Dear Chelsea - Minisode: Ditching a Date with Chelsea + Catherine

Episode Date: May 8, 2026

Chelsea and Catherine get a followup from a disgruntled wife and take exclusively one-drink questions.  * Need some advice from Chelsea? Email us at [e-mail] * Executive Producer Catherine Law Edited & Engineered by Brad Dickert * * * The views and opinions expressed are solely those of the Podcast author, or individuals participating in the Podcast, and do not represent the opinions of iHeartMedia or its employees.  This Podcast should not be used as medical advice, mental health advice, mental health counseling or therapy, or as imparting any health care recommendations at all.  Individuals are advised to seek independent medical, counseling advice and/or therapy from a competent health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issues, health inquiry or matter, including matters discussed on this Podcast. Guests and listeners should not rely on matters discussed in the Podcast and shall not act or shall refrain from acting based on information contained in the Podcast without first seeking independent medical advice.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Guaranteed Human. Another podcast from some SNL, late-night comedy guy, not quite. Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends. Me and hilarious guests from Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer, Streeter Seidel, help an a cappella band with their between songs banter. Where does your group perform?

We do some retirement homes. Those people are starving for banter. Listen to humor me with Robert. It's Michael and friends on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine an Olympics where doping is not only legal, but encouraged. It's the enhanced games. Some call it grotesque. Others say it's unleashing human potential.

Either way, the podcast's Superhuman documented it all, embedded in the games and with the athletes for a full year. Within probably 10 days, I'd put on 10 pounds. I was having trouble stopping the muscle growth. Listen to Superhuman on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. My mother-in-law spent years sabotaging our relationship until Karma made her pay for it. All right, Sophia, tell me about how we started this story. She moved in for two weeks, lasted five days, left a mess, and then pressed her ear against their bedroom door and burst in screaming. When kicked out to a hotel, she called her son-in-law's workplace, pretending his partner had been rushed to the hospital by ambulance.

She faked a medical emergency? And spoiler, that was just the beginning. To find out how it ends, listen to the OK Storytime podcast on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, this is Robert from the Stuff to Blow Your Mind podcast. Joe and I are both lifelong Star Wars fan, so we're celebrating May the 4th with a brand new week of fun, thought-provoking Star Wars-related episodes. Join us as we tackle science and culture topics from a galaxy far far away, such as the biology of tauntons and wampas on the ice planet hot, or the practicality and corporately. business sense of the Sith rule of two. Listen to Stuff to Bole Your Mind on the Iheart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your

podcasts. Okay, for the High and Mighty Tour, people, we are rocking and rolling. These are the shows we have coming up. May 15th, I will be in Saratoga. May 16th, Monterey. May 17th, Modesto. I will be in Port Chester on June 4th. And we added two new dates to the High and Mighty Tour on June 3rd.

I am coming to Saratoga Springs, New York. So pre-sale has begun for that. And then on June 28th, I am coming to Nantucket, and pre-sale has started on that. June 5th, I will be in Boston, Massachusetts. June 12th, I will be in Portland, Oregon. And June 13th, I will be in Seattle, Washington. June 27th is going to be Hyannis, Massachusetts.

August 6th is Red Bank, New Jersey. August 7th, I'm coming home to Montclair, New Jersey. August 15th is Calgary, Alberta. Canada. September 18th, Santa Barbara. September 19th, San Diego. September 25th, I will be at the beacon in New York City. September 26th, I will be in Philadelphia. September 27th, New Haven, Connecticut. October 2nd, Atlanta, Georgia, October 3rd, Baltimore, Maryland, October 4th, Saginaw, Michigan, October 9th, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, October 10th, Toronto, Canada. October 16th, I'm coming to Boise, Idaho. October 17th, Spokane.

Washington, November 7th, I will be in San Francisco, and November 13th, Salt Lake City, November 20th, Austin, November 21st, Houston, Texas, November 22nd, Irving, Texas. December 5th, I am adding a second show in Denver, for those of you who couldn't get tickets to the first one. And on December 6th, I will be coming to Vancouver, Canada. Okay, those are all my dates for the high and mighty door. Go to Chelseahandler.com for tickets. Hi, how are you, Catherine?

