Dear Chelsea - Minisode: Dating Your Friend’s Ex with Aminah Imani, Sydnee Washington, and Marie Faustin

Episode Date: December 27, 2024

Comedians and besties Aminah, Sydnee and Marie join Chelsea to discuss venmo etiquette, how much drama is too much drama, whether it’s ever okay to date your friend’s ex.  * Check out Sydnee and Marie on the Mess Podcast.   * Thanks to LoungeStudiosNYC.com * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brad Dickert * * * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome back to Couples Counseling with Chelsea, and I'm here with three of my friends. They are not a couple. They're a throuple. They're not romantically involved either. There are three comedians named Amina Amani, Sydney Washington, and Marie Faustin, and I spent some time with them in Whistler and heard a lot about their beef, so I thought I would bring them onto the podcast. What are your thoughts, ladies, on dating somebody's ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend how do

you feel about that oh we don't do that i don't like anybody that my friends like not one bit no thank you i don't even like the people that i used to like so why would i like your trash yeah so a hundred percent i agree with like i'm not even interested i feel like even if somebody looks their way or i'm like oh no that's off the uh options for me but i feel like even if somebody looks their way or I'm like, oh, no, that's off the options for me. But I feel like as I'm getting older, I see a lot of women friends. And it's just like, oh, well, you're married now. You moved on. Why can't I date your ex?

Y'all don't see that or y'all not together no more or that. We were friends after y'all were together. So that don't have anything to do with me. Well, me and Sydney were talking about this woman woman her friend had went through chemo and passed away and when her friend died she was like oh the way that her husband was treating her in the hospital i noticed that and now she's now she's with the husband the ex they married yeah to me that's crazy like that's crazy enjoy your love but to me i just that's to me that's weird so what y'all are y'all talking about her y'all y'all y'all

reminiscing okay but this isn't some additional info that might change your mind she's 77 does that make a difference 77 oh yeah yeah well yes how old is the guy well probably around that 80 but that's what i'm saying i feel like as you get older the rules change well that's what it How old is the guy? Probably around that. 80. But that's what I'm saying. I feel like as you get older, the rules change. That's what it seems like. No, that's weird. That's weird.

You guys have been friends for so long. You've seen so many times. And then you saw me when I had cancer, babe. Now you want my man? That's weird. That felt like you've been plotting the whole time. That means she was showing up to the cancer treatment with like a good cat eye and the jeans that made her butt look good and she was like oh let me brush your three hairs across your forehead yeah maybe the man is her heirloom you know listen she was gonna take her shirt he left him in the way i mean you, you're wild. He was in the will, Sid. Yeah. Up for grabs. I'm glad.

All I know is I'm glad I'm gay. And so we never have to worry about that with the girls over here because, you know, they're very straight. But I feel like even being friends with exes, I don't really play that. Like, that's my boundary, too. Oh, yeah. I just feel like if I met this person from my friend and they are no longer connected. I fucking hate that shit. You're right. I hate when people continue friendships with people that I

cancel. That is disgusting to me. That is just like ridiculous. Also I go in now with friends that have exes and I go in with like just now once this is a wrap this is a wrap. But also when they don't even know the person that well they met them one time at a dinner that you had for everybody. And now they circling back. And they're hanging out and I'm like wait that was

I just nixed her like after six years and you don't even. And now they're circling back. And they're hanging out. And I'm like, wait, that was, I just nixed her. Like after six years and you don't even know her and you're hanging out with her. You continue, like I have this one guy, every, my friend's boyfriend, every time I hook up

with someone on vacation, he stays in contact with the guy that I hook up with on vacation. I'm like, why? Why are you remaining in contact with these one night stands that I've had?

That's a pet peeve. Don't do that. It doesn't make any sense to me at all. But it's people out there that's like that. They will stay connected. They'll be hanging out. They'll be inviting them to the group chat, coming to the events. And you just be sitting there like, do you think I want to see this person again?

If I say bye, you got to say bye. Well, I'll say that I feel like i'm the opposite of your friend chelsea once my friend is done with somebody that person is dead to me and sydney can attest to this because sydney got exes that i was like well they i don't we were done with them and then sydney still talks to them and i'm like i thought we said that they died so i whole funeral for that person. Girl, the resurrection. It's ether. You know what I'm saying? We're not bringing it back.

She is good for that. She keep everybody around. I know. That is hard. That is hard when you bitch about somebody and then we all and your friends all back you up and are like, fine, fuck her or fuck him. And then that person gets back together with the person. You're like, wait a second.

