D&D is For Nerds - Vampire Infested Barovia II #21 Where Adventurers Go To Die

Episode Date: September 23, 2023

The party runs into an old friend as they enter Kutchery. Hecktor finds out how entirely predictable he is while Pip learns something very surprising about Pop.Keep up to date with the Jarren's Outpost Board Game by heading to jarrensoutpost.com or checking out all the links here!Want ad-free and even more bonus content? Just check out Imagination Adventures+ on our website or on Apple Podcasts! Music by the ever wonderful Lepidora, you can check out her music here. And head to peddlerspress.store to peruse our D&D themed merch store and help support the show! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ahem. You're listening to the Sans Pants Network. I've known many evil places in my time, but this realm, called Barovia, is among the most dangerous. A man could drown here, though he wouldn't need any water to do so. This place is ruled by a man, no, more a creature actually, known as Strahd Von Zarovich. It is said that anyone who can slay him will be set free. If they don't die in the attempt, of course. Sangsor hits the dirt.

Tapos throws the spear into the dirt, throws her hands up into the air and starts screaming into the mountains. In exultation, She's very excited. She jumps up and down. You can see that there are tears streaming down her face. She's like ugly crying in happiness. Well, well, well done, Top. Yep. Alia flumped into the snow.

A boulder fell on me. Yeah. How's my girl? How you doing? Yeah, I mean... How do I look? A little fat? A massive bruise on your head?

Do I look alright? Yeah, they've been better. Okay. Yes, yes, my lady! We did it together! We were helping you, of course! You landed the most important blow. You were amazing. Did you see

Gorob Lushen look back at the two of you? Did you see when she pinned her with that crossbow bolt? Pinned Sangzor with the crossbow bolt? I just start nodding, just like Yeah! I recall that. That was very impressive.

She's something. It takes a few minutes, but Tarpos calms down, and then she walks over to Sangsor, puts both of her hands on his head, puts her head to his head, and then whispers some words. You see a bit of Sangsor's, a few of Sangsor's wounds begin healing over. Sangsor kind of jolts up awake,

waking up from bleeding out, and looks around and then just darts down the mountain. So that's it. Sang-Zor knows that we bested it in combat once, never again. Tapos, her hands are a bit bloody from holding Sang-Zor. She smears the blood over her face and says, Zang Zor, leave us now. Never bother us again. Great.

That's good to hear. Okay. Opens option for ritual. What ritual? Curiosity is getting the better of me. Zang Zor knows I am strong. Now I may ride Sangsor. Must go to temple, though.

Which one? Where's that? Will not tell. Secret for druids. Yeah, fair enough. Is it close by? Back down mountain. druids yeah fair enough uh okay is it close by as in do we do you back down now top i will i will help but uh when we leave our kuchari uh i must go to a place of course complete ritual of course

if if we can help in any way it would be Gorom and Lushen almost literally shove you aside. As weakened as they are, they're still quite strong. They shove into you, knock you aside, and fall down to their knees. Of course, my lady, we will help you at this temple. If you need, we will dash the eyes from our very heads so that we may not view the sacred place. Tapos puts up a hand. Not necessary.

Tapos must think. Yeah, well, wouldn't that be a pleasure? Tapos will tell if you can help. Sounds good. Until then, she looks at you. Thank you. Of course. We needed to get rid of the goat anyway, so.

Tapos shrugged. You're welcome anytime, Claret Kiff. You know, two birds, one stone kind of thing, and I started heading up the mountain. Tapos nods. She kind of always understood that you were doing it to help her, but you kind of just said it out loud, I guess. Anyway, you continue up the mountain. Zero attack. Real son of a bitch.

After your fight with Sangzor, Tarpos probably finds, because they've spent both of their shape changes today, so they find a, probably, let's say a goat, and on the goat, that is definitely not particularly happy about the situation, but is doing it as a favor to Tarpos. Yeah. You are able to continue your way up the mountain. It's, as I said previously, switch back again and again and again.

It's exhausting work. It's constantly upwards motion. It's you are fucked by the end of this yeah fair but as the sun is setting you do finally reach a crest on mount gackus the one where kutari can be seen imagine you've been going you've been scaling the side of a mountain for several days now imagine getting to the, and then it suddenly becomes flat, almost like a mesa. Cool.

It's quite flat in a lot of directions. There's a lot of undulation to this, but comparatively, it might as well be a mesa. You can see, though, just past Kuchuri, the shadow of Mount Gakus continues upwards until darkness swallows it. You can see the dull lights in the distance that indicate that Kuturi is so tantalizingly close. You can't see any details about the city, not at this distance and in darkness, especially in darkness, to be honest. All you know is that buildings have lights on.

The snow begins to slowly start falling as you make your way over this crest. So it looks like it's going to be another quite cold night. All right. Well, if we, like, hustled, could we get to Kuturi? The sun's basically setting now. Yeah. So you're not getting to Kuturi before dark, but you could get to Kuturi to stay there tonight. And how, let's say, I guess, treacherous would this path

be? It's quite flat now. I guess here we hustle. We'll hustle towards Kuturi. You see one extra light quite much, a lot more closer than Kuturi, bobbing in the darkness. Actually, it wouldn't be bobbing. It would probably just be stationary, maybe swinging slowly. It's on the trail. A little after a little bit, you're able to distinguish that this light is being held. It's a long crooked staff with a lantern held in the end of it.

