Dear Hank & John - 315: Orlampa Raxerati

Episode Date: December 27, 2021

How would you like to be bronzed? How did 2021 go? Where's the Complexly logo exit? What are some first time solo flying suggestions? Hank and John Green have answers!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at [e-mail] us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn

Hello and welcome to Dear Hank and John. Thor's I prefer to think of it dear John and Hank. It's a podcast where two brothers and no Ryan's give you and answer your questions, give you to be advised and bring you all the week's news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon. John, did you know that early on in the history of Jeopardy, one of the little things, the puzzle, it was the movie, a street car name desire. And that was the first Noel. What?

It was the first Noel. Noel, a street car name desire. That doesn't have an L. It was the first puzzle that didn't have an L. The first no L of all of Wheel of Fortune. Did I say Jeopardy? Wheel of Fortune. That was some worse. So for that joke to work, you would have to say Wheel of Fortune

instead of Jeopardy. Which you, you really, I don't know if I think confusing for me. And then secondly, I would have to instantaneously know by a listening experience, not a visual experience, that a street cart name desire is a name of a play that doesn't have an L in it. Yeah, that was a play. That was a joke.

I have, let's just move on to my topic. I have something I'd like to discuss with you Hank. So I want to discuss this with you. How many of you riding the high of that experience all day? That was so bad. Well, that was usually the podcast. No, that when Hank and I were children, we were huge fans of a roast beef restaurant called Rax. R-A-X.

And there are now five Raxes left in America, but I have some interesting and somewhat exciting news in the field of Rax. So for whatever reason, because I guess we are public facing Rax enthusiasts, I have sort of been hooked into a group of people who I like to call the racks a rady. Oh, great. These are hardcore racks fans who define themselves like a lot of very small communities.

It's also really intense. And I received a word over the weekend that while it is still not confirmed on November 22nd, a new corporation filed for its existence, like when you're a baby, you're born, but when you're a corporation, you file. And it is called RACS new carlile. Oh, I die.

Okay, I can't imagine. Not imagine. That this is a good idea. Which implies two Rax enthusiasts that there is a new Rax opening up soon, hopefully, in the suburbs of Dayton, Ohio, which is only two hours from my house in Indianapolis. And this dramatically increases the chances of me actually committing to the bit.

So, so this is, so new carlile is a town. Yeah. And it is outside of Dayton. And it's two hours from your house. Yes. Can you wait until I get back? I think I have to. Also, it's not that much of an inconvenience to not drive to New Carlyle, Ohio.

You're part of the country is absolutely wild. The, leaving between Indianapolis and Dayton, Ohio, there are two large roads, 40 and 70, and they just run parallel to each other the whole way. Yeah. They just, like, which one do you want, whichever? They're not, they're like 30 feet apart. Yeah, it's like which one's better for you.

You can just, it's just how you feel today. There's not going to be a lot of traffic on either of them. I mean, there's like, where Hitler's in Montana. There are 12 fields between these two very, very busy roads. Yeah, I mean, they go to different places. They go to Dayton. Well, I mean, after Dayton, though, they go to different places. It is true that there is arguably too many lanes

of interstate going through Dayton, but after that, they go to very different places. Well, you guys are well connected. Yeah, I mean, where the Indianapolis is the Crossroads of America, Hank. I mean, you look at a picture of it, it does look like that. It looks like the Crossroads of America.

I guess the Crossroads of America now. What is Indianapolis, what is, what is Dayton to Indianapolis? Is it like, is Dayton like Indianapolis's Miami? No, no, like, no, I would say that Dayton is a little bit, and I don't want to, I don't want to offend anybody

from Dayton, but I would say that Dayton is a little bit like Indianapolis's Fort Myers. You know what I mean? Yeah, all right. Yeah, I get that. You get it? Uh huh. Yeah. It's got a little, it's got a little Fort Myers energy but without the beaches. John I'm I've as you might have

expected I'm scrolling around Google maps right now and in between Cincinnati and Dayton which are really close to each other. It right right in the middle is a little town called Middletown. They knew what was going on. It's like that place right between Orlando and Tampa called Oralampa. Is there a place called Oralampa? You made that up. It's real. You made that up.

