De-Influenced with Dani + Jordan - Cutting My Mom in Half & Other Normal Life Updates

Episode Date: February 5, 2026

Today we’re doing a full life catch-up and talking through everything that’s been happening lately, from funny moments to some more thoughtful conversations. Dani shares the sweetest morning with her pregnant friends, we attempt a cool date night at one of the hottest spots in Dallas and somehow still end up in bed by 9, and then things really spiral when we hire a magician to literally cut Tornado in half for a vitamin shoot. You know. Normal life stuff. We also talk friendships, parent life, planning Dani’s baby “drizzle,” and the pressure to have an opinion about everything on the internet. Just real conversations, a little chaos, and us figuring it out as we go. We rounded up some great deals from a few of our favorite brands for you: For a limited time, new Cash App customers can earn $10 if they use code FAMILY10 in their profile at sign up and send $5 to a friend within 14 days. Terms Visit containerstore.com and use code DANI at checkout for a discount on your purchase. These viral pj's are so good they sold out during the holidays, and now they're back with an exclusive deal only available January 25th - February 8th. Check out their bamboo and Sutton pajama collection at cozyearth.com. Use my code DANIBOGO to get these pj's for you and someone you love! We've worked out a special deal with Hiya for their best selling children's vitamin. Receive 50% off your first order. To claim this deal you must go to hiyahealth.com/DANIAUSTIN. This deal is not available on their regular website. Let Omaha Steaks deliver high-quality proteins right to your door. Visit OmahaSteaks.com and get an extra $35 off, with promo code DEINFLUENCED at checkout. If you're ready to take the next step in your life, whether that is merch, your own hair care line, or something in between, go to shopify.com/dani and make it happen. It doesn't matter where you're at in your entrepreneur journey, Shopify is there to make your life and selling journey easier. Subscribe to our official YouTube channel, @deinfluencedpodcast, and follow along on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your De-Influenced fix. You can also find us on Instagram and TikTok at @deinfluencedpodcast. Thanks so much for listening and supporting the show! Produced by Dear Media

The following podcast is a dear media production. Hello and welcome back to your favorite podcast. Deinfluenced. Matching. We were matching today. We always match. Can I tell you something that was like very humbling this morning? Yeah.

Okay. I was going to try and guess. Yeah. You won't kiss. So this morning I, well, I didn't sleep great last night because, you know, we had a crazy night. We'll talk about that in a second. We went to a steakhouse at 7 p.m. So, like, that was wild.

But, you know, woke up or I, I set my alarm because I had a Bible study. I had Bible study usually like once or twice a month on Fridays. And the Bible study wasn't until 9 a.m. But, like, getting the kids situated and, like, when you're pregnant and, like, making sure you get your cup of coffee in before you leave, like, getting ready. It's, it's like a big thing. So I stressed all night about getting enough sleep. I woke up at 5 a.m.

And I was like, I can't go back to bed. So I ordered something that I do whenever I'm scared that I'm not going to have enough sleep is I order Starbucks DoorDash. Like I just am like, I want to be prepared for when this happens. Because honestly, I'll probably lay here for another hour. Jordan will still be asleep. So at six, I'll go get my coffee that was delivered. So I did that whole thing. I was like ready for my coffee.

And then I fell back asleep. It was phenomenal. And unfortunately, my aura ring died. So it couldn't tell me like how much I fell back in sleep. I think it was like maybe 20 minutes. I do think I snored during those 20 minutes. So hopefully I did hit hit like the deep sleep. But anyway, I was like really stressed out about this Bible study.

So anyway, I went. It was so cute. It was at this place called Ralph and Rose. Have you heard of it? No. It's a coffee shop like kind of like, what am I saying? Like they just sell like cute trinkets. It's also like a boutique connected to a garden where they also do gardening classes.

for kids. Wow. It is so cute. Like it's so L.A. And I had no idea it existed. And like the coffee I got macho. It was like pretty good. Where's it at? Um, off of 75, like a little bit further north, but before 635. Huh. Interesting. Off of Royal. Yeah, really cute. Highly recommend. Great place to probably take kids. Um, so anyway, we got there in. Let me just tell you. Two of my friends are pregnant right now. Like they're like probably going to like deliver in the next week. And do you, you know how good it feels to be around other pregnant women. Oh, yeah. Like, we were all just, like, rolling around that place, like, waddling everywhere.

Like, we're all crying. Like, we gave each other hugs and, like, we just instantly start crying. It's like we link up, like, in Bluetooth, and we just, like, sink. And we just are so emotional and we're so big and tonky. And, like, we're all so swollen. I'm like, we're sisters. And, but it's so funny. So the craziest part about it is two of them are.

going to like give birth this next week. And I'm like five weeks behind them and I'm like so much bigger than they are. Really? Yeah. We we took a picture of like our bellies. You know, like we were like all like holding each other's bellies and I was like, oh my God. I'm so big compared to y'all.

And I still have like over a month left. Yeah. We really should, there should be innovation and like hospitality for like third trimester females like hotels geared or resorts or farms where we just put you guys all on a farm or insane asylum or insane asylum they're just like that's where we just go no i love when y'all get together though because then you realize you're not alone you're going through it together no it was so sweet i was like i'm never leaving Dallas i love you guys so much like i got back in the car and it's like i have the best friends ever they're so cute they're so hot they love jesus like they're like just

the best people That's so sweet. Yeah, I know. I loved it. And I had to leave early, but then, you know, like, because I had to leave early for this podcast, which, you know, I would have, I would have pushed the podcast back, but I'm getting my hair makeup for my baby shower. Well, you'll see them tonight.

Yeah, I'll see them tonight, too. But, like, I was like, guys, I can only go from, like, 9 to 9.30. So I just want to come and, like, see you guys and, like, you know, just, like, catch up and maybe get some, like, prayer requests, whatever. And, you know, I say, you're like, pray for me. No, because, like, we're all going through, like, a lot. No, for sure. So it's like, but like I stayed till 10.

I know. You could say longer. That's fine. I know. I just, I felt bad. It's like 30 minutes is so hard. Like you can't stop by anywhere for 30 minutes. No.

I don't even know what you were thinking. No, I know. I said 30 minutes because I knew it was going to be 45, which really was going to be an hour. So I told myself 30 because I told myself an hour, I would just would have stayed the whole time. Yeah. Are they still there? Probably. Oh, man.

I'm so bummed for you. I love when you get around your friend. friends because you come back so happy. I know. I love them. You come back so filled up. Your cup is filled. You're like I'm loved. I know, but I think they're just like so cool. Like I love me. Yeah. You know, and then I look at all those girls last night like at Delilah. You know, like wearing all this. And I'm like, gosh, you guys are my people. Thank you for wearing clothes. Oh, oh, your friends are your, yeah. Yeah, because like I was like really not really feeling myself. So I'll tell you what happened last time. Well, I think we've told.

the story that you want we've talked about Delilah this opening well but did you see who performed last night no who performed machine gun Kelly really yeah at what time though 2 a.m well I don't know probably like 11 or 12 yeah yeah we would have never made it so there's we were to talk about this but there's like this new restaurant club that opened in Dallas called Delilah it came from L.A Vegas and Miami and they always have all these celebrities performing it's like one of those places you look on Instagram and you're like, oh, this is where our celebrities hang on. They're like, oh, my God, the girls are so hot. You know, and so they invited me to this like, you know, quote unquote exclusive event.

I was like, babe, we got to go. This was like probably three weeks ago. They were like, hot girls only. Get Danny Austin on the list. And I was like, yes, your main girl is here. Your leader is here. Present. And so, but I was like, it'll be a cute date night, you know.

So we did do the steakhouse. We did have reservations at 730. We did call it like 530 We're like can we come in now I don't know I feel like you're kind of glossing over The most important part of the story This wasn't just like

Oh we got invited to Delilah This was very meaningful for you No it wasn't Danny it was Why? Because I was included Yeah you needed to be included And you needed to feel like I was down

You always think that you know me When you don't Okay Even Jenny said Well y'all both don't know me Okay. All right. The thing was, it wasn't how being invited.

I was like, I know I was going to be invited. I literally, it was so funny, Jenny, when you were filming this hair vitamin launch yesterday, Danny's on stage, shooting a commercial, basically. We'll tell you about that. Jenny walks up to me, and she's like, you think we're going to make a July let or you guys are going to make it July later tonight. And I was like, no shot. And she was like, yeah, she was like, I feel like Danny just like needed to know she's invited. I'd go, look at her up there. And you were so pregnant and like this leotaur.

