D&D is For Nerds - Welcome to Ogg Nott #21 Always Stretch Before Battle

Episode Date: November 29, 2015

Welcome to Ogg Nott Season 1In which our heroes meet the well documented and much beloved NPC Thomas Davoli. We argue hitpoints, someone gets really sick and the priest beats us on the draw. Krifpom doesn't bring up the stretching, Princess Ansley chooses not to get greedy and Leo gets winded. So join us as we do it live! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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and check out all our awesome merch, including our brand new, not at all inspired by the Beatles design, Let It D&D. You can also get a jiggle empty. Now, onwards to the show. There's nothing sadder than a group of adults sitting around a table trying to figure out the difference between metallic and chromatic dragons, but that's exactly what we're doing. Welcome to episode 21 of D&D is for Nerds. I am playing Kriff Pompom. Is that, am I doing good? You're doing great. As always, I'm going to be playing Kriff Pompomkriff. We've got Ali Kathleen playing Princess Ainsley Foggyfeather. Yep. And Joel Zammett playing Leo Shadow. Hi, beautiful. And, of course, our ever-brilliant DM, Adam Cajun Jones. That's not even close. Shut up!

Previously on D&D's for Nerds. I won't grease, but I'm not promising I'm not punching. He picked up a critical sad card. Good sad. I'll run up to the monster and punch it in the mouth. Yes! Fuck you, piece of shit wizard. I've never been so pumped about fucking D&D before.

Carter slumps to the floor, very dead. Oh, yes. I didn't expect this. This is an unexpected win. Let's run over to Grayson and just, like, fill him full of health potions. Yes. Like, rub his tummy and just, like, glug, glug, glug, glug. Oh, you're going to be okay, Grayson. Just everything. I had a bee jiggle, and that helped.

A magic bee. Hey, mate. You have a pick of the wizard. A man looms out of the darkness. Want to see a dead body? Speaking of dead bodies, I assume you don't want to become one, so you've got your rapier in hand, right? Can I stab or just one?

Yeah, no, you can leap forward. You guys were in a pretty close-knit group. Stab, stab, stab. I'm going to get my... It doesn't matter. It's not my turn. Why are you even saying things? I don't know. What's wrong with you?

You are... I don't know if this is a good or a bad... It's a bad. Take like a flying leap forward and jab outwards. Yeah. You, however, come up quite short. You meant to take a 10-foot forward, but you only moved 5 feet forward instead.

Oh, shit. So you're jabbing at the air between the two of you. Okay. Is he threatened by it, though? He smiles and throws his dagger at you. Damn it, son of a bitch. Leo, I mean... Leo got cocky again. Leo, you cocky son of a bitch.

We're too close. He seems to have been aiming for the same place that you were aiming, and his dagger clatters onto the ground. However... I tapped my nose and pointed at him like, I know. I know what this is about. the three of you hear like a telltale flip sound coming from the darkness

and arrows start streaking past you oh my god possibly hit you are they aiming for us? Jesus Christ Ainsley you are hit and Griff I'm fine you are hit. And Griff?

I'm fine. You are missed. You are psychic wizard. Oh, my God. Ainsley, you take seven points of damage. Holy shit. Jesus Christ, seven points of damage? Well, my hit points say 16, so. So you jump up to 23, which means you have four hit points left.

What? How did you do that math? He's just a clever boy. No, no, no. I'm not getting shortchanged because your math has not been... I'm getting the death stare, everyone. No, no, it's okay. You were on 16 hit points.

Yes. Yeah. And then I lost seven, which equals nine. Oh, the way I've been marking it is that 16 damage that you've taken. Have you been marking it the opposite way? I've been going down. So if you have one hit point left, I've got one hit point. No, I've got you marked at four hit points left.

Well, I've got nine hit points left in my... Oh. How many hit points did you say you had? 16. 16? And then I took seven and it went down to nine. No, no, no, no, no. The way I'm counting it, maybe your one is right, but I was counting it that you had? 16. And then I took 7 and it went down to 9. No, no, no. The way I'm counting it, maybe your

one is right, but I was counting it that you'd taken 16 damage. So when you take another 7, it gets added to your 16. I assume Adam's been doing it that way the whole time though. We'll do it your way. That's fine. So you're on 9 hit points now. I have 9 hit points remaining. Yep, that's fine. We'll just do it that way. Adam's not even mad,

Ali. He's so over our shit. I'm just confused. Grayson starts coughing up blood. Oh, no. Griff, it's your turn. No. Summon swarm. Fuck, Griff's turn.

