D&D is For Nerds - Welcome to Ogg Nott #7 Those Greasy Zombos

Episode Date: August 23, 2015

Welcome to Ogg Nott Season 1In which our heroes discover that, sometimes, zombies are smarter than bands of adventurers. We offer our services to a poor farmer, travel to a zombie infested small town and pull some Mr Bean bullshit with the undead. Krif has arcane knowledge that he chooses not to use when stealing farm tools, Princess Ansley hurts the Dungeon Masters feelings and Leo gets in the way again. So join our party try to work out how good they are at stealth (the answer MAY surprise you!). Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sands Pants Radio, help, my arms fell off. There's nothing sadder than a group of adults sitting around a table rolling dice to fight our own imaginary cat. But that's exactly what we're doing today. Welcome to the seventh episode of D&D is for Nerds. I'm Ali Kathleen, playing the role of Ainsley Foggyfeather. Over here we've got Joel Zammett, playing the role of Leo Shadow. Hiya. And the interesting Jackson B. Bailey, playing the role of Kiff-Kya. And the interesting Jackson B. Bailey

playing the role of Kiff, Kiff, Kiff, Kum. Kiff, Pum, Pum, Kiff. Yeah. And Jackson, hold on. Thank you so much. And never forget our amazing DM, Adam Karpatz. Guys, that's not my name. Shut up, Adam.

Previously on D&D is for Neds. Let's try to sell this head. 85 gold and you leave tonight. We just killed this wizard for you. Now you want us to leave? You're rude. Let's go buy an elephant. I want a fancy, Adam.

I got a bell. Do we want to name our mule? Cart, Michael. Oh my God, yes. We got a loot. The tavern is completely uninhabited except for the bartender at the bar and two people hunched over near the fire.

Good morrow, yon barkeep. Undead, I tell you. Undead. They're infesting the place. I poked my head. Undead, you say? If you can go and do this for us, plus anything you can take... Any moose heads. We'll get you as many moose heads as you can carry as well.

So after a night's sleep, you're up by the next morning's light, and it's definitely a lot warmer during daytime. You're very glad you didn't choose to go out in the snow at night. But I act like we should have gone out in the snow. I lie. I lie about that. The farmer meets you downstairs. He looks like he's been

waiting for like maybe an hour. He's like already finished his meal and stuff, his breakfast. Have we kept you? No, no, no.

I wanted to see you before you left. All right. So I could tell you where the town was. I thought it was this town. It's not? No.

It's a small village. Small village to the east. We were going to go to the crypt. Lucky. Lucky we ran into you. We would have just... That would have been embarrassing. We would have just dug up dead bodies and stabbed them.

No, it's... I live in a small village. Maybe eight hours travel from here. All right. Eight hours? It's okay. It's okay. Oh, my God. We're not going to role play

all of those eight hours. You know that. Real time. Real time, Elle. I thought maybe we could have slept walked and then we would have already been there and we'd be fine. I don't know how you can... Anyway. Let's get cart Michael. Let's get cart hopping cart Michael and chuff towards the town.

You guys are so lucky this farmer needs you. He's not just like, never mind. He would not deal with you. We don't have an undead problem. It's fine. I'll deal with it. He picks up his little sickle thing.

Yeah, I got it. I've done this. Look, I'll farm him. I'll throw potatoes at him. I'll pitchfork him in the guts. I don't care. Anything. Anything other than this.

I can lead you some of the ways there, but to get into the town itself, it's no place for the likes of me. Too many undead? Yes. It's infested, like I said. All right. Let's do this then.

I believe the source of it to be somewhere in the crypts itself. If you delve into there, you could find whatever's doing this and put an end to it. I'm asking if anybody strange has been through his town recently. Anybody who looks a little suspicious. That wasn't us. We're not suspicious. Well, you haven't been through his town recently.

Yeah, we thought we had, but I have local knowledge. What does that do? It allows you to know about where a tavern might be, like a local bandit force or something like that. Tells you about the people local to an area. So, yes, actually. There was a hooded stranger. We didn't think much of it at the time.

