Dear Hank & John - 262: The Old Ramen Factory (Live in Carmel, IN!)

Episode Date: October 19, 2020

What's up with roundabouts? What should my former foster grandpa name be? What are your weirdest stress coping mechanisms? What's your absurd dream scent? What are your favourite non-touristy places in Indiana? What would happen if a werewolf went to the moon? How do I cope with taking extra time for college? What do I do for a disrupted honeymoon? What do I bring when moving to a new country? How can I get my partner and cat to get along? Hank Green and John Green have answers, but keep in mind they're answers FROM THE PAST! Specifically from March 10, 2020, so before ... you know, *gestures broadly* really popped off for their particular locales. Just know that sometimes dubious advice and the questions that inspire it age kinda weirdly! If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at [e-mail]. Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn. Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn

Can you believe that we still have live shows from back when there were live shows? Well, we do. We do. We save them for times when we know that we're not going to be able to make deerhank and John like during pizza mess. So we weren't, we didn't record a deerhank and John this week because John and I were just pushing hard, trying to make way more content than we usually do. I hope you enjoyed pizza mess. It is usually do. I hope you enjoyed pizza.

Miss it is over now. I hope you had a good all time if you were like, oh, I was gonna get my pizza. It's too late. It's too late. I'm very sorry. I shouldn't even mentioned it. I apologize if you are listening to this like before noon Maybe sometimes you leave it open to for like customer support reasons, but you'd have to go look really fast. Anyway, it doesn't matter. I could start out with a joke for you. You know why I don't like political jokes? Because sometimes they get elected. Hey, but um, all right, everybody. Welcome to the episode of Dear Hank and John that we recorded live in Indianapolis, Indiana. Oh yeah, what was it called? It was called Pooja Daddy. Thanks everybody. I appreciate it. It's not my best performance. I never like it when people from out of town try to appeal to Central Indiana by being like,

I heard this one thing on my way from the airport, you know? Like, every major artist, including, of course, my brother Hank Green, noted American recording artist, is always doing that. I think it's, we're gonna ask a lot of Indiana specific questions tonight though, because a lot of Indiana-specific questions tonight though, because a lot of you had Indiana-specific questions. And also, I am an expert, I think.

You are Indiana-specific. Yeah. I am. I still struggle to say I am a housier. Because anyone else has this problem where he's like, I am a housier, but I prefer to call myself an Indian. And I like to pause in the middle of it and say, I'm an Indian, I'm, or.

I love them. I live in the middle. Yeah. Nearsroads of America. Near the top. Another thing that he learned on the way from the air. My son. My son. Nearsroads of America, near the top. Another thing that he learned on the way from the airport. My son!

My son! Woohoo! Woohoo! Hey, let's begin. I saw several roads crossing. Yeah. In America. We have a lot of, there's a lot of roads that do cross, but not in Carmel.

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. This is very cool. I am fascinated. Let's begin there and just get it out of the way. This question comes from Mike who writes him here with my daughter, Tessa. Hi, Tessa. Thanks for coming. Mike, thank you as well. I bet there's a pretty good chance you're just like, who the hell are these people? I appreciate you for being here. Thank you. It's your second here. Thank you.

It's your second show. Do you go last night? Oh good, because it was similar. Well. Mike writes, my question is, what's with all the roundabouts? People barely slow down and don't appear to know what merge means.

Everyone thinks they have the right of the way. How is this safe? Mike, first of all, don't slow down. Just plow on through. Don't be cautious, it's around about. What could go wrong? Everything. If you could be in an accident, sure, but you're not going to be badly hurt.

You could be. That's... Tuna cut all of this out of the podcast. Bad devices are great. Go right over the middle. That's date. Mike, if you think that I'm going to come to Carmel India, Tokyo drifted.

You just let me know when you're ready. I'm good now. Okay. Mike, if you think I'm going to come to Carmel, Indiana, and express my personal opinion about roundabouts, you've got another thing coming, buddy. Come, no dummy. Lots of people say they're safer.