Every place that's in between Orlando and Tampa is Oralampa. You know you made that up. God, you tricked me for a second. Now I'm googling it and you're going to laugh at me when there is no, there is an, oh, welcome to Orlamp of the tourist attraction that doesn't exist. Hank. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. You tricked me.

And then they tricked you. And then they tricked me. Can you call the new Carlyle Racks people and talk about the cookie situation? Because this is all I want. All you want is that like undercooked chocolate chip cookie. I can still taste it. Yeah, no, it's a good cookie.

I want the little plastic alligator that the kids drinks came in. Yeah, I just looked at them in a cup because we were doing alligators shaped plastic mold. You can get it for 2550 on eBay. I mean, vintage 1984, alligator-rouse, if you can put it plastic. Imagine like explaining to your childhood self,

one day there will be all these computers that are connected to each other. And people will be able to do almost anything through this network of computers and what they'll choose to do is buy and sell childhood racks, alligator cups. Like, if I got one of these, which I will not, I would definitely drink out of it.

Oh yeah, no, they're awesome. They actually, like, they were kind of like the ones that you got at the zoo. Remember how you would always get similar ones? Well, no, the molded wax thing, you mean? Yeah, that came out of the machine. You didn't drink out of those though. They just smell like cow wax.

No, no, no, no. That's where you got your kids drinks from. It was like from molded drinks. Zoo drink. Oh, I forgot that there were characters other than the alligator. The alligator was Uncle Al alligator. Uncle Al, yeah. That's what I searched for.

I remembered that. By the way, I know you love a dad joke. Do you want to know the name of the holding company that owns all the rakses? Oh, God, hit me. It's from raks to riches. Oh, I knew that. I actually knew that.

Well, am I one of these Rax people, John? You might be a member of the Rax Arradi Hank without even noticing it. The three main characters in the Rax lore are Uncle Al alligator, Hooter the Owl, and the fearless frog who is inexplicably orange. Yeah, yeah. And unfortunately, they did not make a Mr. Delicious

that you can suck right out of his head. Yeah. Suck fruit juice out of his head. That would have been great. It occurs to me, for those of you who remember. To us anyone, we are definitely deep in the Raxa Roddy.

Like, you are, no wonder people are letting us know about this. We are, we have come without knowing to get the president, advice president of the RACS. Well, I wouldn't say that, but John, when I was making that video about RACS's doomed advertising campaign, Mr. Delicious,

I reached out to one of the guys who was in the Mr. Delicious documentary. And I was like, hey, I'd like to interview you about Mr. Delicious. And he replied and he was like, that would be amazing. I love that campaign so much. I'm so proud of it. And I thought it was amazing and so good.

And I ghosted him. Because you were like, I was like, I can't have this conversation. If you think Mr. Delicious is a good idea. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I ghosted him. And then I waited a year to make the video. That's how awkward I felt about it. Oh,

So you didn't hurt the guys feelings. Yeah, that makes sense. Well, and the truth is I was gonna say the truth is Maybe it was a good ad campaign, but I it wasn't it wasn't it was really offensive on a lot of levels It was super problematic. It was a big mess. Yeah, it's a big mess, and it really it also killed the for problem matter. It was a big mess. Yeah. It's a big mess. And it really, it also killed the whole childhood Rax War and trying to become like fast food for grownups.

Like what about us, 11-year-olds? They're big thing. Just trying to have a Rax with big sandwich. It was like the guys who owned Rax hated fast food restaurants. Yeah, right. That is what it's like. I'm going and being like, I hate this experience. How do we make it better?

