D&D is For Nerds - Vampire Infested Barovia III #10 Dissociative Meditation

Episode Date: April 13, 2024

Keep up to date with the Jarren's Outpost Board Game by heading to jarrensoutpost.com or checking out all the links here!Want ad-free and even more bonus content? Just check out Imagination Adventures+ on our website or on Apple Podcasts! Music by the ever wonderful Lepidora, you can check out her music here. And head to peddlerspress.store to peruse our D&D themed merch store and help support the show! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ahem, ahem. You're listening to the Sandspants Network. Alright, here's the score. We're trapped here in Barovia, right? Because even though there ain't a drop of water around, it's like an ocean in here. These bloody mists surrounding us are like walls. And, bloody is right, because our jailer? None other than Strahd Von Zarovich himself.

But, don't go concerning yourself with that just yet because if we don't kill him, things are going to get even more pear-shaped. The door opens and the Burj Master steps back out. I want to burst out of the water trough and then just spear straight in her back. Nothing personal, kid. You are all covered in gore.

I go over to the trough and I have a sippy of water. The guards spot what has happened almost immediately and... Awesome. All right, so we have three rounds. Yeah. Pyrrhon said put on a show. Yes. First round, sip of water.

Second round, sip of water. Third round... I'm radiant solely. Well, that happens. I roll off the roof onto the ground, so I'm more easy to arrest when the time comes. You spot approaching you are four more guards, and in their formation,

Pyrrhon also looks shocked that this is happening, is one of the tall, thin creatures. I guess it couldn't have been that easy, hey? Except we do want to get caught, sir. But we don't want to die. I don't know if we want to get caught by the thin, tall creature. Yes, you're very right on that. Okay. Okay.

Pip, you'll be going first, followed by Hector, followed by it, and then the guards. That's awful. Awful stuff, dude. Okay. So what do we know about It? Hag. Werewolf.

Undead. Undead. That's right. I was going to say werewolf, undead, done. Anything else that we know about that one? I think it's just those three. I think it's just those three. Okay.

All right. Maybe the Frankenstein is the undead. Yes. Is there anything else in there? Don't think so. I don't think so. Not that we know of. Not that we know of.

Okay. Okey dokey. Okay. Okay. Well, Pip, it's your turn. Okay. I'd like to pull out one of my silver arrows, and then I would like to fire at the creature,

and I'd like to make it a precise shot so both of them have advantage. Okay. This is my last magic arrow. Fire once. Critical hit. Oh, yay. Fire twice. Miss.

Ah, balls. Find an opening. You have maximum damage, and you have advantage on attacks against the target for Three rounds Oh that's great So maximum damage for you would be 13 You deal 13 points of damage

I can't remember if it can resist that at all That's why I was going for the silver I was hoping the werewolf part would be weak to it Oh you silvered it? Yeah Oh then it's definitely It was a silver Yeah you definitely are hurting it.

Nice. Hector, it's your turn. You're McFlyingboy. What's your fly speed? 30 feet. 30 feet? You can't get to them this round. How far away would they be?

You can get within 60 feet of them this round. Perfect. I want to fly up and at them, so 60 feet. Uh-huh. He casts Shadow. Whoa! Okay. You can catch two and

the creature in it. Your spell safety is 17. Holy light. I'm burning through my spell. Shouldn't have given you coke. Really shouldn't have. More and more I'm thinking we shouldn't have done that.

The two guards make their saving throws, but the creature does not. So how much damage does shatter? Is it 3d6? That sounds right. Yep. 3d8. 3d8. Right.

That makes more sense. And that's sonic damage, I believe. Or thunder damage? It doesn't matter. They're not resistant to either one of them. All right. That's eight points of damage to the creature and four points of damage to each guard. It doesn't matter. They're not resistant to either one of them. Alright, that's 8 points of damage to the creature and 4 points of damage

to each guard. That's not bad. It's not bad at all. Well, it is the creature's turn. It sprints towards you, my good friend, Hector. And it can get to you this turn. Okay. So, I've got some bad news. Yeah, shoot. What's up, dude?

Yeah, what? What's going on? You are in a lot of fucking trouble. Okay. So I've got some bad news. Yeah, shoot. What's up, dude? Yeah, wow, what's going on? Something the matter? You are in a lot of fucking trouble. Okay. Okay. It makes three attacks. Okay. Your armor class is 16 hits.

Okay, so if I was to cast Shield as a reaction, would I be good? Well, yes. Technically, I'm not supposed to tell you that. Okay, well, I'm just going to cast Shield on the first attack as a reaction. Well, then, first attack, Shield is plus five AC, so first attack, miss.

Second attack, miss. Third attack, hit, even with Shield. Boy. It starts laying into you. You can see it doesn't have a... Not unlike that guard that you killed just recently. It doesn't have a jaw, so its tongue is just lolling out,

slapping from side to side. And as it puts its entire body into these blows, the tongue... That's disgusting. ...slaps from side to side. Okay, this is the one that you probably would have preferred missed. Okay, I mean, it could have been worse.

