Dear Chelsea - Having a Felch with Toni Collette

Episode Date: December 25, 2025

Actress Toni Collette (Wayward, Goodbye June) joins Chelsea to talk about why Rome is her happy place, what it feels like to get your character wrong, and finding her inner creep for her role as a cult leader.  Then: A baby actor struggles to leave his family to pursue his career.  A stepmom struggles to connect with her stepdaughter after a sibling is born.   And a sister’s tactless behavior results in an awkward confrontation. * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brad Dickert * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Visit givedirectly.org slash happiness lab to learn more and to donate. That's give directly.org slash happiness lab. Hi, I'm Radhi Dvlukaya and I am the host of a really good cry podcast. This week, I am joined by Anna Runkle, also known as the crappy childhood fairy, a creator, teacher, and guide helping people heal from the lasting emotional wounds of unsafe or chaotic childhoods. That talking about trauma isn't always great for people. It's not always the best thing. About a third of people who are traumatized as kids feel worse when they talk about it. Get very disregulated. Listen to a really good cry on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. I just announced all my tour dates. It's called the High and Mighty Tour. I'm coming.

Washington, D.C., Norfolk, Virginia, Madison, Wisconsin, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Detroit, Michigan, Cleveland, Columbus, and Cincinnati, Ohio, Denver, Colorado, Portland, Maine, Providence, Rhode Island, Springfield, Massachusetts, Chicago, of course. Indianapolis, Indiana, Louisville, Kentucky, Albuquerque, Mesa, Arizona, Kansas City, Missouri, St. Louisville, Missouri, Minneapolis, Minnesota, Nashville, Tennessee, Charlotte, North Carolina, Durham, North Carolina. Carolina, Saratoga, California, Monterey, California, Modesto, California, and Port Chester, New York, Boston, Massachusetts, Portland, Oregon, and Seattle, Washington. I will be touring from February through June, so go get your tickets now. If you want to come see me perform, I will be on the high and mighty tour. Merry Christmas, Catherine. It's Christmas Day. Merry Christmas, Chelsea. I'm so excited. Jesus was born today, or he does. died today. He was born, so they say. I'm so excited about Christmas, guys. I am such a holiday person. I have a lot of gifts under my tree, though, because I have poopsies and whoopsies and

oopsies coming my way, so I've got to gift them all with their boyfriends now. They both have boyfriends and the boyfriends have sleepovers. So my house has turned into basically, I don't know, I guess, a sex house. I mean, right. Is it like, it's obviously not separate bedrooms. Is it leave the door cracked? No, I'm not. You know what? I just let everybody do their thing. Everybody just, I don't, you know what, I'm not the parent. I don't make the rules. They're big girls. Whatever.

When at Chelsea's house? Yeah, yeah, come on over. Have a good time. By the way, I have like eight people staying at my house for like three nights. I don't know. I don't have enough room. So people are going to be sleeping with strangers. I got to tell you, instead of an air mattress, I don't know if you have these.

But Coleman makes cots that are actually very comfortable to sleep on. I will send you a link. Well, I mean, I have the space. It's just that people are going to have to sleep in bunk beds. that don't know each other. And like, I don't have a big house here. Yeah, I always have bunk beds. Always in every house.

Smart. In all of my homes. So who's our guest today? Oh, yes. We have another one of my favorite actors is on today. She's an actor and a singer and a songwriter. She has two new projects that you can catch her in the show Wayward with May Martin and her new movie, Goodbye June.

And they're both on Netflix. So please welcome Tony Colette. And here we are with Tony Colette. Oh, my God. One of my favorite people, actresses, I love you. I love you, too. And I hope you know how passionately I feel about your, I mean, listen, I'm not alone. So I can't claim that I discovered you or I have some special way to see you because everybody loves you since we first found out about you.

I think. Oh, my God. The gloom. I know, I know. It's such a great introduction. I can't stop talking. Yeah, keep going, baby. I can't stop waxing poetically about you.

My introduction to you was Muriel's wedding, which. of course is, you know, I mean, I still quote that movie along with millions of other people. But in the past few years, you have been churning shit out, sister. You have been working your ass off. I've been lucky, yeah. Yeah, you are. Yeah, it's nice to be working and it's nice to be appreciated for the actor that you are. Wow, that's, that is an incredible introduction. Thank you so much. Far out. You're welcome. You're welcome and you deserve it. Well, I am a fan of yours also, as you know, for those who don't know, we do DM each other on Instagram. We have a kind of a funny little friendship going on. And I'm so, I actually thought we were going to be

together that, of course you're in Whistler, because I've read your book and that's where you like to be. But yeah, right back at you. I really, really align with much of what you espouse. Yes, we're both very political too. We both are very much about posting and making sure people know how we feel. So I, of course, respect anyone who stands up for shit. So, and I know you do. And you've actually turned me on to a couple of different Instagram accounts that I started following when I saw you post about them. So thank you for that. Yes. Well, and most recently, you stood up for Paul Dano during this whole, like, weird. Yeah, what was that? What's this? Quentin Taritino needs to shut the fuck up.

Isn't he already in trouble from a couple of years ago? Like, why is he feeling free about going after people? It's pretty weird. And also, Paul is incredibly talented and the most beautiful person. Who does that? Where does it come from? It's pretty confusing, actually. What did you say about Paul Dano? Oh, I just posted an image from that scene that I have with him in Little Miss Sunshine, which, by the way, is 20 years old. There's an anniversary screening at Sundance next month. Oh, that's so cool.

That was a great fucking movie. It's a great movie. And he's wonderful in it. And there's that moment where his character is so passionate about becoming a pilot. And then when he realizes he can't realize that dream, he freaks out on our road trip, pops out of the car, runs down. into a bit of a valley and has a breakdown and I go down to try to communicate with him

and it's completely heartbreaking and he's wonderful and all I did was post that image from the scene and pop a little crown on his head. That was it. Now he's an incredible actor. He's wonderful. What was that movie that he did with Patricia? That series he did with Patricia Arca.

Escape from Danamora. Oh God, that was so good. Should I be watching that? Yes. Oh my God, yes. You need to see Paul Dano in that movie. Okay. It's about a prison escape and there's like a torrid love affair

It's so fucked up. It's so good. It kind of reminds me of the staircase, Tony. Oh, really? It's as fucked up as the staircase. Oh, I know what your favorite scene is in the staircase. Are you referring to that? I think that's how we first connected. Yeah. It was. I posted a seat. Do you want to describe the scene? Why don't you describe it? No, I would love you two, actually. What's your take on it? This is a great scene in the staircase, you guys, which is based on a true story, right?

