Dear Chelsea - Can You Spell Shenis? with TS Madison

Episode Date: June 25, 2026

The indomitable TS Madison joins Chelsea to discuss the voice that told her she’d be friends with RuPaul, what it means to be a woman, and why she remains well-endowed.  Then: A caller learns that you f*ck young, date rich.  And a childfree woman can’t shake the guys who *might* want kids.   * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brad Dickert * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Listen to Deep Cover the Family Man on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. June is Black Music Month, and on the Drink Chams podcast, we're speaking with the hottest names in the culture, like Sway Lee. Do you realize how legendary you are?

I appreciate that. I'd be seeing it, but I'm like, man, I still got, like, so much more to do. Like, Prince, he dropped, like, 30 albums. We dropped, like, five right now. That's the rate we got to be going. doing. Yep, that's a good attitude. No matter the era, Drink Chams brings you the biggest names and the most unfiltered

conversations. Listen to Drink Chams from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Okay, guys, here are my dates for the High and Mighty Tour. In June, I will be in Hyannis, Massachusetts, and then two shows in Nantucket. In August, you can find me in Red Bank, New Jersey, Montclair, New Jersey, and Calgary. That's K. Canada. And September, I will be in Santa Barbara, San Diego, New York City, Philly, and New Haven, Connecticut. October is Atlanta, Baltimore, Saginaw, Michigan, Pittsburgh, Toronto, Boise, Idaho, and Spokane. And then in November, I'll be in San Francisco. I'm coming to Salt Lake City, Austin, Houston,

Dallas, babies, I'll be there. And then in December, I am closing out my tour in Denver and Vancouver. So get your tickets at Chelseahandler.com for the the high and mighty tour. Okay, hi, hi, hi, how's it going? Oh, it's going great. Chelsea, my in-laws were here this last weekend. How did that work out? I know that, how did your jury duty work out, Brad?

It was an adventure. Really? Yeah. Did you solve a murder? No, I didn't. It was an indecent exposure case. Oh. And the guy was pretty creepy, so I got myself excused.

You did? Yeah, I did. Yeah, he did. Basically, he told him, like, I can't be impartial. Well, also because our brother-in-law is a prosecutor for exactly that type of person. But why couldn't you impartial? Who's going to be impartial about like a decent exposure? Fair, fair.

Who's impartial about that? And I thought it was so interesting because Brad said, like, Is there a group of people that want that to happen? No. But I guess it was like a misdemeanor and the guy was already in a jumpsuit. So Brad said because of our brother-in-law, he already knew that like he was a repeat offender. So it's like, you know, so he knew. Oh, you knew inside scoop.

Yeah, I got the inside scoop. I see, I see. I see. Yeah, I think the lawyers were glad to get rid of him. I don't know, man. Even the defense attorney was pretty creepy. So I just kind of made it clear that I wasn't going to be very useful as a juror. And I just wanted to be here when my family got here. This was such a crazy thing.

So the last day, we had kind of a free day. And we had my little 15-year-old niece and my mother-in-law is there. And she was like, you know, I've always loved the look of a nose ring, like a little sparkle, a little something. And she's got, like, cute little petite features. And we were like, girl, you got one life to live. Like, let's do this if you really want one. She was like, really? So she is 70 years old, almost 70 years old, almost 70 years old.

And we took her to get a nose ring. A nose ring. And it looks fabulous on her. And she was like, I never had girlfriends to like support me in doing something like this. I'm so excited. So it was a very exciting and thrilling time. Well, that is just adorable. Nose rings for everyone.

I wouldn't mind a nose ring, although I don't want to get my nose pierced. Yeah. I don't want to go through the pain of it. You just get a fakeie and just get a little, just get a little clip. Our guest today is very entertaining. She is a media mogul actress, producer, entrepreneur, and one of the most visible and influential transgender voices in entertainment. You can find her on her podcast.

It's called Outlaws or as a judge on Rupal's Drag Race. Please welcome T.S. Madison. My manager has a child. Like, she has a black one and a white one. Oh, she, okay, do you do this, Chelsea? Do you, do you wipe his ass? No. I don't think I've ever wiped anyone's ass but my own.

Oh, we're going to have a. Can we curse? I wonder. Yeah, of course. What do you mean? This is America in 2020. All rules have gone out the fucking window. Oh, yes, we can curse.

Look what's happening in this world. Cursing. That's the least of anybody's worries. Girl, I want to talk about the rose how you pulled them together at their rose. Let's do it. We'll do it all. You have let them hold it. Let's wait.

Just let's fucking talk about it. Okay. No problem. Brad are we rolling. We are. Amazing. We're good. Oh, T.S.

Madison is in the house. Uh-oh. Jaya, come get this. Bucle-a-Gone. We're good. So I'll be doing it. Trya, come back. And get this pocketbook and get my phone shit over there because I want to time.

And Madison, I'm Catherine. I'm Catherine. Yeah. Like Chancellor. Remember you knew of Catherine? I'm Chancellor. I'm Chancellor. I'm Chancellor and she's Catherine.

Catherine. Catherine. Chelsea, Catherine. And T.S. Madison. And T. And T. Madison.

Yeah, baby. Yes, yes. So, oh my God, I'm excited. Welcome. You look ravishing. Well, I like to get ravished. Yeah, you're very voluptuous and I like your body type. And guess what?

We're allowed to say shit like that now. Good, yes. All the rules are out the fucking window. You see this motherfucker is really up here changing the Constitution, doing whatever the fuck they want to do. That's right. So I'm an American. We want to do.

Exactly, exactly. Yes. First of all, you have some updates that I'd like to announce to our audience. Okay. That are very exciting. This month, You received the Miss Major's Pioneer of the Year Award at the BET Black and iconic soire named for legendary trans activist Miss Major Griffin Gracie.

So congratulations on that award. Thank you. Thank you much. Well deserved. Thank you. And then you also took the first homes you ever purchased in Atlanta and transformed it into the T.S. Madison Starter House, which is a safe reentry housing program for formerly incarcerated black trans women.

And ex-prostitute. Up top, sister. And prostitutes because you got to understand, like, I was that. Like, with all these accolades and stuff that you may read about me, I never shy away from my past. Because the moment you start shying away from your past, it's when people are like, oh, oh, I got her. Yeah. Yeah, you sucked a dick on the corner. Remember you did that?

Yeah, I wrote about it in a book. Exactly. Yeah, I did. That's like me. I announce all my shit. So when they try to come out me and it's like, hey, buddy, I already talked about this in the New York Times, you fucking loser. Yeah, motherfucker asshole bitch. Yeah, I did.

So what were we doing now? Let's talk about that. Let's talk about your past. Let's start with your childhood. Okay. I want to know when you, what age were you, when you saw someone that represented what you thought that you could be? I am 40. I'll be 49 in October.

I remember in 1992 I saw the crying game, deal. Remember deal? The character deal. Yeah, of course. So it was the crying game. And it's when I first figured out, because I had saw RuPaul. You know, Rupal is, you know, which I'm a judge on Rupal's drag race. But I saw Rupal and I knew that Rupal put it on, took it off.

I couldn't take me off. You know what I'm saying? And so I saw the crying game. And like the biggest thing in that movie was the reveal. Titties at the top, dick at the bottom. I was like, oh, that's me. Really? Because I don't, here's the thing.

