Dear Chelsea - Confidence or Confidant?

Episode Date: September 9, 2021

In the season finale, Chelsea and Brandon discuss Chelsea’s new tour and why you should sleep with your roommates while you’re in your 20’s. A Latina filmmaker loses her confidence now that she’s in a new field. A lesbian couple wants to spill the beans about their best friend’s new crush. And a nudist channels her inner Chelsea.  *****The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees. This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all. Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together, our mission on the Really Know Really podcast is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why the bathroom door doesn't go all the way to the floor, what's in the museum of failure, and does your dog truly love you? We have the answer. Go to reallyknowreally.com

and register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. The Really Know Really podcast. Follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Oh, hi, everybody. Hi, everybody. This is a very exciting episode because it's our season finale of season one, which doesn't mean we're leaving you for long because we're just taking a three-week hiatus. And then I will be back. So this is our last episode of this portion of the podcast.

Well, season really. It's the end of season one. And we'll be back in a few weeks with the beginning of season two. I have to say that I had the absolute best time playing the Santa Barbara Bowl. I want to thank everyone who was there. It was such good vibes.

I had tons of friends come out, and I'm just really excited about my stand-up tour. So I wanted to give you guys some more stand-up dates. If you live in Cincinnati, September 30th, I'm coming to Cincinnati. If you live there, get your tickets. I'm coming to Detroit on October 1st. October 2nd, I'm coming to Indianapolis.

That's in Indiana. And then October 3rd, I'm coming to Indianapolis. That's in Indiana. And then October 3rd, I will be in Grand Rapids, Michigan. So I am coming to perform, Taft Theater, Fillmore, Detroit, Detroit, the Marat in Indianapolis, and then Davos Performance Hall in Grand Rapids. And yeah, and if you don't live in one of those cities, I'm probably coming to a city near you. I'm coming to Florida. There's a lot of action in Florida. I'm coming to Portland, Maine. I'm coming to Jacksonville, Miami Beach, St. Petersburg, going to Arizona, Reno, all of my

places. Anyway, look for tickets at ChelseaHandler.com, Ticketmaster, Live Nation, OnlyFans. So I am coming to you. And I hope that you guys come and see my Vaccinated and Horny Tour because it's so much fun. And I go off. It's OG Chelsea. Okay, so we are going to supplement our weeks off with some little nuggets for you to listen to each week. And we have some follow-ups from our callers, which are always, as they say in España, increíble. So I'm very much looking forward to continuing to do this podcast

for all of our loyal listeners, of which we have many. And I want to thank all you guys for listening because you've helped make this a big success. And I am really, really looking forward to continuing on seguimos as they say I took Spanish for three years but I still can only say about seven words because I'm such a good student oh I'm reading this book about autism what is it called a man's guide how to be human a man's guide to living with autism how to be human yeah man's guide to living with autism oh my god it talks about the brain and it talks about like how, you know, there were so many thousands of years where people

didn't know where our brain like they thought our heart was the brain or like the think tank of our body or our liver. And like people didn't understand that the brain and how, you know, it was before science. So nobody could even dissect anything or there's no biology like in that way. So it's fascinating and how like autistic like this guy sees groups of words like go get me a glass of water. It doesn't connect in his mind. Go get me a glass of water like words lined up in an order don't make any sense to him. He's like, I don't I don't understand why you would even say that. So it's just interesting to see how the brain is different. It's like they're just kind of devoid of emotion, you know, which I think is a bonus. I mean, it's direct. You don't ever have

to direct into the point. And it's like, great, that's perfect. But this guy was like, listen, it's so hard to be in your world. Like, imagine the world is built for somebody else, everybody else but you and you're in this world and you want to be part of it, but like you'll never, ever be ordering off of the same menu as everybody else. And he's like, to be a member of society, I have to put the effort forth, even though I don't feel emotional. And he goes, I understand what it means to be a member of society. And I would rather be a member of society than not be. So I have to work twice as hard to be able to communicate and express to people like, hey, I might not react the way you want because I have autism.

That sounds exhausting for him. I know. I know. Yeah, totally. Well, it's going to be changing because now they say like one in four kids is autistic. Well, I think that makes a lot of sense because I mean, think about growing up and there was always kids that were seemed slightly off or seemed like their social cues were off. And like, you know, I remember disregarding people like that, thinking like there was something wrong with them. And it's like, obviously, now we know there's nothing wrong with them. But it's really enlightening to learn about that stuff because I didn't really understand autism. And this book is fucking awesome. Okay, sweetheart, what are we doing today? What's going on? Sweetheart, we are, we're talking about something that you have an abundance of. Well,

people perceive that you have an abundance of this. Breast milk? Confidence. And I would say that you are inherently confident. Would you say that, sweetheart, from personal experience? I would. I think that's something people put on me all the time. They think I have no fear and that I'm super confident. I'm like, where did I don't know where I left that impression. No, see, I can separate those two.

