De-Influenced with Dani + Jordan - Everything Hit at Once

Episode Date: January 15, 2026

This episode is a real-time recap of one of those weeks. We’re talking third trimester health scares, unexpected hospital trips, and trying to hold it together when your body and life both decide to spiral at the same time. We also get into marriage moments that feel painfully relatable, why mom groups can turn messy fast, and a few observations on what’s happening in the world without turning this into a politics episode. Honest, chaotic, and exactly where we’re at right now. We scored some great deals with a few of our favorite brands for our listeners: The art of winter layering - soft textures, thoughtful details and knits designed to move from a day on the slopes to cozy fireside moments. shop minnow's new apré-ski capsule collection at shopminnow.com and enter code MEETMINNOW15 at checkout to receive 15% off your first order. Don't let financial opportunity slip through the cracks. Use code DANI at monarchmoney.com in your browser for half off your first year. Take proactive care of your health and head to OPositiv.com/DANI or enter DANI at checkout for 25% off your first purchase Redefine your standard of health. Secure 20% off your order and begin your intentional wellness journey today at Piquelife.com/dani Give yourself the luxury you deserve with Quince! Go to Quince.com/dani for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Get organized, refreshed, and back on track this new year for WAY less. Head to Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. Wayfair. Every style. Every home. Make sure you’re subscribed to our official channel on YouTube, @deinfluencedpodcast, and follow us on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your De-Influenced fix! Stay connected with us on Instagram and TikTok @deinfluencedpodcast, and as always thank you for being a part of this journey. Produced by Dear Media

The following podcast is a dear media production. Hello, and welcome back to your favorite podcast. D. Influence. We are so grateful that you're with us today because you know what? You survived your first of typically two or three ER visits in your third trimester. It wasn't just an ER visit, Pam. Yeah, it was. That's all I survived this week.

No, that's what I'm saying. Well, I didn't get into what you had. How many strains of virus and flu and. things you had, but typically we go in for, was it GERD or gallstone attacks? Well, sorry, can we recap the entire week? Because I didn't just go to the emergency room. I had a UTI. Yeah, so I was going to get there, but yeah.

I had allergic reaction to the antibiotic, which went to the doctor. Then I had that night. I had a gallbladder attack. Which is basically like a six-hour heart attack. That same week I found. out I had COVID, which was also really intense, probably the worst of them all. No, probably the hospital visit. And then, yeah, all while pregnant, so you can't really take much. Yeah. But yeah, so I think all of those, there was just like multiple things happening and then the

GERD attack. And so then we went into the hospital that night. Yeah. So it was hard. Well, I mean, it was, yeah, I mean, I just felt bad because, I mean, it's, it's really, not fair that a human being should be carrying another human being and have that many strands of virus or bacterial infections. Yeah. This is not fair. I agree. But you know, you powered through pretty great. Yeah. I made it. I'm here. I feel okay today. 80%? Um, yeah, probably. I felt better yesterday. Funny enough. I know. I know. I noticed. But my throat kind of hurts again. So, you know, I probably have the flu now.

It's actually shocking that I'm not sick. Yet. Summit is super sick now. I'm really worried about him. Drop like flies. Yeah. So, but yeah, I, I, um, I mentally stayed strong, I think. You really did.

Yeah. I'm proud of you. Yeah. I fought, I fought the good fight. You fought the good fight. You fought the good fight for sure. And I mean, honestly, you weren't even going to, I could tell you didn't want to go into the hospital. You really didn't want to go. Oh, to for Gerd or for the golf bladder. You held out for as long as you

could. Well, because they don't do anything. And they give you fentanyl, which lasts like only 20 minutes. And then you just like, more and more. And that's like, that's the problem. Yeah. And it's just like, honestly, it's just a time suck. And it takes away from your sleep. Yeah. You just like wait around for so long that I was like, I'd rather do this at home if I can. Yeah. And then it just got, I think I had been going through it for like five hours and I was like I'm just I'm too tired of feeling pain yeah during the it was a bummer because it happened during the the playoff game yeah well you kept watching the game I know I was well okay let me be clear there was nothing I could do about the GERD I I was emotionally supportive I left went to CBS I got all the anti acids yeah so I can kind of tell like what happened that

night. Yeah, yeah. So I went to bed really early that night. I was hoping to. We put the kids to bed. And I think maybe because I had COVID already and I didn't know I had COVID at the time, I don't know. I just like didn't have like an appetite that day. So I ate really late. Like I think I had my first meal at like five o'clock, which is not like me. I'm usually like chowing down all day long. So at five o'clock, I'm like, okay, I'm going to eat. What did I have? What did I tell you that I had? Oh, we went to, um, we didn't go anywhere that night. We didn't? No, I made dinner at home.

Oh, I think I had that soup. Remember? I had the soup that, like, we had for our kids. It was like a very healthy, like, chicken noodle soup type of thing. So I had that soup. And then because I was, oh, my, my aura ring was telling me that, like, for the past three or four days from that UTI that I was, like, really stressed out and I wasn't sleeping well because I had to pee so much.

So I was like, I'm going to go to bed early. Like, I'm going to get all my, like, eight hours. So I made myself some peppermint tea. And this tea that I made was like a special one. I've been, like, saving for a long time for, like a special night that I wanted to relax. So I got in bed and started watching, like, landmanned or something. And, like, probably 20 minutes into my tea, I was like, oh, gosh. I started to have, like, really, really bad heart pains or chest pains.

And I was like, no, please. is no, because I know exactly what this feels like. So I basically, I call it laboring. I basically labored by myself for an hour because I was like, I'm not going to tell Jordan because it's probably going to go away in an hour. I took my tums. I took my Pepsid. I was like, I'm not going to make a big deal of it because sometimes that happens where

it just like happens for like 10 minutes and then goes away. So then after an hour, I was like, this isn't going away. This is going to stay for the night. So I went out and told Jordan by this time. probably nine o'clock and he's watching the football game and I'm like listen I think this is gonna be a bad one um and so it progressively got worse and so we kept like looking up stuff on chat ch ptie what do you do so finally he was like okay I'll go to the store there's this like magnesium drink that was supposed to help and um and he did chat jpt also said one thing you should avoid

was peppermint tea yeah which I just didn't know and I thought I was doing like a good thing And oh, that was the other thing is I had been eating really healthy because I had, I was trying to, like, get rid of this UTI. So I was, like, really trying to eat, like, more bland foods that, like, weren't super acidic or anything. And so I was, like, actually doing really well with my diet because I was so, like, over this UTI. Anyway, so I thought the peppermint tea would be, like, good for me, like, good for digestion and all of that. And then I just, like, screwed, like, shot myself in the foot. So, anyway, we did all that. He came back.

by this time it's been like two hours and so that that third hour we call like our nanny and we're like hey can you come over like we might have to go to the hospital so we did another labor like for like another hour and i was like i'm not going in i don't want to i'm like we've we've already done this for three or four hours like it'll be gone soon and it just didn't so then we just drove to the hospital we got home at like what three three yeah i think i went to bed at like four yeah three or four I had I mean all things considered I had a lot of fun with you though that night we talked about the Roman Empire yeah people you got a little bit like you got a little loopy on the fentanyl you weren't like that loopy I did not get loopy you did a little bit you were just like you know you were happier and there was a moment you looked at me and you go I don't think you feel bad for me remember that and you kind of gave me a whole a whole speech about we were also kind of delirious I think that was like after a had worn off, though. Oh, okay.

