D&D is For Nerds - Vampire Infested Barovia II #1 To Vallaki’s Aid

Episode Date: May 6, 2023

While Vallaki burns, our exhausted heroes do their best to garner aid. Hecktor tries the age-old diplomatic tactic of fists before resorting to larceny while Pip has to deal with bats. Lots and lots o...f bats.Want ad-free and even more bonus content? Just check out the Imagination Adventures show page on Apple podcasts! Music by the ever wonderful Lepidora, you can check out her music here. And head to peddlerspress.store to peruse our D&D themed merch store and help support the show! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Ahem, ahem. You're listening to the Sandspants Network. Although you see no water from miles around, we are nevertheless marooned. Stranded in this nightmare called Barovia. To change metaphors, we are imprisoned. The mist that surrounds us are our prison bars, and Baron von Strahd our warden. As far as I can tell, there's no escape except
Starting point is 00:00:28 death, either his or ours. As the Svalach woods part to reveal Valachai, you are flooded with relief. Despite how you will need to sneak in under cover of darkness owing to the fact that you are wanted criminals, the walled settlement still feels like safe harbor after your journey to and from Lake Zarevich.
Starting point is 00:00:54 Your relief, however, is short-lived, as you can see that something is terribly wrong with the city. On the western side, titanic plumes of smoke curl to reach the sky with raging fires at their base from valakai you hear the sounds of distant screaming cries of unadulterated terror the sound of church bells calling distress while the eastern part of valakai burns you see an even more troubling sight covering the western part of the city and it you see an even more troubling sight oh covering the western part of the city in a coat so thick you cannot even make out buildings is a swarm of bats that is more concerning than the city being on fire far from you yeah far far far from you within the city. Escher walks down the main street with a pocket watch in hand, checking the time.
Starting point is 00:01:49 He is behind schedule, and that concerns him. The sorcerer is as good as dead, and without him, Valakai will fall in time. But Strahd can be impatient. The watery mass, the druids, the hag, these are nothing to Strahd. Too unimportant to be distracted. But this invasion, this is important. The city must fall and it must fall tonight. Lest Escher incur Strahd's wrath.
Starting point is 00:02:14 Hundreds, thousands, perhaps even millions of bats gifted to Escher by Strahd directly have caused decimation. No, decimation, he thinks to himself. Escher mentally tallies the corpses. Yes, roughly one-tenth dead. Okay. Behind schedule. Thankfully, his true weapon has yet to be released. What?
Starting point is 00:02:36 Behind Escher, six vampire spawn fan out, moving like stop-motion creatures, but with unnatural speed and dexterity. One crawls along a wall and into a building. From within, Escher hears screams. Okay. Escher gazes around the burning buildings and piled corpses.
Starting point is 00:02:54 He begins taking notes in a ledger. Someone returned the bones to St. Anderle. And this has slowed him down. It's annoying. But a protection that once would have prevented him has only instead slowed this horror. Escher ponders, hmm, how long will it take to burn down a church?
Starting point is 00:03:15 Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Adam, Adam, Adam. We're so tired. I was hoping to at least lie down. Okay, from the tree line, can we see the Vistani camp? Yeah, I guess it's the Vistani camp, Madam Eva's camp, and also the Dusk Elves camp.
Starting point is 00:03:44 What's going on with those three locations as well? You see, well, the Dusk Elves and the permanent Vistani camp is obscured by Valakai. You can't see what's happening there. Madam Eva's troop, however, is nowhere to be seen. That's fair.
Starting point is 00:03:59 They probably hightailed it. Alright. Maybe I, like, look to everybody else and I say, the church? We can see the church is to everybody else and I say, the church? We can say the church is not fallen. You can't say the church. There's a cloud of bats too thick to see any buildings. We know...
Starting point is 00:04:15 You can hear the church bells. Okay, that's a good sign. The church is still... So the church has not fallen. Blue water in. You should get to Danica to Gorgash yes can the dog yender what about Woken?
Starting point is 00:04:31 I imagine, are we still on horses? yeah, Woken is slumped in front of you unconscious is he between me and Kribbit? I guess he could be slumped back in my arms I guess maybe you've got he's in between you and Kribbit, and you've got him cradled in your arms.
Starting point is 00:04:50 Eleniel, can you take Woken to the Dusk Elf camp? We can't see it. Obscured. Oh, not obscured, sorry. You can't see it. It's on the other side of Valakai. But still. We could take Woken to the Dusk Elfs, and then maybe see if they have any sort of
Starting point is 00:05:05 do you have any health potions or anything left anything like that maybe do the Dusk Elves I want to say everything I'm saying is at a horse whisper but I don't want to do that yeah that's going to hurt your throat that's fair enough maybe I look to Eleniel and it's like a look of like
Starting point is 00:05:22 I'm probably not saying anything but like a look of like what state do you think the Dusk Elf camp is and i it's like a look of like i'm not i'm probably not saying anything but like a look of like what state do you think the dusk elf camp is in like it's a worried look like a concerned look she is just staring at burning valakai and then without a word she throws her horse into a wild gallop and starts riding towards Valakai at a tremendous speed. I guess we follow. I guess we follow. She seems like she's got a good hat on her shoulders. You know? She seems more capable than the rest of us. As you ride
Starting point is 00:05:54 towards the western gate, the western part of the city, that's the Vistani and the Dusk Elf settlement is southwest. So you know that you'd want to get there with all haste. You'd want to go around the western
Starting point is 00:06:07 part of the city, the part covered in bats. Yeah. As you ride around there, you hear over the din of the screeching
Starting point is 00:06:15 sound of hundreds, thousands, perhaps more bats. You can hear screaming on the other side of the
Starting point is 00:06:22 walls. At one point, as you're getting, you're probably close enough now you see a woman is picked up aloft by many bats and before your eyes she is torn limb from limb
Starting point is 00:06:33 and the bats drop what is left to the ground. How far away? No, don't get involved. This is quite a range at this point. You hear the screams begin intensifying. You can see, obviously, the bats are tearing people apart. There is currently a massacre happening.
Starting point is 00:06:54 Let's just get to the dusks. Let's just get to the dusk. Assuming Eladiel's heading to the dusk. That's something we can at least... You're in no position to make a potion on the back of a horse. There are a handful of guards manning the wall on this section, and you can see they are trying to help people up and over the wall onto the other side, where people kind of just flee.
