D&D is For Nerds - Vampire Infested Barovia III #16 A Philosophical Debate On Death and Resurrection

Episode Date: May 25, 2024

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At your side. This Friday. You ready? Okay, let's go. The hunt for the wildest movie of the summer. Everybody run! Ends here. This is your super friendly and not aggressive reminder to buy tickets immediately.

Borderlands. Friday. You're listening to the Sans Pants Network. Though you see no water for miles around you, you are, like me, nonetheless maroon. We are castaways in this terrible bad dream somebody decided to name Barovia. To switch up the metaphor, we are imprisoned, and the fog is the bars of our cell, and

our jailer is Baron von Strahd. As far as I can tell, there's no way to escape, other than possibly by dying. Maybe by being eaten by a wolf, let's say. He looks you up and down like he can see what's happened to you. The mistake

has already been made. I'm sorry. Mistake? All deals made within these walls carry a catch. You cannot wiggle out of this, but if you try, everything you have gained will be taken from you. Whatever you want, you will lose

if you break your deal. He bustles out some tea and biscuits for you. Two years ago, perhaps three, I was taught how to attack a lich on sight. Right. I just gesture with a teacup.

Chin, chin. So we have a choice. Or you have a choice? Maybe. I think so. I don't know if it's even any choice to really make. I think it's already been made. Okay. I'm sorry, but yes.

The choice has been made for you. Stride came here and made a deal with an entity called Vampyr. Right, okay. In exchange for power, the power to get... I was going to say what, but perhaps I meant who. He'd gotten what he wanted. What did he want? But he had not gotten who.

There was a war, a terrible battle. I was his court mage. We won the battle, but barely. It was a close thing. It was very close. Who were you fighting? I do not remember. The names have perhaps

been stricken from time itself. Strahd has that power here. So you were fighting. You won barely. And then... Strahd was forced to hide for a time. In that time, the Vistani took him in.

And ever since, he has let them come and go from this realm. But after the campaign, the battle was won, barely. The war took a little longer. Strahd returned and then made a home here. But the home was not enough. He wanted something, someone, but he could not have them. You said the brother's

Petrovna who? he said something about a brother before who? Strahd's brother Strahd's brother? Sergi Sergi?

yes something like that something like that you said did you say something of the stars? the sky? I miss the sky. There's not much to see in Barovia these days. He took it from me.

Often very overcast. You said that we had a choice, Hector. Sorry. Yes. So when Stride came, he made a deal with the NC known as Vampyr. Free Vampyr, get the power. And then, oh, no, I guess it was Barovia. All of this happened.

Yeah. So once every 10,000 years, we can seal things back up. The upstairs, the dial. Right, yes. What it was counting down. The sundial thing. What it was counting down to, I believe, was counting down to when we could seal something up.

Okay. Seal up Vampyr. Strahd's power, gone. Gone. Correct. Barovia free, back to the square one. Yes, Barovia is free. If only he gets his skin back.

Perhaps. No, no. I am a lick now and for all time. Okay. No, my deal was not with Vampyr. I see. Was your knowledge deal? No, no, no.

Perhaps. Yes, it was knowledge of a sort. But there are many knowledges that can be found here, many powers that can be found here. I forget what deal I made, though. But you said a choice. Yeah.

So that's one option. Well, there's two sarcophagus. Right. So we could seal the other thing back up. And what becomes of us? Well, Aline phrased it as in, well, I would then become its jailer. But then when I die, it will be free. So it's really not really a choice at all, is it?

No, that's a terrible deal. How long you got left, you know? Yeah, yeah. Seal Strahd. You said you knew where Van Richten's camp was? Van Richten? Elf. Ah, there was an elf here not long ago.

Where is his camp? Right. I'll take you there. Thank you. No, no, not at all. It's nice to have company from time to time. You lasted longer than many others. Lasted?

Good to hear. Adventurers come here to die. No, I mean, do we not continue to last? The stranger, Exothander, whatever you wish to call him, looks at you, Pip, and there's a brief moment of like the fog clears. Yeah. And he talks directly to you,

Pip, and only to you. Oh, fuck. If you died, no one would know where to look for the fucking stain. And then the fog comes back. Pip, that's exactly the same face I do where you're just like fully

recoiling. Kind of a horror. And then get a real far away look on his face. Yes. The elf. The elf. I'll take you. Thank you. What the hell? He's a lich. What do you expect?

So Aline gave me, taught me the ritual we need to do. I know exactly what we need to do. But in doing so, I need to take her back into the material plane. Okay. That's not so awesome. She is already in the, in the material plane. She says she has plans within plans that will stretch out to millennia. Right. And that when I die, I will hold up the now very mundane-looking mace.