Fix Grayson. Sorry? Summon swarm. Yes. What swarm are you summoning? No. Crabs? How is crabs going to help us right now?

Wasps? Yes. No. Bees. Try again. You can do bats. Bats. Bats.

Spiders. Spiders freak me out, actually. I don't do spiders. You summon a swarm of bats, rats, or spiders. Bats. That's a bat noise. Is that what a bat noise is? So you lift your arms up, and you just scream,

bats, in Draconic. And bats swoop out of your, like, you've got, you know, fucking wizard Yeah, you've got wizard fucking sleeves Not out of your mouth Into someone else's mouth Oh my god, it's a bat question Bats! is my battle cry from now on

Could you get the bats to do like a circle around us so it kind of creates like a protective barrier? I don't know if I can control the bats. I think I can just make them. No, you control the bats. You can make them do something similar. They can't like stretch themselves out like that, but you could like...

They have like an area. They're like a large group sort of thing. You can just have them sit over you. You don't know where the archers are. I understand the bats defied the archers. Is the plan. This is the worst. They're the swamps.

We just found our feet as a relationship, as a power couple. And now as... Did we ever come up with a couple name for you? I think we'll go Grainsley. Grainsley, that's pretty good. Fuck it, we'll do it live. Okay. I don't know what we're doing live, but I'm scared.

Okay, so the swarm of bats, you're sending it out to find the archers? Yeah. Well, you know sort of the direction. Yeah, I can see where the arrows came from, I guess. Oh, shit. Yeah, no, you can actually see down one of the side alleys. You know where they are.

Get them, bats, get them. The bats go do that. Oh, but they won't appear until next turn. Oh, that's okay. Yeah. So you... So you've screamed bats and nothing has happened. Bats!

No, no, no, no. Bats are, like, coming out of his, like, robes, but it won't be until next turn. The bats, like, are in enough numbers to do anything. All right. Just give it time, guys. The bats will be worth it eventually. Your turn?

I'm just going to try and rape you. Oh, wait. Ainsley, what did you do? Nothing. I'm getting angry. You didn't do anything. I would like to shoot someone in the dick. Is it?

You spotted the archers as well. You can fire at them. There's two of them hiding down a side alley. All right. Well, there's a guy who might. Okay. With my rapid shot. Yeah? Do you remember how that works? Yeah. It's With my rapid shot. Do you remember how that works?

It's been a little while. Rapid shot is you fire multiple times but you're less likely to hit. So basically it's like less precision Spray and pray. How many are there? There's two down this side alley.

I'm going to go with precision. You can only hit one then. Yep. Who do you want to hit? Double the good times. Yep, I want to hit the one that looks like he was the most likely to shoot Grayson. None of them shot Grayson. Oh, well, then why am I worried?

Because they might shoot you. They got you. Okay. Rapid shot is used for lightly armored targets. These guys are wearing very light armor. Just get them. Just fuck them up. Rapid shot, rapid shot. Okay. Rapid shot is used for lightly armored targets. These guys are wearing very light armor. Just get them. Just fuck them up. Rapid shot.

Rapid shot. Cool. Do you want to hit the guy out front, like, threatening Leo, or do you want to hit the ones firing arrows at you? The ones firing at me. Sorry, Leo. Two on one or one on each? Two on one is what you were saying.

You got two shots. Who do you want to use them on? You can pick. One on each, yeah. That would make sense. That would be the most nice thing. that'd be the the nice thing to do you miss one but hit the other yes dick uh square in the car yes yep no you yes i didn't mean that you de-man him. Yes. And nip...

What arteries are down there? The carotid artery? Yeah, I think so. You nip that, and so he collapses screaming, and just spurts of blood are coming from that. See, guys, if I hit him in the chest, he might keep fighting back. I guess the dick was a good place to aim. I don't know why I feel that way about it.

