Dear Chelsea - I’m a Martha with Paul W. Downs

Episode Date: May 30, 2024

Hacks Co-creator Paul W. Downs joins Chelsea today to talk about discovering moments of kismet, what it’s like working in a creative throuple, and whether he’s a Martha Stewart or a Snooki.  Then: A nervous flyer seeks help after escaping Hurricane Katrina. A fiance wonders if her wealthy soon-to-be-husband is holding out on her.  And a child behavioral therapist struggles when her partner cuts her off from making decisions for their child.   * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brad Dickert * * * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together, our mission on the Really Know Really podcast is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why the bathroom door doesn't go all the way to the floor, what's in the museum of failure, and does your dog truly love you? We have the answer. Go to reallyknowreally.com

and register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. The Really Know Really podcast. Follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, Katherine. Hi, Chelsea. I'm in New York City and I'm sweaty. I'm a sweaty Betty. I went to the wrong studio this morning.

Not your fault. I've been all over town, up and down town. It's only 2 o'clock in the afternoon and I've already changed my underwear twice. Great. Getting a little humid down there. It's a little moist over here in New York. Yeah. So I'm only here for three more days.

I'm on my transition to Mallorca. First I come to New York, then I go farther east and then I go farther east. That's what we did when we went to Mallorca with you. We stopped in New York and saw some Broadway shows with a friend and then we, you know, peaced out to Spain for a week, which was wonderful. I know. I'm not seeing any Broadway shows this week, but I've been invited to a couple. But I'm just trying to pop into my favorite restaurants since I'll be out of town and seeing all my friends that I haven't seen. I like to make my presence known when I am in town because I'm gone so much. I'll be out of

town for eight weeks now. And Doug is going to sleepaway camp for a month where he's going to learn how to come when I call him. And not be on everything, hopefully. Yeah, he's, yeah, my baby, my baby. I love my baby. Well, I know you'll miss him, but we are very excited to see you move off to Mallorca and have some fun for a while.

Yeah, you can tune into my Instagram to watch me with my nieces and nephews while I'm corrupting them. Perfection. I'm reading a book right now called Hamnet. I've heard that's good. It's on my little to-read list. Yeah, I'm halfway through. It's nice.

I like things that are set, like, centuries ago, so I don't really have to, you know? I'm reading something right now that's set a couple centuries ago and like it's a little bit of like an unlikable main character I like that kind of a witch and a bitch I know it's not often you have an unlikable main character but I sometimes prefer that yeah it's called Fine Shade

with a Y Chelsea we have a very fun guest today who oh my god I'm excited he's so ridiculous he's so funny and tonight is the season finale of his show season finale of hacks everybody he created hacks which is a great show with gene smart and hannah einbinder on max and our friend and guest today is the person responsible for it well he and his wife are responsible for it. And Bestie. And Bestie.

Yeah. Oh, that's right. Him and his wife and their best friend. They're a throuple. Please welcome Paul W. Downs. Oh, my God. You're so ridiculous. Paul W., have you ever been on a Zoom before?

I have. Aren't you a showrunner? I am. But we don't usually have echo issues. Just to fill our listeners in, Paul W. went from his closet or some sort of bunker. I was in a bunker. It was all wood, so there was an echo. Then we told him maybe if he could get into bed or something. He didn't want to do that. We offered you to get in a bed and instead you went around the corner into some, is this a birthing room that you're in now?

This is a bedroom. This is a bedroom. There is a bed. But here's the thing. It's a laptop. So I'd have to like hold the laptop. I'm like. Oh no, no, no, no.

We just want you to be as comfortable as possible because you're stressing me out. Oh no. Don't get stressed. Paul, congratulations on season three of the very funny, very successful hacks on HBO Max. Well, we call it Max now, right? Yeah, I suppose so. We do. Legally, we must. Yeah. Yes, we must. How has this experience been? Because, okay, to fill our listeners in, Paul writes with his wife, Lucia. Yep, Lucia. And you guys came up with this, right? We did. We came up with it with our very best friend, Jen Statsky, who's our third showrunner. Okay, right.

I have a very good friend from high school named Jen Statsky. No way. Yeah. And did you go to high school in New Jersey? I did, Livingston High School. So tell Jen. I'm from New Jersey. My parents are from Randolph and Dover.

Yeah. First of all, I should say, I should have started with huge fan. But also, I've always thought you could be in my family. You just, I just, I just get the vibe. You'd fit right in. Yeah. I'm very, I'm a very Jersey girl at heart. That's really where the edges come. Yeah. So are you right. I'm a Jersey girl too. Yeah. Would you compare yourself to Snooki at all? No, I'm not a Snooki. I'm more of Martha Stewart. I Stewart I gotta say right you know pick a Jersey girl that I I feel is my yeah I do too because she's got the right amount of bitch well she's got an extra

amount of bitch which I respect I do too I yeah I got heavy on the bitch and um light on the the duck face she's light on the pleasantries yeah she doesn't care she doesn't have time every time I see her she's like who are you with chelsea what who brought who's your plus one that's all she cares about and i'm like yeah i like i like that she cuts to the chase like i don't want to say how it's so hot today either to anyone you know i don't know it's embarrassing okay so tell us because i know that you said you said you were quoted as saying that women are funnier than men well yeah i'll stand by that i do say that's a good thing for men to start saying you know know, just start practicing that. I agree. And is that why you wanted to do a show centered around a female comedian? Yes. We were talking about how I mean,

my first the first live stand up show, like real stand up show I ever saw was Paula Poundstone in Morristown, New Jersey. And there were just like so many stand ups that we were talking about that never got the same do that a ton of their male counterparts did. And we were just like so many standups that we were talking about that never got the same do that a ton of their male counterparts did. And we were just like, it's interesting, especially, you know, because I met my wife and Jen in New York at the UCB. And we were like, you know, part of that alt comedy scene, which also are you I'm sorry, are you guys a throuple? We're not a throuple. Sexually? We do not. The three of us don't have sex. Okay. Just checking. I'm just clarifying, but that's good to know that. So does she have a partner slash lover?

