Dear Chelsea - Call Her Daddy with Alex Cooper
Episode Date: January 19, 2023Alex Cooper of the Call Her Daddy podcast joins Chelsea this week to talk about why keeping things offline with her boyfriend of two years has kept her relationship healthy, how her family keeps her g...rounded, and why staying in your lane is a thing of the past. Then: A college girl gets the ick when her boyfriend calls her Mommy. A committed girlfriend struggles with her boyfriend’s overblown sex drive. And a snooping partner discovers evidence of escorts - and it has her rethinking her relationship. * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at DearChelseaPodcast@gmail.com * Executive Producer Nick Stumpf Produced by Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brandon Dickert * * * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees. This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all. Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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People, my people, what's up?
This is Questlove.
Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up
another season of Questlove Supreme.
Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season.
But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far.
I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E., Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more.
Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance.
You gotta check them out.
Listen to Questlove Supreme
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you get your podcasts.
Hi, Catherine.
Hello, Chelsea. We're together.
Oh my God, it's Los Angeles.
It's raining and the whole everything is sliding down the hill.
I love the fucking rain.
And I know it's not safe.
Yeah.
But I fucking love when it rains.
I love it, too.
But like this fourth week, I was like, I'm a little over it.
I'm a little done with this.
I'm not.
But I understand it's not good for Californians and that people are in, obviously, a serious
dangerous situation.
So I obviously don't love the rain.
And if I had to choose to have the rain or not have the rain, I would have to choose to not have the rain.
But then we're in a drought, Chelsea.
I know.
But I just enjoy the sound of the pitter patter.
And I just it's so much moodier.
And it's like cozy.
I love it so much.
It makes me I just, you know.
Anyway.
Hi.
What's happening? What's new?
Well, we got to see all of the gals from Mallorca that we went to. Oh my God. I couldn't go. When
was it? Because I was Friday. Well, I had the critics choice award. So we had rehearsals Friday.
Oh my God. For that. Were you so excited? How did that go? Oh my God. So much fun. It was amazing.
I loved it. I love dressing up like a little Barbie doll. You in that red dress is everything. Yeah. It was actually hot pink. It was like the color
of your hair. Amazing. Well, parts of the color of your hair, like this little strand up here.
Yes. Yeah. It was really fun. We had such a good time, my writers and I, that helped write the
monologue or well, and everybody there. And then we went out after and yeah it was really fun I had a
great night I'm so happy yeah it was fun to do actually good yeah usually I don't like to do
things like that because I'm like oh it's going to be a pain in the ass plus it was interrupting my
you know Christmas right my ski bonanza but you know I just have understood that I'm I'm gonna
have to not I'm gonna have to say yes to work when I yeah when it's snowing I have to learn how to not take four months off yeah maybe well we'll send
you back right yeah yeah I'm going back pretty quick I'm actually marrying my makeup artist from
New York Mia I'm marrying her tomorrow to someone else so to her. And I am the officiant for their wedding.
Good.
She's like, and I'm not sure how that happened exactly.
But she told me this weekend, last week I was in New York doing some press.
She told me that she assumed that I have married a bunch of people already.
And I looked at her and my sister was with us at dinner, Shoshana.
And we both looked at her and thought, have with us at dinner, Shoshana, and we both looked
at her and thought, have you been listening to anything I've ever said? Why would you think that
I marry a lot of people? You know, I can kind of see it as an extension of like, you get a lot of
gay couples engaged at your shows and things, right? Yeah. But like, this is a bigger level of responsibility. So Casey, who is an assistant, he got me officiated online.
Amazing.
And now I'm an officiant.
I can marry people.
So please don't put in requests because it's not happening.
I'm not doing this again.
This is a one-off.
Oh, my gosh.
Are you a reverend?
I don't know.
I'm an officiant.
I'm an officiant.
Yes, I'm a shaman.
I'm a gynecologist.
I'm a shaman. I'm a reverend. A rever I'm a shaman. I'm a gynecologist. I'm a shaman.
I'm a reverend.
A reverend is good.
That's kind of like my speed.
Great.
I mean, I'm just fucking preaching gospel basically all the time, right?
Yes.
So many gospels.
So Chelsea, we recorded this episode with our very fantastic guest a couple of weeks ago.
And you were a little under the weather.
So just so people know, that's. And you were a little under the weather. So just so people
know, that's why your voice sounds a little different. Before I introduce our guest today,
I want to say that I was on a plane. I was flying back from Boston and I smoked a lot of pot because
I was tending to my sister who had surgery and I was being a nurse. And that was stressful for
Chelsea. So she smoked a lot of pot. And then I have a very sensitive throat. So I started coughing and I was like, okay, forget it. Then I had shows on the East Coast. I got on the plane Monday on
JetBlue. Thank God I had my own little cubbyhole area because I deteriorated on that plane ride
like I had full-blown AIDS. I mean, I was shivering. My back was thumping. I was like hacking up a storm.
Of course, I had a mask on because I'm not a Republican.
And I just was like, oh, my God, they may have to ground the plane and take me straight to the emergency room in Dubois or wherever we were flying over.
And I got off the plane, went straight.
My driver drove me straight to my doctor's office.
He goes, don't come inside.
Meet me in the alleyway.
Because he's like, I have to test you for RSV COVID and the flu that's going around. I'm like, I had the flu shot. He goes, it doesn't matter. Everyone's got it. Anyway,
I ended up having the flu. I'm on my fifth day of antibiotics. So I'm no longer infectious,
which is upsetting for me because I wanted to give you something when you got here.
Well, I have something, so I'm going to give it to you.
Okay. What do you have?
I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.
I'm just kidding.
I actually got COVID for the first time the other week.
Oh, you did?
Yeah.
Was that after I saw you at that party?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I got it from you.
You got it from that party.
After you gave me the mushrooms.
No, your friend gave me the mushrooms.
Oh, yeah.
She gave my boyfriend the mushrooms.
Okay.
This is Alexandra Cooper, everybody.
Okay.
You know her from Call Her Daddy, which is the number one podcast in all of the globe. Okay. You know her from Call Her Daddy, which is the number one podcast in all of the
globe. Okay. It's probably more popular than Joe Rogan's podcast. I need to hang out with you more.
And she put herself on the map in a major, major way because you know what's so funny?
The first time I met Alexandra, I didn't know who the fuck she was. And she let me know it.
Yeah. Well, my publicists were like, you have't know who the fuck she was. And she let me know it. Yeah. Well,
my publicists were like, you have to go do Alexandra Cooper's podcast. It's the biggest
podcast in the world. She just got this huge podcast deal. Blah, blah, blah, blah. I go,
sure, whatever. And I go to her house and the whole time she's like, do you even know who I am?