And I go, gosh, give the girl Delilah invite. She just needs to know she's still got it. No, I, let me think about it. Maybe subconsciously, it is what it was. You'll get there. Usually like two days later. No, honestly, I really, like, I wasn't surprised I was invited. Is that bad?

Not because I'm like a hot girl, but I feel like it's like a big Dallas thing. Yeah, yeah. Like, and they, like, I've lived in Dallas my whole life. I was like, I wasn't shocked. My theory was like, you know, you're in your third trimester. It's not about being invited. It was about going. Like, it was about like being like, yeah, all you Gen Z booty models.

I know you got it, but your mama got it too. She's on our fourth baby. That's what I'm saying. Watch out. Yeah. So it wasn't about being invited. It was about going. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

Yeah, and I didn't go. Oh, I knew we wouldn't. I knew we wouldn't three weeks ago. Okay. Okay, you guys are so annoying. I'm serious. Okay. So, so now continue the story.

Sorry. Okay. So I actually was planning on going because I got my hair and makeup done for a shoot that I was having that morning, which actually just worked out. I wasn't even planning that. And you know what I really think got me, though? Hmm. I think it was that whole Kim Pizzi's pizza that ate by myself at the shoot. Yes, I saw that.

That one really set me back. It was like, I had so much energy and then I was like full. And like when you're full and pregnant, it's hard to want to go places. If there was a betting market like on poly market going of like whether we made it to Delilah or not, you would see it going up as you got your hair and makeup done. Totally. Like chances of yes, the bets would have gone up. When you put on that bedazzled leotard. Oh, it was like, I'm bare.

I'm wearing this to the show. He basically is in Delilah right now. So it's up then. And then the betting market would have crashed. At the minute, not even the first piece, not the second piece. No, it was the whole pizza. It was, you could have made it through half and the betting market would have started to tilt. But I did 75%.

It was when you ate the whole pizza and you sat and you started spreading your legs that the betting markets collapsed. The day was not making it to Delilah that night. That is so true. I know. I know. And it's just like, it's really hard to feel pregnant and full. That is just a recipe for a foot massage or a movie in bed.

Yeah, which, so we audibled. We went to the steakhouse. Yes, we had reservations at 730, which this is a steakhouse in Dallas called Nuri that I was so excited about because, you know, it's also one of those cool places. Because, like, you know, like, I, I'm a homebody. I like to do, like, I like, like, I would say like once a month, like, I got to hit the town. Like I need to know that we still got it And like not only don't want to hit the town Like I want to go to like the coolest of the coolest places

Yep Yeah So I went to Nuri which was like a cool girl place I only know because I have a single friend I asked her I was like oh my god We're both so cool like look at us out of here And the food was phenomenal I have to say it's like probably one of my favorite

Stakehouses I've ever been to Japanese steakhouse You know all these people that you've never seen out on the town I'm out there waddling with my bump out I had a body suit on with like a blazer over it with boots. And so then we were like, okay, let's just like see how we feel, you know. And meanwhile, Jordan's like Googling like foot joy, foot massages. Yeah, yeah, foot spa.

Yeah, yeah, foot spa. And so what really got me was I started looking at all the mentions on Instagram of the girls that were going. And I was like, yeah, I don't feel like talking to you. I don't feel like talking to some of these girls. I think you literally said, I don't want to go to a place where I have to yell tonight. Yeah, that. But I also was just like, and, you know, I'm like a fairly confident person. Like I know that like, like I can hang.

Like, you know, I'm not, I'm not insecure when I'm like around like really pretty girls or everything. I'm like, that's great. Like, good for you. You know, I have a good personality. You're really pretty. Like, it's fine. You know, we'll get along here. God doesn't get with both hands.

Yeah. And I was like, honestly. it might be harder to be pretty, you know? I think it's hard. Maybe it's a blessing. I'm not, you know? Well, you know, I'm like average. It's fine.

We don't do like whether. Anyway, so, anyway, so I was like, I just don't really feel like talking to you guys. All these really pretty people. It was just one of those nights. So, and they were all wearing, like, dressed very sexy. And I was just like, I don't feel like hitting people with my bump and being like, excuse me. And, like, having, like, guys be like, whoa. And, like, I just don't.

It's like I'm the, I'm like the point of pregnancy where like it draws attention, you know? It's not like, oh, she's cute. Like she's pregnant. It's like, wow, like everybody please step aside. Like she could fall and like it could be really dangerous. So I just didn't want to do it. Yeah. And what's crazy about the night is we didn't even make it to the foot massage either.

We did it. We were like leaving the restaurant. I was like, what do you think about moving in bed? Yeah. And so we were in bed by nine, which is the start of our reservation at Delilah. great great restaurant though check out nuri love it delilah will maybe make it in a couple years yeah we'll make it eventually someday but yeah machine gun killy performed which is like pretty epic and you know what you were invited and that's what matters that's what that matters i was supposed

to be there you were supposed to be there i kind of regret not going if i'm being honest which is shocking because i didn't really want to go no i feel like you did kind of though at the end at the end i really was like You were like, baby, let's just stop by. I got those two Diet Coke's in me. And I was like, you know what? I'm ready to roll. Like, you know what? Let's just see what it's.

And I was like, no. And I also think it was like we would have probably like navigated our way through the crowd pretty. It's just funny. It's like what's this pregnant person doing here? I know. It's a little comical. Lately, I've realized something about myself. When my house feels even a little bit chaotic, my brain follows immediately.

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yesterday like all day yesterday I went on on the only a tart babe oh is it out it will be out with this episode

airs oh yes it is sorry sorry sorry time whoa what is

yes we should talk about how yeah I don't even know how to talk about you talk about so

we launched our hair vitamin and I came out with a I came up with this idea right

This is all you. Thank you. I was like, all you. You know, sometimes I'm in this pregnancy fog era where I put the garlic salt in the fridge. All you. And I called me on our team like Jason the other day. Like it was like horrible. Like I'm like people that I like really know.

Like I like can't remember their names. I'm like it. It was really funny when I put the garlic salt in the fridge. Yeah, for sure. We died laughing. Yeah. You were like, where's the garlic fog? You know, I was like, oh, did I put it in the fridge?

Darn it. And I like open the fridge. It's like there. I like didn't actually. think I put it in the fridge, but I did. So, yeah, so we, like, last minute, because Divi has been very, let's see, generous with me, where, you know, I've been pregnant the majority of the time that Divy's been around. And so the team that we've built is very sensitive to that because they never know where Danes at.

You know, it's like, there's no stability with our founder. And it's like, where does she get? It's like moving and grooving. And these poor people are just like, we don't know what to plan because we don't know where she's going to be at. And I'm like, yeah, sorry. This is what happens when you have so many children. So they did, so we never really plan like a vitamin launch.

Right. And it kind of got away from me because mainly because of this pregnancy. And so I was like, you know how I do. I'm like, endth hour, vitamins about to launch. I'm like, we got to put something. together. And I'm like, not only have to put together, it's got to be in the next five days. So our biggest thing about our hair vitamin, which I'm so excited for you guys to try it out, but we've always had four pills. And now we have worked with our team, like our chemists,

our product development team, and we've gotten it down to two pills. Which most people who take neutralful are like, I wish it wasn't four pills. And we were like, can we do it? And we did it. and we did it because people are so annoyed with that. And so we got it down to two pills and we're so excited. So my idea was like four is or two is better than four like cut it in half. And I was like Jordan, we need to have a like a magician come coming in half. So it was kind of like one of your first ideas too. No, literally like we were spitballing ideas and I was like magician cut it in half.

And I was like, okay. Let's put that on the board and you were like no. And I was like, this is it. This is it. This is the one. So called Jenny and my team. I'm like, this is what we're going to do. And, you know, so we start reaching out to magicians in Dallas.

So there's only four guys in Dallas that do this trick. Okay. There's only four guys in Dallas that will cut you in half. Three of them said, she's pregnant. Absolutely not. One of them was our hope. And he was like, he's like, we could maybe make this happen. Okay.

And so we were like, you are like everything to us, Dal. His name was Dow. So, you know, I start measuring myself. I start trying to see exactly how small I get into a ball with my bump. And, you know, it's just not looking great. Yeah. Because I'm like really pregnant. And but this magician, he's like pretty sure.