She does. She has a husband actually. Okay. Cause that's very relevant to this conversation. She does have a husband. He would probably be fine if we, you know, became sexual, but we're not. Okay. Well, don't count your chickens before they hatch. You never know what's down the pike. That's exactly right. I don't think I used that expression the right way, but I liked the way I used it. I did too. I did too.

So not a throuple. But yeah, we, we just were like in this alt comedy scene also where there was a little bit of like, what's cool comedy. What's not cool comedy, you know?

And we were interested in exploring what it was like for like a younger comedian who maybe thought someone like deborah vance was a hack not a cool comedy person what it would be like for her to understand like all of the all of the indignities that person suffered to like pave the way for other young comedians like her so when we thought of it we we wrote an email to each other that was just like the logline of the show and we could not stop thinking about it. Anytime we hung out, we talked about it.

I mean, it is such a great idea for a show to look at something that way. I would have thought in the opposite direction, like to prove this tough, tough bad guy was like really did have a heart, but that's also part of the story too with Jean Smart's character, right? Yeah, she's like a very call smart's character right yeah she's like a

very callous person yeah it's like a like a love affair between hannah and gene smart it is a love affair and we actually talk about it that way we we talk about the thaw all the time uh-huh yeah yeah so you didn't you never did stand up when you were at ucb i did do stand up i did i did mostly sketch and improv but i did do stand up and actually did. I did mostly sketch and improv, but I did do stand up. And actually, it was because I did stand up and I found it a lonely and be like what I was doing was like a lot of like care. I would often be like, hey, I have some tech and people at clubs would be like, what? And now I feel like there's a lot of tech in stand up. Like you go to a show and it's like PowerPoints and tons of stuff. But I don't know. I just it didn't feel like the right place. I don't know what you're fucking talking about. I have never seen a PowerPoint presentation at

a standup show. I mean, I understand the differentiation between alternative and standup because Hannah's alternative, I would describe Hannah's comedy as alternative, which I just did in an article at the wall street journal or something like that for her. Oh, cool. Oh, cool. Because she is alternative. Like she has tech. Yes, she does have tech. That's right. She does. That's a great yes. She's a perfect example of it. Paul W., do you think Hannah's character is written after you is like loosely based on you? No, she's the closest to Jen. And the reason I mean, there is parts of myself and Lucia and Jen in the character and also parts of us and Deborah as well. Again,

I'm a Martha Stewart. and i feel like the biggest similarity is that jen early when when twitter was like just popping off she became very successful on twitter i don't know can he be successful she a lot of people followed her and she got hired essentially i mean she had a great packet i'm sure but she was hired to write for jimmy fallon and i think part of her discovery was because she was so well liked her comedy, her jokes were so good on Twitter. So that part of like the origin story of the character is borrowed from Jen's life. But there's a little bit of all of us in it. Yeah. I mean, it's nice to have a team of three when you're doing anything creative, because that gives you two heads to bounce ideas off of. So you can really like check the box of,

you know, because sometimes when you're working with yourself, you always have to bounce it off of someone else before you can put it live or write it down, because I do. Actually, that's not true. I don't. But I do sometimes. I do. If I'm like on the fence about something, I, you know, bounce it off a couple of people to get the reaction. All I usually need is one confirmation. I'm like, I was right. That's funny. You know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You say it out loud to see if there's a reaction. And if there's not, you walk away with your head between your legs. Right. Or like me, because I've continued to do standup to a certain degree, not enough to be maybe considered one, but I will keep doing a bit that doesn't work if I feel like it works for

truly years. I just keep doing it. I'm like, I think- That's funny. If I do something twice and two times, it doesn't work. I don't do it again. That's probably the way to do it. No, I don't think there are any rules to anything. There really aren't the goal. I think for every creative and you tell me if you disagree in any way is to be confident in their, what they're creating to have confidence in your creative ability. And when you're confident in what you're creating, like that, you can smell that. And when you're confident in what you're creating, like that,

you can smell that. And when you're not, you can smell it. So if you're on stage doing something that doesn't work and you're confident about it, it will still work. Right. Yeah.

I think that's true. I don't lose an audience because I think it's funny. It does tickle me. And I do think that's something that. Please don't use that expression on this podcast that it tickles you. No, no, not today.

It's like, okay. That's a personal request. Oh, good to know. You don't like tole? No. No, not today. It's like, okay. That's a personal request. Oh, good to know. You don't like to be tickled. No, I don't. I don't like that. I don't like the word tickle. I find it very molesty. Oh, 100%. Like, come and get a tickle. It's like, no, thank you. I'm not coming to get a tickle. Or tickle your fancy is another expression that I could do without, but I use it all the time in spite of it because it's so stupid. This might tickle your fancy, but it's very evocative. But no, I think you're right. You have to be confident and you have to enjoy it yourself.

That's one of the things that having three of us, it is good because we're so confident because if we can make one of the other three laugh, my favorite audience are the two of them. And so we're constantly trying to make each other laugh. But it's also great because we have a tiebreaker. So that's also there's a really good part of the three in creative collaboration because of that, too. So you guys won a bunch of Emmys. You went on your honeymoon.

Is this correct? And then you flew back straight to the Emmys. Yeah, well, we we weirdly because because of when the Emmys were happening, we did our honeymoon before our wedding. So we got married. I mean, the true story is this. I don't know if I could get it up to do that. Like do it in reverse. Or maybe I would do the honeymoon and then leave before the marriage. It was great to do in reverse because I'm like, no. Well, we actually found out like 11 days before our honeymoon that Lucia was two months pregnant, which we did not plan.

And the baby was yours? And the baby was mine, as far as I know. Okay, well, obviously that's something to look into. So we went on our honeymoon, we got married, and then we came back and like four days later were the Emmys. So it was a really crazy month. And then you won Emmys.