I think that you have a reasonable amount of fear going into some things. Maybe it's a project or an event, but your confidence surpasses your fear. You are confident enough to accept the fear and move forward, which other people aren't. I think that's why people perceive you as being so confident that you'll go into things maybe blindly sometimes. Yeah, right. I have the confidence in my ability to get through it and to make it a positive experience. Yes, I do. I do have that. I believe in myself. A lot of people don't have that. A lot of people have issues in so many aspects of their lives with their confidence, whether it be at work, at home, with their body.

And so I think you're really, I think you're going to have a lot to say for this episode. Yes. Well, that's what we're here for. We're here to build people up, right? We want everybody to be a little bit braver and a little bit more confident. I had to say, I was seeing a patient earlier today on the telephone. I was talking to a friend of mine who was going through something difficult with her daughter, and she really was a hot mess. And I spent about an hour on the phone with her, like her voice was shaking. And there was such fragility in her voice that I was, I just, I felt her pain so much. And then by the time we got off, she was a little bit stronger and a little bit calmer. And I told her to do some serious deep breathing exercises. And so that's an example for me of people in my life that don't have that confidence.

And I just, I wish I could just, you know, you wish you could just inject it. Yeah. I want to get, inject it with a small syringe. One of the syringes I use for my peptides in the morning and just give it to people and be like, here's your confidence shot. You know, everyone has it in them, within them. They just have to tap into it. But I think that you are able to give that to them in a way just by practicing what you preach, that you are able to show them that confidence by doing what you say you're going to do and by operating in a certain way. Like that is powerful for people to see. And we've heard it because people will call in and say that, that through your example, they've been able to find

that strength or that resilience or whatever that is, not tooting your own horn. But I do think it's important that people in our lives set those sort of examples because you really are able to kind of harness your own confidence when you see it through someone else. Well, I just did it also this morning when I was in Beverly Hills because I had to go to a dermatologist to talk about doing something to my under eye skin because it's so crepey. So there's some CO2 laser you can do. And I was over there. My aunt did that to her full face. Oh, and yeah, but it seems like that's a big thing.

Yeah, it was sandblast stuff. I will say the recovery time was very quick for her. That's what I need to talk to you about. She told me I could make the recovery time four days or two weeks. I'm like, that's like when you go into a drugstore and there's yeast infection cure and it's like you have a yeast infection. They're like, OK, here's monistat seven for seven days. And here's the one day. It's like, why the fuck would I want it to go on? Yeah, that needs to be a quick wrap up. Why wouldn't you take the fucking one off? It's so stupid anyway. So we'll talk

about that. I don't know. She said I should do it to my upper eyes and lower eyes to make the skin a little bit tighter there. But that's not my bravery story. That's just me, you know, being vain. I left there and I was in Beverly Hills, which I really don't enjoy being in because it's just I only in the mornings in the afternoons. There's just it's just too much for me. Anyway, I thought, I'm so sick of looking at my purse. This is my opportunity to go to Neiman's and get a new purse because a purse is something that I can't have another person buy for me. And you hate shopping.

I fucking hate shopping. I don't do it. I don't want to do it. And there's nothing of interest to me about it. I wish I could say it interested me just to appease some of my friends of interest to me about it i wish i could say it interested me just to appease some of my friends who like to talk about that sort of thing but i i can't get into it so but i said to myself i was like you can do this like you're an adult you can go there it's only 10 30 it won't be crowded like you know exactly where you go i always just go

straight to the same brand that i always buy which is is not worth mentioning. And I go and I went in and I was like, this is fine. This is fine. You have to go to the bathroom by the time you give them the credit card to do that transaction, which for some reason takes an inordinate amount of time, close to 25 minutes to ring up a fucking purse. I'm not sure what. And then she was rapping. I was like, please, I just want to put everything in my old purse in this purse and you can take this and throw it in the garbage. And I hope that's what she did. Or maybe somebody wanted it.

I doubt it. It was so ugly and beat up. But you did it. Anyway, that was my confidence. I don't really think that applies to what we're talking about. But that was I needed to have the confidence that I could go in, finish the task and accomplish the task without being annoyed that I had to go into, you know, Well, I would argue that it does align with it because it's, we've talked about this as well, that you have to do those little things that make you uncomfortable because it's

filling your confidence bank. Okay. Well, I think my confidence bank is pretty full. So let's fill some other people's confidence banks. All right. Well, let's start with Meg. She is 30 years old. She writes, Dear Chelsea, one of the things I love about you is how confident you come across. This is something I've always struggled with. So I've tried to become a nudist in private to try and be more confident. I know you sometimes post naked posts on social media. So I was wondering if you had any advice on if being naked could help my confidence. Lots of love, Meg. Yeah, I think so. I think there is something to being naked. Hi, Meg. No, she's not on the phone. This is just us. Okay. It's like I still don't understand what we're doing here.

