Death To Everyone - Death To... Marvel "Magic The Gathering" Cards, Starfox & Celebrity Insults

Episode Date: August 4, 2026

Hallooooo! Listener, we welcome you back to another week of discussing what should be saved from humanities many achievements after the impending apocalypse. Enjoy! Follow us, won't you? ⁠⁠��⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.patreon.com/deathtoeveryone⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/deathtoeveryonepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/mslazysusan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/zeldamoon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠You can send us a voicemail at ⁠⁠www.speakpipe.com/deathtoeveryone⁠⁠Death To Everyone is recorded at Natural Habitat Studios by Matt Sheers. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.naturalhabitatstudios.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠Our theme and music was provided by Edie Centric and Angus Leslie. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/ediecentric⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/pir_ingi103⁠⁠

to all of them Welcome, darlings Hello Another fascinating episode I think it's time We got this out on the pod How much in real money Have you spent on Marvel rivals

Oh my god I have literally no idea Wait, because it's zero How many zeros is it? Well the game's free The game is free Yeah Okay so you've spent zero dollars

That's not what I said Oh sorry go on the game's free and then what happens well then sometimes they release new outfits does it stop you from playing

if you're not wearing the outfit it stops you from enjoying if you're wanting for an outfit but you're not wearing it currently but you could see a picture of it and then look at the game and look at the picture of it and it feel like you're wearing it

yeah show how much do you think you've spent do you think you spent $10? No I've probably spent like $200 Zelda Because I've bought every season pass, which is like, what's that? Maybe like, oh, I'm hoping that's like 20, 25 bucks. Wait, what is the season pass?

Do you just not look at the price? Well, it's because they're evil. It's not like $20. It's like 2,000 lattice. But 2,000 lattice is like $33 or whatever. So you have to buy the fake in-world currency first. Yeah, which is how they get you because I don't. No. But so then what is a season pass grant you?

Season pass gives you like it's a just like. You're allowed to play? Everything is all cosmetics. The only thing you can spend money on is cosmetics. So they're either like skins, like new outfits for characters. Or you could get different emotes. You could get different sprays that you can spray on the wall. You can get different. What happens when you spray on the wall? Well, like it's like graffiti.

But you can choose a different image. Like I've got Emma Frost Frosty Lips kiss, you know, so I could spray that on the wall in the lobby so that everyone knows that I love a little Emma Frost diamond kiss. Do people sometimes react to things like that? Or sometimes they put another spray on top. Fuck it. Yeah, I don't like that.

And then do you put yours back? Yeah. And then sometimes they'll like, oh, here's my picture of Lunar Snow, and then I'll go and put a little Emma Frost kiss next to it. Do you have people that you play with? not really like who are you playing with

so I've played with the person I've played with most is like my friend Sam who moved to London and we haven't really played that many times you need a gang yeah well I played with

like James a little bit before and then played with Sam a few times I played with like Jeremy once and his friends and then

I've been meaning to play with like um scarlet so hung song oh yeah um and and yeah there's like a whole like gaggle of gays that play yeah but um i've added them but we just i don't know i get a bit shy girl because like you see other people are okay no who's the actual truth here's the truth Is the truth. My username on Marvel Rivals is Zelda Moon. And other people's username is like, funky chief, 75. And I'm like, well, who the fuck is that?

Is that? That's me. Who is that? Yeah. You know, I can't remember all of your stupid avatars and, like, twisted names online. So, like, I never know, like, because these all... So you could be playing with people we know. Like currently?

Yeah. But you just don't know. Well, no, because you have to like, I mean, the chances that you're in the same game as someone is low, because so many people play it, this is such a popular game. But you can add them to your party and like play with them. But you have to like say like, oh, invite Funky Chief 74. But I don't know who that is. So that might be someone I know.

Sorry, Funky Chief. But why that is confusing, right? is like I've got my PS5 contacts. And then so like those are clear, except that in rivals, they're all then twisted into their like rival's name. Disgusting new names. And then also what happens sometimes in rivals

is that like Randos will then add you as a friend if you have like a good match together because they'll be like, oh, we can continue having good matches together. And they're looking for a friend. Maybe. But then it now like my list of friends on rivals is so twisted because it's like Randos that have added me.

People that I do know, but I don't know what their username is. So anyway, when I see people online, I get too shy to add them because I don't know who it is. Which is why. Like a spreadsheet with all their names and then there are other names. I don't want to do that. I think you do. I think you desire the order to the chaos. I want Curgeon to play with me again.

Don't. Take my husband's soul. What is his problem? He plays Overwatch. I know. The same fucking thing. I know. We shouldn't be doing any of this.

That's like, oh, my husband has a meth addiction, so he should get on heroin. No, we're trying to help him. But if I'm doing heroin and he's doing meth, we should both just do heroin. He's been playing Silk Song again, which is good. And do you know what? When I dream of gamer boyfriend, I like the idea that my gamer boyfriend can teach me about it's happening in the cool indie gamer space. Yeah. And or my dear friend could also teach me about what's happening, like, what small games are coming out?

that are like so fun and innovative and exciting. And these two horrors are just like, there's, well, actually, all the games I know right now are in these fucking games that are so boring. Okay. Why is everyone playing fucking Fortnite, Overwatch and Marvel rivals? Can we not do, like, you know, let's get back into the... I mix it up.

I'm mix it up. I want to hear you talk about some of the things you're mixing it up with. Next episode, I'm going to tell you about an indie game I'll be playing. Would you please? Yes. I'd love to hear. All right. I had to go to the...

the internet to find some woman who just downloads everything that's coming up on on Twitch or one day. Have you seen that woman? Hang on what? She like does like she picks a day like whatever, December 6th. Yeah. And she goes and downloads every game that isn't just spam from that day and plays them all. No. And it's so fun.

That's cool. You just see all these like really badly, hastily made games. But some of them have these really weird idiosyncratic elements that are just quite delightful. because it's such a crapshoot. I love that. Yeah, that's fun. That's what I need. Okay, so I'm going to sculpt all my gamers into being that for me.

Or at least just talk about that more. I want to hear more about weird, gay,y thing. You want me to tell you about graveyard keeper? Yes. All right, wow. You're a graveyard keeper. And you take over the cathedral in a small town. Wait, is that true?

Yeah, maybe. Oh, you just... How would I ever verify this for me? It's been a little while since they played Graveyard Keeper. Because you've been sucked with those fucking marvels. Yes. So you take over. Are you Christian or Protestant?

There is a vagueness around religion. Like Leviticus. If you, if people die and you don't bury them or you bury them, they turn into zombies. But then you can also enslave the zombies and you can like resurrect people. in your dungeon and then you can set them about to do your like menial tasks. So when you start the game, you've got to like harvest all the crops yourself. But then after a dedicated time frame, you can have the zombies do that for you and stuff. It's so cool.

I like that. It's really cute. I fucking love that game. What's it called? Graveyard keeper. And there's all these different DLC. They're a little bit like they give me a bit dude bro like developer vibes because like, I don't No, it wasn't one of their D.L.C. kind of like edging towards like stranger things inspired.