How many Emmys did you win that night? We did. I only won one. Lucia won two that night. Jean won one. I mean, there were a few Emmys for the show, but I personally took home one. Let's talk about Jean Smart. Tell me about your experience with, because Jean Smart lost her husband at the beginning of this series. I remember Hannah was telling me that. And then she had this huge resurgence at the same time, which I find those things kind of coincide in people's lives all the time, right? There can be a big loss and then there can be like a major

shift in a different area. So tell us about choosing Jean Smart for the role. Like how did you decide? Well, we wrote the part without anybody in mind and we had written the script and we made a list of people that we thought would be good for it. And she was honestly at the top of the list because we wanted someone who could do like their heartfelt moments in the show, more dramatic parts. But also we needed her to be a believable stand up and deliver a joke. And there's not a ton of women that are that age that we thought would be perfect for it. And so we sent it to her and she met with us and said, you know, I always wanted to be a standup. When I was 12, I, everyone was mermaid or a princess and I dressed as Phyllis Diller and none of the other kids got it. But she's like, I've always wanted to do that. So it's weirdly

kismet. And then a lot of weird kismet stuff kept happening. Like what else? Tell us. I like weird kismet shit. You know, when Jean's husband passed, we sent her flowers and they were her wedding flowers. And she's like, it's so weird. How would you have known that anemones were my wedding flower? And we just like a weird coincidence. But there kept being these things that she's like, when we would write the script, she'd be like, do you know I was obsessed with Christmas? And we'd be like, no, we don't really know you that well.

We're just starting the season. But there was a lot of things that were written into the show that she was like, this is as if you live in my house. Or there was just a bunch of stuff that felt weird, you know, felt weirdly like it was, it was a destined thing. She was meant for it, but yeah. Your character is so fucking funny. You and Megan. Oh my God. Megan is so ridiculous. I mean, does she ever say anything serious? I'm like, every time I see her, I'm like, are you in character or are you, I'm like, is this your real person? She's always on. She's always on. But I have gotten some serious moments from her. And actually, you'll see it in the season, she plays some serious moments in the show.

Ooh, I don't know if I'm ready for that. I got to tell you what, she was making me cry in the scene. In season three, it's the finale of season three. She was so good. I was moved during it. It was crazy. She's great. Yeah. Okay. That's enough about that. Now, how do you know when you are writing something and you're starring in it? I always am curious about directing and starring in your own stuff. How do you know when it's actually serving the purpose, like serving the script versus just serving your own role and expansion of it? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah I think because being a writer on the show like writing the show I think I care so much more about the story than my part in the show that

oftentimes I'm like we can lose we can lose that scene of Jimmy I honestly often I'm like the one who's like just cut that and luckily I have these other people who are like no keep it in that was a funny scene we got to keep it in but when But when I'm directing, I mostly direct episodes that Jimmy isn't really in. Because I find that hard, too. I'm like, I don't know how you do a whole movie where you're the lead of the movie and directing the movie. I'm like, what do you watch? Playback every five minutes.

And it seems or you're in a scene. You're like, can we just what I need you to do? You know, you're directing your partner. But you're writing, directing and starring in this. That's a lot. I didn't realize you were also directing yeah I direct only a handful of the episodes Lucia all right we get it we get it you're a director you don't have to get defensive and a showrunner I'm saying I don't direct that many I don't I don't even I dabble I dabble I dabble but we have fun and how does that work

let me tell I want to know about being with your spouse, working together, living together. How does that vibe work? You have a kid now. We do. And obviously you have to have help because if you're both working. We do. We do. Whenever I think of a couple working together, I envision Dr. Phil with his wife in the audience

and think, don't you have anything to do? Why is she sitting there listening to her fucking husband? Like, that's an hour she could get away from him and she's choosing to go and listen to him rant and rave. But I think, I guess, I'm going to answer my own question here, but then I want you to elaborate, Paul W., because working together with a spouse

in a creative space must be very stimulating, right? Like, more stimulating. Like, being able to carry your work home with you when it is creative isn't as onerous like being able to carry your work home with you when it is creative, isn't as onerous as it is to carry your work home with you if you're a CPA or something. Exactly. We, we are in a way we're always working, but we're never working because even when we're together and we're at a restaurant and we see a waitress who's like doing something fun, we're like, this is, this is a scene. You know what I mean? We're constantly collecting material, but also we're never really bored because we always have

something. And the thing is, is because we also work on comedy together, it's about trying to make the other person laugh. So again, it's not like being a CPA or even doing something dramatic. I'm like, yeah, we're not bringing home some true crime murder story, you know, and thinking about the directing of that. We're, we're thinking about a better joke. Or directing the Ashley Madison documentary. Is that what you were thinking of saying? Exactly. Yeah, we're not doing that. Such a beautiful documentary. And what about like, because it's very heartwarming, the show. And so I'm always wondering, like the line, because I like, I would always err on the side of hard

comedy. And this is this is I wouldn't say hard comedy, right? I wouldn't say that. I would say that it's comedy, but there's a lot of heart. I guess from Jean, sometimes it can be hard comedy. How do you toe the line? Like what's the most important for you and your storytelling vision? And what's most important for the show? Funny first. I mean, it is in our minds a comedy. And so we're always making sure that it's funny first

like but whether that just be the scene or or the dialogue and we do have this kind of cheat code because gene plays a stand-up so we get to like write not only stand-up jokes for her but also like you know she's a person that makes jokes constantly she's constantly joking she's constantly ribbing ava and ava's throwing it back like we get to write jokes which i think when you see a a comedy where people, whatever, work in a hospital and then they're slinging jokes, you're like, well, it feels written because there's many people that are not professional comedians who are really funny. I'm not saying that. You've never met a funny phlebotomist? I haven't. I don't think I've met a phlebotomist.

It only took me two tries to get phlebotomist out of my mouth. That was good. And that's a funny word. I'm assuming that you've had therapy in your life, right? You've been to therapy. I have indeed. You have. I have, yeah. It's impossible to live in LA and be in this industry and not go to therapy. It's like the gateway drug to therapy is being in Hollywood.