Yes, it is. Tony plays the wife and what's the actor's name that plays your husband. Colin Firth. Colin Firth, right. Colin Firth is like accused of murdering his, or, you know, it's up in the air. People don't know what happened, you know. It could have been him or it could have been an attack by fucking birds. Yeah.

So, there's a scene in this movie. It seems plausible the owl attack for quite some time. Yeah. Until I realized that that talent mark changes when they actually grab onto what they're aiming for. So it didn't quite match up. with that mark on the back of her head. Yeah, right. So it wasn't a bunch of birds.

It was an owl. Either she got attacked by an owl that led to her death or her husband pushed her down the stairs. So you decide just by listening to this podcast what happened. But there is a scene in this movie where, first of all, it's incredible. I mean, it's a series, not a movie. It's a great series, incredible series by Antonio Campos. There's a scene where Tony's in the kitchen, her character is in the kitchen. But so is Tony.

Just cooking it up. And then my husband has some gay tendencies. And he wanders in and decides to just, you know, whip my pants down and have a good old felch. Yeah, a fulch. That's a new one for me. Yeah, it's a new one for all of us. I mean, I was so petrified about doing that. And poor Kate, my costume, I had to come in and, like, pack the crack of my ass with, like, all kinds of protective stuff.

So Colin didn't have to, you know, actually eat ass. Right. You know what's so funny? It's like there, I don't know of any other ass eating scene in any series that I've ever seen. So I could, because Patrick Schwarzenegger, another person who's in this, in this series, he and I, because he died when I posted that because we're friends and friends with their family. And he was just like, oh my God. I go, it's just so out of the blue. All of a sudden, there's an ass eating scene in the middle of this, this drama about murder.

And it's very unexpected and shocking. It was revealing about his character and what he was into and that, you know, what their relationship might have entailed. And what your character was willing to accept in your relationship as well, or welcome, I should say. Yeah, I think she was into it, actually. Yeah, I didn't know that that was called felching. I know about boofing, but I didn't know about felching. What's a boof? Now I know.

Is it an Aussie, is that an Aussie slang or is that vernacular? I think it's vernacular. But what's boofing? That's a word for the same thing? Boofing is when you stick something up somebody's butt And it's just like Like alcohol or drugs, right? Usually?

Yeah, I think it's like a popper or alcohol or drugs You can just like use your butt And it's called a boof. I only know this because I was at a conference In Antarctica recently Where I was on stage Talking about my love of psychedelics And someone said, how do you feel about booffing?

And you didn't know what it was You're like, what? I actually had heard about it. Hang on Antarctica. Had you been there before? I really had to go. No. Was it absolutely phenomenal?

Yeah, it was a dream. Did it make your heart just like, expand? It made me want to stay there until this administration is over. I was like, you know what, they said, listen, you're coming at this point. Yeah, they said you're coming at the best time. It's light out for two months. This is our summer. But it was majestic, Tony.

Like the icebergs, when you're sailing, like you're on this vessel, obviously, you're going through Antarctica from Eushuea, we took this boat, and you're going and they see the first patch of icebergs in the distance. it's like a scene out of Titanic where they see the iceberg but it's so massive it's like a land mass you know they're not like

just little icebergs there are those as well but the first one that you see when you pass like 60 latitude is like jaw-dropping yeah you're just like and you're watching it for like a day because you keep getting closer

and closer and closer so it was pretty spectacular how did you get invited there how does one get invited there you have to be in psychedelic I just don't know another one of those you know silly little situations that I said

silly Bloody wonderful. Good for you. Okay, so let's talk about a couple things, Tony. First, I didn't know that you were the first person on the BBC to have an orgasm. What? Oh, in Wonderlast. I didn't know that either. But they made a very big deal of that.

Well, because it was the first one. Hang on, was it first female or like... Maybe first female. Men are allowed to have them left and right. I'm sure men were having lots of orgasms. Yeah, I forgot about that. Well, how can you be proud of it? How can you be proud of it if I just told you about it and you didn't even know you were the first?

No, I just forgot about it. I did not about it. She's a busy woman. I didn't. I don't think of it every day. But, yeah, that show, Nick Payne's writing is incredible. He's kind of a bit of a prolific playwright and dabbles in TV and film and he can write anything, really. I just love.

What I love about his writing is that all the space in between the words is so jam-packed with all kinds of information for you to mind. He's a beautiful, beautiful writer. And that show was incredibly liberating for that character, potentially just for women in general. She was a woman who was discontented in her marriage and wanted to explore things sexually outside of the marriage and they decide to open up their relationship and everything that goes with it.

It was really complex and beautiful. I loved it. I really hoped we'd do another season, but it didn't quite fly. Maybe the female orgasm freaked the audience out. Who knows? They probably weren't ready for that. It takes about a thousand years after a male orgasm for anyone to accept a female orgasm. Yeah, they exist.

Sorry. Not sorry. So you grew up in Australia, right? Yeah, in Sydney, yeah. In Sydney, my favorite place. That's my favorite harbor in the world because there's no shipping containers. It is very beautiful. Yeah.

It's very pretty. Yeah. My kids and I, we all got our boating licenses recently. Oh, wow. That's cool. And it felt so, like, freeing and adventurous. Sometimes I do. things and I'm doing it for a role and this was just like we want to do it and it was just the

coolest so yeah I can scoot around the harbor now oh my god how fun and so is your daughter leaving for school soon she's she's actually got the rest of year 12 to go so yeah so you have one year to adjust yeah to that situation I'm kind of she's incredibly creative and I'm I am supportive of anything my kids want to do and so I don't know whether that's the trajectory she'll follow or aim for you know and all roads lead to Rome at this point it doesn't seem to be it doesn't have to be that yeah yeah I know what you're going to say for you all roads do leads to yeah they really do yeah you love Rome you're always in Rome yeah well I worked there I did a film called Mafia Mama which kind of was misreleased it was kind of a bummer because the film's

bloody brilliant it's so funny and we had a ball making it and I mean I'd always been to Italy. I think I was actually talking to someone last night. The first time I went there was on the shaft press tour. It was one of those big junk like press tours where you go to all the countries and everything's laid on that doesn't happen anymore. And then, uh, I married a guy whose family was Italian, so we would be, you know, in and out all over Italy. But then I got to live and work in Rome in 2022 and absolutely. I was like, this is my place. This is where my greatest joy lives. And I just try to get there as often as I can. I absolutely love it. I've got a life there and friends and, and Oh, isn't that so nice?

