D&D is For Nerds - Vampire Infested Barovia II #16 An Understandable Fear of Puppets

Episode Date: August 19, 2023

The party make their way out west and curse the name Blinsky. Hecktor sees a big goat while Pip reasons that you can never be too careful when it comes to marionettes.Want ad-free and even more bonus content? Just check out Imagination Adventures+ on our website or on Apple Podcasts! Music by the ever wonderful Lepidora, you can check out her music here. And head to peddlerspress.store to peruse our D&D themed merch store and help support the show! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Though you see no water for miles around you, you are, like me, nonetheless maroon. We are castaways in this terrible bad dream somebody decided to name Barovia. To switch up the metaphor, we are imprisoned, and the fog is the bars of our cell, and our jailer is Baron Von Strahd. As far as I can tell, there's no way to escape other than possibly by dying. Maybe by being eaten by a wolf let's say sweet yep we'll head back up solar and head on to the road the old is it the old spallet road yep oh spallet road excuse me road you make your way west oh wait i'm getting you to roll the

encounter die don't i i think so yeah would both of getting you to roll the encounter die, don't I? I think so. Would both of you like to roll for the first day? No. Each? Yeah. Eighteen. Oh, Jack. Seven, roll really low. Eight. That's better.

Okay, Jack, can you roll again, please? Oh, and add a d8. You want to add them together. What am I doing now? Well, you've got an encounter, now let's find out what it is. I'm rolling so many dice! 11 and 4, which equals... 15.

Oh, 15, right, right, right, right, right. Jack. There's a reason Adam does all the math. Yeah, maybe I'll do it from now on. Somehow, when I did that, my brain was like, you're rolling percentile? Who knows what the hell is going on there? In the first day, you make your way back to the Lunar River crossing and over it, you're halfway, sorry, I should say, between the Lunar River crossing

and then the pathway where you need to turn off to head to Argenvostolt. At around there, this would be towards the end of the day, and the pathway where you need to turn off to head to Argenvostolt. Oh, yeah. At around there, this would be towards the end of the day, you can see up ahead of you on the trail, there is a person stuck in a tree. They're not moving. A tree? Yeah.

A tree near the road. Well, the Spallage Woods is always kind of on the brink of swallowing up the path. But this tree is particularly close to the trail. Close enough that the person in the tree is kind of dangling over the road. They're in a branch, but it's, because you're seeing it from a distance away, it's hard to tell exactly what you're looking at here. They aren't moving, that's all you know. A tree.

Do I think the tree is, uh, do I recall it from passing through here days past? I know it's been a while. Quite a while ago, yeah. You, you know what, yes. You rolled pretty well, and you've been in Barovia for a little while now.

You've seen this tree a few times and it's, I wouldn't describe it as a very remarkable landmark, but you certainly do remember the tree that is pretty constantly blocking your path as you walk through the road. This is not a new tree, yes. Also it's

simply too big to be a blight. So this is where we also found the other Barovian slumped over a... That would have been at the river crossing. So you're a little bit beyond it. Yeah, you're a bit beyond it. You're about halfway between the river crossing and where

Argenvostolt, or the path to turn off for Argenvostolt is. Okay, okay. Do I have any idea what this could be, just from a glance? Is this ringing any bells? You're really far away, you'd have to get closer. So they just slumped over a branch, right? They're kind of hanging in the tree. They're kind of, yeah, hanging in the tree.

Imagine if the branch forks in two directions and someone's not hung, but imagine they're like the tree is holding them up. Look, it's nothing at a first glance, but whatever it is, it's not going to be good

is this a warning a threat we are approaching someone throws certainly prepare one way or another for a fight

is there giants in Barovia I've never seen a giant in Barovia but honestly it wouldn't shock me there's all kinds of things here I didn't know there were trees well I knew there were trees but I didn't know

there were tree ants. All right, I think we'll approach, or maybe I'll approach cautiously to try and get a gauge of what I'm actually dealing with. You approach to a point where... Oh, you've got to get really close to do this. Unfortunately, maybe the corpse is facing in a way in such that it's really hard to see until you get right up to it. You need to get basically next to the corpse.

But by then you can tell that it's actually not two prongs of a tree, it's three. The person is skewered on the middle prong. And when you get close enough as well, you can see they've been skewered with many crossbow bolts. Oh. Can I tell anything from the bolts? Maybe I'm yelling back. Crossbow bolts. Not a monster?

You pull out one of the crossbow bolts. It looks like just a crossbow bolt. The person is dressed like any other normal Barovian. They have a satchel bag, which they're still wearing, and it's dangling, swaying in the breeze and with the movements of the trees. Aside from that, you can see they have a dagger at their belt, which they never got to draw for whatever reason. And they've been here for a little while,

but not long enough that they've started rotting. How far up are they in the tree? A bit far up. If you do a little jump, you can get to their chest. That's how high up they are. So it's not like, say, if a were-raven was flying and someone shot them with a bunch of bolts, they impaled them. That's not as high up.

Well, it would be a very weird way to get impaled. Can I chart the arc of the crossbows back to where they would have come from, assuming that this person was shot after being hung in the tree? Looks like someone on the road would have pelted them or some people on the road. Are crossbows a pretty typical weapon for Barovia? Yeah, it's a popular weapon in Barovia. The expertise to use a longbow is not very common in Barovia and crossbows are considered a very easy to use but powerful weapon.

It's not striking me, unless this fella, I point to him in the tree, is about to jump and come to life. It's not striking me as anything obviously Emmanuel related but it's definitely something I mean it's always hard to tell if it's

something we should be worried about or just part of the rich tapestry that is Barovia. I say I have your wits about you. Yeah, look, I scan the horizon and then yell back out. Do you need help getting them down? Why would we get them down? Bury them. I think you might do more harm than good if they are alive or undead.