I know the other day you exited off of our Zoom that we need for this because you just... I thought that was how you said goodbye. Yeah, you just wanted to get it wrapped up. Yes. I think there is a lot of confidence that comes with nudity and also accepting your flaws, right? Because I have cellulite. I have all the things that like girls don't like to have. And then you start to look at it and you're like, well, this is kind of part of my life. I mean, I work out and I'm very vain and I'm into being fit and all of that too. So, but it's all like a nice package. And there is something very liberating about walking around nude and kind of like really loving on yourself and loving your body because it's really the only one you've got. So you may as well start to enjoy it. Right. Right. You know,

who does a great job with this is Lizzo. Yeah. If you see any of her posts, she really. And Ashley Graham. Yes. Yeah. I think that there needs to be more of that because this is a good practice to put in place because I think the more you see what you feel is a flaw, the more normalized it becomes. So it's not something that seems so out of place because you're clothed so often. So I guess the more you could be nude to assess and accept your body as it is, the more confident you could become. Yes, agreed. Absolutely. I think also we tend to fixate sometimes on portions of our body like you have been doing with your lower ab thing popping out. We fixate on things and I certainly do the same thing. And then when I was like on Chelsea lately, like I'd be like, can you see that dimple? Can you see that dimple?

I still have that dimple on my arm, but I don't even give a shit about it anymore because I just got over it. So when you are fixated on certain things in your body, it's good to try to like push through to the other side and accept it so that attention can go elsewhere towards like positive vibes towards yourself rather than being like, oh, I fucking hate this part of my body. It's like you're healthy, you're strong and you're getting stronger if you're working towards, you know, getting stronger. Well, I think part of that is also investing energy into the things that you have or the things that you can enhance. So like you have an insane amount of ab strength.

You're just a strong woman. Here we go. Sweetheart is jealous of my ab strength. This're just a strong woman. Here we go. Sweetheart is jealous of my ab strength. This has always been it with you. I just think that if you can reapply that energy into other areas, like for me, maybe my abs are never going to be what I want them to be. But for whatever reason, my chest grows really quickly. And I guess a lot of men have trouble with that. Well, I would like my chest to be as big as yours. So I'll keep working on that. But I think also it's just reapplying that purpose and energy into something else.

Like don't focus. And I'm saying this because I'm working on this as well. Don't focus on the things that your body is not doing for you. Focus on the things that it is doing. Yeah, there you go. Problem solved. Thanks, Meg. Okay, let's go to break for a second so that we can gather and collect ourselves and come back fuller and stronger and more voluptuous. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together on the Really No Really

podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts?

His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Bryan Cranston is with us today. How are you two? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really No Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman.

And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really No Really. Yeah, really. No really. Go to reallynoreally.com and register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. It's called Really No Really and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app,

on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, what's our next submission, Brandon? Our next submission comes from Britney. Spears? We need to talk to her. Well, actually, we need to talk to like... Her dad says she has dementia. He has fucking dementia. Fuck her father. Fuck Britney Spears' father. Give her to her. Well, actually, we need to talk to, like... Her dad says she has dementia. He has fucking dementia.

Fuck her father. Fuck Britney Spears' father. Give her to her mother. Yeah. If somebody's going to have a... She's going to have a conservator, let it be her mother. Yeah, she needs a maternal caretaker. Yeah, seriously.

I mean, she's got dementia. Maybe because he lobotomized her. Could be. Probably injected her with dementia. Is that possible? Poor girl. Poor girl. You know what?

I don't want to have a child, but if somebody said you have to take care of Britney Spears, I fucking would. And she'd probably thrive under your wing. Yeah.

Well, she would get all the help she needs and she would be allowed to do what she wants when she wants and figure out a way for her to get back together with her children.

She doesn't even see her children. There's't even see her children. There's a much different priority in place now for younger stars and their mental health. Like, I think a lot of them are kind of forced to see therapists and forced to take time. They're not workhorses like she was. So it's really interesting to see the Ariana Grande's, the Demi Lovato's, Taylor Swift's, who I think have a better foundation for kind of a work- life balance, even though they seem to be working all the time. Yeah, I mean, Justin Bieber kind of lost his way.

He didn't get a 5150 put on him and put in a mental hospital like this happens to guys, too. So sexist on top of it. I would love a man in charge of a girl. Oh, thank God he's stepping down. Good riddance. Thank you for listening. Well, I mean, I'm not part of the Free Britney tribe, even though I believe in the Free Britney tribe. So thank God for listening, period. And on their behalf and on Britney's behalf. Where were we, Brandon? We're with Britney. Britney is out of Miami. She's 23.

She's on the phone. Her submission says, Dear Chelsea, I've always admired you because of your confidence. I'm very much the same way when it comes to my personal life. I have the confidence of a 6'8 MVP NBA player. That's a mouthful. The problem is now that I am transitioning into adulthood. I realize that I don't have the same confidence in my professional life. I'm currently applying for grad school for film and video production. I know it is a male-dominated profession and I shouldn't let that shake me, but it does. Any advice for a young woman going into a male-dominated industry? Thanks, Brittany. Brittany? Hi.