I am, I. The only time that I really ever struggled with wanting to have a sex change operation was during my teenage years when I was peer pressured into it by other girls around. It's like, well, the only way that you're going to be like a real woman is if you get your dick cut off. Like if you got to be. So, you know, I was pressured back there because I started transitioning when I was about 17 years old. And so, you know, I started transitioning here in the mind. I grew up in the church.

And so, you know, growing up in a church, you know, everything's going to hell. Seven years old, I found Christ with my mom. I got baptized. Where was he? I found Christ in the pulpit of the church. And the guy was saying, if you come on, bring your soul out. So I let my mom to Christ. Oh, you let her to Christ.

She didn't lead you to Christ. No, she didn't leave me. I led her to Christ. And then after me leading her to Christ, we were Christians after then. Okay. So I got baptized. First time I got baptized, girl, like right after the baptism, I had a hard penis in the back. Seven.

There's other men back there. We all had just got baptized. And so I was like, well, why the fuck do I have a hard dick right now? Wasn't that supposed to, wasn't I supposed to be washed? You had the hard penis or you felt another person's heart penis? No, I had the heart penis. Oh, you had the heart penis. I got an erection.

Okay. You had an erection at the baptism. Afterwards. After, like after I was baptized and they took us in the back. back back there. Oh, this is going to be some good stuff for you. After they, they took us in the back and, like, we, you know, we changed robes because they put us in these white robes and then they dip you in the water

and you go to the back. And then it's just like, all the men were back to getting naked and I was like, my penis got erect. But I was seven. Okay. So maybe that was, but I never forgot that my dick got hard. Okay. And so then later on. Was that the first time you ever experienced an erection? You know, what,

come to think about it? Probably. Okay. Probably. Probably. Wow. Nobody ever ask me that. Well, I wonder how many people did experience their first erection during a baptism. Maybe there's more than just you. Maybe. You know, usually like, maybe that's a thing. That's kind of like, you know.

Or maybe it was because I was in a room full of dicks. I don't know. That's what I mean. You're with other men, right? And then you have your penis, I don't know. Nobody, you know, nobody ever asked me that. Well, that's crazy. That's making me think like. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's making me think too. Yeah, like, what the thing? So after that, you know, I'm growing up, going to church and stuff, whatever, you know, you're hearing about homosexuality is the sin, being gay as this, and you're going to hell. So of course, it's, it's, it's, you, you suppress whatever feelings and things that you have, you know, about, you know, what you're attracted to.

And then you're like, well, I want to like girls, but I don't think girls, you know, are, like, that doesn't make my, me have an, you know, direction. You know what I'm saying? I've always found women to be extremely beautiful. Yeah. Of course, because you want it to be in. Yeah. Right. So, you know, so it's like I like to look at women and I like the way, you know, and being raised by a woman and, but I just didn't want to have sex with a woman. So fast forward, like 14, I heard a voice, I was watching Rupal on TV. and I heard a voice say, that's going to be your friend and y'all are going to work together. 14. I'm 49.

That was 14 years old. I heard that. And then, you know, now I'm a judge on drag race. But I'm jumping around because you got me excited. Yeah, great. You know? But me thinking, like, I had a connection to something. I don't know what it was.

I've always been connected to hearing a voice or feeling an emotion or something. but it never was an attraction to sexually attracted to women. When I turned 17, I had an experience to where I met another trans woman that became my gay mama. And when I met her, I worked at Long John Silvers. I know it. I know her well. Two-piece fishing more. So it was Long John Silver.

She came through Long John Silver's and like I looked out the window and we had been hearing about her for the long because she used to do hair in our neighborhood. Like, you know, and I looked at the window and she was there. And I knew it wasn't a woman, but it wasn't a man. It was something. And so the only encounter that I had ever seen prior to that was in 92 was watching the crying game. So it's just like these are, these are the pieces started to connect.

And so she was looking at me in the drive-through window and she was like, I remember that coming out. Oh, she said, what's your name? And I was like, Timothy. And she was like, how much was my, how much was the order? I can't remember how much a two-piece fishing war was back in 90, whatever. But I rang it up and she, and I passed her food out the winter, and she reached it. And she was like, ah, and she grabbed my arms and stuff like that with her long nails and claws.

And I just, I felt like, what happened? because then I just feel like it was a transfer of something. Yeah, transference of energy. Yeah. Of possibility. Yeah. And so it was so crazy to me because, you know, it was like one of those experiences of like so much shit was just crashing in my brain. And I'm like, well, girl, what is this?

What is it? And I remember my manager coming back there saying, you know, that's a man. That's a man. But I'm like, I know it's not a man, it's not a man, but it's not a female. But I think that's kind of like me, you know? Yeah. I was really problematic in school. I'm assuming now that I'm older that it was because I was battling all the things that I was taught and all the ideas that was placed to me and, you know, all the.

And I remember meeting another queer kid in school that was a, that was a, you know, and I remember. meeting another queer kid in school that was androgynous, I would say. And I remember her, they, them, she, all of that asking me, why do you eat like a man? You're supposed to eat like this. You're a girl. I was like, I'm not no fucking girl, you know? And she got killed during our spring break and I cried like a kid because I was like that was like my first time like really just interacting outside of me working over here the crying game. It was just interacted with something else outside of church. Who do we know who killed her? Yeah, some guys killed her. Oh, God. Sometimes Chelsea, when I think about it, you know, and I think about where I am in life

I was like, well, what What would have happened if she would have survived? Like to see the world change and then me being a changemaker in the world and me actually embracing exactly who I am and stuff like that. Like, I wonder what she, or wonder could she see me, you know?

I think about it sometimes. I think about it. Like, it weighs on my heart heavy at times because, you know, I was a kid, and I saw stuff in images and freedom. I saw what freedom look like. So I met other trans women who started telling me like in order for me to be like a real woman, you know, you ought to get a pussy. You have a pussy and all the stuff.

And I was like, I don't want a pussy. I don't want to have a pussy. It's already enough like in the straight world, you got to have a lot of women to be a man. in the trans world you got to be a real woman you got to have a pussy it's just like too many rules and regulations i want to live on my own terms i don't i want to be who i am on my own terms i don't want to have to you know submit over here in the rainbow in the in the straight world of having to you know you know just look away be away build away shape away muscle away you know and then over here in this world well you got to be this and that it's like girl i didn't get them

of the rainbow to follow these fucking rules. You know what I'm saying? And so I saved up money. And I was really in the process of like, all right, well, in order for me to be a real woman, I got to go get a pussy. So I don't, you know, pussies back then were like $50,000, $60,000. Like if you wanted a real good pussy, you had to go to Thailand or some land. And like, I'm a well-endowed girl.

So I have a lot of dick. Oh, okay. And I didn't want to get rid of my mother. fucking dick. I didn't want to do it. I like this. I like this. I like everything you're saying.

Seriously. Why are there rules to being a trans woman? That's not a rule. Why are there rules to being a human? Exactly. Hey, I'm Tori Webster and I host That Digital Take. If you've ever wondered how the internet really works, from influencer culture to digital marketing and pop culture, this is your inside look.

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This kid, Jafar Jackson, is as good as Rami Malik as Freddie Mercury. And it's as good as Timothy Shamaulay as Bob Dylan. And I say that with love and respect for both of those actors. And I don't know how many Oscar nominations they give out. I don't know if it's five, six for Best Actor. 150% this kid, Jafar Jackson, should absolutely positively get nominated for his portrayal as Michael Jackson. Listen to I Am Rap Report on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. This Black Music Month, the Quest Love Show celebrates the artists, innovators, and cultural voices who continue to redefine music.

