D&D is For Nerds - The Last Queen of Bluebeach #7 Normandy Forest

Episode Date: June 2, 2018

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Sants Pants Radio, ring ring, it's for you! Hello and welcome to episode 7 of The Last Queen of Bluebeach, a D&D's for nerds adventure. Previously. I would like to burst out of the bushes crying and using charm person. Sorry, and use charm person. Oh thank you Sebastian, you're great, you a friend. If your heart is valiant and brave as him, you're a good lad. Nice plate, Arma.

What are you? As dinner's set of crockery, you're going to crack onto the crockery's dress. I'm going to eat off of you. I'm going to make a meal out of you, boy. Oi, Sebastian. Wait, what am I going to make a meal out of you, boy. Oi, Sebastian. Wait, wait, what about I call you Sebastian? Oi, wait.

Let us know, why are you trying to find us and what's going on here? I have orders to do so. By who, if you don't mind us asking? The Queen herself. So, we need to find out from this gentleman why he thinks that we're the traitors. Who told him that? Because we find out who told him that, we find out who's at the heart

of the whole problem. Here's our bare, lumpy buttons. That is a very near thing. Sebastian is very mean. There goes lumpy Sebastian. You're in the forest of Normandy, taking that back trail. You've left the knight behind God, I should say, not the knight Whatever, tomato, tomato, largely

Tied him up, it was good That's right, you let him go, but naked? I forget Like a fish Like, we let him go, but it's worse than when we got there Give him a little kiss Send him back into the sea He hurt my feelings, but it was fine We hurt his feelings there. Give him a little kiss. Send him back into the sea. He hurt my feelings, but it was fine.

We hurt his feelings. It was good. We hurt a lot of him. You hurt their feelings. And then you kill the other guy. It's fine. You watched his lumpy body disappear into the forest. It was quite good. What a lumpy boy.

An oddly lumpy body. So, up ahead all three of you can hear the sounds of running water You can't see it through the tree line But you can hear possibly a river, maybe a stream Some body of water that is moving, certainly Okay, cool Have we rested since our deal with Sebastian? This journey is taking a while

It's been a couple days since that happened. Alright, so I get my key points back? Yes, key points. You've constantly been sort of looking over your shoulders, checking to make sure that people aren't following you. You've constantly got that fear that you're, well, now that you let the Sebastian,

also Sebastian, get away. The Sebastians, yep. One of the Sebastians get away. You know that eventually, yep. One of the Sebastians, get away. You know that eventually it's just a matter of time before he gets back to his people and they know where you are and vaguely where you're headed. I'm just a bit stressed. I'm just so worried. Just a little bit worried.

I'm still a bit stressful, yeah. Old man. Yes. year uh old ma'am yes you've been trying to keep track of where everyone is but you don't know this forest and the far the trail that you're following has these hopeless twists and turns you're you keep feeling like you're just going back in the direction you came from but to leave the trail is also pretty difficult yeah yeah with i assume you took the sole horse you got off the town guard, which means you each have a horse, but the horses cannot move easily through the trees.

It's so much faster to take the trail, but the trails, it's difficult to follow. Yeah. Sometimes it has this branching, smaller paths, and you're not sure whether or not to take those. You only know enough to know those you you only know enough to know that you don't know much that's frustrating right then so we just check out this body of water see what's going on there let me give it a swim hopefully you'll be able to orientate

yourself by the water cool you come around this really sharp bend in the trail and you can see the river running steadily and rapidly, a bridge over it, and a very large figure standing on the bridge with its arms folded. Does it look like a person? Is it a troll? A ways away. It's not a troll. It's got to be under the bridge, is that it? Roger.

Come on, Neo. Each of you squint your eyes. Noddy, you think it looks like a woman, a very large woman, muscular. That's our big lady. This looks like maybe just the guard of the bridge. She's got like a relaxed expression. Probably not too much of a trouble. Is she wearing like an insignia?

Do we know if she's got like town guard insignias or anything or is she just sort of, you know, in her Sunday best? No, she's wearing brown tights or similarly brown tunic, a green cape. And she has a, you know, like one of those elongated caps or whatever. Kind of like a Robin Hood hat? Yeah, like a Robin Hood. Almost dressed like a muscular Robin Hood. Awesome.