Yeah. I know. No, children. Yeah, it's funny you I'm going and being like, I hate this experience. How do we make it better? Yeah. I know. No children. Yeah, it's funny. You should mention that because while researching the hot dog eating contest for the Anthropocene Reviewed Book, I read two different histories of Nathan's famous hot dog stand. And that was also a big issue with Nathan's famous that like the children of the original

owner were like, we don't want to just sell hot dogs. We want to sell really good, high class, fine dining kind of food. We want to be respected. And that was of course a huge tactical mistake because the people who like Nathan's famous hot dogs, like hot dogs. Yeah. I've seen that mistake made a lot of different times, John. A very similar mistake to that. People make it, people make it all the time in our world,

yeah, all the time. And I want to be on television that turns out it's way worse, but it's more respected. Right. Yeah, exactly. It turns out they have less control. They enjoy their days less and they make less money, but it's a space that sort of like gets a certain amount of respect in where the awards have a lot of cashier. Well, that was the same thing when TV stars always wanted to be movie stars. They were like, I'm not real. I'm not a real, like this is all just the deep insecurity

that we need to work through and understand that everybody's having, everybody has these doubts about themselves and you should just make like long meat and people will love you for it. Be the best racks you can be. Don't try to become the olive garden. They really did. Wow. Okay, you want to do a question because this has been not great. I think we should just do this. I think we should just do this for the rest of our lives. All right. Well, I can't wait to go to Iraq's with you whether in Finland or not. It was Finland. It's a state secret. This is the first question comes from Katie and Ariana because that can happen now.

Dear Hank and John, they ask. My friends's older brother just made her his beneficiary, which obviously led to the discussion of not if we should have his body bronze, but in what position he should be left to stand in for the rest of time. My question is, what would you like to be posed to doing if you were bronzeed after death? I mean, we have to die anyway, Katie and Ariana.

Oh boy. Well, I have to die anyway, Katie and Ariana. Oh boy. Well, I want to be absolutely clear that I do not want to be in a carbonite situation like Han Solo on any level. I don't want to be frozen in bronze, and I especially don't want to be frozen in bronze with a chance of later being reanimated. Well, yeah, well, here's what I want.

No, here's what I want. You're going to upload your consciousness. I just know it. Oh, I mean, if it was an option, I would love to just get. Oh, God. I'd love to just be one of the pieces and Tetris forever. That's me on the L1 that goes to the to the right. And every time one of those comes up, that's me. Has your soul. It has my soul. But then it's only while it's moving, but then when it's secured, then I don't exist anymore. And then when it comes back, as soon as it's in the little window, and it's like, coming up next, that's me again. I'm back. I'm alive once more.

And then you twirl me around, and I'm like, I have experience again. And then then I hit the ground and it's just like, don't exist. And then who sensations just over and over again, it's a real joy for me. I'm looking forward to it. That's not what I was by idea of actual hell. So is that how it works? anyway? No, here's what I want. Cause I've been thinking about this situation with the, with what are they called, the mausoleums? Yeah. And look, I'm not gonna have a mausoleum,

but I'm gonna pretend like I will. And I don't want my body to be in the carbonite, but I want people to think that my body's in the carbonite. I love that. Whereas just like, there's like a inside, they look through the window and it's just like me but I want people to think that my body's in the carbonite. I love that. Where it's just like, inside they look through the window and it's just like me with my hands sticking out and my face like, ah!

But it was just made like three years before I died. I love that. I think that's the right answer. Not being the L-tetra space. Which toucher's piece would you be for eternity, John? Well, I mean, the eyepiece is the obvious one because then you get to make tetrises. Oh, that is fun. But more flash. If I could be realistic about who I am, I would be the square.

I'd be that little O piece. It's just like a little bit of an inconvenience. They turn you around and around, but nothing even happens. Yeah, exactly. They keep it not actually. Yeah, because of my vestibular system, I don't actually like rotation that much. So it's just we just find out the bound for square down or down faster. Those are your two options.

I think it's interesting that you say you're not going to have a mausoleum as if you're going to make the decision. I like, you think my intention. Oh, you're getting the mausoleum for me? Is to get you a mausoleum, whether you want one or not and, and carbonate you. Great. I think I would be great.

And now I, I think it's unlikely that I'll outlive you, but rest assured that should I happen to, I will be building you like a Taj Mahal pyramid level monument. All right. I'm going to pour all of our collected resources. John, I wanted to point. Orans College Fund everything into this amazing mausoleum. Great.

Great. Great. Can it be a underground cave system? That's a great idea. That is a such a cool idea. I love that. But there's going to be a mausoleum in the cave. Right. Right. And all it's all going to be like very Disney looking. It'll just be like spray foam insulation over dirt. like it'll just be like spray foam insulation over dirt. This reminds me of some really important breaking news, which is that Hank Green has signed his will. I did do that after a second.