Starting point is 00:07:16 Like Helter Skelter. Yeah, Helter Skelter with no particular goal in sight. Okay. As you ride around this side, clearly something's wrong with the gate. You're not 100% sure what. But as you ride around this side, you can see the Vistani
Starting point is 00:07:36 and Dusk Elf camp is not untouched, but you can see that they are doing okay. Okay. You see kind of a makeshift battlements almost. The Vistani wagons that were at the top of the hill are now at the base of the hill, forming as best a perimeter as possible.
Starting point is 00:07:54 And you can see there are maybe two dozen people with arms and armor, both Vistani and Dusk Elves all armed together, spears facing outwards, ready to fight anything that comes at them. The bats seem to, well, they're a little bit of a ride from Valakai. Like maybe a 15, 20 minute ride. Yeah, sure. So they're a little distance away.
Starting point is 00:08:16 It doesn't look like much fighting has come this far. Okay. Eleniel rides, as I said, hard towards that ring. And as you get closer and closer, you see that she slows down, stops. And as you approach her, she's breathing heavily. And she turns back to look at you with a frenetic energy. I cannot go back in, she says. Not by the Vistani watch.
Starting point is 00:08:44 Ah. Of course Okay You Take What can What is What is maybe a pressing issue That we know that maybe
Starting point is 00:08:53 We can send her to the tower If she needs to flee Actually maybe getting Gorub and Lushen's help here Might be useful It is several days Is this a conversation the two of you are having? Yeah, I would say so. Where is this place?
Starting point is 00:09:09 She says. It is in... It's on the shores of Lake Baratok, yeah? Yeah. The shores of Lake Baratok. Can't miss it. Was someone riding with her? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:09:19 We have four horses. She actually would have had Woken, I guess. Because then it would be, oh no. No, you were riding with her, right, Hector? Because you, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's me and her on one horse, and it's Woken, Kribbit, and Pip on the other. Eleniel, just for you to get off, Hector. I'm already off.
Starting point is 00:09:40 All right. She looks at the two of you and says, Gorob Lushen, is there some sort of phrase that they might know me by? Tell them that you know the people that know Van Richten. She gives you a weird look, turns to fetch Gorob Lushen, but as she does so, she canters a little bit and then turns back, looks very worriedly at the Dusk Elf slash Vistani encampment. And then turning her horse back to face you, she says, I, there are, within the Vistani, there are absolutely, there is an element that reports to Strahd, possibly directly.
Starting point is 00:10:19 If, if they see Woken, he may not be safe there. Could you take him with you? I could, yes. I like look at the burning Valakai and then at the untrustworthy Vistani. My encampment within the forests is not far. And is Gorob and Lushen, are they healers? One of them is a wizard, but... One of them is a wizard.
Starting point is 00:10:44 The other uses weapons. They are conjoined? Not a... what? I believe it is one of Strahd's... It was so similar. It doesn't matter. It does not matter.
Starting point is 00:10:59 But not a wizard of healing. Not new. Well then, Gorub and Lushen, unless we need the assistance, I think it would be best if I hide and hide with Woken in my encampment. I will take him there now. You transfer Woken onto her horse. My hand trails over his as I have to say goodbye again. If we can get Yenda, I just leave that hand.
Starting point is 00:11:24 If we can get Yenda, I just leave that hanging. If we can get Yenda, we can send her to... Gorob Lushen, these people, I can send a messenger to them. If you need their assistance, if they being here would help. Reinforcements would be nice.
Starting point is 00:11:40 If you can simply say something, Gorob Lushen, it is Hector. We need your assistance in Valakai now. You see her do the mental math on how many words is that? Presumably there is a limit. Am I on notes? She nods and she says, yes, I think, all right.
Starting point is 00:12:04 It will take me some time to prepare the spell, but I'll do that at my camp. All right. Good luck to you, time to prepare the spell, but I'll do that at my camp. All right. Good luck to you, she says. Thank you. Thank you. She turns and she rides into the forest. Okay. All right.
Starting point is 00:12:15 I hop on the back of, hop on the front of. There's not enough room on the horse. It's me, Cribbit, and. All right. Yeah. Cribbit is small. Cribbit go in the middle. Cribbit's been mostly. Is he a better horseman than I? I don't want to, like, take over Cribbit's. You don't want to harsh Cribbit's been mostly Is he a better horseman than I?
Starting point is 00:12:25 I don't want to take over Kribbit's You don't want to harsh Kribbit's vibe He'd be like, let me drive this car I'm like, I can drive this car What's your animal handling? It's so fucking awesome if Kribbit rides us into Valagai Uh, it's kind of tomato
Starting point is 00:12:42 tomato I just maybe jump on behind you hugging the back of Pip to the Dusk Elves or to the Valakai the Dusk Elves and the Vistani look fine they don't look like they need
Starting point is 00:12:57 assistance but you might want to go there we need assistance yeah do I think that the Dusk Elves are... Pip. Yeah? Go to Valakai. I'll meet you in there.
Starting point is 00:13:09 Okay. All right. I'll take Cribbit. Cribbit. Take Cribbit. Cribbit, I need you to ride the horse. Chop, chop. All right.
Starting point is 00:13:21 Quite clearly, he's not sure what's going to be the best, where he's going to get the best story right now but yeah he rides with you towards valak i jump back off and run towards the encampment as you approach the encampment you see they're leveling spears at your approach one of them maybe a vastani yells out to you who goes there i am friend i am friend it's hector hector hector the beauty hector dragon spain hector dragon spain dragon spain that's what you would know me by there. I am friend, I am friend. It's Hector. Hector. Hector the Beauty. Hector Dragonsbane. Hector Dragonsbane. Dragonsbane. That's what you would know me by? Don't know other names. I've never had another name.
Starting point is 00:13:50 Don't you worry. It is fine. Don't speak to anyone about me. Why would you talk to someone else about me? That's going to be very funny if we ever get out of Barovia. Because like here, obviously no one knows. Hector Dragonsbane. No. I think you're Hector Dragonsman, no. I think you're Hector the Beautiful, actually.