I'm like, well, I mean, no, but stop saying that. Like, I can't lie. I'm not going to pretend.
I was like the awkward girl who was like fangirling that Chelsea Handler was in my house.
And I was stoned.
I had my sunglasses on.
I was like, listen, girl, we don't have time for this fangirl.
Like, let's get down to business.
And then throughout the hour, I was like, oh, okay, I can see why this girl is popular and she's fun.
And then I've been able to watch your success and run into you a few
times and I do really like you thank you thank you I like you too you're in a very very solid
relationship you said the other night when I saw you at the Amphar event for two years right it's
shocking I'm so proud of myself I'm proud of you it's been good because the toxicity was running
through my veins in college and out of college in a New York City like I was just trying to ruin
guys lives and then I got over it and I was, toxic is now actually boring to me because it's
the same thing every time. And then I found healthy and it's good. And how did you find that?
I found that because I feel like I was just ready. Like I wouldn't have been ready if it,
I wouldn't have found healthy if I wasn't healthy. I got into fucking therapy. Well, there's the answer for all of us, right? Yeah. Sometimes you don't want to be in
therapy because you're like, I want to keep spiraling. Like this is better for content.
This is better just for me in general to keep living in the dark. And then I woke up and I was
like, all right, I guess it's time. 28, I want to figure it out. Well, that's good. I mean, listen,
I didn't figure my shit out until I was like 40. But I think when you're an artist or a creative, you think all the bad shit is helpful
for your material. Like I remember doing stand up. And anytime I broke up with somebody is when I was
just crushing it because I could just go off on that relationship. And then you've come to a point
where you're like, well, no one's going to date me anymore. And then you're like, but who gives a
fuck because I don't want to date anybody anyway. then you know you come to grips with the idea that like it's so exhausting to be
in something that requires so much energy you know like yeah you don't need drama or bad shit or
toxicity in your life to create good stuff you can do that it's like when fat comedians lose weight
and they're like well are they still gonna be funny you're like what right what are you talking about right like that's their only bit like you're like you
got funny because you're fat that's not the way it works anyway so tell us a little bit about your
for lack of a better word journey into podcasting into the situation that you're in yeah like how
did everything start to happen for you excuse me oh my Oh, my God. I just got the flu and COVID at the same time.
Chelsea just looked me dead in the eyes.
We made eye contact, and she just burped a cough onto me.
You guys, I have to be completely honest.
I'm wearing a maxi shield right now because I cough.
This cough I have is so bad that I said to my housekeeper,
and we only speak Spanish, I'm like, tenemos maxi shield.
No, you know what she sounds like? It's when you
have like a cough coming
and you're holding your breath in your throat and you're
trying to talk. It's been since I walked
into the room. So why don't I just podcast
you sit over there. You just take a little
break. Have you ever worn a maxi pad?
Yeah, I have. I haven't.
Because it's fucking disgusting.
And every time I was out, I was getting my color done last't and I fuck is it's fucking disgusting and every time I was out I was getting
my color done last night and I coughed so hard and then I got up I was like is that urine dripping
down my leg and I got up luckily they're two gay men so I didn't have to be ashamed and I said you
guys I need you to get me on my pee coat because I can't walk out of the salon like this because
I've urinated all over myself.
And they both looked at each other, got my coat and didn't even say goodbye to me.
They were both like, fuck off, get out of here.
But so now because of this crazy cough, I have to wear a maxi shield because a urine
is just going to come out.
A maxi shield.
Yeah.
It's shielding the rest of the world from my urine.
I wouldn't judge you, but but behind your back, I would.
I'm judging me in front of us, both of us.
At least you're not shitting your pants.
Well, that sounds like it's next.
By the way, did you hear that Putin shat his pants?
Putin fell down the stairs.
Good for you, you fucking asshole.
And then shat his pants.
No.
Yes.
That's so good.
I love stories about people shitting their pants, especially that guy.
It's great.
Okay, so back to you, Alexandra.
Oh, the journey, the journey, the journey.
Yeah.
So, I mean, I can keep it quick.
I was out of college.
I was on unemployment checks trying to figure my shit out.
Which college did you go to?
Boston University.
Oh, I was just in Boston.
Boston's my favorite city.
I love it.
It was so good for college, too.
Yeah.
I feel like New York, you think you would want to go there and then you're like, well,
I don't want to be in college in New York City.
Like what the fuck?
So Boston was perfect because I had all of the colleges and then that's where the professional
athletes came in because they were like all in the city and it was great.
It was just a perfect opportunity for me to really thrive.
But I got out of college and I had this like awful job.
I was in sales and it was for a magazine and print is fucking dying.
So my boss is always like, why can't you sell shit?
I'm like, because who the fuck wants to buy
an advertisement in a magazine?
Like, bitch, this is dinosaur ages.
So I was really unamused by my job, miserable.
And I was just typing up scripts every day,
like wanted to start a YouTube channel,
wanted to do something in the creative field.
My dad's in sports television.
I majored in film and television and then I'm at a ad agency but that's usually how it
goes like you got to get a job you hate and finally i got fired and it was incredible
everyone was crying the day we all got laid off and i was like crying tears of happiness just
because i hated my job so much but i didn't have the balls to leave because i couldn't financially
just be like i'm gonna leave and go like i don't come from a trust fund like I had to have a fucking job
so I'm on unemployment checks and I was gonna start a YouTube channel for my in Boston in in
New York now I'm living in New York and then I wanted to start a YouTube channel call her daddy
was now an idea and I was gonna do it as a YouTube channel and then some people were like you should
do a podcast it's not oversaturated like YouTube right now.
Especially with the way you fucking talk.
I mean, listen to this already.
I never shut the fuck up.
I mean, you should have been born with a fucking podcast.
I literally came out of the womb and like I should have had a microphone in front of me
because I can never stop talking.
My mother's always like, shut the fuck up.
Let your other siblings speak.
Absolutely not.
So then I just started the podcast and I had really no plan. Like there was no
business plan. I didn't know anything about the industry. And after the first episode was uploaded,
Dave Portnoy from Barstool DM'd me and was like, what is this thing? Like, what is going on here?
Like who made this promo? And I was like, oh, I edited it together. Like I edited it myself.