Lots of data says maybe they aren't. All I know is that they're here? That's the end of the sentence. Well, okay. I have a, I have, coming into Carmel, Indiana, I had a strong opinion about, roundabout, so just that they are always good. My ninth roundabout in on the way here, I was feeling actually nauseated,

and I started to think maybe they are not always good. But the city planners of the world know more about this than I do, and I will let them be in charge Though I don't know that any were in charge in the planning of this I think someone went to Europe and they were like this is great. Let's do that But in Indiana the truth the truth has always resisted simplicity. Let's move on. I Wasn't ready. Okay, we were going to stick on roundabouts. This next question comes from Zachary who asks,

Dear Hank and John, my wife and I are both in our 20s. For the past year, we have been foster parents to a wonderful 17-year-old girl who has a one-year-old son. That's lovely. She got to move home and was reunited with her biological family, but we still get to hang out regularly with both of them. The little guy is on a new talk now, but we're not sure what he should call me. What should my former foster grandpa nickname be?

For reference, I affectionately refer to him as the chonk. It's a great, that's good. That's a great baby name. Uh-huh, the chonk. We've all met a chonk, haven't we? It's a great, that's good. That's a great baby name. Uh-huh. The Chonk. We've all met a chonk haven't we? Yeah, the ones that are like square. They're like, come out and you're like,

whoa, you're a whole rectangle. You're just a, you're a little chonk. Yeah. Just rolls right up the tongue. But right up against all the other parts. You really got to get into that neck fold. That must be a work. When you're doing the washing.

It's exciting. I like it when they come out like little linebackers. Just let me know when you're done. Tokyo drifted. Don't Tokyo drift a baby? No. Also, I have a very strong suspicion you haven't seen the film.

I haven't seen the film. I know, I know. I have, because there's one thing that I love in this world when it comes to films more than any other thing. And that is when the name of the film begins with the words, the fast and the furious. No.

We got you. You want to talk about, you want to talk about nine great movies. I hear you. I see you. I agree. Nine great, yeah. This is a place where cars go fast.

Another thing that I, We're getting away from the question. And it's a very important question. And I actually have an answer, Zachary. The little guy is called chunk. and you should be called big chunk. Zachary, big chunk. This is great. I don't know.

I think we should do away with Zachary entirely, not just for this baby, but in general, I think it should just be big chunk from here on out. Yeah. I like how you completely disregarded your wife. You're like, I don't care what they call this job called my wife, but I want to know what I shall be called and you shall be big chalk. Count Chonky-Lok.

You got a lot to work with this Chonk business. I think y'all are going to be just fine. Oh, yeah. Chonk-Lok Chip. Yeah, looks kind of cute. Yeah yeah, chocolate chip. Yeah, that's kind of cute. Yeah, thanks John, I appreciate that. All right, this next question comes from Stephanie, here right, dear John and Hank, what are some of your weird coping mechanisms

for dealing with stress? Mm. I don't know why you'd ask me that question, Stephanie. Kind of offended. I have a, I think I've talked about this before, but I have a very strange stress response that I have encountered other people who have this, but it is not common.

Which is that I get very sleepy, and this is really convenient. Because one way of not being stressed out is to be unconscious. And I, like, and I don't really understand how this works because oftentimes, when I have a lot to think about, I will sit there and I will stare at the ceiling

and I will think for a long time, and that will go on until two or three in the morning. But if I'm very stressed out, my body just turns off, and I'm like, thanks. It's like a sloth. Yeah. That's what I was trying to think of a possum. Yeah, do it again.

Tuna, wait, I'm gonna do it again. By the way, Tuna's our editor, he's not here, so when I'm looking off into the distance, he's not there. That's just where he lives in my imagination. Like when I record the pod at home, I also look to my left. But wait, Tuna, I'm gonna crush it this time. So you like a possum. Like a possum.

I just fall. Thank you for the fake laughs. Yeah. That's it. That's it. When you hear that on the show, it's gonna sound so real. LAUGHTER I have a lot of stress responses.