Starting point is 00:14:07 Like a side-eye. Oh, okay. I didn't know. One of the Vistani approaches, you see rather than, most of them have kind of just makeshift spears and shields. Obviously these are not
Starting point is 00:14:22 soldiers, they're not even militiamen, they're just people who have picked up whatever is available. This, the person who approaches you, though, looks like maybe the only among them, the only actual warrior of any sort. He's wearing proper leather armor, he has a dagger for a weapon, but he holds it in a way that implies that he knows how to use it. Okay, cool.
Starting point is 00:14:49 He approaches you and he says, My name is Aragog. Who are you? I am Hector. I am Hector Dragonsbane. We have just come from the Lake Zarovich. Is that where we were? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:02 We've just come from Lake Zarovich. We dealt with the watery mess. Hector, he says, he looks past you and... Oh, get a good boy card. Yes. Nice. And you realize for a moment he recognizes you. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:15:17 He recognizes you and he looks... It's actually maybe not a very obvious look past you. It's kind of his eyes dart past you, and you realize he was searching for perhaps a certain dragonborn, perhaps maybe a big orc of some description, a little halfling, maybe a little crib at me. And he sees just you. He quite clearly recognizes you,
Starting point is 00:15:42 but then he says, ah, are you local? And that is obviously like, he knows who you are, but he's feigning ignorance. Yeah, yes. Okay. The only way that they would know this is that they were spies of Strahd, correct? I mean, it's a decent chance. You have heard that some of these Vistani are not trustworthy. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:02 I don't need to be, like, if I am going to be, like, treating this person as antagonistic, like, there is not really, there's a very small chance that it is just because they might be just, have talked to the locals, but there's a very large chance this is. How fast does word travel in Barovia? Can I just, like, make a mental note of his appearance? If you want, I've got a picture of Aragal. I would like to see him.
Starting point is 00:16:30 Yeah, nah, there's no... He's just shifty. Shifty, but also quite handsome. Looks like... So if the devil ever came to Georgia, that. He does have a little bit of a... It's the goatee, I think. It's a very pointy goatee
Starting point is 00:16:45 And the eyebrows as well If he was wearing a red suit As opposed to a green suit He'd be like oh well that's a station I understand now So when he asks me if I'm a local I smile and say yes of course I am And then as I
Starting point is 00:17:01 Push past Who is in charge? Aragorn shrugs and says, I suppose me and my brother. Would you like to, he gestures to the top of the hill. You can still see the Vistani had some tents set up. I guess not permanent structures, but non-mobile structures that are still up the top of the hill. As I'm like, yeah, right. Okay.
Starting point is 00:17:22 Uh, looking around for the Dusk Elves. You can see a few Dusk Elves here as well. They're very sparse around here. There's a lot more Vistani than there is Dusk Elves. About 50% more, you might say. From what I was told, the Dusk Elves, they joined the fight. They are like a warrior. They were a warrior people.
Starting point is 00:17:45 You wouldn't know if they were or were not a warrior people, but you do know that all of the Dusk Elves here rose up against Strahd and were put down pretty brutally. Okay, okay. Look, they're in charge. They are working for Strahd. How helpful are they going to be? You're in the belly of the beast.
Starting point is 00:18:03 Please, if you wish to speak to someone in charge, you want to save Valakai? Of course, you do not. Yes, of course we do, he says. I mean, like, you knew he was lying. Openly attacking this man. Well, you're going to fight the Vistani, I guess. Because not all Vistani are evil right no no not as a people
Starting point is 00:18:30 but these guys are anytime the Duskelves have spoken about it they've been like some of these Vistani work for Strahd and some of these Vistani are spies against the Duskelves for Strahd alright maybe I should try and scan for Mark Willett.
Starting point is 00:18:47 Good job. You find him. Or you see him, I should say. All right. He's just in among the line. He quite clearly hasn't noticed you. There's a lot of things. A lot of fires, figurative and literal need putting out.
Starting point is 00:19:00 Yeah, yeah. I'm on such little health. I know. Fuck, dude. It's scary. Cool. Can I intimidate this man into
Starting point is 00:19:08 um uh be like just lock eyes with him what did you do to help him uh Aragog
Starting point is 00:19:15 considers you for a second looks you up and down and you see he spots every single wound
Starting point is 00:19:22 and there are a lot on you it's not covered in wolf blood yeah yeah he covered in scratches he looks back at Balak He spots every single wound, and there are a lot on you. It's not covered in wolf blood. Yeah, yeah. It's covered in scratches. He looks back at Valakai. While he is not intimidated by you, he realizes that there's no secret to keep. So looking back at you, he says, quite honestly, in your opinion, in your estimation, he says quite honestly,
Starting point is 00:19:41 I had nothing to do with this. It caught me as surprised as anyone else well are they going to any pretense is gone are they bats in that are they going to come and attack you they maybe maybe not I do not know
Starting point is 00:19:54 where do you stand right now are you helping you hindering are you going to stab me in the back what is this I would not it would be rude to stab a guest in the back he says yeah are you going to try to stop this or are you going to try and do nothing?
Starting point is 00:20:08 What would you have me do? Anything, something. What can you do? What supplies do you have? What is the situation here? He gestures to the people around. Do you think our position here is strong, strong enough to send someone out? I guess not.
Starting point is 00:20:23 Do you have any supplies? Do you have anything? Do you have anything? We have... Do you have any supplies? Do you have anything? We have... Do you have any weapons? Do you have any armor? Do you have any potions? Do you have anything? If we had weapons, I would be supplying them to my people. Is he my size? He's about as big as you.
Starting point is 00:20:39 With five health, you're going to rob this man of his clothes? No, he's sort of... He'll be like, fine, I will leave this man of his clothes? No, I just want to be like, fine. I will leave this camp. I will leave this to be. They're like, can I borrow your armor or can I have your armor? I love that because it's such a funny, like, consistent thing that Hector does. I just need.
Starting point is 00:20:57 Give me your clothes. Give me your clothes. I need some fucking armor. Pulling a fucking Terminator. That happened early on in Crescent. Give me your armor and everyone else is like what?
Starting point is 00:21:07 Why? No. Your clothes. Give them to me. Okay. Okay. I just want to size him up. Clearly there is nothing
Starting point is 00:21:16 that you can do but I would like to employ if you have any decency in a a shred of decency in you I am asking you if you have any decency, a shred of decency in you, I am asking you, if you have any armor, anything to spare, please, can I have it?