You have to go to therapy at some point if you've lived there. Okay, well, we're going to take a break and then we're going to come back and we're going to answer some caller's questions. Okay, Ball W? Okay, we'll be right back. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together on the Really No Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like...

Why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you. And the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer.

And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Bryan Cranston is with us today. How are you two? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really, No Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman.

And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really, No Really. Yeah, really. No Really. Go to reallynoreally.com. And register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason

Bobblehead. It's called Really, No Really Really and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. This week we'd love to get questions from anyone with parenting questions or step parenting questions. We'd also like to hear from any trans

or non-binary folks who would like advice from Chelsea, whether that be about friendships, dating, work issues, or anything else. Write in to DearChelseaPodcast at gmail.com. And we're back with Paul W. Downs. Hello again. And he has no relation to the other zillions of Paul Downs out there, right? Because I'm assuming that W had to be put in there. Yeah.

Well, I do have, I mean, I have a relationship to my dad, but if I didn't have the W, he might collect a residual, which is not good. You know, it's got to go to me. Are you in any way related to George W. Bush? No, it's not the W. You know, keyword for me, but yeah, no. Oh, I was just asking, just, you know, I ask every guest. Yes. Our first question comes from Elle. She says, Dear Chelsea, I'm writing to ask you about how to approach a prenup. My fiance is a self-made millionaire and has two kids. I've always known that there will be a prenup eventually, but I feel like the expectations are always changing. None of this is very romantic, and I hate going through this process.

I don't want the money he made before we were together, but having said that, I want to stand up for myself. I have no kids, I'm almost a decade younger, and I've had a successful career. But it feels like since we're starting a partnership, I should have a somewhat equal share in what happens going forward. How do you recommend handling money matters like this in a couple? L. Oh, God. Prenups are, yeah, that is, I don't know the legalities around a prenup because I'm smart enough to never have been married. Paul W., what about you? You're married. I am married. I don't have a prenup. Okay. Well, you need to get one, even though you guys share the same job. We got to do, I know that's the thing. I'm like, that's going to be tricky. No, you can get a postnup actually. That is a thing. People do

do that or they re, they, they renegotiate their prenup once they're down the road, like five or 10 years. Like who's counting? Obviously they are because they're like, all right, now it's time for this to mature. But I would say, first of all, you need an attorney that is going to have your best interest in mind. You can't rely on your fiance's attorney to have your best interest. That is not a thing. They don't have your best interests. They have his best interests. So you have to just find a lawyer and find a female lawyer, I would say,

to help negotiate your terms. And you're absolutely right. If you're going to move in and be a partnership, then there should be more of a partnership. But yeah, you're in no way entitled to anything that he made before that or any of the money that is set aside for his children. I think that's right. I think it's like, okay, we just make terms that you guys are a partnership from that point forward. I think that's right. I was once engaged very quietly to someone and as soon as I heard about the prenup, I was like, we're not doing this. It was from my business managers. Once I heard about what it would entail, I was like, nevermind. I'm not even going to have the problem to ever have to deal with. I will say our business manager did

recommend a prenup and we did not do it. Yeah. There are those people. You must have thought you were really in love at that time, Paul W. Well, we had been together for like 15 years. That's a long time. 15 years. So now you've been together 20 years? No, 18 years. No, like 17. 17. Okay. My math is sometimes a little bit off. Mine is off too. I'm like, this is kind of an approximation. It was great anyway. Well, lengths of time, durations of time is always an approximation. People are like, when did your mother die? I'm like, I don't know. It could have been a year ago. It could have been 10 years ago. I have no sense of time. Right, right, right. I have

very bad memory too. Oh, you have a really bad memory. A lot of guys have bad memories. It's impressive when you meet a guy with good memory. I sometimes have a good one, sometimes a bad one. It depends how much pot I spoke that day, but. Yep, yep. I think that's really good advice for Elle, like get your own attorney because it's not a romantic thing and it needs to just like not be romantic. Yeah, and you shouldn't even discuss it with your husband. Exactly. Just don't even discuss it. Let that lawyers deal with it. People are there to do those jobs it, you know, it's just always like, it's sticky. Yeah. So there you go, Elle.

Our first caller today is Bree. She is 37 and she's a therapist. Dear Chelsea, I'm a lesbian in my mid-30s who's worked for the last 10 years as both a child behavioral therapist and a family therapist. It can be a very difficult and very rewarding job, and I love it. At home, I have a wife who I've been with since our early 20s. We have a beautiful four-year-old daughter and are on the verge of trying for another child. We have a wonderful marriage. She's my best friend, my ride or die, and 90% of the time, things are great. Parenting is where it gets tricky. She's the one who carried our daughter and has always been a mama bear by nature.

While I'm also a mom, I often take the, quote, dad roles when parenting. Our daughter has a special bond with my wife, which is great, but sometimes it leaves me feeling a little left out. And as much as I love my job, it feels like it's working against me sometimes at home. While my wife and I often parent cohesively, we'll occasionally disagree with some parenting decisions. Unfortunately, whenever I disagree with her opinion, she automatically says that I'm being too clinical. I try not to use professional language for this reason, and I do think I do a pretty good job. Needless to say, anytime we have a parenting disagreement, her opinion always wins and she disqualifies mine due to my profession. My wife struggles with a lot of

insecurity and I can see some of the same traits developing in our daughter. I've tried to explain that there are things we can do as parents to build our daughter's self-confidence, but my words fall on deaf ears and she does get defensive. I've suggested seeing a family therapist ourselves, but she revealed to me that she doesn't believe in therapy, which is a whole other dilemma. Is it better for me to back down and go along with her instincts as a mom, sometimes against my better judgment and training? Am I really letting my career blur my natural parenting? Brie. Hi, Brie.