You could have been hit by the first two attacks as well. Yeah, that's true. Silver linings. You take... Alright, it's not going to be as bad as I thought it was. 15 points of damage. Okay, it's not so bad. Also, your maximum hit points are reduced by that amount

until you take a long rest. You're going to be extremely weak for the Amber Temple, my dude. So your maximum hit points went from 73 down to 60, 58. That's not so Gucci. Okay. Okay. Well, thankfully I'm hyped up on Barovian marching powder, so we're good.

Oh, Barovian marching powder. Get a good boy card. Nice. That was worth a good boy card. What do we got? Thunder and lightning again. We got that twice. And then the gods.

Okay, so two of them are going to un unlumber light crossbows and fire at Pip. Okay. And then, Pip, you get hit once. You take... Oh, they'd be heavy crossbows, not light. That's more vampire-y. Yeah, yeah. Nearly made Dammit spit his drink out.

You take three points of damage. The gods suck ass. Ah, just clips me three points of damage. The guards suck ass. Ah, just clips me. Suck ass. The second one misses. Then the other two guards are gonna attack you.

Oh no, they can only get to you this turn. Okay. So, two guards attack, two guards just reach Hector. Mm-hmm.

Then it is back to the top. Pip, it's your turn. Esme? Oh, shit. Esme, whatever. I don't back to the top. Pip, it's your turn. Esme? Oh, shit. Esme, whatever. I don't know why I rolled. Technically, now she's going lost.

Okay. Oh, with my shadow, could I have done the Radiant Soul extra nine radiant damage to one target? Okay. Well, yeah, I assume you want to deal it to the creature. Oh, yeah. All right. Then, yeah, Esme's turn.

She is going to, God, she only has one AoE spell, and it's not particularly helpful. So, wait. Is it? Buh? It is. It got us. Oh, my God. Yeah, all right.

Esmeralda throws her rapier into the ground, throws her axe into the ground, and then she takes from inside her belt, she takes a pinch of lightning. No, she has a bit of fur and a rod of amber. She rubs them together really furiously, and you see a static charge build up until she fires out of the amber rod a bolt of lightning.

Hector, you're glad you're in the air. It passes right underneath you. It strikes two guards and the creature. They all need to make saving throws. And all of them fail. Nice. They will take 8d6 lightning damage. Okay.

I think the guards are going to die. 8d6? Okay. That just sunk in. 316 lightning damage. Okay. I think the guards are going to die. 8d6? Okay. That just sunk in. 31 points of damage. The two guards are vaporized immediately. Wow, okay. And then it is Pip, your turn.

All right, I'll just fire two bolts. I can't do that again. Well, I can, but I shouldn't. Focus fire on the creature. Oh, everyone's fucking snoring. I'm kidding, She doesn't. That would be an action. I will, like, yeah, fire two crossbow bolts at the creature.

These have advantage as well. Right. First attack. Goo. Come on, Adam. Adam. First attack missed. Second attack hit.

Okay. All right. You putting any spice on these? No. I attack hit. Okay. All right. You putting any spice on these? No. I'm out of spice. Ten points of damage. Okay. Not nothing?

It's not nothing. Because I kind of don't want to kill all the guards because we need someone to arrest us. That's a good point. That is a good point. That was Pip. Your turn, Hector. Your turn.

Okay. So I got the guy in front of me, the itch creature. Then there's two guards another 60 feet away from you. Okay, so I got the guy in front of me, the itch creature. Then there's two guards another 60 feet away from you. Okay, cool. Well, I'm going to just grab my spear and jab it twice into the creature's head, and I'm going to use Heaven and Hell with Burning with the Fury of, I

hope, Radiant Damage. I'm going to turn it on to Radiant Damage. Alright. First attack hits, second attack miss. Damn. Damn. And do that additional nine extras. All right, so all of this is radiant damage? Yeah.

Do you have any other damages to add? I've done the weapon. I've done your halo. Spiced it up. And we'll get to one level of accident. We'll do the last second level of smite. Second level. All right.

Three extra dice. Oh, boy. He's undead. Ah, smart level. All right. Three extra dice. Oh, boy. Well, he's undead. Ah, smart. No, it's not. Fuck. Oh, I didn't know that. It's a construct.

Fuck. Well, you learn that now. I'm thinking he's undead. Well, I was thinking he's a werewolf, so we all got problems. Part undead. I'm like, and he's undead. You deal 22 points of damage. Part werewolf.

Well, you learn now. They're definitely not undead. Okay. You can see there is corpse in this creature, but when you strike at the corpse in the creature, it doesn't burn the way undead should burn. You see

instead of a black bile or ichor or anything like what you're expecting. So maybe actually this literally tricked you. So when you stab or attack these creatures, black bile comes out of them, and you've always been assuming that that's like, because zombies, undead, any type of creature like that,

the blood within them, the life force is corrupted. So it becomes not always like a black icor, but it does. There's some corrupted fluid or something. Especially very, very apparent in the blood of the creature. But when this creature bleeds, this time specifically, maybe some of it splashes back on you, gets in your mouth. You're like, oh, that's oil. Oh, that's not, that's oil.

