D&D is For Nerds - Vampire Infested Barovia I #8 Healing Waters

Episode Date: November 5, 2022

The party try their best to not attract werewolves. Pip attempts to hunt for fresh meat but gets upstaged by A'Gogash while Hecktor hears arguments if he is or is not the chosen one and then wanders out into a lake.Want ad-free and even more bonus content? Just check out the Imagination Adventures show page on Apple podcasts! Music by the ever wonderful Lepidora, you can check out her music here. And head to peddlerspress.store to peruse our D&D themed merch store and help support the show! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ahem. You're listening to the Sandspants Network. Although you see no water for miles around, we are nevertheless marooned, stranded in this place called Barovia. To change metaphors, we are imprisoned. The mist that surrounds us are prison bars, and Baron Strahd von Zarovich our warden.

I have known many evil men such as him, and if fate is to be believed, I will know many after. Hector, in the night, you dream. It's as if this dream travels on directly from your previous one. You have turned and you can see the light getting bigger and bigger and bigger. And the figure within gets closer and closer and closer. I will save us. You wake up. Did I get any vision of who they were, like an outline or a shape or like even a direction to be pulled into? No, it was a very it

was a very kind of generic outline of just humanoid figure you did however when they said i will save us it sounded almost a little there was there were many emotions contained within it contained multitudes oh and within those multitudes the primary emotions that you felt were determination, love for life, love for life in general, and a slight hint of fear. Over breakfast, if we're having breakfast, I'll ask, because Pip, you're the one that knows more about it. You've been around here longer. I'm eating a sausage. Sure. It's funny with a dragonborn snout.

You're going to hold the sausage so much further in front of your face. Yes, go on. Pip, you seemed surprised that I had divine magic in connection to my deity. It gets cut off pretty much the moment you arrive in here. It's a little chunk of gothic bullshit in a terrible terrible but when it cuts off you know access to the outside world that's both spiritual divine as well as physical so yes i was i was shocked right well i i guess i do have something to confess is that i too have been cut off from my deity. Oh, but you can't, well, you say that to me.

But I have seen you cast divine magic. Something else come to me. I've had a vision. It's not my deity, but there's something here in Barovia. Do they seem positive? Because that sounds like the kind of thing that could be very negative. positive? Because that sounds like the kind of thing that could be very negative. You know, the human

mind is a bit like a hermit crab's shell and when one crab leaves it, another one will often find its home. So are they positive? Maybe I've got the sausage half-eaten in front of my face a little bit, Pat. They are a positive force. I want to conjure up

more divine energy and then just kind of hold it in my hand and then just kind of snuff it out. Okay, well, if it feels good. It still feels like there's a connection. It still feels similar. Not the same, but similar. I've heard of stuff like this before, yeah?

What do you mean? Like people retaining their divine magic. As I said previously, you've heard? Yeah, but I've never seen it. This is the first time I've seen it. I finished the sausage. I thought maybe it was to do with the abbot when I heard that there was an angel.

Lushen speaks. Not, yes. He says, I think it is possible that you have found a connection to some divine entity within Barovia. He gestures with the right arm and the left arm moves a little bit, but Gorob quite clearly is forcing it back down on the table. Yes, good insight.

The divine spark exists in all places. It is hard, hard to remove entirely. Well, there are two gods. Well, there's two gods in Barovia, yeah, that I'm aware of. The morning lord and the night father? The night dad. Night daddy. So there is the morning lord.

A lot of people do worship Strahd, thinking him to be some sort of deity. That's why I was a little concerned. Druids, for example, worship Strahd. And you apparently have encountered some sort of werewolf deity. That is true. We have. If you'll recall. Yeah, we did too.

But apart from that, well, yeah, and I would say probably having spent enough time in the lands of Barovia, Pip, you know there's like a myriad of different, like, lesser beings. Folk gods, basically, yeah. But sort of, they fill more of a warlock's patron sort of role rather than that of a proper deity. And you have not known a single one of them to be something pleasant. The Morning Lord's pretty much the only thing that fills that particular role in Barovia that's anything close to good, yeah? Some clerics, like the ones in Valakai and at some point in time, the one in Barovia, were able to derive magic from this connection. Okay.

But you never saw it. You only heard that this happened. But it seemed, it came with enough, like enough people were saying, enough consistent stories that you're like, well, they're getting their magic from somewhere. Well, the only good god, saying quotation marks, because who knows, is a being known as

the Morning Lord, but I kind of was under the impression it was, well, not genuine. Lushund speaks again. I know of the Morning Lord. Well, here you go. Didn't you just arrive a day ago? Lushund's again. I know of the morning, lord. Oh, here you go. Didn't you just arrive a day ago? Lushund's got you back. I have researched a great many things. As wizard supreme

of the dwarven, Gorob shoves his two fingers right down Lushund's open throat, forcing Lushund to vomit at the table. That's an awesome move. Gorob laughs. Gorob laughs very loudly until Lushen, staring daggers at him,

shoves the other hump down. No, don't do that. What the hell are you two doing? Oh my god. They both vomit onto the table. I stand up back away. Elf Christ Almighty. Agogash, could you please grab them

and just take them outside and wash them off in a trough? Agogash gingerly picks them up. Such mutually assured destruction. That's the most frustrating part about it. No one comes out on top. If you vomit. That is disgusting. It's the same fucking body.

Anyway, it's probably the, I mean, let's hope because any alternative is. I'm ignoring. His girl puts Knife and fork down in disgust We've all just stopped eating Oh, Pyrrhon's also here, of course Pyrrhon has rejoined you Nice to see you What can you tell me about the Morning Lord? Well, what do I know?