I went to film school and then I went in for a meeting. Dave Portnoy signed me and the show
went like number one on episode four. Wow. And it was wild. And it was like very aggressive start
where I wasn't prepared almost for the success. I understand I'm so lucky. Sometimes you have to
work at something for a very long time. For me, it like it was uploaded and then it was like,
what the fuck do I do now? There was no plan. There was no vision. And so it was like what the fuck do I do now there was no plan there was no vision and so it was kind of like a makeshift moment where every week was just like trying to come
up with a new episode and a new concept and and then it just got big and then I left Barstool
took my IP and went to Spotify it was pretty wild and what how long has that been so I have a three
year deal with Spotify and I'm halfway into my second year so it's been
pretty wild and it's been like a pretty amazing experience and do you have any interest in like
having a talk show oh I don't even know what like it's quite crazy because if you asked me I never
thought I'd be a podcaster like I didn't know that was even a fucking thing back in the day
it'd be like my dad's hobby was to like listen to podcasts and now I'm a
podcaster and so I don't know like I don't know if it'd be a talk show I don't know if it's going
to continue I think I'm just making my show what I want it to be like I'm doing video now that's
not a podcast technically but it is because I want it to be like I'm very stimulated by the
visual aspect audio was never like my passion but it is how I got obviously successful.
Well, it's kind of funny
because it all fucking turns into the same thing anyway.
You know, like podcasting was supposed to be
so it wasn't on the air.
And then all of a sudden you're watching podcasts on YouTube
and you're watching them.
And now it's a TV show.
And you're like, it's like all of media,
you know, all these streaming platforms
are basically turning back into the three major networks
because they're all amalgamating.
You know, Disney buys this, Warner buys this, blah, blah, blah, blah, Viacom buys this.
And we're basically getting right back to where we started.
So we have all these streaming platforms that are now going to put commercials back on.
So they're back to NBC, ABC and CBS.
Like it's all really stupid.
It's like cell phones came out.
They were really small.
Then they got really big and then they got small, and now they're like, what the fuck, you know?
I'm just waiting for them to come up with bundles of streaming services,
and then it's just cable.
Absolutely. You're right. It's a great point.
So tell us about, and then now you're in a normal relationship. I find that hard to believe.
It's very hard to believe. And I know people on the internet would shit talk me like,
he doesn't exist. It's not helping me.. And I know people on the internet would shit talk me like he doesn't exist.
It's not healthy.
I met him.
He exists.
He exists.
Thank you.
Yeah, it's really wild.
I think that the reason it's so normal is because I actually don't fucking know.
I need to like think about this answer.
I guess it's normal because he's very normal.
He grew up in LA.
He's very unaffected by just all of it because he grew up around it and he like has no interest in it. He's in the industry, but he's very normal. He grew up in L.A. He's very unaffected by just all of it because he grew up around it and he has no interest in it.
He's in the industry, but he's very private.
So we keep things offline, which I think is nice because my relationship is not predicated on what other people think about us. And I'm not like making decisions because I'm seeing comments or I'm not using it to monetize my business.
It's a real relationship.
And so if I don't like him, I don't like him.
If I like him, I like him.
It's not going to be based off of something I see on social media.
And I don't even give a shit if you have a platform.
When people have 100 followers and you're posting your partner,
it is affected.
You know what I mean?
How many comments did we get?
We didn't get as many likes on that.
People are saying, he's so hot.
Are they going to DM him?
Or he's so ugly.
Should I dump him? Or he's so ugly.
Should I dump him?
Like there's too much stimulation going on.
And so I think the crux of why it's healthy is because it's as normal as I could humanly possibly make it.
And the only people that are influencing my relationship is me and him.
I like that.
Yeah.
And what would you say?
I mean, I'm going to ask you probably a hard question to answer, but I think you probably
can because you seem to have a good, strong sense of yourself, which I think is really admirable.
And I wish all women would have, especially in their 20s.
What would you accredit your success and value in this podcast space?
What are your attributes that have gotten you here and why do you think you're so good at it?
Thank you, First of all, I mean, I think I feel like I was very fortunate to be raised with a pretty like normal, stable family, which I're gonna go to college no we're not gonna go to auditions for you to be an actress like no
so they were making sure that I was not getting ahead of myself and that I was like focusing on
what mattered which was in their minds like education and having a normal life and being
a good person and making me go to church every fucking Sunday and it was just a very I grew up
in Pennsylvania and so I feel like my parents instilled the values of just like
not getting affected by all the bullshit because they didn't let me do certain things when I wanted
to do it on top of that I think sports honestly was like a huge help towards me having this drive
and grit and tenacity and also like the amount of people that say shit about me on the internet
I don't know why it doesn't affect me as much as maybe it would other creators.
I think because of the absolute annihilation I received at playing Division I soccer.
It was like the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.
And getting basically like verbally abused every single day by a coach and teammates and the whole thing.
Like it just made me a very strong person.
So when I came into this industry,
I'm very passionate about what I do.
I think is like why I'm able to stay grounded.
I'm not doing it for wrong reasons.
I'm not doing it for fame and money.
Like I'm driven by the fact that like
I've been obsessed with creating since such a young age
and then just having support from my family
and like them literally hip checking me every day.
I'm like, no, you sound fucking insane. Like know that you're being a brat and I'm like I am so I I'm fortunate I I credit
it really to my family so you grew up in Pennsylvania and how many siblings do you have
two I'm the youngest okay I'm the youngest two do you have a boy and a girl yep okay oldest sister
and then middle brother and I also like that because you made an announcement last year you
were talking about becoming more politically active and taking a stand for things that you believe in. And I think
with somebody with the size platform you have, I think the thing that kind of bugs me is when people,
young people don't don't do that. It irks me because we you know, you have so much influence
and so much power. So I just love that you're standing up for things and, you know, for human
rights and for basic things that we should all be standing up for.
And it's not necessarily political to stand up for human rights. It's kind of necessary. So that's
also another great thing. So on this podcast, we give advice to real people who call in.
You know a little bit about that. I'm excited. I love giving advice.
So do I. I fucking can't get enough of it. I'm just like, I overheard a conversation the other day.
I'm like, can I just chime in here?
Okay.
I was like, you're not making any sense right now.
And you're not helping her.
I'll help you.
And you get out of this conversation.
I was at the airport lounge.
Incredible.
I know.
Well, we'll take a quick break.
And we'll be right back with Alex Cooper and Chelsea.
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Inside you, two wolves are locked in battle. One thrives on fear and anger and doubt.
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You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show,
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and very fun. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever
you get your podcasts. And we're back. Great. Well, our first email comes from Bella. She's 18.
She's a student. The subject line is, please help. He calls me mom and can't get it up.
