Dear Hank & John - 314: The Ultimate Week in Ryans (w/Ryan Reynolds!)

Episode Date: December 20, 2021

How much of the sky can I actually see? Can I return to a coffee shop if I forgot sugar and cream? Why is Ryan Reynolds on today's podcast? How can I stop picturing a mixture of Ryan Reynolds and Ryan Gosling? How do I deal with blowing an audition? How do I explain that the Ryan Reynolds I married is not today's guest? Who decides what books become movies? Hank Green and John Green and Ryan Reynolds have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at [e-mail] us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn

Hello and welcome to Dear Hank and John. Doors I prefer to think of it Dear John and Hank. It's a podcast where two brothers answer your questions, give you a DBS surprise and bring you all the weeks news from both Mars and F. C. Wimbledon. But this week with a slightly different take, you know, we love at this podcast. We love Ryan's. We love Ryan's from the two much. I'm not sure exactly why we love Ryan so much,

but we sure do. And we never really wanted thought to ourselves, what if we had a guest, wait, so sometimes we have like, when you're not there or I'm not there, we have like fill ins. We never really have guests. But I thought maybe we could get a Ryan

to be like the like, dear Hank and John and Ryan. Yeah. And I am Ryan not to be nervous about this, but not to take the dad joke duties, but yeah. We are joined today by noted Canadian actor entrepreneur. I know this, this sounds like a joke. And it sounds like we're making a joke. We're not making a joke. Ryan Reynolds is here. Oh, I had no idea this wasn't on video.

I had my lips done. I should never get to see that. Hi guys. Hello. I love that Blake just sort of said, I'll leave you in a second to your precious Anthropocene reviewed podcast. I said I'm not doing it.

Podcasts, they don't have guests. They don't even make episodes of that anymore. No, they got canceled. Yeah, I know it. That's like the I have the same relationship with Sarah the media that I listen to that Sarah engages with where she's like, I, yeah, whatever, John, just you. Yes, just go in the corner.

Last night, Katherine said to me, why are you going to be on Ryan Reynolds podcast? And I was like, I have amazing news. So we're so pleased to be joined by our special guest, Ryan Reynolds. And I wanted to begin, Ryan, if I could, by asking you a question from a listener called Cassie, who writes, dear John and Hank, at any given time, when I look up at the sky, how much of the sky am I actually seeing? Like for my vantage point, it looks like almost exactly half, but that can't be right. Can it?

Keep it classy. Cassie. Wow. This very, actually, remarkably thoughtful question. Yeah, I mean, the bad news for Ryan is that I know the answer. And so if he gets it wrong, I'm gonna have to tell him. Did you know you were coming on a quiz show?

I don't even know. How do you measure sky? Yeah. It's not hectares, right? It's what is it? Yeah, what is the sky, Hank? I don't even really know. Like, we've talked before about where does the sky start?

What unit of measurement would you use? Well, yes. It's gotta be mathematical, right? Because you are right that it's not an area because of how it does not have a plane to it. So it kind of, and in the nighttime, it extends out, you know, roughly 13.7 billion light years. So that's a problem for us.

It's big. There's a lot of sky at night. Yeah, so the thing you would be measuring is angles. So like, is it 180 degrees? Oh, it like it's a less than or more than 100 rad. You're gonna rest on your angles laurels. All right. Yeah.

Okay. You're telling me that the earth is round? Wait a second. No, I mean, yes, but it wouldn't have to be to still measure it in angles. No, no, no, man. I saw this, I saw this YouTube video. Oh, they got into this in detail. I don't like this. This is terrible. No, no, no. Hey, how much of the sky can you see? Well, it depends on where you are. If you were where I am, you can't see 180 degrees because there's mountains where you are. If you were where I am, you can't see 180 degrees because there's mountains all around me.

If there's buildings all around you, of course, you have a similar problem. But if you are on a perfectly flat plane, like say you're in the ocean, on a boat, you can see slightly more than 180 degrees because the earth is round. The higher up you are, the more you can see, the more sky there is.

And then as you take off in a space, in a shuttle, and go farther and farther away, like if you're in a rocket ship going away from Earth, that angle continues to decrease until eventually, the sky is everything except for a tiny dot that is the Earth. So that's how it works. Whoa, it's a lonely. You just blew my mind a little bit.

It's a really lonely. Yeah. Why does the sky look different in certain places? Have you ever been, like, you know, if you go to like Africa? If you look at the sky or that's a different look at sky. That's not what I grew up with in Canada. Yeah. Yeah, well, I live in Montana.

Everybody calls it the big sky state. And I'm like, well, technically, it's the same size. Yeah. Uh, but it does feel bigger. I mean, is that just an optical illusion? The Hanks version makes it makes it terrible license plate. Yeah, no. It does get me in trouble with the fellow Montana. Technically, it's the same sky state.

It's a great license plate header. Yeah. What mine says, I've gotten my sharky out and fixed it. I'm that kind of terrible petent. Yeah. And I just went over to the... I don't want to be pedantic, but I'm pretty sure that's pronounced at damped. You can get it.

It's some musical. Okay, John and Ryan, I have another question. Great. This is from Daisy, who asks Steer Hank and John. I think this is an important question. I just bought a cup of coffee, but I forgot to put milk and sugar in it. Is it socially acceptable to go back into the cafe 10 minutes later to add milk and sugar?

I hate black coffee. Please help me. Not of you can and daisy. No. I have this with bathrooms a lot. Oh. Where I've purchased something recently from a restaurant or some other. I was a customer.