Honestly, it didn't make me loopy at all. Oh, yeah. Bummer. Hold that for nothing. No, I'm just saying, like. Don't take fentanyl kids. Yeah. Well, the funny thing is it did end up helping, but like, honestly, the first, like 20 minutes, like, I was still in pain, too.

You know what I thought they took great care of you, but, and this is all, this is all protocol. But you know what I thought was kind of crazy is what would happen is first you call. the on-site nurse from the OB office. And you're like, here's what I'm going through. So you explain it all. It takes you like five minutes to explain what you're going through. And you're in pain.

You're like, it's level eight. Then you go to the check-in counter and you have to explain to them what you're going through. Then they put you in a bed and you have to explain it to the nurse what you're going through. Yeah.

And so everyone knows by this point that you're in pain and then they have to bring in the actual doctor and you've got to tell her what you're going through. Yeah. Then they bring in the OB on site. You have to tell her where you're going through. Then they give you the pain meds.

Yeah. Well, it just, I almost advocated for you. I wanted to like trust the process. But it was crazy like you're literally breathing in pain. Yeah. And you're like,

yeah, it's like an aid. I feel like I'm in labor. You're like kind of groaning like you're in labor. Yeah. And you have to keep telling people what you're feeling. I know. Well,

but I guess, you know, there should be a lot of checks and balances before they just hand out fentanyl, I guess. Yeah, they give you such a small amount that I don't think it's actually that dangerous. But like, I think that it's protocol, especially because we didn't go to the ER. We went to labor delivery. So it was actually more about like checking to make sure baby is okay first, which I knew baby was okay because he was kicking literally nonstop, like nonstop when I was going through this. but yeah basically it kind of feels like a heart attack like a like a burning chest pain but more like

stabbing actually and then it would radiate like to my back my middle of my back and then like up my neck and then down to the left side of my stomach and it would go in cycles but like I've had a natural birth and like I would say those contractions are like nine 10 obviously like the ring of fire like when you're pushing is like death like you can't even put that on a scale in my opinion like it's so shocking that you basically are dead. Am I what I like you can't even put that. So but I would say this is like what I went through was like are seven or an eight compared to like those contractions.

So it's like it was like so pretty painful. Does it make you a question doing a natural birth? No, you don't make me question doing a natural birth was I just got a spray tan and I've been reading because, you know, when I did a natural birth, sorry, unmedicated birth, all births are natural. Is this? Yeah. Oh, the proper?

Yeah, yeah. Politically correct. So, and it is actually, it's natural birth and unmedicated, they're different, but. So when I was, so now my whole algorithm is like about like, you know, positions and things you should do or you shouldn't do on an unmedicated birth. Because like when I did it last time, like I literally decided like two weeks prior and I was like, I'm trying to this thing and like see what happens. And I read nothing. I had no plan. I had no idea what I was doing.

And there's a lot of things I would do differently now. Like the major number one thing is pushing on your back. Like laying down in that position and pushing the baby out is just like so, I swear it added to like the torture. It felt like a torturous thing whenever I do think that most people that push probably push like standing up like gravity. Like it's like comes out. Like you don't lay on a, like that slows down.

the process. Anyway, so that's like the number one thing, but I've been fed like all these videos of like how to prepare and how to breathe. And another thing that I did that was like apparently like a big no-no is like when you're pushing, you shouldn't be making faces and like your your face shouldn't get red because you should really focus all of that energy down like there. And like I watch videos back in me and like I'm like my face is. It was like all the pressures in my head. And so, um,

so I, they were like, one of the things you can do to prepare is to take ice cubes and hold ice cubes and try not to like clench your face and not to make a face and just like breathe through it like, and like through the pain. Basically like train your brain to like breathe through the pain instead of like tensing up, you know?

Because that just takes more energy away from like where it should be focused. So I've been thinking about doing it But like I also You know how I am with cold plunges Like I cannot Like I am the worst at like that mental pain When it comes to cold I cannot do it

I can do it with a shot It's weird like when I get shots Or like pricks or anything Like I can like breathe And like not think about it And like let that pain happen over there But if it's cold So anyway I went to go get a sprayy tins

And I'm one of the reasons I hate getting spryotins is because they're so cold. Like the formula that they use is like ice cold water. Like that's what it feels like. And it's- They should fix that. I know.

It's so fixable. Exactly. I think about this all the time. That seems so fixable. Like I'm just like, can y'all just like warm up your formula? Like it's torture. And like it's only, the whole thing is only five minutes.

But it is so cold. And so when they spray your chest and your back and it's like already like cold outside, and then you go into a room and you get butt naked and then you spray. It's just like. It's like putting on sunscreen. I just can't help but like, you know, clench. And so I was like, oh, this will be really good training for me today. So I went in and I was like, like, because I always get really, really like stress during that part.

And I was like trying to breathe through it. I couldn't do it. Yeah. I couldn't do it. Well, you don't feel cold though whenever you're giving. No, but it's just a way to like. breathe through the pain. You did pretty well during the

the Gerd attack. Not really. I was like screaming. I mean, yeah. I mean, you definitely clinch up your body and stuff, but... I was like, what is this happening? I hate that this is happening.

This is the worst day ever. What is this happening? Please help me, please. Please, please go away. I don't think the rule for giving an unmedicated birth, though, is that you're stoic through the whole thing. So there are some births.

I've been watching a lot. They're all on my feet. Like, I, this is what I do. It like. I know. Isn't that like an Instagram versus reality thing? No. Some of these women like train and they train themselves to like just like breathe through

the pain. Like I've watched like the whole video. Oh my God. There was this one. I don't want to know. I don't know. Oh my gosh. Can I just say it?

No. Just don't listen. Everybody else wants to hear it. Okay. There was this one that I watched and it was like a five part video of this girl. that was like very, she was like so set on doing an unmedicated at home birth. She had a zula and everything. And she labored, I mean, she had the most intense contractions for probably, I don't know, six or seven hours. And this baby would just not come out. But she was like so set on it that

finally like the baby started come out. But if you don't get the baby out in a certain amount of time, it's like kind of dangerous. So she ended up having it a piece of. With no no no pain medication and her husband passed out next to her on the bed and Like literally that's what saved the baby and then what sucks is like because apparently like it wasn't done right because it was more of like a panic situation Um She's had to get like three more surgeries because it never healed right and it's like so she's had to head like three more Epiziotomies like all the way That's why I won't do it at home birth like

I just, I, like I, I, I, I just can't. Like, I can't. And I want like the utmost like full medical attention. And like, if something goes wrong, I just want, I want it all. Like, sure. But no, I, but here's the thing. I remember, I'm going to be honest with you. I remember when I was, sorry, this is two men in the room. No, Jordan. Okay. I'm sorry. It's beautiful. I just remember that like, the pain that was happening was so much worse that I was like an episiotomy would be heaven right now. Like that's what I thought when I was pushing. I was like,

that's why I remember when I was looking at the doctor, I was like, just cut him out. Just cut him out. I kept saying, just cut it out. Like, because that would have actually relieved more pain or like felt better than what was going on. So honestly, that probably is what happened to her too. But I mean, I'm telling you like,

women are like pretty tough like it's pretty crazy well i can't wait for maybe we just i don't know it's your call your body your choice i'm gonna try it you know my thing is i don't like to set myself up for failure so i don't like to be like no i'm gonna do it for sure because then i'm embarrassed when i like tap out you also it's so i don't know how to explain it it's so like the style of the Austin women to not want to train for it, but to just show up and do it and win on the spot. I don't know how to explain it. It's like, yeah.