I was like, did I do it? I forgot. And I, my voice caught and I was like, did I not do it? But I did, I did do it. Oh, it's a big relief. Actually, somebody emailed me a few days ago and said, has Hank signed his will? Because I think about it all the time. Yeah, and he has.

It's just sat there for a long, long time where the guy and we just see him and we were like, hey, can we do this? And I was like, yeah, it's all ready. We like, like these parts. And I was like, they look fine. I'm going to be honest with you, buddy. I think that it's better that I have a will than I have it perfect.

Because I'm not planning on that. You can fix it later. Yeah, you can fix it later, but it's good to have something in place. Yeah, he kept saying we could fix it later. And he also was like, now we're gonna put a copy of this in the vault. Oh, good. The fireproof vault.

And it was like, do you wanna take it home or do you wanna support an art fireproof vault or in your fireproof vault at home? And I was like, I think you should put in your fireproof vault because my fireproof vault is made out of wood. And it's a bookshelf. Yeah. Doesn't have a bookshelf. Yeah.

Doesn't have a front on it. Well, it's interesting. You say that because we have most of our important documents and maybe I shouldn't say this on a podcast, but we have most of our important documents, like pressed into a book. But only we know what the book is. Well, the fire knows where all the books are, John. Exactly. No, none of this is fire proof, but it is a pretty good strategy because if you're like in our house, you might think like, oh, I bet they put some important documents in a book, but you won't think of which one and there are a ton of them, like an actual ton. So there's very little chance of success.

Yeah. All right. Hank, let's move on to another question. This one is from Megan who writes, dear John and Hank, I'm new to the podcast, so I'm listening to the catalog in reverse. Megan, it's a fascinating listen when you start in 2016. There's a lot that Hank and I didn't see coming. You might want to ignore a couple of the things we say. I'm currently on episode 259. That's incredible. Congratulations. It came out in September of 2020, and Hank is discussing how he feels 2021 will go considering the nature and state of the pandemic.

He is very worried about 2021. That being said, how did 2021 go for you compared to your expectations? And do you feel any more hopeful or confident going into 2022? That's a great question. Always worried about next year, Megan. I thought this was a great question, Hank,

because this is our last podcast of 2021. Yeah, I don't know why we didn't have that be part of the whole thing. Probably should have ended with that banger with Brian Reynolds, but no, it's this one. It's this one. So how do you feel going into 2022, Hank, and how was 2021 compared to your expectations? Well, I can't remember my expectations at all. That's one of the great things about being a human is that we forget how we felt about things once we experienced them. And then we retroactively apply how we felt about it to how we thought we would feel about it. Yeah.

So I don't remember. 2021 had its advantages. I like vaccines. That's great. Was that this year? Yeah. Feels like it was this year. That was this year.

You and I got vaccinated this year. Wow. Gosh. And boosted. Yeah. So that's good. I am a pretty optimistic guy. Yeah. I think that things are going to be okay next year.

But I don't have a ton of confidence that we're going to get to a really solid, stable place like we had for a few decades after I was born in the next 10 years or so. I think it's gonna be a bit messy. I think we've got a bit of a messy time ahead of us, honestly. Yeah, I feel a lot of apprehension about the next few years, in general. So it's a little hard to piece that all together.

What I will say about 2021 in retrospect versus 2020, you said that we changed our projections to fit our experiences. And that's true to some extent, but as definitely not the way I felt about 2020, like when I think back to December 2019 And how I thought that year was gonna go and how I we'll kick back at at the end of December 2020 Like it did not go how I thought it was gonna go when I was acutely aware of that and In that sense this has been a return to normalcy because I thought 2021 would be Challenging and and it has been. I am very worried about

the next few months and then I'm very worried about like the overall arc of the next decade. Yeah, I mean, one of the things about COVID has been that a lot of my worry has been around the disease itself and the effect that it has on individuals. And what I think that we don't think enough about is the effect, or what I didn't expect, is that to the effect that a long-lasting pandemic would have on society. And I feel like that's the thing that is giving me a lot of apprehension. I am very discouraged by the lack of folks who have gotten through this together. To continue to prioritize the people who need to be prioritized. And to continue to prioritize the people who need to be prioritized and I, you know, I feel so much empathy for people in healthcare right now who are on, you know, on the edge of having done this for years almost and now are looking toward another really rough time. And that, yeah. Something that I keep in my mind a lot.

