Dear Chelsea - Let’s Get Down to Business with Vanessa Gonzalez

Episode Date: July 21, 2022

Vaccinated and Horny tour opener Vanessa Gonzalez joins Chelsea this week to talk about nude men approaching the stage, life on the road, and why it’s vital to ensure a variety of meats are present at every performance.  Then: At 23-year-old debates whether or not to tie her tubes.  A lesbian wonders if her bestie is secretly into her.  And a new bride is devastated when her beloved cousin ghosts her on her wedding day. * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Nick Stumpf Produced by Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brandon Dickert * * * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together, our mission on the Really Know Really podcast is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why the bathroom door doesn't go all the way to the floor, what's in the museum of failure, and does your dog truly love you? We have the answer. Go to reallyknowreally.com

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Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season, but, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E, Jonathan Sheckner, Billy Porter, and so many more.

Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You gotta check them out. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Happy holidays from me, Michael Rappaport, and my gift to you is a free subscription to the I Am Rappaport Stereo Podcast,

where I discuss entertainment, sports, politics, and anything and everything that catches my attention. I am here to call it as I see it. And there's a whole lot of things catching my eyes these days. Listen to the I Am Rap Report Stereo Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, everybody. Good afternoon. It's Thursday.

Hello. Hi. Hi. Chelsea, you It's Thursday. Hello. Hi. Chelsea, you've had a big week this week. I did. I made an announcement that Joe Coy and I are no longer together. So I announced that on my Instagram page, as one does. have been such a public couple that it was only appropriate to publicly break up or let everybody know because people were so invested in our relationship and so supportive, which was so moving to me. And it was really heartfelt to always hear how, you know, everybody loved it and was so inspired. And how I just wanted to let everyone know that it is, you know, an ending, but it's a beginning.

And it's not something that is going to break either one of us. And that I have more hope than I ever have about love and finding love. And I now know that it's possible in the least in the places you least expect it. I believe that I believe that for everyone, for me, and for everyone else, and that my heart is open, and it's not going to shut, you know, it's now I'm open to the idea of spending my life with someone and I hadn't been for a really long time. Your post was so beautiful. And, you know, I can tell that you both learned so much from each other. And I think that's really all we can ask from a relationship is like not necessarily till death do us part. But like, what, how did you become more yourself? And how? What did you

learn about yourself when you were in that relationship for the good parts of yourself and the bad parts of yourself? You two are wonderful together. And I know, you know, you said you'll, you'll still be friends. And yeah, yeah, you know, I mean, it's hard to go through a breakup, obviously, but it's important to go through it and not avoid it and not distract and deflect. And like, I, I'm very against that. I'm very much about sitting in my pain and understanding that something I, you know, that I hoped was going to work out, did not work out. And he changed me in so many wonderful ways. You know, he really fired up my work ethic again and my ambition again, and I and my desire to do things and be productive and have a voice and use my voice instead of, you know, there's so many times big beacon of light in my life that I he's unforgettable. And I like will take a lot of that with me into my next phase of life.

And I just I don't want people to be heartbroken, like on our behalf. Like it's a beautiful thing to be loved like that, you know, and to love someone like that. It's really beautiful. And I'll never let go of that because I know that it's out there now and it's possible. And I want everyone else to know that it's possible too. And the only work you can do is on yourself and, you know, and, and get through it and understand that, you know, nothing in life is really that permanent. And I did my best. And that wasn't enough. Yeah. And like they say, when you're going through something, keep going. That's such a shift from where you were several years ago,

I mean, just look at how you're experiencing this loss. Like you are experiencing it. You're not closing your mind to it. And like, that's done. That's over. I'm not going to think about it anymore. Like you said so many times on this show, how, you know, when a relationship, friendship or otherwise was over,

it was just like that door is closed. I don't even think about them anymore. And what, I can't imagine a healthier way to be processing this than you are right now. Oh, thank you. Thank you. I'm definitely, this than you are right now. Oh, thank you. Thank you. I'm definitely, this is my first adult breakup. Even though it's public, it's like, I've handled this

with as much adult technique and skill as I've been taught through therapy. Thank you, Dan Siegel. You know, like, I know that I've acted with dignity and with grace, and I am giving nothing but love, putting love out there, because I know that he needs that and everyone needs it and I need it. And I now know that that's the way to break up with love, not with anger. Yeah. Thank you so much for sharing that. I know anytime you go through a breakup, it's incredibly hard. And it's really brave of you to share all of that. I think I speak for all of the listeners out there when I say we're rooting for you both

and really can't wait to see what the next chapter is. Oh, thank you. Thank you. So as we transition into our episode, how would you feel if I tell you about something totally ridiculous that happened to me this week yeah let's do a light thing a light thing so I just got back from Wisconsin I was there for a memorial but it's for an aunt who passed away several years ago she was one of our favorite aunts but you know nice it was really wonderful to be with all my like my favorite cousins like the OG like yes the the fun cousins yeah I have a line in one of my books where I say like sisters are great but like your cousin will

help you like order vodka in an omelet you know like your sisters are slightly protective whereas cousins are down for the same party you were down yes they are and uh yeah I love I love cousins I have so many cousins too I'll bet it's nice that you went back for a memorial. That's a really nice way to honor your aunt. Yeah. Well, my aunts and uncles had had a cabin up in the north woods of Wisconsin, Manitowish Waters, if we have any listeners there. And I used to go up there with them. But this one aunt, she had emphysema. And so it was always easier for her to be up there, especially during the summers, and loved it up there. So she asked for her ashes to be spread there. And we finally all got it together.

And we went up and it was just a beautiful time. This side of the family, my uncle is Nigerian. And so we all just like are loud and eat spicy food together. And we just like try to make each other scream, laugh as loud as possible. It is the most fun. It's just a really great time. Oh, I love that. That is fun. Yeah. That means everyone's in the right age range. Yes. Yeah. We're all kind of like we grew up together nearby each other and also kind of have kind of similar age ranges as well. Cute. Cute. Love that. So we're up in the northwest of Wisconsin. The place we

stayed at, I think, has not been touched since like the 70s. Like green carpet on all the floors. There's like animal heads on all the walls. A beautiful area on the lake. So we had a great time. But we stayed in this lodge that was like built in 1909 and it definitely looked and felt it. But we had a great time together, all drinking out on the porch and getting bitten by mosquitoes and that sort of thing. People talk about like when a loved one visits them and it's like they see a bird and it reminds me, it reminds them of their mother or, you know, a butterfly and it reminds them of their grandfather or whatever. And so we went to this really special place on a lake and I kept thinking like, I wonder if Deb is going to visit us. You know, we had some tears. We had some laughs. We

really remembered her. And it's so sweet. It was it was really beautiful. We were up on honor, like to honor someone like that is so honorable. Yeah. I'm just thinking of different ways I can use the word honor. Honoree. She was our honoree. Our honorary. So, you know, we decided we'd all take a picture of this beautiful lake that she loved. And so there was a small dock there because it was sort of a boat launch.

And several of my cousins and I, we went out on the dock. And it was a little rickety, but, you know, we didn't think too much of it. So we got there. We take a few pictures. Then we decide, well, let's get everybody up on this dock and take a beautiful picture with this vista. While everybody gets on the dock, my nephew sort of says, oh, hey, like, is this going to be safe for us all? Because it's a little bendy. My sister's like, it's got bolts and stuff. It's fine. So we all get up there. Brad, my husband,

is setting up the picture on the shore. All of a sudden, somebody goes, it's moving. It's moving. And this whole dog collapsed into the water. Oh, my God. I love it. It was the most ridiculous thing. Like my, like everyone is fine. Like no one was hurt at all. But like, there was a moment where like my, my nephew's leg got kind of like trapped in one of the boards. And so we all like bailed off. I bailed off the side in the most inelegant way possible. I got wet up to my collarbones in one foot of water somehow, like soaking wet. Anyway, everyone was totally fine. No one was hurt.

And I was like, that was how Aunt Deb showed up. Yeah, exactly. She was like, enough of this crying. So everyone was in the water. Everyone was in the water. Like we were sopping wet. And sorry, Papoose Lake, you needed a new dog. Okay, I have a water falling in story as well from this weekend.