I was recently a customer and I'm coming back for one reason. Right. Because I have ulcerative colitis. Yeah. That's it. Look, look, that's it. Look, I got a special card. You need to let me do that. Yeah. Yeah.

Which bathroom is most scary? I need to make do a procedure in there. That is going to, I always think that, like, Daisy, this is a good question, but I always think that you've got to just drive it like you own it. Like, you just got to go back and you just do it. If you don't act like there's anything wrong, they won't either.

Mm-hmm, right. This is a con man 101. Is what, like Ryan Reynolds is teaching. This is the short con. This is an easy one. I mean, that's the bathroom. It's like, how yes I'm using the bathroom on a paying customer.

Yeah, right. And most folks are conflict diverse. You know, most people don't want to engage in conflict. Most people have not been trained in conflict resolution. So if you got that under your belt, you're kind of, you're covered on both ankles. Yeah, I think I think I just go back and do it. Where do we get trained in conflict resolution?

Is that something that happens like in year two of Hollywood celebrity? They're like, hey, so we got a course you need to take. God, that'd be nice. Boy, how do you do that? course you need to take. That'd be nice boy. I did study conflict resolution and this helped. I know some working actors who have obviously not had conflict resolution. No, no, no, no.

Yeah, I feel like conflict resolution is like a life hack. Yeah. They should teach that in school because I took a workshop in it when I was in my late 20s. And man, I have used that every day in my life since. Wow. Yeah. But it does speak to how profoundly conflict avoidant we are that we think to ourselves, oh, I really shouldn't go back to this cafe where I bought a cup of coffee 10 minutes ago

because I am so worried about the potential conflict of people thinking I'm pouring milk into coffee I didn't buy here. Yes. And John, by the way, would never do that. You would never go back into a coffee place. No, because I'm so conflict-avoidant, which is now I'm realizing that what I need is conflict resolution, workshop, it. Yeah. I'm just going there, mirror empathizing validates someone and you'll make their day anewars. Yeah. Yeah. Just going there mirror empathize and validate someone and you'll

make their day on yours. Okay. We're going to now we're going to have to start charging for Rhyme mental tours. I was going to say I feel like I just got it. I feel like I feel like I don't need to go to the trading now. I just mirror empathize and what's the last one? Valid. Valid. Yeah. It's great. I'm telling you to life hack. It's, it's been, yeah. They're used to life hack. Just thinking about this makes me nervous. Why? Because I'm imagining a conflict that I might be in. Oh. Well, do you imagine a conflict,

I can fuck you through it. It's the easiest thing in the world. You're gonna mirror empathizing. I'm validating someone. So like if, you know, if John says, Hey, I'm really pissed off, like, you know, you came back into my coffee shop and you went and you used the bathroom and you didn't flush the toilet. You know, you're not even a paying customer.

You can be like, what, you can mirror that? You can say, yeah, I came in your red coffee shop and I did this thing. I'm very sad. I imagine that that did not feel good for you. I mean, I imagine this, so, you know, a lot of people paying customers, people waiting here and stuff like that, now the bathroom stuff. And then you've got, and I can, I mean, that's when you say, I can customers, people waiting here and stuff like that, now the bathroom's on that. And then you've got, and I can imagine that would be a difficult bridge on. And I end, and you know, so you're not really, in a weird way, you're not like admitting you've done anything wrong.

All you're doing is sharing their perspective, mirroring it back to them, invalidating that it is viable. That's a viable perspective. Real thing. Yeah. And then you've done, you really actually don't even have to be like, I did something wrong

or say something like that because you didn't necessarily your experience is yours and there's his theirs. Wow. I didn't know I was going to get people in the process of therapy today, but I'm very grateful that I did. I didn't know. You will cut that whole section out of this. I promise you.

Oh, are you, no, we won't. Oh. We won't even cut you telling us to cut it. Yeah. Good. That's the, that's the best. I love you guys, rolls. Ryan, I have a, I have a Ryan specific question for you. This one comes from Hank who asks,

what, what are you doing on our, what are you doing on our podcast? How, well, why did you come on our podcast? Oh, nice of you, but it's very surprising. Yeah. Big fan of both of you. John, you were very kind to chat with me a couple years ago on a football matters

conversation among other things Your dulcet voice just soothes me. Yeah, this was this was before it became public knowledge that Ryan and his friend Rob have acknowledge that Ryan and his friend Rob have become the owners of Rexham, a team that plays in Wales in the 5th Division of English Soccer. And we talked about the perils and opportunities of loving lower tier English football teams. Wow, that is a weird thing to have in common with a person, but love it for you both. But everything John said resonated. And every piece of advice you gave me, I feel like I've put you good use. I'm gonna digitally pat myself on the back here,

literally doing it. You can hear it. That's the best part. That's great. I took every piece of advice you gave me, and I think I put it to good use. That is been incredible. And then, you know, and I think I put a few ds. That is been incredible. And then, you know, and I'm a massive Anthropocene fan.