Oh, no. Just the cogs going too fast and then being like, oh, yes, he's undead. It's made from a zombie. It is made from this. Makes sense. Of course it makes sense. I was like, I was mad.

It does extra damage to the, well, it didn't do it. Huh. On the bright side, you kill it. Oh, thank God. It stops mid-attack. Oh, that's so weird. It's just standing motionless. Just like flapping my wings very confused. To me and Esme, it's stopping like that.

Does that make us take pause as monster hunters? Where we're like, that's something a construct would do. Yes, pretty much. You had already kind of figured that out a bit. But to be like, oh, there it is. Yeah, these are not undead. They are, in fact, constructs. Cool.

Although, yeah, it looks like they're made with part undead or something. It's a whole mix. They're a construct. Yeah, comprised of all these different creatures. Bing! You hear the whistle again and you can see more guards

tracking you from different positions. I'm going to because the objective of this is that you lose. So I'm going to say that there's maybe

a little bit more of a scuffle but you surrender. Well, I was going to. Oh yeah, go on. If you want to do something stupid well I was just going to say

with the with the everything going through and not in my body it was and then the the construct just freezing

I think it would just be the flapping of the wings and then lowering down and then de-summoning the pack weapon and then just sort of like de-angelifying and then just sort of staring at that creature.

Yeah. And just seeing what I could ascertain, if anything, just to look at it and be like, what is this thing? What are we dealing with? How could anyone create something like this? This is like, almost like this is beyond the level of like comprehension or. Yeah, yeah. Almost like, it's not even evil. It's like, it's almost like uncaring yeah like are they infecting people with werewolfism and then they're

getting them like what are we up against hector if you don't know what a blood transfusion is i don't think you're really capable of understanding oh that is unfair i'm in a this is completely this is completely alien to you yeah i guess me and Esme will run up alongside him and then put up a bit of a fight but as more and more guards come And then a few more of these creatures shuffle in as well We'll lay down our arms

Your equipment is taken from you, you are arrested and dragged to At first you're a little afraid that you're going to get dragged to the Gallows No, not to the gallows. Worse, to the fucking abattoir. At first you're a little bit afraid that you're going to get dragged towards the abattoir, but then

it's quite apparent that you're actually being dragged to the sheriff's house. Okay. As you're dragged away, the three of you, Hector, you spot this. Pip, you do not. Looking back over your shoulder, you can see there's a pandemonium now that

kind of, it's like the bubble has burst and now the locals are allowed to react. You hear screaming, wailing, people running around. There's more, the whistle as guards are communicating with each other. People are running around.

Absolute chaos. In that chaos, looking over your shoulder, you see Piran kneel down near the Berger master and collect something from her. Okay. Okay. You just spot that. All right. All right.

Interesting. Intriguing. Intriguing. Ask him about that later, but they probably had something on them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Looting's second nature. You are dragged before the sheriff's house, Sheriff Victor Stryker. He's got a big bushy mustache.

He looks a little bit like a sheriff in the Wild West. Yeah, okay. He's got visibly or an appearance-wise that, but he dresses like a Barovian. He's got that hard widow's peak with his hair combed back. He steps out. He also makes jangling noises as he moves, but unlike the bells

that the Burgermaster had, you can see that it is from a big golden chain that goes from somewhere beneath his large overcoat over-stretch stretching to his pant pockets yeah both sides looks like he's got something tucked in each pant pocket you're not sure exactly what that could be very possibly i think it could be i suppose he also has you can see his on his hands he has many many many rings each of his fingers and thumbs have at least one,

if not several, bejeweled rings on them. Obviously, he's decked himself out as a man of considerable wealth. Yeah, sure. The three of you are dragged before him and one of the guards steps forward and reads your crimes, which would be two murders

and then one assassination, they would specify, obviously. And destruction of property? What property? The creature. The creature? Oh, and you did kill some guards. No, guards, they call that.

Yep. So four murders, one assassination, and sure, yeah, they'll throw property destruction. If they didn't suggest, if they didn't mention it, I would have said, and destruction of property. It's a bit of a like, what was that thing? Yeah, what'll throw property destruction. If they didn't suggest, if they didn't mention it, I would have said, and destruction of property. It's a bit of a like, what was that thing? Yeah, what did we say? What do you have to say to the charges?

This is tricky because obviously we got to thread the needle here because I feel like if we piss him off too much, he might just kill us there and there. Yeah, I almost want to be like, I'd do it again. But we did what we did to try and free Kuchery. We did what we did for the poor adventurers and citizens of this town. Your tyranny will finally reach its end one day. If we have anything to say about it, better kill us.

And if you must shoot me shoot me in my heart better kill us or exile us or whatever you need to do put them in the stockade I will decide what their punishment

will be tonight okay well the sheriff turns back around and goes back into his house the guards drag you the stockade is in the same vicinity as the house. Yeah.