Yes. So I was with my cousins also up in Malibu or Topanga. We had like a cookout on the beach. And I had some friends and all my cousins were there. And then my two little cousins, Ella and Gray, who are my cousins' babies. Well, they're not babies. They're 11 and 13. So whatever.

Well, that's not 30. Babies too. Anyway, I was on pylons you know how the pylons go into the water yes I was obviously intoxicated and I was taking Ella as her guardian yes across the pylons and she was like you know we're walking and it was the waves were crashing and coming in and I was like okay I'm like oh it's fine I'm so good with balance so you know I and I'm walking along walking along and then she's like oh I'm like, oh, it's fine. I'm so good with balance. You know, and I'm walking along, walking along. And then she's like, oh, I'm getting scared.

I'm getting scared. I go, okay, let's sit down. So I go to sit down. And as I sit down, I lose my balance and just fucking dive right into the sand. Head first into the water was crashing, but the sand was not, you know, it wasn't high. So I face first into the sand, white shirt, my nipples completely exposed. I was in jeans, completely soaked. Oh, that's the worst.

And I look up at my niece, or she's my cousin, but she feels like my niece. And I look up at my cousin and she's like, I didn't do that. I didn't push you. I was like, no, I know you didn't. I was like, I'm drunk. And I'm a fucking drunk. Now I'm a drunk aunt. Like I'm a drunk elderly aunt walking around the pylons to my whole family.

And they all look at it and go, put a fucking shirt over your nipples. Like I had one on. They're like, what happened? I was like, I was me too'd by the pylons. It was really humiliating, but totally classic me. But yeah, two water incidents. Oh my goodness. We should focus on water excursions for this episode.

We absolutely should. We have one of my favorite peoples here today. She's the opener on my Vaccinated and Horny Tour. And if you haven't seen me on my Vaccinated and Horny Tour, I am coming to the Just for Laughs Montreal Comedy Festival, July 28th. I am coming to Vancouver, August 12th, and Cal Calgary August 13th and August 14th. So I have two shows in Vancouver on the 12th and then two shows in Calgary. And then after that, I have a whole new slew of dates starting in Saratoga in October.

I'm coming to all parts of Florida. So you're welcome. Tampa, Tampa, Tampa. I have two shows in Tampa and then a bunch of other places. Colorado Springs, Colorado. Just go to Chelsea Handler. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden.

And together on the Really No Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth.

Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Bryan Cranston is with us today. How are you two? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really, No Really, sir.

Bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really, No Really. Yeah, Really. No Really. Go to reallynoreally.com.

And register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. It's called Really No Really, and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Amanda Mull, who writes our Business Week Buying Power column. Very few companies who go viral are like totally prepared for what that means. And Zoe Tillman, senior legal reporter. Courts are not supposed to decide elections.

Courts are not really supposed to play a big role in choosing our elected leaders. It's for the voters to decide. Follow the Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. Good people, what's up? It's Questo, Questlove. And Team Supreme and I have been working hard to bring you some incredible episodes of Questlove Supreme with gifts you definitely don't want to miss. Now, one of the things I love about this Questlove Supreme podcast is we got something for everybody, every type of musical effort. We enjoy speaking to the people who are the face of some movements, some people you've seen on stage or TV or magazine covers. But we also love speaking to the folks who are making it happen behind the scenes and pave the way for those that followed.

You know, keystones to the culture. This season, we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations, like I'm Pete Bill chatting up with hitmaker Sam Hollander, Sugar Steve chatting with the legend Nick Lowe, and I've had pleasures of doing one-on-one conversations with Willow, Sonata Matreya, Kathleen Hanna, and The RZA.

These are conversations you won't hear anywhere else, so make sure you go back and you check those episodes out, alright? Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, hear anywhere else. So make sure you go back and you check those episodes out, all right? Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Did you know that companies hire the most in the first two months of the year, or that nearly half of workers are worried about being left behind?

I am Andrew Seaman, LinkedIn's Editor-at-large for jobs and career development. And my show, Get Hired, brings you all the information you need to, well, get hired. People are forming opinions of you even before you log into the Zoom or walk into the room. And so you really have to think about, what is it I want to display? You don't plant a garden and then just walk away and expect it to thrive. You are in there pulling out the weeds. You're pruning it. You're watering it. It's the same thing with your network. You should always be in there actively managing your network. If you don't feel confident to say a number, even admitting that to a recruiter is going to be far better than saying, well, what

is your budget for the role? A lot is in the follow-up, right? Don't wait to follow up. Whether you're a new grad, an established professional, or contemplating a career change, Get Hired is for you. Listen to Get Hired with Andrew Seaman on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you like to listen. Happy holidays from me, Michael Rapoport, and my gift to you is a free subscription to the I Am Rapoport Stereo Podcast, where I discuss entertainment, sports, politics, and anything and everything that catches my attention. I am here to call it as I see it, and there's a whole lot of things catching my eyes these days. Here's a clip from one of my favorite episodes. You are not a real fighter. You will never be discussed anywhere in boxing

history ever. Fake Paul. The movie is The Apprentice and the movie is about young Donald Trump and his apprentice, Roy Cohen. Real character, obviously both are real characters. It kind of has a Scarface vibe to it which I thought was very interesting listen to the I Am Rap Report stereo podcast on the iHeartRadio app Apple podcast and wherever you get your podcast let me introduce my opener she opens for me on the road for my vaccinated and horny tour. She is fucking hilarious. She resides in Austin, Texas. Please welcome Vanessa Gonzalez. Hi, Vanessa. Hello. Oh, hello. You look like you're about to start a job interview. Oh, yes. I hope I get the job.

You guys, this is Vanessa Gonzalez. Have you met Vanessa yet? We talked on the phone and she's a delight. Well, you probably saw her open for me at the Wiltern too. I did. It was so much fun. Yeah, those were great shows. We've been having a lot of great shows. Vanessa has been on the road with me for the most part,

for most of my vaccinated and horny tour. Every once in a while, we have to replace her because of her attitude or she has an improper sexual relationship with one of our representatives from Live Nation. So that's been a big thorn in our side because she doesn't understand the moment we're living in. And he reported her because he's a white male and he was being sexually harassed by her. You know, it's hard to navigate the entertainment business. His name is Brandon Bucar, in case anyone needs to look him up. We have a guy that runs our tour for us and I say run in very loose terms

because he's not running fucking anything. And there are more mistakes than there are victory laps, but he loves the good, the greatest thing about Brandon is, well a we love brandon but he's such a good sport about us making so much fun of him oh god you know because he is just kind of a middle-aged white guy and he thinks he's with it and he's not with it he spelled ness's last name wrong for the better part of six months excellent. It's pretty common. Yeah, he's figuring it out. It's hard. His job's hard. Yeah, for him it is.

Right. I would like to also mention that Vanessa was recently named one of Variety's Top Ten Comics to Watch Out For. Yay! So big congratulations on that, Vanessa. Well deserved. Oh, thank you so much. Yeah, it's been wild. It's been a wild ride this year. Well deserved. Oh, thank you so much. Yeah, that's it's been wild. It's been

a wild ride this year. So fun. So Vanessa is based out of Austin. And I found her through the woman who runs my production company named Jackie Sosa. She knew of Vanessa and I was looking for women to open for me. And so she sent me Vanessa's info. And then I started stalking her online. And she and then we've had some pretty exciting times. We've had some long journeys. Yeah. You know how much I love the word journey. We have different modes of transportation at all times.

Sometimes we take a scooter bus. Sometimes we take a, what are they called? Vans? No, scooter van. Sprinter van. Sprinter van. Oh. I was like, what's a scooter bus?

These sprinter vans can be really nice, actually. When they have a configuration, I'm like, oh, this is nice. We've taken a tour bus. We've taken planes. We've taken commercial planes. We've taken private planes. We've taken helicopter. Oh, no, we haven't taken a helicopter.

You missed out. We took a helicopter last weekend in New York City, and Rosebud almost climaxed. Although I did, too. I've got to say, you guys, that helicopter ride, flying into New York City at night in Manhattan, we got back at like, you know, midnight. Oh my God. And the moon was this beautiful orange burst.