I will possess this weapon, and I will teach the people who wield this, my descendants and their descendants and their descendants, of what to do and the knowledge that we have. And then one day, her avatar will pick me up, and I will be gone. Okay. My soul is already hers, she says.

A deal I never really thought I'd make Well, I mean I would make the best of it that you can There will be no afterlife for you, but you will live many lives I don't know, man, I mean It wasn't really yours to give away, was it? Your soul? You'd already promised it to somebody else Promised it to Penia

Right If you ask me, that's who Aline should take it up with Well, you'd already promised it to somebody else. Promised it to Penia. Right. If you ask me, that's who Aline should take it up with. That is a very good point. I would caution not to mess with the dealings of gods. If you break this pact. It's a bit too late for that. If you break this pact, will you lose the knowledge? Verse, will Vampyr or he become free if we have sealed them?

Yeah. I think that you have been given a curse that you do not want. But in exchange, you have been given a power that you need. I think you are right, says me. It is a terrible burden to know that there will not be eternity awaiting you. But there is a comfort knowing that in exchange, you have saved many lives or given many lives more time. Aileen did say it was a millennia. It is a long, long time.

It's a long, long time. I can be free of this place. We can go. We can get rid of Sir Grace. I can be free of this place. We can go. We can get rid of Sir Grace. I can help Tiffany. Esmeralda looks forward and nodding. She sounds dismissive, but it's not like she's trying to be mean. She's just got other thoughts, save Tiffany.

She, yeah, is just kind of a bit dismissive of it, but it's more like she's returning to whatever train of thought she had before. Avenge Sunsen. Get rid of that inky black. of it but it's more like she's returning to whatever train of thought she had before revenge sunset get rid of that inky black you're led back the way you came and then back onto the original balcony that you started on you go through the other the opposite

set of double doors which you hadn't checked but are unlocked and then you go through corridors like a little twisting little path. You pass a hole that has been just like there's just a hole in the ground. That's no good. You don't want to walk towards it.

No, no, I ain't even thinking about it. But then Exothander brings you to a door, pushes it a little bit just to show you it's unlocked, and gestures towards it saying, beyond is an amphitheater, a lecture hall. His camp is in here, was in here. Thank you. Thanks, stranger. If we get the time, you know, we've got a lot going on, we'll try to bring you your equipment.

My equipment? You're foreseeing the stars in the sky. I remember, the stars. Yes. He took them from me. Stranger wanders away, muttering to himself. I didn't mean that. I don't think we're really bringing him his equipment.

Esmeralda shrugs. If he knew Strahd, a lich is a powerful entity, but if we does big quotes, if we jump him with his equipment, it might jog his memory. We can get some information out of him.

That's true. And then fucking destroy him. At the very least, we should destroy him. Yeah. Any information we can pry from that dead skull is good. Who's first in? Probably Esme. Yeah, I would imagine Esme.

Esme steps in first. She does a bit of a gasp, puts a hand over her chest, and then fuck this place. She spits on the ground and keeps walking. Okay. I'll go in next. Okay. This chamber is brightly lit by red copper

lanthorns, I don't know what that is, so don't ask, that hang from the ceiling,. I don't know what that is, so don't ask. That hang from the ceiling. And I won't Google it. There's a red light. It's good to take a stand, dude. I refuse. Lanthorns? Call them fucking lanterns.

Or say something better. Don't. D&D? Shut up. The walls are sheathed in amber that has been shaped into bas-reliefs of wizards with spellbooks. Stairs to the north and south descend 20 feet to an obsidian lectern, It looks like some sort of lecture room or something like that. Around the podium, you can see the same camp that you saw outside of the Amber Temple, the same camp that you saw outside of the Amber Temple, the same camp

that you saw in the Wizard's Tower. Van Richten really does the same thing every single fucking time. Dude, that's Monster Hunters. Esmeralda, as always, there are some fucking crates here with equipment in them. Esmeralda cracks them open and

starts refilling her supplies. No worries. Aside from that, you do find tucked underneath the lectern Esmeralda cracks them open and starts refilling her supplies no worries aside from that you do find tucked underneath the lectern there is a journal which Esmeralda picks up as she's picking it up a metal amulet falls out of it

and into her hand which she catches basically I do not know what this is clearly he thought it was important. She throws it to... She keeps it. She hates both of you right now. Why me?

You stopped her from killing Pip. Yeah, I did. And then we kind of stopped her from going to the resurrection. Yeah, she also went to the resurrection. She can still go back. I really don't think we should. I don't think...