I love the old Langsign episode that I think you ever heard that one? Yeah, of course. Old Langsign, I guess. That one, I kind of say, just pound for pound, I think it's a 24 minutes long. It's probably the most emotional podcast I've ever heard. I think it's a 24 minutes long. It's probably the most emotional podcast I've ever heard. I think I've sent it to everyone. Basically any any hot shot actor I've ever worked with. Well thank you for doing that. That's very kind of you. It just kind of, yeah, that one just just gets me. And then Hank, a big huge fan of everything you do in, in, in, in, to promote and, and, and, and genuinely care for science. I, I, uh, I have to say I'm, I'm, I'm a huge fan. I know that this took a much more serious tone

than you were thinking. I was just gonna crap all over you both, but that's just not gonna happen. That'll, uh, wait till we stop recording. Uh, and so, so I'm a huge fan of both of you guys. And then I often like, I'll just find myself, you know, I'll walk, like I'll walk the kids to school. I'll be on my way back and I'll be listening to one of you guys doing something. And I often think of myself like, how do they come up with the filling order here? Like, Hank and John, John and Hank,

like if they added a rooster, it could be John Hankcock, which would be a good name for a show. You know, like, that's a great idea. I'd go down, like, yeah, right? Yeah, yeah, but then you're stuck with a rooster. Well, I mean, they only live so long. Yeah, and he's probably a method actor and he'll never get out of character. And he's just a regular dude.

He's constantly trying to act like a rooster. It is a source of considerable consternation, the question of, is it Hank and John or John and Hank? I think that Hank and I have somewhat different worldviews on the topic. Look, I think Hank and John just sounds better. And it's alphabetical. I think that's an argument in favor of it.

I was born first. So I tend to think of, I tend to, I have to confess, think of it as, as John and Hank, but to mirror empathize and validate, I'm hearing that Hank, you feel like Hank and John sounds better. Yeah. And I can absolutely understand why that would make you feel more comfortable. Uh-huh.

And I understand why from your perspective, that is important. That's textbook, John. Thank you. Text book. No, I mean, you're on. Yeah, we like to be in freak out there. I'm jumping for joy right now. That was really amazing. You've really you've really changed my life. I This is it moving forward. This is my only strategy. I think I think I got it for me this seed and nurture all your relationships

There you go. Wow. I hate and John sounds better. I gotta say I don't I don't I don't mean Wow, I hate and John sounds better. I gotta say I don't I don't I don't mean Picolaine hair conflict. Reson is like more work more work for me. Yeah personally Yeah, it doesn't suggest preference in any way super fun, but but Hank and John just just rolls off the tongue Over easy. Well now we have we have what we have one additional vote. There are only three of us So I guess we know that is also really rolls off the tongue. So does John Hancock. And it's not hard to get a rooster in Montana. No.

They're available. I have a rooster. He's a, I'm wearing one right now. I've already got one and I can't believe that I failed to name the rooster John Hancock. What a massive mistake. Yeah, fail. He's failed. Oh, but no, the kids have already named the rooster. Soitchcock. What a massive mistake. Yeah, fail, he's failed. Oh, but no, the kids have already named the rooster. So there's no going back from it.

Oh, you actually have a rooster? He does, yeah. I do, yeah, no. I have chickens, but I don't have a rooster. Why would you do that to yourself? This isn't just like- If you get to a certain level, you're supposed, if you have a certain number of chickens,

you're supposed to have one rooster. I don't know why, but that's the rule. That's the rule. My parents said chicken rules. So, yeah, some sort of poultry sexism. Yeah, I'm going to play there, I think. Okay. Yeah, I don't know how it works. I shouldn't say that they're really my chickens when they live with my parents.

Oh, I was wondering. I was like, you don't have chickens. No, well, you got your next door. No, well, they are next door. Join ownership. I look at the chickens all day long. Yeah, your kids take care of the chickens. They're kind of. I can see them from where I'm speaking to you.

Chickens are good for kids though, because it gives us, like, the responsibility of the kids. Yeah, they're more working, you'd think. Oh, yeah. Yeah, no, they're great. I think they're great for kids, and they're not inside, which is really nice for me. They can be.

We had them inside for a while though, when they were babies. Oh, yeah. And that was junkie-sucking. I mean, yeah. Good thought. Well, some people put their chickens and diapers and have inside chickens, but that's never gonna be us. Wow, because they're crop factories.

I mean, they're literally like, they just never stop pooping. Yeah. Yes, a lot of my time is spent in very close proximity with chicken poop wearing an N95 mask. Yeah. Right. That's. I want an N100 with just no air at all. And I just just just say. Have you knew chicken? Sure. So here's a weird thing about what it's like to be you. I went through the deer, hangin' John questions in box, which has existed since, I think, So here's a weird thing about what it's like to be you. I went through the Dear Hanging John questions in box, which has existed since, I think 2016.

And I just searched for your name, and we had about 20 questions that referenced you specifically. So inside of this little episode of Dear Hanging John, I've got to sprinkle a few with those. And here's the first one, it is from Abby, who says, dear Hank and John, and I had no idea that Ryan Reynolds

was going to be listening to this question, so keep that in mind. I know the difference between Ryan Reynolds and Ryan Gosling, but every time I try to picture one of them in my head, I just like, I see their faces blurred together into a hybrid Ryan, possibly named Ryan Gosnalds. Is there a solution to this problem?

Abby. You know, it's fun. Years ago, I used to play Fast and Loose a little bit more on Twitter these days. I'm a little bit reserved. Yeah. But I remember this question like this came up. It said, I can't tell the difference between Ryan Reynolds and Ryan Gosling. And I answered the question.

I said that I would never do this today. But I answered it. I said, well, the difference is easy to spot. Ryan Gosling has blonde hair. And Ryan Reynolds is a... Oh, good. And would we get a vote for the episode? Don't worry about that.