Oh, hi, Chelsea. Hi. I'm great. I actually just got back from a nice little trip to Mexico with two of my girlfriends that I go on every year. Oh, that's nice. Yes, good. Very, very toasty and warm down there. That's nice to feel arrested after a vacation.

Yeah, yeah. And it's nice to have, like, something to look forward to every year where it's like, this is where we go. Well, I have a follow-up. This is Charlotte who called in on our Judy Greer episode a while back. So she was frustrated because her wife was the breadwinner, but it had had like, a job change and had gotten fired from her job a couple of times. They have a little kid. And you had recommendations like do a gratitude journal and like change your attitudes, start looking positively. And she was like in a tough spot with her marriage. So she says, hi, Chelsea. I wanted to send a

quick follow up. Not long after our call, something pretty amazing happened. About three weeks after we talked, my wife got an awesome new job. And then a week after that, I was promoted at my job. Oh my gosh. I know. Now I'm actually up for another promotion. And I have my first appointment with a fertility doctor this week to get busy having a second kid. I'm not sure exactly how to explain it, but there really is something powerful about reminding yourself every day what you're grateful for. Taking a moment to focus on that seems to shift your mindset in a really positive way, and that's been pretty incredible to see how things have started falling into place since then. Thank you so much. You're really helping people in a time like now. We all really need it.

Thank you so much, Chelsea, and see you in Port Chester, Charlotte. Oh, cute. I love that. Yeah, that's nice. Yeah. So glad to hear things are going well. It's nice. Yeah, and also to frame it in that way that it shifts your mindset, like that it's true. It's like you can't really put your finger on what's different, but it does make you. Right. I like the other thing that I heard recently, which is not to when you have a feeling to have the opposite. You know, like there's an opposite feeling to every feeling.

Choose that one when you have a bad feeling. Right. Yeah, yeah. And focus on the positive. It's very serious. Many so today. It's very serious. We just recorded with Monell, which was not serious at all.

It was not serious at all. And like, I have a contact high, so I know you're doing amazing. Earlier that day. Should we smoke this joint? Yeah, why not? You don't mind my lipstick, do you? I'll give you your own. You already started without me.

No, I had. And this is from yesterday. I was, I'm so glad that you're the guest today because I was like, I haven't sat and smoked a joint in my new podcast room for a podcast guest in a while. most people are sober these days. Have you noticed this? Boring. Why do you think that is such a thing?

They went too hard. They did the wrong shit, and they got burnt out real easier real quick. Yeah, but I know people that have gone too hard, and then they're able to reel it back in. Everybody can't reel it back in. You have a good cocktail, too? I like this.

I'm having a cocktail. I'm having a little old Tom gin, which is my new favorite thing. That's going too far right there. That's one right there. I have to be able to read later. so I can't smoke. I can't fuck with that gin, girl.

You need to see my act, you know what. Well, that's what we were talking about before. I feel like a lot of people went too hard with gin in college or whatever, and they just, like, they got sick on it once and they can't stand it. No, I got sick on it multiple times. Oh, no. Do you like that, Chelsea, the vodka lemonade that you're drinking? Could be stronger, but yeah, it's okay.

It could be stronger. It's a day drink. But I like that. Oh, is that what it is? Yeah, it's kind of like a light drink so that you can have a couple. Have you tried the Willie Nelson? I want to. Don't you? Is it a drink?

Yeah, it's like this, but I think it's got weed in it. Oh, yeah, yeah, probably. No, I haven't tried to yet, but I love anything that he does. His weed is strong. I heard Snoop said that's the only person who outsmoked him was Willie Nelson. I smoked weed with Willie Nelson. Yeah, in his trailer. Oh, yeah.

And that's where to do it. And it was, I was high the next day when I got up. It's like with Willie Nelson. Yeah, there was two times where I've gotten, So high that the next morning, I was still high. When are you performing at Netflix as a joke, Lonell? May 9th. The 9th at the Ice House.