Starting point is 00:21:30 And I want to try and do a persuasion check, Adam. I'm good at this. Disadvantage, because he's the enemy. Of course. Why would he help you? Nah, he shakes his head. I have nothing to spare. I would not just give you something.
Starting point is 00:21:48 I walk away. I don't even listen. I walk away and I go to Mark Willett. As you approach Mark Willett, you can see that he is speaking to someone else. This is maybe the second person that you've seen who is equipped with actual armor. It's another Dusk Elf, but this Dusk Elf is, even by elven standards, you can see that he is old.
Starting point is 00:22:10 Maybe well into 800, 900 years old. Quite ancient even for an elf. As you approach, both of them stop and look at you. This other Dusk Elf, he wears, like I said, he wears maybe kind of a hide armor of sorts. You can see it's made out
Starting point is 00:22:28 of animal leathers. And he has a big, heavy fur helm that obscures most of his features. Imagine those kind of classic knight helms where you look through a slit, but imagine it's all made of fur. That's cool. That's awesome. He turns to look at
Starting point is 00:22:44 you, and Mark Mark Willett says, Ah, Hector. How is everything? What is the situation here? Have you had much attacks your way? Some light skirmishy sort of things. Just some bats, I suppose, maybe probing our defenses. But no, they seem quite content to do what they're doing. Do you have any
Starting point is 00:23:05 anything to help? I need to get in there. Do you have anything to assist? He looks. Do you have anything to help me? He looks around and he says, I'm afraid we haven't the will to fight. Okay. I may be kind of getting close, making sure there's no
Starting point is 00:23:23 Vistani around. Woken is alive. Mark Willett's eyes and the other Dusk Elves' eyes go wide. I understand that you have no will to live, but right now I have the will to live, and I need your help. Woken is alive, but he is in trouble. He is with our friend somewhere safe, He's in trouble.
Starting point is 00:23:44 He is with our friend somewhere safe. And I need to go into Valakai and try and help our other friends. So do you have anything, anything right now that can help me? I look to the older Dusk Elf. If you are a warrior. He pushes the faceplate of his helmet up so that you can get a good look at his wizened ancient features. And he says, the town watched as we were slain and now we watch as they are slain. The whole town did, did they?
Starting point is 00:24:19 Everybody. Every single person in that town watched as you were slain. All the innocents, all the children, all the men and women that have no part in this, and you're happy to watch them burn. He nods. Yes. Fuck you. I punch him in the face. All right.
Starting point is 00:24:36 You swing and connect. You deal. What is it? Do you want to deal as much damage as you can? Non-lethal. But as much damage as you can? Non-lethal. But as much damage as you can? All right, you deal four points of damage to him. All right.
Starting point is 00:24:52 A nice opening salvo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You really think that your enemies are just going to stop with Valakai? Maybe when they're finished in there, they are just going to come out here and finish the job that they started a year ago. You attempt to intimidate, I guess I'd call that an intimidation. You attempt to intimidate him.
Starting point is 00:25:16 While you're shoving into him, he tries to knock your attack aside, and then he tries to slam a fist into your chest. You need to make a saving throw. Hector, you begin floating into the air. When he slams his fist into you, you feel weightlessness overcome you and you fall 10 feet up. Okay, can I try and grab him as I'm floating? Unfortunately, no. Oh, as I'm floating? Unfortunately, no.
Starting point is 00:25:48 He knocks your guard aside with one hand, and he knocks your guard aside with the other hand, and then you begin floating. As I'm floating, I want to start calling out, you can help us, you fucking coward. Mark Quillett turns to him, and you hear Mark Quillett say, there is wisdom in his words. The old man, the old elf shakes his head and says,
Starting point is 00:26:10 I will not sacrifice more of my people for those who would not sacrifice for us. What do you think I am doing? I yell down. He shakes his head and turns away. Mark Willett grabs a rope, lassos you and pulls you down.
Starting point is 00:26:28 That is your leader? Yes, that's his name is Kazimir Velikov. Mark Quillett maybe also pulls you aside. You can see several of the Dusk Elves have kind of made their way over here after this little commotion and you think if you
Starting point is 00:26:44 throw another punch, you will start a fight. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mark Willett, yeah, is kind of ushering you away from that. He doesn't want this. You will offer us no assistance. Mark Willett looks really genuinely apologetic, and he says, I'm very sorry. I wish that we could help you, but...
Starting point is 00:27:01 You can help us. You know more than I do that one person can make a difference. I look around to see if there is a... Is there a horse or anything like that? Or maybe some horses that I can just maybe just grab? Or maybe steal? You could try stealing a horse if you wanted to. Yeah, sure.
Starting point is 00:27:16 All right. Well, I'm not going to roll because it's the Dusk Elves' horses, and they're not going to try and take it. But they're not going to... They, for whatever reason their own reasons don't kick up a stink when you take one of their horses good i'm taking that horse i get on and i ride out i just ride out and then let's jump to pip pip where are you going so the uh the church where are you telling credit to take you yeah yeah yeah the church kind of
Starting point is 00:27:43 adjusts onto the wall doesn't it onto onto the wall, doesn't it? Oh, it doesn't? It's quite in the middle? It's not quite in the middle, but it's not next to a wall. Okay, but it'd probably be better to clamber over a wall to get to it rather than go to a gate and then to it. Do I think that would be quicker? Well, the closest gate, there are three gates to Valachai. There's the north gate, the one that you fled through yesterday yeah yeah
Starting point is 00:28:05 the east gate where all of the flames are and then the west gate which is the closest but there seems to be something wrong with that gate okay well and which gate is closest to the church uh that would be the west gate all right okay we'll ride we'll ride to the west gate and if it's too complicated we'll just vault the wall. Yeah. As you approach the West Gate, you can see that the two winching mechanisms are molten piles of slag.
Starting point is 00:28:34 You're not sure what has happened, but someone has sabotaged this gate, preventing it from opening. There is, as I said previously, a steady trickle of people clambering out. Actually, no, that stopped. There, a steady trickle of people clambering out. Actually, no, that stopped. There was a steady trickle of people clambering out of Valakai. But the bats who have dominion of the skies have made being on the wall not a pleasant thing.