And we were just flying into that city is like one of the most spectacular things ever. It's like flying into Paris. Yeah. That's incredible. Because it's so low enough that you can see all the streets and the movement and what's going on, you know, on all the avenues. And the city lit up at night with the moon. It it's so low enough that you can see all the streets and the movement and what's going on, you know, on all the avenues.

And the city lit up at night with the moon. It was just so beautiful. We were all just like, oh. That's super cool. I'd be too scared. Yeah. I think so, too, about a helicopter. I don't know.

Guess who was scared, Vanessa? Brandon. That's right. Brandon was scared. Me and Brandon get scared of the planes and flying things. Yeah. The heights. So Vanessa is from a family of three. She has two brothers, right? And she has a boyfriend who's adorable. And yeah, his name is Daniel. And she's based out of Austin.

So tell us a little bit about, because you were in LA and then you moved to Austin during the pandemic. And what's it been like to be in Austin during this time? It's different now. I feel like Austin is very much mini LA now. And it's changed so much. That's depressing. I know.

I know. It's huge. People are That's depressing. I know. I know. It's huge. People are moving here to do comedy now. Oh. It changed so much. Like, I was in L.A. 2018 to 2020. And just in those two years, Austin changed. And during the pandemic, when there was a pandemic, there was no pandemic, really, in Texas.

So shows kept going. Theaters were closing, opening clubs were closing, opening. And yeah, it's like the scene got bigger during a pandemic somehow. Yeah. I know a lot of people that moved either to Nashville or to Austin, like half of LA went just mostly to avoid taxes. Right. Isn them everyone's primary goal yeah we don't pay taxes here i'm just like that's her story i don't pay him but how do you i want you to talk a little bit about like you also just got voted austin's number one comedian of the year didn't you oh hell yeah which is great for this burgeoning comedy mecca you know this is this is becoming like the new comedy place next to L.A. or New York. Well, New York is probably number one, right?

I don't know. What's the number one? Yeah, probably. But yeah, I was voted through the Austin Chronicle. That caught me off guard. I didn't even know people knew that I was back here, but they know I have stalkers. And yeah, it's that that was really special because, you know, going to L.A. and making that jump and then coming back. And it was hard. It's been hard to kind of navigate. Like, am I, you know, still in the business, staying connected and all that after making such a big move and coming back home. So it's it meant a lot

that even moving back stuff still. Yeah, stuff is still happening for you. And she also has she has her own rider at the shows because I told Brandon, the person we're talking about, you know, I have a rider in mind, which is basically like a cheese board. And somehow a charcuterie board got on there, too. But I don't really eat that much meat anymore. So I told him to Ixnay the charcuterie board and then he just put it in Vanessa's room. So now she gets a charcuterie board. So this past weekend, the last weekend when we had Rosebud, Vanessa, Rosebud's like, holy shit, I can't believe you get a charcuterie board every single night.

She's like, I've got to put that in my rider. I'm like, listen, bitch, if you can fucking take this charcuterie board and stretch it out for over the next two years, because that's how long it will last. What a waste of meat. I know. They're huge. I know. But Vanessa likes her snack packs. She likes to travel with a little like, you know, those ladies at Dodger Stadium that come up with little trays of candy.

That's how Vanessa leaves every theater. She takes her tray, what's in her green room, and sometimes what's in my green room. And then we get on our little transportation bus. And depending on how long the ride is and how high I am at that point, we also share edibles because Vanessa has motion sickness. I don't, but I take them anyway for her. Yeah, for me. They always come in handy when we're super high after the show. There no food it's like yeah just have three packs of chips right just have them and if i ask her for chips she will sometimes be annoyed with me she will sometimes say how many are you gonna have and i mean this is the second bag and are you gonna reimburse me for these so she's pretty tough stuff to deal with. Well, because you're shitting on my snack bag the whole time.

I know. And then you're like, well, let me see what you got. Yeah. And then I'm a hypocrite. What's been some of your favorite places to go on tour? Like what have been the most surprising cities or your favorites? Well, we had so much fun in Kansas City. Those were great shows.

And just the fact that we were there for two nights, which is rare, we got to like really have fun. And yeah, it's the back to back shows is hard, but those are fun. Nashville was a blast. Yeah, Nashville was fun. Kansas City was fun because also we stayed in the same hotel for two nights, like she said, which is always just such a nice break. Like because you're always traveling and going either you leave right after the show or in the first thing in the morning.

And it's always exhausting no matter how you slice it. Yeah. But in Kansas City, we were there for two nights and I had one of these ridiculous hotel rooms that had about 18 different boardrooms in it. And we ordered late night food. My assistant Carla ordered us this huge spread. So we all went upstairs and ate after the show. Yeah, that was so fun. Our pizza party was great. Yeah, Nashville was fun. Anytime we have like an after party or we're able to have an after party after shows has been really fun. And she has friends. You have friends all around the country

that have been able to kind of come like San Jose, LA and different shows. New Orleans. Yeah. Her friends show up, which is always really fun because it's really nice to see your friends get to see you, you know, perform. I love that. Yeah. It has been just a nice way for me to visit all my friends while I work.

Yeah. And you get to like be like be fabulous and hilarious and they get to come see you. I was curious if there's anything unexpected that's happened on tour. Well, the wildest thing is when I forget, was it Salt Lake City or one show where two people, drunk people like stop the show. Oh, no. And I had never seen anything like that before. I mean, you know, I've had drunk audience members, but it's always like one. But this was very like two separate times. And that that was bizarre.

Yeah. Somebody approached the stage. They were obviously both really, really wasted. Yeah. And for some reason reason our security was not beefed up at that show that's exactly what the problem was and they this woman just came out they were both harmless but it was just like one was wasted talking about you know something and another guy was naked took his shirt off and came up he's like Chelsea I love you so much I'm

like well that's great but you're fucking interrupting everybody else's time right now. Right. Yeah. You handled them like a pro. Everything was fine. But I had never seen like people be like, this is my shot. I got it. I got to talk to her while she's mid sentence. Yeah.

It was wild. Don't do that. If you're listening, we don't like it. When I was at the L.A. show, we were upstairs in the mezzanine and there was a woman in front of me. I always get like a little scared of heights. On a mezzanine?

On a mezzanine. It's high. This woman who was not drunk, like I'm pretty sure she was stone cold sober or mostly sober. She came back in the middle of the show with a drink and she like lost her footing.

She was kind of in front of us, but she like slipped on a stair and like went like boom, boom, boom, boom, like down several stairs, which for me, just from the Heights perspective, was like, it's my worst fear. She did not spill her drink, which is why I think she was not super drunk.

But I like the term mostly sober and I'm going to start incorporating that into my repertoire. What I also would like to add is, and I'm going to start incorporating that into my repertoire what I also would like to add is I don't know if I said this on this podcast yet but there was a woman I forget which city we're in where they went to stand up and then just rolled down oh yeah they rolled down the center aisle so they were so wasted that they fell over and then started their person started rolling and And I was in the middle of it. And at this point, I think there were already had I think it might have been the same show

you were talking about. It definitely wasn't Salt Lake because that's a dry venue. So nobody could drink. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you're right. It was it was maybe Cedar Rapids or something. And I saw a person rolling down the aisle and I thought, am I going to draw attention to this right now or fucking finish my set?

Because if I draw attention to this woman that is rolling down the aisle, it's going to be mayhem. And then we're setting ourselves back 15 minutes and then, you know, and then we're embarrassing the shit out of her on top of it. And after rolling down an aisle, do you really need to be called out by the comedian you're there to see? It was me. I haven't told you but that that was me no I will say something that has also been surprising in a good way is like how awesome Chelsea's like audience have been towards me like super welcoming super warm great and you know it's intimidating like they don't know who I am or I don't, you know, they're just like, where's Chelsea? But they've,

they'll say my name, announce me and everyone's like, woo. I'm like, you didn't even know. Oh yeah. They love her. Yeah. They love you. They've been so great. And that's, that's been great. Well, Chelsea, you have such a track record of supporting other women, but also like picking really cool women to be around. You know, like there are so many people who, you know, maybe earlier on in your career you worked with who maybe you gave a hand to. But like now they're superstars. And, you know, I think you have a good track record of having a good picker. Thank you.