About the Morning Lord? The Morning Lord doesn't have really a lot of specifics for you. You just kind of know him as another one of the many superstitions that the Barovians have. Maybe one with a little bit more weight, that's all. Like maybe one that people build churches to, as opposed to... And good churches. Well, actually, one thing you would know is that the Morning Lord predates Barovia being isolated.

Oh, okay. Yeah. The Morning Lord is maybe one of the oldest of the divine beings in Barovia being isolated. Oh, okay. Yeah. The Morning Lord is maybe one of the oldest of the divine beings in Barovia. The only divine being in Barovia. Maybe one of the oldest of the, I don't know what you'd call them. I suppose gods.

Deities is also. Yeah, deities in the land. The Burja Master steps in as Gorob and Lashana are being gingerly carried out. Sorry about the sick up. Yeah, so sorry about our dwarves. You speak of the Morning Lord? Yes, I'm curious to what, anything about him?

He is a local deity of sorts. Saint Markovia worshipped him. The last time anyone of great power was able to divine energies from the Morning Lord. There is a shrine to him here in Krezik. It sits over by the lake. Perhaps it's worth visiting, I assume. Yes, perhaps I would like to see that before we deal with the werewolves.

It was said that before Barovia was plunged to where it is now, that the Morning Lord was the sun itself, but he gestures up. You know, when he says, you're inside, so you can't see it, but when he gestures up, you know, Barovia is shrouded in such a perpetual, eternal mist that even during the daytime,

you actually can't see the sun. Yeah, I sort of imagine it's permanently overcast. Yeah, pretty much, yeah. It's like the city of forks, if you will. Yeah, from Twilight. From Twilight time. Oh, yes, yes. In many ways.

So when he gestures upwards, while you can't actually see the sky, you know what he means when he says, though if the morning lord ever was a thing, his energy no longer properly reaches us. Oh, because I have a connection with something and i again summon some divine energy dimitri seems yeah dimitri seems unimpressed he sits down at the table as if this was pretty natural and he says this is not the first time that i have seen such energies. It is unusual, but I have found that either this will leave in time or it will be revealed that you are drawing your energy from an unpleasant source. Maybe I clap my hand on your shoulder and I'm like, not the chosen one.

Rats. Then I take my plate to the kitchen. Anna, his wife, follows him in and she says, I would not be so certain. Oh. The chosen one, maybe. Dimitri waves a dismissive hand at his wife. And she says, no, no. You know better than us.

She sits down on the other side of him and says, the Morning Lord, he is weak. But he is real. He lives here. And my husband is real. He lives here and my husband is correct that Strahd and other agents around this place wish to corrupt the good. The abbot is a

prime example of this, but something fuels the clerics in Barovia and in Valachai, and it is not evil. It is benevolent. There is help for those who search. Thank you very much. If you could direct us to where this statue is.

Dimitri nods, and he gives you directions. It's in the north end of town by the lake. You won't be able to miss it. The description of the Morning Lord, they're not really ringing true. The presence that I've felt is, again, it's more like a female voice. Yeah.

So this is like. They seem to be describing the Morning Lord as male. Yeah. Your identification of the Morning Lord is female. And like the gnomes in Pena, the religion that I'm from, they have different deities, correct? They've got like a male figurehead and a female figurehead, correct? Yeah. Correct. They've got a male figurehead and a female figurehead, correct? Yeah. Gnomes and penia specifically, gnomes being the father and penia being the mother,

are seen as not literally mother and father, but fill a mother and father figure of the pantheon where they have certain roles within the pantheon, where one of them might teach and the other might heal. Although they sometimes, depending on your interpretation, switch these roles. I guess during that conversation about the Mourning Lord, maybe try to ask questions. And so here's the patriarch of the Mourning Lord. Is there a matriarch of that pantheon? The Mourning Lord is just the Mourning Lord. Oh, right. There's no patriarch and matriarch.

No. The Mourning Lord is a deity of themselves. And there is any, like, say, davers or anything like that? No, no angels or minor powers or anything like that. It's just the Morning Lord and those who follow. Thank you very much. I appreciate that. Seeing what everyone else wants to do, but if no one else has any further...

Piran will come. You can see Piran was, when they were talking about superstitions of the Morning Lord and whatnot, Piran was like listening intently. And if you make a move to go see the shrine, Piran says, Oh, look, I don't think any sort of Morning Lord is going to be interested in a prayer from me, but I would be keen to see what they say to you. Of course. A go-gash is probably going to sit this one out, because

Gorob and Lashon need to be managed. Someone needs to be managed. Who knows what they'll do otherwise. Esmeralda has picked up a bunch of books from the Abbey, and she's going to go through them. I might join Esmeralda. Me and Pyrrhon will head off. I really like Gnomes and Pannier. It's such a good expletive. Gnomes and pannier. It's such a good expletive.

Gnomes and pannier. The purr of the pannier. It's good as like a holy shit, but it's also good as a god damn it. Yeah. Gnomes and pannier. Gnomes and pannier. Look at that. It's great. It's a good mix. You head north towards

the pool. On the way there, I'll ask Perrin, what did you find anything during the night? And I'll fill him on what we also did. Had a little look around town. There doesn't appear to be much in the way of features, I suppose. The town is they have no market square.

They have no tavern or anything like that. It's almost suspicious. They mentioned they had no tavern. I have seen this sort of stuff before, though. There are parts of Bull Ridge, the town, used to be part of Goldcrest when Goldcrest was a thing. But the town of Bull Ridge had kind of like an adventurer square where all the adventurers would come through.

And that part had your taverns and your inns and your market squares and whatnot. But the other wings of Bull Ridge kind of operated independently of the rest of the town and they operated as what you might describe as like a commune

where people just kind of did what needed to be done and everyone looked after each other. It appears that is the same for Kresok. Yeah, right. So they just have, perhaps over here, there's some farmlands over here.