Yeah, like a muscular Robin Hood, I suppose. All right. But yeah, I a Robin Hood. Almost dressed like a muscular Robin Hood. Awesome. Yeah, like a muscular Robin Hood, I suppose. All right. But yeah, I'm not immediately... I see the good in everyone, even if it's not there. That's one of my fucking businesses. Oh, hello there, dear. I'll start waving and yelling as I approach. Perhaps as you approach, you remember those bandits you were warned about.

Yeah, well, not immediately, seemingly. Well, I'm always polite and respectful, so it's like, good day. Hi there, madam. How are you doing this fine morning, love? Welcome to the forests of Normandy. Thank you very much. We're just passing on our way, though, dearie. Oh, I am afraid that is out of the question.

Why would that be? This bridge, she stomps her foot on the wooden bridge beneath her, this bridge she stomps her foot on the uh the wooden bridge beneath her belongs not to you not to the uh local monopolies not even to the queen herself this bridge belongs to me and our compatriots that's all right if you wish to get across, you must either pay your way or you must fight your way across. What's the toll? What's the toll there? The toll is five gold per person. Oh, please.

Oh, please. Oh, no. You see, excuse me. My mum's so sick. She's just not well. We need the money for the medicines across the bridge grabs two massive 10-foot poles. She tosses one at the feet of your horses and says, poles. She tosses one at the feet of your horses

and says, if you wish to get across without paying the toll, you must beat me in fair combat. You need not kill each other, just the first one to wet the other, as it were. She taps the side of the bridge. No, no, you don't

understand, please. We've been running from this really malicious force that keeps trying to break our way into our minds, and I can't stop it. Me mum's so old, and it just makes it really hard. understand, please. We've been running from this really malicious force that keeps trying to break our way into our minds, and I can't stop it. Me mum's so old, and it just makes it really hard. I can feel it coming now. And I start to, like, have my eyes roll back into my head, like I'm getting the thing with vicious mockery,

but then I do it to her. So I can simply just, all right, then. All right, Take him out. Put him in the brink. She saves the blow. So saves the attack. So you attempt to viciously mock her with your words. She seems concerned.

The other one. Not the one where I say stuff. Dissonant whispers. Oh, dissonant whispers. Oh, well, then she'll take half damage. You wrap your words around her mentally, but she is able to throw some of your mental attack off, and so you only deal half damage.

Hey, that's something. Did you feel that? She takes six points of damage. Oh, God, it's back again. Please help us. Merde! Treacherous! She's about to advance on you

when someone from the other side of the bridge calls out. On her side of the bridge calls out, Now, now, Jean. There is no reason to fight each other. A figure steps out from the bushes. The figure is dressed similarly, but much slimmer. She has long brown hair, which she's got tucked up into a bun underneath her cap. She approaches.

Hello there. Sorry, my compatriot, little John. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I figured that was come. Can be over there sometimes. Yeah, yeah. That's good. Can be overzealous sometimes Yeah

Yeah That's good She reaches out her hands To help little Jean As she passes over the bridge herself She's walking towards you She says Hello

My name is Roberta D. Hood Hello Roberta I'm It's a pleasure It's a pleasure to meet you My name is Petra We just come across in these here woods This is old man

And a very good friend, Noddy. Hi, I'm Noddy. He suffers from afflictions, shall we say. My legs are both broken. I couldn't help but see that you are magically gifted. Perhaps some sort of song weave. Some sort of magical song. Back in my village, I made a woman's undergarments evaporate.

Please, Little John. Go get the fryer. Little John leaves. Robin is a gender neutral man. It's not French, though. That's true. Is Roberta French? I don't think so.

Pretty sure it's Spanish, maybe. It's certainly closer to France. It's Europe. It's Europe. It's all the same. It's good. Don't even stress your pre-little head. Roberta de Hood finishes crossing the bridge,

and she extends a hand for I'm going to say you, Noddy, perhaps you were the closest to having cast the spell. I do not wish to cause you any harm if you simply, all three of you, dismount. I have a proposition for each of you. Yes, absolutely.

What's the proposition? She helps, you know, well, actually, no, wait, she'd help old man. Hey, I'm frail. Thank She helps, you know. Well, actually, no, wait. She'd help old man. Hey, I'm frail. She helps old man off the horse. Oh, thank you there, dearie. You're a darling. Very sweet of you.

