Dear Hank & John - 19: Should I Abandon My Stuffed Animal?

Episode Date: October 12, 2015

Should I watch YouTube ads? How do I make friends with my old neighbors? What do I do when my daughter won't sleep because she's always on the internet? When is it worth arguing on the internet? Will ...climate change mess with forecasts?If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello, welcome to Dear Hank and John. Nor is I prefer to think that Dear John and Hank. It's a podcast where of me, Hank, and my brother, John, tell you stuff about ourselves, answer your questions, give you Dubu's advice, and bring you all the week's news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon. How you doing, John? I'm doing really well. You might remember that last week, I expressed concern that the sort of post-tailer swift Indianapolis weather might be fading. Taylor Swift came to town several weeks ago and brought with her the most beautiful weather
Starting point is 00:00:37 the city of Indianapolis has ever seen. But somehow her memory, it looms large and we've had yet another astonishingly beautiful, beautiful early fall week. I'm writing every day outside, walking down to the White River and sitting in a chair down by the White River and writing my new story and it just, it couldn't be better. That sounds lovely. How are you? I'm good. I'm busy.
Starting point is 00:01:03 NerdCon, as of the recording of this podcast, is several days away. By the time it goes online, it will have happened. And so I can't tell you how it went, but maybe I will say something about that on Twitter or on my Snapchat. Hank, GRI on Snapchat. I mean, the hardest working Snapchat promo game
Starting point is 00:01:22 in the world. So I'm literally about to get on a plane to go to Minneapolis. I was working all night on Wizard's School Kickstarter stuff, not all night, but a lot. And then in my off time, I've been listening to podcasts, reading books, and watching the Americans. Have you seen this? Show, John? Oh, have I seen that show? In fact, the reason you're watching it is because I have recommended it to you.
Starting point is 00:01:47 That's not true. I first started watching, because Michael Gardner and Colin recommended it to me. They kept talking about it in the office and I was like, that still looks like fun. And I can't do it with it. What do you think of it? It's great.
Starting point is 00:01:59 Oh, it's so great. It's so great. Oh, that show is good television programming. It is candy for people of my generation. Totally. You know, they give me the cars of my childhood. They give me the two great empires battling each other in quiet and secret of my childhood. Everything that was great and terrible about my childhood is contained inside that show.
Starting point is 00:02:25 And also, it is the best television program I have ever seen about marriage, about real people being actually married. It is such a good marriage show. Yeah, well, it's remarkably good. Yeah. John, you know, I remember asking mom once when I was like six, saying, when did the Cold War end? And mom being like, oh no, honey, that's still happening. Yeah, no, the Cold War lasted until, you know, until I was about 12 years old with the fall of the Berlin Wall,
Starting point is 00:02:59 although in some ways, I mean, you could argue that the Cold War continues. I mean, we continue to have these proxy wars between the United States and Russia. We had them, you know, in the 80s and Afghanistan, and then here we are 30 years later, you know, having to heavily armed groups, heavily funded by the United States
Starting point is 00:03:20 and Russia fighting in Syria. So, yeah, I don't know. We still seem to not get along that well with Russia, despite all of our best attempts. Indeed. John, do you have a short poem for us? I do. Okay.
Starting point is 00:03:33 How great is the Americans? I mean, it might be the best show I've ever seen on TV. Oh, that's, right, but we can move on though, right? I guess. Why don't we have an American's recap podcast? Can't believe it. All right. I would need to get cable.
Starting point is 00:03:52 Today's short poem is called Discoveries in Arizona by James Wright. It has one of those little notes from the author before the poem. Hank, I don't know if you know those notes, but the note is, all my life so far, I have been afraid of cactus, spiders, rattlesnakes. The tall 14 year old boy who led me through the desert whispered, come over it this way.
Starting point is 00:04:15 Picking my steps carefully over an earth strangely familiar, I found four small holes, large enough for a root that might have been torn out, or a black snakehole in Ohio that I hated. What is it I said some cute prairie dog or an abandoned post-hole maybe? No, he said. She's down there with her children. She doesn't hate you. She's not afraid.
