D&D is For Nerds - The Last Queen of Bluebeach #3 Veiled Threats

Episode Date: May 5, 2018

In which our heroes navigate a world of political intrigue and mystery.Check out our upcoming lives shows and purchase your tickets for our Melb Fringe Shows or UK tour right here; http://www.sanspantsradio.com/live/Already purchased tickets for Melbourne Fringe and want that sweet 25% off? Just email [e-mail] and she’ll sort you out ASAP! To find out more about all the other podcasts taking part in the Podcasts of Annihilation, just head to http://dnd.wizards.com/poaWant to help support the show?Sanspants+: sanspantsplus.comPatreon: patreon.com/sanspantsradioPodkeep: sanspantsradio.podkeep.comUSB Tapes: audiobooksontape.comMerch: redbubble.com/people/sanspantsradio or teepublic.com/stores/sanspantsradio Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sands Pants Radio. How many of these goddamn Sands Pants Radios I gotta do in one evening? Three? That's alright then. Hello and welcome to episode three of The Last Queen of Blue Beach, a D&D's for Nerds adventure. Previously. The ailments afflicting this man become immediately apparent to you. He is dead. On the ground there's a satchel that must have come loose when the horse was stopped.

Open up that satchel. In the satchel is a handkerchief, which you pull out, and a sealed letter. When the light shines through the handkerchief, when you fold the handkerchief in half, the squiggly lines match up together and form a coastline. May I suggest that we make a quick vamoose and exit this particular place?

I agree, but I'm already leaving. I've grabbed old man. Yeah, brings out a candle. Get a candle there. Oh, let's just put that letter to the light. Oh, not too close. Careful, careful. Gotcha, you idiot!

Fell into my trap! The doors to the tavern burst open and a man walks in. His hand is gently resting on his sword heel. The officer wheels about to you, Petra. It's a pleasure to meet you. You sound very much like my good friend Pierre. It is the local accent.

That makes sense. Why don't we sound the same? I am not from the city itself So this is my accent Where are you from? The countryside Right, hello Within the city walls

The accent I have been told is different So, sorry, who are you? So, hi, who are you again? My name is Captain Mercer How do you spell that? M-E-R-C-E-R. Or Captain C-A-P-T-A-R-N. Mercer.

Captain Mercer. Pleased to meet you, Captain Mercer. Have you seen a man wearing a uniform similar to mine? Did you lose a friend? Yes. I'm very sorry. He's over here next to our good friend here, Falick. He walks past you towards the table.

Pierre is backed up, like, behind the bar. So what was his name? Frank. Does he say it like that? Yes. What rank was Frank? Are you a soldier? Yes.

Well, former soldier, actually. Retired. He was private. Is he lying? Because, fuck Adam, it sounds like he's lying. It sounds like he's rusing. I mean, like he is. He is.

He's not a good guy. He's the baddie. The good captain looks like perhaps he might be telling a fib. Telling bloody porcupines. Yes. So, yeah, that's him just there. That's Frank. The captain pulls back on the cover over quotation marks Frank

and looks him in the face. Yes. This is him who's the other one. He lets go of the cloth. That is phallic. While he was looking at Frank, can I just pocket it? Like the letter and the handkerchief. Yeah, sure.

You've got it in your pocket now. I just don't want to deny it. He walks over to the other one, pulls it back. He looks at the arrow. It's still, oh, did you take the arrow out of? Yeah, no. Over the course of checking him, perhaps you took the arrow out. Arrow next to him.

Yeah, he looks at the arrow, picks that up, and then lowers the thing back over Feliq and says, this is a royal arrow. Yeah, I couldn't help but notice. He starts, like, flipping it around in his fingers. Couldn't help but notice they're the same ones in your quiver there captain they are quite

common among guards and members of the royal guard so your perhaps you used one when you were

a soldier he starts just pacing the room yeah you well probably not actually because then

why didn't I know that before are yours often covered in poison too so Well, probably not, actually. Because then why didn't I know that before? Are yours often covered in poison, too? Pardon? I said, are yours often covered in poison, too? He walks, as he's pacing the room, he walks in between you, both of you, Nadi and Petra.