What that word was, everyone. Yeah, I'll be fine. I have always remembered it this way. Ryan Reynolds is a Canadian and Ryan Gosling is a very small goose. I don't have a hard time with this because I closed my eyes and I picture Ryan Reynolds starring in the notebook and it all I'm like, nah, that wouldn't have. Ryan Reynolds starring in the notebook and it all, I'm like, nah, that wouldn't have. No way. No, no, that would have failed horrendously. Yeah, I guess that's a, it is a different vibe, huh? Yeah. Well, you would have brought a very different energy. It would have, I don't know if it would have been a better film or a worse film,

but it would have been a different film. It would have been worse. I promise you, it would have been unwatchable. It would have been, the theater tears would have if it would have been unwatchable, it would have been, if the year's would have just said, how many walkouts today? 100%. Well, it would have been funnier. I mean, well, you just bring a different energy to it. Yeah.

Did you start your career on Disney's The Mickey Mouse Club, or was that Ryan Gosling? I was Ryan Gosling. You were suffering from the same issue that Abby had. Wow. Okay. Yeah, nope. That was me at all. I thought I did start it like Ryan Gosling, you were suffering from the same issue that Abby had. Yeah, nope, that was me. I did start, like, run Gosling, I did start at a very young age. I didn't do anything as sort of notable as the Mckick-Mouse Club.

I did like a bad sort of soap opera for teens called 15 for Nickelodeon. And I remember they paid 250 bucks a week and I was like, I thought I was the richest man on earth because I also had a paper root, which I wasn't allowed to quit. And this paid like three times with my paper root. Papers, it was incredible. I mean, and also, you know, a little less physical activity, but also in addition to that,

you, I now think you're very old. Mm-hmm. I am. I just, now I think you're 85 years old. Yeah, when did paper routes stop? When did you have a paper route in 1961? Is that still a thing in Canada? I had a paper route in, it would have been 1990. Oh my God.

I would guess, I was born in 1976, I am currently 45 years old. I feel like I'm having a moment right now where I'm Bella and I'm saying to Edward Cullen, how older are you? And Edward Cullen's like, I'm 16. And I'm like, how long have you been 16? And then Edward Cullen's like, a while. Oh God.

He just, he just throw down a Twilight reference. Good Lord. Yeah, no, I have the, I have the whole movie memorize. You need any Twilight quits, I'm your man. Thank you. Thank you for telling me all of us about 15, by the way. I'm excited to look it up. I'm excited to go watch some 15 clips on YouTube.

We're so, so welcome. Yeah, it was fair. Yeah, it was good time. So that was it. That was to me. That was a big, big job. Yeah. I was, I'd made it.

And then you only did like a year later, basically quit acting altogether and try to finish high school and I ended up working as a bus boy and working at a grocery store called Safeway. And those are the jobs that I think I look back at. It's probably one of the most fun jobs I ever had was working at Safeway. Oh, that is not how I feel about my time at Walmart.

No, you worked at Walmart. Yeah. Also not how I feel about my time at Walmart. No? You worked at Walmart. Yeah. Also, not how I feel about my time at Steak and Shake. Ooh, wow. Yeah. Steak and a shake. Yeah. Did they make steak shakes?

No, no, and they don't actually make steaks either. No. They just make hamburgers. It's a little misleading. And I never thought about that. It was a great place to, I worked the graveyard shift, and so I got a lot of good stories out of it. Yeah, it was just, it was hard. Hard work, hard work.

Yeah. Who do you get? Who do you usually, like, do people ever walk up to you, Ryan and say something because they recognize you, but they recognize you as the wrong person? Oh, I mean, yeah, I get this, or do they always recognize you as you? No, there's a pizza place in the East Village in New York that that I've been going to for years that they they believe I'm Ben Affleck and I've never corrected I mean, yeah, I have a few things like that. Yeah, if you don't do a good job of correcting people immediately it becomes a situation where you can never correct. Oh, you can't do it after that. Yeah, I'm kind of like, yeah, I feel like it would be, it would not go over well if I, you know, revealed. Well, and that's, yeah, they've been telling their friends

for so long that Ben Affleck comes in all the time and they're gonna have to like, like issue a correction. Yeah, that's no good. And I don't, I also don't accept anything, like they're not giving me free peep that based on this background. I do everything normal like everybody else.

They just think, come, then Aflac can, you know, they'll ask how JLo is great. You know, pizza, all five guys. Because we're all of the US weekly news comes from. Yeah, they're just, you're the main source for Ben Aflac related, yeah, US weekly news. Incorrectly leaking information. But I think what I think makes it so believable with him is that I look mildly sort of put out.

Sure. But it's actually their asking me again about my life and the movies and I sort of look like, they're like, I don't get it. When I leave, I think the sort of thing out, Ben Affleck's used by us. They are questions. Now you're real, Ben Affleck's reputation. Now you're really been at Netflix reputation. Yeah, I got to be more chipper. Yeah, you've got somebody else on the line here.

You got to watch out. Yeah, I got to take care of it. Okay, I've got an acting question that is for, I think all of us, because as I don't know if you'll know this, but I am also an actor, because I had a cameo in the fault in our stars that was cut from the film due to performance issues. Oh no, oh no.

I've seen it. It's in the deleted scenes. It's not good. I understand why they cut it. I love you, John. You could fill a thousand gymnasiums with writers who've been cut from movies. I mean, we're so bad. We're so bad.

Yeah. Anyway, so this question is from Ergen who writes, dear John and Hank and Ryan, yesterday I had an audition and although I had prepared in advance, when I got there, I realized that I really wasn't prepared and I completely forgot everything I knew and I seriously bombed the audition and today I am overwhelmed with mortification and can't stop thinking through everything I should have done better. Mostly I feel as though I made a humiliating first impression on people whose opinions really matter to me. Any advice on how to forgive myself for this screw up and move forward?