Starting point is 00:04:38 She's probably asleep. She's probably keeping warm with something I don't know about. And all I know is sometimes in sunlight, two brown legs reach out. It is hard to get a look at her face. Even in the museum she turns away. I don't know where she's looking. I have lived all my life in terror of a tarantula, and yet I have never even seen a tarantula turn her face away from me.
Starting point is 00:05:02 That's all right, said the boy. Maybe she's never seen you either. Discovery's an Arizona by James Wright. Bit of a longer short poem for today Hank, but I thought you might like it because it's got some nature in it. I know that you're pro nature. You're right, I did like it.
Starting point is 00:05:17 It gave me goosebumps. Oh, wow, it's a massive victory. Well, if you thought that was exciting, wait till the news from AFC Wimbledon. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Well, if you thought that was exciting, wait till the news from AFC Wimbledon. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Well, before we do that, we have about 40 minutes of talking about people's problems. How does that sound?
Starting point is 00:05:34 Yes, but it will be cut down to 20. Um, all right, this question comes from Maddie. She writes, Dear John and Hank, I am wondering about YouTube ads. Do I have to watch the whole thing for the creator to benefit? Also, if I'm watching an ad for a product
Starting point is 00:05:47 or company I don't support, but a channel that I do want to support, what should I do? Would it even make a difference if I skip the ad? Great question, Maddie, and one near and dear to our hearts as YouTube creators. How did you know? I know a ridiculous amount about this topic,
Starting point is 00:06:03 and no one knows how much of an ad on YouTube you need to watch before the creator gets paid. That is a secret that no one knows the answer to. But if you skip it immediately, the creator does not get paid. If you watch an advertisement for a product that you dislike or a service or a political candidate that you do not like,
Starting point is 00:06:26 that isn't good for the service, or the candidate, or whatever, that's actually only good for the creator, and it's actually kind of bad for the product, or service, because they're paying to have you look at that, and it is not affecting you in the way that they would like to affect you. So, if, right, so just sit through those awful terrifying, don't actually do that.
Starting point is 00:06:49 No, because advertising is a terrible way to support creators. And it's, that is not the reason you should be watching ads. Yeah. My response here would be to value your time. And, uh, yes. And if that means watching an ad because you're interested in it and it seems like a good use of your time, then that's fine. If it doesn't, you shouldn't feel a responsibility to watch an advertisement to support a YouTube creator, because in my opinion, at least, it's just an incredibly inefficient way to support the YouTube creator.
Starting point is 00:07:18 I would probably be better off with you sending me a dollar every six months. Oh, no. Then with you watching, you would be better off with them sending you a dollar every three years. Right. I would be better off, I'm really bad at math, Maddie, I apologize. I would be better off with you sending me one dollar every three years than with you watching an ad on every single video that I make.
Starting point is 00:07:42 So save that dollar, save your time of not watching ads, maybe do some work, try to get five minutes of work at Starbucks or something, and then send me that dollar. Yeah, I mean, this is something that Hank and I kind of worried and thought a lot about because it used to be that most of our income came from or a lot of our income came from ads. But we've found that it's just such an inefficient way to support YouTube creators.
Starting point is 00:08:13 And it ultimately like, it introduces, you know, someone into the conversation who I don't really want to be in the conversation. And so we've found other ways to make a living and now all the ad revenue from blogbrothers just goes to support educational projects into the charity, the foundation to decrease world sucks. So, but even then, I don't think it's quote unquote worth it to your time to watch an ad unless you want to. So, if you want to support a YouTube creator, buy their things, buy a shirt, buy a poster buy a book, buy a, that's the way to do it, and you get a thing.
Starting point is 00:08:47 So that's good. We've got another question. This one is from Paulina, who says, here's one for the dubious advice. It's probably, she meant to say, dear Hank and John, here's one for the dubious advice. Do you think it's okay for a college age or otherwise adult person to sleep with a stuffed animal?
