Dear Mr Knickerthief - Icks

Episode Date: October 27, 2025

Warning: The world's worst icks lie ahead. You've been sending in yours and we're ready to call them all out. From projectile bodily fluids, high school hairstyles and dating profile quirks to men who raw dog leather... They're all here! Plus birthday memories from the birthday girl, Jahannah James.If you love Dear Mr. Knickerthief, leave a review and make sure you subscribe to get the latest episodes first.And we always want to hear from you! Get in touch with the podcast on Instagram at ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/dearmrknickerthief⁠⁠Follow Sophie Craig at ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/itssophiecraig⁠⁠Follow Jahannah James at ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/jahannahjames⁠⁠Part of ⁠⁠Podomedy⁠⁠, the independent podcast comedy network.

Hello and welcome to Dear Miss Nickythee. I'm Sophie. And I'm Joanna. And this is the podcast where we used to read out my diary. But now we've opened up the floor to you guys. And now we're going to read out yours. Enjoy.

Enjoy. And remember, it's never too much. It might be too much. Okay. Hi, welcome back. Welcome back. It's Jehahua's birthday. It is.

Happy birthday to you. If you're watching this and not listening to it, I encourage you to watch it. you are not, because Johanna's t-shirt is iconic. I like that this is the gift you gave me and you've called it. The iconic t-shirt that I bought her.

But it is iconic. It is. I actually went to buy this on Instagram and was like oh, I really like it, I don't know if I'm really glad you did. So I'm really glad you did. Yeah. It's so her. It is a t-shirt that says I had my birthday at McDonald's. It's very 90s, which if you know, Jay

is, I think I did well with the t-shirt last year. You did. This year. This year. Nostalgia, 90s stuff. I follow all those, like, accounts. Oh, my God. Like, 90s kids' memories.

Yeah, I did the first, like, really Johanna thing ever this morning. I was drinking my coffee and I had friends on in the background, as you do. And then if you're a friends fan, you'll know the T-shirt that Monica wears. It says Girlfriends and it's got the little, like, washing line on it. I won't bottle that.

Because I was like, that's so cute. And I was like, oh, my God, I've just done a Johanna. or Jenna, Jehanna, because you're inspired by, like... Yeah, everything. So the music I listen to is stuff that I've heard on a series or a film or whatever. I don't listen to, like, modern day charts. I listen to, like, film stuff. And things like my favorite hobby is collecting outfits from the movies.

Which, fun fact. Did you know what ASOS stands for? No. The original concept. No. So ASOS starts... The original concept of ASOS was a website you... could go to called as seen on screen.

Yes. And it was supposed to be linking things or similar things. So if you saw something in Sex and the City that you liked, ASOS would be like, well, I've got pink rah-rah skirts that you can buy from here. And then it turned into its own thing. Right. But that's a bit of me. Always wondered what that stood far.

As seen on screen. There you go. A little bit of trivia for you there. That next time they gets asked in a pub quiz, I'll be ready. Other websites are available for Povey. I'll put if you two on a sponsor. But if you would like to sponsor us. We would like that.

Yeah, very much. Actually, this top is from ASAPS. Yeah, as seen on screen now. As seen on screen now. Thank you. But you can, once like reverse Google image search it. And it should come up from last year. But I've done it since I was a kid.

I remember I would watch something. And apparently you'd give me 15 minutes. And I'd be going and finding the closest ensemble that I could and I'd come out. Johanna wears clothes that literally, like if I put, them on, I would be the un-coolest person in the world. No. But on you, no. But on you, they look amazing.

If I came out wearing, what was it you wore last week and you were like, oh, the leopard print jump that joggers, a t-shirt that says don't be a dig and you had a green wool thing on. Oh, my green jolet. And you're like, oh, I feel like the grinch. If I wore that, I wouldn't, I would not rock it. You, however, rock it. Like, yeah, she has like the best.

the best fashion and I like yeah I can't I'm not cool enough on the flip side I couldn't wear what you wear and pass it off like because you wear like classic lady tailoring and you're and and I don't know about what you do you wear like nice beige cloths and things like yes like you have the brownies you have you you you you get tailoring things but because you're very like young and pretty it looks really stylish so pretty yeah all right brownies But I'm old now, it's my birthday. She's two years older than me, which means she's anxious. It means I am injured.

But, yeah, both of our styles on the other one would look weird. I feel so uncomfortable in like classic wear, formal wear. But when you say, it depends that I can't wear tight clothes. And I get really angry in tight clothes. I like a baggy. A baggy fit. I like baggy, but like, yeah, it's tailored baggy. with oversized, I guess.

But you can have tailored and oversized. So it's like, it's oversized on purpose, but then it's pulled in exactly where you need it to be. Yeah. But you wear tight stuff, but even then, like, it's still like, cool. I'm better at it. Yeah, you're good. I'm better at.

But you're like, even if it's like feminine, you make it, Johanna. Like, it's just throwing compliments each other. But you're amazing. You're amazing. No, no, no, you are. No, but like if you've got a dress or something on, you'll whack on a pair of docs with it.

Yes. I have to balance. Yeah. If I feel it's really. weird. If I feel too, too feminine or too, he doesn't feel,

I'm like, something's not right. And then I whack a big pair of army boots on or like a backwards cap and I'm like, I'm ready. Yeah, whereas I'm like, I don't know.

I'm feminine, but like, casual. Like, I couldn't wear a bando dress. Like, that's my idea of hell in stilettos. And like,

or like a corset and I don't know. Like, I'm getting better. You wear neutrals and then you add the feminine on top. That's what you do. I don't know how. And do you remember when you met me? I never used to wear my hair down.

Ever. Sophie. I look back at old four oars and I'm like, what was I thinking? Sophie never wore her hair down. Ever. She had the tightest ponytail. I mean, it was a fantastic ponytail because you've got a lot of hair. It was a hot hair.

I've got three hairs. And so my ponytail, I look like, if I put my hair in a ponytail, I look like a founding father. From America. To be fair, that was me. I was in the founding father like thing. No, you had that. like a very tight high Ariana Grande horse tail coming out of your head and it was great. But I didn't ever wear it.

But you just never wore it down and I'd be like whenever you put your hair down, I was like, wow, where you were? If I had your hair so. Yeah. I pay hundreds and hundreds of pounds sometimes to have extensions that look something like yours. And you'd be, you put it down. I'm like, nope, can't too hot, put it up. Yeah. And then what happened?

You just wanted to realize. I got a divorce. I got a divorce and I realized I'm beautiful. I look great with my hair down. What was I doing? No, I don't know. Yeah, getting more comfortable in my own skin. I don't know.