Doesn't rhyme with sturgeon. Bergen. Bergen? Bergen? Bergen. I did it with sturgeon. Bird. Virgin. Bergen. I did it right. I did it right the first time. Bergen. Oh, man.

I mean, auditions are horrible. Yeah, auditions are terrible places. Because like, it's just straight up evaluation. It's not even observation. It's just right evaluation. Like at any time you're being evaluated by somebody, it's an active possibility. So I, yeah, I feel for you, Bergen, I understand that. And that's I couldn't tell you. 80% of the auditions I ever did, I bombed. And the other 19% were awful.

So I don't, you know, it's just that's just the nature of the beast. You just see you gotta get comfortable. I would say get comfortable with rejection with lots and lots of virgin. I always wonder like, you know, like lately, there's been a lot of talk. I mean, at least I've seen one that exposed to a lot of talk because I guess my algorithms, but of like method actors. And he's wondering, how method actors audition? Like, did you read that same profile that I read? Oh, yes.

I did. Yes, I did. Yeah, I did read that profile. And I worked with some method actors. And I do understand both sides. If it I'm going to understand that one's process is one's process. But the issue I sometimes take with method acting is that, OK, now your process has to be all of our process.

Right, right. And lunch, we're gonna be like, I'm gonna be like scooping out some Greek salad from the buffet table and you're still gonna give me to Harry Ibal across the way because your character doesn't like my character. I mean, it's just insane. Right, it's just insane.

Now I'm here. Yeah. You've brought me in. This is not a choice that only Now I'm here. Yeah. You've brought me in. This is not a choice that only affects you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That would not have imagined that. That's the thing I always find out. But it's, but I, I, I would imagine having failed spectacularly as an actor myself that it is really hard for some people to feel like they are inside of, of the character. And if they can't turn that off, that must be difficult for them.

But you're absolutely right. Like it affects other people. And that's what's so hard about the collaborative environment of making a play or a movie or whatever is that it is. Unless you're making a one-man show that you're also directing, it is an inherently collaborative process. Well, yeah, it's also part of what's so wonderful

about it, not that I know. I've just watched a lot of my friends are in like theater and it's just so like, the opportunity to lean on each other is really great, but it does mean that everybody has to be there to lean on. And the thing that is brought up in this question, and I think is really pointing, is like,

you've identified what actually feels bad about this, which is that a lot of people who you respect, you are imagining that they are thinking less of you. And that may be, to some extent, true, but probably it's much less true than it feels to you. Like, probably everybody in that room has bombed an audition. And they've certainly seen lots of people bombbed auditions, or whether or not you actually

bombed it, you know, perform less well than they had anticipated they would. And so they are probably thinking about it a lot less than you are. Well, I've also spent a lot of time on the other side of that, you know, where I've produced and produced and you're in these auditions. And I can only speak to the experience that I've been within the rooms that I've been in but myself the cast director of the director any of these additional producers or writers in the room as well we are all desperately rooting for these folks that are coming in and bearing their soul in our heart and we all sort of understand how challenging it is like I mean I know I work really hard to make sure that the person I'm reading is extremely comfortable.

But I remember lots of auditions where I had an audition. One of the first ones I had was for a cast and director and he never looked up. Like he never looked up at me. It was such a lot. And it's actually, it goes full circle because I guess about three months later, I got this pilot for a sitcom. I loved doing sitcoms. So one of the best jobs I ever had.

Live audience, lots of fun, lots of writing in the moment, which I always love. And I remember, we did this pilot. The pilot was okay, but I loved the role I had. I remember this same guy came up to me and said, I would love to have a meeting. Wow, at some point. And I said, oh no, we met.

And I was like, no, we met on a project. It was called Enemies. And it was a... I could comment and I read for you. And I was three weeks ago, look at your partner or whatever you had. And he didn't, and he remembered. And I remember that was just that.

That was, well, maybe he was having a real bet. Now I'm being empathetic to the unimpathetic guy. This is my problem. Yeah, he may have been. He did. He did. And go and trip. Everyone's got their little bag of rocks.

They're carrying our things. Which reminds me that this podcast is brought to you by everybody's little bag of rocks. Yeah. Everybody's little bag of rocks. We all got them. We got them. And we don't know where they are.

And sometimes they just rub us. And we didn't even know that they were there. Yeah. Yeah. And that is not know where they are. And sometimes they just rub us. And we didn't even know that they were there. Yeah. And that is not comfortable. Wonderful sponsor. Great sponsor. Very appreciative for their support.

Of course, today's podcast is also sponsored by Aviation Gin. Aviation Gin. It's my number one source of gin. Oh. You looking for a beautiful smooth gin in an open checkbook. Well, hey, maybe Asian gin is the sponsor of this podcast. That's the show.

Spongebob is also brought to you by Ryan Gosling's conflict resolution course. It's available on the Masterclass. And of course, today's podcast is brought to you by Ben Affleck's favorite pizza joint. Ben Affleck's favorite pizza joint. And things are going great with JLo. Thanks for asking. When I first started out, we had an improv comedy group. We used to do fake pharmaceuticals.

There's a great name. Are you tired of feeling your life? Are you tired of blinking? Well, maybe it'll be like Amper theorists for you, you know, and then like the list of side effects are always so hard because they would speak so fast But but I always loved that one of the side effects would be play color stool Make a slow to spontaneous dance or play color school And they always they always try to end it on one that isn't dev.