And then I think I'm doing something with Shack and Burke Crusher. Okay, so you can get tickets at Netflixasajokefest.com. Mm-hmm. Make sure to check out Lunel's full episode on May 21st to hear the whole conversation. Hey, I'm Tori Webster, and I host That Digital Take. If you've ever wondered how the internet really works, from influencer culture to digital marketing and pop culture, this is your inside look.

Each week, I share what's actually working online, the behind the scenes of building a career as a creator, and real conversations with people shaping the industry. Think of it like your big sister guide to the digital world. Follow that digital take on IHeart Radio or wherever you get your podcasts. Another podcast from some SNL late night comedy guide, not quite.

Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends, me and hilarious guests from Jim Gaffigan to Bob Odenkirk, David Letterman help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and headwriters, Streeter Seidel, help an Acapella band with their between songs banter. The worst singer in the group? The worst?

Yeah. Me. Is there anything to the idea that because you're from Harvard, you only got in because your parents made a huge donation. The group. The yard birds, right? That's the name. The Harvard yard, but they're open.

Do you have a name suggestion? We're open. since you guys are middle-aged. One erection. Listen to humor me with Robert Smygel and Friends on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Humor me.

I need some jokes to make me seem funny. Imagine an Olympics where doping is not only legal, but encouraged. It's the enhanced games. Some call it grotesque. Others say it's unleashing human potential. Either way, the podcast's Superhuman documented it all, embedded in the games and with the athletes for a full year. Within probably 10 days, I'd put on 10 pounds. I was having trouble stopping the muscle growth.

Listen to Superhuman on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. My mother-in-law spent years sabotaging our relationship until karma made her pay for it. Wait a minute, Dakota. How bad did it get? Well, it got bad enough that her son-in-law had to eventually arrest her himself. She moved in for two weeks, lasted for five. She left nail clippings in the bathtub, candy stuck to the furniture, and then she pressed her ear against the bedroom door and burst in screaming. She did not burst in while they were.

She did. They kicked her out and paid for her hotel, and they thought, it's finally over. Days later, she called her son-in-law at work, claiming that his partner had been in some kind of freak accident and had been rushed to the hospital in an ambulance. He called every hospital in the city, and his partner was making... coffee the entire time. She faked a medical emergency just to test whether or not he loved her son? Yeah.

And she sat in the hospital parking lot waiting for him to see if he would show up. When that didn't work, she walked into the son-in-law's police station and filed a kidnapping report against him. She filed a kidnapping report against him in his own police station. And spoilers, karma's going to show up in the best way possible. So if you want to hear how this story ends, search OK Storytime on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you're listening. to podcasts.

And now back to our minisode. Okay. So we have a one drink question today, and it is actually sponsored by Vital Proteins. They just launched their new collagen sparkling waters. Oh, that's what's in my new fridge. Yeah. In three crisp, refreshing flavors, people, strawberry blossom, lemon, lime, and blood orange. Vital Proteins, collagen sparkling water improves your skin health in as little as 30 days

when sip daily. It helps reduce fine lines and wrinkles, boosts skin elasticity, and supports healthy skin, hair and nails. Vital proteins collagen sparkling water has zero grams added sugar and no artificial sweeteners and provides 100% daily dose of vitamin C, which supports collagen production, immune support, and glowy skin. Each can contains 2.5 grams of varisol collagen peptides. Clinically shown to improve skin health in as little as four weeks. Sip your way to better skin health. All right. So here's our featured question. It's our one drink question and she says, dear Chelsea. I've been a weekly listener of your podcast for the last few years. I love your

humor and your commitment to destigmatizing mental health and therapy. Since you're a total badass in the gym, I have a health and fitness question for you. I'm a working mom in my late 30s. I love to work out, but my time is limited during the week and I can only squeeze in 20 to 30 minutes in the morning. I'm consistent, working out every day, but I've hit a plateau. How can I maximize my Monday through Friday 30-minute workouts to still build my strength and see change? What's the ideal balance of strength versus cardio versus recovery. I feel like since I don't work out very long each day, I'm hesitant to take rest and recovery days.