We're sitting down with a groundbreaking country artist, Mickey Guyton. The way that the country music community accepted Post Malone versus Beyonce versus Shibuzy, like, Those are very eye-opening things. Hip-hop visionary Fat-Fi Freddie, genre-bending musical genius, Thundercat. And the always-legendary revolutionary voice, Chuck D. Yeah, we changed tires, man. I had 18 jobs before this became my occupation, man.

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or wherever you get your podcast. When you're telling the story about this younger girl that it was killed, murdered, I think this is something that rings true for me and it sounds like it rings true for you from everything that I've seen of years and just talking to you that when you are in a position of power

and you have a platform that is larger than most, you're not just doing it for yourself. You're doing it for all of the people that we've lost and all of the people that came before you and all of the people that will come after you. So when you say you think about that girl, like that is like with every move you make, it's a lot of responsibility, you know, to think of so many others when you're making decisions. But I think with prominence comes a lot of responsibility. And a lot of it I didn't want because, of course, I'm going to always color outside of the lines. and, you know, it's gotten me in a lot of trouble. A lot of my opinions have gotten me in a lot of social trouble, you know, because, you know, I just, I've color outside of the lines.

Like, what, can you think of something that's gotten you into trouble recently? Listen, I just, just recently, and then I want to tell you about my sex change story. Okay. Just recently, I made a statement about D.L. Hughley? I cussed that motherfucking I cussed his motherfucking ass out

What happened with Diel? Well, because it was some shit that happened with me and just hilarious and because there was this issue around trans women being trying to erase cis women and all of this type of who has

control over periods in womanhood and that was another trans woman that, you know, made the comment. And I was like, well, of course females have control over womanhood. They're females. Like, what the fuck?

Like, we don't, like, I don't give them how altered and how gorgeous and how we're not females. We could be women, but we're not females. So we don't have periods. Now, the way that they twisted my words was, you know, and, like, Like D.L made this statement and he said, well, T.S. Madison and it was on the radio saying this shit. And I was like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, nigga. Don't you know that you ain't supposed to, don't you know that we don't all look alike. You black.

You should know how it feels that we don't all look alike. Uh-huh. Yeah. You know, don't misconstrue me and don't say like that I said that when that's not what I said. You know, don't take my words and take another person's words because like all. trans like she's me and that girl don't even look alike like but a lot of straight people or cis people i should say don't even think beyond you know like they can't imagine that you would be trans and not have bottom surgery or sexual uh but chel see my problem with d l was like sir

you're black don't act like that people don't think that all us black folks look alike so you should know when i'm telling you or when i'm when i'm correcting you saying hey i didn't say that Blossom said that. Yes, she's trans, but just because we trans and a thing. I didn't say that what I said was Jess Salarius should have said female instead of woman. Because I understood her plight. No, we are trans women.

We're not female. So, yes, females do have control over the womanhood aspect of that when it comes to periods because that's something that we would never experience. you and I will have shared experience. We'll never have the same lived experience. But that's true for everybody, regardless of our sex or, you know. But do some trans women consider themselves to be female? Isn't that true for some trans women?

I do believe that there are, because we're not a monolith. And so there are trans women that consider themselves female. I'm not one of those trans women. I consider myself a trans woman. Like I've lived 17 years of my life, 18 years of my life, as a butch queen, a gay boy, but I still was a woman on the inside. So I don't consider myself like a trans woman packing some serious heat. Yeah, I was always still got it, honey. You know, and so in that, I was pressured to get a sex change even in that.

And I'm like, girl, you know, I didn't want it. So I have a, I met a Puerto Rican, Ricken, you know. know, that's one of my stuff. I met a Puerto Rican guy one night after the club. And, you know, to make the long story short, you know, he was, he wanted me to get totally naked. And so I didn't tell him at the time that I was, had a dick, you know, but he was like, bitch, you're early in your transition, girl. I know you got a dick. But, you know, I'm going to play stupid with you, like a lot of men do. So, so trans girls out there stop playing those games. There are a lot of men that played stupid with you.

Girl, they know you have or have had a dick. But anyway, so he was like, get naked. So when I got all the way naked and I had my hands in the front of my private like that and he was saying like, you know, move your hand. Let me see. So I moved my hand and it flopped. And he was like, oh my God, you're so beautiful. After that, like after our sexual experience, I never thought about having another sex change.

Until recently, until recently, when Trump got in office. And I said, maybe I might need to do this to protect myself from whatever's coming. Maybe I might need to do it. Because I can pass. And I was like, well, maybe I could just. But then I'm like, well, bitch, your T.S. Madison. So even if you got a pussy, they know you didn't have one before. If somebody spot you, so.

You know, like these were thoughts that are going through my head. But I don't have those thoughts. Right. You feel settled. I'm good. You're good. And you're going to keep your penis. Oh, I'm keeping it.

Okay, good for you. I'm made up my mind. Up top on your penis. Way to go. Keeping my baby. What is, okay, so there's a phrase for men. We were talking about this. Yeah.

Only date. Are there, is a thing? There's like gay men and there's straight men. But is there a word for men who only date trans women? Yeah. Because, but is then the, is. Is that then a fetish if we're like a chaser? Well, well.

Dylan Mulvaney always says chaser. Chaser. Yep. We call them in our community, we do call them training chasers, but which we just, we can't really use the word, but, you know, I'm not offended by the word, but just because I'm not offended doesn't mean that somebody else is not offended. So let me retract that because T.S. Madison, you have a responsibility to know that this is a large platform.

You got to behave. We call them the T word chasers. but there is a term, a new term that the girls have come up with that describe men that have an attraction to trans women only. And do you like that? At this big age, I like a man that's attracted to me. Yeah. I find that people who are only attracted to one very specific type of person to be, I find that always to be a little bit off-putting. It's like women who only date a certain type of man or men who only date a certain type of woman.

Like they're seeking the type and not the person. It's not very bad. Yeah. You know? And so it feels crazy, especially being that I am a well-endowed girl, there are men because I did get into the porn industry and shit like that. And I did. Oh, God, I did so much shit. You did a lot of sex work, right?

I did. I did. How long did you do that for? A decade and a half. What was your experience and what is your takeaway now that you're so far out of it? My experience was I reshaped culture with it because I'm a black girl that was that cornered the market. And during the time of my, when I emerged, I emerged on the scene when there was, there was, it was like a niche market. and I made sure that I capitalized off of me being voluptuous and hood and business savvy all wrapped in the same cloth

and then told the other big name companies like who I'm friends with now. So if y'all watch this, we're friends like Groobey and Bob's T-Girls, like a lot of these T-girl places. I told them they couldn't have me. You can't have me, bitch, because I'm motherfucking T.S. Madison. I'm big dig bitch.com. You can't have me. You can't have me because I understand that my black skin is powerful. I understand that my BBC is powerful.

And I understand that I know how to control that without having a machine control me. So I took ownership of that. And I made all the money without, I removed the middleman. I made all the money. Nice. Entrepreneur. Yeah. And I didn't need them to do.

any other things. And so, you know, what I did, though, was I did lots of videos, lots of raunchy, like, lots of, lots of little things that changed the way men saw trans women. There is a lot of stuff that I, I don't regret it. Or maybe I do, do I? I don't know. Let's find out. When I'm approached by men now, a lot of them be like, oh my God, I wanted to fuck you since I was 15. Or like I've been watching you since I was 14, 15, 16. Like you were my first trans I ever saw. I was like, oh shit.