If she went back now, would you let her? Yeah. Okay. Let her know. No, no. Communication's key, baby. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's what I said. I said, let's go find Van Richten's cave. Yeah, he did. And then, if we still think bringing him back, using whatever it is that is here, then we can go back. Those were my exact words.

Those were his words. Esmeralda starts flipping through the book. She keeps the amulet. She maybe shows it to you. It's got a... It's an amber amulet. So presumably something to do with this place. It's got a...

What do you call it? Hang on. I've got to look it up. It's an animal. It's got an animal head on it dog no it's like a bird

seagull yeah owl seagull pigeon evil seagull sturgeon you know how

there's been a seagull theme yeah it is fucking weird I don't know why jackal oh sorry it's not an animal it is an animal

sorry it's not a bird jackals aren't animals you know they're friends it's got a jack. It is an animal, sorry. It's not a bird. Jackals aren't animals, you know. They're friends. It's got a jackal head on it. Oh, okay. Jackal.

Does it mean anything to me at all? Jackal. No. They're the god of the werewolves, right? Like a hyena in a way. I suppose, yeah. Could be. No, it doesn't look like that.

No, nothing at all. It's a desert creature, which is weird. But not that weird. Is there anything? Esmeralda's just flipping through the book right now. Not much that we do not know already. Oh, I found out where the name Rahadin comes from. Oh, yeah. There's a dusk elf who comes here sometimes.

Van Richten spoke with him. His name is Rahadin he is Esmeralda it almost looks like she's looking at a porno for a second she unfolds the thing didn't we see a Dusk in old his tower

there was like a butler of sorts yes yes Esmeralda turns the thing fold that thing is a sketch

that Van Richten had done they do bear a striking resemblance Van Richten's sketch makes the elf look a little bit older but with elves

it's always fucking hard to tell anyway it's a certainly a dusk elf the same kind of stern expression Rahadin I believe perhaps from It's certainly a dusk elf, the same kind of stern expression. Raha Din, I believe perhaps from Van Richten's study,

he is a strad's butler, assistant. And he would come here. He comes here sometimes. He prays to the statue in the center who he, she keeps flipping through, God of Secrets. That's right. Oh, interesting. He's praying for Strahd's release. Right.

Well, that's, and let's not forget this, the nature of deals. Any good deal, never such thing as a free lunch, even for Strahd. Yeah. Let's keep that in the forefront of our minds. What we need to do is we need the ashes of the vampire's avatar. And we need to bring those ashes here. Esmeralda lets out a snort of a laugh. And in doing that, it'll take... Seal them in the amber.

Right. It takes five minutes. Okay. Ideally, you want to do this with two people, because when we start doing that, well... Not the avatar, but the actual entity will try to fight back. Okay.

So all we need to do is kill Strahd. Step one. That is correct. Kill Strahd. Kill Strahd, who is not just a vampire, an intimidating foe, but kind of the vampire in his realm. Correct. We kill Strahd. Yes.

That's step one. Step one. That's step one. Step one. With Strahd's allies and army on our heels, rush for the Amber Temple. A full Barovia away from Castle Ravenloft. Basically, literally as far from one another as you can be. Now, with vampires, when you kill them, they stay dead, right? Famously, you'd be crazy to hear this, no.

Right, right, right. Because when we killed Esher in Velika, that's the end of him, right? Absolutely not. Yes. So when we do that, then we have to scoop up the ashes. And as the ashes, I assume, are reforming, take them more than a day's travel. How long does it take for a vampire to for strada who knows yeah well uh a vampire killed in its crypt turns to ash naturally this just

happens but that is dead dead for a normal vampire i'm guessing for strad dead dead is not enough and we must make him dead dead dead, dead. We kill Strahd. He goes to his crypt. We stake him in his crypt. He turns to ash. We take the ash, bring it here, then we can kill Strahd. Correct. Whenever the

entity is here, the avatars are not truly dead. There's been many uprisings against Strahd, correct? That's what we've heard before. Yeah. They probably, someone mentioned, who was it? They took him out once before.

He returns. They took him out. They took him out. Was that in Markovia's books? It might have been. I believe so, yes. That sounds like where it might have come from. So they're taking him out,

and then they think it's all done, but I guess there's dead, and there's dead. So it can be done, is what I'm saying. It's not about killing Strahd, it's about trapping Vampyr. Yeah, yes. But Strahd has been killed before.