Sorry, now we jump back to Liam. I was going to say neck, but hey. That would have been better. It's slow getting started here, guys. Sorry. The guy in front of me. So you take another step forward, and this time, this time for sure, guys.

I'll do this, guys. I got this. Leo, pick up your game. I'm making bats over here. I'm shooting dicks over here.'m making bats she's shooting dicks you're getting critical god damn fumbles damn you're a critical fumble today Leo you haven't been hit yet have you Leo

not at all you step forward this is just it this is how you die you step forward and you tear like a muscle in your ribcage and you're like... I know what that feels like. You are winded.

What does that mean? It means you take negative two to basically everything. Oh, no. God damn it, Leo. This is why we stretch. I need more limber. I'm only little. You guys why we stretch. I need more limber. I'm only little. You guys could have helped.

I know. I'm making bats. The thug you're threatening pulls a short sword. Oh, no. Can I just be like, hey, just time out? Time out, time out. Oh, guys, come on. This isn't unfair.

I'm a little boy. He's got you on the back foot now. You're like rapidly. You have to move backwards very quickly, otherwise he's going to get you with that sword. Okay, but like, you know. The other thug drops his heavy crossbow, the one surviving one in the back alley, drops his heavy crossbow and charges you guys with a short sword.

Too bad bats are getting him. He swings at Ainsley. Oh, shit. Don't worry, Ainsley, Too bad bats are getting him. He swings at Ainsley. Oh shit. Don't worry Ainsley, I got bats coming. Super. Ainsley, you also have to back up pretty quickly otherwise he's going to hit you as well. I will do that. That is good advice. Okie dokie. So Ainsley it's your turn. I would like to

use my long sword and buck him up. Okay, so you can either put your longbow away, which means that you have easy access to it later, or you can drop it. If you drop it, it's a lot faster, a lot easier. But you can't grab it?

Yeah, you'd have to pick it up off the ground. Just fuck it, do that. That's fine. Yeah, nah, nah, drop it. Fuck it, mate. Full of anger. Balls to the wall is how you play D&D. Damn. Every decision is permanent. And the rules don't matter. They do matter.

Don't ever assume they don't matter. Okay. You hit him with your longsword. Yes. Cut his head off. It's a very shallow cut, but it's a long cut from his shoulder down, like, to his knee. Oh, that's rad. Like a decent cut or like a paper cut?

You've either launched the first attack that's going to kill him or you've given him a really sweet scar to show the ladies. Oh, he's not showing no ladies. You don't know his sexuality. He's not showing no... No, he's my NPC. I know exactly. I have crafted this man's background, ladies and gentlemen.

Why? I would like to make sure Adam, ladies and gentlemen. Why? I would like to make sure Adam... Thomas Davoli. Yes. Youngest of five. Let's take down Davoli. Let's take down Papa Davoli's favourite son. I hope all three of these are wrong.

Oh, no, he constantly had to work to make himself be noticed in the Davoli family. I would like to make sure Thomas Davoli never gets to get the ladies with his scar. And I would like to chop his head off. Too bad. Bats. Oh, the bats are not successful. Oh, yeah, yeah, bats. Swarm it. Success, right guys?

Mama never told me about this when we were praying dinner together when I was 10 he says take that Thomas eat bats to foley yeah the bats kill him he gets ripped to pieces do the bats come into my sleeves? sorry?

do the bats retreat to my sleeves or are they still kicking it? they can still kicking it? They can still kick it around for another two turns, so 12 seconds. Oh, no, did we kill the first guy? No, everyone's dead. He's still attacking me. Let's get him on that button. I think the bats can affect him as well, actually.

Oh, sick. No worries, mate. I got bats on my side. The bats kill him, too. Bats! Bats just tear the them both to shreds. Three dead bodies! Anyone who was nearby

freaks out when you summon the bats, Kriff, and they're just like running. Hey, no witnesses. Can I search their dead bodies? No, they're... Yes, you can. I just want to see what they've caught, actually.

So, you can. I just want to see what they've got, actually. Okay. So you find maybe like ten gold between the three of them. Yes. The dagger that that guy threw, three short swords, and two heavy crossbows. All right. The heavy crossbows might be worth some money, but the swords probably aren't.