And it's a man crouched by the side of the road. All right. Well, we'll approach. As you approach, when he hears you, you see the hood turn in your direction. It's just like a hooded, robed man, but he's sitting cross-legged at the side of the road with that lantern on the staff. Arms, arms for the poor. He reaches out a hand. I keep moving.

Flick him a few gold. I keep moving. Flick him a few gold. You flick him or you hand him gold? Okay. As you bend down to give him a gold coin, he grabs you. Oh no. He grabs your wrist and drags you

in close. Follow me. He stands up and then starts wandering off into the darkness. He's taking you off the path. Hector? Might be Peter. Okay. Alright. Okay. Alright. Yeah, I'll follow you into the darkness.

But I'll maybe have my hand on my crossbow in case we're just about to be robbed or whatever. There's light forested areas around Kutri. You are being led into one of those forested areas. You can see around the outskirts of Kutri as well. There are several farmsteads. You get a much better view of them than you're getting of the town because you're quite a lot closer.

You see a, I would say maybe a pig farm. You can, in the darkness, just vaguely make out the many bodies of pigs in a field and then the building nearby. With dark vision, does it help? Well, it's got a limit of 60 feet or 120 feet. make out the many bodies of pigs in a field and then the building nearby. With dark vision, does it help? Well, it's got a limit of 60 feet or 120 feet. Yeah, you've got a limit of 60 feet. So unfortunately, a lot of this stuff is occurring well beyond your dark vision range. The man leads you into a wooded area nearby that pig farm.

And then there's this massive boulder that kind of dominates a slight rise in in the terrain the man leads you up to the boulder turns back and says you will wait here i will fetch a friend of yours yes thank you he wanders into the darkness you have about i'd say half an hour yeah yeah it's looking more and more like it's going to be Pyrrhon. Where's Mildred? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The man comes back half an hour later, sure enough, with Pyrrhon in tow. Pyrrhon, as he approaches, takes the hood off his head and says, Ah, the two of you. Pleasure. I wasn't expecting you so soon. I got your message.

Oh, the one We sent by animal. Yes. Yes. I was surprised to hear from you, to be honest. I mean, I understood or I assumed that you were still alive, but I know it's been a while. Yes. A lot has happened. A lot has happened.

Yes. I guess we take this moment to fill each other in. Is there somewhere out of the cold we can have this conversation? Yes, just one moment. He turns to the old man. Thank you. Stabs him in the chest. Was that 100% necessary?

Yes. Yes, it was. It's alright. He's betraying me. When? Now? He was going to go to the authorities and inform them of your arrival. Just like a long sigh and then, okay, where to? Can you help me move the body? He picks up one end.

You pick up the other end. Tapos, as you're doing this, looks uncertainly around the group like she is not 100% sure that this is kosher. As you're moving, Tarpos says, how you know, how he know right. What? She's kind of talking to Pyrrha, actually.

How man know, old man know you two? No. No, no, no. I just told the beggar to do this to the first person who gave him money. How long has he been out there? Since you sent the message. Okay. Yeah, that makes sense.

I needed someone disposable because I wanted to – well, I don't want anyone to know that you're here. That's something I was curious about. I mean, as you might imagine, on the way in here, we had to kill some people. That's not surprising. Yes, the guards at the Salenka Pass. Yes. The bridge where the –

Yes, that's right. The Salenka Pass. Does that make us, you know, sort of wanted? Undesirables number one and two? Yes, yeah, yeah. That's my question. Well, I assume you're carrying the body while you're saying this. Well, look, it wouldn't endear you to the local populace, I suppose, but…

We're not wanted men. No. Well, I've not heard anything about either of you. Who is Ludmilla? Ludmilla, she is the... He puts the legs, like, over his shoulders so that he can do quotation marks. She's the princess of Kutry.

Oh, well, that explains... Okay. Yeah, all right. I believe she's one of Strahd's brides. That's my understanding. Yes. I know this, right? That she's one of Strahd's brides? Yeah, yeah. I I know this, right? That she's one of Strahd's brides.

Yeah, yeah. I just never really encountered her. You've never heard her referred to as princess. Yeah. I don't know exactly the politics of it, but she's been given control of this area of Barovia. Okay, so she knows we're here. Yes.

Yeah, yes. She knows we're here. There was a summon either way. You come to, you've been walking for maybe five, ten minutes. There's just a little divot in the terrain, and you see there's a pile of bodies already there. Just with the others. All of your work?

Well, depends how you define it. You both dumped the body there. Pyrrhon, what is going on? Well, when Esmeralda and I arrived. So Herein, what is going on? Well, when Esmeralda and I arrived... So,

yes, where is Esmeralda? Well, she's been captured. Well, it wouldn't

be easy, would it? And, what happened to Orion? I felt a... She and Orion were

captured. All right, so, we arrive here and I decide that we should try to create some sort of information gathering party and whatnot. And I start doing what I do best within Kuchery.