All right. If you wish to follow me, we can keep your horses stabled here at the bridge. You can travel with me and my merry women. We will make camp nearby and I can explain to you my proposition. Yes, that seems like a fine thing. Having a bit of direction in the forest sounds quite nice, yes. Absolutely. I'll scurry along behind her.

All right. She leads you through. There's a small clearing not far away from where the bridge was, and there you encounter what you assume to be the bandits. They've made camp. There's kind of song dancing going on. It looks like a bit of a party's happening. Are they doing the...

What's that song from the Robin Hood cartoon? The movie? Is there a rooster? Hell, you know the one from Shrek. What kind of merriment's going on? What's going on here? A little platform has been cleared away, and people are dancing upon that. There's some people playing songs and stuff like that.

There's a lot of what you would assume to be civilians here, not bandits as well. It looks like peasantry, perhaps. What's the wine situation like? They have wine. Oh, guess who's getting a bit of a drink and a dance on? This fine young lady. I join in. There's a very drunk priest handing out goblets to anyone who passes by.

I join in merriment. I'll just find a nice comfortable place to sit. All right. Roberta sits with maybe old ma'am. And where would you like to be, Noddy? I want to go near to the musicians and just sulk. All right. There's maybe three musicians, one playing a pan flute,

one playing a lute, and the other, like, maybe some bongos or something. No, I have an issue with lutes. I stay very far away from them. No, I go very far from where the musicians are. Would you like to be dancing with Petra, or would you like to be sitting with Old Man? Or maybe just on your own, even. I have a dance with Petra or would you like to be sitting with Old Man? Or maybe just on your own. I have a dance with Petra, but I've always got one, like, glary eye at the luteist.

I love that, like, your previous two personalities, like, two personalities ago, you were just, like, so in love, you and Petra. But it's just gone now. That was the old me. I think it comes in circles. Yeah, you'll see him again. She knows I'll come back to her. It's all right. It's a little bit of fun.

Roberta sitting next to you begins talking with you. Yes. Am I to assume you are maybe the wise woman or the leader of your little band? That's a very accurate... Yes, yes, I am. All right. Well, as I said, my name is Roberta. These are my married women. your little bat. That's a very accurate... Yes, yes, I am. Alright. Well, as I said, my name is Roberto. These are my merry women.

Little Joan. Yes. She points towards the large woman who is currently carrying like six barrels of mead to the fryer. What a champ. Priestess Tuck. Or as we sometimes refer to her friar tuck

yes yes she's our healer if you will and the spiritual guide of our group does she have that friar tuck haircut? it is a sign of her order that's excellent I'd never go in for it but it's very nice it's quite pretty I have never go in for it, but it's very nice.

It's quite pretty. I have need of some compatriots, people who could fight alongside me, and faces that are not known to the Sheriff of Normandy. I must say, you're a bunch of ladies here. Everyone outside is calling you bandits, but you seem like. You seem like good people, I must say. Anyone who fights against this system is a bandit, surely. So if you fight against a corrupt system, of course they will label you a bandit. And which system would this be? The monopoly of families who control all of Brubitsch.

Yes, it's a problem. It's a problem. It truly is. They make the peasantry work like dogs. Right. Hang on, wait. Am I for the laws? No, I'm for the queen.

What are your thoughts on the passing of the queen? The stepping down, as it were. Well, stepping down, I have no problem with. But I do not care one way or another. I simply want the monopolies broken up. Do you know the awful, dreadful ways that they collect their monopolies? I must say, I do not. Yes, no, I don't.

The men or the soldiers of Blue Beach go away to fight the wars of Kandor. And while they are away, they are impoverished. They cannot tend to their farms. So the rich families who stay and refuse to fight for their country, for their nation, simply buy up their land. And so when the soldiers return, they return to nothing. That's terrible. That's absolutely disgusting.

It is criminal, is it not? It's not. It's not good. It's not good. You said you had a proposition for the three of us. Well, I need your help. Spring break! The sheriff of Normandy has imprisoned my beloved.

I need you to help me rescue him and scatter the Sheriff and his men. Right. Well, we're on something of a mission as well. I might just get my compadre, my friends over here as well. I could reward you with money or perhaps help you to the forest. Many people consider it a difficult journey. Yes, we've struggled. I'm not going to lie to you.

What is your destination? We're heading for... What the fuck is the name of the town? Blue Beach. Blue Beach. We're heading for Blue Beach, actually. We have a very important message for the plane. If you know the way, it is about a couple of days' travel.