Or we'll be out somewhere. And then women, women, women. Like, you got a big dick. I seen it. I was like, girl. Like we were at the Emmys. And this lady ran me down outside. And she was the fucking homeless lady.

And she ran me down. And she was like, T.S. T.S. I want to take a picture. What you can I take a picture? I was like, yeah, come on. She said, I'm hugging him. And she was like, I've been, I'm a big fan of yours. And when people say that I don't know what era there. I don't know what error, but I start to get nervous. And she was like, girl, you got a big dick. I said, oh, Jesus Christ, you're from that era. You're from that era. Okay. She says, but I've been watching so long. She says, I love the way that you've just, your trajectory. I just love it, but you still got that big old dick, don't you? And I'm like, girl, why are you asking me this at the Emmys?

At the end of the fucking Emmys. And then I meet people. Jerry O'Connell is my good friend. I love Jerry O'Connell. That's my, I love Jerry. He's a real hot mess. Yeah, he is. And I like that.

I love Jerry. And so Jerry and I were, we did an episode of, let me pick you up on the World of Wonder created for me. And we were in the car. And I was saying all kind of crazy shit to Jerry or whatever. And I said, Jerry, where's the first time that you saw me? And it was so funny. He said, I found you online.

I never. I didn't. End of sentence. Listen, I didn't even dig. I was all shit. I didn't dig for nothing or whatever. And I was like, because, you know, he's married to Rebecca. And I was like, so, well, what did the, because we worked, Jerry.

myself and Rebecca worked on a show called Gay for Play with Rupal, and he chose me as his partner, he's what you call a partner? And I was like, well, you tell Rebecca that you do my homeboy, you know, I ain't trying to own, you know, it was just a joke. People from all walks of life. And it's just like, there are times that I'm like, fuck, why did I do those little videos?

What cataported me. But why would you regret that? You know, when you get to a certain place, You don't want people to really see you. It's just because sometimes they can't let that go. But that's also erasure in a sense. Like you're erasing the person that helped you evolve to become the person that you are. So we can all look back at parts of our past that maybe we're not so proud of

or that isn't representative of who we are today. But that doesn't negate that that that's part of who brought us to where we are. I would argue that it's very important to think of our past as things. that we wouldn't want to take back. It's like a formula to become who you are today. I mean, I don't, I don't. If I had the chance to do it all again, I would probably tweak it, but do it.

Well, we would all fucking tweak it, baby. I would tweak it. But I didn't say I would erase it. I would tweak it a little bit. But you know what I'm saying? I'd be like, oh, shit, you know, especially knowing what I know now. But it's just sometimes it gets weird.

It feels weird. Like sometimes, like when I'm, Like if I'm at a gathering and a guy, it's like, oh, God, I just want to suck your fucking dick. And I'm like, here. Like, or they'll tell me, I remember this video you was. I was like, I remember that video. I don't want to talk about that here. Yeah, okay.

Like, I don't want to do that here. Well, if it makes you feel any better, I have DMs telling me the same things all day long. I just posted a carousel of DMs of men telling me how much pussy. they want a lick of mine and eat me from the back. These are men I've never met before. So I feel like men in general just are having, they feel comfortable saying these things to women anywhere, anytime, any place.

And again, I really don't think that's on you. Okay, good. Because why would you fucking bring that up at the Emmys? The Emmys. Why would you? That's on you, too. Well, the lady told me that is the women. Okay, well.

Because women wanted to fuck me too. Yeah. And that's okay. You know what I'm saying? So it's like I've been approached about women. men, other fucking trans women. But you're only into men, right? Yeah, you're into men.

Do you have a boyfriend, like a serious person in your life? I'm very into freedom now. Okay. I used to want to be, but now I'm into freedom. I feel like that everybody should know that I'm a whore when I want to be. And then when I want to be cuddled that I chose you to cuddle with. And can I ask you, this is a crude question. I love it, crude.

Okay. So do you like to be penetrated and to penetrate? Ooh, thank you for asking me this, Chelsea. Now I can explain. Great. I know our listeners are. Now I can explain. For my freak-offs, I'm open. I'm a mattress. I will flip over. I'm a pancake. Pancake me, motherfucker. I will flip over, flip me. But that Puerto Rican guy did that to me. That's why that I got into the flipping. Because at one point, I was like, oh, don't do that, you know. And then the Puerto Rico. American guy that told you was like,

girl, you're beautiful, you're that. And he got on it and wrote that shit like a fucking cowboy. Right. And you liked that. I liked that. But you know, but that was a freak off. Okay. Now, a gentleman and this is problematic. So I'm telling y'all now, I'm looking

in your eyes and tell you what I'm getting ready to say is problematic. So don't get in the comments and don't go doing all these dissertations about this shit. It's problematic what I'm getting ready to say. that's my disclaimer for my personal I like my man

to fuck me to death and I don't need him to be into my penis I just need him to understand that it's there you know I don't need you to be into he don't got to touch it

he don't got to suck it now if he suck it that's I'm all right with that now if he starts bending over for me to fuck him now we're in the freak sessions now okay got it and now like I don't

I don't want you to be your girl because now you want me to fuck you in the ass, which I will. I'm not asphobic. I will hit that. But I'm not going to marry that. It feels like the world is your oyster. That's what I feel. I mean, so many.

Really. It really kind of, this is very illuminating. And I really appreciate your candor because having to ask you to explain this kind of feels like annoying. It's kind of like having to ask a black person to explain racism. And I don't want to put that on you. So I really appreciate your openness and explaining your personal experience because I know there's a lot of people listening that feel like you have to choose one bucket or the other bucket. And even in the trans community, it's like you have to be a full woman or you have to have bottom surgery or top surgery. So I think this is a very...

I don't want to do it. I don't want to adhere to any rules and regulations. I don't want do it. I had to do it as a kid. I had to, you know, you got to do it in the church. You got to do it off here. It's like, God damn it, I just want to be free. Do you feel free? I do. Yeah. I don't feel bound to anything. I don't. And I'm never going to let anything bind me ever again. Like, you're not going to tell me, well, I'm not a real this because of, no, bitch, I'm real because this is, I said I'm real. You're not going to tell me that I need to have this in order to, no, I don't. You know what I'm saying? Like to be complete.

You come, I'm complete. I complete me. I complete me. You know, it took a while because you're over there like, shit, like, oh my God, well, you know. And this is why I don't surround myself with people who are incomplete. I don't surround myself with people who are incomplete because they can influence you. when like even after you you've gotten your first surgery you know what if i would if i'd pinch my nose just a little bit more if that's why my ass is so fucking big and my hips are so big because i was

walking the streets back in the day and it was like the bigger your body is the more scars you'll stop and it's just like now you're competing with all the girls who you know what i'm saying who well her ass is bigger so you got to go bigger than her Her titty is a bigger or her nose is smaller, so that makes her look really fit. Like, bitch, you got to get to some point where you're satisfied with you. And that's why I'm open about me talking about my bottom. Because, you know, now there are some girls that will not. And that's them.

And that's okay. I'm comfortable with however it feels because I'm totally complete with me. So I talk about my bottom. And I talk about that not to. Lots of females like to tell me, bitch, you'll never be a woman because you'll never have a pussy. You're mad at me because I have a real pussy. You want to have a real pussy. And I always explain to them, well, I name myself big dick bitch because I don't want to have a pussy.

And I'm okay with me having a cock. And I am still she, her, and hers. and I'm cool with that and I'm cool with what likes me I am fine with what's attracted to me 99.99.999% of gay men are not attracted to me because my presentation

is women you don't see this until the panties come down sometimes when the panties are down there are men that's like, no, I don't want that. I want the presentation. It's okay that it's there, but I don't want that. Okay.