Well, I think it's pretty obvious to spot talent. Like, you know, when somebody is funny, all you want to do is make somebody make you laugh. If they make you laugh, you know, they're going to make a million other people laugh, too. So, I mean, Vanessa is easy to spot. That's very obvious talent. Oh, no, it's thank you. And I every every time I like people ask me, like, what's it like on tour? I'm just like, it's one fun to, it's just been so inspiring to be around you and the way you lift people up and me and I've opened for men and mostly men. And it doesn't feel like they want to support or, you know, root for you. Or even if you kill right before them, it feels weird. There's a vibe. I'm

like, oh no, they're upset. And with Chelsea, it's like, you know, she's there to high five me every time I get off stage and hug me. And it's just, I feel like it's helped me just become more confident and more just like a badass, a badass bitch. It's contagious. That's awesome. I love that. Well, that's good because we're roping you in to give advice too, because I feel like you'd be good at giving advice to strangers as well. And I was like, wait, why the fuck hasn't Vanessa been on this podcast? Yeah, I'm ready. Yes. Well, we have some very exciting ones for you today, but we're going to take a quick break and we'll be right back with Vanessa Gonzalez and Chelsea.

I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden. And together on the Really No Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like... Why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you.

And the one bringing back the woolly mammoth. Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Brian Cranston is with us today. How are you, too? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park.

Wayne Knight, welcome to Really, No Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really, No Really. Yeah, Really. No Really.

Go to reallynoreally.com. And register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason bobblehead. It's called Really No Really, and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC.

Amanda Mull, who writes our Business Week Buying Power column. Very few companies who go viral are like totally prepared for what that means. And Zoe Tillman, senior legal reporter. Courts are not supposed to decide elections. Courts are not really supposed to play a big role in choosing our elected leaders. It's for the voters to decide. Follow the Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. Good people, what's up? It's Questo, Questlove. And Team Supreme and I have been working hard to bring you some incredible episodes of Questlove Supreme

with guests you definitely don't want to miss. Now, one of the things I love about this Questlove Supreme podcast is we got something for everybody, every type of musical ever. We enjoy speaking to the people who were the face of some movements, some people you've seen on stage or TV or magazine covers, but we also love speaking to the folks who were making it happen behind the scenes

and they paved the way for those that followed. You know, keystones to the culture. This season, we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations, like I'm Pete Bill chatting up with hit maker Sam Holland, sugar Steve chatting

with the legend Nick Lowe, and I've had pleasures of doing one-on-one conversations with Willow, Sonata Matreya, Kathleen Hanna, and The RZA. These are conversations

you won't hear anywhere else. So make sure you go back and you check those episodes out, all right? Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Did you know that companies hire the most in the first two months of the year? Or that nearly half of workers are worried about being left behind? I am Andrew Seaman, LinkedIn's Editor-at-large for jobs and career development.

And my show, Get Hired, brings you all the information you need to, well, get hired. People are forming opinions of you even before you log into the Zoom or walk into the room. And so you really have to think about, what is it I want to display? You don't plant a garden and then just walk away and expect it to thrive. You are in there pulling out the weeds. You're pruning it. You're watering it. It and then just walk away and expect it to thrive. You are in there pulling out the weeds. You're pruning it. You're watering it. It's the same thing with your network. You should always be in there actively managing your network. If you don't feel confident to say a number, even admitting that to a recruiter is going to be far better than saying, well, what

is your budget for the role? A lot is in the follow-up, right? Don't wait to follow up. Whether you're a new grad, an established professional, or contemplating a career change, Get Hired is for you. Listen to Get Hired with Andrew Seaman on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you like to listen. Happy holidays from me, Michael Rapoport, and my gift to you is a free subscription to the I Am Rapoport Stereo Podcast, where I discuss entertainment, sports, politics, and anything and everything that catches my attention. I am here to call it as I see it, and there's a whole lot of things catching my eyes these days. Here's a clip from

one of my favorite episodes. You are not a real fighter. you will never be discussed anywhere in boxing history ever fake Paul the movie is The Apprentice and the movie is about young Donald Trump and his apprentice Roy Cohen real character obviously both are real characters it kind of has a Scarface vibe to it, which I thought was very interesting. Listen to the I Am Rap Report Stereo Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back with Vanessa Gonzalez and Catherine. Hi. Yay.

Well, our first question, and this is an email, comes from Heidi. Heidi says, Dear Chelsea, I'm 23 years old and I've been seriously considering getting my tubes tied. I have no desire to. Do it. Yes. You don't even have to finish the email. You're doing the world a favor. You're not contributing to mass population.

Well, there you go. Let's go. She says, I have no desire to birth a child, and I know I would like to foster children when I'm stable enough to do so. I'm still young, and this is a big decision. Am I too young to decide I never want to birth children? Should I wait until I'm older? If so, when is a good age? I have four years left on this IUD, so I can wait until it expires, but I like making decisions and acting on them.

What are your thoughts? I also considered donating my eggs first, but got denied for having too high of a BMI, so that really isn't an option for me. Thanks, Heidi. Too high of a body mass index? Which is really dated technology. But what is it? Does that mean you're too heavy? Yeah.

To give eggs? To donate? To donate? Yeah. Oh, God, they're picky, huh? Like, right. Who has the right to be picky? I would say good eggs. Yeah, I know. Good eggs are good eggs. 23 year old eggs are good eggs. I would say if you have what's her name? Heidi. Heidi, if you have an IUD in and you have a couple of years left on it, there's no reason to rush into getting your tubes tied. I mean, I know that is reversible. Is it reversible? So, yeah, I looked this up.

It is technically reversible, but the reversal doesn't always take. Yeah. Like, you don't need to jump into that. Like, I appreciate your I'm like that, too. I'm impulsive and I like to make decisions and get moving into the next thing and also cancel out possibilities that are not real possibilities in my mind, which would be having children. And I support that fully, but there's no reason to like expedite the process. Why don't you wait till your IUD is done and then get your tubes tied if you feel the same way? Yeah. Yeah. I think that's smart. I mean, I feel like I've always known also that I don't want to birth a child or be pregnant, but I feel the same way as her.

Like, yeah, maybe I'd like to foster kids or adopt later on. And that's always going to be open to you. So whenever you do it, it's I think, you know, when you know you don't want to go through being pregnant. Yeah, they should come up with a phrase for it. Like, you know how they say your clock is ticking, which is, you know, passe and old school, but like they should come up with a new phrase for how you know, when you know that you don't want to have a child. Yeah. Like I've never been on the fence about that. I've known in, you know, in my gut and my soul that that is not

what is meant for me. Yeah. I think, yeah, I think most people know. I feel like I knew early on. And then as I got older, I was like, oh, maybe, you know, everyone's telling you, you should have a baby. When are you going to have a baby? So then that fucks with you. But your heart always knows. I don't think it's for me. And now I'm 36 and I'm like, yeah, I don't want to do that. Yeah. Please, no. I would say if you're going to pick an age in the future, beyond just letting this run out. When I was younger and I was like, I never want kids, I never want kids. I had a couple of friends tell me, wait until you're 29. The second I turned 29, I had like raging hormones of like, I want a baby. But I also knew that I didn't actually.

So I got a dog and used my like mothering instincts that way. And it was perfect. But just wait until you're 30. If you don't get that by 29, I don't think you're going to get it. Yeah. If it costs a lot, yeah, go on a trip. Use it for something else for now. But Vanessa, I have a question for you. If Daniel really, really had his heart set on having a child, would you reconsider your stance? And I would say let's adopt or let's figure out where we can put your sperm because I don't want it. I don't want a person inside me with their whole body. No. And what particularly about so it sounds like it's more of a physical thing for you, though. Yeah. Like, what is it about it that turns you off so much? Somebody's

like living off of your food? Yeah, I don't like, I don't want to share. No, I I've always had really bad periods on my life, like super painful, and sickness and all. And I'm like, if this if it's bad now, I can't imagine what a pregnancy would do to my body and how awful I would be as a human. So I think everything in my heart and soul is just like, don't do that to us, please. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Heidi, do that to us, please. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Heidi, let us know what you decide. Yeah, Heidi, let us know what you decide and just take a minute. You're only 23 years old.