Sometimes when the needle raises, I will poison my arrows. It is common of the royal gob. So, Captain Mercer, it looks like one of your boys was killed by one of your boys. Perhaps. The facts of this situation have not all come in. Many people could have killed him. He looks you dead in the eyes when he says that. What's your current hypothesis? You're trying to intimidate him?

Look, I'm trying, but I'm just a bard. Do you actually want me to roll dice? Because that's how it typically works. I did forget earlier for the lie. I would like to intimidate, but like an intimidation where it's like, I know I don't got the tough,

so I'm going to try and bluff with mystery. Like they're in some- Bluff the tough. I'm going to bluff the tough with some mystery stuff. He's wearing heavy metal armor and is a foot taller than you. He looks down on you as you try to intimidate him and he seems unimpressed.

But like, can I go for like like, a mouse to elephant angle? No. Right. See, not sure what that is, but I'm assuming the answer is no. So can you tell me, like, what do you think? Because, like, we're just up a bit. Was it north where we went, where the bridge was? It's to the west.

The bridge. So a bit west there. I think that's where Franz maybe got attacked. Ah, that is unfortunate. Perhaps you should travel with me back to Blue Beach where we will give a full debrief of this situation. I feel as though we'd need to check with our... Oh, ma'am.

Perhaps have you gone up there? Because there was still some assailants up there. Have you been to the out west? No, I came from the east. That sounds like another lie. Convenient. West. Sorry, I got my directions best around.

The bridge is to the east. He says he comes from the west. Right. So then were you looking for young Fritz? He did not arrive at my predestined location. What was your predestined location? That actually sounds like the truth. We could just be bad at telling things.

That is the struggle. We could just be bad at telling things. That is the struggle. Right. Well, Captain Mercer, so it seems to me that you don't actually know who this young man is. What are you accusing me of? Well, the fact is I've used three different names to describe him and you haven't

balked once. Who are you exactly and what is your meaning to be here? My name is Captain Musser and I'm here to prevent further crimes. So what was the crime that that young man committed here? He did not commit a crime as far as I am aware. But the crime was committed. What crime? What crime?

Quite obviously murder. Well, Yes, obviously Murder sounds a lot like mercy I don't think Other than two crimes of murder I don't think any other crime has taken place here Has it? He gives you a sideways look

Maybe you interpreters He's trying to read you now I'm a trustworthy individual How dare he? Script flipped, motherfuckers. How do you react? Like quizzical. I do like my eyebrow up like, what are you trying to do?

You're checking me out. Is this also directed at me or not? Yeah, he probably looks at both of you actually, yeah. I respond with eyebrows like, ooh, you don't know what I'm thinking. Try and guess. It's an enigma in here. I don't even know what's going on. Did you happen to

pilfer from my companion a pouch, a messenger's pouch, full of any messengers? What kind of people do you think we are? That would be thievery and no other crimes have been committed on this day. We checked the person to see if any identification, but we couldn't find any. No.

He is, she is a pathological liar. Very well, Zen. He stands up. Adam making little noises. Scary, but very tense. He starts walking back towards the door. Well, if you happen to find any messages that might have gotten lost, perhaps, somewhere in the tavern, all you need to do is hang them outside this front door

This one right here He taps it So long as this is done By tomorrow morning I would not consider you a criminal An enemy of this state Right Hey I'm a former soldier

Good night He leaves Excuse me Do you want to take your compatriot with you? He's gone Rude Pierre from behind the table. Well, that was uncomfortable.

Just a little bit, Pierre. Just a little bit. Do you know who Captain Merthyr was at all? He shakes his head. No. I don't even think he was a captain, to be perfectly honest. I don't even think he was with the Royal Army, really. I don't think he is who he says he is.