Hi, Brittany. Hi. So tell us about how do you feel like you're lacking confidence lately as comparable to your previous life? Yeah, I think it's just a mixture of being young and having no experience in the field I want to go into and knowing that like I'm a Latina woman going into this very male dominated industry. And so I find that a little nerve wracking, I guess, even though like in my personal life, I've always never let any of that shake me. I know I've been underestimated for

being a woman, for being Latina, for being all these things, but it's never gotten to me. And I think it's also the transition of going from being a student my whole life to actually being a professional adult. And so, yeah, I think that's my main issue. And what line of work are you in? She's going to grad school for film and video production. Right. Okay. Well, I would say right off the bat, you're in an advantageous position right now. You're Latina. That's a good thing. That's a good thing. Everyone is being forced to recognize Latinx people when they're interviewing for jobs in a way that they haven't been before. And that includes all the men that you're intimidated by. So they actually should be intimidated by you.

So you just need to bring it because you know what I mean? They are listening and you have an advantage to go in there and just knock their socks off. Sorry to use that expression. I sound like my father, but I couldn't think of anything better. Sometimes I sound like I'm elderly, sweetheart. Well, you're entering that stage of life. I am transitioning into an elderly woman. But anyway, Brittany, yeah, you should have all the confidence in the world because you have to use this moment in time is unique for all marginalized communities. You have an advantage now. I know it probably I can't say that across the board because a lot of people are trying to implement that advantage,

but you're going to end up at a place that is actually serious about making change in their company. And so you should use that in accompaniment with your skills, with everything that you're learning in school, like you're ready to hit a home run. So I don't know what the problem is. Yeah, I think it's a mixture of the pressure of like, yeah, all that change is happening. And now I'm being thrown in to that change and to be one of the first.

Growing up, all I saw was, especially in the industry, acting. I never even knew there was a whole behind the scenes side of this career. And I didn't realize that till I was older. And so all I knew was the Latina was the nanny, the maid, the gangster's girlfriend. And like how I was portrayed in that industry kind of took me aback a bit. And so I was like, why is this something I want to go into? And then I think now like I have a chance

to make that difference, to be the person behind the scenes, to make that difference to be the person behind the scenes to make that recognition and I think the pressure of that also might be yeah but what a great motivator you're looking at it as pressure where it's such a great boost you know what I mean it's a boost in like you're gonna set the tone yeah it's a huge, but go in there and make every, every Latina girl proud of you and pave the way for them to follow in your footsteps. Huge opportunity here. Brandon? Yeah, well, and some people can perform and thrive under pressure, and I bet you're one of those people.

I think so, too. I think you need to believe that you're one of those people first. So you just need to accept that for what it is. The pressure is not a bad thing. The pressure, like Chelsea said, is going to motivate you to do your best to get the representation for the community that you weren't fortunate enough to see. Like the momentum is working in your favor right now. And I don't know exactly what you want to do, but I just want to tell you about someone that we both work with. Her name is Darling Higgins, and she is one of the most like respected people in her field. She works behind the scenes.

She is Venezuelan. She is a badass bitch. And she does not take shit. She's the best. She does not take shit from anyone. And she is the best at her job. People seek her out. And you don't know her. But the example that she sets for other women in the industry, that you can do anything you want to do.

And you can be that for someone else. So that's what you need to remember. Is that just because you've not seen it or you've not had it doesn't mean you're and you can be that for someone else. So that's what you need to remember is that just because you've not seen it or you've not had it doesn't mean you're not going to be that for someone else. So take that responsibility and run with it. Like you're going to thrive. Yes, you are going to thrive.

I already know this. But the other thing is, yes, to just piggyback on what Brandon said is that when you don't have the strength for yourself, think about the girls that are going to come behind you. You know, think about having the strength for them. And then it becomes so easy. Yeah.

I mean, that makes a lot of sense. I've known this, like I know this, like this makes sense to me. I've always been this way as a student and as a person in my friend group. And I think now I need to transfer that over to my professional life. Well, I think in your youth, too, we've talked about this. Everyone has a misplaced amount of confidence. So now you just kind of have to reassess that and compartmentalize it into what you're doing now. So you know that you have that confidence within you. You just need to apply it as you move forward professionally.

Like it's still there. It's still in you. It it's inherent so don't let it fall to the wayside just because you're going into something a little bit unknown like if anything let it give you the extra boost that you need yeah you just need to calibrate your previous confidence which is more of a naive confidence right your previous confidence with all the skills that you're learning and the education that you've gotten and combine those two things and then you have all the skills that you're learning and the education that you've gotten and combine those two things. And then you have all the tools that you need to power through this and to, you know, emerge victorious and to set a great example along the way.

Like it's so much to look forward to. I'm excited for you. Oh, thank you. Yeah. Please keep us posted. Let us know how it goes. Yeah, for sure. I'll be starting in the fall.

So where are you starting? Do you know what grad school you're be starting in the fall. Congratulations. So where are you starting? Do you know? What grad school you're starting? Yeah. Yeah, okay. Well, that's going to be fun too. Grad school. Good for you.