Not dead, but dead. I know I understand you're saying step one is to kill Strahd, and it seems impossible, but it has been done. Plus, if anybody can do it, it'll be the man awash with destiny who's had something like seven or eight Turok cards come true in the last month. Esmeralda keeps flipping through.

This entire time she's been reading through. There is perhaps a complication. What is this? Step one is not killing Strahd. Go on. Vampyr, he is tainted, or he is this land. Strahd is this land. They are the one and same, perhaps.

Who knows? It is messy. Strahd gains power is this land. They are the one and same, perhaps. Who knows? It is messy. Strahd gains power from this place. There are... She keeps flipping through. She shows you a big map of Barovia. Not the town, all of Barovia. Surrounding countryside and everything.

Oh, I think I know where this is going. You see maps of Barovia laid so that someone could read connections between places. Like someone's trying to decipher a cuneiform, but using trees and mountains and even settlements as the cuneiform. What's cuneiform? It's like pictograms. Okay. An old language.

It's like pictures meant to represent ideas and words. Okay. meant to represent ideas and words. Okay, so it's like you're getting, say, a bunch of different A4 pieces of paper and then layering it over the top and all in different ways so it makes a big map? Yeah, it's like, you know people who, in our real life,

who seem a little, maybe crazy when they're like, oh, if you connect these dots in New York City, it makes a pentagram or something. So it's Charlie Day doing this. Yeah, yeah, if you connect these dots in New York City, it makes a pentagram or something. So it's Charlie Day. It's got big, I mean, for you lot here right now, it doesn't seem so crazy, but for us...

In another context, it would seem deranged. Anyway, yeah, all of these notes have been arranged in such a way, and Esmeralda is piecing them together in this way. You can see that there are texts, scratches from wall art, and a dozen other different writings with attempts at translations next to them. So you see it'll be written in something you can't even identify.

Then it'll be written in Infernal. Then it'll be written in Old Infernal. And then it'll be written in Common or some other language. Esmeralda speaks haltingly at first she says before he uh before right van richten was researching the devil strad uh and the deal he made with one of the entities here, Vampyr. Yes. In exchange for conducting a ritual involving the sacrifice of his brother, Sergi, Strahd was given immense power, both personally and over the lands of Barovia.

She keeps going through the papers. Yeah. The lands, they're now a part of him, just as like a tree or animal. Deep within Strahd is one of three... The translation is unclear. Seeds or perhaps a heart?

It is one of three. Inside him. Right. Like the seed, the golden seed? The heart of sap. Oh, right, yes. The tree of sorrow. Similar to that? Perhaps. The translation right, yes. Yeah, the tree of sorrow. Yeah. Similar to that? Perhaps.

The translation does not mention what happens to the other two, merely that one was planted within Sthrad. Well, one was planted in the tree. Yeah, and the tree went wrong. Where did that one go? There were three? It's such a hurry to get out of Valakai. Where did that one go? Distantly, some random god picks up the seed. We were in such a hurry to get out of Valakai.

Where did that one go? Distantly, some random god picks up the seed. Uh-oh. I'll just shove this into my chest. We just had to get out of Valakai, didn't we? Because we were, uh-oh, I'm sure it's fine. That one would be in Valakai. Well, one made Strahd and the other made the tree blight, so what could it possibly do?

It was down in a city that is now controlled by an internal bubble winter or whatever. It's fine. I think the Wizards of Wyne, do they have another? Best not to think about it. Go on. Hector maybe starts disassociating again.

These connections between Strahd and the land, they run deep. This is much more complicated magic than I am used to deciphering. But it may now be impossible to separate Strahd from these lands.

Esmeralda's fingers continue to scan through some of the documents, searching for meaning. It looks like the connection, it chains him here. It is what, it is his source of power, but it is also a cage,

if you will, for him. Another prison. Vampyr traps Strahd, and by extension, all of us here in Barovia, using this. So he made a deal with Vampyr. Vamp this. So he made a deal with Vampyr to kill his brother after he won some war or something. Something like that. That's what Stranger was hinting at.

And then he made the deal to get rid of his brother for some reason and then chained here. Yeah. These lands, they draw power from the same locations that Strahd does. Perhaps if we are able to destroy these lodestones or fanes, we can weaken him for a final blow. Van Richten, her kind of voice catches again, has approximated their locations. She unfurls the biggest of the maps, which has a full layout of Barovia.

It's a very old map. Yeah. So you can see Kuturi is now marked with a, or in this map, sorry, Kuturi is marked with a dragon, a silver dragon's head. Okay. Which is something that you mark in the back of your brain. Yeah. She consults the map and then points where you are at Mount Gakis. Yeah.