Dear Chelsea, I'm 18 and in college and going out with this cool guy. For now, things aren't
that serious, but we do drop the L-bomb here and there.
My problem is, sometimes he says, I love you, mom, or just accidentally calls me mom.
What the hell am I supposed to think about that? I know it's subconscious, and he can't help it,
but it weirds me out. He has a really close relationship with his mom after his parents
got divorced, but the fact that he calls his partner that on accident is strange, right?
First of all, it's by accident.
It's not on accident.
Stop saying that, everybody.
Things happen by accident.
Nothing is on an accident.
Or am I overreacting, she says.
Am I overreacting?
Yes, to fucking bad grammar.
I fucking can't take it.
In addition, he also has this problem with getting
it up, and he's 18 too. I don't judge him, and I've always made it clear that when it's us,
he's safe and in a safe space, but he seems young to be facing this type of issue, right?
I can't help but overthink it. He smokes a shit ton of weed on a daily basis, so maybe that's a
contributor, but this entire situation makes me feel unattractive, even though all my friends
tell me it's not my fault.
Kindly, Bella.
Would you like to take this from the top?
I'll take this.
Number one, you're 18 years old and all I heard was you feel unattractive and this guy is calling you his mom.
Get the fuck out.
I don't.
I feel like when you're at that point in your life, if there's any doubt in your mind that something's off, leave.
You're too young.
You have too much to do. You have so many opportunities. It's so leave you're too young you've too much to do you've so
many opportunities it's so fucking weird he's calling you his mom sorry to anyone that refers
to their partner as their mother he either wants to fuck his mom there's something weird that went
on like i don't know i just don't think that's for you to uncover i think it's time for you to
pack your stuff find someone that makes you feel attractive and don't be called someone's mom when you're trying to fuck them.
And unfortunately, you can't even fuck him because he can't get hard.
We don't even need to judge him on that.
But you want to have some good sex in college.
Like, let's find someone that can fuck and doesn't refer to you as mommy.
Yeah, there's plenty of guys you can fuck that won't get it up, that won't call you mom.
You know?
I mean, first of all, Bella, get out of there.
This is a waste of your time.
This is your prime, prime learning to have sex time in your life.
This is where you lay the foundation of what you like, what you don't like, and you don't like this.
He's not getting it up.
Calling your mom is fucking weird.
And you just, exactly what Alexander, you just said that you don't feel attractive.
That's it.
You're done.
Done.
Goodbye.
Bye. Find somebody who makes you feel hot. That's it. You're done. Done. Goodbye. Bye.
Find somebody who makes you feel hot.
Yes.
And that can fuck you.
Yes.
I remember being a kid and like once a year I would accidentally call a teacher mom.
That ended in sixth grade.
He shouldn't be 18 and still calling his girlfriend.
But a teacher is different because they're an authoritative figure.
They're helping you learn.
They're giving you an education.
Although teachers, whatever.
The point is, your teacher's not fucking you,
hopefully. And I do feel as though
there's nothing beneficial in this relationship.
You're not getting fucked and you're his
mommy. You're not a mom
yet. You know what I mean? Those days may come
at one point. Leave them for later on.
And for your children.
And it's not your job to fix him.
No, no, no, no.
Learn.
Yeah.
Nip that in the bud, because listen, if you don't learn this lesson now, unfortunately,
you'll have to learn it over and over again.
So let this be the first and the last time.
Yes.
Well, our next question comes from Rochelle, who is maybe one of the most angelic, sweet
people I've ever talked to.
She's 22 and she has kind of the opposite question.
Dear Chelsea, I hope all is
well. I'm here reaching out for advice on my boyfriend and I's sex life. My boyfriend and my
sex life. My boyfriend and my sex life. Yes. We're both 22 years old and have been together for four
years now. Last year we lived together in Philly for over a year. It was amazing. We both moved
back home to our parents so we could save some money and eventually move to a better location. We live a couple hours apart. Our
dilemma has been how horny he often gets and the many times a day he attempts to initiate sex.
Yes, I'm aware this is not the worst problem to have. I've enjoyed our time apart because of this.
I want so badly to live with him, but the thought of once again being asked for sex every day infuriates me.
It makes me feel like I'm just a bunch of holes.
I thought his sex drive would lower after some time, but it's been four years.
We're planning our life together, and sometimes all I can dream about is the happiness I'll feel when we get old and he gets ED.
We spoke to a therapist about this a couple months ago and she mentioned giving me
space to initiate it myself. However, I found that my sex drive seems to be much lower and he does
not have the patience to wait for me to initiate. This makes me feel like a shitty girlfriend for
not wanting sex as much as he does, but I also feel like I'm dealing with a desperate 16-year-old.
This is our biggest issue in our relationship. We've communicated so much and tried so many different things.
It's the only thing that makes me wonder if we should actually be together and pursue a life with one another.
If we got married someday, isn't this something that could kill a marriage?
Thank you for reading, Rochelle.
Okay, first of all, can he go fuck Bella?
Because Bella needs to get fucked, and this guy's got extra juice going, right?
This is great for Bella. We had a previous caller before you.
And her boyfriend can't get it up and calls her mom.
So maybe we could just do a swap.
I think that could solve the problem.
Wait, is this the person who was just asking the question?
Yes, this is Rasha.
Oh, who do you think this is?
This is my mother.
I've never been on this show.
You didn't explain the format, you little bitches.
Mother Cooper.
Hi, ladies. It's a pleasure to. Mother Cooper. Ah, I love it.
Hi, ladies.
It's a pleasure to meet you all.
Oh, my gosh.
How cute is that?
I'm so sorry for your predicament.
Thank you.
Do you want some advice?
Yeah.
Should I go first?
Sure, go for it.
Okay, so I think this is the classic, which I think is like, this will make you feel better.
No one has the same sex drive in a relationship.
And this is like a very common issue where two
people are on a different page with their sex life the issue is the person that wants sex more
is made to feel like the needy one is made to feel like i want you all the time and feels rejected
because the person that doesn't have as high as a sex drive is rejecting them you however are like
my vagina is gonna fall off if we have sex one more goddamn time please go jack off in
the bathroom so I think it all comes down in my opinion to communication I don't feel like you
should be having sex in moments that you're not turned on and you're not in the mood and you're
just doing it to appease him but I also understand on his is his point of view is like I'm attracted
to my partner I want to have sex with my girlfriend. So I would actually set a time. It's not after sex. It's not before sex. It's at dinner. It's
at breakfast. It's at lunch. And you actually have a sit down conversation and you start with
a compliment of how much you appreciate the relationship you have and all the things you
love about it. But then with regard to your sex life, you come from the point of view of saying,
hey, I'm really struggling
because when we have sex, I love it. I'm having great sex with you. Like there is no denying
the dick game's great. But I think that for me, there's just certain things where I'm maybe not
in the mood and you are. And I want to just find a happy medium so that you feel satisfied and I
feel satisfied because it's not fair to you.