All right. We'll push their bodies into the sea. It's quite a drag, actually. A little bit from the sea. Okay. Maybe two blocks worth. Just leave them. Whatever.

It's a pirate capital. It's not the first dead body you've seen in the streets. Yeah, exactly. All right, Sig, well, I guess... It's going to be the last. Sorry.

Are they going to be our dead bodies? I might chug the health. Oh, Grayson has collapsed, I should mention, as well. Oh, no! He's getting really high maintenance right now. Give me one of those health potions.

I would like to chug a health potion. I would like to advise Criff Pompomp Criff over here. What type of health potion is it? Cure of light wounds. Cure of light? Yeah. And then I would also like to give one to Grayson, so he will quit his jibber-jabbering.

Ainsley, you recover four hit points. Grayson recovers some as well. How much do I recover? I'm taking one, too. You take two. Yeah, I'll take two. Okay. Are you allowed to do that? It takes two to tango, Ali.

All right. You recover 13 hit points. Maybe I should have chugged too. But no, I'm not greedy like some people. Grayson unsteadily gets to his feet. I gave him a health potion, yeah? Yeah, yeah.

Wave at Grayson. You alright, Grayson? He still looks a bit ill, but he's like moving under his own power now. Can I medicine him? Can I check him out for nearly said for crimes? I just want to investigate his body. out? Nellie said for crimes. I just want to investigate his body. See if he's got the pox.

He appears to have a disease. What? Guys, we need to find a cure. You think it might have something to do with that otherworldly monster that just hoed down on him? I forgot that happened. Guys, how do we fix this? I guess we find a doctor.

I feel like we abandon Goldcrest and then all become doctors. If you decided to just give him medical attention for the next month or so, he might just get over it naturally, or you could go see a priest about it. You said there were some priests? Yeah, you'd probably have trouble finding one right now. It's like late How do we get to one? I don't want to vocalise this to Ainsley

But I kind of look at you, Griff And I'm like, I could just stab him in the throat No, no, no, we love, she loves him Ainsley, you are oblivious to this She loves him, no I'm not surprised Okay, I've put my rape here Like, we can find a priest, it's not even hard

Alright We'll find one here Like, we'll just give it a search. I mean, like, hey, Adahang, what's my medicine? It's heal, the skill is called, and it's one. You can, however, you've heard of this ailment before.

It's called red ache. Manifests itself as red skin bloated. Victims get bloated, and they become warm to the touch. So he checked for a fever. He checked for a fever. And you rolled poorly. How do you fuck up that? Is he hot?

I don't know, baby. It's the early stages of the disease. Can I roll my knowledge to see if I know of any particular cure or anything like that? Or my intelligence or whatever? The only way you know to fight it off is to just

sort of wait it out. Look, Ainsley. Yes, Kriv? He's got what's known as red ache. He's going to get gross. Prepare yourself for that. That's not fun. But we can wait it out. That's an option. Will he go back to sexy?

Yeah, he should go back to sexy. I'm on board, yeah. Willie Adam? I don't know. Am I lying? That's my local knowledge. If you get it healed magically by a priest, everything will return to normal.

But if he has to fight through it, it could leave some stretching, I guess. Ew, gross. I don't bring that up. I'm going to roll my local knowledge to see if I know where our priesty healer person is. Let's fix your

handsome baby boy. You know where you might be able to find one. I got this, guys. We go over to... It's just a priest. Just a priest. You just know where you could find one. I think I know where I could find one. It's over near the... Don't put this on me. You're the one who rolled high enough. You know where you could find one. I think I know where I could find one. It's over near the...

Don't put this on me. You're the one who rolled high enough. You know where it is. I'm not going to tell you where it is, but I don't know. Follow me. Okay, you lead them over. It's near...

You guys are doing this massive round circle. It's back the way you came. Oh my god. What a day. It's back uphill. I'm so tired. Would it be a bad idea to split'm so tired Would it be a bad idea to split up? Yes, it would be a bad idea to split up, never mind Grayson struggles

Do we have to help him? You don't have to help him, and he actually refuses if you offer But it's obvious that he's struggling We don't offer, don't you worry Okay, we'll go all the way up to the temple Or wherever You're actually going directly to this guy's house, his place of residence. Man, my local knowledge is so...