Because you know, yeah. It's a little thrill. It's a little thrill. No, I'm going to be honest, the reason why I don't want to train or, like, learn too much about it, is I overthink it. And it really starts to freak me out. And, like, I just, I, like, I overthink it.

And then I don't want to do it. do it. And so that's why a lot of times I don't, there's a lot of things where I'm just like, okay, we'll figure it out when I show up. Yeah. Kind of like the shoot I have tomorrow. I have a maternity shoot tomorrow and like I literally don't know what I'm wearing. And I'm like, honestly, I don't think about it because I'll stress myself out about it. Yeah, no, and I'm glad that you're not stressing yourself out about it. Um, all right. So here's something I've learned over time. When your space is chaotic, everything else feels harder. Work feels heavier. Routines fall apart faster and you just feel behind before the day even starts. And especially at the start of a new year,

there's something really motivating about getting your home dialed in so life runs a little smoother. That's why Wayfair makes so much sense right now. When you're trying to get into your routine, you actually enjoy, it helps to have one place that has everything you need for your home. Bedding, storage, furniture, decor, Wayfair really is a one-stop shop which saves so much time and mental energy. And as you guys know, there's been a big focus. in our house lately on making spaces more functional, aka Danny is in full nesting season. We've been really focused on storage that actually works, furniture that fits real life, and rooms that feel calm instead of cluttered. Whether it's getting the kids' rooms more

organized, setting up better storage in the garage, or just refreshing the living room with things like accent pillows, mirrors, or plants, Wayfair makes it easy to find options that fit your style and your budget. One thing that stands out is their selection. You can be shopping for something specific like shelving or storage bins and suddenly realize you can also knock out things you've been putting off for months. And the site makes it easy to compare styles, prices, and options so you can find exactly what works for your space. At the end of the day, being organized isn't about perfections. It's about creating a home that supports your life. And Wayfair makes that process way more approachable.

Get organized, refreshed, and back on track this new year for way less. head to wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R-com, Wayfair. Every style, every home. Okay, let's be honest for a second. We've all tried to fix our skin from the outside, serums, creams, masks, all of it. And sometimes it helps,

but if your body is stressed or dehydrated underneath, your skin kind of tells on you anyway, especially this time of year when everyone's talking about resets. I've been thinking more about what actually supports your body from the inside out. That's why Peak has really stood out to me. Their whole philosophy is where science meets nature,

taking powerful botanicals, minerals, and vitamins and elevating them with advanced extraction technology so your body can actually absorb them. It's very intentional, very clean, and very much focused on fundamentals. The radiant skin duo is built around a simple but smart idea. Skin needs two things, less inflammation and better hydration.

The first part is sun goddess macha, which is ceremonial grade matcha grown and volcanic soil. This isn't just about, energy. It supports detoxification, helps calm stress, and reduces inflammation, all things that directly impact higher skin looks and feels. The second part is BT Fountain, which is basically luxury hydration for your skin barrier. It's not a sports electrolyte. It's designed specifically to support deep cellular hydration with ingredients like hyluronic acids, seramides, and collated minerals. It's especially helpful if your skin ever feels dull, dry, or like makeup that just doesn't sit right.

by the afternoon. What's really cool is how these two work together. One helps calm and clear things out. The other helps rebuild and rehydrate. And that's when people start noticing less puffiness, brighter tone, fewer flare-ups, and that overall, you look really good glow without changing a million things in your routine. It's simple, it's thoughtful, and it's a very different approach to skin health. Redefine your standard of health, secure 20% off your order and begin your intentional wellness journey today at peaklife.com slash janny. That's P-I-Q-Q-U-E, life.com slash d. Let's talk about something that I feel like women just quietly deal with month after month, PMS. The bloating that cramps, the mood swings, the hormonal acne that pops up right when you don't

need it, it's exhausting. And for a lot of women, it's just something we're told to push through, even though it affects everything from how we feel to how we show up in our daily lives. That's why I love seeing brands like O Positive exists. They're a woman's health company that focuses on real symptom targeting solutions for women at every stage of life. And they actually started by creating the world's first ever PMS gummy vitamin, which tells you everything you need to know about how intentionally they approach women's health. Their flow PMS vitamins are designed specifically to help with common PMS symptoms like hormonal acne, bloating, mood swings, and cramps. It's a plant-based daily vitamin made with ingredients like Chaseberry, Dong P, vitamin B6, and Lemonbaum. Things that work

with your body, not against it. Chaseberry is particular and known for supporting relief from menstrual cramps by interacting with feel-good receptors in the body. What really stands out to me is how many women talk about finally feeling like more balanced after taking flow consistently. When used daily just one capsule a day, people often notice benefits within two menstrual cycles, clearer skin, less bloating, fewer mood swings, things that actually make a difference in everyday life. PMS has ever felt like something that controls your month instead of the other way around. This is a really proactive way to support your body instead of just reacting to symptoms when they show up.

Take proactive care of your health and head to ohositive.com slash Danny. or enter Danny at checkout for 25% off your first purchase. That's O-P-O-S-I-V.com slash Danny for 25% off. Man, the only thing I would say is that we were like two weeks off from this GERD attack from having access to chat GPT health that they're coming out with. That would be cool. That would have been awesome. Because, I mean, I queried a lot of things that are just forever going to be in the open record.

Oh, yeah. Like it's like the cool thing about chat GPT. It's private. Yeah, it's HIPAA compliant. Oh, that's sweet. And they combine all of your medical data so you can, like, port in your medical records. Oh, no way. And, like, the history of what you've gone through?

Wait, what are, like, concierge doctors going to do? No, 100%. I'm like, I'm not, it's going to take a lot to get me to the doctor. My doctor's been asking me for a physical for five years. Can this doctor, like, order you tests and stuff, like a COVID test or, like a. Well, I. I don't know how it's going to evolve, but like right now, everyone's asking Chachabit for health information, but it's like going into, like, it's not really private or protected. Yeah.

But now it's like if you treat it like a therapist, like those are like protected conversations. Like they can't be brought up in court or anything like that. It's all HIPAA, which is crazy. And like I do function health. and so like I'm getting my blood work tomorrow and then on Thursday. Let's ask chat Chb-T like what's the craziest thing that we've asked you in 2025? And we don't have to share it, but like let's see if it's shareable. Okay.