And if your partner is like, I can't do that.
I'm sorry.
Then maybe this is someone that has a lack of respect in a greater aspect that it's outside
of the bedroom.
That's a problem.
If you're telling your partner that you're not enjoying something and they want to continue
to do it, that's selfish.
So hopefully your partner's like, okay, babe, how can we work on this?
And it's almost like you start like a regimen of every time that we want to have sex, I
get to initiate once a week and you get to initiate once a week.
And like, let's start with that and then go from there.
But I think it's actually like building in, which sounds kind of corny, but almost a communication
that allows you to tell him how you're feeling and then tell him you don't get the opportunity
to initiate
because he's always fucking a horny little dog so on weekends we're not having sex unless i
initiate it and then hopefully you get in the mood and you're like wait what so it's like you can pick
two days a week we're gonna have sex during the week but on the weekends it's my time or like
come up with a rhythm i i don't know i I like that idea because I understand I can totally relate
to being felt like
you're being attacked
all the time sexually
when a guy's on you
and they want to have sex
all the time
and you're like,
give me some space
to come to you.
If I could hit on you
and initiate,
that would be sexier for me
than constantly feel like
if I take my shirt off
in front of you,
I'm going to get pummeled.
I understand
where you're coming from.
I also think Alex's advice is good and you should start with that. But I think it is a big issue if you don't
resolve it now because you do not want to just be spending your life avoiding your partner and
avoiding sex. I mean, like a sex therapist, someone you can sit down with and actually
have an honest, open conversation so that this is a more even playing field because you're just going to play the avoidance game. You're going to try and be
asleep before he gets in the room. You're going to do all of the things. And wear cute PJs.
Yeah, exactly. And I agree with you, Chelsea, because I feel like what happens is you're going
to start to resent him for something that could actually be managed. And so I think what it really
comes down to is you need to figure out how many times a week would you want to have sex? And then you need to go from there of
like, if you number one are enjoying your sex life, that's great. Also, you don't have to tell
us, but like, if you're not, that's also another whole thing. When you're having sex, if he's
actually pleasuring you also, how is the sex? Like, is he doing any foreplay? Are you having
an orgasm when you're actually having sex? Like like is it just about him going to pound town and then like splooging in four seconds and you're like
well that wasn't fun like i think you need to look inward and figure out what ways are you being
pleasured in the actual moment and also is it at all exciting is it like now just a chore if it's
just a chore i agree you got you we got to switch it up and you have to talk to him about it. Honestly, tell him to masturbate. Like jack off four times a week.
Been there. His quote now is like, is this for two or for one? There was a period when I was
like, hey, if you feel that you need to, and I clearly am doing my own thing, just go. And he'll
be like, is this for two or for one? And I actually thought that was sweet. And sometimes I'd say for
two, yes, definitely have tried that for sure. It kind of worked for a while.
Okay. And do you enjoy the sex when you have it?
Yes. But that's, I think that's actually what led to him maybe taking different approaches in the
same evening, let's say, because he knows that it's always the best time. And I, you know,
afterwards you're so goo goo gaga. And I have been in the spot where
I almost felt bad, like, why didn't I want to do this when I end up enjoying it so much. But it's
because prior, I don't really feel that I need it, you know, but afterwards, I'm like, why wouldn't
you you're in love with this man, it's the best time he knows what you like. I'm kind of fighting
myself here. And then he's like, trying all these different ways. I don't know. I think that when you're talking about this,
it makes me think that you have to hold strong for yourself in moments. Of course, maybe you're
going to enjoy it in the moment, but it started out with you were not in the mood. You did not
want to have sex. And so I think that what you can do, even though it may be very unsexy, like
if it's a Monday, you had a hard day of work, whatever reason it is, you should literally say, babe,
I'm going to be honest, not in the mood today, not in the mood. And so when he tries to pressure you
and be like, come on, like whatever, just be like, Hey, not today, maybe tomorrow. So it's almost
like say no. And then whether you have to literally remove yourself and move to the other side of the
fucking couch or the bed. But I think it it's it's starting with yourself and creating boundaries for yourself that will
allow you then to feel better about your decision when you actually do have sex because it was on
your turf right now it's all on his time and he's just kind of pushing to see if you'll you'll be
down and i think if you start saying absolutely not like not in the mood love you nothing wrong
with you just not in the mood not tonight maybe. Nothing wrong with you. Just not in the mood. Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow.
I think it will allow you to feel better that you actually stopped it instead of it being
like this wishwashy in between of like, maybe it'll happen tonight if I like get her in
the mood enough.
Like just create a hard line.
Yeah.
And explain it to him in terms that he can understand that it's not so much fun to be
chased all the time.
You sometimes want to be the initiator. And he's going
to respect that. And he's going to like that. I mean, how sexy is it if he gives you enough space
that you are the one initiating, going and sitting on his lap at night and being like all over him,
like, let's go. He's going to love that. What if you literally do this? What if you say
whoever initiated last can't initiate next? Oh, I love that. And you know what I did last weekend?
I told him, I was like, Hey, can you, if when I'm going to initiate, can you just tell me like,
Hey babe, not right now. Can you give me a couple minutes? Like I want it to feel like just cause
I initiated, he didn't bounce. And when I tell you that got me hot and bothered, he was like,
can you wait a moment? I was like there you go okay so i think that's
it it's you literally almost implement a game so it's like sorry hot and fun oh my god i'm getting
her i'm sorry i'm getting her she has monkey pox she came in here today with monkey pox i told her
do not do that and she has no respect for anybody i think this is it i think this is it you like the
game you want the chase you want to feel like you sometimes can be in control. I think that's the end of it is that you have an initiating game. Whoever initiated last
now can initiate. I'm obsessed. I love it. I think that's amazing. Listen to Father Cooper
preaching. Slay it. You're going to be great. Yeah, this is good. This is good. One thing that
I'll say as well, like looking farther down the road,
because you know, you've been with this guy for four years, you love him, you're looking for a
future with him. I don't think it's something that will destroy your marriage. If you guys
get married one day, I've been in a long marriage, we have had fluctuating like who wants it more
when I used to be the one who wanted it way more than he did. And I would get super butt hurt when
he didn't want it, when I wanted it.