I'm the only one that's mad at them anymore. But I don't really bitch. I don't bitch about them. If anything, I put it on B. I'd're like, wait a second. I'm the only one that's mad at them anymore. But I don't really bitch. I don't bitch about them. If anything, I put it on beat. I'd be like, oh, I messed up. I wasn't right. I wasn't all the way there for the person. That's why this didn't work out.

Okay, what are your thoughts on lending friends money? Woo! I don't do money and friends. You don't? No. I mean, like, I'll get you a meal. I'll send you a little Uber ride or something, a little bag or a shirt. Like, if I could give it to you and just let you have it, 100% it's yours.

But if I can't, I'm not a bank. I'm not a lender. Like, I got good credit. If I need a loan, Chase, BOA, it's a whole lot of lists of people that I can contact I just I think it's embarrassing too I just I don't I feel like I wouldn't even I've never asked y'all to borrow money we've been friends for probably a decade I've never asked them to borrow money no no I probably stolen money I've stolen money from y'all oh from from the need yeah I'm like it's mine no I'm like listen if you forgot it's mine

no I'm like how no I'm just saying that's how I am with my friends like I'll take it but I recently had a friend

hit me up with a voice memo asking me for $175,000 oh thousand dollars $175,000 on the

on the memo that's the butt that's why they didn't text it because they said you're not screenshotting this voice memo exactly as soon as i listen to it you know it disappears right i was like oh that's why you sent it in a voice memo told me that she would have it back to me at the end of two months which is even more sketch than just asking for it you Yeah, if you don't have $175,000 now, you're not going to have it in two months. But I have a long history of loaning people money and them never paying it back.

But loaning them without the expectation, you know, when people are in trouble. But this was the first time in my adult life that I was like, absolutely not. That's ridiculous. What's the most you've ever lent somebody? Like 20 grand. Right.

Well, let me go ahead and add you to the group chat. Yeah. I mean, but for me, I think that, I mean, I've had a long history

of just like being bad with finances, but then I've also met people who have been bad with finances and it's just like, you put it, you put it in the zeitgeist,

you know, if somebody, if you can do it and you can and it helps them and then they eventually, you know, if somebody, if you can do it and you can, and it helps them and then they eventually, you know, pay it back. That's amazing. But like, you know, what is, what is money if it's on right terms? I mean, obviously there's people who are sketchy and they're, they're out, they're using you and they're not coming from a good place. But if somebody was down and out and like, I it I had abundance of it I'm like oh yeah

this is my good friend but if it's on the terms where like they say they're going to pay it back and then they don't then it's like I hope you know that twenty thousand dollars is worth our friendship because then I now I can't mess with you no more because you're not on your word yeah and I've definitely when I was coming up and had no money, I definitely borrowed from a lot of people. And I always paid people back because I was very, I always knew, like Marie, that I would be successful and I would do well. But for some reason, I found the $175,000, just such a staggering sum to ask someone for. That's more than most American salaries. Like, what? what yeah and this

is also someone I haven't seen in several years you know I mean coming through on a voice memo I was several years I mean yeah we text sometimes but we're not like close and I just I just couldn't get over it and I was I actually realized the difference between me now first of all my business managers would never allow that no anymore because they know my history of being too generous to people without asking enough questions. So they would actually make someone sign a contract or something, but you know. Oh, that's good. A contract. Yeah. I offered her that up. I said, if you want to go through my business managers, you're going to have to do some paperwork with them. And then immediately she's like, I'm offended by that. Oh, but you're not offended by your request.

I don't believe in money and friends. What did she need the money for? Was she starting like a lash business? I mean, it's all very shady. It's all. It's shady. It just felt shady right away. I was like, this isn't right. This isn't how you ask for that either.

No, you haven't heard from her in a while. Did she hit you with a preliminary, hey, friend? Did she text you to kind of massage it in there? No, no. She was brutally honest. 2025 is bound to be a fascinating year. It's going to be filled with money challenges and opportunities. I'm Joel. Oh, and I am Matt.

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secrets that are kept from us, the secrets we keep from others, and the secrets we keep from ourselves. Listen to season 11 of Family Secrets on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Good people, what's up? It's Questo, Questlove. And Team Supreme and I have been working hard to bring you some incredible episodes of Questlove Supreme with guests you definitely don't want to miss. Now, one of the things I love about this Questlove Supreme podcast is we got something for everybody, every type of musical ever. We enjoy speaking to the people who are the face of some movements, some people you've seen on stage or TV or magazine covers,

but we also love speaking to the folks who were making it happen behind the scenes, and they paved the way for those that followed. You know, keystones to the culture. This season, we've had some amazing one-on-one conversations, like I'm Pete Peel chatting up with hitmaker Sam Holland, Sugar Steve chatting with the legend Nick Lowe, and I've had pleasures of doing one-on-one conversations with Willow, Sonata Matreya, Kathleen Hanna, and The RZA.