Starting point is 00:09:04 Ah, she's got a catapult to sleep with a stuffed animal. I just got a cat to a loved bear, named Long Nose, and here's the important part. I still feel like I have to have him with me, but I don't want anyone to see him and be creeped out or think I'm immature or something. Do you have any dubious advice? I'm gonna be totally honest with you, Polyna. From where I sit in my chair right now
Starting point is 00:09:27 as a 35 year old man podcasting, I could reach out and touch my childhood sleep animal Dexter the Blackfooted Farrot. So I'm gonna be a yes on this one. I am also a yes. Also I'm a huge fan of Dexter the Blackfooted Farrot. I remember the Christmas that he came into our lives and he just, I do too, yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:45 He became part of our family. It was really, you know, my mom, my dad, my brother, our terrible dog, Red Green, myself, and Dexter, the Blackfooted Ferret. And yeah, I mean, I guess I would say that anybody, anybody who judges you for whatever thing you do to find comfort and warmth in this world that isn't illegal and doesn't hurt anybody, that says more about them than it says about you.
Starting point is 00:10:15 Yeah, I think being an adult is whatever you want it to be, and a lot of it is being confident in being able to make those kinds of decisions and do the kinds of things that aren't things that people would expect or that seem like adult things to do. And that's like one of the greatest parts of being an adult and having that confidence and security is difficult to come by. But you should try and embrace it when you can get it. And I will say that the thing that you are find,
Starting point is 00:10:42 the object that you are finding enjoyable and that might be bringing you comfort or security or whatever is a lot less silly than some of the other objects that people enjoy that bring them security and happen to cost tens of or hundreds of thousands of dollars. So Hank, we've got another question. This one is from a proper adult who writes, dear John and Hank, I would like your advice
Starting point is 00:11:04 on my 17 year old daughter. She wakes at three or four in the afternoon, reaches for the internet and remains on it until three or four the following morning. She neglects her studies, spends her time watching you to the point where she knows the ornaments on your shelf. Advice, question mark, yours, concerned London father.
Starting point is 00:11:22 Well, concerned London father, I appreciate that you are concerned in this situation and I think that your concern is real and legitimate but I want to begin by asking you a question, a question that is very important to me, which is, are you going to the AFC Wimbledon game this Saturday because you're in London, you have every opportunity to do so
Starting point is 00:11:42 and let me also encourage you to bring your daughter to that game because it's a wonderful way to bond, and the thrill of fourth-tier English football will make it absolutely impossible for her to look at her phone. So that's where I think we should start. Oh, man. Yeah, I mean, you first start at the point
Starting point is 00:12:03 of believing that the thing that the person you love is into is legitimate and then work back from there and worry about not what they are spending their time doing, but what they are not spending their time doing. So if this question had said, my daughter's having a hard time sleeping and is neglecting her studies.
Starting point is 00:12:26 That is the exact same thing I'm reading here. What she's doing instead of that is like, I assume either something that she very much enjoys or something that, or that she has just like a, you know, she's in a funk, she's in a bad place and she needs to, you know, she needs support and she needs love in a difficult time in her life. I agree, but I think that the real key here is to make sure that you get to King's Meadow on Saturday afternoon at 3 p.m. Oh, man. You know, John, I'm glad that I'm not and never was a teenage girl.
Starting point is 00:13:05 It sounds like hard work. Well, I don't recall being a teenage boy being particularly easy. No, agreed, agreed. But I think that it in the end might be easier. Oh, yeah, I mean, it, well, there's no question that in general, you know, there are all kinds of structural privileges
Starting point is 00:13:24 for men, but I greatly disliked being a teenager, or I guess I wouldn't say I simply disliked. I just found it tremendously difficult and stressful and scary and overwhelming, and I had no idea what I was doing. There's a great line from a sociologist, I think his name is Clifford Geertz, but I apologize if it's not. Anyway, he wrote, the difference between dogs and people is that dogs know how to be dogs. And when I was 16 more than anything else,
Starting point is 00:13:53 I felt that I was a person who had no idea how to be a person. I feel you. I still don't really know how to be a person. I basically just do whatever comes across my plate. That is exactly the same approach to life that dogs take. Alright, I did it, John. I figured out how to be a person. Alright, we got another question.