Um, and a lot of them are weird. It's doing some of them right now. Yeah, I have a lot of coping mechanisms. A lot of them are weird. I's doing some of them right now. Yeah, I have a lot of coping mechanisms. A lot of them are weird. I mean, mostly I stare into the middle distance to be totally honest with you. There's so much that's happening inside of my mind. You know?

That like, I don't need to do anything. Everything's happening in here. And it's real intense. It's a hurricane. It's a hurricane. Let's move on. I've got a thing. So I recently was reading an article about whether you have a healthy relationship with work.

And one of the questions that it asked you to ask yourself was, do you use work to alter your mood? And I was like, unseem that. I don't want to, I am in this picture and I don't like it kind of moment. And yes, I do. And that is a thing that I do to handle stresses that I work, which is I think why I get so much done sometimes.

When I'm working, I feel like as if I am doing the thing to make the stress go away. And so people are like, how are you so productive? And I'm like, well, I sign up for too much to do. And then I get very scared of not accomplishing that. And then the only recourse I have is to get rid of the bad feeling. And the only way to do that is to do the work. So that's my strategy as I just find things to work on or create new ones.

If there's oftentimes, I don't know if you've noticed, there are external stressors that we cannot control. Nobody knows anything about that right now. And I, yes, I will, I will create new work for myself so that I can feel as if I am acting upon something that I can control, which is not necessarily healthy, but you just ask what my coping mechanisms were on that. That is one. Okay. All right. I'm going to ask another question, Hank. It's a good one. Okay. This next question comes from Sarah who writes, Dear John and Hank, the other night I dreamt that my fiance Joseph and I return to our parked car

to find a citation on the window. Oh no. I'm sorry Sarah, even when that happens in a dream, it's a little bit upsetting. The police identified us by our scents. Okay. Okay. I was identified as perfume and Joseph as old ramen.

Okay. I can't stop thinking about this weird dream. It's made me wonder if you had an absurd dream scent. What would it be? Okay, but like, like your dream scent is not absurd at all. It's totally normal. You're perfume. It's his dream scent. It's weird. Yeah, you're like in your own mind, you're like,

you know what I am? The normal thing for people to smell like if they would like to smell like anything. Oh, I'm perfume. I'm perfume. Joseph. Hold on, ramen. He's like soup, but after a while.

That's actually really good. Since you have a wedding coming up, I don't know if you want to write your own vows, but that would be great in it. Yeah. You know, I guess the police would probably write down that I smelled of anxiety sweat. Mm. Anxious sweat. It's a specific kind. Yeah, yeah. What about you?

I think, could I be like honeycomb? I was thinking you might smell of unwarranted confidence. But I want to be like honeycomb. Yeah, yeah, no, I know what you want to be like. I was just thinking what you might smell like, according to this scent cop, in the dreams. One of the scent that is really stuck with me is pelican mites. And I really hope it's not.

Great new thing to worry about. I go, oh my, I go, I'm making note. That's the right thing I want to know. I want to make a note to include that in my list this evening. After my nightly prayers, I go through my nightly worries, and now we're going to have Pelican mites. Great. Oh, Google those fellas, and I'm sure it'll be great. Well, they don't smell great.

It's a real, it's surprisingly strong, but also completely foreign. It's like dust, but times a gajillion. If you just like ever had a dust smell in your nose, it's like that, but like, you boiled it down into its pure essence. Yeah. And it really gets stuck in your nose. Okay.

So hopefully it's not Pelican mites. Great, yeah. I'd rather be old ramen. All right. This question is from Melissa, who asks Steerhank a John. My question is mostly for John. That's why I liked it. My husband and I just recently moved to Indiana.