Yeah, I think that it's going to be very hard to consider the effects of COVID from where we are because we're too much in the middle of it. Like Stan always says that when you're living in the middle of history, you can't know what it means. And I try to remember that because my impulse is to think can't know what it means. And I try to remember that because my impulse is to think that I know what it means. And to think that I have a straightforward narrative that is the full narrative, but we aren't going to understand, you know, we just don't have that perspective right now, to really understand what it means and what it means for us as a society moving forward.

What are the lessons that we're going to learn and which ones are we not going to learn? And the thing that I'm most worried about is the long-term impacts. I mean, I'm worried about the impacts, obviously, that it has on individuals on a day-to-day basis, you know, all the people who are struggling with COVID or losing family members to it or losing their lives to it. It's of course the biggest concern, but there are long-lasting societal implications for this that I don't understand and that I don't have any perspective to understand yet, and I don't know what that's going to be.

I know that my daughter doesn't know, doesn't meaningfully remember what it's like to go to school and see her teacher's mouth move. Yeah. And I don't know when Alice is going to be in a learning environment where she does. And I think that will have a big impact on her. Yeah. Yeah, and I think it's impacted learning for millions and millions of kids.

Yeah, and I think it's impacted that our sort of like collective ability to rely on each other and to trust each other and feel comfortable with each other. And that has huge impacts on mental health that but we also know that humans are super resilient and that we find ways to deal with different structures and different ways of society's working. And like we are dealing with we're dealing with a lot of that right now we're in a huge transition with regards to how people communicate with each other which is always a really. to how people communicate with each other, which is always a really tumultuous time before we figure out how to do it properly, which takes decades, a minimum, to figure out how to deal with revolutions and communication like the internet, but also the internet plus

sort of a reaction to the pandemic. So it's a very, we are cursed to live in interesting times. And and and do you ever think about when we were kids and we would think like, Oh, I wish I lived in an interesting historical moment. Oh, yeah. Now I very yes. And but before I will say before before I was living in a more interesting historical moment, I did realize, I think, that I didn't actually want that. I remember people talking about golden ages. And then, like, one day, like, in college, I was like, oh, this is one. This is, like, we, this would be sort of looked back. Like, it's obviously

not perfect. Like, as we're none of the golden ages. But, like, this is a very comfortable time for me anyway. And boy, do I think that sometimes we don't notice? Yeah. So that's how we're feeling, Megan. We're feeling great. But you know what? Go into 2020. I remember like lifting my champagne glass to my friends and being like, here's to the best year ever, and I was wrong. And maybe I'm wrong, maybe I'm wrong again. Maybe, maybe a hot boy summer is coming at last. I'll tell you what, we are good at anything. Hank and John specifically, but humans in general, are good at being wrong about the future. John is so wrong. This next question comes from Maggie who asks, dear Hank and John,, but humans in general are good at being wrong about the future.

John's so wrong. This next question comes from Maggie, who asks, dear Hank and John, the logo for Complexly, which is our educational media company, looks like a maze. It has an entrance, but no exits. Is this on purpose?

Or is the designer trying to confuse and trap us, trapped in the sea, Maggie? I gotta say, Maggie, I just liked how it looked. I, you're thinking too deep. I don't, I, now I'm concerned. Didn't you make it? No. Oh, it looks to me like a Hank Green design.

And maybe, well, it's the one I, I, I approved it. So, yeah. It is funny though, that there's no way out of the maze. Well, you just go back out. You go in, this is, oh yeah. Go in and you look around and you find some stuff and then you leave. That's. Yeah.

That's education. Right. You go out the same way you came in, naked. And alone and scared. Thanks for coming to our educational media company. Oh my God. Oh, God. Oh, boy, it's real darker out here.

Oh, geez. Oh, geez. I wasn't ready for this. It's so, it's, it is an interesting time, John. Oh yeah. Let's be clear though, it could be so much worse. Oh yeah. And that's a big, yes, no.