It was a security blanket for me. I always thought I looked fat with my hair down. Really? Yeah. It's like the opposite. But, no, for a long time, like my face is the same shape as it was like when I was at uni. And then for like a tap, when I get stressed, I grind my teeth. And then I get like what you call cortisol face as well.

You do. So if I'm stressed, I grind my teeth and then I also get caught as all first, which is where. like, you're just puffy. And I used to think that made me look fat. You've heard your hair down? Yeah. So I used to try and like pull it up by having my hair up. Pull it back.

Yeah, pull it back. Like balance it out. Match the favour. But actually all, what I really needed was some layers and some, yeah, because it was long, but it was also like shapeless. Oh yeah. It was a bit. Yeah.

And then. Straight down. Do you remember? Do you remember when I had like one of my nervous breakdowns? Do you remember, but do you remember when I was? The nervous breakdown of 17. Do you remember? Yeah, no. And I cut my hair. We went to Hershissons. Other her sons are our verbal, but they did butcher my hair. We went there. And I went to go and have it cut. And it was really long. And I was like, look, I'll go collarbone. Like, we'll go cute. And it was going. And I just went. And I left it crying. And it was going. And it was awful. I looked awful. Because you wanted that though as well, though. I wanted collarbone. Yeah, but I see what happened. What went wrong is...

My hair's so thick. You were so concerned about it looking triangle. You kept asking her to keep layering it to keep thinning it, whereas she wasn't understanding that you needed it thin from the top, not the bottom. So she was thinning out and thinning out and thing out and you were going, it's still too thick, it's still too thick. And you think it's a good thing when like you're at a point in your life where you're like, oh my God, everything's awful.

I just, I just need to cut off my hair. Yeah. Don't do it? I've done it a couple of times. And then do you remember when I had those highlights put in to try and help it, just give it a bit more because I look like Lord Farquod. Because my hair naturally is pitch black. Pitch black.

Snow white with the black home. And it needed like some, like it needed something because I was like Lord Farquod sort of snip going like on like it wasn't good. And it was the most awful orange stripes through my hair. So I came to you and you rescued it then. Very emo. And it was orange. And then I was like, I got extensions for the first time in my life.

Because I was like I just didn't feel like. Yeah. And I wore extensions for like a year. But what's the shame? It's a shame you had about experience because when you get a bad short haircut... I've done it twice in my life. I've never done it again.

No, no, it's awful. And you've had too bad short... When you get a good short haircut, it is really cool. Yeah, but I can't risk it. No, no, you would suit a good... I knew exactly if I could have a go at your hair, I knew what I would do.

Every time I've nearly ended up with a pixie cut. And it's not good. No, no, no. And it's really sad. And then when it crawls out, I look like Lord Park Quad. So it's, oh, Snape, or when it's a bit greasy, I look like Snape, and when it's clean, I look like Farquod,

because it's like SpongeBob SquarePants. So, yeah, note to self, don't ever do that again. But on the flip side of that, I feel very, very hard. I feel very, very hard. Hair disasters and hair, cutting your hair off and all that. It's part of, it's part of the process of being a girl. And also, it's character building, because I've had so many hair disasters and I've lost all my hair before.

like, oh my god, buzz cut all of it. Yes, that one that you had. So I didn't know Jay when she had this haircut, but she had half of her head shaved off. Shaved. The other half was a mullet. And the other half was a mullet. I had some stripy lime. I was scouted to the hair model and it went terribly, terribly wrong. I'll find pictures we can probably put pictures in.

Oh my God, it's amazing. But it was actually, in retrospect, one of the best things that ever happened to me because I had to cut, I had to just boycott my whole. hair to save it and it's character building. And I realised how much of me relied on my hair to become a security blanket. And when I lost that, I just had to be like, right, well, it's just me in the world. Yeah, well, I've lost it twice. And, no, it doesn't count.

I didn't like it. If your hair is still below your chin, that doesn't, it wasn't, the back of it is like this. No, it wasn't. Oh my God. It was awful. It was, do you remember? No, I did a ponytail and it was like, eh. I was just like, ah.

It ain't no Ariana Grande in that. It was awful. No. I couldn't get it in a ponytail. But still, I wouldn't count. Proper short. I think every girl once in your life should take all your hair off. Because honestly, it changes you as your character.

And then you don't rely on it anymore. And it's not, you're not a slave to having long hair and feeling. Well, I'll take my years of Croydon facelift ponytails as my shirt. Like, I never had hair then, really. It was always in a ponytail. So I'll take it as that. Yeah, cute. I want me doing it again.

It's really like, I don't like short hair, but then you were like, but I'll have it like this. I know. And I look back, and I've got a widow's peak as well, right? I used to be called Dracula at school for that. I actually shared that off once when I was little. Would you be a little unicorn? Yeah, the other unicorn. I started to have a headband for a while.

I did that, not that, but I wanted to look like Matilda. Because obviously I copy movies. And so I watched Matilda. and Matilda has a fringe. Oh, I'd done that. And so I was at a friend's house, not even in my own house. My friend's house went into their bathroom. I found scissors in their house.

And I looked at the Matilda, like the VHS, and I saw that the fringe kind of went to about middle of her forehead. Pop a ball cut. So I pulled the front bit of my hair down and just cut there. Not realising when you cut a fringe, you have to cut from the back, and there's a whole thing you have to do. So I just went like this, and it went... And I was like, I may have made an error.

Literally, everybody in the 90s, I had the, if I can find a picture of it, it's hilarious. The worst bulk crunch. I'm really surprised I've not given myself bangs. Everybody's giving themselves bangs, right? Yeah, well done. Thank you. I haven't given myself bangs for the last few years. I'm really, really proud.

But, yeah, I had a fringe that was like this, like thick, yeah, helmet head fringe. And then one time when we were on holiday in Wales, my mum was in the shower and my granddad said he was going to cut our hair. Well, no. His ear was crazy, granddad. Granddad, no. He put a ball on our head and he'd just cut like this. So it was like all over the place. So my mum came up and I kid you not, you'd have to fix it.

And my fringe started here and here. Like literally the top of my ears and went all the way around. I would kill my dad if he cut my kids hair. Because me and my sister would just have matching that proper bowl cuts. It was so bad. But also like, don't give your kid a fringe when a hair's that thick. I remember at primary school. Do you remember?

everyone had nits, do you remember? Yeah, Nits. Yeah. And when there'd be a Nitz epidemic and there's always like patient zero and then they have a letter out and then everyone has to,

well, we knew who patient zero was. You always know who Pachient Zero was. Because these poor twins, I think they were in the lower school. The mum found nits on these twin girls, freaked out, shaved both their heads. What?