Everyone sort of comes to the... Yes, everyone kind of just has their own little garden and look after themselves, and then anything, it's frankly disgusting. Anything that they have extra, they give. Ah, yes. Piran says, that's obviously a joke from Piran. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He doesn't genuinely find that disgusting.

But you can see that he's... There's an element of truth to it. Yeah, he's like a little bit like, meh, these silly people. They don't even know how the world works. Look, hey, it's not the system I am used to, but it works for them, I suppose. Nor I.

And I guess it is working. Apart from that, the Burj Master has very little in the way of thievable objects. There is a little, what do you call it, like a family plot out the back. But I don't know anything that you don't know now. Yeah. Well, thank you for your, I guess, information gathering. Hopefully we can get out of this one yet. You reach the pool.

Even under grey skies, this place at the north end of the village shimmers and sparkles. Near its shore sits an old gazebo on the verge of collapse. A wooden statue of a mournful bare-chested man, its paint chipped and faded,

stands in the gazebo with arms outstretched as though waiting to be embraced. Walk up to the gazebo? Mm-hmm. Is there anything like a plaque there or anything like that to read? There is a little inscription beneath the carving of the man that says, Morning, Lord, may his rays shine upon us. I'll use a divine sense to sort of see what is around,

to see if it's like, you know, consecrated ground, anything like that. Yeah, this gazebo is revealed to you as consecrated ground. It would appear that this place, this gazebo, evil cannot step within it. It's the safest place in all Borovia is a random gazebo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pyrrhon shifts. Pyrrhon imitates, not imitates, but Pyrrhon inadvertently imitates Esmeralda and shifts from one foot to the other and says, I don't like it here.

I understand why. I step forward in front of the statue. Would I have picked up any sort of like, I guess like prayer ceremonies or is it a kind of thing where I'm like, well, I need to kneel, I need to general reflect, I need to. About the morning Lord? Yeah. No, you, well, no, Dimitri and Anna both don't know any proper rites. They maybe know a prayer, like the equivalent of the, like the Catholic Lord's prayer or whatever.

Like the, the one that you just commonly say. They maybe know a short equivalent of that that they could have taught you. So you can say that if you want. Yeah, I guess I will. Because I would kneel before the statue and close my eyes and I would, yeah, say the prayer. As part of the prayer, you offer an oath

and there's a customizable portion where you're basically making a promise to do something in exchange for the morning lord's protection what would you make as a promise oh they dimitri and anna say that they don't know what is customary to make as a promise and if either one of them have ever said the prayer dimitri probably gives you a very dismissive, like he will probably promise something that seems correct, but he's not really thinking about it. Anna probably gives it a little bit more thought.

She doesn't know that this is what you do, that she doesn't know that this is correct. But the examples that she gives are things like a sacrifice of herself, like physically, like she would sacrifice her sight or her hearing or something like that. All right. That seems a bit on the extreme side.

So it's a morning light. It's about sun. It's about, I promise to shed light on the darkest places of this place and bring forth the light out of that darkness. Nothing happens.

The place has a sense of peace, though. So while nothing happens, you nonetheless, when you finish the prayer, you feel like this place is pleasant. Right. Well, I guess no conversations for me. Now, the gazebo is in a bit of disrepair, yeah? Yeah. Yeah.

Is there anything like trees around or anything like that that I could easily just, well. Going to do up the gazebo? Do up the gazebo. It just seems nice to do, but that does seem like a day's work. That's a lot. That's a lot. Probably more than a day's work, if I'm being honest. That seems like a lot of effort just to do something nice.

In an era before the power saw, it's probably more than a day's effort. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, I look around the lake. I look around as in like to not like – I'm not searching the lake. I'm diving in. Yeah, you're not investigating.

You're just enjoying. Yeah, I sort of stand up. I look around if there's any kind of anything out of the ordinary, if there's any sort of something that might spark an interest. sort of something that might spark an interest. And I'm like, well, it's nice to look at the visage or the outline of the morning lord and just kind of compare it in my mind's eye of the vision before in my dreams to be like, right, this is not.

As you approach the water, on one of the gentle banks as the water laps against the sands, kneeling down, you dip your hand into the water, and as you pull it out, you feel a tingling sensation. As the water runs between your fingers and falls back, you realize that this

entire pool is holy water. Could holy water do anything for a werewolf bite? Holy water can't But such a powerful presence blessing all of this water Must have something beyond just the capacity to create holy water There is powerful divine magic happening here

Okay, Pyrrhon, let's go back Certainly, he says What's wrong with the water? He reaches down to touch it. Ah! No, that doesn't happen. No, no, no, no, no. Just kidding. He's not that evil.

Just uncomfortable, unconsecrated ground evil. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like what I imagine all tieflings are. Yeah, it just gives him like a little bit of a headache. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a little bit tinnitus, you know? He's got to just like squeeze his eyes closed and then open them a couple times. Nothing's

wrong with it. It's, everything is right with it. We need to go now to the Burgomaster. All right, you rush back to the Burgomaster's mansion. Dimitri is sitting maybe in the opposite the dining room. There's like an office and he's sitting there writing on paper.

Dimitri, do you know anything about the lake? Lake Baratov? What of it? Do you know anything special? Anything about it that is special? It is said to be holy ground. Yes, yes, yes. It is extremely holy ground. Have you ever tried

anyone afflicted using the waters? Why would we do that? Because it's holy ground. Have you ever tried anyone afflicted using the waters? Why would we do that? Because it's holy ground. Well, holy ground just means like consecrated. That does not even mean as the spell. No, no, no, no. It is divine. He slowly stands up.