All of the worst ways that it could be would be more interesting ways. I would like things to be really boring. That's my ambition for 2022 is the most boring year on record. I mean, I will say lots of interesting, powerful stuff, like, like, good interesting things have also happened. Like the, the difference between the efficacy of mRNA vaccines and all the other vaccine, and I said this to Cassidy.

Oh, that is incredible. The other day, we were pulling into the house and I was just sort of like waxing poetic about vaccines. And I said, what people don't understand is that like the difference between an mRNA vaccine and like the normal like live attenuated vaccines that we, you know, still use, like, it's like the difference between a computer chip

and like offense. Like it's just like the, these old ways of doing thing of making vaccines were so like labor intensive time consuming really, like subjective and just messing around and hoping, like a lot of hoping. And now these MRN A vaccines can be applied to a lot of different situations. And the more that we know about them, the easier it will be to do that.

And pandemics are going to be so much, specifically viral pandemics are going to be so much easier to deal with in the future. Yeah. And we will be able to hopefully respond to them quickly if we build up the kind of capacity and resiliency and the healthcare system that we need to have. Yeah. Yeah, and I have a ton of faith in science right now, but I am frustrated at, you know, our lack of ability to communicate with each other, to feel good about each other, to connect and not sort of villainize each other constantly. Yeah, and also I think we've seen a lot of the places where, you know, private enterprise

doesn't do it. Yeah, doesn't work. And that's been a real frustration for people living in low resource settings with healthcare systems for a long time. You know, like we frankly could have had effective vaccines for a lot of illnesses that cause a lot of suffering and death if the incentives had been the same over the last 20 years and we could have saved millions of lives. But the second best time to do that is today.

And we can save millions of lives over the next 20 years if we put our resources in the right places. And so that's another takeaway for me. But on an individual level, it just sucks. It sucks. And a lot of people are dying. And a lot of people are losing family members. And a lot of people are in incredibly stressful situations because of COVID. And it sucks. Hey, we got another question from Melanie who writes, dear John and Hank, I'm sitting at my gate right now at the airport. I'm 24 years old and it's my first flight alone.

Do you have any suggestions for someone flying alone for the first time? Not Melanie, Melanie. So this person has flown before, but never alone. I don't you feel like it's better to fly alone? Oh, well, because you're never really alone is the problem. You will have a neighbor. I would much rather sit next to Catherine

than a strange person. So there's two parts of this experience, right Hank? There's the flight and there's the part in the airport before the flight leaves. Yeah, what do you like to do in the airport? What's the flight and there's the part in the airport before the flight leads. Yeah, what do you like to do in the airport? What's your like main go to airport activity? Because mine is answering emails. Oh no, no, I like to take full advantage of the space that I'm in. Almost every airport has some kind of art gallery or history, diorama or something. They all have chapels and the chapels are weird and really cool. And so I like to visit the chapel. It's almost always empty. It's also

a quiet room where you can hang out with the door closes, which is nice. I love to go everywhere in an airport. I love the like convenient stores. How are there still so many magazines? That's one of my main feelings when I'm in an airport. I'm like, this is great. Look at all these, man, these come out every month. I think, I think a huge thing is a good playlist. So I love, or like your favorite album,

I love to cruise through an airport, like being on the moving walkways and just listening to some, some like 1960s punk rock or some like weird 80s synth wave. And you're just like, ah, nobody knows how cool my music tastes are. Look at all of these people with their briefcases. Nobody's rocking out like I am. Of course,

they all are in their own ways. And then I like to have a podcast or audiobook that I know two things about. It's not going to make me cry. And it's not going to have a big old surprise sex scene because I am made very uncomfortable by sitting next to a person and listening to a description of two characters enjoying each other's physicality in that way. So I like to know enough about the piece of media that I'm going to be listening to, and I know it because I have listened to podcasts that have made me weep, sitting next to a businessman from Dayton before, and it's a little much. I think that's better actually than the kind of podcasts

where you burst out laughing out of nowhere. You know, like, you're like in the gym and everybody's just doing in the gym stuff. They're all listening to their synth wave, you know, and you're like, which is what do you're hanging John is for? We're a podcast that's not that funny and it's not going to make you cry. So it's perfect for airplanes. Also, there's a zero percent chance of kissing scenes.