Just seems like the situation is going to be we pull them out of the tree alright yeah look I probably will need help getting it out of the tree if that's our plan yeah no if it just seems

it's undignified that's for sure is there anything in the satchel? yeah as I like I start walking over is there anything in the satchel any identity look at them.

Do they look like any person we've ever met? Or are they just kind of like one of the many people at Borofia? They're not anyone you recognize, no. They don't necessarily... Yeah, they don't look like anyone important. If you... I don't mean like... Big loser under you.

They don't look like they were anyone rich. Okay, we value people by how wealthy. Hey, did I say or? Were there going to be more options there? I don't know. I couldn't tell. I can't remember. I was too busy interrupting, so I don't know, Adam.

They don't look like they're the leader of a town, a burgomaster, or a captain of the guard, or... No, those are it. No one else could be important. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you grab the satchel and you bring it down, you find inside the satchel are some rations, maybe three sets of rations. The wrappings and some other stuff that indicates that they probably had some more rations, which they have since consumed. You find a very rudimentary map of Barovia,

which leads from the village of Barovia to Krezik. And you find maybe some other small effects, some jewelry for a... It would be hard to say, just like nondescript, maybe two nondescript rings and a necklace that could be anyone's. Does it look like they're valuable? Because they're... The two rings would be made out of an inexpensive bronze and the necklace would be made out of just string and stone.

Okay. Because I'm like, well, they didn't rob him for their... No, yeah. ...valuables. That's true. But then I'm like, well,'t rob him for their valuables. That's true. It's just stone and string. Maybe they wouldn't have. Maybe there was something more valuable in here they took. And then finally

you find a jester marionette. Like a marionette, a little puppet that is of a jester. The smiling jester marionette with tangled strings

and tiny copper bells sewn into its cap. If you inspect it, you see written on the little, I don't know what you call it, but the thing where you control the marionette. The winding cog. Or the handle.

The wooden cross. Oh, right. Sorry. That part that has the strings attached or whatever. Written on that, you see, is no fun, is no blinsky. Little guys. What? Little guys.

Puppets are dangerous. How big is it? The puppet? Yeah. It's about the size of a toy. I don't know how to describe. About as tall as a hand. I pull out a manual.

I, like, maybe put my hand on you and push you back to, like, away from the puppet. Little guys, comma, puppets, as described in the Tales of Pinocchio. A puppet is, in fact, not a real boy, and as such, it is not a real boy. This book that claims the bestest method of delivery of such information, information pertaining to the details of if one is encountering a puppet little guy or just a regular little guy, i.e. puppet, is to say it that there is no capable way to the telling of the difference, I give like a hmm,

telling the difference between a puppet that shall fight and a puppet that shall not. Once suitably surprised, the puppet, heretofore referred to by its common name of Carionette, will attempt to prick the victim with its deadly silver pin. Can I see a silver pin attached to this puppet? You do not see a silver pin attached to the puppet,

no. I've already withdrawn my mace, basically. If the puppet pricks you, you will become the puppet, and the puppet will become you. Classic puppet shit. Can I grab the puppet out of the satchel? Or do I already have it out of the satchel?

You have it in your hands now, I'll say. I'll throw it on the ground and plug it twice. When you load the crossbow and point it at the doll, the doll's little hands go up. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Knew it. You open fire still? I'm not letting this fucker come and get me. It said, what?

You want to be a puppet? I don't know. No. I'm killing this puppet. It said to not. That's exactly what a puppet would say. He's not wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm killing this fucking puppet. It's unarmed? Yeah, if it's got a little silver tip, it pricks you with that. And then, freaking... You don't know what we're dealing with. Part of me wants to move your crossbow so you miss but also you are the monster hunter It's just fucked up that

you're shooting a puppet Once pricked the victim shall find that it is the victim upon realising that it is cursed in the lesser. Once cursed in the lesser the victim who should know they is the victim by now should be clever to kill the carrionette straight away because they are likely, though not liable as my editor says Hear that? So what if that's him? I point to the dead body.

You're not having this conversation right now. He's filling it full of lead. Tarpos goes first. When you lock and load, Tarpos puts up a hand and says, Ah, and then it's your turn. What if it is the... Oh, that's right.

You plug. I plug it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Two crits. It's going to be fucking dusk. This poor puppet. This poor puppet. This poor puppet.

If given a chance. If given a chance, the puppet would be you. What if it's already someone else? What if the puppet is already someone else? This is that person. It's too late. It's too late. This puppet's dead.

Our carrier net has all the standard weaknesses that any puppet in the norm might have Emmanuel is it fire fuck all right let's do these two critical hits pray for a high number high high high high high that's 44 so you fucked it the first one

is table 22 triple damage and if it was a melee attack it was not unfortunately still triple damage

I'll take what would have happened if it was melee they need to make a strength saving or an athletics check or it

increases to quadruple damage oh my god. That is, you deal, your first one deals 30 points of damage. You really hate these fucking puppets.

You can't fucking stand these little guys. You gotta kill a puppet. You see a puppet, you kill a puppet. See a puppet, kill a puppet. Second one a puppet, you kill a puppet. See a puppet, kill a puppet. Second one, in the knee, maximum damage. Your second one does 13 points of damage. You have never been more on your game.

You destroy the little carrionette. It's gone. It's destroyed. Dead. It turns to dust. Right. That was terrifying. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. You're telling me. Okay, I kick the dust and kind of spread it around could that have been adjusted to the person who's carrying it was he pricked or was he about to prick us

well I yeah I look I didn't want to risk it evidently I've never wow okay sorry about that okay sort of lost my mind a little bit sort of Okay. Evidently. I've never. Wow. Okay. Sorry about that. Okay. Sort of lost my mind a little bit. Sort of. He's a little on edge.