Hi. Hi. This is our special guest today, Paul W. Downs. Hi. Hi, hi. That's so, it's not funny, but it's very funny that you're that's like being a ghostbuster and having your spouse not believe in ghosts. That's fucked up. Yeah, it's been challenging. People cannot not be open to therapy. Like that's just so stupid to say you need a parenting counselor, somebody who can talk to both of you because it's not cool that she's disagreeing with you. You guys are supposed to be on the same team. Yeah. And I,

you know, I think a lot of it had to do with the fact that when I when our daughter was first born, you know, I'm not great with newborns. That was did not come naturally to me. I was awkward. I fumbled around a lot. And I think she sort of panicked and pulled back. And, you know, my expertise is really from five and above. And so I think she was like,icked and pulled back. And, you know, my expertise is really from five and above. And so I think she was like, you know what, we're done. I'm going to make the decisions and you can be over here. Okay. Well, that's that you can't be relegated to like a second in command.

A, I wouldn't worry about that. People bond with children at different ages. Like, don't worry about not bonding to the same level when she was an infant. Is your daughter? Yeah. A daughter. So don't worry about that. You're going to have your own bonding with her at whatever age it's going to happen. That always shakes itself out. But your wife seems to be the bigger issue, which is you have to get her to understand that she doesn't get to decide. She's not the only parent in this unit. This family unit has two parents and she's dominating. Yeah. And she's never dominated in anything before. I've always been that kind of person

too. So I'm like, Oh, I'm good with whatever. I make all the decisions for a lot of things, which can be frustrating because I love a back and forth. And so now she's like, you know what? I've never done anything and made any decisions. Now I'm going to stand up for myself and make all these decisions. And it's hard to argue with that. But I'd like to be a role in my daughter's life. And you have every right to be a role in your daughter's life. So like, yeah, that's the most important thing. It's not about who's right or who's wrong. It's about both being open to listening to each other's opinions. You do family therapy, right? Yeah, I'm a family therapist and a child behavioral therapist. Yeah. Okay, so what would you say? I'm like, you know, I'm like, I this is so hard because you're,

you're in it. But yeah, this is fascinating. This is hard. I mean, the immediate thought that would come to mind for me is there's clearly some trust issues on her end in terms, she did have a very traumatic childhood. There is a lot of trust background issues there. She doesn't believe in therapy because she doesn't trust the process. She doesn't trust that someone, a stranger could help her with what she experienced. And she doesn't trust other people to help make big decisions like myself for our daughter. And at first, before we had a child, it was easier because, you know, it was just the two of us. And now there's a whole human life here that is

impacting our ability to trust each other, basically. So that would be my first thought, is there's some trust building to have to occur here, but I don't know how to do it. Well, especially with what you just said earlier, which is that she, you made all the decisions until this, and you're a child psychologist or a behavioralist. And so she's looking at you like, oh no, no, no, this is another thing you're going to dominate. And now she's stepping in and going, no, I'm going to take this role. So with that information, with everything you said, that sounds pretty kind of textbook. So you should be able to handle this without us. And how old is she?

Your daughter, not your wife. She's four and a half now. Four and a half. Okay. Yeah. You're about to get to your expertise. Yes. And, you know, I'd love another child, but I don't want to go through all this over again.

Okay. Well, you have to get into therapy together. She can't, that attitude isn't going to be good for your marriage or your relationship or your family dynamic. So you've got to really work on that and work on that. Do you see someone? Yes, I do. Well, talk to your person about that. I mean, I know you're trying to talk to us about it, but you should also talk to your person and see what they say. Like, what is an organic way for you to bring her in where she doesn't feel threatened and she doesn't feel it's about her.

And you can organically bring the conversation in around whatever the pretense of her coming to therapy, which is you want to make sure that you're staying connected. Maybe you don't feel so connected to her. Yeah, that's true. And I don't think you go in saying like staking your claim of what you think you're missing. I think you go in like, I want us to be more unified as parents and I want to be closer to you and acknowledge the closeness she has with your daughter without sounding like it's a threat. You know what I mean? Like, it's so great the way that you've stepped in. It makes my life.

It's so nice to know she's in such safe hands, you know, that obviously it's her mother, but still like people need to hear those things, you know, and that's usually where the insecurity lies. It's like this deep rooted fear that you're not doing a good enough job at whatever it is you're doing. Right. I think you've hit the nail on the head there with her. I think that you're absolutely right. She would respond much better to a positive approach there instead of in the past, we would just combat. I would say, why am I not allowed in on this? And she would get defensive. So I think that's absolutely right. Yeah. Yeah. With people who get defensive, it's just like you have to just like pour

love over them over and over and over again until they just melt and give up. Yeah. It's almost like you want to say, can you come to my session? Because I want you to help me with this thing. Yes, exactly. I'm feeling sad about this thing. And maybe you can shed some light on the situation with my therapist. Like, you know, if you make it more about what you need and not what they need to change, that might be helpful. And I think that's right. It's just about like being like, you're so great at all these things. Sometimes I don't feel what, you know, I do feel like sometimes people do the counterbalance. I do the yin to the yang. And it's like, it might be the case that she's like, no, you're great.

You're a great parent. You also studied this. You went to school for it. And, you know, I do believe in it. Absolutely. But you can still feel inadequate within a relationship. And that's a good descriptor to use for the way you feel to her because that makes it, you know, it's not aggressive. Yeah. And I think there was also that second layer for me of I was, I'm not a blood parent. And so I was already feeling insignificant that I didn't have the same role in my daughter's life with that whole second parent, but not blood parent situation. So that really haunted me for a while as well i'm working

on that when you you know you said that you're thinking about another child are you is she going to carry again and use her own eggs and everything yep yeah so same situations uh full blood sibling you're having honest feelings about that reservations right you said yeah yeah yeah so you gotta like get this it's gonna be fine you just have to get her to a place where you have to really come from a place where you're sharing it with her rather than prescribing it to her. Yeah, absolutely. You know, I'm just navigating both her and being, you know, a same sex couple with same sex parenting, which we don't have a lot of examples to pull from. So we're sort of making it up on the fly. Just follow Brandi Carlile on Instagram. She and her wife seem to make it work, even though Brandi Carlile is on.