Oh. Which, yeah. That's a worry. Yeah. But, oh, that's such good. Um, what's happening? Keep it too. See, this is what, we're learning things here.

Hello, everyone and welcome to death to everyone. This is a show where two celestial goddesses decide what should go into a bunker and be preserved from the end of time. We're also here today, joined by our producer, Matt, who drives our space car through the infinite boy. of the Celestial Void. Hello, Matt. Hi, what's there? And also we have... Hey, it looks sick.

Look at the graphics. Zelda has found out about Graveyard Keeper part two. Hey, it's got voice acting. No, I don't like that. No, I don't like that. I like to imagine their own voices. What's your voice you have for the graveyard keeper? Wake up, Keeper.

Okay. How are you? I'm Zelda Moon. As we learned from your gaming. Oh, yes, my handle. I'm going to play Grand Theft Auto. Yeah, me too. I mean, obviously, you're going to play it,

but I haven't played a fucking game properly in years. I'm going to play it. Oh, fun. What's it coming out on? It'll be on PS5. It'll be fine. But don't you have to get the pro? What?

Isn't there a pro? Yeah. PS5 Pro? Yeah. Don't you have to get the pro for it to work on certain ways? Sorry? What? That would be out.

fucking rages. I heard that it already made $3 billion in pre-sales. Isn't that fucking... $3 billion? Three billion dollars. That's insane. It's coming to the PS5. Can you stop spreading misinformation? What's happening with the pro? I don't know, baby. The pro is just like, what about pro? The pro is just like, I don't know, more efficient or whatever. Yeah, sure. Yeah. Okay, yeah. So I want to know. I'm going to have some. so much fun. It's going to be sick. It looks amazing.

Did you see like the cunty mullet you can have? I also just like, I want to drive around and listen to the radio like I did back in the day. Yeah. I don't want to shoot anyone. No. No. I hope they've improved the shooting since I played San Andreas.

I don't want to do that. I just want to, I want to drive around. Get a tank. I want to obey the road rules and see like how the other cars interact. And like, can I actually sew down in time for the red light? That's really hard. Baying all the traffic laws in Grand Theft Auto Faye. What?

You know that song? No. You and Bo Burnham have a similar sense of humor. The fuck is Bo Burnham. Don't worry. And then I want to see if there's like an in-game zoo. And I'll visit that from time to time. And then you can have a day to meal prep and do your laundry and just get the house in order and then go to work.

Can I actually just say something? when did cooking become meal prep? Oh, I hate that. Well, yeah. Also, cooking involves prep for the meal when you're like topping everything. Who was they talking to recently? Was it you where they were like, do you want to hang out?

Like someone was talking to their friend and they were like, do you want to hang out on Sunday? And they were like, no, we can't wear meal prepping that day. Yeah, what the fuck. You're like, all day. What? You're chopping fucking silver beet all day? Yeah. Oh!

Yeah. Also, everyone has to cook. We famously eat at least three times a day. But I'm also just like, if this is my sixth in the city fantasy, what? Yeah, you think Samantha's declining the invite. Samantha never. I've got a meal prep. I think we might just not know very cool people.

Sorry, but if you're canceling to meal prep, like, get out of my phone. We're done. Yeah. What? Like, you. A day, you're putting aside a day on earth to fucking meal prep. Yeah. And also it's like, fine, meal prep.

Invite me over. We'll get drunk. While you meal prep, you know. Thursday's going to be looking a bit crazy because it'd be like a battery and a cucumber in a box. You just mean cook. I'm cooking. I'm cooking meals. I'm cooking enough food to last me for several meals this week.

Yeah. Meal brew. Oh. Oh, because you're a Jimbo. No. When does it be normalized to say that? It's so annoying. Yeah, it's this kind of idea of living the optimized life.

I think because cooking, like you can't be like a cunty cook. Yeah, you can. Well, like, obviously. Mama. But like, Nigella. No, cooking Mama. Cooking Mama. Hey, true.

But imagine if it was meal prep mama. Yeah, no. You know? And also meal prep sounds like you haven't finished making the meal. Yes. You're just prepping. No, I'm sorry, but like, when... Yeah.

Hate that. Also, it's funny thinking back because, you know, there was a period of my life where my lunch was made every day by my mother. Or on curse days by my father. But she wouldn't meal prep for the week ahead. She'd be like, I got up this morning, made you a sandwich and put it in a box. Yes. And then shove some other pre-packaged shit in there. Also, like, can you actually get real?

Because, like, leftovers does not mean that you meal prepped. It just means that, like, you made an amount of food and there was enough for this meal and the next meal. Yeah. That's just how cooking works. I don't know. Spaghetti. I split it into different Tupperware, ready for the week.

Congratulations, you're organized. Kill them. I hate it. Kill them. Did you see that guy? like what that's your activity in your exciting life I do meal prep. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, no shit. Everyone has to fucking prep their meal. Yeah. I'm not canceling pants for that. Well, like, oh, well, so what did you do on Sunday afternoon? Well, I got dressed. Yeah. Yes. Everyone did.

Went to the shower. Wiped my ass. And that was it. That was the day. Sometimes it takes a while. Oh, here we go. Milprice, Matt. Silently waiting. Silently waiting.

Go on. Give us your rebuttal. No, I was talking about wiping your hands. Oh. I didn't do meal prep. No. No one does. Jilda, where did that giant can of monster come from?

Zelda, where did that come from? I bought this at the 7-Eleven earlier. Oh, my God. She was prepping. She was doing some meal prepping. I was going to, I said I was going to, well, I said I was going to get a red bull for when my coffee was done. The straw doesn't even fit inside that giant fucking can. It's, it's so big.

Isn't that disgusting? She's holding the label of the monster energy drink towards me, as if she's trying to sell me something. Right. I was going to say huge enormous, but I stopped myself. It's huge normas? Yes. Is that the slogan now? No.

Bottoms up and the devil laughs. Okay. Yeah. Yes, so I will play GTA. Did you see the guy on cyberpunk 19, no, 2000, whatever? 2077. Yes. Nanu.

Yeah, I saw NAN. No, the guy who lived a normal life inside of cyberpunk and went to work. No. And for five days and then took two days off. No, but I love. It was so good. I watched the entire video and he started to just pretend that he was working and he would walk around and talk to all the customers. And their voices would switch between different people having the different.

voices. What shop did he work in? He worked in the, um, it was like a noodle shop. Cool. It was amazing. I, I mean, I played that game for maybe like 20 hours. Yeah. But if I only had it for 300. Yeah. And I would have had the true experience. It was a bit too, like, gunny for me. Yeah. Like, it was very like, what if I don't want to shoot everyone. Yeah. Because there was a bit more of a promise of like, tackle things as you like, but it was like, as long as it's guns. Yeah. Or crossbow. Yeah, but like, no. Yeah, you don't want to see people die.

I want more down. Like, not necessarily. I just want, I don't know, I wanted more to do rather than just like to kill it. I wanted to just experience life. Yeah. In a cyberpunk city. Now you'll be able to experience life in what city is it? I don't know.