And we're... Everybody in the room likes Indiana. That's great. We want to do more exploring around Indie. What are some of your favorite non-tourist places to visit in the area? Are there touristy places? I really appreciate you implying

that there are touristy places. Yeah. That means a lot to us. Yeah. We're trying. Oh, there's an olive garden. Yeah. Hey, hey, hey, hey. We're trying. There's an Olive Garden. Yeah.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, we have like nine Olive Gardens. We don't have an Olive Garden in Mizzoula and I kind of, I kind of like, when I come to Indiana and I'm like, I need to go to Olive Garden. One thing, those sticks. One thing people told me when I first arrived to Indianapolis that I found really helpful was that Indianapolis is the number one test market for chain restaurants in the United States. Like if you

have an idea for a chain restaurant, you bring it to Indianapolis because if it works here, it'll work all over the country. Yeah, we've got to find out we've got to see. We're so average. Yeah. the country. We've got to find out. We've got to see. We're so average. Yeah. Will Old Ramen work in Indianapolis? The Old Ramen Factory is a great restaurant concept. Yeah, I like it. I think you should work on that. Okay. I'm just going to give you two things that I really, really love here. Number one is the Indiana State Museum. It's this amazing, what's so beautiful and fascinating

about the Indiana State Museum, Agnes, is that it's the whole history of earth, but only the part that is currently Indiana. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha incredible. That's very good. There's a whole period where they don't have a lot of fossil records because there was this huge glacier that came down from the north and went all across Indiana. And so there's a little display about that and why they don't have more information about the era of the era of the dinosaurs. Because unfortunately, any fossils were kind of washed, pushed down south. So let's move on to the next thing that we know about Indiana. I love it so much. I love everything about it, but it's also like an incredible cultural resource and incredible.

History resource is really, really wonderful. The other thing, and this is a day trip, but it's totally worth it. Not too far away from here is the world's largest ball of paint? Yes. I know. We've got some fans in the audience. Well, everyone who's ever been there, they have rest of people are just not yet. They will be fans in the fullness of time.

The world's largest ball of paint, first off, it's much, much bigger than seems possible. It started out as a baseball. A person painted it. They kept painting it. They painted like 75,000 layers. And then eventually they donated it to their city town hall where it still is. And now it's like the size of this table,

but it's a ball of paint. And you can paint a layer on the world's largest ball of paint, which is, dare I say, like almost a transformative experience. Because what you realize when you paint a layer on the world's largest ball of paint is that- like almost a transformative experience. Because what you realize when you paint a layer on the world's largest ball of paint is that... Do you have to pay to paint a layer? No. Who buys the paint?

I don't know. It's just a wonderful thing. I think maybe you can donate. So what you realize when you paint a layer on the world's largest ball of paint is that each of us is painting a layer on the world's largest ball of paint that is this world. And like we are painting it together and we are not like individual geniuses trying to make like singular works of art or whatever.

We are like people, human beings working together to make beautiful, strange, weird, awesome things like the world's largest ball of paint. You're going to get covered up by the next layer of paint, but that doesn't mean that you weren't there. Exactly. Yes. You made it sound like that's sad. No, well.

That's great news. I wasn't there. You were there. You were there. And you're still there. You're still there. You're just not visible anymore. Yeah.

It's amazing. Go to the World's Largest Ball of Fame. But also, yeah, there's so many things to visible anymore. Yeah, it's amazing. Go to the World's Orange Ball Paint. But also, yeah, there's so many things to do. There's great restaurants as well. We just went to Root and Bone, a nice new Southern restaurant. Apparently, it doesn't have that many fans. The rest of you should go there. But yeah, it's a great town. It just takes a while. Give it some time.

This next question comes from Aaron. Dear Hank and John, what would happen if a werewolf went to the moon? Okay. So I'm not, I'm not Hondo P on, no werewolf's work. See, people like it. No, no, no, no, no, you're misinterpreting the applause. It was an at-you-not-with-you-f.

Wear wolves are people, usually. Or all the time, I'm not entirely. They're people all the time. Yes. But sometimes they are also wolf people. Right. They're always wear wolves, even when they're in people for. Great point, Hank.

So. But then when they are in people for. Great point, Hank. So, but then when they are aware wolf, they are still aware wolf, but now they are the wolfie part. So what I'm imagining, obviously this person has had to go through an extensive period of astronaut training to get to the moon. Yes. Throughout that whole time has had to avoid training on full moons. Yeah, because then it would all be clear, right? Like now it's not just like our, our harriest astronaut.