You maybe see a big, you see posters here. You haven't seen them anywhere else around town. You might have seen a couple posters around town. They would say things like, quiet lips, keep coochery safe. Your servitude is our pleasure or stuff like that. Your servitude is our pleasure or stuff like that. The ones here say Sheriff Victor Stryker, law and order for coochery. That's great. You are put into stockades.

You don't feel terribly comfortable when you see that where the head and hands go, the stockade is a bit red around there. I hope that's tomatoes. I do not think that is. Yes, it's tomatoes. You can see that there is a separate gallows and also a place for presumably someone to have their head chopped off

by an axe. They've got all kinds of execution methods here. There is also a line, a string that goes around the sheriff's property of, I believe this type of execution is called exposure. So it's, if you've ever seen those cages that just dangle in the air with people in various states of living and death. Yeah, cool.

So was there anything in it, did Pirin say, that we had to do to ensure that we are exiled? I think what he said was that the crime of killing the Burj Master, the punishment for that would be exile. Okay. He was fairly certain. All right. Fairly certain. I'm getting scared. Why would Burin do

anything bad as Veralda says but he wants to get out of here just as bad as we do you're put into the stockades

yeah and you remain there for some time almost immediately it is uncomfortable the stockades are designed

it feels like they're designed specifically so that a creature of any size would be uncomfortable in them.

Can I not actually break out, but just test it to see how strong this is? If we were to be like, okay, this is... We're about to be hanged. We've got to stop. I would first off let you know that it's not a thick guard presence, but you are always under observation. Although I would not have asked about it. Well, never mind then. I would not have asked about Piran., okay. Well, never mind then. I would not have asked about Piran.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would have just kept my mouth shut. Oh, you could have like a surreptitious conversation. Okay, okay. Yeah. Well, yeah, still like maybe just test, like flex my muscle a little bit just to be like, how strong is this holding us down?

You test it and it doesn't have a lot of give to it. You don't think you'd be able to burst out of it. I think they were expecting bigger enemies than us. Yeah. Well, or this is just designed to make anybody deeply uncomfortable. One of the guards who has no lips. Oh, Gaelic Goliath. She kneels down next to you, Hector. God bother us.

Yes. I hope to bother your God. Oh, I would like to see that. I would love the opportunity. Perhaps the sheriff will cut you into little bits. She produces a very handmade looking dagger and waves it underneath your nose.

Little bits to be consumed by the flayed one. She gestures, they would be all over the place here as well, banners with the flayed god, that rearing headless dragon. Oh, yeah, in the head. I'm like, yep, dragon under the abattoir. Yep, that makes sense. Check, check. Cool, cool, tick.

You would not be the first. Asamar, put in the abattoir hopefully I'll be the last is there enough give to headbutter no absolutely not

no you I mean like even if you could it just wouldn't go well for you I mean yeah you absolutely

at the very least could try, but you're not very confident you'd get anywhere. Do I see that it's getting... I mean, I don't know what my vision is like, but can I see that it's getting to Hector? The way that your position is in a line, so you can't actually really look to the left or right and see each other,

but you are vaguely, because it's happening in your periphery, you're a bit aware of what's happening. Under my breath or through gritted teeth, I'll be like, tolerated, Hector. Listen to the scaly one. She moves from you, Hector, to you, Pip.

What a delicious-looking skin you have. Oh, yeah? I will be the first to taste it. Oh, yeah? I will be the first to taste it. Okay. She grabs your head, turns you a bit to the side, as much as she can, and then licks your cheek.

Sophie, we don't get that much here. Okay. Sweet cheese. She says. She pats you a bit on the cheek. See you soon, sweet cheese. She moves on to Esmeralda.

Esmeralda does try to headbutt her. Oh, nice. Ah, no. Esmeralda. You hear Esmeralda cry out in pain as she very definitely strains her neck. Oh, you could have tried. Oh, good. Good on you, Esme.

Glad one of us did. Neither of you see what happens, but that guard, she just hisses in pleasure. And then Esmeralda screams again, but even louder this time. The screaming goes for maybe 10 seconds and then it stops. You, Pip, because Hector, you're on one end, you can't see at all what's happening with Esmeralda. Pip, you can just see it out of the corner of your eye. You can see that

she's not got the, the hand with the knife is not doing this. The other hand is up against Esmeralda's cheek like she was holding you and she's doing something to Esmeralda's head. Can I be just like kind of trying to look in like almost like thrashing against the the stockade i think you'd literally have to break

it to be able to see yeah you you try but you can't does it last 10 seconds and then stop yeah it stops okay and then esmeralda's like and you can see esmeralda's holding her head down low like she just lost a lot of energy god that guard she climbs back down you can see Esmeralda's holding her head down low, like she just lost a lot of energy. Oh, God. That guard, she climbs back down. You can see she wasn't alone. There were a few other guards there as well. One of the guards, he's missing all of the skin on his fingers,

and you can see those fingerless... Sorry, those skinless fingers are tightening and loosening, tightening and loosening around a leather whip, making a... Like the sound of leather on leather. It looks like he really wants to use the whip on you. I suppose Pyrrhon never quite clarified what would happen before the exile. Now that I think about it. The gods...