How did you know this, Galeon? Look, I just had an inkling. Just on the way here, you saw a sign. On the way here, I saw a sign. Okay. It makes more sense. So, you get to this guy's house. The bottom part is store, but then the upper part is house.

You know, the sort of arrangement. Yep. It looks like the house part is house. You know, the sort of arrangement. Yep. It looks like the house part, there's like lights lit up. So someone's obviously home, but the bottom part is shut for the night. Cool. We like knock. Foley in the studio. I know.

That's what all the dice are. Jackson didn't see it. Hi or hello? Hi. Yeah, he answers the door It's a very elderly looking man He's like rubbing sleep from his eyes Can I help you?

We need your help, sir One of our comrades has got the red plague No, what has he got? The red ache The red ache It's not the red plague And we need him Neither of these guys are doctors, sir

Unlike you and I. I'm not a doctor. Oh, well, we must have the wrong address. Thank you very much. I'm a priest. Oh, that's right. We need your help, sir. Bring him in.

He steps back and allows you to walk in. Do they even have a word for doctors? First things first, he says. We will negotiate a price. Six silver pieces? I assume it's the same amount as pickling a head. Try 25 gold. Oh, shit.

Ainsley, how much have you got? Is he your boyfriend? 20 gold. There is no negotiating the price. 25 gold it is. Done. I was going to say, can we do like an errand or something for you? Do you need anything done?

He considers that. Yes, yes, you can. What do you want? What do you want? Down to the shop? Bread? Cigarettes? No, I need a man killed.

Oh, my God. This fucking pirate nation. Is it a wizard? It's my competition. Another priest. Not a wizard. Kind of a wizard? Kind of.

You're really good at wizard killing. But hey, priest. All right. He's an old man like me Surely easy Yeah okay cool I explained to him The situation

He's getting more and more Ethnic as we go along I explained the situation That we're kind of Wizard killers And if we could check This on our resume As like a wizard kill

He does not know What a resume is But he follows you For the rest of it Good Yes I have heard Carter dead Yes that was us

So yeah we can kill this priest. Oh yeah, no worries, man. Whatever. Yes. Where is he? Across the street. Yeah. All right.

We'll just jog across. Very convenient. Yes, I think. So can we just do a little bit of a side huddle? So Adam, just stop listening. Where are you leaving Grayson, by the way? Well, that's the thing. Do we leave him here and then we just chew off?

Grayson is in no shape to fight a man. Well, I don't think. Do we leave him here and then we just choo-faw? Grayson is in no shape to fight a man. Well, I don't think he's going to come. Or does someone stay with him? Because I feel like this guy might.

It's a pirate nation. This guy has like pickled body parts. You guys are like, oh man, we should have come to him for pickling that. He looks like he might

also be a necromancer on the side. Mr. Old Man who's going to help us heal. Has he got a lot of security? He's just an old man. That's it? Surely. Easy.

Guys, look. I bring him back into the huddle. Look, we can leave Grayson here. I'll summon that Celestial Justice, babe. He can look after Grayson. Yep. But he's only there for 12 seconds. Look, I'm an assassin.

No, he's there for 18 seconds. Thank you very much. seconds Look, I'm an assassin No, he's there for 18 seconds Thank you very much 18 seconds I'm an assassin I can just shuff over Stab this priest in the neck You're a failed assassin I can go invisible

I love poking holes in your plans You can go invisible I can be stealthy and shit You can stay with Grayson Ainsley Alright Is that what you want to do? Or you want to come and help us kill a priest? You've never killed a priest.

I think Grayson's going to be fine. I think Grayson should be fine. This guy's an old man. He's not going to do shit. I'm going to go up to Grayson and just like brush his hair

behind his ear and be like, we'll be back and then we'll chuff off to kill a priest. Can we get the name of the priest? His name or mine? Is it like Serge? Either or. My name's Serge. to off yeah to kill a priest after can we get the name of the priest uh his name is like so

either or my name's sergey his name is uh dustin not dustin dustin's the farmer's name oh i got so excited i was like i'll kill him i'll kill him sorry uh his name is recording no his name is sergio sergio yeah sure let's go with that. I had, this was not planned. What's his name? His name is Sergio. So we're going to kill Sergio. Yeah. All right, cool.