Yeah, it really very, it very much is. I'm so grateful for it. I can totally relate. That's how I feel about Whistler and, like, in myorka. I mean, I don't really have a lot of friends in my Erica, which I kind of like. I'm like, this is nice. It's just me and myself with my thoughts, which I need more time with. So you have two projects that we're talking about because one is Wayward, which is a show

that just came out, May Martin stars in. Also, May Martin created. They are a great comedian. They do a podcast, Handsome Pod, with two friends of mine, Tiggin, and and fortune. Tell us about how you got involved in that project. It was out of the blue. I just was told about this script. It was sent to me. I read it and I was kind of blown away. In a way, maybe it was undersold to me, but I was like, this is actually really amazing. And so I was intrigued. I didn't know where it was going and it really goes to places that you can't really assume at

the beginning. So I remember having a Zoom with both May and the other showrunner, Ryan, And I was just struck by Mays, which is hilarious now that I know them, because they just seemed so calm and clear and articulate. And May's not like that at all. Were they nervous to talk to you? Apparently, yes. We're thick as thieves now, so, you know, it's cool. And actually, there was another job that came up at the same time, which was somewhat coveted.

And it became a bit of a dilemma. They were both on Netflix. And I was like, oh, maybe we can, like, work it out schedule-wide. and that really wasn't going to work, which I still don't understand, but I ended up doing wayward and there's part of me like, okay, this is happening for a reason, show me what this is, and it ended up being the most profound experience, really, really fun and really meaningful. Like, it just was a good time, a good time was had by all, like, a, you know, a proper, a connected time with both the cast and the crew, and that cast of, like, you know,

multi-generational cast and just it was so brave. I think May is this incredible unicorn who's creative in all kinds of very impressive and admirable ways. And I'm really, really, really so happy that I did it and that I know all of the people that I got to work with, including May. And Sarah Gatton, we're like the Three Musketeers. Why do you think it was such a profound experience? Because it dealt with a lot of really deep shit, you know, that isn't often addressed and done in a way that kind of only may can do. I mean, I call them a unicorn. There's a singular kind of very fascinating person there. And the show is highly original, which is very unusual in 2025. Yeah, I'm curious to know how you say yes to projects.

Like, how do you discern which projects you're going to do? Because I am assuming you get lots and lots of offers and people want to work with you a lot. So how do you decide? Is it based on that material only, or do you factor in the other things, like where it's shooting, who's it for? Yeah, it's a combo, I have to say. But it has to start with a material. It has to start with kind of forgetting that you're reading a script, that you get drawn into the story and that matters to you beyond your own kind of career or what you might be able to imbue it with. You know, it's just about actually finding it fascinating and that there's some meaning that I vibe with. Really, it's kind of that simple. And then when everybody else starts

to become impressive or not, things can be clarified. But it's generally the script, generally, yeah. Right, right. I mean, you've played every, I mean, you're playing a cult leader, basically. Yeah, fun, it's so much fun. Which is fun. And I was trying to think of, like, is there a role that you haven't played yet that you are dying to play?

Because you've really run the gamut. You've had been in normal, healthy family-looking vibes and then very abnormal family my vibes. I don't have, um, let me get, get a snack for him. Get a biscuit. Get a biscuit. Well, while she's doing that, I wanted to ask your character and wayward, there, I mean, I'm curious where you channeled this performance from because your responses to people,

I'm thinking if I'm another person in that conversation, whether it's like a pause that's just too long or the way you respond, I'm like, I would be so uncomfortable. I'm wondering how you channeled that. At first I really didn't quite know how to place her. She's a woman of extremes, and the scripts were great in that it wasn't clear where to play certain things, like how big or how dark or how funny. There were many options, like many choices to be made, which is an absolute gift. So at first, I kind of was really embarrassing, and if anyone ever sees it, but I did a take,

which was like way too over the top, because I was just. trying to figure out where she sat in the scheme of things. And it felt a little bit like, I don't know, like a Marvel character, like an actual baddie, you know? Sure. And then we were working with a brilliant director, Aeros Lynn, who I actually worked with on this film called Dream Horse, this tiny little Welsh film, which is like the most moving, beautiful story. And so he was directing it and just very quickly kind of pulled me into the right area. It became more and more delicious, just being able to play with where she's

fucking with people and how she enjoys unnerving them and pushing them. But, I mean, essentially it's about trauma. And I'm a great believer of, you don't deal with this stuff. Then you're kind of flying blind. And it is kind of a life that's wasted. I mean, you know, we all have our own capabilities. But this woman was forcing young kids into areas which were, I mean, it's very much considered malpractice. It was just like there was no basis in anything good. It was just lots of really great ideas, but executed very, very incorrectly and somewhat dangerously. And I think the people involved were just lovely, you know. And those Canadians, man, they're good, decent people.

I know. They're so civilized. They're so civilized. My shoulders drop when I get to Canada. I'm like, oh, I feel like, I know. It's just so unwilling to help. Everyone wants to help everybody. When you do a scene like that, when you said, like, you know, your first take was over the top

or whatever. You were trying to place the character. Mortified. Find me now. Okay, sorry. Sorry I turned up. Let me go. Yeah, it feels like that. Who is the person that identifies that? Is it you? No, well, I ask. I'm like, have I fucked it? Am I, am I way to, have I, what am I doing? Where am I pitching it? Somebody tell me something because I am lost. I'm very, very collaborative, very open, very happy to take, you know, anything that will help from anybody. Right. Okay. So you also have a movie that I just watched. It's called Goodbye June. You watched it? Yes, of course.

Of course. I do my homework. And it's a phenomenal fucking cast of women. It's Kate Winslet, who is one of my all-time favorites as well. Who also directs it. Yeah, she directs it. I mean, this is her directorial debut, right? It is, yep, very much so.

Very exciting. She's in it. Andrea Rysborough, who's fucking awesome, is in it, and Helen Mirren is in it. Dame Helen Mirren. I said Andrea is a firecracker. She's got some of the best lines in the movie. Like, if you don't stop clicking that fucking pen, I'm going to punch that cock off your body. She's so angry.

