Death To Everyone - Death To... STI's, Lighting & Trump Ambassadors

Episode Date: January 21, 2025

Listener, welcome back. This week we discuss which STI is in the bunker, being spread around as humans try and repopulate the numbers extinguished in the apocalypse. Lighting - very important for a nice selfie. And finally which of Trump's Inauguration performers will get into the bunker? Listen carefully and find out! Follow us, won't you? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.patreon.com/deathtoeveryone⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/deathtoeveryonepod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/mslazysusan⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.instagram.com/zeldamoon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Death To Everyone is recorded at Natural Habitat Studios by Matt Sheers. ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.naturalhabitatstudios.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Hello, hello, listener. That's right. Or should I say, hello listener. Um, wait, wait, let me get this right. Oh my God. This is so embarrassing. Yeah. Um, Oh, pip, pip pipip. I'll see you in the fullness of time. Yeah. Oh, yes. Yes. Actually, no. What was my posh because we were watching Come Dine with me while I was in the Come come. How do you do? How do you do? There was this woman on that was incredible from a 2013 episode and she was like, well, no, because this woman used to be a lady and she, yeah, like not in the way that, you know, some people used to be ladies, but like she used to be a lady because she was married to someone in the aristocracy. Well, I'm sorry. lady because she was married to someone in the aristocracy.

Well, I'm sorry. I don't know if you know about these things, but she was incredible. And when she read the menus of the dinings that she was going to, she had a magnifying glass and she would like, Oh, this is just absolutely divine. Oh my God. Isn't this fabulous? And then when she had her daughter there helping her, she was like, now today I've enlisted the help of my daughter. She's quite incredible.

And then when she said goodbye to her, she said, okay, to lip hip, I'll see you in the fullness of time. That is great. Did you, I feel like I must've sent them to you and Benign or whatever, but these like two like London Twinks. Oh, yes. Who like go shopping. Yes. It must be parody.

It has to. Because it's so intense. But they, you know, like today Reginald's wearing his Hermes scarf and they'll like go and you know, buying a $600 like ice cream pop from the store Yes, and they sit down and they have a little like the tiniest mouse bite and just oh, this is just a van Just a van and exceptionally rich. That's actually what's their name the makeup artist? Who's like McLean? Oh Um, oh

Like from yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It, like from, yeah, yeah, yeah. He was like, as you can see, I have alabaster skin. And it is quite unusual for me to find a brand that ranges as pale as my skin. In this film. In this film, I shall be explaining to you how I will be wearing my makeup today. I like that. And that's kind of the energy that I was bringing to the UK. Hello. You have spotted me. I am Lazy Susan.

And I'm Zelda Moon. And welcome. And this is death to everyone. It's quite divine. It is divine. And today we are being driven in our space car. Of course, the automobile that Papa had fixed up from the shop. Toot-toot.

And this is Matt Shears. All aboard. In his Newsy's hat and vest. We did not ask him to wear it, however he does choose to. I like to wear it. Oh. I like to wear it. Oh, I like to wear it. Okay. So I guess, I guess what I was trying to say is that I just went to drag con UK.

Oh yeah. And how was that? Yes, it was amazing. Yeah. Two days. Two days of spectacular wonder here at the XL center. Two days of travel, two days of drag, two days of travel. Yeah, bitch.

Yeah. Um, yeah, you little cunt. Sorry. He's being surrounded by drag queens all the way. Getting back into the Ossiana. Yeah. Um, so I flew. Yeah.

We flew. We fly. We fly. I flew with Qatar through Doha. Um, Nobra. And then I arrived and like, so I had some, I had some Zanis on the plane. Took me nice down. I was like, why can't I watch this film?

I can't even pay attention to anything. And it was because I was, and I was like immediately, I was like, why can't I watch this film? I can't even pay attention to anything. And it was because I was and I was like immediately I was like, how does Annex? And then I was like, can I get a vodka? And let me tell you that this woman from Qatar Airways was like playing fast and loose with my life. She was like, oh, that's a double. And so then I was like, like, I was seeing things, the screen was not on. I was watching movies that haven't ever come out yet. And like dozing off like in very like, un unbeautyous positions. And then got off at at the airport, not the main one, not Heathrow, but the other one, Gatwick, and then got recognized, clocked immediately upon arrival by a Drag Race fan who was there to support

the Queens of the Philippines, JD, and that was very kind and sweet. And they were like, are you lazy, Susan? I kept looking at you and I realized that you were. And I'm like, well, yeah, I was like, I need to stop going out in public. Cause I just, I look awful most of the time, particularly after getting off a Xanny flight.

Yeah. And yeah. So that was like, I was like, oh, and then got no press. Yeah. No, please not like this. And then we, yeah, we went and like, God, what a time. Dragcon is a hoot and a half. Dragcon UK wild. Did how, how did the politics work with being at the ribbon cutting? Okay, very important question. Yeah. It is like Hunger Games.

question. It is like Hunger Games. The girls that go, go at the front. I was, yeah. And so I was like, I was a rogue. Cause you know how Art Simone is always at the front? Yes. I think that's just because she has the tenacity of spirit to get there. Oh my Lord. She will kill and she's like, if it doesn't work to get to the front, you can lie down at the front. Oh. And so like, she's just like on it doesn't work to get to the front, you can lie down at the front. Oh, and so like, she's just like on it because she is there to do a job. Yeah. Yeah. She is there to be in photos to make sure that everyone knows that she was there because she's like, I didn't spend thousands of dollars to fly here to be in

the background of a fucking photograph. I want to stand next to RuPaul. Like she wants that shining moment where it slowly zooms in and Jack Nicholson's in every one. Yes, correct. But I was there and I was in the back. I had woken up at four in the morning, put on makeup to be in the back of a photo, but I got to see RuPaul. That's fun. Which was fun.

And she was flanked by security and her two evil witches, Michelle Visage and Raven. And they were both on either side of her and it was incredible to watch them all like, like the security like cleared the way, made a space for RuPaul to step through. It was incredible. And there was something fun about being in the back with all the divas. Yeah. But yeah, it was good time. And then we did the Queens walk and then it was such a chic moment where we were all standing around and then like a PA came and found me and was like, lazy, what are you doing here?

And I'm like, what? And she's like, you need to come with the winners. And I was like, me? Me? She's like winners work walk first. And I was like, goodbye losers. I'm going at the front. Winners walk first. Winners walk first. That's right. And I was with Ginger, Ginger Johnson. Oh.

And she was a real pip. She was such good value. Because there seemed to be a few different energies happening. There were gals that liked to gab and treat you like you're just like, we're just here to have fun, this is silly. That's the ginger. There's the girls who are like, I wanna get photos with this person, this person, this person, this person, and I have my handler, and

they're gonna set us up for the photo. We're gonna say hey, and then we're gonna walk away. Like there's not, we're not just chilling out. We're here to do the job. And then there's the divas that are like focused on whatever the fuck they're wearing. Like whatever they're wearing is so elaborate that it's actually going to like ruin their life. Yeah. And they're just in maintenance mode. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I hate being in that mode. Yes. Take you out of everything else. Yes. Yeah. So they're like, I mean,

like Lawrence was back there and she was very like chatty Cathy, like good vibes immediately. Exactly what you kind of hope. Chene. Miss Lawrence Chene. And then do you know the other diva who on the set up day when I went to go and get my passes yelled out and ran across and was like, hello.

Obviously I don't because I wasn't there. Cause I told you who. It was Sasha Balloa. Oh yeah. Did I not tell you? No, you didn't tell me. Obviously I don't. Well, you do. Because I told you who. It was Sasha Bluer. Oh, yeah. Did I not tell you? No, you didn't tell me that. I didn't tell you? No.

She's like, lazy. And then I was like, hello. And then I was like, what's happening? And she was like, I just loved you on the show. It's nice to meet you. And I was like, ah. And then I was like, and you just flew in from New York. And she was like, no, I was just in Italy.

And I was like, oh, shut up. I was just in Italy. And then we had a chat about And she was like, no, it's just in Italy. And I was like, oh, shut up. I was just in Italy. And then we had a chat about Italy. She said, don't tell me to shut up. She said, don't say that to me. Don't joke about that. And then, but do you know what I said to her that I only realized maybe a day ago was a faux pas.

Oh no. She said, I can't help myself. I know. I was like, we are all here at DragCon UK. And she's like, I know, right? And I'm like, have you even done one of these in ages? And she's like, no, I'm like, but I guess we just got to shove up our tinsel curtains and pray.

And like, I kind of like gave it like tinsel curtain, like a little bit of like a, could you imagine? And then I saw the photos of her booth later on, realized that she had a tinsel curtain. Sorry, Sasha. That's good. Yeah. And then of course, the other thing that kept happening was I... Well, number one, I hadn't watched any Drag Race since I did Drag Race.

Yes, which I think is a very good thing for your mental health. I need to say it's not because I don't like Drag Race, it's because I was just like every conversation, every single thing I was doing at that time up until now has been about Drag Race. And this conversation isn't about Drag Race either. Well, exactly what I fucking mean. It's that thing in Mean Girls where she's like, I couldn't shut up, I couldn't shut up.

Like I would just open my mouth and suddenly I was talking about Regina George. And like, I know that all I talk about now is this show that I was in. And I used to have a personality. I don't anymore. But the...so because of that, I was like, I just can't watch anymore of this show. But also because of that, there were divas that were coming up to me and being like, oh my God, loved you on the show, great work, Lazy Susan.

And I was like, and you, you too, girl, you're the best. No, you. Of your season or when you get on your season. Yeah. You'll do great. You're amazing. And they're like, I just work in the bathroom and you're like, well, you keep doing that diva. It was terrible.

And even with seasons that I had watched, I still managed to step in it like with, oh God, I've forgotten her name again. I was like, oh, you're doing a kitchen themed booth. Oh, why are you doing a kitchen themed booth? And she was like, what do you mean? And I was like, well, what's that daimontied rice cooker there? And she was like, well, and then someone turned and was like,

did you not watch the talent show on global all-stars? She had the rice cooker and she was fighting the dragon. Do you remember that? No. You remember she was like, her talent was cooking rice. But then in the meantime, a dragon came out and she slayed the dragon. Oh, global all stars. I think so.

She was like a Philippines girl. Yeah. Anyway, maybe it was versus the world. I mean, I've watched all of them, but I don't remember. I had seen it, was was versus the world. I mean I've watched all of them, but I remember I had seen it was looking at the prop Yeah, even now. I'm like, what was that? And I stood in it so substantially in front of her that I was like I need to leave. Yeah. Goodbye Yeah, maybe next time no

No, like we go into any social interaction. Not just at a con. Yeah. We should take smug bombs. Oh yes. And we could color code them. Like I can get pink ones, you can get yellow ones. That'd be fun. That'd be fun. I think that like once I get someone's name in my head, I can't stop saying it. That's one issue. Where like, you know, like Lily from Adelaide. I love Lily. Obviously we're all obsessed with Lily who manages the backstage at Adelaide and like Icon, but once that name entered my head, I'm like, I'll never forget Lily. Yeah. And every time I see her I'll be like Lily! But like, if you do not fall into that category where I'm remembering your name,

then it will never go in. Yeah. And it's so bad. And in this industry where they're like, detox even remembered the, like, security guards name at like circuit when she went back 10 years later. Yeah. I, what? An obscure name I love, but yeah, regular names are not so fun.

Like I loved on New Year's remembering everyone's names. Yes. That was great. And like JD, the guy from the airport, remember his name, but that's only because I went, oh, like Scrubs. You need like a Michael Scott from the office remembering tool. See, I know I just brought up Scrubs, but I don't know what you're doing. Oh, he has like an offensive way of remembering everyone's names.

Oh, this will be me. Yeah, you've got to like come up with a system. Oh, hello shorty. But I also had a friend once who said that when he learnt someone's name, someone else's name got yeah, removed from his mind. But he didn't know whose it was. Only when he saw them later, he'd be like, I've forgotten that person's name because they're off the list. Now Lily is taking the place.