So that's just how it works. I'm still she to him. Where people will say, well, you're not a she until this is gone. No, I'm a she here. I'm a her here. I'm also a her here. because when it's being played or toyed around with, I call it a she-ness, S-H-E-I-N-S-S-S-S-S.

Thank you for spelling that for us in case we couldn't figure that fucking out. Make that the title of this episode. Absolutely. Then you spell she-no. You end up hell with weekend gold tickets to Lassau Montreal. Thomas Rhett. Molford and Sons. Pride is my shame.

John Party, Old Dominion, Carly Pierce, and more. And the prize gets even sweeter. With flights from Porter Airlines, three nights at Residence Inn downtown Montreal, and $1,000 cash. Download the free I-Heart Radio app, listen to Pure Country for 10 minutes, and enter to win. Lassau, Montreal. Every day you listen is another chance to win. Hey, I'm Hoda Kotby, host of the podcast, Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby. Together, we're going to have meaningful conversations with the world.

world's most fascinating people. Like when actress Olivia Munn shared how she overcame fierce health challenges. I've gone through breast cancer and then helped my mother through breast cancer. And that was more difficult. There's a lot of people who understand postpartner depression. I was not prepared for postpartum anxiety. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is Michael Rappaport, and my podcast, the I Am Rapaport's Stereo Podcasts, is unlike

anyone you've ever heard. We're a variety show. And if you're looking for strong opinions, funny opinions about sports, entertainment, politics, pop culture, and whatever else catches my attention, then subscribe now. This kid, Jafar Jackson,

is as good as Rami Malik as Freddie Mercury, and it's as good as Timothy Shamaulay as Bob Dylan. And I say that with love and respect for both of those actors. And I don't know how many Oscar nominations they give out, I don't know if it's five, six for best actor. 150% this kid, Jafar Jackson, should absolutely positively get nominated for his portrayal

as Michael Jackson. Listen to I Am Rap Report on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Welcome to Sabara Football, the sweet and the spicy on and off the field. I'm Daniela Duran, and this is where we get to know the people behind. behind the game like never before. The pressure, the fame, and everything that happens

when the cameras turn off. Enjoy conversation with guests like Marlbartra. You like Marlito Oraldes or Gassillas? Sure. Guilla Giacos, Puyol, and I-Biquet? In Ervalencia. Yes, in the last days, the fact that always

is always, the people, it's like in the parties at the tars, but the dream of being a footballist that, the reality. Sharon Escobar, Pollo Disseon. You're not with my rod.

You're not? You're viral with that. You're going to, you're going. Oh, but I'm... I'm going to a message just a little bit of salutes. Federeira. If you say,

no I can't elective, tell you, I'm sorry, but... Oh, I'm glad. I'm so. I like. An applause.

I'm going to do. And many more. Listen to Zabura football on the Aija Radio app, Apple Podcast, or whatever you get your podcast. This conversation is more enlightening

than our Neil deGrasse Tyson conversation about quantum physics. Honestly. This is so enlightening. I'm learning so much. I really appreciate it. It's really good to understand that there are so many different variations. And what you're saying, paramount to everything, is for, you know, any young person who is, like,

struggling and not with their identity and what they're supposed to do if they transition. It's like you're giving a license to people to take what they want and don't take what they want, you know, to be who you are in your head is more important than any of the first. physical stuff. Yes, it. Because you have to know, you can't let other people know for you. You have to know. And you've got to know when to stop.

Like all the mistakes. Sometimes I look at my body and I'm like, Madison, you made that mistake because you was trying to compete with this bitch over here. Madison, you got this scar over here. You wouldn't have had this scar girl on your leg or your hip or on your, you wouldn't have had this stuff if you wouldn't have been, if you would have just settled in your mind. You knew you were good.

Uh-huh. You knew that. And there are scars that I have on my body that I that I kept. Like I didn't go get a skin graft for certain things because I got, girl, I don't know how long we got, but I got a whole story. I got silicone poisoned. Oh God. All kind of shit.

I have scars on me that I could have went and got skin grafted because I got it. But I make sure that I stand in the mirror when I'm naked to remind myself, bitch, you are who you are. You got that scar because you were trying to be this. You got that scar because you were trying to be that. Look at your scars as reminders of bitch, be exactly who you are, living exactly who the fuck you are. And bitch, so that you don't scar yourself again.

Right. Remember that. And so that's why I went, shit, we were all over the place, but we'll get it together. That's why when Beyonce did cozy and added me to that song. And I listened to the lyrics and I was able to chant that. And this is a recording that you made in your own house, right? My own house. During the George Floyd protest.

Yes. Right after his murder. Yes. You know, it was me protesting about me being black, me being trans, me, and I can't separate the two because sometimes in my community, in the black community, it's like, well, you're not black enough because you're trans now or you're not really black because you're gay. And it's like, what the fuck?

I'm black. I'm black and trans at the same time. I'm not separately at the same time. And so when she was talking about being comfortable in the skin, cozy with who you are, and when she was saying, I look at the scars. I was just like, oh, my God, she's singing this about me. This is about me. Because I talk about the scars of my body.

I talk about the things that I've been through in my life. I talk about the scars of being told that I'm going to burn in hell. and going through my entire life trying to fit everybody else's idea of what, you know, what is right. When my idea of me is right. It's right. I'm not hurting anybody. I'm not trying to confuse anybody. I'm up front.

And I just feel. like that I'm where I need to be. Was there any point in your life that you got advice that was invaluable from anyone? Rupal told me, T.S. Madison, don't you ever be too big for the small things? Because the small things will get you through when the big things aren't calling. And she said, because what you've got to understand, some other bitch will come through and get that small thing and become really big and you'll regret it. I was like, what the fuck?

That's great advice. We're going to give advice. Are you ready to give advice? We have callers and people calling in. Okay, call in. Oh, yes. Call in home. Call in to the doll.

Okay. She'll say, I love you, though. Oh, I love you. Listen, I'm in, the reason why I'm so. It's because I'm with Chelsea fucking handler. Oh, I love you. Do you understand, girl, that I've watched. I used to tell World of Wonder, because World of Wonder is the people who kind of like really

discover me and pushed me. I just said, when you guys make me a show, I want you to take the formula from Chelsea. And I want to do a night show like this. I need to be able to be crass. I need to be able to say pussy. Yeah. Dick. I need to be able to just be.

Well, obviously, it's still a working problem. Yeah, you just reminded me of all the legal battles that we would get into with the use of language. Like you could say, you could say somebody was jerking off, but you couldn't call someone a jerk off. They actually had to be like the act of jerking. Like all the semantics around the language, you just reminded me of the legal arguments we would get in daily, which now I think would be a moot point because language is whatever. Nobody gives a shit anymore if who's cursing. I didn't know you were going through stuff like that.

Oh yeah, yeah. We would fight all the time. They fucking hated me. E would be like, oh my God, because I was like, I would never back down. You know, I was like, no, this is a comedy show. These aren't serious issues. And, you know, the legal people would be very serious. It would be like, well, you can say rim job, but it has to be an actual rim job.

I'm like, what's an act? Do you know what a rim job is? Sir? I'm like, you mean like on a car or like an actual? So we would just have these really silly. but it was always really fun, you know. But you don't know how you change the the perception of censorship for me

because I was like, well, Chelsea is, she says it. I would be sitting there like, bitch, say this shit, say that shit, bitch, say that shit, because I'm going to say that motherfucking shit too. Yeah, it's fun to say it. Yes, and it's just like you said, you did it, you would read and you didn't give a fuck. you, Joan.