He is news to me. Where are the children? Gather the children. He rushes out. Within maybe 15 minutes, the children are gathered. We rush to the children. He rushes out. Within maybe 15 minutes, the children are gathered. We rush to the lake. All right. You take them to the lake.

I want to be as open and honest as I can to the burglar and the family. This may not work, and I apologize if it does not. But right now, this is our best hope. Before we continue there, Esmeralda and Pip, you are in maybe one of the upstairs bedrooms. You can see packed away in one corner is a lot of children's stuff, and you're just not focusing on that right now.

Best not to think about it. You and Esmeralda have a bunch of the books splayed out in front of you, and you're just going through them? Yeah. Are you looking for werewolf information? Yeah. You and Esmeralda are going over any information about werewolves.

St. Markovia, when everything happened, when Barovia was sealed away from the rest of the world and became what it is today, there was a werewolf pack that rose up. It is definitely, you are aware now, it is definitely not the same pack that exists today. But you can see St. Markovia documents that Strahd had a hand in the creation and then control of the group and then you and Esmeralda

are able to work through and work out the reason, because Esmeralda's like, I have never known werewolves and wolves are certainly related, but to have... Yes. You are able to work out that Strahd is able,

has some strange control over wolves, direwolves and direst wolves in this land. And he has, he gave them to these previous, as like servants to these previous werewolf clans, and so you were able to do, well, that must mean that the current werewolf clan, Strahd,

has some control. They are in some league with him. This is both troubling but full of opportunity. Well, for you perhaps. It's worrying for me in a couple of different ways. I'd like to also note, she's got an Emmanuel the Monster, yeah?

Yep, a little pocket-sized one. I notice you have a good book as well. She holds it out for you. Is it Dark Places edition? Yeah, it's Dark Places edition. Do you mind? No, please. I proper mind. You check each other's notes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah it's dark places edition i do you mind i like no please i mean i look at my mind you

you check each other's notes yeah yeah yeah yeah opening her pocket-sized one you can see just like you she's ripped to prevent herself from taking psychic damage for reading the book she has written little notes in the margins except you notice that there are two distinct types of notes in the margins. It's two different types of handwriting. One of them is very flowery, cursive language of writing. Sorry, it's obviously written in as plain as common as can be written. Yeah, sure.

But one of the handwritings is very flowery, very cursive. It's like a doctor's handwriting. You can almost barely make it out. And then the other one presumably as morel does is just big block letters i like to imagine that my notes uh all look like they were written with venom like like each one looks like like there'll be little like little i think i have it somewhere in my notes here you know for this there is a no cure. And Pip's just been like, yeah, thanks a bunch, Emmanuel. Real useful information.

As you're reading her one, you see she has made very similar notes to you. Where she's been. You've got to cross out something. You've got to make things clear. Fucking nice. Thank you. Thank you very much. Emmanuel. Glad I, maybe in one of the notations, it's like, glad I had to work this out while I was fighting it.

Yeah, exactly. Why even bring this up? Question mark, question mark, question mark. It's like a dirty paw print of like clearly the beast has stepped on it. A bit of blood splatter. Yeah, absolutely. Between two pages, you've got to peel apart because there's a bit of ooze in there or something. With the flowery cursive language, though, it's an entirely different tone.

This person seems to have infinite patience, which is kind of upsetting in its own right but the cursive language you notice has some extra additional notes here and there obviously things that they have observed and have added to the book second hand i ask and like maybe open it up with one hand and point to the more flowery handwriting with the other the book was given to me by my mentor, Dr. Rudolf van Richten. Oh, I see. I see. I see. I see.

I see. He was a very clever man. I can tell. He's got infinite patience for Emmanuel. Yes. You share a look. Have you ever read any of the other editions of Emmanuel? I saw a plainer version once.

Emmanuel Demonstra Wrong Places Edition? I think that was the name, yeah. Yes, yes, yes. Might have been called Other Places Edition. I'm not sure. Honestly, if there are multiple copies, it wouldn't shock me. But yes, anyway, yeah. It was once owned by him he um she gestures to like one end of the book

and you flip to the beginning the opening forward by emmanuel himself yeah of course and in part on the blank page next to it it's got like a little just in the flowery language just a little inscripted writing saying, to my dearest student, may this serve you well, even though I know you will scream at it. Oh, that's nice. Dr. Richten. Why? You said you're not native to Borovia.

Vistani, we do not come from Borovia. Well, no, you come and go, yes. I mean, I'm assuming the story is the same as everyone else's in this group. You arrived here suddenly, accidentally? She shakes her head. I did, I suppose, arrive quickly, but I would not describe it as suddenly. I came here on purpose. Oh.

Well, that's a nice change. It is not easy to find this place and Strahd did not want to allow me access but he has a much harder time stopping people from getting in than he does stopping people from leaving. And then also I think I was able to confuse the mist by that I am Vistana.

Yeah, yes, I can imagine. But yes, I come here in search of the Doctor. He's here for the same intention? He is here as well, yes. Intentionally? He is also here intentionally, yes. He wishes to slay. He is a monster hunter like us.