That's excellent. Well, let me confer with the rest of my friends. You only have a couple days left, FYI. Oh, shit, we do. I'll head over to the two of you. Maybe three days. Hi there. Yes, what's going on?

Petra, what's this? Hi. Stop dancing. Just chatting to Roberta over there. Yes. And she wants us to help her with a little problem she's having. Mm-hmm. In an exchange, what she's suggesting is that she can take us through the forests

and get us to Blue Beach rather quickly. We do only have about three days left. That's probably a good idea. I mean, even if it's risky, I mean, we're going to be taking a risk anyway, you know. We may as well be risky the fast way. Right. Yes, it's risk anyway, you know. We may as well be risking the fast way. Right. Yes, it's real piercing, that voice. This is my least favourite of the noddies.

Not going to lie, it hits you right in your soul, doesn't it? I'll see what happens tomorrow morning. It reminds me of my first husband. Anyways. I was thinking I was going to have to keep it up until we left the very women because otherwise I'm going to get sussed. But, I mean, if it's annoying you, I can stop it. Well, man, if you do, you're not in.

It's fine. Look, you live your life. Is this all right? Yes. So she wants us to help free her beloved boyfriend or partner. Did you get the name of the partner, by the way? Well, I wanted to chat to the two of you beforehand. Oh, yes.

I'm just curious. But we're happy to help her out, yes, because I don't know how to get through the forest. I don't know how to get through the forest, but we do have a bit of a timeline. So do we know how long this little side quest will take, as it were? I'm not sure. She said she can get us through the forest very quickly once we do it. So if we're quick, if we're lickety-split about it, then we can be lickety-split about getting through this forest.

All right, then. I think, I mean, why not? These people seem like a lovely bunch. They seem like very, very lovely ladies, yes, absolutely. If they're going to fight by us, then you know what? They are cause worth fighting and dying for. One of my ideals. Gotcha.

I'll shuffle my way up. You carry on dancing. No need to. You're all right. Then we'll just keep on dancing. I'll just have a boogie. You just yell us out when you need, all right? What's the wine like?

It's quite nice. Good. I imagine it's very fruity. The priestess or the friar has amazing wine. Oh, that's lovely. So, look, we're very happy to help you. Absolutely. If we can get it done sort of quick smart because we are on a timeline, yes.

If you wish to gather your people, I will gather mine, and we will go through the plans post-test. All right. I'll give the two of you a wave with my walking stick. So we just... So I guess we should just stop dancing then and there. Never mind then, I'll just stop myself mid-boogie. Here we go.

Sorry to give you boogie blue balls. Sorry dearie. Boogie blue balls on the way to boogie fucking blue beach. That's fine. Alright, so here's the plan. Now, we have Sorry, dearie. Boogie bluebells on the way to Boogie fucking Blue Beach. That's fun. All right. So here's the plan. Now, we have procured the uniforms of several of the sheriff's men. You will have to dress as them.

We cannot do this because they know our faces. So the second no uniform will possibly conceal us. You must sneak your way into the castle. Meanwhile, we will create a distraction. There is to be today an archery tournament. Oh, and you're very good at archery, are you? I like to think I know a couple of things, yes. Oh, yes.

Can you give us maybe, I know we're in a bit of a hurry, but I'd love a demonstration. Not at the moment, unfortunately. I was going to put an apple in my head. Perhaps I could finish the plan. Then maybe I will shoot an apple from your head. That's absolutely wonderful. That's a dream.

At the archery tournament, they are expecting me to come and show myself such that they think they will be clever and arrest me. This will not happen. I will both win the tournament and escape. She seems quite cocksure of herself. So I'm good. And when this is happening, we are too. While they are distracted, you will, under the cover of your uniforms, sneak your way into the castle and into the sheriff's room itself. Within the room is

where we believe my beloved to be kept, my beloved Gentleman Marty. Gentleman Marty. Fucking. I mean, sure. You just look so happy with yourself I am pretty

looking at the face of a chuffed boy fuck I'm so pleased where were we yes you would tell him that I have sent you and he should become

cooperative you will sneak your way out with him hopefully there will be no need for any altercations and no need for a fight and he should become cooperative. You will sneak your way out with him. Hopefully, there will be no need for any altercations and no need for a fight, but I must warn you that you should be prepared for one. All right. I'm always ready to come to plans if such a thing is necessary.