Couldn't deal with it. Shave them. So these twin girls came in with, proper like 11 strangers things. Proper old school. At least there was two of them. It wasn't one. You know, imagine being a girl on your own and you're like...

So everybody knew who had the nits, didn't they? Why would you do that? Bit of a tea tree. I know, do it? Bit a tea tree and a calm, don't know what I mean? There's two of them. She's like, can't be ass with that. I mean, I had the old school that now you just,

I think you just whack a bit of medicine on and they all fall out or something. It's like really... No, you have to still brush them out. Oh, do you have to? Yeah, because their eggs cling to the individual bits of hair. Yeah. Damn it. Yeah, you've got all that to come.

I've got that to look forward to. Oh, and she's going to have curly hair. Oh, they're going to be nesting right in there. They're going to get right in there. Yeah, cut my sister's fringe with some Pete Rabbit scissors. Like, I think it is a right of passage. It's a part of passage. It's a right of passage for any sort of like fringe.

I managed to hide my unicorn. My unicorn fringe because I put like a thick headband across the top of my. And then I last maybe a day or two and then my mom was like, take a headband. It was like, I gave you like a little shrimp here when I took your extensions out. Oh yeah, you cut my... You had a weave, didn't you? You cut my weave out and then cut my actual hair. Just one strand, but it was like...

And it was just a little tuft. No, it was about five centimetres. That's not five centimetres. Yeah. She's got a real issue with size. A real issue of size. It was like this, and then just six months, every time I put my hair up for a ponytail,

I'd have a tuft out the side of like an antennae. Pee-b-be-be-be-be-be-be! But yeah. Yeah, that's good. But yeah, no, I like my widow's peak now. Actually, it was one of the first things my boyfriend noticed when he met me. So, like, you know, we were like friends for ages. Yeah.

I first met him. I was like, he was like, because obviously I was like, I would, I'm not after anything. Yeah. Nothing at all. And he was like, okay. So instead of me like, trying to be like, because I asked him why he said it. And he said it. And he was like, I was just trying to find things to say that wasn't like, you know, anything other than a date vibe.

Yeah. And he was like, he sat down and I was like, hi. And he's like, yeah. He's like, I really like, I really like you're. I was like my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my widow's peak is like yeah yeah really cool I was like yeah I like you know I like your hair triangle yeah that's right right but it healed something in me actually yeah and yeah and then I remember like when he touched my hair like a few months later or whatever it was or a few weeks later and he was like you've got extensions I was like no

and he was like oh that's amazing I was like thank you he's that all a lovely like comments that were like, we are friends, don't panic. He's so cute. Anyway, right. Hair disasters aside. That was a tangent. What is today's episode about? Today's episode is icks.

Ix, yeah. And a lot of people get icked out by people that use the word ick. Is it an ick? Is it an ick? Ick is an ick. Because it's always been there. We've always had icks. Always.

We've only recently like named it as an ick. as an ick. What would it have been? It wouldn't have been. It's not a red flag, is it? No. It's like a cringe. It's like, oh, that's pretty cringy.

Yeah, that's cringy. So we've got some. So we put it out on the socials and it got a big response. Okay. Thousands and thousands of comments. Which is really exciting. So I'll go for it. You're leading it.

That was really beautiful. Thank you for that, Jan. It's a transition. Thank you. Analog transition. Okay. So, dear Mr. Nicker thief. This just, this doesn't have anything else.

She says, spit on the ground. Actually one of my biggest icks. Oh, when people spit. When people spit. Yeah, vile. Like, actually disgusting. I actually walked past a man the other day that, oh, he did, he was just walking past. And he just went like this, like on his nose.

I think I just, something really blew out there. I don't know. I'd expect that to, like, work. I don't think... Did it work? No, I don't think so. No, no. A bit of summer came out.

And I was like, I went to him... And then he went and then he went... And then he went... And he spat on the floor and I went, You're disgusting. And he was like, oh, what? It was just like, you're just... Like, you're just emitting bodily fluids across the floor.

Like, in the middle of the street, like outside, bloody Starbucks of the coffee shops are really. Oh, yeah. Now, when you see, like, yobbs on the floor... Oh, disgusting. I remember, actually, on my way to school. and this is really funny

my friend, me and my friend Danielle, big shout out to Danielle we would walk to school and we had this I don't know where it came from but it was like a it was a paper bag that we drew eyes on and called it the paper bag monster and we had it every day

in the 90s you didn't have things you don't have a phone with paper bag monsters and there it flew off at one point and landed in like something by this wall by this woman's wall right and we were gutted about it. So I respect. We spat there, like, for the paper bag monster

every day as we walked past, just we got for the paper bag monster. Anyway, so we were doing that every day. We would walk to school, go past and say, oh, RIPP paper bag monster and spit. I don't know where it came from. I can't really remember. Anyway, we must have... I've never lost my mic there.

Anyway, we must have been doing this for weeks and weeks. And one of the days, we were like, RIPP paper bag monster. And then this man came running out. He was like, get lost. He was like, Don't you, you stop fucking spitting on my mum's wall. This is her property. We were like, it's for the paper bag monster. We just ran and we never got to speak again.

He must have been watching you every day. Every day, these girls are just spitting on my property. Yeah, like proper chavs. And actually, no, it was a mark of respect for the paper bag monster. But where did you get that from? I didn't know. I don't know. I know.

This was the same girl I wrote the letter to D.M. Snic thief with. Right, okay. That explains. That makes sense. But, Danielle. Big shout out to you for the name of the podcast. The only spitting that was appropriate and that I can be down with is... No, don't say.

Not in sex. No. Oh. A handshake! Not good. No. No. Sorry if you're into that thing, anyone, but absolutely, categorically.

No. No. It's a no for me. It's disgusting. That's an it. That's a bigot. Do not spit. Do on anything.

On yourself? No. On me. No. But no, even the spit handshake can't go. down with that. Oh no, but that is a code of conduct. I'd rather blood. Well that's the opposite.

You can, well, yeah, that's the two choices you have, isn't it? You're like, do we do a blood handshake or do we spit on it? No, blood. I ain't doing spit. You cut me open and swap blood. It cut me open and make me bleed before I touch you off. But no, I've done a few spit handshakes to seal some contracts. Have you? You still do it now.

Yeah. I bought my house. That goes out. Thank you, Barclers, for the mortgage. Oh, okay. Dear Miss Nicker Thief, uh, big ick for me is those blokes that wear no socks with smart shoes. Woo, yes. Really?