And Esmeralda becomes increasingly – she spoke with some people in town and they told her that her mentor is indeed in the Amber Temple and he hasn't come out since. So since there's no way to go but the Amber Temple, she knows that that is the end of the line, but the Amber Temple is verboten. It's off limits. People aren't allowed to go there. So she tried to force her way in by riding Orion

straight up the mountain. Both of them were captured and they were taken to the abattoir, which I don't know exactly what goes on in the abattoir, but it's not great. I know that much. Well, it's concerning that you felt your connection

to Orion and Sever if they were captured together. I know she does. She's a bit of an experimenter. Yes, there was... I know the sort. I've worked for more people than I've fought of that sort. Okay.

Yes. Okay. And in further complicated news, I believe she is also. I love this. Grab like the tarot decks out. One of the generals. What's the name? The engineer.

Okay. Okay. Well, I mean, it could be her. What's the name? The engineer. Okay, okay. Well, I mean, it could be her. There's another one. But, well, I heard... So I've been doing a bit of information gathering. I know a bit about Kuturi now. Are we heading towards his location where we're going to be warm?

Oh, yeah. He's probably started leading you away from the corpse pile. Very nearby, there's a little hut just in the middle of the woods. It looks like some sort of trapper's cabin. You go into the trapper's cabin, and you can see this is possibly one of several centers of operations that Piran's been using. You can see on the table, for example, there's a map of Kuchari, which if you want. Ooh. Here it is.

So you can see a few labels on it. So Kuchari is a walled city. You can see that there are four towers. Each of the towers would probably have some vague information about how many gods could be seen at any one time in any of the towers. Maybe some information on people who are in charge of those areas. And then you can also see labels such as, this one would say, there's one pin put just out of town near a stream called Pavel's House. Okay. You can see another one that says a path, the path going north says to the Amber Temple.

You can see another one says the Fine End. That's cool. Another one, the Burgermaster's House, the Sheriff's House, Supply Store, and then the abattoir with a lot of information pinned to that one. Oh, and there's one more called Vagabond, which would literally have written underneath it, where adventurers go to die. Oh, no. Interesting. You see that map laid out

on the table, as well as probably some profiles of some people around the city. Nothing that you would immediately be able to glean. You'd have to go through. Once again, like with Ludmilla's notes, it's dense. You'd have to probably dedicate some time to it. Yep.

Well, right. So I get the three tarot cards out, an engineer, a disgraced knight, and a jester. I give the descriptions that Madame Eva gave me, although they saw, because I think the engineer was like a bald man working at a workbench, which isn't quite Ludmilla.

Yeah. I think that's what's on the card, but the card is never 100%. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're going to see what the thing is, yeah. Well, the engineer, he picks up that card and shows it to you. This card could mean one of two people, I suppose. I mean, Ludmilla would fit the description, I would say.

But there's apparently a gnome, not a gnome, sorry, a halfling. There's apparently a halfling who came to town not too long ago that Ludmilla has snapped up as a… I feel like that would make more sense for not to be Ludmilla. Yes, he is being kept in the abattoir, which would probably mark him as a prisoner of sorts. Okay, that's better news than having to work with Ludmilla, to be honest. Since contracting his employ, she's begun deploying some new creature.

Piran shows you a sketch of the creature that you encountered in the tower. Oh, yes, we have seen that one. Yeah, we saw this. It attacked us,

but it didn't, I've been mulling it over, it didn't try to kill us. It seemed like when it came to the point where it could, it balked and left. I brought him down and then ran off. Well, I wouldn't know about that. I've not seen them show mercy in the past. Then?

There's more than one. Yes. She's creating, well, information doesn't come in and out of the abattoir very easily. But from what I've been able to discern I think she's creating a lot of them. Could you get me one? A body? I could try. Anything coming in or out of the abattoir

is a big ask. I guess yes. This is the gesture. King and queen. You give him the description? Yeah. he starts laughing I know exactly who that bitch is

oh my god uh there's a woman in town by the name of Iona Mirthsong that name Pip

is very familiar to you she's one of the generals who just showed up yeah yeah yeah Iona what was that Iona Mirthsong she's a

troublemaker in town. Really the sort of person who just won't shut up. She's got a quick mouth, which is both what gets her in trouble, but what also often gets her out of trouble. She's very critical of the princess, the burgomaster, and the sheriff, which is a dangerous thing to do. It's the only thing they all agree on, that the sheriff, which is a dangerous thing to do. It's the only thing they all agree on, that they don't like her.

How is she? She's doing well, as far as I'm aware. Okay. Know her? The townsfolk love her. Yeah, an old acquaintance, I suppose. Last time I saw her, well, it was a very long time ago. Is this going to be another problem? I don't know.

I suspect I disliked her more than she disliked me, so that's something. That is something. That was before, though, so perhaps things have changed. She, every, I would say, maybe every week, she runs her mouth about one of the three power brokers within Kutry, and they send people to kill her and then a bunch of the townsfolk all rally together. It's the only time I've

ever seen them stand up to any of the power brokers. Don't mistake it though it's not a full-blown uprising of any sort. They just don't like to see her hurt. She's beloved by the townsfolk. Okay and then a disgraced knight. He sticks a finger on the map to the pin that says Vagabond,

where adventurers go to die. I don't know what it is about Coochery, but adventurers who come to Barovia and give up come to this flock to this place like flies on custard. That's where all of them live and their descendants live. This disgraced knight knight if it is a true knight very possibly lives in vagabond okay but it could be fucking anyone from vagabond or it could be i mean like that who knows what that else that could mean moving around in kutri are we to be

are we likely to be observed are we no safe is moving just you know as though we were another adventure come to die probably the only town in all of brovia where you won't stand out there's uh as as i said adventurers or surrendered adventurers flock to this place so the two of you you will not be the only aesimar and Dragonborn in town. Oh, wow. I've only ever met three of my kind. You might not even need to pretend to be locals. You could just pretend to have given up. No one would think anything of it.