It's a wearable astronaut and people would freak out. Yeah, astronaut Gerald Harrison never goes to work once a month. We're not sure what that's about. Yeah, he just has has a periodic flu. Anyway, so then he gets to the moon. And he, after all that. And he goes out onto the surface of the moon. Right.

And is it that when the moon is full from earth, that is the time, because the moon is always, like some part of the moon is always full in some direction. It's being hit by the sun, unless it moon is always, like some part of the moon is always full in some direction. It's being hit by the sun, unless it's being eclipsed. So the moon is always kind of full. Wow. What?

The moon is always full. It's just sometimes we don't see it. Yeah. Dang. That's deep, man. Not since I thought about the world's largest ball of paint, I've been so moved by an That's deep, man. Not since I thought about the world's largest ball of paint, I've been so moved by an image. So yeah, so I think, like, doesn't matter what the people on Earth seeing or is it like

now, does the Earth become the werewolf's moon? So when it's a full Earth, then the werewolf turns into a wolf. Yeah. Which also happens, I think, once a month. Once every 27 days are happening. And that would be catastrophic, right? Because, well, no matter what, you do not want to be in a capsule with a wolf. Right.

No, I was thinking to be catastrophic for the werewolf, because it's in its human space suit. And one thing we always see, the moon, and then now it's a wolf. Well, that's the end. Yeah. That is a rickum out. It's like, I don't like it in here.

I like to get out. And then vacuum of space, et cetera. Yeah. So that's what would happen if a werewolf went to the moon Either everyone in the capsule would die or the werewolf would die alone On the cold cold or hot hot surface of the moon depending on whether it was day or night Anyway, thanks to my to my kids for being here A terrible death Oh, it would, it would be very quick.

Quick. This next question comes from Beth. He writes, I've been struggling with comparing myself to other people. I'm a college junior who just took a year off of school due to mental health concerns. Coming back, I feel like I'm behind my peers. Of course, this is a perfectly legitimate reason, and everyone has their own path in life, and blah, blah, blah. However, I feel like I'm not living up to my potential. And it's hard, any advice for how to get over these feelings?

Beth, I'm sorry, this is happening. I was also a college junior who took a semester away from school for mostly for mental health reasons, although I did also have whooping cough as it happens. They kind of compounded each other. I don't deal great with infectious diseases. I remember that feeling, though. I remember coming back to school

and all of my classmates were ahead of me now, and I even remember watching them graduate and being in the audience and not having my cap and gown and everything and watching everybody I'd started college with Finnish. And here's me not finishing and how awkward and I felt so awkward and uncomfortable. And then my friends were trying to make me feel better, but I could tell, you know, that they were also like, oh my God, he has to go back to college. And so I understand that that's real,

but when you say like I know this is a perfectly legitimate reason and everyone has their own path in life and blah, blah, blah. I also understand that impulse, but that's true. Yeah. Like everyone has their own path in life. And it was a perfectly legitimate reason. And you are still gonna go to school

and you are still gonna finish and when you are 42 years old, like I am, nobody will have any idea that it took you five years to graduate from college until and unless you say as much on a podcast. Yeah. Yeah. And at which point no one will care or even think that that's at all unusual. Yeah, and they'll be like, oh, it's kind of nice that he's saying that and everything.

But at the time it was horribly, you know, I felt terrible about it and I did feel like a failure. But I wasn't a failure because what I had done was I had done what I needed to do to take care of myself to achieve the things that I wanted to achieve in my life. And there are so many times still, honestly, when I compare myself to more productive people I might know and feel like, oh gosh, I wish I could get more done in a day. And like, I'm so unproductive and I lose so much of my day to these problems or whatever or I don't do this fast whatever. I don't do this fast enough or I don't do that fast enough or I'm not as good at this or that. You are

you and like you are doing your, like if you're doing your best, you're doing your best. And that's worth celebrating, I think. So often we end up, yeah. It's just so often we end up refusing to celebrate good things that happen to us, like the fact that you did make it back to school, for instance, like instead of seeing that as a huge success, which it is, we're all still kind of like formulating these things as weaknesses. And I think, like, celebrate that success,