Right. If he is, then you are in deep trouble You best be finding that wagon boy Okay then Please If he is who he says he is Perhaps it would be best that you not travel by roads If you plan on holding on to any messages you might have.

Yes. Pierre makes a good point. If he is who he says he is, then he probably wields a lot of power and the roads would be dangerous for you. So quick option here. Do we just simply burn the letter? Oh, my God. If you just burn the letter. Oh, fuck.

Well, like, you've memorized it. The map won't be as easy to memorize. Yeah, yeah. The map you're probably going to keep on you. Well, I am an artist, as we have discovered. Tattoo the map upon my body. Pierre, bring me a knife and your darkest ale.

Perhaps some ink. That probably will work a little better. Do it, Pierre. Twist, Adam. Adam? Twist, Adam. Adam? Do I have any spells that do... Uno momento, per favor.

He goes to get those things for you. Right, I'm just going to look at the message, not the map, the message and try to like, is there anything else here that we're missing? So if we did burn this letter that we haven't shot ourselves in the foot. We can make this into a song so that we can all remember it. Yes, mnemonic device.

Mnemonic device, I love it. Mnemonic? What do you call it? I don't know. Mnemonic. What does the letter say? Mnemonic tubes. Sorry?

What does the letter say word for word? The letter says, in regular ink, it says 535. Five? Is that in numbers or letters? 535 AM. Sorry. And then a date, which is a week from now, which is joining day, the day of, like, officially it's going to be signed into order

and celebrations begin for Blue Beach and Candle to become one nation. Then, if you hold it to the candle, it says sincerely and always yours, the conspiracy of blue. Does anybody have any spells that can make rain a little bit? Because what we could do is we can wet the letter so it's unreadable and then pin it on the outside and then make it rain so it looks like the rain's ruined the letter so we get off scot-free. We ain't got no Scots no more and we can leave.

I was going to say, if light showed something, would, like, other things show it? Could there be, like, a double hidden message? Is that a thing that can happen? Potentially. Not a bad place for a bath. You're not a spy, so you wouldn't know. But, like, it sounds like something that could be real.

You certainly know there are magical ways of concealing messages. So the shining a light to it is a very mundane way, like, you know, that's lemon juice or whatever writing on paper. But there are magical means of concealing a message on paper as well. Maybe I'm going to wake up old man. Yeah. Old man. Ah, man, so much has happened.

I've just been sleeping. Can I imagine I ate a banana before bed? Sure. Ma'am, old ma'am. Sorry, sorry. Do you mean a gnomeberry? Fucking gnomeberries. A dwarf stick, actually.

That's what the gnomes call them. Dwarves are very mad that gnomes call them mad Dwarf stick peel all over my bed I wake up What's happening? I just want to fill you in Into some of the happenstances that have happened I fill you in

Captain Mercer Sus is a bag of hornets We've been tattooing it all across Not a boy, that's the player I don't know Well that's what Not a boy said I feel this might be a little bit too extreme But that's what Not a boy wants to do

Not his body is ready He can't really stop Notty When he's got an idea in his head He's directed I like that about him Old man This paper here Oh you're in the room

Sorry for talking about you I actually love it When others talk about me Any magic on this Tell us all the messages on this I'll detect magic on this Sincerely and always yours, respectfully. I'll chuck on my spectacles, hold it like that,

and then detect magic with it. All right. You check the fabric, the weave of magic, around and about the paper, and you detect that there is some magical presence to it. There's a bit of magic, a touch of magic to this. Old man. Yes?

Would you at all be able to Change what it says Unfortunately that's a bit beyond me Is that up to you to decide I don't think I have any spells Have you asked God No he can't Reveal No I don't have it

Unfortunately I'm not quite built for that. What does my mending spell do? It repairs minor damage to objects. So if you hide a thing, well, here's a thought. If you tore it in half or something like that, you can put it back together. If we're trying to hide it, what if we tore it into little pieces? Then you could mend it down the track.