Wishes to slay Strahd. Ah, okay. Well, yes. I would help him if I can find him. I'd like, you know, take a little moment, like there's a billion different things I want to say. Well, yeah, good luck to

the two of you. I hope we can find him for you. This is not a lot of... I don't believe the words I'm saying. She's too engrossed in the books to really be paying attention. She gives you like a thumbs up, but she's kind of staring at the book she's looking at I'll give her a thumbs up as well and then I'll go back to reading

You hear some commotion downstairs Well, I mean like I'm kind of reading But mostly because I don't want to go out and look at a shrine So, well, I'll close the book Let's see what that is I will be down shortly, she says Give her a thumbs up. You go downstairs, and you see that the children from yesterday

are being gathered in the Burja Master's mansion. I look between all the faces. What are we doing? What? The lake, it is divine. It is concentrated ground. It has a direct connection to divine magic. I heard that there was some kind of healing lake,

but obviously I've never been in the walls. So, look, this is not a guarantee. It is not a promise of curing the afflictions, but it is something, and it might work. Might as well give it a go. Yes, I say with a lot more optimism. Might as well give it a go. Yes, I say with a lot more optimism.

The two of you, plus several of the town guard, plus Dimitri, plus Anna, and then all of the kids' parents, and then the kids, and then anyone else who wants to come. I mean, it's not much happens in this town, so it must be exciting. Any commotion. Well, actually, I make a joke, but yeah, it looks like the entire town has turned out at the lake. Piran refuses to go into the gazebo. Fair enough. Gorob, Lushan, and that's just assumed with Gorob's there, Lushan is,

and Agogosh are also there. They're surprisingly, for once, quiet up the back. Oh, that's nice to hear. But yeah, so all of the kids are at the bank of the pool. Adam, I guess I'm performing a baptism. Yeah, I know. I kept thinking that.

That's very funny. You stand in the waters. You take the first child and you briefly dunk them under the water should wear a muddy crown. Good lord, show me the way. You take the first child and you briefly dunk them under the water and then bring them back up. The kid pants very heavily and then slowly wades

out of the water. Can I check them? Yeah. Because I'm sure that's something I'd be able to tell. Pip, you inspect the wound and you can see that any trace of the lycanthropy disease has been removed from this child. I'll give you a thumbs up from the shore. The entire crowd erupts into cheers. Yeah, holding back maybe tears.

Just, you know, I would be praying, I guess, to the morning Lord. This is their place. So each child offering that prayer, offering that once more, bringing in the light into the darkness and bringing everything forth and just dunk, next one, dunk, next one, dunk. All seven are cured of lycanthropy. I just have to be silent.

I'm just very happy with the situation and I guess overcome that we've got to win. As you're standing there, Dimitri wades into the water with you, brings you into like a big bear hug and says into your ear, this is perhaps the first win we have ever had. I like to think I'm on the shore and maybe a little Pip's fighting every inch of it, but a little tear starts to come out of the

corner of his mouth. But Pip's not looking at the kids. Pip's looking at Hector. And Pip is feeling hope and is terrified of it. And then also Pip's also thinking, I've got to bottle some of this lake. Well, actually, it's funny you should say that. As Hector, as you leave the waters,

you can feel an energy within them become fatigued and then recede. So, Dimitri, I feel that this is something that can only be done once in a while. I think it needs time. Once in a while is more than we had

previously, he says. I'm so happy that the affliction is gone. I think it is time to go and hunt some werewolves. Dimitri looks you in the eye and says, you are always welcome within these walls. Thank you, Dimitri. What's the plan now?

I'll go over to our ragtag group. Purin steps forward and says, hell of a thing. That was incredible. I've never seen a miracle before. I've seen the opposite. Isn't that just a tragedy? But I feel like this bears good omen.

I feel like this is, we've got some groundswell going here. I think so. You're a very superstitious man. I like to think I have some of the water collected. Fuck, Pyrrhon does as well. Why would you not? I'm probably putting like three vials.

This link's paying out. We're making some souvenirs. This will be a holiday. This will be where we talk to the town for years. I'm excited later to be bit by a vampire and be like, it's going to be fine. Look, look, look. This is just Lakewater. Maybe the be like, it's going to be fine. Look, look, look. This is just Lake.

Maybe the other one. What's going on? I've been scammed. Scammed by the lake. Piran, you also see Piran bottles like a teeny, he genuinely does. He bottles like a teeny tiny amount in a pendant that he wears around his neck. It's not enough to drink as a potion. You think he's literally just doing it as like a... Superstition. Yeah.

Well, we did promise to deal with the werewolf problem. Absolutely. I mean, that's still the sort of overarching aim here. We've got the job half done. And I think... A gogosh nods. It would be poor form on our part to not follow through. Yes.

So I think we should gather whoever wants to do that and let's go deal with some werewolves. On your way to pick up... Oh, are you leaving today? I would say, yes. Why not? On your way to pick up Esmeralda, a Gogosh needs to break up, metaphorically, not literally,

needs to break up Lushan and Gorob because they're holding each other's noses. I love those guys. I just feel bringing them to the werewolf den is going to be problematic. It's going to be great, yeah. We can leave them here. They don't have to come with us.

No, no. The second you talk about werewolves, both of them, for the first time since you've met them, both of them leap and their body works in unison as they put their dukes up do a kind of like a shadow boxing sort of stance and say

Let us at them! Let us at them! The vile creatures that forced us like this! At least they've got something to direct their anger. Nobody wanted to try stealth the first time anyway, so... Fair. What harm can they be, really?

Let's go see if Esmeralda wants to come and finish that job, or if she's... If anyone could be more excited about it, Esmeralda... Nose deep in that book. Okay, you packed it up. There we go. Are we going to kill? The werewolves. Oh yeah, that too.

Yes. You drew away half of them yesterday, correct? No, they went on a hunting mission. Right, right, right. That was six of them? Yes. Yes, I believe I saw six. Roughly 12.

And I believe there are 12 in total. We killed... One, two, three, four. Yeah, so there would be, what, about eight? Right. Give or take. Give or take. Maybe some of them have gone on the hunt.