I have free weights, a stationary bike, and a treadmill. Cheers, Caitlin. Hi, Caitlin. I love these kinds of questions. It's so ridiculous. But I will say that I would just wait train. If I had 30 minutes every day, I would wait train. Or you can sprint every few days on the treadmill

because that's really good for, like, fat burning and also like it's good to have some cardio. But I don't do cardio on the regular. Cardio's like data. It's out. No, yeah, it's out of style. And I do do it just sometimes like if I want, you know, need to sweat. Like, I'll do it.

But I don't do a lot of cardio anymore. I used to be obsessed with it and I used to be much less lean. Well, that's the thing. It's like in the 90s and 2000s, they were like, oh, yeah, cardio, cardio, and then we realized like, oh, it's actually not doing much for, especially for women. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I wasted so many hours of my life running after nothing. Yeah.

Your cardio is going to come from, like, chasing your kids, going on walks with them, I'm running right at the park. Walking is really good for you, but that's just doing naturally. Yeah, for sure. Okay, thanks again to our sponsor for this week's wondering question, vital proteins. You can pick up a case of their new collagen, sparkling waters, and strawberry blossom, lemon, lime, and blood orange. Out now. So this is a podcast about video games.

Kind of. It's also about friendship. Definitely. And chaos. Unavoidably. Welcome to It's Dangerous to Go Alone. A podcast where we talk games, culture, nostalgia, and immediately go off topic. There is no gatekeeping.

There is no skill check. If you win a game on easy mode, we support you. If you've never touched a controller, honestly, same energy for some of us. It's fun, it's chaotic, it's friendship with a loose gaming theme. And somehow we keep getting away with it. You should listen. Stream it's dangerous to go alone on the free IHeartRadio app. Or wherever you get your podcasts.

Another podcast from some SNL late night comedy guide, not quite. Unhumor me with Robert Smigel and Friends. Me and hilarious guests from Jim Gaffigan to Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman, help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and headwriter, Streeter Seidel, help an Acapella band with their between songs banter. There's the worst singer in the group? The worst?

Yeah. Me. Is there anything to the idea that because you're from Harvard, you only got in because your parents made a huge donation. The group. The yard birds, right? That's the name. The Harvard Yard.

But they're open. Do you have a name suggestion? We're open. Since you guys are middle aged. One erection Listen to humor me with Robert Smygel and Friends On the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Humor me

I need some jokes to make me seem funny Imagine an Olympics where doping is not only legal but encouraged. It's the enhanced games. Some call it grotesque. Others say it's unleashing human potential. Either way, the podcast's superhuman. documented it all, embedded in the games and with the athletes for a full year. Within probably 10 days, I'd put on 10 pounds.

I was having trouble stopping the muscle growth. Listen to Superhuman on the I-Hard Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. My mother-in-law spent years sabotaging our relationship until karma made her pay for it. Wait a minute, Dakota. How bad did it get? Well, it got bad enough that her son-in-law had to eventually arrest her himself. Oh. She moved in for two weeks, lasted for five.

She left nail clippings in the bathtub, candy stuck to the furniture, and then she pressed her ear against the bedroom door and burst in screaming. She did not burst in while they were. She did. They kicked her out and paid for her hotel, and they thought, it's finally over. Days later, she called her son-in-law at work, claiming that his partner had been in some kind of freak accident

and had been rushed to the hospital in an ambulance. He called every hospital in the city, and his partner was making coffee the entire time. She faked a medical emergency just to test whether or not, he loved her son? Yeah. And she sat in the hospital parking lot waiting for him to see if he would show up.

When that didn't work, she walked into the son-in-law's police station and filed a kidnapping report against him. She filed a kidnapping report against him in his own police station. And spoilers, karma's going to show up in the best way possible. So if you want to hear how this story ends, search OK story time on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you're listening to podcasts. Well, we have a couple more really quick questions.

The first one is from Kendra. She says, Dear Chelsea, I was supposed to meet a date at a bar, but left after he was 20 minutes late, no text, no show. An hour later, he said his phone had died and apologized profusely. Should I give him another chance? It was a third date, Kendra. Third date, first time that happened? Yeah, I would give him another try. Maybe his phone did die.