So that it would happen. The gods begin loudly speculating on what punishment you'll receive. Punishments, the punishments they're expecting, whether or not they really believe that, you get the impression that they're trying to needle you a bit. Yeah, sure. But they seem a little confident that any of these are possible execution or possible things that could happen to you.

Hung, obviously, which they immediately, a little one on the end, a halfling but it's hard to tell he's got so many parts missing he pipes up no hanging too quick exposure the woman with no lips pipes up again exposure no i think perhaps disembowelment. That always leaves them alive for a day at least. Disembowelment is my favorite. The man with no fingers. No, no, no. You only like disembowelment because it leaves the skin.

Okay, so they don't all eat the skin. Okay, I would like to somehow go into a meditative state. Sure. And maybe try to find penia or a guiding light in these trying times, even though the words of Esme are just echoing quite loudly in my head looking at the corner of my eye being like fuck hector's disassociated yeah hector you withdraw from yourself you feel a disconnection from your physical body like what's happening to your body is happening to someone else you're just observing it your consciousness

drifts slowly above to a point where your consciousness is looking down upon yourself upon pip and upon esme and you are in a third person seeing what's happening while you're in this space you feel a presence manifesting behind you pen Penia? You turn and, well, it's all metaphysical. None of this is, even if it is real, it's not real. You know what I mean. I think I turn, therefore I turn. Yes. You've always turned.

When you turn, you've always turned. The presence behind you is not Penia, but it feels similar. It's Yender. The moment you realize it's Yender, it looks like Yender. Of course, nothing ever dies. Yender, I'm sorry for what happened to you. Hector. Yes. I'm sorry, but our time here is limited. I manifest and like this for you, even in this

space. It's honestly, probably the closest we'll come to conversing and it was a million and one shot. Are you her? Am I who? Are you Yender? Am I Yender? Yeah, of course. It's not another trick.

Unfortunately, you won't know that until it's all said and done. You can either trust me or you can give up. Those are your options. So I guess it is a leap of faith. It's always a leap of faith. Look, let me get into it. Heck, you ain't in the deepest of the darkness, and maybe you know that. Maybe you think you're soon to be in the deepest darkness, but that ain't it either.

Things are going to get real bad from here onwards, for you and for the people you care about. It's going to seem like you ain't got no luck but bad, no acquaintances but enemies. Here, at what looks like the darkest place you'll see people at each other's throats and i know it kills you you can't stand this bickering i get that but heck you just found yourself in this darkness these people were born in it all they know is this and it's kept in the live for long. You can't hold a light down here and say you know the way out. Firstly, because you don't, you just know what you can see and they feel it. They feel it in their bones because every inch of this darkness is mapped out in their minds. They don't trust you

yet because they don't know you. Not like I do. That light you carry is foreign to them and it scares them because it's the light they got to see with this light and they see the place that they've only ever felt. It recoils and they recoil. Some of these people, they're going to be clever and they'll sort it out quick. Those are your friends, even if they're mad at you. Others will take some time and you got to give them that. You push them too hard and they'll snap back at you. And some take some time, and you've got to give them that. You push them too hard,

and they'll snap back at you. And some, some will never see this light. They prefer the darkness because you can't control what you don't know, and they don't know the light. Okay. And that sounds like it sucks, because it does, heck.

It does. But what's really going to suck is that there's knowledge in all three of these groups of people. And like the people who are your friends but who hate you, you've got to find the knowledge that you hate and you've got to use it as well. Heck, before I came to Barovia, I had a vision. I came here not because of a trick or a mistake. I came here because Penia spoke to me.

She said that someone needed my help. And I came here to because of a trick or a mistake. I came here because Penia spoke to me. She said that someone needed my help. And I came here to help that person. And I think that person was you, Hector. And for the longest time, I didn't understand why. She didn't give me anything more than that. But I now reckon I know why. It's because of this moment. This right here.

Because of this one in a million. Heck, I don't know if we'll ever speak again. So I'm begging you. listen to what I'm saying. Is Pena here? I can feel it in you. You're having a little bit of, you're doubting yourself. Look, I'm going to be honest with you, mate. You got reason to.

Shit's messed up and you are not in a good place. You're not going to a good place. Yeah? So maybe Pena ain't here. Maybe she is here. But damn it, you are here. And I couldn't help you in life, but I'll be fucked if I can't help you in death. If I have nothing else, I believe in you.

I got you this much, mate. All right? I'm here. I'm always here. You look behind you, I'll be there. I got your back. I believe in you. You don't know the answer yet, and I don't know the answer yet, but I believe you'll find the answer.

May dawn's light find you in the darkest night. I will see you in the next sunrise. Yender, metaphysically, perhaps she always kisses you on the forehead. As you return, as you drift back down to your body, every part of you feels a little sore, except just a little piece of your forehead.

I'll stop disassociating. Okay, he seems, he's back. All good? In a way, maybe. Okay. What now? We wait, I suppose. See what the punishment is.