Oh, but there's so much hurt underneath it, which is the great thing about the writing, all the characters. It's so funny because, you know, you grow up under the same roof and you have the same experiences. And then you just turn out so, so differently to each other. Siblings are just so diverse and have these similar experiences, but just like they're so different. So I play the kind of woo-woo, I guess I felt like potentially I was roped into being a third parent because I was the eldest child, everything felt too in mesh, so I just move away and I'm this journeying woman on a kind of, you know, an experience of searching out, seeking things and trying to become one with the cosmos constantly, wears crystals in her bra and has an

alternative lifestyle and is into that kind of thing, which I love because I just appreciate people who have the guts to just basically be themselves and live an authentic life. It makes my stomach feel relaxed because when you have a guessing game with people, it's too anxiety-inducing. So I absolutely love my character. So colourful. I hated taking her costume off at the end. I didn't want to let go.

And I just didn't want to let go of it because it was an amazing experience. So Andrea's character is really, really fucking angry at Kate Winslet's character. They were really tight. Kate, all she did, as Julia, was grow up and leave home. And Andrea felt abandoned and has been carrying around all kinds of resentment ever since. And then Johnny Flynn, the wonderful Johnny Flynn, who plays our younger brother, the baby in the family. Connor still lives at home, kind of can't get his shit together, you know, low self-esteem, not much confidence, a bit like, you know, just can't get going in life. And then Helen Mirren plays the matriarch of the family, our beautiful mother, who is nearing her death.

And we all come together to help her move into this next state of existence, the ultimate change, the big transition. Our dad is played by the wonderful Timothy Spall, and man, it was just the best. Kate is an incredible director. I don't, I didn't ever doubt it. First of all, let me say, I had always wanted to work with her. You do interviews and always get asked, who is the top of your bucket list? Who would you want to work with? And I always said Kate, because I just find that her choices are incredible.

You don't see her acting. It's completely honest. And she has such integrity. And she's so grounded and real. And I felt like I knew her. We had this mutual friend and now, honestly, I feel like she's my sister. Like we were always meant to be in this kind of familial kind of relationship with each other. I absolutely adore her.

And she created the most incredible atmosphere on set. It was just so freeing and full of trust and it felt so safe. I mean, they're navigating possibly, well, maybe one of the most challenging experiences that we actually all will face. And it's, you know, there are some really big, vulnerable scenes and it just felt like we could try anything and we all gave it our all. It was a very, very special experience that none of us wanted to let go on. We're still like on a family chat. Most of us are in New York here and we don't want to say goodbye as the movie goes off into

the world. But it's a beautiful story about family and yes, it's about loss and yes, you will definitely need your Kleenex, but you will laugh as well. It's so relatable and, you know, there are some zingers in there. It's an uplifting, kind of heartwarming, life-affirming story. It's very, very special. It's funny what you say about, you know, growing up and having a different experience. I know there's Gabor Matei or...

Yeah, I love him. He's incredible. He always talks about that. Because I always look at, because I'm one of six, I always look at... Six, my God. Where do you fall? Sorry, I'm the youngest. I'm the youngest.

Oh, of course you're the baby. Exactly. I'm the eldest. Very different experience. Of how many, Tony? Only three. Only three. But it runs in threes. Like if you've read, have you read birth order or the sibling effect or birth order? No, but I do subscribe to those ideas. Yeah. I will read them actually. It goes in threes. It's like, oldest, middle, youngest, and then repeat, repeat, repeat. With that. It's a sandwich. It's a sandwich. Right. Sandwich, sandwich. Because I'm always like, listen, there's nobody else in the world that knows what happened in our house besides my brothers and sisters. And we're all like, yeah, like we make a reference and we're like, yeah, we didn't get picked up on time either. Our car, our house was in. embarrassing. My dad had used cars strewn throughout the driveway. My mom never went to any public-facing school. Like, she wouldn't come to a play or a softball game or a conference.

She just couldn't handle the other parents. She was probably just overwhelmed and exhausted having had six children. I think she, I'm going to take a bath while you're all out. She needed some Lexa Pro, I think, and she forgot to get it. So I think that was the main ingredient. But it is interesting. Watching this movie, Goodbye June, it was very much. much about family dynamics and very relatable to anybody who has brothers or sisters, especially during that time. Because everyone has a different reaction to what's going on and some people can deal with the reality of the situation, whereas others are in complete denial of the situation. Yeah, everybody handles grief differently. There are no rules. And actually, I think it's

something they should teach in school. We don't know how to do it. And it's going to happen to all of us, you know. Chaos. Family is chaos at times. And it's gorgeously so. And there are just these very real moments that are fucking completely heartbreaking. At the premiere in London, I couldn't. I've seen the movie. I was there. I know what's happening. I was the last person to leave the cinema. I was like racked. My body was convulsing. I was crying so much. It just is very, very powerful for a very intimate, very quick shoot, very kind of, probably on the page seemed like a small story, but it's dealing with the biggest thing. death, life, life and death and love and family, like all of it, it's all of it.

I remember that his reaction in this movie reminded me when my mom passed away, my dad, we were all in the room, we were in a hospice, and my dad was sitting there and, you know, we knew her, she had passed and, like, we're all just kind of together. And my dad said, I got to go show a car to a client, like some random. And, like, we all looked up at him, and we just had no reaction. We were like, okay. And then he goes, and I need a suit for the funeral. And so can one of you do something?

And we're like, yeah. And then he left. And I was like, I wonder what happens to him when he gets in his car? And then my sister's like, he's not our problem right now. But it's so true that men's and women's reactions to things are so, it can be so surprising. But then once you see it, you understand we all process things differently. And there needs to be room for that. And maybe there needs to be bigger, more exceptional.

conversation around it because in the West we don't really, we're kind of shy away from it, almost as if it's taboo. Like, oh, no, that's, you know, pretending it's not going to happen. It's going to happen. Can't get out alive. Maybe this is a healing film. Maybe it'll start great conversations about being more. And actually, when I was younger, I was really angry at life. I was, I was like, this is a, this is a fucking mean joke. What is going on? What are we doing here? And it took a very long time for me to accept and appreciate the history of life. But I think once you have the context of life, you appreciate it more. I don't know. It helped me live more fully or something. I don't know. And what do you think gave you the context of

life? Life itself. I think you get given everything you need eventually. I like that. I know you did that show. Who do you think you are, right? Oh, yes. I did that show too. Did you? When did you do it? Oh, years ago. Probably 15 years ago. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. I did it in Australia, obviously. That's where I'm from. And I was like, oh, this is amazing. It's going to go back generations. It went to my grandparents. It was like two generations. Well, you are from Australia, so.

But it's colonized. I mean, we're Irish. And apparently, you know, there was a big journey to get there. But it was incredibly moving. It was just not what I expected, you know. Really? There's a lot of trauma in there. Yeah.