so maybe go out tonight and be like, I did it. I went back to college. Now they may send me home in a week, but I went back. And it'll pass. Take it from America's leading hypokondriac. The only thing I will add is that we never stop comparing ourselves to each other. That happens for all of life. And when we can find the ways to get over that, to get through it, to realize that, yes, we all have our own ways that we are great in our own ways that we're messed up is really

freeing and I don't think that I'll ever get there with everybody, but I do get there with some people in my life where I don't see them as things that I compare myself to, but I see them as just people living their own ways because I know them well enough and understand them deeply enough. But it is very natural and normal to be trying to find the ways in which we matter in the world. And one big one is that we compare ourselves to each other and to our former selves.

And that's not a good way, but it is a way that you can't help but do, I think. And so there is always going to be that. And I think until I don't know anybody who's gotten all the way over that one. The Buddha. I don't know him. We've not met. Which reminds me that today's podcast

is brought to you by Beth. Beth, you did it, you went back to school. Woo! Woo! This podcast is also brought to you by your absurd scent. The very strange scent that the police officers identify you by in your dreams. This podcast is also, of course, brought to you by the Indiana State Museum, the Indiana State Museum, only Indiana.

And this podcast is brought to you by the Tokyo Drift, whatever that may be. It's amazing. This question comes from Jen who asks, dear Hank and John, I want to start a podcast, but I don't know how to do anything involved from recording to editing, to publishing, to advertising, I also have no equipment and no money. I also hate hearing my own recorded voice played back to me. How can I overcome these obstacles?

That's all of them. And start a successful podcast, Jennifer. I have some suggestions. But I don't know if I have all of them. I think we should go in reverse order. Let's start with you hate the sound of your recorded voice. That might never go away. Yeah, that's just the thing. Like everybody hates the sound of your recorded voice. That might never go away. Yeah, just that's just the thing.

Like everybody hates the sound of their voice. I can't tell you the distance between my singing voice as I hear it in my hand, and my singing voice as I hear it when recorded. I think that's just a human thing. And eventually you get over it and you just, you listen to the grating sound of your own voice enough that you just accept it for what it is. Then having no equipment or money is a small problem.

What I will say to this is if you have an iPhone and you may not, but if you have a smartphone, they often actually have pretty good mics. And I've been kind of shocked by how like the quality of audio I can get out of this smartphone. Then that can be your intro to that. And then why not only to recording by the way, but also to editing. So you can edit a whole podcast on the Voice Memo's app on iPhone or there's a very similar app on other, on they're called Android phones and Hank has that Hank has one that's why I was

turned to him instead of Tatuna but yeah so I like I don't want to embarrass him but my son actually recorded an amazing podcast using just the voice memos app on an iPad. And so he recorded the audio, cut it all together, and it sounded really good. It sounded quite professional, actually. So that shouldn't be the barrier to entry. And it seems like you do have an idea because your only concerns are recording editing, publishing, advertising, etc.

So just make the podcast and then Google the rest about publishing. You can totally figure out all that stuff is totally figure outable. Yeah, it's doable. Except for advertising, which will require there to be an audience and ask for how to build an audience. We have no idea. We don't know. We haven't done it in 13 years.

So our advice is to go to January 1st, 2007. Make really bad YouTube videos. When no one else is doing it. And be surprised by how generous people are. All right. Okay. So I'm going to tell people to come up and come to the microphones where you will ask your question live Okay, so who do we have first in line? It's Carrie and Sam. Carrie and Sam, hi. I know I did that even submitted a question. Oh surprise Sam

All right hit us. Okay, so we got Mary last month and we were going to go to Italy But that's out. Oh, and so we're here go to Italy but that's out. Oh. And so we're here. Hey! Hey! So, love it. So this is your honeymoon.

This is your honeymoon. Or your free honeymoon right now? Yeah. Congratulations. That's two days. Thanks. All right. So is your question, what should you do in Indianapolis?