Starting point is 00:28:57 You don't see anyone on the walls right now. You hear screaming from within. Okay. It would be, like, almost fix those malt those destroyed winches yeah this this gate is not being lifted by anything except manpower basically okay all right as it was previously you know what i mean yeah no no no unless somebody gets underneath and pushes up with some orc of great strength we're able to lift them okay well that means we're vaulting the wall to get in
Starting point is 00:29:25 to at least find them. Both you and Kribbit have a climb speed. So you reach the wall and then both you begin Well, I mean Kribbit is Kribbit's making the sucking noises. It's stinky. P-U, Kribbit.
Starting point is 00:29:40 Kribbit is sticky. You are just a really natural climber. So you, with hand holds and Kribbit is sticky You are just a really natural climber So you with hand holds And Cribbit with sticky hands Make your way up to the top And then when you get up there Immediately you are both buffeted by bats Yeah
Starting point is 00:29:55 There's no chance really to retaliate Against them It's like a bat comes in, swoops, attacks, leaves And you may never see that bat again yeah as long as you live so it yeah like i said it's just one bat after another bat after another bat after another bat both you and cribbit oh no take nine points of damage jesus that's not good i don't know how much i have but i feel like any amount now is dangerous. I think it's over 20. Well, not anymore.
Starting point is 00:30:27 It was just. Yeah. Okay. Cool. You're on 12 hit points. All right. Do we make it over the other side, though? Just like while we're up there, we suffer the bats?
Starting point is 00:30:36 You can start climbing down, yeah, if you want. There is no one, no living person on this side of the, on the other side of the wall. It looks like people have fled. You can see a lot of parts of people. person on this side of the on the other side of the wall it looks like people have fled you can see a lot of parts of people you climb down into the gore which you realize for a disgusting moment it's like the battle that you saw before with corpses piled up except it's just bits yeah of corpses and it's piled up in such a way that there is a ramp that you can walk down on the other side that's unsettling okay we'll do that but i want to try and start making my way towards the church
Starting point is 00:31:10 but quietly i'm going to try and sneak my way there all right i don't think going out in the open is clever you move with cribbit from building interior to building interior many of the building interiors as you make your way in you see people cowering wherever they can, under tables, inside of wardrobes, that sort of thing. You every now and then encounter corpses as well. And a few of these buildings have had all of their doors and windows exploded in, and they're kind of just acting as roosts for these bats. Oh, no. Which fly in, settle there for a little bit, and either move on or stay as they desire. Okay.
Starting point is 00:31:48 Well, we avoid any ones that are bat houses if we can. Sure. You make your way towards the church. As you go, unfortunately, when you enter one house, it all seems quiet for a brief moment. And as you get to the other side of the building, you admire for a brief second the velvet, the black velvety drapes above you stuck to the roof. And then you realize, wow, yeah, you know what. I know what's coming.
Starting point is 00:32:23 Okay. And you disturb an entire building filled with bats You and Kribbit take 5 points of damage Okay God damn it Maybe we'll get healed in the church Right? Church is a place of healing
Starting point is 00:32:38 Right? You're on 7 hit points Okay, I'd like to be I don't know if this is something i can do yeah but ready for the next bat attack like i would like to be on like uh high alert yeah high alert like spring loaded with my crossbow ready to fire if i see the roof start to shift again or if i'm like that's a particularly furry chandelier. Yeah. All right. You, thankfully, this extra heightened level of awareness prevents the next particularly tragic thing that could have happened. Just before the church is an open graveyard that you would need to sprint through.
Starting point is 00:33:18 You'd need to hop the fence, get into the graveyard. It's not a particularly high fence, but it's a fence that would require you to jump. And then sprint across the open graveyard, get to the church. As you're about to make that gauntlet, you see you spot something crawling along the side of the church.
Starting point is 00:33:38 Moving, once again with an unnatural speed. Like a stop motion puppet. Like a stop motion creature, making an awful sort of noise which can be just by its pitch can be heard
Starting point is 00:33:52 above the din of the bats. Crawling along the side of the church you see a vampire spawn. The creature is it was once maybe a dwarf but now as vampires spawn its arms and legs are unnaturally long with awful spiny claw-like hands and feet.
Starting point is 00:34:12 It crawls along the side of the building. It has not spotted you, but if you sprinted out in the open, it absolutely would have intercepted you. Does the church have a basement? Like a basement entrance at all? Does the church have a basement? Like a basement entrance at all? You know, I don't know. Maybe that's a... Maybe not like a medieval church.
Starting point is 00:34:27 That's maybe more like an American weatherboard church or whatever. But, you know, like a wooden... I know what you mean, yeah. Yeah. No, unfortunately, there is no basement. Is there only one entrance at the front? There is a front entrance and, you know, a side entrance where this... The vampire spawn's kind of near the side entrance.
Starting point is 00:34:44 Yeah, yeah, and then a rear entrance where this The vampire spawn is kind of near the side entrance Yeah, and then a rear entrance Alright, we're going to get down really low and try and sneak our way around to the side entrance. I wonder if I could make some kind of Do I have any quieting or invisibility alchemy potions?
Starting point is 00:35:01 Anything that can make me invisible? Well, we'll try and sneak. I know I'm good at sneaking. I don't know about Kribbit, but He's little alchemy potions anything that can make me invisible well we'll try and sneak i know i'm good at sneaking i don't know about cribbit but he's little he's little cribbit slowly carefully behind you pulls out a little drum cribbit begins drumming is it i've i lock eyes with the or not lock eyes hopefully but i look at the vampire spawn the vampire spawn looks back in your direction but as it's turning its head yeah you notice that every time one of cribbets what do you call the things that you hit the drum with
Starting point is 00:35:36 sticks every time drumstick every time cribbit hits the drum with the drumstick yeah it stops making the boom like that normal noise and instead it makes a strange not even noise like the opposite of noise okay like a little silence happens every time one of them strikes the drum obviously pip does not have this frame of reference yeah but imagine a set of noise yeah headphones he's's making the sound under the sound or whatever. Yeah, he's making the inverse sound wave of the noises that the two of you are making. Okay. You both get...
Starting point is 00:36:11 Give him a little thumbs up. You both get a D8 on your stealth check. Fuck, that rolls. All right, we'll start creeping toward the back entrance. You and Kribbit are able to sneak in through the back door to the church. How many people are in here? Is it packed? As you enter, you can see there are about as many people as can be in the church.