Okay, you go first. Your is a funnier. You see. He said, you seriously explored moving your family to Nashville and turning a, turning a mansion into a multi-entity, multi-creator content house. You did. well your mom was like I'm not going to move and I was like okay how do I get her there and then I was like maybe I'll make it like a content house and then yeah

anything else um no that's not even that bad I know I feel like I ask way worse questions than this me too mine said it's funny because you don't ask crazy in a chaotic way you ask unhinged but logical questions um does hummus make you get puffy that's like so what I expected. You're a chat. When does sharing become oversharing if your life is your brand? Yeah, I mean. Oh, can you give us kids?

And I put a picture of me and you. And I just wanted to see if Chatjibati's kids looked like my kids now. Oh, did it? No. No. No. The next was the honorable runner up was designing an entire if I die. operational binder in case I died.

Because I felt really concerned about that. There was something that happened to me recently. Maybe this is the plane. I don't know. We weren't prepared though. Yeah. You didn't know the passwords. Yeah.

What else is crazy that's going on? Oh, also health-related, new food pyramid. Yeah. That's good. I feel like there's a lot of stuff going on in the world. So much going on. Like, can we talk about the good and the bad? Can you just, Feloson, I've been so sick for so long?

A lot is going on in the world. I feel like I, every time I open Twitter right now, it is like, boom. It's like, whoa, that happened today. It's like, I think it's because midterms are coming up. And so, like, everyone's ripping. Like, well. The, like, the administration is, like, ripping to try and get, like, results and, like, make big headlines and waves.

Yeah. So it's like reforming housing affordability. It's like defense contractors, no more stock buybacks. It's like new food pyramid. Yeah. And it's definitely like I think I also read that they're now starting to release a bunch of the stuff about like the 2020 election. You know, because he stood by his claim that it was stolen.

So he's like releasing a bunch of information there. then there's the daycare thing and so it's like yeah the Somalian daycare yeah it's ripping right now so sorry I'm like I literally don't know what's going on so don't come for me

but basically the Somalian daycare situation was just they were is this super politicized I mean I feel like this is really well okay so here's here's the objective take is that there are

there are welfare programs within the government of Minneapolis that a large part of it is for child daycares. So like you can run a daycare and basically the government pays to employ your people and to help you run it. Well, they, the claim is that there are hundreds, if not thousands, of ghost daycares. So basically, like ghost rehabs. Yes, or like ghosts. There's, They're starting to uncover that in like addiction centers too. Which is definitely true I've read a lot of. Yeah. So it's like these ghost daycares and ghost addiction therapies that are funneling millions of dollars out of the government and into pockets.

But then there's like a road. Smart criminals. But then there's a rotating door of like then those criminals that are getting the dollars funneling them back into political campaigns. So the revolving door is like... Wait, so you're saying the Somalians are funding political communes? Well, so the Somalians are just a large population in Minneapolis that over the past, like, call it five to ten years, have... Opened a lot of daycares. No, they...

Well, first of all, they migrated to Minneapolis. They were welcomed into Minneapolis. And now there's a huge population. of Somalians in Minneapolis. So nothing wrong with that, totally fine. But of these, like the welfare fraud, the accusation is that this is largely done within the Somalian community. Okay.

So that's where kind of like the racket is happening and held. And so, what was your question? I don't really, like, I don't really care like who's doing. I'm just trying to figure out what they're doing. So, yeah, there's, there's like a whole, I think what they think is there's a whole ecosystem. So there's like the government programs, then there's the politicians that either know or don't know about it. So they're trying to figure out like was where the politicians complicit in this. Kind of like when they look the other way, CIA or the FBI like knows about us working with the cartel or whatever.

But it's like, hey, we just got to do it. Exactly. Because it betters the whole country. So then it's like what politicians knew it. And then these immigrants are probably not. not applying for this on their own. So then there's like a whole slew of law firms and like, like application handholding and like that apparatus of people.

It's very complicated. It's very complicated. And most likely it's a whole just like, if you know, you know type of ecosystem. And so, but they're saying biggest fraud in like probably our country's history. How many billions?

Um, do you know, I think like, was it like 30 billion or something? Or 132 billion or something like that? No, it's like, it's at least tens of billions. But here's the crazy thing is that, so what's so interesting is that they're like uncovering this in Minneapolis now, but then there's like New York, there's California. There's like all of these other states that have these large welfare programs as well. And then they're also asking like, you know, for example, Spencer Pratt from the hills. He's running for mayor.

Did you know that? Yeah. The big headline. I think this is the most interesting headline. It's like when Kanye ran for president. No, it's different. It hits different because he's been basically calling out the fraud within the Pacific Palisades, like fire aid. Yeah.

That just like most of the money either like didn't go towards rebuilding or completely disappeared. So he's running on that ticket. And Brody Jenner came out and, like, highly endorsed him and was like, listen, Spencer Pratt graduated political science from USC. He is one of the smartest people that I know. Like, he is not just a reality TV star. He knows what he's doing. And, like, legitimately endorsed him for mayor.

Wow. And a lot of people are coming behind him because what's happening is it's almost like this Minnesota thing. Like they started yanking at a ball of year. yarn. And now all of these threads are leading back to, okay, what happened in the money that was taxpayer money in the Pacific Palisade thing? And then it's like, okay, well, then also, why do we keep losing, like, billions of dollars that we devote towards like California homelessness clean up? So what I think is happening is that like all of these things that are sort of

built around like seemingly good empathetic programs are becoming, okay, like are these really real, are these actually providing aid, or is this totally fraud? So that's what's interesting. So much of it is such a mess. Oh, it's a total mess. But honestly, I think that what I find to be the most disgusting thing about it is, like, I think about like people that we employ at Diddy or like the average working American who's having to make a decision of do I, can I afford to have more children because I can

can't afford for my wife or my husband to stay at home because we can't also afford daycare because daycare costs for the people who are not getting subsidies is like this up into the right. So the cost of living is completely inflated. And we have a population crisis. So people, families who legitimately want to have more kids can't afford to do so. So if our tax dollars, which prevent our ability to keep up with the cost of living, because they go to the government, are then being reallocated and fraudulently taken by non-American citizens who are like taking advantage of programs. Like that's, I would be very angry if we were in that position. Yeah.

It's horrible. No, for sure. And a lot of people are angry. Yeah, I don't know. I can't tell how angry people are. I think we're like, I think most, it feels like people are so disillusioned and they're like, cool, you discovered it, but nothing's going to happen. no one's going to go to jail like nothing's going to happen.

Especially after Epstein files. Yeah, it's kind of like we're just stuck in this broken system and, you know. Like what are we going to do? And then I think a lot of people thought, oh, Trump is not a politician. He'll come in and, you know, do a lot of crazy things. And then like his first month, he's like, forget about the Epstein files. Yeah, the only thing I would say is that because what this is doing, I would say what, so that's what the right is saying is like this is fraud.

It's all in the Somalians. Then what the left is saying is like, you know, Trump is like mobilizing a militia, i.e. ICE, to pin this fraud on one community to get immigrants out. Oh, okay. Because. Well, everyone's probably taking advantage of the situation to prove their point and their story. They're framing it. It's all framing.

