. Oh, not for you, though. Yeah. You, frog?

No, no, no. I'm a fish. I can see the same thing. See, a frog is a bit, well, look, we're quite similar. I'm more akin to, you know those things that swim in the lake that you don't see on land? So when you pick them up, they're all wiggling around, yes? Fish.

Yes, yes. Fish. The fish. You know how you put a fish on land, it doesn't do quite well? Yes. Yeah, whereas a frog on land, completely fine. Yes. So I'm kind of more like the fish, but I can survive on the land a little bit.

I make a face that shows it's almost like it hurt me to try. So like aspects of the frog, I'm fine on land, but only for a little. Okay. For aspects, traits, do you know traits? No. Similarities. Yes. So I'm quite similar to both, but I'm more similar to a fish.

Oh. Right. You know how, say, dragon-borns, I guess kobolds kind of have more of an affinity to dragons. Yes. And humans to chimps and apes. Yes. And tabaxi to cats. And our good arochocra fella. Arochocra. good arochocra fella to birds,

and you to, I guess, a bigger ape, me to fish. Huh. Yes. Thank you. That's okay. And now, a word from our sponsors. A unique tavern placed into your 5e campaign world, wherever and whenever you need it. With over 200 pages of content, including 12 adventure modules written by members of the 5e community.

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and the other parent was a fish. Got it. Done. How could I have been so daft? And when you're like, you know, like you, like humans like apes, I'm like, wait, hang on. Every human has a parent that's a monkey? I'm glad you're not vocalizing this.

Oh, no. So then every single one, like the Aricocca, like human and bird, but more close to bird. I'm like, okay, so the closer one's the mum. That makes sense. They come out of the mum. Every Aricocra is when a bird and a person fall in love

and I'm trying to think which of my parent was the big ape and I think it was dad! Because he was bigger and he did have more hair than mum, but then where did they come from? This contract is worth 1,500 gold upon completion.

I think we can do it. You could potentially actually accomplish the Sword Sage amulet and the Breastplate of the Hulk in the same go without needing to return to camp That's pretty cool As much as I want this handkerchief one So this one is over here And quite frankly, we're not going to go anywhere near that

That's just one thing and that's one journey Whereas actually, if we could take these two contracts, we could do a twofer. Combine them. Do more, get more. Do more, get more. Get a breastplate. Same effort, more reward. And an amulet. A necklace and a top. Ah, beautiful outfit. Yes, well,

it was okay with your Fal-Fal? No, not Fal-Morn. Who's the business boy? The half-orc. Oh, Moramash. Moramash, sorry. Yes, I think Moramash. I think we're probably going to do...

Yeah, there's these two. Moramash. Moramash. So, so sorry. Moramash, but one word. And it was half-orc? Half-orc, yeah. Yes, the half-orc business boy.

Moramash, yes. I think me and Tristamp here and perhaps Kentura will look at this half-orc business boy. Morimash, yes. I think me and Tristamp here and perhaps Kendura will look at this Yeola? Yeola the Tiefling, who is some sort of cultist themselves, a devil worshipper, perhaps, and Chantel

Stormbender, who is a human knight. You're not sure exactly what Chantel's skill set is. Chantel has been with this company for some time, but you've never actually gone on an adventure with them. But they are heavily armed. Armed and armored.

Both of them are like, have a bunch of contracts scattered before them, and are just like whispering to themselves, going through it quite clearly, trying to plot out their own trip somewhere. Okay. Well, they're doing their things.

I think they're probably... We're probably going to need a couple of people to help. Yes? Kentura? Kentura. I think we're Kentura. You're on... You want to help us with these contracts, Kentura?

Kentura help. Kentura slowly nods. What is the race of Kentura again? Kentura is a lizard folk. So I stare at Kentura for a bit with my new knowledge and think, mum was snake, dad was person, cool. Mum was Kentura. I don't say this out loud.

Oh, okay. This is mentally me being like. Kentura can read minds. It deals psychic damage. Keturah can read minds. It deals psychic damage. Well, while you're mentally doing that, Thamri Cherrycheeks, the halfling cut purse,

holds up one of the contracts and says, you might be wanting this. This contract's also in the same direction as the other two. You've got to go in there. I, however, happen to be holding on to this one, and I would happily let you have it if I were to come along with you. Yes, of course.