So then the ice storms hit. And oh, I also call my stylist. I'm like, hey, like, listen, I'm like, think Taylor Swift, think showgirl pregnant. All bedazzled green. Like I want to be a showgirl. Magician needs to look like a magician. and I want this guy to cut me in half. So she's on it.

She's ordering stuff. She's going to vintage shops. But then, like I said, the snow, the ice storms hit. And like it's really, really dangerous to drive in Dallas. Not only that, it's like we can't work on anything because our kids are here. Like we're just like, we're just with our babies all day long, just trying to get by. And so that kind of takes away like literally like three days of our week of planning this shoot. Long story short, the packages.

from Amazon for the costume arrive like on Tuesday. The shoots on Thursday. And, you know, we're like last minute, Dal's like, we take a measurement. We send a video. He's like, it's not going to work. We can't cut her in half. She's too pregnant. And I'm like, Dal, I already got the videographer.

I got the production team. I got the studio. I got the theater. I'm like, Dal, you are a magician. Like, you need to work. Make it work, Dow. Work your magic. Okay.

And so he shows us some other tricks that we could do that are very like, you know, it's kind of like you're being cut in half. It's like. It's not the same. It's not the same. So we decide, you know, last minute, okay, you know what? I won't cut. We won't cut me in half. I'll cut my mother in half.

We were also like there were, there was also a, you know, it's pretty tense time on the internet. And we were like, you know, surely people know, the magic trick, but will they, there be a narrative of like, how dare she? Oh my God, I did not care about that at all. Like, obviously I'm not cutting myself in half. I don't know, man. The internet's super weird.

People, what would the headline be like, internet influencer pretends to cut her body and baby in half? I could see it. To me, that's like, tasteless. But to me, that's like bad good press. Yeah, probably. Because most people would be like, this is crazy. Like, this is so stupid.

like I like bad press when it doesn't have to do with your character. Like it's like when you attack someone's character, that's actually a bad press. But if you're like, influence your pretends to kill herself and half while pregnant, I'm like, that's actually pretty cool. You know, like,

I'm like, I like that. And so anyway, so yeah, we talk to Dow and we decide like that's, that's what we're going to do. Tornado is totally on board, but the only issue is we're shooting on Thursday morning at 11.

She's like, Mark is getting cataract surgery at 10 a.m. on Thursday. We can't move it. So she's like, I'll come, but I'll bring your dad after the surgery. I was like, this is so us. Like, I was like, great. Like, he like walks in with like glasses on. No, like a wrapper on his eyes. Like a cane like can't see. Um, so anyway, last minute. She came. She put him in Uber. He's fine. She put my dad in an Uber. It was. But that's kind of my. But that's kind of my. how our family is like my family's like not like one of those like soft and like warm and like fuzzy families that's like oh my god it's your birthday like where do you want to go to dinner like they're like they're like stop being selfish like we want to go to dinner they're like your birthday is not about you it's about everybody else that's celebrating you okay that's so true like it's like we're not like really soft and fuzzy so it's like yeah you got surgery get an Uber they'll take you home you'll be fine you know figure it out so um so anyway my mom comes and um um

Yeah, it was, it was great. She is officially split in half. So you'll have to go check her out. But no, we successfully filmed and created this illusion for marketing these hair vitamins. And I think it's going to be pretty epic. At this point in this podcast, we haven't seen the final footage. So I hope it all comes together. It will. It always does.

But if you guys are not, or are, you know, wanting to try a new hair vitamin, and I promise you guys the ingredients in this is they're so amazing. Our product development person, I always say, I'm like, she came from Nutraful. She knows what's up. And so we basically taking like the best of like every single formula and putting it into two pills. And I'm very excited for you guys to try it out. We also did like a little giveaway. I don't know if that's still running.

Time is kind of hard for me with this podcast. Yeah, it's because we're. filming it early um so yeah it was a good time um the other thing is like um there was no way you're fin in that box no for sure no shot i mean your mom just barely yeah she barely fit and she was a great sport i mean she laid there for three hours i know it was like so sad because like i forgot she was in there because like we would like be like off like on break and she'd be like um am i allowed to get out yet like and the guys that were filming didn't know that she was crawled up like that.

Did you know that? No. Yeah. So they didn't know that she was like in a really uncomfortable position for a lot of it. Oh, such a bummer. I was, me and Nate were like pretty good about like. Taking care of her. Giving her some straws of water.

Yeah. Like he's like little driplets like just open your mouth. She was so docile in there. Or was she talking about? That's the best way to have her. I, I'm telling you it's like you lock her up in a box and you put her chained up like that's the best way to experience tornado i always say my favorite times hang on my mom is when she's hung over because she is like so easy going like she has just the right

amount of energy but then she's also like kind of docile like you kind of just can like she's like so much more go with the flow it's so funny she just doesn't care she's like id gaff and it's like so much more fun hanging out with an id gaff tornado but y'all are the same person and so is stella I know. It's so funny. I'm more ID GAF than my mom. No, yeah, for sure. But like Stella's like a little tornado too.

Like when she's sick, I'm like, oh my gosh, you're so sweet and like cuddly. I know. It's so funny. Yeah, yeah, shoot, mom was a great sport. Mornings in our house are a lot. There's backpacks, lost shoes, someone suddenly starving, even though they just ate 10 minutes ago and me trying to feel good about what I'm sending my kids out the door with. And honestly, that's where my brain goes. first when everyone talks about the New Year's resolutions, not myself, but my kids.

Because the one thing that actually compounds over time is their health. And here's something I didn't really think about until recently. Our kids, the first generation growing up, surrounded by older processed food, it's everywhere. So instead of trying to be perfect, I've been looking for better, small changes that actually stick. That's actually why Haya exists. Haya graded a kid's vitamin that isn't basically candy. Some children's vitamins out there have up to seven grams of sugar and artificial dyes, which is wild when you think about it. Haya went the complete opposite direction. Zero sugar, no gummy junk, just clean nutrition.

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which gives me so much peace of mind. You get the cute reusable bottle for your first order and then they send eco-friendly refills every month. One less thing to remember at the store. My kids just love decorating the bottles with stickers. Also, if getting your kids eat vegetables feels like an impossible daily battle, high as new kids' daily greens and superfoods is a total game changer. It's basically chocolate milk stuffed with veggies. it's a green powder packed with 55 whole food source ingredients, just mix one scoop with milk

or any non-dairy beverage and watch them actually enjoy it. We've worked out a special deal with Haya for their best-selling children's vitamin, receive 50% off your first order. To claim this deal, you must go to HayaHealth.com slash Jannie Austen. This deal is not available on their regular website. go to h-i-y-a-h-e-a-h-a-l-h-h-com slash janie austin and get your kids the full-body nourishment they need to grow into healthy adults february is always interesting because january comes in hot with big goals and then february shows up like okay so how serious were you really the planners are still around but the energy is quieter and honestly this is usually the moment when people start backing away from the things they said they wanted to do and most of the time it's not because the idea was bad

it's because starting felt easy on paper and harder in real life. Time gets tight, motivation dips. Suddenly, the thing you were excited about in January starts feeling complicated or overwhelming or maybe it can wait another year. This is where I think people get stuck. They confuse friction with failure and building something, a store, a side hustle, a brand, is always going to have friction. The difference is whether you have tools that actually help you move forward instead of giving up when it gets inconvenient.

that's why Shopify matters so much in this phase it's not just about launching it's about continuing shopify makes the operational stuff easier so your idea doesn't die when life gets busy everything lives in one place you don't need to be technical you don't need a full team and you don't need to figure out 10 platforms at once just to see if something works what i like about shopify is that it supports momentum whether you're adjusting products checking orders from your phone or slowly building something alongside real life, it works with you instead of against you. That's huge when February hits and motivation alone isn't enough anymore. So if you're sitting with an idea, you still can't stop thinking about. Maybe this is a sign not to quit on it yet. You don't need

perfect conditions. You just need a system that makes starting and continuing possible. Whether you're just wanting to test an idea out or you're getting serious about launching your own brand, it's never been easier to get started on Shopify.com slash Danny. Shopify, makes selling so easy, you'll wonder how you ever lived without it. All right, quick question for the parents listening. What's one money lesson you wished you learned earlier? I can think about this a lot as our kids start to get older. For all of the parents out there with teenagers, we know you're already trying a million different things under control. Cash app is here to help make sure your teens' money and their spending isn't adding to that craziness. Cash app is designed

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dot app slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures. Tonight I have my dinner, my baby dinner. shower? It's not a baby shower. Why don't why would you call it that? Because it's not. We're celebrating. Oh, a baby shower means the babies are already born. Well, technically, if you really want to know, baby shower is like for your first baby. You like shower the baby with like so many gifts and so much love and all the walk. So then it's like you've been showered. So then it's like, oh, you already had your baby showers. So now you have a baby sprinkles. We just sprinkle you with love. We don't shower you. We don't shower you.