So, so what I, what I get confused by is because we're in midterm season, I hope that, like, maybe it is a situation where this is being framed by the right against one immigrant population. Like maybe it's not all just the Somalians that are taking care, you know, advantage of it. It may be like a large percentage because it's cultural or like, oh, I know my friend also moved to America. You got to move to America. You know, there's this program.

You just open a daycare, put an address up and you're fine. Yeah, it might just be like a thing that happens. I mean, but I remember reading about the, um, Rehab like sober living centers in I think it was California, Arizona like more on the West Coast, but they were taking advantage of Native Americans and they were targeting like alcoholic drug drug addicts that were Native American and using their insurance. Yeah.

To like basically pay themselves, but they didn't, a lot of times they would take in these Native Americans that were sick and just basically keep them sick so that they could keep on like. Yeah, because you're not incentivized. to get them healthy. That's a real story. That's a real story that, like, it,

they, like, discovered all these people. A lot of them went to jail, and it was, like, I mean, hundreds of millions of dollars, and it was crazy. So, yeah, this stuff definitely does happen, but I agree with you where, like Theo Vaughn always talks about it,

and he's like, okay, so now what? Like, nothing's going to change, and that's what's so disheartening about it. And I could totally see how everyone just uses these stories and these big things to prove, the point that they want to prove. And there are so many angles to these stories. I always wonder, though, if, like, one of these big politicians came in and, like, just sided

with the other side or understood the other side publicly, like, with that... Well, it always comes down to, like, right or left issues. So they do side with the other side. It just depends on who the other side is. No, but I'm saying, like, if Trump came in and was, like, yeah, like, I agree. agree with the left. Like, I see what y'all's point. And, like, I hate that it does make it seem like we're targeting, like, one community. But that's really not what this is about. Like, you know, and I'm sorry, I'm just like putting words in. I, not me. But like, or would that just

infuriate the right? Because they'd be like, you're not, you're a, you're a, you're a, um, fair weather fan. And like, you're just, you know, I just sometimes I wish that I feel like. I feel like, I feel like there's a way to solve this. Do you want to hear my way? Yeah. The way to solve this is, I think that the way to solve this is he uproots the fraud. Okay. So he solves the fraud issue because the fraud issue is like what is taking all of our tax dollars. So like property taxes, you know, say like all of our tax and it goes to the government, which is the most inefficient entity in allocating our money. So like everyone's milking off of us as Americans, the defense contractors, everyone is being milked because they're like all charge 30% more. Like when these school bonds come up in like different cities, I remember I was at this like event and they, one city council member for Dallas was talking about how they, for a student chair, they were trying to charge $2,000. You know those chairs that we had in public school? A student chair? Like a chair. Like literally a chair that the students, the desk and then they had like the plastic chairs. Do you remember those? The blue ones? The blue ones, yes. They were charging $2,000 for each of those. Just taking advantage of these bonds that come up that like if you're in Rockwall County, you have to like, your taxes increase to pay the bond to get this new school in. But then everything is inflated because the government's not vetting and controlling costs. on the actual execution of building high schools and things like that.

So I feel like everyone is happy if Trump uproots the fraud, makes our tax dollars more efficient by cutting off all things that are fraudulent and then cuts income tax, which he's talked about this year. He was like, we're really close, I think, to being able to actually cut income tax. Because then if you cut income tax, It's like no harm, no foul. Like we can all forgive each other. It's not a right versus right versus left issue.

It's like, okay, fine. That was then. You wasted all my tax dollars, but I'm happy now because my tax dollars are back. Now I can pay for child care myself. Like I don't need the government to subsidize it. You know, I have more money in my pocket as an American. And honestly, if they're trying to win the midterms, like everyone's happy. What leftist is going to be like, oh, I want to pay more in taxes.

I don't care what they say. They may say that, but when they're, like, actually not able to survive because they have to pay more in taxes, there's just no way. Everyone wins if we cut taxes. Just saying. That makes sense. Maybe it will happen this year. And then the economy would rip. Would rip.

It would rip. That'd be fun. Well, I'm, I'm. are you trying to run for president or something? No, I'm just saying, like, I've thought about how you fix this because now it's like such a politicized issue. It's like, if you speak against the daycare fraud, you're racist.

It's like becoming that essentially. So like, how do you solve that? You get rid of the fraud, which I think everyone would probably universally be okay with. You stop targeting the Somalians. Just get rid of the fraud. It's not about Somalians. Sorry, can I just ask a question?

Like, I really don't know anything. are people like defending the Somalians? Yeah, 100%. Oh, they're like saying that they need this? I don't know, do you know, I don't know if they're saying they need it. I think they're defending. So the fraud, when it comes to the Somalians,

the fraud isn't even talked about. It's the accusation is that the fraud is being framed in a way to actually target a minority immigrant group. Oh, but. Oh gosh. Okay. I know. It's confusing. Okay. Okay.

I don't think we know. Okay. But now it's like ice. It's just like this whole complicated thing. Okay. So I'm in a season where I still want to feel put together and fashionable, but no secret that I'm also super pregnant and still need pieces that are practical and comfortable. That's where Quince comes in. Quince just does the basics right.

Everything feels elevated, but effortless. And the quality is honestly what stands out. Their pieces are made from premium. materials crafted and ethical, trusted factories, and somehow priced way lower than what you'd expect for this level of quality. And I have to talk about their shoes and accessories because those are the things I probably reach for the most. Their leather bags, belts, and jewelry are just such staples. The kind of pieces that instantly pull an outfit together without trying too hard. And the shoes, so good, comfortable, classic, and actually hold up, which is huge for me.

But the pairs I end up wearing on repeat because they work with just everything. What I love is that Quince makes it easy to build a wardrobe that lasts. These aren't trendy pieces you wear once. They're staples. You'll be reaching for season after season. And you can really see it in the details. The stitching, the fit, the materials, everything feels thoughtfully designed. If you're trying to be more intentional with what you buy, if your piece is better quality,

quince is such a good place to start. Whether you're refreshing your closet or just looking for those go-to accessories that make outfits feel finished, they really have it all. Refresh your wardrobe with quince. Don't wait. Go to quince. com slash janey for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns now available in canada too that's q you i nc e dot com slash jani to get free shipping and 365 day returns quince dot com slash janey when you

have kids you start to realize how much of your day is spent negotiating comfort if something doesn't feel good you're going to hear about it so anything that just works no fuss no constant adjusting immediately becomes part of the regular rotation that's one of the reasons minnow stands out it's a family lifestyle brand that feels timeless but still fresh clean lines simple details and that effortless coastal vibe everything is thoughtfully designed and you can tell the focus is on quality comfort and ease not just how it looks what really sold me is how much our kids genuinely love wearing minnow no complaints no fighting getting dress no trying to peel something off halfway through the day their bathing suits are especially easy to put on and easy to take off with just the right

amount of stretch. The fabric is incredibly soft, keeps sand out of the lining, and actually holds up even after long days in the sun and water. Their best-selling pieces make total sense once you see them in action. The girls rash guard one piece, the boys' boardies, and the unisex rashguard shirts. Everything has UPF 50 plus protection, which blocks 98% of UVA and UVB rays. So there's a lot less worrying and a lot more enjoying the day. And for families who like a coordinated look without being overly matchy, minnow's collections make that really easy. It's also one of those brands where you can feel the intention behind it, inspired by the founder's coastal life built to last through multiple seasons and designed to support real life family experiences. Whether it's a pool day,

beach trip, or vacation, Minnow just makes things smoother. Go to shopminow.com and enter Meet Minow 15 now at checkout to receive 15% off your first order. Enter code meet Minnow 15 at checkout to receive 15% off your first order. That shopmino.com meet Minnow 15 for 15% off. One of my biggest priorities this year is reducing unnecessary stress and money stress is a big part of that. Just knowing where things stand, what's coming in, what's going out, makes everything feel more manageable.