I don't like a bare ankle. Especially if they're wearing, like, tight skinny jeans that are a bit short, and then they've just got like brogues on with no socks. Oh, no, it's the tight, for me, it's the tight skinny jeans. Well, that's also an ink. But, like, that's like another level of it. But shoes that don't, that you don't have socks. Oh, my gosh.

men with like big upper bodies and skinny legs. Yeah, no. Can't be doing with that. Sorry. Do your legs, guys. It's, it's, it's, yeah, that I'm agreeing with, when men just wear, like, raw, I can't not think about it, and I'm like, your feet are just in leather.

I'm raw dogging the leather. Just raw dogging the leather there. It's got to be sweaty in there, isn't it? They're going to rub. The athlete's foot is real. It's, and I can't not, I just wear socks. But then equally, equally, the people, the, like, the little tight socks that you,

you remember we used to get whenever we used to wear dolly shoes. Oh, and you wear the little... Hook over your toes. You just literally hook over your toe and they heel. And they just fall off. They just crawl up inside your toes. What's worse?

Oh, I don't know. Okay, wait. Question, what's worse? I quite like an ankle sock. A man in socks and sandals or brogues and no socks. Ooh. I'm going to say brogues and no socks. No socks.

I would do the same. I'm not... I'm kind of here for it. You kind of... It kind of gives the vibe that you're like so cool that you don't care. You could style it out, you could wear cool socks,

crocs, socks and crocs. Slightly less. No, I don't know if I prefer a crock. I don't know. The bear's money for, okay, that's the consensus. Okay, that's a good one. Yeah, but it's the skinny jeans

with the brogues and the, especially, poor guys, sorry, you can't win. I'm like, if you go to the gym, right, and you've got a big upper body, fantastic, but if you're not doing your legs, like I know some people actually have slim legs, but if you've got a big, big,

stacked upper body you clearly work out do your legs yeah because you're gonna double over and then don't wear skinny jeans or dress for your figure like it's okay but just dress equally though they can't win because if they've got

mahousive legs and they want to show them off and put on skinny jeans I can't deal with that either no I can't I'm just like no either way I'm really sorry just nobody needs a tight gene around the ankle no no nobody does

women as well let's just keep it loose Skinny jeans, I heard they were coming back and like a while ago and I was just like, I can't get down with it. You will not get me back in a skinny jean. How difficult, do you remember how difficult it was to get skinny jeans off in the heat of the moment? When you need to de-robe. I don't remember ever wearing skinny jeans during then.

You didn't. But for us skinny gene people, you would always, they would get stuck because they're so tight from the needs a thing. And you're trying to de-robe and trying to do it sexily. and you'd end up having to be like or you would have to get them to help you pull your jeans inside out and then you'd get like one for your foot would be stark

and then it would lose circulation it was a whole thing now you can just like unbutton and drop yeah I'm all about the oversized everything loose not everything oversized shoes I try to take a size nine what size shoe are you

I'm an eight can't do that sorry only 13 I know but I'm five foot three fine You size 13? Anyway, dear Mr. Nicker Thief, my ick is finding out he was taking me to the pictures that was two for one, getting there for all the tickets to be sold out,

then taking me to the pub where I brought all my own drinks and he waffled it on all about himself. But it's strict to Australia. That's a very specific it. I mean, that is not a universal ick. But I understand. I bet it could be out on a date. I thought she was going to say he took me for a two for one cinema.

I was like, that's not an ick. that's a No, but the two for one cinema and getting there all being sold out when there's not that he can do about that though either like it's like he's tried really hard he's got there and he's like oh

sold out well uh just go to the pub then just talk about my trip to Australia no no yeah I hear that I remember going on a date once and this isn't like me because you know me like I I'm not a date her yeah not at all like the idea

of dating frightens me I am oh I love a date once date. Yeah, no, I've not, like, I, I, I just don't, the whole thing of like, multiple people at this, no, I can't. I'm not too much pressure. And so I went, the one date that I went on with a random guy, I was like, I think 21, you were young, I was young, 22, I can't remember, anyway, and I met him out in a club, and then he was like, oh, let's swap numbers. And then we met for dinner the next day. I didn't remember what.

what he looked like because I had quite a bit to drink. And he met him and it was like, and it had to do that thing, you know, where you're like, you text your friend and you're like, please ring me. Oh, yeah. To get out of it. Oh, it was bad. Sorry, emergency. He was proper like, mm.

Yeah. And he kept doing this with his lips. Mm-hmm. Ooh. And I was like, I was like, I can't, I've got to, I need to leave. Like, yeah, like just stop. And he was just. And then the worst thing was, uh, I had in my head that it was like 25, 24.

He was 19. just. So I was like, goodbye. But it was the mouth thing. It was like, mm, yeah. And that matters when you're 21 and they're 19. Those three years matter. No, but it does.

It does. Like, now it doesn't matter. Like, it doesn't matter. No. When you get older. I don't know why. Okay. My, my, uh, itk, uh, with guys, um, that I've dated is when they, when they make

pronunciation mistakes. Oh. No, no, no. It's like they're intelligent people. They know it's wrong, but they choose to say it. Oh, my God. Yes. I've got two of these to talk to you about.

I had a boyfriend, my first boyfriend, who used to call it the Texas chainsaw massacre. And I was like, you mean massacre? And he's like, yeah, you know, the Texas chainsaw massacre. Masaka. It's like saying meringue, like marigoo. Yeah. Or jalapinos. Jalapinos.

Yes. My sister does that. So I'm like, the Texas train song. on the soccer and it really gicked me out that you couldn't talk properly. I was speaking to somebody quite high up like a lawyer I think they were

and they used the word Pacific instead of specific. Pacific and Pacific and Pacific. They're like oh pacifically and I was like you mean specifically and then I had an estate agent come round and she was looking around and she was like yeah

yeah it's quite anaesthetically pleasing. I was like anaesthetically pleasing and a fucking stetically do you mean aesthetically oh yeah no I can't do that. But people that say real conviction.

Like Pacific. No, I'm telling you it's that Pacific one. Yeah. Do you mean like the ocean? Yeah. And my current fiancé has one. I'm going to call him out on it. Oh, your current fiancé?

My current fiancé. The current one. My current husband. Are you married? Not currently. Sometimes. Occasionally. Depends on the season.