We just like, just make it. I'm not actually making this up as I go. Oh, no, it makes sense. Yeah, now that I think about it, like it kind of does. And so I've already had a baby shower in a baby sprinkles. Yeah. And I was like, I, like, I'm just right now, maybe I'm just looking for a little drizzle. So we should have called it a drizzle dinner.

A baby drizzle. Yeah. And I'm really not looking for, like, I don't need, I don't have a registry. I don't need anything. I don't like, you know. Most people at this point are also like, again, Danny. No, I feel that. Like I feel that like I don't want to annoy people with like I don't need like another event where I'm wearing like pink and blue.

Yeah. You know like everything's like frilly and frilly. I don't really want that. What I really wanted was like moms hit the town. Oh. Yeah. Yeah, you did. Drake's.

Yeah. Private room. I rented a private room at Drake's and all the moms are like, what are we wearing? I'm like, you're sexy a selfie guy. I was like, this is about being moms. You're like, I missed Delilah last night. I'm ready to go. No, that was a big reason why I also skipped Delilah.

I was like, my night is tomorrow night, you know, with my girls. So, like, this is going to be like the most lit baby drizzle you've ever seen. Is there music? I'm just kidding. It's not, it's like a private dinner. But here's the thing is 42 people. 32. 32?

Are you sure? You said 42 last night. Yeah, the number is. are off. Oh, 32 is still a lot. I know. I'm surprised I have that many friends. I know. And I had more that I couldn't invite. We didn't fit. Wow. I know. The venue like fit 30 and I was like we're squeezing two in. Wow. Yeah. I didn't uh. I need to stop being so social. Yeah. Or just being so awesome. You know, you know who the funniest friends that we have are is the friends that will go to one dinner with them.

And then we're like best friends. No. And then we never see them ever again. We have a lot of people like that. You do that to a lot of people. You also give your phone number to a lot of people that you like meet at the mall. Because here's my thing. And then they're like, oh my gosh.

Like I'm about to start a new friendship. And I'm like in my mind, I'm like, you'll never hear from her again. But here's actually not. That's actually not true. Because actually that is true. Like I'll never reach out to you again. And it's not because I don't like you. Like I reach out to you because I want to be friends.

But to me, it's in the ball's in your court. So like if you want to make it happen, you can make it happen. But like, I'm not going to ask you two times in. We actually had one of those friends that we did something with. And they came up to us at a party. And they go, hey. Yeah, yeah. She goes, hey, do you remember how like we went to a WMBA game together and then we never talked to again?

We had like the best night of our lives. And it's just so. I was like, Brenna, it's not like it's like I loved you guys. I invited you, but like, now, like, you got to make the, the next move. The next move. I'm very weird about stuff like that. Not because I, um, like, care. It's just like I, um, like, it's not like, it's like an etiquette thing or like, like, I'm just like, I don't want to annoy you. Like, you know what I mean? I'm, I'm like, I get weird. I get insecure. I get insecure with people. But see, I, like, I can't invite you twice. Yeah. Like, what if they didn't like us that first time and

then we invite them again? We just have totally, but don't you think that they could be perceiving it as like mixed signals? No, for sure. No. Okay. I'm just glad that you're saying for sure because there's several couples that I feel like we've gone to one dinner with. And I'm like, they probably think that we didn't like them. But it is not like that at all.

The hard thing about me too is like I'm not really like a hangout girl. Like I'm like an event girl. Like not an event girl, but like, you know, Friday we'll go see each other. Or like, it's not like. If you're there, you're fully there. Oh, yeah. When you're not there, gone. Gone.

So I really. Out of sight, out of mind. Yeah. The only person that I like call consistently is probably like Ellie. Yeah. Like she's like someone that I would just call right now and like talk to. But I don't really feel comfortable doing that with like a lot of people. And it has nothing to do with them.

It's just my own insecurity. I think I'm insecure that I'm bothering them. Interesting. I would have never guessed that. Yeah. Like if I'm like, hey, what's you doing? And they're like, ugh. Let's go.

That's kind of what I picture. another line is like they're like, Danny's calling me. But what if they're actually saying like, why doesn't Danny ever call me? Well, then why don't you call me? The more you call me, then I'll call you more too.

Your phone's going to start blowing up. No, it's great. I love it. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I just, you know, there was another couple we went to Casa Brasa with. I love them.

I DM her all the time. Oh, you DM her. Yeah, we need to figure something out. It's also like a hard. It's almost like a system problem because like I feel like we just have different styles.

Like I would never like if I start a new friendship I'm like going to go all in like I'm gonna do it. Oh see I kind of cast a wide net. You cast a really wide net. I'm like who wants to swim back to mommy? You know, I'll just throw the fish food out and be like I gave you a chance like who wants this? It makes it really difficult.

Like I always genuinely love hanging out with these new husbands that you introduce me to. But in the back of my mind I'm like I'm never going to see you again. Well, why don't you get their number and plan something? Because it's like, you know, I don't cast a wide net. I've got like, I've got my little small net. But I helped you. I basically gave you the bait. I gave you the fish.

So you don't like the fish? Well, then that's your problem. I don't want a lot of fish. I just want, I'll eat the same thing every day. You know what I'm saying? Because I just think it's like, you know, for me, my, my sort of perspective on friendships is like there's so little time. yeah you know we have four kids so you don't think you have 32 friends no babe i could not fill a room with 32 people i mean i would have to go real far into that acquaintance bucket yeah yeah

you know no these are like 32 people that i like actually really like no i remember i was like what buckets did you pull from no these are just my friends i actually had to leave out some people it was hard oh man hard i don't know see then but when you have a baby drizzle with 32 people, it makes me wonder, like, am I doing, am I doing life wrong? I don't know. I think I have a lot of, like, really good. My thing is, I think you need five good friends in life. I think I have five people I could call. Yeah. I think five to seven is like the number. And then everybody else is just like a bonus. Yeah. I also, I wonder if it's different for girls and guys. Like, I feel like if I was like to most dads, I was like, man, doesn't it feel like sometimes our

friendships are just like checking in on the group chat every once in a while. I think most men that are dads would be like yeah, totally. Yeah, you got to have that person in the group chat that's like going to take it off line. It's like that one leader that's like, all right, guys, like let's get together on Friday. But I still think that the dads that I think it's rare for a dad for the dads to be like, yeah, like let's try and do this this weekend, this weekend. It's like once every four months. Yeah, I don't know how healthy that is. But it feels like yesterday. I don't know.

I don't know how healthy it is either. I feel like the church is heralding this idea of community. Oh, don't blame the church on this. No, I'm not blaming the church. I'm just saying the church is heralding this idea of community. And I'm like, okay, what does that need to look like when you have four young children? I don't know. But you're making me feel guilty.

Like, I'm not in community. And I'm like kind of happy. Yeah. I don't know no I'm not I'm talking to the church I'm talking to God or I don't know not God the church the evangelical body okay you know sounds like you have some church hurt no no I don't have church hurt I'm just genuinely like most of the guys that are like yeah like you got to live in community they're not married or just newly married and they don't have kids and I don't feel like there's been a good precedent set out there by the church of like what community in fatherhood looks like

Well, I don't know the answer to that, but I do know from, we have a group called Kingdom Mamas. Yeah. And there's like seven of us. And we have Kingdom Pappas for the husband. Oh, really? Good for you. And I just know for us, like the only way we get together is if it's in the morning. Like we had to do like Friday morning at 9.

Yeah. So it was like, everybody dropped their kids off at school. And then we went to like a coffee shop and we were going to stay there until 11. But I was like, guys, Friday's a podcast. So. Yeah. But yeah, and we usually try to meet like twice a month. It's not like every Friday.

That's really hard. And then we always like keep the group chat going. The wellness wheel is hard is what I'm saying. You got you got your faith. You got your workouts. You got your family. You got kids. You got your wife.