Well, because then we'd still have it. They want us to prove that we've given it up. No, they just want to... We've got several options here because either we can trust this pen wholeheartedly... Pierre comes back. He's got ink and a knife, what you need. The problem is with the map,

just letting you know, to give you extra considerations for your conversation, if you wish to tattoo it upon yourself, you would need enough room, which would only really be found on your washboard abs, I assume, or your washboard back, both of which make it very difficult for you to tattoo it. So either someone else tattoos it,

or you tattoo it onto someone else. I'll happily tattoo it upon you. I believe that I have the fine hand for my knitting and sewing. Do I have girthy thighs? Not girthy enough. It's a pretty detailed man. I know how much you love tattooing messaging your body. I'm already

like pulling up my shirt and holding it with my teeth. Your abs are very impressive. A bit of a touch there. I'd pulse them in and out for you. Very impressive. But don't you know if this is the best solution that we have, to be honest? Come on, you're from the wild. That's the shirt in your mouth, is it?

Yes. Well, if we tattoo it upon his body and then we get rid of the napkin. Just quickly, can you detect magic on the napkin as well? Yes, yes, I'll detect magic on the napkin. The napkin does not detect his magic. Well then yes, you can tattoo the map. Alright, I'll begin tattooing the map onto Notta Boy's body.

Where? Do you want it down the side of your ab? Because it's a coastline, yeah? Yeah, it's the coastline. So you can get the coastline going down like that, or along your back. Where do you want it? Kind of sexy on the ribs. That's kind of cool. You might want uh i use your 10 i'll use my 10 use my one if you want no no no my 10 my 10 my i mean like it won't change what you got on the roll

wow imagine imagine did it wrong did it backwards yeah you do a decent job of uh tattooing unfortunately the implements you have are not there's no you know there's a there's usual typical tools you use to tattoo someone and a medieval society just does not have access to them, frankly. So you do as good a job as you can, but there's smudging and it's not a perfect drawing. Oh, look, we can eat it up down the track. When you don't have a reference. Just like add a dragon. Is it an accurate representation of the map?

It's not perfect. It's not perfect, but it's better than going from your memory. Okay. Can I try and get Petra over here to have another crack on the other side? So where did we put the first map? The first one was down like that. Down on the ribs? Down on the other side? No, it'd have to be on your chest.

It's like just simply too big. On your chest or on your back. If it fits on a hanky, why can't it fit on me? It's very detailed on the hanky. Someone like went in with a very careful... It's easier to stitch something in a medieval society than it is to tattoo something. It's got to be a lot bigger when it's being tattooed.

You can... I would allow it to be done around an arm. Well, not an arm. Maybe around your thigh in a pinch, but then it's very difficult to get it to look right. So we basically have three goes. Four goes if we use both thighs. Or double that, or triple that if we use each other.

Yeah, that's true. We get a lot of goes with this. Who's the best at the art here? Oh, me. That one. It's not a boy. So wait. All right.

I'm going to negate that role, which would have been funny. Hang on. Hang on. Not a boy is the best artist? Not a boy is the best artist. You do more of an artist's interpretation. So not a boy is the best at the art here? I did do a smashing rendition of that boy.

You did. I really captured the dead in his eyes. He captured the lack of light in his eyes. Unfortunately, in Fifth Ed, there is no direct skill that governs this. But I would say... How about this? We just keep letters on ourselves. No more tattooing.

Why don't we A? Petra would probably be the best. Ah. Petra? Give it another go. Why not? Give it another crack. We're here.

This boy's got chest for days, Petra. Let me just touch them pecs. They're good. You're going to ruin them. Petra, you could touch these pecs. That's the sad thing. You're going to ruin them. All right. So you definitely want me to tattoo. All right. How about this. You're going to ruin them. That's the sad thing. You're going to ruin them. Alright, so you definitely want me to tattoo.