He was only passing through briefly. But one of my lads saw him around the crypt the night before it happened. Sounds like that's your guy. Yeah, I reckon it was him. I don't want to do any more detective work. I'm pretty sure that was the guy the night before it happened. Sounds like that's your guy. Yeah, I reckon it was him. Like, I don't even want to do any more detective work. I'm pretty sure that was the guy. That's the guy.

We'll go kill him for you. Oh, I thought we were just going to leave. Where are you? Job done. You're a great detective. Where's our 275 gold pieces? Cough up, mate. We did it.

And our moose heads. And our moose heads. Good. All right, let's lead the way then. Young farmer. What's your name, young farmer? Dustin. All right, Dustin.

Hoffman? Dustin Hoffman? I don't have a surname. Oh, what? Dustin the farmer. Dustin farmer. Justin son of Hoff? Son of no one important.

David Hasselhoff. Son of no one important. I mean, Dustin, look. Sometimes it's all right to look at your background and be proud of where you came from. You don't have to be ashamed. Even if they're undead. It's all right. Dustin, son of Torn.

All right, Dustin, son of Torn. Thank you, Dustin. Yeah. That was more for us than you. You knew that, didn't you? It's okay to open up sometimes, Dustin. Dustin has a bad cart ride. Trust a bit more.

Dustin asks if you have horses. No. It's a lot less shorter a journey with horses. I'll go borrow some horses, he says. We hop in cart, Michael. You hop in cart, Michael? We climb inside him. So we get horses now?

Just temporarily. Temporary horses. By Cart Michael. You stay here, Cart Michael. So with the horses, it's maybe only two hours instead of eight. That's a big difference. You're making speed. Our mule is shit.

Your mule is forced to go as fast as you are and is also hitched to a wagon. Just saying. Yeah. You come to, like, a gentle slope down to what is obviously a village. It's maybe only ten houses, and then you can see the only stone building is what appears to be the crypt,

and dispersed among them are undead shambling around. Dustin, like, slows down his horse here and says, I can't go any further. Dustin, quick question. These crypts,

do people booby trap them? No, there shouldn't be booby traps. Some of the individual coffins might be, but... God damn it. Keep checking for traps. Always check for traps. Booby trapping. Samit, always check for traps.

I don't know. Some people are paranoid, he says. That's fair enough. Can I use knowledge arcana to figure out what kind of zombos these are? Or like the shit about them? Yeah. So, you know know some basics about zombies hey guys so let me just school you in zombos zombinis zoms zams zombie zombies you're just

are you making up words to seem more important than you actually are just stolen for time let me tell you about zombies zombies 101 aha I explain whatever the fuck Adam's going to say to you all. Thank you, Chris. Yeah, zombies are more often than not created via the magics of like an evil wizard. Sometimes clerics can do it as well, but it's less common. It's less common. Basically, they are, like I said a while ago, they're not like George Romero things.

You don't destroy the brain. It's just so long as they have a working body, they'll keep coming after you. The guys don't get bitten. It's about just breaking the body to the point where it can't be used anymore. So bludgeoning weapons, if you can, like, you know, bats or a mace or something like that. Longswords

and piercing weapons like bow and arrow do less damage to them in total. Okay. Also, yeah, they don't really like, they're mindless. They don't fear anything, but they're not going to use anything other than maybe swarm tactics. Dustin, do you

have a bludgeoning item I could perhaps borrow? Times three. He takes a club off the side of his horse and hands it to you. Thank you. It's a simple weapon, just a bit of wood, but it's all he has. That's alright. Probably better than my rapier. Better than my rapier? They're about the

same. The club is slightly better against undead, but specifically there. You want to use the rapier any other time. Okay, but I'll use the club now. Yeah. How many clubs do you have? Let's find out, he says, picking up some dice. Every morning I pick up a random number of clubs.