Can you join a band and go on tour? That seems to be a great place. I have no talent. Get out of the house. Can you start doing stand-up? That's your answer. No talent there either. Most people don't know. Okay. Well, good luck

with everything and keep us posted. Let us know if that works out and you get her to come to therapy. Awesome. Maybe I'll get her to come here and get therapy from you. Yeah. Tell her to call Dear Chelsea. Yeah. Bring her on. Yeah. That's fun. That's good. We are looking for couples. I'm not fucking joking. I know. I like talking to couples. So if you could get her to do it, we'll set it up. All right. Thank you guys so much. Thanks, Brie.

Bye, Brie. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together on the Really No Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal?

The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Brian Cranston is with us today. How are you, too?

Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really No Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really No Really. Yeah, really. No really. Go to reallynoreally.com and register to win $500 a guest spot on our podcast or a limited edition sign Jason bobblehead. It's called really know really and you can find it on the I heart radio app on Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Paul, do you defer to your wife about your child about your parenting? Like or does she defer to you? Who's in charge? I think it depends on the moment i feel like we

both we both have our thoughts i mean sometimes it differs but it's it's so it's so minor it's usually around like should we keep him up in the car before nap time you know what i mean it's stuff like that but i get what brie was saying about even because i feel like dads feel this way too even if they are blood related it's like well they didn't carry the child they also didn't if they if the child was breastfed they didn't breastfeed and there's like a bond that happens there and in the beginning dad the dad is kind of like the butler not you know he's just like making sure everybody has the things but not really doing as much so i do get that i get what brie's talking about yeah i would definitely like i even hearing it like there's one birth parent and then there's one so you're

assuming a male role almost because you're like the dad or a traditional male role. But I would feel that like if I was in a lesbian relationship and my wife carried the baby, I'd be like, all right, what am I, an odd man out? It's like how you feel after a threesome, you know, when you're the extra. Just like that. It's like how Paul W. feels every day in his workplace. Paul W. always feels the post threesome. I can tell. Oh, by the way, Paul, I just agreed to do a residency in Vegas at the Cosmopolitan once

a month. I know. Congrats. I love that. I was inspired by the show. No, get out of here. Get out of here. But I read that you guys spend so much time in Vegas.

So you actually have to live there part-time when you're shooting, right? We actually hate to say it. We shoot mostly in LA. We're only there for like three days a season. Oh, okay. Okay.

That makes sense. We do love the Vegas portion of our shoot. We love going there and you know, it's so it's, it is the show. So I love Vegas. I think it's, I love the way her house is in Vegas with that long drive.

I love when a driveway isn't, is too long to be called a driveway and it's just a drive. That's what I say whenever I go to Ted Sarandos' house. It's like, it's a drive, you know, like it's a whole, it loops around the property and you're like, Ooh, am I at Never Neverland? I want to go. Everybody I know is going. I got to go. Yeah, I got to go to Ted. They're the best hosts. Okay. So, yeah, I love the way her comes into her house. I'm like, oh, God, that's the only way you could get anyone to move to Vegas is to give them some sprawling indoor amusement park for a house. You know, basically, like, you have all the fixings you need here.

You don't ever have to leave because it's fucking hot there. Are you going to live there? No. No, no, no. Are you going to now? I literally go. I fly. I perform once a month. So it's like. Oh, oh, no. Are you going to now? I literally go, I fly, I perform once a month.

So it's like, it's not like a weekly thing. Right, right. I tried to calculate in my head how many hours in a row I could stay in Vegas while also remaining stable. You know what I mean? I do. I can't be trusted in areas like that or Monte Carlo. Oh, wow.

Oh, Monte Carlo would be really fun. I would see you there. I've been dying to throw Monte Carlo into something. I love that. What do we have? What's next? Well, now that we've hit Monte Carlo, our next caller is Kelly. Kelly is 29 and says, Dear Chelsea, I write to you because I need you to help me get the hell over a fear. My partner is a world traveler. It's one of her favorite things. She would love nothing more than to go somewhere extra cool with me.

I also love to travel and take vacations, but usually ones I can drive to. You see, I'm afraid of planes. She and I have been together for four years now. She's been patient and supportive, but it has been four years and I owe it to her and me to shake it off. I refuse to fly for about 20 years now. I think my avoidance is rooted in past experience of turbulence, fear of no exit or control, a fatal plane crash occurring in a city my partner was visiting at the time, intrusive thoughts, and overall anxiety. My therapist is on board to help me through the plane fear, even via virtual reality. My doctor has given me Ativan to use on my first ever adult flight, whenever that may be. In conclusion, I'm getting good building blocks toward my first flight, but the thought still horrifies me.

I need Chelsea Handler to tell me to get the hell over it, maybe. Tell me, what's so good about flying? Your advice will help my partner like me even more, Kelly. And Kelly, I do need you to tell us what you told me on our call together about like the last time you flew and when that was. Yes. Hello, everyone. Hi. Welcome. Thank you so much. Thanks for having me. So my last flight was in 2005. I was very young and Hurricane Katrina was basically hitting as we were leaving. The hurricane was hitting and hitting turbulence in the air.

Just all of that combined really freaked me out. Yeah, but you're fine. You're fine now. Nothing happened. So look, the worst thing happened and you're fine. I mean, the worst thing didn't happen, but it came close to happening or what you think was going to cause that. First of all, I don't know if this will help you, but it helped me a long time ago.