You got your friends. And I'm not going to lie. Friends, they fall in my priorities. My thing is is like. But here's the craziest thing. Okay. the people that live the longest have the best friendships. Oh, see, I always thought it's about flossing.

They always said if you floss. No, it's friendships. It's the quality of your relationships is directly correlated with the longevity of your life. I'd like to see the data points on this. Like, what studies are we talking about? They do it in the blue zones where people live past 100. I see it. I mean, it can't hurt.

It can't hurt. Can't hurt to have some friends. But I've been pretty vocal about this. I don't want to live. live, like, I'm not dying to live to like 120. Well, no, but please don't leave me. No, no, I'll, I'll, I'll try and outlast you. I think you probably will.

I'm a feeling. I'll try and outlast you for sure. But, yeah, I mean, I'll probably die of sadness shortly after. Oh, God. Should you tell them what happened the other night? Yeah, Danny was mad at me again. And mad because she, because like, she like literally, every night I go to sleep to your back on your phone. And then like, I'm on my phone in bed.

And you're like, why aren't she? I don't understand. Why are you talking to me? Jordan, that's not what happened. We were watching a show and it was like a war movie. And I was like, what's happening? Oh, that's so true. Oh, my gosh.

When I ask him, I'm like, wait, what just happened? Like, I was like, are they invading France or like, where is France in relation to Britain? No, that's not what you're asking. We're watching a movie for the first time together. Let's just say. Was it Argo? No, it was Dunkirk. Dunkirk.

We've watched it together, but yeah. And this guy's flying a plane fighting the Germans. And she's like, Jordan, what's going to happen? Jordan, like, is he going to. Where's he going to land? Is he going to land on the beach? And I'm just ignoring her because I'm like, I'll give her 10 seconds and she'll figure it out. And then you're like, why do you hate me?

Why are you not listening to me? And I literally like kind of chirped back. And I was like, I don't know either. I'm like, I don't have your answers. You ignored me all day. And like I was like, I've asked you questions and like you don't, you act like I don't exist. Like I'm like speaking into the dark void. And then, well, most of it's like, where's the.

garlic salt and I'm like I don't know you probably put it in the refrigerator like so anyway this guy's flying and then the scene changes and it's when Harry styles and that other character climb into this abandoned boat and then five seconds later the boat was named like moonshine or something like really cool and then she goes if there was a boat what would you name it and I go Danny girl and then she started crying and said that's the sweetest thing I was like I was like That's so sweet. I love you so much. And Jordan's like, you hated me five seconds ago.

Oh, I've just been riding the waves. That was funny, though. I really would name the boat Danny Girl. It's such a cute name. It's a great name. Danny Girl. It's like really. It's so cute.

It's just like my name is okay before we put a girl behind it. Danny Girl. I was like, oh my gosh. I love them. I love him. But we've been doing good. We've been doing good. Yeah, we've been doing great.

You did lay out some pretty strict requirements for a. Well, I talked to my reproductive psychiatrist. And so I talked to her like every three months just to check in. And I actually found. She's like, yep, you're depressed. No. No, I actually found her because I. I usually have the worst postpartum's.

So after my second, I like got on her wait list. It takes like eight months, whatever. Finally got on there. Had the had summit. And I was just like I would, whenever you like are paired with these people, these doctors, sorry. I don't know what I'm saying. You start seeing them three weeks postpartum and then you check in with them like every week.

And you just do like a Zoom call. She's based out of Austin. And I had like such a good postpartum. that every time she'd recheck and I'd be like, I'd be like, I promise this isn't normal. Like usually I'm so depressed right now, but I'm like so happy. Like, and she's like, okay. And I'm like, I'm not trying to waste your time, I promise. But usually this is what this is where I'm at.

And I'm like, but I'm actually really happy. And everything's. Yeah. Yeah. So I, like every time postpartum I ever checked in with her, like everything was great. But then when I got pregnant, then like four months later, you know, I got like, I show up and I'm like, I'm pregnant again. And I'm depressed.

And I'm depressed. So then we upped like one of my medications and it like helped everything. And then, um, so yeah, we're kind of like getting into like that phase again where it's like we're like, we're like, uh, bracing for impact. And she was like giving me some advice of like how to like get ready for postpartum that I kind of just like forgot about. And she was like, have you made a plan with your husband? Like what is his paternity like paternity? a attorney take what do you call it? paternity leave.

Paternity leave going to look like like what are the roles around the house going to look like and I was like I don't know. It's like good question. You're like I don't know. I'm just going to get mad at him until he meets my expectations that I don't tell him. Yeah. So then I like really thought it out with her and then I told Jordan kind of like not what the expectations were but like you know the topics we need to cover.

Yeah. Which was first of all having a fraternity leave. Yeah. because Jordan's kind of like in this like, like working mode. You always are. I don't know what I'm saying. Like, but he's like working like a lot. Like like work.

And so I could see how like he, because Jordan's very like he'll find a rhythm and he'll just like stick to it. Even though even though like the ice storm is going on and life is chaos, he's like, I'm going to the gym. I'm like, babe, the roads are shut down. He's like, I'm going to the gym because that's what I do. I'm like, you can't go. because you can get hit by a truck.

It's not safe. He's like, I'll see you later. Danny's like, it's daylight savings. How interesting is this? It's dark and six. I love it. I love the chaos.

So he's just kind of... Literally at the ice storm, you were like, this is going to be so fun. I wonder what's going to happen. Yeah, I like it. It's so different. I love it.

Yeah. I don't, yeah, I don't, routine is great, but it kind of gets old. So, anyway, so,

what was I talking? You were saying that I don't ever change. So even like a baby could enter our lives. And Jordan would still be like, I'm going to eat steak and eggs and then go to the gym. And I'm going to be like, it's true. It's true. And it's just like, and it's not, he's not trying to be selfish. He's just like, I'm doing what I'm going to do because that's what I always do.

And for me, I'm like, yeah, you can't really do that anymore. I'm like, yeah, you can't. Like, and he'll, like, and he'll set up processes and systems to make it like where it's not like, taking away, like, hurting me. But, like, I think what hurts me is when it's, like, not him doing it. Yes. So he'll be like, I'll call my mom and she'll make breakfast and, like, watch over you while I go to the gym.

So you're taking care of it. I'm like, no, what I wanted was for you to make me breakfast. Yeah. And so, like, I wanted us to be a family. I don't want, like, outside help. But he was just like, he's just very logical. He's like, well, if I can't be there to do the, blah, then I'll find somebody. else to do da-d-d-d-d-da-da-da. And then I'm like, no, but the whole point was for us to do

together. Yes, that's, that was a big epiphany moment for me, because I never understood. I was like, I'm not being selfish. Like I, I'm trying to do what I feel like I need to do and then make sure that you and everyone else is taking care of in the process too. But it never really works. I don't mind suffering, but I want to suffer together, you know, because it makes it stronger. Yeah, you, the thing that I've learned most probably in our marriage is that it's not about what needs to get done. It's about doing it together for you. Totally. Because that's that's the quality time.

Yes. So the most sacrificial thing that I can do is not work through a paternity leave. It's to take a paternity leave. So yeah, I mean, I understand paternity leave. Yeah, so we just, I'm glad we talked about that. But we did agree like I could like, because, you know, part of why I stick to a routine is I go a little crazy if I'm bored. It's not good for me to be bored. So I'm going to pick up some hobbies.

I might watch Homeland again. Totally. It's got eight seasons. I could probably power through that. Yeah, I mean, you just still work out. Like, we have a gym in our garage. Yeah, no, for sure. I'll still work out.

I mean, it's jinky a.F. But like, I'll go on walks. Like, I'll. you know, listen to, I got to continue my early Christian history. I'm a little bit behind, so I'll catch up on that. So yeah, I mean, I might, I might download a new video game. Babe, you know I love when you play video games. You really do.

I love it. It's the weirdest thing. No, I'm like, please, like, sometimes I'm like, can you go play a video game? Yeah, yeah. Like, it's just like I, I like for Jordan to enjoy himself. Because he's not, he's not one of those people that, like, obsesses over video games. Like he'll play like for two days every five months. I'll go on like spurts of two or three weeks.

And then I don't go off. You never have played a video game two or three weeks. No, you haven't. Yeah, I did during our private equity deal. So I was going crazy. Yeah, whatever. I didn't care about that. Yeah, yeah.