That's a little ritual of mine. High or low? Lower. Low? Sorry, I only have one. Wait, no, I said higher. Yes, that'll trick him. How are you genius?

Ainsley, are you suffering a heart attack, I feel? It's going to be really embarrassing for me when I'm listening to this and I'm like, damn it, she got me. She did say lower. Can I see the crypt from here? Yeah, you can see the Yes So what's my attack

But do I need to write anything? It's okay You just say when you want to use the club I know your stats Okay That was terrifying Dustin like sort of Gestures around

There's like Sparse trees in the area You might be able to find like A club from one of them Or even A staff to use Ainsley Ainsley Ainsley ainsley ainsley ainsley ainsley a loot i give you the loot yes that'll break easily yeah whatever it's how it's

become tiresome in the year since that we've been what do you mean tiresome i thought i was providing good entertainment a long Joe Long time ago With a performance skill of negative one I would disagree I thought I You guys never said anything But look, you were just having such a good time I thought I was bringing joy and entertainment

Did you not wonder why we hid it from you sometimes? I thought we were having a funny game No, not the case A little bit betrayed Dustin from you sometimes. I thought we were having a funny game. No. Not the case. A little bit betrayed. Dustin listens patiently to you guys. You're a champ, Dustin. Then he says,

so would you, how long do you think this is going to take you? Four minutes. I'll wait here then. No, Dustin's son. She was joking. Are they your first 24 hours? I'll wait here then Dustin's son she was joking how many undead are there in the first 24 hours? let's say like a good 24 hours Dustin

I'll head back to Theron not Theron Fox Terrier I glanced at the map and I saw the wrong city of Huskies Fox Terrier in the country of huskies. Yep. Fox, terrier in the country of huskies.

Sick. We'll see. Okay, he rides off. All right, so we can see the crypt from here. Does it look like it's conceivable to get there by sneaking? You reckon you could, yeah. It's like on the edge of town, and the zombie horde is primarily based in the town itself. You'd have to go around, but you could, yeah. It's like on the edge of town, and the zombie horde is primarily based in the town itself.

You'd have to go around, but you could. How much is a zombie horde? $40. Damn, we haven't got that. $35 for you, though. We've only got $20. Fuck. Well, if you want, you can lease the horde.

No, all right. We'll need a down payment, though though You reckon you can spot maybe 15 odd 15 odd So if we attack one They're all going to come at us Or are they all sort of individually The town is very sparsely With buildings very sparse

So you think yeah If you started a fight they'd all just here and come Let's try and sneak so hang on Ainsley that's not really a noble womanly princessly can you sneak? what do you like at sneaking?

well I mean I snuck around the castle a bit but that's probably why bum pinching endeavours and that's probably why they don't want me back, to be honest. Let's just say, like, if someone put all of my skills on a piece of paper, where would they be? What would your snake be? Just like...

Oh, metagaming. Well, I just would like to know from, like, the past. I'm sure I've seen a trine snake in the past. Look at that. what is that? From past performance, you guys are all decent. So there's two different stats that govern sneaking. There's hide and move silently because D&D is a pain like that. So... 9-11.

I'm pretty good at hiding. Okay. You're decent at both. Oh, I am. The same. Yeah, no. I'm pro at it from all my bum-binging. Your bum-binging?

Well, Ali goes in a bum-binge. Ainsley bum-binging like crazy. Can we just go back as again, Jackson, ask me again how good my binging is? The levels go Leo, Ainsley, and then... I'm the worst. You're still pretty good, though. Norby and Mighty asking Ainsley if she's good at sneaking. Jigglelump's got your back, though. He gives you plus stuff.

Is that including Jigglelump? Yeah, it's including. You're all decent. You're all decent. He's a piece of shit. All right, so we'll decide to sneak. Yeah? Yeah, we sneak in.

We hunker down. We get all fucking close to the ground and cold. Sneak our way in. This one requires six dice. That's a lot of dice. Did we win? Did we win? Shut up.