I don't have a fear of flying, but I remember someone telling me that when you're experiencing turbulence, it's almost like the opposite of crashing. Like it is the most normal expected thing to happen and that planes don't get into trouble during turbulence. That's not what causes planes to go, you know. I mean, maybe with weather changing the way it is because of climate change, that it could escalate to that, but that's not where crashes come from, turbulence. So you should know that and write that down in front of you

so you can read that over and over again. You know what I mean? For when you fly, I'm fucking serious. What, but just you are fine? You are fine. You are safe. You are fine. I am safe, blah, blah, blah. Over

and over and over again to yourself to calm yourself down while you're on the plane. And Ativan didn't help you? I haven't tried it yet. Oh, it's going to be great. You're going to love it. The other thing is I would recommend you go to a hypnotist to try to get over this because Kerry Gaynor's in LA, but that would require a flight. So I don't know. I went to him for smoking cigarettes. I have tons of people. Do you know who he is?

I've heard of him, yes. Yeah, like he's this famous hypnotist who is- I had a friend who went for candy for like a sugar addiction. I had a friend who went for biting her toenails, okay? Apparently the two biggest phobias are spiders and flying. Those are the, or no, sorry. Fear of public speaking and flying. Spiders are scary too.

We feel for the spider fear of people. But can you look up a hypnotist? You have to try it. You do it three times and you will, like, it works for a lot of people. So don't rule that out. And you know, my uncle flies planes and I'm like this is crazy this is scary but you know what he said to me and it actually is in my head all the time planes want to stay in the air the way that they're designed they don't they it's hard to get them down actually the landing is not to scare you one of the one of the most treacherous parts okay because that wasn't necessary to say that wasn't helpful what are you doing right now so she gets on the plane she's so

okay and then she remembers what you said about the landing that's the last five minutes Paul W., what are you doing right now? So she gets on the plane. She's so excited. Okay. And then she remembers what you said about the fucking landing. That's the last five minutes. Yeah, but then it's all over. Then you've ruined the whole flight. You've ruined my next flight, too. It's not dangerous to land. It's fine.

It's all safe. It's safer than driving in a car. You know that. You've heard the stats. It is safer than driving in a car. Have you been in a, have you been in a golf cart? Yeah. So golf carts don't really have a suspension that lets them, I mean, they're really bouncy, but they don't tip over. They don't roll. You know what I mean? That's exactly what turbulence is. It's like, it's like bounces. It's not going to make the plane

fall out of the air. It's like being in a golf cart. And I do, I know that sounds crazy, but I do think because turbulence, I don't love it either. I don't know who loves turbulence, but I do think about the golf cart analogy whenever there's turbulence. And also that the plane wants to be in the air. I don't think that line of thinking is helpful at all. Does that make you feel better? Yes. I wrote all those down. Great. It's also like an overstimulation thing and not liking to be around people and have no escape. So I'm wondering if I should escape for like a first class flight that might. Yeah, that will help a lot. Ativan and first class will really help.

Also, I think turbulence is less apparent in the front, I think. Yeah. Okay. I took Ativan for flying because there was like a period where I was pretty nervous flyer. And it like, you still think like, oh, I might die. But like, it makes you not care

that you might die. It just takes that away. I will also say TikTok. There are a lot of people on there who are like, let me walk you through the different sounds you're going to hear as you're taking off or as you're landing. And here's why they're not scary.

I recently stumbled across this and it made my next flight like so much easier hop to download tiktok yes well let's not get ahead of ourselves if you don't have tiktok yet don't ruin it probably stay away from it and just look up what she's talking about yeah don't download on youtube too um but does any of that help you definitely definitely i'm just really grateful. You can do it. Thank you. It's going to be so worth it.

You're going to love it. Yeah. I just want to pick a place I really want to go to and that it'll feel really worth it. And hearing your words of encouragement is super helpful. Yeah. Get after it because once you get that first flight down, then you can travel wherever you want,

girl. And that's the, that's the key to the rest of your life, like looking and seeing different new places. I mean, how exciting is that to know that you can go and travel around the world and you're not going to be scared? You're right. If Courtney can get Travis Barker to fly again, you can fly again. I think Courtney could get Travis Barker to do a lot of things that he hasn't done in a long time. He seems pretty devoted to her.

I think that's true. Okay, well, good luck with everything. Take care pretty devoted to her. I think that's true. Okay. Well, good luck with everything. Take care. Thank you so much. Take care. Bye. I don't like these requests when people say,

I want Chelsea to tell me to get my shit together. I want Chelsea to tell me to go for a flight. Cause it's like, that's all I have to say then. Like they're not letting me decide what to say. Then I'm just like, go do it. I think we gave her a lot of stuff though.

I think it was good. Well, we did cover a lot of stuff, though. I think it was good. Well, we did cover a lot of stuff. Thank God Paul was here. People just don't have, like, Chelsea Handler confidence. So they're like, give that to me. It's not confidence. It's that I don't care. You know what I mean?

Long enough to make a choice. I'm just like, let's go. Keep moving. Also, if you haven't checked out my opening dates in Vegas, check them out. They're on my website, ChelseaHandler.com. We announced four dates in Vegas, plus my other cities that I'm coming to. Get your tickets at ChelseaHandler.com before this tour finally fucking

wraps up. We're going to take a quick break. Paul, put your coffee down. You're on camera. I thought it was a break. We're going to take a break, and Paul, W, and I are going to be back. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together on the Really No Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like

why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts?

His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's gonna drop by. Mr. Brian Cranston is with us today. How are you, too? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really, No Really, sir. God bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging.

Really? That's the opening? Really No Really. Yeah, really. No really. Go to reallynoreally.com. And register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. It's called Really No Really, and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. We're back.

All right. Our last email comes from Kim. She says, Dear Chelsea, I recently went through my first adult breakup. My wife and I were together for 12 years, married for seven, and it has been the most difficult thing I've ever had to grow through. I live a double life, split between corporate America and being a comedian. I've been in a love-hate relationship with stand-up since 2006, and right before the pandemic, I co-wrote a web series that we finally put in the festival circuit. I'm considering getting back on stage, and of course, all my stand-up friends are like, you have so much material. Let's just say that the way my marriage ended is very complicated and involves a hypnotist,

a magician, a clown, and possibly a cult. Can we get that hypnotist number for the other caller? Let's hope so. I don't know if I have a Lifetime original movie on my hands or comedy gold, but it's something. That's the background, and here's the dilemma. My ex asked me to keep some information about our breakup on the DL because it could affect her career. Although I can easily tell jokes and not say her name directly, things do tend to end up on the internet and people that know us will very quickly put two

and two together. I'm also not sure what protections I have if I decided to write a script or something that's quote based on true events. I'm torn between feeling the need to protect someone that honestly really hurt me and wanting to dive back into my comedy world and tell my story. Kim. I don't know what the legalities around that are because I know about writing a book, how you have to change things for people so that no one can recognize who you're talking about.