So like I get that perspective as well.
But, you know, and it's like you're always being chased down.
I will say as you get closer to your 30s and he does as well, you may find that like his
levels come down a little bit and yours go up and you meet kind of in the middle because,
you know.
Yeah, there's something for you to look forward to.
Yeah.
No, you guys just, yeah, you gave me something to look forward to. And I know he,
even just the idea that that could be a potential, he will love that. I'm like, give me time. Don't worry. Yeah. Your thirties will be great for sex. I promise. That's awesome. Thank you.
Well, thanks so much. Good luck. Oh my God. Thank you so much. I can't wait to talk to him about this tonight.
You're so cute.
I love it.
Bye.
Bye.
She's the cutest person you've ever laid your eyes on.
Yeah, that was really good advice.
Yeah, that was great, guys.
That was so perfect.
Way to go.
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It's called Really No Really, and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, where I run with celebrities, athletes,
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It's where we take the conversation beyond the run and get into the heart of it all it's
light-hearted pretty crazy and very fun listen to post run high on the iheart radio app apple
podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts well our next caller is sandra sandra bullock sandra
sandy imagine she's usually very private. So you guys,
let's keep this one under wraps. She says, Dear Chelsea, I'm a 30-year-old female and I've been
dating my 45-year-old boyfriend for almost a year. I recently found out that he has visited escorts
in the not so distant past. I found this out because I looked at his text messages. I know
this isn't a good habit and I'm likely just looking for ways to feel betrayed, but I'm working on this with my therapist. I've looked once before and was
honest with him about it, and it definitely affected our trust with each other. Our trust
has since recovered, I guess, until I chose to look again. This time, I found text messages of
him making appointments to hire an escort, and I should mention this is before they were together.
He was also specifically asking for certain women, so I think that it was not a one-time thing. The most recent text was
seven months before we started dating. A little context. He's a divorced man who was married for
13 years and says that they would go years at a time without having sex. And this was a big factor
in their separation. He also disclosed to me in the first month we were dating that he had cheated on his ex-wife with a stripper while he was really drunk. He said he told his ex-wife
right away and felt horrible and thought I should know up front. He's now been divorced for three
years, but when he hired these most recent escorts, he was in and out of casual and more serious
relationships, so I don't think it was out of a lack of intimacy like he'd previously felt in his
marriage. He's also sober now, so he can't blame being a drunk either.
Our relationship has honestly been great.
So far, any hard conversation we've had has made us stronger,
and he's been a loving and supportive partner.
Now, I don't know what I should do with this information or even how to feel about it.
I worried that there are some fucked up power dynamics involved
and why he chose to sleep with those escorts,
but I also recognize it was in his past before me. And I found out this information by
looking through his things. Update from Sandra. Her boyfriend is soon going to be visiting Thailand.
So there's some time sensitivity here. Hi, Sandra. Hey. Hi, guys. How are you?
Hi. Good. Good. How are you doing? Pretty good.
This is a deep one. I think reading that, I feel a couple things.
I think, number one, you can find some solace in the fact that everything you found predated your relationship.
I actually appreciated that you also noted that he had told his ex-wife immediately after something had happened. So it feels like the first step is that he has no issue being very open and honest in communication,
even if it means he fucked up.
So we're already operating on a good playing field because when you have a compulsive liar
or someone that's going to constantly be hiding things, that's where it gets really tricky.
The issue is, is if he was doing this in his past,
there's no saying that he wasn't going
to be doing it now in your relationship.
And the issue, again, is that you found this by snooping.
And so you can't be like, hey, like I found this.
I'm wondering if you're doing it to me because then he can be like, you invaded my privacy
and I have never done that with you because we're in a committed relationship.
So I see why you're kind of in a pickle. I think what it comes down to is if you can't trust your partner,
you have a huge issue. And I don't know if I would personally be in a relationship where I
constantly was wondering and stressing out. I've been in those relationships. So I think that if I
were you, I would nip it in the butt so that you're not wasting time and you may have to throw yourself
under the bus a little bit. Because wait, let me actually ask you, how did you know he told
his ex-wife? He told me. Perfect. Yeah. First month that we were dating, he immediately told
me that information without me having to ask. Perfect. I did actually, because I had said in
my letter that I have trouble keeping anything inside. I'm very easy
to read. He would know something was wrong. I told him two days ago that I looked through his stuff
because he's currently in Thailand right now. And what did he say? He basically said, I mean,
I didn't really ask all the questions that I feel like maybe I wanted to because I wasn't really
sure even what my questions were
because I don't know how I'm feeling about it. But he just said, yes, he had done that in the past
before me. And he just wishes that I hadn't looked through his stuff and that he hopes that it
doesn't change my perception of him. But I didn't ask too much more. He didn't give any opinions or feelings or
have you done this in previous relationships? Look through your partner's phone?
Not No, not really. I mean, I guess I had before in my last serious relationship.
And that's where I think a lot of these trust issues came from, too. He struggles with drug addiction.
So there was also a lot of that, too, where I was trying to see, like, is he lying to me about currently using, too?
So it was its whole other, like, monster in itself.
Yeah, but our biggest mistakes are bringing our old relationships into our new relationships.
Because there's always going to be somebody that did something disrespectful or they lied or they cheated or whatever they did.
But it is your job as part of your evolutionary growth
into becoming more of the person that you're meant to become
is to stop those patterns.
You looking through his phone has garnered you no knowledge at all
because he volunteered some of this information to you.
The fact that he went and got escorts, who gives a shit?
He's a single guy.
He's allowed to do whatever the fuck he wants.
Those are sex workers.
That doesn't have any impact on your relationship.
I would really beseech you
to not look through your partner's phone
unless you have a real fucking reason.
It is a very toxic thing to do
and it will completely disassemble a relationship
when you do that,
because you're going to find something to bring up. You're going to find something.
And without that trust, it's almost like you have no foundation when you pick up someone else's
phone to look through their stuff, you know, without a real reason, without something really
concrete to go, wait a second, something fishy is happening here. You know, it's none of your
business what's in his phone. It's not.
And in order to have a real loving relationship, there has to be respect and trust.
And you have to stop doing that.
I agree.
And I think, listen, you can't go back.
So let's just stay.
You went through his phone.
And I think clearly whether it was from your past relationship, that's why you did it because
you have trust issues.
Or you also had a weird feeling about your partner now.
Number one, that's an indicator
you're not in a healthy relationship
if you don't trust your partner.
But let's say now, okay, you look through the phone,
you brought it up to him.