No. No, it's the do not miss. Like, what do I have to say to you? OK. Well, I think the most important thing No, no, it's like they do not miss like what do I have to say? Well, I think the most important thing is that I wrote you a song It's a little ditty Bout Carrie and Sam Two American kids visiting the heartland

Carrie said we should go to Venice after we went But then they decided maybe Indiana instead. Oh yeah, Carmel's great. It leaves fine, but it's no who's your state. Oh yeah, I said life goes on. And this way you get to be on dear Hank and John. Thank you. That's great.

That made me super nervous. Why, you crushed it. You crushed it. I'm glad you can still experience nervousness. That's encouraging. Who was next? Who was the next question? Anybody over here?

Oh yeah. I'm Melissa. Hi. So I'm moving most likely to promise you that you're the best ever. Who is next? Who is the next question? Anybody over here? Oh yeah, so low. I'm Melissa. Hi. So I'm moving most likely to Prague. There's a chance I might be in Budapest in August. Nice.

And I have no idea what I need to pack. I'm moving for at least a year, but hopefully this school will like me and keep me on staff forever. So you're moving to one of two cities forever. Yeah. We're hopefully. Yeah, so what do I put in my suitcase?

How many suitcases do you get? So like the little... Two suitcases and a carry on. Yeah, well you get. Have you ever been on a plane? Well, you get personal items. And the personal items. You get the person, you have a personal item,

a carry on and two suitcases forever. And you're not even sure which city it's gonna be. So, there are similar climates though. I mean, it's gonna be fine. If you're moving, if you're moving not even the same country, if you're moving forever, yeah, that I wouldn't worry about, I wouldn't worry too much about like clothes.

I would worry more about like, Yeah, the things that you need. Do you still have photo albums? Or is that over? That's my parents have them. Your parents have them? Yeah. Oh god. Oh god. LAUGHTER Yeah, so I guess actually you don't need two suitcases,

just just bring your phone. Yeah. You need to be not wrapped up and you should be just fine. Yeah, bring your prescriptions and credit card and you should be good. Your iCloud.com password and everything should work out fine. Oh, man, the future is now. Do you have a copy of an absolutely remarkable thing?

I do. Oh, great. Perfect. I have like two chapters left. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah. All right. Well, you could just finish it up and not, don't take up

any valuable space there. I would take, I would only take like my four or five favorite books and only if they have real estate, like the copies themselves have sentimental value to you. And then I might take, I don't know if you have like a childhood stuffy, but if you get a little lonely when you're in a totally new place and you might want something familiar, like you know, you're like your stuff teddy bear for when you were a kid or something. And then I might take, do you have any pets?

Great, that's good. That's great news because they do not like to put the inside of a bag. Yeah. I think you're good. Yeah, I like, and the other thing is, you don't want to bring clothes, because you want to look like you're a Budapestian, right? You want to look cool, like all the Europeans. That's totally what they're called. Yeah, you want to look cool, like all the Europeans.

Yeah, well, I mean, but the people in this city must have a name. By the way, that's a really bad idea to just show up in Budapest with the clothes on your back and be like, where are the stores? I think it's great. I'd bring like three pairs of clothes. I'd bring like three changes, you know? One cold, one warm, one middle. Yeah, you wanna check to see what the weather's gonna be like.

I love this for you. I'm so excited about your adventure. I'm sad because it means that you're leaving Indianapolis potentially for quote unquote ever. Are you gonna get to see the paint before you go? Yeah. I mean, my family still, they live in Plainfield right like two minutes from the airport.

Oh, okay. So it'll just be a quick jaunt from Budapest. Okay, all right. Or a frog. Well, don't leave us behind, please. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory.

Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory.

Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory.

Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Keep us in your memory. Good lighting. Hello. Hi. My name is Kate. I recently adopted a cat about six months ago. Oh, we got a lot of cat fans. Her name is Hilda Gard and she's wonderful in every way, but she's very, very anxious, which resulted in her being all over the house in January, except by all over the house. I mean only specifically on my significant others belongings. Ah, yeah. Oh, so wait, can you rewind how she's perfect in every way? Earlier in the question, I believe. Why would she's perfect in every way?

Well, there's a way. It was not quite perfect. Sorry. This is true. OK, I would argue. I would argue it's those clothes fault for not smelling right. Yeah.