Were there any surprises? Well, my dad's dad is not who was told he was. Oh, wow. That's a surprise. My dad did a DNA test with his brother who was alive at the time and found out that his dad was not his dad, which he'd always kind of questioned. We still don't know for sure who my nan had a fling with, but I kind of felt really impressed with her. Me too. Yeah, she just clearly wasn't happy and found happiness elsewhere.

And my dad and I are alive because of that. I am her joy, you know? a good way to look at it. I'm sure it's way more complicated than that. But that's okay. It's nice. Every story is a love story at some point. I agree. Okay, we're going to take a break and then we're going to come back with callers. We have people calling in for advice. I'm so excited about this. I'm very excited about it. We'll be right back with Tony Collette. Cheers. I'm investigative journalist Melissa Jeltson. My new podcast, What Happened in Nashville, tells the story of an IVF clinic's catastrophic collapse and the patients who banned

together in the chaos that followed. We have some breaking news to tell you about. Tennessee's attorney general is suing a Nashville doctor. In April 2024, a fertility clinic in Nashville shut down overnight and trapped behind locked doors were more than a thousand frozen embryos. I was terrified. Out of all of our journey, that was the worst moment ever. At that point, it didn't occur to me what fight was going to come to follow.

But this story isn't just about a few families' future. It's about whether the promise of modern fertility care can be trusted at all. It doesn't matter how much I fight. Doesn't matter how much I cry over all of this. It doesn't matter how much justice we get. None of it's going to get me pregnant. Listen to what happened in Nashville on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Stefan Curry, and this is Gentleman's Cut.

I think what makes Gentleman's Cut different is me being a part of, you know, development. developing the profile of this beautiful finished product. With every sip, you get a little something different. Visit gentlemen's cut bourbon.com or your nearest total wines or Bevmo. This message is intended for audiences 21 and older. Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, Boone County, Kentucky. For more on Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, please visit gentleman's cuthuburn.com.

Please enjoy responsibly. Have you ever listened to those true crime shows and found yourself with more questions than answers? And what is this? how was that not a story we all know what it what's this you where is that why is it wet boy do we have a show for you from smartless media campside media and big money players comes crimeless join me josh dean investigative journalists and me roy scoville comedian as we celebrate the amazing creativity of the world's dumbest criminals we'll look into some of the silliest ways folks have broken the laws honestly it feels more like a high level

prank than a crime. Who catfish is a city? And meet some memorable anti-heroes. There are thousands of angry, horny monkeys. Clap if you think, she's a witch. And it freaks you out. He has x-rayed vision. How could I not follow him?

Honestly, I got to follow him. He can see right through me. Listen to Crimless on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Michael Lewis here. My book, The Big Short, tells the story of the building. up and burst of the U.S. housing market back in 2008. It follows a few unlikely, but lucky people

who saw the real estate market for the black hole it would become and eventually made billions of dollars from that perception. It was like feeding the monster, said Eisman. We fed the monster until it blew up. The monster was exploding. Yet on the streets of Manhattan, there was no sign anything important had just happened. Now, 15 years after the Big Short's original

release, and a decade after it became an Academy Award-winning movie, I've recorded an audiobook edition for the very first time. The Big Short Story, what it means when people start betting against the market, and who really pays for an unchecked financial system, is as relevant today as it's ever been, offering invaluable insight into the current economy and also today's politics. Get the Big Short now at Pushkin.fm. slash audiobooks, or wherever audiobooks are sold. Hi, I'm Danny Shapiro, host of the hit podcast Family Secrets. We were in the car, like a rolling stone came on, and he said, there's a line in there about your mother.

And I said, what? What I would do if I didn't feel like I was being accepted is shoes and identity that other people can't have. I knew something had happened to me in the middle of the night, but I couldn't hold on to what had happened. These are just a few of the moving and important stories. I'll be holding space for on my upcoming 13th season of Family Secrets. Whether you've been on this journey with me from season one or just joining the Family Secrets family, we're so happy to have you with us.

I'll dive deep into the incredible power of secrets, the ones that shape our identities, test our relationships, and ultimately reveal who we truly are. Listen to Family Secrets on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back with Tony Collette.

Okay, Catherine, what do we have going on today? Well, our first question comes from Rachel, and I thought you might have some insight into this, having gone through the preteen ages with a couple of your kids. So she says, Dear Chelsea, I'm an American living in Mexico, not those idiots who move here to avoid paying taxes or create travel Mexico TikToks. I moved here over 10 years ago

to work at an NGO that helps low-income families actually leave poverty. Incredible person right there. Anyway, about three months into living here, I met my husband, and now we have two kids, an 11-year-old girl and a five-year-old boy. The 11-year-old is his from a previous relationship, quite the telenovela, which is a whole other story,

but I have been in her life since she was three months old. His daughter and I have always been very close, but since my son was born five years ago, I feel like our relationship has drastically changed. She's becoming a tween slash preteen, and I know what comes with the territory, but this feels different. She hardly talks to me anymore,

even if I ask her questions. She will give me a very short answer or just shrug. She's so different with her father. She's a daddy's girl, so I don't take it personally. But when he asks the exact same questions, she tells him everything. I can't help but think she just doesn't want anything to do with me. I've tried asking her if she's mad at me

or thinking about something else, and she just brushes it off. I don't know what to do anymore. my husband hardly helps saying it's just a phase. Am I the wicked stepmother that she doesn't want in her life? Should I just blame it all on teenage hormones? What do you think I should do to keep the closeness we used to have? Asta Loego, Rachel.

Oh, I can completely understand that concern. Hi, Rachel. Especially if it's been close. Are you Rachel right there? Yeah, hi. Hello. Hi. So nice to meet you.

You too. Yeah. How long has this been going on? Sorry, was that in the letter. So when she was born, we had the very close. close connection. And then my son was born five years ago. He's five years old now. She's 11. And that connection kind of dwindled. Like, because I think my son was born, she kind of felt that my motherhood kind of went to him more than her. And so it's just kind of been rocky.

I don't think this is an uncommon story. I'm just going to say that right there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think when another sibling comes along, it's inevitable that you need to give that new person so much more attention. And yeah, the existing child can feel somewhat abandoned, right? So you're everything to them and they get all your attention and then there's a split focus. I kind of tend to agree with your partner. Life keeps changing and I think potentially it really is a phase and you can help her feel safe in the connection again and maybe have some one on one time together and it will continue to change. There are so many phases. I have a question. Is she, is her mother in the picture? Yeah, I was going to ask that too.