I was like, you get that money, baby. You go play that video game. Well, I just like that, it was a tense negotiation. I had to blow off some steam. Yeah. It was really. I think because I had a. In my life, I was probably a Twitch streamer.

I'm not going to lie. I'm very good. No, like, I'd, so like something about me was like, I'm kind of cool because like I grew up with a brother that like was a gamer pretty much. Yeah. And I always thought it was cool. Like I never thought it was like a weird, like lazy thing. But maybe because I've never had somebody that's like, waste their life on it.

Like prioritizes that over life. I, I, per capita it's probably not a great thing. Yeah. Yeah. For men over 16. Yeah. 18. But for me, like, when you playing a video game, I don't really like the ones that you played. But if you're playing Mario, I can watch. The problem is that like, we're not talking like Mario Kart anymore. We're talking like they optimize these games to keep you engaged for hours. You could play four hours and be like, that felt like 20 minutes. That's crazy. Because like, I know my brother used to play World of Warcraft. That was all. Yeah, that's no good. That's a bad one. Oh, is it? Babies died from neglect in China because their parents neglected them to World War II. See, but that one I could never watch.

It wasn't entertaining. So I liked when it was like N64 days with like like Zelda, Super Mario, or even like just Sega days with like Mortal Kombat. Like those are the games that I would just sit there for like hours and like watch my brother like play it. I thought it was so fun. Yeah. I mean, and the social component, it's like you're playing with your friends that you like never see. Like it's so fun. What do you think like the, what do you think about like kids in gaming?

Like when do it's like we always talk about social media, but like what do we think about gaming with kids? Like when do our kids start playing video games? Like probably like six or seven. What? Are you serious? Probably. No. No.

Seven or eight. Well, now they play blocks or something. What's it called? Roblox. I don't even know what that is. Yeah, I actually don't know what it is either. But like I think there's a lot of predators on there allegedly. Oh.

But, no, I'll play video games with my three sons for sure. We're going to bond so hard over that. Six or seven seems like so young. Yeah, we'll play like easy games like like Mario Kart and stuff. Like should we get an M64? No, not yet. Not yet. No, but like when we do.

Yeah. I would play with them. We're not going to be playing like Call of Duty when Stratton's like six. But when he's 13, hell yeah. I used to love some videos. We're going to drop in together. war zone. Being the boys.

My thing is. And honestly when they're in college, like I'll probably be at home, empty nester with you and playing with them when they're in college. If they want to be gamers, I'll be like, all right, then you guys got to practice five hours a day. They're like, okay, mom. Yeah, they're like, no. I like bring them snacks.

I honestly think like, I mean, video games for me, it really held me back from a lot. Really? Yeah, I mean, because you just spend so much time doing it. your room stink. There was one time my friend, I'll never forget this, my friend Chase. And the funny is you've literally no B.O. Like Jordan is no sticky person.

He's never sunk a day in my life. I'll never forget this. My friend Chase came over and like I heard him at the door and I was like, I'm not answering the door because all I wanted to do is play video games. Like pretend I'm not here. And Chase was that friend who was always like come outside and play. And like he came like my mom let him in. And so I heard him come in the door.

So I pretended like I was asleep, but I left the Xbox on. And he walked over the bed and he saw the Xbox on. And he goes, I know you're not asleep. Let's get outside. And it was like, the worst day of your life. It's the worst day of my life. But yeah, you got to be careful with them. Video games.

Yeah. I think you, I think putting your kids in a lot of sports helps. Yeah. Or activities. Yeah. Even it's like piano lessons. Me and Stratton have been really dominating these Legos lately. I love that hobby. It's so cute. My brother was obsessed with Legos growing up. He had a whole, like on his whole dresser, like a really long dresser had like 50 arrangements.

Yeah. It's so great. It's like so weird. It's like it's like the first it's the first hobby that like I feel like Stratton and I have found that feels like it's like we're both having fun. Because usually like we're putting together like a, you know, giant puzzle. Oh, I say I love puzzling with him. really yeah it's like my thing yeah it's just not we have a lot of fun doing that um and i like to teach i like to do the the um workbooks the workbooks with them but that's not like that's like more i'm like i'm proud of you for like being smarter the legoes is like man we're like enjoying this together yeah i built a couple legos in my lifetime it just wasn't for me that's okay it's like yeah those little pieces with my nails and they're flying everywhere and Yeah, I like the chunky Legos better.

The blocks. Yeah. Yeah. So good, good time. Okay. Well, let's see. Do you want to talk about the story post that I made about feeling pressure to speak out on the internet about ice situation? Yes.

Yes. Yes. I totally forgot about this. Oh my gosh. We've had two really, that happened that was really interesting. And then we had a really kind of like philosophical discussion last night at Nuri. I don't remember what we talked about. We talked about navigating life being ugly or hot.

Yeah, that's always a fun conversation. Just like the differences in like the way that the world opens up to you if you're like hot. And just the lifestyle of it all. Yeah. But let's go back to the more serious. Yeah. Yeah. Let's talk about your position on speaking out against ICE.

Should I read what I post just in case people in the podcast didn't? Yeah, read it. Double down. I mean, I'm not trying to double down. They just honestly might have like totally missed it. Okay. I said, I've learned a lot after being online for 13 years. You are not a morally superior person because of the posts you share this week.

You are allowed to take time to process and pray. Even after all that, you don't have to say anything online if you don't want to. You're allowed to feel compassion for what's going on in the world, but log off and focus on being the mom, friend, and wife in person you're called to be. Whatever that means to you. People do not want your opinion. They want affirmation that you agree with them or they want someone to target. for the fear and anger they feel inside.

They are scared and you are the easiest one to blame. It makes them feel special or superior to, quote-unquote, call you out, but it's not productive. In fact, it's manipulative. Conversations and commentary are so much healthier when not set in the heat of the moment, but after prayer, processing, and conviction. That timeline is up to you and God. I've been hurting over the state of our country for the past three or four days as well,

but I refuse to play the game and virtue signal so people think I'm a quote-unquote good person. It feels fake, unproductive, and performative. As a mom, arguing with other accounts in the comment section or DMs, feels irresponsible with my attention and time. I have three little ones to show up for to raise to be courageous, bold, and faithful humans. That's my primary focus, not reading and replying to the countless of hateful strangers in my DMs. To any other moms out there, you're doing so great sticking to your mission of raising faithful children. So proud of you and keep fighting. I wasn't really speaking out against.

No, no, you were speaking out against being forced to speak out. I think anyone in their right mind knows that, like, I don't care how things went down. Like, I watched the video and it's horrible what happened to Alex. Like, whether you are instigating it or not. It's just a horrible. Like, I don't think, I think that we're all on the same team about that. And people are trying to be like, like, you're on this team. He's like, no, that was horrible.

There's no sides to the situation. It was a crappy situation. It was horrible. And so, and then also everything that was happening in Nashville, like, I was really, really worried about everybody in Nashville, like, with all the trees falling on, like, Landon's house and the power and all these people, like, and then, like, Jen Houghton's house caught on fire. Like, there's all these, like, whole crazy things going on. Yeah. And I, at the same time, my kids, like, it's an ice storm. And so we are at home and I'm like, I'm about to lose my freaking marvels because.

like these kids are driving me freaking nuts. So I kind of like take a, whenever that happens, you kind of take a step away from social media in general because you're just like, I have to take care of like the thing that like God literally gave me in my own home first and figure this out. And then also like neighbors and friends and family that are going through like horrible things because this ice storm

and figuring out how like they're going to get their medications or whatever. And so then, you know a couple days into it I get on my phone and I see all these DMs and they're like I can't believe you're not speaking out about this this is I'm like I literally actually don't know what you are talking about like I my favorite what?

So we really were kind of oblivious to what was going on. I go babe do you know what happened? You know we were blasting the weather channel? We were giving them so many ratings. We had that thing blaring 24-7. That's all we were watching was the weather channel. And then I get on my DMs and people are like, I can't believe you unfollowing. You're disgusting. I hate you. Like you're not speaking out

about this, this and this. And there were so many different topics to be speaking out against. And I was like, guys, like, I haven't been on my phone. Like, I literally don't know what's going on. And it, it, like, really upset me because I was like, I feel now pressured to say something that I don't know anything about. And now I have to do it on their timeline in the time and like say what they want, the way that they want. And I'm scared. I'm going to say it wrong. And I don't even know, like, what's going on. And also, like, I have come to like, realize. that I'm not going to just watch one video and then trust everything that they say. You learned that one on the Israel-Palestine thing.