I mean, small blessings, I suppose. This won't be too hard for us, eh? You've had practice. So, have you told Pyrrhon everything that... Son of a bitch. Have you told Pyrrhon everything that happened to the two of you? You fill him in? Well, not yet, but I was waiting to hear more from Pyrrhon.

And then, yes, I think we'll fill Pyrrhon in on all the large strokes of go-gash. Sorry to hear it, he says, with the voice of someone who doesn't care. Yes, of course. But yes, now he's a vampire. That's going to be a... sorry to hear it he says with the voice of someone who doesn't care of course but yes now he's a vampire that's going to be a sorry to hear that he says

that one sounds genuine yeah fair enough hmm um yes that the valakai the burgermaster

we're not allowed in there dusk elves I had wondered why healing took longer. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. We had noticed that here as well. Okay.

It's everywhere. Good to hear. Boris is dead. Cool. Well, that's good, I suppose. This is Tarpos, by the way. Yeah, introduce Tarpos. Tarpos has just awkwardly been standing.

Another one of the lost souls that collect to you like barnacles. A druid, yes. Sure. We've defeated the goat as well. The big one. What? Salazar? What?

Sanzal? Sanzal? Piran shakes his head you must have missed him no we didn't meet a goat on the way up it was a very big goat I'm sure it was well anyway

so as I said three power brokers I don't know if he knows about Woken either oh you tell him about Woken I don't but I assume that Hector does Woken talk him about oh Iector does. We have Woken. Talk him about... Oh, I've heard a bit about Woken. Iona mentioned him once or twice in between trying to kill me.

Trying to kill you, you say? She's not particularly pleased with my methods. She hates everyone. She's very annoying. She likes picking fights. Got it. Okay. Oh, also, another She likes picking fights. Got it. Okay. Oh, also, another reason, yes, the Amber Temple.

So try to explain the cult in a way without mentioning names of things. Oh, Father Lemmick? Yeah, don't mention that name. Okay. All right. No, I think I'm – oh, actually. Yes, I'm familiar with – I won't say his name. actually yes I'm familiar with I won't say his name yes

I'm familiar the king of Goldcrest tried to speak to him and the king of tongues at various points oh can I not say king of tongues no king of tongues

is fine alright good I think oh my god but yes Goldcrest king of tongues is fine

yeah yeah yeah yeah I just don't get scolded by Yendo king Goldcrest contracted well literally used to speak to the king of tongues every other freaking day yeah yeah yeah yeah I just don't get scolded by Yen though King Goldcrest is contracted well literally used to speak to

the King of Tongues every other freaking day well yes they're trying to use that to talk to whatever's in

adjusted to the way the direction of the Amber Temple is to whatever is in to wake up whatever's in that to then free

that sure well I yes I um happen to have a method for you to get into the amber temple you're not going to like it though so there is some sort of ancient evil yada yada thing that guards the entrance to the temple um instead of executing like normal people, they just force prisoners to go up and get killed by the thing.

So if you were to be convicted of a crime, they would just send you up to the temple. Okay. Right. I imagine they would send us up to the temple sans any kind of equipment. I mean, well, what I could do is I could take your equipment and just smuggle it into a location. They could pick it up on the way. Although a lot of equipment they don't. I mean, they would only take equipment if they thought you would resist them forcing you up there.

Why did they not do that to Esmeralda? I don't know. So if we get captured, we could end up in the appetite. You're not interestingly. When I say I don't know, sorry, it's something to do with Orion I believe that's concerning she's only interested in magical shit she won't be interested in the two of you

what I mean you probably don't know the answer to this but within the Amber Temple I know nothing about it it's in interior, interior no there's no information in town about that in this um not that i can find at least ancient evil what is any nothing about that people don't like to say i think it's some sort of ghost uh hang onumably not just a typical ghost, I have to imagine. Well, my understanding is it is something incorporeal, but I don't know if ghost is necessarily the correct term.

Does it possess people? I mean, do you know that? Not to my knowledge, no. Okay. Well, there's something to do. Some fact gathering on, I suppose. Yeah. I am aware of the following things. As you get closer and closer to the entrance to the Amber Temple, there's a fog that

perpetually clings to the area, and I don't know if this is normal for a mountain, but around where the fog is, it's pretty much always freezing. It never gets warm. Sorry, it never goes above freezing. So as a warning, apparently the people who last the longest

have some method of de-thawing their water. That will be a concern if you go up there. I'll have to do some research, but I'm sure if it's listed in a manual, I can find it. I think going to the Amber Temple is probably the thing we should do last. Oh, absolutely. Yeah, I couldn't agree more.