The little guy is dead. So that's, I mean, that's a good thing. We can bury your friend now, I say in gesture to the guy. Oh, right. Right. Yes. Right. Yes.

I hope you get it down. Dig a grave. Dig a shallow grave, I guess. Say a few words. Bury the corpse. We move on. Bury it. Get back on the horse and keep going.

All right. A little bit further, you see a fire on the side of the trail. This would only be a kilometer further along. It's quite close, actually. But by sunset, you can see, yeah, there's a, off to the side of the Slavich Road, you can see that there is a campsite and there are four Barovians sitting around a campfire. I'm about to find out I did something

really bad. Is it best to keep going or? They, as you approach, seem just as tense as you are. All four of them get up and you see they're armed with crossbows ah i see uh like maybe just like raise my hands to sort of show we mean no harm sort of thing all right they allow you to approach they love they've not they've got the crossbows in their hands but they're not holding them at you yeah perhaps we

can just be like um uh evening everybody uh we we're just passing by and no need to resort to any thing rash welcome uh what are you doing here in the slavish woods we're heading out west ah as are we ah where are you heading to we are heading to Kresik. Oh, right. We're heading to Kuchery. They say bad news out Kuchery way. What's that? It is simply said that it is a cursed place. They don't have any information. They're just like Kuchery is no good.

Why are you going to Kuchery? We have some friends there. Oh, okay. Well, I hope they are fine. Yeah, well, us too. You're heading to Krasik for trade, or? They look among each other. Oh, get a good boy

card, Hector. You both can tell that they're hesitant to give you information. They just don't trust you. It tell that they're hesitant to give you information. They just don't trust you. It's not they're trying to do something surreptitious. They just don't trust you. You don't have to tell us, Isaiah. It doesn't bother me. We just have business there.

Nothing further. Yes, no worries. Isaiah, have you been to Kresik before? They need you to often do something for them. We travel these roads not infrequently. Oh, that's nice. Oh, actually, be wary of a, what do you call them? Little glowing things?

A carionette is the technical term. No, the glowing things. Oh, Willy Wispy. Yes. Oh, Willy Wispies. Yes, we are aware of these creatures. There's one that's been hanging around Krezik recently. If you ignore it, it'll ignore you like a snake. Yes.

We have had to deal with these in the past. Yes, yes. It's hanging around quite close to Krezik, actually. You walk these roads long enough, eventually you learn to… Not listen to the screams from the woods. Yes. Yeah. Yes.

He says, you can see there's a history for him. We're all just like nodding in agreement. But perhaps, I mean, we're looking to bunk down here

would be against, you know, the safety of numbers. They look at all of you. They look, you can see they're,

when they're looking at you, their gaze fixes pretty heavily on well actually all of you are a bit fucking weird Hector I mean as far as weirdness goes you are for them weird but

compared to a dragonborn a grung a at least eleniel eleniel and tarpos they're like well we've seen this before they recognize me being Barovians. Oh, that's a good fucking point.

And also with Elaniel, are they traveling more with like... Elaniel is traveling hooded, yeah, but when Elaniel kind of joins... No, actually, Elaniel would be up the back and they wouldn't be... Yeah, they wouldn't know Elaniel was a Dusk Elf, actually. Yeah.

Hysalos? Hys. Hys? They don't know you. Okay. Not by face, at least. They might know you by name. Yeah, fair enough.

Yeah, and I would say Goroblushen is probably the weirdest among your group. You forget about Goroblushen, yeah. No, there is no reason not to stay in numbers, but perhaps we keep two separate camps, but next to each other. Yeah, no, that's a gross. Absolutely. Are you traders by any chance?

We have some goods to trade, yes. Do you have any... What a suspicious question to ask on a dark, lonely road. Oh, I was just wondering if you had anything to trade. That is all. Not a lot of trade happens on the Slavic road. I was just wondering if you had anything to tread. That is all. Not a lot of tread happens on the Slavich road. You must be new. Oh, he is.

Have you gotten the spiel? He doesn't say that. I'm not. We have some things to tread, yes. Do you take, is it gold or is it more barter uh we would take some gold

depending may i see your coins oh what do you have to have you might not have anything we need let us keep things formal they show you they have mostly for the most part they have seeds that they're selling but they would also have some other simple trade goods. Well, not trade goods, sorry. They would have some other simple utensils and things like that for cultivation, so like hoes and rakes, maybe some pickaxes and shovels as well. What kind of seeds they have?

Any boring vegetable you could name. I was wondering if they had any fruit seeds. No, they wouldn't have fruit. It'd be, we're talking beetroot, we're talking potatoes maybe. They have turnips, beetroot, of course turnips. Turnip, beetroot, carrot, radish, parsnip. Okay.

And that would probably be it. I'm just thinking it's for like, you know, Eleni's little veggie patch back home. Oh, actually, potatoes. They have potatoes. Yeah, that's okay. I guess we won't be doing any gardening soon. Oh, and a cow, actually.

Yeah, that would be part of their camp. You might have only just noticed it as you got closer. But, yeah, there's a cow. Oh, you have a cow. We wish to trade in Krezak. Of course, of course. Maybe I just like... They're kind of using the cow as a...

A buffer. I know, a beast of burden. But they're willing to trade it for the right price. Of course. Are you going over and investigating the cow? Are you looking at the cow? No, I was going to go to Eleniel and ask if they would like anything vegetable-wise for their veggie patch.

Eleniel shakes her head. I do not like cultivated plants, she says. I thought I would ask. Cool. It's basically like gardening utensils. Yeah. Hose, rakes,

shovels, that sort of stuff. Shovel? Nah. You did just dig a... Yeah, it might be nice to have a shovel. That probably would have been a fucking hassle to do, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Actually, maybe I'm like, how much for the shovel? Give me one tick.