Like you never have to worry about that. There's no romance here. It's not gonna make you uncomfortable. It's a world with our romance. Here on Dear Hengenjohn. That's my, and I think that having your ears occupied, unless you are into the potential of having a stranger conversation, which I sometimes am,

but maybe that would be good at this point, Hank. I haven't been on a plane in a long, long time, but maybe I want to have it. Maybe that's something that post pandemic me is going to be like, I like having conversations with strangers. I just need to talk. I mean, I was at the thrift store the other day and I started to talk to the lady at the front as she was checking my, and I was like, what am I doing?

I'm like, I just like told her about my whole day. Yeah. I'm that guy. Yeah. Really it in, buddy. Yeah, so maybe talk to a stranger, but also maybe just listen to a podcast or see how it goes.

Have a podcast ready and you'll get through the flight. No problem. I miss it. I don't miss airplane flights. I do really miss airports. I love airports. There's such there's such sites of joy and connection because you see people reuniting.

You see people saying goodbye. It's just it's incredible. You see all of the human drama in an airport. And yeah, I also love airports. I because it's it's all these people who work to make something very complicated happen. Yeah. Almost always on time.

And I see all the little carts drive it around and the people doing the things and everybody's got to be at the place at the right time and then it all works. Now, it sometimes doesn't all work. But it works fairly well in the scheme of things. Yeah. And then if you're appreciating it when it does work,

then when it doesn't work, you're like, well, yeah, I did notice that there are about 30 vehicles involved in the getting of this plane ready to go. So I can see how maybe sometimes it wouldn't work perfectly. Which reminds me, John, that this podcast is brought to you by Alok Heart, the company that makes the little cars that drive around and refill up all of the snacks on the airplanes.

I think that's what that company's called. One of our childhood friends, Dad's worked for that company when we were kids, remember? No, I don't. Doug, I don't. Doug did? Yeah. I knew he worked at like, like airport stuff. Yeah. No, that's what he did. He was, he, he recently died. And I have to say, this is the wrong vibe for

the podcast. I know. But he was the funniest person I have ever met who was never mean. Yeah. He had a credible sense of humor that did not in any way rely upon cruelty. He was so funny. That's a big win, that's a big win. Yeah. Today's podcast is also brought to you by Hank's death cave. What?

What? What? It's real hard to know how to make that transition and I guess I just kind of went for it and it did not work. That was great. Hank's Death Cave. Hopefully, we've transitioned away from sincerity. Well enough to talk about Hank's Death Cave.

This by guys, this is also brought to you by the very, very, very important book that is located somewhere in Johns House. No one knows where it is, except fire. Oh, God. And of course, today's podcast is brought to you by the L Tetris piece. It's Hakes Consciousness is going to be uploaded inside of a Tetris piece, and it will be the L.

Just once I'm gone, just think about me every time that L-shaped one comes down. I think you might want that. Not backwards, though, that's not me. I think you might last longer than Tetris. Absolutely not. I think you got a chance. I, that's like saying I'm gonna last longer than chess.

No. Well, I don't know if you've been following what's happening in the world of classic Tetris Hank, but basically some people have gotten so good at Tetris that it's almost broken now. They can just go forever. Yeah, so like the highest score in the world for a long, long time was 1.4 million. And it took like 30 years to get to 1.4 million. It took like five years to get from 1.1 million to 1.4 million. And then this guy,

cheese invented a new way to hold the controller that allows you to move the pieces much, much, much faster to the left and to the right. Oh, yeah. And then he got a score that was 2.6 million. So like, he almost doubled the best score ever by basically playing forever. All right. He plays so beautifully. Like honestly, when I was watching that game, I thought I would like to make a vlog whether it's video that it's just a 25 minute breakdown of how incredibly beautiful

this game of Tetris is. Oh God. It's so beautiful. I teared up a couple times where I was like, how can somebody take such a simple game and make it so beautiful? Anyway. Yeah. Well, well, Well, this is the thing. Games need innovation sometimes. So I think the Tetris will make it. It will just be finding new ways to be itself. That's lovely. Hank, I love that.