You go, well, how are you going to, so they're just across the street from each other. They're both two-story buildings, and it's very similar sort of setup, like in this other building with Sergio. The upper level is lit, and the lower level is dark and looks locked. Well, look, what if I climb up the top?

What if we just knock on the door? He answers it, stab him in the throat. Yeah, all right, let's give that a go. Okay. You know what? You do that. You do that. I'm going to sneak up the top and maybe rob him.

I was going to say, I'll knock on the door. We can say our buddy's got the red thingy. See if he can help us. Or you say that. While he's preparing to answer, I'll stab him in the throat. Uh-huh. Okay, yeah. Okay. Yeah.

I mean, I guess that sounds reasonable. It feels weird killing a guy just in the street, but I guess we're here in the pirate nation. Whatever. Oh, you want me to pick a lock? Yeah, you pick the lock. Oh, I don't know. Look, how about you do that,

but I'll go upstairs in case he tries to run. All right. So you're going to scale... I'll pick a lock. I'll pick a lock, Adam. I'll scale the wall up the back and climb in a window. Okay, and Ainsley, what are you doing? Make sure you're invisible.

I will... I was like, I will make sure I'm invisible. He's not talking to me. I thought he was talking to you as well. It was weird. Yeah, I'll just be like a lookout for Leo. Okay, just going to like stand across the street and just keep an eye out? Yeah.

Yeah. You have trouble picking a lock, Leo. Oh, my goodness. He had one job. I scramble up the wall up the back. Are you invisible as well, Kriff? Oh, yes. Like you wouldn't believe. So, Kriff, you're invisible.

I sure am. Ainsley, can I get a high or a low, thanks. Low. Low? Uh-huh. Okay. Oh. As you're reaching the window, Kriff, the lights all go out on the upper level

You put a hand on the sill and the lights go out That means he's gone to bed There's no windows There's no glass I can just climb in I assume It's kind of that tropical kind of I'll just clamber in then Trying to stealth that I assume

Yeah, it's either gone to sleep or or trap hey either or you know my philosophy either or a trap or something good you slip in unnoticed uh you see a form huddled like on a bed and he's like lying on his side it's obviously the priest and he's asleep okay uh while that's happening leo you pick a lock yes yay you open the door i check for traps okay that's a good idea you've you actually know you set it off yep you brought a lot of ones today you set off the trap crap uh just this like loud like bop, bop, bop in the entire building. You know enough about traps to detect that as a magical alarm spell. The priest wakes up.

Oh, my God. You go to initiative. I attack him. Justice B, Justice B, Justice B, Justice B. Justice B, Justice B. Justice B, Arthur? Yes. Priest beats you on the draw.. Justice B. Arthur? Yes. Priest beats you on the draw.

Oh, fuck. Oh, no. Damn it, Leo. I'm sorry. This is probably why he didn't get into the, like, the academy. Priest goes first. Better at killing than lockpicking.

Don't worry, he's a priest. He can only heal. Priest points his hand at you and prays to his god to smite you down with unholy might. Oh no, not mites. They're the worst. I'm gonna get bedbugs. Jackson, you're in a lot of trouble.

A bolt of lightning comes out of the sky and hits you. Oh boy. I didn't think that would happen, guys. Because it's inside a house. Fucking magic, mate. It goes through the roof. It's off chops.

You take 13 points of damage. Hey, who's on one again? Is it your boy, Criff on Pom-Cruff? I think it might be. It is. Okay. So that puts it at your turn Arkryf

Justice B Justice B you summon the B he comes around the next turn I just punch him I just punch him in the face I gave you that improved unarmed didn't I that's gonna come in handy now

I go to summon the B I'm like wait a second no you take a swing at him but he like dodges somehow this fucking old man this fucking wily one i'm like how you're like it's more that you're like battering on him and he's just brought his arms up to block you uh leo something is wrong You heard a bolt of lightning. I run up the stairs. Okay, you move through. Come on, Ainsley.