You okay? And if the punishment isn't getting, you know, exiled, we think on the fly and blame Piran. You okay, Esme? Esme! Oh, I'm great. I'm grand, she says. Good to hear. After a little while,

you hear the ching, ching, ching of the sheriff returning. It's nearly sunset, not exactly, but getting close to sunset as the sheriff returns. You're on a little bit of a hill. You have noticed as well, in the last maybe 20 minutes, a crowd has begun

forming. The crowd all have they're all locals so no adventurers here all those muted colored clothing there's a bunch of guards as well and some of the and a few a handful of those creatures the people all have their gazes averted but the guards for the most part have kind of smirks or satisfied looks on their faces. And as the sheriff reaches the top of the hill, you hear him. He's consulting with another person. It sounds, it feels a little bit like a,

just from audio only, it feels a little bit like a worm tongue situation where someone's kind of like whispering in his ear. My Lord, let it vote vote let the people vote they would reward you handsomely okay okay all right okay okay very well then perhaps if the position of burgomaster makes itself available. Perhaps then. Perhaps then. And out of the corner of actually no, he's standing close enough or in such a position that both of you

can see, the sheriff looks over at the abattoir and you get the idea that some political, something political is going on behind his eyes but the full extent of it is unknown to you. Yeah, for sure. There wasn't really, no one was really talking,

but the sheriff puts both of his hands up as if to silence the crowd. Whatever noise might have been happening stops immediately. People, people of Kuchari, there has been a great crime, an assassination committed by people not of this place. They are outsiders. The guards begin boo and a bunch of them shove locals who also begin booing. Oh yeah, boo. Boo, boo. They are adventurers.

Boo! Boo! It happens again. It begins with the guards who bully the locals into doing it. It's very hard not to also join in on the boos, but I don't join in on the boos. And most of all, they refuse

to work in the abattoir. You find that a bit funny, Hector, because you did work in the abattoir. I kind of like a little smile spreads across my face. The crowd definitely does not seem to want to boo at this one, but under the watchful gaze of guards, they boo as well. They think themselves better than us. Better than me, your brave and proud sheriff.

The boos continue. What shall their punishment be? Should it be exposure? The sheriff gestures to the cages. There is a bit of a rumble, a murmur in the crowd, started once again by guards, but it's not enough guards.

All of the guards previously had been forcing boos. Now only a couple of them. I'm like, do we need to be doing a bit of helping with this performance? I don't know how. But I don't know if it's like, for example, they think we're better than us. I'm like, yeah, calling up. I do have this. Or is it like, do don't or do is it

do we just have faith in Perrin that he I guess it's just that what I think what Pip is thinking is Pip's like

it's in Perrin's best interests for us to go to the Amber Temple so I I think I've

that is the foundation of my faith in him at this moment perhaps it should be disembowelment I know how some among you like the skin is that one god? yeah!

it pretty much is just that one god and she is very with a lot of gusto trying to get the people around her shout out for her. In another life, she would have been the best Wu girl. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Perhaps, though, banishment to the Amber Temple. At this, I would like to, like, balk, like I don't want it at all.

I would like to put on a performance like that's what I'm the least interested in. Yeah, like eyes wide, like shut up, just like shaking our head. Your performances are drowned out as a bunch of guards, all of whom, none of these guards have any flayed or any missing skin or anything like that. They look like the sort of people who Piran might be able to pay. All of those guards cheer really loudly, and you get the distinct impression

that the locals near them are under, you get the distinct impression that the locals near them are cheering because they think they're going, they are about to die if they do not.

And we're just like, yeah, like, no. Anything but that. Anything but that. One face in the crowd who's also cheering, putting his head up, you, both of you

recognize as Piran with makeup on. Clown makeup. No, makeup to make him look like a different tiefling, I guess. Yeah, just a different tiefling. This one is not as loud as the boos, but it is the loudest out of the punishments.

Okay. The sheriff puts his hands up and this time actually does quieten the crowd. He does actually have to make them be quiet. Okay. Enough, enough, enough! Clearly then you want to see a spectacle this night. Light the path!

The sheriff gestures. You saw this the first day you came to Kuturi. There is a stone path that makes its way, snakes up towards the tip of the mountain. As I said before, Kuturi sits on a large plateau, a K2, if you will, before the actual peak of Mount Gakus. And you see, as if it was magic, lights flare their way up along that stony path.

And now as well, you can see previously, there was no visible defense or anything like that. You can see the torchlights of many guards stepping out, revealing themselves from obviously hidden positions. He, the sheriff, turns to the three of you. Do you have any words before your sentence is committed? Do it again. Chain them up.

Send them to the peak. It's a complicated feeling of relief, but also fear at what we'll find there. You are released. You are, well, you're released from the fucking stocks. You are manacled. All three of you are manacled hand to hand and by manacled i mean there's no fucking yeah yeah your manacles are attached to leg manacles as well that you know like the chain gang yeah yeah for sure you're all very tightly bound the manacles feel very firm they are probably designed for adventurers.