It's Lily removes all names. Only Lily remains. Well, God willing. I would love that. Yeah. Oh, but yes, I would love all of our favorite Adelaide divas to be Melbourne divas. I know. Well, I'm going to be performing in Adelaide.

I got booked. Oh. Yeah. Oh, because you're going over for... Fringe for a weekend for the Wash Up with Wes. Wash Up, Wash Up, Wash Up. Yeah. Yes.

Which if I'm doing literally three shows in Adelaide, book now or forever hold your peace. They're afternoon shows, honey, which makes them so chic because you can come and get like your wine on and then go and see three other shows in the evening. Like it's just a saucy little late night show in the afternoon.

That's hard. The wash up with Wes, smelling. And speaking of coming to gigs, this will come out tomorrow, Tuesday. So come on Thursday to ACME to Wicked. Wicked. Sing along. She's dead.

Good news. I can't wait to belt into our little Madonna mics. Oh, they're getting, they made a mistake. Horrificly indirect lyrics. She's dead. Madonna Max. Oh, they're getting, they made a mistake. Indirect lyrics. She's dead. Yeah, I love Wicked. Yeah. So yeah, Lazy and I are hosting a Wicked sing-along at ACME this Thursday. So if you're

free and you're listening to this on Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday, come along. And at what point in the three hour runtime do you think the people at ACME will realize they've made a terrible decision in inviting us to be there? They'll realize that before they start the show. Because when they see what we're wearing. Yeah. There's been a few times where they're like, so when like, how do you want to queue for the performances and things like that? Sorry, we're going to be sitting down watching a movie. I don't know what you're doing. It's movie time. We... It's actually really rude to do that during a movie. Yeah.

I wouldn't do that. No, it's going to be sick. The wickedest witch there ever was, enemy of all of us here in Oz is dead. I'm going to do that. Burn the witch. Yeah. Anyway. Yeah. But so you're doing Mary's as well. Mary's. Yes.

But you know what? The thing about it is Zelda moon. Yeah. I need to fucking make some new spot numbers. I need three new spots. Yeah. I think I just need to like, I'm just so bored of myself. I'm screaming. And the worst part is... I'm screaming. I'm screaming.

Who? Pull that mask off. Who's sitting in that chair? You know what guys? I'm screaming. I am so sick of myself. You come back from the UK. I got to do some new spot because you guys? I'm screaming. I am so sick of myself. You come back from the UK. I got to do some new spot. Cause you guys, I'm screaming. What? I don't mean like I'm screaming, put it on a mug at typo. I mean like I'm screaming until blood is gurgling at the back of my throat. How dare you not understand the nuance.

But, um, I have become a worst person. You're saying weird shit like I'm screaming. I'm absolutely fucking screaming. I'm dead. Mother Gaga. Oh, that's really funny. See, this isn't helping. You're cutting into time that I could be using to make a new spot number. Okay. But like, what am I going to do?

Dirty? But then I'm like covered in mud? The JLo mud. Yeah. From the Rose Garden at the heart factory. Yes. Um, yeah. You know what I mean?

I do. I'm just, I... I think I've grown more self-conscious about number. Like I overthink it. Yes. We used to like put a number together and be like, oh yeah, that can reference that and smash these two things together. That's fun. But now I'm like, oh, is that entertaining? Is that funny? Is that a good thing to? Also, I'm just like, there's nothing new under the sun, honey. I can't. Do you know what I really want to get into is spoken word like lip-syncs. Another one?

Spoken word power-chains. Yeah, like as in like lip-syncing words. Yeah. Yeah, that's hard. Like a monologue. Do a monologue. Well, I would love that. I would love if it was like a full monologue and then I just cut in. But I had a new one that I wanted to try out. When you do them and do them well, it's amazing.

They're so good and I love those old Cartier ones. Those old Cartier ones. Where is it? Did I like it or not? Now I need you to imagine if you're listening from home, this gay guy is wearing like full fur white linens and partial sunglasses that are just like vaguely tinted and this is what he said. a sensible salad, taking a nap, having a shot of whiskey, dinner, maybe a special chocolate, and off to bed. Happy Wednesday. If I could learn that, do you think that would people would like that? That's a great spot number. I see we got two to go. A sensible salad and then off to bed. Happy Wednesday.

Yeah, that's good. Like that's fun. I like that. Okay. I don't know. I'm just bloody sick of it. No, I'm bloody sick of it, Margaret. How did your...

Okay, so for those who don't know. What do you want to know? At the con, they are now doing like franchise booths and you get a couple hours to peddle your wares. It's called the pig pen. Sure. That's what I call it. I was like you can catch me over at the pig pen later on and then the next day I heard someone be like oh you going to pig pen? And I was like good everyone knows pig pen. Pig pen. So it is it does look like Royal Melbourne show pig pen and they have 24 pig pens like facing each

other with generic World of Wonder backdrops in different colors. The nastiest shade of purple and the foulest shade of green. What color did Dan under get? No but it's generic. Oh right okay. They're like are you from where? Okay you go to Pigpen number 19 and Yeah, and wade through the slop. Yeah and get there Yeah, but bitch I'm screaming I'm furious. No, I I made some big mistakes huge huge yeah, I

So they the way the pig pen works. Yeah, if you're gonna be in Queen of the universe Queen's universe like pig pen you get a print that they so kindly print for you Yes And then they'll sell that and the way that that works is that they add the tax they you're basically like mmm, and then they take a fee and They, you're basically like, and then they take a fee. And then on that fee, they use that fee to pay the workers that are selling your wares and the person who's taking the photos for you, okay?

So you don't have to supply anything. You rock up, it's plug and play. It's, according to the divas who've done a lot of stuff, like Miss Simone, she's like, this is the best it's ever been. You can just show up in this country. You do two hours on one day, two hours on the next. You're done, she's like, this is the best it's ever been. You can just show up in this country, you do two hours on one day, two hours on the next, you're done, you've sold,

and you can put your stuff at the front desk and people can buy it there separate if they want to. Okay. But the way that it's like, obviously it's like, I love the booth. I love the fantasy of the booth. We've done many booths together. Well, we've done two booths together.

But like, I like that you get to extend the brand into a physical location and people can come and explore it with you. That's fun and cute. For those of you who don't know me, in Zelda did this city booth where we were giant. Like Kaiju creatures. I was a giant turtle and she was a giant lobster.

And we were crushing a city. And the way that you got a photo with us is that we set it up so it looked like you, it was from a very low angle in slow motion and we emailed it to you as if it was fun. Yeah. Actually, so chic. It was so good.

But that magic was missing and then they're like, you can only have one piece of merchandise that you can sell. And so I don't know how I got this in my head, but in my mind, they had said that the prints were $30, 30 pound. So yeah, $60. Okay. That's a lot, which is not true. They never said that I went back and checked the emails and they never said that.

So you said I had invented that in my head. You were charging people $60 for a photo. No, bitch. So like they were charging £16. £16, yeah. When I got there for my print. The wrong print. I had sent them another print,

where I had specially designed, and they emailed them three times about how I wanted it to be this print, which was like my promo print and then me ripping through it. Oh yeah. As the monster. And they just used the one that I'd sent them as the like Instagram profile thing.

And I was like, this is so disappointing because I made it special and confirmed by email three times. But I was lucky to be there because they obviously didn't let some people in as you heard from the Espana girls. Did you see that on Twitter? No. Okay. Well, the Divas went through the exact same thing that I went through where I applied

very late to come to the thing and had been like assuming that they'd be able to just like let me in and be excited that like I was going to be there. We'll winners walk first. Pre-win, pre-win. But I was like, can I come? And they're like, actually, no know we're fully booked have a nice life You can have tickets to take walk around as a civilian and I was like I did not spend Three and a half thousand dollars to walk around as a civilian for two days. Yeah

That's a nice idea, but I'm not that kind of rich And so then I think because Beverly Kills had pulled out, there was a slot available, but they gave me one meet and greet slot instead of the two, and that was it. And then there was a lot of last minute communication. So I'm very thankful that they let me in. That was great, exciting, fun,

but then the print was wrong and I was sad about that. And then because I had gotten in my head that it was 30 pound pound I was like that's crazy but like I don't want to like cut my own lunch by doing like a $35 print you want $60 well because I had the lookbook so I was bringing the lookbooks old moneymaker Susan so then I was like $60 for a photo bitch wait I was like I'll do the look book and I'll do them for 35 pound thinking, thinking that like, if you want just the one image, you'll pay 30 pound. And then for 11 images or 12 images with the stickers and all the bits, I'll do it for 35. And then I'll throw a mystery badge in with that as well.

Oh, generous queen. Well, I was like, so that's $70. But then I was like, well, when you factor in the fact that I've flown it over and that I'm paying to be there and blah, blah, blah, but I'm like, I can't escape the guilt. I think anyone that goes on the website of MsLazySusan.com will know that like, the prices are reasonable.

The postage isn't, but that's not to do with me. That's just postage. But the prices are good, like relative. But this was the most I've ever charged for anything and I felt crazy and bad about doing it because I was like And then when I got there They're like, oh, yeah, the prints are just 16 pound and I was like That's crazy I look crazy And then they're like and we've added VAT, the tax on top.

It's 42 pound. Oh, $84. Wait, what is this tax? This is just the general service tax that they add on top of purchases in. So from $16 to $42. No, that's the lazy look book from 35 to 42. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. I'm like, I'm gonna sell one of them.

What am I thinking? Yeah, yeah. And it's already expensive to get in. And Sasha Veloo is selling her book for 25. I seem crazy. Before or after this tax. I think that they're doing it themselves because that's just inclusive of everything.

Okay. I feel crazy. That's so much money. You were screaming. Yeah. Anyway, well, let me tell me that I'm screaming. So then day two comes, I get my slot in the pig pen, one door three. And it's a good slot.

It's a great slot. Yeah. Last slot. Do you have to lie down in the slop? Like, well, it depends what the person getting the photo wants. They can have me in the slop. He's lying there in a pile of hay.

Look, she's shy today. So people start. So when I get there, I mean, okay, this is the part where I went, I sound crazy, but you know, I've just got to say it, listener, you know me. When I got there, because I think by virtue of the fact that I hadn't been on the day before, there was a line and there wasn't just a line. They had to cut off the line because it had gotten so long. They know that the people at the end won't get there by three.

Yeah. I love that. Bitch. And then this is where kind of things start to fall apart. The Divas were amazing. All the PAs at DragCon UK, incredible. Salespeople, they are not. Oh, this bitch with the square was walking around being like,

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah me like 16 pounds, 44 pounds. Oh no. And she wasn't explaining what the two things were. So there were people at the front and when people did buy the look books and if you bought them, thank you so much. You paid for my trip. Other people would see and be like, oh that's really cool. Relative, like that's quite an offering and like, why not? So like, it explodes you, but like you get the pin and the thing, blah, blah, blah.

And so like people were like actually buying them if they knew what they were. But these like Gallywells were just like, blah, blah, blah, blah. And so no one like, yeah. So we did sell quite a few of the look books, but it was like very, like I felt crazy because then sometimes people got it and were like, what? But then the line just stayed thick the entire time, which I love and was so fun and everyone was really lovely to me.

And so yeah, very nice. That's good. Yeah, but I didn't know what to write on people's like things that they were getting signed Because I'd never done that before. So I'd be like, what was your name? And they'd be like, Braden. And I'd be like, dear Braden, I hope you live forever. Hail Satan.

Love lazy Susan. And what was your friend's name? Tom. Oh, OK. Dear Tom, please die soon. Love, Lacey. P.S. Hail Satan. And then one was like, hi, I? Full stop. Airplane. That seems good.

And then full stop. To you? Yeah. Lazy. That's perfect. It's very how we approach signing the Death to Everyone merch. It was so, and they like, sometimes you could tell that they were like, what?

Because I didn't realize you could just write, to blank, love blank. Blank. You could. I love that. Dear blank. What was your name? Michelle.