Mount Gakis. Here, there is a fane which grants Strahd vision over these domains. There is little he cannot see while this lodestone is active. It says, oh, Esmeralda stops for a second. Strahd knows when someone says his name he knows where they are and their immediate vicinity I'm imagining this bullshit little affectation

I do the kissing my fingers and putting it to the air that everyone does is doing nothing then it might not do nothing is it marked? this little there's an approximate location. So when you say his name, he knows that people are speaking about him?

He knows. It does not say how much he knows, but he is aware of you, of your location, and a little bit about you, perhaps. So the affectation, this bullshit, as you say, is actually doing a lot. What do you mean? Because they're not saying his name. Oh, that's true.

It's the opposite. It's the opposite, yeah. All right. I, fair enough. I'll eat crow on that one. Yes, so I guess, okay. Yeah. She points to Lake Zarevich, the lake just north of Valakai,

where you fought the watery mass. Here on the bed of the lake, at the deepest part, there is another lodestone. This one makes him impervious to magic. Spells will bounce off him as arrows off dragon skin. That was in the lake? Yeah. At the very bottom of it. We weren't in much of a position to sink that deep,

but yeah, we were right on top of it. This time she points way out to the west near Yesterhill, where, if you recall, is where you saved Tarpos and also where you first encountered the tree blight. Here there is a druid's grove. Perhaps our friend can tell us exactly where the grove is, but at its center is another fane, which

unless it is destroyed gives Strahd near immunity to physical damage. Should any blade slip its way through his enchanted skin, it will turn moments before piercing his heart. You say destroyed. I think our druidic friend did not want

things destroyed. Yeah think our druidic friend did not want things destroyed. Yeah. The writings here are unclear on how exactly to break Strahd's connection, but to destroy these lodestones or fanes would be the easiest way. I know. I was trying to ask if there was a way that we could – because I think there was, she suspected that there was this connection. Yeah, well, yeah, that's the druids' whole deal. They used to worship the land, now the land is Strahd, so they worship Strahd.

Yeah, I was trying to ask Tapos if there was a way we could... Yeah, she seemed fairly reluctant to... Eleniel, perhaps, will know something. Esmeralda points all the way to the east, past the village of Barovia. There's a lot of fields, open fields.

Barovia, the village, is the bread basket if you will, of the rest of the valley. Any food comes from there. Recently been salted, yeah? Yeah, sorry, it was the bread basket. A wave of guilt washing over Pip as he looks at it on the map. There is another fane here in the fields,

which specifically protects Strahd from the weaknesses that come with vampirism. Running water, radiant damage, any other limitation. Even if Strahd loses his imperviousness to physical damage, if we do not also destroy this lodestone, a stake to the heart will not harm him. That is the four lodestones, but there is one more thing to consider.

She points to Castle Ravenloft, the seat of Strahd's power. The texts make reference to an extra protection, one that Strahd constructed for himself. Of course. It is not of the land, but we should keep it in mind.

The walls of Castle Ravenloft hide a literal giant beating heart. While it is alive, any harm done to Strahd is instead transferred to the beating heart. It would be wise to destroy it separately to remove that protection. Okay. Somehow destroy the heart inside Strahd's castle without him realizing it. Yeah. It is kept in. You mentioned like Strahd.

Yes. Sorry. Yeah. I'll just not say like straw. Yes, sorry. I'll just not say his name. Sure. I think we have to at this point. I don't know. I just said like the Amber Temple. I don't know if this is offering any... It's probably a good habit to get into it either way.

Yes. Van Richten's notes mention that it is most likely kept within the clock tower. Clock tower. So we need to find that. So, step one. Find these lodestones, veins, and sever the tie between Stroud and the land.

I just look at you again. Sorry. Esmeralda gives you a look as well. It's like, come on. I mean, I've been saying it the whole time. Nothing has happened, but I'll stop. Now that we know. And quotation marks, nothing has happened,

says the great General Pip Mandarin. Well, so step one is his ties to the land. And then the aforementioned. Well, I know Tarpos, she took Oriban-Lashen to it.

They said like a temple or something. Yes, some holy site. Near Mount Gacchus or the base of Mount Gacchus. Could be the same place, possibly. Potentially. Maybe she's doing something there. Okay. Sands or whatever that might have done

yeah it's very much just like I guess like Hector's training is all like god bullshit nature bullshit so it's just like I don't know if you tame the goat is that good

I'm scared go to bed stop go to bed she happy horse mode I'm scared Go to bed Stop, go to bed She's happy A lot of horse mode Yeah I guess those are the things that Tapos was telling us about Perhaps she's gone to

We know she was kind of already on the way To something similar She left to do something Yeah You assume Because she had spoken about Some ritual to Basically to make Sangzor respect you.