Yeah, I always find that so funny. And those ads where they squeeze death in right in the middle, as if it's sort of like one of the most interesting things that can happen as a result of taking some ball. Ooh. I'll just close this right back. Wait, what? Close this thing? Oh.

We have a project for awesome message also. From Mori, in Hyatt'sville, in Hyatt'sville, Maryland, I'm not sure, to Greta and Toby. Hey, look, you guys, your name is on a podcast. Hank and John, thank you for making a podcast that I can share with people in my life and generally just making the world a better place. Ryan, we have a project for Rosm is a charity event and people can buy little sponsorships

for donations. So thank you, Moray, for providing sponsorship. Yeah, right. What an episode you've prepared. Yes. I want to ask you another Ryan specific question, if I might. This one is, I think, A plus plus solid gold. It's from anonymous who writes,

Dear John and Hank, although not bad anonymous, Dear John and Hank, I am faced with a conundrum. I have fallen in love with a really wonderful man and we are engaged to be married. There is just one problem. His name is Ryan Reynolds. Oh my God. Now, I don't want to be mean is Ryan Reynolds. Oh my god. Now, I don't want to be mean to Ryan Reynolds, the famous movie actor, but my Ryan is the

better Ryan. Oh, anonymous, if only you'd known. Wow. My Ryan is the better Ryan. Regardless, I now have had a two-year lovely relationship in which I have had to explain. No, not that Ryan Reynolds many many times. And now I realize that I am signing up for a lifetime of it. I'm not gonna let this hold me back from the marriage, but any advice on how to handle a lifetime of explaining that I am not married to a very famous Canadian would be welcome anonymous. Wow, I was so pleased when I came across this. I will say this. And on a moose. I will say this, you know, culture, the cultural landscape

moose facts, you know, so I'm on a sabbatical right now. Like I'm not shooting movies for another year and a half. No one's going to know who the hell I am in like an hour. So I think you're also like let's be grateful for a second here. Not because you're marrying a guy named Ryan Reynolds, but like it could be so much worse. She could be marrying a guy named Glenn Mussolini or Shirley Wayne Gacy or something. Like, this would be horrible. And at least, this is far as we know I'm not a murderer. That is very true. In my younger years, I knew in Chicago a guy named Lance Armstrong and what a journey He's been on because when I knew him. He was like yes, it's me Lance Armstrong not the tour de France champion But now he's like yes, it's me Lance Armstrong not the disgrace tour de France champion

But I often think about this because I have such a common name and there are so many John Greens and I often feel like I'm inconveniencing for some of them. And I do feel a little guilty about it. Like there's a John Green who's a wonderful author of graphic novels and comic books. And he had to change, he changed his author name to John Patrick Green recently and immediately hit the New York Times bestseller list and I was like, oh, well now, now maybe I need to change my name and turn. John Copernicus Green, you got to just bring it up.

Let's go for it. I do. Yeah. No, my parents of course gave me the middle name Michael as part of their efforts to make sure that I was as anonymous as possible. This kid loved possible. Oh. Miss, you know, this kid loved privacy. Yeah. Yeah.

And then you're like, no, I think instead I will become the most famous John Green. Yeah. Yeah. How is, are there any other Hank Green? Oh, yeah. Actually, because I read this question yesterday, I looked it up and there's a number of them. And also, this, I don't know, this is actually what it was. I was on Twitter and somebody tagged me, there is a Hank Green who is the VP of Food and Beverage's

at AMC theaters. Wow. And he's giving a talk soon. And so that's why I, why I, why he came across my dashboard. Good for him. AMC Food and Beverage's. Yeah, movie chain. Yeah, yeah.

I thought I was talking and beverages. Yeah. Movie chain. Yeah. Yeah. I thought I was talking to him today. That's why I that's why I wanted to come on the podcast. I'm going to sell my products to AMC theater. This doesn't work. I just just tried to shore up that relationship with Henry. Head of food and beverage. Relationship business guys. Have you heard any of the other Ryan Reynoldses? Have you ever come across another Ryan Reynolds? Oh, not too. I mean, I'm a Ryan Rodney Reynolds. That's very ring.

My middle name is, is, is Rodney. I was definitely a guy who drives a panel man. I've met, I've never met a Ryan Reynolds, but there was, I knew that there's a Ryan Reynolds who was a big time of cultural momentary. I think he played the student's tuners. And he played maybe 10 years ago or so. He's really good. He's probably still really good just not playing the tuners anymore. Otherwise, no, I don't think I've ever met a Ryan Reynolds. Well, there is one who is about to get married. Well, I think that, I this question was from

a long time ago. So perhaps they perhaps they're happily married now. I hope so too, yeah. I did recently join LinkedIn and there are quite a number of Ryan Reynolds on there as well. Wow. Also, my social media handles are van city Reynolds, which is from Vancouver because all my name was taken on every platform. So I just went with van.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, for some reason I always thought that that was, I have seen this handle and I thought that that was some reference to a large city of vans. Like just out in the desert, just a bunch of vans hanging out, like a Pixar movie. Yeah, like a, like a ten city, but it's a, yeah, of a, but vans. No, yeah, it's not like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, No Madland sequel that he really anticipated no Madland fans. I'm doing.