I'm just the red blank. Well, that's... So like other people were like, yeah, other people were just doing that and I was like, I've made a huge mistake because I've been like customizing them all being like, uh, what a year we've had. But the line, the line was so long. It wasn't moving at all.

They did after the first one, they're like, you can't do them that long. You have to like speed this shit up. Yeah. And I was like, okay, thank you. So that was my experience in pigpen. Queen's walk was fun. Very long room. No one's going to tell you this, but that room is too long. Too big. Too big. You couldn't walk that far. No, I was actually sweating. You? Yeah. I know. I need to get on top of that.

No! I need to get on top of that. And there were some, I can't say who, but there were some divas at the con. And that was very funny because I asked some of the PAs who were working around, like, I was like, so who is the biggest cunt at DragCon? And they were like, no one, you're all amazing. And I was like, but who actually? And they're like, well, let me tell you that on day one, this bitch was acting up after she got off the Queen's walk. And she really like expected a lot. I love that kind of stuff. It was real good.

Not all Queens are created equal. No. Some of them are cunts. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I like that. Yeah. Okay. Anyway. So we do this episode. Yeah let's fucking get to it. Uh would you like to destroy the planet? I shall. Go on. Wait have I just done it? I don't know. Um so the the apocalypse that we're heading into is I'm going to go for like a Trump presidency.

Oh, yeah. And I think Trump takes over, but then he starts running the apprentice, but like everyone in the world, because he's become such a terrifying dictator, Yes. that he's able to run the entire world. Have you, sorry, have you seen the TikTok like screenshots? Yes. It's fucking. It's for those of you listening, Zelda, why don't you tell them what it says?

No, cause I'll say it wrong and you'll probably remember. Well, no. So like when TikTok was banned, they were like, TikTok is like the TikTok ban is going into effect as of tonight. We hope that like future president Donald Trump will be able to help us get it back online. Yeah. And you were like, what? What? The man who proposed the ban in the first place? Okay. It's like we're working with like, yeah, to like fix this. Then like Trump's inauguration takes place and then TikTok's back online and And then TikTok says, thank you to Donald.

Thanks to the tireless work of Donald Trump. TikTok is now back online for all of you Americans in the most blatant display of actual factual propaganda, but lazy. Yeah. There's like no masking it. No. Like it looks like what the first screenshot I saw, I was like, that's funny. Yeah, there's like no masking it. No, it looks like what the first screenshot I saw. I was like, that's funny. Yeah. Like it's a parody. I joke. Obviously. Yeah. Like what? Yeah. The fuck. That is some like old school, like, like China propaganda. Yeah. Like it, what are we doing here? Yeah.

Anyway. So basically, Trump forces everyone to compete in like a giant, like, worldwide, like Hunger Games-esque, like, apprentice, and then forces everyone to like, whoever can raise the most money from the lemonade stand Set up in Times Square wins And they're like, I mean the crowd crush alone takes out a majority of the population because he does fly them all out to America Yeah, everyone. Yeah Everyone people die and just like the crowd crush. Yeah, and then he starts the survivors left over takes them into the boardroom Well, I hope some of those lemons got crushed Who's gonna buy the lemonade the survivors left over takes them into the boardroom. Well, I hope some of those lemons got crushed as well. Who's going to buy the lemonade? I'd love a sip.

Well, if we're all going to die anyway, there's blood in mine. I'd love to go down with some lemonade. I mean, I do like Americana style lemonade. No fears, but just delicious juice. Americana style lemonade. No fears, but just delicious juice. Did she make the tagline? No fears, just delicious juice. Sugar. Okay.

And Omarosa's there. She's yelling about something. Yeah. And then everyone just dies until one final person becomes Donald's new apprentice in the apocalyptic wasteland. Most of, um, like New York City, if it had the world's population packed into it would probably be like, uh, like 12 people deep. Yeah. I was going to say all of like, you'd be able to access, you know, like level 18. Yeah. Just like opening the door. Yeah, that's right.

And selling lemonade out of that window. Yes. Yeah. So I think that's probably how it is. And he would be like, I really didn't think about this. Like Trump would be like, oh, there are a lot of people in the world. Like, you know, sometimes at night I'd be like, I wonder if you put every daddy long legs in this room

in the world in this room. What would it be like? It would be a brick of solid, dense daddy long legs. Yeah. There are, I know I've said this many times before, but there are just so many daddy long legs in my bedroom. It's crazy. Daddy long legs. Are you like saying that like braggadociously? Kinda. Are you like braiding them?

No. Braiding them? Other things get braided. What? To sell. Zelda, are you talking about your hole? No. Did you say other things are getting braided in that room and you said my hole?

I'm having a moment of like vacuuming up cobwebs at the moment in my house. And it seems unusual for you. Do you do that in or out of the tattered wedding dress? Wash paper my cobwebs. But I was doing it this week and Don't be silly And and Don't be silly. Vote for Tilly. And god damn, there's so many cobwebs in my bedroom. That's all. In your ass.

No. But anyway, not anymore. I vacuumed them up. Can I tell you a freakish story before we dive into this week's episode? Well, it couldn't get freaky than that. You can try it. Spooky cob webs. My dad and his new girlfriend, Christine Basil. She's a public figure.

She's a comedian. Her finest joke, dating my father. No, they were a very cute couple and very funny people together. But he sent me this message, he'd be like, so me and Christine Basil have gotten into her recent activity of going through the hard rubbish, because she goes through hard rubbish and sometimes on sells it. And it's particularly always looking for like deco pieces

or whatever. I don't know what hard rubbish she's going to, but probably black. Anyway, and he's like, so we picked, and this while I'm in the UK, I'm like, like I'm standing at Edinburgh Castle. I need you to like envision that and getting this message from my father. And he's like, so we found this and I think like you've got to, like, you've got to have this. Like, do you want it? Yeah.

I'll give you both one guess. Okay. What it is. So they found something in hard rubbish. Yes. And then across- In a large box. In a box.

Yes. But is it in its own box or in like a box of knickknackery? I don't know. I've only seen one haunting image of this box, and I need to explain. Okay, and it's an object that you have to have. They saw it, and they were like, -"They thought of you." -"We need to get that for Robbie."

Okay. I'm... My gut instinct is like... Like haunted statue, maybe for a garden ornament, but probably inside. And I don't know what the creature is. It could be like a sad dog or a sad child. Sad child. Okay. And that, what is your guess?

Um, yeah, maybe some sort of toy, like a big plush bear or something. Okay. I'm going to put the first haunted photo in the group chat and you describe what you're seeing. Okay. Okay. So there's a, um, there's a large box and all we can see emerging from the box is what is maybe a mannequin, but I can see an incredible rack.

Some knockers. Some really big knockers poking out of the top of the box. Two twisted hands emerging. It's a, it's a coffin size box. Let's... Oh, okay. So Mithregan has come from this box. A mannequin's head that looks like a very expensive sex doll. It is, in fact, a very expensive sex doll.

Yeah. That has been thrown out. Look at these eyes of ecstasy. They are rolling back in her head. That has been thrown out by its user and picked up by two, a couple in their 60s. Isn't that relatable content? My dad, a used sex object that's only now being, and my dad's like, you just have to have this. And I'm like, the head is like detached as well.

Well, it's detachable. Oh, okay. I assume so you can drain the cum. From its neck? Yes. Yes. Anyway, so I said, he said you probably, you do need to disinfect it, but you can, I think so many things that you could, I'm assuming she's sloshing with cum when they

find this. You're not throwing out a living doll. You're not going to clean it before you throw it out. If you're throwing it out, you're like... Give it one last pump. She's used up now. Well, she's full. And so...

Off to market. The thing I know from my friend who used to work at Sexyland is that they're incredibly hard to dispose of these living dolls because they're like $3,000. And they're like $3,000 and they're just pure silicon with like an armature on the inside. Well, if these fiends would just sell a couple look books, they could pay for it in no time. I could get her to stand in for me. Put it on marketplace and see what you get.

Well, no, she's fabulous. Keep her forever. Well, the thing that OK, so two things. No one. I was like, I'm so sorry, Dad. We've just got a skip for our house. I can't bring a five foot tall woman into the house and just like, like, Virgin will kill me.

We've just spent all the time to which my dad says, Oh, I'll keep it in the shed for you. When my dad, and the number two thing is everything about this story sounds like, what a crazy thing to do. But if he did not pick the exact right person, I would love that doll. I think that doll is fantastic. I would use her for so many things. It's not weird at all.

He correctly anticipated the things that I like. Diva, you're getting that doll. That doll is going to be in my house. It is. But what to do with her? Oh, well, you could start off by dressing her. I Didn't want you to dress her like a slut. I want you to just dress her like she's a fabulous five-foot lady Well, that's it. She's a bit short. Yeah, I mean if you're gonna do life-size, right?

Like just make her 5'10", right? Maybe like 5'8". She can be 5'2", and then I can pretend she's Lady Gaga. You know? Yeah. Wait, how many famous 5' women are there? Oh, great question. Okay, you look up that. Well, after I'm done with this gal, one. And have you thought about names?

I don't think me and Kurjan are ready. Okay, okay, okay, okay. I don't want to... Don't rush it. don't rush it. Don't it's going to, can we give you a little bit more context on the picture? Cause it's, it's telling a big story. Go on.

So the box is over in the corner of the room. There's one arm poking out. The knockers are poking out. The knockers are. One other hand is like just visible. And then behind the box is a plush Eeyore doll From Winnie the Pooh. Yeah, I assume she was that was a very She in the same box. Yeah, also filled with gum

The door is wide open to the house And but you know, I'm assuming it's your father's shoes Your father's legs are just crossed in the front of the photo. You can see that he's sitting back with crossed legs. He's like sitting in his armchair. I'm going to send a photo of this to my son. Rocking on the chair. Just relaxing after a hard day of scavenging.

Yeah. And also in the cupboard, the TV cabinet, there is a haunting assortment. On the bottom drawer bottom shelf I see some sort of automaton that looks fabulous then on shelf two we have a poodle doll yes which I don't know how to feel about that then top that looks like a portable record player would be my guess. Yeah. There's a hideous vase.

I mean, a beautiful vase above it. You leave Christine Basil's hideous vase. So this is Christine's house. Yeah. It's my dad's house would not be photographed like this. I was going to say, is this that house or this house is tidy. So this is Christine Basil's house because look at this keyboard. That looks like a flat, like I'm stepping on it, a time zone kind of keyboard. How's that keyboard so flat?

Well, she collects random detritus. She is truly... Can I say the tribute to Christine Basil? Just a moment. And she's got this book that says all the songs. Well, where else are you going to find all the songs? Yeah. Quickly, Dolly Parton going to find all the songs? Yeah. Um, quickly Dolly Parton and Arianna Grande with five foot.

So we're good. I'm going to bring the sex doll to the wicked screening. Just so that we won't dress it. She's like, did you know this is the same height as Arianna Grande? Say that to everyone. Or we could seat her in the front row and then pick her up and throw her at one point. She's dead! The wickedest witch there ever was. Light her on fire. Watch the cum boil.

And the acme people will be like, why? You're never working with drag queens again. Just got the smell of burnt cum out of this room. of her working with drag queens. Just got the smell of burnt cum out of this room. Anyway, tribute to Christine Basel. She met Curtin, my boyfriend, the other night. And we're all sitting at the only Mexican place in Belgrave, which is simultaneously the best and worst

Mexican place in Belgrave. And Curtin's talking about his time at Steiner School in Castlemain. And he's talking about the winter solstice event that takes place on the, what is it, the... The 21st of June. The longest day of the, the shortest day of the year. And on this night they make a giant coil. Uh, Matt, you tell me they make a giant spiral in the middle of the room and everyone starts humming and chanting.

Yeah. And then they, the each student one by one takes a candle into the spiral. And lights their candle. And the candle shoved into an apple and they're set up. And then they make a big spiral and it takes hours? Yeah, sometimes it does. Yeah. And so Curtin's telling this whole story and he's like, and that's the shortest night, shortest day of the year.