Liberty City? No, where is GTA now? I don't know. They're going back somewhere that they went last time. Is it like the Florida one? they're going somewhere tropical. I don't know. Oh.

Well, I guess I'll go fuck myself up right up the edge. What about? No, I don't know. I've never actually really played GTA. Like, I've never owned one. It's in a fictional state. Of Leonida. San Andreas.

Which is meant to be, oh, it's Vice City. Oh. It's the modern day version of Vice City, which I never really loved as much as I like. as I liked. I was more of a son Andreas girl. I loved that LA vibe. You know? Chain link fences,

riding around on a bicycle. Hand glider? Yes. Cool. Fun. Jet ski? I also don't think I ever finished any of those games because I don't want to go on those missions.

I don't want to do all that. Yeah. Do you have to be like a thug? Zelda. What? That's a crazy thing to say. Is it? Zelda.

What? They're crims, aren't they? Crims? Thugs! God! Zelda, that is not a way to speak about these men. He's just trying to get his son back. Yeah. What?

I'm so excited to play this game. I'm going to play it forever. I'm going to get bored after 20 minutes. I'm going to turn it off. As soon as it's too hard. Yeah. You'll be fine. Matt, are you going to play it?

I would if I had any sort of gaming console. But could I play it with you at your house? Yeah. Yeah. We're going to do like a Twitch live stream. All right. We're going to be gamer girls now. This podcast is over.

Death to GTA. Death to GTA. Oh, I just want to know what the fuss is about. Most expensive video game ever made. It's going to be good. More money you spend on something, the better it is. Like, James was sweating. Famously, that is always the case.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Let's kill the world. I'm going to kill the world. Yeah. It's my week. All right.

Okay. So, my week, the classic hive collapse happens, right? Wait. Of bees? Yeah, bee hive collapse. You know, it's coming. It's an ecological disaster on the way. Yeah. But scientists away in a lab in, let's say Czechoslovakia, have developed a new type of bee that is hypervigilant, hyper, what is it, hyper sturdy, Like it's disease resistant. It's hearty.

It lives long. It is strong. But they don't realize perhaps too strong. Yeah. So the bee population recovers, but then it doesn't stop. And suddenly, there are bees everywhere. And they become hives of genetically engineered super bees. And everyone who would normally go into anaphylactic shock, they're fucked first.

But also, these bee stings venom is so. powerful that it kills you. And so like, you know, your throat closes over and your body goes into shutdown. But there would be times where like we'd be sitting here and the sky would go dark and we'd know that the swarm was coming. And they would block up the sky from like miles and miles away until they'd descend it upon the city and we'd be inside the house being like, no. But first people would be like, wait, is that a cloud?

Yeah. But it's like, that's moving too fast for a dark cloud. The hum. And then when they get to the house, they like ensconce the entire house. It's conceding every little crevasse and hole and sneaking in and then. This sounds like your experience at my wife's farm property. Yes, the moss. So that's the story.

And then eventually, even if you don't get stung by a. B, they have decimated all the resources on the earth. Sucked everything dry. Except there's just like giant honey and honeycomb on everything. Oh, honey. And what about Michael B. Jordan? Yeah, Michael B. Jordan is the only bee to make it safely away. Okay.

That's how the world ends. That's good. Yeah, thank you. Sorry, everyone. Lyndon B. Johnson? No, he's dead already. Oh, I'm doing. Okay, let's take a break and we'll be right back.

Hello. And welcome back. So, Zelda, we're doing our mystery one first. Oh, okay. We're doing our mystery one. Now, listen, on the way here, Zelda and I stopped, as we're oft-want to do at the 7-Eleven. Yes. And I got us a little object.

What? Each. Sorry, Matt. Yeah, sorry, Matt. I'm going to keep my eyes on the road. That's right. And from within these packages, I'd like you to decide what of these things gets into the bunker. So, listener, if you will, in a recent collaboration, Magic the Gathering has done a Marvel overlap.

Superheroes. Magic the Gathering, 14 cards. So I got a booster pack for each of us. Who's on the front cover of yours? I got Wolverine. Mine has Scarlet Witch. Which is why you have it. And so...

What? This is so cool. We now have 14 cards to choose from. All I bought in secret was that gigantic monster can. And I don't know... Where did you hide it? I just put it in my bag. Okay, I'm not going to look.

I'm going to do them one by one. Yes. So we have borough backup, create two, three, two white hero creature tokens with vigilance. That's good. Stolen Stark Tech flash when the equipment enters, attach it to a target

creature you control. They are indestructible into the end of term. Aim scientists, do you know anything about them? Yeah. When the creature enters, it connives. Draw a card, then discard a card. That sounds good. Cree Sentinel. Do you know what that is? Yeah. Reach?

Crean, alien race. Oh my God, we're going to get into magic the gathering. I'm so sad about these co-labs, but that's okay. Ariel Doombot, do you know what that is? Yeah. Flying. One, one. A doom bud.

Tiny. Victor von Doom's army. Ant man's army. When the creature enters, create a food token and the treasure token. Ultron drone. That sounds good. Yeah. Ultron drone.

That sounds good. Spidea woman. Spideon. Swarting. Sharp scoundrel. The Wiccan is... Scarlet Witch's son. The swords, man.

Oh, I got the thing, Ben Grimm. He's a legendary creature, human hero. 7-7 with trample. That's good. With trample? Super Skrell. That's it. Take up the shield.

Put a plus one counter on target creature. It gains lifelink and indestructible into the end of the own. Cool. A gorgeous holographic swamp card, full bleed. Swamp card. Like a manor. Yeah.

And then insect, I got a one-one insect creature. Cool. So that was it. I got the thing, I guess, is the most recognizable Marvel property again. What? You think... Oh, no, I suppose you're right. You got a Hulkling?

Yeah. Is Billy in there? Is Wicken in there? Or is it just Hulkling? It's just Hulkling. Can you describe Hulkling for the listener? The burgeoning bruiser, hookling. He's got vigilance.

He's a legendary creature, Cree Skrull Hero. Yeah. His name's Teddy. Whenever another creature, you control enters, if it has greater power or toughness than Hulkling, put a plus one plus one counter on Hulkling. And his flavour text is, we all named ourselves after the original Avengers.

I picked the Hulk. Be honest, wouldn't you? Yeah, because he's a little faggot. He is wearing a little faggy pink, no purple leotard. He's gay. With orange hair and fingerless gloves on one hair. You got a gay card.

That's crazy. Is that gay? Yes. I just like to know for the person's gay. Okay, now I've got Heroin Training Card when a creature enters draw a card. Oh, that's boring. Decoy ploy. Oh, I don't like these.

Yeah, that's fine. Return your air, whatever. Cree Commandos, also boring. I hate to Cree. Hydro assault robot. Yeah, that's fine. Giant growth. Target creature gets plus three and plus three until the end of turn.

Cap called for Giant Man, not Ant Man. Giant Man. Hawkeyes bow. Bo. Blazing crescendo. Oh, it looks like Skylo Witch is casting a spell there. Iron Lad. I don't want Iron Lad.