My advice would be that you have a follow-up phone call,
like FaceTime him and be like,
hey, I've been thinking and I want to first apologize
because I feel really shitty that I went through your phone.
And I will admit part of that is on me and my baggage and my trust issues of I did that in a
past relationship and I found shit that I didn't want to see. And so it almost like reinforced that
I should look through because I'm going to find the hurt and I'm going to find out the truth that
you're lying to me. What I want to say is this. I want this relationship to work and I want to better myself and I want to be honest with you. I promise to never look through your stuff
again. I think all I can ask though from you, because it did make me a little insecure to see
what you've maybe done in the past, that if you're having any type of feelings or desires or your
feelings, like anything, just talk to me because I would rather you be
honest with me than me regret now trusting you and telling you I'm not going to ever look through
your stuff again. And then you go and cheat. So I think if we can just have an open communication,
but I'll be honest, it made me insecure and I want to own it because I hate how I'm feeling
right now. And I just want to tell you that I think he'll really respect that you're owning
your shit, but you're owning your shit
but you're also asking like hey meet me a little bit in the middle because i've got some trust
issues and i want this to work but i also don't want to feel now like i'm gonna get fucked over
for trusting you and hopefully if it's a good relationship he'll reassure you and be like i
haven't done this because i'm in love with you and I don't need an escort right
now because I'm with you. And so I think hopefully you'll get the answer you want. But I will say
if he doesn't give you a reassuring answer and he's like, yeah, sure, I get like then you also
have to look internally of what do you need in a relationship to feel fulfilled? And maybe he
doesn't have the same type of attachment styles, et cetera, to make you feel secure in a relationship.
Yeah. And this guy went out of his way, you know, a month in when you guys are just getting to know each other to like spill all his shit to you. Like he was super upfront with that stuff. So like
this isn't even the guy I think you need to be looking at his phone, right? Like he's giving
it all to you already. Something that might help shift your perspective a little bit on just like
maybe feeling kind of weird about like he's hired sex workers. Private Parts Unknown is a podcast
and they did an episode. It's two women who host it. And they did an episode where they were out
of the country somewhere where it's legal. And they visited masseurs who did happy endings.
They both got happy endings. They had gotten like approval from their partners to do this.
And it really shifted my perspective on like what that experience is really like.
But it might be worth a listen just to help you sort of.
Give you some clarity.
Yeah.
Good advice.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Because that's definitely I'm happy with the direction that the call went, that it's keeping
myself in check and and looking like inward at the mistakes I've made in this. But that's definitely
also one of the reasons I had written into is just my general feelings and confusion over how
I'm feeling. And I've definitely been trying to do more research into it and ask people who have
maybe experienced this before and how they chose to see it. I think, listen, I think it really does come down
to insecurity. And I can relate. It's almost the same as when you see the current boyfriend you
have or your partner or whoever, you see their ex and you're like comparing yourself and you're
stressing out and, oh my God, am I not enough? And am I as good in the bedroom? All that stuff.
You have to find a lot of this could be fixed by you actually focusing on yourself and taking the focus off of him work on yourself are you insecure about yourself what do you think is triggering you
so much about this and that actually should give you some power back of like if you feel good if
you are reading the signs correctly if you are not being shady if you're being honest in this
relationship and you feel like it's being given back to you that's all you have to worry. And then your own baggage you should deal with on the side and not let it affect your
new relationship. Yeah, totally. Thank you. All right. No more looking through his phone. No,
no, no, no, no. It's a bad habit. I need to stop. Yeah. I'll call him probably. And also I'm going
to Thailand with him in a week.
Oh, great.
I'm hoping, yeah, some good conversations there.
Yeah, good conversations.
Give him the benefit of the doubt.
And also when you operate on like a higher level of existence
by not reducing yourself to going through his phone,
you're going to get a different energetic reaction from him as well.
It's not hot when somebody's paranoid.
That's not sexy.
Totally. Yeah. You got a good dude. So let us know how it goes. And if you have a deeper
conversation with him and maybe this can lead to. And maybe you can enjoy your own escort in
Thailand. Exactly. Happy ending. I know. Honestly, I started like looking at,
I just wanted to look at profiles online. Keep an open mind. Maybe you guys can thruple up.
I'm like, who's doing this?
And who are these people available?
The world is your oyster.
All right.
Thanks, Sandra.
I'll talk to you soon.
Bye, guys.
Bye.
Bye.
She's going to enjoy her happy ending massage in Thailand.
I might just go to Thailand for that massage because I wouldn't mind.
I mean, I once had a friend who told us some masseuse said Bacara went down on her.
And I was like, what?
I'm like, that happens to women?
And she's like, yeah, yeah.
All of a sudden he was just like fiddling with me.
And then he asked if it was okay for him to go down on me.
And I was like, I want that masseur.
I'm open to any sort of that kind of action during a massage.
If you want to go down on me, I have no fucking problem with that.
FYI, for all the masseuses that are out here.
PSA.
PSA.
A masseuse PSA.
Well, our last question comes from A.
She says, Dear Chelsea, I need your help finding the right way to exit a group chat.
This chat consists of nine of my college friends.
We're now in our mid
30s. The chat started a few years ago and used to be fun, but has devolved into mostly a few people
going back and forth about their own personal circumstances. What one husband did that's
annoying, what one person's kid made at camp, or what kind of cosmetics someone tried out.
There's never anything substantial or frankly interesting. I should add that I don't think
I've been personally addressed in the chat for at least a year.
Most of the banter that takes place will happen in the middle of the workday,
and I work full-time, so the messages are very disruptive.
I muted it a long time ago, but of course when I open my messages and see there's 89 unread texts,
I either feel guilty or mean by clicking open and just clear the inbox,
or I end up reading the messages out of guilt and regret doing so once I've wasted my time
and brain space to do so.
I'm currently only close with one girl in the chat.
By the way, she hates it too.
I really want to leave the chat.
No one will miss my presence
because I barely reply as it is,
but I know that by leaving, it comes off as rude and mean.
How do I do this?
I don't dislike anyone and I don't want to offend anyone.
Thanks, A. Oh? I don't dislike anyone and I don't want to offend anyone. Thanks,
A. Oh, I don't know. I would say I was going to say mute them, but then you have still have it in your inbox. I think when you have something that's annoying you in your life and the fact
that you said no one's going to miss you, leave that shit. And the fact that you also had the one
person that you care about also hates it.
The two of you leave together.
Be like five, six, seven, eight.
Press the button and get the fuck out of there.
I just feel like when you get to a certain point in your life, especially if you're not in college and you're surrounded by like groups of people that you have to see every day.