And Christine Basil quietly from the other side of the room goes, sounds like the longest night of the fucking year. She's great. That's amazing. That's great. Sounds like the longest day of the fucking year. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Amazing love Basil. That is Gold. Yeah. Okay. That's why she's a comedian Anyway, okay. So like in a zombie movie where they're all climbing on top of each other. Oh, yeah, the get up a wall New york city is filled with the corpses of all. Yeah. Yeah That's very poetic sound off

Thank you with that Hello hello governor and welcome back. What's wrong with you? To Death to Everyone. And our first topic for discussion today. So we had a couple of topics coming in via email. Would you always welcome to send through topics, please? Do it. And where can they send those emails? deathtoeveryonepod.gmail.com.

Sorry, I wasn't asking you. Not every full stop is an opening for you to just throw yourself in. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.com. Sorry. I wasn't asking you. Not every full stop is an opening for you to just throw yourself in. Oh my God. I'm screaming.

So I'm crying. Screaming the way you said it then that's working. Maybe everyone's onto something. Um, screaming. I'm screaming. Okay, but Ben Buggy sent these in. Have you connected with this Ben Buggy on Instagram? Because they're really hot. Wait, Ben Buggy?

Yeah. Let me see. Let me see you, Ben Buggy. Come out of the woodwork, you know. Wait, and this is a fan of the park? Yes. Ben Buggy is a fan of... Ben Buggy. Wait, Ben Buggy. a fan of wait Ben buggy Ben buggy

Anyway, you're following Ben buggy. Yeah Wait and Ben buggy has a mix cloud sure, oh My god Anyway, just say that they're hot. They are hot. Okay, and a salt and pepper mustache and goatee Yeah, very cute Ben buggy. Ben Buggy. Did you follow them from the Death to Everyone account? I know because we only follow things that are in the bunker.

Well Ben Buggy, we need, I need to see Ben Buggy. Oh, you don't, you don't see? No. Oh, I see. They have a private account and I'm sure they're loving this attention right now. Oh yeah. Sorry Ben Buggy. Ben Buggy.

I'm going to send, you know what, I'll send it to the, to the chat. Yeah. Anyway, the first topic for discussion today, as suggested by Ben Berge is STIs and which one indeed shall go into the bunker. Yeah. So sister. Where's all my soul, sister? Crabs.

Crabs. I am Miss Baltimore. Crabs. Crabs. Okay. Let's just reel them off. And I need to like kind of refine, because like some of them I know intimately.

And some of them I don't know what like the specific side effects are bits and bobs. So let's go through. So we have hepatitis A, B and C. We have monkey punks. Nude of the game. Incumbent STI. but also not really technically,

like it is sexually transmitted, but it also is just transmitted. A new challenger approaches. And it's got a good name. Monkeypox. Monkeypox. That's pretty good. That's fun. Then we have Gonorrhea. Yes. Gonorrhea, you're gonna see her. Yeah. Sure. Ch, what's the, the poo one? Poo?

The, the one that you get from like eating air. Yeah. The poo one? Pink eye? No, it's got like some evil name and it's really hard to get rid of. Yes, but it's got like a shortened version. Yeah. Anyway, that one, hate that one.

So Ben Buggy is not giving like, like he is just like incidentally hot, but his Instagram is not about him being hot. Which is why it's so hot. It's very hot because he's just like, I am like sitting in front of a stack of pancakes. And I like really curated screenshots that, you know, cause the other ones aren't of him

because he's a normal person with a life. Yeah. Sorry to invade you. And me just reading a book. Look at that one. Why are you listening to this Ben buggy? I like this one, making bulk chai concentrate. Like Matt, this looks like- We're really invading-

Invading this person's privacy. Who has a private account? I know. Well, we're not bleeping any of this. No. You made a huge mistake. Ben loves it. Ben Buggy-

You think Buggy is his real last name? I hope so. That would be so cool. His family invented it. The Buggy. The Buggy. Yeah. Matt, this man should be your friend.

Why? Don't you think this man gives Matt Shears friend energy? Yeah, he looks nice. I make bulk tea as well. That's why I was liking it. Yeah. You guys would definitely hang out over weekend. Just like Lazy Susan.

No one pursue this person. Leave them alone. I'm not. You know, wait, like American Lazy Susan. Oh, exactly. Yes. Yeah, leave her alone Jennifer my god Have we yeah, we said that I've got her much the other day. I'm so happy really Yeah, so for those of you who don't know we have crowned our favorite lazy Susan globally

Yeah, and it is the lazy Susan that has the handle at lazy Susan on Instagram, who I've been long enamored with from afar and have followed. But then when I got on the show, I was like, wow. And like we've wished each other happy birthday and things like that. Cause she has a perfect life. She's amazing. Um, and I sent her some merchandise and she loved it. And she was like, you did great on the show. She's so cute. I love her. She is. She operates on an astral plane that we could not access. She's yeah. She's yeah. Yeah. Top of the Chrysler building selling lemonade and unbothered. Yeah.

She kicks Trump off. But she, anyway. Oh, that was stupid. Um, what else are we talking about? Yeah. Ben buggy. Oh no. Wait, did Ben buggy give context? Does he need like an agony? I don't know.

Urinary tract infection. That can be an, maybe. I don't know. Um, and then crabs. We'll say scabies, because that's like you can get that contact from. In Tennessee. The All Stars. Yeah. Um, what is the clap?

Oh, Syphilis. What's the clap? The clap is gonorrhea. I thought that was comedia. I don't know. Clap, comedia. Yeah. OK. So. And HPV. HPV. Yeah, okay. So- And HPV. HPV, yeah.

Okay, amazing. Human polymer- Virus. Is that it? Yeah. Yeah. The one that you can get a vaccine for nowadays. Before age 27.

Oh, really? Yeah, after that it's like, oh, you probably got it, it's too late. We know it's a waste for the vaccine. We're not wasting this on you. It's precious liquid. That's true. Cause I went to do it and they were like, what's the point? You?

Yeah. No doubt. No. I was like, oh, well, I was just trying to act responsibly. Now, not then, but now. For once in my life? For once in my life. Okay, here I think I found it. Um, the last one, trickle monon, mononosis. Say the short version.

I think they just call it trickle. No, that's not what I was thinking. Oh, trickle. It doesn't matter. Anyway, yeah, sorry, sorry, sorry. But I don't know, what's your favorite STI? Well, I mean, like, it depends for the... Sorry to anyone who has one.

I mean, listen. No, that's fine. God, we've all had many, right? That's right. Right? It do be like that. It do. I think, like, obviously, the curable ones are the chicest.

Yeah. Super gonorrhea. I think about super gonorrhea all the time. It's growing resistant. It is terrifying. What are we gonna do when the generation after us has to deal with your sins, your lifestyle Zelda? That led to the growth of Supergonorrhea.

Yeah. I, yeah, I mean, I haven't had a STI for a long time. Oh. Yeah. What? Right. There was a time when we were doing Beastie Girls React where like at least one of us would be sitting there being like, sorry, I've got to like have my course.

Yeah. But, um, no, I haven't had STI in like maybe two years. How? Yeah. How is that? I don't know. She's a witch. Vacuums daily.

I mean, I don't think I have as much, I've probably had like a bit less sex, but also like I kind of like, I dunno, not as many condoms. You're wearing condoms. Yeah, but anyway, so that's nice. But like not that there's anything wrong with that. Human papilloma virus. Papilloma. Papilloma.

Papilloma. Papilloma. I said Paloma. Paloma phase. She's also a virus. Palenta. Palenta. Human Palenta virus, yeah.

I mean, that's it. I think that the... It's how polenta is made. Yes. That has been the very surreal thing of getting into a relationship is like, I sometimes get the text messages being like, time for your sexual health test. And I'm like, those are the days. The stress, the heartache.

You know, because like as a gay man, and I think, I assume everyone feels this way, you always assume the worst, like that you're about to find out like some life-changing news. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then it's also like quite chic to go to the Melbourne Sexual Health Clinic, makes you feel like you're part of something. Yeah. Yeah. You know, community. Yeah. Yeah. Doing that little survey at the start when they're like, have you had sex with more than one partner in the recent week? And I'm like, yes, obviously. Yes. What are you stupid machine? Yes. And this machine is like melting. Yeah. Um, yeah, but I transitioned away from sexual health clinic and now I go to Thorne Harbor,

which is very good too. Yeah. But there's no machine for me to have your shame. So yeah. And then like, would you like to participate in this additional survey about you being a giant fucking slut? Yeah. You're like, well, I get to do it for my community.

I guess. Yes. Yeah. Um, yeah. But so I, I mean, I, I think, have I spoken about crabs on here? Crabs. Crabs.

Yeah, we definitely had a whole episode discussing crabs. Yeah, okay, great. Well, I vote crabs. Crabs are very crab. They look like crab. We talked about that. Yeah. They're just super easy to get rid of, which I love about crabs.

Yeah. That's great. Get some lie clear. There's also something that's very 70s about crabs and when everyone had a full bush and the crab could live and thrive. Yes. And then do you know that like there was a noted reduction in the incidents of crabs in the wake of the episode of Sex and the City discussing Carrie getting the landing strip, like getting a

bikini wax. And because there was less environment, you know, habitat destruction. We see this all over the world. You reduce the environment. It's like palm oil and the orangutans, except it was crabs and Kerry's bush. Correct. Yeah. Both just as important and critical to mankind. Yeah.

True. Yes. True. Yes. Yes. Yes. Anyway, yeah, crabs great. Syphilis goes to the brain if untreated.

I think that that is really interesting because there are instances where it's like, you know how they talk about how there was like lead in the air because there was lead in fuel during our parents' generation? Did you hear about this? Like there used to be lead in petrol. Now there is no longer lead, but that's why it's called unleaded petrol.

Mm-hmm. Across the... you don't know what I'm talking about. I know! Unleaded petrol! Anyway... It goes in the car. That would go into the car. Yeah.

And it was to stop the engine from knocking. Or something like that. Anyway... Knocking? Engines run! God! Sorry about that, everyone. And then, so the lead would go into the air, people were just inhaling more lead.

It was also in paint. It was just everywhere in the environment at the time. People thought that lead... Not at the time. And then everyone realized that lead made you go crazy. Crazy. In the like very old school ways, like mad as a hatter because they worked with a lot of lead.

And so there was just lead and they think that there is a correlation between the lead that was in the atmosphere while our parents were developing their brains, and the amount of boomers that have really weird and poor emotional regulation. Like why, like there are the incidents of Karen's, and like people that just like blow up and have these kind of insane meltdowns of that generation

that it might actually be a result of lead in the atmosphere. Yeah. Okay. To tie it all back, syphilis that has gone untreated, sometimes there are some older gay men where they are absolutely wild, crazy people. And I think there was a time in the eighties where the syphilis was going to the brain. And they got that syphilis brain damage. Yes.

Maybe, maybe. I think that that's how you end up with this amount of flamingo labs and like zebra cushions. Yeah, I give you the only explanation. It's gotta be a syphilis. Yeah. Not that there's anything wrong with that. If only they just got crabs. That's it. Yeah. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

If only they just got crabs. That's it. The point is it's not your fault. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I mean like- Just blame it on the lead and the syphilis. That's right. Oh, you think it's-

You need to work on yourself. You're like, people don't- It's an obfuscation of responsibility. Yeah. I always just, I think about that when I see someone wilding out, I think. Poor, poor dear. Oh my God. When I was in Edinburgh, Scotland,

there was, I was like, oh, and look, the water is like good to drink, like da da da. My friend was like, yeah, just not from like my house. And I was like, what? And she was like, yeah, yeah my house the pipes are bad but like other places yeah you can drink the water and I'm like like do you know for sure and they're like yeah it's just some places have old pipes because it's an old city and I'm like right and she's like my friend for instance found out that she was getting lead

poisoning from her apartment when she was drinking the water and she was like having these really intense nosebleeds and massive headaches. And then when she would go to visit her boyfriend in London, the headaches would stop and she'd stop bleeding. And then she'd come home and keep drinking the water. And it turned out she was just getting a low dose lead poisoning the entire time. Sorry. Wow.