How about this? I'm going to tattoo and then I'm going to tell you my plan as I tattoo it, alright? Okay. Let's tattoo them delicious pecs. Ooh! Distracted by her body. We've ruined your body, Notta Boy. I'm sorry. Start doodling like, Nottaoy is taking me behind the bike shed.

What's a bike? It's like a child droid. It's not very good. So sorry. You don't even get to finish it. You're about halfway and you're like, it's ruined. It's just not good. How about this?

Sorry, let's just lower those. Okay, let's up the... All right, now let's lower the... Next one will look amazing. It's just not good. How about this? Let's just lower those. Now let's lower the next one. We'll look. Amazing. You take real good care of yourself. So what I'm suggesting here, how about this, is we just get a piece of paper.

I'll just write 5.35 a.m. on the date, right? And we'll just put that outside because that's just one of the messages there. So I'm assuming that nothing else is important so that we take the actual letter ourselves. And, okay, so this particular handkerchief, now, Nan, you're very good at knitwork. Yes. Can you maybe get another handkerchief and knit something else? I can certainly give it a go. And then we can just give him these decoy messages because, look, if he is who he says he is, then maybe we should have given these him to, you know, exactly as they were. Yeah. But I'm very sass and I don't think he is who he says he is, then maybe we should have given these him to, you know, exactly as they were.

But I'm very sass and I don't think he is who he says he is. So maybe this would just throw him off. All right, can I try and knit a decoy hanky? I would like to suggest that we write 635. You do a decent job of knitting a decoy hanky. All right, well, we've knitted a decoy hanky and we're going to Give him the wrong Time Yes wrong time

And date 6.35 This is actually The best rendition Of it that you've Done so far That's good I'm getting that up

6.35 And like maybe Like two days After Yeah And we'll put that Up on the outside No two days

Before No no after Cause then we get There first Yeah True But I'm just gonna Say like I mean

The date is going To be pretty obvious That it's going to be the joining day. So it just seems a bit odd. Maybe put, like, several hours, like change it to p.m. rather than a.m. on the date. How's the wagon coming? Oh, the wagon? Well, you check on Pierre. Pierre says, I have spoken with Pantelot, and he has volunteered his wagon.

It has the Gnomish Merchant Company branding on it, but you three are not gnomes. It will look very suspicious for you to drive it. Do you have any paint? We've got ink. We've got ink for days. We're just forging everything, aren't we? Well, if we just paint over the gnome symbol No one will know

I do not think we have enough ink or paint To paint over the logo We have to risk it If I ride a horse, my old bones I would I'll crumple I'm brittle If you are planning on making a stealth exit from here

It would be nearly impossible with the wagon. You might have to, I don't know, fight your way out. Alternatively, I can supply you with enough horses that you could make your way across the countryside. You would be a lot slower, but you would not attract as much attention.

Perhaps we should do that, to be honest. But if we're giving them what they want, surely they would not want to... No, we should do that, to be honest. But if we're giving them what they want, surely they would not want to... No, we should take the horse. Like, we can do both, you know what I mean? Yes, that would be the safer option. Why risk it? I'll deal, I'll ride a horse. When I write a song about this, I will not include this part.

Not sure. You write this song, we were very brave, we fought every single man and woman here very, like, vigilantly and quite stunningly, I would say. All right? Are we going to head off now or back to? I think it's probably best to head off now. Why don't we just put these decoy letters outside on the door

and whilst that's happening, we'll just sneak off into the night. Just an added precaution. Why don't we tear up the letter we have into three and each one of us takes one and then when we meet up, we can mend it with Not A Boy's Mending Spell. Let's do that with the letter and I believe the handkerchief. Yes, sounds good. Yes! Alright, and the best thing

now though is if Not A Boy gets caught well there's two shitty drawn maps on his chest so that's going to be very confusing as to which is the right one. Okay, so give me a... There's three maps going on right now, that's great. You guys have a very convoluted plan. Give me the summary.