Yeah. So her mom lives like five minutes from us. We have a really good relationship. And so that's kind of it too. Like I don't want to kind of force her to call me mom or do those things. You know, I don't want that to be an issue. But I also like, there is one thing I was telling Catherine in the pre-interview, like we had a Mother's Day event at her school. And all of the kids like wrote their mom's name on a heart and they like threw it up when they were singing. And she said, she wrote her mom's name, obviously, because it's her mom. But I was hoping, like, maybe she would turn the car and it would have my name on it, and it didn't.

And it was like, kind of, it hurt. But I'm not going to tell her that because those are my emotions. No, no, no, no. Don't put that stuff on her. She's 11 years old. So her emotions are just, like, not, they're not that sophisticated. She's, like, coming from, like, you know, and make to love fear based. And, like, so she doesn't have abandonment issues, which is why I asked if her mom was

in the picture. So one more question. Is she, what's her relationship like with your father? year old. They're great. Like, they get along super well. She's very caring for him, kind of like that older sibling who always wants to make sure he's okay. So they have a great relationship. It's really interesting. She has a great relationship with her biological mother and the younger kid. Sometimes they feel they can express all the shitty, crappy feelings and project it onto the person they actually feel the safest with. Yeah. That is true. Is she disrespectful to you or

just distant? No, just distant. And it's like sometimes I've talked to her mom about it. And her mom's like, she does it to me too. Sometimes she's just like, see, see. And I think because we have her part time when she's with us, she wants to spend as much time as she can with her dad, which makes sense. But I think I need to kind of squeeze in there and be like, okay, can I have a day or two

so that her and I can come back and connect and do stuff together. I would say also like back off a little bit and let her come to you a little bit more. But definitely exploit the relationship. relationship between your son and her, make sure that that's a primary focus so that she's constantly feels needed, you know what I mean, and feels purposeful in your mind. Like, she's probably starting to get to an age where she's like, oh, you know, I can understand her feeling competitive with a five, but she's not taking it out on him. And to take it out on you is a little strange. So you should be available to her, like always make sure. But

sometimes when people push you away, it's like give them double space, not to be childlike or act immature but as a grown up like oh she needs a little space right now let her have her space because it's an age thing she's going to come back around when she needs something from you or she needs advice that maybe she can't go to her mother for or something you know something's going to happen where she is going to need you but i know definitely when when kids that age are going through that emotion that like changing and they're coming into their hormones and puberty and all of that shit you can't discount how effective that is it's big yes things really do change for them. This, like, the whole world is like a constant, like a moving, you know, so. Yeah. So your job is to really

just not take it personally. Like, you're an adult and you're the adult in the situation. So you need to take it not personally. Like, oh, she's not into me for this period of time in her life. It is a phase. It's always a phase. Everything in life is a phase. There's nothing permanent. But yeah, just give her extra space and be mindful of the kids' relationship. It's important that she, you know, she's the big sister. She's the one that can make decisions when you're not around, you know, kind of putting some responsibility into her hands so she feels really purposeful within the family unit. Okay, no, that's great advice. No, thank you so much. Yeah, great. Thanks for taking my question, you guys. It was great to meet you. Lovely to make you. Love it. Love you see soon. Take care. Bye. Bye. Bye. That was cute. I know.

She's such a cutie. That was sweet. Yeah. It's so nice, you know, mothers trying to be better mothers and stepmothers trying to be better mothers. I'm out here just trying not to get any more children in my life. So to hear people. I know. There's no reason the more you say no, the more they want you. It's very interesting, isn't it? Yeah, she, I mean, the fact that she's so mindful and caring and wants to make it great is beautiful.

That's not wicked stepmother energy. No, negative. Yeah. So our next caller is Noah, and he says, dear Chelsea. My name is Noah. and I'm 19 years old. I'm not going to say I'm gay because you already know that since I listen to this podcast. You are a badass. I live in a mid-sized town in Maryland. I'm currently a college student studying for a Bachelor of Fine Arts and Acting. I have dreams of becoming an actor and I've

always seen myself living in Los Angeles. The problem is I have an incredibly close-knit family with three younger siblings and two parents who am very close to. I'm a homebody and I've never really liked to leave home or even sleep away or really do anything on my own. So my question for you is, how do I prepare to make such a big move to another coast to fulfill my dreams? I still have a couple more years of college, so this isn't an issue that's urgent, but how do I become independent, self-reliant, and okay to live so far away from people I love so much? Love Noah. Oh, how bloody wonderful that you love your family so much,

and there's that connection and support, and that you feel completely cozy with them. A lot of people want to get out. Thank you. Thank you very much. I left home at 19 because I just couldn't wait to get the fuck out of there. So my situation is different. I was the youngest. You're the oldest. There's a sense of responsibility that you feel that I did not feel.

But my drive to become, like wanting to start my adult life and become whatever it was I was going to become was paramount to that. So it's like you kind of have to, you know, A, you're not leaving your family. You're not. You're never going to leave your family. They're here for good. They're locked in. So it's just about setting up a life where you're not. you are going to be back and visiting them and coming back.

If you really are passionate about going after this dream of yours, it sounds like you are. I mean, you're getting an education for it. Then you have to kind of know that like there is, you know, you're going to come back for the holidays. They're going to come visit you in California. That's going to be exciting for the family. And you can stay in touch in a million zillion ways right now, you know, on face times and social media. Oh, it's much easier now. So, so much easier.

So it's like, look at it not as a dread. but as like an adventure, you know, like flip the script and be like, this is the beginning of this part of my life. And these are the sacrifices I have to make. You move to L.A. You're going to meet people. You're going to have exciting things happen there immediately because it's so new to you. And you just kind of have to get to a place where you're ready to make that transition. You don't have to do it tomorrow. But, you know, if you want to chase your dreams, you kind of have to start chasing them. Yes. And there is something that happens when you go to, you know, somewhere where you're in a creative career, especially on one of the coasts, where you will find your chosen family.

It takes a little doing. It takes like getting out there and meeting new people and taking classes and, you know, getting involved in things. But you will find a family that feels very close to you. We all find our tribe. Absolutely. You left home early because you went to school early, right? You didn't even finish school, Tony. I started acting in high school. Yeah, I did, I did a music. I kind of started at singing. I did a musical and then, The teachers encouraged me to go to, like, a youth theatre group. So slowly my world started to open. But, I mean, I wasn't prepared.