How much is the other contract? What we're doing, adding to the trip, I think that would be a great idea. Because then we have to split them. But we're adding another contract, so then if we split that four ways, it's perfect. It's a quickie, only 100 gold but in and out, shouldn't be hard it's a

we're just looking for the location of a a dragon and we just have to find the location we don't have to take on the dragon at all some sort of worm like creature just been spotted in the sky we just need to find the location We don't have to take on the dragon at all Some sort of worm-like creature Just been spotted in the sky

We just need to find where it lives We're not actually fighting the dragon We don't need to fight it We just need to put it on As part of the thing There's like a map of the area Where the creature has been seen We just need to point out on this map

Where it lives That's all we've got to do It might not be a dragon as well It could just be some wyvern Or wyvern Or whatever you call But it's somewhere on this map where it lives. That's all we've got to do. It might not be a dragon as well. It could just be some wyvern or wyvern or whatever you call. Yeah. But it's somewhere on this map, props. Okay. Well, we'll probably handle that.

If we're going in the same direction, the more the merrier for money. Yes, yes, yes. And then I'll get a nice little tub, maybe a lightweight one that you would carry me in. Yes. And what do you want? To win. To win. And you want to win

That's good Anywho I think that's probably it Anybody else want to come along? We're doing these three Anything else? Four people I think you'd need to

I don't know, I think your party's full I don't think anyone could join you now. No, no, no. You could have one more person if you wanted to. It looks like Chantel and Yayola are probably going to be going on their own path. That's fine. You could, if you wanted to grab them, you'd probably end up grabbing both of them because they seem to be pretty set with each other. Yayola is, like I said, some sort of devil worshipper or a demon worshipper of some sort.

You're not 100% sure. Maybe a cultist. And then Chantel is a tough looking knight of some sort. They seem to be having their own thing. They want to do their own thing by themselves. They've already got their own... I don't know... Morimash is a legitimate businessman. If you ask him,

that's what his business is. I don't want to cut them in. It looks like... Not only are they quite capable, I also feel that they might want a larger cut. They can't have it. Yes.

Muramash, despite his legitimate business, if you were looking for what he could provide in a fight, he is built. Yes. He looks like he could crush even tree stump. Falmorn is a wizard. Big old book, dusty looking glasses, Tavertine like I said is a monk of a monastic

order though none specified Tavertine is not popular in the group he just doesn't socialize that's fair and then finally Kentura Kentura we're definitely taking Kentura

we're definitely taking Cherry Cheeks. I might kind of put it to the rest of the Greyhill companions. What are we again? Greyhill Order. Free Company. Greyhill Free Company. Right. Well, we've got these particular contracts.

Is there any more in that sort of vicinity that anyone wants to join us, perhaps? So, you could, if you wanted to, you could grab Mora Marsh or Falmorn, but probably not both. That's fair. Which would you prefer? So, what is, so Kintora is a lizard folk who can take down

a bear by themselves. Yeah, some sort of hunter. Some sort of hunter, right. Enjoys the wild. Okay, right. And we've got the cut purse. Probably, yeah, Felmon. You seem to be a friendly sword. I don't want to cut him in.

Felmon's so nice to you. I offered to wear it in the glue. He did. He's the smartest man I've ever met. But we just got to have them, don't you think? You don't want them? Should we stop? I just think I've ever met. But we just got to have them, don't you think? You don't want him? Should we stop? I just think I like her already.

But if you really want to, I don't want to be me. It's okay. Is there any other contract Felmorn around that area? Felmorn looks over at it. They look back at you and say, Don't think so. You are right. They are the smartest person I've ever seen in my whole life.

Do you think that would – I'm just doing some equations. Do you think they're going to be an asset? Oh, yes. They're tremendous. We're all assets here. Worth the cut. Oh, 100%. What is the deal we have with this particular particular you'll be splitting an equal every uh

everyone will get an equal share okay does anything go towards the company itself or oh uh yeah change goes over to the company itself so if you're paid 500 gold for a job and there are i don't know six of you yeah obviously that's not going to divide evenly yeah so any leftover goes to the company and it goes to the coffers. This is kind of like a loose rule. You don't really have to obey the rule if you want. Everyone's just kind of like on their honor. Some people contribute more to that kitty than others do.