They would be selling it for two gold, which is quite a markup. But there's not a lot of opportunity to buy things. I'll look at Pip. I'll buy the shovel. Give him two gold and then I'd like to with the shovel turn to you, Hector, and be like thank you for the honey and to give to you the shovel. I appreciate it.

I make the next grave you dig. And hopefully we don't have to dig too many. Put it in my pack thank you everybody so much I guess we'll keep going oh you can see as well something that they've not

really spoken about but now that you've been conversing and now that you've seen the cow especially actually you can see that there is a body wrapped in a shroud which has been placed in a position on the cow so that the cow is carrying it. Oh, I see. So the poor bastard on the tree back there, is that you guys?

They look at each other and nod slowly. Yes, that was us. He was one of ours. Oh, one of yours. They kind of do like a gesture of like puppetry. Was it puppet-ish? What happened to him? Why did you shoot him with arrows?

Why did he get shot with arrows if it wasn't you? They gesture at the corpse in the shroud. He killed one of us. Oh, I see. Oh, that's terrible. It is a terrible crime, kin killing. So we did what we needed to do. Was it sudden?

He sort of turned to murder? Yes. It was very unexpected. I have traveled with him for many years now. He killed his brother. I like look at Pip. Whoops. Sorry for your

loss. I'm deeply sorry for what happened. They're not. Anyway. They're staring at me. It's probably time for bed. Yes, time for bed. I'll take first watch. Okay.

You just can't be too careful. You and one of their group take first watch. They obviously don't trust you to take watch. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it would have lasted one of their group take first watch. They obviously don't trust you to take watch. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's better to watch than one of them. So the two of you just sit on either side of the fire and make small idle talk. After maybe a few hours deep into the night,

can I get you to make, to roll the encounter dice? Nine. Nine, did you say? Nine. Yeah, all right. That's an encounter. No, it's not. Or is it?

No, your watch goes by uneventfully. Now encounters happen on an eight and above. Well, encounters are a lot more likely at night, but you're on the road, so they're not almost guaranteed. Not yet, at least. All right. You, at some point, switch out with Pip. Pip, can I get you to roll the encounter dice?

One. That's fine. All right. Nice. And then, when you're not point switch out with Pip. Pip, can I get you to roll the Incantadice? One. That's fine. Alright, nice. And then, when you're not on watch... Alright, the night goes by uneventfully. Great. Fantastic. Another rest.

Oh my god. Yeah, another short rest. Kribbit plays his song of rest, and you all recover an extra four hit points tonight. So, by my count, Hector, you're on 53, and Pip, you're on 56. Nearly full of hit points. That's crazy. Almost don't even need the bloody long rest. You can forego it if you want.

I'll let you skip it. Adam, that's so kind of you. This is our last short rest, right? Yeah. Before a big long rest. I'd like to use all the remaining of my hit point dice. I only need, like, what, 13 health? I'll use three of my dice.

I mean, you might as well. Might as well, yeah. Absolutely. You are on full hit points. Hell yeah. And Pip, you have one left. Yeah, I'll use it. Whatever. You are, I think, also...

Oh, no, maybe just off. Just off. You recover another 11 hit points. Yeah, you're one off maximum. Might as well. Yeah, that's basically the same yeah it's basically the same yeah is anyone actually wounded pretty badly because i had um two cure wounds they're bad cure wounds but they're cure wounds they still work yeah do

the trick i don't think anyone's going to be too wounded after this because yeah you're absolutely right why not just use all of your thing I mean actually I think I don't think anyone here does but I think some people can get abilities that spend these I should absolutely give you a magical item that spends your

hit dice that stop letting that make us gamble I know but it's scary it's scary make us gamble I know But it's scary Actually I think I know exactly what I'm doing It's become real Why are you upset

That I'm going to give you a magical item Because we can't control ourselves We're going to burn through our short rest In seconds It's going to be so good We'll be like it'll be fine No It won't be in seconds. It's going to be so good. I'm so looking forward to it. It'll be fine. It'll be fine. It'll be fine. No. It won't be.

It will be fine, though. Maybe we're different. I think you're special, yeah. I think we're built different. So, the next day, you wake up. At the crack of dawn, those other Barovians are already packing. No, no, no. They're packing up.

They're not special enough to be gone in the morning without you noticing. They're not Burgermasters or rich. Yeah, you're right. You're right. Good point. Okay. Well, I guess with just an idle wave goodbye, we head back on the Stolzfellish Road. We awkwardly head in the same direction.

Did we? Oh, yeah. They're going to Krezik as well. You're going in the same direction. Well, we'll go they're going to Kresik as well. You're going in the same direction. Well, we'll go in the same direction until I guess we're splitting off. Yeah. Did you want to go to Wizards of Wines? How far away?

How off the beaten path? Wizards of Wines. All right. So let me hit you with a little multiple choice option here. Okay. So you can skip Wizards of Wines entirely. Or you can go to Wizards of Wines entirely. Which has two different options.

So going down the trail, getting to Wizards of Wines, and then going back along the path to get to the turnoff for Kuchery. That will take you an extra maybe three, four days. Four days if you're really delayed. Three days, much more likely. Possibly two if you're really quick. Unlikely, but possibly.