So we've made a decoy hanky with a wrong map on it. We've also made a decoy letter with a wrong time and a wrong date. We've put them both out the front, pinned them up for the fella to find. In lad's bag. Yeah. Bam. We've also tattooed two maps on the washboard abs of Notaboy, which are terrible, but maybe we'll throw them off if Notaboy gets captured

because they won't be sure which is the real one. We've also taken our version of the handkerchief and the ladder and torn them into three and each taken one fragment so that if one of us gets captured, then they don't have the entire message or the entire handkerchief, but when we come together we can use the mending spell of Notaboy to make them whole again.

And then we alight on our horses and ride into the inky darkness. The end. You guys can catch some sleep if you want, such that you have a long rest before you set out. Unless you want to make haste and leave now, but you can, such that you have a long rest before you set out. Unless you want to make haste and leave now.

But you can still do that before the deadline of tomorrow. I'm out of spells. You're going to roll for the people? Because this is when you give them a one. I'll just chuck a one out there as I go to bed. Somewhere in the darkness you hear somewhere in the night you hear

pots and pans clanging And P.S. swearing I gotta fire off that one Before I go to sleep Otherwise it'll weigh on me You give out a cosmic one It's like I just wake up with a bad taste in my mouth If I don't

It makes sense Have a bit of a snooze A bit of a kip And then we try and stuffily That's fair. It makes sense. It makes sense. All right. Yeah, let's have a bit of a snooze. A little kip. A bit of a kip on the horse. Take it in turns. And then we try and stealthily get out of this border town. Jack, for your new day, you can re-roll your D20s. So exciting.

Oh, one and a two. Wonderful. Fuck up two people's day. Roger, dodger, lodger. So, you have your sneaky little nap, and all of you recover all of your hit points, plus you have spells back, et cetera, et cetera. Before the sun has risen, Pierre wakes you up. Old man, Petra and Noddy, I have arranged a second horse for you

so if you wish you may leave now let us perhaps you guys kept your own watch or whatever but Pierre also stayed up the entire night I have arranged a watch as best I could

and I think tomorrow morning I am going to perhaps close shop just for the day and funnel everyone out onto the road. Perhaps then, you know, maybe they, you know, maybe these people have trouble tracking you because there's so many people leaving.

This is very kind of you. Thank you so much. I don't know why you're being so kind. Look, you know what, here's an extra gold. So thank you so much. Look you. I don't know why you're being so kind. Look, you know what? Here's an extra gold. So thank you so much. Yeah, look, we really appreciate it. It's very nice. I'll spread.

Have you got any business cards or anything? Well, maybe. I don't know how your business runs. It could just be word of mouth, but we'll spread the word. Just inform people to come to the Who Goes There at the border. We did. We went there. We goes there at the border? We did. We went there. We goes there.

Now, just a quick further word of warning. The forests and area to the north of here, they are the best way for you to move. It's a thick forest that is very hard for people to track others in.

It might hamper you with your horses, but it would also hamper them So It's kind of You know Not the best situation But it is the best one That you could hope for

A bit of a tit for tat We get it The biggest warning is That those forests Are owned by One of the Family monopolies The Lord and Ladies

And there is a bit of Civil unrest Going on there The Local guard Constable Larry Are having a bit of Tr unrest going on there. The local guard, Constable Larry, are having a bit of trouble with it, but there are bandits in the area that you might need to contend with. If you keep your noses clean and do not look like you have too much money, I do not think they will bother you,

but it is something certainly to watch out for. Always a risk, always a risk. All right, thank you so much. Pierre, let us get on our horses and let's chuff along, shall we? I am myself a little friendly with the people to the north. They are the Normandy

family. Normandy family? Yes. Alright, I'll keep that in mind. All the forests and areas to the north of here are belonging to them and their monopoly. They are not amazing people, but I am friendly with them. If you mention my name, perhaps that might help.