He's also a young Avenger, just like Hulkling, but Iron Lad's boring. Supervillain lockup. Rick Jones, destined sidekick. Bullseye. Oh, no, Bullseye's pretty hot. Bullseye in the later season of Daredevil. He's the villain, isn't he? Fucking hot.

That man is out of control. There was this whole episode where the first like five minutes is just him living his cyberpunk 277 life. He like gets up and like cracks his eggs and says hi to his, you know, like neighbor. He's so hot. That man's out of control. Absorbing man. I hate absorbing men.

Frozen and ice. Hey, this is my shiny card. This is Captain America. PIM technologies. Did you enjoy what you got? What's your shiny card? Captain America Frozen in Ice. Is that good?

No. Enchant creature. When this aura enters, tap enchanted creature. Enchanted creature loses all abilities and can't be untapped. Wow. What's your shiny? The land. The manor card.

Okay. At least Bullseye is hot, and he looks relatively hot in this image. I can't believe that. You know, this Ben Grimm card is saying it sells for $1.43 on eBay. Another one says that it's selling for $8 on eBay. Am I going to be rich? Maybe. Fucking hell, we're rich Zelda.

Finally. That thing. Oh, someone's selling it for $25 on eBay. Can you please look up a shiny frozen in ice? Okay, let's find out. Frozen in... Matt, how much do you think? my frozen in ice card will go for

14,000. Do you want to buy it? No. No, no, I've got many. Ooh, it's saying it's selling for $2.95 or $25, someone's selling it for $25. What if I sold it for 30? Sell it for 30, see what happens. Or someone selling it for 50 cents or 30 cents.

It doesn't bode well for a whole range of prices. Oh, well, can I take the cover of my packet? You can have all of this, as long as you go and share some with Matt. No, no, I mean for the bunker. Oh. Like, I want to put the rapper in. No cards. But at least you're not disappointed by bad cards.

You just have the cool image of Skylit Witch. I love Magic the Gathering so much, even though I don't really have as much of a connection, well, I don't have any connection to it anymore. But the thing that I find so sad is how much Wizards of the Coast has brought in all of this kind of, co-labs with like because like I guess I can vaguely forgive the the Lord of the Rings co-lab because it's like magic the gathering is so entirely inspired by the world of Tolkien

so it's like okay you get one yeah but then like they've done teenage mutant ninja turtles they've done like all this stuff and I just find it to be like really disappointing they have this huge, huge Final Fantasy Colab going on Maybe for the last couple years Some of those cards go for a lot of money A lot I think like it's just

The thing that was so cool about magic Is that like it felt so boundless And they had to keep thinking of new Fantasticical things to go into that world That were inspired by different things But like they were always original IP Yeah And so there's something just a bit sad about it being like, now it's just regular.

Yeah. Now it's just like everything else. But I'll put in Hulkling, the burgeoning bruiser. Yeah, let's put in Hulkling. Vigilance. Cool. Aren't you so furious at our increasingly camp Marvel roster within the bunker? Mystique, Emma Frost, and now Hulkling?

That's the New Avengers, the New Avengers. Wow. I'd watch that. I kind of, wait, is that a show? We'll write that show. Yeah. What do they do? You know what?

Can I say this? Mystique did an appear in season one of X-Men 97. First three episodes of season two, she wasn't in. Living up to her name, quite mysterious. Do you think it's going to be revealed that she's been there the whole time? Yes. Who do you think she is? There's like this evil woman.

Yeah. It'll be her. Oh. But it's good. That's good. What if it was Wolverine? I mean, that would also be good. But I think if it was Wolverine, she would have had sex with morph by now.

Yeah. But also half of season one, you thought it was Jean Grey, but it was actually Madeline Pryor. So they've already done a switcheroo kind of. But I mean, Madeline Pryor is a clone of Jean Grey, not a shapeshift. Oh. Well, of course. The goblin queen, Madeline Pryor. I thought you were the goblin queen.

Hulkling. Okay, that's great. Thank you for the cards. That's actually very cute. It's fun, right? Now listen, I want this. What's this? Yeah.

That mystique theme. So good. That will be the new sound of the new Avengers. Yes. You know she's in, Doomsday. Which one? Oh. Yeah.

Not Jennifer Lawrence, please. They couldn't afford her. Oh. We'll be right back. Hello and welcome back, listener. Hello. Did you enjoy that? Is that the kind of content you like on the show?

completely visual things that we're enjoying. Matt, for you, how was that? I was captivated the whole time. Oh, amazing. Seriously. Oh, good. I'm not being sarcastic. Hey, listen.

I wasn't. I wasn't. Hey, Matt, if you want to take this out off air, we can do that. Take it out. Okay, now I'm going to send through a link for another visual... A link to the past. Okay. Oh no, I've lost my link because I was looking up stupid GTF six.

One moment. We're going to do which character from Star Fox goes into the bunker. So, listener, Star Fox, what a franchise. One of the best. What is the law of Star Fox? Because I knew about that N64 game, but I never had it. Oh, really? No.

I think it just felt a bit like, it felt a bit off. Like, it felt like it wasn't main roster Nintendo. True, true. It felt a bit like, oh, and then there's also Star Fox. Yeah. But then when she showed up in Smash Brothers, I was like, oh, who is this? Well, I felt like, yeah, it's actually, you know, Smash Brothers was so All-Stars coded, drag race All-stars coded.

Yeah. Because it was like, this girl that went out in episode two of season three is now, like, in the main All-Stars, and you have to kind of be like, well, but who the fuck is she? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then by the end of the season, you're like, oh, I love Tatte. I know. Yes. Yes. Totally. That, of course, is not a description that applies to Star Fox, but... Who what... Okay, if Star Foxx, the eponymous Star Foxx, what's his...

Which is the actual Star Fox MacLeod? Yeah. If Fox McLeod showed up on a drag race season, what is the drag queen that best represents Fox McLeod? As far as, like, level of fame, level of quality. Yeah. She's not. She's B. She's B tier. B tier. But also, like, I'm trying to do a personality match as well. I'm going to say, like, Morgan McMicha's.

Oh, okay. It's that kind of work. It's like, if you know, you really know. Yeah. But also, she's not the best performer on the show. Yeah, right. Yeah. In a way, you know what I mean?

Mm-hmm. Okay. So, Star Fox, there was, like, Super Nintendo, then, like, the Queen Bee in Australia or Power. regions. It was Lailat Wars because they're protecting the Lailat system. But internationally it was Star Fox 64. Then there's been a few other Star Fox games through the years. Most of them pretty bad. They were Star Fox Adventures where you ran around on dinosaur planet. And then there were a few other kind of in the sky like Star Fox 64 style like not remakes but games. They've never been

very good unfortunately. But they've just re-released Star Fox. for Nintendo Switch 2. And they have done this hideous art style that matches these old 90s ads where the ads were all puppets. Oh my God. And so that's why they look like this, which I think is so cool.

And even though they're all a little bit ugly, it's like amazing. They just look so cool and not hot. I feel like all characters are always hot these days, but these guys aren't. Like Fox has a big hunchback because he's like a fox walking around on two legs. Yeah.