My fiancé, he says, he doesn't say lasagna properly. He says lasagna. Oh, no. And, and I've even, we've been in, like, Italian restaurants. And I'm like, sorry, can I have the, uh, and they're like, lasagna. I'm like, yeah, I'm like, see, they say it lasagna? And he's like, yeah, lasagna, lasagna. I was like, no, no, no, no, no, it's lasagna.

Lazzania. Lazzonia. I'm like, what are you saying? You're not Italian. No. Stop trying to be. So that, he knows that that makes me out because I always bug him about it. It's so funny.

Okay, Demos, Nicky Thief. this is universal. Okay. Missing teeth are rotten ones. Oh. Yeah. Teeth are a big thing. I mean, anyone, take anyone in the world.

Beautiful people, Margot Robbie, Johnny Depp, anyone, take your front tooth out. Hmm. It's difficult. That's hillbilly. It's just like, yeah, just rotten teeth. I think, I think, though, that's probably a deeply, deeply, like, safety, evolutionary thing that we find that. because if you're... Oh, here we go, every single podcast we get a bit of like a beautiful, like, theory or like a beautiful, like, psychology lesson.

I love this. That one makes sense. That is, that's like an intrinsically evolutionary ick that we have because if someone's got rotted teeth, they're infected. It's like, it's like infected. And you're going to enter your... Have you got an absence? Yeah. And back in the day, infected teeth meant death.

Yeah. So, if people miss teeth, it. and stuff, they're not in a good way and it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a lot of sense why we all, because I don't think anyone goes, you have to get your teeth done after you've had your baby. What do you. What do. Yeah. And it was like, I mean, back then, everyone got dentures by 30. Yeah. But she, she, she, she, she, has lost all her. And she. But teeth have to have a baby, yeah. Babies. But I was like, nobody, I haven't had of anyone do that nowadays.

Obviously, nowadays we've got like diet. Diet and dental care and everything. My teeth have been bleeding quite a lot. That's normal though, apparently. It is normal, but it's also like, horrible. Brushy your teeth is hard with HG as well. Yeah. I imagine.

Not that I know. When their dating profile just says, Own house, on car, on teeth. Oh, there's a lot of teeth. When their dating profile says, like, yeah. That would dig me out. Why do you need to mention that you've got your own teeth? Thou doth preteth too much, sir.

No, no, no, no, no. Maybe it's a good thing because evolutionary. Oh, maybe he's like, I know that if I've got good teeth, I'm a good mate. No, no disease here. Look. Oh, someone does per-this-is-trolling me, actually, anyone with a citron tattoo on their wrist. I have got a Viking roon on my wrist that does look like a citron tattoo. What does that ruin me?

Gavin. that means create your own reality. Oh, I thought it meant. And I was having my nails done. This way. This way. It means citro. Which also means create your own logo.

Create your own reality. But I was sat in the nail salon not long ago. And the girl was like, oh, I have that too. She was like, create your own reality. It was like, yes. But everyone thinks it's Citron. Either. I just was like, I walked straight into that, didn't I?

This way, mate. That way, mate. No, it means create normal. For anyone not watching, she's got like an arrow. Like a double arrow. A little arrow. A Citron logo. But me and my best earring got it.

Imagine. Anyway. Okay. This one I can get down with. Okay. Deavis Nick Thief. Ix for me. Stinking honking breath.

I dated a couple of guys with mingin breath and there is no need for it. I had to hold my own breath whilst they talked. That is a big ick. A lot of dental things. Yeah. A lot of mouth hygiene. Halotosis. Halotosis.

Halotosis. My dad has halotosis. Does he? And it was the bane. of my mum's marriage to him. It was bad. It was medical though, isn't it? It's like medical bad breath.

What's that caused by? Like them little white things that you get. What are them little white things that you get sometimes? Like, you know, in the back of your mouth? Or you get them, like, you see people removing them on, like, TikTok, like behind the tonsils, that little... When your tonsils get, like, the white pastels. Things, yeah, and they smell.

Yeah. Really bad, apparently, yeah. Is that it? I don't think he's got that. He's got medical halitosis. And I'm scared that I've got it now, thanks to our jeans. I have that really bad morning breath because I have a retainer. Yeah, I have a grind guard.

And the retainer gets clammy. Yeah. I put it in, I put my grind guard in, you know, like the fizzy dentist. Dentist sticks, the what dogs eat, aren't they? The denture, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I can tell it's bad because my dog will come up and try and say hello in the morning. And even the dog's like, ooh. Oh, my God. thinks is bad.

That's really bad. Well, you would be an ink. Oh, this is a good one. Do you miss him if you? Looking at their phone while they're talking to, while you're talking to them, they'd be left with their phone quick, sharp. Yeah. Yeah, that's an ache.

That's an ache. And I also think we're all probably guilty of it as well at some point. Yeah, it's awful. Yes. It is, but it is bad. Like, our attention spans are so bad. Yeah. I think we all need to be more aware of that, so thank you so much for that.

Sox with sliders, big ick. Not for me. Not for me. I think you can be cool. Unless they're wearing them to like a wedding or something. Then I'm like, no. But I'm never not. Look, wear some nice shoes with socks.

I mean, if you were wearing only socks and sliders and nothing else, that would look weird. There's like a backwards Woody the Pooh. Yeah. That actually, that's an ick for me. That's a nick for me. Oh. Maybe. What's your ick?

My ick is when they're just wearing a t-shirt and no bottoms and like no boxes. So they're just walking around with their bottom out. Oh, Winnie the Pooing? Winnie the Pooing it? Yeah. Like, yeah. So my ick is a Winnie the Poooo. It's a funny egg.

No, no, that's an ick. I don't like it when I do it myself. My ache is when someone's, you think that you're both naked and then afterwards they've been wearing socks the whole time. That aches me out. I'm like, take your socks off. Oh, I'm not a feet person, so I don't mind. The one was worse.

The stage up from that, it was Winnie the poo t-shirt and socks. so you just removed your trousers and pants. But you kept the top off and you kept... Yeah, just keeping the top half. No. Like, oh, just like when you're wandering round and just Winnie the Pooh. Like, it is Winnie the Pooh in it.

Yeah, it's a foot that's a footy yick. I, at the moment though, to be fair, I do the best Winnie to Pooh right now because I've got the belly. So if I just walk around and dress a t-shirt, which I have done, it is really funny. Oh, God.

Okay, dear Miss Nick Thief, if she's crossing the road and pushes the button for the green man but walks before it comes on because there's no traffic and when a car arrives there's a red light but no pedestrian who really doesn't like the inconvenience that call days. How dare you mess up the regulations of traffic law? Very logical person. I mean that doesn't ick me out but if I was driving it would annoy me that I have to stop

or but it doesn't ick me like I'm not... Can you imagine going on a day? Sorry, can I just ask you, sorry. Sorry. Do you push the button for the green man but then go and there's no traffic so that leaves the man or the woman driving stood at the lights when there's no pedestrians? Yeah, sometimes. Sorry, I can't continue with us.