Starting point is 00:36:33 You, well, yeah, you will actually struggle to move through the thronging masses of people. There's a lot, just a lot of people here all in various states of disrepair shall we say yeah some of them crying openly bawling you can see a few people in corners kind of in like a fetal position basically either muttering to themselves or maybe also crying you can see it's just a scene of half pandemonium, half abject suffering. I, like, knew Father Lucian before, yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I might try and seek him out. All right.
Starting point is 00:37:12 Push through the throngs of people. Takes you a little while because of just the thick mass of people. But you find Father Lucian's on the other side of the church at the front doors. You can see that the doors are barred. But there are, like, so many windows that the bats could come through at any time. The doors actually don't feel like... Actually, when you went through the back door, it wasn't even locked. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:32 You don't know... Well, yeah, there you go. Okay. Yeah, I approach Father Lucian. When he turns and sees you, you can see relief flooding through him. Pip, he looks past you and sees only Kribbit. He just doesn't have the space to lie. He seems a little disappointed it's just the two of you.
Starting point is 00:37:58 Can you give me some kind of... What happened? It began... I think it began this morning. From what I have been able to piece together, it was slow at first, just a trickle. Bats were coming from somewhere on the other side of the city. They were attacking people and it at first was just concerning, but then over time it became more and more and more until it is what it is now.
Starting point is 00:38:30 Is there like an epicenter? Is there a place it's focusing on? All I know is that it began on the other side of the city. Beyond this, I do not know. I have heard tale that there is the Burj Al-Masjid Bandar. I have heard tale people say that that is also still safe. That's interesting, right? Yeah, it's unusual.
Starting point is 00:38:52 I can probably put two and two together, though, right? There are two churches in town. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I have heard a lot of things, though. I have heard that the Watcher House is safe, and so is the orphanage. Oh, that's interesting.
Starting point is 00:39:10 And maybe some scattered guard houses. But these reports, they're not even reports. It's just people who have seen things. You know your back door is open, I say. Yes. I cannot bar the back door. Why not? I was repairing it when this happened. Oh, I say. Yes. I cannot bar the back door. Why not? It was,
Starting point is 00:39:25 I was repairing it when this happened. Oh, I see. Nothing has come in through any of the entrances, though. Is that the bones doing that? I believe so, yes. That's good.
Starting point is 00:39:34 Pieces happened previously and nothing this bad has ever happened, but if such things ever happened before, nothing could step upon holy ground. Right.
Starting point is 00:39:45 The halfling priest or cleric or what have you, Yenda? Yes. I don't know if you know what happened to her. I was aware that she was apprehended, but beyond this, I know nothing. And the Blue Water Inn, do you know what's happening there? I have heard no reports of the Blue Water Inn. That's not good. Okay.
Starting point is 00:40:04 A gogash? You don't know a gogash, do you? The orc. Yeah, the orc. He was here a few hours ago. Okay, that's good. That's good. Do you know where he went?
Starting point is 00:40:12 I told him what I have told you. He said he wished to seek out the yender. He wished to seek her out. I think he just went eastwards. He did not seem to have a specific goal in mind Do I know where the jail or whatever would be? The jail would be Does Valakai have a dedicated jail
Starting point is 00:40:37 or is it kind of like I'd be checking guardhouse to guardhouse Your understanding of law and order crime and and punishment, if you will, in Valakai, is that it is typically very swift and quite merciless. No, you have no idea where they would hold a prisoner. East. Do I know what might be east? Like, have I got any idea what a go gash might be heading for the blue water in the burj master's manor probably watch your house blue water probably the place to go i know why look watch your house will be protected because lady watcher
Starting point is 00:41:18 is a of a goon one of stride's goons. And the Burgomaster's house will be because he's worshipping devils. I don't know why the orphanage is safe. That's interesting. Alright. I guess Blue Water Inn is the next stop. Maybe I go to leave. Maybe back at the back door.
Starting point is 00:41:39 There's a vampire spawn crawling on the roof of the side of the wall on the outside. Father Lucian does the little hand gesture where he puts the two fingers to his lips. And you can see he kind of like mutters a prayer under his breath. Okay. All right. Well, I hold here. Good luck, I say.
Starting point is 00:41:57 And to you as well. Father Lucian places his hands upon you and he says, Please, be healed. You recover 19 hit points. Fuck yeah. There's something very funny about the fact that Pip, while looking for it, got healed. Heck, they're so desperate for any kind of help. Gets fucking bow diddly.
Starting point is 00:42:20 You are still so badly wounded and he doesn't know that he should be saving these. But I know, yeah. Well, I mean, you know also that it's... Take his hands off me if he goes for it a second time. It's an old thing, but you have a limited amount of those at the moment. I feel my connection to the morning lord. That'll be that. Yes.
Starting point is 00:42:42 I am aware. Where are your friends, he says. Well, Hector, who you know, he's at the Dusk Elf camp. Go Gash and Yender, I couldn't say. How do they fare? It seemed like they were doing all right. He puts his hand on his heart. That is at least something.
Starting point is 00:42:59 As long as Hector doesn't do anything stupid, he might be able to get some help there. Will he follow you through here? I don't. We had barely seconds to come up with a plan. I'm just going to travel. I will save some for him then, but I feel if I were to give it to anyone, it would be you and the little one, he says.
Starting point is 00:43:20 I turn over to Kribbit. How's he looking? He's not looking well, right? Kribbit's a bit hurt, yeah. Yeah. Where is Kribbit? Kribbit's sitting at 18 out of 45. Okay, yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:29 Maybe look after Kribbit some. You recover another 22 hit points, putting you on a total of 58. And then I think the priest is going to switch to Kribbit. Mm-hmm. He's used all of his third levels. Good to hear. That's good stuff. Kribbit heals 20 hit points total.
Starting point is 00:43:53 All right. Not as good, but still. That's coming five. Kribbit is closer to being full hit points. So, but I mean, it's a, you know. If your friend comes through, I have still some magic for him too. Alright, just be careful.