Yeah, I thought the cliffhanger ending was incredible. Right. I mean, I really I don't know which way they're going to go with it. I can't believe they said that whole movie was just an ad for part. It's a really good movie. No, I don't even I don't I don't usually like good movies like properly good movies, but I really liked that one. Yeah, I don't like like good movies, like, properly good movies, but I really like that one. Yeah, I don't like to learn of anything,

and I felt like I learned watching that one. Yeah, but I was a better person when the credits rolled. Yeah, a little more emotionally engaged, for sure. 100%. Yeah. Totally. I have no idea what you guys are talking about. You've never seen No Matter Dance. You've never seen it. It won like 73 Oscars. Look, I don't watch, you guys are talking. You never see no matter the answer. It won 73 Oscars.

Look, I don't watch, you don't watch a lot of good movies. If there isn't an MTV movie award best kiss, and it Hank has nothing to do with it, he doesn't even have it. Correct, correct. You've uncovered my secret. Yeah. This is how I make my decision.

It's my, the most prestigious award that I've ever received is is an MTV. That's as high as I've gotten so far. Got that popcorn. Got that popcorn. Uh, well, I think I actually had to pay my own $300 to get to get the popcorn. Well, look, oh, got the popcorn. Come on.

Yeah, that's hard for that. I think I I don't want to I don't want to I don't want to be quoted on that because I might be wrong, but that's my memory. All right. We have another question from Kelsey who writes deer, Ryan, and John, and Hank. Who decides which books become movies? Is there like somebody employed at every major film company whose only job is to read books and decide whether or not it should become a movie? Books and blockbusters. Kelsey. Oh, God. It was not simple. You've asked the right group of people. Yeah. I'll say, um, boy, I do know that they must have the sickest of skin because like, it's it's not too often that, you know,

present company excluded that, you know, you that works out, right? Oh, no, it almost never works out. Even present company included. out even present company included. I don't know. What happens usually Kelsey is that a either an actor or a producer, somebody who puts movies together usually options the rights to make a book into a movie and then with those rights either works with a movie studio or with a production company of some kind to try to get a script written and then they try to get a movie studio to greenlight the script, perhaps already having found a director or some actors to help package it together as a unit and then the movie gets made. So there are so many steps along the way in my experience

anyway. Yeah. Lots of people make decisions. And like it's down to so many different people. Sometimes even then it doesn't happen. I remember there was a book by John Kennedy tool called a Confederacy of Dances and that was adapted six ways from Sunday. Every person was attached to different points. It all came together with directors and budgets and all that kind of stuff. And then what always fall apart. And I think it always fell apart because like the principles involved would then read the book and go, Oh, we can't do this. What are we? What are we?

Same. So that's yeah. This gave me a movie. Yeah. But yeah, that's a great example where I think like the first actor associated with the Confederacy of Dundesys project was Paul Newman. You know, like, was that true?

I think so. And at some point, I know Will Farrell was attached to it. Will Farrell drew Barrymore was attached to it. I mean, every comic actor of the last 50 years has been attached to it at some point. John Candy was attached to it. Yeah, oh, and he would have been amazing. But again, it is unfilmable. so I think that is perhaps the underlying issue it is unfilmable and also problematic in occurring their curtains I mean just

hugely prolly yeah yeah yeah yeah with my books I mean I've had it usually when when something gets greenlit and when the studio starts to spend a bunch of money, it happens. But my first novel, Looking for Alaska, was something like 20 or 25 days away from the start of production and was largely cast and people had moved their families to the place where it was gonna film.

And then it got canceled at the very last second. And I think that happens, but what usually happens is that somebody options the book. They try really hard to get a good script, and it just never works. And that happens, that's, I mean, 95% at least of the stuff that gets option never gets made. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. It's also just so expensive. I mean, think about like how much, like what represents success for a book a lot of times is if it reaches say 50,000 people that's a very successful book but a film even a small budget film cannot reach 50,000 people and make money. No, there's a lot to consider this game of it's just very different. All right, we should probably get to the all-important news from Mars and AFC Wimbledon, which I'm not sure that strictly speaking, Ryan needs to join us for, but I do, before we get to the news from AFC Wimbledon, and before we say thank you and goodbye to Ryan, I do want to say that down there in the fifth year of English football, where AFC Wimbledon was not long ago,

just a decade ago, AFC Wimbledon was trying to get out of the national league, which is one of the hardest things to do in English football because there's only two promotion slots. Yes. And there's very tricky. And Rexim, I believe, is currently in fifth. They've been working their way up. They had a rough start to the season. If I, if I remember correctly, Ryan, and they've been working their way up, so very correct. What's the what's the current rexome vibe in mood? I would say that the mood is, the mood is never going to be good enough until we're promoted. But overall, I think that this has been embraced by the community.

I think we've understood from the get-go, and certainly from talking to you, John, who was one of the things to talk about about, was like really kind of making sure that this was an in tandem project with both the club and the community around it. So it's been great. I mean, for us, it's been one of the most satisfying, wonderful things that I've ever been involved with. And also the most excruciating football

will quite literally just chew and bowl blow bubbles with your soul and it's a Terrible feeling and that rollercoaster ride is something that I I am still struggling with like I actually struggle to watch the matches Sometimes because I just find it that yeah physically painful. Yeah, I'm I'm physiologically inside out by the time it's done like my bones are hanging outside of my ears and head and my spine is somewhere across the room. It's just an awful experience. So yes, it's both a curse and it's the beautiful game. You know, I understand why it is that.