You don't even know your ass from your elbow yet. Yeah. Yeah. Also, Vanessa, I will say I always had really, really terrible periods as well. Well, still do. But was finally after like seven or eight years of investigating this and talking to doctors, finally someone was like, yes, you have endometriosis. That's what this is. That's what's going on. And they also were just like, if you're not trying to have a kid,

like we'll just keep you on birth control the entire time so you don't have your week off. So that might be something to investigate for you too. Oh, yes. I just went and they told me that as well. And I started a new birth control, but I didn't like it. So now I'm in the process of finding the one, which takes a while. You know what? You can also get done, Vanessa. I mean, I don't know if you can get this done in Texas because it seems like a lot of things are restricted there, but you can get an ablation, which is what my sister Simone got because she had really heavy periods. And so it basically blanches your uterus. They go in with hot water or the other option is I forget.

There's hot water. There's one way to do it. It's hot water. I'm actually scheduled to get one. I'm going to right after this podcast today to go see me on my OB. My period isn't that bad, but it would just be elective because I'd rather not have a period anymore. But for people who have really heavy periods, my sister Simone did it and it's called an ablation and you should ask your doctor about it because anybody who has endometriosis or

has a heavy period is a candidate for it. Wow. And is that for like when you are like ready to be done having periods or it basically well no you can basically stop so it just stops the bleeding you know so you don't you get the hormones it's to continue but you don't have the bleeding which goes with the cramping and with all of that stuff right so it just stops your period most 90 of women it stops their period altogether and then 10 of women your period is just much lighter for the rest of your life but it's something that a lot of women are doing because I've talked to a few people about it now. Yeah, I'll look into that. That sounds nice. And if Texas won't even let me torch my uterus, then I got to get out of here. I know. Well, yeah, they're in control of your uterus.

What I'll do is I'll videotape my doctor's appointment today with my OBGYN, and I will just, well, I'll live stream it, and then that way you'll have access to it. Yes. Fantastic. Thank you. Of course. Well, our next question comes from Mary. She says, Dear Chelsea, I'm newly recovered from a severe depressive episode

that lasted for over a year, primarily due to the passing of my dad in December 2020. He died from contracting COVID-19 while he was in the hospital for a separate injury. His death broke my heart, and once my shock wore off, I fell into a deep depression. I finally realized I needed professional help when I confessed to my mom I was having passive thoughts of suicide. I took a leave of absence from my job and focused only on my well-being. I began talk therapy sessions multiple times a week and saw a psychiatrist to manage my medications. I only did things that I wanted to do and practiced a lot of self-care during that time, and now I'm at a place where I have hope and excitement for the future again. I learned that my sensitivity isn't a weakness, nor is my capability to feel for others one.

That in fact, my intuition and ability to understand others is a gift. I also began to explore spirituality and started to meditate. I have since returned to my job, and while I'm so grateful for my coworkers and their support, I haven't been happy since I've been back. I feel a pulling to a new career, and I'm thinking about going back to school to be a counselor or therapist. Even my own therapist told me I would make a great one. However, I grew up in a low income household and the thought of increasing my debt by tens of thousands of dollars makes me ill. Chelsea, my question for you is, should I go back to school and take on thousands of dollars more debt for a career that doesn't quite pay out? Is there another way I could use my gifts that I'm not thinking of? Any suggestions are welcome. Mary. Hi, Mary. Hi, Mary. Hi, Kelsey. Hi, Vanessa.

Okay, so you're not into your job anymore. After everything you've been through, you're back and you're not feeling it? Yeah, pretty much. I was in a pretty dark, deep, severe depression for most of 2020 into 2021. And I took some time off of work, was able to really work on myself, do therapy, really just like get my prescription meds all set. And I came back to my job and like, I'm so thankful for my company and my coworkers. Everyone's been so great, but like, I just don't care anymore. And I, it's like, you know, I'm getting pressured because like our company only made like $8 billion last year instead of nine and all this other stuff happening in the world. And I really feel like I'm being called or like that I need to like do something more, but I don't know if that's just because I'm new out of depression and feeling great about life or, you know, what I really could do to move forward. Yeah, I would say,

first and foremost, I think your mental health is paramount to everything else that you're talking about, even your job and even debt. And I think that there are a lot of avenues to pursue, none that I actually know of and can speak to because I haven't gone back to school. But we have had this conversation with callers before. And there are so many ways to get financial aid, to receive grants, to get help with tuition. So first and foremost, you have to know like you don't have to be tens of thousands of dollars in debt. Like you don't have to equate that with an education. There are ways around that. Like would it be possible for you to start going to school while you're still working to kind of support yourself to a degree while you're figuring everything out? Is that a possibility? Yeah, that is a possibility. And like something I've worked or I've thought about, I think was

the like growing up with in a lower income family situation debt and like taking on more of it is like really scary to think about. So that's kind of what holds me back to be honest, but I think I'm supposed to just trust and not worry about the financial aspect, but that's just so hard when it's like, well, I grew up with no money and that did suck. So that's where I'm at. Yeah. That's hard. Especially you said you wanted to look into being a therapist or counselor now yeah yeah and i'm like i just watched this documentary of this woman who just puts out videos on youtube about like spirituality or whatever it turns out she's running a cult but yeah yeah that was intense you could just you know if that's your passion like giving people advice and helping people Yeah, that was intense. educated on YouTube like me. I wasn't even going to bring this up, but it's interesting, Vanessa,

that you say that because I actually had a tarot card reading last week and the reader kind of gave me the same message. She said that there are ways to reach people, even just like sharing your story. She's like, there's so many media outlets or like revenues to use. So you're kind of like confirming what she's already said. Yeah. Yeah. And I think if it is a social media thing, a YouTube thing, TikTok thing, I think that also connects you with people that can teach you and interview and all that stuff. Yeah, for sure. And so you said there is a way though, also that you could go to school while still working at your job, right? Yeah, I could.

I mean, I'm single. I don't have children. So, like, I do have the free time. School would be okay. I do take writing classes for fun because I like to be creative. And that's, you know, my outlet. So, like, I could take a break on the classes. There is a school that's really close by that I could go to in person. So, you know, that is an

option as far as viability. Yeah, I think you should pursue that. I think that like you came out of this depression in this really hard time and like you have to be in tune with yourself and in touch with what makes you happy and identifying that your workplace isn't bringing that joy for you anymore is major. Like so many people are in denial of their own feelings. So it's so important that you're in touch with yourself enough to know that. And just start by doing those switch out those writing classes for these counseling classes or pursuing something that equates to what you see yourself doing in the therapy or counseling world. And when you get far enough along, you know, if you're still working, you can supplement that you're not

going to go into huge debt. I understand fear of debt. I get that. I mean, I didn't grow up poor, but I didn't grow up with any extra money. You know, it was just kind of like, let's see what we have this week. But I get it. And I understand that it's a big fear. But like, don't let your fear drive your future. You know, your happiness is so important to you and what you can do with that and share with other people and light up other people is just, you just have to keep your eye on that prize. You know, you're going to be able to help other people and whether that's through YouTube or social media or whether you do it formally, it's never going to hurt for you to just get closer to your goals and learn more about, you know, what it is you want to achieve and then figure out how you're

going to implement all of that. Okay. Also like volunteering, you know, at, you know, women's shelters or things like that, that keeps you connecting with people, which seems like that's what you love. Yeah, I do. I love making that connection. That's sweet. That's so sweet of you. What a generous soul. Yeah. Oh, thank you. It wasn't always like that. I feel like I was like this when I was a child. I was super kind and sweet and loving.