And it would not be that much of a stretch to assume that this ritual is potentially... Similar kind of. It's the cleansing side of the... Yeah, you already know that she knows where the lodestone for Mount Gakus is. Yeah, right. Oh, I mean, maybe Dalapos has already taken care of one for us. You know about destroying the lodestones. Yeah.

You know that Eleniel is pro-destroying the lodestones. Yeah. But Tarpos is not pro-destroying the lodestones. She hasn't taken care of it as far as you're aware. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When I think it was trying to speak to the two of them, there was this, again, trying to get an answer from Tarpos. Like, I guess, bleeding stone.

Yeah. Yeah. Cleansing it or killing it, I don't know what will diminish Strahd's powers. If one will and one won't. If we start cleansing or destroying or whatever these lodestones, presumably Strahd will know, right? Does Van Richten say anything about that?

She flips through, Esme keeps reading. It is difficult to say whether or not Strahd is aware of the lodestones. Certainly, if he does not know the instant it happens, he will quickly deduce when his power begins to wane. When magical effects begin to harm him again, he will know. You understand. And I presume, I guess the idea would be to try to hit them all before we even approach Strahd. Absolutely. Where was the one, one of them you were saying, Esme, stopped Strahd from being able to sort of tell, you know, view the land, right?

There's one that if we destroyed it first would mask our actions with the others. That is the Mount Gakas one. That's the Mount Gakas one. Yes. Okay. with the others. That is the Mount Gacchus one. That's the Mount Gacchus one.

Yes. Okay. This would make us... He would need to rely on the eyes and ears of his creatures instead. That seems like a good one to hit first then. Perhaps. Perhaps Tarpos and... Yeah.

Gorub and Lushen are already there. Meanwhile, in a place of hostility, Tarpos hunches her body against a snowstorm. Gorub and Lushen are already there. Meanwhile, in a place of hostility, Tarpos hunches her body against a snowstorm. Gorub and Lushen in tow behind her cling close, lest the mighty wind bowl them over and away down the side of Mount Gakas. For a brief time, Gorub casts his eyes down the cliff to the wicked stones below,

ones that would break his bones and rend his flesh if he would only fall to meet them. Lushen instead tries to conjure a small flame to keep their shaking hands warm, only to find time and again that something within this place leaves the weave of magic inert, a dead thing to be held and examined, but not used as he is accustomed. While both dwarves try to put their thoughts aside and focus on the journey, Tarpos does the opposite. Her gaze turns inwards to memories from long ago.

Archdruid of the Grove, K'van, is holding her hand. Tarpos's bare feet feel soil. She is six. She can draw a line of essence from the ground into her heart and through her hands into K'van's heart. Slowly, she extends her awareness. K'van nods gently, prodding her onwards. You are doing well, my child. These lands want to talk. They spill their voices forth. All you need do is listen. Tapos is a good listener. Her earliest memories were not her own, but voices of the forest, speaking to her as an infant. She remembers herself through the eyes of the flowers as they guided her to K'van, an orphan in the woods. Tarpos is older now, a teenager, years before Strahd came to this land.

The wolves were friendly then. They speak to her, and she listens to them. The wolf, who would one day be Boris, tells her a joke, and she laughs. Suddenly, the forest is screaming. The wolves scatter, and Tarpos wraps her hands around her ears. She screams from pain. Distantly, she can hear the forest calling out in pain. Instantly, Kavan is by her side. He holds her. Breathe in. Two, three, four. Hold. Two. Three. Four. Out. Two. Three. Four. Kavan repeats.

The child is sensitive, Keshgar mutters. Her mind cannot handle this. Tapos has come of age. Normally, a coming of age ceremony is a time for celebration. But a new presence has come to this land. A dark presence. As archdruid Kavan must decide how to approach a changing land. The trees no longer sing in harmony.

The animals no longer offer friendship. The lands change and so must we. Keshkar gestures angrily at K'van. Strahd's power offers us immortality. The grove would be as an apex predator. In the predator, you see only strength. K'Vaan speaks calmly, though his voice has an edge of warning. And you see strength as only force. This is not how nature speaks. Keshgar's mouth curls with a smirk. I fear there might be something blinding you, old friend. A weakness

you do not wish to cull. Keshkar lets his words trail off as all eyes turn to Tarpos. The attention is too much. The world begins to spin, and Tarpos's vision narrows. The child is sick. She cannot lead our people properly. The voice is somewhat cold, a chill that whips to the bone, a cruelty and indifference that only the emotionless hand of nature can express. Her mind processes. The voice trails off, searching for the right words. It processes. It processes... It can be easily overwhelmed. The weight of Archdruid would simply be too much for the girl. Keshgar feigns sorrow towards K'van.