When I did Muriel's wedding, which was only my second film, and I don't come from, like, they are creative in their own way, but everyone's got, like, you know, what would be considered regular jobs. You know, I'm kind of like, my dad's like, this is a miracle. Then everyone's still pinching themselves that ever happened. And there is some kind of, I also felt a bit guilty for having these incredible experiences and I was constantly on the phone to my family, you know, trying to share the experiences I was having. I think ultimately what you come to realize at some point is that you are allowed

to have your own life and your own experiences. And if you are passionate about acting and actually have that talent and that fire in you, it won't go away. You just have to follow it. You have to honor it because that's the breadcrumb on your path. It's going to lead to all kinds of growth and everything opening. And it is very much an adventure. And it's, inevitable that you're going to meet new people because you have to put yourself into, I love travelling. I think it's the best way to learn. You are put in situations that are completely unfamiliar. It makes you grow. It makes you open up. And if you're doing classes, you'll meet like-minded people and creative people. They are just more, they are open, right? They just

connect in ways that somebody in an office may not. I'm not generalising, trying not to generalise, but there's just an openness to that field. So I think, you know, allow yourself to follow the passion. I think really that's all all of us can do in life. That will lead you to the right place. That will bring you to the good. Yeah. When you know what you want to do, that is a biggest gift. I mean, I don't know how many people you've talked to that don't know what they want to do, but we have a lot of people call into the podcast that have no idea what their passion is and they're looking to find it. So that's already, you're already ahead of the game by knowing. Thank you. Thank you. You're so right. Okay, great. Have you got plans? Where are you sitting right now

with venturing out into the world away from Maryland? Good. I mean, I've always dreamed of going kind of far away and being on my own, but I've always been someone who just is so, I'm so close to my mom. And it won't change. It won't change. You'll get closer. Actually, distance makes the heart grow fonder. And that's true. Like, you know, I used to hate my parents. And then I went away and moved to California. And then the next Christmas, I'm like, I think I love you guys again. I'll come back. I just needed a break. You know what I mean? So imagine if you already have a strong relationship, it's only going to get stronger and enhance more.

Exactly. Exactly. I think the other thing that is a little hard for me is that my youngest sister is she's five. And I just, she just started in kindergarten. And it's a little hard for her just like it was hard for me to leave. And so I'm like such a part of her experience and wanting to. And I know obviously like you said, Chelsea, FaceTime is so amazing, but I still just feel a little like I want to be here for everything. For the day-to-dayness, I totally get it. You're such a sweetheart. You're so sweet. I appreciate that.

Darling, boy. You're going to have the time of your bloody life and you're going to be a great role model for her to get out and do the same. Exactly. You're going to be the older brother. She can come visit, like maybe even before too long. I know my nieces and nephews started visiting even by themselves when they were like seven or eight, you know. You're right. And if you live near Disneyland, all the better.

Exactly. It's all right. Exactly. Good luck. Good luck with this career, this burning passion. Don't let that flame dwindle. Go for it. Thank you so much.

Keep us posted, okay? Total pleasure. I will. I will. Chelsea, you're the best. Thank you so much. Bye. Chelsea, you are the best.

Thank you. Thank you so much. Good luck. He had such a distinctive voice. I was like, you better make out here, right? Yeah. Yeah. Good voice for podcasting.

I sounded like that last week. I was doing all these radio each music. London. I was sick. I sounded actually like a drag queen. I love that sound. I do too. I'm kind of sad that it's come back. I love it. I love that voice. I wanted to have it all the time. Sometimes you get too, like I get too high or chirpy and sometimes I hear myself. I'm like, why are you screaming? You know? Because you're excited. It's okay. I know. I get too excited, I think. It's good to be excitable. Okay, we'll take a break and we'll come back with one more and then we'll wrap up with Tony. Okay, we'll take a break. We'll be right back.

I'm investigative journalist Melissa Jeltson. My new podcast, What Happened in Nashville, tells the story of an IVF clinic's catastrophic collapse and the patients who banded together in the chaos that followed. We have some breaking news to tell you about. Tennessee's attorney general is suing a Nashville doctor. In April 2024, a fertility clinic in Nashville shut down overnight and trapped behind locked doors were more than a thousand frozen emberts. I was terrified. Out of all of our journey, that was the worst moment ever.

At that point, it didn't occur to me what fight was going to come to follow. But this story isn't just about a few families' futures. It's about whether the promise of modern fertility care can be trusted at all. It doesn't matter how much I fight. Doesn't matter how much I cry over all of this. It doesn't matter how much justice we get. None of it's going to get me pregnant. Listen to what happened in Nashville. on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Stefan Curry, and this is Gentleman's Cut.

I think what makes Gentleman's Cut different is me being a part of developing the profile of this beautiful finished product. With every sip, you get a little something different. Visit Gentleman'scuturban.com or your nearest Total Wines or Bevmo. This message is intended for audiences 21 and older. Gentleman's Cut Bourbon, Boone County, Kentucky.

For more on gentlemen's cut bourbon, please visit gentlemen's cuthuburn.com. Please enjoy responsibly. Have you ever listened to those true crime shows and found yourself with more questions than answers? And what is this? How is that not a story we all know? What's this? Where is that? Why is it wet?

Boy, do we have a show for you? From Smartless Media, Campside Media, and Big Money Players comes Crimeless. Join me, Josh Dean, investigative journalists. And me, Roy Scoville, comedian, as we celebrate the amazing creativity of the world's dumbest criminals. We'll look into some of the silliest ways folks have broken the laws. Honestly, it feels more like a high-level prank than a crime. Who catfishes a city? And meets some memorable anti-heroes.

There are thousands of angry, horny monkeys. Clap, if you think, she's a witch. And it freaks you out. He has X-ray vision. How could I not follow him? Honestly, I got to follow him. He can see right through me. Listen to Crimless on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Decoding Women's Health.

I'm Dr. Elizabeth Pointer, chair of Women's Health and Gynecology at the Adria Health Institute in New York City. On this show, I'll be talking to top researchers and top clinicians, asking them your burning questions and bringing that information about women's health and midlife directly to you. 100% of women go through menopause. It can be such a struggle for our quality of life, but even if it's natural, why should we suffer through it? The types of symptoms that people talk about is forgetting everything, I never used to forget things. They're concerned that, one, they have dementia,

and the other one is, do I have ADHD? There is unprecedented promise with regard to cannabis and cannabinoids, to sleep better, to have less pain, to have better mood, and also to have better day-to-day life. Listen to Decoding Women's Health with Dr. Elizabeth Pointer on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you're listening now. Sometimes it's hard to remember, but... Going through something like that is a traumatic experience,

but it's also not the end of their life. That was my dad, reminding me and so many others who need to hear it, that our trauma is not our shame to carry, and that we have big, bold, and beautiful lives to live, after what happened to us. I'm your host and co-president of this organization, Dr. Lyotra Tate. On my new podcast, The Unwanted Sorority, we wade through transformation to peel back healing

and reveal what it actually looks like, and sounds like, in real time. Each week, I sit down with people who live through harm, carried silence, and are now reshaping the systems that failed us. We're going to talk about the adultification of black girls, mothering as resistance, and the tools we use for healing. The unwanted sorority is a safe space, not a quiet space.