Congratulations. Thank you. Thank you, Brittany. All right. Thank you for having me. Bye, Brittany. Bye. Oh, God.

I look like Nick Nolte again. Would you like to go to grad school? Yes, actually. Oh, my God. It's so funny you say that because I was driving this morning and I was like, God, I'd fucking like to go take some classes at college. You should. I know, but I wouldn't actually ever go. But why not?

Because I don't want to be in a classroom with a bunch of people. I don't know why. But you love people. I know, but I just don't. I don't want that kind of attention. I think you should have that sort of life experience. I think that it would mean a lot to you. You want to send me away to college, sweetheart? I just think it would mean a lot to you to be able to go and get an education because you are, you are so self-educated

that I really do think that even if you do it later in life, like there was this woman, I think she went to ASU. I can't remember, but she was 81 and she graduated with her granddaughter. Maybe we could go back to school together. Maybe I should.

Well, first of all, if I'm going to have a granddaughter, I need to have a daughter first. And if I'm going to graduate from college with my granddaughter, I think it's a fucking

little late for that. Well, no, we still have time. OK, listen, the doctor said my eggs are really strong or whatever they are. I don't know how many eggs I have, but apparently they're swimming fast. Or is that sperm?

That's sperm. Whoopsie. So if I have a baby now, 46. Okay, I'd have to get pregnant. And then the pregnancy would have to take, which it will because I'm so fucking fertile. Okay, so then 47, I have a baby, plus 18 equals 65. 65, if I have a baby and I can engineer it to be a girl, force her to have another baby,

by the time I'm 65, I can have a granddaughter and then another 18 years, I'm going to have to have my daughter have a baby earlier than 18. Well, I think that you, we could skip a few of these steps. You adopt like a late in life foster. Like Britney Spears.

Yes, perfect. She already has kids. So you can graduate with one of her kids. With Preston. She has one named Preston. I know that for sure. Preston and Jaden. Okay, great.

Problem solved. Oh God. Okay. I should have called into the podcast. You still can. Our next submission comes from Melissa. She solved. Oh, God. I should have called into the podcast. You still can. Our next submission comes from Melissa. She's 46 out of Toronto. She is a travel radio host.

A travel radio host. I wonder if that means that she travels or her radio show is about travel. We'll find out. Her question is, Dear Chelsea, I was caught between the working world and all of its perks and saying screw it to city life and living closer to the outdoors, making less money and throwing caution to the wind. We are the same age. I'm ready for a change. I love to travel. I love adventures. I have multiple talents that I use in my non-financial passion projects as a writer, podcaster and interviewer. But I haven't figured out my entrepreneurial angle that will enable me to give the big middle finger to corporate life.

What do I do? Do we have Melissa? Yeah, looks like. Hi, Melissa. Hi, how's it going? It's going. How's it going with you? I am not too bad.

That is always a good sign, right? So you're in Canada? Yes, I'm in Toronto. Okay, and you have a traveling radio show. What does that mean? So about five years ago, I started a show called Fly Travel Radio. So it's on a community radio station, but it's also a podcast. So I'm basically a one woman operation. I created it. I'm the host, interviewer, editor, all of the above, all of it. So that's my passion project. On the side though, in my nine to five, I work at a university. So I'm in like project event program management and like the golden handcuff job,

so you have good pay, good benefits, good perks, but it's not fulfilling your soul or your destiny or anything like that. So it gets to be a hard time, right? When you're like, do you stay for the security or do you create your own path and bolt and just like find your own freedom? And I talk a lot in my show, I meet all these people who have done that, right? They've left like traditional nine to fives and they have location independent businesses. So if you wanted to go and live in Costa Rica for three months, you can go and do that if your laptop is with you or live in a ski town for a winter, right? It's like that freedom and that ability to control your own life.

Right. So a couple of questions. Are you in a relationship? Yes, I am. Okay. So what does that mean to you? Is that something you're willing to give up and leave or is that person coming with you? No, he would come with me. He's also pursuing a voice work and he's a huge traveler as well. So that we share together. Oh, well, that's even better. That's a fun time for an adventure. You have a couple, like as somebody you want to do it with that feels like, yeah, I mean, I'm all about taking a leap of faith. So I would encourage anyone to just, you know, be able all about taking a leap of faith. So I would encourage

anyone to just, you know, be able to go out and see the world. You could do your one man operation, your one woman operation from wherever, right? You can do your podcast and radio show from wherever you are in the world. Absolutely. It's just it's all volunteer, right? So it's more that I have to create a business that's lucrative where there's some cash because, you know. Right. So you have to go somewhere and find another job and you don't really know what you want to do, right? Actually, you know what? I have a lot of things like I can write, I can interview, I'm good at people management, project management. There's a lot of things in my wheelhouse. I just