After the chaos of the holidays, January always feels like the moment to reset and get intentional again. Managing your money doesn't have to be a struggle this year. Monarch is all in one personal finance tool designed to make your life easier. It brings your entire financial life budgeting, accounts and investments, net worth, and future planning together in one dashboard on your laptop or phone. Start your new year on the right foot financially and get 50% off your Monarch subscription with Code Dan. What makes Monarch really helpful for a new year reset is how clear everything becomes. You can look back at the holiday spending, see what actually happen, and then move forward with realistic budgets and goals instead of vague resolutions that disappear by February. Monarch helps you build goals that make sense for your actual life, not just what sounds good on January 1st.

I also love that Monarch is built to be proactive. It doesn't just show you numbers. It helps you understand patterns. their AI tools, surface insights you might miss on your own, like where spending has crept up, how savings are trending, or what changes are actually moving the needle. The weekly recaps are huge too, a quick snapshot that keeps things top of mind without needing to obsess over it. And you're not alone in that experience.

In a recent survey, Monarch users reported saving over $200 a month on average, and most said they felt more in control and had a clearer picture of where their money was going. That's the kind of momentum that actually lasts. This new year, achieve your financial goals for good. Monarch is the all-in-one tool that makes proactive money management simple all year long. Use code Danny at monarch.com for half off your first year. That's 50% off your first year at monarch.com with code Danny. I think we all agree that ghost daycares are bad and not fair for average Americans,

but you just never know. You get lost in these talking points. I know. At Planet Fitness, which honestly, I should be sponsored by. I've realized this. I'm the only one who is an advocate of Planet Fitness in the influencer world. They always have CNN and Fox News Up. I love that.

No, it's great. And then ESPN's like in the middle. And I'm like, I'm always trying to piece together what's going on. Yeah. It really is crazy if you put those two next to each other. how crazy how crazy polarized things really are. How different the same story can turn into. Yeah, like if Trump's ever doing something good,

Fox News has it up and immediately then CNN is not covering it, like objectively good. And CNN is not covering it and instead talking about some other scandal that he had. And vice versa. It's crazy. But we've known that for forever. Yeah, that's what makes it. It's fun.

that makes it so hard. I read today that 46% of voters are now independent. Really? It's like the highest ever on record, which means that we're all basically disassociating from both the extreme right and the extreme left. Which is great because the more... We think with our brains. The more common sense the politicians can be,

the more like they'll probably rise to power. I kind of love that. I also think that like it's like 50% of people just don't want to put on paper what they are because they're scared of the other. But that's okay. Wow. Vote Spencer Pratt. I'm kidding. I don't live in California, so I don't really know if you should.

Well, what else is going on? I have to pee, but I can wait. Yeah, let's just finish this out. Okay. I'll just get another ETI. It's fine. Um, can we move on to something just like a little bit more lighthearted? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. You know, I know. Because you, to be honest, usually I'm very up to date with these things. Like I, I go, I deep dive. Like the past month or so, like, I'm really preparing for a baby. And like, I just don't. I'm like, maternal and seeks kick in. I'm like, I don't care what's going on the world right now.

Like, all I care about is like what's right in front of me. And I don't have time to like, like, I'm like, I, this is. what I need. So I'm like nesting. I'm like more concerned about like taking care of myself, my mental health, like kids health. And like, so the world is just spinning around me. So I expect you to like if you can just take care of this. Yeah. Just let me know if anything really bad happens. We're not going to be affected. I mean, we are, but we're also, we have zero control over all these things happening. But it's fun to know about them. Yeah. Well, we're all affected by these things. The memes are just so great right now. Yeah. Like,

Some of the best memes really since COVID. Let me show you something. Okay. You save them? Yeah, save them all. The memes are just so good. This one is Maduro, the Venezuela president and Diddy. It's an AI video, dancing in a jail cell together.

I'll show you. Here it is. AI is really good. Oh, sorry. Sorry, that was Logan Paul. Oh, funny. Yeah, it's good. I got to stay entertained out here because, you know, you're entering into that third

trimester. Yeah. You gave me a warning on my birthday. You said, hey, I think it's about to get really hard. Yeah, I said, please don't touch me. Please don't touch me. She doesn't like to be talked to in certain hours. So I've really spent this time.

I started listening to Dan Carlin's, uh, history. Like, what's it called? Hardcore history. Yeah. on the Roman Empire, been really keeping up with current events. Good, good, hobbies. Thinking about how to save America, hobbies.

Have you told everybody about your newest infection? No. You don't want people to know? Well, that's fine. Jordan has ringworm, and it's really big and really bad, and he does not... To be fair, it's in the shape of a heart. It's huge.

You never have acknowledged that. It is in the shape of a heart. Also, you're not supposed to... Don't touch. it and you're not supposed to cover it up. Look, it's a heart. I know, babe. You're not supposed to cover it up.

And so this is what's so annoying about Jordan. It's like he's very, he's particular about the things that he cares about. Okay. Like, and, I mean, he either cares 100% or could not give an F. And Ringworm is just one thing he could give an F about.

Like, he just doesn't care. And it is so annoying to me because it's highly contagious. If you share towels or anything, by the way, like, every time you get a shower, he hangs his towel back up, and I'm like, I put it in the washer dryer. Did you know I do that for you every single day? Because you're basically trying to get me ringworm.

Anyway, so the other day, I found him some like anti-fungle cream that you're supposed to use an athlete's foot is the same thing you use on that. But that doesn't go away. Ringworm doesn't go away unless you treat it. I mean, it can stay for months. and you have to treat it like twice a day. And it's super, super contagious. Like if I just touch it, then I could get it.

And so I got on this cream, I put it next to his bed, and I can always tell that he doesn't use it because it's in the same position. Like, it's not being used, you know? And we had this like staycation for his birthday. And I was like, listen, you have to use it consistently for 48 hours. Like, or I'm not going to sleep in the same bed as you, like, for your birthday. Because I was like, I'm not.

And that was like the whole point of my birthday. And so We were really hearing up for that one. And so he like still was like not using the cream. And so I went into, I would say like probably like three nights ago, I went over to him and I was like, listen,

I just want you to know that if I get ringworm because you're not taking care of yourself, I will kill you. I was like, I was like, I will be, this is when I had COVID, UTI, GERD attack, hospital visits.