Oh, it's so good. Anyway, so we have the core roster, which is Fox, a Fox, Falco Lombardi, which is a Falcon. Falcon, oh, no, that's not him. Wrong one, sorry. Who does that? Captain Falcon. And where's he from?

Oh, my God, Captain Falcon is from Zero. What are those games? Racing games. He's a racing car driver. Slippy Toad. A toad. Peppy hair Then you've got the enemy

So everyone has their match In the Star War So Wolf, Leon Who is this fantastic Camillion character Then Pygma Pygma is the evil one that betrayed Fox's father

And then Andrew Who kind of sucks Andrew Oikoni Connie Then Like Andros is like the main villain of Star Fox, who's this, like, evil scientist gone mad and trying to take over the lilac system. And then there are a few extra characters. So General Pepper is, like, who tasks Star Fox to

protect the galaxy. Yeah. James is Fox's dad, who dies before the game. Then Rob 64 drives the Great Fox, which is the, like, mothership of the Star Fox group. That's fun. And then there's just, like, Bill, who pops up in a few levels and cat. Who is... Maybe. A Thalco's ex-girlfriend. And... Oh, that thing's not a thing.

Don't worry about that. That's just in the tutorial. It's like a raccoon thing. You don't like Yaru Dupon? No. Really? No. Look at how cute it is.

It's not even in it. It's in like 30 seconds. 30 seconds still counts. You let Yaru alone. She just skipped over it, too. She wasn't even going to acknowledge it. Because it's not even... Don't look at Yaru.

Matt, you say your favorite, and I'll give you some of their backstory. I don't know any of these. I don't think I've played this either. Yeah. It's in outer space. Fox McLeod, Falco Lombardi, Slippy Toad. Yeah. Slippy Toad looks cool.

Slippy is fun. Slippy is the engineer. Slippy... See, I would like the enemy characters, though. Yeah, well, they... And... Leon Powalski. I fucking love Leon.

In the original game, like the lines of dialogue, because also it was one of the first video games that had like full voice acting. And like the inflection and every line lives in my memory. Yeah. And so playing this new one is a little bit hard because obviously different voice actors. And yeah, the inflection isn't quite the same. And the, yeah, it suffers a bit of like modern voice acting idas where they all just sound like generic anime characters.

But in the original, Leon is my favorite. Anoying bird. I am the great Leon, et cetera. You know, that's a great, that's a great quote. Wait, what species is Leon? Camelian. Oh, he does seem fun. Does he ever do chameleon things?

No. Oh. none of them ever do anything they've pilot ships so that mostly like their animal qualities aren't really although falco sometimes says that he would never drive a submarine because he likes to stay in the air and as a bird that's because that makes sense i recently there's something about this star fox thing that's triggering a memory yeah because recently on greg johnson's making channel um you know gregg who made our computer head for our show yeah yeah yeah he's He was making a spaceship from a comic that was then turned into a cartoon in the 80s called Bucky O'Hare,

which is a show about a rabbit who pilots a ship through space to protect thing. And like all the different spaceship drivers are played by animals. Oh, yeah. Is Star Fox a rip-off of Bucky O'Hare? Maybe. Holy shit. Get Japan on the phone. You have their number going.

I like Pygma. Pygma. Yeah. I feel like Pygma would do space and then also compete on series 13 of Project Runway. So Pygma is a big old pig. Pygma was in the original Star Fox lineup of James Peppy and Pygma. And when they went to take down Andros, they were double-crossed by Pygma. And that's how James died.

The dad. Yeah. The dad of the fuck. And then Peppy Hair escaped and then helped raise. Fox into the man he is today. And Pygma is still around? Yeah. Is Pygma doing well?

Well. It depends if I'm up against Pygma. Because I would take him down. You'd kill Pygma. Pygma is like Peppie's nemesis. Nothing beats the smell of bacon in the morning. Whoa. Yeah.

Pygma? I love the name, Pygma. It's Pygma. Matt, who's your favorite? I like Leon. It looks the coolest. That's the chameleon. Yeah.

Second in command of Star Wolf. I also like General Pepper. Pepper is, Pepper's great. And I just got the joke that he's not Sergeant Pepper. Yes, General Pepper. Yeah. And a big Labrador. Actually, I do like raccoons, and there's a raccoon.

Yaru-de-pon. Yes, man. I like it. Yes. Okay, well, my vote is for Yaru-Dupon. Oh, my God. What's wrong with Yaru-Dipon? Nothing, but it's just like the two, it's not even a character.

It's just the tutorial computer system. Yaru. In the shape of a record. And you do the tutorial once? Yeah. You know, it's like when Judy Dench won't. the Oscar for Shakespeare in love, but was only in like three seconds. Yarrow came through, snatched our hearts and left.

Yarrow! Depon! Vee... DePont. Going rogue episode about Artemis Fowl. Yes. Girl. How, like, how incredible.

So good. Like, what a story! So good. And just, oh, so many things. But it did remind me that Judy Denton is in that film. Yes. And doing evil, evil fairy. Growspeak for the whole thing.

Yeah. Unironically. Yeah. I just, maybe that was the first thing that broke my heart, like, in that way. Because you love that evil boy. I love Artemis Fow. The books. Yeah.

They were some of my favorite books. It's so fun. And it's just like, I don't know, kids media. Yeah. No, no. Kids are getting spoon fed a lot of shit these days. Yeah. And they're missing out on bad people.

Yes. Potentially upsetting people. Yes. Yeah. What's wrong with? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Anyway. Why was Judy Dent talking like that? Was there like a character reason why she was talking, oh, husky and evil? I think it was she was taking the role as discussed something. It's the kind of surly sergeant. Yeah. You know, the police chief. Anyway.

Whatever. So what? We're going to put in Yarrow. Yaru. I mean, they can't fight us. Two against one. But, like, just to be... It looks cool.

Just to be clear. Like, it's not even a character in the game. He looks so cool, though. I reckon Yaru has fans. I can't believe it. Does Yaru not have fans? I thought you would have said, Cat, the scrappy ex-girlfriend of Falco.

It looks like Princess Caroline from Boja Korsman. That's a little bit, yeah. Yeah. Sorry? Well, I just found a Reddit called Everyone Loves Yaru. Fucking hell. When you say you found it,

did you mean you refreshed it after you posted that? To receive incoming messages, tap that touchscreen. Yeah, that's a quote from the tutorial. the game. She's always saying the cream. Chill engineer slash CEO of an arms manufacturer. And this only has two comments

and 12 likes. Okay. No, wait, Zelda, you get to choose. No, it's fine. It's two against one. No, what would you choose? As per normal. What would you choose, though? Leon. Anowing bird. I am the great

Leon. It's like one of my favorite lines. There's been very few times in my life where I've met Leon, but I've said that to every Leon that I've ever met. Also, did you say that Cherry Wallace has finally revealed her new YouTube studio? The video came out 10 hours ago. I cannot fucking wait to watch and hate every second. I think you need to give the people some context.

Listener, there is. We've talked about her in passing. Yeah. There's a demon. masquerading as a British woman. She got her skins. Her name is Cherry Wallace. And she runs a YouTube channel that primarily in the past was like Harry Potter, like, look at this thing that I bought that has the Harry Potter logo on her.