It's like this, this was stuff that I was just like, I got to, I want to be able to do this, you know, because this is me. And I just always wanted to tell you when I had the opportunity, I was like, bitch, thank you. Oh, thank you. Thank you. I love to hear that. That's really special. Thank you.

I like a foul mouth, mother. You like a foul mouth, white bitch. Yeah, baby. You know, sometimes there are things that you're going to say and you're, know you're going to say them. And sometimes like when I'm, like I have a speech prepared and there's just like certain lines. You just can't wait to get out of your mouth just to call someone on their shit right to their face. Like I love that feeling. I mean, men are just, you know, it's like not all men obviously, but men. All of them. All of them. Somebody said I read,

somebody sent me this Instagram thing yesterday. This beautiful British woman was talking about what the problem is with men right now. And it's like their identity used to be enough. Just being a man was enough. So the problem is that they have to come up with these other qualities. They have to be caring. They have to be actually talented. You can't just get by on being a man.

And that's where this cultural shift that we're all seeing and this anger and violence against women, which we've experienced, you know, since the beginning of time. but there's a real din right now, the way men talk about women, the way men, you know, degrade women. And they're like the Roe v. Wade, all of it is just like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. If you guys are being treated in the same way we are, then that means we actually have to step up our game and do something more than we're doing. Yes.

But I hate to say all men because I just, because I have to get fucked at some point by some men. You know what I mean? They will. They will still fuck me. Here's the thing, Chelsea, I say this at which he gets very infuriated when he watches my show. He says that I bash men. And it's like, no, I don't bash me because I love men. But I'm still going to say that I think that men love pussy more than women.

Yeah, for sure, absolutely. They love pussy more than women. It's a mental, that's it. Like, let me get my dick in something and fucking bust a nut. That's, of course. But there are men that do love women. they do, I mean, I don't think that they don't love them. Right, right.

Because when you start saying that, because they start saying like, oh, you're saying I'm gay. No, no, no, we're not saying that. No, I'm not saying that. No, I'm not saying you're gay. Tell me. That would be better, by the way. Tell me when was the last time that you actually laid in the bill of the woman and just listen to her, tell you about what's going on inside of her body, the changes that she

feels like, you know, like what's going on in her vagina or if she, if, you, if, you, whatever, when have you bonded with that? Or all your period on, okay, well, I got to go fuck me somebody else while your period. You think I'm going to wait seven days or you think I'm going to wait this long time until your period go off? And I'm going to go fuck me another pussy. No, why don't you, why are you not there nurturing her during that time and taking care of her during that time? No, you like, you love her, but you love a pussy more. Because if you can't get that pussy, you're going to go get you another piece of pussy in the problem.

And that doesn't mean. And it's like, because I have a lot of straight men around me. And I'm like, sir, you like pussy. And that's fine. You don't really know her. You don't know her. You don't know how her day is. You don't know how she feels on the inside.

You don't know her. And she knows you. She could tell you what the fuck is wrong with you. She could tell you when you, she could tell when you cheating on it because the dick is acting crazy because she's connected to you. You don't share that same. type of connection. And then it's like they get angry with me when I say you really don't like women like that. You like pussy. Let's see. Okay, well let's move on to our questions now.

You end up howl with weekend gold tickets to Lassau Montreal. Thomas Rhett. Mumford and Sons. Well, here's my pride and here's my shame. John Party, Old Dominion, Carly Pierce and more. And the prize gets even sweeter. With flights from Porter Airlines Three nights at Residence Inn downtown Montreal and $1,000 cash. Download the free Iheart radio app. Listen to Pure Country for 10 minutes and enter to win. Lassau, Montreal. Every day you listen is another chance to win.

Hey, I'm Hoda Kotby, host of the podcast, Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby. Together, we're going to have meaningful conversations with the world's most fascinating people. Like when actress Olivia Munn shared how she overcame fierce health challenges. I've gone through breast cancer and then helped my mother through breast cancer, and that was more difficult. There's a lot of people who understand postpartner depression. I was not prepared for postpartum anxiety. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is Michael Rappaport, and my podcast, the I Am Rapaport Stereo podcast, is unlike anyone you've ever heard.

We're a variety show, and if you're looking for strong opinions, funny opinions about sports, entertainment, politics, pop culture, and whatever else catches my attention, then subscribe now. This kid, Jafar Jackson, is as good as Rami Malik as Freddie Mercury, and it's as Timothy Shomalay as Bob Dylan. And I say that with love and respect for both of those actors. And I don't know how many Oscar nominations they give out, I don't know if it's five, six, for best actor. 150% this kid Jafar Jackson should absolutely positively get nominated for his portrayal as Michael Jackson.

Listen to I Am Rap Report on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Welcome to Sabara Football, the sweet and spicy on and off the field. I'm Daniela Durand, and this is where we get to know the people behind the game like never before. the pressure, the fame, and everything that happens when the cameras turn off. Enjoy conversation with guests like Mar-Bartra. Who do you like Marlito Oraldes or Gassizs? Sure, that Gigger Gagasias, Puyol and I Piquet. In Ervalencia.

Yes, in the last tars, the truth, the fact that always, the fact that's all the days. But the dream of being a footballist, that's, the truth of me. Sharon Escobar, Pollo Dicello. And does or not with me road? You're viral with this? You're viral? You're viral?

This is viral. This is real. I'm a message. Just a little bit of salutes. Federeira. If you say, no I can't elect. Tell us.

Sampas. I don't know. I like. I like. An applause. And many more. Listen to Zawara football on the Iger Radio app,

Apple Podcast, or whatever you get your podcast. Our first caller today is Celabay, and her question is about whether she should hook up with a younger man. Dear Chelsea,

I recently turned third. and got out of a relationship that absolutely leveled me. Since then, I found myself at a strange crossroads. For years, I dated the kinds of men you're supposed to date. Older, successful, wealthy, great jobs, great families, the kinds of men who can book a flight before you've even finished saying where you want to go. I spent years in Miami, which I believe legally counts as a graduate degree and dating rich older men. And it's not like I sought them out. It's just that those were the kinds of men who pursued me. The problem is that now, whenever one of these types of men tries to woo me, luxury travel or expensive dinners, I get the icks so aggressively that I practically need

medical attention. Meanwhile, I was recently talking to a 25-year-old who is objectively less qualified on paper, but somehow made me feel more excited than the guy offering to fly me to Tuscany. I called things off with him, but for the first time in my life, I'm wondering if I've been choosing partners based on resumes instead of chemistry. Part of me thinks it's time to date hot younger guys, have fun, and stop treating my love life like I'm hiring a CFO. The other part of me wonders if women are sold of fantasy about having fun and whether that actually ends up being fulfilling. So my question is, after a big heartbreak, how do you know whether you're finally listening to yourself or just temporarily losing your mind? Love, a woman

who spent her 20s dating balance sheets and is suddenly interested in personalities, Sheila Bay. Hi, Celia Bay. Hi, Celia Bay. This is our special guest today. T.S. Madison is here. Hi, Celia. So nice to meet you guys. Nice to meet you, too. Happy pride. Oh, yeah. Happy pride. Thank you. Thank you. I think you should have a good time. I think whenever you have a pattern of behavior that didn't work out and it was a pattern, like, and you recognize it, you should really just change up that pattern and like toss it out the window and just go for it in terms of doing the exact opposite of what you've done in the past and have a good time without any expectations and stop looking at it at the end result. Like stop looking at the outcome of a relationship before it

happens. We agree. Don't look at every. person as a potential partner for life, look at them as an experience in life. Like everyone is an experience if you don't put so much weight on it. And it's always worthwhile to break up a pattern. That was good advice, Joseph. I think that you should always fuck young, date rich. That's just it. Fuck young and date rich. Yeah, now you have to find a young, rich guy. No, I think that you can do that, whatever. But it's also nice to find out, like, there might be other attributes and qualities you

really like in people that you don't even know about yet. Yeah. See, you want the money, girl. You want the money. Maybe she'll make her own money. Girl, nobody wants to make their own money. Girl, take their money. I have my own fucking money.