Have we won Dungeons & Dragons? You get up behind the crypt and you do it without being noticed. Fuck yes, high fives all round. Super. You can hear the cries of the dead up close now. The graveyard beyond this crypt, so it's like graveyard and then a crypt at the end of it. You're behind the crypt on the opposite side from the graveyard

and in the graveyard you can hear, there's maybe four or five of them just trudging around there. So maybe if we sneak into the crypt? Can we? Can we? What about this? What about if I shoot off dancing lights and distract the zombies?

You have a bell. Are you suggesting I run with the bell? I suggest you throw the bell with your awesome powers. You know what I fucking should do? I should use Mage Hand. I use Mage Hand on the bell.

Mage Hand allows me to manipulate objects, like limited shitty telekinesis. So I take out the bell, I lift that shit up, I just slowly move it out to where the zombies are and just start jingling it. How far do you want to move it away from you? Like keys to where we can. Right into the center of those five zombies.

Oh, okay. So you're drawing them to the center of the graveyard? Yes. Away from us. Wherever. Oh, yeah. On the opposite side of the graveyard. On the opposite side of the graveyard, yes.

Yeah, okay. So the bell starts ding-da-ding-da-ding-da-ding. That's the best gold piece we've ever spent. The zombies all turn around and start shuffling over towards the bell. Sneak in, sneak in, sneak in, you fucks. Check for traps, I guess. It's going to take you like a minute to check for traps. Risk it. Risk it.

Risk it for the biscuit. You've got to risk it. Risk it. You've got to get risk it if you want to get the biscuit. I just said that. So the crypt itself is this very small building. It's got like a wrought iron door to get in. And when you go through the wrought iron door,

there's just stairs that go down into the crypt is mainly underground. This small building is just like the entryway basically. You open the crypt door without much hassle and you get down the stairs as well. You find yourself in a small crypt area. It's like a long corridor, and either side there are coffins

stacked up. The corridor ends and turns left. I'm so spooked. You can hear zombies in here as well. Ah, poo. Ah, poo. I'd like to take out an alchemist's fire, just for in case. I want to do a little of a sneak look. Okay.

To see how many of them zombos there are. A classic sneak peek. You peer around the corner. A Leo sneak peek. You look around the corner and you see there's maybe another five. It's like another corridor and this corridor ends in like a door. There's five down this turn area. I go to the corner.

Do you let me know? I let you know there's five. Can I? My plan. I'm going to sneak behind the five, and then just attack the one at the back, while you guys attack the one at the front. Maybe they just split up, and they don't know where to go. So you're going to go around the one at the front. Maybe they just split up and they sort of... They don't know where to go.

So you're going to go around the back of the group whilst we go around the front of the group. Yeah. Pinch of that shit. Yeah, all right. Let's do it. All right. That's the plan.

I was just going to throw Alchemist's Fire at them. No, we only have one Alchemist's Fire. We might need that for that clearly hooded necromancer. The guy's clearly a necromancer. That farmer didn't even know. Idiot. I have no arcane knowledge. Even I know that.

Did you notice that the guard was like, the farmers aren't going to have anything right in front of that farmer? That was so rude. I'm just sitting there like, dude, he's right here. Farmers, they make a fine living. For the listeners at home, I've drawn a map.

Oh, you can't see it. I completely forgot. Just hold it up to the microphone. Yeah, I'll hold it up to the microphone. So there's the graveyard there, and then there's the crypt itself, the building, stairs going down, and then one corridor turning. Actually, I've done the wrong. Either way.

It turns around and there's a door at the end so it's like an L shaped corridor and there's five zombies there so if Samit sneaks around to where the door is to attack from the back and we attack from the front is our current game plan

so I'm going to go sneak past the zombies oh I see well it's going to be a tough one because you'll be moving in among them. Yeah. Basic. You got this, Zamsie. Using my sneak and evasion skills.