She gives you a quick guide where you'll need to go. There'll be the initial drawbridge and portcullis that you'll need to get through. There'll be a security checkpoint there where a couple guards will stop you. They don't know if there's going to be a code phrase or anything like that. Roberta just says hopefully you can talk your way through it.

But if need be, no one's going to be watching these two guards. There's not enough people to man the castle right now. Or there won't be when Roberta exclaims that they'll need every available man to catch me fuck you're good roberta um yeah so it's unlikely that they're going to be anyone there to stop you other than those two guards once you get through there you'll be in the courtyard that'll just be like there might be a stable hand there but that'll be the most of it

past that you get into the keep. She tells you, you know, left turn, right turn, up the stairs, down, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And once you've gotten the gentleman, you will just need to make your way back out. And at that point, when you're coming outside, if you haven't neutralized the guards on the way in, they're definitely going to ask questions. But other than that, there should be basically no one but the stable hands. Is it like night time currently? No, it's early morning.

Oh, excellent. So we're doing it today. We take out the two guards on the way out. On the way in, we just sort of walk through. You will possibly need to take them out or perhaps find a separate way out. I do not know. I do know you could perhaps climb out and see back, but if you are a poor climber, that might not work.

These old bones struggle to climb in any situation. You can't handle yourself in a fight all night? Oh, yes. Oh, yes, I sure certainly can. I've whipped a whippersnapper or two. I feel a little uncomfortable about asking the elderly to do my dirty work for me. Oh, look, it's no trouble, dearie. I'm very happy to help.

You seem like a lovely sort. Kind of like a Griffith would love. Griffith, he thought that, you know, it's a modern day. And, you know, something like this would have really made him very, very happy about the whole situation there. I remember once sitting with Griffith. It would have been about maybe 20 years ago, 30 years ago when he was still with us and we were sitting in the living room and we had recently in the village, there was a brand new blacksmith, a lovely lady, lovely lady

and some people in the town thought because, oh, he is a woman, you know, she's not going to know how to tend to metal but Griffith, not him, he absolutely was under the impression that anybody could do anything and that's, I think, part of the reason that I loved him to the extent that I did, is that he was very sure that anybody come, you know, if you're a gentleman, if you're a woman, you know, even goblins. There were some goblins in a nearby town that... Did you want me to shoot an apple off your head?

Well, you're sorry. I love when an old man talks about her husband. Oh, just that true love just brings... Perhaps we quickly do that and then hurry along to the thing that we need to do right now. Oh, you know what? You don't have to shoot her off my head. I'm just having a bit of fun. It's all right.

Let's just go. You're right. We're in a bit of a hurry. Sorry about that. Let's carry on. Very well, Zen. She leads you through. You're moving through the forest towards the town that she informs you is not too far away.

As you're moving, maybe you have a brief conversation, and Roberta explains, It is a dreadful worry that the queen is busy with her crusades to reunite the king. Such that she cannot bother herself. The queen is out uniting the crusade. What? She is on a crusade to unite our kingdom. Is she? Ruby Chankando, you asked me

about it when we arrived. Alright, I didn't know she was the way. She's not. Oh, she's busy. I guess she is busy. Not necessarily a wife. What queens aren't busy though Oh you're back I'm so allergic to mead I didn't realise there was honey in it

It's wrecked my vocal cords I've got a very serious condition I'd please it if you didn't bring it up No worries We didn't even talk about it I give the eyes Not the sexy eyes the glary eyes to Roberta

alright and then you come to the forest begins to thin and you can see quite obviously what would be the competition and the merriment which is outside the castle in among the city Roberta points that

that is where we will be going. We will wait perhaps an hour to reveal ourselves. At that point, that is when you want to be entering the castle. That should give you enough time to get around to where you need to be. We will try to buy you as much time as possible.

Once you get my beloved Marty, you must bring him back to our camp if you cannot remember the way hopefully he remembers the way and we will re-go there sounds like a lovely plan look at his split

alright then we've already dressed into our surf car on the way you were getting changed old man he looks amazing exactly the kind of thing you'd expect a god to be just an old nano Yeah, you're on the way. You were getting changed. Old man, he looks amazing. Yeah, no, this is exactly the kind of thing you'd expect a god to be. Just an old nana. Roberta,

a very serious expression comes over Roberta's face. For love for the queen. Everyone of her merry women repeats the line. I'll repeat it along with you. For love for the queen. For love for the queen, yes. Alright, repeats the line. I'll repeat it along the way. For love and for the queen. For love and for the queen.