I mean, before that she was doing like cosmetics or whatever. But yeah, then like really lent into the magical world of Pottington. Well, she loved to collect, you know. shiny pigments floating in cups. Yes. Then she opened a disgusting magic store. So then she opened a magic store with a really hot gay guy from Ireland or whatever. Scotland.

Scotland, sure. And then now she's got a stupid magic shop. An unseen fiancé? Yes. We never see. And she does. It opens a lot of Christmas Advent calendars that are themed. It's a really busy time for her.

And she has, yeah, she seems like a real piece of work. Yeah. Very, like, knows how to present for the camera, but if you watch with even like half of a discerning eye open, you'll see the demon that lies within. Anyway, she a couple months ago now made this big video where she was like, I'm changing my studio up because I'm trying to distance myself from JK.

because the background of her YouTube channel was like pretty much all Harry Potter. Like she would like maybe like one in 10 videos would be about Harry Potter stuff these days. But you know, the set was still very Harry Potter coded. And thankfully, you know, yes, good. Move away from that awful wench in her moldy castle. So like that's all good.

But yeah, it was this whole thing where she's like emotionally taking down everything. and whatever. And now we finally have the new studio, and I cannot wait to see it. I also just love when this woman, who I also turn my eyes away from, like it's this,

there is a specific way she describes things and interacts with things, where she'll pick up like an antique book. And she's like, wow, doesn't look so old and magical. without like ever kind of like the object itself is kind of only as important as like it's how much it looks like a vague idea of what magical is but like the whole like she has no idea of like the interior of the book oh it doesn't matter but it's just like look at how look at how positively magical and potiony this looks yes and then like so everything she walks around and touch and

she's just like look at this scroll it's positively so old and you're just like... It's so whimsical and magical. Yeah. And what's this? It's so shallow. Yeah. She's like the depth of her interest in like these things is just this dark academic aesthetic.

Yeah. That it's hard to tell because obviously people's interest change. So to be so locked in on something on YouTube, like it kind of means if you change your interest, you lose your audience. Yeah. because they're watching you for that content. So you'd have to feel a bit trapped. But it's become a little bit unclear if she still likes that shit, like, at all. Because she always tries, she tries to do these, like, book review things now.

She gets, like, 50% of her channel is, like, monthly subscription boxes from different things. One of them is a book thing, mostly fantasy books, but still. But, yeah, I always wonder, like, in her house outside of the studio. rooms. Like, does she have like a broomstick on the wall? She loves magic? I don't think. She's got a billy bookshelf. Yeah. She's got a lot of billy bookshel. Yeah. The whole rest of the house is giving Billy bookshelf. Yeah. Oh yeah. And oh, oh, yuck. It's giving like, I closed the door to the office and then I step away. Yeah. Like, I can't have that stuff in the rest of my house. Mm-mm. Yeah. Oh, but I also, I think,

Like big studio move for YouTuber is such a like, you're stepping away from being a real person. And now you've become a full-time YouTuber. Yeah. And this is when your soul will begin to die. Yeah. There's this guy that I watch, like, Lego guy. And he just had, like, he moved house and had built this, like, massive garage

that is, like, decked out now or, like, being decked out for his, like, new studio space. because he makes huge mock-ups. And in order to do that, you need, like, a massive inventory of parts, which means you need a massive storage space for parts. And they're just like... And I enjoy his content. He's like, fine. But it's so anticlimactic because it's not a decorated space.

It's just like, here's my warehouse, and here's the shelving that I'm going to put up. And then I'm going to fill it with plastic bins that are full of Lego. Like, and that's all that could ever... ever be. Yeah. But. Yeah.

Well, yeah. It was when Sophia and I got the BuzzFeed girl transferred to her new giant studio in like Phoenix or wherever the fuck she lives, they recreated her shitty home. Like fucking Nathan Field of the rehearsal like to an excruciating detail. Like a plain white wall with like a credenza behind it and like a single. strand of like fairy light, dangling from like an unseen curtain railing. But they recreated it. So when people watch her and she's in her gigantic, like thousands upon thousands of dollars studio, they still feel like she's in her shitty lounge room being a

real person. But the time when she was able to be a real person was a long time ago. And any ability she has to relate to members of the general public died. But she. But she she still is on such a like precarious rope bridge across because she isn't like an entertainer or like she is but like she's a YouTuber still. Yes. So all the money still comes from this kind of like very volatile. You cannot make a mistake. You are the product.

If the product, you know, if you change in the public's estimation at all, if people fall out of love with you, you are financially destroyed forever. Yeah. Which is unlike so many jobs. Yeah. And they just, I think it destroys your life eventually, slowly. I also don't like the way that she'll just tip all of the candle in. And then later has to fish out all the like metal butts.

Yeah. That freaks me out. You know? I know, but the listener doesn't. Of course they do. She combines Yankee candles and makes the world's biggest fucking candle or something. But when you melt them down, she doesn't, because she's adding. such an enormous amount.

She doesn't want to fish out every little, you know, like when you melt down a candle in this little... The butt. Anyway. Yeah. But actually, you know what? It dawned on me recently with the whole Trixie and Katia starting a Patreon thing.

Did you see this? No. They started a Patreon. Yeah. Which they had kind of always been dubious about in the past. Oh. And they started a Patreon and the comment section where they announced their new incoming Patreon

was scathing. Oh. Like, I have never seen this level of vitriol for Trixie and Cartia. What? People just be like, I'm sorry, but I have no money and I'm a lesbian living in Detroit. How the fuck do you expect me to pay for your fucking Patreon? Da-da-da-da-da. And people are like, there's a cost of living crisis going on.

How can you do this to your queer viewers? What? And everyone's angry. To be fair, to that everyone being angry, despite the fact that it is insane. Is the $5 tier gets you ad-free versions of bald, the beautiful. Yeah. The $10 tier gets you that plus additional, some additional thing.

Yeah. And then the $20 tier, $20 USD, gets you a, the same stuff as there, and then access to their new show, like they're all-stars to reviews. Oh. And that kind of stuff. Yeah, yeah. And some additional shit. So it's like all very paywalled.

It's not like, here's a donation option. No, no. It's like you've got to go up to at least $10 before you're getting the All-Stars One stuff. But I'm like, yeah? People are so mad because like Trixie's a millionaire. I'm like, yeah, but she doesn't have to give you anything. No. Like if she is making a product in a form of content and you would like to engage with it

and it costs money, then you have to pay. And I think it's like they'll figure it out. Like the free leader like this will this will kind of tell them oh you can't do that. Your friends are not going to follow you there. But at the same time it's like the entitlement with which people are like saying it like they're denying them access to clean drinking water and shelter and food. It's like I'm poor and there's a cost of living crisis and you're like, yes. So you don't spend $20 on a Patreon.

Yes. Don't do that. Yeah. If you want to like, you can just watch the free content on YouTube, which will still be going up. Yeah. Don't spend the money. Yes.