Yeah, you like get right up to them and then they notice you. Hey, you got close. No, I trot. Alchemist's fire. Right there. Okay. So I'm at's it Just swallowed whole The end

I guess I can not Speak as well as I thought It was quite a tight corridor I was impressed that you wanted to go for it Flew too close to the sun As we all know Leo Shadows Downfall He that he just,

he thinks he's the best. Leo, you're first. Oh, awesome. Combat begins, by the way, just in case you guys didn't realise. I'm going to grab my fucking club and just start way away at that first. You warmed the fucker. Zombo. Club that Zombo in the dick, Sam.

All my halflings dicks You suck him You mean to hit him in the head But you swing too low and too hard And you hit him in the groin instead The zombie does not care Zombos don't have proper dicks anymore That's the first bit that rots away I don't know if that's true

Don't fucking quote me on that lesson you have arcane knowledge it is true they start crowding around you but the zombies are really slow and only the one in front of you actually gets a chance to attack the others just like shuffle up towards you uh yeah he like tries to but you, like, just dart out of his reach. Yeah. It's like his fetid breath is just, like, in your everything. Guys, I made a mistake. Guys, put your eyes. But it's great because you're so little, but it's, like,

it's clearly hard for them to get at you. Ainsley. Yes. Do you want me to do something? No, you can just, you know. Watch. I just wanted to talk. How are you doing?

Are you enjoying this? Having a good time on the journey? What do you think of me as a DM? I feel as though if I could take an arm of the zombie, could I beat other zombies with the arm? That's another question I asked. Don't avoid the question. I think I know what that means okay

so you want to tear one of their arms off and beat them to death I'm just asking if it would work well technically yes then I'm doing that you could try to tear an arm off clearly he was about to say no you could try to make out with the zombie

no cut off the arm with the zombie. No, cut off the arm with a long sword, like clean cut off and then use that arm or leg as some sort of tool to blood him. You like charge in. It could go either way sometimes.

He's either mystified at our bullshit or mystified that the dice is allowing him to have to do this bullshit. You charge in with your longsword and it's not even a ranged attack but somehow Leo gets in the way. This is why we can't have nice things, guys. It's just a little boy.

A little boy. You have to turn your blade at the last minute or hit Leo as well. Why just carry on and hit Leo? You know what, guys? You have one more chance. We're going to avoid you now. Next time, if you're in the way, fair game.

Right. At the last minute. Every time I describe her missing, I describe her missing because of you guys' incompetence. Always. Oh, boy. Crit, it's your turn. God damn it, I got a F.

F, F, F. Grease. Fuck. Grease the ground. Get greased, zombies. Suck up that one, zombies. Leo, you need to make a... Invasion. Balance. Oh, I roll your balance, that's right.

Get greased, guys. You'll beasion. Balance. Oh, roll your balances, right? Get greased, guys. You'll be all right. Yeah. Okay. The zombies, because they're not moving around much, aren't falling over, but if you can get them to move, then they might. Basically, what grease is good for is just making enemies trip up.

Trip the enemies, guys. I've done half the work. What if we just slide? Run and slide. Knee slide. Power slide. Up with the loot. Slide through that grease backwards and fling a...

No, no, no. You're going to like this one. You put one foot up, put it in the center of mass of the zombie and kick off. And you just gracefully slide backwards. And as I'm doing so, fling a bullet at him. Now you fucked up.

Oh no. Your reach exceeded your grasp. Okay, so you try to fire a bullet from your sling and as you do so, you realize that you're about to release the bullet too late and nearly hit yourself with it, so you just don't. You just don't.

Good. That's not. Let's just keep sliding. Okay. They come after you. Zambo's turn. One trips. Yes. One gets through. Two trip. Yes. Three trip. Yes.

Four trip. That's it. Four of them are just like a writhing mass of zombies on the floor and one of them makes it through. That's what you want. We kill that one and then just walk away. Because it like gets up to you again, Leo, but because they're so slow, it just can't attack.

Oh, good. Good. Just punch it. Ainsley? Ainsley, just punch it. Yeah, I think I'm going to punch it. Just punch the fucking zombie. For real, you're just going to punch it?