have to figure out how to monetize it. And yeah, like when you're 46, right, you have this, it's a dividing line where you're like, do you bolt or do you just suck it up for a few more years? But I'm pretty sure it's, you know, life is short and there's always a chapter for new, a new way to live. So that's where we're at. Yeah. That's the right attitude. I think that's my attitude. I don't want to suck anything up. You know what I mean? I really just don't, I don't want to. And if you have the ability to not do it, you have money saved where you could go somewhere and like, like, could you bounce around the world for three or six months and find a place that you really like and then worry about getting a job? Do you have that kind of savings or no? Yeah, yeah, I do. Yeah. Yeah. So then I

think you have your answer. I mean, you need to get after it. It's true. It's true. What do you think? I think you need to embrace the unknown. I think that this last year has really shown a lot of people that time is of the essence, like you have to get out and do the things you want to do now because we don't know what's coming. And there are a lot of options for online work right now that you can just contract in for. Like there's I keep seeing this website for people to type out closed captioning because everyone is in need of closed captioning now for inclusivity and you get paid by the word. So some people are making like $500 per post that they closed caption. So yeah, they will send you, they will send you the video and you have to transcribe it. So I just think that there are a lot of ways now to make money remotely.

You can work for Apple remotely. You can do the AppleCare services. I used to work for Apple, so I know that. And they pay great. And you can kind of set your hours for that. So again, if it's just about getting out and having your own schedule and being on your own time, there are a lot of ways to do that now. Yeah, I would agree. I think quarantine and

COVID have broughten. I just said broughten. Don't do the transcribing. Yeah, maybe I won't do the transcribing. I mean, here I am, a regular wordsmith constantly fucking up my words. Yeah, I mean, it's been brought to light that you can now pretty much do almost everything from home. Yeah, I know. I mean, so many more places and companies are opening up to this, and there are so many little loopholes. For example, in Costa Rica, they just passed legislation to attract more digital nomads. They changed the law so you wouldn't have to renew your tourist visa for a year with the option of renewing for a second year versus every three months. So now you'll also be able to legally drive using your driver's license from your own country and open

a bank account in Costa Rica, which is pretty great. So there's no shortage of opportunities. It's just about finding the right opportunities. It's kind of analogous to getting scholarships at schools. Like there's all these ins and outs for every university to get funding or to get help with scholarships or housing money. Like, you know, and there are people who specialize in telling students, oh, this is how you can save money here. You can get this loan. People just don't know how to utilize all those services. I was just having a conversation with somebody yesterday. She's like, oh my God, you can almost get everything paid for. You just have to have somebody who knows their way around it. But I think that applies to so many things in life. There are so many avenues to get revenue and ways to accrue revenue that you

don't even know about just yet. So if you did spend some time researching that, I'm sure you'd come up with something that kind of fits your skill set. Well, it's also not permanent. So like Chelsea said, if you wanted to go away for three or six months, even a year, if you have the means to do that, you can always go back. You're obviously articulate and skilled in your field. So I don't think you'd have a problem getting a job back. But if you don't ever take the step to kind of put yourself out of your comfort zone, you're going to wonder. Absolutely. Totally. The other thing that goes with this is that- You're pregnant? Yeah, pregnant yeah totally 46 loving it no I'm not I I'm trying to get pregnant right now it's not easy I thought so yeah I have

organized this year off with my employer right but if you do that it's like a get out of jail free card for a year because you can go but you have to come back to like this job. So this is like also part of the dilemma where I'm just like, oh, yeah, right. I'm done. Yeah. Well, I think that's your answer. You're done, right? You know your answer. I do. Yeah. Well, it seems like you solved your own issue. Well, it was really helpful. Thank you very much. Okay. It was nice talking to you. Yeah, you too.

Take care. Another problem solved, sweetheart. People just want to be transients. That's what I've realized. Everyone is searching for a way to not have a normal job. I know. I know. And I understand it.

It's so nice to have freedom, you know, to be free. Like even my sister, she works all day long. She's on Zooms, one Zoom and then another Zoom. And it's all about health care and like biotech. And I mean, I don't know how she does it. And, you know, she takes her job seriously, obviously. I don't. But, you know, she can basically do it from anywhere. But now they're talking about everyone going back into the office. Why are they doing that? So now she's like, I've got to go everywhere I can go now before they're requiring us to be back. So she can do it from wherever. I don't know. I don't know why people are doing that. But I guess there is something to be said, obviously, for socializing and having a network of people in an office working towards the same goal or a common goal.

And, you know, there is a camaraderie in that. You can't deny that. But it should be up to the individual if they want to be involved in that kind of chicanery, because a lot of people don't want to be around other people. I wonder how that will work with television as the way of the future. I mean, I feel like they got so good at producing things remotely that there's not like Drew Barrymore, her show. They basically teleport guests in so people don't even have to show up anymore. And it looks great. Yeah, it looks like you're sitting right next to her. I think I did it, didn't I? Maybe I did it when I was at Zoom. Yours was at Zoom, but you had the option.