I know you do. I have you. You have your own money. I got my own money, but I took some of those men's money and I invested it. So that's what you should do. You should fuck young, date rich, and always keep you. an investment account account on the side. You know what I'm saying?

An offshore account. Offshore. And when you get older, you know, you're going to find, well, here's the thing. When you get older, you're going to find yourself being that rich woman that's like, you're probably going to buy you a piece of dick here and there because you're going to feel power. It's going to make you powerful. You're going to feel powerful.

Like, girl, like they become expendable. And then you start noticing the patterns that men don't. It don't really change. And I'm not bashing men because I don't want to date anything else but a man. But you just got to call a thing a thing. Like men were bred to Rome. That's why you always get the rich ones. And if you settle with the rich ones, you understand.

And you fuck the young ones. Get into Polly. Are you into Polly? No, no, I don't think so. No, I could have told you no. I'm not. Girl, why are you not into Polly? Just based on what she's wearing and the way her hair is styled.

She is not into poly. Her tra poly. So, Despairetete. I don't think I have the energy. Yeah, that's the difference between men and women. It's that most women don't have the fucking energy for that. Polyandry. Polyamory.

Polyandry is when the woman has multiple husbands. That's married to her. They don't cheat on her. Oh. That's polyandry. But who cares if they're cheating anyway? Like misandry. Miss Andrew, yes, yes.

So I feel like I dated so strategically, like don't worry, I've got the high yield, the brokerage, the SEP IRA, Roth IRA, got the money on deck because of dating so strategically for so long and making my own money. And so I guess it's kind of like, do I just like love my hair down and just like have some fun. Have some fun. You don't know what you're missing because you don't know you've been so focused on one like area and one zone that like open. Broaden your horizons, you might come back. Open it up. Open up the field and just like let anybody in that seems to like strike an interest in you. As long as you're not paying for anything. I agree.

Like make sure that whoever you're dating or marry, like they can't touch your money. Yeah. Yeah. We're getting. I think she's all right. She knows what's up with money. Like she's the one who's looking for people for their money. She's not going to be a victim of someone trying to get her money.

Well, I mean, it can happen. It can happen. It can happen. Yeah. But she seems to be pretty on top of it. I think you should just open, like, just go into a casual mode of dating and date multiple people. Yes. And have a good time and see what's out there that you don't know that you like.

And be honest. Yeah. And tell them. Because what I find is when you tell a man that you're dating, I need to see who's going to vibe for the title. When you tell them like, yeah. Like, oh, I'm dating somebody else. It's like, oh, I'm not good. I'm not enough.

Well, show me that you can be enough. Yeah. The way that you defeat men is you take from their playbook. The only way that you are able to really control a man is if you match a man's energy with his. All men worship me. If they don't worship me, that's not my man. And I'm going to tell him, I have another friend, another guy, another gentleman. Because listen, that's what he's, he's hiding that for me.

Sir, don't flip your phone over. Don't hide your phone. Don't put it on silent. let it ring because I'm going to let mine ring. Okay, so I should definitely hit up this 25 year old because I told it off because I was like, I don't know. It's like the future and his career. No, no.

Who gives a shit? Just stop with that right now. You've already done that. Just take like a six month sabbatical and have as much fun as possible. Okay, period. And have him on his knee. He has to be on his knees and so. He will be.

He'll be on his age. Maybe with a leash on too. Yeah. That's great. That's great. Introduce a leash. Awesome. Thank you, Cila.

Thank you. Thank you. Bye. That's really two opposite ends of the spectrum of advice. We really offer her the whole spectrum. We're like, listen, bitch. You can do this or you can do this? Yeah.

But make sure that she is being paid. Yeah. I mean, we got your message. She needs to be getting paid for her work, loud and clear. Well, our next caller is Jessica. And she says, you're Chelsea. I'm a 35-year-old. single woman. And in February 2025, I had a bilateral salp injectomy because I am absolutely certain

I do not want children. So before the surgery, I think it's the fallopian tubes taken out. Okay. But it's basically she got sterilized. Okay. So before the surgery, I constantly ran into men who assumed I would eventually change my mind about having children. Some told me I was too young to know for sure. Others seem convinced that if I met the right guy, I'd suddenly develop the desire to become a mother. Part of the reason I chose permanent sterilization was because I wanted to remove any ambiguity. I wasn't on the fence. I wasn't waiting to be persuaded, and I wasn't looking for someone to change my mind. And yet, somehow, this didn't solve the problem. Even though I'm very clear on my dating profiles that I don't want children, I keep matching with men who want kids,

aren't sure if they want kids, or think my life choices are the opening bid in a negotiation. The most recent guy told me he didn't want children either. Later, I found out he, he had actually fathered a child with a woman he hooked up with in Mexico. His explanation was that because he wasn't involved in the child's life, he considered himself child-free. I nearly sprained an eyeball rolling it. How do I find a partner who genuinely wants the same child-free life I do? Is there some secret screening question I'm missing?

Or am I destined to spend every first date conducting a deposition and presenting evidence that I really, truly, actually mean it when I say I don't want kids? Sincerely, Jessica. Hi, Jessica. Hello. Thanks for having me. Oh, sure. This is T.S. Madison, our special guest is here today.

Hi, Jessica. How are you? Hi. Great. How are you? I'm sitting right Puerto Rican right now. Riggins. Puerto Rican. What does your dating profile say? Maybe it needs to be bolder.

Like, this is a non-negotiable issue. I will not and am not having any children. It's not physically possible. So that please don't come to me unless you're on the exact same page. Right now, my dating profile says that I don't. want children, it doesn't say it's a non-negotiable. I think I'm just being a little too nice out there. Yeah, you see it already too nice. So you have to be very straightforward with people, very direct in these circumstances, because you don't want anyone approaching you that you're going to

go on three dates with and then have the same conversation. That's a waste of your time. So just cut out the waste. Make it very clear. Like this is not possible physically and I have no desire. So I made it impossible. So if you're on the same page and want to live a life without children, please let me know, but we're not having a conversation about it. Yeah. And because men, like, can't be ours to read your whole profile, I would also like, as you're chatting with someone before taking the time to meet up with them, I would just be like, hey, I just like to check because like I'm so not on board with having kids. Like, are you in the same place? Or are you sort of waffle, you know, just like double check before you waste your time on some guy, right? Yeah. I'm like, I'm letting Catherine finish,

I'm saying, watch this. Sister, listen to me thoroughly. Okay. You have to understand that men send the representative first. So the first person that you meet is the shell of the person. It's who they, you know what I'm saying? It's like who they think that you want them to know who they are. Let them talk.