What? What? Excuse me? And does she have any like questionable interiors? Well fringe happens there every year. Let me tell you, if that's not lead poisoning en masse, I don't know what is. I mean. That's right.

So I don't know, maybe super gonorrhea. That's kind of funny. I don't want super gonorrhea in the bunker. Nobody wants super gonorrhea in the bunker, but it's going in. But like what, who in our bunker for the end of days. Like what's the... Well, Nikki, Velle, has been just prescribing everyone, you know, everyone's got gonorrhea and she's just pumping out the pills to help. But that's where it falls apart. That's where super gonorrhea joins the show. What are the symptoms of regular gonorrhea? It's burning. Burning, leaching. Leaking.

Yeah. The liquid. Yeah. The fluid. I don't know how, I mean, I really don't know. That's the clap. That's gonorrhea is the clap. I just read it. Oh.

Aha! Well, that's, I'm, I'm sorry. I don't care. Because I like the name the clap. See, I don't, that's't. That's like drugs to me. You know how people are like, Oh, that's a blah blah blah. Wait, so what's that? Yeah.

And like, Oh, let's blah blah blah. Which one is that? Yeah. Like I'm not doing enough drugs to know what, what is, you know? Well, apparently in Scotland they call Molly Mandy I see that's great you were doing Mandy and I'm like who's Mandy some kind of doll your father found for you at the side of the road Mandy Mandy I do love the name Mandy but if you added a moves to to the end, she's going to be

a best best guest. She's going to be a guest on this podcast. Yeah. To Melbourne soon. Oh yeah. Let's do it. Listeners. Think of what you want to ask Mandy Moobs and send it to death.com. Um, gonorrhea. I think I like, I think the thing that I like is when you have a bonding moment with another queer person about the kind of antibiotics you're taking. I think that that's very communal. Yeah. What have you got today in your lunchbox? That's right.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. some straight people about like, Oh, I got to go to blood test. I'm getting like my, like depending on how much I know these people will be like, Oh, I'm getting my like STI checks or whatever. You're talking to someone on the bus. Yeah. But, but some straight people will be like, what?

I've never been tested. Literally not once. I think as well, like, like what do you mean? That's the biggest adjustment for me from being like a gay in like a small country town, well not country town, like from where I grew up, where we were like terrified of HIV. But then when you come to the like the city and also like where we are at now medically, it is not this like, oh my god, your life is over. Yeah, no.

Like, it is completely treatable to be undetectable, to live a life that is exactly as it would be. So it's just like, I think that that is a huge transition mindset as well, because there's still a lot of straight people and gay people out there that carry around this understanding of HIV, like it is like, oh my god, your whole life will be over. And it's like, no, it's not like that. You know, you can have like a completely regular sex life as well after that and still take raw loads. Jesus. Thank God. And give raw loads.

Yes. That's right. Important. That's right. Important. Important, right? But also important to just like, no. Right. And yes, so strange how many people just don't know. Well, exactly.

As Alyssa Edwards walked past me and said at DragCon, know your status. Get her the back of the winner's line. Who did she say that to? No, she didn't actually say that. But wouldn't that be incredible? Honey, know your status. Or whatever she says. You may be a winner, but you're not the front of the line.

Honey, you're not an American winner. You're not even a Canadian winner. You'll never be a UK winner. No down. You're down under winner Yeah, so get down under the line Super gonorrhea it is. Yeah, why not? No, wait, you know what? Why not combine super crabs? Super crabs. I like that. Oh They find a way. Yeah. Sneaky super crabs.

Super crabs. Why were we talking about crabs on the pod last time? Well, we've been like, they actually part of the whole text of the show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because we talked about how many times they've evolved. Yes. In human culture. I'm just scared that we've, no, we would never tell the same stories or go over the same

content. Well, do you know what? It's fine. We have new listeners now. They don't know about the crabs. We've got Buggy. Buggy needs to know. The show is just for Buggy now. Buggy.

I love that. Where do you think he listens? On his old, it's like a faux vintage record player that also does Bluetooth sound. And he sits out in his outdoor wood like wood heated stove bath and like heats his bath water and listens to this podcast until the battery runs out like three minutes in. I hope so. Let us know in the email. Send us an email.

Oh buggy. It do be like that. It do be like that. How are you listening? How's the end of that? Oh, that's good. Okay. Supercra that. That's good. Okay. Super crabs.

You're in. Cabs. Cabs. Welcome back, all. Hello back, all. Hello, back all. On to our next... I feel like you're to you all. Bye, Lick-Lick. Bye, Lick-Lick. You get one. Get one.

Get one. Yay. Do you know, I did write down one little thing. I just need to get off my chest. I just think it's really funny. Okay. So someone on drag race down under r slash drag race down under wrote this. This is the Reddit for those of you who don't know. Is it just me? Is drag Race Down Under just very, very weak? I don't know.

I find myself not really getting into the contestants or really getting anything other than bitchiness from them. Feel free to disagree, but I don't care about the last season at all and honestly can barely remember any of the queens either. Okay. Zero likes, seven comments of people just being like, why are you here? Yeah. But do you know, I was like, okay, that's fine. Everyone's like got their opinion. But do you know whose opinion that was?

That came from commenter, gay scat pig. This person would rather shit than our show. Is there a gay scat pig to offend your fine taste of being a little scat pig? Yeah. Highbrow. Yes. Sorry, darling. God sort of take you away for the fucking opera of your life.

Gay scat pig. But also just gay scat pig being like, I don't know. I just don't seem to like this. What? Gay scat pig. Not to their taste. Maybe it's like a really fancy Englishman's name. We have the brat and gay scat pig.

Lord scat pig. The scat pig. The third. Gay scat pig. Sorry. To you I apologize, gay scat pig. Sorry. To you I apologize, gay scat pig. I didn't realize I was in company of the grand vizier of arts and culture.

Scat pig. Scat pig. I have another little Reddit moment. This time from the exotic monk 1914. This time from the exotic monk 1914. Okay. Homona Lisa felt the enemy in Katy Perry general discussion. I love this. So at a New York city viewing party tonight, Plasma had Susie Toot tell a story about a

particularly religious girl in the cast. If you're not listening. This is in reference to season 17 of Drag Race. It does sound like Chat GPT at this point. That's what had Susie Toot. Like what? Sorry. Sorry, our culture is stupid.

Yes. Susie Toot named Hermona as a queen, oh, as that queen, and said that she's always talking about God and the devil, and that when she hugged Katy Perry, she felt the presence of the enemy inside her and prayed for Suzy at the night in her room after the devil horns on the runway. Lol. I love this development.

That is the funniest thing that has ever happened to a celebrity guest judge. And for it to happen before, like they filmed before the album flopped. Oh. Do you think that that was the devil that Homona was feeling in Katy Perry? It was in the going, one, four, three. Is it going to be what you want it to be? One, four, three, six, six, three. Is it going to be what you want it to be? One, four, three, six, six, six. You thought having angel numbers or whatever the fuck

as your marketing would help. No. The enemy is inside Katy Perry. So I do need to say that I have not watched season 17, but I did meet all the divas of season 17. Oh. Because they were at DragCon UK. Fun.

And Susie is lovely. Very, She was like, I was like, oh, obviously, this is the person that I'm like, yes, I get along with you. We both dressed up as devils for our makeover challenge. Sorry that, you know, I pepped you to the punch on that one, but yours looked infinitely better. I haven't seen the episode, I just saw the pictures. My dear friend, Susie Toots. And then, Hormona was there, but I've never seen someone so shy in a dressing room.

She was just like tucked away, looking sad. But I love that vibe. And do you know what I love so much about this Hormona Lisa? She was like most of the girls, okay, you need to imagine, are picked by casting directors. So their personalities are the people that rise to the top of like 4,000 audition tapes.

Yeah. Jhomana Lisa. Jhomana. Was a woman in drag on RuPaul's book tour. This is the best case for just randomly casting a few of the girls. Yes. Because when would we ever get this fucking flavor? Yes.

It is so cool and weird. Because she's not like any drag queen that's ever been on the show. She's very peculiar to watch. It's amazing. It's a way. So you've not watched any of season 7. No, no. Three episodes down and there's an episode where they have to make their outfits.

Yeah. I think it was this week's episode. It was. have to make their outfits. I think it was, was this week's episode? It was. Um, and so they kind of get like, you know, like the room, like textile wall or whatever. And they do that. Then they come back on the runway day and her Mona has her tail between her legs. And like, there's been this whole thing behind off camera where they're like, the producers have had to step in and homeowner you have to pull all the stones off your gown because they weren't from the mood wall or whatever. They were from the room before.

God help me. They were from her just like collection. And it was like, that's not actually the rules, the rules. We have to work with what was provided. So there's this amazing and like her outfit was great. It didn't really matter. But there's this amazing little scene where she's in the workroom just like angrily ripping all these glued stones off her dress.

It's so good. We need this America. We need this. Yeah. Oh, it's really good. Yeah, I think they do need just like one Rue wild card. Yes. That is not someone who has a TV personality.

We just need some odd girl. Just a woman. Just a woman. Yeah. That is feeling the enemy inside of like Katy Perry. Katy Perry. Which is actually wrong. What you'd be actually feeling inside of like Katy Perry. Katy Perry, which is actually wrong.

What you'd be actually feeling inside of Katy Perry is the cloned spirit of Kate Middleton. That's what dwells within Katy Perry. That's true. As listeners will know. Gosh. Anyway. How was Katy on the episode? A nightmare?

Was she good? What? Katy on the episode? A nightmare? Was she good? What? Katie on the episode. Oh, right. Um, I was like, we haven't had Katy Perry on this podcast. What are you talking about? Um, uh, underused, I would say. Okay. Katie has this like weird energy of like, you know, drag queens who just like show up to the gig and you're And you're like, yeah, okay, here, yeah. And now I was like, yeah. Okay, thanks you guys. Bye.

Yeah. It was that. Like she wasn't like, She was. Supping on every moment. No, she wasn't Gaga. She wasn't Nikki. No.

Nikki had more fun. Ariana. Yeah. Twice. Right. But, you know, she was just kind of like there. Which is annoying because like, like, but I mean, that's Katie. She's very like, like the facade is up and like she thinks that she's so in that she

doesn't need to like get in, but you're not in, you're on the out. So like you're not in. You're on the out. So like, you should dive in. You know, I wish that you were a judge on the show. So you could give this incredible feedback to someone. That makes sense. You think you're in, you're not in. And I need you to dive in because you're out. Thank you. Next girl. Oh, I can see what's wrong here. You're out. And what you want to be is in. You think you're in.

Yeah, you think you're in. So you've got to just try a bit harder to get in. Next girl. Oh dear. Now you, you are in. You're in. But you know what? Your issue is you could probably stand to be a bit more out.

Just a little bit. You don't want to get too comfortable being in. That's how you end up out. Like old mate Suzy Dutes down here. She's going to be a bit more out, just a little bit. You don't want to get too comfortable being in. No, that's how you end up out. Like, oh, mate, Suzy Doots down here. She's going to be out. Katy Perry, she's out. Now what about you? Oh, you're in. Anyway.

What I've seen of this show, this drag race, God, I love that one that is like, I'm probably the most beautiful girl that's ever existed. And I'm like, she's like, I'm not making fun of generic drag queens. But like, who's the one who's like the diva that's like crying in untucked because she's not doing as well as she thought she was because she's such a big deal in LA. Oh, like the Vegas-y gal? No, LA.