Starting point is 00:44:10 Appreciate it, Padre. We're gonna head for the Blue Water Inn. Scooping up, Kribbit. I don't know why I'm picking him up. I don't do that. Do you have any other maladies? He's got some... I don't think I've got any effects on me. Pip's not doing too bad
Starting point is 00:44:25 He can't heal your exhaustion unfortunately That's very fine I need a good night's sleep You need seven good night's sleep Alright we're going to steal out the back of the church And start sneaking our way Toward the blue water inn Okay
Starting point is 00:44:39 Bad attack Yeah bad attack Only you this time. Eight points of damage. Fuck me dead. Back down to 50. Does Valakai have a sewer system? No.
Starting point is 00:44:52 Okay. No, no, no. It's open sewerage. That was also going to be Mike. Okay, cool. Oh, eyes on those, buddy boy. What do you recommend? I wouldn't.
Starting point is 00:45:03 I couldn't say. Let's go eyes. Eyes? Okay. Actually, I've thought about it, Adam. I've had some time. And I'm going closed. Will I allow that?
Starting point is 00:45:16 I'll allow it in exchange for a good boy card. Drop a good boy card. Okay, can I pick the good boy card? You can pick it, yeah, sure. What have I got that sucks? Where did I get this one oh this is really good okay i'm using my bad boy card what was the one that you were just saying what was that one you gain the benefit of a long rest on a short rest an offer they can't refuse
Starting point is 00:45:37 trade a bad boy card for a good boy card of your choice can Can I have that one, please? Fuck! And in exchange, I'm going to give you... Yeah, have Magical Mishap. Okay. Why? That's good, maybe. Maybe that'll come in. Whenever I get this, this is a magical... Rolling on the wild magic table, which is what that bad boy does, is always like last resort.
Starting point is 00:45:59 That's very funny. You're going to die. Fucking fire it off, see what happens. God damn, I should never open my big mouth. You could have all your spells back. I could have used that on you. Did you drop the good boy card? Yeah. All right, cool.
Starting point is 00:46:09 Well, in that case, yeah, you spot another vampire spawn crawling its way along the city wall. This one is an elf of some variety, but obviously an elf no longer. You see a member of the town guard is sprinting. Oh no, maybe from some bushes. A member of the town guard who you think has been spotted starts sprinting from the bushes. The vampire spawn leaps a full 50 feet, lands on them, knocking them to the ground,
Starting point is 00:46:37 and you hear their terrified screams as you continue. Well, we'll move into an alleyway before we see what happens to that poor person. And you're heading towards the blue water inn, right? Yeah, that's the next step. Oh, you and Kribbit take five points of damage. Oh my god, these fucking bats. At least they're not picking us up.
Starting point is 00:46:56 That's so intense. Nah, you've not rolled badly enough for that yet. Okay. I can't be touched by them. Yeah, you'll die. If a bat hits you you die You get to the Blue Water Inn Okay fabulous You can see
Starting point is 00:47:10 the Blue Water Inn is three different buildings It's the one main building that has the inn and all the rooms and the bar and whatnot and then there's a separate side building which is the Mardukov family's
Starting point is 00:47:22 personal residence And then finally there's a set of stables. The stables have been almost completely demolished. You can see the horses that once were in there are very dead. And maybe you see a mass of black
Starting point is 00:47:38 bats crawling over something like ants. And you realize beneath is a horse that has been stripped nearly to the bone the monocle residence is partially caved in so if yeah you can see into like kitchen and bedroom you don't see any bodies in there but there is like smoke curling from it quite clearly a fire yeah has caught there the main inn looks to be untouched, but there are bats crawling over it. Okay.
Starting point is 00:48:08 If I went for, like, the door to the inn, would I basically incur an attack of bats? You, yeah, you would potentially. You'd need to roll to avoid them. Okay. I would like to get down on one knee and fire off a spray shot at them. This is one of my sharpshooting tricks. Oh yeah. Using a spray shot, uh,
Starting point is 00:48:31 using an action, the sharpshot companion attacks every enemy they have line of sight on a line of attack of 30 feet in a cone. Each attack and its damage must be rolled individually. You may use this ability twice before needing a short rest. So just to try and take care of as many bats around the entrance as possible so we can slip in unaffected.
Starting point is 00:48:51 You stick maybe 20 crossbow bolts into the floor in front of you. Then, sighing heavily, you try something that a mentor of yours taught you how to do once, but you've never actually done in a combat situation. You load 10 crossbow bolts in at once and fire them all with a scattered explosion like buckshot from a shotgun you fire out and i'm gonna say you don't even need to roll the bats with one of them gets hit that's enough so you just destroy a small area of bats, giving you and Kribbit enough room to duck into the doorway. That's good. That's good. The inn. So I think I've explained this before.
Starting point is 00:49:33 The inn has a balcony that overlooks it, and that's where all the rooms are. Then there's the tap house, if you will. And behind that is some back rooms. You can see that there are a few people cowering under tables here. You look up and you can see in the tiled roof, holes have been torn away and bats flit in and around the rafters. That sucks. There's not enough of them here to pose a serious threat.
Starting point is 00:49:59 Like if one comes near you, you can kind of bat it away. But they are still slowly kind of swarming or or growing in number as you enter you can see from out from behind the bar danica appears with a crossbow she fires it up at the ceiling the bats just part as the bolt hits the roof instead she ducks back behind the bar and several bats swoop down to attack at her but hit only the bar, scattering some tankards and whatnot. Erwin, from up on the balcony
Starting point is 00:50:32 you can see that one of the room doors is open. He's also holding a crossbow bolt. He looks out and calls out to you, Watch out! They're everywhere! Uh, okay. Can I like slide under one of the tables for cover? Yeah, sure.
Starting point is 00:50:46 Yeah. Where do you go? You slide underneath with some other terrified patrons, basically. Hi, how you doing? Is a go-gash here? He came by. He wanted to know if we knew where this came from. Yeah, yeah, right, right.
Starting point is 00:51:00 We did not know anything more than what the priest told him. Somewhere to the east of town. All right. Are you all right in here? I mean, obviously not all right, but like... We... So long as they do not continue to mass, we will be fine. It looks like they're continuing to mass, right?
Starting point is 00:51:18 Oh, yeah. The church is safe for the time being. If you need to move, go there. We have been sending people that direction when we can. All right, that's something. It is not easy. I can see out, you can see he's gazing out one of the windows. He's got a vantage you don't have.