Because like it's not healthcare, hon. No. You knowing about what Katja felt during Alaska's meltdown in All Stars 2 is not a necessary thing to your survival as a human being. So it shouldn't affect you emotionally that you don't have access to it. Yes. What do you fucking mean? People are crazy.

like the way that people have to frame, they can't just be like, that's too expensive. Fuck you. Instead they have to frame it as like, I'm out here suffering every day. And you have the audacity to do this to me, a woman with a nut allergy. Like, shut the fuck up.

You had me just say like, you bitch, this is too expensive. Yeah. That's all you need to say. No, I am dying. Eat my hair. I am dying, eat my ass. Well, Yaru, apparently.

Finally, say the full name. Yaru, Dippon. Depon. Le Bon Ton Roulet. I'm so glad you got Yaru in. Oh, my God. Yaru. We'll be right back.

Hello, listen, now. Welcome back to the channel. Hello. And I hope you've gone behind the paywall this week. Oh God You don't want to hear the ads on this podcast Yeah, our Patreon's even worse What is they're paying

For Well they're paying for the privilege to pay Yeah exactly Our final topic for discussion today Listener Is which Like celebrity insult Or like

What? Celebrity Slight Yeah Comment gets into the bunker. Yes. Okay, so obviously this came to mind because we have the incredible gowns,

beautiful gowns by Aretha Franklin. For those of you who don't know, there's an interview with Aretha Franklin when she's going through the new generation of pop divas this was years ago, and she's going through and she's like complimenting all the other divas and she's like, she's an amazing singer. Ah, she can really perform.

And then she's like, And what do you think of Taylor Swift? And she's like, gowns. Beautiful gowns. Yeah. That's quite good. There's another classic, Mariah Carey, stating, I don't know her in regards to Ms. Hennifer Lopez. Did Jennifer ever come back with anything on that?

I mean, it's been brought up many times through the years. Yeah. Yeah. But I can't, I can't recall a direct rebuttal. I mean, that says everything you need. There was Madonna calling Lady Gaga reductive. Look it up. Cryptically in that interview.

That was incredible. What else? Matt, do you have some? The only one I know is when... Was it Nicky Minaj called it Miley Cyrus for something? She's had a lot to say about me in the press. Yeah, but I never know what actually... she said in the press. What did she actually say?

What did Miley say to piss her off? Yeah, I don't know. I guess that wasn't really an insult. That was just like her calling her out. I thought it was funny. Then Miley's just like, well, well, we all work in this industry. Um, I think, I think, I, Unfortunately, okay, so this comes with a caveat that this woman is incredibly toxic. And we've discussed her before.

Who? But she is one of the greatest wordsmiths. Nikki Mina. No. Of course I'm talking about Azealia Banks. Oh. Oh. Who just, when she is on her game, and listen, I do not support the works of this woman.

Why I support the works of this woman? She's an amazing musician, unfortunately. But I do not support some of the sentiments and disgusting things. she's had to say about people in the past. But God damn it, when she wraps a tweet around a person, the things she says. So this is her on Iggy Azalea. Iggy Azalea is like my albino child.

I randomly gave birth to in a prehistoric African village during Pangaea. My early human brain thought she was demonic because of her albinism. So I wrapped her in a melanji leaf. and left her in a cave miles away from the village. Sorry. Yeah, that was pretty good. What the fuck do you mean? This is incredible.

Why did you say that? Oh, my God. I mean, this isn't really the same thing, kind of. But you know, that time that Madonna was having an interview and then, oh, my God. Courtney Love. love, like, randomly. Crashes it and, like, starts throwing things at Madonna from down on the...

And then she comes up and joins the interview shortly. Yes. You know that one? And she just hates that she's there. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. That's good.

What about Kim Cottrell versus SJP? Could you read that comment, Shula? I think the key one is, like, you're not my family. You're not my friend. That was good and heartbreaking. Oh. You know? Yeah.

Um, yes. The lamest one, which was in, Adam Levine was calling out, um, saying, recycling old art for a younger generation doesn't make you an artist, it makes you an art teacher. This was like Adam Levine talking about Lady Gaga and her applause song. And then she said underneath as her like,

Sasserrelli come back. Uh-oh, the art police is here. I'm like, don't make me. with Adam Levine. Back when Rihanna had Twitter, do you remember this golden day? Kind of. So, is it Sierra?

Yeah. Gave an interview where she said that Rihanna wasn't the nicest after running into her at a party. And Rihanna on Twitter said, my bad C, did I forget to tip you? Wait, I just found the Madonna quote from that Courtney Love Institute. Courtney Love is in dire need of attention right now.

She's throwing her compact at me. Help Madonna. And then Sierra responded to Rihanna saying, trust me, Rihanna, you don't want to see me on or off the stage. And then Rihanna said, good luck with booking that stage you speak of. Sorry. Are you kidding me? If Rihanna said that to me, I would die.

Like, that is too beautiful. Oh. It's good. Mariah Carey's done all the good ones. Yeah, Mariah is really good. It was one she said about Nikki Minow. She said, I didn't know she's saying. I thought she rapped or whatever.

I love adding or whatever And then Maraarii Carey said about Jennifer Lopez If I had the luxury of not actually having to sing my songs I'd do that too When Jennifer Lopez says she gets eight hours sleeper per night It's pretty good Yeah, it's pretty good Um, Bet Midler

Kim Kardashian tweeted a nude selfie today If Kim wants us to see a part of hope we've never seen she's going to have to swallow the camera. And Kim Kardashian, hey, Bit Midler, I know it's past your bedtime, but if you're still up and reading this, send nudes, hashtag just kidding. Did you see Bet Midler's... Bet Midler's... Bet Midwa.

Her post the other day being like, in my day, we would have all gone and volunteered and cleaned that mirror pool or whatever it is. the pool of freedom or whatever. At the White House. Oh, the reflecting pill. Instead of the White House. Everything. But then Bet Miller also has been posting AI videos of her

Sanderson sister changing into like Versacea outfits. She doesn't know. She, yeah. What do you think about that whole mirror pool thing? The reflecting pill. Whatever it's called. That's crazy. It's insane.

Have you seen all the pictures of the dying ducks in there? No. All the dead duck things? Oh my God. Because the water's all full of peroxide. Jeez. That's just... It's just a symbol of how things are going over there, isn't it?

It's a metaphor. Yes. It's a true metaphor. The issue is it was $14 million of American taxpayer money. Yeah. And they put a pool liner in, a blue pool liner. Yeah. Over what was, I think, granite.

And so the way it was explained to me is that the granite, because it's a porous rock or whatever, would seep water every year. So they just lose gallons of water. But it also formed part of like a filtration. Yeah. Because it would filter through the rock. Yep. Whatever. Yeah.

And then by putting this like completely sealed pool liner in, it was to stop the water leak and whatever. So they're having to replenish, because they pull it from a nearby river. But then because all this like bioactive water was coming in, it immediately bloomed algae because it's just sitting there in stagnant water. Yes. Because they're meant to be a completely still plain of water. Yeah. Also in complete 24, well, not 24-7, 12-7 sunlight. Yes.

And like, it's meant to be reflective. So it's like meant to be a sheet. Yes. And then it immediately bloomed algae. And then the pool, like, bottom that they were meant to have was, like, peeling off. Yes. Incredible. It's cool.