LA. She was the one who was dressed like Chun Li in the press. Oh, I didn't look like that. The only Asian woman there. Oh, Joella. Joella. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That every clip I've seen of her has been fucking amazing because that is drag. It's funny. She's crazy. Yeah, she is. I love that. Yeah. She's like, I am probably, probably the most important and most

beautiful person here. And I can't believe it's not going well. I love it. That's in. What an energy. That's in behavior. That is, but she's not in. Sorry. It's not. Well, you're actually out You need to try a bit harder to get in Because she doesn't like she has this like a lot of the girls on this season just seem green But not in they're not in they're on the outside. What about that diva? That's like immaculate I do you mean detox? Yeah, they're like, I think her name's Lexi love Did she that throw the bolt of fabric behind? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, she is Mixed reviews apparently, but I thought that was fun, but she's in she should win

She seems she's so in she she's gonna win every time I see a clip of her, you know in that's in win Every time I see a clip of win, no, that's it Every time I see a clip of her, like even just confessional, I'm like, this woman is captivating. I love. Like, she could like, what a present. Just give me 12 episodes of her and her Mona. And maybe Joelle. Yes.

That would be so good. They're the only ones I've seen. Anyway. So our next topic for discussion is, uh, lighting. Talk about DragCon UK. How dare they? Oh, they're lighting us like we're turbo jets. It is a hanger. You were in a hanger.

We are in a hanger, which is what I'm going to do to my neck later on. Because of this lighting. It is like my eyes are piss slits in the snow. I'm being lit like Bunnings warehouse over here. And the only refuge is to hide in one of the pig pens where there's like one ring light. That's rough one ring light. That's a nightmare. Well, you know how we were in Harper's Bazaar? You and me, the online.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, online. Not in the magazine. No. But an article was written about us on the website. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Lovely. And then how we were only photographed in really bad lighting. Yes. It's horrendous. I could kill... I'm screaming. You know, I look at those photos and I'm screaming. I hate... I hate it.

It's awful. I'm sick of fucking bad photos of me. And there's so many of them. All of them. Have you had a go. I would say, be brave. I mean, what are we talking about? You're. Go on, list them on your little fingers.

No, I would, so there's the, um, no, no, no. No, I would could. So there's the no, no, no. No, no, no. But in what I will, maybe what we'll do, I'll list situations where the photos have presented a bad image. You're a cunt. Well, I'm screaming. But what I will say is, motisha eye lighting. That's in. That's in. You know what?icia eye lighting. That's in. That's in. You know what? That's in. Morticia eye?

Yeah. What does that mean? You have to decode. You know when you're watching the Addams Family? Yeah. And there's a scene with Morticia Addams. You wouldn't just watch the Addams Family. You'd watch Addams Family.

Well, she has fabulous lighting across her eyes. Ah, of course. Kind of a soft, diffused light and shadow above and below. Just across her eyes. Ah, of course. Kind of a soft diffused light and shadow above and below. Just on her eyes. Illuminated. Yeah. Just to make sure that you know where to look and that's in her eyes. Yeah.

What was that? It's in her eyes. It's good to know where to look. You know. You know. You know. You know. You know, right?

It's like probably 45 degrees in the studio today, everyone. It's really intense. You lost it. It's in your head. You leave Angelica Houston alone. Okay. I'll just look at her eyes. Her what?

Her what? Her eyes. What are you saying? What are you saying? I'm saying look at her. Because I'm saying what lighting we should put in the bunker. I just want... Okay. I'm sick. I'm saying what lighting we should put in the bunker. I just want... Okay.

I'm sick. I'm sick. I'm sick of bad lighting. But why is it everywhere? The sun. Sun. Culprit number one? Yeah, it's the sun.

Oh, you couldn't have spent another day on that one? God. You know what? The counterpart to, is the sun. Oh, you couldn't have spent another day on that one. God. You know what? The counterpart to that is the moon Moonlighting that's quite cheek. I also love just When the sun's just gone down. Yeah, that's beautiful. That's good. Golden hour golden hour And then diffuse Diffuse diffuse light. Yeah. Oh my God.

I screamed at the Welsh woman from Wales who was interviewing me from Hunch. Oh, I saw. No, there was more. Oh God. Oh, the press room. Darling had such fun in the press room. Darling, I had such fun in the press room. But I was like, hello, Hunch. And then I was like Elizabeth Taylor's Welsh.

And she was like, no, she's not. And then I just screamed out to some random faggot who was around. I was like, Elizabeth Taylor's Welsh. And then he was like, what are you talking to me? And I'm like, Elizabeth Taylor's Welsh. And then he's like, what? And I was like, you Google, we're going to have this interview. You Google whether Elizabeth Taylor is Welsh. I think I have civilist. And then he like interrupts the interview like a minute later and he's like, Elizabeth

Taylor isn't Welsh. She was married to Richard Burton. so was trying to like learn Welsh. And blah blah blah. And I was like, no, her mother was Welsh. You Google whether Elizabeth Taylor's mother was Welsh. I know it. I just know it. Anyway, next question, what were you saying? And then five seconds later, Elizabeth Taylor's mother, no, how could she not be Welsh?

I'm sure I've seen an interview with Elizabeth Taylor's mother, no, how could she not be Welsh? I'm sure I've seen an interview with Elizabeth Taylor's Welsh mother. Maybe it was her father. And this poor guy that's just being singled out, is like, okay, but you get one more of these. And I'm like, tell me, tell me Elizabeth Taylor's Welsh. And he's like, no, she's American. I was like, well, sorry about that.

But Tom Jones, he's like, no, she's American. I was like, well, sorry about that. But Tom Jones, he's Welsh. And? That's all. Can confirm? It's not unusual to be loved by anyone. What is for you? Do you see? I go away, I become brighter.

I start screaming. Zelda becomes the villain. I've become darker. Yeah. In good lighting. Well, that is better lighting for you, darling. Bitch black. Wow. Yeah. Nosferatu who? You. I want to see it. I still haven't seen it. So we were going to see it and then you saw it. Cause you were living your life. Do you know what? I was going to see it. I'd also, and this person doesn't know yet.

I'd promised Julia that I'd see it with like drag queen mom. Let's see it with her. And I have, I haven't told her my reason yet, but it's because when we got to the cinema, we were going to see baby girl. Baby girl. Yeah. So Nicole Kidman, the tickets were booked for the wrong place. And so we had no other option than to see Nosferatu. And let me tell you, I was

like, it's okay. I'll just go and see it again with mum drag queen. I have never seen that movie again. I would sooner die. I can't keep up the lie. The charade? No. Eggers! How was the lighting? Oh, good. Oh, good. Yeah. Yeah. I haven't seen a track, like I've... It's bad.

Okay, yeah. It's foul. And then I... Ugh, The Vitch, hate it. You didn't like The Vitch? Don't like The Vitch. Oh, see, I enjoyed Vitch. Hate Vitch.

I like Vitch. Hate Northman. I hated Northman. I can Vitch. Oh, see, I enjoyed Vitch. Hate Vitch. I don't like Vitch. Hate Northman. I hated Northman. I can't believe. I hated that movie. I don't care if you want to set up a little playtime village in some part of Scandinavia every six to five months to make one of your films that are lifeless, humorless. Have you met a woman?

I don't. I don't think he's met a woman. I'm thinking back on the bitch now. Nicole Vidman? Yeah, exactly. I think that she was bringing the gravitas to a role that didn't demand it. Bug eyes. And bug eyes. I think that was like, the bitch isn't really about the bitch herself.

It's about the dad and the goat. Oh my goat. Do you know that they forced that goat to retire from acting because it was so aggressive on set. I love that goat. Maybe that's the goat that we put in the bunker. The goat greatest of all time. Do you think that the video?

So like, so, okay. Slut pop amazing album. So fun. Great 15 minutes done. I like that. Yeah. Then the next one came out, whatever that was called and like, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fine.

Then like, I just can't help but feel like Slut Pop Miami was the realization of like, okay, the album after Slut Pop didn't do as well. Yeah. People want Slut Pop. Then we do Slut Pop Miami. Yeah. I just don't know how to feel about that. Like I understand giving the people what they want is important, but like,

I don't know. I think it's done. I think it's done. I think Kim Petras is done. I think it's done. Slop pop, that's great. Incredible. When you say something about, they're like, oh, like my coconuts.

You're like, yeah, that person. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's it. I just think that there was an issue. There was an issue with live performance for Kim. And then there was that video with her and Nikki. And then they did that song with, what's his face? Dr. Luke.

Oh, all of that. But no, I mean doing the thing with Smith. Aiden Smith. Who? Isn't she on that like, huh huh huh huh huh huh? This show is great. What are we talking about? Sam Smith! Stupid body. Oh, that was a hit though. That was like, that was like a certifiable hit. No, I'm not talking about that.

I was like, that is like, that's where she broke into the mainstream. And then I think it was just like, the issue was there wasn't like a big enough splash to go with it for the VMA performances for the, like, I was like, she just, she wasn't like a big enough splash to go with it for the VMA performances for the like I was like she just wasn't chapel with the gaming crossbow I don't think she had the stage presence yeah no she doesn't she doesn't though she doesn't even in music videos she doesn't and it's because she talks such a big game and her music is so ballsy and like out there. And like, yeah. She's very 717... Season 17 divas.

Yeah, but then it's like... And then you don't back it up. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, so... What did Dr. Luke study? Get out. But yeah, she also should have just like, what was the doctorate in? Yeah. I think it's fake. I think it's stolen. Valor. Not really a doctor. I think that they, yeah. And also

she should have just cut the Luke. Yes. But I can't figure out like to what extent all of these artists are like, like obviously the Katie is optional because I think she could work with whoever she wants to work with. But I don't know how much other people get to like be like, no thank you. Yeah. Like I think that at a certain point you're like, no, you've got to work with that. But I also feel like Katie is probably automated in a way. Like I don't know how

artistic, you know, like investment is there to really pick and choose the best of the shoes. Just be like, oh yeah, this is what the production company is doing. Whatever. Like I don't think she's like crafting these songs. What do you mean? You don't think just because it's over doesn't mean it's really over. And if you think it over, maybe I'll be coming over again. And I know. No. OK. But anyway, I don't know.

OK. OK. Lighting lighting. I like when it's like a nice front-on, multi-bulb, three-point lighting, if not more. You need a key light, two gorgeous side, and maybe a little halo light. Although in drag queens sometimes it doesn't work. Although, you know what I love? Singular flash, diffuse.

Daytime daytime flash. That's hot. Oh, what am I jumping in the field? Do you think like club night or like night out put flash on for a photo with drag queen? Well, this is the thing about iPhones. Their flash isn't good enough. It's actually not good enough. I think the better option is two phones,

one with flash like torch on. Yeah. To like have the light and then you just take your photo. I haven't found a solution actually to being photographed. You know what I mean? I do. I hate it. Yeah.

I'm like, this is too much. I just want to be like, I want to look good. And people are posting images, where to look good? The thing is in motion, I feel like we always look good. And then still, oh no. No, that's the issue. Not still. No.

I just, I think like just, I need, and this was the big revelation actually in Alyssa thing. She has a team. You know what I mean? thing. She has a team. You know what I mean? Marina Summers has a team. These divas that are immaculate, they have a team working the shit out. They have their photographer.

The photographer's not letting a single bad photo of them through. A team. And I think that that's like, most people need to learn like if you think a celebrity always looks good Barring a few like genetic anomalies Most of it is that you've only ever seen controlled lighting versions of them that have generally been retouched That is that is the key in the tea to like looking good. True Imagine having wealth to erase images online. Like celebs who

like the dick pic releases and they get scrubbed or whatever. Yeah. Imagine. It's hard to get that shit scrubbed. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So maybe the lighting from Chris Evans's dick pic? Was that poolside? It's black and white. It's that's full size. It's full sun. It's nice. It casts a great shadow. The dick.

Yeah. I just, you know what actually is my favorite type of lighting. It's like, and mom has this in her house, like track green one. It's like, and mom has this in her house, like drag queen mom, mirror, and then LED light, and the mirror is set out a little bit, and the light is diffuse across the wall that is bouncing into your face. So it's like there's no directional light coming at you.

It's all just what's coming off the surface of the bathroom wall. That's nice. That's nice. Yeah. What about bulbs around the mirror? I mean, that's like, I've got a big like kind of like Hollywood style makeup mirror. You? Which is fan, like it's so, it's so good for getting ready. Yeah. Just like everything is just lit. Nothing is too much. Yeah.