And then, you know, life happens. And I, you know, went through the couple hard years. And, like, now I feel like I'm back. I almost feel like a child again. Like, I feel like, no, I want to connect to people. I want to show them, like, hey, we can be, we can do positive things. Like it can start with one person. So yeah, I do. I love it. I love connecting with people. So. And I think what Vanessa said too about volunteering with a group might give you a way to sort of dip your toe into

the water and see if sort of being surrounded by other people's, whether that's grief or other issues that they're going through is something that you do want to take on full time or whether that's something that is best, you know, as a volunteer position or that sort of thing. But also since you're a writer, you're probably going to be good at writing applications for grants and things like that, like Chelsea said. So yeah, one book I would recommend for you too is called What Color Is Your Parachute? There's a zillion editions, so they're always coming out with new editions. I believe they speak somewhat to how to pay for school, but it's mostly about career transitions. Figuring out where your skill set lies and what's right for you.

And do you really want to do that? Do you want to do something else? So that is a good recommendation for you. I'm going to read that. Yeah. Yeah. What color is your parachute? What color is your parachute? Okay, I'm going to look into that for you. I'm going to read that. Yeah. Yeah. What color is your parachute? What color is your parachute? I'm going to look into that for sure. I love reading.

Yeah. Oh, good. Well, you sound like an awesome person. So I'm so happy for you that you're in a better healthy place. Like the world is ahead. You have the whole world at your fingertips. Like look at it that way. I really do. Like I was at a spot where I just didn't want to live anymore. And I was like making plans to exit this life. And something made me just like, I actually reached to my mom and was like, I don't think this is normal. And so I got the help. And now I feel like I got almost like a second chance. I'm like, we can all do it. And being able to relate to other people that you've gone through that dark place is huge. It's huge.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that's what I would want to do. Like, that's what I really think is important, too, because, like, I thought I was still alone then. Like, when I was in that dark, deep depression, I listened to so many, like, audiobooks and, like, I just wanted to hear voices and, like, Chelsea, your podcast was one of them.

And, like, I don't know, just a thank you. Like, just having that, like, content out there was something that I was like, okay, just listen to Chelsea's book right now. And then you can make your next decision about life. So thank you. Right. And think about that. You can be that person to somebody else. You can be that. You can. Yeah. Yeah. No, I guess I can. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think finding, yeah, other people that have the same passion as you, community, and that's how you network and get to where you want to be. And remember, the most important thing in life is to know what your purpose is, right? To know what your passion is, what you care about the most, and you've discovered that. You're ahead of the game. Debt

is not going to be your issue. Right. Yeah. Thank you. I needed that reminder. Thank you guys all because it's just so hard to get that off of your shoulder or whatever. But you're right. When you know your purpose, you just got to go for it. Yeah. Well, Mary, thank you so much for calling in. Yeah. Keep us posted, Mary. Let us know what happens. Okay. And how you're progressing. Okay. I will. Thank you guys so much. It's so nice meeting everyone. You too. Oh, what a feel good call. That was great. Oh, that was so sweet. What a positive person. We need more people like that, you know? Yeah. We have had a lot of callers lately, though, Vanessa, that have wanted to become therapists, right? That has been a recurring

theme. Yeah. And we're very pro-therapy here. Well, obviously, we're trying to fucking be therapists ourselves. So we're not. I mean, that's where you attract like-minded people. Yes. Yeah. I'm Jason Alexander. And I'm Peter Tilden.

And together on the Really Know Really podcast, our mission is to get the true answers to life's baffling questions like why they refuse to make the bathroom door go all the way to the floor. We got the answer. Will space junk block your cell signal? The astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer. We talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth.

Plus, does Tom Cruise really do his own stunts? His stuntman reveals the answer. And you never know who's going to drop by. Mr. Brian Kranson is with us today. How are you, too? Hello, my friend. Wayne Knight about Jurassic Park. Wayne Knight, welcome to Really No Really, sir.

Bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really No Really. Yeah, really. No really.

Go to reallynoreally.com. And register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason Bobblehead. It's called Really, No Really, and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all.

Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Amanda Mull, who writes our Business Week Buying Power column. Very few companies who go viral are totally prepared for what that means. And Zoe Tillman, senior legal reporter.

Courts are not supposed to decide elections. Courts are not really supposed to play a big role in choosing our elected leaders. It's for the voters to decide. Follow the Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

or wherever you listen. Good people, what's up? It's Questo, Questlove. And Team Supreme and I have been working hard to bring you some incredible episodes of Questlove Supreme with guests you definitely

don't want to miss. Now, one of the things I love about this Questlove Supreme podcast is we got something for everybody, every type of musical ever. We enjoy speaking to the people who are the face of some movements and some people you've seen on stage or TV or magazine covers. But we also love speaking to the folks who are making it happen behind the scenes and they paved the way for those that followed you know keystones to the culture this

season we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations like i'm pete bill chatting up with hit maker sam holland sugar steve chatting with the legend nick low and i've had pleasures doing one-on-one conversations with willow sonata matreya kathleen hannah and the rizza these are conversations you won't hear anywhere else. So make sure you go back and you check those episodes out, all right? Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Did you know that companies hire the most in the first two months of the year? Or that nearly half of workers are worried about being left behind?

I am Andrew Seaman, LinkedIn's editor at large for jobs and career development. And my show Get Hired brings you all the information you need to, well, get hired. People are forming opinions of you even before you log into the Zoom or walk into the room. And so you really have to think about what is it I want to display. You don't plant a garden and then just walk away and expect it to thrive. You are in there pulling out the weeds. You're pruning it. You're watering it. It's the same thing with your network. You should always be in there actively managing your network. If you don't feel confident to say a number, even admitting that to a recruiter is going to be far better than saying, well, what is your budget for the role? A lot is in the follow-up, right? Don't wait to follow up.

Whether you're a new grad, an established professional, or contemplating a career change, Get Hired is for you. Listen to Get Hired with Andrew Seaman on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you like to listen. Happy holidays from me, Michael Rapoport, and my gift to you is a free subscription to the I Am Rapaport Stereo Podcast, where I discuss entertainment, sports, politics, and anything and everything that catches my attention. I am here to call it as I see it, and there's a whole lot of things catching my eyes these days.

Here's a clip from one of my favorite episodes you are not a real fighter you will never be discussed anywhere in boxing history ever fake paul the movie is the apprentice and the movie is about young donald trump and his apprentice roy cohen real character obviously both are real characters. It kind of has a Scarface vibe to it, which I thought was very interesting. Listen to the I Am Rap Report Stereo Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you get your podcasts. Well, our next email comes from Lane. She says, Dear Chelsea, I have a quote-unquote straight friend that I've always had a giant crush on.

In the friend group, I'm the only lesbian in the bunch, the other four being straight girls. Recently, my crush has been talking to the group, myself included, about how she doesn't see herself dating a man anytime soon and has been more interested in dating girls, which she's never done before. She asked if any of us know any good lesbian TV shows, so naturally I began word vomiting all the good shows and movies that I know. Since this conversation, she's texted me separately from the group to give me updates on the show I suggested, The L Word. This past weekend, the group went out to a pub crawl to celebrate my birthday. I got super drunk and basically hung out with my crush the entire time. A couple of my friends told me how obvious it is that we like each other. After we all left the bar, I decided,

fuck it. I'm going to tell her how I feel. So I texted her. Basically, she responded by telling me, I'm not saying I'm not interested, but perhaps a rain check for the future if the timing is right, because currently I don't want to date anyone. My question is, how do I tell if she, or anyone really, likes me? I really put myself out there and got a pretty neutral response. I'm not sure if I should read it as she's just letting me down easily or truly just doesn't know how she feels and isn't ready to date a girl. Thanks for your help, Lane. Okay, Lane, first of all, that is good. That feedback was good. I feel like there's hope in that situation. Right, Vanessa? Do you feel that? Oh, yeah. It's whatever that pause or,

you know, rain check she offered. That's her shit. And maybe, yeah, maybe she's not ready. Maybe she wants to be single. Maybe she likes you so much that she sees you as, oh yeah, if we get together, it's gonna be a thing. And maybe she just wants to play around for now. But I think for sure, if the whole group sees that y'all are vibing, there's a vibe. Yeah, there's a vibe.