We need to be absolutely prepared and ready for the Amber Temple. That's not something we can do half-cocked. So we're in his little shack or something So where, where, so where in the, like, he's like a little shack or something like that or a... Yeah, you're in a little

trapper's cabin. Okay, excellent. This is one of several safe houses I have around Kuchery. Oh, and sorry,

so there's, you've, I guess, already met Ludmilla, but there is also then the Sheriff and the Burgermaster. So the Sheriff,

the Burgermaster, sorryaster is Elena Tomac. She's, by all accounts, a very strict and cruel woman. She manages most of the day-to-day operations around Kuchery. She doesn't get much involved in law enforcement as far as i'm actually aware even though there is a the sheriff she mostly manages the guards and she is seen as kind of also like a religious leader okay she leads worship of a creature flayed god yes or the headless dragon it has a few names okay but a bunch of the converts a bunch of fanatics her and a bunch of those fanatics go into the abattoir every weekend to pray to their god who lives in the basement don't ask me i've

never been and the people i've sent in never come back okay it's rather hoping it was uh not a physical thing i all i know is I don't know yeah yeah so the abattoir has an upstairs area a the main abattoir floor and then a downstairs area

the downstairs is presumably where they go to worship this god and the upstairs is where if you so there was we found out that there was a

I guess the order of dragon knights I think they probably were here before yes something to do with Argenvost. A few of the older adventurers sometimes mention it. I guess they would have worshipped an actual dragon?

Would who have? The dragon knights. Yes, there was an actual dragon, to my knowledge, called Argenvost. The knights come from a castle somewhere down in the valley called Argenvost Holt. We've seen the spies of that a couple of times. Some of the older buildings in town have a regular dragon motif, not the skinless, headless type. I'm just throwing something at the wall.

If there was an actual dragon here that they were worshipping, that all was their leader of their order, can dragons take the form of humanoids? Is that something a dragon can do? I wouldn't know. Go back to school with Rogers and get Canada's fastest and most reliable internet. Perfect for streaming lectures all day or binging TV shows all night. Save up to $20 per month on Rogers Internet.

Visit Rogers.com for details. We got you. Rogers. Do I know? Yes, dragons can regularly transform into humans. In fact, silver dragons are almost famous for doing it. Yes, it happens all the time. Silver dragons especially, you know, of the dragon types dragon took the form of a knight, perhaps he was a leader, and if they've cut off his head and perhaps corrupted him

in some way, they might be worshipping that, so they might be an actual, hairless, undead dragon. I mean, lucky it's undead in a way. Additionally, and finally I suppose, there is also the sheriff.

Sheriff Victor Stoica. Right. Stoica works pretty directly with Ludmilla, kind of like a second in command. And he tends to any of the weird creatures she comes up with, he tends to work with them. As far as I'm aware, while the sheriff works in subordinates to Ludmilla, none of these three people are friends. Okay, and no one is higher

in terms of their powers? Or is it Ludmilla is at the top of the power? In theory, Ludmilla and the Burj Master should be of roughly equal rank, but the sheriff has been elevated to a higher rank because the sheriff doesn't like the bergum all three of them are enemies and all three of them have a roughly

equal amount of power the sheriff uh has been entrusted with a lot of power by ludmilla but ludmilla does not directly control him right so breaking into the abattoir if that is indeed where esmeralda is currently being kept an immensely difficult prospect i imagine i have never done it myself i've only ever sent other people to do it and none of them have ever returned several of these people were somewhat trustworthy either past thieves themselves or people who very much know the area. The workers' floor during the daytime is not hard to get to because most people in town work in the abattoir. Those who don't work in the abattoir either work growing cows and pigs that get slaughtered in the abattoir. Company town.

Pretty much, yes. So he points to the fine end. It's a – oh, the fine end and, sorry, the supply store. There's two pins. So these two places are run by the burgomaster very directly. You spend – yes, you spend store credits right to purchase things very typically the amount of credits you get paid a day do not correspond to how much you would need to live in a day so a lot of people here are in pretty crippling debt okay it makes sense i'm just trying

to figure out the best sequence of events or the best sort of plan of attack going into Kutri. Do we try to find Iona and your disgraced knight and then go for the abattoir to try and get Esmeralda out of there? Or do we get Esmeralda out of there now, as soon as we can at least, knowing that presumably time is of the essence? Esmeralda was captured a little while ago. If she's dead, she's dead. Well, good point I don't want to be that pessimistic but if

she was killed on capture then weeks yes and if she's still alive then she's probably got at least a couple more weeks in her look what Ludmilla did to the werewolf I would very much recommend that we collect, gather some strength before we engage.

Now, Iona, I'm just letting you know, as I stated previously, Iona, I can let bygones be bygones. I don't mind. Iona is not going to want to work with me especially since pavel should do i need to ask so obviously the sheriff the burgomaster and ludmilla have all been trying to they understand well they know the edges vaguely of that of my organization that i've set up here in kuturi they don't know the true extent of it and they were getting uncomfortably close to working it out. Pavel was a fellow who worked with me sometimes, acknowledging that sometimes a dirty thing needs to be done

for an ultimately good cause. Pavel didn't realize, but I'm sure he would have agreed eventually but he didn't realize that i was setting him up to look like the leader of this little organization he got captured they thought he was the leader and um he was it was it's the only public execution i've seen it was done quite slowly as a demonstration to people but pavel's death has been very good for this organization i've gotten a lot of information out of it people they've lowered their guard ion Iona, however, because Pavel had a wife and children, hands

on head of just like, Yeah, I probably shouldn't have asked. Iona is very upset. Would you at least give any compensation to the wife and kid? What money? Most people here are in heavy debt.