Let them talk. let them explain, you know, rub their balls, not literally, but just, you know, stroke them. Get them to just like talk. So they'll tell you if they want kids or how they feel about kids or, you know, or how they feel about, listen, anytime that I meet men, I always just let them, I never tell them what I like sexually. I never tell them what I like, you know, physically. I let them do because this is naturally who. they are. This is naturally what they are. And if the moment that you start telling them stuff for you, so they'll, they'll try to conform to that and try to make you comfortable so they can

get in bed with you. And then later on, you'll find out, well, I want the kids anyway. But just let them talk, you know. Sometimes they'll tell you, shit, I got four kids in my own. I don't even want no muffin kids no more. It's like, okay. So how many, how many mothers are there? You know, there's two. So, okay, so what I'm finding out is that you have four kids. Two relationships didn't work out. You father took it and now you're gone. And now you're a single man over here with you, with you, you kick it with the family and the kid.

Okay, now you're not the dude for me. You might not be the one for me because you, you know, whatever it is that you, however you feel, you know, whatever you're looking for, don't tell them what you're looking for. Let them tell you who they are. My profile is blank if I'm on a date. It's blank. 36 24 3610

I like that I like that whatever we'll talk about the rest of it I'm 36 24 36 10 if you don't if you can't figure out what that 10 is then that means you're not reading the profile right anyway I think you have your marching orders you have to be more direct and don't worry about being nice

listen we don't have time for that anymore Yeah. No. You just have to be direct with people and you have to be overly direct because this is your future. You're looking to find a partner. So it's better just to get all of like the chit chat out of the way and like and save yourself some time from going on dates with people who aren't on the same page. Yeah. And also kudos to you for like knowing what you wanted and making it happen. Yeah. Good for you for getting that done. I'm sure if more women knew I had an ablation, which is basically they scorch your uterus. What's the procedure that you referenced in your letter? bilateral self-injectomy, so it's removing the fallopian tubes. Oh, good for you. That sounds very sexy. And you don't, so you don't want any children at all? Well, she's going to have a little one through her procedure? It's a wrap.

There's nothing happening there. And that's because she just never wanted any kids. No, no. You keep your 10 inches away from her. She doesn't want a baby. Would you be a stepmom? No. It's a movie.

It's happening, people. It's a movement. Awesome. Thank you, Jessica. Thanks, Jessica. Have a great day. You too. You too.

Bye. I'm Cynthia Lois. And I'm Josie Dye. And we're done pretending we have it all figured out. Each week we laugh, cry, and talk our way through life's messiest moments. Things you think about but would never say out loud. The questions you are always too shy to ask. Relationships, regrets, awkward moments, and the stuff no one warns you about.

It's honest, it's funny. Sometimes it gets a little uncomfortable. But that's kind of the point. This is Cynthia and Josie's unmentionables. Listen on the free IHeart Radio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Hoda Kotby, host of the podcast, Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby. Together, we're going to have meaningful conversations with the world's most fascinating people. Like when actress Olivia Munn shared how she overcame fierce health challenges.

I've gone through breast cancer and then helped my mother through breast cancer, and that was more difficult. There's a lot of people who understand postpartner depression. I was not prepared for postpartum anxiety. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is Michael Rappaport, and my podcast, the I Am Rapaport Stereo podcast, is unlike anyone you've ever heard. We're a variety show. And if you're looking for strong opinions, funny opinions about sports, entertainment, politics, pop culture, and whatever else catches my attention, then subscribe now.

This kid Jafar Jackson is as good as Rami Malik as Freddie Mercury, and it's as good as Timothy Shamaulay as Bob Dylan. And I say that with love and respect for both of those actors. And I don't know how many Oscar nominations they give out, I don't know if it's five, six for Best Actor. 150% this kid Jafar Jackson should absolutely positively get nominated for his portrayal as Michael Jackson. Listen to I Am Rap Report on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your

podcast. I am Rapaport podcast. This Black Music Month, the Questlove show celebrates the artists, innovators, and cultural voices who continue to redefine music. We're sitting down with a groundbreaking country artist, Mickey Guyton. The way that the country music community accepted Post Malone versus Beyond, beyond. say versus Shabuzi, like, those are very eye-op-op-op-visionary, Fat-Five Freddy,

genre-bending musical genius, Thundercat, and the always-legendary revolutionary voice, Chuck D. Yeah, we changed tires, man. I had 18 jobs before this became my occupation, man. Okay. I wrote, I wrote Bar Mursa's show as a messenger. From unforgettable stories to deep conversations about creativity, culture, and legacy.

These are the voices shaping the soundtrack of Black Music present and future. Listen to the Questlove show on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. It pains me to say this, but we have to wrap things up to now. Really? Yeah, we do.

I know. You're going on tour. You're going on your podcast tour. Outlaws is your podcast. And you're going on your very first podcast tour. Okay, so where can they buy tickets? www. www.

www. dot com. Okay, great. And you can catch T.S. Madison on Rupal's drag race, of course. And then Outlaws podcast, TikTok, Fag Talk Live, spelled PHAG. That's right. Fag Talk live, everybody. Yeah, that's popular hot-ass gossippers.

I loved having you. I'm sorry we don't have more time together. Listen, we're going to do something else. We'll do it. Keep in touch with me. I feel that we, there's so much stuff that we can do. if you put ebony and ivory together, what magic will it make?

I want to thank you so much, Chelsea. Yes, yes, of course. I really wish I could have delved deeper. I know. Well, we'll have you back. Yes. And I'll come on yours. We'll make sure we keep a relationship going.

Please. Yes. Because you're an idol of mine. I love you. I love you. Let me give you a hug. Come on. Come on, girl.

Come on. If you want advice from Chelsea, write in to Dear Chelsea podcast at Gmail. dot com. Dear Chelsea is a production of IHeartMedia. Follow Chelsea on all socials at Chelsea Handler and find Catherine on TikTok at Flashcadabra. Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brandon Dickert, executive producer Catherine Law. Find full video episodes and minisodes now on Netflix and get tickets to see Chelsea Live at Chelseahandler.com. Joy is essential and it's also elusive, but now there's a new and exciting way to start your journey toward a more joyful

existence. Joy 101. It's a new podcast hosted by me, Hoda Kotbi. If you're craving inspiration to maximize your joy, tune into these candid, uplifting, and moving on-air chats. Listen to Joy 101 on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby is presented by CVS. Hey, this is Chuck from Stuff You Should Know, and we're submitting our most sciencey episodes for your peer review with our new stuff you should know doing science playlist. Out now. You want to know about Occam's Razor? Simplest explanation is usually the right one?

We got you covered. Wondered what chaos theory is ever since the first time you saw Jurassic Park? Well, come on down. So distill a nice pot of tea, everybody, turn down the gas on your Bunsen burner, and slip into your most comfortable lab coat and listen to the stuff you should know

doing science playlist on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Every family has its secrets. But what happens when you discover that your dad has been living a double life? That is not the look of an innocent man. Is everyone lying to me about who they are? I felt such desperation. I felt it was what I had to do.

Listen to Deep Cover the Family Man on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. June is Black Music Month, and on the drink show, Chams podcast, we're speaking with the hottest names in the culture, like Sway Lee. Do you realize how legendary you are? I appreciate that. I'd be seeing it, but I'm like, man, I still got like so much more to do. Like Prince, he dropped like 30 albums. We dropped like five right now.

Like, that's the rate we got to be going. Yeah, that's a good attitude. No matter the era, Drink Chams brings you the biggest names and the most unfiltered conversations. Listen to Drink Chams from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcast. This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.