Do you want to try your tactic again there, Pip, of drawing them out? I much prefer the idea of fighting them in an open area rather than a tight little cave. Well, yes. Now when they have returned back to their cave, they will have seen the children taken. I don't suppose they'll be happy about that. If all the werewolves are slain, and I like maybe catch Esmeralda's eye, probably going to alert Strahd.

It will put us on his map. So that would be an added bonus. I think we've... That was good to watch. Well, I mean, we've already killed the abbot, and the abbot had a connection to Strahd.

So perhaps it would... If Strahd needs to visit him, I think it will take a little while for Strahd to find out. Of course, of course. Oh, shit, the Bellevue's are in trouble. Well, we should probably do something there. Maybe we can ask the Burggomaster to get them back. Let's deal with the werewolf problem.

Yes, yes, yes. And then when the burgomaster is even more ingratiated. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Saying, saying, chucking to the wall to see what sticks, basically. Just saying it out loud as we were heading out towards the werewolves. So the trap again. I guess we should hunt a deer. Yes. werewolves. So the trap again, I guess we should hunt a... Yes, if we hunt a deer

and we place it within their hunting range, Esmeralda, perhaps you'll have a good idea of where that might be. Then that should attract them out. It'll be irresistible to them. It might attract all of them, but I sort of assume that's our plan at the moment. Yes.

Everyone gives a nod. So yes, raw meat, hung, would be the perfect bait. Some of us in the woods, well, all of us in the woods, but perhaps, you know, arranged strategically. And, yes. And then when they're here, eradicate them. Just before midday, as you leave the town of Krezik, somewhere distantly on a grassy hill there is

Pip's shack. Near the shack, barely audible to any except those incredibly close, a roar can be heard. It is a warning noise to the pack of diarist

wolves slowly stalking around. A bit of a rumbling and then a crashing noise and one of the diarist wolves slowly stalking around a bit of a rumbling and then a crashing noise and one of the diarist wolves leaves the open shack door they shake their head at boris oh my god who now knowing that the shack is clear turns to the only nearest walled settlement, Krezik. His target is clear. Alright, you gonna go hunting? Yeah. Am I gonna embarrass myself in front of a go-gosh again?

Oh no. Oh no. Could we have helped? That's even more embarrassing. Well, you can hunt on your own if you want. I don't know. Pip, what would you have been hunt on your own if you want I don't know Pip what would you have been hunting on your own we only need one corpse

of something like a boar or a deer that'll draw them out pretty much instantly would you like to help Pip if he I don't want to impose on him and I just want to vibe it out. Was he asking?

Well, vibing it out is kind of rolling for it. I'll vibe it out. All right. Just letting you know. As in, I want to vibe out Pip. All right. Just letting you know, if you fail this check by more than five, you vibe it out in the wrong way, and you actually make it even worse.

Okay. Are you okay with that? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm here to help. So? Yep. You vibe it out pretty poorly. Ah.

Okay. I think he wants my help. You not only think that Pip wants your help, you fuck up helping him. And Pip, who would normally have failed this, just does absolutely horrendously. Pip, you are just having trouble finding anything's tracks whatsoever. You're searching in the underbrush and you genuinely cannot find trace of any animal

in these woods right now. Perhaps, Hector, if you stopped doing deer calls. Ew. But it's significantly worse than that. Oh, no. Hector, without telling no Hector puts you on without telling anyone else puts you on to a set of tracks I think that is a deer track

okay you start following said set of deer tracks Pyrrhon stops you after about half an hour and says are these deer tracks or are they our tracks like from my crouched position on the ground turning my head

up to look at it. No one would you heard Hector's advice? Everyone thinks this was you. Like looking at the tracks, looking at Perrin's cloven feet. I appear to have made a mistake.

A gogash walks out of the underbrush with a boar slung over his shoulder. I have gotten food for us and extra for a trap. Oh, thank you. Who wishes to have a meat lunch, he says. It's so embarrassing. It's been a long time since we've had anything other to eat than...

No, we had a lovely meal at the... Have you been doing calisthenics exercise? I just see that you have been making laps. Is this a perhaps warm-up for the fight upcoming? I was... Yes. Yes. Esmeralda stifles a laugh.

She is loving it. It's hard for, obviously as a dragonborn, I don't have any hair. So, but if I did, it would be frazzled from running my hands through it. It's okay, Pip. We all have our bad days. Oh, it makes it even worse. Gogash has prepared already, prepared some food for you. So you all have a meat sandwich

basically. Yes. Where's the bread coming from? He had bread. Oh, okay. I thought a meat sandwich. He hunted it. You got enough of a bread tree. What are you talking about? I thought a meat sandwich was a nice way of saying we just ate some meat. Meat, meat, and then meat. No, he had some bread with it.

Okay, that's nice. Probably some mountain bread equivalent, something that Lambus would have. It's slightly bloody. You don't want to know where it came from. Out of an elf. Lambus is harvested from elves. Yes, that's correct. The making of traps, like the creation of a bear trap or something like that,

what goes into that? Is that something I could do on the fly? Could I have bear traps within my shack? I'd say that you could start with a certain number of traps, sure. All right. Let's call it two. All right. I'll just make them bear traps because that's pretty easy to,

like it's hard to, I can't think of any other traps snare oh yeah but is a snare going to be useful, alright we'll go bear trap and a snare cage trap cage yeah definitely not big enough for a werewolf you can go with two bear

I'm just listing traps for you and now I realise after snare that's where I end, that's the end of traps alright I realize after Snare, that's where I end. That's the end of traps. All right. Well, do we have time? What's the time? At this point, it will be midday.

Well, no, you've had lunch, so it's one. I say we string the meat up from a tree, dangling, and then we hide a bear trap. I'll return to the shack to retrieve it. We hide a bear trap beneath it under some underbrush. We wait in. Esmeralda interrupts. Do you hear that?