I was like, if I get ringworm on top of all of this, because you can't put a cream on at night and in the morning, I will be very, very angry with you. Like, more than you know. And I have kept track of every time he has used that cream since I've said that, zero. No.

Zero. No. No, it's zero. And then that night, though, I asked him, I was like, okay, like put it on. So he puts it on his leg and then grabs my face towel and wipes his hands off on my face towel. But I threw the face towel in the dirty clothes.

And so. And then he puts it back on the counter. And I look down and he goes, oh, sorry. And I had an itchy eye that week too. And I was like, oh, my God, this is probably. There's like a, it's so funny because you're so right about carrying 100% or 0%. And there's this toxic urge in me to like be so stubborn about this. I know.

Like I would rather move the bottle as though I used it than actually apply the cream. So you want ringworm? Like that's disgusting. No, I don't want it. I just don't think about it. I'm like, oh, I'll get to this when it becomes a problem to me. Yeah, it's about to become a problem if you don't take care of it. It's huge.

Your ringworm is huge. No, it's going away, it seems like. No. For some reason, in my mind, I'm like, this thing will clear up with some vitamin D and sun. It doesn't. That's why like dogs have to take like the ringworm. medication. It's super contagious. It's like that you actually have to take care. It's like a serious thing. It just doesn't. It just doesn't seem that serious because it's shaped like a heart.

How does ringworm go away? I really, we don't, we also don't know if it's ringworm. I mean, we ask. It's a 100% ringworm. Again, chat GPD health is not out yet. I don't know. I mean, like honestly, Danny, I've got I'm about to have to get on a lifelong medication because I would, was diagnosed with eczema. Did you know that? Lifelong. I got to go to this weird pharmacy and get it. So like, you know, skin issues to me are just like table stakes.

It's like the cost of living. I'm just, but I understand this like, so like, I'm going to be honest with you. This isn't about you at this point. It's about our kids and your pregnant wife that has like, I'm going to be having a newborn. Okay. That's going to get ringworm. Like, honestly. I don't care if you don't care about it now.

It's everybody else that we care about. Okay, okay. You're right. I'm going to go downstairs right after this. I'll put on the athlete's foot. Clear this sucker up. For a month, you have to put it on like for a long time.

You said 48 hours. So it goes away. So I, my new routine is I've got to do my medicube on my face. Oh my gosh. I got to do, I got to do my exoma lotion on my chest and my back. And now I got to put athletes,

foot on my shin. You got to understand. The reason you're experiencing such a hesitation from me is that that's a long morning routine. The rage that's coming through my body right now. That's a long morning routine. And then I got to take all my supplements. You can brush my teeth.

And then you're like, Danny, where's my outfit? Where's my outfit for the wedding? You didn't, you didn't iron my shirt? Even though I told you I had everything. everything ready than the night before. Oh, your point is, is that like you're trying to take care of me by telling me about the... I'm talking about that one time. No, I know.

I get it. I'll do it. I'll do it, okay. It's like you can't take care of it. I'm just going to need to wake up like 40 minutes earlier. Yeah, it'll take you a long time. My point is you can't take care of other people if you don't take care of yourself. No, I know.

That's why I shower first thing in the morning. It's very methodical. because if I'm not, if I'm not my best self before I leave the bedroom, there's, there's no, there's no breaks after I leave the bedroom. Okay.

You get what I'm saying? Like, it's the same reason like, you know, yeah, I totally get that method. Right now I just see you as like a smoker who won't stop smoking. And I'm like,

it's not that big of a problem. I'm like, you have like a huge ringworm on your leg that you just like forget about. Yeah. Okay. Well, move on to something lighter because, you know, my hormones are rocking and...

Yeah, they're rocking and rolling. They're rocking and rolling. So, have you heard about the Ashley Tisdell drama? No, actually, would you tell me about it? So it's kind of funny. It's like, it's not actually, like, relevant to my life, but it's, like, relevant to, like, a lot of moms out there, so I feel like we should talk about it. So Ashley Tisdale, um, she's basically in this mom group.

Yeah. Where a lot of these moms got pregnant in, like, 2020 and some of the other moms and the group are Megan Trainor, Mandy Moore, Hillary Duff. There's like probably like eight moms, eight to ten moms. They all hang out together. They do everything together, going trips together. It's kind of like. Sounds like this is never going to break up. Like mom talk, but like. Sounds like minimal drama. It's like celebrity talk. So Ashley Tisdale basically came out with an article. I think it was for the cut. Let me see. I actually wrote it down. So basically Ashley Tisdale came out with an essay called Breaking Up with My Toxic Mom Group.

And in it, she explained how she had been hurt and excluded and felt like this, this mom group that she was a part of. It felt like very like high school drama. And she's written about this and like mentioned this like in the public like two or three times. Like it's kind of become like her thing that she's been sharing. And she's like, a lot of people were like, wow, we find it so relatable. But then after people started to do more like,

research, they realized, oh, she's a part of this, like, very big, like, celebrity group, and she's friends with all these people. So at first, a lot of people thought that it was because Ashley Tisdale was MAGA. And the same day that that kind of, like, rumor came out, um, her husband posted like a bunch of stuff kind of, like, insinuating that they weren't. So it had nothing to do with politics. So then the, the drama continued to blow up when Hillary Duff's husband, Matthew Coma, he posted a Instagram story kind of mocking all of the drama. And he is, he like basically shaded Tisiel and called her the most self-absorbed tone deaf person on earth in this like spoof headline.

He ended up deleting it, which always is like a little weird to me like whenever the husband like gets involved. It's a toxic urge for sure. I've been there, but you can't do it. You never come out victorious. Well, it's also like, if there's other husbands involved, like, how about it? I'm fine with that. That's cool.

But, like, I just, I do feel like, like, a man should fight his own fight. Like, a woman should fight her own fight. Like, I don't like, like, men fighting women. Like, it's just really icky to me. And so basically all these people are trying to figure out, like, what exactly happened and why do all these people? So then Beck and Trainor end up posting, like, a post, like, another, like, sarcastic post being like, hey, like, just don't care. And all these people in this group are basically

like doubling down that Ashley Tisdill is crazy. The thing is that is tough for me is that I know that Ashley Tisdale when she wrote these articles, she's trying to be vulnerable and she's trying to be relatable and she's trying to be helpful. But like we all know what's going to happen. There's so many examples or so many like things I can think of in my mind where like I've had drama with friends but like I know I can't share it because people are going to figure like they're going to know who it is there's no way like if I share anything like any any detail people are like okay we're going to we know who that is and I'm not even like their level of celebrity so like to me I'm like Ashley like you knew what you were doing it kind of gives me a little bit of the

I think she's like super hungry for attention and I'm kind of with the group on this one. I think it's also like I don't know. I just feel like whenever the whole group agrees on something and like one person doesn't and one person is the quote unquote victim, I'm like, but why are you the victim? Like I don't know. Not always, but it just seems to me like maybe it was like warranted. and people, you know what happens is, and I know what happens in these situations.