Never forget it. We were flying home from Nashville. Danny starts getting pressure. This was like four years ago, not the big one, the one before that. And Danny was like, why aren't she speaking out on Israel versus Palestine? So then Danny spent three hours on the way home from Nashville being like, I'm going to digest centuries worth of history to understand who is. right and who is wrong. And I'm like looking up scripture. And this vastly complicated geopolitical

event. And then she made a statement. And I was like, Danny, I was like, you shouldn't do this. And then she made a statement. And then she started with the love like, thank you for speaking of these. And then it was like the other side came at her. And they were like, bo, bo, bo, and then she was like, I immediately regret this. I was like, I literally don't know what I'm talking about. I'm trying to understand. And it was such a good effort. But everyone's like, so then it's like, you don't say anything and they're like, wow, that's such a privilege that you don't have to say anything. And I'm like, well, I'm really just trying to keep my children alive like in like if that's privilege, that's privilege. I'm sorry. I don't, I'm just really trying to like focus on what

I have to do right here right now. And I will catch up and I will take some time and try to understand. But right now, if that's, if that's what you want to call privilege, that is what is happening. Here's the thing about everything. The thing about everything is I, I, I really do believe in like personal conviction. And if you feel like you have a heart to say something about something, like I have felt that before. But like I can't understand everything. Like I don't and I will like I try to.

Like I try to read. I try to understand. But in that timeline that everybody wants, I can't. So I really support like everybody's like conviction to share what they want to share and like whether it's I agree with it or not. Like you go for it, girlfriend. But it's when they come at me and want me to share what they want. within their timeline, I'm like, I, I just, I think this time around, it had nothing to do with

what was going on. I was just like, I can't play this game. Like, I'm not going to, it feels so fake right now for me to just try to like watch 10 or 15 other influencers and basically summarize what they're saying and then just post it on my stories to like make everybody happy to everybody thinks I'm a good person. When like I know that what happened to Alex, like it broke my heart. It is really sad. What happens to a lot of people, like all the time, it is really sad. But I don't think that, like, posting something is going to make me morally superior than you because you posted that and I didn't post anything that way. That means that you're a better person than me. I just don't think that that's how, like, social media is. It's not, in fact, I feel like it's actually almost like a

cop out to, like post stuff on social media and to like be like, well, I posted this and you didn't post anything. So like I took care of it and like I'm done and you're not like you still have your work to do. When I actually think it takes more courage to like have conversations in like real life or to like bring it up at your church or with your friends or talk about at the dinner table with your kids. Like I think that takes more courage than just like reposting a post that that everybody else is sharing. I'm just like so I'm so over their virtue signaling like it's so fake for so many people and like you can tell that so many people are being pressured to say stuff that they really don't know what they're talking about.

They're just outraged because they're scared and everybody else is outraged. So they just post stuff to cover their butts and it's like so obvious. And I don't, I don't want to play that game anymore. I'm like I'm not playing it. Like I'm sorry. And like I said, there will be things that I feel convicted of that I feel like I understand in the moment and I can speak to it quicker. But there are some things that I don't understand that I'm just not going to speak about

until I feel confident that I feel convicted about sharing something. Like, you know what I mean? We're all like different. We all have like different convictions, perceptions, like understandings of things. And it's like we don't all have to act, react the same. I want to meet the person in your audience that saw what was going down in Minneapolis and genuinely, 100% authentically woke up and said, I want to know what Danny Austin thinks. No, I know. You're smart.

I love you. Like you're very well read. But like who in their right mind is going to. and being like, I really, really need my favorite influencer. Well, can I tell you what they would say to that? This is what I get all the time. Danny, you are, you have this massive following, which is a huge responsibility. And you need to be using your platform for good.

And I'm really disappointed that you haven't said anything. That one's hard. Therefore, I am unfollowing you. I think that that's, first of all, like those GMs don't get me at all anymore because I'm like, honey, I'm human just like you are. Like, I started posting videos in my dorm room when I was 13 years old. That doesn't make me any superior than you. Like, I'm learning the same way that you're learning. Like, I don't know why you expect me to have some really quick revelation about something. How are we different at all? Like, we're both influential in our own ways. In fact, like,

the way that you truly influence people typically is like one-on-one conversation, like in a community, like when you're face to face with them. Like, like, especially on hard topics. Now, if it's like a product or something, like whatever. But, but, like, that's how it actually works. So we really have like the same responsibility in my, in my opinion, because I'm not, my brain actually, your brain probably works faster than mine, to be honest. I'm, I don't understand. Like, when you click into the profiles, sometimes those are like real people. Like, they have posts, they have pictures. But then there's sometimes that are just like burner accounts that are sending these like really antagonistic like you need to speak out and they're

not just doing it to you they're doing it at mass scale and you can tell we're in the industry we know the influences that influencers that are speaking out out of true conviction and the ones that are like dude i know you know nothing about what's going on in the thing is people are angry and they're hurt and they like don't know where to target that energy and i feel that like i've felt that way before it's like when you take your anger on like your spouse it's the same exact thing where it's like you take your anger out on people that you love the most because you don't know where else to harness it. And it's like you feel so helpless like behind a screen that all you can really think to do in the moment is have these people with big platforms and these people that you

follow agree with you. Because that's going to make you feel so much better for the anger and feeling that you have. And when they don't agree with you and they don't post anything, you feel so alone in your fear. Like I understand I feel like the psychology behind it. And I think that's why I also don't want to fall for it anymore because I'm like, I know that me saying something isn't about that. It's about you. Like, I know that that's what it's really about. And so, yeah, I don't, I don't know how to help people, like, harness that energy for something that's actually more productive. Because I do not think that anything I would post would actually change anyone's mind. I think you come to me to see if I validated what you felt already. You're not

coming to me to see what my opinion is. And if I disagreed with your opinion, then that gives you the validation to unfollow me. And it feels so good to like, DM me and be like, I am unfollowing you because you do not feel what I'm feeling right now. And like, you don't agree with my anger and you're not frustrated like I am. And so like, I want to unfollow you and like that's justice. Like I'm doing good work now because I'm unfollowing Danny. Like that's going to really move the needle. And I'm like, I can't, I can't help you in this moment. Like I, I, not only that, but it's like these conversations that we're having through DMs are like so unproductive. Like they're not helpful. They're taking away from like what I've always seen is like if you

truly want to make a difference, like raise good kids that are going to like make a difference. Like, and I'm like this energy and this time that I'm spending on worrying about DMs and people being mean or trying to like harass me or say this. say that like I'm like I have three children plus I'm pregnant like if I want to make some actual moves it's going to be like pouring into my children like what I have in front of me then getting behind my DMs and spending hours arguing with people yeah I mean it just the only thing that you're going to leave with you're going to feel after three or four hours of argue you're just going to feel angrier like well no what's going to happen is that

by next week they'll all this will die down and then it's like my thing It's like memory hold. Like, oh, I can't believe I sent that DM. Because in the moment, you're acting off of so much emotion. But then when the- I don't know, I think they still, I think that people use this as a strategy, like long-term. Like, I think it's a long-term strategy to deal with your emotions. And I know that these people feel very, like, passionately about what they are speaking about.

And honestly, a lot of times, I probably agree with them. That's what's so funny. Like, I didn't even say what I felt about the situation because I was so bothered that I was being bullied to say something that I was like, I'm just not doing it. But a lot of people that are arguing with me, like, I actually kind of agree with you. Like I, I see both sides. Like I'm like, you know what I mean? And so it is crazy. I'm like, you don't even know how I feel, but I feel like you're not even giving me the opportunity to process and understand what I feel. So I'm therefore, I'm just not going to give you any of it because it's like, it's just manipulate. It's emotional

manipulation. It's like the way that you are coming at me and trying to like force us to say something. within your timeline is so manipulative. Like it's not healthy for anyone. Plus anything said in the heat of the moment, even whenever you're like arguing with their spouse, never is healthy. Never. Right.