Alternatively, if you go to Wizards of Wine, because the path to Wizards of Wine and the path to Kuchery run parallel, instead of going all the way back, you could instead cut through the woods. Dangerous. But if we have, say,

Muriel or one of the other were ravens help, maybe an easy kind of, they can scout ahead, as it were. Sure. Maybe. If they are alive. Yeah. If they are alive and if they are able to help. Yes. And if they're able to help and if they're inclined to help

I mean obviously they owe you a little bit but that might not be enough for them to be like yeah I'll go into the woods with you yeah I'll go die we don't have the hardest sap with us that's being sent through sure

Danica Keening who's going to give yeah. Danica. Oh, Danica, right. Keening, who's going to give it to Danica. I see, yes. Well, we're quite close to the Wizards of Wine if we want to check in on them to see how they're going. I mean, they did help us. It would be almost…

Would you say, what would we do when we got there? It's like three days out of our trip ultimately it is to see how they're going to see if any of them

survived how they're I think I mean ultimately like need to head down to Kutcheri

I mean we could head to Wizard of Wine and perhaps even cut through the also Kresik is still you did still want to go to the

library in Kresik yeah but You did still want to go to the library in Kresok Yeah but that's a kind of Sure alright We could send somebody The Wizard of Wines to check it Instead of having to do it ourselves True Someone who's maybe able to

Traverse the woods a little easier That would be Eleniel But sending her on her own is not very safe Or Tarpos. Or Tarpos, yes. Tarpos could go with Gorob Lushen. They would move pretty quick. But then Gorob Lushen is loud. Yeah, there's a

high chance of them getting an encounter. Eleniel, on her own, if she has an encounter, it's going to be really bad. But she's quite fast, and you need to only send her. Gorob Lushen and Tarpos, a lot safer if an encounter happens,

a lot more likely to have an encounter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is true. I mean, look, if you would like... Send Crippit. Me and, well, me and, say, Eleniel, we could take Sola, we could dash down while you take the road up to Kushiri,

and we could cut through and meet you there. Sola will not travel through the forest well. You would know this as well. A horse is not going to move very quickly through a forest. Yeah. Yeah. Eleniel looks at you and says, what if this? What if the frogman, he needs someone to keep him on the...

She turns her body so that Kribbit can't see her talking properly. Kribbit leans a little bit. The frogman needs someone to keep him on the straight and narrow. What if myself and Kribbit, accompanied by the gentleman we're with currently, make our way to Krezik? and Kribbit, accompanied by the gentlemen we're with currently, make our way to Krezik. Krezik would not have me or probably the frogman, but that's okay because we only need to go to the Abbey.

Correct. We go to the Abbey. We skip Wizards of Wine because, frankly, I don't want to go there, she says. And we'll just meet you in Kutry. And then on the way back, you can go to Wizards of Wine. Sounds good to me. Sounds good. Actually, yes. Then at least we skip having to go to Kuchery. And then on the way back, you can go to Wizards of Wine. Sounds good to me. Sounds good, actually, yes. Then at least we skip having to go to Kresik. Alright. Yes, we can do that.

I can, so long as you are within the Slavich woods, I can communicate with you. So... You can send a messenger, yes? I can do many different types of messages. Yes.

Once when you're within the woods, you are connected to me, whether you know it or not. Really? All right. Well, cause I am also in the woods. She says, uh, the woods are much smaller than you might imagine when you think about it in the right way. She says, okay. Is there a, it in the right way, she says. Okay. What is the best way to contact you if we need to?

Perhaps you cannot contact me unless I begin contacting you. So perhaps, let's say, every two days, head into the woods at sunset. Be in the woods at sunset and I will contact you. Alright. Can do. Well if what you want to be looking for in the library? Anything on the Amber Temple?

There is definitely Are you taking notes Cribbit? Cribbit gives Eleniel a very hurt look and says, always. So you're looking for anything on the Amber Temple? Amber Temple. Yes, and I don't know how to tell you this without telling you this,

but you cannot say this name. Kribbit knows name he can't say. You do, you do. Kribbit has a big list of name he can't say. You do, you do. Kribbit has big lists of things he can't say. He flips his book open to several pages and you can see anytime someone has said to Kribbit, don't say that,

he has written it down. You can see a few times he's written Father Lemick. I just like, you need to rip that out of your page, rip it out of your book. I just like, you need to rip that out of your page, rip it out of your book. I start putting my backpack down,

grabbing a few things, looking around. Kribbit defensively closes his book. Getting some incense. Yender tried to burn book once. What happened? Yender clearly was like, oh well, it's not happening. This one

showed Yender. Yender said Kribbit oh, well, it's not happening. This one showed Yender. Yender said Kribbit was abomination and to burn book. Nothing's happened so far. I start like incense and just like burning, like maybe like a sacred flame to burn something like the incense or whatever. I understand nothing has happened yet, but you do not, don't write that name down. Kribbit needs to know names of things he can't say.

Otherwise he might forget and say it. Better to have it written down than said out loud. Krivit gets engaged in story. Krivit, I want... Don't open your book to that page again. Do not show anybody that page. Please. Please.

Okay. Krivit says, you don't have a lot of faith in the okay but you think it's the best you're gonna get i look at eleniel please i will keep him under wraps eleniel says i'd like to uh crash down i'd like to crash down to kribbit and be like right uh let me explain the book that you're looking for and then i'd like to explain to him or describe to him the book that I hid from everybody when we were there the first time. It's very funny. He draws an exact picture of the book in his book. Like this.

Yeah, almost identically. That's what you're looking for. Kribbit, get this book for you. Important for story. Yeah. And any book that covers the same topics. You know that Keening has been to that library, so obviously he missed that book,

but you don't think he would have missed much else. Okay, so you think that's kind of the book. That might be the only thing worth looking for, yeah. But anything to do with demons and devils, and what did both Woken and Lady Watcher said something about? Dark places. Anything to do with dark places. Dark places.

Elaniel gives Krobat a look and says, you know, he means more than just a dark place. Oh. Other places like this shithole, I say, and gesture, like just around us. Okay. But by this shithole, I mean the whole of Barovia. I see how this is complicated. No, Kribbit understands. Okay, all right.

Kribbit is well... Fell. Oh, no. Kribbit is well-learned from college. Yes. All right. Yes, anything with demons, devils in particular, you know. learned from college. Yes. All right. Yes. Anything with demons, devils in particular, you know.