Tarpos has been an adult for a long time now. She is no longer a girl. Her fists clench in rage. Her vision begins to narrow, but she contains herself. The Rite of change will begin, and a new archdruid of the grove will be chosen. Tarpos's mind returns to the present. They have arrived. A spindly trail flares out from the side of the mountain, like webbing between fingers. At the edge, a rock stands out, different to all around it, a shard of black stone with veins of zircon running through it. Old, older than time, perhaps. If they had the air to gasp,

Gorub and Lushen would have done so. The rock feels powerful in an unexplainable way. To behold this is to know that it is something as gravity. It is just inherent. For the first time in hours, someone speaks. Wait here. Tarpos calls over the galing wind. Gorob and Lushen merely nod, struck silent by this place. Tarpos closes her eyes. At first, the wind is too loud. She feels herself teeter at the edge of emotion, about to be engulfed in a wave so high that she might never breathe again. But Tarpos plants herself firmly

and conjures the line from herself into the rock. She doesn't force the mountain. She lets it come to her. Tarpos lets the mountain speak. And it does. The wind slackens, the chill slinks away. Still with her eyes closed, Tarpos walks the trail, listening the whole time. She does not know if her hands are on the stone physically,

but she feels a connection to the ancient heart of the land, and she knows she is close enough. The heart is burned, filled with the emotions Strahd has streaked with this place with. The emotions are as much part of the land as the trees are, but to be in communion with the land is to take a part of it into you. To gain the trust of Sangsor is to feel pain and sorrow and anger and loneliness of Straad tarpos stands now before the old goat the essence of mount gackus distance is meaningless on the mountain separation is an illusion throughout the mountain tarpos sees everything the jagged shard of the amber temple pyrrhon talking to

bigfoot paul in the tavern the hag combing through the wreckage of her house and calling back her puppet children tarpos opens her eyes. She is standing where she began. Perhaps she never left. Done. Tarpos turns to Gorob and Lushen. They bow in respect. You will be Archdruid, they say in unison.

By our lives, my lady, we swear it. Okay. Well, unfortunately, with Garab and Lushen and Tarpos, we never sort of planned for a place to meet, did we? No. They sort of just disappeared. Well, yeah, they

disappeared. Yeah, they sort of just left. I mean, hopefully they'll come back, but, you know, where do their loyalties lie? Who can say? But at least we have a heading now. We've got a next step. Right. That's plenty.

We've got a next step. So once we leave here, I think we've taken out Ludmilla, whatever the abattoir is, whatever's under there. Collect the guy that you want. The engineer. Yeah. The engineer, Yeah. The engineer, yeah, Votable. Okay, well,

I mean, the less time we spend in here, the better, I say. And then I just want to start looking around for an exit. I mean, I know there's an exit to this room, but I'm going to make it clear that, alright, let's get up and leave. We've done everything we can. Was there anything else that we needed here?

As May searches around in Van Richten's equipment, it is hard to say. He is not one to hide things much, but, I mean, maybe, I don't know. My question is, there was a bridge that we had to walk across. Right. So I guess if we... How far was the bridge

in terms of distance? The bridge? It was about 50 feet. Is there any ropes or anything like that in the supplies? Esme shakes her head. No ropes here. Well, we could at least wait not in the Amber Temple.

Or we could at least, you know... What alternative are you suggesting, Esme? I merely state an encounter that we must pass. Right, right, right. I don't really want to go upstairs either, unless the... Wraith, was it? I mean, the falsely named Undead. He's just going to wander around.

He didn't seem like he was much of a threat on the way in. But if the alternative is just to waste away in this cave, I mean. Esme stands up. She's not impatient. She just isn't making a decision. There is also the matter of what would you like to do with your mentor, Esme? She seems that you could see that there is clear indecision across her face. There is perhaps a way to speak to him, to get some final advice, she says.

Okay. Okay. Okay. What does that mean? Heck, she's lying. She's got some ulterior motive. Speak with undead? Something like that?

There is a ritual, yes. Okay, what kind of ritual? It is right, ancient to my people, the Vistani. And what do you need for it? I would need, we cannot disturb his remains for another hour at least. So. I will need to be alone.