But you can still talk about the people, things that experiences you've had. You just have to shroud who that other person is. And I don't know if just being in front of people who know that you dated her is enough of a connection. That's still your experience. You're not calling her out. You've had other girlfriends, I'm sure.

Well, maybe it's been a long time, it sounded like, so maybe not. But I think you can talk about her without, don't say her name, don't do that. If somebody asks for privacy, everyone has a right to privacy, even though I don't respect that, you know, but I think you should definitely pursue standup and see what you've got in this material because nothing is funny like tragedy, really nothing.

You give anything two weeks and it is cooked perfectly to bring it out and start sharing it. So I am a firm believer in the darker the moment, the funnier, the potential for funny is greater. 100%. I think that the saddest stuff can be the funniest. And also, if you have material that, I mean, it sounds pretty rich. That material sounds good. It feels like you have to do it, especially if the person hurt you. I get it. We don't want to expose the person. That person has a right to privacy. But I don't know. Unless you have an hour of material about this woman who then, you know, you tape a special and it becomes huge.

I don't think it's going to impact her career. You know, people you guys have in common might be like, oh, they had a clown? Yeah, exactly. By the time you would get a comedy special, you're going to have had more girlfriends. So there's no direct relationship. I understand you've been with someone for 12 years so when you say your ex everyone knows who knows you knows who you're talking about but not everybody knows who you're talking about so it is kind of a murky area but comics do it all the time my whole first set was about my ex-boyfriend finding him cheating on me with not one but two women I added the second one

for storytelling purposes there was really only one woman. But, like, I talked about him for, like, that was my first set, was just how walking in on my boyfriend cheating on me. So you can, I mean, people, that's what everyone is doing. Taylor Swift just wrote a song about Kim Kardashian and called it Thank You, Amy. And it's about Kim. We all know it's about Kim Kardashian.

So, you know, I would just say keep it. You've never said her name out loud. Don't say it. So you don't get yourself in trouble. But definitely pursue stand up. And if it you know, if you feeling it and it's vibing, then then continue. Conversely, if the opposite is true as well, don't continue. OK, well, we're going to wrap up with you. You're such a cutie pie, Paul W. Downs. I had such a fun time with you today. I am. It is an honor andie pie, Paul W. Downs. I had such a fun time with you today. I am. It is an honor and a pleasure. Thank you for having me. Okay, well, I wish you well. Say hi to my friends, Hannah and Jen Statsky. Tell her I say hello too from childhood.

I will indeed. Yeah. And then I'm going to tell Jean to come on. Oh yeah, tell Jean I want her on too. Yes, absolutely. You have to write a part for me to come on so I can either have a love scene with... No, I can't have a love scene. I can't even have a love scene with a man. I once did. I once had to do a movie and they this is how bad you guys I was. I was had to do a movie with this actor and they wanted me to open mouth kiss him. And I took one look at this guy and I was like, I can't do that. You know, like I can't kiss this man. I just won't. And I so I went to the director and I was like I know this scene is about us like making out but obviously like let's fake that because

I'm not interested in this and he's like well it's in the script like you have to act and I was like no no no it's not happening like I'm not making out with that kid he was like 10 years younger than me it felt disgusting and it was there was a situation and I was like no no and then finally i was like i don't know what to tell you to the director i don't know what to tell you it's not gonna happen so finally he's like okay well what can happen i was like we could touch arms and and then we're gonna turn our back to the camera no you don't want to hire me from everything for anything i'm terrible well okay i'll keep that in mind okay keep that in mind keep my behavior in mind i would love to um thank you so much, Paul W. We love you. Thank you for having

me. I love you guys. Everyone tune in to season three of Hacks if you haven't seen it already. It's streaming on Max. Okay. So upcoming shows that I have, you guys, these are the places I'm coming in May. Prior Lake, Minnesota, Verona, New York, Auckland, New Zealand, Wellington, New Zealand, Melbourne, Australia, Brisbane, Australia, Sydney, Australia. We've added second shows to places that have sold out the first. And then I'm going to be in Hawaii on Maui, Kahului, and Honolulu. I will be there in July. Also in July, I'm coming to Niagara Falls on July 27th. I'm coming to Hollywood, Florida for my only show in Florida on July 28th. I'll be in Auburn, Washington on August 1st. And then Santa Rosa, California for my second show August 2nd.

And then I'm coming to Atlantic City. Mateo Lane and I are co-headlining a really fun show in Atlantic City this summer, August 10th. August 17th is the Santa Barbara Bowl. You do not want to miss that. And then I will be all over Maine, Charlotte, North Carolina, Charleston, South Carolina. I'm coming to Texas. I'm coming to St. Louis and Kansas City. I'm coming to Brooklyn, New York at the King's Theater on November 8th.

And I have tickets on sale throughout the end of the year in December. So if you're in a city like Philadelphia or Bethlehem or San Diego or New Orleans or Omaha, check ChelseaHandler.com for tickets. Okay. If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email at DearChelseaPodcast at gmail.com and be sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brad Dickert, executive producer Catherine Law. And be sure to check out our merch at ChelseaHandler.com. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden.

And together, our mission on the Really Know Really podcast is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like... Why the bathroom door doesn't go all the way to the floor? What's in the museum of failure? And does your dog truly love you? We have the answer. Go to reallynoreally.com and register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. The Really No Really podcast.

Follow us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.