I listen. Pip? Hector, unfortunately, you are not a practiced woodsman, and so you do not know what you are listening for. You can't hear anything. The rustling of the trees, the birds chirping. I'm like, oh, yeah, it's a beautiful day. Straight up, Esmeralda, I hear you.

You know what Esmeralda is talking about. You can't hear anything. There is no birds. There is no rustling nearby. Something has scared away all the natural wildlife. Can I hear any kind of movement? No. Which, you kind of know what that means.

It means that wherever they are, they're probably watching and standing still. I'd like to maybe gesture with my arms for everybody to bunch up back to back because I'm assuming that we're possibly surrounded right now. Esmeralda kind of understands what you mean, nods, and moves to form the circle with you. And anyone standing near her also moves. Piran seems like a little bit perturbed by the two of you Agogash doesn't understand

exactly what you're talking about but understands the idea of what you're trying to convey Lushan and Gorob the semicircle the circle is not completed they're arguing Yeah

I assume they have been arguing Form the circle you idiot You fool You dumb Lushan tries to slap Gorob But Gorob moves his head And Lushan slaps his own head And then six werewolves explode from all around you

Perhaps we weren't as quiet as we should have been. I was like, could you two please just be very quiet? And that's my actions. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. My action before they come out is wishing desperately I was by myself. I'd rather handle six werewolves on my own. Hi, I'm Joel Zammett. I'm Jackson Bailey. And I'm Joel Dushett. I'm Jackson Bailey.

And I'm Joel Dusha. And we're the hosts of Baseless Speculation, a podcast where three white and mostly straight friends look at upcoming movies, TV shows, and other pop culture events and baselessly speculate on what we think will happen. But what makes our pop culture podcast different from every other pop culture podcast hosted by three white and mostly straight men? It's simple.

We've employed this guy. With one swift kick to the head, our patented horse allows us to fully appreciate and predict where current pop culture trends will go with surprising accuracy. Just search for baseless speculation wherever you get your podcasts, and you too can listen to the only show where the hosts are guaranteed to be kicked in the horse by a head. Yeah, good stuff!

Yeah, good stuff! I love getting kicked in the horse by a head. Okay, cool. Cool beans. Once again, we've wasted a bunch of meat. Well, maybe that's what attracts it. We probably shouldn't have eaten with all that Probably shouldn't have had to sit down And just slop the meat onto the ground and have a delicious lunch

Mmm Good stuff, alright Fuck yes How do we have the most annoying party In the world It's good Are they I assume in werewolf form, Adam?

Yeah, they're full-on werewolves. Okay. It's Ogogash's turn first. Ogogash rages and charges one of the werewolves. Ogogash's axe slashes through twice, dealing deep, horrible-looking cuts, but both of the cuts almost instantly heal. A go-gash's attack does nothing.

Pip, it's your turn. Cool. All right. I got a bunch of wolfsbane, don't I? I'm going to take this turn to squat down and make a potion. Okay. A potion? Make some kind of goo.

Hang on. Fuck. It's an oil if it goes on a weapon. Okay, I'll make an oil then. Um, okay. Let's go. Let's use one of the angel feathers I got. Sort of crush that up into there. I don't like that you rolled and I don't know if this worked at all.

I know, I know, but I don't like that I what I don't like, Adam, is that I wasn't looking at your face. So I don't know what the expression was when that happened. So let's go, yeah, angel feather, wolf's bane, because angel feather does healing damage, or it does healing, so I'm assuming I can. Oh, yeah, true. I didn't realize you were using it for that as well. And then I'll go, what oil do I have? Adhesive?

Anything that says adhesive? I don't have anything adhesive. Do you want to make a grenade? I guess I'll make a grenade out of my last aquamarine. As you imbibe the angel feathers and the wolfsbane, you said? Yep. Into the aquamarine. Once again, it starts humming.

I have another grenade in my coat. Oh, my God. It starts humming and vibrating. Cool. It's Gorob and Lushen's turn. I'm excited for these two to fight. Someone that's not each other. Gorob begins foaming at the mouth.

Cool. They charge a different one of the werewolves. Gorob attacks and hits. Gorob's attack does nothing. Similar to a Gogash's. Then Lushen with his free hand as Gorub screams

Lushund cries out time to die but will you? One of the werewolves their pupils turn to pinpricks one of the werewolves turns tail and runs. Oh alright. That's good.

I mean it's something. We're going to hunt them down later. It's a later fight, but it's still good. I'd be so scared if one of them raged that they'd split in half. It seems dangerous to rage when you're sewn together. The werewolves get to go. One of the five remaining werewolves makes a gesture, and the other werewolves move to attack. One of the werewolves, the one attacking a gogash, tries to bite at a gogash.

A gogash gets bit. Luckily, because he's raging, he's going to take half damage. So he only takes three points of damage. What does Emmanuel the monster say about healing a werewolf bite? I'm going to guess fucking Bo Diddley. The werewolf that's doing gestures, gestures towards you, Hector, and another one of the werewolves charges you.

Oh, you get bit twice. The werewolf tackles you, lands atop you, and starts savaging you. It's like a bear attack basically, but it's a werewolf instead. Bit by werewolf, good. You take 13 points of damage.

That's great to hear. And you're gonna need to make two constitution saving throws. Okay. Okay. Alright. Okay. That's cool. Let me tell you now, reading through a manual to monster, there's not much on fixing it. That's cool. Let me tell you now, reading through a manual to monsters,

there's not much on fixing it. That's cool stuff. Well, you already knew that the earlier you deal with it, the better. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, true. Maybe the lake will be magic again. Maybe. Maybe it's one of those things you kill the werewolf, you stop the curse.