You think I'm running at a... You think this little organization's in the black? Mostly run on favors. Either way. She won't work with you. That is fine. We don't need to tell her

that you're working with us just yet. We'll find out eventually. Eventually, yes, but hopefully we long gone from here. No, but I... What are you talking about? He'll always be part of your organization. Yes, and she will not work for you, join you in your fight. Well, we don't know that 100%.

She won't listen to me. She might listen to the two of you. Who knows? I don't know if she'll listen to me she might listen to the two of you who knows i don't know if she'll listen to me but okay what did you do i mean apart from the obvious i think it's only the obvious really obvious nothing else as far as i can recall i've never heard her mention you but she hasn't mentioned the events of a year ago much and she doesn't talk to me much either to be honest honest. It's mostly trying to kill me. Start rubbing my snout again.

I'll do the same. I'm hoping that the common enemy of Strahd will help us come together. Anyway, so, coming in and out of this little forested area during the daytime is quite suspicious.

People will notice it. So before day rises, we should go to Pavel's house. His wife and children are there. They don't know the full scope of everything. And then they know you, though. They know me, yes. And they think you are? They know that I am in charge of the…

They don't blame you for what happened to their husband and father. They, I might… Do you want to know? What did, are you, what have you… I might have told them that it was Pavel's idea. Okay. Look, I honestly thought you have somehow... They think I'm Patrick.

To be honest, I thought that was maybe where it was going. No, Iona would not have abided that. The only reason she hasn't told them what really happened is because she's grappling with whether or not it hurts them more. I, obviously, people listening, didn't see what I just did. Adam just plucked an errant thread from his T-shirt and idly flicked it away. Not really. Perhaps, as Pierron is saying that,

he, yeah, pulls at, there's a little thread that has come off his shirt. He pulls it off and then flutters it away, as he's saying that, almost as if you were just having a conversation about the weather. Okay. Just, yes, ultimately it is all to take down Strahd and get out of here. Revolution makes strange bedfellows.

Is there anything else you'd like to know specifically about the town? Since I do have a lot of information. Should you want an uprising, I've kind of got the groundwork of an uprising. That is something to have in our back pocket for sure. I guess the vagabond. How many retired adventurers are there? Population of around, he starts consulting his notes,

population of around just shy of 200. Say I was looking for a disgraced knight that's a sort of needle in a haystack sort of thing. Sorry, 200 people who were not born in Barovia. Vagabond has a lot greater population, closer to 500 of children of children and whatnot. Right. If the disgraced knight could potentially even be among them. But yes, obviously, the less than 2,000, sorry, less than 200 is where we should perhaps start,

but it's a lot of people. I could put out some feelers and see if anyone is a Disgraced Knight. I don't have an exact breakdown, but I could have one by end of business tomorrow. That'd be great. Thank you, Perrin. I think it's probably best if you seek out Iona, I say to you,

Hector. Yes. Perrin says, I will not. You don't want me to talk to her. I do not want to. I can start looking for the disgraced knight, I suppose. Yes, I mean, if... The engineer, I mean, that feels like it's a whole separate kettle of fish, but...

That'll be in the abattoir. Those two at least are in town. And that's a good beginning, if anything. Yes, you go be the adventurer who's given up, and I will go down and have a chat with Hyona. All right, that sounds good. And if we can find somewhere for... I just should have gone up and lush and for them to rest. They can stay here.

Okay. Well, that's probably not. Yeah, that's good. They just need time. And Tapos, did you – you don't care for cities, right? Tapos shakes her head slowly. No. Prefer not to be in city.

Kuchuri will – P... Piran finishes for her. She looks like a druid. They're not welcome here. Right. Well, you could either stay here looking after Gorob and Lushen or... Her eyes go wide. Head back down the mountain.

If you're willing to do that by yourself. Could go down mountain. Might to finish ritual, might want help, actually. I will stay. Look after Goroblos. Sorry. Thank you, my lady. He's conscious.

He's right there. He's right there. I was like, oh, you're a stronger person than I. My lord. Oh, well, right. Of course I, first barbarian, need little looking after, but this weakling Lushen, Lushen fills, Lushen fills Gorub's mouth with cone of cold

and then says No, no, no He, look at him Without any magical aptitude How could he possibly heal as quickly as I, Lushen? That could not have been good for your lungs Have you missed this, Piran? Piran looks over and says

I was I specifically chose this location Because it cannot be I checked Heard from anywhere when you scream. Yeah, that's, oh, yeah, well, okay. That's good to hear. Relax. It was for Gorob and Lashen.

It's good. I've actually not even tortured anyone in here. That is. You keep going. I've not, I've barely had to torture anyone at all. Yep, there it is again. Okay, let's... As much as it sucked, back in Goldcrest, I got a lot less lip for this sort of shit.

Got paid better, too. Perrin takes a sip from what is definitely a wineskin. Perrin been drinking. He's been on his own for so fucking long. Yeah, that's fair. That's fair. All right. Yes, really, so if there's, I guess,

just keep them rationed and whatnot. Let's just head to Pavel's, I say. Let's just go to sleep. Certainly. All right, you head off to Pavel's. It's not a very long walk. It takes about an hour. So you've got to do a little bit of a lap around the city.