If something is not making you happy and it's annoying you and it actually makes you feel worse about yourself.
Goodbye.
Yeah. And you can also just preface it if you really want to like feel good about it being
like, hey guys, I'm sorry. I'm going to exit this chat now. I have so much work to do during the
day. It's become kind of a distraction. Just make up some bullshit if you don't want to just say
so-and-so, you know, because it comes up so-and-so exited the group. For my personal experience,
I've exited so many groups and just said, I'm leaving now.
Goodbye. Without any explanation. And I have to tell you, it is an onus off your back. I don't
want to deal with all that shit. So, I mean, you should just get out of it. And if you want to do
it nicely, do it nicely. And if you want to just leave it, leave it. Who cares? It's not a huge
life decision. Just make your life a little bit more more simpler I also think that if you're feeling this
way a lot of people in that group chat are feeling this way the fact that it's been lingering for
years yeah and people are like it's like dusty comments of like hey guys like got back from
walking the kid and like me and my husband haven't had sex in three months like any like
get the fuck out of here just I think you should leave her I agree just like leave a little note
like super busy wish you all the best like love you guys yes yes talk soon yeah yep yep this line Get the fuck out of here. I think you should leave her. I agree. Just leave a little note. Super busy.
Wish you all the best.
Love you guys.
Talk soon. Love you.
Mean it.
Bye.
Yep.
This line is for work calls.
Love you.
Bye.
Peace.
That's it.
And then your other friend can leave and the other six girls who are not the three girls
who keep texting can leave as well.
Totally.
Well, there you go, eh?
Is Alexandra not your full name?
It is Alexandra.
It would be so funny if it wasn't and I just kept calling you Alexandra.
No, it is.
Okay, we're going to take a quick break, and we'll be right back.
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You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show,
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Listen to post run high on the I heart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back.
All right.
Well, we're here to wrap up, but Alex, do you have any advice you'd like from Chelsea?
Oh, my gosh.
I actually think we can expand a little bit on, I know you started Chelsea lately, and
it was gossip and celebrities and obviously comedy. And then as
your career progressed, you started getting vocal about things that mattered and that you cared
about. And I can assume that there were some people probably that were like, stay in your lane,
bitch, just make us laugh and shut the fuck up. I love how I like say that so casually. I'm like,
that's the exact quotes that I've been getting lately. How did you handle that? And like, did it,
did it, do you think it affected your career in any way?
Well, when I got really political, yeah, I'm sure it had a negative impact on my career because people, I was, when Trump got elected, I just could not, I was just at my, I just
lost it.
Like, I mean, I was so angry that this country could elect such a buffoon that I couldn't
deal with it.
And I'm sure that it did have a negative impact on my career
because my manager told me, you're ruining your career.
But I didn't care because, you know, I believe in myself
and I knew that this was more important to me.
That was the most paramount thing.
People still say that to me today.
People still say, oh, you used to be funny before you got into politics.
It's like, bitch, I have a special coming out on December 27th.
It's fucking, and I just got nominated
for a Grammy for my last special.
So I'm still fucking funny, asshole.
I actually am multidimensional
and I can care about a million different things
at the same time.
And I would challenge you to do the fucking same thing.
Instead of thinking that people are here for one purpose
and one purpose only,
we have a multitude of things to offer
and everybody's multidimensional.
And whenever I see comments like that now, it just makes me want to be louder about the things. Negative comments
about me are irrelevant. They're just irrelevant. I've spent too much time in the public eye to let
that affect me. I'm not here for the people that don't like me. I'm here for the people that do.
I love that because I obviously look up to
you so much and I have been obviously lightly stepping into just talking about things that
matter. My first thing was literally human rights and everyone's like, what the fuck,
you little slut? You're getting political. Tell us how to fuck a dick. And I'm like,
oh my God, like relax. It's so frustrating to see how angry people get when you step out of
your lane and it doesn't fully bother me, but it's more just frustrating to see how close minded people are and how unable they are to listen to something that actually will fucking affect them.
Like the amount of women that were like, why are you getting political?
I'm like, do you not want to have an abortion if you don't want the baby?
Like what are we up to over here, ladies?
It's also such bullshit to be like, that's your lane.
Your lane is you only get to talk about sex stuff.
You only get to talk about whatever.
I don't like that term, your lane.
No one has one lane.
That's so limiting.
We're not here for one lane.
Right, we're swerving.
Yeah, yeah, we're swerving.
Some of us are on the shoulder.
Some of us are getting pulled over.
You know, we have so many lanes.
And that, I feel like, is limiting too.
I remember Dax and Kristen, we were talking about that
because Dax is like, just stay in your lane.
And I could understand the validity of that
because she was comparing herself to other actresses
who were getting different opportunities.
But at the same time, I'm like, well, no, that's limiting.
None of us have one lane.
We all have things to offer.
And let people, it's important to care about other people than yourself.
Yeah.
And I think when you're outspoken about anything political or anything that's happening in society, you are.
I feel very responsible and like it's mandatory.
I feel that way.
So preach.
Yeah.
I just don't.
Yeah.
Well, Father Cooper, you did a great job today.
I mean, you are a real solid addition to this podcast.
Yeah. Guys, have me back.
I mean, yeah. We're going to call you when we have a cancellation and we're just going to come over to your house.
Are you still living in that house that I came to visit you?
I moved. I moved.
Yeah, good. I'm glad.
No, you came when I had nothing.
She didn't even have a parking spot. I was like, do you have a driveway? She's like, not really. I'm like, what?
I had nothing. I was mortified.
And you had to sit on the couch and you couldn't get comfortable and you were wearing a dress.
The whole thing.
No, I have a different place now.
You should come over.
You should come on Call Her Daddy.
Let's do it.
Let's do it.
That would be so fun.
Everyone loves you when you came on.
It was amazing.
Oh, well, this will be an even better interview now that I know who you are.
You won't show up high or you will.
Fuck you.
We'll get high together.
We'll get high together
we should do an episode just getting high
yeah let's do it I love it
thank you Alex Cooper
we love you
thanks Catherine
don't forget to watch my special on Netflix
you guys Revolution
it's a revolution
so if you'd like advice from Chelsea
just send us an email at
dearchelseapodcast
at gmail.com. Dear Chelsea is a production of iHeartRadio, executive produced by Nick Stumpf,
produced by Catherine Law, and edited and engineered by Brad Dickert.
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People, my people, what's up?
This is Questlove.
Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme.
Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season.
But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E., Jonathan Sheckner, Billy Porter, and so many more.
Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance.
You've got to check them out.
Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.