It didn't work out. But yeah, it seems like there are going to be a lot of ways to get people still working together remotely. There is a platform where they set up an artificial office space and you can click on people's rooms like you're walking into their office and it will start their camera. Like you have to allow for that to happen, But you set certain office hours so you know people are there working as a team. And you can use this online grid to immediately contact people like as if you were just walking right through the door. house so that you don't have to see her no uh so that she doesn't have to see me oh well she would love that i know that's what i'm trying to do is help her enjoy herself more without me there she sees me and she's just like fuck so what do you think about ellen's show ending do you think it's time just as just as a creative person that like you hit your mark with chelsea lately and then you could not do it anymore no no but I have a short I have a very short tolerance. I mean, she's been doing it almost 20 years.

Yeah. Yeah. No, it's time. I mean, anytime you end something, then that's the time it should end. Well, and you said recently that you would possibly be interested in going back into interviewing people. You want me to be Ellen's replacement? I would love if you were Ellen's replacement. I think that should go to a woman of color, quite honestly. Well, I love your interview style. And I think a lot of people do and miss it. Oh, sweetheart, you're all over me today. Oh, my God. You forget I was a fan first. And sometimes that comes out. But now you think that you could do it again. You could stomach the celebrity interviews. I don't know. I don't know.

I say things and I don't know necessarily if I've thought things through. I mean, yeah, I would be open to a conversation about hosting a TV show again, but I know what my limits are and I know what my attention span is, and I'm not going to be tied down to a studio. Short. Yes, short. I'm not going to be tied down to being in a studio five days a week. Like that wouldn't be my cup of tea. I don't want to go through that again. And I don't like having a staff of 100 people. So like when I hosted Ellen's show, which it was a great time, but that's because it was I walking into a well-oiled machine. Everything was set up for you. It's not building the show. There's no sense of responsibility other than the episodes I'm on, you know, like it comes with a whole package. So it is a deeper, more thoughtful.

I would have to really think about that. But anyway, that show specifically, if they're going to keep it, should go to a black or Asian or Latina woman. You heard it here first, you guys. I'm glad we got that out of the way. OK, so we are going to take a break right now and gather our emotions. And you come back and we're going to be fresher. Fresh as a daisy. That's me. Bye. like why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal?

The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Brian Cranston is with us today. How are you, too? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic

Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really No Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really No Really. Yeah, really. No really. Go to reallynoreally.com and register to win $500,

a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. It's called Really No Really, and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Today's episode, I think, is about confidence, right? It's about keeping confidence, keeping someone's confidence, or it's about having confidence. So it's kind of like a twofold episode. Well, twofold meaning, I should say. It's not a twofold episode. I don't even know what I'm talking about.

But keeping someone's confidence and having someone's confidence, those even are nuanced. And then also being confident. And I like this subject of discussion because I think it's really contagious when people understand how to instill their own self-confidence. And keeping someone's confidence, I don't know how I would rate my performance on that. I try and keep secrets. I mean, I'm pretty good about it. I try not to tell secrets, other people's secrets. Confidence is a subject matter that I always love to talk about because I just think it's so important. And obviously, it makes a difference in your life because when you are confident, people respect that and they understand that. And like, you know, you set a different set of parameters for people to deal with you. So it's in everybody's best interest to figure out ways to kind of, you know, talk yourself up to yourself. All right. Our final submission comes. Oh, it's a double duo. It is Ashley and Courtney. They write they are not on the phone. Dear Chelsea, my girlfriend and I are trying to resolve the sexual tension between one of our best friends and one of our new friends

who also happens to be her roommate. OK, so this is going to be some... We're going to have to piece this together. Maybe I'm going to start drawing a picture. Our best friend is afraid to tell her of her deep love because she doesn't want to ruin their friendship, but we secretly want them to be together and truly cannot stand the tension. It's slightly complicated because the new friend slash roommate

is casually sleeping with someone, but has been clear that they aren't exclusive and also keeps trying to hold on to our best friend's hand. Should we spill the secret during a drunken night to get it over with? We need help. Yeah, totally get it out. You guys have to go tell that girl,

the one that she has a crush on, you have to find out, is she into it? Is she down with her? Is she interested in her? And if she is, like, let's get a move on. So as friends, go help your one friend out, go to the other girl, the roommate, and figure it out. And if she's down, then don't get it twisted. Problem solved. That was easy.

That was really in your wheelhouse today, sweetheart. Sometimes people, I think, this is how I feel about friendship. I feel like you want to take the liberty to go out of your way to help your friend succeed. Yeah. So all friends should be that kind of friend. I know some people aren't like that. They're like, oh, I don't want to overstep. It's like, no, no, no. There's no such thing.