Okay. You pass by quite a lot of farmsteads. You can see cattle and pigs for the most part. Would be maybe some chickens, but definitely mostly cattle and pigs. Speaking of chickens, I might leave Pop at the shack. Unless Pop comes with me, but of their own volition. Pop's happy to be left at the shack. Tarpos picks Pop up

and strokes him, and Pop That's truly the most incredible thing I've seen. Has that ever happened before? No, not once has that happened. Tarpos looks at you and says, I like Anamore? No, not once has that happened. Tapos looks at you and says, I like animals. Right, not me.

No, you hate, I know. Yeah, oh yeah. I think that animal hates, and I just point to Pip. Yes? No. No? Would have killed. It pecks the shit out of me. Is it chicken?

Chicken. No. I want to give Topos this look. She gives it right back to you. Cockatrice. I then give a further look like this. I've eaten so many of its eggs. Shouldn't have.

I clutch my stomach. I like clutch my stomach. I also clutch my... Ivy shouldn't stick her over... Would have turned to stone if hated. I thought... I thought...

What? I like maybe steady myself against the cabin or whatever. I imagine we're on the front steps or whatever.

What is it, Cockatrice? It's like a... Sort of like... We're like an evil chicken, I guess, in a lot of ways but far bigger far grander what do you mean turn to stone first of course the cockatrice turn to stone and eating its egg you've get you i ate the eggs yes well apparently i mean i didn't know this about the cockatrice but apparently if it's you top was you saying that if we are to

if it did not like us one once we ate the eggs, they would have turned to stone or we would have. No, cockatrice. With a gaze, when it looks at you, it can turn you into stone. turn to stone.

Yeah. If it did not like, would have turned you to stone. And what will be the negative effects of all the eggs I've eaten? Probably not good for you. Does that mean

it actually kind of like Boris? In the leaner months, I ate so many eggs. Did you ever come across a wolf turned to stone? No, never. I've never come across anything turned to stone. Does it know it can turn to stone? She shrugs. Is pop friendly?

It's still young, maybe. She shrugs. I don't not know how to age cockatrice. I thought you were expert. Had one for pet. I like just like give a long... No, maybe does hate them. Give a long stare at Pop's

beady eyes. Pop's still very relaxed in Top Boss's arms. What the fuck, Pop? You need to be nicer to your chicken i need to i need to go for a walk uh yes speaking of let's head to pavel's all right i'll do the whole thing in silence as i said like put a heck of hand on your shoulder like it's gonna be okay buddy how did i not know i mean it looks like a chicken yeah i'm more shocked that it likes me

well yeah it's still growing it's still growing yeah maybe one day i'll just turn to stone maybe i'll turn to pick it up and just become a statue of pip but that'll be the end of pip anyway as stated previously there's a lot of farmsteads be the end of Pipmantle. Anyway, as stated previously, there's a lot of farmsteads around the edges of Coochery. They are mostly either pigs or cattle, but you do see a few chickens. Maybe you don't

like to look at that. I don't like thinking about chickens right now. You eventually get to Pavel's place. It's a, as depicted on the map, it's a cottage next to the river. You can see some quite obvious fishing sort of equipment. It looks like Pavel

must have once been a fisherman. Yeah, okay. Sure, sure. Pierron walks up to the door and does, you can tell it's some sort of signal. Secret knock. Yes, some sort of secret knock. And then you hear a latching, an unlatching I should say, on the door, and it opens up just enough for a timid-looking eye to stare through.

Is that you, Pyrrhon? Yes, I've got some friends. We need to stay the night. Okay. One moment. She closes the door, you hear some rummaging around inside the house, and then you hear some more unlatching, and the door opens. Follow Pierron in. Mathilde is...

Oh, sorry. Well, Pierron, actually, as he steps in, Pierron introduces you. This is Mathilde. Her husband worked with me. Lovely to meet you, Mathilde. I'm Pip. I say Hector.

Matilda is a very timid sort of looking woman. She's dressed very plainly, just a simple green gown with some heavy furs to keep her warm. She has her blonde hair done up in, what do you call it, that sort of braid where you go around the head. Oh, I know the kind, yeah. I don't know the name of it. Very, like, that sort of, what era is that? Elizabethan, maybe? Before then? Maybe.

I was kind of thinking, like, medieval. Oh, like, noughties or fifties. I guess also medieval. I think it is a very old hairstyle. But yeah, she has her hair in a braid, wrapped around her in a single cord, and very striking, piercing blue eyes but anytime that you look directly at her she looks away like she's kind of like she like she's being deferential yeah

sure the house pavel and matilda's house is a maybe three bedroom affair it's hard to tell exactly because there's a lot of shit just kind of hung ramshackle around the place. You can see lots and lots of very, it looks almost like something out of an old Disney movie. Oh, okay. Like a Snow White or something like that. It's just shelves and shelves and shelves

and furniture all around the place made out of carved wood. You spot at least three doors leading to other rooms, but there could be more hidden in around the place made out of carved wood. You spot at least three doors leading to other rooms, but they could be more hidden in and around the furniture. There is a fireplace, which is burning merrily, and it casts a heavy warmth across the room, which as soon as you step through the threshold, you feel it like a wave washing over you.