And this kitty just goes towards like camp supplies, food, that sort of stuff. Join things that get used by everyone. Yes. And how much is our current one? How much is the current payout if we do everything? Well, if you did these three jobs, you would get a payout of 2,100 gold. That's so much money. Okay.

Which would actually evenly split five ways, but you would probably over the course of your quest, acquire other odds and ends like from conquests and stuff. And so that would probably imbalance it. And also, you've got to imagine, so you're a very

tough person. Ciri's Kintora. We've got the sneaky boy over there with Cherry Chicks. I can heal everybody and we don't really have a... A wizard is always good to have in any sort of adventuring party there, Chisa. I suppose

I could punch the hole in the bucket, but someone has to know to not punch the hole in the bucket. Okay. We need someone like that Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We need someone like that on the team. Because otherwise, to be honest… Oh, the pocket of devils in them.

I know, yes. To be honest, I would have let you do it. I thought it was a great idea. So we kind of need someone like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, yeah, farewell. Taking all of our ideas from great to better. Yes, exactly. So we are

at a head here. I want to point to like, you know, midway up my chest. Like, we're at here. And I believe Thelma brings us up to here. And I want to like, over my head. That's too tall. I want to like, lower my hand to just where my head is. Good, good. I don't

realize that the height is relative. Is it? Well, like, if he puts his hand above his head, I'm like, that's higher than both of our heads. Yeah. No. That's too much.

And then if he lowers his head, I'm like, oh, good, we'll be safe. It's not too tall above our heads. I'm not sure of several pieces of logic here. Well, I'm... So why could you be too tall? Scary. So, like, if he's like, we're up to here and it's up to the chest, like, wow, that's almost a whole person. Then he goes even higher, like, oh, no.

Mm, mm, you can't feel it. Well, sometimes, well, okay, because sometimes tree stump learns a bit too much and it's scary and it hurts a bit. We've already seen this happen. So above the head, that's where the thinks go and that's too much. Yes, if you think about a brain like a bucket, if you feel it up to the brim, that's a lot in there. But if you go above that brim, where does it go?

Where does it go? And that's terrifying. It goes out somewhere that we haven't thought about yet. And that, I believe, is, yeah, that's too much. So, yes, over here. So I think Falcom brings us to there. All right. That's a good amount.

So how would you like to do the loop? Would you like to do the loop cultists first, goblins second, or goblins first, cultists second? And this entire time you're looking to find where that wyvern or dragon or whatever scaly flying creature lives. Which one's the easier one? Well, the goblins are on the move, right? Yeah.

And the chapel cannot walk, correct? Correct. Right. As far as I'm aware. Okay. All right. So there's a possibility it might walk? You don't know. Correct? Right. As far as I'm aware. Okay. All right. So is it possible it might walk? You don't know?

This is terrifying. No, no, no. The goblins have little legs. I've never met a church that has more than one. So let us take on the goblins, and then we will deal with this chapel. That's good. Number between 1 and 31, Simon.

Let's go 6. Let me show you how. Roll a saving throw or attack roll for an ally using your bonus. Ooh. All right. So you set off? Yes. So we gather some supplies first, get what we need. Shovel.

Shovel. You know that shovel. The good thinking tree stump. Yes, a shovel. And then any kind of supplies that we might need. And then we'll, yes, we'll truff on off. What adventure awaits our eager party? Find out next time on Stories of the Greyhill Free Company. We have a lot of fun here at Sandspan's Radio, but to relax, I like to yell at or just generally bully my good friend slash enemy, Jackson.

And I've found the best way to do that is to give him a little responsibility and watch him fail miserably. That's why I love recording our show, Jackson Bailey Spooks America. Jackson, an avid amateur cryptozoologist and UFO enthusiast, loves to chat about supposed sightings and strange phenomena. And I love to mock him for not properly researching things or only looking into them 10 minutes before we start recording. It's good fun and the best way for me to unwind after a long day doing actual

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