Like, there's either, there's two scenarios. One where Ashley Tessdale just doesn't really have much to offer. Like she's just kind of there. She gets left out because people just like don't really care. And like she's maybe shy and just like doesn't really, I don't know. And then, because I feel like I've been in that situation in friend groups where like I've gotten left out. And it's not because people didn't like me. They just kind of like forgot about me.

Like, you know. But then I feel like there's another scenario where like people like secretly can't stand her. And they're like, you know, please like can we not invite Ashley? You know? And when you have like eight or 10 people in a group, like it's also really easy to like leave people out because it's like four people get together over here and then three people over here. It's like it's so hard to always.

We've had that too where our friend group has gotten so big that just dinner reservations were not. No, you literally. can only invite like six max so then somebody's going to get left out and it's like actually nothing personal you're just like trying to like logistically make things work and it's just hard but it seems like for this one people because of like the comments that they're saying now it seems like they didn't want her around it wasn't like they just like forgot yeah i'm surprised anyone siding with her for writing an essay about this as a famous public figure you're so dumb.

So even bringing that attention. She knows, she knew exactly what was going to happen. Like, this whole, like, victim thing, if you're going to,

like, try and build a brand on victimhood, it'll last so, like, you'll get it. You'll get the attention in the short term, but,

like, long term, it fades so quick. I think the best way to, like, help people through situations like this is to find a mom

group that you really like and write the positives that you like about your like your friend group and say like or like this is what I really want in a friend group and like maybe I've we've I've struggled with like these themes in the past with like inclusion and this and that but you know maybe that just like wasn't the right group for me and like what I really appreciate about this friend you know and just but when you write a whole negative like hip piece on like it's just like what do you expect yeah it's like kind of good being like ew

Yeah, no, it's, she's the odd man. A lot of people, like, a lot of influencers do this. But Hillary Duff's husband shouldn't have said anything. Just big no-no. No, I know. What was he thinking? What did he post or do you write, like, an actual? He wrote, like, a story.

I mean, he did it post like an Instagram story. I mean, I could see, I see how it's funny. Yeah, he did like a spoofy thing. Yeah, if it's spoofy. I get it, but like. No, but no. It's no, no, no, boy, no. Because then all the other husband's got to get involved.

And then it's like an actual. thing and then it likes because usually i find that when the moms have drama in the group it's like the husbands are kind of just like let it blow over like it'll it'll be fine like we all kind of like laugh at y'all unless it's demire fighting unless it's demi from um secret lives of moral wives and no her husband got involved right no because she called him and she's like he touched me he put his hands on me and like he like literally just like pokes her who did Remember in that scene in Secret Lives in Mormon? Oh, yes, yes.

And that's when like, and then when you get like that type of male ego where they're like, I'm protecting my own, like, then like all these males get involved and like all of a sudden they like are justified. Yeah. He literally like poked her like, dupe. And then she's like, he touched me. And then he's like, did you touch my wife? Does you ever touch my wife?

It's like so silly. I wonder what the average shelf life of. Mom groups is? A mom group is. My opinion is that the average shelf life average. So there's better, there's worse. Okay, if it's you're a mom group before you have kids, I think the average shelf life is three years. I think if you're a mom group and your kids are at the same school, I think the average shelf life is five years, six years.

Here's the thing you're kind of, I think that we have to clarify on. mom groups typically like i think there's the stereotypical mom group that we're talking about has kids in the same grade in the same classes i think that's a longer that's a longer lifespan no i think that's way harder really why 100% because you are constantly comparing who got the who got the best grade sarah got this sarah left me out of the birthday party like trust me i i know because my mom was best friends with this lady and and her daughter was like was like was in my same class. And we weren't even like that good of friends, but we were, we were friends because our moms were friends. Now my mom's friend group where we were all spread out different ages,

that group stayed together. I mean, I think that they were friends for like 30, 40 years. Because older kids were in such different stages of life. And like we all were in such different things at different schools, private school, public school, athletes, musicians, that when we got together, it was just like, nobody, there was no competition. but I'm telling you when these girl moms, I've seen it, I've seen it myself. Like when these girl moms get together and all the girls in their same grade and then they find out, well, Sarah and Sarah and Michelle, you know, they all went to the lake and they didn't invite, you know, Jessica. And then Jessica's mom is like, well, why was that I invited too? Yeah, it's super hard.

It's super hard. I thought that being in the same class would give you a reason to uphold the. integrity of the group longer. Whereas like the reason I said the shelf life is before you have kids because what happens is like people have kids, people go to different schools, people kind of move away. That's a different type of friend group. That's just like friends that have babies. Like that's just that's going to break up.

Sorry, it's going to happen. Yeah. Because you're going to start hanging out with your your kids, friends, parents. That go to the same school. Yeah. And I think that those relationships are way harder. Unless it's a boy and a girl, I think that those relationships. relationships work really well together.

But when you're hanging out with all of your daughter's friends, moms, oh, my God. I've been in the rooms, like, when I remember when I was, like, in fourth grade and all the moms, all they do is talk about us. All they did was talk about their daughters. And like, well, you know, Kendall made this, and Danny's the captain of this. And this, and then you have this one mom in the corner being like, you know, because her daughter's not mentioned.

The dad's groups are not like this. I don't know. It would be interesting with sports. I don't know. Like, I don't know how dads are with that. But, like, you know, if they're hanging out with a bunch of, I don't know. I would have no exposure to it.

I mean, I would have, I don't know yet. But I don't think so. I don't think so. I can't imagine. Like, I feel like, I feel like we will know that our wife's struggle with this, but I feel like we will not give in unless there's. I don't know. I think dads and dudes like love the drama.

Well, you come home and you're like, babe, did you know that? Because this hasn't really happened to me, but like there have been times that I see that all of like Stella's. I think that you're saying that because your dad loved the drama. No, my dad did love to drama.

Yeah, but there's in times like that like Stella's like three of her like best friends in her class, like the moms will all take their daughters to go get their nails down. And they've invited me like multiple times. And honestly, we're not able to go. But then I'll see it. And I'll be like, oh, I wish we were there. Like, and it's all ready.

And Stella's like five. So imagine whenever they're like older how much like if, if Stella's being excluded by these moms and these girls that she wants to be friends with and I'm being excluded by the moms, it's going to hurt my feelings. And then y'all are going to come to me. Yeah. And I'm going to be like, oh, absolutely not. Exactly.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I'm just saying. I mean, I think it, you're right, because I think it would be harder, like, with dads of, like, girl dads. Because Stella's going to be, like, absolutely. Because Stella's going to be like, well, like, Stella told me the other day and this, I truly, like, I'm obsessed with the moms and her, I have literally no, nothing. But Stella told me the other day that one of them, I honestly can't remember who was, but one of the moms for her, for her birthday. Yeah.

The mom came and picked up two of the girls from school and took them to lunch. And Stella got upset because she didn't get to go with them. And I don't even remember who it was. But I felt guilty because I was like, if I would have tried to be closer with the moms, then maybe they would have included Stella. Like, you know, and so I'm like feeling like, oh, it's my fault now, you know. Oh, wow. I can't wait for kindergarten.

It's been fun. Anyway, this was fun. This was a good time. Okay, bye. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.