Oh, that'd be lovely. Oh, that's nice. Mathilde closes the washing over you. Oh, that'd be lovely. Oh, that's nice. Mathilde closes the door behind you. It is a pleasure to meet you. You work with Pyrrhon as well? Yes. Yeah. Yes.

Pleasure to meet you too. Are you here to help? Pyrrhon puts a hand on Mathilde's shoulder. I don't think we should be talking business right now. Mathilde nods slowly. Right, right. Are you hungry? Would you like to eat?

If you can spare the food, I would love some. All right. You all sit down around the table. Mathilde, there was already in the fireplace, you could see there was a pot, a cauldron of stew burning away. Well, not burning away. Sorry, cooking away. Mathilde pours some. Oh, thanks, away, sorry, cooking away. Matilde pours some

Oh, thanks, Matilde. Dog shit stew. Matilde with a, I mean everything in this house is wooden. Matilde with a wooden ladle pours it into wooden bowls, which she serves you with some wooden spoons. As she's doing this, one of the doors

opens slightly and you see a teenager stick his head out, stick his head in between the doorway. Mathilde rushes over to him and then scurries him back into the room. She closes the door. Sorry, sorry, I do not wish for the children to see this. I get it. Yes, of course. It is safer for them to know nothing.

Yes, of course. Thank you for your hospitality. safer for them to know nothing. Yes, of course. Thank you for your hospitality. She sits down at the table with you and all four of you eat in silence unless anyone else is speaking. I don't think I'm speaking.

I think I'm just looking around the house and being like, this is a nice house and a sad situation. I guess I'd all chit-chat, but I don't know if- What kind of small talk can you make? Yeah, what kind of small talk could you make in Barovia?

Nice weather we're having, I guess. Mathilde may be at one point, she would engage in small talk. She's very polite to you when you talk to her. At one point, she looks over. She kind of darts off at pyrrhon like obviously you would never have expected something as open as this from pyrrhon but she when she looks over at pyrrhon it's like it's like she's afraid she's about to get hit or something like that but she looks over at pyrrhon and says i uh spoke with iona in market today Pirin

doesn't say anything immediately, puts down the bowl and says, what did she say? She was talking about she was talking about the sheriff is to perhaps be raising taxes interesting

Pirin says, well that is definitely something we can leverage against him i suppose iona told you to tell me or iona just mentioned matil shrugs and says i do not think she did not mention your name pyrrhon nods slowly but she told you without prompting. Yes. Piran leans back, giving him pause for thought. Awkward slurping. Piran sinks back into silence. I don't know if maybe this seems, if you feel like this seems significant or not, but regardless of whether or not you think it's significant,

Perrin seems to immediately be calculating. This seems to have thrown a lot of plans into action. Interesting. So did you grow up in Kuchuri? Yes. Anyone who lives outside the wall pretty much grew up here. No one else would dare to live outside the wall. It is mostly safe if you know

what you are doing. So I guess the Ludmilla has always been in charge? The princess has been in charge for as long as I have been here, yes. I do not know if there was a time

I do not know if there was a time. I do not know if there was truly a time before her. A princess? Is there a queen? King? No.

She is princess as she is not king or queen. That would be Strahd who is

in charge of this. Yes. Good soup, I say. It is a family recipe. It's delicious. Rabbit, potato, and carrot. That's all you need. Get a lot of rabbits up here?

Occasionally, yes. We trade mostly, we used to trade the fish that we caught for rabbit in town. Right. A lot of wood. Surprisingly, not as much as you would think, she says. She, if you, say for example, if Matilda's talking with Hector and Pip, you say something, she's the exact same reaction as she did with Piryrrhon just moments ago as if she was afraid that you were about to hit her

yeah yeah so she kind of like jolts in your direction but then immediately becomes immediately kind of forces herself to become calm and then responds to what you're saying and yeah when you talk about the wood not as much as you would expect

it is illegal to cut wood without the burgomaster's permission. You wish you had more wood, I think. It would be helpful, yes. Right. The walls of this building do not keep in the cold as

they should anymore. It is getting a little old and the wood for the fireplace must be rationed. Right. Yes, sure. And you used to be a fisher? I fish a little. I fish where I can. It is not my

chosen profession, though I am not as adept as Pavel was. And what is your profession? I tended to the garden and I sold the fish that Pavel bought at Lager or traded there is no

so you're more of a people person I would say something like that yes that's good it really is terrific Stu yeah I can't be overstated It really is terrific, Stu. I can't be overstated.

You should come back sometime. I will make with fish. It is much nicer. It melts from the bone. Oh, my. We'll have to do that at some point. Well, I will make space for you to sleep tonight. Yeah, thank you very much.

It's getting quite late. We had a long track up the mountain. She nods. She stands up and she wanders over to... Has she finished her stew? No. No, no. We finished our stew.

It's fine. Okay, she says. She sits back down finish your stew. It's fine. Okay, she says. She sits back down and starts eating. There's no winning. To be continued... Hey there, fellow adventurer. If you're picking up what we're putting down and want more D&D content, we have just what you need to scratch that itch. D&D is for Nerds+, the symbol, not the word, where you can listen to select campaigns that were once only available to Sandspants Plus members, the further adventures of the Greyhill Free Company if you want shorter campaigns with beautiful guests,

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