Yeah, maybe. Yeah. Which will be nice. Another werewolf attacks Esmeralda. Esmeralda manages to fend off the blows. And another werewolf attacks you, Pip. Pip, a werewolf bites at your shoulder. You manage to step backwards

and wield your crossbow in a threatening-like manner with the grenade in your offhand. The werewolf slams at your crossbow, knocking your guard aside, and then it bites into your now-exposed arm. You take seven points of damage. Shit.

Okay. Fuck. Fuck. It's... Oh, and the werewolf that's making gestures does nothing else. Okay. Then it is Esmeralda's turn. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Esmeralda's chatting to herself. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

She kneels down, not kneels down, she's being attacked by a werewolf. She takes a step back and she also pops out a mobile alchemy bench she spends her action creating something then Hector how many werewolves are within say 5 feet of me? 4

I will cast word of radiance they need to make constitution saving throws or take is it a d6 or 2d6 damage? 1d6 radiant around me. Hell yeah. All of the werewolves fail. They all take 4 points of damage. Hell

yeah. Finally, you've dealt some damage to them. Yeah. Good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did that push any of them off me? Does it do anything to that? No. The werewolf on top of you, you can see its skin ripples and then shudders beneath the sweltering heat of your holy radiance. But unfortunately, nothing else happens. Okay.

And I can't do a spell as a bonus action, can I? After casting a cantrip? No, you can. Yeah. bonus action can i after casting a cantrip no you can yeah oh you that was a can so the only time you can cast two spells in one round is if one of them is a cantrip nice i will cast a shield of faith on myself channeling the holy energy that you're still not sure exactly where it comes from you feel though nonetheless you feel a being of presence a being of presence, a being of love, and a being of protection flow through you and then explode outwards, both in defensive and offensive energies. And it is Pyrrhon's turn.

Heizelos. He's got daggers. He's got a silver dagger. Heizelos. Pyrran quite clearly realizes that he is in a position where he could run.

You and Piran lock eyes for a second and you could see genuine fear in Piran's face. You could see that he is about to break and run.

What would you say? Or do? How tough do I think Piran is? In a physical fight you know well if he's got the drop on you my question actually i guess is do i think piran is running out of fear or because he doesn't think that he can he can win this fight you can't tell piran's just scared. As part of Pip, it's like, well, if he runs, he'll draw one away. And then we're fighting fewer werewolves. But if he's not strong enough, the werewolves might kill him. So Pip doesn't know, though.

Pip doesn't know. Maybe if you run, you'll draw them away. That could help us. You see Piran do a quick mental calculation calculation and then he chooses to stay and fight. Fair enough. Pyrrhon draws his two weapons. He uses a silver dagger and a rapier. He does a quick assessment of the battlefield.

He sees you, Pip, Esmeralda. Both of you are fighting face-to-face with them. He sees a Gogash is fighting face to face. And then finally he locks on Hector. And then Hector, you feel as some presence is behind the werewolf on top of you. And you can hear just a dull. Oh yeah. Good work, Perrin.

I just think he's a brave man. Perrin's come to your aid. Yeah. What a champion. What a great guy he is. Yeah. Well, Piran's rapier does nothing, but Piran's dagger is silvered, and so that does hurt the werewolf.

It takes 20 points of damage. Wow, 20 points of damage. Far out. I guess, look, it's Bax turned. He's flanking. I get it. It's a Gogash's turn a Gogash

understands for once perhaps this has been he's attacked so many times I feel like having seen everybody else's attacks not do damage

I would have at some point yelled out healing fire silver wolf's bane if you've got it or radiant or radiant

yes or radiant or radiant or radiant probably probably yes probably it. Or Radiant? Or Radiant, yes, or Radiant. Or Radiant, or Radiant. Probably, probably, yes, probably. Agogash takes out that ointment jar that he was using to heal your wounds before.

He dips his hand into it. He drops his sword. He just casts his greatsword aside. He kicks the werewolf in the gut so the werewolf staggers backwards and then he lunges on top of the werewolf having dragged his hand out of the ointment jar fighting with a paste is awesome what a cool weapon all right wow a gogash calm the fuck down a gogash slams the werewolf to the ground and he... A gogash deals

30 points of damage to the werewolf he's fighting. And then you hear and a cracking sound. The werewolf is struggling beneath a gogash, but he has locked its jaw in such a position that it can no longer make noise and it can no longer bite. Hell yes.

He's broken its jaw. Now he can just feed it the paste. That is horrific. He feeds it the paste. With his second attack. No, you can hear a go-gash saying, shh, shh, shh, and you can see a pasty hand.

He is trying to shove it down the werewolf's throat. Pip, it's your turn. That's way to fight. Okay, I will throw my grenade at the one who's commanding everything. The grenade slams into the ground in front of him that's something it explodes though okay yeah i mean it's still good that's still good that's a wave of rippling energy throwing a grenade at someone well you're not like oh damn i didn't peg it at the guy

would have been nice he howls in anguish and you can see that his skin begins to burn, but more than just burn, you can see it shifts and cracks. The wolf's mane burns his skin. The healing energy forces his body, forces his werewolf body to heal into a human form. Fuck yes. Not completely, but enough to mangle what's going on there. You cause him 10, 17 points of damage. Hell yes. And you cause two of the werewolves the same, 17 points of damage.

Oh, nice. Okay. Two other werewolves got caught up in the blast area. And then finally, Hector, you heal 10 points of damage. That's nice. That's nice. To be continued... and down and want more D&D content, we have just what you need to scratch that itch. D&D is for Nerds Plus, the symbol, not the word, where you can listen to select campaigns that were once only available to Sants Pants Plus members,

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