And do you watch Love Island? No, it's like, it's a weird list. My mum, I just remember my mum, there was a, she was not very confident driving, and she couldn't turn out onto a main road in Lewisham. So she used to get me or my brother when we were very small, to get out of the car, run across to press the light, to make the car stop so that she could get out. That's quite clever.

And so she'd be like, go, run, run to the lights. And we were running, like, press the light and then run back again. And then... Oh, it's lesser. Yeah. Oh, this one. A mustache that grows over their mouth. Oh, when it curls over the lips.

Like, yeah. Or when it's, like, just little bits of hair that come across the lip. Or like... A little brush. Yeah, like, like... Groom match. That guy out of Futurama, that... Yeah.

I don't know you mean. Yeah. Yeah. It's like you've got an octopus mouth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And oh, when there's bits of food in it. Oh! I know.

gig for me when that little bit of white foam collects at the corner of someone's mouth yeah we had a teacher that no can't no that's disgusting like give your mouth a dab or like have a sip of water and what's the etiquette for saying oh you've got a bit of foam crust in your mouth like yeah what is that like mouth froth like slight rabies like what what is it like I don't know like like a frothing. Yeah. My dog froths when she's been for a run and has felt, got a sniff on.

Yeah, that's gross. Yeah, that's a big it. And I've had, yeah, when you see the really cut, it's like backwards eyelashes over their lip. Yeah, it's like you want to just go and just have a little trim. Let me just trim that.

Just a little bit of wax. Do you know, if you've got a moustache, great. Wax it up. Yeah, or when people's eyebrows, hair start to, like, grow along. Like, do you know what I mean? Like, there's fish there. At the bottom of the ocean.

Oh, God. Oh, okay. This is gross. Demon Snicket Thief. Asking me if I have Snapchat at over 30 years old. Yeah. Yeah. Who Snapchat's at 30 years old?

I think some people still do. Oh, sorry if you do. I mean, I don't. I came off that years ago. Yeah, I don't have Snapchat anymore. But apparently, like, so my sister, who's 16, all of her conversations are all of Snapchat. Oh, really?

So it's all the young ones. Yeah. All of her conversations are on Snapchat. Did you know? Because obviously Snapchat is, You feel safe because they all disappear and everything. Yeah. But I was watching Mike's.

I love like true crime murder shows. And watching a forensic, a digital forensics episode. And they were like, oh no, it's a complete fabrication that they disappear. Yeah, of course. Snapchat retain every single image video. Whereas WhatsApp don't. WhatsApp don't. But all these kids are going on Snapchat.

Yeah. And it's caught so many people out from a law perspective because people have, they've, they've mess. or they've thinking that Snapchat disappears. They've organized like going to kill someone or beat someone up or they've got evidence that they think is going to disappear. Or like attacks and stuff. And the police just have full cooperation with Snapchat and they will pull up anything you need.

Or I guess you could even if you knew someone inside Snapchat you could like access it or pay them for the access. So the fact is it does not disappear kids. So do not send nudie videos on Snapchat because they are. stored in an archive. Somebody else has got them, just not the person you sent them to do. Yeah, exactly. Okay, yeah, I get this one.

I've had some real issues with this in my life. On me. Demon Snick Thief and he says, eyebrows that look like the night logo are airbag lips and crispy cream fillers. It's very specific. Oh, I guess what he means like crispy cream donuts. Krispy cream donut, like face, like...

They're just so round, like round. And airbag lips. But eyebrows look like this. The Nike logo had those in the 90s. And then they went really thick. In fact, when I met you, my eyebrows were like awful. Like I looked back at pictures of when we met with my Croydon hair facelift. And like the thickest eyebrows that I just drew on with the Anastasia Beverly Hills stuff.

Because I just thought I had. And they were, I look back and I'm like, oh my God. I've had an eyebrow shock. I'm like, what? But I was like, my eyebrows are awful. They were awful. And I thought they were okay. And I was in my 20s.

Like there was no excuse for that. We're all victim to, it's the victim of the fashion of the eyebrows, because they change completely. Yeah, but mine were like plucking them really thin. Pull opposite to each other. Like one was really drawn on thick and the other one was like another shape. It was like a, it's like a, looking at a snake and a worm. But I would say awful. I had blonde hair and basically drawn on black eyebrows and you do the, and you had to do the box, the two square boxes.

And I was, I was not letting go of that for long and the winged eyeliner. I did not let go of that for years. Do you remember? Yeah. I was like in on the winged. I was like, what about a little eyeshadow? You're like, no, just a line. A winged eyeliner with a wet eye.

What are they called? Like a wet liner. A wet liner and a thick boxy brow. I look back now and I'm like, people, why didn't people tell me? And I did a course in eyebrows and lashes. God. Dear Miss Nicofi, thief. Gosh.

We should do this. When I'm not pregnant, we should do this a drunk episode. Oh, we should just get drunk one episode. Would you guys like that? Yeah. That would be really fun. I can't wait to get you drunk after you've been pregnant. I've been really drunk a lot throughout your pregnancy.

You have. I've just been, like, sick and sober, and you've just been having a great time. Oh, dear. Dear Mr. Nicker Thief, if they've ever phoned into a radio station for a shout-out. Or for themselves. I don't know. Or for someone else is quite cute. Do you think?

But if they phoned in... If they're just on a lawn in the car and they're just on their... on. No, no, if they've called for themselves, that's weird. But like, but if you, like, I'd like to shout to my nan or something. Yeah, that's quite cute. Yeah, but maybe if they've called in, like, well, if they're doing a long road trip with the ring radio, like, radio farm, be like, how you can shut me out, please? It's not, it's not an ick, but it does annoy me when, when they, they, they, like, people go, they're calling into the radio and they go, okay, you've got 10 seconds to, like, say your thank you, and they're like, I remember what's

like, Uncle Bill and Peter and. and Charlotte and nan and blah blah and they just literally like they just list like 50 names and I'm like this is the most book you're on national waiting for that moment though in time you're on national radio this is so boring to listen to you know they need to read up their family tree um I just been like similar thread to this I get quite icked out when people wish people a happy birthday on Facebook or whatever and they're not on it so like oh like like like like like like Like if you're wishing, like, your one-year-old a happy birthday.