Starting point is 00:14:18 This one is from Stephanie. I hope that was helpful, concerned London father. I feel a little bit like we belittled your position, but, you know. No, I'm not trying to belittle the position at all. I would just say that like the concerns are real. The concern of, you know, neglecting your studies, feeling disengaged from your family and your life. Like those are big problems, not sleeping enough.
Starting point is 00:14:41 That's a big problem. The problem I would argue though is not the internet. I don't think the internet is causing those problems. So I think the key is just going to be to try to find a way to engage with your daughter, like for instance, taking her to the book. Okay, this question. I'm not backing down off my advice, because I feel rare cases where my advice is excellent. Well, everybody else who's listening in London, you gotta get yourself out to the pitch and watch the game. Not only that Hank, but you can join the Don's Trust
Starting point is 00:15:15 and become an owner of AFC Wimbledon for like, if you are a student for like 20 bucks, for like 15 pounds. All right, anyway, today's podcast is brought to you by AFC Whibbleden, AFC Whibbleden, the greatest football club in the history of the world. It's also the solution to all your problems. Today's podcast is brought to you by Dexter,
Starting point is 00:15:35 the Black-footed Ferret, a representative of a severely imperiled group of individuals that I'm sure was purchased by my in viral crazy dad in some way that was supportive of that in-bred group of individuals who were decimated, but have come back despite the fact that their entire food supply of prairie dogs was killed by farmers. And of course today's podcast was brought to you
Starting point is 00:16:01 by Hank's freaking Snapchat. Hank, G-R-E, on Snapchat. The future of social media. There's a lot of my dog. You'll see a lot of my dog. Oh, boy, Hank, let's have another question. This one comes from Stephanie, who writes, Dear John and Hank, a few months ago,
Starting point is 00:16:16 my boyfriend and I moved into a house together in a very quiet village. We're both 20-something, and all our neighbors are 50-plus. We've met them a few times in passing, and they seem very friendly, but I worry that they consider us to be inherently unlikable, or that they disapprove of us living in a primarily retired area, when we are in our prime as it were.
Starting point is 00:16:32 I'll try not to take that personally, Stephanie. Have you got any advice for becoming better friends with your neighbors, particularly with older neighbors, who may disapprove of you without any real reason? Oh, well, you don't know for sure that they disapprove of you, Stephanie. That's the first thing that I'd say. Like, it's possible that you feel this generation gap, that they don't feel, and that like some of the awkwardness
Starting point is 00:16:53 just comes from you thinking of them as like other, which of course they are, because they've been alive more than twice as long as you have. But I think like the thing that breaks down that gap to me is spending time together So I would just try to like invite them over for coffee or tea or whatever you do in your country Yeah First I'll say that I'm just shocked that you're interested at this like when I
Starting point is 00:17:15 Don't know I feel like most young people probably wouldn't be like oh, how do I make my 58 year old neighbor like me? That's how do you think that that's John, or is that am I crazy? No, I think it's good news, though, if we can live in a world where people want to actually have social engagement with their neighbors, I think that's great. Yeah. So I'll say that you took a good first step in wanting to have this be the case, and I encourage other people to know who their neighbors are. But yeah, I think that I wouldn't say that there's, I wouldn't guess that there's dislike, but I would think that there's just like, you know, we're not going to have so much
Starting point is 00:17:53 in common. And so we're going to hang out with all of the people around us who we know and have stuff in common with us. But I will say that I have some really rewarding relationships with people who are, you know, more than 30 years older than me, and it is really cool to be able to have those relationships because that kind of diversity of perspectives and worldviews is really informative and interesting. I totally agree, Hank. As I usually do, we don't have enough fighting on this podcast.
Starting point is 00:18:23 We need to find things that we disagree about. Speaking of which, we have a question from Aaron who writes, dear John and Hank, when is it appropriate to get into an argument on the internet for other ones? What is worth fighting for? We're probably gonna, God bless you Aaron, for,
Starting point is 00:18:39 yeah, for even asking that question instead of just getting into a fight on the internet, which is what everyone else is doing. Right. Well, maybe we should get into fight about this question, John, but we'll probably will agree. I will say that oftentimes people say that the reason you argue on the internet isn't about convincing the person you're arguing with.