Kribbit learned how to cite sources. Kribbit learned how to do research. All right. Fantastic. Well, good luck. Good luck, Sola. Must include date. Does he say that to me?

Yes. Kribbit gives like a, I don't know how you describe the gesture, but like a... Yeah. Like a handout. Kind of, I wouldn't call it fully patronizing, but at least a little. Yeah. That's very accurate. Yeah.

Okay. Eleniel says, I assume we will probably meet, if not in Kutry, then perhaps somewhere on the Slavic road. Look after yourselves. Eleniel gives you a side glance and doesn't really properly respond to that. You too. It would be sad if your story ended and I was not there to write about it. I'm going to turn and start heading down there. You could have just ended that

sentence six or seven words a little bit earlier. Good luck. There's fun in that. I don't know. Just like nod. Hand on shoulder to Elenio. Good luck as well.

Can I get you to roll an encounter die each? That nice? Nine. Alright, you get to the Raven River crossroads and then where Eleniel, Krebbit and those four Barovians head west

towards Krezik, you instead head south along a well-worn but very disused road. Traveling down it, the day is largely uneventful, which you thank your lucky stars for, but the two of you are able to spot that there is... I would say that maybe this is more of a thing for you, Pip, rather than you, Hector.

Hector, you're still quite new to these lands, so you don't notice how odd or interesting it is, Pip, that this part of the Slavic road has a well-worn set of grooves in it from a wagon going up and down, or several wagons going up or down, taking the same path every single time. This is, it denotes a level of use that you did not realize was... Existed in Barovia. Yeah, existed in this part of Barovia especially. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Why are they taking it to the Raven River Crossroads? That's very weird. Well, I don't really say much about it. Maybe like idly to myself, I'm like, wagon wheels, huh? But other than that, I don't bring it up with the rest of the group. You travel a little bit down that road and then you start getting into Mount Gacchus. It starts becoming mountainous terrain. You're pretty constantly going up and up and up.

It's an exhausting slog of a walk. At about that time, the weather slowly, miraculously, begins to clear. Whoa. Getting like fur, pulling in tight. Oh, never mind. Never mind. That's good. It shuts off. fur-cleaned. Oh, never mind. It's lightly clouded. There's obviously at no point you're never going to encounter clear skies

in Barovia. But this is about as sunny as it gets. The cold still bites at you though. It's just a very still cold. When you get high enough, you can see from the side of Mount Gacchus, you can see down into the Wizards of Wines, very, very distantly, far enough away that you really only know that it would be there.

It just kind of looks like a clearing to us. Yeah, you can't see any buildings. Yeah, basically, it would just be a big clearing for you. Yeah, no worries. And then maybe you can see the tops of the buildings of Krezic, or the walls of Krezic, actually. There's no very tall buildings there. Yeah, no worries. And then maybe you can see the tops of the buildings of Krezic, or the walls of Krezic actually. There's no very tall buildings there. Yeah, yeah. And then the abbey itself.

Hmm. It's a... The... You didn't realize how much extra height mattered. The extra height of the treants the last time you were coming through here. You didn't realize how much that mattered. Yeah, for sure. Anyway, the sun begins setting, and you're going

to have to sleep here on the side of the mountain it there's not a lot of room yeah you will need to sleep on the road itself yeah okay well i assume what do the wagon wheels come up the mountain like yeah they track up the mountain here as well do they look fresh like i know it's kind of hard to tell with wagon wheels but I wouldn't say that you're like, oh, this is fresh. But you also are like, well, it's kind of still recent. Yeah, it's not old. It looks like we're going to have to camp here on the side of the mountain. We'll just camp in the middle of the path.

These wagon wheels, somebody's coming consistently down here. Oh, right. Some kind of watch, a permanent watch is probably a good idea. Yes, we put a... No, fires are not... Yeah, not on the side of the mountain. Should we light a bigger fire? Yes! A big fire! Fire!

Fire! Fire! We should really have left him with Millennial and Krubert. I look at him as, well, was that Gorub or was that Lushen? That was Gorub and Lushen together Tarpos plugs her ears Or plugged her ears while it was happening Is there anywhere I guess

Mountainous and snow In Kandor In Kandor yeah There would be some of the Some of the southern parts Like North Hallow And Fairburn Point, would get snow pretty regularly.

Okay, so I would be like, you know, understand about, like, say, an avalanche. Sure, yeah. Yeah, cool, cool, cool. Looking at Gorban Lushen and then looking up towards the mountain and just wait and watch for any movement. You see movement, but it's not a snowdrift. Oh. You see a creature. It's not a snowdrift. Oh. You see a creature.

It's only just a brief second. A creature, perhaps a goat, perhaps a deer, something with horns. It moves in the distance, and your brain has only enough time to recognize that it was massive, and then it's gone. Hey, Pip. Yeah. Where was that goat again? Sangzor? The gigantic goat that lives in Mount Gekas?

Mount Gekas. I think I saw it. Can I look where? It's gone now. Yeah, how far away did I think I saw it? How far away did I saw it, mister? Hey, mister. Yeah, with my papers. How far away did I saws it, mister? I missed him. Yeah, with my papers.

How far away did I saws it? Hard to say exactly, but anywhere between 800 feet to a mile? Is 1,000 feet a mile? I think so. I don't know. I don't know, Imperial. I don't know Britain numbers. Roughly.

Give it to me in football fields. Is that American numbers? Well, isn't a football field like 100 feet? I don't know. I don't. Yeah, I don't know. All right, hang on. Let me find.

Give it to me in dads. No, hang on. We need dads. Feet to meters. Feet to dads. Let's translate it to a real fucking length. All right. So feet, it's 800 feet is about 250 meters. Or 1,000 feet is...