You can just see your face. I can just actually see things to get it done. Yeah. So that's good. But like, I don't want something practical. I want something fabulous. I mean, obviously like, you know, like various like lamps or whatever, I'm sure. But like. Yeah, I went into a friend's house, dear friend of mine, when I was staying in Edinburgh, just blue light bulbs in the bedroom, like

cool toned light bulbs. Like white light. White light. Oh, in the bedroom. In the bedroom, in every room in the house. So you're lying in bed feeling like someone's gonna come up with a scalpel and cut you open. Yes. What?

Absolutely not. No. I mean, I was actually gonna replace the light bulbs. I couldn't believe it. I was like, I just, I was like, this is my friend. How is she living like this? And I have a responsibility. This is like, how, how could I do this to her?

Let her live this way. It's like if I came in and she was like shooting heroin between her toes, I would have a responsibility to do something at that point. And it was like that. Well, she said ironically enough, she couldn't be doing it. I'm like fucking lighting. Jesus. Oh, I'd rather she was shoot heroin under soft lighting. Find the vein, darling.

Yes. Find the vein. Find the vein. Find the vein and your vanity. Get the good lighting back. Find yourself respect. Get that white bulb out of the bedroom. Wouldn't have that gaze back. Find your self-respect, get that white bulb out of the bedroom. You know who wouldn't have that? Gays back, it's Cat Pig. Taste.

Taste. Taste. Anyway. What about fireworks? That's, yeah. Do you want to be lit, smiling? You're a dead wife holding a sparkler as your life is being like, you know, in a memory.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. In that photo. She was so happy then. Yeah, like short video. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's kind of fun. Yeah.

What would she be saying? Oh gosh. What's that woman saying? What is she saying? I don't gosh. What's that woman saying? What is she saying? I don't think this is celebrating New Year's. These fireworks. Fourth of July.

This feels more Fourth of July. This is America. I want to say this is like kind of one of those like spacious, I'm picturing like Louisiana, kind of like, like, there's no fences on the property because it just is expensive. Walk up, step over the truck. And they've hosted the event for the friends and family. Yeah, barbecue in the front yard. Yeah.

And these kids running around and it's the nine o'clock shown at the midnight show. That's how the photo or the short video is so clear. So I think she's saying something like, I'm so happy you guys are all here tonight. See my version, she's getting filmed. And because she's dead now, like, and what made her so good was that she was modest. She didn't know how beautiful she was. And so she's like, stop it. Stop filming me.

Oh, I see. No, I don't like it. Stop filming me. Oh, I see. No, I don't like her. No? No. You're a monster. Everything's exploding. The sky is alive. The sky is on fire, Jerry.

Well, we could put that video in. That's the kind of lighting. Okay, so the lighting in the bunker is you're being lit like a dead mum in a memory. Yeah. Holding a sparkler, which provides one side lighting. Then the kind of ambient street light and then explosions in the sky and a few from the porch and of course, you know, she's got a porch Yeah, she does Stop filming me This is the best night of my life

If she said that I think you know what is endearing for like memories of dead people when they're like doing like I'm a big monster watch out I'm gonna come and get you yeah that's like uh weren't they fun I'm a big except they'll have some stupid name for it that Macedon's coming to get you I'm coming to get you. The super grab. Yeah. Yeah, that's us. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Oh God. Even God can't help you now. And what about a... Maybe that's what she's saying. The enemy inside of her really. The fluorescent lighting. Also like a little pull down little light bulb that's on like a swizzle stick thing.

You know, like it's like if we... What are you saying? What am I saying? Like if we... You can't point to things. No, no, I'm going to point and then explain. So we have like this big dangling red ball in the recording room because of course we do. And, but if we tapped that like a cat might, then it will ricochet back and forward for some time. Swinging light bulb with like a little

shade across the top. So there's some like, it's like harsh directional poker player light. Yes. Yes. Kind of like smoking dog or whatever. Yeah. Yeah, are they smoking? No, they're playing poker. Well, the mom is dead. Oh, spoiler alert. What?

Psycho. I'm not talking about psycho, I'm talking about that portrait of all those dogs. You know all those dogs? I do know those dogs. Okay, well, thank you. And I said thank you. And now we can, I said thank you.

It's kind of like that lighting in Jaws where they're telling the story about how he's like lost at sea with all the men and they were getting eaten by sharks. What the sun on the beach? No, not that lighting. Yeah. Do you know what? One last thing on lighting before we finish. Just RGB lighting. Bitch. That's all.

Well, I mean, I know it's, I feel, have we done lighting before? Do we do lamps or something? We did lamps. We didn't do lighting. Well, I mean, I know it's, I feel, have we done lighting before? Do we do lamps or something? We did lamps. We didn't do lighting. No, because we think we did lamps and I... Did we put an assault lamp? Did we? Was it when I got my lava lamp? Oh, yeah.

Maybe, maybe I got that across the line. Anyway, the life events we've been through. I know. But the LED strip lighting obviously is like at the bottom of the crash pile in New York. I fucking hate it. Okay, but here's the thing. No. No, and I know I just need to explain something to you and be vulnerable here on the pod. And then I then we can let it go. But now I feel shy because I'm going to get mocked.

Safe space. Safe space. You get one per episode. We have these like sconces that go around the top of our ceiling. Like mouldings. And there is a lip on the moulding that protrudes quite a great deal. And I'm intrigued when I look upon the ceiling, whether you could hide like a strip so that you couldn't see it in the scones.

You can hide the strip. You can't hide the lighting. And if I only ever turned it on orange, it would look like a very like chic hotel. And if I never acknowledged the other colors, there was never a pink night or a blue night or whatever. And it was always someone's going to find that remote. They will. They will just, and they'll switch it over and you'll enter the room and it'll

be swap all of a sudden. No, you can get that lighting. That's just a golden glow. Golden glow. Not in an LED strip. Yes you can. They have options. No, no.

And that's where it falls apart. That's the issues. This is why people can't have Samsung products. And this is why we can't have LED strips is because given the option, people fall to the lowest common denominator and they're repugnant in their Which is like the blues cool. BLEU BLEU BLEU Ooh baby red now. I'm gonna have fuchsia pink in my house.

Get fucked. Did Harmony Corinne direct your fucking lounge room? No. I'm just like and then I'm gonna have widgets. The only time that you get to have a hot photo with blue lighting is when you have gone out into the real world and have Chanced across some cool store with a blue neon in the front window then get your photo Not in your lounge room. Not on Twitch on Twitch Okay, and I you know, it's the thing where you think you see it now and it's not special No Like I know you're just in a fucking rental with white

walls turn that light off yeah stop lying if you want a personality get some fucking artwork on the wall yeah how about that and not something from fucking overwatch oh you know that nerd Forge lady yeah with no finger yeah yeah she's always advertising those magnetic... Martina. Martina from YouTube. Yeah, her name's Martina. I know. I'm... And Hunzy.

Don't forget about Hunzy. Which is kind of rude that his name's Hunzy. Hunzy is so hard. Well, that's the good thing. Her name isn't Hunzy. God, that's rude. She's always advertising those dank metal plates that she's always using. Yeah. She's always advertising those magnetic...

Yeah. She's always advertising those magnetic... Martina. Martina from YouTube. Yeah. Her name's Martina. I know. I'm... And Hunzy. Don't forget about Hunzy. Which is kind of rude that his name's Hunzy. Hunzy is so hard. God, that's rude. She's always advertising those dank metal plates that you can change up. Displate.

Sorry, what did you call them? It's called Displate. Display? Displate. Displate. Yeah. Because you display it and it's a plate. They're fucking awful. Listen, you can buy a variety of these

displays. They're just sheets of metal with ugly prints. Yeah. And they all come with like a magnetic little wedge that you safely adhere to the wall. Yes. Essentially a command strip. So you could do this with any picture. Well, but they had saying, if you buy this, then you can just change it every three to five months. Buy another display. With new artwork. Specifically from the display universe. That's very generous. Well, and they have so many options. One Piece.

Yeah. Some other shit. Naruto. Mama. Yeah. Skyrim. Culture's dead. I, it's awful.

Display. And obviously like I've perused the website because you just have to know. I've considered it so wicked. It's awful. Yeah. And also like Hansi and Martina have this incredible skillset. Yeah. Like they can make some shit.

They're not putting Displate in their house. So cool. Like they are so like, like so like they could just do so many things. Like when they buy in books and stuff. And then they make the most hideous books. And they make the most hideous fucking like work room, like fake work room. But the most hideous like, like, oh, the, the, the, like, smogs, like, Dan is in my bookshelf video, but it's so ugly.

It's the issue of that, like, you know, J.R.R. Tolkien set and established a set of fantasy, like, aesthetics, that then were like reinforced by the advent of D&D and like all of this stuff, Gygax and whatever, but like the lesson from those things should have been you can decide on infinite possibilities to do infinite things and people took the wrong lesson and were like no everything needs to look like old timey medieval. Yeah. God damn the like lack of imagination in most fantasy is so bizarre. Can I tell you last night I was watching Lord of the Rings, the two towers with my nephew, I watched that on the plane to fall asleep.

I slept through the whole thing. What a rude thing to say. Well, and then I was the final one and slept through that as well. It's soothing. It's really soothing. Then you'll probably slept through this part, but Gollum, Sam and Frodo are going through the marshes and there's a moment where one of the Nazgul fly over. Yeah.

And they had an extra. The kids for some horrific reason did the Hobbit first and are now doing Lord of the Rings. So they'd never seen the two towers. It was quite an important moment in their lives. It happened last night. Um, but obviously the Hobbit has Smaug, the dragon, obviously big dragon, like a physically big, but also a big character, blah, blah, blah, blah. Obviously inflated for those three fucking movies that could have been won. Anyway, the kids were expecting more dragons. And when the fel beast flies overhead, one of them says to the other, oh, see, there

are dragons in this. Oh, it's a fel beast actually. And I was like, did you say that was a dragon? That's obviously a fel beast. That Nazgul is driving, driving, but worse. Obviously that's what I was thinking in my head. But one of my other nephews was like, no, that's not a dragon. It's more of a wyvern.

I was like, Oh God, I need to. What is that? Oh, well, but here's the thing. Then why I realized that everything is so annoying and stupid is that like, depending on your fantasy world, like token can say whatever he wants is a dragon in his middle earth because he's crafting it. Because people will say like a dragon has two legs, whereas a wyvern has four legs. That's usually like the defining thing or whatever. Or like, or either hands attached to the wings as opposed to being like, you know, like a dog with wings or something, you know, like with four legs, like clear legs and arms. But anyway, what

do you call a dog with wings? This is a joke. No, I'm just curious. What's the specification? Zelda. Anyway, anyway, the point is, it doesn't matter. And I'm so glad that I didn't say, well, actually it's a fel beast. But to you listener, I know that you know. The rest is sort of- You said it in your head. Yeah, yeah. How did we get here?

What lighting are we putting in? I can't even hear myself anymore. We still have another topic. Wait, where am I? Have I- We still have another one. I've turned you off about an hour ago. Wait, where? I actually can't hear myself.

Am I drunk? You've got syphilis. What? He's coming through loud and clear. It's fine. Fireworks, sparkler, dead mother, done. And it was a wyvern, not a smog beast. Smog beast.

I can only assume that's what you were asking about. Hello and welcome back, listener. Dashtan. Dashtan. Dashtan. Third and final topic for tonight is of course, which Trump supporter goes into the bunker? Wait, I was talking about Trump's Hollywood ambassadors. That's the same thing. I think we need to combine two things because you were sending through some and I was like,

oh, she hasn't seen the tweet, but there was like, Trump has his like selected ambassadors to Hollywood to save Hollywood from it's like liberal swamp. Like how Zendaya is like the, um, like she's selling the Lancome mascara at the moment. Is she? Yeah. She's the ambassador. Yeah. Yeah.