And they're not on Facebook. And they're not on Facebook. Like, I'm all for being like, happy birthday to my gorgeous girl. Here's some pictures of her. Blah, blah, blah. Like, oh, we had a wonderful time of a party. Like, sharing that book. But being like, happy birthday, Isabella.

You are the sun in my sky. And it's just like, but she's not reading this. She's three. She's not tagged. And B, she's three. Like, so, like, I'm all for sharing that. Being like, happy birthday to my little girl and, like, putting that pictures up.

But if you're directly addressing them. Yeah. No. If we think about it, the way I see Facebook, the feed, I look at it like a wall. And it's the equivalent of just shouting stuff at a wall. Thank you, Isabella. Today's been a really bad day, actually. Don't talk to me. In hospital. In hospital. What's wrong, her? Nothing, DM me.

And I just see millions of people just shouting at a wall. It's shouting into the voice. Just shouting and stuff. Attention, please. Attention, attention. I'm deleting Facebook. I'm deleting my friends if you have survived the call. Well done. Share this if you don't want the government to see your private information.

Shocking video. Missing dog. It's honestly, it's just like... For me, Stan Ball. It's like, you're in the north of England, and that was three years ago. I don't... I'm not a Facebook status user. I wasn't the day.

I was. That's what. We did forget to do this on our last podcast. I know it to self. Yeah. Anyway, nearly there. Oh my God. Somebody said about the spin.

in the corner of the mouth we've done this. Now this one, yeah, deemis nick thief, someone who starts a sentence with, to be honest, are, I'm not going to lie. Well, then you are.

Dude, that's an immediate lie. Yeah, I'm not going to lie, but... I'm not going to lie, right? Not going to lie. But you are. Why would you? Yeah, I get that. Why do you need to preference

whether or anything you're saying is a lie? I'm going to assume what you're saying is the truth. Is your truth? Yeah. If you have to. a preface that you're not going to lie. Why?

Why? So what you say before was a lie then? Maybe that's why it's her a lick. Yeah. Okay. One time early in dating, a woman and I will get in to know each other questions after an answer. I said,

that's very cryptic of you. She got mad at my word choice. She got very mad at my word choice. After some back and forth, she thought cryptic meant looking like the tails guy from the crypt, looking like the tales from the crypt guy and she thought I was calling her ugly,

like the cryptkeeper, but that level of vocabulary comprehension turned me off. Oh, right, yeah. Okay, so not knowing the lexicon. I... Not having a wide range of vocabulary. I think, yes, when... Not to be like an academic snob,

because I'm not that academic, but yeah, I think like when people are really quite... thick. Maybe that's not an it. I think I gave my boyfriend the ick the other day. Why, what did you do? Did you just have a moment? So, you know, I am academic, right?

Yeah. Believe it or not, it's that between the two of us. I am very academic, even though I come across not very. But I do, I'm not very well travelled. And geography is not my strong point. Oh, yeah. And, um, pronunciations of stuff. Oh, what did you do? I said, what did I said?

Oh, we're about going to France, and I was like, oh, let's go to Marseille. Oh, no, Marcel. It's Marseille? Marseille. No, we're both doing it. And then... Oh, you called it Marcel, but it's Marseille. It's something like that.

Yeah, I was like, Marcelle or whatever it was. And he was like, what? And I was like, sorry, just because you've been to the south of France several times. Marcelle. And then I said another. one and I got the, yeah, I just got the whole thing wrong and I think I kicked him out. I got quite a few pronunciations of words wrong.

Oh. And he's very, very smart, isn't he? Very intelligent. Very intelligent. And I think I hooked him out. He's got two masters. He's very intelligent. I have two GCSEs. I actually have the best GCSEs of my school. Thank you. Yeah, you are really a boffin, aren't you?

Oh, yeah. Yeah. You're a boffin. Yeah, apparently. Anyway. Men who mess with their bits of the trousers, don't even need to go into that. Oh my God. People that do the hardship with their hands, yeah. Oh.

That's a big it for me. Yeah, when people are like, hey, I love you. I love you. But, Pavon, that's really millennial now, isn't it, apparently? Oh, is it? Yeah, this apparently is really millennial. So what's the Gen Z one? The Gen Z one, it's like a weird thing that you have to do with, like,

then you do this or like, is it this? I can't remember. It's like really weird. Like, look, my hands are shaking, trying to it. but it's like, I can't even remember what it is, but it's like one with a finger, like there's a different version of it, but apparently that's very millennial,

and I can't, I don't like that either. If anyone does that to me, I'm like, actually no, it depends, it's cute. Like, if it's like, a bit like, because sometimes it's cute, it's like a bit camp and it's like fun, and it's like, love you, and it's just like, yeah, that's fine.

No, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. You're not even a hugger. No. I have to force, I have to force myself upon her to give her a cuddle. I don't, she's not, I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that.

Okay, this is one for you, and this is going to be the last one. Oh, actually, this is quite, I'll do two. So it says, when somebody uses the word ick to describe something absolutely normal. Oh. But that's kind of the point. No, I guess I get what they're saying. They're saying when someone has an ick about something that's just really normal, that's an ick. so like what I don't even know what an example of that would be

so like if someone has an ick then me like oh my god he just like he really ate me out because he just like held the door open for me or something it's like that's when you're all the behaviour yeah that is that's the yeah don't yeah don't now I've got an ink with you because you've got an ink with them you need a therapy yeah and this final one is dear miss Nickertheve I have a nick with any man who calls himself an alpha Yes, that's got to be actually up there.

That has got to be up there. Anyone who calls themselves an alpha automatically is not an alpha. The real alphas do not go around talking about being alphas. No. And I saw someone call out, you're obviously like boys or men who want to be alphas. They follow all of the alpha podcast. and things. So someone said,

well, what are you doing following, who follows alphas? Betas. Mm-hmm. So you automatically, if you even subscribe that, they've actually like completely debunked that whole like alpha wolf thing anyway.

Yeah. So it's all based on a load of crap. But. Yeah. Because the, the, the, what they thought was the alpha and the wolf pack actually isn't. The real alpha is actually at the back,

making sure everybody's safe and herded. Yeah. They're not centre front. Anyway, the point is, but I was like, that's a really good point. If you're following, like,

alpha podcast, because you think you want to be an alpha, you're trying to become an alpha. The very, the very thing of follow. Yeah. Means you're ultimately not. But these men,

um, know that they're not alphas, don't me? Because like, isn't that that there's a whole movement where they know they're not alphas and there's the, um,

the, uh, oh my God, my brain. What does you mean? You're talking to insults? Yes. And they know that the insults.