And keep in mind, she's brand new to this. Like she's not ready to get down to business, maybe. You know, let's get down, let's get, she's not ready to get down to business, maybe, you know? Let's get down, let's get down to business. Let's get down to business. That's our favorite song because we're forced to listen to it day in and day out. But keep in mind, first of all, what you did is bold and cool. Like, that is cool that you reached out to her, not in a gross way. You didn't attack her or, you know, in a bathroom while you were drunk.

You did it respectfully over text after you guys left each other, which is the most respectful way you can ever approach someone. She gave you her answer, so completely respect it and let, you know, let the chips fall where they may. Maybe she'll come back. I bet you she will. I bet you down the road she's going to come back

because like Vanessa said, if the whole group saw it, it's happening and not everybody was wrong and there's a flirtation going. But, you know, you'll know when someone likes you when they respond in kind. Don't get waylaid by someone's lack of response or lack of initiative. Don't. That was good what you did. That's good to let people know how you feel and give them the opportunity to reciprocate. You know, it doesn't matter if you get rejected. And I don't even consider that

as a rejection. But it doesn't matter. It just matters that you're honest about your feelings, and you're never gross or too forward about it. But yes, I think that's good practice. And to continue putting your feelings out there when you have them for somebody with this experience, you already did it. Let's see what happens. But I do not take that as a rejection. Yeah, I think it's so refreshing. You know, I think people that are dating all my single friends, they play that game where you have to hide how you feel about the other person until they figure it out. And it's all codes. And it's like, just say, I like you. Do you like me? No. Yes. Let's move on. You know? Yeah. And that's how I knew the whole time I dated. It was I would always tell guys, I like you. And then they would play

that game of like, I like you too. But, you know, and I finally knew my boyfriend liked me when he made moves to like, hang out with me, see me again, talk to me more. And I'm like, oh, I guess this is what it is when someone likes you. They make an effort. Yeah. Yeah. And you're not wrangling them all the time, right? Like when you get somebody, it's worth all of the frogs to get to the prince. It is. Yeah. So just count. And if you have to think of it in your head, like, OK, here, I'm putting myself out one more time, putting myself out there in order to get to the real person. You could think of it like that because then it's like almost a means to an end, you know? Yeah.

And the hottest energy is like, cool, not right now. Sounds good. And then you go do your own thing. It's the hottest. Meatiness is the least hot thing. So if you're just like, cool, and then you just like go buzz off, she's going to be crawling back. Oh, yeah. Yes. Oh, yeah. Yes.

Oh, yeah. And it's, yeah, I think it's different when there's a friendship established. You don't want to be like, okay, we're dating. It's going to, she's going to come around for sure. And she knows you're around. So keep that in mind too. She knows you're around. You guys are part of a big group.

So. Well, keep us posted, Lane. Yeah. Well, our next email comes from carly carly is in her 20s dear chelsea my cousin is like my sister in april of 2022 my now husband and i eloped in his hometown of los angeles california his family is not as close as ours and i was unsure if anyone from his side of the family would even attend. It made me so sad to think of our wedding with only my side of the family, so instead we kept it simple and eloped in a beautiful garden, live streaming it for family and friends to watch from afar. On the day, my cousin was working and I knew not everyone would

be able to watch it live, but she didn't even text me congratulations, despite being in family group chats where everyone else was chiming in. She quote-unquote liked one of my texts that day, and that was it. Time went by, and I was already so hurt by the lack of acknowledgement on my big day. I was half expecting her to get us a gift off our registry to make up for it, but she never did. I get it, it wasn't a traditional wedding, and she's never been a gift giver, but it was a milestone in my life that was important to me, and I feel like she just doesn't seem to realize that or care. It's not about the gift, but the gesture, and it makes me want to not get her anything on her wedding day, even though I would never actually go through with that. Do I bring it up and risk losing someone I've considered a

sister and a role model for 27 years, or sweep it under the rug and live with it? Carly. Vanessa, do you want to start that one? Yeah, I feel like if you're sisters, cousins, and if you're bringing up to your close friend, best friend, whatever this relationship is, that something they're doing was upsetting to you, if that's going to risk the whole relationship. I don't think that's a strong relationship. I feel very secure in my close friends, with my family. If they did something, I can say, hey, that hurt my feelings, but I'm not worried that this is going to end our relationship. It's just going to be a conversation that we work through because right now you're just assuming

what she's thinking. Is she mad at you? Is she not? And you're trying to figure it out when you can just ask, hey, I was expecting a little more on my big day and it was kind of hurtful what what was going on yeah I think that's true and I think you should definitely say something because it really is meaningful to you I mean I don't think you should have expectations about somebody getting you a gift or anything like that but it's about her presence and her acknowledgement of that day and she may have just thought that since you guys were eloping and live streaming it that it was like you were playing it down and it wasn't as important as as is to you. So she may have misread the signs and misread the circumstances. So give her the opportunity to explain that. And I think

when you come from a place of hurt and you're just like, listen, you're somebody I've looked up to for 20 plus years that I've considered a sister. I did want you there with me on that day, maybe not physically in person, but maybe I wasn't clear. Like I want you there with me on that day, maybe not physically in person, but maybe I wasn't clear. Like I want you there in support of, you know, this is the biggest moment in my life or one of the biggest moments for sure. So I don't think anything you could say would be wrong as long as you're not attacking her and, you know, you're just coming from a place of love and like hurt. And I will say, I looked up the wedding etiquette rules on this. And really, I mean, it's not required if someone elopes, it's not required to buy a gift according to etiquette rules. But you know what you said

here about like, it's a milestone in my life. I think just like Chelsea said, that's the language to use. Like this was hurtful that like maybe you could have sent a card. But the other thing is like your cousin was probably just wrapped up in her own shit that day or that. Yeah. You know, we all are like doing our own thing stuff and we're just taking everything personal. For sure. Everybody's taking everything way more personally during this time. That's for sure. Right. Yeah.

And it's all just been a little weird. You know, we haven't been able to go to weddings or funerals or get togethers or Fourth of July or any of that stuff. Well, Carly, let us know how it goes. Yeah. Good luck, Carly, let us know how it goes. Yeah, good luck, Carly. Let us know. Well, our next email comes from Thomas.

Thomas says, Dear Chelsea, I'm a non-binary queer person. I recently came to a decision with my ex to rekindle our relationship. We were together for two years and have been separated for a little over three years now. My partner is a therapist and is possibly the most amazing human being

I have ever met. He makes me smile, laugh, and feel like I can fully be myself around him. We haven't made it official at all that we're monogamous, but are letting things progress naturally. Recently, we went out together and I experienced a few instances where he was approached by guys

that fit a specific mold of conventionality in regards to looks, muscles, tall, etc. I'm sort of insecure because I don't have motivation to hit the gym regularly and be that type of person. I don't think I'm less than. I just find it hard not to compare myself to these people that my partner finds attractive. My question to you is, how do I combat the urge to doubt myself and own my attributes with my partner so I can become a better partner for him? Thomas. Oh, good question, Thomas. That's very common.

So many people feel that way. And I think you have to, like you just said, so many beautiful things about your partner. They're with you for a reason. You know, he loves you for the reason that he loves you. Like the compare and contrast game never results in any positive, good feelings about yourself. Comparing yourself to what you think your boyfriend or partner likes or what he said he likes doesn't matter because he's chosen to be with you.

And you need to focus on that and remember that, you know, I'm sure you're interested in other people that you're not with also physically that you're attracted to those people. That doesn't mean that you want to be with them. So you have to remember that your place is with your person. And, you know, unless they give you a real substantial reason to feel like they're not into you, then those feelings and misgivings are just in your head. And you just have to exercise

that ability to deprogram yourself of that thinking. You have to always just say, this is in my head, this is not real, I'm with him and we're together, we're a couple. And eventually that won't matter to you, him looking around or you looking at what he finds attractive. He has the ability to go off and be with another person if he wants to.

Yeah, I feel like at the beginning of my relationship, because it was my first real relationship, I was so jealous, so insecure. And I thought that, you know, because he thought other things or people were attractive, that meant something about me. But it took a while to learn. It means that has nothing to do with who you love, who you're attracted to. Yeah, I'm also attracted to, you know, The Rock and J-Lo and all that. So, but yeah, it's hard when I would always be hard on myself, like, why am I so insecure? Why can't, why am I so jealous? And it is because, you know, shitty guys before would lie to me and tell me no when shit was happening and all that.