250 meters. 250 meters. That's so close. That's so close. Or 1,000 feet would be about... Actually, you know what? Yeah, it would be a bit further than that. All right.

Sorry. about, actually, you know what, yeah, it would be a bit further than that. Alright, sorry. So, let's say it's about half a kilometre away, roughly. Still very close. Or 1500 feet, for those of you who I will never understand. Yeah,

it was about half a kilometre away. That's close. Oh my god, fine. It was right next to you. A Gorub and Lushen? A Gorub and Lushen still talking? They're squabbling over some jerky right now.

Shush, shush, shush, shush, shush, shush. I put my finger up at them. Did he just shush us? Yes, I did. Shut up. Shut the fuck up. Everyone quiet. I want to try and listen to see if I can hear Sangzor. Or Did he just shush us? Yes, I did. Shut up. Shut the fuck up. Everyone quiet. I want to try and listen to see if I can hear Sangsor.

Or do I just hear the mountain winds? Yeah, you hear the mountain winds and not much else, unfortunately. Can I give it another look, another hear? You give it another look, you give it another hear. You need this sight nor hear Sangsor. Well, it will definitely know our location. Will it go out of its way to attack? Yeah. Yeah, it's particularly violent.

There is a bounty on its head, though, so you know, if we do survive... Back to the old monster hunting. He's feeling better already. You kill one puppet... You kill one puppet that had a regular guy inside it and he just wanted you to help him. Oh, fuck.

You can never be too careful. Never be too careful. Should have checked the body for a needle. Yeah. It was acting on pure instinct in that moment. Well, yes. I was going to say that there's really no avoiding it if it knows where we are. We can't hide.

We're on the side of a mountain. Is there anything in your manual? No, no. The manual doesn't have an entry on Sazor. In a way, thank God. As far as I know, I mean, the druids consider it sort of. Tapos. Oh, yeah.

Tapos has been obviously quiet this entire time. Looking over to Tapos, you realize she's quiet because you two were talking and she didn't want to interrupt. Sorry, Tapos, of course. Is evil, she says. Maybe corrupted. Strahd. Other than that... Is there any way of uncorrupting it? She shakes her head.

Maybe kill. That is one way, I guess. Let spirits free through holes we make. I gathered that. Pretty funny for Strahd to just corrupt a goat. What is a big goat? Not on purpose, you understand. Oh, just from being in the…

Everything here, evil now, twisted, turned. Right. Oh, yes. At some point, can you just put a bolt through the ears of – I just – Keshka. Keshka's head. Keshka's head, yeah. At some point.

I just don't want to. Would you mind if I did that now? No. You want mutilate? Yeah, I suppose with purpose. But, yeah, I suppose it's mutilation. I'll take the head. She shrugs.

She gives you a big shrug at the word with purpose. I'll take the head. She shrugs. She gives you a big shrug at the word with purpose. I'll take the head. I'll place my crossbow. Tomato, tomato. At the ear and fire it through the head to destroy whatever ear canals remain. Okay. I just like the idea of it now just having an arrow through its head. Yeah, you would actually genuinely have to leave the arrow there because any wound not dealt by...

We'll just have to knit it back together. Yeah, we'll just heal any wound not dealt by the spear. It's easy to carry now, I guess. Yeah, I'll put a bolt through its head now. Good stuff. Thank you, she says. Yeah, you're welcome. Carry handle, she says, holding onto it.

Yeah, yeah. Well, as far as I know, I mean, it's probably one hell of a fight, but it is just a goat, right? A very big goat. I was about to ask if there are any weaknesses, but if I gave it as a goat, then, well. Again, a man you will never hide tough, hard to pierce, but is still nothing special, Like, no tougher than maybe

bear. Oh, okay. Hide no tougher than bear. Bloodhorn could kill bear. Not hard. Do you need a magical weapon to get past anything?

Couldn't hurt. Magical weapon may be best, but any weapon hurt. Good. That's good. That is good. Must watch out. All goats good at climb. Sangzor supernatural good.

Best at climb. I look up. Sangzor upside down if need be. I see. Just look at the highest point near us. If we are on a cliff face, looking up to see a goat on its side, looking at us with these weird fucking cube eyes. Uh-oh. You, once again, scan, looking maybe now,

and this time you look in places where you wouldn't have assumed you could have seen a goat. You still don't see any sight of Sangzor. If he is plotting your demise, it's maybe a longer sort of plan. Is it intelligent or is it one of those sees us and strikes? No, it has some intelligence. So it would want us to...

Could lay trap if needed. Right. And it might want us to go to sleep. Good. Does like to kill when asleep. Yes. Probably high chance she points up Boulder. Oh, I see.

How Sangsor kill adventurers. Druids come up, collect what remains. Very dented things. Yeah, they would be. Well, then perhaps we push through the night. Avoid giving Sangzor the chance. Tapas shrugs. Could.

Further along. Might take a while, though. But further along is eventually buildings, structures, bridges in between first peak and second. Somewhere we could, yeah. Long trip, though, all through night. I do not think we... Well, I just worry that if we set up even with a watch, you know, the time between lookout there's a boulder and being squashed by a boulder. Well, in that case, let us...

Would not be able to see in dark. No what if we just scattered the tents then thanks all big push big boulder all right we'd have to scatter them pretty far yeah and then all that would serve to do is we might not know that a ally of ours was squished until the morning do you think of not making it as an easy target? We could keep pushing at least until not so precarious. Yes, let us go. I don't think we need to go for the whole night. I think we need to rest.

Alright, you push on, trying to find a more opportune place to camp. Can I get you to make another encounter check? A nighttime encounter. Eight. All right.

You're fine. Oh, baby, we're good. You make it a bit further along. There's eventually the path becomes a bit switched back. It goes back and forth and it gets really steep. You thought it was steep before, but by the end of this, your calves are on fire. Oh my God.