Okay. Well, if. Right. Yeah, yeah, cool. Can you do it here? Yes, it must be done where they

died. That is close, isn't it? You don't pick up on her lying? You just don't know what this ritual is.

Natural suspicion. Sure, yeah, that's fine. Pip is under the impression that both Hector and Esme want to resurrect Van Richten, and

Pip's like, you fucking idiots, he's going to come back as a fucking zombie. He's going to eat back as a fucking zombie. He's going to eat us alive. What happens if you accept that power? I can't look.

My perspective has always very much been you're in charge of your own life. You're in charge of your own destiny. I don't want to be the one telling someone what to do. Well, in that case, then, better let her go do it. Exactly. I'm not one to be like, look, Van Richten, I don't know Van Richten. That's not my mentor. I haven't lost a mentor.

I don't know what to do here. Whereas, like, you know, I can kind of be like, look, here's the pros and cons of both things. Yeah. So, well, look, even before you speak to from history we can say has made Strahd, has made a lich, and has made Father Limmick. I say the name. Whoa. Hector's past hearing. The room rumbles when you say his name.

And then Eileen, who wants to bring about the end of everything. So we know that those are the known entities. Yeah. So if we were to bring Van Richten back, and everything was fine, let us say, let us say, everything is perfect. The advantage is there. Is get your mentor back, of course. A more selfish reason for me is that Iris will have a better chance of survival. It might be her only chance of survival.

Manipulative son of a bitch. That time you both pick up on it. She, like, it might be true, but Esme is not saying that because it's true. Yeah. So there is. Come on, Hector. I know, I know. I am just positing the pros and cons.

Yeah. So we know that. We also know that Van Richten drank a vial of holy water before the end. So he did not want to come back as a ghoul. Yeah, exactly. Now we don't know what will happen if we bring him back. He could be brought back as a ghoul,

as a zombie, as something else, not himself, a vessel. We know that this place, at least not in the Amber Temple itself, but by the Barovia, we do know that this place, at least not in the Amber Temple itself, but by the Barovia, we do know that the spirits do not pass on. They are around. What are the odds in the evil sarcophagus temple

here in the mountains that Van Richten is brought back with no complications? The odds are not in our favor. They never are when you make a deal. I'm here to tell you, it is rarely, if ever, worth the cost. And if you try to bring him back, I will try and stop you. I'm sorry, Hector. We've already got so much on our plate.

What if he comes back as a lynch? Yes, well, exactly. Exactly. I like that it is. So I guess the subtext here is that I guess we're both not wanting Esme to summon or to bring back Van Richten. But Hector wants Esme to get there on her own accord. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whereas Pip doesn't.

Pip doesn't believe she will. Guess what? Yeah. So I will very quickly remind you of the layout of this room. So you're in what is... I'm about to be strangled again. You're in like a lecture room, basically. This would once be a place where people sat down.

Imagine like a lecture room in any university. If you're imagining a Goodwill hunting, you're in the right place. It's a lecture theater. Up the back, there is one door. There is one door exit. Van Richten's stuff is where the lectern is where people would speak.

Where is everyone in the room? Esme would have been basically on the stage where the equipment is. How long did Esme take to look through Van Richten's stuff? An hour, probably. I'm probably sitting down in one of the chairs. There are two sets of stairs on either side of the chairs going up to the back where the door is.

Jack, where are you? I imagine sitting on the stage, if she's there with a bunch of staff sitting on the stage. Cool, kind of, if she's, like, there with a bunch of staff sitting on the stage. Cool, you're both sitting? I am. Yeah. Because, again, I was trying to do this in a non-violent way. It wasn't going to work, let me tell you.

Esme, looking at you, Pip, after you say that, she turns and she just starts sprinting. Fuck! Don't, don't, I call out to Esme. If the roto reversed, what would Van Richten do? She's not listening to you. Not even a persuasion roll, Adam? That would be technically ten rounds, but.

No. Actually, you should have even had disadvantage. Yeah, no. You're not her dad. She's going to get her dad. She explodes out the door up the top. That is her first turn. Let's go to initiative.

Actually, no, it wouldn't be an initiative thing. You're chasing after her, I assume? Yeah. All right, it is an opponent. Like, do I stop you? Dude. Because I'm like... The Amber Temple's making us fight!

Because I'm like... Pip's getting upset! Because there's only... Yeah, I just... I want to intercept Pip. Fuck. We'll see you need for an A-plus year. Come check out our special back-to-school offers. They'll leave you with more cash in your pocket for the stuff you love. Select plans even include data overage protection so you can go all out without going over. Don't wait.

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