I feel like that's a bad idea. No, just clock him in the fucking jaw. Yeah, no, peer pressure. Let's do this. Okay. You clock him in the jaw and he bites your hand. Guys, that's the worst advice ever. He's a wizard.

I don't know how to fight. You take three points of damage. Hey, that's alright. You've got more HP now. Also, I guess you didn't really know it. I'll just let you guys know because it's fun for the listeners to know. So, when you punch

someone, you deal non-lethal damage which zombies are immune to. Oh, I see. You've done nothing but hurt yourself. Not enough. You didn't know enough. Hey, you're right. Imagine like the moment your feet,

your fist connects with the teeth, you just look at me. Just a single turn. You zombie munching on your hand you're a piece of shit uh anyway so yes ali's getting a hand job yep i'm gonna take my hand away uh griff it's your turn i would like to i would like to throw my spear. Why not? At a zombie. I don't have anything that bludgeons. Yes, I do. Oh, no, the bell's outside.

Fuck. Summon a plank of wood and then throw that. Yes! Actually, yes. Block of wood. Blockade. Help! It's how I imagine that spell.

You struggle as if you were going to shit yourself and a five foot by five foot block of wood materializes in front of you. Five foot by five. How wide is the corridor? It's about ten foot. So this takes up half of the corridor, guys. Also, it is too heavy for you to lift.

Can I push it? Yeah, on the grease. I like to push it into the zombies. On the grease, it just slides down. Can we just, like, Jackson Belly? You knock the other zombie to the ground. Most ingenuitive wizard ever. The block of wood just, like, slides completely down the corridor

and bumps into the wall at the end. Awesome. Did it just collect all the zombies? It knocked some of the ones that were trying to get up. Oh yeah, that's right. I was like filling the corridor like a steamroller. The zombies spend their turn getting up and that's their turn.

Can we go through the door while they're doing stuff? Can we go through the door while they're doing stuff? I'll just keep chasing us. Close the door behind us and then use the lock. We do have an amazing lock, guys. But I feel like we're going to need that down the track. I don't want to waste our amazing lock

just like on the first door we see. I'm trying to think. Have any of you done damage to a zombie? No. No. This has been some fucking Mr. Bean bullshit. His whole combat

Some slidey motherfucking British slapstick nonsense Fucking slidey little people That's been this Magic Sorry, that was, now it's Leo's turn That's been this. Magic. Bludge. Are they zombies? Sorry, that was... Now it's Leo's turn. Are the zombies up or are they striding?

They're on the ground. I was going to go. The closest one. And kick him in the head. And just get my club and just slam it into his face. As though you were mortar and pestling a zombie. Yes. I can't fuck this up, right?

You all prove. No, you get him. Oh, good. You crush his head. Good. It doesn't stop moving., right? You get him. You crush his head. Good. Like an egg? It doesn't have teeth anymore. Let's just get fucking Ainsley over here to cut off its arms and legs.

Sure. Have some stump friends. Then you can cut its legs off, arm off, and it can use a club. Yeah! Yeah, that's what we're gonna do. Okay. Good. Paraplegize these zombies. So the zombie in front of you bites at you.

Oh, no. I crushed his head. Oh, right. He grabs you and starts just tearing at you with his arms. Cut them off. We're going to cut them off. We'll cut them off. Yeah.

He tries to grab you, but you're like... You're like dancing around his arms. Stupid, greasy zombie. Stupid, greasy zombie. Always ruining my good times. The other zombies start to advance on you again. They're surrounding you again. Just punch you and make you a dick again.

They're surrounding you again, Leo. That worked so well last time. Ainsley? Yes, cutting off arms. Slice off some arms. You hit. Yes. Slice it off.

You make a good effort to hack an arm off. Oh, my goodness. Oh, you're ruining it. These zombies. That's the sound you guys are making for me. You embed your sword in its shoulder, but it doesn't seem to care. Oh my god, zombies are a hassle.