Yes. All right. Separate. Cool. You guys start making your way around the edge of town towards the Moten Bailey, I believe it's referred to. Just a small little castle. Cool. Dealing.

Out the front, there's like a moat, which, you know, has a wall around it. And the portcullis is open and the drawbridge is down. It takes you about an hour to get here, so you reckon as soon as you get there you might as well just... You can dive on in. You see the two guards standing out front. Both of them are wearing uniforms

similar to yours and both of them have halberds at their side. They seem quite relaxed. Alright then, so we just... The plan is to knock them out now or knock them out on the way back? I say if we take them out now, then they're no longer a trouble for us. That's true. There's no one really around in the street. If we take them out later on, then we can just run if things get hairy.

That's true. I say we just bluff our way through and hope that all works out. I think that's probably the best. But what if they hear sounds of struggle? Ah, well. They are guards. They are required to. That is if they hear sounds of struggle? Ah, well. They are guards. They are required to. That is what they're trying to listen for.

Well, we have to hope that this gentleman Marty just keeps to himself upstairs. Were we to expect other guards around gentleman Marty? No, you were told that these two guards should hopefully be the only two you need to deal with. This will be the only one. So we should be fine. We'll just head in. Should hopefully. Should hopefully.

Should hopefully. I hopefully. Should hopefully. I'm sorry we can't all be as confident as these. Are you, like, getting another persona as we speak? Hopefully, hopefully. Hello, it's me. Still naughty, but with a different voice. Naughty, but more of an island naughty. I go over and I cop one on the head.

Classic naughty. I wish I could do that voice. I didn't say words. I'm a big knight. Random naughty. That's not too bad. For me, a lot of it is not moving my lips when I talk. I like when you do a Lana Del Rey impersonation.

If you don't move your mouth, you sound like her. Perfect. That's exactly what. That's it. This is not Lana Del Rey, sounds like. It's me, Lana Del Rey. As you approach, the guards cross their halberds, and one

of them shouts, Halt! Who goes there? Just some other guards going to check on the prisoner. Prisoner? There's no prisoners here. Well, you've been lied to then. There are indeed prisoners here. We've got word from the sheriff.

Sheriff of Normandy says there's prisoners in here, so if you don't know them, maybe it's just above your pay grade. The two guards look at each other. Who are you? Just give them fake names. My name is Geraldine Grapes. And I'm

Merchant. And I'm Merchant of Grapefurs. I'm Brand merchant. And I'm merchant of Great Perth. I'm a brandy brobs. Brandy brobs is a great name. Thank you. What a good speech impediment.

Yes, Adam? Can I try and guess what i think has happened here maybe i'm far off but if one of the guys if the guards believe at least one of us the situation is really weird yeah like well obviously that's brandy brups but who are these other people? That's mysterious. The guard looks at you and says, I knew Merchant. He's been dead for hundreds of years. That's a very confusing statement from a human.

Yes, he might have been dead, but he's a good friend of mine. I know a Merchant. He's dead, though. Yes, yes, yes. Different Merchant. Come on, now. There's so many of us. Anyway, what I was trying to say is, my name is Jacob Glass. Yes, yes, yes Different merchant, come on now There's so many of us Look, it's more of my profession Anyway, what I was trying to say is My name is Jacob Glass

You're kind of standing next to each other right now All three of you, and them too My name's Jacob Glass I'm so sorry, I mean Jacqueline Grass Glass I smile Fellas? Please, my friend, my colleague here,

has got a rare, rare, rare, rare problem. His game constantly changing personalities and identities is rather annoying, but we try not to bring it up around you people, but I guess we're going to have to now, and you're going to have to live with that. You're making a very social faux pas. A very social faux pas. A very social faux pas.

You're under arrest. Oh, crap. I'll just jam him with my water. Smack him with my hand. Non-lethal. Here we go. Well, we tried. We did our absolute best and it just wasn't good enough.

Now I've got to kill people. No, no, we don't have to kill them. We've just got to incapacitate them. Yes, well, whatever it takes. Will our heroes be able to save Gentleman Marty? Find out next time on The Last Queen of Blue Beach, a D&D is for Nerds adventure. Thanks for listening.

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