Starting point is 00:18:58 It's about convincing the bystanders, and that is bull. That's just a bunch of honky. I am like, when I see that argument, I'm like, it makes me cringe so hard, because like what you're saying is like that your argument, like is this thing that like, that there's, it's like a spectator's sport, like internet arguments.
Starting point is 00:19:17 It's public performance. Yeah. And to me, like the argument as public performance is such an evil, is such an evil way to think about public discourse, which is what we're talking about. And when you should argue on the internet, the only reason you should argue on the internet is if you come out of the argument with a more nuanced view of the world and a better appreciation of the perspective and the values of the person you are arguing with, in other words, never.
Starting point is 00:19:46 Like, that's what you should be aiming for and that's never what's happening. Yeah, I mean, I think you should argue on the internet if you can do so respectfully and thoughtfully. And like Hank said, like, emerge from it with a more nuanced understanding of the world around you, which is very, very rare. But I don't think that it's impossible,
Starting point is 00:20:08 and I don't quite think that it's never, because I, for many, many years, I felt that the critique around work that Hank and I did was just incredibly generous and thoughtful, but at the same time, like, wasn't like a bunch of people just agreeing with us to agree with us, like lots of, we would be wrong at times, and it would be pointed out to us in ways that were respectful and thoughtful.
Starting point is 00:20:37 And then I think when we were at our best at least, or when we are at our best at least, like, we can listen to that, internalize it, and change. And I do think that can happen in online discourse. I have seen it in my own life. I know that it is rare. I know that the quality of conversation online is notoriously poor. And sometimes it's so bad that you just have to remove yourself from the conversation, which frankly is what I've felt like I've had to do in the last few months. And to be honest, I think my life is better for it. But I don't believe that there is no good
Starting point is 00:21:15 or interesting or critical conversation happening online. I agree, I agree. But sort of implicit in Aaron's question is, you know, what is worth fighting for? Like, when you see something that just, it feels like that shall not stand. I must do something about this. Yeah, I mean, I think there's a lot, I think there's a lot that's worth fighting for, but I don't think that the right way to have the fight is to scream people on the internet and try to prove to them that they're wrong.
Starting point is 00:21:45 The right way to have the fight is, you know, in how you live your life and in your values and in how you vote and in the conversations that you have with people who are willing to be open and listen and when you are willing to be open and listen. I agree. We've got another question. This one is from Sinella who says,
Starting point is 00:22:03 we speak a different language in our house. Over time, I've lost some of that language and get by every day only through basic conversational phrases. I really like and value my relationship with my parents, but I find that I can't always talk about different opinions and complicated topics because I have trouble explaining myself. It feels like I'm a different person with my friends than I am at home, where I somehow dumb down and can't express my personality and thoughts. People say that who you are at home is more representative of your actual identity. Do you agree?
Starting point is 00:22:32 How do I show more of my personality at home? And can I have an honest relationship with my parents? I think that's really hard. What a great question. We have such interesting listeners. Yeah, it's such an interesting, and I had a friend when I was growing up who was in this situation, more with his grandparents than with his parents who also lived in his house, who he was basically unable to communicate with.
Starting point is 00:22:57 But that is a... It's a tension that I obviously never had to deal with speaking one language and, and nothing else and, and being raised in a very homogenous little world. But, you know, there, there is, there is a universality in, in some of this, which is, which is like, do you feel like you, like, like, what is your identity? And, and if you lose that in your home life, if you sort of can't have that in your home life, like, what is your identity? And if you lose that in your home life, if you sort of can't have that in your home life, like, what does that mean for you?