When you're trying to help somebody achieve something, like friend and whistler worked very very very hard to get me penetrated she was like you will not leave whistler this winter until you get penetrated and i was like thank you i'm like i really appreciate your efforts on my behalf you know she she just wouldn't take no for an answer and every guy that she presented if i didn't like him she's like okay no problem i'll find someone else i'll find someone else. I'll find someone else. And then finally, she did find somebody that I was able to be penetrated by a few times. So that to me was such a display. Talk about the marble jar, right? Talk about putting marbles in the marble jar and saying, oh, wow, that friend went out of her way for me to a degree that I haven't had a friend do

that for me in a really long time. And I was really appreciative of that. So we've talked about the marble jar before, but I love it. It's Brene Brown wrote about it or spoke about it first, how friendship is a marble jar and how people add to the marble jar with every act of kindness or love or reliability or whatever, you know, you value in your friendships. Every time they do something or you have a great time, there's more marbles. And anytime they do something that you don't like, a marble gets taken out. But if you have a great friendship,

there are so many marbles in the jar that nothing can break that. You're never gonna be low on marbles. It's like laying a foundation, basically. And I love it because it's so true in so many of my relationships. Like, you don't leave a relationship when the marble jar is full. Anyway, that's the marble jar. So, you know, that makes me also want to go out of my way for her. But she has a husband, so it probably won't be penetration.

Right. But I can go out of my way for her in other ways. And but that to me is a real, real true friend. People like to make things way more complicated than they need to be. I've realized through some of these submissions like that to me seemed very simple. You go to and you don't have to be drunk. You go to your friend, say this is what's going on. Just like full transparency so you can set reasonable expectations for yourself. Don't let her go into these things unknowingly, you know, interacting when you're aware of a circumstance. And also, even if it turns into a messy situation, it sounds like

they're younger, right? Yeah, probably. Yeah. Even if it turns into a messier situation, like, okay, so they hook up and then it ends badly. That's what your 20s are for. Fucked up living arrangements. I mean, I've slept with roommates before and it hasn't ended well. Like it's all kind of part of it. So it's not like there's huge stakes. I guess maybe moving apartments do sound like the huge stakes, but I would say that's no fun. It's fun to, you know, experiment, especially with your roommates and yeah, go for it. Well, that's convenience right there. Yeah, that is convenience because you imagine in a success story like the good if it doesn't work out that sucks but if it does work out that's awesome yeah you can send them back to their room after getting penetrated

that seems nice the moral of the episode is that everybody needs to tell themselves something good about yourselves every fucking morning when you wake up and then keep repeating that if you like your eyelashes start there if you like your hair your ears your boobs or your arm whatever it is your personality i said all physical things that's terrible i mean if you like your ability to remember names that's a good one uh things that people like if you have an ability to make people laugh. Right. Or if you are somebody who is really, really loyal, you know, focus on that. Just everybody needs to remember that they're valuable and that they're unique and that

there is no one else on this earth that is exactly like you. So bring it. And that's all I have to say about that. Okay. I've made my opinions and declarations loud, clear, and I'm sick of them. As our season finale wraps up today in this episode, I'm feeling large amounts of gratitude for this unexpected podcast for me because I didn't really set out for it to be serious, as serious as it is.

I hope that it's funny to all of you people as well, because I do want to make you laugh. But I thought it would be more funny and less serious. And it's become more serious. So I am really like pleasantly surprised by that and not disappointed at all. It's like totally unexpected for me to go in that direction. And I just love the challenge. And I love really having this connection with people because I really have seen so many people just kind of trust me. And I want you to know, like, I do have your back.

That's what I'm doing. And I'm so grateful that people are taking our advice and also doubling back with us to recheck in is so meaningful because we have a measurable stick of progress. And also for all of our callers, I just want to remind you that if you've called in and we've helped you, please follow up with us. I love to hear follow up calls. I love to hear progress reports, see how you're doing. If you guys don't remember, Shane was one of our follow up callers who called back who had taken a week off of smoking or a month off of smoking pot with me. We both did it together. And then he came out to his family as trans and his whole life is different now. So we want to hear from you about the progress that you've made. And when I say keep in touch, I mean it. So we will be coming

right back with season two. We will not leave you hanging. We will be dropping little nuggets for you. So look out for them, please. And Brandon is moving on to a new job. And so he will no longer be with us. But I want to thank him very much for helping to get this podcast off the ground and starting it with such a bang. I'm going to have a variety of different co-hosts come in,

people who are experts in certain fields and friends of mine. And I look forward to keeping this podcast going. I'm loving it, you guys. So thank you so much to all of our listeners. And I hope you keep listening and that you spread the word and you spread the good vibes

and that we all know that everybody's always dealing with something. So just try not to be an asshole. Bye-bye. Have a great day. If you want any assistance with your partner, your best friend, really anything, you can write in to DearChelseaProject at gmail.com. DearChelseaProject at gmail.com. Also, I am on tour. You can buy tickets at Ticketmaster for my shows, and I can't fucking

wait. It's called Vaccinated and Horny. So make sure that you bring your vaccinations and your horniness, and then keep them to yourself, please. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together, our mission on the Really Know Really podcast is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why the bathroom door doesn't go all the way to the floor, what's in the museum of failure, and does your dog truly love you? We have the answer. Go to reallyknowreally.com

and register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. The Really Know Really podcast. Follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.