These are conversations you won't hear anywhere else, so make sure you go back and you check those episodes out, all right? Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I have a question about drama because I'm sure there's lots of drama between the three of you. How much drama is too much drama? And when do you have to draw the line with the level of drama? Let me tell you what Sydney and Amina drama is.

We go out. We're having a nice time. We all look great sydney will say something about amina something amina will say something back about sydney something and then they just start roasting each other and everyone's laughing or no no they're laughing at each other everyone else is like oh why are why? Are they about to fight? Are they fight? Right. And it's just like, to me, it just feel like low blow after low blow after low blow. And I just listen and laugh.

But because I, yeah, I'm too sensitive for that. And I'm. Marie, you're too sensitive? If someone said something about me the way that y'all talk about each other I I'm too sensitive for that that's when I'll be brutally honest I can't y'all y'all are like y'all will say things and I'm like oh oh oh she's like she's a mother and Amina's like she's unhoused and I'm like oh my god like we do go low and I thought it was cool until one day she called me and she was like this week I can't do this back and forth with you Amita and I was like

first of all I was honest of all you started every time and now you know I do not Amita to put out a little message liar it's like 60 40 sydney i think it is it's a hundred percent like for the most part i'm chilling i'm vibing and then here goes sydney saying something that now i gotta i gotta pull out my guns every week is different but i do remember she hit you up and said i can't do this with you this week and then i want to say the next time i saw y'all together she started it no she started it and then i said I thought we was off this week. And I took like a little few less blows than she did.

What do you think it is between the chemistry between you two? Because I've seen you guys do it and it is shocking. You know, I mean, especially for people who are around you who aren't comedians, they must be like,

what the fuck is happening? Damn, Amina, we got to slow down. No, I don't know in my family I'm not gonna lie that's up that's a love language of ours like dragging each other like anything that I'm excited or happy about like with my sisters I'll come I'll send them a picture and like they'll congratulate but like underneath it'll be a whole tagging of like what I'm wearing what my hair where I was at who I was with so it's just in my family that's just that's kind of like a love language thing that we just go back and forth dragging

each other just I mean keep you humble keep I keep Sidney humble I'd like to say one thing I come first of all first of all I have a low iron count I'll be I'll be low most of the time Amina stays coming in on a foul. So her energy, you already be on defense because you're like, well, what's she about to say? And then, you know, she do her Kathleen and something about that.

Be like, oh my God, let me put the pause up because I know she about to say something. I'm not going to lie though. It keeps me sharp. I will say that. That's why I think I, I think that's why I like doing it

because it's like, I know soon we're going to come through with the left hook and now I gotta come back. So yeah, I guess we in the gym. We in the gym, sis. Yeah, it's just a gym. It's a workout. It's an open mic against, like, I guess our emotions or I don't know what it is

that we do, but I look at Amina as a sister and whenever we're doing it, I think I rarely be like, damn, you took it too far, like, once in a while. She did take it too far one time remember when you were standing over me asking me to pay you a Venmo I wanted to punch you in your face because I was like

girl it ain't never a day I'm not going to send you your money back and she was like pull your phone out and send it to me now and I was like are you serious right now so you took it too far with that. You were having a hard day friend you too was having a hard time I was but you took it too far with that were having a hard day, friend. I was, but you took it too far with that. Because, sis, you don't have no problem

demo requesting somebody for $5. So there's that. And you've done that. And do. I don't know. I am very particular about money. That's why I don't do friends with money. And then also, if we go out and it's $33.60, please do not send me $33. Honestly, you

on my list for that. $33.60. Please do not send me $33. Honestly, you on my list for that. $33.60. You want the $60? Would you round it down? You need to round up. You need to round up. You need to round up to $175,000. Yeah.

That's exactly right. And that's all for this week with Amina, Sydney, and Marie. You can find them on Instagram at JustSydBW, that's Sydney's, at Reezy, that's with three E's, R-E-E-E-Z-Y, and then at Amina Imani. If you want some good Instagram stuff, go follow them.

And you can join us next time as we continue Couples Counseling with Chelsea.