All right. Thank you so much, Pierre. Certainly it will not help if you meet bandits. Fair enough. All right. I wish you luck, Godspeed, and good luck to you. How many horses? Did we have two?

You have two, yeah. Cool. I'll ride with somebody. Two each, Adam? We've got the horse from last night from that soldier boy. Yep. And now we've got an extra horse. Everyone thought of the song, right?

Yeah. All right, good. It doesn't nay, it goes oh No, you, it goes you You Is that a cow? Alright, sheep I'll hook up

I'll ride with Old man here, make sure that she's okay And we'll just Go along, shall we? Yes Sounds good You all sneak your way off north into the forest I am very sulky that I cannot play my music through the forest

If you want, you can just grab a leaf and fold it in half and you can play a tune that way I take that personally How fucking dare you I was just trying to be helpful, like it wouldn't be as loud as perhaps your heart but no offence there love none taken seems that there was a lot of offence taken

so very sorry no you know what you know what you wouldn't know I guess I don't I cannot put that on you because you wouldn't know you were in the army for so long know. I guess I don't. I cannot put that on you because you wouldn't know. You were in the army for so long.

It's three days of this. BT pubs. Oh boy. I'm so sorry. I don't hold it against you. Old man, you three days of this. Look, I'm fucking 81 or 71.

I've been through the wars. Petty squabbling is not a struggle for me. I just let them fight. We're not fighting. It feels like I'm in a fight that I don't know that I'm in. We're not fighting. It's not a fight. I don't, yeah.

You probably also pay a bit of attention to where you guys are going because someone, frankly, needs to keep track of where you're headed. You spot through the dense forest a worn huntsman's track.

It's typically made by deer but worn clear by hunters going through. You are able to start following that. It's going roughly in the right direction. So you speed yourselves up by doing that. Sweet. I'm going to get you two.

Reroll those dice. Just like, not three times. Just one more time? Yeah, just one more time. Just for this new day. Whatever day happens. Not too nice and soft, dude. Five and 13?

All right. Sorry to make you lose the 1 and the 2. Oh, okay. Jackson Bailey hotly does not care. What are you two laughing about? So much petty squabbling, huh? I think it's gone full circle.

We may be having a lover's tryst. We're buddies now. I'm starting to speak like her, you know. I'd like to change it up a bit. I think this is who I am for the next day. That is beautiful. Beautiful. I know.

I mentioned at the start of the campaign I like to put on new identities and boy, oh, boy, I think this accent could really bring my bar tunes up. Okay. I'm going to write a little tune called Lover's Squabble and it's dedicated to Petra who's... Do you know what? I'm actually going to say she's a babe. I'm going to go that far.

You are a bit of a hunk of all right. She got me squawking like a bird she does. Okay. Suze diddy from Noddy to Petra Petra is a babe Petra is a babe Petra is a babe Noddy loves Petra. Petra is a babe. Oh, Petra is a babe. Oh, Noddy loves Petra.

Yes, he does. And Noddy loves Petra just because. Oh, Petra's a babe. Oh, Petra's a babe. That was spectacular. Yeah, yeah. Well done. That was absolutely gorgeous.

Tears in my eyes. That was so beautiful. You can get a point of inspiration. Yes. How often can I get those? Asking for a friend? You either have it or you don't, unfortunately. Basically, point of inspiration is on a roll that you make,

you can be like, Adam, I'd like to use this point of inspiration, and it gives you an advantage, so a bonus to the roll. You can also use it to help an ally. So if Jackson's trying to do something, you can be like, Adam, I'd like to use this point of inspiration and it gives you an advantage. So a bonus to the role. You can also use it to help an ally. So if Jackson's trying to do something, you're like, I really want Jackson to succeed. Adam, I'm going to use my point of inspiration to give Jackson the advantage. It's basically a reward for role playing.

Well, I picked the right business game, didn't I, boys? I don't know what's happening. Did we come across any bandits? I put it on a new identity. I love this character. How long will Noddy's new identity last? Find out next time on

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