You know what? Like, helping a guard was like, I don't like this at all. Yeah. Old ramen. I've got a better smell. Yeah. I've got it. Heal the guard was probably like, you know,

I got this for breeze that comes out of me. She'll probably just do that, right? They'll be grateful. It's like juniper, but too much. So is this an issue? Well, the cat has recovered. Oh great. The boyfriend has not had.

Oh! So I was wondering if you had any advice about how to deal with this conflict without putting either one of them up for adoption? So, oh damn! Nice. So is he holding the grudge or is he just like afraid? Has the anxiety passed along from the cat to the boy? No, it's a grudge, it's just anger, I think.

Did the cat ruin anything? What was the greatest tragedy of the anxiety? Well, nothing, because we washed it all. Okay, so it's all fine. That's what I said. It's all fine. He's not here. No, he's here.

Oh, no. What do you like to defend? Yeah, someone, come on up, please. If you don't mind, no pressure. If you don't want to, it's okay. But I like to hear the. Come on up, please. If you don't mind, no pressure. If you don't want to, it's okay. But I like to hear the other side of this story. Hey, hello, hello, friend.

Hello, how cute is this cat? Okay. What a... Wow! It looks great. I will say, it looks great. It's a chunk. It's a good cat.

It's a good chunker. It's a it's a no it's a chunk. It's a it's a good cat. It's a good chunker It's good to look at I just don't love it occupying my space. You don't trust the you don't do you not trust the cat anymore? No or or Ping I really you know, it's like a child. You don't what if you don't want to leave it alone you P on the cat stuff You just got to get get a little bit even. I'm not zealot. And then the cat couldn't, was the first ever law code.

Yeah, yeah, the homeroom code. Yeah, it's a P for a P. There's only one solution here. Sorry, Hilda guard. Yeah, just didn't have to give me all your toys. You're gonna back. Did the cat pee? I'll wash them. Did the cat pee all wash them? Did the cat ever pee on you?

No, it didn't. I mean... Yeah, look, this is an unfortunate situation, but you're gonna have to forgive the cat. Because... I mean... Because there's more at play here, you know? I think there may be more at play here.

Yeah, there's like a bigger life to be had. But you only have to forgive the cat with your words and your deeds and your pee. And you can, I give you permission to hold on to some anger in your heart. Just don't express it. Just push it down. Maybe...

And have a couple of endearing moments with the cat if you can. I can see you're very well put together. I like your hair. Looks great. But maybe just let go a little bit and say, let's let this fuzz ball onto my face for a moment. Unless it's... I would not do that based on...

I would not do that based on... Hammer Rommies. Wait, was it the crowd cast name? Hilda Garde. Hilda Garde's past. By the way, great cat name. If anybody was in the market. Hammer Rommie also not bad.

Yeah. Based on Hilda Garde's past experience, I don't know that I'd let that fuzzball rub all over my face. But it's up to you. My not my taste now. Y'all are gonna work this out. I feel supremely confident now having met you both, which is great news. Oh, cheers.

Thank you. Congratulations on your cat. Thank you. Thank you. Congratulations on your cat. Thank you. We want to say a huge thanks to everybody for being here with us tonight.

A special thanks to my family and my real life friends who came out to support us tonight. A special thanks to my family and my real-life friends who came out to support us tonight and to Monica, who runs the tour and to everybody who has made us feel so welcome here at the theater and done such a great job with the sound and the lights. We really appreciate all of your support. And again, thank you. Thanks to each of you so much for being here with us tonight. It's been really special to be back in my home and able to celebrate the amazing work that's being done and Sierra Leone to reduce

maternal mortality. So thank you. Woo-woo-woo! This podcast is a co-production of Complexly and WNYC Studios. It's edited by Joseph Tuna Madesh. Wow, it's produced by Rosie on a hot swerwass and Sharon Getson. The music you're hearing now and the beginning of the podcast is by the great Gunnarola. And as they say in our hometown, don't forget to be awesome! Oh, that was amazing. Thank you so much. Good night, guys!