That's it. Like, so like, like they know that they're not alpha. So then they created something else. It's a weird like thing. And then they're finding power in that now is what like it's, it's all very toxic and run a mile.

Have you had someone actually call himself an alpha? I have. Have you? No, I haven't. I've had people go, no. And I don't mind this like because I've, like, yeah, like, I've had people go, no, I'm a man. I'll do that.

And I'm like, okay. Okay. Like I can do it and I probably will But it's nice to be led I do think like especially like Feeling more feminine and feeling more like I think it is important to feel safe and secure Because it allows you to be more playful and more like

Yeah but that's different to someone calling themselves So I've not had anybody ever go Oh no no no I'm an alpha And that no because that I would run on my own It was really they wouldn't be within my vicinity They wouldn't be within myself No they were very much in my vicinity And I was dating this guy who meant

And he just said it in conversation and was like, well, yeah, because I'm an alpha. And I remember going, sorry? An alpha? No, no, no, you're just a man. To describe this man in particular, he was like Peter Petigrew. That was his vibe. The rat from Harry Potter. Yeah.

Scabbas. Why are we scabbas? You're not an alpha, you're scabbas. Yes. Why were you dating? Who, why were you dating this person? I'm not going to name names. No, but you can name him after it. I'm going to find out of this.

I think I probably know. But I remember him literally saying in conversation because, you know, because I'm quite an alpha. Oh, I know who this is. Yeah. And I was like, in my head, I'm like, Peter Fetteridge. No, that's not attractive. That is a red flag.

Not an ick. That's a red flag. See, this is the thing. Like, what you know now? Not what I know. Now I would have been like, oh. Yeah. Like, yeah, there's a lot of things like, like, yeah.

Now I'd be like, no. absolutely. Yeah, first row clock, bye-bye. Yeah. But yeah, you learn. People who say that they're an alpha or even just like, yeah, subscribe to that whole thing, is it. It isn't it? I don't care.

I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. You're social. So, yeah, well, that was it. Thank you guys for sharing your X with us. Thank you.

They were brilliant. So good. Brilliant. Really good ones. And just to finish up, we've got our little thing that we forgot to do last week, not to self, where we read out one of us. And I'm going to say, Jay, because I've done the reading this week. Either a Facebook status on this day.

From back in the day. Yeah, on this day, Facebook status, like going to the memories. Yeah. Or we find a little note in your notes to self because, let's face it, they're all very unhinged. Oh, like reading my actual private notes app out loud. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. What is it? Tone the midrift. Oh, my. Let's go for a Facebook statement. My, did it. Let's do Facebook. Yeah.

It's difficult because this is my birthday today. So on this day, there's a lot of people commenting on me. Did you not put up a little state? It's been like, happy birthday to me. Hee. Okay, okay, this is weird. So this was 2014, 11 years ago on this day. It says, thank you, everyone, for your lovely messages, smiley face emoji.

I had a great birthday. I ate my own weight in German sausages. Not veggie there Tried a burghito Burger in a burrito Oh did you put that in brackets? Yeah Oh good good good

Thank you for the key Thank you for the clarity And called 999 and sat with a cyclist Who had an accident at embankment in front of that That is the most Facebook status ever Like happy birthday to me Called 999

And had to sit with a cyclist That had an accident Oh my god, I'm amazing ate my own weight in German sausage And a burghito Okay that was good That was good 14 years ago

I've got... Is in the south of England. Smiley face. Wow. That's it. Because you're from the north. And somebody's put where you are. And I put...

I was in Weymouth. He-he. Just got off the ferry. It was lovely and warm. Much nicer climate than up north. I'm on my way back up now. I hate me. Why did you say that?

That's awful. I've got so... Oh my God, you'll love this. Today has been extremely productive. My brilliant friend Max got his contract through. We're doing a dance. for an amazing artist

and I just bagged a job as a singer very good first day in London I'd say I just moved down to London 13 years ago today Wow congratulations thank you

and I found out that that job as a singer was actually the one where I was nearly a prostitute Wait you moved down to London on my birthday The day before your birthday yeah this is my first day in London so

but that job was actually not at a singing bar it turned out to be a brothful yeah and we've done a whole we did an episode about it We did because I wrote my diary entry with it. That is brilliant. It all comes around.

Wow. Oh my God. What is it? I wrote out my positives. What do you mean your positives? My positives on this day 11 years ago. Hey. And I wrote out on my status, my three positives.

Okay, go on. One. I have an extremely supportive and understanding boyfriend. That aged well, didn't it? Two, I'm working a day shift presenting. Three, I walk up to Delilah with a head on the pillows, spooning and cuddling. I also nominate. Oh, I hate that nominating stuff.

I nominated my ex at the time to do it for seven days. What, do you just wake up and think positive things? I guess so. But it only counts, only counts if you announce it publicly on social media. Oh my God, and Catherine did it. I nominated Catherine as well. Amazing. Wow.

This was 16 years ago on the birthday, 2009. Check out, check out that. Look at those breasts! I, me in a corset. You look great. Laced gloves and double handguns because I got a job in like a kind of cowboy, um, theater, live theater thing. Amazing.

We were hired by the army for the general's ball. like in somewhere high up in the The generals High up in the British Army We were having They were having like a very posh party Some sort of celebratory party So all the army wives

And all of the generals And all of the colonels and everything And we were hired to be a bunch of cowboys And we were going to be live entertainment For their party So we had to just walk around Shooting each other Yeah

Very embarrassing I did that I didn't know how to use a gun And there's the army Yeah I did that as a policeman and just do an Irish accent and a farmer that's weird isn't it

you get hired for the weirdest jobs oh I've got a happy birthday to you eight years ago and I've also got a status on that same day it says there's always one mate the Siegel is 100% me and then Spain same day Spain you've been great but never

again you and me do not agree with one another and that's I'm making myself out now and that's that for me Well, that's enough. Right. There we go.

Right. You've been listening to. Dear Mr. Nicker thief. If you want to get involved, then you can. There are a few ways you can do it. And yeah, if you've got any stories that make you want to curl up and die and the ground just swallow you whole, then we want to hear from you more. We'd love to hear them.

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DeMis Snick Kthithith. and we've got an email Dear Mr Nick Thief at Gmail.com Yeah, because we're cheap if we didn't want to pay for the actual name so it's still Gmail But yeah, get in touch We put shoutouts on our social

So keep an eye on them On our personal socials as well At Johanna James It's Sophie Craig And yeah, get involved with all your little topics And we'll share them out And remember Yeah, it's never too much

It might be too much Maybe Thank you Thank you