So Trump's saying in the new world, there's three ambassadors to Hollywood. Right. Sylvester Stallone, John Voight and Mel Gibson. Oh, no, I missed this. OK. Incredible stuff. OK. Obviously, I just wanted to talk about that Viking. But I think we can include people that are performing at Trump's inauguration. And what about the Viking? Which Viking? The Viking from when they stormed that building. The Capitol.

Yeah, whatever. No, Vikings out. Jamiroquai. It was very Jamiroquai-coded. Okay. Yeah, because he was wearing a headdress. Sorry everyone, but he was hot. Um, I think everyone knows that.

Yeah. It's like, yeah, that's not great to say because we hate him, but he was really hot. Okay. Well, that's, I mean, stupid men are hot. I know. That seems to be the issue. And evil men. Okay. Now who performed?

Oh my God. Wait. So Trump is now in. He's in. That's happened. Okay. The Mormon Tabernacle Choir sang America the Beautiful. Well, we do have to consider that. Are they in the bunker? I love those little Mormon outfits. Jackie Evan Cho, who placed second on America's Got Talent in 2010, sang the national anthem. God. I'll be a national anthem.

God damn. Was that the most recent? That must have been 20... That was 2017. Okay. 2025 inauguration. Here we go. God.

I was wondering why the lineup was so dull, but now he's got his like... He's got his like... People are rallying behind him. So his people, the village people, the village people, kid rock, obviously Billy Ray Cyrus and Greenwood and the Liberty University's praise choir. Oh, and then Jason Aldean rascal flats. Life is a highway. I'm going to ride it all night long.

I like that song. Gavin DeGraw and Nelly. But wait, where is she gone? Oh, May. Nelly Furtado? No. Oh, May. The rapper. Underwood.

Where's Carrie Underwood? She was like slated to perform. Yeah, she did. She did? Yeah. She sang America the Beautiful. Oh, there we go. Let's get loud!

That was the Mormons. What? I thought the Mormons sang the Beautiful. No, that was in 2017. Oh, I see. So Carrie Underwood, Nellie, The Village People, Christopher Marchio is an opera singer. Okay. Amazing. What do we think? Amazing!

Well, I'm still thinking about the Viking. What do you think about the Village People? I think that's funny because money does terrible things to all. Do you think that it's money? I mean, I don't know. I don't get how you'd be that gay for that long and then not be gay. To my understanding some are gay, some aren't in like the OG band or whatever. Yeah. But um wow how like morally bankrupt. Fuck you guys. Oh fuck you. I once saw them live. Oh. Because they were at Beyond the Valley. Mm-hmm. Something. and saw them live. Oh, cause they were at. Beyond the valley.

Something on the valley. Have I ever gone to that? No. I watched from gully the other day. What's the other one? But golden planes. So that movie, right? It's a bit of a lit. Is Australian. No. Isn't it? No. Then why are they in- I thought that Elizabeth Taylor's Welsh, maybe.

Because it's like, it's a fruit bat and then there's like cookaburras and stuff. But then obviously it's all like fantasy because there's like fairies or whatever. And dragons. But then, dragons? Yeah. Wervants.

There's no dragons in that. Yeah, wings. That's it? There's no dragons in there. Yeah. Wings? That's a bat. Oh. But the voice cast is like, because like the truckers, like the loggers. Tim Curry.

Australian voices. Maybe set in Australia. But then all of the key players are Americana. So I just didn't understand. And why are you watching this? Oh, because it's incredible. I love that movie growing up, but I had not seen it since I was maybe like six years old and watching it was such a strange experience because all these memories just came for the light and back.

I also didn't remember that it was a musical. Oh, it's a copro Australia and America. Oh, wow. That looks like there you go. And Phone Gully. I wonder if it had anything to do with Furn Tree Gully where I'm from. Yeah. I mean, that's, yeah, that's always what I thought. And then I always thought it was fun.

Oh my God. And then the magical rescue took place in Furn Gully too. I wish you would focus on the topic at hand. Yeah, sorry. Sorry. Carrie, I would love to talk about Ferngali 2. It's so tricky to me because I really like angry country ladies and now I'm like, but it does come with you being a fucking Trump-er like piece of shit.

I mean everyone that you've read off, I don't know any of those people. You know that song that's like, Right now is probably slow dancing Where the bop bop bop and the dweezle and the daze and Right now We just found your second spot number. Oh, they don't know Well, I draw my teeth While the engineer's trying to make pretty little fun

He's falling down Well, maybe next time he'll think before he cheats. No, I don't know that one. Oh, it's good. Oh, I thought it sounded good. I mean, thank you. Wait, I love the words that you're actually saying. God, it's called scatting.

I'm a scat pig. Pretty sure you said four wheel drive. And right now. We're gonna fall in four wheel drive, right now... Four wheel drive, four wheel drive, Merrill and Deere is made before it's reached. Fuck that bitch. How dare you. I just am so, like what a betrayal from two YMCA guys. Fuck you. Carrie Underwood, fuck you. Carrie Underwood, I know that name. Merrill, she won, she won American,

no, she was on American Idol, she didn't win. Carrie. Oh, maybe she did win. But she'll never be Kelly. Said something about slating before and I thought that was funny. Slaters you would find Underwood. Kid Rock.

I've never seen this woman in my life. Okay. Kid Rock. Kid Rock, piece of shit. But has been so consistently a piece of shit. Yeah. Very funny. What do you think about Mel Gibson? I try not to.

An Australian. I know. He was the road warrior in Mad Max. Yes. And what? Jesus? He made the Passion of the Christ. And then he made that other one that was like prehistoric times.

You know? Bicentennial man? He made Bicentennial man with Robin Hood. Oh, he's fantastic. Put him in. Give us a Brendan Fraser as well. John Voight. John Voight.

Father of... Oh my God, Zelda. Sorry. Father of Angelina Jolie. Really? Without John Voight, we don't get Angelina. The only John Voight I know is like George saying that in Seinfeld. Go on. No, just what is, no he's wearing like John Voight's jacket or something. Why do you know the difference between like a lizard tail and a fucking dragon and not this? Why would I reserve space in this petite brain for John Voight? You know who John Voight is in?

And it really just is incriminating that you don't know this. And Anaconda. Oh, no, I know John Floyd. He played Anaconda in Anaconda. He played Paul Cerrone in Anaconda. Yeah, he's like the evil one. That's Angelina Jolie's dad? Yeah.

Wow. Yeah, Angelina Jolie, white. He was in National Treasure as well. You act like you don't know that and he was in Mission Impossible 2 Not to like using that as well. Oh as well. He was in Lara Croft Tomb Raider You act like you don't know that too. Sorry. What he was in the Zoolander I assume in just a cameo quickly, you know, he was in holes Zoolander, I assume just a cameo quickly. You know, he was in holes.

Two. Anyway, John Voight, what a fucking loon. And then Mel Gibson, obviously crazy. Um, and the final one is Sylvester Stallone. What do you think about him as an Arnie fan? No, I mean, I, I am so disappointed by Sylvester because in my youth, you're like, he was this really prominent gay pop singer and now he's doing this. Yeah, I know. Sylvester. Um, it just like, there was a time where I thought that like, Sylvester Stallone and Arnie and who's the

other one, whatever. Yeah. We're kind of like all just like great guys, you know? And then like through time you realize that only Arnie is great. Only only Arnold. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

Yeah. And the rest, I don't know, support Trump or something. I think that Arnold... Pop, pop, pop, pop. So are you going to say something? I was just worried about what might come next. So just... You can't leave it. I don't think you were going to talk about his pet donkey, but...

Okay. Matt, what do you think? Sylvester Stallone, Mel Gibson... Are we just picking out of the four now? Well, considering that Zelda has no opinions on Kid Rock, Carrie Underwood, or YMCA, ladies. No. Village People. And they have that film as well, which is good. No, I don't want any of these freaks in there. You got little freak shows?

Yeah, boo. And Gavin DeGraw also. What song did Gavin DeGraw become? That's what I was just trying to remember. It was like a... Is it? I don't wanna be, and it's raining all over the... Is it really? Yeah, it I was just trying to remember. It was like a f- Is it? I don't wanna be here, that's right.

Is it really? Yeah, it's that. Oh my God, did I just guess that? Am I psychic? Well, you probably just remembered it. Fat chance. I can't even remember. Rice cooker lady.

Did Nelly sing Hot in Here? Is that what he sang? Didn't he sing? Yeah, he sang Hot in Here. It wasn't me. Like a bird. No, it's the rapper. Nelly.

Hot in Here. It's getting hot in here. I don't know where my home is. I don't know where my... Could you imagine him singing Hot in Here in the end of the grade? It's getting hot in here. I think that's just really disappointing. It's actually so hot in this room. I'm going to die.

Okay. Well, you need to finish this episode then. Yeah. Nelly. No, not Nelly. No! What? Nelly potato. We can't put Nelly potato in. You say potato, I think. Okay. Nelly potato in. You say potato, I say. Okay. Nelly potato.

Nelly potato. You know Shakira's also five foot. I love that. I love that. Okay. So. Can I actually? So I was recently trying to, I was doing some like shopping for my nephews

and nieces and I was just looking at books and I found this like corner untouched in the bookstore of like kids for books that was like, um, learn about Nelson Mandela, learn about like Mari Koori or whatever. Learn about Mari Kuri. Whatever Mari Kuri. Learn about Shakira. Was there one that was there? There was one for Shakira. Why is that not being purchased? I true.

I'll go back. Yeah. It was like the company that Shakira was in. Don't say another thing. Get out of my sight. back to the bookshop. What the fuck is wrong with you? Learn about, you have to buy one of the other ones so it can sit in context. So people know that there's other learn about, about Marie Curie.

Nelf and Vandellie. Jesus Christ. Guys, you're losing it. Oh, fictional. Yeah, sorry. Matt's editing this week. So it's clogged. It's over. Who are we putting in? Are you Kid Rock? No, Kid Rock. Why don't we just put in like the amp set? Let's just upgrade Reggie's with like whatever they used. What about that? I have to say, it's gotta be, it's gotta be Carrie Underwood. Okay.

I'll tolerate, you know what, here's the thing. She can't have her hair maintained. I don't think she's maintaining it as it is. Okay, well good. She's getting foils in the deep south. That's what you're getting. Everyone's got wigs anyway, so it's fine. That's it.

But I think the thing about it is like, if I'm going to accept anyone being a fucking Trump piece of shit Republican, it's a kind of like iconic country lady. Like Reba's a Republican. I love Reba. You know, if we have to watch the world burn, I want it to be with Reba in the background saying, what do you say in a moment like this when you can't find the words to tell it like it is? Just close your eyes and let your heart lead the way. What do you say?

I say great choice. Miss Underwood. Carrie Underwood. Carrie. But she has to be physically Underwood. Yeah. Miss Underwood. Carrie Underwood. Carrie. But she has to be physically underwood. Perfect. A hardwood floor. We have those in the bunker.

Yeah. She can be under the floor. George is above. Carrie below. George is dead above. Oh yeah. Carrie's still alive. You can hear her haunting melodies floating up.

It's the beating of her tail tail heart. Okay, thank you so much for listening to Death's Day, everyone. This week, we have put three distinct things into the bunker. Number one. Super crabs. Super crabs, the new variation of crabs that are super. Number two. Does that mean they're bigger as well?

Yes. Super size. They're crabs. They got claws now. Number two, we have the lighting of a dead mother in a movie. Number three, Carrie Underwood is under wood in the bunker. And what a week. And what a week indeed. Thank you for this thing. We love you and if you never hear from us again, it's because this room is so fucking hot okay oh I'm sorry as well to anyone who I've offended from the season 10 17 cast I know that I will watch this season now

glad we figured that out they're my peers Zelda they're my peers well only one of them will walk with the winners. See you next year, darling. Send it to us or get there on www.vardagmail.com And won't you support us please at www.patreon.com slash death to everyone. Bye bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Oh, that you can't find the words

to tell it like it is Just close your eyes and let your heart lead the way Oh, get out of here What do you say?