So let's walk in. We're moving towards liberation together. Listen to the unwanted sorority, new episodes every Thursday on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back with Tony Collette. Yay. Let's do one more, Catherine. Yeah. All right.

Well, this comes from Izzy. And this is just an email. So Izzy says, Dear Chelsea. first of all, thanks to you and Catherine for all your great advice. You're like the cool older cousin I get advice from way more than my actual family. And let's just say I made a big life decision recently, which was easier just imagining the advice you would give. Here's my issue. I'm 43. I'm the oldest of four siblings. My youngest sister is in her mid-30s. My siblings are all very close and we accept each other for who we are. That being said, there's a specific issue that has really started getting on my nerves. My youngest sister almost never says thank you. From little things like buying her dinner to not texting me to say thank you when a gift for her kid arrives. She lives kind of far away from me. Usually it's easy to let it go, but recently I made what I felt was a generous purchase for her, just because I make more than her. But I didn't get so much as a thank you.

I know it's not her problem, how I feel. But I felt like it was just expected when what I felt what I did was above and beyond. She's always been the classic baby of the family. I know there's gratitude in her heart, and maybe her ADHD makes it harder to remember to say something, but I want to know from you, as somebody who's generous with their family, how would you handle this? Am I being too nitpicky to sit down and use an eye statement and request just a simple thank you? Would love to hear your take, Izzy. No, I think that's general. Like, it's funny that, you know, here we go again with the same families, you know, same parents.

You grow up in the same family and you have different habits. But I think please and thank you are major criterion. that are necessary for people, and that's your sister. So it shouldn't be an issue to go, hey, I've definitely said stuff to my family about saying please and thank you. And it's not that you're doing it to get the thank you. It's kind of just like good practice to thank people for generous things or gifts, even small things. It's nice to say thank you. It's good manners. I totally agree. Yeah. And it sounds like that you all really have great relationships and this has just kind of slowly been mounting within you.

There's a fine line, right? Because if you are a generous person, I think you kind of have to give without expecting, without expecting anything back, to be honest. Giving is about giving. But I can understand that you might want to have some, like you also don't want to be taken advantage of. So there might be a little boundary there that needs to be set or clarified. Yeah, I think so. Friendly reminder. It's like, yeah, this is something I would put in writing rather. than say to someone. But putting in writing alone just makes it feel heftier. But sometimes it gives people more room to actually digest the information because it's written down in a sweet little email. Like if you wrote her, sent her an email and said, hey, you know, you're my sister. I love you. I'm always going to be doing the nice little things for you. But I've noticed a couple times where I've gone out of my way for you. And I haven't even gotten a thank you. And that kind of feels like either maybe you don't want things from me. And if that's, it could be that. I was

thinking in that as well. Some people are uncomfortable with receiving no matter who it's from, right? And so they don't know how to respond because it's overwhelming to be spoiled in a way. I don't know what was given. Did we talk about what was she given? She didn't say. I think she's trying to keep it anonymous. vague. Yeah, of course. But if you bring that up in the thing, if you say that in your email, like, listen, maybe you don't. Do you want me to stop? Yeah, maybe you don't want these things for me. It puts it off of you and the thank you more and it gives her the opportunity because maybe she doesn't want gifts from you, but it gives her the opportunity to go, oh, God, A, if she does, she's going to be like, no, I'm so sorry. I do, I don't even realize I'm not saying, thank you. She probably

doesn't even realize it. I'm sure she does it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I would definitely would be mortified. I definitely would say something. It's your sister. You can say anything to your sister, you know, even if they get mad or it's going to be okay in a couple days, you know, based on the close-knit relationship you have. But definitely, I mean, these are manners people need to have. Please and thank you are kind of the two most important, you know, phrases in the English language. To add to what you were saying, if you make it more about making her feel comfortable and it's less about how disgruntled you feel and just like, I just, I don't want to overstep the mark. Is it okay that I did that? You know, I just didn't hear back.

Like, it's kind of done in a way, a very generous way, in making sure that they're okay with it. Yeah, yeah. Rather than feeling a bit jilted. I know, I don't feel comfortable getting gifts. I'm always just like, oh, God. You know, like, I don't know why. Don't try and compliment me. It's like, you know.

Right. Exactly. Right. Right, right, right, right. But yes, definitely say something and put it on the gift giving and we, we sorted that problem out. Okay. Well, you can see Tony's latest works on Netflix. Everything she's doing is on Netflix right now.

So I'm sure there's going to be more to come. But Wayward is the series that you should watch with May Martin, who created, created, produced, stars in, wrote, produced, started. Everything but directed. Yeah. And also make sure you check out Goodbye June,

which is a beautiful film also on Netflix. Tony, thank you so much for your time today. Absolutely pleasure. I loved hanging out with you. I can't wait to do it in person. I really can't. I don't know. I thought that's what today was going to be,

but I'm really happy to see you. And I hope you have a beautiful holiday season up there in Whistler. And I just love what you do. You make people feel great. how brilliant that people feel so comfortable and write into you about like these kind of personal dilemmas that they have that really says something about you actually oh thank you i love doing it i love doing i love giving unsolicited advice so i may as well be solicited i kind of love it as well

i think i see other people more clearly than i see myself well actually i've grown into seeing myself more clearly and so you but we all do we all see everybody else like it's objective's a mirror right yeah and who better to give advice than someone that has nothing to do with your problems Totally objective. Yep. Yeah. This is a total pleasure. I'm so happy to see you and so lovely to meet you.

And thanks for having me and enjoy life. See you in 2026. Okay. You too. Happy holidays, Tony. Yeah, likewise. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

I just announced all my tour dates. It's called the High and Mighty Tour. I will be touring from February through June. So go get your tickets now. If you want good seats and you want to come see me perform, I will be on. the high and mighty tour. Do you want advice from Chelsea? Write into Dear Chelsea Podcast at gmail.com.

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