Before we get to the all-important news from Mars and AFC, Wimbledon, I do need to read you one critically important response. Okay. From Jonathan, who writes, Dear Brothers Green, I am a PhD student at Purdue University currently studying chickadee ecology in Indiana. And I realized I may be able to provide some insight into your chickadee debate on a recent episode of the podcast. You'll recall that I saw a chickadee and Hank said it wasn't a chickadee and I said it definitely is.

And here comes Jonathan. What's it? Here comes Jonathan the expert. So let us who's getting a PhD in literally chickadee ecology. Indiana has two species of chickadees. The black cap chickadee and the Carolina chickadee, black cap chickadees are in the most northern part of the state. So all the chickadees in the Indianapolis area are Carolina chickadees.

Meanwhile Montana has four species of chickadee. The black-capped chickadee, the boreal chickadee, the chestnut-backed chickadee, and the mountain chickadee. Carolina chickadees often formed mixed species flocks with nut hatches and tuff-dit mice in the winter, so it is very common to see them together. I have attached a file that illustrates the various chickadees' species and compares it to a not hatch. Regardless, they do look similar, so it would be understandable to mix them up.

By the way, while the chickadees in Indiana are likely similar in size to the ones in Montana, John was right about the ones in Indiana being special. My research has been analyzing the song culture and song types of our local chickadees and so far their songs are more diverse than for chickadees anywhere else in the country as we have found over a hundred song types. Best Jonathan B. Jenkins person who proved John right. Oh, did that happen? Or was I looking at a tough to tit mouse and you were looking at a different chickadee somewhere? We were both right. I guess that's possible. We're both

right because they were they were forming a mixed species far in that mixed flock, which is cool. I didn't know about mixed species flocks. Also, I think I may have seen a TikTok from this guy recently because I did recently see a TikTok that was like, here are the different ways to understand the vocalizations of chickadees. Wow. And they have over a hundred different calls. Wow. And the linguistics of chickadees is very complicated. And is that the guy?

Was it the same guy? Could have been. Or maybe, I mean, I bet they know each other if not. In that case, the, for you page really does know you, or alternately, you sure do watch a lot of TikToks. Well, I get all the ones about, about birds. Well, Hank, it's time for the news from Mars and Nancy Wilden. I'll go first and I'll be brief.

Wimbledon's games have been canceled. We were supposed to happen to play over the weekend, but there are a lot of, there were a lot of COVID cases in board Smith, the team that we were supposed to play over the weekend, but there are a lot of, there were a lot of COVID cases in board Smith, the team that we were supposed to play. And also some of our players have COVID. Some of almost every team currently playing in England has COVID. So right now, there are no games. I don't know when that will change. There was one game over the weekend, and I was watching it and thinking, I wonder if I'll see more football this year, or when I will see more football, and I don't know.

So that's the news, let's move on. I'm sorry about that. Well, in Mars' news, if all, we're gonna cut here because at the moment I'm sorry about that. Well, in Mars news, if all, we're going to cut here because at the moment I'm too scared to talk about anything with regards to space. Oh, the James Webb Space Telescope is really stressing me out. I just need it to work so badly. That's what it does. I need it to work.

I need it to stress this people out. I need it to be. I need it to go well. This is how I it to be. I need it to go well. This is how I felt about perseverance. And perseverance has gone amazingly well. So we've got that. Well Hank, I hope that was a good update. Thanks for bonding with me.

Thank you for podcasting with me, John. You can send us your questions at hankandjonnajmail.com. This podcast doesn't exist without them. So thank you to everybody who sent some in. Thank you to Alec for inspiring this, the really terrible dad joke at the beginning of this. I butchered it, but I like it a lot. This podcast is edited by Joseph Tune of Meticits produced by Rosiana Halls-Rohas. Our communications coordinator is Julia Bloom.

Our editorial assistant is Deboki Chakravardi. The music you're hearing now is by The Great Gonna Rolla, and as they say in our hometown, don't forget to be awesome. The music you're hearing now is by the great gunna roll, and as they say in our hometown. Don't forget to be awesome.