Starting point is 00:51:36 I can see every now and then as well, Danica pokes her head out again, fires and then ducks back down. I can see from the east, the fires, they lick their way closer here. Okay. I do not think we have much more time here, but breaking cover could be, it is not safe, he says.
Starting point is 00:51:56 Yeah, yeah. Do I think, fuck, getting them to the church, I mean, I could provide cover fire a little bit, right? Like, what's the distance between here and the church, I mean, I could provide cover fire a little bit, right? Like, what's the distance between here and the church? The church is maybe a 15 minute run. Okay, I don't know if I could cover them
Starting point is 00:52:14 for that long. Oh, no, less than that, actually. It'd be like a 5 minute run. Okay, I might be able to cover them for that period of time. Sure. I can provide cover for you if you want to make the run now, I say. Alright, alright. Um, I can provide cover for you if you want to make the run now, I say. All right, all right. Hang on, we must gather everyone. Erwin ducks back into the room, and you can hear rummaging around.
Starting point is 00:52:35 He quickly darts from in-room to in-room, and you see there are quite a few people who have taken cover here. All told, there might be like 50 people here. Is the dog here? Yeah, the dog is here. All told, there might be like 50 people here. Is the dog here? Yeah, the dog is here. That's good to hear. Yeah, that's nice. That's Jesker and maybe now boy Chonza.
Starting point is 00:52:52 Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're not here. Oh, okay. The dog is being looked after by the two Mardukov children. Okay. Chonza's not here? No. Where'd he go?
Starting point is 00:53:03 Do I notice this? Yeah. In the thread? Where's Chaucer and the boy? I forget his name. Erwin looks at you, gives you like a strangled expression, like kind of a bit sad or upset. Danica finally answers you.
Starting point is 00:53:20 He, for lack of a better term, sacrificed himself. Oh. When they first started, she gestures up at the ceiling. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When they first started, he made a commotion that allowed several other people to hide. He called out, screamed at them. They just picked him up and took him away. All right.
Starting point is 00:53:41 Well, I mean, he's a head, so he's probably not dead, but still, thank you. Good to know. Jesker, he's a head, so he's probably not dead. But still, thank you. Good to know. Jesker, he was not here. Claudia had come by to speak to him. They are together somewhere. Okay. Hopefully at the orphanage. Apparently that place is fine.
Starting point is 00:53:56 So that's good to know. Owen shakes his head and so does Danica. We thought at first it was okay But it is definitely not That's Yeah that's not good to hear It might have been I think Claudia might have put up a stand Right
Starting point is 00:54:14 It was safe for a while but it is no longer Look regardless We've got to get you to the church So let's get moving Alright so How are you going to keep these people safe can i ask uh i have one last spray shot that i can use how long do i think that would buy me that gives you like a round okay that's five seconds it's not really long six seconds okay you're you're cheating
Starting point is 00:54:42 yourself out of a second there. A whole hot second. Five minutes is how long it'll take to get them to the church. That would be 50 rounds. Okay. All right. Well, I guess me and Kribbit could create a... Can Kribbit... Maybe I turn to Kribbit while we're onto the table.
Starting point is 00:55:01 Kribbit, your musical abilities. I feel silly asking this. Do they work on bats? This one thinks. His voice is a little shaky, and you can tell he's a little rattled. He slips in and out once again of Grong. This is the first time you've seen him slipping in and out of Grong for anything other than excitement.
Starting point is 00:55:22 This time, in fear, he's slipping in and out of Grong. in and out of grung for anything other than excitement yeah this time in fear he's slipping in and out of grung this one does not believe that those ones the bats yes appreciate music right damn when he says those ones yeah from his gesturing you understand that he means the bats yeah yeah but it sounds like all right well then maybe what buildings are around the blue water in standing yes standing there is the blue water and sits on the corner of two main streets the two major streets of valakai so it only has buildings to its north and west they would be to the north immediately is a set of townhouses all nestled together to the west the building you came from is just kind of a an openy sort of airy building
Starting point is 00:56:22 okay that makes sense that Sorry, that didn't. It's just a building with a lot of doors and windows, obviously designed to let air pass through it. It's not a home. It'd be kind of like maybe a smokehouse of sorts. Yeah, okay. Where this place gets some of its food from. All right, I am under the table going to take a diarist wolf heart
Starting point is 00:56:44 out of my little kit I'm going to see if I can scare the bats away with some thunder that's my plan because I can make thunder damage with the diarist wolf heart and if I put that in a grenade and I hurl that to the heavens
Starting point is 00:56:59 maybe it'll give us a little more time as well maybe I'll use some water of the sphinx for a legendaryary Power. And then let's just put it on a Sapphire because I have so many of them, which gives it seeking abilities as well. So I can throw it in the air, it'll seek out a bat,
Starting point is 00:57:16 explode with a thunderous well, a lot of thunderous damage, and then hopefully the Legendary Power will make it affect a great many bats. Alright. You burst out of the door, throw the grenade up into the air, And then hopefully the legendary power will make it affect a great many bats. All right. You burst out of the door, throw the grenade up into the air, kind of with one arm throwing it up, with the other arm sheltering your own head. The grenade soars, sails straight up. And then in a massive radius, you hear a thump as the explosion buffets the bats.
Starting point is 00:57:44 All right. So I don't know if you know this. You know how an explosion hits you harder in water because the water molecules are denser than they are in air? Imagine that the bats are molecules. You feel the wave of pressure
Starting point is 00:58:00 so much harder because it is in the form of bats that strike you. Fuck. All right. The sound is so incredibly deafening that you create a space larger than the explosion itself as bats flee from the sound. With my other hand, I'm just, with the one not protecting my head from bats,
Starting point is 00:58:22 I gesture for everybody to start moving. People start running and screaming as they make their way towards the church. To be continued... fellow adventurer, if you're picking up what we're putting down and want more D&D content, we have just what you need to scratch that itch. D&D is for Nerds Plus, the symbol, not the word, where you can listen to select campaigns that were once only
Starting point is 00:59:14 available to Sandspans Plus members, the further adventures of the Greyhill Free Company if you want shorter campaigns with beautiful guests, and D&D is for Nerds, not Ognot, where all our non-canon D&D adventures go to rest. Just search for D&D is for Nerds on your favourite podcast app of choice and join us on this epic quest of D&D podcast discovery.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.