But you eventually get to a point where you're no longer, it's still, there are still higher points around you, but they're not like right above you, not right at you. It's more of a gradual slope upwards. It would be difficult to get squished with a boulder here. Well, a boulder still could be pushed. Not impossible. Yeah, yeah. It'd be difficult to get squished with a boulder here. Well, a boulder still could be pushed, but not impossible. It'd be a bit harder.

I mean, with bleary eyes kind of like... I assume there's snow at this point as well, this high up. It is cold, but it's not snowing. It's actually just cold. Actually, it is very fucking cold, though.

You begin needing to huddle up for warmth, and you feel like it's beginning to get to a point where if you don't light a fire, you might start freezing. Yeah, freezing. Do either of you have any special resistances to cold? No. No. Resistances to fire?

I have resistances to necrotic and radiant, and I am immune to cold. No. Resistances to fire. Resistances to necrotic and radiant. And I am immune to disease. Tarpos does not seem to be bothered at all by this. She kind of evolved in such conditions. She is fine. But yeah, you two and Gorob Lushen will start taking levels of exhaustion if you don't find a fire. Let's hunker down.

This is the best we have right now. It is not perfect, but I don't think anything is. If we're not pushing through the night, then we might as well stop before we die. And you're going to light a fire? Someone's going to need to collect wood. Hang on. I'd like to kneel down and make something to warm myself.

So I can go into the forest and collect wood. Okay. So I'd like to take some lichen hide. Trying to find something that gives me fire damage. Some poltergeist screams. Uh-huh. And shambling moss. And I would like to make from that like a warming cloak.

Using the fire damage to... I will allow that I will give you, you can make one roll, this will give you enough time to make one roll to scrounge for wood do you want everyone else, do you want to split into a group of assuming

counting Gorub and Lushen because they can't split up counting Gorub and Lushen as one person do you want to split into a group of three or two groups of two? A group of three and one or two groups of two, sorry, is what I meant. Well, Tarpos is probably the best

trying to find wood themselves. Maybe two groups of two? Yeah. All right. So Gorub, Lushen, and Hector, you are on your own on the path while Tarpos and Pip, you set off. Do you want to...

So one of you is assisting the other one with this role. Do you want to be the one doing the assisting, or do you want Tarpos to assist you? What kind of a role would this be? It's a survival check to scrounge for wood. Do I have survival as a saving throw? I do. I'll make the check because I have a good boy card

to double my proficiency bonus until the start of my next turn. Well, Tarpos then gives you advantage on this roll and you double your proficiency bonus so it is a oh, it's already doubled as well.

Why is it doubled? I don't know why. I've just got a times two here. Nice. I'm guessing you have expertise. Yeah. Yes, yes, I do, actually. I do.

All right. So it's nine plus another three is plus 12 to this roll. Oh, yeah. You find enough wood But like just barely Oh my god That's an advantage It's so much working in my favor You've rolled so poorly

That's so funny You rolled a one and a six You find just enough wood You find enough wood that you're like Alright this will get us through the night And I hope it isn't cold tomorrow. It'll do. Whatever.

We'll start marching back through the snow and make a little fire. All right. How did you and Goroblushen keep warm, Hector? Cuddle. You might have to. Well, I guess either we were like huddling in somewhere under, in like a little alcove or something There's no alcove unfortunately

Anything that there might provide any kind of shelter behind anything Under a tree? Yeah, you could have maybe a really big tree sheltered by that, sure At least to protect you a little from the wind Unfortunately I'm going to have to make you both make a

constitution saving throw to not take a level of exhaustion. That's fine. Alright, you get an at 20. You don't get a good boy card out of it because it's a saving throw, but you do 6-8. Goroblushan. I believe they're also okay. Yeah, they've got a good con.

Yeah, you're both fine. That's good. He's like stamping their feet. Frosty breath. Frosty breath. They better be back soon. Frosty hair. Top Boss and Pip return with the firewood, and you... Takes a whole group to make a stew.

All right, it takes you a while, but you make a fire. Okay. Oh, that is getting... Biting. Biting. Okay. Can I get is getting... Biting. Biting. Okay. Can I get one more encounter check as you bed down for the night? Samit.

Samit, can you roll... I got a nine eight. Yeah, can you roll with the D8, please? What are you, an idiot? Oh, my God. We're in big boy trouble. High swings. Yeah. What'd you get? What's that, 20? 21. Oh my god We're in big boy trouble High is fine What'd you get?

What's that, 20? 21 High is good 21? Adam, no, actually it's fine, I think Actually, I think you'll find that Actually, let me do the math really quickly I think it's good, actually

I think something's going to come down I think it's good. I think we're gonna... I think something's gonna come down and shower us with nothing but love and kisses. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck me. No, I think we're gonna get a million dollars. Alright, so. Who takes first watch? I guess Pip. Yeah, I will. And

Tarpos, because you're the ones who are warm. Alright, cool. You and Tarpos are sitting by the fire while the snores, the loud, heavy snores of Goroblushan drown out any chance you could have had at hearing an enemy before you see them.

Out of the darkness, at first it's just a shadow, but then it slowly coalesces into a person, a knight, a man in armor. To be continued... up what we're putting down and want more D&D content, we have just what you need to scratch that itch. D&D is for Nerds Plus, the symbol, not the word, where you can listen to select campaigns that were once only available to Sants Pants Plus

members, the further adventures of the Greyhill Free Company if you want shorter campaigns with beautiful guests, and D&D is for Nerds, not Ognot, where all our non-canon D&D adventures go to rest. Just search for D&D is for Nerds, not Ognot, where all our non-canon D&D adventures go to rest. Just search for D&D is for nerds on your favourite podcast app of choice and join us on this epic quest of D&D podcast discovery.