Starting point is 00:23:30 Yeah, I actually think that this would be a good time to use our listeners and our hashtags, Hank, because we're not gonna be able to give much direct advice here, but maybe hashtag advice number four, Chanela, advice for Chanela, S-H-A-N-E-L-A, could be a good source of advice because I think we're not gonna have much direct to say about this, but I don't agree at all
Starting point is 00:23:55 that who you are at home needs to be most representative of your actual identity. And also, I mean, there's something inherent about the limits of language for everyone, that sort of circumscribed the way that we are able to talk about ourselves and express our, you know, concerns and passions to other people. But that's far, far more complicated when, you know, you don't have the skills in the language to do that with the kind of nuance that you feel like you need to. So I think it would be a really interesting thing to hear from
Starting point is 00:24:33 other listeners about who've maybe had direct experience with it. I agree with you, John. We have possibly one more question. And this one is from Toby, who asks, Dear Hank and John, in meteorology, climate models predict future events based on current conditions. The models are created in tune using past weather conditions. However, climate change will begin or more likely has begun to change the climate. So if pre-climate change, weather events of an area can no longer accurately reflect current or future, whether our weather models will become inaccurate. So my question is, will we no longer be able to have forecasts? What kind of economic and sociological problems will this pose?
Starting point is 00:25:15 Toby, you, this is such a minor problem on the scale of climate change. It is a thing to be somewhat concerned with, especially when it comes to local forecasts and local leather people who know their local leather patterns and sort of know what to expect. And they will potentially be wrong more often. But compared with, say, you know, having to build a wall around New York City, or like not having water fall on crops. I'm less worried about this particular problem. Well, but I think no, the larger issue,
Starting point is 00:25:50 I think that Toby is talking about is a concern about not just like being able to have forecasts, but forecasts being very useful for not just like people who want to go to the beach, but farmers who need to understand to the beach, but farmers who need to understand what the rainfall levels will likely be during certain months of the year. But the other thing to note is that weather and climate are very different things. It is the patterns that we see that we can understand, you know, one or two or five days out,
Starting point is 00:26:26 those things actually won't change. Like, like high pressure systems, low pressure systems, like what those things bring, what, you know, cold fronts, and like that stuff's gonna, like, we'll be able to see that coming, we'll be able to do these short-term predictions, predicting climate and predicting whether are very, very separate things.
Starting point is 00:26:43 So I'm actually, I'm not super concerned about this. Man, that's... But predicting climate is really important for farmers. Predicting weather, right? Like, no, climate. Like the likelihood that there will be, like in certain years because of larger climate patterns, there will be more rain or less rain in certain seasons, right?
Starting point is 00:27:07 Like the rainy season, correct me if I'm wrong because I am not a scientist, but the rainy season, you know, may move in, in eastern Africa depending on whether there's, you know, the temperature of the ocean water is this or that or whatever. Yeah, I mean, that sort of an ocean water is this or that, or whatever. Yeah, I mean, that sort of an...
Starting point is 00:27:27 That seems like a big problem. That's an in-betweeny place. That's a place in-between what we would call, I think, meteorology versus climate science. So, yeah, I mean, whether, I mean, like, the atmosphere is a very dynamic and changeable and weird thing, And our understandings of it generally reach out to like two days from now in terms of actually like predictive science.
Starting point is 00:27:56 But larger weather patterns can have these sort of like you can sort of make a bet. You can bet one way or another. And that is, that is a concern. And I hadn't thought about it. So thank you to Toby for bringing that up. But Hank, you are on record as saying that you think that climate change is going to be a fairly big deal in the coming century. I am on record as says saying that. Yes, that is a, as a safe position. I wanted to ask you about some about some stuff I've read recently.
Starting point is 00:28:27 Here's the biggest question that I have. Do you think, and again, I don't know much about climate science, so I might be way off here, but do you think there's any way that we could have Taylor Swift do concerts everywhere? You know, so that like after she left, there would be these like months of joyous, beautiful blue skies.
Starting point is 00:28:48 Well, I think that'd be a huge problem. If Taylor Swift did simultaneous concerts everywhere and then there was two months straight of blue skies, we would run out of water real quick. That would be called the Swift Ock-El-Ips and it would just, most people would die. So you would be opposed to that. I do like the idea though.