But also, it was meant to be American flag blue. Mm-hmm. And so the Guardian has been really shady and has, like, been taking a little color dropper tool to it every day and being, like, how close is it to the American flag blue today? as it goes slowly more and more. Oh my God, I have not seen that. It gets greener and greener every day. And they, like, have it on an American flag. So you could just see how insane it looks.

Oh, that's great. Oh, my God, it's wild. So Lana Del Rey told Azalea Banks. She's pretty shady as well, isn't she? Yeah, you know the Addy. Pull up any time and say it to my face. But if I were you, I wouldn't. I won't not fuck you the fuck up, period.

Banks, you could have been the greatest female rapper alive, but you blew it. Don't take it out on the only person who had your back. What about this? Elton John, saying that Madonna's Die Another Day was the worst Bond tune ever. Which is a lie. That's a lie. I'm going to die another day. Then Azalea replied to Lana and said,

first we need to call her surgeon who did the pointy Michael Jackson nose and asked for some Kaibela for those chicken patties. Next, we need her to head over to Instagram and invest in some flat tummy co lollipops and a $20 waist trainer. Jesus. And then Lana said, I'll send you my surgeon's number and a good psychiatrist, I know in L.A., your psych meds aren't working.

Yeah. These people. I haven't got anything better to do. And then, as earlier said, hey, where's that pull-up tweet? I'm talking to my lawyer. And then Lana Del Rey said, tell him it's a promise, not a threat. Oh, my God. What about this from Scher in regards to Madonna?

She's unbelievably creative because she's not unbelievably talented. Oh, brutal. That's good. Does Cher hate Madonna a lot? I don't think Cher hates anyone. I think she's just like... She just shady on everyone. She just doesn't feel the need to, like, suffer anyone's bullshit,

particularly because she came up before Madonna. And I think, like, there's, like, a real, like, younger pop stars tend to have a bit more of a reverence. And then older, people older, just like, who was this young upstart? Yeah. I just want to tap in as well with one of those iconic feuds, which was Joan Crawford and Betty Davis.

Oh, yes. And I love Betty Davis so much. And they always had a lot to say about each other. And Betty Davis always had the better things to say because she was incredibly witty. Why am I so good at playing bitches? I think it's because I'm not a bitch. Maybe that's why Joan Crawford always plays ladies.

Clever. And then Joe Crawford says, She has a cult. And what the hell is a cult except a gang of rebels without a cause? I have fans. There's a big difference. And then Betty Davis. I wouldn't piss on Joan Crawford if she was on fire.

Fuck. That's a winner. That's great. Joan Crawford cries a lot. Her tears must be very close to her. Her tear ducks must. be very close to her bladder. Jesus.

Joan has slept with every male star at MGM except for Lassie. Well, at Lacey spit or that. Except for Lassie. Betty Davis, you should never say bad things about the dead. You should only say good.

John Crawford is dead. Good. Sorry That's amazing Pretty good I just Yeah So what are you feeling

What do we need What's good for the environment Down in our bunker Courtney love throwing compacts at people I agree I love I love Yeah

Um Hmm I mean I don't know her Is like So good Yeah. But you know what's almost one better? What?

It's like, it's not a celebrity dissing a celebrity, but he has become infamous. It's like when Jailor returned to her childhood home, the man in the house was like, who are you? I'm Jennifer. I used to live here. Up there. All right. Well, that was pretty good.

Okay, maybe that guy. Because it's even more insulting because he genuinely has no idea who. She is. Yeah. Whereas Mariah, I hazarded guess that you were aware. She does. She does know. That story is so fucked up.

Yeah, okay. I like that. Well, put in that guy. I'll put in that guy. Yeah. Sweeping his landing or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's pretty good.

Yeah. My name's Jennifer. I used to live up there. And Jennifer Lopez. Okay. Great. Bye. Bye.

No, just go into the next segment. That's it. Is this it? Yes. Oh, we did such a good show. Yeah. Is that right, Matt? Sometimes she gets ahead of us.

Hey. We've done three amazing segments today. These might be two of our worst episodes back to back. This one's probably the worst one. Matt's going to cut out all those silences, though. It'll feel really zippy. Yeah. And he's going to download all those as YouTube clips and put the sound in.

Yeah. And he'll add a score to this episode. Yes. Okay. I'm sorry about this. everyone. It's actually your fault listener. Yeah.

Where's the speak hole? Fuck you. Where's the fanfic? Fuck you. Are we in this together? Are you just watching us drown? Yeah. Throw us a ring.

Just going to stand there and watch me and burn. Sorry? Oh. That's all right because I love the way it hurts. This week. Okay. We have going into the bunker. Could we do that song and you do the M&M?

but. Eminem? Yeah. I, we can, no, if we're doing the Dido Eminem song, I'm Dido, you're Eminem. I'm not doing the Dido Eminem song, we're doing, just going to stay there. That's Rihanna. That's Rihanna. Well, then I'm definitely not doing it. Yeah, you're doing it.

I don't want to do Rihanna song. Why? I'm lukewarm on Rihanna. That's crazy. No. That's insane. I wouldn't even do her song with Shakira, and I've been listening to that on Reepy lately. But it's Rihanna, you know

It's just not my diva You don't like a Barbadian princess Okay, that's not Part of the equation of why I don't like Rihanna Okay I don't also don't dislike Rihanna I just like, I don't want to She's flawless

That's why you didn't respond enough To her Rihanna tweets That's because I just I feel nothing She's so cunty Yeah I liked her Smash Brothers Sorry

Smash Brothers Was she in the DLC? But the Super Bowl with like the floating platforms. Oh, true. I like that. Does that count? Okay.

Let's finish this episode. This week, we're putting in our good friend, gay Hulk. Hulkling. Yeah. That's hilarious. I forgot about that. Then we're putting in Yaru DePon,

the tutorial character who is in Star Fox for one month. become a huge depon fan. Fucking out. Like not even like, it also doesn't re-agre, it's not like it's five seconds every five hours. No, no, you do the tutorial like one time. I love that.

And then you might, so you do that once. Yaru. Sounds like a real bunker character. Sounds like you fucking can't get on board. Even in Lila was he didn't even have a name. Yaru. Because there was no need. It was just the picture. It's in the bunker now for all time.

And then we have... That man. That man saying... I don't know who Jennifer is. Yeah. Okay. What a great episode. Yeah.

Thank you all so much. Dave, we said it was the worst episode. That was five seconds ago. You changed your mind. Yeah. After remembering that you tortured me with that stupid Star Fox character. Yaroux de Pond. Oh.

French. She's Quebec. Yaru de Pond. Okay. Okay. Death to Everyone was recorded at Natural Habitat Studios by Matches. Our theme song and music was provided to us by Ediecentric and Angus Leslie. If you have something to say to us, send it to us at death to everyone part of Gmail.com.

And won't you speak into the hole at speakpipe.com slash death to everyone? Or support us on Patreon. When no matter what you pay, the amount of content is abysmally the same. At death to everyone.com. That's test to it. Wait. Shut up. Okay.

Goodbye!