I know, but I'm a little bit like, he... My phone dies. Yeah. Okay. All right, so speaking from personal experience, you need another chance. I mean, not a lot, but it's happened when I'm supposed to, yeah. And I feel like if he's out already, he doesn't get a chance to charge his phones. That's why maybe it was hour.

Yeah, you can't just pick up with him for that. Yeah. Okay. All right, Kendrick, give him another chance. So our last question today comes from Lucy. She says, I'm writing in because I recently lost my best friend to a dude. She's always been someone who gets her sense of worth from male attention. She'll date a guy and morph into them, adopt their interests, humor and lifestyle. And yeah, we all sink into our partners to a point, but her current boyfriend has become her whole

world while I've completely dropped out of it. We used to talk every day, share everything, but now I barely hear from her. If I'm being honest, I don't even miss her, mainly because the her she has become isn't the one I knew. But I can't throw it all away. She is my person. It's not her fault that she fawns to men, but how do I get her to see it? Side note, the dude and I are perfectly friendly, but Jesus fuck, please.

don't leave us alone together. Zero vibe. It's like we both forget that we know how to speak, Lucy. Brutal. Yeah. So how do we get her like vibing with her friend again? I don't know that you can, well, no, not while the guy's in the picture. And if she's acting like that with guys, I don't know. I think people have to outgrow that stuff. I don't know how you remind telling someone you don't like their boyfriend is unhelpful information most often. Yeah. Well, and I wonder, like, is there a way to say, like, I feel like I'm missing you just as you are without this guy. Yeah, that's a good, yeah, that's a nice way to just, I mean, I don't know how you could say that wrong.

Yeah. Right. Like, I think that's a text of like, it's a nice way to say it. Yeah, like, I'd love to go to coffee. Like, let's get some coffee. I want to spend some time just with you. And then when you're a coffee or dinner or whatever, you can address and just be like, hey, like, I really want some more like, I miss you, like a lone time with you.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I support that. All right, Lucy. Problem solved. And we're on for today.

Oh, wonderful. Okay, goodbye. Okay, bye. Goodbye. I'm going upstairs. If you want advice from Chelsea, write in to Dear Chelsea Podcast at gmail.com. Dear Chelsea is a production of iHeartMedia. Follow Chelsea on all socials at Chelsea Handler and find Catherine on TikTok at Flashcadabra.

Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by Brandon Dickert, executive producer Catherine Law. Find full video episodes and minisodes now on Netflix and get tickets to see Chelsea Live at Chelseahandler.com. Another podcast from some SNL late night comedy guy, not quite. Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends. Me and hilarious guests from Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer Streeter Seidel.

Help an a cappella band with their between songs banter. Where does your group perform? We do some retirement homes. Those people are starving for banter. Listen to humor me with Robert Smiglin. Michael and friends on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Imagine an Olympics where doping is not only legal, but encouraged. It's the enhanced games.

Some call it grotesque. Others say it's unleashing human potential. Either way, the podcast's Superhuman documented it all, embedded in the games and with the athletes for a full year. Within probably 10 days, I'd put on 10 pounds. I was having trouble stopping the muscle growth. Listen to Superhuman on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. My mother-in-law spent years sabotaging our relationship until Karma made her pay for it.

All right, Sophia, tell me about how we started this story. She moved in for two weeks, lasted five days, left a mess, and then pressed her ear against their bedroom door and burst in screaming. When kicked out to a hotel, she called her son-in-law's workplace, pretending his partner had been rushed to the hospital by ambulance. She faked a medical emergency? And spoiler, that was just the beginning. To find out how it ends, listen to the OK Storytime podcast on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, this is Robert from the Stuff to Blow Your Mind podcast. Joe and I are both lifelong Star Wars fan, so we're celebrating May the 4th with a brand new week of fun, thought-provoking Star Wars-related episodes.

Join us as we tackle science and culture topics from a galaxy far, far away, such as the biology of tauntons and wampas on the ice planet hot, or the practicality and corporately. business sense of the Sith rule of two. Listen to Stuff to Bole Your Mind on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.