Starting point is 00:29:08 I like the concept. I just want to check, because I'm trying to figure out like, maybe there's a different band that brings rain, the way that Taylor's concert brought this incredibly beautiful weather to Indianapolis. And so anyway, I'm just gonna keep, just keep it in the back of your mind,
Starting point is 00:29:24 because I know there's lots of different approaches to what we're gonna do with climate change. I know that there's lots of people working hard on lots of solutions, but I'm just saying this is more. Well, we need a more diverse, you know, round up of musical acts that affect the weather. We need some people who make it warmer, some people who make it rain,
Starting point is 00:29:41 some people who make it cooler, some people who make it cooler. So we need diversity. Yeah, and it seems, at least it appears that all Taylor can do is bring blue cloud with skies and beautiful early fall weather. So we're going to need someone who can reliably deliver the rain. I'm going to work on that. That'll be my project for the next few weeks while you work on other solutions to climate change. Should we's time for the news from Mars and AFC Wimbledon?
Starting point is 00:30:28 Yes, although we should acknowledge that what's happened is that Hank broke something in his podcasting because he's incompetent and I'm very competent and I'm the good one and he's the bad one. And so we've had to do the news from the glorious future where we are here physically together at nerdcon stories in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Hank, what is the news from Mars? The news from Mars. Let me see if I can remember what the news from Mars was. I actually do remember. What was it? Nope, I'm not going to make easy for you. But basically, the news from Mars was this amazing thing about that the Mars doesn't have a magnetic field and that's why the atmosphere that was once
Starting point is 00:31:08 on Mars sort of blew away due to solar winds after I do this you're going to do the news from a fc winbillton and what we learned is that this may be because Mars used to have this heavy metal core and then magma and then a crust and that sort of solid liquid solid vibe is what allowed this magnetic field to exist but now it's solid at least in parts all the way down although there are parts of Mars that are still magnanimous. That doesn't mean what I thought it meant. Anyway so we're starting to try to understand why that happened in the hopes that we can eventually build a Martian atmosphere maybe that doesn't blow away. And that's the news from Mars.
Starting point is 00:31:55 Those roughly, he skipped a little step, which is that now there is no longer a magnetic field because Mars is mostly solid all the way through. Maybe you did say that, and I just misunderstood. longer a magnetic field because Mars is mostly solid all the way through. Maybe you did say that and I just misunderstood. I did say that. I nailed the news from Mars. What's the news from Nancy Wimbledon? How do we do in our last couple of games? You tied, which one of them, which was against another team.
Starting point is 00:32:19 That's right. And that was a little disappointing. Yes, but then the other one. But then the other one, you won. What was the score? I think it was three won. It was two Yes, but then the other one. But then the other one, you won. What was the score? I think it was three won. It was two new, but you got the spread correct. And that means that ASU and Muldin now has a zero goal
Starting point is 00:32:35 differential, which means that they've scored the same number of goals that they have given up. That's right. And they are solidly in the middle of the pack of tier two, tier four, tier four English football. Oh God, can you imagine the days when we might be a second tier English football club
Starting point is 00:32:56 Hank, the glory. All right. The glory that awaits AFC Wimbledon. But yes, we beat Barnett and tied Northampton Town. And Rosieanna, how's Barnett pronounced? Barnett. So we we beat Barnett and tied Northampton town and Rosiana Howes Barnett pronounced? Barnett. So we beat? Barnett. Like bonnet. Like the thing you wear on your head.
Starting point is 00:33:10 We dominated Bonnet, we beat them two-neil. And how do we say Northampton? Northampton. Oh, okay, that was weird close on that one. Alright, so that's the news from Mars and Anci Wimbledon. Sorry, Hank's podcasting equipment broke, but You know this wasn't bad. I had a original one. I had a great joke about how if we just put black sand bit at the center of Mars That was really good. Then potentially we get an atmosphere on Mars again because we have to heavy metal core. Yes Right, and then I made a joke about what's in there mini fridge?
Starting point is 00:33:40 Yeah, which which was funny in context, but not really funny when we summarize it. So with that, with that noted, we are going to go ahead and end the podcast. Thank you for listening. You can always write us your questions, comments, concerns, recommendations for short poems at Hank and John gmail.com. This podcast is edited by Nicholas Jenkins, who has been a real trooper in getting this together, despite the fact that we're doing it partially at NerdCon Stories. The theme music is by Gunnarola and Maureen Johnson. What do they say in our hometown? Oh, don't forget to be awesome!
Starting point is 00:34:19 Did I do it right? That was great. That was great. Great. Yeah. That was great.

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