The stairs to get up, the stairs to go up are locked. There's like a trap door thing, which is also locked. Oh, my God. Pick the lock. And Ainsley, what are you doing? I am going to pull out. Oh, actually, Ainsley. Yes.

Yeah, no, it's good that you did. You can just make out Kriff in the window. I'm not going to pull out. Oh, actually, Ainsley. Yeah, no, it's good that you did. You can just make out Criff in the window. I'm not going to aim at him, but I'm going to aim at whatever he's trying to punch. It's hard to see, but you could. It's hard to see, but you can try. Climb up and shoot through the window. Or whatever.

I don't give a fuck. You could shoot from where you are, but it's a rough shot. That's what I'm saying. No, do it. It'll be funny. Yeah, nah, rough shot. Rapid shot? Rapid shot, yes. I think I might have just killed Kriff, guys. Hey, whatever. It's okay. Kriff is

hard to kill. He's only on one. I'm exceedingly difficult to end. I feel like this might be it, though. Nuh-uh. Although that Adam silence was a bit disconcerting. No! What's your armor class? Oh, wait, I have it right here.

14. Yep. An arrow hits you in the back. Oh, no! Oh, Jesus! No, no, no, no, no, no! You take two points of damage. Hey, I'm at negative one.

I'm at negative one, guys. Far out! I like to think before I fall, I just turn around to look at you, and I'm like, what? Okay, it's the priest's turn. Leo, the door opens, like, before you've finished picking the lock, and you're staring at the priest and he's staring at you and there's just an awkward moment.

Jackson. Cocked. Jackson, you go to negative two. Oh, my God. Please, guys. Leo, it's your turn. Rapier. Neck.

I'm going to say he's surprised. Oh, my God. A little man. You hit him. Yes. And you do your sneak attack damage. Oh! Which doesn't count for much.

Well, it's better than nothing. That's true. Yeah, that's true. I'm not allowed to argue legally. I cannot argue with that fact. You hit him for six points of damage in total. Hey! Hey, six points of damage is better than zero point damage.

I did better than you, fucking Griff, you son of a bitch. Hey, I would have done better if Ainsley hadn't shot me in the back. You're pretty sure he fucked up. You don't know how colossally, but you're pretty sure you hit Griff, and now you can't see Griff. I think I might run over to Griff and maybe have a little bit of a health potion. Are you going to go climb up or through the door? Climb up.

Help me. Where are you? Are you in the top window? He's on the second floor. He's on the second floor. question. Are you going to go climb up or through the door? Climb up. Help me. Where are you? Are you in the top window? He's on the second floor. He's on the second floor. Yeah, I'm going to just bolt, like not even worry about anything, just bolt up the window like a champ

and then just jump in, probably fall in. Wait, are you going up the stairs? No, she's climbing the wall. Oh, okay. And then I'm going to pretty, pretty much give him a help. You make slow process climbing up. You manage to get to the windowsill and you're looking in. You can see you can see Griff lying

face down with an arrow in his back. Charred. Like, singed. Yeah, a little bit. There's a hole in the roof. Oh, no. But you already you saw the lightning bolt. This is not a surprise. That puts it at, oh, the priest is turning. The priest is like freaking out, like, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God.

He takes a step back and he asks his God to, no, wait, he doesn't take a step back. He tries to put his hands on you. And as he does that, he asks his guard to make you ill. Don't let him touch you. If I was there I would say. I just realised we probably could have just asked him if he could heal. Yeah. I feel like this was an ill-fated journey from the get-go.

We could have an old sneaky double. An ill-fated journey. Double cross, but we didn't. Fuck. We should be cleverer. So, double cross, but we didn't. Fuck. We should be cleverer. So, good news, bad news, which one first? Bad news. Bad news, you are taking damage. Good news.

Good news, well, we'll probably have to wait until next week on D&D is for Nerds. If you think this show is worth at least a dollar, why not donate to our Patreon account? Follow the links on our website, sandspantsradio.com. Hey there, fellow adventurer. If you're picking up what we're putting down and want more D&D content, we have just what you need to scratch that itch.

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