So you could once again try to get out, but you don't think it's going to be an easy task. You also are the... all three of you have one creature either side of you marching you along. They're quite clearly a bit worried

that you might try to escape. Okay. Are they marching either side of us as we leave the town for the stone path? The entire way, at least to the base of the stairs. Okay. Okay. I'm just concerned that I don't know if we need to kill them to get up before we get our stuff back or if they're going to leave us.

I guess I'll just wait and see. Yeah. Again, look, Piran's figuring some of this out. Yeah. And Piran, I guess, you know, he's got us this far. Faith in Pyrrhon. We'll just march, whatever the order is. We'll just keep marching towards the stairs.

You walk single file up the stairs. As you get higher and higher, it gets colder and colder. You hit eventually a point where there may not always be snow, but there is always a howling wind. It becomes a bit perilous now. It's a very, the stairs, you are walking single file, not because you want to or because you're being told to, but out of necessity.

It's not wide enough for two people. And it is, there is no railing and a sheer drop on each side. There are the little stations where the guards can stand, which when you get to them, they seem obvious, but from a distance in either direction, they immediately hide themselves in the natural nooks and crannies

of the mountain. When you get to the base, those creatures form a single line behind you and are marching you up. Each time you pass a guard, they hiss something unpleasant at you. It might be a threat, or it might be just, like, telling you that you're going to your death.

As we're going up, how far up did you get, Esme? Oh, I got just to the base. They stopped me pretty quickly. Ah, yes. I don't think this would have been good for Orion's hooves. Right, yes. Orion. Oh, I forgot their name. Yeah, Orion. I don't think this would have been good for Orion's hooves right yes Orion

I forgot their name yeah Orion really complained thought I was crazy but I pulled rank pulled rank you're not sure they developed some kind of relationship isolated from the rest of us

you think she just didn't understand the nature of your... This is something Esmeralda does all the time. You get the distinct impression she's just not really... If it's not something she's directly interested in, she's just filling in the blank. It doesn't really matter. It wasn't actually a horse. You could communicate.

Never mind. Not good time, not good place. All right. In the darkness, the sun is setting, you could communicate. No, never mind. Not the time, not the place. All right. In the darkness, the sun is setting as you go up. In the darkness, you see constant figures moving around you. It's like there is, instead of the sheer drop, it's like there is space out on either side of you, and the figures are running on that land around you.

You keep seeing these shadows stop, turn, look at you. Sometimes they point accusingly. Sometimes they just run past. Sometimes you feel like they're almost trying to communicate with you, but you never feel like it's anything positive. Do I recognize them as a dark place creature? Yes.

Well, you don't think these are a dark place. You think these are the result of a dark place creature. Like evidence of one. I'd like to voice at some point. Or just imagine that... I don't know if... I think I'm the only one seeing these at this point.

Unless you or Esme mention it, then I'm like... I'm probably trying to keep quiet, to be honest. So, yeah, I don't say much about them. You can see a heavy fog is also clinging to this place. You, maybe only just now, Pip, you're clocking that there's always been a heavy fog clinging to the peak of Mount Gakas. Okay.

Maybe it's like, hey, do you see them too? The shadow creatures? Yes. Yeah, I certainly do. Hmm. A few of the gods that you pass begin mentioning a creature at the top now the creature that presumably is going to carry out your sentence they call it death's many faces oh i hope you've always wanted to meet death's many faces death's many faces grits all who come to

him i'm going to try and wheedle information out of them, but without seeming like I am. Death's many faces? What's that? The souls of a thousand damned came together to make one haunted creature, they say. Is this like what the elves believe in? One body, but all faces. One of them, yeah, just cryptically says one body, but all faces.

Could this be a death god? I don't know. I can't look at a manual, actually. No. So, you know what? I'm looking through a manual here, but I shouldn't be, because I don't have it on me. Its eyes are cold and dead things. Is he describing a death god?

Could this be Aline? I mean, maybe. I don't know. Gods are your department. I'll give you a roll, Pip, because this is actually a pretty significant Dark Places creature. You might have studied it. 19.

Good job. All right. So you know it's a wraith. Now, just to give you an idea of how hard this is, because you would definitely have committed this one to memory. You wouldn't put it in these terms, but a wraith has a challenge rating of 22. Okay. All right. Mentally. What does that mean? I definitely have committed this one to memory. You wouldn't put it in these terms, but a Wraith has a challenge rating of 22. Uh-oh.

Okay. All right. Mentally... What does that mean? Samad asking. It would be a fair fight for four... Well, not for four level 20 characters. It'd be a bit tougher.

It would be a challenging fight for level 20 players. Okay. It'll just eat us like Sunday lunch. Mentally, your brain opens up. An Emmanuel the Monster entry in your brain mentally reveals itself. That entry of Wraith, you did well enough. You can literally just read the entry out loud if you want. Undead, falsely named, soft.