So it's a, yeah, I'm very, very lucky to be involved with Brexit. That's awesome. Well, we will be watching Rexam throughout the rest of the season and hoping that promotion is on the cards for Brexit. That's awesome. Well, we will be watching Rexim throughout the rest of the season and hoping that promotion is on the cards for them. See, I ask how Wimbledon's doing right now. How is Wimbledon? Well, you know, there, that's a storied project as well, which I... Yeah, it's amazing. They just won a football game, which is wonderful. Yes. A big and a big relief. I watched the game on my phone. We were playing Ackrington Stanley,

which is one of those team names that just sounds absolutely made up. Yes, we were playing Ackrington Stanley away up there in the north of England where the sky is very close to the ground. And I would say the wind was averaging about 55 miles per hour. The rain was lashing horizontally throughout the game. And from the moment it started, I was like,

this has Neil Mill written all over it. We have no chance of winning this game. And then we did the most disastrous thing for us this season, which is that we scored. And this season, when Wimbledon score first, they have lost almost every game. And when they, when they give up the first goal, they are much more likely to win. And so the moment we scored, I was like, oh, this is a catastrophe. But then, then we scored again. And I was like, I don't even know how this feels. We haven't had a two goal lead all season. And it felt great.

It was extremely enjoyable. And then we ended up winning the game. So thank you to Luke McCormick and Ayubis All for giving me a wonderful, a wonderful week. And now we are way up in the, we are way up in 17th place in the league one. Well out of the relegation zone for the moment, which is just awesome. League one. That's amazing. No, I one. I know. That's no joke. I know, get there. I know.

We're on our way. It's impossible. The third tier. League one. I know. It's been a sharp learning curve for me. All of the linga. Yeah.

The fact that League one is the third tier could not be more confusing. Yes, that is true. It's not even the second one. It'll make it easy. No, not at all. Hey Hank, what's the news from Mars? The news from Mars is I feel the same way

about the James Webb Space Telescope as you guys do about football. And so I am, my bones are on the outside of my body. The James Webb Space Telescope has met its rocket. They are friends now. And they're gonna hang out for a pretty long time until they're in space. So that's terrifying.

And the launch is currently scheduled for the 22nd and it's all I can think about. No offense, Mars, but I'm stuck on the James Webb Space Telescope frame. If you're wondering this sort of schedule of events, the launch is a scary time, but it remains scary for about, about a month, but really like six months even. So two weeks is the scariest time, then a month, then six months. So if you get through two weeks, then that's amazing. That's the amount of time it takes

for the space telescope to unfold into its full configuration. If it is unable to do that for some reason, it will not work. And there has a lot of moving parts, but they've all been tested extensively. And then a month is when it is in its stable orbit, where it arrives at the place where it's gonna live for the whole of its mission.

And then six months is when it actually starts to take pictures of space. So there's a long period of time of calibration after it's sort of is like open and on and doing its work. But we get what's called first light in six months after launch. So it's a long period of sort of nerves, but the first two weeks are the most nervous time. Well, I should actually say that the launch is probably the most dangerous time. But so that's all I'm thinking about. I love you Mars.

I'll be back soon. Yeah, I watched an 11 minute video about the, how the James Webb Space Telescope is going to launch an unfurl and everything. And my palms were drenched with sweat as I was watching it and thinking about it. It's, it's a lot. It's just, it's so many years of the hard work of really

smart, talented, dedicated people. And we just hope it goes well. John Ryan, thank you for podcasting with me. Thank you to everybody who sent in your questions to hankanjohnatimeal.com. You never know when an old one's going to get dug up. That's right. Because Ryan Reynolds is going be on my cast. Indeed. And Ryan, thank you so much for joining us. And it's such a pleasure to be with you. Before we go, I have to tell you,

my kids made me promise that I would say that they love free guy. I love it too. Yes. I have to love it because I've seen it seven times, but they really, really love it. You know how kids love to re-watch movies, and it is like their number one choice right now.

So thank you, thank you for free guy. Henry and Alice say hi. That means the world to me. Tell your kids that it's the world to me. I will, because I thank you Henry Nelson. And I, that's yeah, my blood's winning. Here's winning that one. We worked really, really hard on that one.

It was kind of an antidote to the insane four or five years that we had in the last little while. And yeah, I thank you for that. I really appreciate that. It's a really fun movie. Thanks for making it. Alright, thank you for having me. Also, hit me up anytime someone cancels last night.

Alright, we will. Because you're free all the time. Well, no, no, I actually have that sort of thing with Fat Jimmy Fallon. And I always love it. Yeah. So, I'm like, guys actually have that sort of thing with fat Jimmy Fallon. I don't always love it. Yeah. I'm like, you guys can't swim. I like, I believe I live in New York.

I'm not sure. Oh, yeah, that's fun. It makes it fun. Awesome. Yeah. It's probably a good advice for Bergen, our auditioning friend, to not think about it too much. Some of you show up, I don't know where he just goes.

Yeah. And you're awesome. Yeah, you're not too much. That's right. And if you have our contact info if you need us for anything, I don't know what you would need us for. But, I mean, if you ever need somebody to get cut out of a movie, I'm your guy. I needed you in the past, so, right?

They're done. We are off now to record our Patreon only podcast this weekend stuff, which you can find at patreon.com slash deerhank and John. That was super fun. That was fun. This podcast is edited by Joseph Tune of Medicine. It's produced by Rosiana Halls-Rohas. Our communications coordinator is Julia Bloom.

Ryan's friend Sophia Travalia helped a lot getting this all put together. So thanks to her. Thank you Sophia. Our editorial assistant is Deboki Chokravarti. The music you're hearing now is by the great Gunnarola and as they say in our hometown, don't forget to be awesome.