So there's a reason why we're insecure and past relationships and all that. But once you find someone that's actually with you, choosing you makes you happy. You kind of have to, like Chelsea said, deprogram yourself, find a way to find that love within yourself. And that's what being in a relationship has taught me is I thought, oh, having a boyfriend's going to make me feel so great and be confident. But I actually had to start working on myself because he didn't fix all my shit like I thought he was. Yeah, exactly. And that's work that you have to do. That's yeah, that's an inside job, not an outside job. So you have to figure that out. But as long as you

know that you identify the issue, it's easy to fix the issue, you know? I mean, it's easier said than done. But as long as you're being honest with yourself and understand like, okay, this is an issue. This is not real. This is what's in my head and have a dialogue. And remember, like the thoughts you're having, you're aware of those thoughts you're having. And so you're aware of reminding yourself that these aren't real thoughts. If that makes sense. Yeah, it should. If anyone who's listening to this podcast, it should make sense to them. Well, let's take a quick break and we'll be right back with Vanessa and Chelsea. your cell signal the astronaut who almost drowned during a spacewalk gives us the answer we talk with the scientist who figured out if your dog truly loves you and the one bringing back the woolly mammoth plus does tom cruise really do his own stunts his stuntman reveals the answer

and you never know who's going to drop by mr brian cranson is with us how are you hello my friend wayne knight about jurassic park wayne knight welcome to Really No Really, sir. Bless you all. Hello, Newman. And you never know when Howie Mandel might just stop by to talk about judging. Really? That's the opening? Really No Really. Yeah, really. No really.

Go to reallynoreally.com. And register to win $500, a guest spot on our podcast, or a limited edition signed Jason Bobblehead. It's called Really No Really, and you can find it on the iHeartRadio app, on Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff

is I think embarrassing to the SEC. Amanda Mull, who writes our Business Week buying power column. Very few companies who go viral are like totally prepared for what that means. And Zoe Tillman, senior legal reporter. Courts are not supposed to decide elections. Courts are not really supposed to play a big role in choosing our elected leaders. It's for the voters to decide. Follow the Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio

app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. Good people. What's up? It's Questo, Questlove. And Team Supreme and I have been working hard to bring you some incredible episodes of Questlove Supreme with guests you definitely don't want to miss. Now, one of the things I love about this Questlove Supreme podcast is we got something for everybody, every type of musical ever. We enjoy speaking to the people who are the face of some movements, some people you've seen on

stage or TV or magazine covers, but we also love speaking to the folks who were making it happen behind the scenes and they paved the way for those that followed. You know, keystones to the culture. This season, we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations, like I'm Pete Bill

chatting up with hitmaker Sam Holland, sugar Steve chatting with the legend Nick Lowe, and I've had pleasures of doing one-on-one conversations with Willow Thank you. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio show, Get Hired, brings you all the information you need to, well, get hired. People are forming opinions of you even before you log into the Zoom or walk into the room. And so you really have to think about what is it I want to display? You don't plant a garden and then just walk away and expect it to thrive. You are in there pulling out the weeds. You're pruning it. You're watering it.

It's the same thing with your network. You should always be in there pulling out the weeds. You're pruning it. You're watering it. It's the same thing with your network. You should always be in there actively managing your network. If you don't feel confident to say a number, even admitting that to a recruiter is going to be far better than saying, well, what is your budget for the role? A lot is in the follow-up, right? Don't wait to follow up. Whether you're a new grad, an established professional, or contemplating a career change, Get Hired is for you. Listen to Get Hired with Andrew Seaman on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you like to listen.

Happy holidays from me, Michael Rapoport, and my gift to you is a free subscription to the I Am Rapoport Stereo Podcast, where I discuss entertainment, sports, politics, and anything and everything that catches my attention. I am here to call it as I see it, and there's a whole lot of things catching my eyes these days. Here's a clip from one of my favorite episodes. You are not a real fighter. You will never be discussed anywhere in boxing history, ever. Fake Paul. fighter you will never be discussed anywhere in boxing history ever fake paul the movie is the apprentice and the movie is about young donald trump and his apprentice roy cohen real character

obviously both are real characters it kind of has a scarface vibe to it which i thought was very interesting listen to the i am rap report stereo Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you get your podcasts. And we're back. Well, Vanessa, we like to ask if our guests have any advice they'd like to get from Chelsea. Is there anything you'd like to ask? Yeah, you know, I was thinking about it and I know when we're on the road, I ask you for advice. You give me a lot of helpful tips, but I know you're a dog owner. I'm a dog owner. Is there a good song

to sing to your dogs to put them to sleep? Do you have one? Do you not sing to your dogs? Don't accuse me of anything, Vanessa. And you know I don't fucking sing to my dogs. No, that's not true. I sing It's a Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood to them all the time, but not to put them to sleep. I sing, I make up lots of songs, but I sing It's a Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood,

a beautiful day in the neighborhood, would you be mine? And then I suck on Bert's nose. Could you be mine? That's a good one. Yeah, that is a good one. It's sweet. And also, if you're like me and you can't sing, which I'm sure you don't have that problem

because you're Latina and you have rhythm and can sing. You should have seen Vanessa trying to teach me to do a TikTok dance once. She was like, what is wrong with you? I'm like, I told you I don't have any rhythm. She's like, no, seriously, like just move your arm. Like I'm showing you.

It was like this simple. And I was like, what? I like head butted myself. But yeah, I think that's always a soothing song. Whenever I hear that song,

I always just melt. I like that. I'm going to try that one. I always sing hopelessly devoted to my dog. Oh, that's cute. cute and sexual so there you go oh that's lovely yeah well we want to thank you vanessa for being on the podcast today

please follow vanessa vanessa comedy vanessa g what is it vanessa g vanessa g comedy vanessa gynecological i'm van Vanessa's gynecologist first of all you are yeah I'm her pharmacologist and her gynecologist although she doesn't always believe that I'm a gynecologist but it's Vanessa G comedy comedy on Instagram yeah and vanessacomedy.com website and yeah you could find me on tour with Chelsea. We're going to keep this party going all year. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Thank you, Vanessa. Thank y'all. That was fun. Have a great day. You too. And if you'd like to get advice from Chelsea and one of her guests, please write in to dearchelsearoject at gmail.com. in the museum of failure and does your dog truly love you we have the answer go to really no really dot com and register to win 500 a guest spot on our podcast or a limited edition sign jason bobblehead the really no really podcast follow us on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever

you get your podcasts welcome to decisions decisions the podcast where boundaries are pushed and conversations get candid join your favorite hosts hosts, me, Weezy WTF. And me, Mandy B. As we dive deep into the world of non-traditional relationships and explore the often taboo topics surrounding dating, sex, and love. That's right. Every Monday and Wednesday, we both invite you to unlearn the outdated narratives

dictated by traditional patriarchal norms. With a blend of humor, vulnerability, and authenticity, we share our personal journeys navigating our 30s, tackling the complexities of modern relationships, and engage in thought-provoking discussions that challenge societal expectations. From groundbreaking interviews with diverse guests to relatable stories that'll resonate with your experiences,

Decisions Decisions is gonna be your go-to source for the open dialogue about what it truly means to love and connect in today's world. Get ready to reshape your understanding of relationships and embrace the freedom of authentic connections. Tune in and join in the conversation. Listen to Decisions Decisions on the Black Effect Podcast Network, iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg Podcasts,

to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. People, my people, what's up? This is Questlove.

Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season, but, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season, but, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie,

Johnny Marr, E, Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more. Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You gotta check them out.

Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Happy holidays from me, Michael Rapaport, and my gift to you is a free subscription to the I Am Rapaportort Stereo Podcast where I discuss entertainment, sports, politics, and anything and everything that catches my attention. I am here to call it as I see it and there's a whole lot of things catching my eyes these days. Listen to the I Am Rappaport Stereo Podcast on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, and wherever you get your podcasts.