Sometimes known as a Wraith or Wrath. When enough souls are reaped within one place in a short span of time, and if these souls are vile enough, then the hells thyselves mighteth turn them back. In such matters it can occur that the souls collapse within thyselves and create a being of pure negative energies. The wraith is the antithesis of all life, whose destruction it seeks to all measure. It should not be sworn as one single entity, and even all those many whose forms it was collapsed from, once created the wrath, is more a being of negative energies than souls, though several friends of mine, and I have a great many friends too for my 50th birthday party,

was greatly attended, with so many people sending me thy well wishes that this reporter's table buckled under the weight of them have said that in their... That's pretty dis-expression. Just like the memory of watching, I can't even watch you, but like you're looking back at your face and you're like almost mesmerized, you know, you're still going over your head. Face is furrowing about that.

Why do I remember this perfectly? Why would I memorize that bit? Have said that in their seeing of a wraith, they noted that its visage transitioned between a great many of thine soul's faces that it was made of. While it may retain some memories, these are echoes, not real. Thineth soulseth who have been in the creations of the wraith can still be heard from the wraith and at a great distance to for thy savvy hunter

thy shall find thine wrath exists in a place of strength for undeath whether created by thine wraith or thine wraith is created shall here go unknown as this writer chooses not to know such things. Thy landscapes around the wraith shall be thus. Dark and deadly figures haunt thy nights, and a mist clings to thy chilled landscape, sometimes known as a winter terror land. The wraith is capable of slaying with a vitality-draining attack, and any dead it creates shall have their souls bound to the wraith in servitude in perpetuity. Thine wraith is very scary,

as it transitions easily between this realm and thy place, known as the... If you could see Pip's face now, he would be scowling. Scary dimension, a.k.a. the ethereal plane, by some bring scholars who never understood the importance of a good campfire tale Okay. Wraith is deadly at both distances and also at not distances, sometimes known as touching space, with explosive fireballs of gold and attacks that shall shake thy hunter to thy very core.

Fireballs of gold! The bestest way to prevent damages is to make thyself avoidant of necromancy or to secure thyself of fortitude, though these are not guarantees, as certain idiotic, lame, and sexless scholars who refused to turn up to my exciting party learned one day, served them right. The wraith is fearsome and immune to all weapon attacks, poison, acid, fire, cold, necrotic, lightning, thunder, psychic, and all conditions. The wraith is resistant to attacks of radiance and force. Maybe as I remember that, I kind of look back at Hector. Making these the only two methods of normally harming it.

As it is resistant to all but two damages, a savvy hunter would be behooved to fight the wraith with its only known weakness, genuine sacrifice. A mortal willingly giving their life to slay the creature is capable of overcoming the wraith's resistances, though not its immunities. It has also been hypothesized by more learned minds than mine that for there to be a being of pure negative energy, there must be a link to the plane of negative energy. Though where to find and how to plug such a hole has beyond this writer. Manuel, closing in my mind.

Pip is pissed. Hates that I had to memorize that whole thing. Was becoming a monster, but worth it. This goes back out. Last line, perhaps it is a death card or something like that. Maybe. it? Maybe. Pip would rather everyone die than have to

repeat anything of what he just said. I'll explain more when we are no longer in, you know, earshot. You get to what can only be the last guard. And as you pass him, he also makes a snide comment. It was nice knowing you.

But then when you get really close and pass him, he leans in and says, at the end of the stairs, turn left. There will be a chest. Thank you. Tell him to tell her to perform the ritual. He doesn't let you finish. Just go. Do I think it's necessary to get rid of our, the two

creatures with us? I mean, I suppose it is. There's four creatures with you. Fuck. Well, sorry, six. Okay. Well, we're not doing that. Just before the final leg of stairs, there is a bridge. The creatures don't cross the bridge with you. Once you cross the bridge, that last guard pulls a lever

and then the bridge turns to the side so that it is no longer accessible. You are, well, I mean, obviously, Hector, oh, no, you can't fly anymore. Without the ability to fly, you would have to climb down from where you are. Oh, God. And that would look impossible with climbing equipment. But without climbing equipment, you're pretty confident it's just straight up impossible. I should not have had an interesting morning. The wind is blasting at you.

It is Freezingly cold Sort of cold where you're going to start needing to take Checks When they stripped us of everything and our equipment Is that including our warm weather gear? Okay well then we're going to Run to that chest

You sprint to the end To be like well it's so cold Oh I'm so cold We just don't dally and we kind of make a beeline To the chest to the end. Yep. To be like, well, it's so cold. Oh, I'm so cold. Right, well, yeah, we just don't dally and we just kind of make a beeline to the chest. Hopefully there's

some cold weather gear in there. Yeah. Because it's cold. To be continued... Hey there, fellow adventurer. If you're picking up what we're putting down and want more D&D content, we have just what you need to scratch that itch. D&D is for Nerds Plus, the symbol, not the word, where you can listen to select campaigns that were once only available to SansPants Plus members, the further adventures of the Greyhill Free Company if you want shorter campaigns with beautiful guests,

and D&D is for Nerds, not Ognot, where all our non-canon D&D adventures go to rest. Just search for D&D is for Nerds on your favourite podcast app of choice and join us on this epic quest of D&D podcast discovery.