And like sometimes you take like a like the Israel, Palestinian conflict. Like I tried to like, I was like, oh my God, I got to say something right now. Like a little. So let me go digest for three hours and try to understand, you know, centuries of, of history like within three hours so I can have an opinion. But then you learn more.

more and more. In three weeks, you might feel a little differently. Like, you did, you really, you put in the effort, though, on that one. I watched it happen. I could put in the effort for anything, but like, also, I just want people to understand. People on the right, you are seeing the worst version of the people on the left. People on the left, you are seeing the most, like, disgusting version of people on the right. We are both seeing extreme versions of each other. It's, it's, it's, It's not all like that. It's not like people are, it's like there is a middle. Like there is a way to see both sides and to be civil about things.

But that's, that's boring. And that's not going to get any clicks. And that's not going to get any views. So the left is going to show you the most crazy versions of the right. And the right's going to show you the most crazy, like hysterical versions of the left. And then let's just all fight about it. And I'm like, I'm not doing it. Like I'm not doing it.

Honestly, if you want to double up on your New Year's resolution, I go to Planet Fitness and they have CNN on the right screen and then Fox News on the left screen and then they have ESPN in the middle. And I find that the truth is kind of like, this is what the right saying, this is what the left saying. It's probably like a blend in the middle. Yeah, totally. And I'm so sick of everybody putting labels on all of us. Like, oh, she's this or she's that or she's a lib and she's a MAGA. I don't even know what those things mean these days. I just want to take a Tylenol. I do take Tylenol.

I know. I take Tylenol. Because you're, because I'm in the middle. Well, sorry. I forgot how Tylenol was loved. It was banned by the right. So then you took it and then you were a lib.

Yeah. I forgot. Technically because I take. Okay, here's what people say. I'm going to make a statement. Hi. My name is Danny Austin and I'm pregnant and I take Tylenol. Everyone now, all the libs are like,

yes. She's a. She's a fighter. She's a revolutionary. Stand up against the Gestapo. But then I also make a video. I'm like, hi, my name's Danny Austin. I've heard that Tylenol might not be good for you while you're pregnant, especially in mass amounts. She's a Republican. She loves Trump. She's a mega girl. It's just like, so you take these one things. And I'm like, no, realistically, like I learned that Tylenol might be bad for you. So I just try to take less. But I've taken it all my pregnancies. So I've taken it all my pregnancies. like when I'm really dying, like I had the COVID, I took some time. Yeah, you really can't. If you're, if you're stuck in this like right versus left, you're kind of like, you're kind of just wrong on all fronts because you're being manipulated

mostly by the media. That was another thing that I think, okay, so I think this was like the one that like really set me off was when I returned to social media, I was tagged in a post. and it was some other person, some other influencing, tagging all the people that haven't spoken up, like calling them out. That's crazy. And I knew like this person. And they're like calling like, it's just like so insane. You know what I think the actual privileges and I'm being real about this because I do think that we have privilege. Yeah, of course.

But here's what I think the actual privileges is. like if you're an influencer and you felt pressure to speak out and you spoke out, like, I don't really blame you because like I understand the fear and like so much of your like economic means are tied to your reputation. So like we realized that most in 2020 and I feel like we worked really hard to like not have to depend on. That's why we got a bunch of rental properties. That's exactly what we did.

We're like, let's take all of our money and put it into rental properties. And we like, we like literally like mapped out like exactly what our expenses were each month and made sure that the rent would cover our expenses. Yeah. So but I do think I don't want to have to play this game forever. So, um, I think that that's the actual privilege that we have is I think that what's unfortunate. And I think it's getting lesser so. But like especially in like 2020, it's a privilege to be able to like exercise your right to free speech, free opinion. And I think that like even us being able to. And I think that like even us being able to. to not have to speak out right or left and say like what you said is a privilege because most people who are influencers listening to this are like man i yeah like if i'm being honest of myself i didn't want to say anything but i felt like i had to say something we're privileged as influencers to other influencers what about just like to normal people i think that they feel the same i think that they feel the same to like speak out yeah i do i think that they i think when the pressure campaign

starts, I think that, you know, everyone feels pressured to take one side and they don't have the freedom to actually process and be like, I don't agree with this point. I don't think that they do. I don't know, but I feel like if we did it, why wouldn't they? Because they're looking to influencers. Like, think about it if you're just like not a social media influencer. You're opening up, you follow maybe a couple influencers here and there and then you see all your friends, well, your friends, like all these social media influencers, it's like celebrities and celebrities used to speak out about politics. If you're not educated, you're like, whoa, they are the voice of truth because they have this huge platform.

Now people don't trust celebrities at all. I'm really hoping. But this is, this is the, what I'm saying is like, I think it's a privilege to take your own stance on things because what happens is I think that, and I, I'm truly convinced that it's like a propaganda arm, some NGO is like in the influencers DMs and in the celebrities like and pressuring because if they can get the spokespeople with the biggest platforms to start speaking on these subjects, it trickles down so easily. Does that make sense? Like if your friend who's an influencer who has two million followers starts speaking out with the stance of like, oh my gosh, they just attacked my moral fiber. I have to speak out against ICE, for example. Like or COVID or COVID. Or COVID.

it or whatever it is, then it trickles down, then someone who's like, I just follow these couple influencers, they're speaking out. Should I be speaking out? Do you remember the black box? Yeah. Like, it's the same thing with the black box. Like, everyone posted the black box. And we didn't even really know what it meant. No one knew what it meant. And then we got hate for posting the black box. Well, do you know that? Okay, so today everybody's like ice out. And I'm like, I don't know what that means. But apparently everybody's icing out, which I think it's meaning they're not spending any money. Like I don't, I literally don't know because I haven't had time to, like figure it out. I was really worried about making this Bible study this morning.

So I like, I'm going to be honest, they don't feel like grassroots campaigns. They feel like coordinated, like propaganda like pushes. No, they feel like virtue signals to like feel like you are making a difference. But it's really just bullying people to say stuff that you, that you, that you want them to agree with. Yeah. And I think some communication firm out there that works for either the right of the left knows exactly how to attack. people's moral fiber and make people bend the knee because people would rather say something that they don't believe or don't have true conviction over versus being deemed a bad person. I think it's our greatest weakness is like carrying what people think so much that we're like,

it's the same like reason that we post the black box. Yeah, I think it's why I didn't post it this time because I was like, I mean. No, you didn't. I was like, I know, I know how I feel about this and I know what I feel convicted about. I know what I feel is right or wrong. And I don't need to post something out there to make myself feel like a better person. Like I feel like I've crossed that. I think that's one of the things about getting older that is so great.

That's why I think my mom was like the 40s of the best years of your life because you're like, I do Gaff. Like you literally don't care what people think. And I have found that like as I've gotten older, I'm like, I read these DMs from people that like, I'm disgusted with you because you haven't used your platform to speak. I literally felt like bad for them. Like I was like, this is so silly that like this is what you're spending your time doing. But like five years ago, I would have been crawled up in a ball dying crying. And I would have too. I would have been like, we have a baby on a way. This is our economic means of survival. But like that's what I'm saying is like we're so privileged to be able to not

care about that. And that's what's so unfortunate in this day and age because even someone who's not a social media influencer, like these people, like, they're getting docs, like a normal people who don't tow the line. Remember I got those brand deals? Who don't tow the line. But I'm not saying, let's say you have a nine to five. Normal people who don't tow the party line of whatever that is or whatever is the predominant message of the internet are literally getting docs like, hey, did you know that this employee didn't speak out against this? Like the, I don't know if it's happening that much. No, it is. It is. It's crazy. I don't know. So it's privileged to be able to have your own opinion. I really do think that.

It sucks, but it's true. The one thing I was hoping for with my post was like I hadn't seen anyone say something like similar to what I was saying, which was like I just saw everybody like, I don't know. And I really hope that when people read it, they felt the same like they felt like they felt like they didn't have to like say something that they like didn't believe in or didn't understand in the moment. And this has nothing to do with like Minnesota. And I'm talking COVID. I'm talking everything political. This has nothing to do with that situation. It's like, duh, what happened to him was awful. Like we all agree with that. It's disgusting. Like, we don't have to fight about that. I agree with you guys. I think like the whole situation with ICE, it's, it's craziness. It's

craziness. Everything that's happening is crazy. And I agree with all of that. But like I don't, I don't feel like people should be pressured to say, say something, and that's going to make them like a better person. I just don't. I don't believe that, especially on social media. Yeah. How about this baby's dribble tonight? Okay. What is one thing you're excited about for this weekend?

We have all those school tours. Yeah. Isn't that like the biggest year that like these schools listen to our podcast? No. Oh, I think about it every day. No. we are who we are. If anything, they should let us in.

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