I'm just going to push that block again. Squish them. It's on the other side of the place. Summon another block. Hey, yeah, how many blocks can I summon? As many spells as you have. I don't know how many spells I have. It's on that page

The other one? No no You have Oh next one? Whoop Oh yeah I see it Spells per day Cool cool cool

Easy What are you doing? Is it me? Yes it's your turn Oh fuck I didn't even think Help You got as far as

How many spells How many blocks can I summon a day That's all I needed to know Can I scatter spray some bones From the crypt Yeah there's a lot of shit all over the place Let's go nuts How much am I gonna die

You've got evasion now If you make the save you're good No more bones in the back of your skull. Hey! You take no damage. Sick. Zombies take some damage. Damn right they bloody well do.

Angel, you knife in the back again? That would be unfortunate. Very unfortunate. Hilarious, though. Yeah, you just dig up shit from all over the there's like some very old looking coins, bones bits of rock just shit

flies up at these zombies and knocks them about like ragdolls in the grease? or is the grease drying up by this point? they're kind of past the grease at this point it's a very small area of effect do you guys want more grease? Maybe not.

We'll keep going next turn, I guess. We could do some more grease. So, that puts it at Leo's turn. Can I run past the zombies and just slide to the grease on the other side? You can,

but they get free attacks on you if you do that. Just do it. You good. Actually, I think you do have tumble. Yeah, you do. So you can tumble past them. If you fail, they get the attack. But if you succeed, they don't.

Do it, man. All right. Fuck the police. Let's just go. Yeah? Yeah. Samit, always go for it. Never think.

I'm sorry, Samit. Just, ah, sword across the top of the skull Does a backflip into a zombie Four of the five Oh no It's gone, it's lost to time Four of the five zombies get a free hit on you

Oh no, Samit, I killed you again. Why does anybody listen to me? Not all of them will hit. Some of them did, though. Evasion. No, evasion's only for magical spells. Damn. Oh, Zammett, I'm so sorry if you're dead.

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. You take ten points of damage. Jesus. What are you on? I am on two. Oh my god, I am on two. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. Like, one of them catches you in the chest and greatly wins you.

Then, like, that slowing down of you allows another one of them to fucking clock you in the face with the club. You just got blood freely flowing. I've ever done. Yep. Oh, my God. I'm sorry. It's all right.

Hey, it was a risk. You took it. I took sorry. It's all right. Hey, it was a risk. You took it. I took it. That's on you. You can keep going, though. You can get to the other room. You can get the other side. They just got to hit you.

That's all. Slide past the grease, and I want to, like, push the block of wood back at them. You ineffectually push the block of wood. You're tiny, Sam. You're a tiny man. But it was greased up. It's not that greased up.

And you are a tiny man. He is somewhat correct. Ainsley, push the block of wood. Pushing the only wood. Ainsley, tumble past them. That's their turn. Great. Jackson, they're bearing down on you now.

I'd like to drink the potion of Mayjama. Okay, when you get your turn, you may do that. Me hostia. One of them tears at you. Guys, help. You take seven points of damage. Oh, boy. Ow.

Yeah, it's like 7 just reached in tore out a lung or something uh oh like casually very nonchalantly these zombies are tough that was the max damage they could roll still

still I'm frightened not great okay so that puts it at uh Ainsley

Ainsley come on push the block of wood tumble to the block of wood. Tumble to the block of wood and push that shit. You can't tumble. That's an ability only Leo gets. What? But not very well, though. I don't know why I'm gloating. You do alright. You rolled a one, unfortunately.

Oh my god. Zabot is a man of extremes for some reason. Yeah. He really, really is. What the fuck? It's scary. Ainsley, just fucking gun it. To push the block away? Or just loot one of these guns.

Or be helpful. Yeah. Don't listen to this guy. That's true. I've lost a lot. So will Ainsley be helpful? Will she not? Find out next time on D&D is for Nerds.

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